Hi everyone and welcome back to another episode of the Real Talking Podcast with your host
Ash and JD. Now for anyone who is watching on the YouTubes, we're not being tramps and
wearing the same clothes.
Or are we?
I mean, you know, we do it sometimes but it's never planned to wear the same clothes two
weeks in a row. But it is planned to do two recordings like the other week. So yeah, we
are back to back in it. So apologies again for if anyone has emailed, we've not read
them out during this week. But obviously send them in as always and we will get to you as
soon as we can. But the reason for this back to back recording isn't because I'm going
on holiday again, I've only just come back. It's because we've got some news that we haven't
told anyone yet. Even though we've hinted, well, not that we've hinted but I've said
a couple of things that people might be able to put the pieces together. I'll let you tell
it anyway, it's not more news. Ash has got AIDS.
No, no, no, no, using HRV positive.
No, all of these people, I'm having a little girl. So we're back to back in this one because
obviously as well as this, by the time this goes on, hopefully she's here. So obviously,
just to give everyone a heads up. So on this one and possibly the next one, you might be
writing solo on the next one. Yeah, we might have to do that. It'll be the real talk with
JD. JD and JD. I mean, I'm used to talking to myself anyway so it doesn't matter too
much. Yeah, so just a heads up for everyone. That's why we're back to back in this one
and then the future one might just be JD for a week or two. But yeah, any emails this week,
JD will surely... Yeah, I'll definitely get on to it on the next
week. Which to be fair, now is when I would need you even more because if I am doing it
on my own, I'm gonna need some topics to talk about. Otherwise, I'll have to do a bit of
research and planning. A bit of ranting. There'll be a whole segment on Sam Smith on that one.
Reasons why JD hates Sam Smith. Just shouting on about Southgate and shit selection again.
The real rants of JD. Yeah, I might have to do it as a special episode.
You know what? You should have like, when you do your own one, like a five minute just rants
of fun. Like five, just quick fire. Bam, bam, bam, bam.
Yeah, just the real talk and special segments. Just like mini episodes. But to be fair, if
everyone wants to do that, I could die anything with that. And they'd all be the same. Well,
most would be the same. Fuckin' hell, I've just gone off the motorway dickheads again.
Yeah, well, ranting about Sam Smith or the Southgate, poor man, you know, poor menses,
cheap AR again. It would be the same rants over and over. Which I'll actually do. If
the people want it, I'll do it. I don't know if they want it, mate. I don't
think they want that. But if you do want it, yeah, email us in at realtalkinpop.gmail.com.
But yeah, so yeah, all going well. This time next, probably, you will have become a father,
yeah, for essentially a couple of days anyway. Yeah. And the weird thing is normally, I was
speaking about this with my partner, normally I overthink everything. I mean, anyone else
that does it, we're fucking tired, fucking pain. I don't know, even though society seems
to worry me or stress it, man, no to die, I can't resolve it. I will still spend that
whole day overthinking about it anyway. But yeah, because you've always been quite the
worrier. Yeah. You know, even as of recently, it was the fence panels, the neighbour. So
just for a bit of context, actually his neighbour attempted to change the fence panels. But
it wasn't his side. Yeah. So yeah, it's the neighbour side of the fence. So it's their
duty to replace broken ones. And then he didn't do it. He just placed it, propped it up. And
he was in the garden while then. It was actually during a record. Yeah, that's the thing now.
I was just like, I looked at it, I was just in the back garden, like, what? Knock on
my head, it's open. Yeah. And so I ended up having to grab it and sort it out. Yeah, you
wrecked it. Yeah. But that was a whole week of, not necessarily worrying, but it was just
someone had done your area and you was overthinking it for literally a whole week until I'd sort
it out. Like I said, anyone that does this, I just would know. But that one time with
the fence. So I just couldn't, I couldn't get over it. Like it was just on my mind,
just 24 seven. But anyway, this is, we've been part of being pregnant, but it's just
something that I haven't really worried about. I don't know why. It's just something that,
I don't know. I think because a lot of it, so obviously we've done the bedroom off. Yeah.
It was all decorated, panning done and whatever. And I've said, the house was really sorted
and that anyway. So because of stuff like that, it's been a gradual process. Everything's
been done while we've been in time. Yeah. So you've not had to panic, like last minute
you've done, you've been able to get whatever furniture, um, just, just prepping to be a
dad. Yeah. You've been out. Yeah. You've got nine months. Yeah. So you've been able to,
you've not obviously people have helped in general as they always do an animal, but you've
got enough money to just go and get whatever you need to be prepared. But that was the
one, the thing I remember saying to you when you, when you've done the room and the whole
panning, I did say, I know it's the wall, the white, but I just want to get it done.
Just because I know if it was come to now and it weren't done fucking hell. Well, maybe
yeah. Yeah. Definitely be a bit, uh, stuffed if it wasn't done by this point. Yeah. But
I mean, I remember at the time I wanted to get it done anyway, because let's just say
if it got to two, three weeks of the due date and you had a change of mind or you wanted
to change your color, I'd still have, yeah. To be honest, quickly like repainted or whatever.
So at least we had an uptime. Yeah. The color spot on the color spot. It was Egyptian column
by the way. Um, I think it was, what was the brand of it? It was a dulex that one. I think
it was a dulex. I'm sure it was dulex Egyptian column on that one. So if anyone checked that
out, I would recommend it. Cause the one thing now, you know, once in the whole, why, you
know, so, so maybe in the whole, why in the future, uh, so again, a bit more content for
people to actually bought this house. Uh, about a year and a half ago. No, it's over
two years now. Is it? Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So they bought the house and at the time the
jobs that I was doing, they were only taking a couple of hours for me to get done in the
morning. So I was coming, look, earn my money, come here straight away. And then ended up
just painting pretty much everything as quick as possible. But a little more context on
the context as well is when we first moved in the only room I really wanted to do it
was the living room and the bedroom. And I wanted to leave everything just let it, let
it be. But because of how much time I had literally it was done and the living room
was done that quick. Then you repainted the kitchen, the original color, just a briny
law. Yeah. Because before redoing the kitchen, the walls existing were Magnolia. Everything
was my, the whole house was to be fair. Yeah. But that's, it's always been a standard staple
to go to for sat in the house, just painted Magnolia and it's done. But with the old kitchen
that was in, because I painted everything once just to freshen it up. That sort of put
the motion in works for the kitchen then because it made the rest of the old cabinet doors
and that look horrendous. Yeah. So we got to the point where the rest of the house,
so a lot got updated, if you will fresh paint, new paint, all our own colors. And then he
just, I remember seeing on this table being like, fucking hate this kitchen. I don't,
apart from when I was doing stuff here, I wasn't here every week that either was off.
So when we'd be speaking on the phone that would be the main topic and subject of I hate
this kitchen, but we'd already started getting the boring motion in as well. To be fair,
already started getting the ball in motion then as well.
To be fair, I weren't really sold an idea of doing it.
Then you came over one time, like, yeah,
I could smash down a week.
That's what I was like, just a week.
And he was like, yeah, yeah, to be fair, you did, didn't you?
Yeah, yeah, yeah, we did.
Yeah, so just in general, it was just a makeover.
It wasn't new covers or anything.
It's just new doors, work tops, and stuff.
So he was done a bit quicker than an average kitchen
bit, the flooring as well, all at the same time.
But the flooring obviously goes into the bathroom as well.
Yeah, yeah, it goes into those.
I think you sound yourself a bit short there, Jay.
You've done a great job.
Well, always home to please.
What's up, Shaggy?
But no, as a time scout, he was just a little bit quicker
than a full-time fan, because he would have been taking
the tiles up and all that, and then he would have been
plastering the walls and stuff.
So yeah, but yeah, it was a relatively quick turnaround
for the whole house, wasn't it?
He was all done.
And yeah, the last main thing was just the
he wasn't even classed as a guest bedroom before, though,
was he?
No, no, it was just a spare room.
Yeah.
But that's the one good thing is having someone like you
is whenever I have an idea, I can run it.
Jay D gives me the numbers, and then it's over, yes or no.
Like next year, flooring, living room.
Yeah, that would be changed again.
Yeah.
What's his dog?
Harry Bond.
I always call it Harry Bond for some reason.
Probably just because you have Harry Bond sweets or something.
Yeah, we'll have that.
To be fair, if I remember in the editing part of all of this
that I'll put some of the pictures on the YouTube
for people to see.
Obviously, nothing.
Are you trying to get some work, mate?
If people want to go back on some previous episodes,
get more contact quotes out at the workshop,
ask me for a quote, get some work to do, then, yeah.
I travel around most of the UK.
The process would have to be really good
if you wanted to come over to America where some of the fans are.
But yeah, if I remember, I'll post some of the pictures
just so people can get an idea.
Because we're saying about the kitchen
and obviously the panelling and stuff in the Babi's room.
Because one thing that you keep saying that you should do
but you never do is do before and after.
Now, you do in my brother's kitchen, and his kitchen is shit.
So that would be the...
I was thinking about this, actually.
That would be the perfect one to do it on
because that is a shit kitchen.
Yeah.
Well, again, because I did my mum's kitchen the other week.
And I've taken the totals off the wall
and then remembered to take the pictures.
Which, to be fair, I don't know what would have looked better anyway
with the totals on or off.
So once, because I had to wait for a couple of hours
to get delivered still, once that's done,
then I do want to at least update the website
that I've got.
I've paid for it, never done a thing with it.
But yeah, I'll try and remember,
just post a couple of other pictures.
These cards are the jobs.
Because it is, it's not,
but you use that picture of this before I've ripped it all out anyway.
So I'm sure I've still got a mum on my phone.
Because it is, no, it's exactly the difference.
But as always, it's all about happy customer at the end of the day.
That's it.
Not just because you're my best mate.
I had to make sure you was happy because, you know,
you think you was bad enough worrying with the broken fence panel.
Jesus, man.
There was something that you wasn't happy with this lot.
No, no.
The podcast wouldn't have happened.
I don't think I was really too ordered by the kitchen.
So obviously, you kind of, when you've measured up and then,
you know, when an order did, but no.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
I mean, we started somewhere, then did somewhere.
Took you on a journey.
As we were saying, come this time next week,
you're potentially going to be either sitting here or in the living room,
holding a little baby girl.
And yeah, trying to get a routine started.
Trying to figure it out.
Yeah.
So yeah.
Anyone that has got questions for JD, which I feel like.
You can ask JD a certain question that you can't ask me.
So I feel like if you've been more free ride on the questions,
I'm sure JD be willing to.
Again, to be fair, because if I am recording, I'll be at home.
And I'll be drinking as well.
So cookie, it'll be just pretty flow and any.
I mean, I mean, I've been in.
I've seen it.
It's like when me and my mates started a podcast.
It's two people getting like arrested from a movie and I thought.
Far off.
Well,
Not the.
No.
A bit more loosely.
Controversial.
Yeah.
As we said.
The first.
The first four episodes are not because of anything we said,
but it was just the production of it was.
Yeah.
I feel like if you was listening to the first four,
We've grown a lot from then.
So you wouldn't have got.
Essentially.
He was.
Stumbling upon us now.
And then if you.
Cause all I want to do.
Podcast.
I'll go back.
Listen.
So it was more so just.
If he was to do that.
I mean, I'm not going to do it.
I don't know.
Yeah.
You know, it's just.
It's been a process.
You know, we've come on leaps and bounds.
I mean.
I've not checked the lights.
And it was, you know,
The amount of people that have downloaded.
On the first day of that episode coming out.
You know,
It's a.
It's.
Shocking really because.
Just to think we are.
We are.
I mean,
The big ocean of.
People that did a podcast.
You've got all these celebrities and everything.
I mean, everyone's got a podcast now.
Well, it is really.
Isn't it?
And you know, there's also two.
Just.
Right.
Yeah.
The Brummie.
And some.
Some people.
I.
Only.
Oh, God.
Yeah.
But yeah.
No, obviously that's what we're always.
Thank you.
All the emails and all the downloads.
And that's why we are.
We really do appreciate.
Everything.
Just a little bit of time.
You put into the podcast.
Just send an emails.
It means.
It does mean.
And that's what.
You know, we do say.
If you can download.
Because we can.
Physically see.
The amount of people that are listening every week then.
Just from the download numbers.
You know.
There probably is a proper way to do it.
But I just haven't seen it yet.
How to see.
The full listening figures and what it is.
And then.
I mean,
I think it's a good thing.
How to see the full listening figures.
And what are they?
You know,
I think I'm going to email you a question.
I think I'm going to do it.
I feel like.
From like.
Like.
What's it called?
Like.
You know,
Jane Doe.
We know he's a John Doe.
So I'm just a fake name.
Yeah.
I have to make an email.
Well, no.
Yeah.
So.
I mean, to be fair.
If it's just a standard couple of emails,
I'll still be able to wrap it up anyway.
Well, no.
I'll make sure I've got some stuff.
Some topics to talk about for a little while.
Yeah.
I mean, is there anything you want to.
I mean, you know,
because you're,
as it says,
you know,
you can ask J.D.
a certain kind of question.
And he's.
You know,
you'll get an answer.
Yeah.
I'll be recording.
It's most likely not what we did last week.
The week before,
you know,
chilled ones.
I had a couple of drinks.
And yeah,
I'll be doing the same at home then.
Yeah.
Is anything.
I'm an open book.
Anything you want to ask.
You know,
we're always here for a bit of voice as well.
Like.
See you.
Yeah.
I have some good advice.
Invested for real,
real advice.
Yeah.
So we'll get on with it anyway.
So as we like to do,
you know,
partial to a little best hole,
the confessions page.
Yeah.
I always think some of them are.
A two fake.
They seem to.
But then again,
it's.
They seem to fight to be true.
Well,
I know I have seen some of them and it's,
it's one that I've seen from like years ago.
It'll be like a little story of something.
Well,
I know that one's not real there.
So yeah,
you have to sort of weave in and out a little bit.
Well,
I've stumbled across a new one.
And it's ACS fessions.
So.
Right.
So.
As I've been looking through them,
there are a lot from universities and colleges over here in the UK.
Right.
And some of them,
I mean,
obviously I've got some of them here to read out the pleasure and obviously
people at home for their pleasure.
But I have,
I've just been giggling at her because it's not,
it's not like I'm going to be able to read it.
I've just been giggling at her because it's not the same as the way that the
best home has been.
You can,
I'd say the majority of these are going to be real.
I mean,
there's a lot of stuff like girls on a uni.
I can imagine you never went.
No,
no.
Too smart for it.
For me,
I always wanted,
I always pitch universities like,
you know,
American pie,
you know,
the red cups.
I know.
Yeah.
Beer,
bong party.
Yeah.
I don't think it's,
I think our university students,
there was a period where they're trying to be like the Americans.
You play those sorts of games and that form.
It's just not the same.
Our cultures are too different.
And it always makes me laugh.
You know,
they can't drink.
The Americans can't drink the way that we do.
I mean,
I've been,
I've been to combine mills for讓一開心 sign about our country.
Our country.
I thought it was helpful.
Yeah.
I mean,
the English,
the pie and the
and the pie and the pie would have been for equal expenses.
But the point is,
like us being the people at this university
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is when relative,
the person you sit with sitting next to the part
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accent fracture is spices were there.
And I think this isâ
illegal. You know, they have a full skin form, it's not real. Yeah, so ACS fessions, you know, there's me
saying about, I think most of these are real. This one probably is a bit full of shit. I got all three of my flatmates
pregnant, but none of them know about the other two. They're bound to find out soon, what do I do? They're all meant
to be more secret girlfriends. That's when someone in Manchester met you. No, that one's so as I say, yeah,
you're gonna have to weed out some of them. But you know, these types of people, it's not fucking, are things too
big, I can't help but make every girl come so hard, blah, blah, blah, fucking hell, shit out, guys. And why is he
in a shared accommodation with three girls? You know, you're not gonna be that lucky. So that one's also how
would you have one on one time with all of them without being one that knows? Do you get what I'm saying?
Yeah, that one's a lot of shit.
That one definitely is. But I'll try and get more realistic ones. So another one here from a Newcastle
University student. Once on a note, I managed to pull and took her back to my room when we were about to do
it. She tells me that she is a ladyboy. And worst part is that she had a bigger dick than me.
Wait, so there's, there's some of that needs to be addressed here. So she told him and then he went,
obviously, he still carried on.
Yeah, yeah. So we discussed this before, Tom's a different man from when we was out courting, dating and all that.
Yeah, it's not a ladyboy. It's it's she's not it's not a ladyboy. It's a boy with tits.
Well, it's not how the Filipinos know that that's what the yeah, but then the one born with both may
honor honor. It's only one got searched people are. Yeah, it's just there's that many genders and
yeah, why is pronouns and whatever they want to call themselves names. So if this is called themselves
a ladyboy, then that's their choice. Well, maybe this lad has just used the wrong words to say,
right? What would you do if that happened to you? Firstly, I'd be quite annoyed because you've
already probably got lost with her. Yeah, yeah. I think you have to be open throughout the back.
Yeah. No, if you you're a no, they probably won't see this way. But if I'm having a fight on one of
the toll and on Jack, you know, just in case you didn't notice, but I've got a bit of an adult Adams
Apple there, you know, and a bit of a bulge down there. Are you wanting to still go further? So I'd
want a bit of open honesty. You know, so after you've gone for a while, I wouldn't want to get
bombs. Let's put it that way. I just have it. I just have a I don't understand boy. He's realized
what they've said they're a ladyboy. And then he still continued to find out. Well, as I say, you
know, it's all different for these you these days. Anything goes we've established that he
probably really doesn't care. It's just that that was his first experience.
I was so what he's trying to say the worst thing out of this whole scenario is that he had a smaller
with that. That's that's his problem. Yeah. Yeah. That, you know, he probably is just an
average Joe war smaller. And then this ladyboy has got a bigger dick than he. But he says that
he's still hit though. Games to game. No, it's a different you know, for me, it's a different
games playing. Is it in the same sport? No. No, no, it's a different sport. Yeah, no. It's
different. It is different. It is. He's he's sort of funny. No, we're not so funny. No,
what's that? Fancy. Fancy. He's fancy, mate. You know, I don't want to be fancy. Well, to
be fair, though, fancy, the sort of sangment. What are you trying to back it? What would you
do in that situation? I'd probably cry my big dick in your face. I just can't imagine. I
wouldn't even if someone said to me, look, obviously, I'm a ladyboy. What the fuck? I
think I'll be angry more than anything. I'll be fucking Yeah, no, no, I would be angry.
See, I know you'd be intrigued by you won't go that far with that. Anyway, because you'd
notice the big feet and be straight away. He'd be ignoring the conversation. Yeah. I
mean, she doesn't know big feet. Big feet on girls. It's just it's just no, it's just
not for me. It's weird. No, no, no, once that a lady with canoes or a dick. So yeah, that's
that one. Now we've got another one from someone from Derby University. Fucked a transgender
girl. And it was the best I've ever had. So again, lady. It's a transgender so she said
again, sorry, my sister or I don't want to be politically correct. Yeah, a transgender
girl. And it was the best they've ever had. So the was a man. I'm assuming that this person
will be new circumstances for this lady. So yes, was a man. And he hasn't got a willy
no more. I'm assuming that there's nothing of data. Yeah, I mean, well, what I've established
is there's a lot more gay men out there. It's more open. I mean, yeah, I mean, I think people
just well, we've said it just he'd not just fuck anything. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I don't
know. I feel about these last two. I fully came twice in a row, which has never happened
before. But I told him no kissing because it's around. So what does that mean? So this
is an Asian person. So he's not married. So why should that come into play? No, we've
been getting canceled. There's loads of holes we can fall down in. Yeah. I tend to find
that people with religion, they pick and choose what they want to look and follow. Right.
So it's not just because it's around me doesn't want to kiss this lady or transgender girls.
Sorry. And you know, there's Catholic or Christian Christian things that we don't follow. If
I was going to be a proper Catholic boy, I wouldn't have had sex before marriage. But
you know, we do what we have to do. Okay. So with these last two, does that make these
two lads bisexual? By the letter of the law, it would do yes. And by law, I mean, the LGBTQ
community, their own made up laws. I just, I just, no, I want to say something next week.
No, no, you're not there next week. No, no, no, I just, I just, it's not your cup of tea.
It's just if you want a woman, just have a woman. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. You
don't need a lady boy. No, you don't need to be all around for the kisses. Balls deep.
Yeah. Whatever around whatever part of the train you're in. Well, that's another one
to try and find out more about. But yeah, it's easy to touch your subject for a lot
of people. We're real talking here. And yeah, I'd have to know, I'd be just pissed off that
you feel deceived. You're thinking that you're dirty, mate. Cause it's not who you are. Well,
that's what we'd be saying. Well, obviously these youth don't care about it and not for
it to be a problem. But yeah, no, before was getting down to be in the book. You started
stripping off and you know, we've seen the fucking tackle. Hang on, put them back on.
Off you go.
Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Cause I know you're speechless. It's a we're going to go in. Yeah. Let's just
move away. So, is this a number one? No, no. There's probably is more. So this body doesn't
say what you need a problem. It goes on into going down on girls and licking their underarms.
So this person loves my diving and loves a bit of armpit diving as well. I mean, it just
goes to so what we said since the podcast started, kids nowadays do anything. I mean,
I don't understand why you're doing that. Or in that moment of just being with someone
in that way, you brand girls lick armpits. I mean, also I must have put in must have
beef with the other person. Yeah. Let me lick your armpits. But again, is he going to be
asking or is he just going to fucking lift an arm up and start licking it? I mean, how
would you like it? I wouldn't like it. And I wouldn't like to do it either. You think
one a lot of them don't shave their armpits and that no more, which if they don't want
to, they don't want to. I don't care. But I wouldn't want to be getting an armpit hair
or armpit pubes in my mouth. If there's any sort of deodorant or anything on there, you
know, that's just going to taste horrible as well. We've all done it. We sprayed deodorant.
There's a bit too much in the air. You end up getting that taste. So properly licking
it would be horrible. I mean, again, I've had it with a kiss on the girl, the perfume
on the neck. You get that taste in your mouth as well. And it's just, I wouldn't want, you
can guarantee there's antiperspirant or whatever in the armpit. But maybe that's the kind of
thing that this person's into. I can imagine going back to the other two that, you know,
like it's all open as well. So he's went back to his like, yeah, he was a lady boy. I swear
rather than being embarrassed about it. It's like the Jeff video all over again. Yeah.
If that happened when we were younger, 10 years ago, whatever, well longer than that.
So it was like 15 years ago, we were out with the club and it happened. You wouldn't say
fuck all about it. He'd be in the cafe the next day. Yeah. Bang. And then that's it.
You know, I used to enjoy telling details about my activities and not before. So I'd
either have to make some, well, yeah, I would have had to because if I wanted to.
You just said nothing happened. And if that happened to you, you just wouldn't have happened.
Because if I was there, just thought not giving any details, you'd be all questioning me,
well, I don't know what's going on there because you haven't got a story about what's happened.
So yeah, another weirdo there anyway, looking at armpits. So this one's from Manchester
Uni again. Sucked off my lecturer for a 2-2. I'm a boy by the way, but not gay. Right.
So I'm guessing a 2-2 is like maybe like an A or B or passing grade, I suppose. I don't
understand the number system properly because there's a 2-2, a 2-1, I think there's a 1-1
or something as well. Right. So let's just say this 2-2 is a pass. I think 2-2 is a top
grade. Right. I think. Okay. I don't know exactly. I mean, was he based on his performance
that he got the 2-2? Was he spoken beforehand, took me off and I give you a 2-2 or was he
a 2-2 after the fact? I mean, these are all questions that should be asked. He was good
as well as he's got the 2-2 if he is the top grade. But again, he said he's not gay, but
that makes him bisexual to me. Yeah, which, bisexual is still gay, but yeah. Does, I mean,
this, but look, I know, I said it, it just seems to be a lot more gayness. Open, like
it's more open now. I suppose you have the right, I'm trying to think of the right word
here. Yeah. It's not frowned upon as much as if you told me you'd done that, mate, I'd
be like, yay. Well, yeah. And not in the fun way that we like to say. But there's a, there's
another comedian that I've listened to his podcast quite often, Chris DiStefano, I've
told you about him before and that. And he has a phrase that he says quite often, I'm
in the fog. So fog is free, open and gay. Now he says it just joking because he's married,
kids and all that log, Latino boy. But he'll act a bit gay sometimes with his mates, saline,
whoever else that'll come out with stupid stuff. Oh, well we've done, there's a bit of a fucking
banter over the years and a little joke or whatever. But I think essentially what I'm
getting to anyway, I feel like they're all in the fog these days that they're all free,
open and gay. Yeah. They're all open to endless possibilities. Yeah. We're there, fucking
oil beams on, blood load time, you know, making sure that people see us through the fog, that
we're not. Yeah. And we're staying in that line. Yeah. Not fucking swerving around. Not
sucking no cock. Yeah. No. Unless it's a weekend. I mean, I mean, if you was fired in a class
and you needed this class to get, to get the degree and the teacher went to you, suck my cock,
you'll get your degree. So you won't have to do another year, which is like a spur of 10 grand
or whatever. Would you suck that cock? Well, going from past experience, no.
What does that mean? So when I was in college, which was for my apprenticeship,
it was just men that were these lecturers. Men, real men. Oh yeah. Old school fucking,
you know, Tim the tourman, Tyler, types fucking, and I wouldn't have had to have done it.
No, but what I'm saying is if you, I know in your trade you wouldn't have to do anything,
but I'm saying if you had to, if say, put you back not now, or you're married obviously,
and you're in this frame of mind, put 18 Euro JD, he was a bit wild. Would 18, 19 Euro JD
suck the cock to pass a class? Right. So the answer is still no. And it,
because where I was going to get to, because even when I was in school and that, I, I, I
weren't as bothered about fucking, like the results that I got. You know, I remember we've
started performing arts as part of the final subjects. And, you know, so that's mainly acting,
music, but there was a lot of written exams in that forum. I never studied for any of them.
I remember one in particular, it was like a midway through the year exam, and I'd smash the
gutter, but I didn't know, you know, there was no effort put into it. And there was two other girls
that always tried in class and that, and they absolutely kicked up. There was a lot of shouting
at me in front of the teacher as we've all been given the results and that. And these
pricks doesn't even fucking try and look at him. He's got this really good gut, just because I've
got better than them. And, you know, I wasn't bothered, but I did it because it was just
something to do. Cause you know, as a lot of us did back then, it was either that or art,
just so you had a couple of lessons of not doing anything really. Cause we didn't have to do
science. I think maths and English was mandatory for us, wasn't it? And then quality, I think as
well. Yeah. And so yeah, performing arts, even though I enjoyed it, you know, it was just,
yeah, this is something that we're going to be able to just chill with essentially.
Yeah. I've done well with all of them, but maths was the only one that I actually studied for.
And then fucking, it was a mix up on the actual day of exams. They didn't give me the higher
paper they gave me the medium one. So I still smashed the medium one. Yeah. It was me and David
Roberts that should have both been on the higher paper, but just David got it. For the wars,
yeah. I was never, never bothered. I know it's just the way I've always been, you know, just
go with the flow and that. So I wouldn't have been worried enough to suck up the teacher.
I do think grades are more of a thing now as well as our generation. It wasn't, it didn't feel
important, but I feel like now with the schools really being academies rather than public schools,
there's more, there's more on the students to do by, there's more, I feel like there's more of a
career pathway now. Yeah. It's true. Doing that when we were in school anyway, I think we just
had the wrong school as well. Yeah, definitely. But I remember the teachers saying to me, oh yeah,
if you get such and such grades, you can look at doing this office job and go on to this career
path and whatever. I just always remember saying, oh no, I'm either going to get onto the tools or
go in the army because I was in the cadets at the time as well. So I already had the bill for that
and then we, uh, well, family members being in the army or whatever. So I always knew where I was
going to go in law essentially, but there's still, they just try and push it to me. I don't care.
I don't want to do that. And so I think because I've always had that mentality, I can't put
myself in that position thinking I'm going to have to get my cookie broke dirty with these teachers
come to get me sprayed. Oh yeah. I mean, I mean, at least you got the grades you wanted, I suppose
from this person. I mean, oh yeah. Yeah. They're going to have to do it all the time now though.
That's the problem. That's it now. I mean, why not knock him down, isn't it? Study or fuck him.
The shanty. But then who has who's under the power then because he could say, I'm going to go to the
bloke, whoever's in charge, headmaster, I'm not telling you, you may have to switch it off.
But I might go. Well, no, I suppose you can just shut out tweets, any. Right. Does that make you
boy sexual? It will do. Yeah. Okay. No. Right. Let's not run that page. Cause for me it's boy sexual.
This is a mad one. This is sort of got David Cameron, Tory sort of volumes.
And by that, I mean, because they had the, uh, uh, not the, not negging, but the stupid rituals
where he had to put the pig and all that in there. Um, so yeah, this one doesn't say what unit's from
my mate shagged the cat as a joke and now tells me he low key has a thing for cats.
How are we getting to stop? I've already tried talking, talking him out of it, but he doesn't care.
So now it can't be, but I know there's enough sick weirdos out there that would do that.
Cause we've all been sent the videos, the geezers, fucking a sheet. Yeah. And there was that one that
floated around years ago. No pun intended on that, but where he's got the fish and he's pumping his
and he's pumping his fucking cock in his mouth. Um, so there's definitely a weird person.
There's definitely a weirdo. But then it's doing it in front of people.
Yeah. And then it's telling people you love it. Yeah. And you think how, how are you controlling
the cat? Because if a cat doesn't even want to be stroked or petted, lost, it will fucking swallow
it up and walk by or run away. Whatever. So how is he fucking, well, physically, I mean, it's cat
right. Let's just put it out there. He's right. There's no cat's consent. Um, but I just don't get
how he's physically going to be able to do it all the time and fucking, yeah. And he must be a small
dick as well. Cause he's always tearing the cat. Maybe his mom delighted boy as well. The thing I don't like about this, if this is fake,
someone's fault. I've brought this as a fake, which is, which is bad in itself, but I don't like that one.
That's made me feel a bit uncomfortable. Yeah. But I remember when seeing that, because people do reply to these tweets and that and try and give their advice for me.
Um, no, I thought if I was going to give the advice for them, tell your mate to just get into the furry scene.
So we've all done people at dress up as fucking cats and dogs and that, and pretend to be said animals get into that.
Cause at least then in his head, he can think that he's bumming a car. He's actually bumming a person.
On a fucking hallway again, that's the worst man. As you keep saying, or, you know, it's just, they're all fucking too open with all these.
Yeah. Another one out. It doesn't say where they're from, but this man decided to eat me out and he was saying, I tasted great.
Little Dizino a few hours ago, some guy cream poied inside of me. I don't know.
Right. I believe that one more than any other one. It's definitely real. That one, that one has happened.
This one is definitely a fun and she's a dirty skater as well. Yeah. I mean, yeah. I mean, I believe that one.
Yeah. That one happened. Yeah. Someone that's living the slag life. Someone's been fucked. And then next one is when?
Yeah. Yeah. Literally. Yeah. 20%. That's the most. 20%. Yeah. And Australian's it. The most Australian-y one as well.
Well, at that moment in time, she's definitely straight. Cause she's already had one cream poied. He probably cream poied her as well. We don't know.
But yeah, she, she fucking loved it anyway. So that's the end of that. I've got no, I've got vessels, but they're from a while ago now.
So I'm not going to ask any of those. But I've got a couple of wood giraffes if you're interested. Yeah. Let's hear it.
So one classic one that I've seen a lot, but I've never asked, would you rather voice a duck-sized horse or five horse-sized ducks?
Five horse-sized ducks. Cause I just kick them. It probably should be more than five to be fair. Yeah. You can feel like you can just kick, kick, kick, kick.
Yeah. Just kick them away. As well as one big. Yeah. Yeah. The duck's just going to fucking peck your head off.
Yeah. It's going to try and kick out. The amount of times that I've heard that asked and that the triangle full of one horse-sized duck.
But no, it doesn't matter if there's a hundred little fucking duck-sized horses. You can boot the head off of all of them.
You can just jump and slam your way. Dead mate. See? That is four. Yeah. But the reason's too many answers.
Put the wrong answer. That's the only right answer. Yeah. So realistically, what animal do you think you could fucking roast off them?
Oh, but you mean like sort of siren-locked dog thing going? The whole animal king, man. Realistically, what's the type you speak?
So yeah. Yeah. So cats were going to boot the heads off, but you're not allowed to. Right. You know, we all know the football abundant marine.
But yeah, cats, majority of dogs are going to get it as well. Right. Yeah. Beast of fun. I'm just trying to, yeah.
So bears would kill me. Snakes would kill me. Crocodiles, alligators.
Do you think you'd have the reflexes to fucking stop a snake? No, because he wouldn't bite venom dead.
Yeah, but he only has to get you once, mate. Yeah, but you're in the stereo that you've got to bounce it though.
So you know that it's fucking. Yeah. So what I'm saying is, they're all snakes. Yeah. But like, he just has to.
As soon as he drops a little bit of venom or gets one of you, it's not a glorious way to go.
I reckon I could fuck around a snake. Do you mean before it's fucking gotten there? Like a poison. Yeah, I reckon I could do that.
I don't know, mate. I mean, if he was to fight a poison, I'm not being funny. I might back the poison. Why? Because.
Well, you're going to lose that head then, because I'm telling you. As soon as it rears up, look. Yeah, and it's fucking. When it's going.
I've still got that catlaw reflex and I've got your neck now. Yeah, but he's still got a tail, mate.
Yeah, and it can try and fucking wrap itself around him. I'm a fucking bankidaze.
I've got two bits wrapped itself around my arm because I've got a brownie in my ass.
I'm going to start slamming my arm on the door. Yeah, but that is going to break your bone before you slam that on the.
He's fucking just punching his little face as well anyway. I don't know. I might have to get that to happen.
Fuck off, I'm fine, I'm sorry.
I was just trying to. I mean.
Right, so lizards are not in general then. Just going to boot them away.
Yes, I'm just trying to. I'm thinking like size. I'm just trying to. So I'm at like shapes and that easy.
Yeah, it's about the shaping. Yeah, even then fucking the Rams when they're fucking putting you on that.
I'm going to go a wolf. You reckon you could have a wolf? Not every wolf, but I reckon. A one on one.
One on one. It's 50 50. I reckon. I don't know man. Wolves are fucking vicious as well.
This is because I'm I'm trying to be like really sickly where I think 50 50 where.
You've got a point. Yeah, I think.
I think I'd have the potential against a wolf as well just because of the way I play for the MoDog and that.
I know how to stop him because I'll have a proper play for him and he'll bite me and everything.
So I know how to grab him off and that. You know, just pin him down or whatever.
So, you know, he's only a little bit smaller than a wolf.
Yeah, I think I think an honest would be a wolf. I think anything bigger than a wolf.
You know, all more vicious than a wolf, I would say.
Yeah, because then you start going to bears and yeah, no chance against a bear.
I would say a wolf might. And that be a story.
Well, a single wolf, not an alpha wolf then as well.
Well, the same as a lion and all that. Oh, no, fuck a lot.
The good thing was. Yeah, you know, I love seeing our videos as well.
It's the stupid idiots that think it's OK to poke the fingers through the cages, the lions and all that.
And there was another one the other week that I saw.
I think he's going into the enclosure.
So I don't know, try and pet the fucking lion.
And it's like, man, what are you doing? And it's just grabbed him, ripped his leg off.
And that's the woman's just there screaming. What?
And I'm going there in the past. Just fucking idiots.
But so I was I was just so what do you think your limit would be?
I'll see your fucking fuck up a point.
Obviously, yeah, when you got your giant anaconda and that, no chance of that. Yeah.
I think I'd have a chance against the lion. A lion.
I think. Yeah.
Not going to do it against a lion. Even cheetahs and then you have.
Yeah, I think there's just got too much jaw pressure.
I mean, hippos know, like rhinos know.
Yeah, I think I think of wolfies the one where you would.
If you had all them, you'd rather fight the wolf when you think.
Yeah, I mean, yeah, I mean, that's a solid answer as well.
Yeah. Always.
I mean, humans are part of the animal kingdom. Yeah.
Fuck up a lot of people.
Yeah, I'd say the wolf would be the limit.
Again, hyenas.
Yeah, but I got your power as well.
Isn't something just.
Yeah, it's the force of it. Yeah, the pressure of the.
I think hyenas have have got a decent.
Snatch one. Yeah, yeah.
Not saying a ball hasn't bought up. I'm just thinking.
Yeah, no, no. Yeah, I've just really put some points that you think there's a lot of dogs that were bred down the line.
So isn't the apex of the dog.
Yeah, a lot of breed. Yeah, yeah, no chance.
Yeah.
I don't want them ex-arbors.
That because in general, they're all softies anyway.
No, I saw you with that.
He was a Facebook status. Someone was saying, if you're the person that owns the dog that's just a bit more child, not one year old.
You ran off before.
Not one minute confusion trying to get the baby to calm down.
No, I wanted to say sorry or whatever.
And someone had asked, what was the dog?
And she was like, I don't know, just some small round dog, whatever. So that's on Facebook.
You posted whatever. It's not going to get blown up.
Whereas if it was a staff there, fucking bulldog or whatever, then it is fucking on the news and in the papers and stuff.
It's ridiculous.
It's more the dog than the breed. How is Paul?
Not the dog. Yeah, I'll get it a lot where people assume that mine's a fucking dangerous dog and that as well.
He still doesn't fucking do anything.
Where he was, there was two dogs in their own garden behind one of those electric gates.
And they were literally head out, bolting at mom.
And he's still just confused on what's going on.
I'm here to say hello, I want to play.
You're being aggressive. And these were almost like a little jackal.
So I don't know what you want.
It's the smaller dogs, they're the little fuckers.
There's a little chihuahua around the corner from mom and that as well.
Always give me 10 minutes. I'll boot the head off of you as well.
I would, I'd love to kick that dog.
I don't want to attack any fucking animals.
This one's always giving me large, it's in the window, fucking barking.
Yeah, probably because it's in the window.
No, no, because I've been, you know, we've been baiting this dog and it's still giving it as well.
And I'm like, no, no.
Because it's an old woman that owns this dog as well.
And the one time, I don't know if it was the sun or something, big lads walking this dog.
And obviously it's seen my dog, starts fucking giving it.
Fucking so picked up Jero.
I'm like, can I get away, get away?
Running away from this dog.
And the gays look at me all confused.
I'm like, dangerous dog, that is big.
Fucking sorting out.
It's not, you know, I'm doing it as a joke.
Obviously, mom wanted to, you know, I'll get him chopped, but I'll be bigger than this fucking dog.
So he eats it in one mouth.
But he just wouldn't, nothing fucking dangerous about him whatsoever.
He's always baiting the little dogs.
Just let them go on hard enough.
Ridiculous man.
Yeah.
Well, we've rambled on, we're going to give the one, would you rather?
There's been a lot of confessions.
Someone's saying maybe too much of a confession.
Well, I'm going to get some more.
I'm going to share it to you.
I'll text people.
When you're back, I'll get another collection for you.
I'll get new reactions on them as well.
And look, we said on the earlier, earlier in the podcast, any messages, emails,
you want to ask JD boys on his own, fire away.
Yeah.
As I said, it's going to be all over the YouTube.
Links will be in the description and that.
Yeah.
Send the emails in.
Send the questions or whatever.
Want some advice.
They can just say hello.
Fucking things the way it is.
But yeah, send them all in.
And obviously again, yeah.
Love, share, subscribe, download.
He's know what to do.
But we just want to remind you every now and again.
Yeah.
Love yous and leave yous.
See you next time.
Bye.