Hi everyone, welcome back to another episode of the Real Talking Podcast with your hosts
Ash and JD. So we've had a bit of an eventful week, well I've had an eventful week. What
we did forget is that I touched on Conspiracy Corner last week but then didn't do it because
we were too busy talking about Bluey and kids programmes. But that will start me off with
an email from Jess. It all links in, just bear with me a sec, I can see you nodding,
Lord come on what's going on Jack, get on with me. So Jess was asking, did we see the
solar eclipse and it was too cloudy where she is so she just saw a bit of a crappy glow.
So it was Monday I think it was, it was the 8th anyway, I remember it was the 8th. So
the answer is no, didn't see the eclipse. I know it was happening but too busy crafting
money, don't have time to stand outside and look at the sun. So what I'd forgot to say
last week was all the conspiracies of what was going to happen during the solar eclipse,
which yeah you're shaking your heads, you know that they're there mate. They can make
conspiracy out of anything can't they. Well what I didn't get leading up to it was how
many people can just pull these out of the hat saying that it's not a real eclipse, it's
you know a lot of it was flat earthers coming out with these bollocks. They never give an
explanation because going off the flat earthers where it's just two light bulbs essentially
above the dome, the sun and the moon, why would they overlap the light bulbs from time
to time for an eclipse. Do flat earthers think they're like in a Truman show? Essentially
yeah so the way the Truman show it was a big dome that you were seeing, that yeah it's
the same that we're under a big dome and so it's the thermomont is what it's called which
it's the reference in the Bible which will save that for another day. Which again, so
another one that I know we're gonna do this a lot to be fair going off on tangents but
so the letter J wasn't invented in the English language until I don't know it was something
like 1600s. Right. Yet the Bible's you know over 2000 years old so his name wouldn't have
been Jesus, it would have been Jesus. Jesus. You know so yeah so Jesus wasn't Jesus, Jesus.
But yeah so we're under a firmament and above that is water but then obviously we've got
water on the planet as well. There's that many different flat earth theories because
again have you seen any of them ones that when you go through the ice wall of the Antarctic
Circle. I've seen my way it's like the ice wall is the barricade keeping us all in or
something like that. Yeah so it's that and then if you go out of that there's other parts
of land over ice walls so there's like Valhalla and all the mythical worlds that you see on
films and all sorts of crap anyway. I want to know like it'd be interesting to know who
brought this hypothesis forward to say. They've got their evidence. Someone at some point
so there's a couple of books basically and so as they've read through the books it shows
the maps because apparently someone actually got through the ice wall you know I don't
know during Viking times or whatever so they've got through it and then the landscapes they've
made maps of everything else that's out there. You know again because that's why. And then
he managed to come back and show everyone. Yeah yeah so it's his map so we're assuming
it was a man most likely was. So we're assuming that this one man. I think there was several
but yeah. Don't assume that no other men have come before and then come back. Yeah. And
then no one's read since. No because there's all the major countries have got the Antarctic
Treaty haven't they? So you're not allowed to explore Antarctica. Yeah you're not. Which
I would think there is something going on there you know aliens maybe but I think it's
just majority down to health and safety essentially that if just any more billionaires wanting
to just go and explore in such extreme terrains where you know you don't want to take the
total time because it's never gonna last. We all know how that went. Do you think Jack
could have gone onto the door? I think so. Yeah well. She did hug a lot of the room on
the other end there didn't she? I love all those pictures where it's like a load of dogs
and that next to her on the door or there's like luggage and stuff. They just move over
and yeah. But yeah so I think that's the main reason other than what they're trying to hide
the aliens is that they just can't have anyone trying to just explore because they'll die.
You know the last thing they want is a submarine going down there as well. Another one to fucking
bite the dust. So yeah we'll come onto flat earth and extra realms and whatever and that
for another one. I'll get some videos for you to watch for the entertainment value.
Yeah so the solar eclipse conspiracies. So the Hadron Collider. So in Sweden I think
it is where the particle accelerator. Oh yeah yeah yeah. So we're gonna reboot that on the
8th and again this one video went into the bloody conspiracy. So apparently where that
is it's over the gateway to hell. I'll keep it brief. So it's over the gateway to hell
and so as the atoms or the neutrons are gonna collide or were gonna collide since we're
recording this after the 8th after the eclipse. So as the collide that was going to open the
gate to hell and all the demons like a scene from Supernatural were gonna come flying out
of the ground and the world was gonna end. You know the fore horsemen of the apocalypse
or something was gonna happen. Another one that it was gonna not be the moon eclipsing
the sun it was gonna be the mothership that's been floating out in orbit for a little while
now ready to start you know an invasion. I feel like there's been these things in the
past do you remember the year 2001? Yeah Y2K. And 2012 remember the world was gonna end
at some point in 2012 and then when it done happened there's nothing done. So this mothership.
Yeah because after Y2K we're like no no we've got to go off the Mayans calendar so it was
like four years later or something because well they weren't here just because the Mayans
didn't leave us. Right. There was probably more to it than that but yeah. It's just yeah.
And then there's like that Baba Duke or whatever who's got their predictions there's like a
whole book of it and you know people just seem to find their correlations to be like
oh there's gonna be a natural disaster in 2024. There's a natural disaster every year
you know so well just because there's something that they can half pinpoint to that prediction
of a sun 200 years going on. So yeah there was a lot of a lot of bullshit coming out
conspiracy wise because of this eclipse and then yeah the eclipse happened as I say we
saw nothing I think it was Jess sorry let me just double check. Yeah Jess saw a little
bit of a glow just because it was cloudy so I didn't see much. Because it was more America
that saw it in Canada and everything that part of the world because of where obviously
the time of day. Yeah I think for the UK it was going to be Ireland and Wales which was
like the best visible areas for it. Otherwise we just well as I say I didn't notice anything
but yeah it would have just been just a slight bit of a log as if the clouds covering the
sun slightly anyway that's all we would have potentially seen. But since the eclipse happened
anyway I've seen numerous videos where people are obviously on the best phones or cameras
ever because you're getting all the clearest pictures. Not. So the focus in at the sun
and again it's you can't even see that it's the eclipse behind these clouds but through
the clouds you can see shadows moving and there's a mix of them saying that it's demons
flying around because of the hadron collider opening up the gates to hell. Another one saying
it's aliens it's the the spaceships flying around from the mothership and this and that.
It's like no why would they choose an eclipse to start an invasion and why didn't anything
happen once the the sun and moon separated again? Like it was that 30 seconds in the
that's all I had yeah and it's like oh no we've got to go back again now. So it's just it's such a
a disappointment that there's so many people that come up with fairy tales and that essentially.
Yeah and I think it's quite sad that people believe it because it's just it's just nonsense
like if you were to say to me mate this is happening but it's because of this I'd be like
nah. Oh no it's uh it's not yeah let's say it's a shame but um speaking of nonsense it's a nonsense
going from one shambles to another. As is about the Undertake now. No no. The Undertake podcast.
The Undertake podcast sorry I thought you were saying the Undertaker because we've partially
watched Wrestlemania um which what again while it's there uh so Moels did a email in as well
asking if we've watched Wrestlemania uh I've only watched about five hours. Eight hours is a lot of
time to watch. Right so I always think like because these do the pay per views on a Sunday night.
Yeah. So Wrestlemania's over two nights but so I watched the first one the first night and then
obviously with it being Sunday night didn't watch it and then first thing went to work
when on my phone seeing pretty much everything so it's like I'm watching up there. Yeah I've
managed to avoid watching any of the TikTok videos of what's happened but it was literally
just a spoiler from listening to another podcast so I know the results. I am
um going to try and find time to watch the last three hours of Sunday. What did you think of
did you watch night one then? So yeah I watched that. What did you think of the night one?
I always find them quite underwhelming almost to me. It was underwhelming uh and it's mad how
much of it is still the same patterns the same cycles of when we was kids watching it uh again
I don't know the names but there was the one of them there was the whole trailer before the fights
um and he was like I'm scared. He was fighting against Gunther. Is that what he's saying? Right
so that's his name then um he's like I'm scared what do you expect me to do and he's like you know
oh I don't know what's gonna happen in this fight then and obviously he ends up winning.
Spoilers for anyone that hasn't watched it and does plan to watch it um I don't know they might
not give a shit to be fair just two almost middle-aged men talking about wrestling.
Yeah have you seen that uh like what's like an ick is like people that watch
wrestling have you seen that clip the guy doing that then like goes to rock like shit up bitch
um yeah so there was that uh the uh Uso brothers yeah I did no I didn't write down
for it that matchup again it was just obvious I knew as a because I've not seen it was only
because I mentioned Rikishi the other week that I knew about Uso brothers then um and I just as
soon as I saw the drama leading up so again the pre-fight trailer that was going on I thought well
at some point the one that's betrayed him he's gonna get hurt and then start apologizing
and then he's gonna be trying again and lo and behold it happened I was like literally if I
didn't already know and like watch it after it already happened but if I didn't know how it was
gonna go well no sorry if I hadn't already watched it after it had been on I would have put bets on
to say this is gonna happen because it was so that predictable um because you know that the
WWE is moving to Netflix oh he didn't know that yes yeah I think I did see something actually so
they're like trying to make it so it's like a new era so you remember how the attitude era was yeah
um we started on gold obviously the rock Shawn Michaels DX and everything uh so they're trying
to bring it so it's more because he went PJ to an extent obviously they don't do brown panties
matching anymore no obviously the women are wrestlers now and everything all that yeah but
they're trying to make it so it's more going towards that you know back to how he was into
that attitude area with the swearing how would that work though because especially on Netflix
because you are but in terms of what how would that work no I'm just thinking because obviously
now the way it has been for a long time with Raw and Smackdown and it's easier available for the
younger kids to watch so if it goes to Netflix and they are trying to make it well over here
it's on one channel TNT BT yeah in America uh Smackdown was on one channel Raw was on a
different channel okay so as far as I'm aware that ww WWE got brought out by the company that owns UFC
so that held the whole of the WWE franchise and then it's gonna be on Netflix I don't know if it's
just gonna be WWE Raw on Netflix and Smackdown or just Raw at the moment so that they're trying like
um because there's a lot of UFC on the zone as well isn't there so whoever didn't speak
yeah but that's how it works here I mean in America they have it's just copyright and two
arms that copyright obviously yeah so I don't know how we would work over here for say if it would
still be on Netflix I assume it would be because Netflix played a lot of money for it uh but in
regards to Smackdown I don't know if that's a part of the deal uh I'm just thinking like because
with Netflix are they gonna like put age restrictions on it so essentially you'd have
to have a parental lock to stop kids watching if they're gonna bring the yeah I think our rating
back to be essentially I think yeah I mean it doesn't have to be like 18 plus but I think
15 you know swear words you know just getting proper again proper wrestling I look you know
what I really like though mic work you know when people like talk the talk on the mic yeah
now my favorite person on the mic has always been The Miz and I just love when they can sell it like
the promo and I really like when they can sell it I always remember The Miz on the mic he's just
see he was coming in as I was getting out of it essentially so I've not seen a great deal he was
at WrestleMania you know yeah and I thought because not much was said about him on the build
up fortify and I thought he has he like declined that much that he's not because I feel like they
were trying to make him a main character and no he was champion for a bit I think he was
free time champion but he's a grand slam so I mean he's won every single battle available
intercontinental US championship tag team whatever about that's been there he has born up into the
new heavyweight yeah uh one so yeah no boys I just like when people that's why I like John Cena
really he was good on the mic The Rock obviously Stone Cold Triple H was good on the mic even
yeah you know and that's what it means just people that are confident in the more on the more
just as just a selling just because it's scripted but when you're on the mic that's just
that unscripted that's just you go out you've got to just go off the crowd yeah yeah it's
all right you've got this message to get across yeah just just get it yeah you got like four
minutes to promo we get this point across that's it uh yeah it was it was quality back in the day
I don't want any um I know we've spoke about it and reminisced about it on a previous episode um
yeah yeah I feel like because of how much
happened back then in that attitude era like nothing surprising for me or it wasn't while
I was watching rest of minor anyway um yeah because even with the tag team fight
I felt that the first night's main events because again I didn't know any anything that he was on
the line about bloodline rules with the next Sunday night yeah so as soon as I found that out I was
like well Cody's gonna lose then isn't it and that's gonna make it harder Sunday night because
otherwise it's an easier yeah it's an easier night for him so yeah it was all too predictable
um yeah again I can't comment on Sunday night but yeah I don't know if I've got enough time over
the weekend I'll finish watching Sunday I know I supposed to have been better overall but uh
yeah I haven't watched it because literally first thing in Monday morning
because I was watching it a lot of the bold upon tiktok so he was just full of it yeah all the
algorithms and I was just like I watched one I was just like fuck it just watch them all on there so
yeah yeah that's the problem though isn't it you can't avoid any comments of spoilers now
ah even Bluey spoilers for the new episode of Bluey it's fucking mad it's like a special one
so even after I sent you that tiktok the other night as well and you you're getting the spoilers
on it yeah like the next episode that comes out on Sunday as we do the podcast uh yeah it's like a
20 minute special they're only 10 minutes long with me so so like yeah yeah so I'm gonna spoil
this for that you know people give me their opinion on it well so as we was gonna say anyway
back to a shambles um so the undertake podcast yeah the undertake podcast that's gonna take off
at some points uh so last Sunday it was the Liverpool Man United game well Man United Liverpool
game again uh Premier League this time and uh James was giving it the big gun last week he was he was
confident and uh he had every right to be you know Liverpool that had been on fire and uh yeah it was
a an underwhelming game for Liverpool fans definitely I didn't see a single Man United fan
building up to the game that was confident getting a result no and I wasn't either but first half
Liverpool absolutely dominated Man United Man United didn't even have a shot on target and the Man United
fans in that stadium were absolutely going fucking mental but you know so like they didn't have no
you know I know I get what you're saying from that point of view but at the end of the day
you've still got a turn off and the first half Man United did internal but yeah so Liverpool
should have been well ahead more than they should have at that point so I know what you're saying
I felt like because the first couple of minutes it was the basketball football again tennis it was
back and forth yeah feeling each other yeah um and then the Ganatchio uh disallowed goal because he
was offside Bruno just held it for a little bit too long if he would have just passed it first time
Ganatchio was already on the way hence why he was offside by the time he did get the pass I think
that changed the the the United players like frame of mind then because it was like oh we're not
going to do it then and uh obviously down now uh one and a half time uh and then yeah it's still
nothing was going on until just that misplaced pass Bruno gets it and obviously Keller he's got
every role to be as far forward as he was yeah because Liverpool are just constantly attacking
anyway um and yeah so Bruno an easy finish it's you know before footballer yeah you expect him to
hit the target from that way out with no just lovely off the keeper well that's it yeah um
I do I know obviously before I think Bruno Fernandes is one of the most overriding players
I really I don't like I don't like his attitude I don't know why he thinks he's the bollocks
because I think if he goes I don't think he makes any other top but I'm not even saying
Manu's a top team I don't think he makes a top team at the moment I don't see
you I don't see him getting to Bayern Munich I don't see him getting to PSG
I don't see him going to Real Madrid I don't see him I think Manu is his level because Manu's
a level where everyone thinks they're better than what they are that that's from yeah that that is
the problem with the majority in you know squad at the moment Gennaro's got potential I think my
what's his name? Copi Manu I think he's just he's all right he's not he's not it's not he's not a
special talent I don't think he's but from how the rest of the senior squad are playing yeah
he might he might he makes they're making him look good yeah because he runs a bit mate
yeah yeah but he's you know he's taking on the players he says no sorry sorry to quick up jargon
he says say something when your right back's gonna be the player of the season it's only because
he's been fit the whole season yeah but like do you get what I'm saying that's your right back
that's your Gary Neville mate
I mean again that's a debate for another podcast he's used a better right back
no obviously Gary Neville what I'm saying is like that's did in him in any career any season did
Gary Neville ever get player of the season no so you're right back in the team yeah and that's
what I'm saying that's where Manu are I know what you're saying mate yeah but you can't get me to
try and defend the majority of the team this season because I can't I can't honestly there's just yeah
yeah yeah and so being like if if we was to finish in the top six so stay as sick at the end of the
season yes that is a fortunate now again you've you've slightly started me off mate you've
slightly started me off well I'll bite a little bit so there has been over 60 injuries so obviously
we haven't got 60 first team players but there's been over 60 individual injuries this season
right so that's always going to be a hindrance for any any squads you know Newcastle's had the
same uh Chelsea have been all right really it's just been patched in on its fob panel
Liverpool have had a lot of injuries but as I said the other week Klopp's been able to set the foundation
that every team so the under 23s the 19s the 18s has that style and they all pay the same so you
can just come in from any one of them other ones and fit into the same system um you know Man City
you know when you're uh fiddling the books all the time and you know got all the money to pay for
whoever you want um then you're going to be able to do that Arsenal have been really fortunate not
to have severe injuries if Declan Rose got injured this season they wouldn't be sitting
joint top of the league um so yeah it's it's for like 60 minutes this season we've had
10 hogs first choice team the rest of it it's been but isn't that football though it is and
the club that like Man U have spent so much money should have more than just one 11 that's
again mate you know if you want me to uh i'm just talking football if you want me to get some uh
hard-hitting facts that should get me onto the united stand then uh i'll give them to you because
we know he listens he actually does mate i'm telling you mark hello by the way mate you know
big fan you know uh but yeah if you want to know those beats then you'll have to listen to the
united stand in that anyway but yeah we're not here to defend Man United we're here to laugh at
Liverpool and not so much Liverpool a bit of James's expense so as i say sunday well i'll give you a
bit of background sunday's i like to have a little drink i'll cook dinner sunday roast every sunday
you gotta do it you know that's what sunday's made for football and sunday roasts and beers
so i've had a couple of beers during the game maybe some before and probably two afterwards
but after that shambles of a game two two weeks finished and Liverpool were lucky in the end as
well to get that because if Juan Basaka is great at elastic ditch tackle that's you know he's
he's made his united career off of that but he did it in the wrong position and it doesn't matter
how much everyone wants to slow it down and say that they are going wrong i saw an american
referee the next day analyzing it and saying that it was wrong he was clearly in it you know Man United
fan so yeah it's a penalty at the end of the day you know var allegedly looked at it they would
have done but apparently says no penalty it was a penalty sorry and uh you know again it was the
only thing that salad did all game really it was his main chance and he's put it away so they were
lucky to get a draw at the end of it and i just couldn't help myself just could not help myself
in uh giving James a little email so
so i just had to what was in your email your correspondence all i said i hope you kept it
professional i did yeah yeah all i said was juergens bottle jobs is all i said to him
you dropped some bile in there did you boy oh nice like a kipper did you really mean like oh
my he was really just like uh i can't even finger the gays now but just like one of the fishing programs
on whatever crappy sports channel that people have to watch fishing on um so yeah it was about an
abalizer his email after he's finished crying into his Liverpool pillow and teddy called Juergen
um
even down to little shicky boots on old school black prints yeah um now fucking deodorers or
something that's what yeah i do doors yeah uh 2004 on there from when jared was the Miami Giza um so
uh james's reply was uh fuck off united body can't keep a win to save their life
Brentford Chelsea and Liverpool were all dominating you shit cunts so i think i might
have rattled him a little bit with that one um and you know what i like about email is he got straight
to the point yeah you know he was very articulate with his words he you know definitely research
definitely uh definitely been keeping an eye on the united games the last week i think he knew
any email was coming so i couldn't help myself that's a say um again against Brentford you know
the the team didn't turn up Brentford deserved to batter us you know and uh again we got a goal
later on and then conceded straight away Chelsea i watched it to two nil down i hate these late
kickoffs oh because he was on sunday was one was like yeah Brentford was on sunday Chelsea was
uh wednesday yeah that's it yeah uh no was it yeah no no you're right right right yeah because
again it's the the days that we're on so it was it might have been saturday yeah saturday was
Brentford Chelsea was wednesday quarter past eight kickoff and i say watch two nil was off no it's
too late for me i'm already in bed trying to watch it i'm like no it's off i don't need to uh
go to sleep completely pissed off and then when i saw it was really four three in the end so i was
like yeah sound not surprised um but like i said last week it's liverpool's title to lose and if
they can't even beat a man united team that you know chelsea can beat and we all know how bad
chelsea's been this season um yeah it's it's just liverpool and and then the last three nil on the
road now i didn't watch the game but i heard there was absolutely terrible in that game
i only seen the uh highlights on tiktok this morning so what you're basically saying to me is
in juergens final season just at the equal i feel like it's going to be yeah um i'm hoping arsenal
do manage to win the the premier league just obviously because i don't want liverpool to
win it anyway because you know fuck moscow's us but man city we don't want man city to keep dominating
we don't want to have four in a year uh four in a row rather um for me as a neutral i would i would
prefer liverpool to me just in jergens final season because he has been a good manager
i would if you played on the urban club you'd want to run for a minute you know and that's like
what what man you end doing i suppose not running yeah as i've said before enough times uh the
majority of players don't play for the badge uh the manager or even the paycheck you know the
fucking the money that they get is ridiculous i was talking about this now if you give me 25 grand
a week right and so your job is to play football yeah that i would run fastest and further than
anyone else you know like when you have like you're the dude in came like 15 you know km run in the
game i would just all i would do all day is sprint yeah i was just just just run it wouldn't even
need to be 24 grand a week though would you think so we won't say what kind of wages we're running
that on the pod but you think even double three times what you're on the week at the moment you'd
still aim to be the fifties person in the squad wouldn't you and that that'd be a standard even
well because i was a superstar goalkeeper uh i've still got the fucking reflection uh the reflexes
as well fucking well stop these work tops from falling earlier oh which we'll get onto reflexes
in a minute i was meant to bring you earlier but uh yeah we'll get onto that in a minute um
but yeah so if i was a professional goalkeeper as well i'd make sure i'm the fittest and best
fucking goalkeeper in the league as well definitely um yeah but yeah liverpool are just uh
uh they'll be lucky to finish fucking second i mean could you imagine after all these they
end up finishing third and as you say just the league cup for uh gergen swansong so yeah james
um i hope you're still listening at this point anyway you haven't just like just chinned us off
uh you know it's all in jest mate and uh when you're ready yeah we'll start the undertaker
off mate
right so yeah onto reflexes so going off of the back of the holiday obviously almost broke my ankle
and then after we've recorded last friday saturday grafting because you know i've got to graft any
kid um not that a lot working on the weekends but sometimes we have to well i have to um i know i'm
terrible uh so doing these wardrobes and uh it's an awkward customer but the one on the floor to
ceiling and you can't get the feet on underneath so awkwardly getting the feet on and then as the
other one there's fucking i'm on the floor trying to get the back foot on and the wardrobes move
slowly because the other lads fucking shimmied it trying to fucking do something even though so
i've got a prop i've got more screw box underneath it i was i'll leave it there because i've seen this
seen this book read this page i've seen it happen before but no he's moved it out of the way
so as he's moving the wardrobe fucking the front foot has broke and look i didn't even see happen
it's just that the brain must have known what's gone on so i've managed to just about get my hand
out in time but so i've i've cut the top on my finger and i mean i won't be able to pull any
pictures up for any of the listeners at home but um the the piece of skin on the so where you go
from you your knuckle to the first joint on your middle finger that skin was just hanging back on
itself because of the way it just pulled it out quick enough and so i had to quickly tape it up
fortunately electrical tape is the best thing ever better than a plaster because if you get it back
on quick enough it just heals itself it's magic but there was a bit of blood sunday my finger was
bruised and i mean like it looked like he'd been to a pdd's house party it was that battered and
bruised it was ridiculous uh all swollen i mean it is still really tender you know struggling to
bend it off but yeah being through the wars uh we've just the wrong tournament um i don't get it
and then monday was about a bit eventful as well so i don't know what episode it was probably
not episode 10 or something i came up with well i come up with but i brought up a story about when
i was walking a dog early one morning and uh i was caught short so i had to go into the bushes and
poop in the bushes in the bush um so ever since then like because i know how i felt before that
happened before going out on the walk uh if i feel like that beforehand i'll make sure that i'll go
to the toilet before going on the walk just to save my uh bushes and not get caught short in the
bushes um so monday morning from there i could feel my stomach was a little bit ropey so
on the toilet by the way anyone uh just bearing uh like brace yourselves for a little bit of
poo at all because that's what we're talking about uh not wiping for a change um even though i did
have to wipe we'll get on to it so go into the toilet all good took the dog out stomach still
feeling a little bit ropey so as i got back gone again which is fun sometimes you need to go a
second time you know you got to get it out you know you've got to go you got to go and then
this is where it goes down a little bit of set off go off to the job and i'll shit myself in the
bun so i didn't know that i actually had but was he one of them when you fart i farted and i thought
oh i've all just shit myself and then i convinced myself that hadn't because i couldn't feel any
moisture or anything nothing felt squeegee and then i've got to the job and uh the lady of the
house was like talking to me now to be fair because i like in the morning i have a couple of cups of
tea and that and then i have like me flat while i'm driving so i need a wee anyway you know i've
drove over and i had to get to the job and yeah so the ladies talked to me i'm thinking i need a
wee i need to check that i haven't fucking you know had an accident and yeah there was so much
mess that not not like how you've experienced it with you know the little baby where you put it
on the back and everything it wasn't that bad but yeah i've had to end up sitting back down to make
sure i'll fucking clean my arse properly anyway because i've done the done the check wipe and then
i've seen pretty much the whole of the square was covered i was all nothing in my boxes so it must
have just been a little bit of a squirt and then because i was sitting down it's just smeared around
my arse cheeks um so yeah i had to fucking clean it then while i'm halfway through fucking trying
to clean it as well i've had the phone call from the delivery driver that he's fucking outside
so i've had to go long you know put me fucking buttons back up again go down take this delivery
and then as he's left i couldn't go because it had been like 10 minutes couldn't go to the toilet
again yeah so i've got me fucking me dead old wipes out the van and i've had to do a wet wipe
just to get the the last of it so uh yeah fucking monday was uh not a good day for me so if that's
any consolation for you james i hope you feel good about that i always remind you of the story of uh
one of our lads do you remember when he set up on the bus um was that nozl or mr green
no none of them uh so i what no because he's nicknamed he's anyway so he got on the bus
this was years ago still don't drive so i always think it's more embarrassing when he did is that
we said he got on the bus and he was on the four-wheel-drive he said like he got three stops up
oh farley absolutely himself like everywhere he said he had to like press the buzzer
the old valve he said he was fast he worked fast everyone had to be supposed to be morning busy
he said he had to walk like fucking them all back or wherever along it is
is you could see the shit on his palms all down him oh that's terrible so everyone in the bus knew
that he should have obviously when you get the buzz you see kind of the same places the only
yeah they're like no the next time oh that's terrible yeah so you didn't have to go through
that no no i didn't have to go through that because i have black boxes black shorts not work shorts
um but as i say i was surprised because there was no mess in the boxes it literally just you know
spread across the ass crap um i suppose it's probably one of the good things about having a
hairy ass is that it kept it all in
to be fair it's only because i haven't used my man's game for a couple of months
i'm a bum that is keep the pubes true um so yeah uh from shitty bonhols and broken fingers
uh after the actually no there is something else that i want to bring up before we do
go on to the uh final correspondence uh so this morning i drove past a uh he was a father and son
duo and uh well i say drove past it wasn't it was fucking first in the morning while i was walking
a dog actually so walking a dog and a father and son on a fucking morning jog and the kid was
like he was struggling and he wasn't a big lad or anything he was a young skinny kid um and he was
just struggling like to keep pace and that so they've ended up having to go to a walking pace
because he was far behind on that and it just reminded me when i was a kid and i mean a kid
kid like four or five years old and my dad used to take me with him for a run as well but it
wouldn't just be along the streets it was fucking along the canals and he i couldn't believe i'd
fucking forgot about it essentially well how dangerous is that well just because he'd leave
me as well he wouldn't like for me to catch up he'd just go along do his fucking four miles let's
just say i don't know how long the run was but he'd do his four miles down and then turn around and
come fucking find me on the way back again and then he'd carry on back up to the car so let's
just say i managed to do half mile by the time he's come fucking like gone to the end turn around and
come back so he'd tell me to turn around and go back the other way and then carry on to the car
and still wait for me to come back and fucking like meet up with him again so how dangerous that
would be like you couldn't even fathom doing anything like that these days could you but yeah
i just i was just walking the dog then getting to myself thinking i can't believe that used to happen
different world oh yeah yeah you know i'm more nice than nephew they're even allowed to go to
the park on the road remember like um when you was kids your mom used to send you to the shops
do you think that still happens now uh i think some people do yeah my dad used to send him
to go Rizla and Tabaco yeah look when i was like 10 yeah well again that's just how like uh
people have changed because the shop owners obviously knew the parents who the kids were so
below oh yeah my dad once such as such because again we've um not me but my uncle used to get
sent to the shop uh like the shop would close at 10 and like my nan his mom would say at like five
to ten go get me another bottle of wine and a pack of fags whatever it was and so he'd have to run
to the shop and hope to get there before it shuts and then log yeah and the fiber over whatever it
was get the goods and then run back to make sure it was all good then like and yet times were
differently you wouldn't do it now because the shop owners wouldn't be able to trust that the kids
were actually getting the parents um yeah it was i mean we've spoke about it enough times they're
all little bastards these days anyway we'll need a good slap um yeah so it just fucking well i had
to put it on my notes while i was walking because i thought it was funny well yeah i could have
could have fell in the canal and died on that fucking that was just like doing his run just
didn't care i could have got kicked now yeah i probably would have got a fucking slap for that
as well why'd you let yourself get kidnapped right so yeah onto the correspondence now then
even though we've already done uh well we've done all the emails actually um so we'll go on to the
the hotline uh oh seven four seven oh four double eight oh nine six get your messages in um whatsapp
text messages whatever uh well not that anyone has but there's no point trying to call because
i won't answer the phone i don't have it on me all the time um so first of all i should have
read this while we was uh talking about the football so uh leah says james is going to be gutted again
i love my because it was like like last week saying he's gonna be rattled and then uh we've got brian
uh what's happening lads it's who's weekend so hopefully i'll have a story for the next week
right well we look forward to that yeah uh so for any new listeners that's referencing his friend
who is just like james buckley from the in-betweeners thinks he can pull a hoot as girl
uh reckons he's got no chance but yeah right remember if he can get a video of it uh or
you know try and take a sneak picture of him trying to uh like chat her up and or like just
record any yeah record yeah you can get some evidence of it and then uh yeah we'll try and
put it on the part as long as there's nothing you know uh as long as he allows us to
fuck him all right fuck yeah i was just thinking it was he called ggpr i was me all that
yes uh base needs someone's like anyway yeah whatever any of but yeah well we'll see um
um and then uh last but not least uh question from carl what is the most shameless thing you've ever
done oh i mean i know i should have told you about this before yeah we started recording so you
could because sometimes when we get asked these kind of questions i always remember better one
after the story yeah and then i don't even remember to bring you back or uh so when i did read this
uh what came to mind was uh not just one occasion to be fair but a lot of the time when we used to
go out i don't know if it was it was definitely mainly when it was just us two uh i used to do a
lot of mind sweeping so mind sweeping for people that don't know is beer pinching no i think you've
done this in front of everyone because even neil tells me the story okay yeah i know i've definitely
done it in front of a lot of people but i remember a lot of times when you were doing on your stag
there you know yeah yeah yeah i can't say i was a no because you forgot your value or something
do you remember on the night yeah because i was gonna go back to the deeks and you and uh les
just thought no no it's all right no well yeah yeah because it was like no don't worry we're
so obviously stuck there anyway you're not gonna spend money anyway and then you went out for 10
minutes i'm standing next to leslie you come back with a point i'm like did you get that he's like
just took it off the table yeah i remember
putting it down it just got i remember one time um i don't know where we was but we weren't local
anyway and uh it was definitely just us two out and there was like when you got a column uh just
in the middle of the club and like it's got the little fucking stand around it and that and there
was someone's fish bowl on there so fish bowl is just a big bowl and uh i remember just grabbing
that and turning around walking towards you and then you was like you could see them turn around
to go and grab it and then they're looking around all confused like who's got it and that yeah because
you're holding in front of it i'm walking away from them they couldn't see so you just look
jadie's just walking towards me yeah i remember doing that so many times and it like in general
it's not like i didn't have the money it was just funner and so ah free drink i never got what you
did that so i think it was just just for the game any just fucking yeah you used to get fucking
steaming her didn't you stay in one's drinks just mixing everything i love getting used to get used
to get fucked i remember i haven't i think the wedding my wedding uh was the last time
now because i still remember the end of the night actually so you're trying to say was that something
you went out and can't remember yeah proper blackout drunk um yeah i don't know when the last time was
blackout drunk like that but i did used to love it really just just going out getting rat arsed
and then yeah just waking up so what happened i don't know and then well as we said before we'd
go to the cafe the next day and oh he's at all be telling the stories and i'm not i don't know i
don't remember you know the amount of times i was just thought yeah just love it just love it yeah
yeah i want to get pissed now fucking it's been a hard week i'm trying to think actually what would
be my shameless thing i don't know i'm quite you've always been very tiny yeah
look shameless like i don't know how well i'm just trying to think maybe i shouldn't i should get off
the night i think in my head uh so have you ever spoke to someone about you shouldn't have
but they're not been bothered no no it's not your character um no um
commit again i've done it i know you know i've also the branch i'm just being i think i've ever
done and it's like when i uh when i look back i'm like what the fuck did i do that
both the kids are like every week when i used to give us a pounds go to the shops and this week
when a pound could get you a fucking a raw fucking can of coke packed crips chocolate bar change in
your back pocket yeah fucking proper pound none of this shit pound stuff now you fucking can't get
a can of pop with it so what kind of pops now like one pound five or something i can't surprise what
the fuck man i already drink pop anyway but yeah yeah so my nan dropped the purse one time he went
all over the floor and that literally i kept i kept a pound i don't know why i did it and i like so
she gave us an extra plan so i had two pounds and then on the way i was like i found a plan and i
know for a fact she knew i was fucking like i knew for a fact that she knows i took a pound off that
and she never ever said nothing and i always think like that that comes back i'm always like
what the fuck did i do that i was like fucking no i know like you know what i'm saying i just
knew it was like but i'm just going so i think it's a nan thing but your nan in general was
the fucking sound anyway so because she knew all of us like all your mates and that and fucking
she always had time for all of us and that anyway anyway you know you wanted to salivate and have a
chat and that um and like even if like you or your brothers and sisters and that weren't there
any of us could have knocked on and fucking had a cocktail whatever she would have always if all
was seen um but i think that's like a nan thing in general anyway so i'm just trying to i'm just
trying to think of something like shameless i'm trying to look that's something i look back on and
go oh yeah i don't know if you got any more while i have a quick think i mean i've got a few where
it's like you know during the top shaggy days um now you're laughing top shaggy tags like i
don't think you're calling me that right the fans looking uh but now i remember like uh
not meaning it like nasty or anything like but you know i was honest with them basically uh just
saying like you know i'm not after a relationship or anything uh you probably would have like
fitted in with how the people are these days but i below you know i'm not ready for a relationship
just want to have a bit of fun and that and then you know some of these girls caught feelings
and i didn't so i was all right yeah i'm gonna nip this in the bud now then because you're already
telling me but there was one literally like two weeks of like you know a bit of fun and that
so i love you jay i'm not i don't love you so i'll just i'll roll we'll leave it here now then
because i'm not gonna carry on having my fun while you're falling for me and i don't you know so
i'm being nasty to be nice in a sense because i didn't want to i didn't want to string them along
and then they're like you know where's he's going i'm like going nowhere yeah but that time really
being shameless being honest though isn't it to a degree yeah but there's a lot of shameless things
i mean you know you know uh you was there for some of them uh experiences not like
i think you was there while i was doing it but um you know uh i don't say the same house party
or whatever while i'd be doing things in another room um yeah it was just just good old fun
yeah and uh yeah that was a good night that was uh after you that did not no no man
okay not many of the other lads ever fucking did look after me it was always me being the
the good bro the good wingman um but as we said last week you know okay i've never been discriminated
against uh the females never have winged in for a man um
say that we've in our main friend group we haven't got a homosexual no or a bisexual that would have
gone home with a man that would have required me to but there are some there are some questionable
ones in the group oh yeah we know very questionable mate yeah but that's just army laughter isn't he
well he's not the only one but yeah i don't know but it's a good job they don't listen any
i've got a question for you if you went to Thailand
and someone's like shagalady boy would you shagalady boy
because this is where my mind took me because of them to in there because these two lads have both
said they would go to thailand and shagalady boy and it's like that jeffrey video do you remember
the jeffrey video when he was he was like a lad is absolutely the blonde lad when you go to
hokky in turkey yeah when you go to turkey you gotta have a kebab it's the same like it's
like it's yeah it's the uh the old saying when in rome is yeah but what do the romans do that
i suppose you just be you throw that dishanging signal about everywhere
yeah and you emphasis on everything like
like you can you i feel with italians you can understand what they're saying without words
yeah and you can see the hand gestures with the words as well
but uh no so i know just only from what i've seen on tv and internet and that a lot of them are
very deceptive it's hard to see that they are a ladyboy with some of them no because that's what
they are you know they call themselves them ladyboys as well you know they don't say she-males or
trans or anything that's what they want to be they're not ladyboys they're boy girls no they're men
with tits yeah yeah so i don't understand where the ladyboys come from when it's just men with tits
i would say that's that's what they want to be called isn't it um that's how they make the money
Jeffrey made a bit of money that night i can imagine
so yeah if i was there and i don't know so i'm i'm out on the town i'm having a couple of beers
and that log and then like not that i would know because i'm married happily um but you know if
if circumstances led me to be there and i could fly away or whatever well obviously so i was
i should have rephrased it with ojb of yeah yeah so stop talking about again you're the only one
who's calling it that you said top tag originally so uh back in the day uh yeah i think if i was i
i having a drink and that and started uh if you were an army boy of one hour in tarland
and you've walked down the street uh how are boys
you don't know bab you've only had one would be calling him bab yeah um so you've had one beer
and you've walked back no because you go into the next bar you work passing the one yeah but
before even going out i would have had a load of beers anyway you know what i'm okay yeah um
um but yeah so what i'm saying is if if i would have got into the situation where i didn't know
that it was a laid boy at first because you know they were quite convincing on the face and the
tits aspect uh when it comes to the nitty gritty i like then i'm seeing as a dick down there or
feeling as one you know because sometimes you've got to have a grope first then i would have uh
put my clothes back on if i was already naked um but basically i would have left that situation
i wouldn't you wouldn't yeah you wouldn't have participated no i would have just walked out
after sucking his dick and then
no i'd just be all the time and he'd be like sorry i've misunderstood the situation i shall
go and find a real lady now enjoy the rest of your night because me and uh there's an old boy at work
and he was gonna go to tarland before covid booked in everything but then because of covid he got
cancelled yeah and we were saying what's an old man you're gonna do in tarland he's like i'm gonna
go fishing it was like fuck off no one goes fishing in tarland fishing for lady boys that's all i'm
doing and we was like no you'd be down the strip and it'd be like you come in and he'd be like
nice day nice day sweetheart maybe you know no no and then he'll perhaps he'd walk past that
you're doing an adam sammer repression well this is the way it speaks he'll walk past him again
and they'd be like oh right then you go in you'd have a good time like because he thinks he's a
tough sugar as well well used to be yeah so yeah yeah any lady boys are listening send us in your
dick pics ashley wants us here um but no we are gonna leave it there anyway uh james i hope you
uh see all in jest um yeah the undertake yeah coming next season right would have to be next
season every tuesday after all the football fixtures as well after the monday night football you can
have your opinion all the weekends events yeah um i'm gonna say it after next season anyway because
little boarder not having any of this season yeah um and uh yeah so send you emails your text
messages whatsapps and whatever uh all links are in the description uh hopefully i don't film
my pants again next monday yeah that'd be great it was one of the worst starts so weekly you'd have
to be fair no i get it because when i did it in america i get it i get it it's just unfortunate
sometimes just happens yeah um and it is one of the things you can't help other than having a good
duck and healthy diet uh but yeah so on that poop shell we shall leave it there and uh we'll see
you next week then peace all right you