Hello, I'm Malcolm to the third episode of the real talking podcast with me Ash and J.A.D.A.
And the third episode is a really special episode, it's J.A.D.'s birthday so I'm going
to jump straight into it, I'll give you some gifts right here, I thought it'd be a content
purposes to give you a... Yeah consider it, it's my birthday tomorrow so yeah. That's it, the big free for so have a look through there.
Go for audio listeners only, we've got a very colorful Pokemon bag, Pikachu, Meowth,
Shippo, Charmander, Squirrel, no Bulbasaur, oh yeah only other saws, but Emi as well, and the Snorlax. Also on the talk of Pokemon,
Bulbasaur is really on the right at starter, just saying. I think fucking all of them at the original free anyway are on the right.
I saw some in the other day, someone overriding Charizard, no that fucking don't rate him.
No. That is fucking for a reason, wrong. Right so I'll hold, you start thinking about something.
We've got some Beyblades, I was actually thinking about Beyblades the other day as well.
Look at that, look at the little ball bearings in there.
Crackle these little mini-me, fucking bang that, that kid.
What else we got?
Oh, grab that there, some socks.
So yeah, he's got a pair of socks with Alfie, which is Moidog's face all over him.
God, it's an eye-op.
Right, that's the last one.
So it's a fleece of sorts, probably more so a pro-over. Oh Jesus.
Describe what's on the first jar.
So we've got a lot of Alfie, and a picture of two Moidfabra ladies, Moidwife and yours.
More Alfie and a picture of your lobster.
I was like ten years ago, that one was.
Back on that short hair, look how short your hair is, this is how much.
Short beer, baby beard, no beer.
You might as well shout after.
Well you're throwing up gang songs as well.
Why are we both?
I think one of us just lost the ball, what it looks like.
I think that's what it must be, I'm doing an owl.
Oh, and one last thing.
The card.
The card as well.
We saw a paper, lots of scenes.
A little funk pop, Green Ranger, even though it's black and white.
Happy birthday, have a great day, lots of love.
Actually, can I have Alfie?
I don't know if Alfie sucks rank above your five weeks presence already you've ever received.
What would be the best presence you've ever received?
Probably say, even though it's not something you can use,
the presence from me, dad, a good few years ago now, he was the last arm and you know what he actually won something for,
and it was the Champions League.
So I think there was only 200 of them made, where it's in a proper decoration box,
and then it's a Champions final top, we bought it from Broadway,
and an official match program, all signed on that as well.
I'd say that's probably the best.
Is your name on the back?
Yes, I would say it's Champions.
It was one of the Champions League final, 2008.
I'd say that's probably the best one really.
In general, you can always go down along the first Sky Electric set that I've got,
and endless Pokémon games and other games and that over the years.
I'd say the normal sort of presence, and that would be the best one I'd reccomend.
Probably the best thing your dad's ever got.
Other than siblings.
Yeah, it's strange now.
I mean, I know it's tomorrow, but 34.
34, and as I said, that picture on the face 10 years ago.
I still feel like it's only a handful of years ago since we left school.
We've still got that mindset really.
I look at other people around our age, and I think, yeah, that's a grown man.
Fucking termite.
It's weird, absolutely weird.
These weirds, I look back on that picture, and sometimes I feel like it went longer ago,
and I'm just going, like, we've had going too interstellar on people.
Oh no, it's fucking crazy.
Yeah, I mean, 10 years ago.
24.
Going on 24.
Yeah, not long.
No beard.
No jars.
Nah, more jars back then.
I don't know, I'm not under the knees, guys.
Yeah, not long, sort of, the little bit of the career shift.
They've known I was still doing the sparking.
I've probably done about a year or two of the kitchen and the bathroom work and all that.
So I think where it is now, all the skills and that that I've got behind it.
That's a thing really, because all of when I first left school, was that I'd just be borrowing people's houses for the rest of my life,
and now doing everything that I do.
It's quite an achievement really.
Yeah, it's hard to think the day of 10 years ago, you'd get really exalted over slim fit.
Can we hear you back?
That's what I've trained myself to the other day.
It is a good vacuum.
A new little Henry Quick cordless vacuum, 250 pound.
And you know, it's good because when the Mrs is smiling with it in around the vacuum, nothing else, then you know, it's a good purchase.
Other vacuums are available.
But if Henry do want to sponsor us, then just drop an email to realtalkingpod.com
I'm sure we can arrange something for there.
But speaking of anyway, if anyone's got any questions that they do want to send in or just emails about anything,
send them over to that email address, then all the social medias on the realtalkingpod with AshingJD as well.
Yeah, literally anything big or small, you know, stupid or like serious.
Just if you want us to talk about it, or get us to give us our opinion on it, just anything.
Nothing's too small, nothing's too big.
That's what she said.
Great.
But even if you just want to send a message to say hello or whatever, just bill for it.
Yeah, so I think we should get it out in the open.
More ransom to wait this time.
Because as much as I enjoy walking the dog, it's always a bit of a chore when you have to pick up the put.
But you get used to it, you know, it's part and parcel of having a dog.
Especially your dog, because you need a black bag to pick up that mess.
Well, normally he does it in stages, he'll do one and then four minutes later he'll do another.
But he doesn't help because his little hand is...
So it does seem a lot bigger than he is.
But what cracks me up is that by and by I've got a few farms around and a lot to walk the horses, but a lot of the horses around.
And it always cracks me up because they don't pick up the horse, though.
And it's just trucked all over the place and people are walking through and everything.
So boy, why do we have to pick up the dog though?
But the horse owners don't have to come back and pick it up afterwards.
And we know it's a bit of an inconvenience trying to get off the horse and pick up the sheep and that.
But, you know, if I don't pick it up, I'm going to get a bind.
Boy, don't they get a bind? Surely there should be some sort of a licensee. I can't expect a horse to have a license plate on the back of a bull.
You know, they should have a lock and oid badge or something that the owners have to have and if they get caught...
Yeah, lock on the oid is.
Yeah, then, you know, they should get a bind because it's fucking annoying.
I mean, it doesn't help. Dogs like the smell of it instead of trying to drag you over to it and that anyway.
It's just so frustrating. It's literally piles and piles around the corner, all on the park.
Just fucking, just don't bring them through. It's so fucking annoying.
That's the little rant over anyway.
I remember when my mum died out in the dark and we used to tag her off the park.
We used to roll in cow shit and never understood why we used to do this.
It's the same as the fox poo in that as well because to the dogs it's not perfume and because they love the smell of it,
so that's what they do in the burb in the fur.
Instead of extortion, next to the fur.
Just to spell the smell around.
It's the thing that it's local square in a bit of bloody millionaire and whatever.
I used to hate it when he used to do it.
He used to drive me nuts because I know he had to see a mire lap in the back of the car.
It's like just stinking of cow shit.
And then the hate it because they have to get washed in the mire.
But one thing though, I feel like you appreciate dogs, especially when it's your own dogs.
More when you're older and they're your dogs because I remember the family dog.
I loved my dog.
Obviously because it's my dog.
Because I couldn't imagine life without having a dog.
Oh no, yeah.
So when you're a kid and your parents have got a dog.
Yeah, they used to force you to walk up.
Yeah, I think it's because it's like you're a sibling.
You're a little brother or sister and whatever.
And so the same as your normal brothers and sisters, you're like, I don't want to deal with these.
Because they're getting just as much and if not more love and attention, you're getting.
Whereas when you get your own, that's your child now.
I don't even remember, but obviously coming back, there used to be a lot more stray dogs than there are now.
That's why I think I used to hate it because we used to walk around the dog around the block.
And there's just like two or three stray dogs.
Like just with no owners or whatever.
Yeah, so now it was really like, because you don't know how to act when you're a kid then.
Especially when there was big dogs and you had a lot of little dogs.
Yeah, what was it?
Jack and Scrappy was it?
Jack and Scrappy, yeah, we're starting in Saras.
Yeah, Jack lived to about four years.
Yeah, he was a good age, weren't he?
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, I couldn't live without one. You know, that's my old one past summertime of 2021.
That was a horrible couple of months until I got these spas.
Fuck you.
It was just, you feel empty.
The first lot, where you go, so I still got up in the mornings and went out for me.
He walks, but you soon get over it because I'm warm.
I've got no physical reason other than just getting out of the house.
It is hard, but yeah, it's a way, obviously, makes the home having a dog.
Fuck out there, she is.
Yeah, you've got to have a dog, but you've got to make sure you've got the time.
Yeah, and I think you've got to have the right dog for your life.
I couldn't express enough, like, in the right dog at the right time, how life changing it is.
I know it's hard, but I've got to pick up the dog shit.
You know, you've got to care for him when you go away, when I'm actually on the road, right.
You know, but I couldn't do without him.
Nah.
I don't even know what I'm thinking.
Well, there are always ways I can see you in there.
Is that unconditional love?
Yeah.
For me, just loving you, mate.
So, I've got a bit of a different one for you, because I know that we've never spoken about it.
But have you heard anything called, you know what the Mandela Effect is?
Yeah, it's where you think.
So another scary movie one was like, where in your head, when you think about it, you think,
you take my strong hand, but it doesn't, it just goes, it's like my hand.
Yeah.
It's similar to Dajah, I'll put it in a sense, but yeah, I keep seeing a lot of them, lightly.
And there's a few conspiracies going out, but the main one I've seen floating around is down to that Hadron Colloid,
where it's, I don't know, it seems sweet to learn something to yourself a couple of years ago.
So it's like a big tube, and they're through some atoms around, essentially to, you know, colloid and...
To start with the mini big bangles.
Yeah, to do the research, to try to understand how the universe is created.
So what I think is that as these God Particles being created, that's what splits the multiverse.
And so we're experiencing things from the old, the new earth that we split into, as written things differently, slowly.
Yeah.
So there was another one that I saw the other day, and it was your heart position.
So when we was in school, you know, in the crappy science lessons, where did you remember the heart being?
Well, in our school, Jay, I got taught the heart was in your arm.
But it's not that it was in your arm.
No, it was on your left side of your chest.
Yeah, and then when you used to see, like on the TV or something, someone's having a heart attack, the grab, the let, that was on.
Yeah, kind of like underneath the armpit, that is the glide.
Yeah, but now, apparently, it's in the middle of the chest.
Yeah, where your chest splits, yeah.
The rib cage, or joint scavenger.
So that's battling.
And then the kidneys are in different positions, they're almost all underneath the rib cage and this and that.
And then there was another one.
So, thinking of the song, Mark Jackson, smooth criminal.
So, when you got the chorus, people start, you've been hit by, you've been struck by, a smooth criminal.
But it's not.
No.
So, you've been hit by, you've been hit by, a smooth criminal.
It's kind of like, is it S-Clubs or steps that have done that reach for the start?
They're the same magnitude of artists.
Yeah, yeah, you know, it's not reach up for the start.
It's reach for the start, it's not up in it.
See, I didn't think it was an up in it, so maybe that's me with the new Mandela.
It was S-Club, wasn't it?
I don't know.
It was always in problems, anyway, it was that long ago.
So, about that as things like that, could you imagine it, literally, if it was something like that?
I think it's what your brain wants, like how we remember stuff in a solo and why.
So, the strong hand going back to the screen, because I think in the movie, you just say,
my strong hand, but not at that part of the scene.
So, I think just your brain just trying to connect it all back together.
And when you think a game, when you think of the geezer, the caretaker with the strong hand.
Mashed in a potato.
So, I think it's how your brain wants you to remember it, or think about it.
But the fact that there's so many people that have the same memory of it, essentially,
it's strange to think that that's because everyone is relating it the same in the head.
But really, it's all wrong. It's strange.
I've seen, this is quite a while ago now, I don't know what the book's called now.
But literally, it was spelt this way, but then now it's spelt another way.
I don't know if it's the title or the author.
There was even one chap that I saw, he's holding the book, and he's all, yeah, see, it's spelt that way.
And then without any editing, any cutting on the video, he's holding his phone or the camera,
and he walks into his bedroom or whatever, or the room, and you see the title or change.
And it's just, like, one letter switched around or something.
And it's not how the book was meant to be.
No, no, it's not like one of the bold pages that the book moves around.
It's literally just the book cover, and he walks into another room, and it's just like, you see, like,
so, well, seed, SWE, and then it would change to SEAD.
It wasn't that exactly, but it was like that, literally, it just walks through, and it swaps over.
It's weird.
I think anything unexplained is really interesting, because a lot of people just like to know facts.
Anything where it's a bit mysterious, it just gets people's attention more.
But it's all, I think back, it's not happened for a long time, that's what I think back,
I've had tons of, I've had like a tennis ball or something, and then I've thrown it inside the house,
and I'm like, oh, it's gone under the sofa.
And you try and look for it, it's just disappeared.
Where's it gone?
Well, where's this ball that it's disappeared in, sir?
And you never find it.
A black hole.
I mean, the main culprit for that, are the washing machines.
Where do all the socks go?
I've opened up my washing machine, there's no socks in there.
So, what's, where's these magic holes that it's just disappeared to?
There's nothing worse than I can imagine in life than having socks up down a pair of.
Oh, mate, it cracks me up.
Oh, I don't know.
So for Christmas, I've got some new socks, as always.
I don't know where you've got some more now.
I know, yeah.
You were wearing them tonight.
On my actual birthday.
I've got some new ones and they're the same pattern as some of my old ones.
So they're just black and then around the hill, they've got like a yellow line.
So I've got to make sure that when I'm pairing them back up,
that I've got the crisper ones and then the slightly worn out ones,
because they're only like a year old.
But I've done it a few times, but I've not paired them up right.
And then I'll put them on and you can just feel the difference in the cushion.
And I'm like, you've got to do that because with the gym, I get my socks from Sport Store.
I've got to do that off in the two pairs of seven quid.
So like the newer pairs, you've got to match together.
You can have an old scruffy, I did ask one with like a new fresh one.
It's good.
No, you just do some things in life that you just can't do.
And that's just, no, that's just what I've done.
Yeah.
So sticking on the kind of conspiracy sort of thing, have you seen any of the new program on Netflix, Agent Alvies?
No.
To be fair, it's a good little cartoon.
So it's not, it's just a cartoon, but Matthew McConaughey, he's Alvies.
He's the voice of Alvies.
Johnny Knox fills the voice of his mates and this and that.
And essentially he's a spoiler for whatever organisation it is.
So he does this and that, like I won't spoil anything to anyone that's not seen it yet.
But it kind of relates to the theory that Alvies was like a secret agent, a spy of sorts.
And that he actually didn't die of a heart attack chewing on a sandwich on his toilet.
He said he was assassinated.
So it's quite a nice little little wink at it.
He's that, that's how he's lost boss.
I mean the season finale, the end of it is just bullshit.
But when you're just watching it in general, some of his songs are playing in the back and it just makes you think, fuck you know, he had some quality tunes.
I mean I did do it afterwards, so sat there listening to some of his greatest hits while I was there.
Yeah, I guess some of the tunes playing.
Yeah.
What would you think your favourite Alvies song is?
Love Me Tender.
Bang that.
He's got a few though, isn't he?
Yeah.
Definitely this guy's, get off.
He's got a few actually.
It's hard to hear.
He's got a few actually.
See he had that old album, Alvies number one's in the gold case.
I remember that.
He's got a few.
And he's got that.
In Chicago.
Yeah, I said that one.
And also, he's got a few.
But going back to conspiracies, what would be your conspiracy theory that's like you think you were convinced that happened?
Because there's a few out there, especially in the world now where everything's conspiracy,
but what would be the one that's like, can't tell you that, that's what happened.
Well, I'll have a think of one of those, one I'm just rambling on from any book,
one that I feel strongly for at the moment these days is that when you see the cones on the solvors that are roads and the streets and that,
but you never see any work going on, I think it's just because they've got nowhere to store all the cones and the barriers.
So they're just climbing to the main, on the streets, just to make you think,
oh yeah, there's going to be some roadworks going on.
There isn't, it's just because they've got nowhere to store anything.
Also, going up, before let's go, you speak about roadworks.
What do you want to do roadwork?
I like 9am to 4pm.
One day to Friday, one day to do like on a Sunday.
Like, you know, it's just like a little quick, just quick and fun.
Like, get it done, get it done.
Pay them the double pay whatever they need to pay.
It's always prime time traffic.
Yeah, throw some cones up here, throw like four-way lights here.
Yeah, that ain't going to cause too much traffic.
Who looks at the map and go,
that's a brilliant idea, that is.
Monday, it's a Wednesday.
We'll close this road.
Just so fucking...
And he always drags on longer than he should.
Always. I love when they have the signs.
Work starts here, it's like this day to this day.
And when this day is finished and they're still doing it, the sign gets flipped out.
Yeah, just folded it off.
Yeah, like literally just thrown off the road.
When you see him fucking, use the spray paint over it.
Or they'll remake the date.
I see how they just change, yours flipping down.
Fucking idiots.
I mean, we're going to have to get our lazy bum mates, Leslie on one day, and ask him.
What does he do it?
Yeah, what did they just fucking make out that they got shit to do
and all stand around in a hole doing nothing.
Why not just get the job done, get it finished?
Yeah.
I think about Leslie, I've always...
Because Leslie's one of these characters, you would...
You've got to...
You won't believe him until you see him and his person on it.
And I've always wanted to watch Leslie and Big Brother.
Because I've always...
Or Sherlock that.
Because I always fall.
I can't imagine what he does when no one's around.
Like, I don't know how his brain works.
Yeah, it'd be interesting to see what he's like.
I mean, he's grown up now, he's like...
I mean, every week he was like Rubik's Cube, one week,
and he was like another thing one week, and he's like...
But when he had that little flat, yeah.
With the pranas.
Yeah, with the pranas that I had themselves.
Yeah, but one must have left life.
Yeah, half-hates and still swimming around.
He got a keyboard and he was learning that, wasn't it?
He still does play the piano, so he'd be great.
Maybe he had that really nice piano.
Yeah.
And then, wasn't he on about doing some flying lessons recently?
Ooh.
I don't...
It more just been something that he said in a conversation,
that he thinks he's more of a...
I remember when I did the score, I thought,
oh, Leslie, and Leslie's someone who, when he does something,
he has to be like the best version of that.
So, we're on the plane.
And anyone who's done a score, don't know who that is.
You're sitting in front of someone like sitting behind you,
and then as you're...
as you're off the plane, the rock, yeah,
into the momentum, what was you at the plane?
And I remember the guys just before, they said,
I had something to do here, and I was just doing normal, you know.
Just normal enough, it was good for me.
But I remember Leslie telling me he's done an instructor,
I don't know why you'd call him, like, no.
You have to have someone with you,
so you can do it on your own, so there's so many jumps.
I want to be flipping, I want to be doing some sort.
So, Leslie's went out before me, so as I always went out,
I've looked to more left, and all I've seen, Leslie, doing it,
he's mad some sort in the end.
Like, you know, like the power range is moving.
Yeah.
Like, you know.
Straight out of the plane.
Like, if he had, like, a snowboard, whatever,
I don't know why, why did he have a snowboard in that moment?
No, no, no.
Because he's on grass and grass.
There's no, there's no, like, I've never seen no one have snow,
like, a snow, a snowboard.
On a, like, if he landed it on snow, I get it.
Yeah.
He landed it, you've done it.
The way he has to hit the bang on in the centre of the target.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And all of them just go, come from the inside.
Woo, yeah, yeah.
I mean, they all have to size some cheeses.
Yeah.
Like, like, we don't...
Like, boy, they were all rolled up like it didn't rain in the town as well.
Yeah, we've ordered protective gear on as well.
And I don't get bored, like, throughout the whole of the programme,
the original first few seasons,
Angel Grove is just the small town.
When it comes to the movie, it was not the middle of New York.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What was it so different?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Fucking stupid.
Yeah, that's hanged up.
Still one of the best.
Still one of the best films.
Yeah, still one of the best films.
I liked the, the recently, the recently made.
One, I think it was like six years ago.
What's that recently, about six years ago?
Bill.
The Power Rangers film.
I can't believe I haven't seen it, sir.
Yeah.
I know they do specials every couple of years,
but they bring back a load of brags.
No, I'm trying to think who's in it.
You've got the kid from Stranger Things.
Oh, sorry.
You're on about the actual remake of the film.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it was a lot.
I don't think, I always thought it'd be like a second one to it.
There was meant to be, but I don't know what happened to it.
It ended up with like, throwing a piece of paper,
and you said it was Tommy or something like that.
Yeah, it was who was going to be the Green Ranger.
Or White Ranger.
No, it was going to be the Green Ranger.
What is it?
Obviously, Brita in the film, she had the Green Ranger powers.
Okay, I, yeah.
And then it was the toss at the end,
because I think they were wearing like a green and black,
not tart and shirt.
Yeah, I think you're right.
It was caught up on a life cap.
Well, obviously we went a little bit off top of that.
Yeah.
And then some more.
So going back to conspiracy theories,
well, we saw it's the calm one.
Obviously that is an important one.
Yeah.
What would be the one that sticks out to you?
Uh, I think not that I'll believe in it, but Flat Earth.
Long.
With all these Flat Earthers out there.
Same order.
I mean, there's not a hundred different maps of how Earth is flat
and like all these outer layers with all the continents and this and that.
But if the Earth was flat, where would the water go?
But that's what they're, like one of their reasons is because it's flat,
that's why the water doesn't go off and just float away in space.
Because the more gravity is holding it.
Yeah, as you understand, the life is just flow.
And I literally, there's holes all over the fucking flat of those theories.
But it's, the way I see it, why, why would the lie, there's no reason to fucking lie.
Why is Earth flat?
What the other planets aren't?
Yeah.
I just don't get it.
It's just the fucking stupid conspiracy.
I really don't know why.
And if fair enough, like, near-answer and all that probably didn't go to the moon.
Well, you don't get the bit.
I don't know, because again, when you watch all the little documentaries of the,
yeah, it was all faked and this and that.
You can see why it's, it's, you know, believable that it didn't actually happen.
You might have bought a phone now, it's got more technology in it than the special,
that what I've seen, the gun.
It's, yeah, again, because I think we'll, you know, the bunny,
and now we've got better technology, what are we going to do?
You know, surely there's a lot of things that can be discovered up there.
But still, it's like, I just don't see why we'd have to lie.
But because it was believed to be flat originally,
I think it even says in the bowl that the Earth's flat somewhere.
And so what would the go from saying, no, it's not flat,
it's actually a sphere, almost egg shaped, like a pear, I think,
is what Neil deGrasse talks and says, to, well, no, it's flat.
What's up, Neil? I can't fancy that.
Neil deGrasse talks, yeah.
How good is it?
He's great.
I could listen to him all day, innit?
Yeah, I was, as I was looking for a YouTube, I know he's,
he's a new podcast, he's got a new episode, rather,
and I, yeah, I've wanted to listen to that as well.
I don't listen to many of them, but yeah, he's, he's quality,
just a smart bastard.
I think it makes it better because we're big shits in general,
you know, looking more street smart than anything, but yeah.
He just seems to know everything about spice, time.
Yeah, and he translates to put it into a brand.
You can understand it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So yeah, we can, I'll just listen to him, he's not,
yeah, just get lost into it.
Oh, shit, yeah, that's interesting.
Oh, fuck, yeah, that's how that works.
Yeah, because there was one, again,
relating with the flat earth theory.
So someone gave him a, like a beach ball of the earth,
basically, so it was an inflatable earth globe.
And so remember a few years ago when that chap
was looking right up on the balloon, the red ball,
and he'd done the, yeah, yeah, yeah.
So what he was saying was, if this was the actual size
of the earth, that lad was two millimeters up
the surface of this ball that he's got.
So when you see the footage of his head camera
whenever it is, or the camera on the blue,
and you can see the curve, that's, that's Photoshop,
that's bullshit, because he's, he's that close to the earth,
he wouldn't actually see the curve,
he'd still just see the flat, essentially.
So why would, why would he?
So what I think, because that's one of the things
that I've seen with, oh yeah, you know,
they've said it's Photoshop then because obviously
it wouldn't be that curve, I think he's used one of
the 360 cameras, and then they've merged together,
essentially. Yeah.
That's what I think they've done,
but I am not sure enough to actually see how it's edited properly.
And again, it's probably because the fucking,
I just want to try and shove one down to the flat earth
and say, oh now look, you know, it's definitely curve.
Well just don't say why would it look,
if you fucking prove that it's round already,
and then if it was to some extent,
it'd be found that it is flat.
What would that be?
I don't know, we've been there for a while.
We're going to keep this fucking round on the floor.
Yeah, it's still round.
If you could actually see it, it's flat.
Have you heard the conspiracy of why it would have been
to the moon for so long?
Probably half, but again, I've heard of the moon.
So the dark side of the moon apparently,
they've encountered extra thresholds,
and vice-takers, yeah, they've said vice-takers for car.
And that's why.
There's been a history of things,
and everything quit like, did he die, did he go to Argentina?
Yeah, that's the one I believe actually happened.
That's the one we've closed this up, that happened.
He got out, got to Spain, got to Argentina, lived there.
Yeah, he won't plan what to do.
Because Moscow have never released his body
to be examined, to anyone else.
Yeah, I think it says that they just chromated it
or something, I'm not sure how to write it.
They've done tests on it, said he was,
I'm not sure if they've done it,
but they let no one else inspect the body.
Because they reckon who to know,
he had body doubles,
they reckon he was just a body double,
that guy.
Yeah, yeah, I've seen it, they reckon he doled yours a while ago.
Then again, the wreck has got dementia and this and that,
and that's what fucking he doesn't know what he's doing.
Because I've seen one, where he was in Ukraine,
but apparently everyone's saying that's a body double,
because he's chained, his nose was a bit different.
He's not going around, but obviously his curvature,
his face was just a bit different at the bottom round,
his chin area.
Well, speaking of chin areas,
have you seen what Liam Payne has done?
One direction, Liam, that you spew Chevrolet?
No.
Mate.
So I actually have got a picture of him.
What do you mean?
You'll see the picture.
For anyone at home that doesn't know,
Liam Payne from One Direction,
he's had a jaw realignment surgery, whatever it is.
For what?
I don't know.
Look at the state of it.
It just brought this...
It's like he's trying to ken him, but it also...
Yeah, it looks like a puppet.
Yeah, and in one of the pictures,
it's like he's fucking duck arcing,
you know, with the paint on the lips.
It's just fucking ridiculous, mate.
But it doesn't look good whatsoever.
There's nothing wrong with him before, it's really painful.
No, it's just ridiculous.
It's mad what?
It's full on square red now, isn't it?
It's really mad what people really think of themselves,
and it's like, to think that that isn't good enough.
I've got to do this.
Even in that, he's not even a nice good picture of me.
He's miserable as fuck.
Frowning and that.
But bless him, he covered his beard to show it off as well.
But he looks like the fucking dolphin team America.
He does, yeah.
Because of the way he's got his curtains and that there.
He's square at all, fucking.
It's just fucking horrible, isn't it?
But again, it's money and all that, it's fucking.
Gone to his enemies for an exchange, fucking something.
Staira never made it.
Probably is.
But wouldn't that affect his singing ability?
You would have thought so, and if it weren't...
I don't think he's done much singing like that, though, has there?
You'd imagine it would do.
That's his job, Jack.
I really don't know, but he does these, he's having a headache.
I know Noel Hodrin's still doing stuff.
Obviously Harry's doing his weird stuff all the time.
I've only had a few songs that he's never stopped to do.
What does he dress like a girl now?
I don't know.
I've seen a picture of him in his mind, though.
Yeah, he's absolutely not wearing a full sun dress and all that, hasn't he?
He's doing no harm with that, really.
As far as I know, he's not claiming to be anything else.
He's just dressing fucking whatever he wants.
He's always been a bit...
Well, he's always seemed to come across like that, hasn't he?
Yeah, he's not weird, eccentric.
That's the one.
Of course, he's a brand, isn't he?
But less cocaine.
Probably less sex, as well.
I don't know about that, actually.
Probably more sex, less cocaine.
Well, yeah, he's that, anyway, because he obviously did have a...
I don't know what was the problem, but yeah, he thought he was.
That's why he went through therapy and sessions and things.
God, I'd love to be that rich.
Would shag everything.
Yeah, so...
I don't know, fucking cutie.
He's a...
He's wearing easy worn out.
Either way, it's still some Russian that's just being told what to do.
Or the powers that they...
Because if he's just going to the wise...
So, if it does actually happen to a war, or fucking whatever,
you know, all these banks are collapsing at the moment.
It's just going to be that there's one universal currency in fucking world.
But isn't that another conspiracy theory?
Well, it would be, but...
But it's just...
Like, what one makes...
That's just one person's opinion on something really...
And it's a snowball of why would that make everything...
Because it's an easy way for them to control everything, isn't it?
If everyone's on the one currency, one bank, then they can easily just click at a switch.
But who's controlling? Who's the controlling?
Who's controlling her?
It's just the illuminati, isn't it?
Exactly.
See what I'm saying.
Like...
I think it's just all of the main heads, you know,
the president and fucking whichever prime minister is the power of orcidamomies.
I think they just sort of sit there and like,
yeah, let's just fucking do it.
Let's just pour a mop.
See, from my point of view, I can't imagine a ring and you want to go...
I've got an idea and someone goes, alright, this one, we'll do that.
And then they're retaining someone else.
And they're like, yeah, brilliant idea.
So if you're not sitting where...
Because Trump's going around, he's doing his fucking...
He's due diligence, ready to get elected again for next term.
And a lot of us, the click the other day, he said,
yeah, when I'll get elected again, I'll ring up Putin,
and I'll ring up whoever the other one is, the Ukraine.
The Chondros.
No, no, the president of Ukraine.
The link seals from one of those nins.
Yeah, so I'll ring them up and I'll have it all finished in a day.
There'll be no war.
I'll just tell them this is how it's going to work.
And then that's it, war's over.
And so I think that's him off hinting, putting it out there.
His base would just say, yeah, we're fucking royal friends, really.
We're just doing it because we can.
No, see, that's the only thing, because I know he would act
rather than he would have reacted or act.
So if he was in charge, there's no, in my, how I see it,
there's no way Russia would have invited Ukraine.
We've done our Trump, because he would not have had that.
And that's why I think he thinks, if he comes back,
if he says, look, I'm going to do this, you know he's probably going to do it.
I reckon he was going to do it before, but I don't know really.
I mean, just imagine him sitting in the office, like, that's the red-butter.
Or pretending to sleep and press it and stuff, just having a laugh.
Fucking with his cheeseburgers and that around him.
At least faked that.
I faked that.
You don't need to be faked on in the sense, do you?
Oh no, I'm not.
What's ridiculous?
Yes, I think we've, Trump and all that being friends, I've got the fucking issue.
We've noisy neighbours, and they're not my friends.
So, the fucking kids have run around all night, fucking up until like 5, 1 o'clock sometimes.
And the children, the children are literally just fucking, like, 6 years old.
I don't know why the fucking parents aren't letting them go to bed.
Just fucking stupid.
I think one of the days where you used to have a bed song,
you used to have a bed song, I think everyone had a bed song,
so at least you had to be in your room and be quiet while you're selling something.
Yeah, fucking, I had no choice.
Well, what was it?
Me and Dad's on a weekend, it was all, yeah, you go to bed now, fucking.
And that was it, in bed, fucking don't do nothing.
So remember the fucking, the one house, one fall, three, right on the roundabout,
there was the train track there, remember the one door, fucking going to bed there.
I never locked it in that house, always fell lock.
There was a presence or something there.
Yeah.
And I was like, why not even that light, really, look?
Or, you know, it's dark outside, and the bedroom that I was in,
it was right next to the track, and there was all that trees and all that next to it and that,
and I remember just looking out the window, and remember on fucking,
I can't believe I'm having a film on that,
but where it's like a stick man, literally out of sticks,
I thought you'd turn around and just fucking, what was the film?
I'd made it on the camera, fucking, the Rind of Woods and stuff.
Blair Witch Project, that was it, yeah.
So, fucking, she's turned around and there's just the fucking stick man, fucking, up there,
looked out the window and that was it.
There was a fucking, the way the tree branches had lined up,
and you used the stick man, fucking lay there, but I was, I just couldn't sleep,
because I was just scared, they're not fucking, absolutely hazy.
Yeah, I'll just fucking, I don't see what the fucking,
they have to be so noisy all the time, because it's not just the kids running around at stupid o'clock.
The other week, fucking, Sunday afternoon, about nighttime,
it was literally like half eights and the banging around,
fucking, like the slamming the doors and that,
you could hear them bouncing up and down the stairs,
and then it wasn't a vacuum, it was a different noise,
it's a new log, no noisy blender, fucking.
Which one was making the smoother?
Yeah, fucking the proper bag of nails and instead of fucking food.
And, I mean, it was that lady who woke her mrs up,
she'd already fucking bat us late,
and fucking, five minutes away from going down and banging on the door.
It's just so fucking annoying.
And you're fortunate enough really,
your neighbors aren't too noisy apart from when they're having an argument or something on the doorstep.
And then on the other side, you've got a fucking Ric Flair the dog, fucking.
There's no fucking cursing, people in general, these guys,
they've never used a really absolute plot that,
not necessarily when we were, but more so before our time,
but there's just no respect for most people in general,
and how he's just don't give a shit to do whatever he wants and fucking carry on as fucking idiots.
I mean, for me, I always remember my neighbors arguing,
like in the streets and everything, so like for me.
Yeah, but you basically brought fucking Coronation Street and all the dramas,
and a pedophile on your fucking road,
fucking the biscuit families, fucking every other door away, fucking Baron.
Oh, God.
Pac-Man.
Yeah.
And then literally Nan and Granddad straight across the road as well, fucking, yeah, you had it all.
I was just getting to just all in the, you just play football on the island, it's all in that.
Just all in the grove anyway.
But like in terms of arguments though, I remember like,
so like now, as I'm getting older, there's less, less noise.
Less cats, definitely.
So like for me, it's quite, I think it's pretty quiet for my point of view,
but I couldn't be dating the boy you were dating with, mate.
But it's the one side, it's golden, because literally, fucking,
you don't hear anything from him, you know, they're an older couple, and it's sweet, it's just that side.
And even down to fucking, he's got a Nissan Swift.
So it's only a small car, not big engines or anything.
And with our drivers, there's a little bit of a slant, isn't there?
And he revs the body because out of it, getting it off the drive, and I'm the drive.
How can you make so much noise?
It's just ridiculous, I don't know what's fucking wrong with him.
I don't even think he works.
And that's the thing with neighbours, you don't want to argue with them,
because at the end of the day, you're going to live there.
Yeah, you don't want to.
And you don't want to know, it's like, you don't want to give a fucking revenue car on this fucking drive.
Well, I did it with the old ones before.
So I don't know the girl's name, probably should have done, but she lived there.
And then the lad who was her baby's dad, he'd come around from Tom's tomb,
and I knew him from the pub when we was living there.
And he'd do it sometimes for fucking four or five o'clock in the morning.
He'd be sitting outside in his car, because he had no one every couple of weeks,
because of the guys that he fucking played with, sat in and all that.
And fucking one morning, I think it was a Sunday morning,
he was definitely waking anyway, so he wasn't going out to work.
And he's sitting there, fair enough, I'm up early anyway, I'm up at four o'clock, fucking.
But I'm trying to be drawn up, I've got to say, he's outside, music blasting, revving his engine.
But what you're revving your engine for starters when you're stationary,
and he's a big fucking lad, fucking, I can't remember his name, I don't know if it was nine or something.
But I've gone out, I've tapped the window, and he's just looked at me, I went,
turn it off or fuck off.
He's like, what? I went, right, look at the fucking time.
Turn the engine off or fuck off.
I mean, if he would have got a car in there, he would have smashed me up,
because he wouldn't go around with all that fucking crew and that,
so he could have easily fucking got some others around to film me in as well.
But yeah, he fucking pulled off the drive and fucking well-spin down the road and all that.
And I'm like, what for that? I only fucking draw me copper turd.
I don't know, it's a fucking, what, cause any drama or anything,
but I absolutely, I say, it's not fucking half-full, I'm fucking something more or something.
No, no, you've only four.
The amount of times you've come around and fucking boot the fucking door in just so we can fucking get him.
Cause there weren't together, but you know, he fucking behind on a session,
come back and draw him fucking, have his bike in the van,
amount of times he was fucking beat or up and all that and all that.
Cause the ones on was at work, and he was fucking booting in the door and that,
so Irvin and the kids hopped over and fucking came into our house.
Yeah, I don't know if he's fine.
Well, you only remember it because fucking the kids had my biscuits.
Left two as well though, more just leave two biscuits.
Finish them off?
Yeah, finish the pack up.
Like, I didn't want to say.
Yeah, it's just fucking stupid.
You don't want to dig your daddy in there?
I didn't even eat them.
When you put your hand in?
No, but it wasn't even that, it was left on my fucking chair.
Yeah, the pub's, it's done that on its own.
I didn't even eat them, I just chucked them in the back.
Came into your house, took your biscuits, left two, well there was that bourbon.
There was a while of bourbon greens, yeah.
Okay, I don't know what we're being packed.
Was that a printable?
Fucking grease, man.
Eat them up, you skeet.
But yeah, so, fucking, I'll tell a neighbour if I have to, but yeah, just can't be asked.
There's no need for fucking being noisy and that.
Yeah, there's no car, there's no...
Especially when it's happened consistent, though.
It is consistent, fucking.
I don't think he works.
I've never seen his blog at the house, it's just fucking, every now and again, I'll say I'll fucking put the bin out.
So, she definitely doesn't work.
I know it's fucking a rented product, but still, fucking, you know, surely there should be a bit of a background check to make sure that nothing is out of the piece.
I hate to say what it's fucking all coming in so...
Could be spotless, mate.
I'll douse it, mate, I'll douse it.
Could be a bit stinking, though.
I remember fucking getting back from walking the dog the one day as well.
And he's asking me if I'd drop my torch in his garden.
No, mate.
Use the torch on my phone most of the time, I don't own a torch.
He's like, isn't it your torch?
No, not my torch.
Fuck you, don't have a torch.
I'll put it in my garden.
I don't know how you've got a new garden, mate.
Not my torch.
You know, maybe someone from the school behind has thrown it over, or maybe it's the fucking neighbour.
Maybe they've been trying to look for him.
Even if I put more head over the fence, I wouldn't be able to see into his living room because we've got that sort of bell-shaped extension.
But he's never been about all of the map.
So I don't know why we thought it was mine, but no, mate.
I don't want to keep you fucking...
And I'll see him sometimes.
He drives from Aisle of the Bands round the corner to his mate's water park, which you can walk in two minutes.
But he'll drive round there, and then I saw him in the summertime, and we're fucking playing cricket in the garage.
And I was like, you drive from round the corner to play cricket.
Fucking just walk it, do you walk around?
Fuck you.
Girls with fucking neighbours.
So I think on that bum-shelve, I'll need another fucking drink.
So if we call it there.
And yeah, just a reminder then, any emails, questions, thoughts on the show or anything, open ears, send them in.
Realtor podcast, Gmail on the Twitter and all that as well.
And hopefully you've enjoyed that. It's been another bit of a rambling arm, fucking all sorts of random sheets again.
But that's what we're going to do, you know, until you start sending in questions, ask us, give us topics that you want us to speak about.
And I'll probably try and get cancelled from some of the situation, which is surprising.
We haven't actually done anything as far as I know this episode.
Fuck Sam Smith.
He's a prat.
There we go, yeah? Cancelled now then, have we?
I hope you enjoyed it. See you next time.