Welcome back to this week's episode of the Real Talk Podcast with your hosts Ash and
JD.
So I'm back.
But Yubi's just been a week at home but for us it's been two weeks.
Yeah I had a little trip away which I did say I was going on a day to everyone back
at home listening or watching on the YouTubes.
Yeah it was a nice little getaway but just felt like I haven't stopped still.
So with the Pro Day I didn't get there until late because I was working in London and then
Monday I had to head back to Birmingham.
Saw some stuff there for Mum, then back home and then back on holiday again.
It was just a lot of messing around.
I've not really sat down and done nothing anyway.
I always love to just go on the walk, set the dog out and that anyway.
So that's the one side but yeah it's just there was literally nothing else to do.
We were on a working part.
Literally nothing to do with TV.
It was a tiny little house.
I get it, the cottage thing that we were in wasn't designed for a younger couple to be
and so they're not expecting to give a decent size TV or at least a modern TV for people
to just sit there and watch shit on the TV or Netflix or whatever.
So it wasn't a portable but it was still a little 22 inch TV which had the old DVD slot
in the side as well.
Yeah.
Absolutely horrific.
So because I took the laptop and I was streaming, I had the HDMI lead connected to it which
I was surprised it actually had the connection because it had two SCART leads which for people
at home that don't know what a SCART lead is, it's an old version of a HDMI basically.
You'd have it running from your DVD or your VHS player into the TV.
We built a new PlayStation with the SCART lead.
Yeah.
So I had the laptop connected to it and I was basically just still watching the laptop
next to me because the TV was that small and I'm sitting a metre and a half away from it
and you're still struggling to see.
Literally I contemplated going and buying a TV just to have the...
Yeah.
...the screen to see if it was that small because it's not a smart TV but we're spoiled
these days, aren't we?
We're having all these luxuries.
Fair enough, the signal was good so I could just cast the hotspot on the internet from
my phone.
Even though they had Wi-Fi there, the password was wrong and there was no point in me asking
Valerie because she wouldn't have a clue how to sort it out or anything.
So yeah, I would just run my phone to the laptop, to the TV.
I old-schooled it a little bit for how I used to do things before smart TVs were a thing
but now, yeah, we are the spoil.
We just press your Netflix button or YouTube and it's just all there, isn't it?
It's too easy now, isn't it?
So yeah, there was that.
I'm not going to moan about that side of things because the owners aren't going to think about
that.
They're expecting people to be there and just going to be going on hikes or whatever around
the fields.
Oh, God, the beauty dog.
Well, there was two things that spoilt the actual venue other than the TV.
The beds.
The mattress itself burnt too badly, the pillows were just horrendous.
I just couldn't get comfy so I barely slept and then the shower was knackered.
So the water pressure was fine but the thermostat, you know, you have your knob that you turn
up and down for the temperature, that was knackered.
So it was just either a hot or screaming hot shower.
Now, I know for a lot of people, well, mainly women, it's fine because they just love the
shower where they're just getting melted on, but for me it was too much.
So after the first two showers of just barely standing underneath me back and forth, I managed
to just walk around, rip the life out of me and lower the temperature down.
You shouldn't have to do that.
The woman was saying that the plumber had got the right part but he couldn't fix it
and whatever and this and that.
I'm not going back home and getting me tools or fixing it myself.
He's got it but he just hasn't fixed it.
So I just don't know.
Yeah, so the pillows and the shower.
How come you didn't buy new pillows?
Because you were going to buy new TV.
I just sort of gave up with it.
Yeah, I didn't want to have to keep going into town because I ended up getting some
of my wellies, which again, because I'd left my wellies at home.
The ones that I bought were too void on the face.
So I would have had to buy about three or four pairs of socks to be able to walk in
them normally.
But I did end up going to Screwfix again anyway because I needed a charger, Lee, for my headphones
because I'd left that at home.
So I went to Screwfix to get one.
And then as I was in there, I saw Black Friday sale with some new work boots.
I thought, yeah, I'll grab them, 20 pounds.
I've been wearing them the rest of the week, just going out on the walks.
Which was sad, you know, on the muck trousers and all that.
There were spots on really.
But yeah, it's been a long week really.
You know, you feel like you haven't really had a home.
You go away to recharge, relax and recharge to go again.
Do you feel like?
Because it was the run around on the Monday that broke it off.
Obviously missed out most of the broad hours.
I didn't get there until 11 o'clock.
And to be fair, I've still had to organise jobs and that because people are asking me
questions, wanting to get decent that they've heard.
So I haven't properly been able to switch up.
You know, nearly Christmas.
I suppose I'll have a bit of a break over Christmas.
But I've not been in touch with what's been happening in the world last week anyway.
I don't think much has happened.
No, I think it's usual bollocks.
I know there's been more protests and crap going on.
So because we had to remember it's day last weekend.
Weekend of the weekend.
Yeah.
So it was the weekend of our last visit.
That's what I'm getting produced.
So I know there was a lot of kicking off because people wanted to go to the memorial sites
and stuff.
It's all nonsense.
Again, when I've been sitting on my phone, I've seen a couple of these videos, probably
some of these software, this chap, he does a hotel audit.
So it's just for his own YouTube videos.
He's got his chest GoPro on.
He has a hand out camera as well.
He keeps walking around these hotels that have got all the illegal immigrants.
Yeah.
Everyone security and that are just kicking off with him.
Yeah, I'm just walking around, just taking some pictures.
And then if anyone wants to answer a couple of questions, then I'm happy for him.
But no one does.
No one speaks to him.
And then it's just the security trying to tell him to do what he's like, no, but I'm
allowed to be here.
And if the police turn up, they're just going to tell me to leave.
So what are we going to do?
Just let me walk around and then I'll go.
Again, he's trying to do a public service.
But it's just adding fuel to the fire.
Yeah, we need to see really.
No, no, it's just it's not happening.
I mean, is he just going to use or sort of things?
I do know where the reason one of those hotels that I don't know the name of the hotel, but
it's forced before them.
It's a holiday.
So the one by the man of farm, but yeah, next door to them is now one of them.
Yeah, you see the security guards walking around.
Well, to be fair, the holiday, it's never really been a top brand.
No, I mean, you could just tell because every time you go, you see more of a cigarette outside
the streets, the guards then get them back in.
Yeah, because it could be easy when I'm in the net.
And that's it, which I'm sure some of them do, you know, if you've got a hotel full of
immigrants and you've got two people watching them, it's not hard.
No, no, it's not hard.
But again, I know that a lot of them do have the self day trips for them.
They'll take them out.
Well, they probably take to try a manner or something.
Or at least that's what we're led to believe.
Probably for training camps or something.
Or from the taxpayers expense.
Yeah, well, that's what Birmingham City Council skins the amount of hotels that they've set up.
It was something like.
I don't know, three hundred fifty thousand a week is what it was costing the council to
home all of these illegal immigrants.
The Birmingham City Council is just a fucking joke.
It always always always backwards.
Was it last year with the binge drugs?
Last year, the commentary as well, but I remember driving around Birmingham because
there'd been men run strong.
There was just mountains of big bags everywhere.
Because not everyone, but the majority of people still refuse to take the bags off to
the refugee centers, their centers, the resale consents.
I remember being near the blues ground and just because of all the bags that were being
shaved sold and absolutely horrendous.
I don't think Birmingham City Council got anything caught.
Just yeah, I'm sure a lot of people for their local councils think the same.
But you know, we say that.
So the mapping is where I've just been.
So it was classes.
No, ask them.
It's a little bit each.
They were quite.
Not.
Yeah.
Although 10 miles away from Sherwood Forest.
Robin Hood, just because people was like, I know there's some people that's like,
what is it?
We know it's the one from Robin Hood.
Yeah.
The real old Peter Pan.
So yeah, as you get off the A1 straight away, you've got average speed cameras along all
of the stretch of road.
And then the little village thing that I was in as well.
All fresh tarmac on the floor and all nice and clean.
It lacked having bins around.
To be fair, it was that small of a place.
You know, bins all over the place.
So which no larger than just carried the dog mess back to the to the cottage where it was at.
But it was just a night and day comparison.
It was looked at that not just the little bit that I was in the rest of the town where I was as well.
You know, all nice and clean.
No potholes anywhere or anything.
So essentially, the person that's the local mayor or whatever, he's obviously living there or she don't know.
And they actually know what needs to be done.
And they're looking after the place.
Whereas Birmingham and all that, the local mayors, they just don't care.
Yeah.
I've got a story about Birmingham City Council.
So I went over a pothole, popped my tyre, bang, popped.
So I got a new one and I emailed Birmingham City Council and says, or in a chat, I can't remember how it was.
I popped my tyre, I wanted to pay for it.
Yeah.
And I went, if you can take a picture of this pothole.
So what they wanted me to do is go to one of the busiest roads in Birmingham, stop all the traffic, take a picture of this pothole just to go that one.
Yeah.
Like, back in the mud.
It is stupid.
Just backwards.
Yeah, I'll stop all this traffic.
Yeah.
It's more dangerous me taking the picture.
They're all old.
I don't know if we bought it from one of the earlier episodes, but I remember there was a chat going around counting how many pot noodles it would take to fill up potholes.
So we'd be like, yeah, this one was 52 pot noodles and it's still not full and this and that.
Yeah, a bit of a waste of money, but, you know, he was getting his points across.
Not that it ever made a difference.
But there's still been a bit of controversy from what I have seen.
So Rishi sacked up that dozy pukka, the Home Secretary, where she was, I don't know what her name is, I wasn't planning on talking about it, but yeah, she was coming out with stupid stuff.
So there's the homeless crisis, which is everywhere.
There was a tent ban that she was trying to enforce.
So the homeless people couldn't have tents and any of these charities that give away free tents to the homeless as well were going to get fined.
So within a couple of days, she got sacked and David Cameron, former Prime Minister, he's been appointed now.
Then I saw the other day, so, you know, they're always having the meetings in the Commons, the House of Commons and that.
And David Cameron didn't turn up for the first one.
And then the last one that I saw yesterday, I think it was, when being asked what's going to happen to help towards the homeless crisis and the state of whatever town he was asking for.
Rishi didn't have anything to say.
And then David Cameron in the background says nothing's going to happen because it's a shit hole.
And so this chap obviously had a recording and he got the transcripts of the conversation and everyone's face when he's not finding the days.
But no one cares.
They just don't care. You know, I suppose the luxury of not being able to just press the Netflix on the TV this week.
I've had Channel 4 on, no, E4 yesterday.
And then there's a look at climate change adverts being put on.
But it's showing, obviously not real politicians, but these actors are portraying the politicians and it's not, they're just whipping up the trousers and showing oil stains on these big tight waltzes.
And then they're dancing around and that and stuff.
While we're soldering to work, these people are flying to meetings and this and that.
So it's true on that one side because they don't give a shit and they literally don't.
They're happy just taking all the money.
Yeah, I'm not sold as well.
I've got tools to carry, material to carry, crafts, real crafts.
Yes, it's...
No, sorry, I was going to say, once you start thinking politics and everything, as we've talked about before, there just seems to be no lighting at all.
There's always something going on.
I mean, two months ago it was Ukraine or Russia.
And there's nothing going on.
You don't hear it now.
And then obviously, you go back before that, it was all the heating crisis.
You know, it's just, when's it just going to level out, I suppose, and just get back to normal because I suppose there's not such thing as not having no drama going on.
You know, when we're going to, as well as as a society, just be happy, we with everything can have someone.
Well, yeah, you know what I'm saying.
Yeah, I can't ever see there being a time when there's someone in charge in Parliament that we're going to be happy with.
See, I know, I like Donald Trump for America just because...
He's coming to gold.
I think I believe everything he says.
So like when he was like, no, yeah, because I've done the war, because I'll ring up about the fact that we're putting, ring up for less gain, but like nothing's happening now.
And I believe, no, I do believe.
Because he believes what he says, that's what.
I think everyone believes what he says.
Yeah, you know, I did.
I saw the scandals that were trying to take his courts over, not ex-y'all, and said too many allegations on him. And as far as I know, all of them have been squashed because they're just trying to not have him back in power again.
I think for British politics, the problem is you have someone that goes to Cambridge, Oxford and Eaton College that doesn't understand real world problems, trying to tell real world problems, solutions, which, you know,
Richard Schoenig's never, I doubt he's ever walked down Hall Street.
Do you know what I mean? Do you get what I'm saying?
And for, that's what I'm saying, you know, so.
But it's like when there was the fuel crisis and then he's being featured, filling up a little, what was he, like a Picanter or Toyota, or Igo or something.
So that's not even your car for starters.
Oh, yeah, we're all in it together.
You know, you're a millionaire.
You're a millionaire. You've got a 150k job just running, just being the point.
I'm saying just being the point.
Well, you don't need the money.
Well, yeah, politics just like, oh, you know.
I never used to get involved in any of the conversations, but I think it's sort of since you turn 30, you have to start looking into it and finding out what's going on because it does start to affect you.
Yeah.
While we're younger and not really, well, we're paying bills, but we're not thinking about the future properly, the mortgage, whatever, and so you just don't really care.
I know what you did say, but Peter, I'll be, because I was saying about it before, it's another party.
Reform.
Reform UK.
That's the one.
I've seen it.
Yeah, I'll be on the phone somewhere anyway, but yeah, most of their policies look all right, to be fair.
They seem like the one to look after the UK citizens, changing tax, so you've got more of a threshold and sort of interest rates and whatever.
And so it just seems like they're trying to make, as Trump said, America great again, it's not the one to do the same for the UK.
So when it gets closer to, well, when we do actually have an election, I'll properly look into it and I'll start voting then.
The only other time that I felt a lot of voting was when all that UKIP stuff was going on, but I still never voted anyway, so I didn't pay too much attention on any of it.
It's just a madness.
As much as I keep playing it, I'm still not winning that lottery.
It seems like it's the only way out of it really, is just to get into some sort of money.
It's a de-carat angle.
One day, as the saying goes, you need to win it.
Well, that's it.
Yeah, I've missed out on everything this week.
I'm not saying anything has happened.
It's always negative anyway, I've been spoke by before, but I did hear something, just to get off the politics approach.
We don't want to depress everyone.
We're a real talking podcast.
So apparently, a message has been sent from out of Spanish.
Do you hear about that?
You know what? I slowly saw something, but I didn't actually look at any of it.
Literally, all I know is I was drawing in and then only turned the radio off.
I was like, damn, when has the music been? Because I'm fucking out of here.
I was trying to look for it, and I think it was unlad by, but I couldn't find it myself prior to the recording.
So apparently, you keep on top of the outing stuff there, mate.
Yeah, yeah.
There is some stuff that I did see, that I've got links for, that I do want to actually do some research for, and bring up on another episode.
Stay tuned for that. Obviously not today, but at some point in the near future.
We'll deep dive in it again.
Let's see.
Which reminds me again, we recently just had Halloween.
We're still waiting for someone else to send in their ghost stories, or if you've had any encounters of any kind, be it extraterrestrial or ghosts or anything.
Or mysteries.
Yeah.
Mysteries.
Mystery.
Scooby Gang.
But yeah, I don't know what episode it was now, but it's early doors.
We had an episode where we were talking about our ghost experiences.
So if you haven't already listened to it, I think it was like episode five, I remember, Rod.
Yeah, it was definitely five, six or seven. It was definitely one of those.
It wasn't number four, I remember number four was more.
It's when we used to have to re-plan an episode because we were the ones.
Well yeah, we didn't have any good fans, a lot of the few people that do EMR, but yeah, that's what we're getting to anyway.
Ghost, alien, or if you've got some theories, conspiracies or anything, you just do want to send our way.
Then links are always in the descriptions anyway, on YouTube, it's always bouncing around and that as well.
Email us in at realtalkingpod at gmail.com and twitter at Ash and JD.
Literally, yeah, if there's anything that you ever want to send us, then feel free.
So that does lead us onto some emails from our lovely fans.
Well, I'm assuming the fans are taking the time to email any place to the must be.
Right, so we've got Carl again. He was the one who asked the poop questions.
Right, so he has asked...
Didn't you ask him? No, so you asked him. Boy, he asked us that.
He's seen it on another podcast.
Yeah, so he's asked this time.
So you have five minutes to hold a paperclip in your house, then the police have got a date of holding it.
Now I have seen or listened to this question being asked before actually, but I've never actually thought about it.
So what it is, you've got a paperclip, which I'm sure everyone knows what a paperclip is.
Hold the paper clip together and you've got to find somewhere in the house, in your own home, to hide it so that the police can't find it.
Normally with the questions, it's like you win a million pounds or something if they don't find it.
Right.
I've tried it in times, yeah.
So I've never really thought about it before.
You can't really go for obvious places in log fittings or behind the socket places and stuff,
because you're going to check them, especially if the police are around in your house, they already know what you do.
So for me, they know that I'm on the tours, so they're checking those kind of places.
Everyone knows you're on the tours.
I've got the perfect idea, though.
I think I'm going to shock you with it.
OK.
Well, for me, I can't say, though, because I haven't got one.
I was thinking then, remember old school when we were kids, people would have those net curtains on.
Yeah.
And you have that wire that runs along.
I was thinking about sliding it in there, because that's basically like a long spring that's wrapped in a lot more plastic.
Yeah.
So I thought you could slide in there, but I don't have any nets.
So what I would probably do is then, where I've got the curtains.
Yes.
So obviously you've got your curtain pole, and then you know you've got your loops that the curtains actually go over.
I'd unravel the paper clip and try and wedge it through one of those there.
Right.
Because with my ones, it's metal loops.
So if I could hide it in there, even if they were using a metal detector, they're going to pick up the loop in there.
That's a good idea.
I don't think it's as good as my idea.
But my idea is seasonable.
Seasonable.
So my idea is, Ben's Christmas Trio, take one of the bulbs.
Your little bulb, yeah.
Yeah.
Take the top off.
You know, take the top off.
I don't know what the top is.
It's just the top, isn't it?
Yeah.
Take the wire out, put your paper clip, fold it, hang it back on the tree so it looks like the part of the bulb.
Yeah.
That is top tier.
Yeah.
Now, honestly, that's a good idea.
Yeah, it works for the season.
And it looks like some of them have the metal hooks anyway.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I mean, we just need your Christmas Trio, though, mate.
Yeah.
Within five minutes, you think you'd be able to carefully pry the lid off with a ball ball.
Yeah, because some of them you can twist quite easy.
Twist the little bulb.
It's still pressure.
I don't know.
It was on about the other week.
I don't really do the Christmas decorations.
So I think I've won that.
I think I've completed that.
Yeah.
I mean, obviously, if it ever needs a handbook, we're not going to choose those places because the police would listen to this and be like, hang on.
We've got, you know.
I've heard all sorts of them where, as I said, they'll hide it, they'll wrap it around the light bulb and then screw the light bulb back in.
OK.
If you do that, depending on what light bulbs you've got, the light on it will go bang.
They've tried putting them behind the socket for light switches, tried ramming them in the keyholes and stuff.
I think, you know, if you've got a team of police coming in and ripping everything apart.
Yeah, because they'll go fresh and go.
Yeah, yeah, they'll hold it eventually.
I mean, the easiest way would probably be, I know a lot of people at home wouldn't have a clue what I'm on about here now.
You know, you have your boxing for your soil stack.
Yeah.
Down part for your toilets.
They run up into the loft, David, in most houses.
So if I had enough time, get into the loft, go to where that is and just drop it down the gap.
So essentially, it's inside your wall cabinet.
Yes.
So they'd have to physically start making holes in the walls to be able to hold it there.
That would probably be the better place to hold it.
In order to get it up onto your roof, like for the Godfrey or something.
But if you only have like, you know, number one, if you only have like a quick or minute, like just a minute, I would just maybe put a set of keys as is.
Like, you know, the keys.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just yeah, well, yeah, I think probably the best.
Yeah, yeah.
If you can get enough leverage, there's obviously paper, paper, which are really low tech, man.
So trying to just throw it up onto the roof, that's going to be a problem.
But then I bet that there's some, like, it's only a bit of a problem.
That's not the game.
It's going to be inside the house.
Yeah, yeah.
So from where I'm looking at the moment, where you've got that bit of pod in there,
and if you pushed it down, it would be on the washing machine.
Yeah.
So yeah, but essentially boxing all that.
So you haven't got it in your kitchen, but you've got it that's your angle.
Yeah.
So if you get it into there, then you're happy.
Well, yeah, I mean, yeah, thanks for the email cards.
It's something to think about.
I mean, just have to put a couple of that.
I think I've won it.
Yeah, let us know when you would hold it.
I mean, I doubt it's going to be my idea, but you know, I've got to try it.
Yeah, yeah.
Impressive.
And yeah, obviously, thanks again for it.
Send us any more in if you've got as well.
We're open ears, always for reading as well.
Well, we've got another one from Lauren as well.
So these toys in similar to what we've just been saying.
So we've Halloween all done.
And Christmas is right around the corner.
What do you love most about Christmas?
Oh, for me, for me, it's Christmas lights.
You know, you're just driving around, you see like Christmas lights, especially when you was a kid.
And I don't know, for me, dad used to pull us in the car and just drive all around looking at Christmas lights.
I used to be like in a bento.
I remember just going on a bike ride or whatever.
You just see all the lights.
I remember there was the one lad from our school, you know, we'd leave up the road.
Oh, you mean the charity thing where you had to go in and get the one you want.
I don't know about that.
Yeah, on the right, I'm sorry, did you go to all the big decorations outside anyway?
The one thing I've always wanted to do is go to America for Christmas.
Yeah, I mean, New York, obviously, I'd be great.
You know, I'm going to go to the suburbs and go all out.
Yeah, because they have the big houses, big front gardens, all the proper displays.
And they also have this thing where you drive your car around and you can see all these Christmas lights.
I don't know what you'd actually call them.
So you drive somewhere and they've made like, it'd be like, I don't know, like 15-minute drive.
But all through the drive, there's like Christmas lights.
So like a little Christmas lights.
So it's sort of like a drive through winter on the land.
Yeah, yeah.
So that looks pretty cool.
I don't think people would do it here.
I've never heard.
That'd be cool to do if it was.
Yeah, so for me, it'd be Christmas lights.
What about you?
I mean, as an adult, it's the cooking of the dinner, then having the dinner.
Because I love the cooking and that anyway.
So yeah, that's the main thing of Christmas these days for me.
It's just getting in that kitchen, have a little bit of breakfast and then living a full roast Christmas dinner.
I love it.
Yeah, just, I know it's not always nice to feel completely stuffed that you can't eat or drink anything else, but I love it.
It's just the one time where it's acceptable to just keep eating and eating.
Even though you still forget the quality street.
Yeah.
A bit of a Russia or whatever.
To be fair, it's a good Christmas tree.
Good Christmas tree as well.
So in general for you, it's the decorations.
Yeah.
Also, I think we should bring tinsel back as a thing.
I think tinsel should be a thing again.
I'm willing for that to come back around.
Well, I'll have to take you to my dad's then because they've still got the ones from the 70s.
Literally.
I mean, it comes back, everything comes back around.
Yeah, yeah.
It's gonna come back.
They still put up the literally old ones where it's the gold, red and green ones.
The classic colours.
Yeah.
The things from the ceiling as well.
Yeah.
Classic.
The green, gold and red classic combo.
I know a lot of people have the silver and blue now.
Yeah.
Which, you know, is not my thing.
But it just, to do that, just to try and keep with the feng shui of the living rooms and
everything.
What's your thoughts on a white Christmas tree, Joe?
Well, again, yeah.
For me, it's controversial.
I don't like it.
It is.
But if you pretend that it's just a green tree covered in snow, then, you know, it's
big brain thing.
I mean.
It's all a part of trying to keep it in tune with the way that your house is decorated,
isn't it?
That's what most people do before these days.
You know, it's because there was a little phase of everyone having black trees as well,
weren't there?
Which I know you can still buy the black ones.
Yeah.
You know, when we was kids, everyone had all the houses were painted the same.
Every wall was magnolia.
So a green tree with your gold, red and green tinsel.
It didn't look out of place.
Also, let's just take a minute just to appreciate the fact that our calendars used to run to
New Year's Day.
They did, didn't they?
Yeah.
I mean, you'd have a box in the back.
So you'd have all your regular pieces.
Christmas day used to be a big piece.
Then underneath, you used to have a little run there.
So New Year's Day, another big piece now.
It's just Christmas Eve.
But not even after Christmas Day?
No, no, Christmas Eve, I think more of it runs too.
I hadn't had an advent calendar for years.
The missus bought some the other day.
So they're sitting there on the TV, ready to get started in a couple of weeks.
But then Sunday night, I was, I don't know, we had whatever crap on the TV.
And I was just flicking through TikTok and I saw this woman advertising a cheese advent calendar.
Cheese advent calendar.
Yeah.
So there's little cheeses, crackers, some different old chutneys and whatever.
I guarantee that gets sold in M&S.
Probably does.
But the main shop that was selling it was like £4.
I've only got £36.
You've got one?
Yeah, yeah.
Fuck you now, man.
You doing alright, don't you?
Oh yeah.
Fuck you now.
It's not been a bad year.
Fuck.
For Canada.
Fuck you.
No, it's just bad.
Fuck you now.
Does he go to New Year's Day for that?
I've not gone yet.
Fuck you, Canada.
I didn't expect it to get delivered so quick.
So they tried to deliver it on Tuesday, but obviously I wasn't at home.
Then they tried to deliver it this morning.
And again, it was like an hour before I was getting home, pretty deep-eaty.
So they've dropped it off at the co-op, so I've got to go pick it up on the way home.
Well yeah, it's mad because as a kid, the only cheese I would eat would be on a pizza.
But now I'll happily just snack on some cheese.
I'm not a baby-bath fan.
I'll have it if it's the only cheese we've got and I really want cheese.
But I'll just happily get a nice camembert or get a brewery.
I've not pushed myself out too much with getting any of the blue cheese or anything.
Because I know a lot of cheese, it's not necessarily the smell.
The funkier it smells, the better it tastes apparently.
But I do love to have a cheeky bit of gouda from time to time.
So I would never have seen myself getting a cheese advent calendar.
Even just five years ago to be fair.
But I'm quite partial to having a little cheese board tea and that kind of stuff.
A couple of little bits of cheese, some ham, some meat and that, some crackers and whatever.
So yeah, I'm looking forward to that one to be fair.
So for the first time in years I'll be having a little bit of chocolate and some cheese every day.
Wow, cheese and chocolate.
Could be a new thing.
Well, thank you for your email. I was from Laram, wasn't I?
Yeah, sorry, we went up 110.
Well, I'd just like a moment to appreciate kids nowadays
not having an advent calendar that runs to New Year's Day.
I wonder if he's really much of a bean.
Do kids still really get advent calendars?
Yeah, they're just expensive.
You get the cheese one.
I even saw a Pokemon card one.
So every day you get a booster pack or a promo card or whatever.
It's Christmas Eve again.
I would just like one that runs to New Year's Day.
I can't guarantee that costs about 20 quid just for your standard dairy milk.
One runs to New Year's Day.
That was the thing as well.
They used to be your good quality reasonable products.
So like you say, your dairy milk and whatever.
You used to get those ones.
I mean, I don't go looking out for them to be honest,
but is that still the way it is or is it just cheap chocolate ones now or something?
No, I've got a Nes.
Nes, man?
Yeah, yeah.
Again, as when we were kids, that was a good quality of chocolate.
So it's nice, but then what did you pay for that?
What, six pounds or something?
Yeah, I think it was six pounds.
I remember they literally used to be a pound.
Yeah, yeah.
And this one I'm saying, honestly, it's a New Year's Day as well.
And you had games in there.
You had little games on the back.
Fuck you, man.
But you think, obviously, it happened with the Easter eggs and that.
They changed the packaging so there's no plastic in it.
You can put your risococcal cardboard and stuff.
But it's cheaper to make them and yet they still charge more for it.
Inflation, ridiculous.
Also, the pain when you open the afro calendar and your chocolate's fell at the bottom.
But then it's like, what do you do?
Do you risk opening the other days to get it out?
You can shake it. You know it's there.
No, because what I used to do was just open the bottom and then just...
Put it out?
Yeah, yeah.
No, you can see what pictures are normally with chocolates.
No, because once you open the bottom, all the top...
Yeah, because sometimes it catches though.
Yeah, but you just give it a little bit of a shake.
But then you don't know where it's falling.
It might fall on the floor and then you blast it there.
How big's your floor that you're going to lose a little piece of chocolate?
No, five seconds. I mean, because it's fell on the floor, innit?
Five seconds, all kid.
True.
Don't think you're not quick enough, then.
You know, obviously, be careful if there's dog around.
Dogs can't eat chocolate.
Yeah.
Never really had that issue.
I didn't know I had an issue with that thing.
I think it was just in step with my life.
Well, yeah.
I remember, I don't know, like 18 or something.
And you know when you hit that point with left school?
And your mum stops buying you one?
To be fair, I mean, even the last time mum got me Easter eggs,
I didn't get none of them because she ate them herself.
Oh, no, no.
So, yeah, you know when we left school, it's like, hang on.
I can literally just buy whatever I want.
All the stuff that I wanted that mum and dad couldn't afford.
I've got money. I can buy whatever shit I want.
So I remember, like, I was 18 or whatever.
Just buying myself a load of advent calendars
and essentially going through one in a week.
Yeah.
Yeah, because it's not, I'm an adult.
Just free open any door you wanted as well.
Yeah, I mean, to be fair, once I'd started eating them,
I'd open it in order.
But just not on the actual day.
So it'd be like the 12th December
and I've just came through half a fucking month
to put the advent calendar.
But you know, for adults, we don't have to have
just one little piece of that.
You don't have to pay for the rules.
Yeah, so we make the rules.
So yeah, cheers.
Cheers for that.
And then we've got another one from Carster.
So Holly Ash and JD.
No dating updates.
So she's not back on the market yet.
Well, probably used, but nothing to report anyway.
So she asks us the question,
if you could live anywhere in the world, where would it be?
Right, OK.
Is this, this is the thing, I suppose we should do
one where we've been so you can say,
I want to live there and one where I haven't been
and want to live there.
Yeah, I mean, we could do that.
Because obviously, yeah, let's do that.
Do you want to go first or do you want me to go?
Well, if you've got someone somewhere.
No, I haven't.
I mean, for me, if it wasn't so we're going to base it on that
money's not really an object.
So we're not going to have to worry about that.
It's not necessarily like in Dublin.
It's because it's overpopulated.
The majority of most built up town centres and that.
But, you know, when you're going out into the outskirts
and that's beautiful, just fields everywhere
and that nice and quiet in general.
You know, obviously, there's always the fear of,
you know, the IRA or whatever.
But you can have that sort of threat anywhere in the world,
something potentially going on.
So you don't have to think about those bits.
Yeah, just staying in the sticks, you know,
farm or something over there and say,
if you ain't got to worry about the money or whatever,
then yeah, be sound.
Because again, at least if it was Ireland as well,
it's not too far to just hop on a ferry,
come back and see everyone back at home and that.
Otherwise, somewhere that I've always sort of fancied is Alaska.
Just in the wilderness.
Yeah, just out there.
Isn't it mad as you, when you're young,
you want to be surrounded by people,
but then the older you get, you just want to just be left alone.
Yeah, I'm open to that.
I mean, I've been walking for a long time, to be fair.
I'm happy to just fucking, just doing my own thing,
just sitting there, either watch one of the programmes
or I want to watch it or whatever,
or just going out for a walk,
just being able to do what I want
and not having to worry about,
oh, I've got to go see someone, so I've got to be here at this time or whatever.
But it's because I'm always busy in general anyway,
so when I do get the chance to be able to switch off, I love that.
But yeah, if I could get off,
I mean, I know I'm contradicting myself
from what I started off saying about the luxuries of your smart TVs and all that.
So if we could incorporate that,
I'm obviously hoping that I've got a good internet connection
so I can still get onto the Netflix and all that.
And yeah, just out in the sticks.
Yeah, with your home comforts, but out in the sticks.
So you've got the best of both.
You've got everything that you need, technology,
but you've got your own space as no one, boy.
Yeah, I probably do.
What about the weather though, mate?
Well, I don't mind it being cold though, do I?
Yeah, but it's different, mate.
Well, that's a part of the joy of it, then,
because if you're out in the cold for a good few hours during the day,
then you're long-fired Bernie when you get back.
Right. When I went to Canada and I went to Niagara Falls,
I remember it being minus 16 plus wind chill.
Mate, that's fucking... it's cold.
Yeah, I'm not saying I wouldn't be walking around in my shorts or T-shirt.
I did that the other morning, not in my T-shirts,
but I had my shorts, I had my boots on, I had shorts, T-shirt and just a hoodie.
And I've got everyone, all the locals that were there,
fucking just walking past or driving past, all looking at me like I'm fucking crazy.
And it wasn't even that cold.
I mean, I think it was like 11
and it was a little bit winter, but you know, it weren't too bad.
But everyone else when they're walking around,
they've got all the North Face stuff on, the proper hiking gear and that,
there's me just in a tracksuit and I just can't get uncomfy or warm.
It's cold. But yeah, you just get the mad logs.
Obviously you're not from around here, though.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, so...
So to somewhere you've been would be Ireland,
and then somewhere you haven't been would be Alaska.
Yeah. So how about in Southam?
For me, somewhere I've been would be California.
No border's safe.
So when we went to California, we started off in San Francisco,
then made our way through San Diego.
San Diego.
So it's a fair few miles.
Well, as you drive and you see all these picturesque towns,
you know, like your hallmark, you know, the old towns,
where you could be on hallmark movies, you know, like those quaint little towns,
population of about 2000.
Yeah.
And I remember seeing this one place,
and I can't remember for the life of me what it was called,
and it was surrounded by mountains all around, like three sides of it.
And then when you go up the mountain, then you look down onto it,
and it's just got a massive lake,
and the town just goes around like a circle around the lake as well.
So it was really nice.
It was like, it was just a small town,
but you could see the whole town like grew around the whole lake,
so that the lake was the center point.
And as we played it like that, when you see that sort of layout,
you can imagine how it was before it all got, you know, mud and all this.
Yes.
So it would have just been literally like little pots or just stick tents and that,
and people would be foraging and fishing out the lake and stuff.
And then over the time, it started to build and build to what it is now.
Yeah, and I mean, it was like, it was just crystal blue.
I mean, it was just like the most perfect thing I've seen.
I didn't go into it, I was six, we was going to Ades,
but from my point of view, looking down from the valleys into it,
it looked really nice.
Weird thing, I remember about that journey,
I think it was like an hour or so later, you end up driving through a European town or Danish town.
So I don't know why the middle of California is like Danish or Bavarian style town.
It's strange because you know, it looks like you're in here in California.
But if I could live anywhere now, probably be somewhere hot.
I would have to say somewhere, not like Ibiza, but like a town or in an island,
just so, you know, Mallorca, you know, just somewhere like that.
You don't want it too hot though, do you?
Because I've moved in South West.
That would rave in that.
No, I think I, no, that's how I do it, I want it now.
You want it like that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Just, just, but then you have your home conference, you know, you get the air,
but I just.
I suppose, yeah, it did not, because when we was there, the aircon,
in the Bono hotel you had to pay for.
The aircon was shitty as well.
Yeah, yeah.
But it was, yeah, when I was in Poland, we had the aircon in them rooms,
and it was fucking sweet.
Yeah, I'm saying that.
Cyprus, that, it was over.
When we was there, it was like a big day.
I went there again, and he didn't seem as hot as he was,
but I don't know if it was just a heat wave when we went there that one time,
because he was.
It was summertime as well, don't you think?
It was desert.
But yeah, so somewhere like I would be from New York at, maybe Corfu.
Corfu's in Orland, isn't it?
Yeah.
So you know, like there was Mediterranean, something like that.
That's for me now.
Or a wife in the policy.
Well, yeah, yeah.
We're too hot for that.
Yeah.
But then it'd be nice, like, you know, if you get on here,
if you have family come over, friends, you can go to the policy.
Yeah.
So again, you're still close enough.
Yeah.
To just toggle down there.
That's right.
Yeah.
Just imagine I'm just waking up, having a coffee, see this city.
That'd be nice.
Yeah.
No?
It's good.
Well, they've all been good questions, actually.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I think I need Naly with the paper quick.
I think I fucking smashed that.
Honestly, I'm so proud of myself thinking of that idea on the spot.
I mean, saying that, you don't.
Soon you're going to have plenty of different places you'd be able to hold them in anyway.
Like different little tories or whatever.
Yeah.
So yeah.
I mean, after that last one, it makes me fucking think I can't buy it for my next other day now.
Yeah.
Which that's in March again.
The thing is, obviously, you don't, because you've got the dark, it's hard.
Yeah.
I know I've got a dark, but obviously, because Shira is such a big dark.
Yeah.
I enjoy just going, staycations is what the corner is, when you're staying within the UK.
Have you ever thought maybe getting the ferry to Orleans, I can.
I was looking at doing it earlier on in the year.
But it was the accommodations, the other side of the island, nothing close enough for us.
And it's a nightmare when you're driving.
So it'd be a couple of hours driving to get to the ferry.
I don't know what it would be like on the ferry.
And then still again, it was like a five or six hour journey to where these little houses and whatever work were on.
I'll be honest, only not for some two hours.
So that's why it didn't happen.
But yeah, I probably will do it at some point.
Yeah, because as I said, where it does be similar in a sense to the vast majority of Orleans, where it was just built farms and that around.
So yeah, that's sort of being, I'm happy just doing that.
Yeah.
You're right in saying that, because whenever I go away, all I think about is obviously our fjalladog.
And I asked my mum, because he stays at our mum's, I asked for updates.
Yeah.
Yeah, even when to the next one, that's back in March again.
And yeah, it's nothing special, just a little caravan on a day log.
Well, they're all classes lodges now, but they're just caravans.
But yeah, that'll be the same.
It will be as soon as you exit site, I'm on the beach.
I'll be doing that again, up in the morning, go for a little walk along the beach, man, in the back.
And then get back, chill for a bit.
And then I'm just happy going out, just walks all day long.
Also, sorry, just in reflection to the question about where, like Lynn, so we'd be California, maybe toy.
I know San Francisco is in there, but if I have to live in a main city, San Francisco,
just because I was just reflecting, I had a good time and said, wait, it's a shit like that.
Have you seen what's happened in San Francisco?
I haven't.
Mate, I don't know why.
When I went there, there was shit loads of harmless people.
I remember you saying, yeah, yeah.
But I mean, mate, shit loads.
I thought it was just in the movies, you turn the corner, you're in this nice street, skyscrapers, you bang your left.
Just fucking tense, mate, like fucking.
It is literally like a whole road, just tents, trolleys, shopping carts, sleeping bags and all sorts of things.
So basically, the change law in California.
So if you rub something under the bar, you rub a thousand dollars.
It's not a felony.
So basically you don't end up doing jail time.
Yeah, they don't even call the police today.
No, no. So what people have started doing is leaving their doors, so like, you know, like on the jeeps.
Yes, you've is like the boot open and what?
What did the nice?
So just so people wanted to rub the cars and then smash up the windows to look for stuff.
Because while a lot of people is doing smashing windows and going through cars, so a lot of people leaving the cars unlocked and the windows down.
Just so people can just go in, basically go in the car and see there's nothing worth rubbing.
Yeah.
I mean, I couldn't.
And what people have started doing shops selling the chocolate bar and a thousand dollars.
But when you go to the sale, you get a discount of like nine hundred ninety five dollars.
Just about. Just so when it happens, they get a penalty.
It literally is not known for not, you know, dollars.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Anything.
That's yeah.
So like one cents under a thousand dollars.
You don't charge.
Yeah. So they have these people which I think I don't know.
I mean, I don't know if I would do it.
Just running into certain stores, rubbing a handful of shit and just running out the store, knowing there's no jail time.
And let's be honest, if you run into a store, take a handful of shit run off.
You're not going to be a priority for the place.
If if it's not a family.
Sorry. Yeah. Sorry.
It's my speech.
But yeah, I always thought so now it I mean, it was pretty bad.
Then in terms of the homeless people, I'm not a read on it all because I think they've got a G7 or they've got something going on where there's got world leaders going out or outwardly.
Or is it a few was just trying anyway.
So they've got rid of all the homeless people and put like these fancy like barricade things or well, my.
Yeah. So yeah.
Yeah. Well, that's just going back on the thing for a sec.
So before coming here, as I told you, I went just to nip to the shot.
But a new bloody smoke detector.
While I was standing at the till waiting to get served, there was two of the home bargain staff that come running past me.
One of them, I thought, you know, the little headsets, the old Britney Spears one, you know, come running past me.
I didn't know what was going on because I've got my headphones on.
I'm just trying to listen to me podcast off, not paying attention.
And so I've turned around, I've seen other people staring to the run out the front, turned out this woman had literally gone in, build a big bag.
You know, the bags that you get for Christmas that people just put all the stocking fillers in a big bag full of God knows what was in there and just walk back out, sort of walk back out the entrance.
So they've obviously seen around the counter.
I know because I pop me head so I can just see past the pillar in between the window. Yeah, I'm sitting at the literally just open the car door, grab the bag.
The woman's got out of the car.
And I don't know what was being said.
There was a bit of exchange words and yeah, just walk back into the shop with the bag of the sod and stuff.
Yeah, just I was just standing there laughing.
You saying that I saw this woman did it like fucking a great thing.
So she had a push chair, and you know what's the push chairs underneath you have like a little basket.
Yeah, that's where you meant to put lucky nappies.
That's where you and trust me nappies and milk was going in there, but it was covered with a coat.
So what she would do like the cheap stuff like I don't know she'd boil like, I don't know wipes, not antiseptic wipes.
I mean, I put them on top of the like, push chair.
She's a sprawl of four items, but she had about 20 items in this basket just covered it with a coat.
Scan the four items for quick walk with about 30 quid's worth of stuff.
Honestly, I couldn't believe it.
I saw just on there like, oh, it's something I would want to do.
But I know if I did, I get caught.
I don't want to get caught because I can afford it.
But it's just like, I want to do it just to try and let it just to see if it's that easy.
So is the word braising that the word?
Braising, yeah.
Just so like big balls, ain't it?
Just no fucks.
Yeah, yeah.
It reminds me now that because I mean, you see that sort of thing all the time with a snake, a couple of things.
I mean, I mean, we've all done that thing where you go to the South check out and you've got two twixies and this one above the same.
You know, so one comes off.
Well, yeah, well, a lot of them now because it's weighted, so you can't put it in the bag.
Well, yeah, I know what you're saying.
I remember when I was a kid, you know, I don't know.
Well, yeah, they must still do it.
You get the little magazines and you get the little toys in them.
Yeah, yeah.
They're like about 10 quid now.
I can't say I was supposed to.
Do you know those ones where you have to wait every week to build like something?
Yeah, yeah.
So like.
Yeah, first issue would be like £1.99.
And then after it would be like £4.99.
Yeah.
Yeah, yeah.
So yeah, I bet they're about £10 quid now.
I wouldn't be surprised.
But I remember it wasn't all the time, but it would be.
I'd be in the trolley and obviously you've got the seat for a child.
Mum would give me one of those little magazines with a little toy in it.
And then I'd have to basically sit on it to hold it as we got to the tills.
So that would be me as well not so shy, but a part of the theft that was going on.
Guilty boys association.
Yeah.
So, but you know, times are hard when we was kids, man.
Fucking you know, that was just something just to make me happy that I was getting the
seat for free, you know, she'd always grab like a hand to pick a mix and I'd be chewing
on them while walking around Aster or whatever.
You know what, that was the worst thing, you know, as a kid, as a kid, I remember walking
in Audi, and this is when Audi used to be really on call to shopping.
I mean, anyone over the age of 30 knows that Audi was not a place to go.
You used to get slag for shopping in Audi.
Yeah.
It was even that song.
Now that was all right, but anyway, do you remember the song?
Your mama's got no money, your daddy's on the door, so she's going that Audi to Rob
and Salsa Drol.
That's the one.
Yeah.
The worst thing I've ever seen in Audi is grapes and people are walking past and pinching
them on the front.
Like it's just a fucking grave.
Yeah.
Fucking hell.
Like literally you go to the section, it's just stalks of them.
Yeah.
Look, what the fuck?
No wonder they have to now obviously they have the plastic covering on it.
Yeah.
I ain't surprised that's what they had to do something about that.
That was fucking ridiculous.
Yeah.
I mean, we started off in politics, now we're in a bad Audi.
Yeah.
Oh, well, so either way we're getting robbed.
Yeah.
I don't think it's cheap.
I don't think Audi is a cheap alternative.
No, no, no.
No.
So that's why in general, I still think of Aztec because I'll use my words.
I was on the side of your cheese board, mate.
It's M&S or White Rose, Eddie.
No, no.
I was just talking about Aztec and Audi.
Yeah.
So yeah, there is a couple of online shops that I have bought cheese from as well.
And then butchers for me.
They could put a pie in the butchers, don't they?
Yeah.
Have you ever went into M&S to do a shop?
Not for a shop.
No, I've been in love while I'm working.
I just go grab a meal deal.
Right.
One time we went in there.
Sushi.
Two bottles of coke.
Port boy.
It was like 20 quid.
I was like, whoa, I'll be back.
I'll be back, mate.
I couldn't do that.
I remember.
Sorry, this was like, this was when stuff was cheap.
Yeah.
No, I couldn't have that.
I remember when I used to have a weekend job with no subs.
There was a, I think it was a Science Breeze.
It was round the corner for me.
Sometimes if I wasn't having a free sub from the shop basically,
I'd go up there and just grab something from there.
But as you walked in, as with most of them,
you have your meal deal section at the beginning of.
So I'd go in, I'd grab a bottle of coke or something.
I'd crack it open while I'm walking around and just drink.
Yeah, classic ones.
Yeah, and then just walk out and give me a hand.
I used to do that.
We used to walk to, I don't know what we used to do,
just walk to Marisons from the old house,
which was like an half an hour walk.
So when you walked in, the month, and then you drink with Straleigh,
crack open one, walking crack open one,
buy another one to put in the basket for the meal deal.
There you go.
But I think everyone, there's just some stuff.
There's just some stuff that, you know, it's illegal,
but it's in the eyes of the public.
It's, you know, it's acceptable.
We've all done it.
I remember one time, my dad robbed some fuel.
I don't understand why you don't do it with the American way
where you pay for how much you've got to use beforehand.
Yeah.
The petrol station's not there now.
It's the one that used to be up the poor way.
This was years ago, mate.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
So it filled up, filled up.
It was just trying to fuck off.
OK, now.
See, again, years ago, you'd be out of the five.
It's not cameras and no...
Well, even if they had the cameras, it's fucking...
Like, now all of them have got the IMPR systems and that.
So as soon as you go in, you're playing the scan,
so you can't do nothing.
It was funny because my dad sent my mum in there
the week after that to see if there's no...
Remember when shops used to do, like, people at the store from there?
Yeah, they'd have the picture and all the stuff.
Yeah, they'd have the red just in case they got it on the pixel.
Yeah.
Fuck you, that. Yeah.
Good old days, eh?
Yeah.
So, yeah, on that controversy, then, we'll call it a butt.
And, yeah, just a reminder, as you already know,
but, yeah, launch, yeah, download, all that jazz, email us.
I was going to say text, then, but you can't text.
So I'm going to give you my phone number.
To be fair, if you really wanted it,
it's on some of the episodes when I'll be wearing a work T-shirt,
so I couldn't get it in text.
Right, you can't get it in text.
There's some games out there that's going back just to do it.
Yeah.
I've already thought...
No, I think there's people that would know anyway, wouldn't there?
Yeah.
So, yeah, whatever.
Yeah, just email us, Twitter, whatever.
You know what the score is.
Yeah, also, thank you for all your emails.
Yeah, we always appreciate it.
And all the downloads and all the streams.
We really appreciate it.
Yeah.
So thank you for that.
Right, we will see you next week, then.
Peace.