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Come home, it's coming home
It's coming, football's coming home
Well, get used to that everyone
Because that's all we're gonna hear on the radio
For the next three weeks at least
Yeah
Wow, three weeks a bit of a push, is he?
Semi-finals?
No, I think that's about right
Welcome back to the real talking podcast everyone
We're your host Ash and JD
But yeah, after that, no you won't hear it
Two of us
Well, they might play for the Nations
National League, Nations League?
Nations League, yeah
Yeah, they might play for that
That's a shit competition
You know, I was actually getting a little bit
Exhausted earlier, you know, it's
It is D-Day for starters, it's the
European football and you know, I'm so glad
We've got some competitive football back again
Because I know the Friendlies are on
But it's just dead, isn't it?
It's bad football, it's not worth watching it
Everyone's like playing moving themselves
Because they don't want to get injured
So I've got that
And then there has been injuries, there's call-ups
For other teams and that, but you know
We're not a footballing podcast, so we're not
Going to keep going on about it
But I am looking forward to just
When I do finally get home to Nox
After all this running around
Sit there with an old cold one
Watch Germany and Scotland
And yeah, I mean by the time
Everyone starts listening to this
Tomorrow when he's out
They'll know the results
But then again, you know, McTominay
Larks have come up with a little head of
Mirror and Air, don't they?
No, yeah, Germany, they've got to win it
They've got to win it, being the home nation anyway
Because they can't get away from it
Because they can't get embarrassed by
Our northern neighbours
But yeah, it's
It's finally
I'm not excited thinking
That England are going to do well or anything
But I'm just excited to be able to watch them
Football again
I mean to be fair
It will lead me into
A
Favourite little correspondent
James
James was excited this week to be fair
He's emailed to us
Send your emails in on
TheRealTalkingPod at gmail.com
Or you can send the Whatsapps in
07 470 488 096
Got it in one this time
Done my homework this week
But I'm not sure I had that in my head
You know what, it took me
It probably took me about four of yours
To get my number off my heart
You know some people can see your number
And just block you that number
Well I've had the same mobile number myself
I've probably got like 15
That's awesome, I'd be a bit
Worried with myself if I couldn't remember that number
I remember one of the lads numbers
And I won't say
It was 079
I'm not going to say all of it
777 7777
And it's like the most
Easiest number to remember
Some of them are though
I don't know if it's like an ADHD thing or autism or something
Autistic
Numbers just look like
A noise pattern in your head
And don't you think like when people still have home telephone numbers
I mean going back a bit
That was easier
I remember mine
My nan's
I even deleted all the contacts
In my phone the other day
And I had your home on the inside didn't I
So yeah that'll be the second one
I remember
It must have been that number
But yeah
0121 243 8753
It's not the same home number
Where I live
Where ever it's still my sister's home number
Feel free to try and give me a ring
No one's shiny day
I'll leave it right
Nah nah
You get called every now and then son
But yeah
It was just the pattern of that
Anyway because obviously
0121 being the area code anyway
But just the way it works
On the keypad
It's easy to remember
Yeah it's mad
I do find that
Now you said about the keypad thing
Because obviously with the gym
And stuff at work
You just do it by touch you don't look
Yeah
Because again with the Playstation
You can have a pin code on that as well
So even though I know the number
You have to press triangle, square, up, down
Or whatever
Corresponding to the number that it says on there
It's the same pattern all the time
So after a couple of times you turn it on and off again
I know that pattern automatically now as well
But yeah
It's just
So even
I was on the phone with Virgin this morning
Complaining about my internet
Because I'm not happy
But as they've asked for the secret
Password
Which isn't secret because when I set up with them
The chap on the phone asked me to
Set up a password
At least anyone
As well as everyone else that looks to be okay
But while on the phone
They asked for three digits
Of it and you have to press
The number with the corresponding
Letter so for us that's easy
Because we used to have to do the old
Texting so it was
Just randomly popped in my head I wonder how many
Younger generations
Struggle with that not knowing what
Letter is for each number
Do you remember how
Some people how quick some people
Used to text like that
For B was like
A twice
Two twice
One was
Just for
No one was just for voicemail
You had to press and hold one for voicemail
And then
If you get your keypad up
On your phone now
It should
Probably won't if you're not actually on a phone call
Oh no yeah it does have it
So number one is
Just for voicemail
And then
Hatch is hatch
Zero
I'm sure zero had the other ones though
Not your question mark and stuff
But yeah
Each number represents a letter
I still think it's weird
How like if I was to say to you like
How would you pick up the phone you would do the old
Yeah you know
That's it and then like
It's style would just go like that
And I'd like to hold a brick
On a thing or hold some flat
It's just yeah
Yeah
And I've seen the videos
Where they're getting shown an old cassette tape
And they're trying to press
Buttons on it that don't exist
And the one where they're like
How do you
Take pictures you would pretend to have one of those
Old disposable cameras and click the top
As where now they've got a phone
And pressing the button
Yeah taking a selfie
Let me take a selfie
What a horrible sign that was
Yeah they really have
So yeah James has emailed twice
He was excited this week
So at first
So it was on the response of
England's losing
In their last friendly
So he literally just says
England is shit they will struggle to get out of the group stage
I actually
Agree because I actually don't think this is going to be
An easy tournament for England
I can imagine them being a because there's a bit of pressure on them now
Yeah there definitely is after
The two lacklustre performances
And add that on to the expectation
That they're going to do well which
That can't be helpful
Well even after the Iceland game
You know you hear it on Torxport
And Skysports and all that
That they're still expecting them to be
Favourites and
I'm looking at
Because I didn't sit there and watch all the games
It was made from highlights and
There wasn't really much on the highlights to watch to be honest
But it is hard to go off
Them because everyone
Is playing within themselves because no one
Wants to stick
A leg out or to snag
And be injured
So it is hard to go off there
But yeah I just think
Just England
Be great for them to win something
In their lower times
Yeah it would be nice if we actually get to see
Do you remember the buzz
When he was in school and he used to be able to
Watch the games in school and that
Especially the one in South Korea Japan where he was in the morning
Yeah because
He was always a PE teacher wheeling in the
TV
So yeah come on let's watch this then
Well it was just the lads that were excited
Back then women's football
I don't even think it was a thing
Back then but the girls definitely
Weren't excited about it anyway
They probably just sat there playing with the Barbies
Or something
Talking about hairstyles or whatever
But yeah we enjoyed it anyway
We had a good old days
So yeah I think England
Will struggle with the group stage
But I think
It's interesting because
If England finished second
In the group and Germany
Topped their group
Will play each other in the next round
So yeah I mean
Going off of that form then if Germany
Finished top then I'd say their
Favourites would go throughout the round of 16 then
Against England
But
It's football anything can happen
We could end up getting a shock and seeing
Austria win the tournament you just never know
So yeah
It's all saying this
I was over my head this morning
I'm looking forward to it
Just football just love it
So yeah James is
Excited about it
Then his second email
Can't wait to see
How low you know as you finish next season
After keeping ten hard
That was a bit of a strange one
Because everything I've read
Was he was gone
And then he'd done a contract extension
So he's up his contract for
Three years or something like that
Yes and I've added an extra two on so he's
Gone a year than he's got
I just think it's been weird the way that
Ineos have done this whole strategic
Review of the season
Because it was
Meant to have been before they came
Into place
At Christmas with their
Purchase of 25% to the club
And then
To just drag it on after the
FA Cup because apparently he was going to get
Back and then obviously he won and
He changed the mind
I actually think he was going to get
Replaced but they couldn't get
The right person to replace him that's what he feels
Like to me
I think it's down to money because it would have cost
Around ten million to sack him
And then if
Deserby
Was going to take the job they still would have
Had to have paid the release calls
For Brodton even though
They'd left on mutual
Agreements
And he's just gone to Marseille now
Yeah
Two shell
He's apparently wanting to
Have a bit of personal time not want to take the job
Which is bonnets I think
That weren't going to give him the
Money that he wanted and
Then again the transfer budget and that as well
Potch, I'm glad that
He's nowhere near it
It just felt like they were going to wait
For Southgate to see what happened
With this England tournament
And I thought no I hope not
And I hope that if
There is a bit of a
Bad patch in the season
That they don't start throwing out
These links for Southgate again because
He wasn't good enough for Middlesbrough
He's not good enough for
A League One team I don't think
He hasn't got the coaches skills enough
Well hopefully he does well
For England
I'm not holding my breath for it
I mean regarding to United next season
Any way I think
As long as
We can sell players and get some
Good enough players in
They don't have to be world class even though
I'm seeing again this morning
Personal terms have been agreed with
Brown fight with Everton
So that's potentially going to happen
And players from Portugal
And this and that lot
So you know they do get some
Good players in
Yeah Tenarq's got all the
Chance to be able to do well
It's just getting the ones with
A bad attitude like I've said numerous
Times now so the logs of the Sanchos out
Of there and you know start getting
Players that actually want to play for the club
Because whether it's for
Him it doesn't matter
It should be any manager that's
In charge of the club
You know as long as they're playing for
The batch that's always the main thing
So hopefully
We do have a good season
But I mean
I think it's just deflecting from
Liverpool really
Do you think
As it stands
Before any transfers come in
Man you have a better season than
Liverpool
Again it depends on the injuries
Because obviously we saw
It not last season but the season before
Liverpool struggled with injuries and
You know they got the players back towards the end
They had a bit of a surge
But if you know
It can stay on top of them
Then yeah
I feel like
We'll be more pushing
Into the top four
Because Chelsea are on a reset
Again already obviously Liverpool
Are kind of resetting it just
Depends on how much Arn Slopp wants to
Change the style of play
If he tries to
Well if he keeps it more or less the same
As block then it shouldn't be an issue
They should be able to just sweep straight into it again
I know I've said it before
I've got a good feeling with Chelsea you know
Cesar
Honestly I don't know man
If they would have kept much
But they're changing
The manager again, it's a change of tactics
What players does he want to bring in
More disruption to the dressing room
But now I just feel
I don't know why
I just think they're going to have a good Cesar
I think you're going to have to put a barb on it in the book isn't it
Yeah
So when you say a good season though
You're breaking into the top four
No I actually think they're pushing for the Premier League
I know everyone's probably like
But I just feel
They've all had a season together now
I can't see it being
Like how they're going to ball like
20 new people again
When they get on the road
They kind of get on a little bit
Yeah
I do think they're going to push
But I think
They'll be in a better position
Definitely than they were last season
But I have a strange feeling
That they're going to do well next season
Yeah well I'm agreeing with the majority
And I just don't see it mate
I think you should put a barb on it
Because you think about it
I mean the right back, Rhys Jones
And left back's always injured
On their day
Really good, solid
They've got some players
And literally
Just getting that
Just that right coach
I can't remember his name
The old Leicester boss, the Italian geezer
Yeah
I should know because I've been reading up about him
Yeah and
I'm not going to even try to pronounce him
But
I just have a good feeling
Coming in early pre-season as well
Get his players in early once
Move on to the ones
I think they're going to move Lukaku on
Get some money for him
I can't believe he hasn't
Officially left
The last couple of years really
Just keep going on loan and loan
But I mean they'll sell a few players
I have a good feeling about them
I really do
I mean Cole Palmer
Yeah
He's only going to get better
Well you'd assume he's only going to get better
Yeah you'd imagine so
He has done well enough
And the two lads in midfield
Kassad
And
Enzo
Yeah
He's Enzo
I think he has Enzo on his shirt
Doesn't he
Well we're not a football podcast
Yeah we're not a football podcast
I just feel like
A season like Gaelian's game are they going to really push on me
I know
I know what you're trying to say
But I just can't see
I really can't
I just think
There's something missing in there
I think it's at least a proper decent
Goal scorer
Like an Ivan Tony
They've needed that
I feel like
I've seen that in my graph
Ivan Tony as well
Yeah I mean
He just wants to get out of Brentford really doesn't he
And I feel like
It will more likely be
Another London based club
I don't know what Arsenal is not going to go for to be honest
I think Arsenal are as well
Him and Ali Watkins
Yeah well no one's going to be able to get
Watkins away from Villa because they're going to want
At least 100 million
Which I don't blame them
He's had a good season
I mean
It's going to be a hard transfer
Just because of the Euros as well
The players that are in the tournaments
They're not going to want to do anything for
The next couple of weeks really
So
Yeah it's going to be
I think because
You tend to find that as well after a tournament
It sort of damages the start of the season
Yeah because obviously the players
That have gone far in a tournament
Don't really integrate with the squad
From the second game in or something
Yeah because they have a couple of weeks off
And they're going to have a holiday that they've already missed
And that as well so
Yeah it's
I mean that could be beneficial
To the likes of a Chelsea
On that sense then
Sterling's not gone
No
Rich James not gone, Chilwell's not gone
Honestly
I'll put a tenner on
Yeah you get to the bookies
I mean does it work the same as horses
Where you put it as each way or something
Yeah so each way is like
You can do it so they have to finish like
I think 20 points off the top or 10 points
Something like that
So maybe it should be
So I used to do Birmingham, skip
Not to win the league, we used to allow 20
So you never won any of that
No I just lost
Because you never know
No yeah yeah
Because there was that one person
At better or less than all those girls
But yeah
I don't know
Whether it might be better to go for a point
So if you can bet
That Chelsea would get
I don't know say 85 points
Or like
If there's like a variation or something
Maybe that would be a
One to go for, I mean I can't see them getting 85
Points but
I just have a good feeling mate
Yeah I think you should do it then
Just put that
I just don't want Man City to win it
Well no one wants them to win it
Yeah
I mean again because of
Them pouring the lawyers to sue the
Premier League, that's just going to
Drag their charges out longer
But I did see the other day
That apparently
The one that had the decision or
Another hearing to do with the
115 in November
It's our play for the season, why are you leaving it
So late, do we? No
When there's no football going on
Well no premiership going on
Someone's going to get
Loads of backhanders from it
And it will just all get swept
Under the oil rug
But really how many?
I was going to say to myself
But I better not, I don't want to get cancelled
Kid
I'm a racist
I'm going to first off
Man City that is
Not foreign people
Even though some people in general
Could do with being told to fuck off
Right so
As I say we're not a football podcast
We're going to leave the football talk from there
But always appreciate you James
Let us know how you think
That Liverpool are going to do
How does he feel about the manager
Yeah, do you
Think that you're going to win the league?
Because I heard that Trent
Mavigan's round Madrid
I've not seen that league
Contracts up next year
Yeah so they need to sign him on
Or let him go then
Yeah
I don't know
Yeah
Liverpool I don't look at their
Transfer news much to be fair
Now I've tried to have a
Broad range, try and see
What's going on all around really
I haven't just not seen much about Liverpool
But yeah
Let us know what you think is going to happen mate
We'll see from there
Now
As we briefly touched on
Last week with our
Dinner party little segments
We'll have to do like a little, well
Get a little jingle made up for this or something
But
So I have
Keep sending in suggestions
For different scenarios and whatever
That you already have
Because I'm starting to make a separate folder
For these suggestions
The first one that did come in
Was a dead or alive party
For people that you would not
Want to have at this dinner party
Or events
With yourselves
Now
You came up with the idea
After I'd already had this
Email as well
Yeah that was pretty strange because I remember when we
Called you on the phone I was like yeah we should do
A dinner party that we wouldn't want to have
Yeah
You've got yours
You haven't done it dead or alive
You've just done it all alive
Yeah just alive on this one
And then maybe if we do another one in the same style
People are dead so
Well because I've done a mix with mine
So
On the next one
Whether it's next week
Next one of people that we
Wouldn't want I'll do it as all alive
And you do the mix on that one there
So
Yeah
We'll start off with one each again
We'll keep it the same
So at the start of the night
Amy Wynos I would not want her there
No she'd be a fucking
Nah because she'd be wanting to get on the gear and that
And I'm not into that kind of thing
Yeah but you don't know unless you try
But I've tried some mix
I've tried the old Martin
Powder it wasn't for me
And yeah so
I'm just saying the night I was with my Amy Wynos
Could be like the start of a good night mate
Nah
I just want to have a
Have a seat somewhere
Music playing, get on the beers
Just take it easy
Not be fucking running around
At a raid
Getting a strap around your arm and poking a needle
Full of heroin into it
I just want to have a
Fun time
Not a crazy time
Yeah
So yeah that's more
Start of the night one that I do not want
It's funny how you went for a singer
I'm gonna also go for a singer
Madonna
Always fucking hated this woman and I don't know why
Because she just got crazy
And she's always tries to be young
And seductive
Fucking hench now, hench ya
I never loved the songs
Any one of them
I just never got out
Of my 80s bangers
No no
I loved the one that they used for deadball
To a degree but
Just basic mate
Compared to the Alice of the time
I feel Collins
What you're saying is
As and when there's a Madonna hologram
Concert you're not gonna be
No no
Nah I get it
She is a bit of a fucking nutcase to be fair
So moving on to the middle
So because I've sort of planned mine
The way these guests are
I've just gone like
Progressively worse for me
Yeah so this gets worse
So I'm at this dinner party
Whatever Amy Winehouse is already on the session
She's fucking going for it
And so out comes
Pee didda
And I'm like nah
All these people are drugged off
And I'm not going into the party
I'm not going into a room
And getting bombed by Pee didda
I'm not all about that big mill lodge
It's not for me
So yeah I'm not happy
Amy Winehouse is cracked up
Pee didda is fucking
Trying to get me to sign on for a record deal
Just so I can suck his cock and I'm like nah
I'm not doing it
So yeah that's my first two then
So my second one
Beaver
Imagine him trying to swallow stuff while you're fucking
Scranning
It's just a sausage honestly
Yeah I know
He keeps popping up on the beat again
So he saw the girl that he's weaving
He's essentially
She's doing her own thing
She's getting fucked by other men
And recording it
He's taking the cock and going
Nah mate
With me it's like how we started out
Where he is
I only really noticed him on the TikTok
And then I think later on
When he was kind of like
When people started taking him
He started to go outside to know about him
Every comment on TikTok
He's either just calling him gay
Literally I see him like one was gay
Or you fuck up
Do you know why the gay one is done?
Because apparently she's transgender
She's just a bit butched
Well now you're thinking about it
I don't know if it's true
It's just from one of her videos
She was kicking off about comments
With people calling her like a man
And trans and whatever
And then it was this other lad
I don't know what the podcast was
But he started off
Singing a song
And then whatever he said
Was something about having a cock
And he's like yeah but you've got one anyway haven't you?
And then because she's pulled her face
As if to say I'll fucking punch you right now
He's like
Swayed off it and gone
It's cool though
You own that shit
If that's how you are
Literally I saw that 20 seconds
And they went to carry on talking
I just swiped off
I don't mind him on my sleeve
Because his teeth just keep getting more turkey teeth
And he's always seems to be getting further and further apart
Yeah it's definitely getting spread
The one thing I can't stand
Is
So when people start getting ready
And they start getting successful
They talk
And all I ever seen
Now is talking about money
Like I seen him how
He was talking about
I think it was a Burberry set
He's a short and short
I think I've seen that
So yeah
It's literally
Him I just fucking
I couldn't stand him because he's turned into a
He's always seemed off
But he just seemed like a total prick
Like a fucking
But he's got to stay relevant
Because when he's not relevant
There's going to be no income and you have no money
What he's doing is not sustainable
In terms of
Longevity
That's why he always has to think of new things to be relevant
Because he's not relevant
From his own personality
He's not keeping relevant
It's the shit that he does
So yeah
I have a feeling our number 1's could be the same
I don't know
If you've got the same as me
Plus mine's dead
No I think you might hate
My one more than you're going to hate
This one
So as I say
Mine's still a part of what they say
Party thing that I don't want to be at
So Amy Winehouse cracked
He did his plumbing people now
Because he's going off the back
Of Amy Winehouse's
Drug induced start of the night
To top it all off
To sweep up
And get all the afters
And all the rest of it
That he used to do
Jimmy Savile
Because it being his element
Apart from no kids there
Well saying that
Diddy does a lot when young
But yeah
Just Jimmy Savile
Taking everything
Amy Winehouse and BD
Jim's definitely going to fix that
He'll be fucking fixed up
Right off the trace
Now then, now then
Just walking around with his shiny
Gold tracksuit
I never got to use tracksuits
His tracksuits were always fucking dodge as well
Yeah but it just screamed Peter Pan in me
In hindsight
Obviously I'm getting the word
Nuts
Yeah so
It would be
The horrible cake
And yeah no doubt
Just carry on with the raping
We did it, you know
He'd love it
That would be his ideal party to be fair
I mean the only thing that would make it better for him
Is if it was in a hospital
So that
That was my three
Unwanted guests
Number one for me, Sam Smith
Sam Smith
Well I can't have him on my list
No I can't
I don't know if I have to explain why
But
When you're crying outside a mansion
During Covid
And it was so staged
Do you remember this? Yeah
And I remember Piers Morgan
Absolutely tearing it off, absolutely ripping into him
It was where everyone else could come work
And you know was struggling and going on furlough
You know earning 70% of the money
This guy's crying outside
He's 7 million under mansion
That is totally fake
Because he's either crying
And his mates went
Oh let me take a picture
Or he's set up to the point where he's like
I'm gonna cry, take a picture
I could force out tears
And let's do something
And then from where he's gone to
I just need gender
And the way it seems
Now you can be whatever
You want to be
And expect everyone to just accept it
I feel this vibe came from him
He definitely didn't help
Any of you know
The last pictures I saw of him the other week
So I think he'd lost
Probably like £30
Not at his wallet
But weight wise
So he'd lost a little bit of weight
He was still on the beach with his red
Budgie smugglers on, the old Speedos
His
Beard
Was just a bit untimed, he was short
Just not looking good
And again it was a sad face
I'm like mate
You're on the beach in the sun
In your Speedos
Why are you sad? Who's sad on a beach really?
I don't know
I mean he done my head in that much
Didn't even want to bring it up on the podcast when I saw him
I probably should have done
But yeah
I agree that
I wouldn't be able to put it in my mind list
Can you imagine my heart trying to be
Intentional all the time
Like these Teletubby boots crying
Nah, nah
Yeah
That's horrible lists
Yeah
I can't wait to see
Your mix list when that comes around
Yeah
Be it the next episode or in a couple of weeks
Maybe don't want to try and
Do the same ones all the time
But yeah I'm definitely going to have to remember that you put him on yours
So I don't want to put mine
I mean
To be fair it's just as easy
We could always do
One that we don't want
For each scenario
That we do one day before and there's that many
Cons out there
Speaking of
Nah there's no more on the
Correspondence, we've already spoke about James
No but we will get on to
Some more messages
So
Email from Kirstie
On the realtalkingpod.gmail.com
So she
Has said hi guys
Hope being a daddy is going well
Obviously she's talking to you here now
Will we ever get a baby guest appearance
Well
Sometimes I'm surprised
You haven't heard her because sometimes she's
Crying in the background
But I don't know actually
I think maybe when she's a little bit older
Running around and that we're not going to
Really be able to start from coming and
Interrupting
Me and my partner have this thing where she's too
Nice, she smiles at everyone so that everyone feels
That they can come and speak to us
Because she smiles to everyone
I know what you're saying because I have this
Dog
Sometimes
Sometimes when you
Just want to
Just be a part of yourselves and
For everyone
And you start doing that and you both just walk around
With headphones on
What I will say I think probably
I'm going to go yes
Only if the fact is
Obviously my partner is back at work now
So there will be times when we do the podcast where I might have to
Have her
Drawing the podcast
That will be fine
She'll just be laughing
Just kicking
Just mumbling and whatever
So yeah it will be fine
So yeah we probably will do
At some point no doubt
Rob
There is a couple of things that I
Well messages from last week
As well that I forgot to get on to
So I am just going to quickly
Do well not quickly but I'm just going to go
Back to them first
Before moving on to other ones because I'm trying to do
Them in an order
So question from last week
Was from Roly, what's something
That sucks about being a man
Now I've got one
It's getting hit in the balls mate
Because that hurts
And it's the worst pain I've ever known
Yeah yeah yeah
Now I've got a different
Group with me
So I don't want to gloss over it because we have
Spoke about that before and it definitely
Is up there one of the worst
Things to ever happen
Because even just seeing another man get kicked in the bollocks
Or even talking about it you feel that little
Hurt and it's just like
I've got my dreams down there
But
So I've gone down a different route
So because
The work that I do
I'm always out and about and as I say
Out walking the dog
He's drawing your attention all the time
So for me
It's not the awkwardness of
Not being able to speak to kids
And if you do speak to the kids
It's again we're touching the gym
So
So in customer's houses
I feel weird
Not that I do
But say hello to the kids
If they're about to go out to school
Or whatever
And then if I'm out walking the dog
Because again a lot of the kids want to come over and give them a fuss
And I feel awkward as if to say
If anyone else is looking at me
Are they thinking I'm bringing this dog
As if he's a bag of sweets
And I'm enticing them over or something
And I feel like if I was a woman
It doesn't matter
Because that's still the
You would assume they don't think yes
Yeah because it's the old social normality
Of women, of mothers
And the child bearers
And all that so they're not going to be
A predator
Whereas being a man
It's like those kids are all around you
I tell you another thing
As well actually
Is
I can't imagine
Having
A bunch of lads together
And not getting slagged off
Or having an honest
Chat
I think it is manioc
Because I can't remember
The last time I haven't got slagged
Why I'm not in terms of foot
You know when you go out
Essentially
When there's three or more with our group
You can't just have a general dog
Yeah he's working
As a baby I was always treating you
And all that it's always
What you do you're dicked
An example of this is
One of our mates had skin cancer
And
So one of the other lads went to him
Look man you've
Put a bit of a wire on and his response is
What because I had skin cancer
And I felt sorry for myself
And the other reply was
I'm sorry you had skin cancer look at me I've got skin cancer
Look
He could have meant that
But he didn't
I think that's the hardest thing he's just
Trying to communicate something
More than a jokey level
Well again it brings me
Back to the memory of when one of the other lads
Tried
Topping himself off
And it was literally
The next day all
Jumping on slagging my phone
You couldn't even do that right you fucking shit geezer
Yeah
So that night was a weird night
So we went to the hospital
And he had some of the other lads there from his
Other group of friends like getting upset in the hallway
Yeah
And then I remember walking in with two other lads
And then he was like not you
Guys
Yeah from there literally
But it just I suppose
Even in that moment he probably didn't need
Or slagging but I don't know if it helped
Or all it felt like it would have helped
But only because
That's how we've always been with each other
Because everything's always out in the open
And there's
You know there's no arguments or anything
Because we're not happy with each other
And he still gets slagged for that
Well
I think for like three years solid
It was like ah he's a
Hot vodka and a paroxy animal
I remember one of the things was like
He didn't even want to go out in store and use
Glen's vodka
And I'm sure that there's people sitting there watching
While listening to this now thinking
What is wrong with them
His last one wanted to be a Glen's not like a
Spar and awful whatever you know
Grey goose
Eight pound look a wonder shot
Probably even less than that back then
Three pound bitter
So yeah maybe that
On a series no more
Yeah not being able to be
Sorry
I cannot think that's our age group as well though
I've got one
Making new friends
I struggle
Now I find it really awkward now
Now I haven't made no new friends
Since school
100%
And I've had like people that I've started speaking to
And it's like do you want to come to the pub
And I always go no no I'm busy
Even though I'm not like isn't it generally nice guys
I think if it was a different
Question because you're not much of a drinker
No no but it's like
That's where ideally you'd want to
Do it early
Yeah yeah but like can you imagine
What else would you do
Where it wouldn't be
It'd have to be like obviously everyone goes for beers
Any of us would just like oh
One of them was like nice guys
Do you want to go to blues
Do you want to come for
Beer after
I was just like when
So it might be
Maybe make new friends maybe
So I don't have that problem
Again because of meeting new people
All the time
But like new friends though
So I was going to go on to be
Only no not previously
But I've got a new
Polish friend who lives around the corner from me
And he's the typical
Man thing as well so I've seen because he's got
Dogs
So I've seen him out walking the dog and that
And then just out and about
And I've seen a lot
But it's the typical man thing
We don't even know each other's names
But as soon as we see each other
We're like oh yeah so how you doing
And he knows where I live
And roughly where he lives
And yeah we're friends
And I don't know if he's got more friends
That live near us or anything
But yeah we just see each other out and he's like
Yeah so and I am
Getting close to saying mate do you want to go for a beer
And I'm sure he'll say yes
I guess I'd say no then that would be awkward as well
But again I don't know if he's a drinker
I assume so because he's Polish
I don't know if he is
The only thing
Because he's Polish
It's like saying the Irish
All Pani's another drink
Which again you do
Yeah so don't make an ass out of me
But
The main reason why I haven't asked him yet
Is because he works night shifts
And it's a lot of different shift patterns and whatever
Not days that he does work nights
I hope that makes sense but yeah
So because I don't know his work schedule
I can't say a lot
Yeah you're off Tuesday do you want to go grab a beer
Because yeah I don't know that work schedule
But yeah I'm going to ask him soon
Enough anyway
But yeah I've met his kid
His son's the same age as yours
Well your daughter not your son
Or have you got a son we don't know
Nah I actually didn't play them games back then
Yeah
So they were born around the same time
His sons had similar issues
Like the colic and all that as well
And yeah
Like I saw him the other day
Look chunks there now
Putting on all the weight which you want it with babies
You don't want them looking skinny or anything
But yeah
He's a good lad
I remember a couple of years ago as well
I don't know
Where we've been the night before
It was my birthday weekend as well
So we would have all been out
Somewhere and then I don't know
Southside at yours or the Premi
Or something
Then I got back home the next day
And I've gone back to the pub
Met one of the
Another mate that I had
Beers with him
He's late
And I started chatting to these other lads
And again because we both had drinks
It was always best mates and everything
And yeah
I got his number
I messaged him a couple of weeks later
I was like, you know what mate, want to go for a beer?
And yeah he was busy then
So he didn't have to go for a bit
But yeah
Just because of what I do
I'm just
Easy enough to make new friends
But yeah I think
It is kind of just a man thing
Again you make your friend group
When you're in school and that's it
You're out moving
I mean again because I moved away from everyone
Really as well and it's so
If I do want to have much of a social
Off I kind of need local friends
And I don't
Have neighbours that I can just
Go
Of the same age anyway
To just come round
Yours or you know
To have a lot of beers or something
With a defence panel like council staff
There's nothing wrong with that
Yeah so
I think I kind of needed to do that
If I did want to have a social off
Which I did, it was easy you know
So yeah
I think that's a
Well answered question
Probably one of the best answered questions
Yeah with about 10 different answers
And
The note that one of our mates tried to kill
Himself and a friend had cancer
Yeah
They're all well these days
Still not bad but you know we can't help that
And then
So another question from Jess
Would you rather have
More time or more money
Now I've said
For years there's not enough days in a week
Or weeks in the year
Or hours in a day
I usually say it better than that but
Yeah there's never enough time
To do everything that we want to do essentially
But for me
I'd rather have more money
Yeah and I feel like you don't have enough time
Because you're always working
So take that as the equation
And add money
You've got more time to do what you want to do
You've got a shit load more time so
Definitely more money on that one
Yeah and yeah if it meant I didn't live
As long because I've got all the money
I'm sure I'd be happy living less time
But you know if you knew when you were going to die
Would you want to find out
Because say like you might need like
Five years would then
Yeah I don't know if we had this as a question before
Did we?
Because
I know
If you know how you're going to die
But you still can't really prevent it
Unless it's like a disease
You know if it's from getting hit
By a car
You can't just stay in the house
In terms of since like if you knew
You was going to die no matter what
Like that guy
He was going to just heart attack
Yeah
Would you want to know?
Or not?
Well I think in general yeah
Because you'd be able to tie up all the loose ends
And I mean
And make the most of what you've got there?
Yeah well initially you think
Right I've got X amount of savings
I'm going to fucking spend it then
There's no point
Leaving it
Unless well again I've got no kids
I'm also
But again fuck the kids
Not in the Jimmy Samuels way
They could look after themselves
Jesus man
So yeah in general yes
The answer is more money
And then
The last one from last week
Miles sorry that I did forget about you
But he asked
Have we managed to get back into gaming again?
If so what we played?
So no
I finished with the gym now
In terms of my diet plan
He's just wanting to get fat man
No I'm not
I'm definitely not trying to do it
It took too long mate
But no I'm hoping now
That I'm not going to be as active in the gym
I say this because
When I get up at 5 o'clock in the morning to go to the gym
I'm asleep at 8 o'clock
I don't want to sleep at 7
I'm in bed fry
So it's something
That I still want to get into
But not as yet
Well I know
Obviously you've been getting into it a little bit
Yeah so I've finally finished
One of the games
Of the Trails of Legends
No Legend of Heroes
Saga
Because I wanted to get that finished
Because the next game is
In a
Couple of weeks time
And then I've still got
Final Fantasy games to
Play which I want to play before
Getting onto another different cyber
Games again
So yeah finished the one
Started playing Final Fantasy 7
Remake again so I want to play that
First before getting onto the second instalment
Do you, here's a question
Do you play games
In terms of just the player
Because I find it hard
To really enjoy games
I have to be committed to the game
It has to be my kind of game
Just to play
Or is it to the point where you've played
And I don't know 10 hours in
So you're not finished but you're 10 hours in
So you're going to finish you
No I have done that with a lot of games
Where I've just been playing it in port now
I can't be arsed
There was one
Kuno, Nisam
I don't know
A little RPG game
And again yeah I probably played all 20 hours of that
Actually no sorry
I played the first one
That was okay so I played the second one
Wasn't feeling it so yeah
Probably was like 10, 15 hours whatever
I can't be arsed
Yeah
Because
Because then the games
Start to feel like a grind then
So for me
The games have to hit a criteria
Where
It's got a good storyline
It's not to as I've mentioned before
You know you have to do your own meals
I fucking hate all that stuff
It's just like it's not real
I get it we've read Redemption
Because it's that way of life
You playing that character
It's the story
When you can set up camp
And make sandwiches
I was just like fucking hell
Like just not no
Yeah I don't get too involved
Into the game to that extent
Because you do that
For a lot of these games anyway
To get the trophies
I don't need an online trophy cabinet
I just want to play the game enjoy the story
Yeah no you're right
And I spoke with this with you the other week
Where I said when I play Pokemon I always try to get
The best
Natured one with the best ability
Even though I'm not playing competitively
And I'm easy going to piss for the game
But I will literally
Grind
Looking for like Route 2
Looking for the best version of that one
Wasting 20 poke balls on it
But there's no need because
When I get to route like 2 gym leaders in each draft
Yeah and
Unless you are
Playing it online
All the time every day
To make it worthwhile doing all that grind
It's just a waste of effort
So yeah
You've got to get that out of your head
And just start enjoying the game
I mean I know
I said it to you anyway but I feel that
Pokemon games, Scarlet and Borla
The story
Is not good enough to warrant
Going through that grind as well
So yeah just
Play get it finished and then move on to the next one
Yeah next is Star Wars game I want to start playing
I'm interested in getting it
I've not looked at
Getting into that to be fair
Yeah I've played a couple
Hours
Of Fond 27 again
Which
Is mad to be fair because I played it when it first
Came out completely
And then when I started playing it the other day
I was like shit I don't even remember this
Well fair enough right at the beginning
So I kind of got
Excited thinking what else have I
Forgot about the game then
So I'm looking forward to carry on playing it
That much work at the moment it's hard
It was only because I was working a night shift
That I was out playing for a couple of hours the other day
So yeah
I'll probably play it for a couple of hours
Sunday morning again
But otherwise nothing new
Game wise anybody miles
Yeah nothing new enough
I do feel like a lot of the games
And as good as they used to be I can't
It seemed like you could find them
When it was longer like the new games
Diving to get into it
But I feel like you just go after ones you know
Like fauna fancies
Like now you just stick to what you know
Because there's that many different games
Out there now that
It'd be hard to try and find something
New that you might like
That was why I was glad when I did find the locks of
These legendary hero
Sagas
Chronicles
Xenoblade Chronicles
Whatever it's called I don't know
It's out there good games anyway
I was gonna say the games too expensive now
For you not to like it
Like if you used to buy it you don't like it
It's like 70 quid now for a game
Yeah
I'll try and
Wait until there is a sale on for it as well
Because I've not done it for a little while
But I'd go through
Current offers, sales on or whatever
And then see something that is
Like 60 pound reduced down to 20 or something
Have a look
And then I'll buy it that way
I mean it's been that long since I bought
The second
So Final Fantasy VII Rebirth
That there's already a sale on it
And it's like half price or something
And I didn't actually look at the price
Just know there was a sale on it
And I bought it noteworthy because I'd be annoyed at myself
That I haven't played it and I could have saved my day
Yeah nothing
Noteworthy
So that's all I knew for the games
We are getting close to the hour mark
I do just want to
Get another one of
Questions in from the
Whatsapp
On the Royal Talking Hotline
07 470 488 096
So
Where was the question now?
No, they're all
What's wrong with you?
This is done into my favourite part
Of the podcast
So anyone that is new to the podcast
We do have our little segments
Of hey what's wrong with you
Where you've got a pet peeve or something
Someone's done your reading
A situation or anything
Does your reading
Then you just roll in
Email, Whatsapp, text message
Send it in, let us know
What's wrong with you all heading
So I will start off with
The first one from Joe
Joe has said
Got a
Whats wrong with you?
Oh no, it isn't that one actually
That is one that we did last week
That's me not looking at the messages properly
That was the big memoir
Oh yeah
It's a long one
It's all gone between emails and the Whatsapp
So Carl
Has messaged in with
British Webber
Oh well we spoke
We've said it before
We're not a Webber podcast
For a good two weeks
20 minutes was about the Webber
Today has been a mad one
Where I've been working to be fair
Pissing down, cold, dark
And suddenly I'm like fuck off
I get what you're saying mate
You just want to go to the clouds
What's wrong with you?
This is the time where you're online
And everyone's in Greece and Spain
Because I think they've had a bit of bad weather
But Greece, it looks fucking hot mate
Well yeah, because they are hot most of the time
Anyway
But I mean it's just that
And then you're knocking it's pissing down, cold
In June
Yeah, time of the year
We should have a bit of better weather really
But being cold
As I say, doesn't bother me
But that torrential rain that we had earlier
From out of nowhere, I'm drying the paints
Gone pitch black in the room
I didn't want to have the lights switched on
Because the ball was making a weird buzzing noise
It was doing my head in
So yeah, I feel your pain mate
If it's raining too much, we mow
If it's sunny too much
Or too hot, we mow
So yeah, British weather
I'll get it mate, get in the bin
Our next one is from Lee
Ordering a takeaway
From food being missing
Yes
Again, I feel your pain
Yes
You go first
No, I was just going to say, I get it
Because I'm on the phones right away
Because if it's just the or the little room
I want to do the chat room thing, it cracks me up
So I'll just ring the restaurant trail
So this fucks me off
I know we've Uber now, you can claim your money back
But it's not the fucking point
You know what we had once
Let me, one sec, because this is really important
Yeah, like that, if you can hear me
No one wears
Or from my thoughts
We have to palli not to pour
Oh, okay, so
So you wanted a Nike burger
And you just got a naked bun
I think it should have been a Big Mac
But he just come with the buns
Like literally
But I don't understand how that can happen
One, and two, you know, you work in a restaurant
Or a fast food thing
It's not that hard, it's on the list
Yeah, and this is what
Grieves me, because it is
It's all, it's printed up on the computer
And the ticket's there
And you should
Check it out for century
As they put it into the bag
I have a feeling that once
That you deliver a man comes and picks it up
From Uber or just eat
If it's not done, they just fucking dash it in there
But fuck it, it's half done, just have it
Yeah, they probably do
And you know what the worst one is for that
No straws
I don't know what that
I've not had that
I don't know what that fucks me off so much
But just having no straws, you know when you order McDonald's
It fucks me off
I've got, because the McDonald's paper straws
Can't stand them anyway
So I've got metal straws at home
So if I did get one
Well to be fair, I never really ordered one of them
But yeah, if I got one
There wasn't a straw, I wouldn't use it anyway
Metal straw
So you know when you order stuff for Uber Eats stuff
So when this food come in
Just no, like
Just literally a Nike burger
And I'm sure that was the one where
Uber Eats, then the day after
It was like, can you send a picture
It's in the fucking bin
Fuck me
You need to annoy him
I'll do
I actually
You know what, if that was someone else's
Order, why would
You have that like that
I know we weren't even someone else's
Order because we had what we should have had on the
On the receipt
Fuck me, I think they've got
Two other things wrong from that
It's
Too common
I appreciate that you do
Get the refund on it though
But I'd rather have the little
Mac and cheese bites that I've ordered
Because I'm still hungry
Another McDonald's one
This was McDonald's
It happened before
Charms you with McDonald's, fucking shit one to order from
Anyway
I called up and I was like
I've got my fucking food
And I was like, you can come down and get
If I come down and get it, my meal's going to be cold
Yeah, there was no point in me ordering
Before delivery
So I went down and to be fair to them
They've gave me a whole fucking
Basically my order again
They asked me what the order was, I told him
So we had like
But you just know the point
You would have just eaten up to fucking go there
Because you pay a bit more
I did have an
Old McDonald's years ago
It would have been after a night of heavy drinking
Standard weekend
Shenanigans
Ordered a McDonald's
Old school like, driving there
Driving through
I wanted like a
Double sausage and egg with muffin meal
And then probably an extra hash brown
Or something
And you know when you get to the second window
And they say, can you just go and park in the bay please
So why haven't you got 50 of them bad boys
Ready, Lord on the shelf
So I've gone over, parked up
And
So I already had my coffee
Handed to me, that was when it says
Park up and what about, so
I put my sugars in, and have a little sip of that
And then
The little chap's come over with the bag
And did it make for the window
I was all sound
Because I was about to head off to work
So I'm safe, fucking bag down on the seat
Started to drive off
So I opened the bag then
And there was literally
About three times the amount of food
Than what I'd ordered
So they'd give me the wrong bag
So someone else would have been sitting in that car
Someone wanted them to have a taste
Of one meal
Probably a whole family sitting in their car
And have just been given a single meal
And an extra hash brown
Why is it McDonald's
I don't know if I've told you this
So in the morning I get
A coffee from McDonald's
And I paid cash once on
Gave her a tenner
Which gave me change back for 20 quid
I fucking love those ones
It's great
I mean you're not going to have that
Aside from these days with everyone paying on card
Yeah I love it
I mean I
I don't know, whatever shop I was in before
I did have more change
Than what I was given originally
And I was like
No, you've given me the wrong change there
And they're thinking that I should be getting more
And they went to pull out more
No, no, no
You've given me change from a 20
I only give you a tenner
So essentially I'll give the tenner back or the five back
Whatever it was
Because I thought this person is going to lose the job
If they're doing stuff like this all the time
So at least on my conscience I'll give the wrong change back
You have to be polite sometimes
Well you do that
At a car
You've got good things that happen don't you
It never really does though does it
It never comes back
No, I mean yeah
We say that but then you've just got a
Big fucking bag of McDonald's actually
Well, yeah
I mean it has been bought a while
But
We have reached that
Over our mark
There is still a few more how what's wrong we use
We will
Get straight on to them next week
But we want you to send in more
We'll start off with it next week
I mean unless
It does turn into the football podcast
Again and we start rattling on about England
And how good or bad they've been
Most likely shit
But yeah keep sending them in
We've got a few more
So I would
Jess, Lauren
Yeah we've got
Got them from them so
We'll start off with them next week
We've got them from
0747 0488 096
On the Real Talking
Hotline
Send them on the emails
RealTalkingPod.gmail.com
Xcogitia, Ash and JD
All the links are always in the description
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