Hello everyone and welcome back to the Real Talking Podcast with me JD and Ash.
So we're in the middle of a heatwave at the moment which for you it's terrible because you work out solid all the time.
And for me it's bad enough just because I'm ginger.
Now I know it's everyone always, outside of the UK the comments are it's only about 30 degrees, it's not that bad.
But people don't realise that our climate is different, it just stays hot.
And even when you get in the house it's still hot so there's just no escape in the heat.
We don't have aircon, it's not like America or Australia and our houses are designed to keep the heat.
We're just stuffed all year round really.
I suppose for a few people their finger bagging are actually aircon to the house which is unusual.
It's getting more popular to be honest because unless you've been in houses where it works for people that have got a lot of money and they've had it installed.
Unless you've got the money to do it, again because it's not a popular service over here it just means it costs more money to have it installed.
But the more people that do it it will bring the cost down.
Otherwise I've got one of those free standing air conditioning units where you have to put the water in the tank and put some oil in it and stuff.
It works but not a lot.
It doesn't cool our house down, it cools one section down.
And then when I've got my dog lying in front of it all the time just blowing shat into his bollocks.
I don't want that blowing back to my basement as well.
Because especially when he just lets out a little poof and the smell is just getting mixed with cold air.
It's mixed emotions then because you're enjoying the cold breeze but you've got money to come up.
It's just been horrible.
At the moment as we're recording we've madly enough got a bit of rain.
It's wet outside, it's not raining much but it'll do.
You'll have the grass and that for some people.
He's just had to crack me up.
So to try and beat the heat for the dog I've been taking him out on two to three hour walks early in the morning.
So when we had that little bit of rain an hour or so for the two knots.
The day before we had the first little bit of rain it was one bit of lot wood in the area.
There was almost a two foot gap in between overgrown grass, either solid with all the weeds and the stinger and stuff.
Then the two knots we had the little patch of rain.
The morning after that there's a lot of bits of it, you can't even see the floor.
So I'm walking through with my shorts on trying to dodge all these stingers and whatever else there was.
The long grass and that.
Just because it's grown that much with a little bit of rain.
So I'm driving it tomorrow morning now, it's going to rain much longer.
The grass is just going to grow too much.
Also, I knew as a kid, stingers.
I've done it the other day.
So again, with him being a dude, he won't just do his business in a flat area or in short grass.
I know that I'll just say the main long grass where I'm walking at the moment.
But he's done it the other day, right into the stingers.
I would have left it, but there's people around so you have to be careful.
To be fair, I should have paid more attention because I've got the bag over my hands.
I've gone straight into the sting, it went through and stabbed me in my bum.
I got an itchy bum there.
I couldn't scratch it straight away because I was thinking if any poo had gone on to my old bum through this little bloody hole where the stingers had gone through, I was going to rub it into my skin and that.
What are those leaves?
Duck leaves, learning.
Did that actually work?
Did you reckon it was perceivable?
I don't think so.
I suppose it did to us as a kid.
Anything like that now would get a bit of an idea running.
I don't think it put the lid on.
I think that's the effect.
It probably was, yeah.
I'm sure there's some science to it.
It's more of that soothing feeling as well, because you're not physically scratching it.
You're rubbing the leaf onto it.
That's sort of itching it, but softly at the same time.
I don't know.
There's that many strange things out there.
It must have some truth, I reckon.
It's a weird one, having someone figure that out.
Yeah, that's awesome.
That leaf works.
Yeah.
They're just spreading it around.
I remember a time when I got stung one day and the troll grabbing grass and rubbing it.
The family's leaf and thought, I'll try that, and that somehow worked.
I remember what you don't see anymore.
You know when you have swings on a tray with a stick?
Old school, you know.
I remember when I was younger, I went down the park.
There was a kid doing it.
It used to go over like a riverbank.
Over the upper southern riverbank, stingers.
They'd try to swing and they'd try to jump off of the riverbank.
Done it right on a men's day.
It was like a 4 foot high.
His parlor rides had disappeared.
He was just red.
I remember running out of gas.
Must have been horrible because I remember, I don't know who'd done it now,
but just walking along the street.
You know where people have the hedges outside the houses.
It would have been one of those.
I'd have pushed me into one.
I didn't completely fall into it.
I got into it and that was all stingers.
Well, no, more thorns rather than stingers.
That was bad enough.
Physically falling from holds into stingers.
That must have been horrible.
You don't see swings anymore, do you?
You really don't?
No.
You used to see one.
Any big tree.
Even where one of the places I walked through, there's nothing there.
That's a similar place really.
There's a little bit of a river running through in between this woodland area.
There's a spot in particular in my head.
That's Prawn.
There's a big tree there.
Palm swing location.
Yeah, there's probably about six foot of a gap.
There's not much grass or anything around it.
That would be fine for it.
It just goes back to what we were saying before.
Our kids don't really go out and do much north work when we were kids.
It's different.
I know, it's different.
There's a lot more stuff going on.
That's going back onto the previous podcast.
But yeah, back to the heat wave.
As I say, ginger, I have to put the factor 50 on all the time.
Because my turn-on is literally just old freckles joining together
and potentially getting a little bit darker.
I do still get the driving arm with the one-sided sun tack.
With the heat wave, Tuesday was a bit of a strange day for me.
I think it got to about 27, 28 on Tuesday.
But still, the job that I was doing, I was doing a load of flooring.
All the furniture outside, all our tools are outside.
So I'm in and out throughout the day.
Once we got set up, the first thing was to put the sun cream on.
So I take my ring off, take my glasses off,
lab myself, got my shorts on as well, so I'm rubbing it into the legs.
Started working.
Then after about an hour, I was like, oh crap, my ring's sitting in my pocket.
So I put it back on.
It doesn't matter how often I've done that and then I just hear it fall out of my pocket.
Luckily, I've heard it fall out of the pocket when it has happened.
So I carried on working.
And then I'll give myself another coat just before going back home again.
Because sitting in the traffic, every night, I'm over an hour's drive back.
I don't want to be sitting in the van while I'm just getting sweaty with the sun.
So same routine again.
Ring off, glasses off, lab myself, glasses on, ring on, head back home.
And then this is where it gets strange now.
So have you seen any of these videos of it's kind of like an alternate reality,
kind of, I've seen links for the Mandela Effect with wormholes and this and that.
All kind of lead to the same sort of topic.
So one in particular is a lady, she's opened up a fridge and she's got two containers of milk.
Both got the same dates, same little serial number and everything.
Obviously all the same label.
And she's saying, I've been to the shop, I've got this milk, I've only bought one.
So what she's saying is in the mirror of us, or alternate reality or whatever,
the same, her cell in this other reality has opened her fridge and her milk that she's bought has disappeared.
So it's duplicated inside this fridge.
Another example, so it happened to me when I was a kid actually.
You know when you're just bored and you've got a tennis ball or whatever thrown up the wall.
So I've been doing that for a while and then it landed behind me.
So I've gone behind the sofa, looking for it, not there, lifted the sofa up, not there, completely disappeared.
I had the whole of the living room looking for it, nowhere to be found.
The tennis ball that I'd been playing with for about an hour had disappeared.
So with that same theory that I've been seeing with these videos is that that tennis ball ended up in the mirror of us,
whatever alternate reality.
So there was another version of me, a little kid, that's finally got two tennis balls now.
So this happened to me again on Tuesday.
So I've got back in, I've had a shower, I've sat down and then as I've told Jack,
with this new routine of putting the rosemary oil and that in my hair, when I do that,
I take the ring off, which I did with the other dad, ring off, put it down, glasses off as well so I don't get the oil on my glasses,
put it through the hair, put it through the beard and then with the excess oil on my hands,
I tend to rub it on my arms, rub it on my legs depending on how much is on there.
So then once my hands are dry, I've gone to the side of the sofa where I've put my ring down, ring's gone,
so I'm looking around, I thought ah, it's fell down the side, hand down the side of the sofa,
fall down the back everywhere, not there, I thought maybe it's fallen through the sofa, my big bits have been falling out.
So I thought maybe it's fallen through, so sofas are part, big old shapes, I pull it apart into two sections,
sofa's up on its side, nothing, I'm checking all through this sofa, I even cut a hole in the bottom of the fabric
on the other half of the sofa which I wasn't even sitting on, let alone it couldn't have rolled over there
and I've got the foam, I'm looking inside, no ring. So I've ended up, in my head it's gone,
gone through one of these holes in this mirror of ours again, it's just disappeared.
So I've had to go through all my emails, found the website where we've got these rings from,
they don't even sell the rings anymore, other than that, no, because I've got the invoice off,
I've got the name, I've typed it in and that, I even had to reset the password, because obviously
it's been nearly two years since I bought the ring.
Because your wedding rings are different, obviously they're not gold, they're just a unique style isn't it?
Yeah, so it's wooden bands with titanium, they do similar ones but not the same ones,
because of the time of the dowel, I'm not going to ring them up now because it would have been closed.
So I had the reference number, account details, whatever, ready to ring them up the next day.
That was it as well, so, because I've put clothes on the washing machine, ready for wash,
or maybe to part with those, or maybe as I've stood up and I've, because before I've done the boil treatment,
the wash clothes I bought downstairs from the bathroom, I'd have put them on the sofa,
so I thought, someday maybe I'd throw them into that basket, because I was searching through them,
saying t-shirt, socks, everything inside out, wasn't a part of it.
So, that was it, in my head I resigned, the rings just disappeared,
it fell through a pole or a wormhole or something, and it died.
So, as I've gone up to bed then, my work shorts, I thought, I'll put them in the wash as well,
and I'll wear my old shorts tomorrow.
So, I've gone to empty the pockets, I've taken my stallion oil bag, a bit of change, wallet,
and then in my back pocket was my wedding ring.
So, even though, in the morning, as I say, I've taken it up, put it in my back pocket,
put my sun cream on, and then I put it back on, and then before leaving,
saying again, hockey, green, back on.
And then I've had my shower, because I never take it off while I shower as well,
because it just cleans me, as I'm cleaning as well.
Then I know for a fact, because it's a part of the routine, I've taken it up,
put it on the side, well, the part of the sofa next to it, but put the oil in the hair,
and then it's just disappeared from there.
So, all sort of reality, mirror verse, whatever, version of me, has lost his ring,
or done it in a reverse order, he hadn't put it back on from one of the times of putting the sun cream on.
And how sure are you that you didn't leave in the back pocket during the last time, obviously?
Because I remembered that I'd left it in my pocket earlier in the morning,
I put it straight on, while my hands were still oily from the sun cream,
but it's a spray, I put it straight back on.
And also you had a shower, didn't you?
Yeah, and that's the thing, because I took my glasses off first,
I remember putting it in between the glasses basically.
Don't you think that happens?
Sometimes you put stuff in, I swear I put it here, it eats someone, it's like, how did it get there?
Well, a lot of the time it's the white moving, but it is, it just, I was just so confused,
because I was literally, I mean, the positive side of it, underneath the sofa, we're going to vacuum it,
which I do do every couple of weeks, but I hadn't done it for a couple of weeks.
But it was just the fact that it was in my work shorts, which were upstairs,
and it wasn't with the wash pile that I'd already brought down,
because my intention was I was going to wear the same ones the next day,
but it was just in that moment, I thought, no, I'll put my old ones on tomorrow then instead,
so I'll put these with the wash pile.
And then, yeah, it was in the back pocket,
and if it had been in the back pocket for as long as it apparently would have been,
it would have fallen out of the pocket while I was in the van,
so it should have been in the van in that sense,
because the amount of times I'll put stuff in the back pocket and it will fall out,
because it's just an open pocket, there's nothing stuck in anything,
which it always does, it will fall, whatever's in there, it's in the seat.
So, having it fall out in the van, if I had left it in there,
and it's more so the fact that I know what I'm talking about.
Because you had the shower in it.
Yeah, I took it up after the shower.
I suppose that's the, you're not going to have a shower,
like, putting you in the wash.
No, exactly, it just blew my mind.
And all these videos that I've been seeing as well were before they sat in to me again.
So it's just strange.
So all I'm going to think is really that, yeah, alternate Jamie has had this ring,
forgot he, he's put it in his pocket, forgot to put it back on,
and then as he's done his air routing, his ring, well,
all the rings he's picked apart, so that, and then I'll have his ring that's gone into more work,
that's what I reckon, these mirror-versed things going on.
And that's probably the same Jamie that's got the two tennis balls.
But yeah, it just freaked me out.
I just don't get how it's possible, because I know that I'm talking about it.
So this mirror-verse, is it proven in terms of science or just theories?
Yeah, it's all, yeah, because a lot of links we blocked, the Mandela effect.
Because the scary movie one's the first and that comes to mind.
Yeah.
But he doesn't say that, does he?
No.
Again, I'm at one of the Saudi of the day, which I didn't actually remember.
Well, there's all the, so basically Britney Spears hit me back one more time on the video
when she's in the red leather one suit, whatever it was.
She's got the headpiece on, so it's the microphone coming round to her mouth
and she's singing and performing in the video.
And all the toys have the headset with it.
Lisa McGuire, when she did whatever in her program, she had the headpiece on.
All the Halloween costumes have the headpiece.
Or when you watch the video now, she's just playing face.
And to me, that's how it was. I didn't remember this headpiece.
But as soon as you start seeing the toys and everything, you start, well, yeah, there was a headpiece.
What would all the toys, which was an official Britney Spears doc,
what would them and the cosplayers and everything have, the headpiece?
And not on the video.
Yeah. So, yeah, there's a lot of these Mandela effects that are out.
Again, one that I thought was strange were Looney Tunes.
So some people say it used to be T-U-N-E-S.
But I remember it as T-O-O-N-S because it's the back end of cartoons.
Oh, that's a good one.
Yeah. But when I saw it, I was like, I can't remember it the other way around.
Those two O's.
See, I know it was the two O's.
Oh, no, but was that the looney?
Oh, the nice one.
Yeah. Now you said it, I can't remember which one.
I don't know.
I'm also quite proud of that.
It was, yeah. Animaniacs as well.
Ah.
What was it? Freakazoid.
Freakazoid?
Yeah, it was just the...
Yeah, so Animaniacs, you had the...
It was the three little...
Yeah, and you had the mouse with the...
The pinky and the brown that was.
That was different.
Animaniacs.
They did cross over sometimes.
Yeah.
Freakazoid was like a...
I don't know if it was science experiment or something.
He had all kinds of electric powers and he was fast and stuff.
I don't know.
I can't remember that one.
Because he had long black hair that sort of looked like a wig.
Oh, he had a grey stripe in it or something.
Yeah, almost like a long coat.
Yeah, some of the cartoons back there.
Yeah, so...
Yeah, there's a mirror burst out there
and these Mandela effects and all that.
It's just going on.
It's not been shifted.
But going from there then, it made me start to think...
Because again, I'm scrolling through my phone.
I'm seeing all these anim videos and all that.
Yeah.
It made me think...
I know that we're going to have more sorting to know anyway
because, as I say, we've all got a camera in our pocket.
So it's easier to capture.
So maybe...
Have we seen more ETs and that coming around now?
Because we've developed something
or we've got to a higher state of technological advancement
that we're almost a threat to some of them now.
Or is there something that they need from us technology-wise?
Is that what they're coming around?
It's true because it seems to be more open.
I don't know if it's that.
Everyone just seems to be more open now.
Because obviously we touched on it last week.
Last week, yeah.
Last week's one where it seems more active.
But is that just because it's more open?
I feel like in the 40s and 50s people would be afraid as well.
If not, people would be wanting to see something.
Well, yeah.
Yeah, I don't think there'd be many people scared.
You know what?
Talking about what you just said about the Mirabas, I think.
There's a place in...
I heard on a podcast, Colorado,
and they see all...
It's like in this valley or something,
and they build this viewing deck.
And they go up and they're like, on the land, the land's supposed to be sacred.
Just touching on what you just reminded me with the islands and everything,
that people leave gifts on this sacred land.
And the side that had visions of an alternative version of themselves.
So, yeah, I'm sorry.
I didn't know where the story would take.
I suppose I would have got the name of the location.
Yeah, no, it just comes to mind.
But again, is that potentially why we see ghosts and stuff as well?
Is it because they're actually from an alternate universe
or a mirabas or another dimension?
Apparently.
So, as we know, two-dimensional, being flats,
so not just a stickman on a piece of paper.
You're going more interstellar now.
Yeah, three-dimensional is what we know.
Interstellar.
I'm about to say stuff that I don't even know what I'm talking about.
But modern, intellectual grade.
So, again, we're 3D.
And then there's the fourth dimension, which I did say a video of,
how he's trying to explain it.
I couldn't understand it.
But according to that chapter, there's 13 dimensions.
I don't know how it could get any more.
Because that fourth, the fourth dimensions,
it's kind of like how he was trying to explain how valleys are hard to explain.
Yeah, another nine on top of that.
Another nine on top.
I was just saying, from that to the fourth to the fifth dimension,
that's going to be...
Then six, seven, it's like everyone's going to be like...
You just couldn't fathom it, I suppose.
No, no.
Fathom.
Yeah, no big work in there.
Yeah, I think with the aliens, it's...
Well, obviously we touched on it last week.
It's going to be weird to see where we go in the next couple of years with all of this.
Again, I've seen conspiracy theorists where they're saying that
we're never going to actually see an alien
because the COVID pandemic was sort of like a test run.
So when we had the lockdowns, that was their first initial test of seeing how they could control us.
And then with this alien one, it's going to be...
I spoke with the aliens.
They've said that I need to be in power and this is what we need to do.
So essentially, it will be one universal residence of the whole world
that's in touch with these aliens all the time.
And that's their way of controlling us.
Because we're going to move to digital currency in a few years' time,
there's going to be a lot of physical cash notes, coins or anything.
So that will be one stage of it.
We're trying to do those 15-minute cities in the UK as well.
So again, it will be controlling us.
We can only travel so far.
We have to stay in our district.
Was that confirmed?
Yeah, there's a lot of councils that have solidified on these 15-minute cities.
Birmingham was one of them.
It started off in Oxford as test zones.
It's something you can only leave your area, say, 10 times a year.
Any more than that, you need permits or a special pass.
It's all bollocks. I don't know how they're done.
Well, just be right.
It's against human rights.
There's already been a lot of protests regarding it all.
I don't know if it was episode one or two when I was trying to think of the Sylvester Stallone film.
He was demolition man.
I've got it on my notes anyway.
He was demolition man.
and Sandra Bullock.
So it's all one currency.
There was no crime.
And then they didn't even make it.
So when the Sylvester Stallone and Sandra Bullock actually get to know each other and end up having sex,
it was mind-blowing because for 50 years or something, there's been none of it.
So basically that film, I've been saying it for years, that's how they want it to be.
Where it's just rule control.
We're already a number in the system.
But they literally can just say, well, you're doing this and that's it.
A certain amount of credit, whatever the currency is going to be, and that's what we live on.
So that's leading on to what this one theorist was saying anyway, that we'll never actually see an alien.
I don't know how that will go.
I think everyone will be demanding proof that there's been actual aliens.
It's bad luck with all these people who know the moon landing and the flat earthers and all that as well.
I mean, again, even with Mars, Rover, I can't remember exactly.
I've got these people that say that that's just one of our deserts somewhere.
But it's not though.
No, I would...
Yeah, you could go down a road, rabbit hole with a lot of these stuff, can't you?
Yeah, I suppose there's always someone saying if you didn't know it did exist or it didn't exist or that didn't happen or it does happen.
It's whatever you want to believe now.
I just don't see war.
It's on the flat earth, reason.
I don't see war.
They'd have to lie. Why would the government, higher powers, the Illuminati's, whatever, what are they benefiting from?
From having a flat earth.
I don't know if you actually was.
Yeah, I just don't see why they'd have to lie about it.
It's just an absolute joke.
You see all these videos when they're trying to send off a homemade rocket and it hits the firmament wall that's around it.
It's a homemade rocket.
How do you expect it to literally go into space?
Plus, you don't know, because your watch on it will go so high and then it will spin out of control.
Well, you'd probably get bird, there could have been a plane that it hits.
There's a million reasons why that would go out of space.
All you're looking at is just your camera footage spinning around.
It just makes you laugh.
And with that, Musk launched the other month as well.
He was ready for his SpaceX.
Is that the rocket where he wanted to fly and land back onto the path?
Or is that an earlier one?
I think that was an earlier one.
So essentially, up so far, they were happy with all the results and they just exploded in the sky.
And again, all the flat earthers come out with that saying, oh, you can see, it hits the barrier.
That's why it's exploding.
No, it was on purpose.
Yeah, no.
Again, with all the money that Musk has got and because of that, Lord, we've had many satellites from launch with one rocket and this and that.
He's got all the contracts with NASA and that, so he's going to be earning billions and billions even more now.
Do you remember about four years ago, there was this, it's not a space race, but there was horror and I think it's for you to go into space.
Do you remember when I was a thing you could boys see?
It was Richard Branson.
Jeff Bezos.
I think Elon Musk was going to set up this space.
You go.
Yes, yes, yes.
It's still to me.
It's just a glorified airplane, isn't it?
I haven't seen anything since from it, but it was supposed to be.
As far as I know, they still do it.
It's just down to cost unless you're like a billionaire because it was something like five million per ticket or something.
The way he made it out of it was just like, so like the coach, we know everyone's upside, the volume of space you see.
But I remember that being like a big thing a few years ago.
Yeah, because even James May from Top Gear, he's been in an aircraft and he's gone into the atmosphere.
So he's physically above the Earth.
I only saw like a two minute clip of that.
Because again, it's just the stupid Earth as long as you can vaguely see that they're putting a curve on the image of the Earth.
And the way that they all say the globe picture, it's all CGI.
It's not an actual picture.
Yeah, because the satellites are constantly going around taking individual pictures of everything.
It just gets put together as one.
Unless someone actually sends a satellite or something far enough out to take a full picture, then you wouldn't be able to zoom in properly.
I've never got that flat Earth theory because it's like, what happens when you get to the end?
There's all sorts of different fucking theories on that as well.
So there's an ice wall that's all the way around.
So we've got the North and South Pole.
It's just like a giant ice ball.
Yeah, so the North Pole is actually the thing in the center of this flat Earth dome and then the South Pole is the hole of this wall.
Because apparently you're not allowed to explore it or anything.
But then there's all sorts of books.
I'll go down the rabbit holes of watching these videos and just laugh and all that.
So there's books of explorers from the 1600s and whatever that have found this ice wall and gone through what there's an opening that have gone through it.
And then there's other, not necessarily flat Earths next to it, but it's just as if we're one almost infinite landmass with water here and there and that.
And there's other continents around.
And you see these expanded maps and it just goes on and on and it makes you laugh.
There's even, there was one the other day, many years ago, when you're looking at the globe, the flight path from New York to New Zealand, whatever it was, the plain flight path is on a curve and it's not a straight line.
But when you've got it on the flat Earth map from A to B, it's a straight line. So obviously it's not the pilots flying in a curve, they're flying in a straight line.
But obviously when you've got the globe, so if you draw from A to B on a ball, it might look like a flat line.
But when you actually take it to the third dimension, it's a curve because it's not going in a straight line.
Even though you're going in a straight line, you're going straight around the curve.
So that's what that light line is. So they're doing the quickest routes across the curve, not in a straight line or through the equator.
Yeah, it's the most complex. Yeah, there's so many holes, not holes, holes, you could go idiots in these theories.
And they're going wrong. Some of them do make a bit of sense and you think, oh yeah, fair enough.
But again with the moon landing months, again that's a whole worth of videos and footage and it's out there.
Again, I think, no, not I think, it actually happened because if we had a camera or a telescope, a lot bigger than that,
we'd be able to see the flag and footprints and whatever that's up there.
There's also, I don't know if it's in Mexico, basically there's a science museum that you go to.
And there's, say it's a mirror that's put on the moon.
And in this science museum, you're there with a laser and you see the laser bounce back to you.
So you can physically see the laser on the moon from this mirror, whatever it is they've put on there.
And so how did they put that on the moon if someone didn't physically put it there?
They just put this mirror on just to shoot a laser back.
Yeah, basically. It might be like, I should have paid more attention to the video,
it might be a bit like the old spacecraft or something as they went there.
It might be something like that, but it's something physical.
It's something that you can physically see the laser bouncing back.
So it's not, well how's that there if you didn't land on the moon there?
No, it's been physically put there. So fair enough, with all the bullshit, lots of the original footage or whatever,
I don't know how you can lose it.
I reckon it went to the moon for the fake footage because we didn't have cameras or whatever, good Lord.
There's probably, through some laws, people have definitely been to the moon.
Because again, how do the people know about the space base, the alien space base on the dark side of the moon?
One theory always constricts and wonders there as well.
Yeah, I mean, I think we're going to have to dedicate a whole episode soon.
Space?
Well, space, yeah. And then random conspiracy theories.
Oh, you could find so many.
Yeah, it could be. It could be a few episodes special really.
Hi everyone, it's me, this is me Face.
Just want to remind you, we want you to send in any questions that you might have, any topics you want us to talk about.
Email us at realtalkingpod at gmail.com.
Tweet us, it's Ash and JD, that's the Twitter handle.
So literally anything that you might have, just tell us.
But literally, it doesn't matter to us. Send them in. See ya.
Right, so moving on from all of this nonsense now with the extraterrestrials and flat earths and that.
We've got another email from our mate Danny G.
What a guy.
Bad guy.
And, yeah, appreciate the email.
Danny G.
Is he going to moon him?
Yeah, because someone's after Danny G.
I imagine, well I don't know where he's from.
He's a bit of a British thing, the way we're doing it, Danny G.
So, yeah, maybe, hopefully he shares this with his friends.
And, Dan, what's up, calling you Danny?
Danny G.
Oh, Danny boy.
Anyway.
So he sent us the email, alright lads, thanks for the shout out.
You're welcome, lads.
So he's asked for an embarrassing story.
Okay.
So when I saw the email, it was racking through my brain, and I've got tons of embarrassing stories.
A lot of them we won't be able to put on a standard podcast, a normal YouTube video.
So I think we'll have to save them for a Patreon or something if we ever get around to setting one of those up.
But I'd say the most recent embarrassing story is from, right?
So, as everyone knows, Big Dog needs a lot of walking.
Probably about six weeks ago or so, I don't know how this was.
Walking the dog in the morning, as always, nothing new there.
It's a normal routine.
Once I've taken him out, I'll get back, go to the toilet, go to work, done.
But for some reason on this walk, I couldn't wait to get back to go to the toilet.
You know when that feeling starts coming over you, you're getting the hot sweats, you're getting the clenching going on.
So I've already got it in my head, right?
I'm going to have to take this side road and shorten the walk for the dog.
It's not fair on the dog, not his fault, but I'm going to dodge his stomach.
And I wouldn't mind, but I've not eaten anything funny on the note before.
I've just had a standard meal, I didn't have a burning curry or anything, it was just normal food.
What about coffee? Because coffee just goes straight through.
No, when I first get up, I'll just have a cup of tea.
So, yeah, there was nothing poetry-wise to make the service for.
So, picking up the pace, doing the little penguin walk, and the clenched his toes possibly be.
And I just couldn't hold it anymore.
I'm looking around, and fortunately it's at 4.30 in the morning, so there's no one around.
You did it.
There's no one around.
You did it.
I don't know.
It's not necessarily the main road, but the Buster's Goldies Road.
But again, because it was before where I could get to the park, so I couldn't even get to where the trees were or anything on the park or the bushes.
I've had to go in between the trees and look at a hedge-beam of some man's front garden.
And I'll just whip my cake.
Wait, wait, wait, no, wait.
So, let's get this picture.
So, in relation to this man's garden.
Right. So, again, it's not necessarily his front garden.
It's where it's the side of the house.
Yeah.
So, almost like a cul-de-sac.
It's all the houses.
Okay.
So, his is the end house, and then it's a patch of grass next to his house.
Yeah.
And there's some little trees and bushes and that there.
So, he might not necessarily maintain his patch of grass, but it's maintained, so I reckon he does, because it's a bit too neat for the council.
And I've just had to go in the middle of these trees, bushes, be it, and just lay it all out.
But while I'm doing so, because it's fell out, I'm not going to be around it.
What do you use for leverage or do you just squat?
I just squat it. I'd literally just pull the trousers down and just bent over, just squatting, and it's fell out.
But the dogs tried to fucking get his head behind me to see what's going on.
And as I try to push him away, it's the hand that's holding his leg.
This big plastic handle of the leg, I just plaited him on the head, and he's trying to run off, because he's just been hit.
So, I managed to not fall over as I've stopped him from running.
And I've just had to pull the trousers off and get out of there quickly.
He left!
I couldn't face turning around and attempting to pick it up, because obviously I've not been out of Volpe or anything.
So, I've just had to still just penguin walk as quick as I could back to the house.
I had to have a quick shower. I wasn't even attempting to try and just clean them all away.
Yeah, shower the sin away.
Yeah, because you were smelly.
Poor dog, trauma tolons, isn't it?
I wouldn't have, because you've seen him shit so many times, and you're just like, what the fuck are you doing?
Yeah, he probably thought, why am I not picking it up?
What are you doing?
To be fair, from the way he felt coming out of me, I probably wouldn't have been out picking it up.
Well, yeah, it was only a few weeks ago really.
Luckily, it's not close enough to my house that I know the neighbour, well, the person that owns the house.
I've not seen the person that lives there or anything, so I haven't had to try and avoid any odd contact or conversation.
They would have been more embarrassed if you'd got a call, because you wouldn't...
Yeah, I think I was fortunate, because the houses opposite, they're all sort of the same, where it's not solid houses.
There wasn't any front or back houses.
Again, there was another laid back bit of houses to the side as well, which were sort of like a semi-circle, facing each other.
So unless someone was awake and looking out at that one, I don't think I would have been seen.
If I was on another patch of road, most people have the ring doorbell and that, so I would have been caught on one of those definitely.
But I think I was just fortunate enough to get into the right spot.
So when I was a kid, we used to live in this Crescent and on the Crescent we used to have a patch of grass.
My friend used to walk from the main road and used to carry on.
You could turn the left into Crescent, but anyway, I remember this woman walking once when we used to play football on the grass.
We'd meet there, sat there, it wasn't a busy street anyway, but you've got about 10 kids playing football.
She's walking, next thing you know she falls down, she's wearing like this long maxi dress.
It wasn't a top, it was just a dress.
Lifted a skirt up, squats, and just the most runny shit of the tree, like it sprays up the tree.
And one of us was like, ahhh, running over to her like, ahhh.
And she literally just pulled a powerball.
But when you, you just kind of...
Yeah, yeah, I'm a litriarch. I was in full sweat, heat mode, just like panic and everything as well because I just couldn't hold it anymore.
I just had to get it out.
He was either in that corner or in my boxers, and I was in my work clothes so I wouldn't have been able to do it.
I would have had to completely change.
So obviously I changed the boxers after the shower.
There probably was some residue in those slippers.
They literally just went straight into the washing machine.
Yeah, so if you're out there and it was your patch of grass, I'll do apologize.
But sometimes you've got to do these things.
So that's more embarrassing stuff, right?
So yeah, mine involved something quite similar with the battle movement.
Me and my partner a few years back, we'd done a road trip through California.
So we started off at San Francisco.
I'm going to wait. San Diego.
And one of the stops was Santa Monica.
And obviously, so we've been there for a few days now and we've been enjoying all the American food.
It's got more shit in it. It's hard to taste the shit, but it's addictive.
Yeah, because it's the same as McDonald's food, isn't it, basically, where you can taste the additives in those burgers and stuff.
So it makes you want more definitely.
I can't explain it. They're called addictive.
We got addicted to the 7-Eleven slush.
But I think the Sour Patsy Kits was the one. I don't know if it still undo that flavour anyway.
I imagine it, because it's mainly just an American thing, it's not the Sour Patsy.
I think I've spoken about it before anyway.
It's big, fuck off, cheap, you know, fucking $3 or whatever it is for this big thing that lasts you all day anyway.
So we was having an event, enjoying them.
Yeah, I believe it was Santa Monica.
So we're walking along the pier, then we're walking along the main street.
It leads to a marina bit.
It looked like the idea of American Seaside Town.
And we were like, yeah, we'll go to this restaurant, and we'll have a hot dog, what's it outside?
And it comes in those plastic...
Yeah, the red plastic bags that were in all the holes, and then they put the greased paper in it, hot dog.
When you see the movies, it was literally, you couldn't get more American looking food.
And really, it was grand, really nice.
And before we went there, I was struggling to even go to the toilet.
You used to have that quite a lot.
Yeah, yeah.
It was really weird, up until the point, I got on the plane, I was really struggling.
As soon as I got off the plane, it was like...
I don't know, I don't know if that...
Yeah, pressure.
Yeah, or something, I don't know. I was fine.
We were about five days in there, maybe six when we were in Santa Monica, and I said,
we're having all these slush puppies.
Slush puppies, sorry.
Salad baskets.
Yeah, slush puppies.
I don't know if they're called slush puppies.
I think slush puppies are a brand, isn't it?
Yeah.
So they're called the machines.
Yeah.
So we call them slush puppies.
I think slurpees.
Slurpees, yeah, slurpees, that's the one.
I suppose that's just because of the noise that you make while you drink in a minute.
Yeah, goddammit.
Anyway, yeah, honestly, they're really nice and they're really addictive.
Watch how you're doing your hands, because anyone who's watching YouTube...
They'll be coming for you.
Back to your glory days there, kid.
Yeah.
Just for the audio listeners, it looked like he was giving a blowjob.
But me and my partner at Spooly, we would sometimes sit there and we'd go, why don't
I sell that?
Because just to fly there, drink one and fly back, it would be worth it.
So anyway, before we flew out, I was having this trouble, I couldn't go.
But when we got there, everything was working and all that.
So I had this hot dog, I had all this food, and I needed to go to the bar.
So I was like, to the bar?
Mmm.
Bar, then?
I didn't just bar, obviously.
I shit myself as well.
So you sharted.
Yeah.
And so you know what you do then, you brace up.
Yeah.
So we were just walking back, we were braced up.
I went to my partner, I shit myself.
And she's like, what, what, what?
And I get flustered now because I'm worried that it's visible.
You're in tent panic mode.
Yeah.
The missus is in panic mode, but really she's wanting to laugh.
Yeah, and she can see.
So I said to her, you're going to have to get the car.
And obviously the driver on the opposite side of the road, it's automatic.
She's like, I can't drive.
Then I'm getting flustered.
Get the fucking car, Luke.
Because I shouldn't be walking around.
So anyway, we had to walk back, which was about 20 minutes to the hotel.
And I had to get her to walk behind me just in case it was visible.
But what was you wearing in case it could have been visible?
It was short.
It was just black shorts.
So it wouldn't have shined for the material.
No, but it's just, it's just started coming down my leg, mate.
So yeah.
Honestly, I sat on the toilet for about two hours.
That's that gourmet living over there, all those slurps coming out your butt hole.
Yeah, I'd say that was pretty embarrassing.
So yeah, two peace stories.
And I was shit being chatted.
Well, it's always shit on these podcasts, isn't it?
I think that's why everyone comes for the shit talk.
If anyone else has any questions or anything, just please email in or slide into those DMs.
And Dan, if you've got an embarrassing food story that you want to share with us now,
that would be much appreciated.
Take some of the heat from us.
We've definitely got hotter in here while we've been telling them food stories.
But yeah, as Ash said, slow down the DMs, Twitter, Ash and JD, email us, realtalkingpodgmail.com.
Yeah, so I think after that embarrassment, we should call it a pod now, then.
I think I'll need to have a beer and just get over that embarrassment a bit now.
So we'll see yous next week, then.