Hi everyone and welcome to this spooky episode of the Real Talking Podcast with your host
Red Skull and whatever the bob piece is.
So it's Halloween and we're all fucking very scared.
Scared of little bastards knocking on the doors.
Literally I was gonna say the same thing. The only thing we're scared of is the door
bar keep going.
Mate I'm gonna get a little hug later.
Thank you.
So since it's the season.
You're not a horror film fan are you?
No no.
It's no point asking your favourite horror film.
No no I mean for me mate.
I mean I've spoken about it before on here and they're just driving me crazy because
they're all the same.
Like not in terms of you know there's different mood but I mean yeah it does nothing for
me.
I find them boring quite funny.
I don't get it.
Well that's the thing with the majority of the ones that all do load watching is just
because they're funny.
They're hilarious.
I remember when we was in school.
I think we were 12 or 13 and it was the first time The Exorcist was being put onto national
TV since it was released in the cinemas.
Yeah.
And it was all I don't know 11 o'clock at night.
I remember sitting up with my sister to watch it.
I just laughed my head off the whole time.
Blair especially with all the energy starts projectile bombing it over you.
Yeah.
It's fucking quiet.
It's what I said before about Jeepers Creepers.
If you see someone throwing a body or something conspicuous down a well or something you just
ignore it and just fucking carry on.
Yeah.
Go tell someone they can do something about it.
Yeah.
And then just carry on.
Yeah.
But yeah I mean yeah for me.
I've got to take these off.
I can't see anything.
Yeah.
Fucking hell.
Well that's the end of the Hannaway special.
But as a kid growing up I enjoyed watching the Freddy Gruber films.
In general they were scary enough because I was a child but I just found it so funny.
He was just comical.
The one line as he'd come out with and then just the stupidness his arm stretching out.
Yeah.
You know the first one was the first movie role for Johnny Depp as well.
Right.
Young pre-alcoholic amber herd drama Johnny Depp.
And it's loosely based on a real life story.
So.
What a real life character.
Not character it was an actual person.
Where they didn't differ on the name.
His name literally was Frederick Kruger.
Sounds German.
Yeah I don't know where he's from to be honest.
But obviously he wouldn't actually go into people's dreams because that's not a real
thing that you can do.
But he was a hypnotist.
So he was a part of a circus and he would go all around and stuff.
And over the years he just built up his technique to be able to hypnotise people.
And obviously what you see when they get him to do stupid things.
So they'll walk around pretending they're a duck or barking like a dog.
He started off with them things.
And then gradually got more skilled with it.
But basically there was a woman that he was madly in love with.
But she was like nah don't want to do it.
You're a waste man.
Hypnotiser then she's mine.
That's basically what happens.
So after nagging and nagging he finally got her to come to one of the circus shows.
And then obviously got picked around and cried.
It's a hypnotiser.
And obviously it's going to get a little bit graphic now.
So if you're a bit squirmish, tough shit.
So he ended up hypnotising her.
But not blatantly doing anything in front of all the people.
He essentially just got subliminally put a message in to make a meet up with him after everyone had gone home and that.
And so then he could pull her back under again.
He ended up raping her numerous times and eventually killed her.
So that's where the premise of, or one of the possible premises of the film come from.
They're essentially because hypnotism is going into her sleep.
So that's where the dream nightmares come from.
And yeah, Freddy Krueger and his legend started off from there.
I mean how many films are made of that to be fair?
It's quite an ongoing saga really.
Yeah, I haven't watched any of them.
You've missed out man.
Not even Freddy vs Jason.
So Jason being out of her team.
Yeah, because he crosses it off at the end doesn't he?
Yeah, I watched that by issue as well.
Jason, that's who he wants.
Because that's who would think, when they get him down and they all run out.
You've got him down, you've got him trying to kill you.
When was the last time you had a bad dream?
Well...
And isn't it funny, sorry, when you're a kid your bad dream is something so stupid.
Yeah, it's been a while since I've had an actual bad dream.
But I used to have a recurring sort of a nightmare.
So when I grew up fucking 4th degree, it was like I'd be running up the road into town.
And do you remember near the old mailbox, body NIA, there used to be this big statue thing.
I don't know what it was, but I just remember it was like a big dirty white statue.
And people would get up and stand in between it and that.
But anyway, that ended up being in the dream.
But essentially I was in the dream, I was being chased by the kind and the undertaker from the old WWF.
And it was just, I don't know what...
I'm with the NIA as well.
I remember that statue trying to hide in between it.
I remember as a kid going into town and just jumping up on it and walking in between all the people, whatever the fuck it was.
But yeah, it was like I'd try and hide from them in that bit.
And I don't know what, because I was never scared of the undertaker or anything as a kid.
That was just the scary, they're after me, I'll hide here.
Fucking weird.
But it was a nightmare.
I don't know, I've not really had any nightmares.
How about yourself?
No, no.
I mean sometimes my fantasies to me, like I shit up in the middle of the night when I've been star-lost.
Lose my breath.
But I can't even back dream or anything.
I mean quite often I'll still have the stupid ones when you've just fallen asleep.
And you feel like you've fallen.
Yeah, you trip over and you fall over and you give the whole body a jolt.
Fucking so annoying that is, especially when you can't feel it and you start on yourself.
And you do really like, you're in the middle of the bed like, I ain't going nowhere.
It's a fall.
To me, it's more likely for me to fall off the bed.
Because even though I've got a king size, I'm always on the edge of the bed.
Because the missus will either sleep in the middle or I've got the fucking dog up and down off the bed.
And he fucking steals the space.
But even last night, when he's gone on the bed at one point.
And I remember giggling to myself because you know when you see on the films or the TV programs,
the tape drawing of a dead body on the floor.
And it's always like the legs are separated, one knee is bent and the arms are out.
I was literally like that essentially.
The arms, the right arm is underneath my head.
Touching the wall essentially because I was lying on it as well as the pillow.
Then my left arm is tucked up, holding the blanket.
Because if I don't hold it when it's cold, the missus will take all of it.
And because with the dog getting on, he gets on and he pulls it off me as well.
And then literally the one knee is up towards my chest, the other leg is out right.
And the dog is just lying in between my legs.
I'm like, this is not enough room for this.
Fucking kills it.
God, but obviously we'll let them do what we want.
Well, what they want.
Oh yeah, fucking.
It's just mad when he sleeps.
Sleep and dreams. Mad.
Obviously we need sleep and dreams.
I mean, reoccurring dreams.
Yeah, people think they have a meaning behind them when you have a recurring dream.
Well, let's see if you can figure out any kind of meaning to this reoccurring dream of mine then.
So it's not even an actual place.
But quite often I'll have the dream of going to this holiday destination.
It's, I don't know, let's just say it's going to be next but it's not.
It's going to be.
And you have to drive through a theme park, like an amusement park.
So you're driving through where people are just walking, going to the little games where you're going to fish the duck or whatever.
Drive through all that and then you run essentially a caravan size.
And then I drive along and go to this caravan lodge thing that I ended up, each time I ended up staying in for a couple of days.
It's not a real place. I don't know why that is a reoccurring dream.
It's quite often surprising.
So what I got from that is like the amusement park, zombie land.
You're in the car. That's why you're in the car, the zombies.
Maybe.
And then you're in the caravan park because obviously it's a safe place.
Because the zombies. Maybe that way.
Keep on the spooky thing.
Keeping the real topics going.
Also, sorry, Halloween in America looks so much, it looks good.
Well, have you not found that leading up to this Halloween it's been sort of more publicized?
Yeah, every year it's getting more publicized.
But what I'm saying is, it looks like you want to be a part of it.
That's where Me and You Above says we don't answer our doors.
Where in America people want them to knock the fucking door.
Yeah, yeah.
I think it doesn't help with here.
The price of the sweets and the chocolate bars and that sort of thing.
And they're normally pasted to kids as well.
Yeah, they're all dickheads and they need a slap.
But yeah, it is more of a family event over in America really.
The kids going out in proper triptatry in Brazil.
It is just like, if you ain't got no sweets, they're expecting a fucking hang or something.
So, nah, I ain't rich. You're lucky to get a little handful of Haribo, man.
But I think it's mainly because of the price.
I can't afford to spend 50 quid on a load of sweets.
But just handing out kids that I don't know, I've never seen before.
Well, the last Halloween, I can't remember the last Halloween I remember the one before.
Me and Kai, my partner, got loads of stuff in for it.
And I was smashing the Quindabenos, I loved them, couldn't get enough of it.
And then I felt bad because it's obviously teenage with a mask on.
And this little lad called me, all dressed up, all proper like my normal hours to do when you're a kid.
I had nothing left for him, I had to put on my box of fingers, like a whole box of fingers.
Chocolate fingers, yeah.
Yeah, a bunch of the clowns.
Did you ever do the tricky trick when you were a kid though?
Once or twice, but we don't need for the money.
I remember doing it once as a kid, back in Boise Green, my mum fucking walked with me.
I think I had a black bag over me and then just a bit of make up to be a vampire or a dragon or something.
The black bag was the game, not just a garbage kid or something.
Fucking yeah.
You went as a rubbish bin mate.
So I was like, how do I fucking glue the black bag back together and put it in the bin?
Sewing up the holes from my arms and heads.
Yeah, it's fucking, it is.
This country has been trying to copy a lot of Americans' traditions and that really.
Obviously the school things have been changing for a couple of years, it's getting more like the American high schools and that.
I mean again, the high school here now as well, don't they?
When did that change? It was always primary and secondary school for us.
And then sixth form, which was essentially 12 and 13 wasn't it?
Yeah, Infa Junior, senior as well.
But now it's high school and they're not even proper schools now are they?
They're all academies and colleges the class does as well.
They're not the one I'm fucking here to show, it's too hard for these kids really.
But they should be fucking big little bastards on TikTok all the time, maybe should that.
And when you were a kid, I can't remember, it seemed like ages before the next half term,
but it seemed like they were smashing an age rule a week the longer this half term.
Yeah, it's not these fucking international football breaks as well, I think it's every other week man, it's fucking ridiculous.
Because it's the half term now for Halloween and then I don't know if that'll be like until Christmas or...
Yeah, it's only off in six weeks, Christmas I think.
Yeah, yeah, it's fucking, it's not long isn't it?
Fucking nearly there. Fucking everything's coming off now though, ain't it?
I'm feeling like shit though, ain't it, with the dogs?
Yeah, I do try and look decent, store as more dog a little bit.
I've put the firework YouTube videos on just to try and ease him, but he's just a little pussy hole anyway,
you know, just to fucking, as I said the other week, another dog, little dog barking out the window as he draws past.
And he's like ready to run away, oh mate, chill out man.
Fucking, so yeah.
But I think he should be more used to the fire now, because there's a lot of Indian weddings and that around more than a year.
They're always banging off the bottom of the works, so you'd expect him to be a bit more chill, but he's not.
He's just scared of fucking, just random noises.
There's not much you can do about it, he's just fucking, deal with it.
Hope he doesn't fucking piss in the house.
Which he won't, he hasn't done to be better so.
Yeah, yeah.
Well, I suppose we'll lead off of the spooky Halloween stuff then.
The scary stuff mate.
And since we was just talking about dogs, you got a little dog fact now, ain't you?
Yeah, so Bobby was the world's oldest dog, his dog, the age, 31.
No, sorry, 31, sorry, sorry, I'm just saying, he says 31 there, then 31, he has some 31, sorry.
31 years old, so in dog years, seven times more, isn't it?
So, what, 210? Jesus.
I don't have no idea, but yeah, I mean, would that make you harder?
Because he's been in there for so long.
What I'm trying to say is, so if you've had a dog for 12 or 13 years, yeah, it's still, 12 or 13 years.
And you mourn the loss of the dog, but after 30 years, it's got to hurt.
I don't know if it would hurt as much though, because you're expecting it more.
Because it's like where your Inan and Grandad goes, because you already know that they're old, so you're expecting it.
So it's not as, even though it is sad and emotional, but it's not, you're prepared for it.
But it's like 30, yeah, that's fucking, he's got 210 in our years, that's fucking old.
But to put it in perspective, he was born the 11th of May, 1992.
92. 92 mate. So.
So he's got more missies then? Yeah, there you go.
So yeah, it was, it's alright.
Right about the time when I just mentioned the missies, she's not that old.
No, so obviously, I'm just looking at his early life.
He was born as one of four male puppies in an outbuilding where his caretaker's family stored wood.
His brothers were all buried alive.
Buried alive? Buried alive, it's called after birth due to Acosta's family.
That's the family I remember. Also because they couldn't keep all four puppies.
They couldn't, but I don't know, buried alive I suppose because you want to kill them, wave away.
You just give them away wouldn't you? Yeah, yeah, I mean.
Mad. Yeah. So, yeah, due to Acosta's family not wanting to take care of more animals,
since Bobby blended in with the wood of the shed he was born in, Acosta's father did not see him when he was collecting the puppies.
Oh shit, so when he saw three puppies, he was like, nah, I'm having this.
Because he blended, because he had that dark brown coat.
Fucking hell, lucky little bastard.
Yeah, so apparently, according to the Guinness World Records, Bobby was the oldest ferrified living dog,
as well as the oldest ferrified dog in history, being 30 years and 266 days.
See, that's what I'm, so, so, some say it's 31. Yeah, so it's just people around.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So he previous overtook a dog called Blueby, which was a female Australian cattle dog,
who was 29 years and four months when she was euphemized. So. So she was put down. Yeah, yeah.
I'm guessing, again, 29, so that's still 200 in our years. So she was put down because of old age then.
Yeah, so yeah, sorry, it's great. In honour of Bobby's 31st birthday,
100 guests were invited to celebrate the occasion, which was marked by eating meat and fish.
So it was 31, sorry, sorry, just on the wiki page, I'm looking at it, it's got a few.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. They're just cross contaminating the facts. Yeah.
So little little Bobby's went to Doggy Heaven, the little rainbow bridge, and I'm sure he'd be whiling for his family.
Yeah. So from one old to another old then.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I've heard a little story the other day on the radio. So the UK's oldest person.
And so she is 114, Eiffel, Caterham, Caterham.
Yeah, Eiffel, 114 years. You don't hear any Eiffels anymore, do you mate?
Well, no, it is an old person. Yeah, 114, fucking.
And there was an interview, obviously, with her.
And the person asked her what was her secret for living so long.
So she had two points to make, drink at least one pint of Guinness every day and don't marry until later in life.
So I'll do one of those things. Yeah.
Yeah, that's to be fair, I don't drink Guinness every day. I'd love to, fucking hell.
So when was she born and if she was? So born August 21st, 1909.
She lived through post-World Wars, obviously.
Madness anything? Yeah, so born the First World War.
So born the Second World War. Right, it's just a couple of years later. Ah shit, here we go again. Fucking hell, madness.
Yeah, because she would have been a kid for the first one, then an adult for the second one.
Yeah, yeah.
It's like you see people now, like 50, 60, now they're on death doors, struggling to walk. Yeah. And now, Ethel, yeah.
Again, it's like back in the day, people looked older than what they were. Yeah.
Like when you see those high school, like those old high school, yeah, 18 and then they've got what? Yeah.
You think that's why the dress don't present themselves? Yeah, part of the fashion back then, well, you know.
Yeah, just madness that was, fucking. Yeah, so yeah, 114, Ethel, going strong still. Let's see.
But she isn't the oldest person in the world. That record currently stands. So this is the currently oldest person.
Yeah, in the world. So Maria Braniats, she's a Spanish lady and she's 116.
So, yeah. I don't know if I'd want to get to that age, mate. It's like, is it a struggle to do anything at that age?
I think because we only know of people of that age at the moment. Yeah.
I think in another 20 years when, just because everyone in general is healthier, they're more fit, gym and fucking whatever.
Plus because of the retirement age, you know, by the time we get into our 60s, retirement age is probably going to be 90.
So you're going to have to fucking just keep going, ain't it?
What I always found as well is when retiring, that's what sort of kills you.
Because you start, unless you've got a proper hobby, something to properly do.
You know, even, I know a lot of people that have got the money, did the golf, don't they?
But for the likes of my granddad, as soon as he fucking retired, he was already a fucking alcoholic anyway.
And then he semi-retired. So, I don't know if it's still a thing, but there used to be providence loans.
So you could get a couple hundred quid off and put the, whoever.
And he used to just go around on a Friday and just collect a couple of quid of the weekly payments and just take it back to whoever.
Someone used to knock on the door.
Yeah, that's what my granddad used to do literally, you know, if it was a farmer a week or something.
He'd take that and go drop it off to whoever he was.
Yeah, my mum used to do that job.
Yeah, well, it was a fucking thing. That's why I'm not sure if it's still a thing or not.
Oh, it can't be, can it?
I suppose it took over one of the fucking payday loans and stuff.
Yeah, I just was...
But yeah, so I'd done that and then once he'd stopped giving that and that was eating, drinking all day, drinking and fucking everything on him then.
He didn't have a hobby. He had nothing to do.
That's why he was out collecting the money.
He was trying to keep your mind going down your inner side of mind.
So, yeah, I think by the time we get closer to them ages, it will be completely different again then.
I mean, I already can't wait to retire.
I just want to win the fucking lottery, fucking, you know, so not necessarily retire or just do whatever the fuck you want.
Yeah, yeah.
Literally. Yeah, fucking...
You know, 34 years ago, we would be classed as middle-aged men now.
It's maddening.
I feel it.
But when you think of 34, it's not a middle-aged...
I know when we were kids, middle-aged was 40.
But technically it's not though, is it?
Because when we were kids, it was sort of like in your 70s, that was seen as good in ins.
You know, you believed the good Lord.
But now you think it's more like in the 90s, it's sort of like...
I'm not being... I haven't fact-checked anything, but 90 seems like a common age to be fucking passing away now.
So we've still got another 10 years to be middle-aged.
But I don't know, man.
It's just the concept of getting older.
Years are going by quick as well, aren't they?
Well, again, you know, we say it every year.
Even this year is flowing by as well, isn't it?
I think as you get older, you just feel quicker and quicker.
There's nothing in general to look forward to.
Because when you're in school, I'll put it into fucking...
I'll clarify this. When you're in school, you're always looking forward to that hard turn, to that summer vacation and all that.
It just seemed to drag because you was always looking forward.
And I remember the stupid fucking porting.
I can't wait until I'm 18 and fucking this and that.
Yeah, so I don't have to go to school, sorry.
Yeah, and it's like...
You sort of wish your life away as a kid.
And then it's like once you fucking work and it's all, well, that's it.
Apart from bank holidays, which I don't really have one, being self-employed or...
Oh, yeah.
Well, Christmas, we'll have a bit of time off on Christmas and thinking...
So because it's just the same shit day in, day out, it's like nothing changes.
Not even the weekends, fucking obviously they go too quick.
That's why I would make a point if I had enough money, I'd just do three days a week.
So it would be more days off than actually working and it should be that way around.
Got to find the right balance, eh?
So...
I think my balance would be zero working day and seven chill days a week.
I think that's right for me. That sounds good.
Yeah, but where I'd want to be, it wouldn't really be hard work.
It's just, you know, if I'm in the lottery, I would just want to buy properties
and essentially project manage, do a bit of more and then send them on.
I wouldn't really get my hands dirty.
So we've spoken about this before, but I don't understand that because if you're...
It depends on how much you've got off course.
So you'd want the Euro million, which is enough, 25 million or whatever.
You would still want to do that then?
Yeah, it would just be more higher end properties.
I wouldn't do anything like that.
I'd give it a good go at spending it.
Yeah, it's just because I know that for people, I didn't do anything.
I would just hit the drink all day long.
You also do hear these stories when people with a lottery just blow it straight away.
Do you remember that one?
The big man.
The Scottish lad?
I don't know if he was Scottish.
He won 9 million.
Yeah, he bought a load of jewellery.
Yeah, he got a million quid for rights and now he just bought a player.
Yeah, he was all on from...
He was called a lotto loud one.
The Sunnys player used to call him lotto loud.
Probably, I don't know.
I know after three years, he was all gone and he was back on the beans again.
Oh, shit, was that Sunnys player called like all the way?
It's silly, isn't it?
Yeah.
Best part about it was Banspring.
Yeah.
Kids nowadays don't understand about page readers.
I know.
They love Nuts and Zoo Magazine.
Fucking.
They used to love buying them.
So is it easier now with the laptop?
Well, that's the most of it.
That's the most of it.
Yeah, it was a grind for us back in the day.
I know we said it before, but back on the old dial up internet and that.
And they said that he was fucking waiting for just a picture to load.
Pouring on the DVDs.
Fuck, you know, VHS format, VHS.
Fucking hell.
I jumped on VHS player the other day.
Isn't that true?
So, mom, she fucking.
Did you what?
She probably did.
I didn't have a scar later or anything to test before.
Yeah, she cleared out a load of stuff.
Some of the stuff was mine.
And in the bags was a VHS player and an old stereo.
And it was an old stereo as he had a CD player on the top and he had a tape player in the bottom bit as well.
Oh, separate.
No, so it was one duty.
It was only a small one.
Yeah, four inches, six inches tall.
But yeah, the CD player on the top.
Press it down and it springs off.
Put the CD in.
And then at the bottom, you have to press the stop slash eject button.
The little door to open and you just slide your cassette in and out.
It's like what I said to you before, you know, like when you miss.
Like if you used to go to a kid's net, how do you answer the phone?
Obviously me and you would do that.
Yeah, so it's the fist closed with the pinky out and the format.
Kid's net out, that or that.
Yeah.
So literally just hand out, fucking loud.
Mad.
Sorry, have you been watching Planet Earth and BBC Three?
Yeah, I've been watching the new one.
Oh, sorry, BBC One is new.
Planet Earth, sorry, I think it's called...
Planet Earth Three and you've been watching BBC One and BBC Two before.
I've not watched any of it yet, no.
Because it wouldn't be the same without David Attenborough.
I know, I've spoken about this before.
Honestly, it's like who's going to do that?
And like who's going to...
Me, it's the point where...
It's his voice, his tone, the way he delivers it.
It's just like...
Makes you feel like he's there.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Yeah, it does actually, it feels like your grandad did it to an extent.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I don't know, because obviously you've got Brian Cox who does the space buttons.
I think it's going to be... Yeah, that's a good shot.
But you wouldn't want Brian Cox because...
You don't have to... No, he's got a suit.
He could, but look, it's just getting past...
Hang on, he was just talking about the stars last week
and now he's talking about these fucking penguins over there.
Just acknowledgeable.
Yeah, but it would have to be someone like Lord Kim anyway.
That's a good shot, yeah.
You wouldn't want Lord...
The Lord of Jeremy Clarke to...
Because he's fucking...
No, I don't know...
He's trying to tell you about the polar bears and fucking shit.
Maybe Joe Rogan, he's got a nice stormy telling voice.
Yeah, why don't you just let us know who you'd have as a David Attenborough's replacement.
It's going off to the cliff today.
Yeah, email us your suggestions.
Just started somewhere, let it up anyway.
Yeah, email us your suggestions at realtalkingpod at gmail.com
or you can always comment on the bottom of the YouTube video,
Real Talking Podcast or XTweet at Ash and JD.
Yeah.
Yeah, that would be quite an interesting one.
It's that interesting, it'd be sad when it happens, when he does pass.
In a war's head, there's not a great deal of people.
I only say because obviously we've been talking about time now, how fast it's got.
He spoke about when he first went to an island, I think it was called Roy Island,
where some breed of turtles go to breed, have to breed to live eggs.
And he said when I first came here in 1953 or whatever he was,
black and white and looks about 18.
Yeah, mental, isn't he?
Is he about an age? Is he 90? Is he about age?
Yeah, he's...
He's done well.
He's definitely done well, good innings.
But yeah, I think he's a lot older too, so he can't fucking...
Fair play to me.
Without knowledge.
Yeah.
Well done.
Let's move on from this war window, shall we?
I'm just moving in scarily.
So last week, obviously we had our little rants and whatever about the Misfits boxing events,
so we didn't really have any time to go over our emails.
And one in particular was from Kirsty.
So the first email says,
Hi guys, I did tell him...
So for anyone that doesn't know anyway,
Kirsty asked for some advice about her new boyfriend being a bit overwhelming, a bit clingy,
texting a bit too much, you know, all of a dubbing.
Strong.
Yeah, we gave some top notch, real talking advice.
I don't know what I thought it was, mate.
Yeah.
So yeah, after that, her response was,
she had told him to listen to the podcast before, but he's not into podcasts.
So I tell him he's a shit gay.
No, I get it, because before we started doing podcasts, I never listened to a single one.
You didn't know.
No, no, no, no.
Yeah, I've been into him for a couple of years now.
But I've changed a lot over the years.
I remember thinking, I'm always going to listen to Radio 1,
not with the new music.
New?
Yeah.
Now you're going to Radio 2, mate.
Nah, nah, to be fair, no.
Is he going to be Arches or something?
I don't know, mate.
Fucking...
I started listening to Radio X just because Chris Mores obviously went from Radio 1 and he made that.
Then I went more onto Talksport, and then it was pretty much from Talksport that I went on to fucking listen to podcasts and that thing.
I would listen to people chat shit on Talksport, which you know that happens all the time.
Do you know what I mean?
Fucking Django R.F. fucking R.F.
This is endless.
So yeah, it was just a natural progression really.
But yeah, I barely listened to Radio these days.
I didn't even know Ed Sheeran had released a new album a couple of weeks ago.
One until fucking... I think I clicked on Spotify or something, because he was like, Ed Sheeran, I'll have you.
Listen to it once, okay.
Nothing to brag about.
But anyway, yeah, Kirsty.
Yeah, the prior email beforehand was about her boyfriend being clingy.
Look, Tinky, he's clingy the right way.
It was too much for her.
Yeah, she just wasn't in the same space as him.
So yeah, if Tony to listen to the podcast, he's not into them.
I'll keep you posted on what happens.
And I know from then, we have got an update.
That's what she says.
So here with the updates on what went down.
So went out for a meal and after a few drinks, I got the courage to have the chat.
The chat as well.
So she was about to lay on our fucking exposure to him.
I was open about how I loved him, but he was overwhelming me and all that.
He sat there silently for a couple of minutes and I thought he was going to cry.
Imagine if he did start crying.
Just sitting there like...
You don't love me.
I felt myself turning red from the embarrassment as I tried to think of an excuse to leave or something.
He then kind of huffed and said, I thought girls wanted all this attention.
What am I supposed to do then?
So he sat there, held himself back from crying and then started to get a little bit angry.
Fucking needs to give his head a wobble.
Told him to dial it in and we can still go out and see how things go.
They ended shortly after that.
He's been distant but we're still chatting.
So he might have just taken the conversation in.
And then he's gone too far the other side.
Well yeah, because obviously he's seen Rocky as being a big fucking arse.
But they're still talking.
So I think he's took the invoice and now he's like, I won't text everybody.
Oh fucking, sorry for the conversation.
So yeah, fucking...
So it's interesting because Izzy listened to her and was like, well she doesn't want me to.
So he's already just... when I see him was just like...
Well since they're still talking I imagine he was just like, alright I'm trying to take on board what you're saying then.
Hopefully for his sake.
Otherwise if he's going to have that attitude he's never going to fucking get anywhere in the RV really.
So yeah, just keep us posted.
It's interesting, it's going to be interesting to see how this ends up.
If he's already been out again as of by the time you listen to this or if you're going out again
just let us know, how was it?
Was he alright again?
Has he still been fucking...
Obviously he's not texting as much and been fucking clingy.
But yeah, Izzy fucking...
Izzy's switched on a bit now, Izzy.
Being a bit more manly as some might say.
We'll see.
Just let us know, let us know what the fucking sketch is.
How is he now?
Has he started listening to the podcast?
This is what we want to know.
Because if he has listened to the podcast that would make it awkward.
For him yes.
Well for her.
Because no, you told...
Yeah, well you know.
He took their advice.
Yeah, but you know, he could have always messaged us originally and asked for advice.
He could still ask for advice now.
He could cry, I'm sure.
He's had to turn it around.
Not that it's fucking ended or anything.
But, you know, give him some advice on how to be...
Just not a noise, essentially.
Don't fucking be a beg.
He won.
He's like, really like, obsessive stalkerish.
Yeah, more like the new Freddy Gruber.
Yeah, fucking...
Just let us know.
We want to know what happens from here on out.
And if he does start stalking, call the police.
So yeah, thanks for that Kirst.
Thank you.
And then we've got an email from Lauren Phillips.
I think she's emailed before.
Yeah, I think she has.
Yeah, hi Ash and JD.
Ooh, did you see about the man that drank 2000 pints in 200 days?
No.
I saw his story.
I saw it floating on Ladd Bible or whatever.
He drank what?
2000 pints in 200 days.
Points of lager?
Yeah, points of lager.
So go on, write that down to us.
So he's drunk.
Yeah, 200 days straight, essentially he's drank 10 pints a day, 200 days.
Because I remember seeing it, I think it was with Ladd Bible.
He was a day or two away anyway.
Is it Gonsai no Komasai?
Yeah, and then I heard a little bit on the radio that, I don't know what the geese's time was,
but yeah, he's on his last day of drinking 2000 pints.
Was there a reason why he started drinking 10 days for 200 days?
Or was he just the kind of person that just enjoyed it?
Well I doubt it was for a world record or anything.
I mean, imagine the tolerance after that though.
Well, I mean, just doing it for the first couple of days, you'd feel a bit shit, wouldn't you?
Us these days, I reckon at least 10 years ago or so, I reckon I could have given it a good fucking effort.
But otherwise, yeah, I don't think it was...
Let me just try and get some of the details.
He's got to hear that.
He doesn't.
Yeah.
Before he said that, first of all, he says it's 24 but he looks 24.
Yeah, he looks a bit weber.
But 2000 pints won't do that to you.
Yeah, it looks like it, mate.
So, I'm just trying to...
What was his name?
John May?
John May.
Spout the American wife, I'm not understanding.
You've got that wrong, I think.
So, yeah, 10 points a day, 200 days, sheer swords at a task, unrelenting, crashing hangovers.
I reckon after two, three weeks or something, surely your body would start to get used to it.
Yeah.
The hardest bit would have been those first few days when he's down the tent, woke up absolutely staining, done it again.
I mean, again, I wonder what time he started in the dialogue.
Would it be like as soon as he's woke up, he's had to have hair in the dark?
Yeah, he'd be throughout the day, or was it after work as much as he's had?
Yeah.
So...
He can't be after work as much as he's had.
He's only after spending almost 8,000 pounds, putting away 360,000 calories worth, fucking hell.
So, it was a self-imposed challenge, so it wasn't for a world record or anything, apparently.
He smashed 19 points on the last day, so he'd done an extra 9 points. What the fuck?
Jesus, he looks a bit bonhoc, doesn't he?
Yeah, so...
He had the last day smashed, no worries.
19, so 2,000 and 9 points in 200 days, fucking...
I mean, to be fair, how are you supposed to celebrate it? You're not going to go for a beer, are you?
No, no.
On the Madrid, it looks like, on that picture there as well.
Yeah, on the Madrid, on that one.
Oh, that's a heavy one as well.
And not a cheap one, eh? Or is he fucking up?
Nah, not premium, mate.
Yeah. So, yeah, I heard about him.
No, I didn't hear about that, but...
It'd be good to find out why he did it. Like, why he self-imposed on himself, or put himself onto this task.
So, there's a quote from him, I was drinking the same amount before, it was just a normal life,
and somehow I turned it into a job.
So, how the fuck can you turn it into a job? Don't tell me he's getting paid to do this. Jesus, man.
Wouldn't really call it an incredible achievement, I'm just a drunk on the internet, he said after reflecting on his efforts.
Yeah, he was.
I mean, it is alcohol, he's been fucking out.
Yeah, I mean, 19 points, mate.
Yeah.
We're the only ones who do test.
Yeah, but 10 points a day as well, that's his shoes, that is, I think.
I was doing football content at the time, made another video about football, and, you know, surely, what if you're doing football content?
And all the comments were asking for an update. In the end, I've just completely changed the content to me drinking points, essentially.
So, I'm guessing he's been doing videos and stuff.
Yeah, so he's probably done tons of top-line and all that.
How annoying are these NPCs and that, mate?
There's this one geezer, you should be able to report him because he's standing outside a shop in New York or whatever and he's just like,
Ugh, yeah, yeah.
I'd have to shout at some academy before I was walking past him.
And he has the pink hair, that one, what a fucking dip.
That's a proper weirdo, that.
You know what I don't like about TikTok, when they're begged for the gifts.
They should ban that, they should have a thing where you can send them gifts if you wanted to, but they can't ask or just mention gifts or...
Yeah.
Because, have you seen that Luke Benny?
Probably.
He used to do that, get out thing. Have you ever seen that?
I don't know.
Oh, mate, it already does now.
Again, I probably know if I'm fucking sorry.
Just a few of them are just begged for the gifts, though.
But people send them, so it's...
I know, but it's like that Jack Jones as well.
He was fucking doing it all, asking for fucking, well, I don't know, gold or whatever the fuck it is on there.
Or to be a moth.
Yeah, so people were paying him to fucking be a moth and then he'd fucking moan about them not doing the fucking job.
So, I'm not gonna just page you the ten, I'm gonna page you the entire thing.
Yeah, you're a dweeb anyway.
Yeah, so anyway, I saw him, Ashton said.
Now he's all know about the facts of it as well.
Fucking...
He was 25 going on 34, though, earlier in the pictures.
Yeah, yeah, he looked more like a rock as well.
Whatever.
He hasn't been the dentist since he was six years old as well.
Right, so yeah, Lawrence says, also, if you could try and set a record, what would you do?
Ooh, that is a good one, actually.
So, setting a record, I mean, you've got to try and think about what you can do with that.
Yeah.
I know when I was a kid, when I did play football all the time, I was good at the old keepy ups.
Ooh, that would be hard, wouldn't it, because there's loads of people that can do keepy ups.
Have you seen the ones that can do keepy ups and they're just walking down the string and doing fucking hours?
Yeah, you wouldn't be able to fucking try and do that now.
It would have been more achievable when we were younger.
I don't know, Graff, Danny, fucking...
I don't know.
I think I was going to start out promptly, I was going to do like a fucking fasting one,
because I've done 36 hours fasting and fucking, it's still all wrong.
I know that fucking people fast for fucking days and days, so that would be quite hard, actually.
I mean, I would love to break the record for having the best Pokemon card, actually.
You weren't rich enough to play that high.
It's like physically, like what could I do physically or something along those lines?
Well, that's a good one.
I think...
You should try to do 11 points a day, mate.
Easy.
You should try.
I think if we were going to try and achieve something, we'd have to do, I don't know,
what's the record for how many hours or something in a hot air blower?
We know what we should try to do is, you know, because we spoke about doing Ghost Hunt,
set the record, the longest Ghost Hunt non-stop, something achievable like that.
How many Ghosts caught on camera in one stream?
I bet there's no record on that.
We're going to miss that one.
I've seen one where they do 48 or 72 hours, we just smash, like stop over there and everything.
Yeah, so, trying to do it in a fucking haunted house.
Yeah, just achievable, isn't it?
And obviously, I think...
Better ask that, get some food in, fucking couple of meals in a week.
Is it?
Fucking...
I feel like it's here.
Yeah, well, that's probably going to be the fucking, one of the easier ones then.
Someone's at the door.
Yeah, I think fucking, yeah, there's not much that we'd be able to do, I don't know.
I mean, I would like to do a kind of physical one, that'd be really challenging.
Not that I'd be a gugging, but you have people like that, and I smash 50k runs every day, so...
Oh yeah, fuck that.
But it's having time for stuff like that anymore, with real people, real day lives.
It would be nice if we get big enough to do like, I've seen other streamers do it, where they do like 24 hours live.
It'd be great to maybe try to get the longest ever, some live podcast or whatever I've got.
That'd be a good one.
Yeah, I mean, I've, well, I know we haven't spoken about it, but I would like to do a live stream as a charity fundraiser.
Well, obviously, we need more of you people to like, share, subscribe and download at home.
Because obviously we'd need a bigger audience to get donations.
If it was just the people at the moment, we only got like 20 quid for six hours for a charity.
Don't get me wrong, 20 quid for a charity is still a fucking nice thing to do.
But we had a good following, getting loads of donations for cancer research or whatever.
So yeah, if we were going to do a world record live podcast or something, then yeah, finding it as a charity thing as well.
It's having a time and that.
We'd have to fucking see what records there are already.
Yeah, if it used to be YouTube, what does the answer part?
I mean, like, it just has to be, yeah.
Yeah, because if we're going to have a week off work to do a fucking ghost hunt or the...
No, sorry, go on, go on, go on.
No, as I said, we've got to have the week off work.
So the other thing that I used to think I'd love to do that is, is it called the cannonball run or the gunball run where you draw from New York?
Both assignment that.
Yeah, so I would love to get that record.
That's achievable.
You just need the right card with the right people.
So that'd be a great one to do as well because...
That could be a future special.
Yeah.
To get enough money to be honest.
You wouldn't want to rush that one though.
Because obviously, if it was just me and you, you'd be like...
Yeah, content of any mind.
Yeah.
No, no, thank you for that.
To be fair, I am going to try that one.
Because actually, the summing card would be achievable.
Yeah, try to push your limits and just put your own eyes on it.
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Thanks for that, Lauren.
Yeah, thank you.
Kevin coming and we've got an email from Carl.
Carl E. Boy.
All right, that's...
Got a question here.
If you was to be a gladiator in the Roman days, what would be your weapon of choice?
Fucking...
Oh, here we go.
I mean, you wouldn't want one of them Malle's things where it's the fucking ball on the giant...
Nah, you wouldn't want to shit on it.
Imagine if you hit yourself.
That's the thing, you more or less need to fucking go like that.
Or you twat someone and they'll be fucking deflected with a shield.
And then he bounces back and it's in your fucking head.
Maybe like a spear, but the Spartans had.
No luck though.
But are you throwing it or you...
No, no, I keep it just for distance.
I know you can obviously dodge and if you had a sword.
I don't want to say a sword because it just seems like the obvious.
Yeah, I'd probably go for a fucking axe.
Like a double-ended axe.
Or maybe a bow and arrow.
But again, you're limited.
You've got to make sure you keep that distance from the vaulting against them, eh?
Yeah, but if we start off, you're quick enough to rip each...
Yeah, but we're not fucking part of a green arrow though, are we?
The Horde coin.
Yeah, yeah, Horde coin for the barb or whatever the comics.
No, I'm gonna go spear.
That was the...
Spare? Yeah.
Big difference.
I don't think it's called an axe, but you know when it's got the axe head on both swords.
Yeah.
So it's always got the old bat symbol on a stick and you think that because you know...
It's heavy though, mate.
Yeah, but you've got the momentum because you're holding it at the bottom.
You fucking give a little spinny spin.
Fucking 360 no luck.
Fucking head gun.
Hopefully theirs, not yours.
How mad is that though?
Imagine that now, like watching people fight to the death.
Yeah.
What a crazy thought actually.
Yeah, it's just extreme USC and all that really, isn't it?
Fucking...
Yeah, what real consequences.
You've got to know, like, if one of yous get out you've got to fucking kill the other one.
Fucking madness.
But even if they survived, you know, I used to send like fucking tigers or something out as well.
Yeah, I'm thinking if the battle was dead they'd just let the lions in.
This is boring me.
Fucking open the gates.
I loved that as well.
Yeah.
Can you imagine the atmosphere in the fucking old Coliseums and that?
Yeah, I reckon it's like VAR and even when they get like a VAR, like, they shouldn't go their way.
You know, because it was really tense.
It was really quiet.
Yeah, they've got the thumbs up, thumbs down.
Like, fuck with his head.
And he's in gripes.
Yeah.
You think, look, we're all religious.
I loved watching people get each other.
Loved it.
Fucking Catholics.
Weird bunch.
I mean, oh, oh.
I was never fucking...
Ed Wessey was also.
He was never official.
Yeah, it's just mad because obviously you got that...
I know we've been fucking deep in it a little bit again now.
You got to be fucking of the extreme radicals of the Islam and fucking whatever else.
You know, the natural terrorists.
We did just take a dark turn.
Yeah.
I'm still thinking about the Spiers of Barbaros, mate.
It's just what I'm getting at is the fucking, like, the Catholics, the Roman Catholics,
enjoyed watching them people get each other and that.
And fucking, obviously, invaded country after country.
What would that say?
Fucking come over there and kill you.
And then, look, it's still a thing today, really, where, look, in the religion, it's like,
no, don't like you, so I'm going to fucking kill you.
Not just Catholics, fucking, you know, as I say.
Just the terrorists and that.
Just a really touchy thing, isn't it?
Because, you know, you're following something that was written years ago.
And in a sense, it's outdated.
But today, it's a sort of seeing how today's life is because...
And then you tell people this, but it's got a bit of open to it.
Yeah, I mean, I don't want to go down.
Yeah, we'll say that.
We're not ready for that.
Yeah.
We'll open all of the non-believers' minds one day with our religion, with real talk.
With real talk?
With real talk.
Yeah, thanks for that call.
Cheers, bud.
Yeah, fucking Roman gladiators.
Yeah.
Nice going with that, Peter.
Well, it was just normal back then, wasn't it?
Yeah, man.
Plus, you know, fucking, you was in there because you was a prisoner.
Or you was a fucking soldier.
Because they used to have it so...
So, if I remember correctly, the water system used to come in as well.
They used to flood a little bit.
I suppose they could flood.
Yeah, I'm sure...
It's his way to clean all the blood up, isn't it?
I might be wrong in that, though.
But I'm sure they uncovered something where...
Yeah.
Well, I don't know.
Yeah.
Probably had the same looking architects as the pyramids, didn't they?
Vagans.
That's it.
Yeah, no, fucking...
Nice one for that call, anyway.
And yeah, he's know what to do anyway.
We say it every week.
We don't log to seem log with Badger in Honobé, fucking...
You know, sharing and all that.
But we do appreciate it, you know, fucking it does help as well.
We get to see who's actually interacting with us with all your emails and that.
So, yeah, keep him coming, fucking.
Mortem area.
I'm gonna say it makes our job easier.
Not that it is a job.
No, it is literally, we come here, we speak about what we want to speak about,
then we just wing it.
But it's noticed that, you know, we've said it before,
validation with people actually listening and enjoying and asking us questions.
So thank you for that.
And it gives you more of an insight of what goes on in our little brains.
What makes us tick.
I feel like, you know, when people on other podcasts ask questions,
they're like sometimes, you know,
What, each one again?
I don't know.
Yeah, I'm saying I don't believe some of them because it seems to fall into the format
that they're speaking about, does that make sense?
Yeah.
You know, I'm saying, I think it's produced to ask, you know, I'm sorry.
Because they've got the producer that looks at the emails and then they'll be like,
Oh, yeah, I can tie into this question from this blog email app.
So let's have this topic so we can come on to it.
I don't know, we'll find out when we get a producer.
We'll be able to do it.
Otherwise, it's just all fucking us.
Real.
Yeah, real waiting for that first guest.
Yeah.
Again, yeah, if he's around and you want to come on,
let us know.
Real Talking Pod at gmail.com.
On the YouTube, Real Talking Podcast and ex Twitter at action J.
So yeah, I think I'm not know.
We'll end it there and we'll see you next week.
Peace.