You fart?
No!
Already?
What?
That's the taint between the holidays.
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year taint.
Yeah, it's like after Christmas and before New Year's.
Happy taint day?
It's the taint between the...
It's kind of like your happy Christmas is over, but you're sad and you're sad because
you're sad because you're sad because you're sad because you're sad because you're sad because
Christmas is over, but you're sad and you're excited New Year's is coming, but you want
it to wait.
I'm happy hanging out in the taint.
I'm enjoying this whole week.
I'm off this whole week and I'm spending time in the taint and enjoying it.
Nice.
I don't get that.
I wish I could.
I could.
It was a choice.
I could have taken the time off, but I was trying to be a good person.
Alright, well welcome back to Dudes Like Us podcast.
I am Paul.
I am Jeff.
And I am Sean.
We have a special guest.
We have a very, very special VIP in my book.
We picked him up on Oaklawn Street.
Yeah.
He was wearing a fanny pack with some rainbow colored socks.
He looks a little rough.
And suspenders.
Welcome to the show, Mr. Allen.
Okay, thank you.
Nice.
We're very excited to have you.
So, Allen's, he came in for the holidays to visit Fam and we're excited.
Every time Allen comes into town, it's always a party.
It's a party.
Kind of like Paul's mouth, it's always a party.
Wow.
It's gotta be, right?
This is the esteemed father of my wife.
Oh, I wasn't sure if we were able to share that.
Absolutely.
Why wouldn't we?
I'm very proud.
I'm very proud to be this gentleman's son-in-law.
He's never accepted me, but I'm very proud to be his son-in-law.
Well, I haven't liked you either, so.
Well, it kind of goes along with it.
You have to like someone before you can accept them.
I totally agree.
Thanks for pointing that out, Allen.
All right, so here we are nestled in between Christmas and New Year's.
Yeah.
Very nice.
Kind of a bland moment.
It's kind of like, oh, I'm not going to lay down the Christmas stuff yet.
It's kind of like there's a period in July where never there, or I don't know exactly
when it is, where there's no sports except like golf.
It's like a stretch of a few days, maybe it's the All-Star break, I don't know.
Football hasn't started up yet.
Hockey's done.
Basketball's done.
Baseball's on break.
Yeah, but we got inundated with sports like during the Christmas weekend.
I'm talking over the summer.
There's a time just like now is the taint of holidays, according to Sean.
I'm saying there's a taint of sports in the summertime.
I got you.
So.
Okay.
All right.
So we're all coming down off our Christmas high.
Were there any exciting moments that happened during the Christmas break?
For anybody?
Anybody go anywhere?
I think everybody stayed.
Everybody stayed home.
Everybody stayed in.
I tell you, I did my very first, and you guys participated in it.
Three of the four of us participated in it.
It was my first night Christmas Eve party.
Completely off the hook.
I had no idea this kind of stuff happened.
This was a work party?
What do you mean?
It was a party that we attended on Christmas Eve.
Right.
It was a neighbor.
And I remember you walking up there, Sean, this is a tier one.
This is a tier one.
Don't you fuck it up for me, Sean.
Oh, that party.
Well, how many other Christmas Eve parties have you gone to?
I don't remember much of this whole week.
I believe it.
Good Lord.
I was drunk.
You should have seen that.
We did.
We went to.
He was walking around like Captain Kangaroo with his frickin' big old cowboy boots on.
Well, here's what sucked.
Everybody was supposed to wear pajamas.
Yeah.
Well, we didn't get the memo.
And my son did not tell us, although he wore pajamas.
Yeah, he wore pajamas.
We kind of dressed up a little bit and Alan was even there, you know.
I dressed up in slacks and a nice sweater, red sweater.
Alan sleeps the dude.
Yeah, you looked good.
Yeah, we all looked good, but we were completely overdressed.
Inappropriately dressed.
I mean, this is where the host of the house has a T-shirt on and it says, D's nuts.
And I was like, all right, well, good to know.
If I ever get an invitation to come back to this Christmas Eve party.
Which is unlikely.
Well, now that you had showed up there and did all those things that you did.
What happened?
No, nothing.
It was a wild party and they're known for throwing wild parties.
So this is my son's.
This is basically some of my son's best friends.
His father threw the party.
His best friends.
Yeah, no, I should say that.
His best friend's house where they throw the party.
Danny.
And so one thing that was really, really interesting that I had never seen before is on the pool
table, they had cups, a whole bunch of cups.
Like all these little solo cups.
Yeah, solo cups that were covered.
And then you with a napkin and a rubber band.
When the time came, you had to reach through there and pull out a little shot bottle, right?
The little, the little.
And do it right.
Oh, it was actually Christmas paper.
Yeah, it was wrapping paper.
Yeah.
Christmas.
Well, the thin stuff.
I couldn't see that.
So you pull yours out and then that's.
Yeah.
So everybody pulls theirs out and then, you know, when the time.
It was like a Christmas gift.
Then everybody shoots it right there.
Oh my God.
And it was all kinds of stuff.
Did it get ever clear?
No.
So what was cool is there was some trading going on.
Yeah, a little buttering.
Yeah.
I got rid of Kam, Kam, Kambacha?
Kambootcha?
Kambootcha.
Kamchata?
Something chata.
I don't know.
Horchata.
And I had the peanut butter one.
I've never done that before ever.
How was it?
It wasn't bad.
It was pretty good actually.
I can't do shots.
And of course I was just after that.
Oh, no, you weren't.
Well, he had made a point to say, God, I'm kind of messed up.
And we played our pool game and it showed.
You know, terrible.
What?
Alan is always the one that is.
No, well, I'm always am the one that that's making us fail.
But this particular time.
Well, you scratched.
Well, I scratched on the eight ball.
My point is that we lean on Alan.
But I didn't shoot well.
You're right.
I did not shoot well.
He didn't make a single God bless him ball.
No, he didn't make a single one.
So it was just like it was odd because we always lean on Alan whenever we get in these billiard predicaments.
Of course.
Because he's an ace.
We can suck because he's a freaking shark, man.
And I'll tell you what.
You are.
You're a pool shark.
Nobody would know this.
Nobody.
You can go anywhere on the planet and take out Alan and be like, all right, we're going
to play for a thousand bucks.
The game is horse.
You're you're and he's going to fucking win.
You're describing something he is very familiar with.
As a matter of fact, that's my you did that quite a bit.
Well, yeah, you hustled at pool.
Did you hustle 500 times?
And that was in 60.
Yes, we're talking we're looking we're talking to Paul Newman here.
Now, well, you were a hustler.
And then you started running with Chad.
It was 66, 67.
And then you started running with Chad, too, because Chad's a great great.
But Chad is her his other son, my oldest son, oldest son.
Oh, that's OK.
My wife's good.
Cameron's very good pool player.
Yeah.
So we have a you have a family of good pool players and you would go out to bars and you
guys would play and piss people off and get into some dicey situations.
Right.
There's been a few.
Yeah.
So anyway, people don't like getting beaten.
And then when you get on a roll, you start to talk a little trash.
Oh, yeah.
Cool is the worst game I should ever play because I get too serious and too competitive.
And I become very excited.
You know, it's funny.
I become a real jerk.
What was funny is I was the guys who were playing it.
I mean, you did.
You started going in the zone and I just started laughing.
I was shaking my head laughing because you were going in the zone and I couldn't care
less.
Right.
Well, that's not true.
But they pulled me aside and they're like, what's going on?
I was like, he's competitive.
He's competitive.
Are you talking about Christmas Eve?
Yeah.
Christmas Eve.
So I I made sure that nobody misread you.
I just said he and he gets in the zone.
Thanks to Tara.
She started giving me bottles of water because I was feeling bad.
Yeah.
She brought me one bottle of water after the other.
That was after the shot.
And then I actually started getting better.
Oh, dude.
You and I played together and we did really well.
Well, yeah, I don't know how I got chipped out of the whole deal.
But because you suck.
So well, Alan gets back on there because we do in a rotation.
You know, you put your nickels on the table or the quarters and when it comes time for
you to write your quarters and it's your chance.
So Alan, he finally gets a chance to get back up there and he nails it.
I think he I don't know if they sunk a ball.
He went around the table.
It's like don't don't don't don't don't don't.
And he was like, suck it at the end.
Yeah, that's like I'm out.
I got to go.
It was funny.
It was a fun party, though, man.
Everybody was everybody was happy.
Everybody was in a good mood and drinking and you brought up the the whole drink a shot
thing because I think I think it's kind of an icebreaker and I think people need to do
more of that.
And I think having I'm not a huge fan of some of these sweet liquors that they put in there.
Like, yeah, some amaretto and some crap like that, but if you just do it and shut the hell
up, you'll have fun.
Well, some of that really sweet stuff you have to take a shot of.
I mean, you can't you can't just sip it like remember that praline whiskey.
Oh, yeah.
So super like it's very sweet.
Oh, very sweet.
Great taste.
Right. And then we shot them and we were like, wow, this is like a dessert.
Yeah. But if you drink slowly, I put one on diabetes, put one on a cube.
And I was like, after a couple sips, I was like, done.
Couldn't finish it.
Had to sweet.
Had to dump it.
I got to tell you what, I'm not sure you needed a shot.
If you looked at some of them girls that are in pajamas, I thought that was pretty hot,
actually.
Negliges.
No, they weren't.
They were just pajamas.
I heard some disappointment in Paul's voice.
Those are the other girls.
Those tight those pajamas were super tight.
It's ridiculous.
Yes.
Yeah, I get on the phone.
I tried not to look because I would get myself in trouble.
I take my phone out and I'm like, darling, Jeff, I'm like, Jeff, Jeff, Jeff, you're
never going to believe who's here.
And they're like, what the what?
What?
Who's here?
I was like, those girls that are working out in front of us when we're in the elliptical,
you know, the girls, they're all here.
They are all here.
The ones you drool over.
Yeah, we don't drool.
I want to say motivation.
They inspire us.
Yeah.
It's when they walk by or look your direction, you're like sucking in the gut.
You know, I don't do that.
I learned my lesson.
I can't suck it in that far.
If you start yelling out one thirty five, if you suck in your gut while you're on the
elliptical, you'll end up blocking out.
That's it.
You cannot do that.
So what did you do?
I know you had family stuff going on.
What did you do?
We.
Yeah, I had both boys home.
My oldest flew in from Texas Tech Christmas Day.
Or I'm sorry, Christmas Eve Day, and we had the traditional on the traditional or not,
but they are with my wife.
They weren't when I was growing up, but she had tamales.
I think a lot of people have tamales on Christmas Eve.
Christmas Eve.
I thought that was a New Year's Day thing.
I don't know.
I think it's a Texas thing.
I don't know.
I'd never heard of it when I was growing up, but I was.
And you make them or you just.
Well, we.
Terrence family does it.
Yeah, we've got them.
Yeah, they make them.
Yeah, we've got homemade ones before.
We've gone to restaurants and bought some.
These were from Costco.
They're actually not bad.
They're really good.
And we've tried them.
Yeah.
And so we had those and we had a nice family dinner and then we sat down and my oldest
wanted to do a Harry Potter marathon while he was here.
So we watched Harry Potter.
I'll see if painful.
Yeah, I'm sorry to hear that.
My wife loves Harry Potter and we watched it and I can't stand it.
I like Harry Potter, but a marathon.
I don't know.
Yeah.
And they're like 21 movies.
There's eight, actually.
And you watched Harry Potter.
We watched all of them.
You probably started one.
One of them.
Have you?
We started Christmas Eve and we watched the first one, whichever one it is, The Sorcerer's
Stone.
Terrible.
We made fun of it all the way through because the boys were old.
When they first saw it, they were young and they thought it was cool.
They didn't know bad acting from good.
Right.
Now they're watching it and they're just like, God, this is terrible acting.
Well, then they're going to see eight movies of terrible acting.
Right.
Well, it gets better as you go.
But when they were young, it was really bad.
So we did that.
The storyline is good.
It is.
Actually, I heard the books are amazing.
Yeah, I read the books.
The books are good.
It's a ripoff of Star Wars, though.
Oh, yeah.
Harry Potter and Star Wars.
Oh, yeah.
It is.
It's an absolute ripoff.
You're kidding, right?
It's the same thing.
Are you kidding?
Not exactly the same.
There's nothing like it.
It's sorcerers and...
Really?
Sorcerers and Jedi's?
Go on.
One has a lightsaber.
OK.
So let's talk about this.
I don't want to dive into this.
I see.
Well, I don't want to dive into this.
Well, we got Harry Potter, right?
And his sidekick, you know...
The redhead?
Yeah, the redhead.
No one knows his name.
What is his name?
That's right.
Yeah, no one knows his name.
And then Luke Skywalker.
You have Han Solo.
It's an article that says Harry Potter is a Star Wars.
Yeah, finally.
As always suspected, but now hard.
Solid proof has emerged that once for all the shows that J.K. Rowling, aka the great
play, Dristel, her entire concept for Harry Potter from George Lucas Star Wars, for shameless,
for shame, lady, for shame, bitch.
Let's see if you can scroll down a little bit.
I don't buy that.
See if we have some actually...
There we go.
Hold on.
I don't buy that at all.
So the similarities, but not a ripoff.
Those are ideas.
All right.
So basically what she's saying is she's comparing Luke Skywalker to Harry Potter.
She's, you know, you got the redhead, Han Solo, you got Princess Leia as the girl chick
on there.
You've got Obi-Wan Kenobi, and then you have...
Who's the big...
Waldorf?
The ogre guy?
Yeah.
Who's that guy?
That gigantic guy?
Yeah.
So there's a whole schematic.
This is so dumb.
What are you talking about?
This is a waste of time.
There's nothing...
Okay, I shouldn't say there isn't similarities.
First of all, did you see Harry Potter?
Yes, I've seen them.
Shut...
Don't say shut the...
The front door.
I don't...
Thank you.
I like that better.
Very offensive when you say the Yoda.
I don't say shut the fuck up.
That's rude.
You say it a lot to me.
I do not.
Oh, big fight.
We're going to have to turn off the podcast now.
So who's Yoda in Harry Potter?
Exactly.
Yoda would be like one of the old dudes up there that keeps the bird...
That's Dumbledore.
Well, Dumbledore.
Who's Obi-Wan then?
Obi-Wan is one of them.
There's several Dumbledores.
No, there's one.
Watching Harry Potter is boring.
Talking about it is even more boring.
Yeah, I've already jumped the shark on this, but I just want to throw that out there that
Star Wars and Harry Potter have tremendously a lot of similar traits.
Well, it's because there's good kid and bad guys.
To the point where I think she plagiarized.
I think that's crazy.
It's good guys and I don't think so.
I don't think so.
Anyway.
So what do you think the eight shows brought in on how many millions of dollars on those
seven movies?
Eight movies.
Man.
Billions.
She's the richest woman in England.
I wonder the comparison...
I think even richer than the royal family.
Between the Harry Potter movies and the Star Wars movies, which ones made more?
I mean, I think Star Wars made more as far as an industry because there's a lot of toys
involved and there's a lot of...
I don't know.
They've been around a long time, so they've got everything, a lot of products.
But as far as the movie and how much money it's generated, I would say that Harry Potter's
probably made more money.
In Star Wars?
Yeah, absolutely.
I would agree.
Man, I think part of it has to do with the fact that Star Wars started in 1976.
Well, if you adjust with foreign inflation, it may catch up.
Yeah, but that's not the reality.
Well, you also have to consider that a bunch of Star Wars movies are really not that good.
But you know, the bottom line is, if you're going to make eight movies, you're making
money on them, or you don't make this third one or fourth one or fifth one.
Well, that's true.
And you're right about the...
They don't make money on the later ones?
Is that what you're saying?
I'm just saying, you don't keep making movies unless you can make money with them.
Oh, of course.
Yeah.
So, as Star Wars jumped around so much, Star Wars started with what number in 76?
Number six or seven?
Yeah, it was number five.
Number five.
Okay, I don't remember that number.
You didn't know that.
It was Star Wars, and it was like the number one, then they had Empire Strikes Back, and
then...
What are you saying is number five?
Well, technically, it's...
Four, five, and six.
Episode four.
Well, Star Wars, I think, is episode five.
Four.
No, four.
Is it four?
New Hope.
New Hope is four.
I thought you were Star Wars...
He claims to be.
I doubt it.
He's a Star Wars sommelier?
He's a Star Trek guy.
He's a Trekkie.
I am a Trekkie.
I'm more of a Trekkie than Star Wars.
I always thought Star Wars was number five.
I like him more.
No, it's four.
So maybe Empire Strikes Back is number five.
I like him more.
So maybe Empire Strikes Back is number five.
It is.
All right, well, whatever.
Return of the Jedi is six.
All right, so they have so many...
And then they go back in time to one, two, and three, which were all awful, except for
actually the second one.
Man, see, I disagree.
I think that they all did their part telling stories.
For example, like Solo, the movie that came out, which was the story about Han Solo.
Solo's one thing, but Phantom Menace was terrible.
Phantom Menace was terrible.
With Jar Jar Binks and that stupid...
I liked it.
I'm sorry.
If they didn't have the pod race...
It was terrible.
It would have been the worst movie of all time.
The pod race was good.
No, I liked it.
I liked all of it.
Terrible acting.
Terrible.
Terrible writing.
They had the pillars that they were tied to and that prehistoric...
Okay.
Well, does it make it a good movie?
Yeah, they're talking about the scene where...
Where they were in the planet...
Yeah, what do you call the Roman...
The Colosseum.
Colosseum.
Yeah, the Roman Colosseum thing where they're tied up and they're about to be killed or
whatever.
That's in the second one, I believe.
Whatever.
You know, here's the thing.
Never mind.
I enjoyed every single Star Wars that came out.
Darth Maul was a good in the first one.
Every single Harry Potter.
He was good.
I don't want to dog any of them.
I think he had a lot of great lines, Darth Maul.
He did.
He did talk.
A lot of them were introduced at Christmas time.
We're talking about Christmas day right now.
Yeah, that's one thing that Brandon...
Because his birthday is middle of December.
Every year...
Oh my God.
That's a waste.
I'm broke.
What happened over here?
Now my bourbon, which we haven't discussed yet, was sitting on somewhere nice, kind of
precariously, and all of a sudden it toppled.
You just wasted it.
I caught it and it...
No, it was like maybe not even an ounce came out.
This is another reason why we don't do video.
That was not a graceful exchange.
Yeah, but I saved it.
Yeah, but it wasn't graceful.
But you lost half of it.
No, no, no.
Look, look, look.
It's still buried in the cube.
Anyway...
No, no.
I'm talking about you.
What were we talking about?
We were talking about Christmas.
This is a wheat...
Oh, we're talking about the bourbon now.
Yeah, let's talk about the bourbon.
Well, you know, we might as well jump here.
We moved on.
So this...
Our bourbon starting off today was a...
We sometimes get burnout going to Total Wine.
And so every now and then we need a little change up.
And the last one we went to was a great change up because...
Where did we go?
What was it called?
The Liquor King.
We went to Liquor King.
Well, the thing is there's different selection at different places because they have partnerships
with different distributors, I would imagine.
So in our area...
And they're customer based too.
Well, it's different buyers.
Right.
And so in our area, the big ones are Total Wine, Spex, Liquor King.
I don't know if it's a big one, but it's a great one.
It's a great find.
Yeah, Goody Goody's the other one.
Goody Goody, that's another one.
Yeah.
So anyways, they had different selections there.
And we noticed that we had tried the Penelope that had the four grain of the bourbons.
And we actually really enjoyed that.
And they had the William Dalton, they had two of them.
They had the Weed and Bourbon and then they had the four grain.
I think the four grain is called Lee Sinclair.
Yeah, it's got a different name.
It's the same distiller.
It's the French Lick distiller, right.
But each one has its own different name.
This is our third one of this place.
The Troopskate.
Well, it's good.
And this is good too.
So this is light.
It packs a punch.
It's got a what?
107?
It's 107 as far as the proof goes.
And it's a traditional weeded bourbon.
So for those folks out there that want to kind of shove this into a category as far
as what is a weeded bourbon, Maker's Mark is 71% corn.
This one is 76% corn.
75%?
So it's got the Mash Bill on the front label, which is very rare.
That is 78% corn.
78.
So it's got 18% wheat and 18% malt.
That math does not add up.
Well, it says the Mash Bill is 178%.
OK, there it does.
So it doesn't add up.
It does.
I'm kidding.
It should be 100.
If it isn't 100, somebody really fucked up.
It's 78 and 28.
And then another.
Maybe I just can't read.
That could be.
Anyway, so let's remind our listeners what's a regular bourbon versus a weeded bourbon?
What is replaced?
The rye.
The rye is typically replaced with wheat.
With wheat.
Yeah.
There are some people who don't favor rye.
Yeah.
Correct.
I like them both, but I prefer wheat simply because I, my taste buds perceive wheat to
be smoother.
Grassy.
It can be.
It's got a little taste.
If you get too much wheat in there, it can't.
It's like you're munching on.
Well, if you get too much.
You're going to feel munching on that.
If you get too much, you're going to feel munching on.
I had the Oregon spirits, which is a.
That's wheat whiskey.
Oh, good Lord.
That's not even a bourbon.
That was.
While you guys were complaining about it, I was like, I'm drinking life cereal and getting
drunk doing it.
That was a different one.
Yeah, that's pretty doughy.
I loved it.
All right.
So you've never been, have you ever been a, you're a rum drinker, right?
So you didn't partake in the tasting of the bourbon tonight, which is totally cool.
But were you ever a bourbon drinker?
Never.
Always rum or do you start?
Oh, no.
I've had a lot of crazy things.
Go back to Seagram seven.
That's a whiskey.
I drank whiskey.
I drank vodka.
I can't imagine that you haven't tried everything on the planet, given some of your upbringing.
Gin.
I drank gin the longest before I got on the rum.
I drank gin.
We haven't gotten to the gins yet.
You got to get it really like gin.
Allen has a very storied history when it comes to bars.
Well, I was raised behind one.
Literally.
Literally raised behind a bar.
The only place for my living room to the stock room where they kept all the beer and the
liquor and everything in was 10 feet.
Right.
So you went from there.
Well, no, actually with a living room, we opened one door and then there was the storage
room to go into the bar.
Right.
So your parents owned and ran.
It was actually my grandparents.
In a bar in Pueblo.
That's correct.
Thirty three years over the Colorado Colorado.
Yes, sir.
Pueblo.
Pueblo, Colorado.
Yeah.
Isn't that where the PSA has come from?
Yes, it is.
Yes.
What does that mean?
What?
What do you think?
Yes, Postal Service is talking about the PSA is I'd always say PSA from Pueblo, Colorado.
Yeah.
Well, it's the big, we have the big post office got the big place where the big distribution
center for everything that comes in there and goes distributing.
And sending it out on trucks and stuff.
Okay, cool.
Yeah.
But so the bar so you grew up literally your grandparents on the bar, your parents then
took it over.
My mother, my mother worked in New York.
You were working the bar.
I mean, how bartender how like what like five years old, 10 years old, nine, nine.
So at nine, that's that's old enough where you could start doing things.
Stocking playing pool.
No, you know, there you go.
That's where I started.
I started playing pool.
I used to have to stand on a chair.
That's not only insane.
It's unfair.
It's unfair for the rest of us who try to compete with you because why?
Because you want to stand on a chair too?
Well, well, maybe it might help my game.
I have to get that some thought.
But if you try to do that with a nine year old kid today, that call Social Services,
probably would.
Yeah, well, actually, because you were doing shots of something.
I think if you if it's a family business, you're able to get your kids to work it.
Of course.
Well, back then, they didn't even back then things were different.
These things were different.
They didn't even bat an eye at that.
It was an ABA that was going to turn your parents in.
I'll tell you what, there's nothing nastier than a beer.
Everybody smoked back then.
Oh, yeah.
I mean, everybody smoked, especially at a bar.
So you had to drink in one hand and cigarette in the other.
Oh, yeah.
And when you get beer in an ashtray with ashes with a cigarette floating in it.
There's nothing smells worse than that.
I just got to tell you, oh, it was nice to clean the bathrooms.
And that was just as bad as the bathroom.
Well, people throwing up every night and whatever they did.
I'll tell you what, people are nasty.
You'd be surprised what people do in a bathroom.
You'd be surprised in a bar and a bathroom.
Shit in it.
Oh, shit.
There's a lot of things they probably do to other other stuff, too.
The sink was in someplace where you just wash your hands.
Oh, that's where you clean the pipes.
No, gosh, terrible.
What do you mean clean the what?
What are you saying?
Drop your junk in it and just like your junk in it.
Get a froth going.
Good Lord.
Clean your pipe in a sink.
Whip up a batch of frothy plants.
The door and people like to do.
Oh, I'm taking a shit here.
Sorry.
Give me just just a second.
I'm staring at myself.
But I had to do that every morning before I went to school.
What?
Go to the bathroom and guys, think about clean the bar up.
Oh, please.
Oh, what were you doing when you were nine years old?
I don't know.
I lived in Germany before school.
I was sleeping.
No shit.
That's insane.
Well, again, that was in the that was in the late 50s, right?
Yeah.
When was that?
Our mid 50s at 10 years old.
I've been nineteen fifty nine.
Yeah.
So fifty eight.
That it's not acceptable, but it's kind of quasi is.
I mean, you can get away with it back then.
You know, so you went to your parents to the pathway or what was the process of you moving
in with your grandparents?
No, no.
My parents lived there, too.
OK.
So it was a whole family thing.
There was actually in this small place, which wasn't any bigger than this whole area right
here where you were all I had had my my grandma, grandpa, my mom, my mom and dad, two sisters,
a brother, an uncle and an aunt and me.
So that was eight of us counting your fingers.
I mean, that's pretty tight.
So where do you have like your gaming system and your Xbox and stuff like your media room?
They did have.
Where was your media room?
They had a rubber ball and some jacks, maybe some dominoes.
Actually, they had a they had a round circle stick might even had ran down the street.
But what we had was where you you hold hands and skip.
And the other thing was where you chalk where you did hopscotch hopscotch.
Oh, yeah.
I used to play hopscotch.
So what did you say?
Hold your hands and skip.
Is that a thing?
So if I were to be a Paul Jeff, come over here.
I want you guys to hold hands.
I want you to skip down the road.
See how far you get.
You don't have to sound like you're from New Jersey.
I did that to one of my golfing buddies.
Normally he was giving me a hard time.
I said, but you want to hold hands and skip?
And he goes, if you don't know how to skip, I'll do it.
I said, I can still skip.
That's the fastest way to break a hip right here.
So seriously, what so did you have time to play games as a kid?
I mean, were you always working the bar?
The only thing I did every day is I shot baskets all day.
You were a basketball psych.
Did you play for your school?
I played.
I did up through junior high when I got into high school.
I went to you guys call that today where you go where you have for people traveling and
they play the same sport.
What do you call that here?
A league?
Travel team.
Well, no, but it's like an elite team or whatever you want to call it.
Oh, select basket.
Yes, sir.
So I didn't play.
I didn't play for the high school after my soft soft freshman year freshman year.
I can't remember.
It's been a long time ago, but I played for the select team throughout for the rest of
my high school.
Was it like a city?
A city team?
Yeah.
So we played at the armory.
We played at the armory.
OK.
And you had some.
We played.
You had some very talented, large African American teammates on that team.
Did you not?
We had we played.
You guys were beast.
We played the at that time, Central High School, and we played this.
I'm not sure it was the starting lineup, but people on the varsity.
On a scrimmage game.
Of course, after we beat them, they said that they that they weren't really trying because
we weren't part of anything with that.
Right.
Of course.
Oh, so they weren't trying.
So they had their second string in.
Yeah, that's right.
That's what they claimed.
They got beat because they got beat.
Right.
And they beat them pretty good, actually.
Yeah, it was really different.
I mean, you do a lot of things differently than that kind of game and that kind of stuff.
Well, first off, they didn't have a three point line.
But I and you shot everything past a three point line and still average twenty seven
points a game.
Well, you have to when you're I mean, Alan, look, you're not six foot.
So five foot eight.
When you when you're playing basketball with taller folk, you got to launch it.
You have to play.
That's those are the guys that.
Well, back then, back in the 50s, did they have the seven footers?
Oh, yes.
I played against the seven footers in high school.
I've got a seven footer.
Seven footers are rare anyway.
But but but the point is these guys are all six, six, six, seven.
They're big boys.
Were they back then?
Six, nine.
So you got a you got a Weasley.
Well, Chamberlain was six, seven.
Well, Chamberlain was.
Right.
Bill Bradley.
And he was a freak of nature.
Right.
But who?
What about Oscar Robinson?
How tall was he?
Oh, he wasn't very tall.
I say six, two.
That's what I mean.
That was in the 60s.
Jerry West.
I'll tell you, was he way off?
What?
Four foot ten or eight.
I'd say the smallest guy on that Lakers team, which you're talking about when you talk about
them guys was Gail Goodrich.
And I think he was like six foot.
That's what I mean.
I mean, were the were the basketball teams they weren't like they are now, were they
average size is six, eight?
Correct.
No, no, no.
Right.
Players on average are definitely taller now.
It's just like football.
Taller and bigger.
Just like football.
Yes, it's like football where you see these these Super Bowl teams of the 70s, 60s, 80s.
Yes.
Where their offensive line, the average weight is 250.
The human body has evolved.
No question about it.
Yeah.
And the linebackers are bigger than the offensive line of those days.
Right.
So, you know, I my son played football.
He was an offensive line and he was I think when he was at college, he said he was he
was three ten, six, five, three, ten.
And Anthony Munoz, who is a Hall of Fame Hall of Fame tackle Cincinnati, yes, Cincinnati
nice was 280.
Well, maybe that's tiny now.
I mean, that's he wouldn't even make the line at the right point.
Right.
Like I said, the human body has evolved.
No question about it.
And well, the key is they've got that big and they're fast.
Yeah, they are.
His speed is ridiculous how fast.
So who is who there was a forget his name.
I think AIDS.
Magic Johnson.
God bless.
Which, by the way, Hudson apparently he doesn't have it anymore.
He was six foot nine.
That's impossible.
No, it isn't six foot nine.
Garter is not is not showing up on.
Well, he has HIV.
He has HIV.
No, they are saying he had he HIV is not detectable.
Yeah, that's my point.
And the reason why he doesn't have is because it's so low.
Well, yeah, because he has he constantly, constantly has transfusions.
So if he stopped that, it would come back.
I don't know.
Who knows?
Maybe it's filtered its way out of the body.
I don't know.
So if he has one part, what they used to do with Mastery Johnson, if you guys knew this,
but when he was playing, if he if somebody went by with a fingernail and you cut it,
he started bleeding at any given point.
Right.
They had they pull him out of the game and have to get them where he completely stopped
or covered up or else he couldn't play.
Yeah.
I remember that because that's what is this before it came out that he had it?
Because once he came out that he had it, it was a big deal.
It was.
He still played after that.
He did.
People were kind of like, are you gay?
Do you like taking up the poop?
Oh, he got it from a blood trade fusion.
These are these are country people that these are.
I don't know.
That's the mentality.
He was the first six foot nine guard guard.
I'm an amazing.
He's a he's he's good.
Right.
And you have to I say six, nine, pretty wealthy to to afford all those transfusions.
And you know, I'm sure during that same period, there were plenty of people who had HIV that
couldn't fight it like he did.
Got AIDS and died.
Oh, of course.
He's careful getting AIDS from transfusions.
Right.
Yeah.
Isn't that how he got it?
No.
How did he get it?
He got AIDS.
Was it from sex?
Yes.
He was cheating on his wife or whatever?
Well, I mean, dude.
Well, there are stories that he he slept with 13000 women.
Will Chamberlain slept with over 20,000 women.
These guys were sleeping with everybody in every city they went to.
I mean, right.
It's kind of like that song brand.
You're a good one.
You see, girl, you know, it's kind of like the that's about basketball players.
You do look serious.
Hey, look, I know.
I know based on one of the bars that worked out.
OK, Humperdick's in Los Clinas.
They're closed.
They went out of business.
They fucked ripped a building down.
They back in the early 90s, they would have it was kind of a hub.
They had a lot of the Dallas Cowboy players that would show up there.
And surprisingly, it was plus the Dallas Stars hockey link was a rink was right around there,
the practice area.
Right.
And after the game, they would have these these Dallas parties.
It wasn't the Dallas Stars.
It was the National Hockey League referees and umpires umpires.
And they would show up there.
And that's where this is this conversation.
It's not evolving around players.
It's evolving with the referees and umpires.
You know, this was specifically for the NHL.
It's just scandalous.
And you're hearing it now, man.
Look, first on dudes like a continue shot.
We call Chris Berman.
Oh, my God, these guys, these guys were horn dogs.
I mean, just they were horn dogs, man.
They would show up and they'd be like, I'm with the NHL.
I said, oh, so what about the does it really matter?
And they would always get the women and they don't care.
They're like, oh, so you're the NHL is and then they do.
They go home with them.
What to the hotel?
What a line, though.
You could go anywhere to any bar and say, why can't we do that?
What do you do?
Right.
I'll be like, I'm a I'm a major league umpire.
Well, it's no really no big deal, but I am amazing.
Yes.
Well, you could go in there.
You could buy like the big chess pad.
I'm going to wear it to the bar.
Where?
No, no, that's not I'm going to call my friend something here.
I think you can't click that pad and they call us to you.
They're like, where are you wearing that chess pad?
I'm glad you asked you fine little lady.
It's because I'm an MLB.
I just came from a game.
No, ma'am.
I'm not seven foot two.
I'm still wearing my February.
All right.
So the umpires and the referees slept with everybody.
It's a small microcosm of what is with the whole sports thing.
They have group breaks.
I don't think it's disgusting.
I tell about opportunity.
It's not unlike rock bands.
Go ahead.
What were you going to say?
Well, they have groupies.
I mean, you have women that follow around these teams or athletes or any different cities.
They know what hotel they're sleeping in.
The whole shot.
They all show up there.
You have the you have this.
There's just one groupie who got into getting a cast mold of penises of the rock stars.
So she has him in like a trophy case.
Yes.
So she has like Mick Jagger.
She like put her mouth like filled with plaster.
Yes, that's what it was.
She'd go in there with like foam.
Hold still.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
Don't move for a second.
Okay.
I'm going to put this thing in my mouth for a second.
So she'd get these plaster cast of all these rock star penis.
You said the same thing.
I just we worded it.
I know.
It's horrible.
That is horrible.
You had sound effects.
I did.
And a face that wasn't quite.
That's why we don't do video.
Yeah.
Wait a second.
That's exactly why.
So she convinced the people she slept with to she put plaster on their on their junk.
Yeah.
She was a groupie back in that they call bullshit on this story.
All right.
Mr. Producer, look this up.
Groupie that has cast plaster penises.
I'm calling bullshit on this.
What psycho?
I saw a documentary.
I think Jeff's right.
I've heard the story.
I saw a documentary.
She's old.
I mean, it's from like the 70s and 80s.
She's got like the Rolling Stones.
She's got like she's got Mick Jagger's mold.
She's got a lot.
So we have plaster.
Cynthia, the plaster caster from a Cynthia was is an American artist and self-described
recovering groupie who gained fame for creating plaster casts of famous persons erect penises.
That's unbelievable.
All Briden began her career in sixty eight by casting penises of rock musicians.
Yeah.
What you could go on Wikipedia rock musicians and prominent politicians.
I see Joe Biden now.
What?
You didn't read that?
It did not say Joe Biden.
Scroll down.
No, it didn't.
It didn't say it.
Scroll down.
My bad.
It didn't say that.
List of cast scroll down.
Oh, my Lord.
She's got all the females.
We'll pump the brakes.
She's got females.
Females don't have erect penises.
Maybe it's like I guess those two.
Yeah.
How do you have an erect penis if you're a woman?
Well, you don't.
I can imagine it's a it's a taco mold.
It's like a clitoris mold.
Yeah.
So she got Jimi Hendrix.
Huh?
No, weddings.
So are these in a museum somewhere?
I don't know.
I wouldn't want to see them.
You wouldn't know.
We'll go to the images and see if they have images of these things.
What if they have a male section in a female section?
Would you want to go see the female mold?
Would you want to go play with them and see if they fit?
The female mold?
So go back and look at the images.
I want to see what this thing looks like.
That's Epcot where you can play with the.
There's one right there.
Oh my God.
Ridiculous.
What the hell is that?
That one looks like a friggin elephant trunk.
It's like bent and 45 degrees.
If humans don't look very erect, no, if humans don't.
Well, that's what happens.
She was not very good at what she did apparently.
When you cover them in plaster.
It starts to go down after it's surrounded with plaster.
OK, this is a gross story and I am sorry you ever brought it up.
How do we know how we got into that?
Yeah, I don't know either.
Oh, John will talk.
Alan, you see how this happens?
The backstage queen.
So if we gave you a topic list tonight, which we didn't, do you think this would have been
on the topic list?
No.
Plastered pieces.
Plastered Cynthia plastic casters.
We got to move on.
All right.
So we.
Oh, goodness.
How do you move on from that?
What's our show?
We can move on.
What's our secret?
Cockerings.
All right.
So anyways, we're talking about the the bar experience and you've grown up in the bar.
And so, you know, when did you leave?
You joined the military at some point.
You were going to school and you joined the military as an option.
Oh, there's a lot in between that.
Well, yeah.
I mean, so you went to high school, but you're playing a lot of basketball.
So imagine you were on the road a lot, right?
Oh, just in the inner city.
Moving around.
Oh, so you weren't like out of state or anything.
It was this inner city select.
Yeah.
And so you played a lot of basketball and played with a lot of big guys and you can
hold your own and lots of confidence.
But you had shared some stories about plus what was it?
He was selling something out of a car.
Yeah.
I think it was school books.
Yeah.
Was he selling school books out of a car?
Educational material.
Like encyclopedias.
Or for underprivileged children.
That's such a great story.
Yeah, it was.
Is that right, Alan?
That's exactly right.
Are you sure?
Yeah, it was.
They were playboys.
There happened to be gin, too.
I don't know why there would be gin and bourbon and rum.
Hustlers.
And did you sell magazines or was it just alcohol?
No, it was all alcohol.
All liquor.
Out of a trunk.
Not even beer.
We didn't sell beer.
We sold.
Well, I mean, out of your trunk across the street from the high school.
Alan was.
It was like a food truck.
He was an entrepreneur.
Like a food truck.
Alan, walk us through that.
What led you to being the largest Midwest distributor?
Well, look, he grew up in a bar.
He's selling people stuff all the time.
So at some point, he's kind of like, well, hey, look, if I if I give this person something,
they're going to buy it and I'm going to get cash for it.
Oh, yeah.
Well, here's how it starts.
You have 16 year old kids.
All right.
I was 16.
15, 16 years old, 17.
Well, I was getting that when I was 17, but and you have all these Woodsy's every weekend.
We have these Woodsy's.
And so all the kids are all looking for liquor to take to the Woodsy.
What's a Woodsy?
Woodsy.
That's what they were cast of.
Yeah, that's what we called it back then.
That's where you go down to the river in the woods by the.
Oh, party in the woods.
The party in the woods.
Yeah.
And you called it a Woodsy.
They called it a Woodsy.
And I've never heard you.
It had a lake.
It had like a lake or river.
River.
Yeah.
I'd go to fire and drink some beer and whatever else.
So they're all looking for liquor.
Yes.
All looking for something to take down there and they would pay anything to get it because
they got a one shot.
So where did you get the liquor?
So did you steal that from the bar?
No.
So what we had what we had was so what we had was is that I had my best friend.
Well, this guy named Mike Webber.
His dad was a super alcoholic.
I mean, this man did work.
I mean, he he drank half gallons of I don't know what the hell it was.
Old crow.
And he I remember it cost like a dollar a half gallon or something.
It was nasty.
So and he didn't work.
He used to used to used to be a bar back or that kind of or do dishes and all that kind
of stuff and very, very poor side.
So anyway, so all we did with him was to say, listen, we'll buy your liquor for you if you
go buy liquor for us.
Right.
So he gets free.
So he gets a free half gallon.
So he go to the liquor store.
We give him orders.
I got I got where I got orders way before the weekend came.
Oh, you have what sold.
You're an entrepreneur.
You knew what you need to think about it.
I had a 1960 Cadillac.
If you ever seen a 1960 Cadillac, it's got a trunk the size of this table right here.
So for the listeners here, I mean, it was like five feet across and four feet deep.
I mean, that's an exaggeration.
But still, it was bodies in there.
And then we put put Styrofoam in there and built so you could lay the bottles in there
so they wouldn't break.
Nice.
There you go.
Just like that.
Is that is that is that is literally in the fins on it?
And was that convertible?
Mine was blue.
We call it the blue whale.
Well, there's a blue one right there.
Is that exactly the car, Alan?
That I think except for the tires.
Well, that's not quite I don't think.
Yeah, there's are you sure is 1960 Cadillac?
Yeah.
So but it was like four door.
I thought, OK, not to do.
No, no, it was two door.
That's the coupe Deville right there.
Yeah, that's not a coupe Deville.
It wasn't a coupe.
There were there's different models of Cadillac.
If I such a bad ass car.
I'm jealous that you grew up in that era because those cars are awesome.
Yeah.
All right.
And I saw you knew exactly how to to to to stack the merchandise so that it didn't get
damaged.
And what do you do?
There was an empty lot across from the I mean, where'd you go?
Now I was right on the corner, right?
Caddy corner from where the school property was.
Wow.
They could actually see me from the third floor over there.
I'm sure you're a ballsy mofo.
I have no idea why I never got caught.
I got to this day.
I think about how stupid were you?
You know, maybe not.
Maybe the fact that you're right out in the open was the best thing.
They're like, no one could be that ball hiding in a 1960 Cadillac.
I mean, that's ball hiding in plain sight, right?
Yeah.
Anyway, so we'd sell that ice carry rolls of money like this.
Plus, we had a liquor, our liquor, right?
Yeah.
But you take the first Jimmy the fish.
Hey, how you doing?
What's it like back then?
If I remember correctly, I bought Jim Beam and Sonny Brooke were the two big bourbons
you guys are talking about.
Sonny Brooke, Sonny Brooke, Sonny Brooke was the big one.
And so we could buy it for like five bucks.
And that was a cheap.
Those are cheap.
Like I sell it.
I sell it for ten dollars.
Sonny Brooke saw it.
Sell it for ten dollars on Thursdays and Fridays.
No, Wednesdays and Thursdays.
And then it went up to 50 to 20 bucks on the closer it got to the weekend when they had
to have it stuck it to them.
They had to have it.
I just charged them more money.
You knew they were desperate.
Yeah.
Very nice.
Well, plus I only had so much to sell.
You bank all that money or what you do?
Oh, no, is that it right there?
You partied?
Yeah, I couldn't even tell you.
That's like the the original Kentucky Deluxe.
The old Sonny Brooke is that a picture of it right there?
That's it.
So you you.
That's it.
So you didn't stockpile any of that money.
You just burned through it like a regular teenager.
Oh, yeah, we just spent money.
A lot of it.
What you buying?
A lot of it.
What you spending on?
What you do?
What you do with all that money?
You were a big spender then.
Who's whose Cadillac was it?
Mine.
You paid cash for it.
You bought it in cash, baby.
Bought it in cash.
Yeah, five hundred dollars.
Are you kidding me?
Brand new?
No, no, no, no, no.
OK, I was going to say.
No, I was 10 years old.
No, not even 10 years old.
Seven years old.
Oh, I see.
Right.
OK.
I think it was five hundred bucks.
How much was a brand new Cadillac in 1960?
Probably twenty five hundred bucks.
Yeah, really?
That's it.
Three grand maybe.
Are you kidding me?
You could get a GTO back then, a GTO with the big engine.
I forget the engine model number because I'm not a big car guy, but with that big it was
a eight cylinder.
Yeah, the three ninety, three fifty, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, that probably probably was.
And you could get that for like three grand.
Three.
Find out what the number.
How much so how much was a movie?
How much did you pay for in a movie?
Movie theater ticket ticket.
Was it shopping like a dime a quarter?
You know, I don't remember.
Yeah.
I mean, you took your girl to the movies.
No, you never took your girl to the movies.
No.
What the hell?
You had a girlfriend.
We took him to the river.
Oh, that's where it came from.
With the van down by the river.
Yes.
Talking about spending money.
Cadillac.
We used to have a lot of parties because we had all the liquor and stuff and everybody
come over and have parties and stuff like that.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, for sure.
That's where it started.
There you go.
Sonny, a Trans Am 1969.
One of the coolest cars.
Four thousand three hundred sixty six dollars back then.
Sunnybrook still exists at specs.
We're going to buy it.
Are you kidding me?
We're going to try it on the next podcast.
Eight dollars and sixty two cents.
But Jeff, I get to buy it this time.
Is it really eight bucks?
I get to buy this time because that's usually what you spend.
That twelve bucks.
I usually spend.
I did that once because I wanted to get that to force you to drink it.
Just to give you a little background.
So every Friday, right, we go.
I told you this.
We go.
We go to the to the alcohol store.
I met you there once.
Yes.
Yeah.
And we buy and we buy bourbons for the podcast.
And I'm looking at the 90, probably hundred hundred and ten dollars bourbon bullshit.
Right.
And then and then Jeff's Yank and stuff off the shelf at 1399.
That's Evan.
Evan Williams White label.
Nine ninety nine.
Sometimes he ventures into the twenty one ninety nine.
Twelve ninety nine for that.
Seriously, bro.
And I got that because that is your demon bourbon right there.
We're not talking about demon bourbon.
And I didn't drink any of that.
Actually, what you can do, you can take that shot of Sunnybrook.
OK.
And Walter's beer, because we had Walter Distillery in Pueblo at that time.
All right.
So we have a tonic here.
Seventy five cents, fifty cents for the shot and twenty five cents for the beer.
And the beer was like gigantic, like around four miles, like 16 ounce tanker.
Yeah.
Sixteen ounces, maybe something like that.
Yeah.
Seventy five cents.
Wow.
Yeah.
Today, that's twenty eight dollars.
Unless you're at the football game.
That is fifty dollars.
No, nineteen eighty eight.
I was working a bar in El Paso and beers were a dollar seventy five.
When I was going to college, eighty eight time frame, you get a picture for two to four bucks,
and you're like, oh, that's a lot of money.
Yeah, we had dollars.
How much you wanted to splurge?
We had dollars.
Seventy five pictures.
It's crazy how everything just went so fast, so high.
Yeah.
Now a picture is like twelve dollars.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's ridiculous.
It's small pictures.
Twenty dollars.
And nothing's different in how they make it and how they bottle it and how they.
Well, I mean, it's all about back then it was about getting people in the door, butts
in the door, getting popularity.
It's also where you're at.
It's kind of their campaign.
Yeah.
We're here in the Dallas area.
We're here at Stephen F. Austin and we're buying pictures of Jack and Coke for five
bucks a pitcher.
That's why I said, Sean.
Yes, I went to the bar.
There was like five dollars.
Anything pictures.
I was like, anything.
Where was I?
You're a tier one.
Yeah, you were tier one.
So you know what?
That is your I wasn't invited.
Don't give me this to the bar.
They went there.
I said anything.
She was like anything.
So I get a Jack Coke in a pitcher.
She was like, if you can find a pitcher, you can have a Jack Coke in that pitcher.
I do.
That's that's that's a whole like seven hundred and fifty milliliter bottle.
Yes.
Did you throw much?
No.
That'd been made.
No, she put like half a bottle in one.
They're losing money.
Well, I don't care.
I went over there and I scanned the bar and I saw an empty pitcher.
Two and I did it to two.
I was probably drunk before that.
What does that mean?
If you can find a pitcher.
They only have so many pitchers and everyone was everyone was drinking that night.
It was college town.
All the college kids were buying their pitchers of booze.
They call that binge drinking, right?
I mean, we had any coin drinks.
We would grab a handful of coins on the way out, literally just dip our hand into the coin jar.
And that was we got shit based on that.
Wow.
I think Sean threw some people on the ground getting those two empty pictures.
I you know, it was about being confident.
Those are mine.
You know, that's all it was.
Really?
I walked over there and they literally made it like 50 50.
They poured.
Did they fill it with ice?
Watch them do this.
Yes, they filled it with ice.
They they took a bottle and they you know, they how they spin the bottle so that it pours better.
Yes.
And they were like, well, it was a lot of it came out about half a bottle.
Oh my God.
And then she was like Coke to top it off.
And I was like, I had like tears.
Are you tearing up?
Are we guys hugging each other and stuff?
He had a picture in a non weird way, which I would.
He had a picture and I had a picture.
Back to the table.
So here you go.
Are they still doing this?
I guess.
Yeah.
OK.
When we going?
What the hell?
Yeah.
All right.
So on the bar, the base of Lakeview Bar.
Yes, it is.
Is that where you did in New Orleans?
All right.
So Alan has asked Mr.
Producer to pull up the bar that he grew up in.
Really?
All right.
So we're looking for Lakeview in Pueblo, Colorado.
Lakeview Bar, Pueblo, Colorado.
The address is 2330 Lake Avenue.
All right.
Look at that.
He knows the address and everything.
No pictures, I guess, though.
No pictures.
What do you want?
We went in there, Alan.
Apple Maps.
We went in there, remember?
Oh, of course.
You want to go to Google Maps.
Every time you go to Pueblo, you stop in there and reminisce.
I still got my Bacardi and Diet Coke in there for $4.
That's the reason why.
But they're Alaska.
So tell the story about the tragic story of what they did in that bar.
What was there that they removed?
Was it a gay bar?
The bar.
Yeah.
Talk about it.
Oh, they took out the bar, the old bar.
Check this.
Oh, wooden redwood.
Mahogany?
Yeah.
And they took out the beautiful bar and the photographs was all the hand paintings.
Yeah.
The back.
All across the top and the bar and the whole works and just got rid of it.
Mosaic stuff.
It was a big, big hardwood bar.
Oh, yeah.
All made out of redwood, cherry woods.
Producer, you were still on Duck Duck Go.
You got to go to Google.com.
No, Duck Duck Go is good.
Yeah, but Google is more efficient when it comes to some of these pictures.
Yeah, but Duck Duck Google like only shows you what they want to.
Oh, yeah.
Unfortunately, I used to think this was the reason I wanted to see a picture, show you guys a picture of it.
We thought this place was absolutely huge, right?
Tiny.
And then when you take eight people live in this thing where we work and then the bar was the biggest part of the whole building because everything was all in one.
And the bar is not big.
Yeah.
The bar is tiny.
So you've been there?
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
We've been there.
The bar is tiny.
Yeah.
I used to think that was the tough I used to have to wax it every Saturday morning because all hardwood floors, wooden floors was an electric box waxed every Saturday morning was an electric buffer.
There it is.
There's a picture right there.
So it's a bar Pueblo.
Little paps.
That's not it.
It's a square bar.
It's not a long skinny bar.
It's a square bar.
This pool table doesn't look right.
Open that up, please.
All right.
Hold on.
We're looking at pictures here.
We're trying to find this iconic bar in Pueblo Lake View Bar.
It's still there.
Oh, it is still there.
It's got so the it's got an all white out outer outer deal with blue letter.
It's a classic Colorado Pueblo kind of building.
Yeah.
So the building is it really?
Yes.
All right.
It's not Adobe.
They call that Stucco Stucco.
Yeah.
The newer stuff is about EFIS.
So switch to the satellite picture.
Let's take a look at this.
So anyway, so that's it's an older bar.
There's your view right there.
That's actually pretty big bar.
I mean, it does look like a big bar.
It fills the whole corner.
I should look at that car.
You see the car.
It's not that big.
You have anti-bebs.
And that and the part that goes to the right is where they lived.
The bar was right.
Oh, what a trip.
That is a trip, man.
So you live right there.
I told you it was right next.
I mean, there was only a door between there where they stored the beer and everything.
So did you ever did you drink as a kid?
Oh, yeah.
So I mean, I mean, your parents were I mean, they're sure they they didn't condone it.
But whereas there are certain allowance of drinking, they were, you know, were they in
there drinking too and having fun?
I mean, it's a business.
It's family business.
And unfortunately, when you own a bar, part of part of owning a bar is to build your clientele
and to build clientele.
You have relationships.
You want regular.
So you got to you got to have rapport with them.
And you know, and your mother was a genius at that.
Yes, she's very good.
She worked there the whole time, the whole thirty three years over there.
And the key there was is that and I have to tell you a quick story is that back then all
the bars had to close at eight o'clock on Sunday night.
So at eight o'clock on Sunday night, we used to go in there.
That's when I get to clean it up and I have to worry about getting up on Monday morning
at six o'clock in the morning before I went to school.
You had to do all that.
But it's where I learned how to dance.
My mother put on the jukebox and she taught me how to dance.
Every Sunday we dance to something different in there.
Oh, how cool is they own the jukebox or she play all the different music, right?
Like swing.
I always remember that.
Yes, swing music was really big then.
Oh, big.
Yeah.
Rap.
No rap.
The beginning of rap.
Cool.
J.
Cool.
Now, I think that was the sugar gang.
NWA.
What did you listen to back then?
Motown.
I grew up on all our music.
R&B music, which is what?
Temptation.
Except believe it or not, that bar was country.
It was a country bar.
Wow.
So who would be the biggest name back then?
Probably Johnny Cash.
Waylon Jennings.
Yeah.
The old school, there's a tear in my beer.
Hank Williams.
The original Hank Williams.
No, no, no, no, think way back.
Not the junior.
Hank Williams.
Hank Williams Senior is pretty way back.
Who's Roy the He-Hall guy?
Roy.
Roy Orbison?
No.
Roy Rogers.
No.
Well, he was on He-Hall.
The guy was a really good guitar player actually.
I think it was Roy something or other.
Yeah, I know who you're talking about.
You tell us, who were some of the big artists, country artists that played there?
I mean, you're not a big country fan, but you heard it in the bar.
Loretta Lynn.
Yeah.
Is that that kind of stuff?
Yeah, yeah.
I didn't pay much attention.
I never cared for that kind of music.
No, you didn't.
And then the other music that was going on at that time, the reason I ended up going
to R&B so much was the other part was like Janis Joplin and all that type of music.
Psychedelic shit.
That stuff was crazy to me.
Ew.
Jimi Hendrix?
Yeah, it kind of turned a corner with some of that.
You really got to get into that.
A lot of those guys were doing acid, just smoking too much.
LSD was the big thing then.
LSD.
But the thing is, if you're not doing LSD, outside of LSD, which is way, I mean, I'm
sure, I don't know if they had mushrooms back then, but you know, the reefer they had
back then was called reefer for a reason.
I mean, it was just.
What's that mean?
It's pot.
So.
Reefer.
The pot back then wasn't as potent as the pot they have nowadays.
The pot they have nowadays is like.
Can be really dangerous.
Well, it's just, it's stronger is my point.
So you can sit there and smoke a whole doobie and you'd be like, yeah, I'm just, I'm just
chilling.
They cross bread and everything.
So now it's GMOs.
Yeah.
Well, they have hydroponics and all kinds of things.
And it's just.
It's Roy Clark.
Oh, there it is.
Did you ever have patrons smoke marijuana in the bar?
Was that ever allowed?
I don't ever remember that.
No, I was going to say your mom probably kicked him out if that was the case.
She was pretty firm with the customers.
She didn't deal with a lot of bullshit.
She partied with them too, right?
She would take shots with them.
My mother used to drink gin and water.
Oh, I tried.
Hold on.
That's awful.
I'll tell you what.
I went through a period where this is going to sound even worse.
I drank gin and hot water.
What is wrong with you?
Hot water and lemon.
Why?
Were you fighting a virus?
I had a sore throat.
He was fighting COVID back then.
I had a sore throat.
And that's I had it in the house.
And you know what?
It tasted great.
You were desperate and you tried it.
It tasted really good.
You put honey in it, you said?
No, hot water.
Lemon.
I put lemon in it.
I put hot water, like tea, because I was trying to figure out, you know, I want to do something in gargle or something.
I started drinking this.
And after a while, it started tasting good.
And I was like, I'm digging this.
Like after 10 of them?
After 10 bottles, perhaps.
So that became your drink for a while?
Yeah, like for six months.
Oh my God.
During the wintertime.
I mean, it tasted.
You're nuts.
It tasted good to me.
You know, in fact, what I would do when I come home is I would turn on the coffee pot.
And I would just run hot water and I would put coffee in it.
I just run hot water, put it on the burner, leave it going.
I'd make another drink, pour it, mix it with some gin, sit there with a little lemon.
And I would sit there and drink it like a hot tea.
Yeah.
And it was good.
I enjoyed it.
So I had a gin and tonic and it was a one and done.
I got to a party.
Somebody handed me a gin and tonic.
I had just come from Whataburger.
No, no, no.
I brought my Whataburger with me to the party.
Gobbled my Whataburger down.
I was so excited.
Somebody handed me a gin and tonic.
I drank it and I lost my Whataburger.
Really?
I'll never get it back.
What?
What's going on over there?
I hurled.
My whole Whataburger came up when I drank the gin and tonic.
It was a one and done.
Never again gin.
Forget it.
I think we're doing what with bourbon.
We're getting to the gin now.
I'll tell you what.
I'm out.
I was drinking gin and tonic.
Nasty ass shit right there.
Beef Eaters was like one of the first cliche gin drinks.
Beef Eaters gin.
Tangaray.
I was drinking something else.
Tangaray came around afterwards.
It wasn't either one of that.
Beef Eaters or Tangaray.
Oh, a different kind of gin you mean?
Yeah, it was a lot cheaper than that I think.
It's called ass.
But I was drinking gin and tonic and smoking cool cigarettes.
Oh my gosh.
Menthol?
Were they menthol?
Menthol.
That's some super menthol.
So what was the biggest seller out of your trunk?
The biggest seller.
The fastest moving merchandise item.
Vodka.
You can mix it with anything.
Vodka is so universal.
You can't smell it.
You can mix it with anything.
To all these kids going home.
And back then they even had a couple flavors.
No.
Yeah, they had like strawberry I think it was.
I thought that was a recent thing.
No, they had cherry vodka.
It's all in circles.
It was cherry vodka.
I had no idea.
Yeah, I remember that real well because I got sick on cherry vodka.
What was the gin?
Was it like the Plymouth gin?
He already said it was ass.
No, no, no.
He did not say it was ass.
You said it was ass.
That actually sounds pretty close.
It was ass.
Plymouth gin.
There's a Booth's gin.
Plymouth sounds pretty close to it.
Gordon's gin came out in the 70s.
That's it.
Gordon's?
Gordon's gin.
Gordon's?
Okay.
Yeah, it's got the gold label and kind of the square bottle.
Yeah.
That was the gin that you sold?
No, that he drank.
I was drinking.
Yeah.
Oh, I thought you said your mom drank it and it was nasty.
Why would you drink it?
I drank it with tonic.
She drank it with water.
Look, everything is an acquired taste.
It is.
Once you start drinking it, I mean, hell, beer is.
I mean, the first time I drank beer, I was going, have you lost your fucking mind?
You guys are drinking this shit.
I'm with you.
It was awful.
There you go.
See it?
Yellow label.
I still remembered it.
That's it.
It's got a Warthog on it or something.
See, that's what we do, Alan.
We do a lot of reminiscing.
Arkansas.
What is that product?
You know, those.
So it's made out of what kind of berry?
Gin berry?
Juniper.
Juniper berry.
That's right.
Yeah.
Juniper berry.
It's very unique.
It's actually a.
You still make that?
It's actually a South African gin.
Well, it says England.
It says distilled and bottled in South Africa.
What were you saying about a juniper berry they make?
That's what gin is made out of.
That's what all gins are made out of.
It's the base.
Aha.
I had no idea.
Yeah.
The tequila is from the Blue Gabba plant.
So that's why gin is so bad, because juniper berry sucks.
Whoa.
It looks good though.
Gin is awful.
Sorry, bros.
You were really angry about losing that water burger.
I lost that water burger and it was a hard night.
I think we did try some gin.
Just like we tried Evan Williams, you fought your demons and you got it down.
These demons on this white label, Evan Williams, will be here for a while.
Thank you, Jeff.
So you got this bar.
You're in the 50s, 60s and you said it's a country bar.
So like you were saying, you got Roy Clark.
You got the old school stuff.
So were you in there listening to all this music?
We actually had a live band every weekend.
Really? Saturday night?
Was it like Buck Owens kind of stuff?
Yeah, it was...
I'll tell you what they had back then, country western music.
They had that electric guitar, that twang.
That's where that twang comes from.
Slide guitar.
It's an electric guitar.
It's like a guitar on four legs.
And you can really twang that thing.
You're talking about twang.
So that's not a slide guitar.
That's a harpist chord.
Is that what it's called?
No.
Because they have a little metal thing.
The guy that played the slide guitar, they put a little metal thing on their finger
and they slide it.
They hold the guitar normally.
I thought that was a slide guitar when they were sitting down at the table.
Yeah, right.
I thought that was a slide guitar.
They called it an electric guitar.
I bet you.
Look at that up.
What's that?
Pedal steel guitar.
Steel guitar.
Pedal steel guitar.
It's a console type of steel guitar with pedals and knee levers that change the pitch of a
certain strings to enable playing more varied complex music than just the regular guitar.
Because the slide is when they held it like a normal guitar, slide guitar, and they just
got a little thing that they put over their finger.
Look up slide guitar.
Well, any guitar is a slide guitar when you have that little...
Thimble.
...little penis sheath over it.
It's about that low like this when you bring it up and down.
Finger sheath.
That's a slide guitar.
But hold on.
Any guitar could be a slide guitar.
So they have another type for the pedal steel guitar they have.
Instead of having one that fits around your finger...
They hold it.
It almost looks like a roll of nickels.
It's solid.
It's a solid piece of metal.
Right.
We just looked at that.
No, they didn't show that.
It's over the finger.
It's not over the finger.
You don't put your finger in it.
You hold it.
Well, that's kind of what they're doing.
On the steel guitar.
That's right there.
There it is.
Right there.
Oh, I see what you're saying.
Okay.
And they did the same thing on the steel guitar this way.
Yes.
They had this thing.
They held it and moved it up and down.
In fact, Mr. Producer, can you pull up an audio of Sleepwalk?
You're talking about the song Sleepwalk?
Yeah.
Oh, okay.
I've never heard of that.
So this one is made with...
Is this Santo and Johnny?
I don't know.
You didn't give enough information.
I knew it was going to fail.
He said any Sleepwalk.
Well, whatever.
Just play it.
Yeah, but how is that going to work?
Oh, that's Dick Clark.
...you're about to meet their names in Santo and Johnny.
Well, maybe...
Now they're brothers.
Now...
Yes, now, my...
Dick Clark.
...song.
...is not coming.
Listen to what songs were like.
There you go.
There's the steel...
See, there you go.
It's a classic...
There we go.
All right.
I'm going to retract.
You did...
You got this one.
I know.
You think you got the babes?
This was a hot song.
This song is still hot today.
It's still hot.
It is.
It's a fantastic song.
Oh, this song's right up your alley, Al.
He's jamming on that too, man.
I have that song on one of my playlists.
It's what he says Sleepwalk, I knew he was talking about.
Absolutely.
All right.
Very nice.
All right.
Thank you, producer.
And the women would love it too.
They'd be like, oh, look at...
You play the pedal steel guitar?
Oh, he is so dreamy.
And you're wearing that jacket.
Yes.
And your hair's all curled up and moose.
With the dice.
It's got greased all down.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, what is up with that?
Alan, what is up with the whole greasing?
Was that your look?
Was that your look back then?
The Sha-Na-Na era.
Or the West Side boys.
West Side story.
They're all slicking their hair back.
So what'd you do to your hair?
Did you hit...
Was your hair all like...
Did you have a D.A.?
What?
I didn't have much hair.
Duck's ass?
Yes, you did.
He had a duck's ass is what it is.
I comb my hair the same way I am right now except it had more of it than it went on the
side.
And it wasn't white.
It wasn't white.
It didn't turn white until I was 15.
Wow.
It's like a Vinnie Barberina.
Yeah, but I'll tell you what, that hair...
Think about Fonzie, what he did.
Oh yeah.
Fonzie and that part of it.
He never touched his hair.
He was the tough guy, right?
Yeah, he was like, hey.
Oh yeah.
And that's what you did.
They had that black, that real heavy duty black hair and they put grease on it and it
was like, got something going back.
That's what the pillow looked like.
Yeah, grease.
But only the guys...
The movie Grease.
Regular people in school didn't do that.
Oh, just the greasers?
It was like the gang.
A lot of greasers, didn't it?
How you say it?
I mean, they were like gangs.
They were like these cliques that did that, mostly Spanish guys.
Really?
Yeah.
Is that what they call them, greasers?
Yes.
Really?
That was the term you gave them?
Yeah, that's the term they had, yeah.
That was just a...
Yeah, that was the term, greasers, because they would have greasy hair and they would...
Not just greasy hair, but they would use the products in their hair that would make it
extra greasy.
Like motor oil?
Perhaps, some sort of version of that, but probably something that's a little bit safer
for the head.
But the idea was to take the hair and slick it back so it would stay.
I mean, you could be in a windstorm, shit ain't moving.
Right.
No.
And they didn't have hairspray, I don't think then.
Whatever that was, they kept it there.
They probably had hairspray, I don't know.
Basically, it's like...
I didn't use it, but I'll tell you what.
It's like petroleum jelly.
It's just, you know, once that thing coagulates, it's just like it's there.
You know, the freaking cannon.
Anyway, but whether they were...
I'm not saying only Spanish people, but if you were in that gang or that little...
Whatever they had, most of them, they called it gangs, obviously, like they do today.
The Jets, the Sharks.
There was white, Spanish, Italian, Spanish, Mexican, whatever, and that's exactly how
all the guys comb their hair.
But they were real gangs, though.
They really got into it with each other and there was real crime back then, right?
It's all tribal.
I mean, it's all, you know, in the inner city, depending on where you live.
I don't know how much that shit was flowing around in Pueblo, Colorado.
No, there's a lot of it.
Was there?
Yeah, tell some stories.
You got the Italians and the this and the that.
Pueblo was called Little Chicago.
Bulgarians?
No shit.
I never even heard about that.
I mean, now that we're talking about it, it makes sense because Pueblo is a big city.
And it's in the center of the United States.
150,000 people.
So many there's so much influence because of all.
I mean, that is a main vein for where all the train stations have come through.
So you have the opportunity for a lot of different ethnic ethnicities to evolve there.
So I can only imagine.
Well, the way they started their apartment.
But what happened was when they built that steel mill, the integrated steel mill where
you brought iron ore and coke together, limestone, it's that gigantic one that you can see from
twenty five, right?
And that's what that's what starts to make steel.
And then you bring it in there and then you get it to twenty two hundred degrees and you
start making steel.
Right.
But you had to bring all that in, especially the iron ore and the coal and the whole shot
into the mix.
Still correct.
Right.
Well, they didn't have nobody in Pueblo at that time to work there.
So like my family, my grandparents were brought over from Italy, came into New Orleans, not
in Rikers Island, but in New Orleans.
And then they made their passage to go to Pueblo, Colorado to work there.
That's how they paid their passage.
Oh, wow.
You have what they called the Bojans back then.
You had Italians.
Who do they call it?
And then the Bojans, Bojans were Yugoslavian at that time is what they were from.
OK, as Yugoslavians.
And then you had the Spanish people, just literally spent Spain's Spanish, not Mexican
and indentured servants basically.
Or is that you and then you had a way through and you get to pay it back with the they just
got paid for coming over.
And that's how they paid it back.
So they went to work.
My grandfather was like 12 when he went to work in the.
Yeah.
14 when he worked.
That's that's an indentured servant.
Anyway, but to get to your point.
They all lived in different parts of the city.
Right.
Segregated.
They were all segregated.
Everybody was segregated.
Irish, the Bojans, the Italians, the white people, and they stayed segregated.
Yeah.
And you didn't mess around with that.
And the reason we never learned how to talk Italian in our house is because they didn't
want you to know the people in town know you were Italian because you were discriminated
against.
Yeah, exactly.
So what are some of your father's that don't don't speak Italian because you didn't want
you guys to be shit on or pick.
You don't want to say that or say, hey, don't speak of Italian.
Did he have a did he have a dialect?
Thanks.
No, it is.
It is quite like that.
But but the bad could read English.
The man never could read English.
He could speak English, but he couldn't read it.
No.
But anyway, it's crazy.
My grandmother was one of 16 children.
My grandpa was one of eight.
It took him I can't remember, 10 years to get everybody into this country.
And then he talked about the Christmas.
I won't get into that whole thing.
But then they had all these families.
Imagine going back ahead of me.
Forty years.
Right.
Oh, me at that point.
And everybody and all these families and sisters and their kids and their kids all come into
one place.
Right.
To have Christmas Eve.
Christmas Eve started in the afternoon and it didn't end till midnight on Christmas night.
Party party party.
It was fair.
Everybody playing cards, drinking the homemade wines, doing the nice work.
I was amazing.
That was family.
Oh, that's family.
Yeah, that's family.
And then that and you didn't do anything with friends.
You didn't do anything with like that.
That was it.
It was all family.
Hundred percent family.
So the the the tribal or the gang stuff is literally just people on the outside.
And you know, I don't know, you meet them at work.
Remember, everybody's so isolated.
Then you protect your turf.
Yeah.
Because you got something going on or somebody wanted to go mess with your sister.
Hey, who's this guy?
And he'd come from the outside.
Who's this guy walking down the street?
No, but you kind of made a point.
It's like it's like outside a family, you go to work and they have some of them there.
No, no, maybe, maybe not.
You should answer that.
Like even at work, like were they segregated, like beginning to end at the job, at the this,
at the that or no about the job.
I don't know that part.
OK, what about the bar?
I mean, yeah, not the bar.
Did they not let you bar?
So they not let like certain types of people in.
My parents bar was set, however, 10 blocks from the steel mill.
So all the people come in there and get off the graveyard shift.
They started there at seven o'clock in the mornings when they walked in there, because
that was their shift like you and I get up.
They started drinking at the bar at seven a.m. because they worked the night shift.
It was just like you and I working a day shift going in at five o'clock.
How you open at seven in the morning or you opened up at seven o'clock.
So I had to clean it at six because they were getting off and they'd be at the door waiting
to open it.
Oh, now were these other Italians?
They were all walks.
I was just my boy.
I was going to say there was a lot of different.
I mean, a lot of different.
Everybody was different then.
It was people wanted to come together and drink.
It didn't matter where you're from.
They sit there and drink those seventy five cents shot.
Maybe they call the Boilermakers.
You know, they started dropping shots and drinks back back when I was grown up.
Right.
You know, they talk about now where you deal with makers are that was a popular drink.
Yeah, I was a boy maker.
You were a man when you were a boy.
But it was so it's a shot of something dropped into a shot of whiskey.
A beer dropped in a Tony Brooke.
Tony Brooke and Jim Beam was the biggest thing.
You shot of Seagram seven, Seagram seven.
If you wanted something smooth, smoother.
Right.
A shot of Sonny Brooke dropped into a glass of beer, Walter's beer or and then you chug
the whole thing.
Miller beer, Miller High Life back then.
I don't think I've ever tried the Budweiser together.
All right.
I mean, it's challenging.
It's fantastic.
It was just one of those things that, you know, it was free.
Oh, you know, they did it.
It's probably like, hey, I'm going to buy you a shot of beer.
This is this.
Let's just down this real quick.
We got to head home and go beat the wife.
You know, why didn't you just have a glass of beer or a glass of beer and just pour?
What's the fascination with dropping it in?
You drop it in there.
A lot of dropped it in there.
Some of them just poured in there, but you poured it in the beer.
Right.
OK.
I'm curious about the fascination of dropping it in there just just because it's fun.
Yeah.
It wasn't like it kept dropping.
Rated until you did something.
I think just I think that got to get that.
That doesn't really do a whole lot.
In fact, it's stupid to drop showmen.
You're spilling it everywhere.
It's not a matter of that.
It's a matter of chipping the glass.
And then, you know, I don't know how well the I guess the glasses were made well back
then.
But you get an opportunity to chip the glass and then drink the chip.
Check this out.
So I was at a place called a sushi sushi bar called Raw on Legacy West legacy west, like
the east and look at me.
Saki bombs.
Look at the sake.
That's right.
So there would be a glass of sake and over the sake glass, you would put chopsticks and
then you would put.
Yeah.
You'd put a shot of sake, sake over beer.
Correct.
OK.
And then you all of you all you have all of you have that set up and then you bang the
table until the chopsticks separate and the thing drops.
Talk about a mess.
That's got general liability written all over.
Dude, it's a mess.
The shit's going everywhere.
I would rather.
It is a Mexico city.
I mean, I guess it's fun because we're all banging it until it fell in and then you're
supposed to, you know, chug it, you know, bunch of tards.
Anyway, that that and then obviously red beers, red beers.
OK, now red beers is interesting.
They've what does that mean?
Like a Bloody Mary and beer.
Or tomato juice in it.
The chalada beer with tomato juice is a red beer.
Don't take those red beer.
No, that was the Hispanic version of it.
I think that was 35 cents.
Essentially, they have some lime and some seasoning in the chaladas.
But it's not too bad.
They taste good.
There's nothing.
They don't taste bad at all.
Hold on.
A chalada.
Walk me through what the chalada.
That's another big beer.
Yeah, Ham's was a big beer back then.
Yeah, Ham's.
Wow.
Yeah, there's some old school.
Ham's Ham's was like my dad used to like that.
All right.
Look, back in the day, the government used to make another big one.
A beer.
Yeah.
The government used to make everything.
All right.
So when I say everything, they would have a government brand of bread.
They have a government brand of peanut butter, a government brand of it.
It'd be like this white packaging.
Give them a cheese and yeah, cheese.
It'd be this white package.
How was it Germany?
No, no, this was in the United States and they would have something that said beer.
Okay.
And that's what it was.
Ham's Ham's was the beer that was the generic beer that the government sold.
It's a little factoid there.
So yeah, because you go to the store and it doesn't say anything.
It just says fucking beer.
I mean, there's no that's it.
What do you want?
You beer.
You want bread?
It was labeled for that sounds like Soviet Russia.
Well, it kind of was, but it was more designed for like, like I said, the military for, you
know,
have you ever had a hams?
Yes.
It's good.
It's not a bad beer.
It's like a Olympia.
It's just a was it was it that the beer that had the bear is one that was the icon for
the hams bear.
I don't remember.
I think it was a bear.
I just know the song.
My dad used to sing it appears a beer is a beer is a beer until you taste good hams.
Oh, really?
I think it was a bear, literally a bear that was the one that was the hams logo.
Well, there was it was it was a big pig.
So there there was a fact it was the plus the twins.
So they the the the Pabbo hams beer bear in the twins.
He said that a lion lion.
That is but they OK.
So they have a if you want a land of sky blue waters, there's a bear right there.
There it is.
That's right there.
That's what I remember.
That's like Yogi from the land of sky blue waters.
That's what I remember.
There you go.
The big one where I had was I realized my memory was just good was huge.
We had a huge poll.
Wait for the second podcast.
We're going to go down and tear it up a little bit.
I'm sorry, Jeff.
Go ahead.
Now, the one I didn't I didn't grow up really drinking hams.
We had a huge poll and we what was that huge poll?
I've never heard that in my life heard that.
Yeah, it's a look up Walters beer.
You know, producer, you pull up, you pull beer and yingling pops up.
No, did one by the other yingling by that?
I don't know.
The hudapol was a Cincinnati beer.
This is Walt.
Oh, no, there's one.
How do you spell it?
Judy Gold.
That's Walters.
That was distilled.
Everything was made in Pueblo, Colorado.
Really?
Looks like yes.
I do.
I do remember Walters beer.
I mean, I lived in Colorado for a section of my life.
We lived in Colorado Springs, Colorado for Carson.
Oh, yeah.
You're 37 miles north of Pueblo.
For how long?
Well, probably two years.
You were two years old?
No, you asked me how long, not when.
I'm kidding.
All right.
Second grade.
So eight years old.
You were eight years old.
You were a big beer drinker back then.
No, but I do remember.
He was 14 in the second grade.
You know, it's crazy.
I was 14.
Yeah, my dad, I don't.
So if you were, I put a little pin point where we used to live and then I put a pin where
you ever like zoom into Google and see the entry to NORAD in the side of the mountain?
I've never done that before.
Never done that.
All right.
Well, I have.
So I have my house and I have NORAD.
It's like two miles away.
So you could have been saved if there was a nuclear strike you had to run?
I think my dad would have abandoned us.
Oh, that's depressing.
Oh, well, he can.
They said NORAD.
You can start another one.
What if the first installation to be taken out in the United States would be NORAD?
No, it's in a mountain.
It can't be taken out.
Oh, yeah, it can be taken out.
These bombs today, they probably can be.
Yeah, these bunker busters can.
But I don't think NORAD.
You can take out anything now.
I know.
NORAD's a little bit, NORAD's a little different, but I think that some of you're right.
Some of the technology now, I think they don't use NORAD anymore.
NORAD has been abandoned as far as.
No, that's not true.
They track Santa with it.
That's true.
Did you hear about them tracking Santa this past year?
Plus, the way you could always tell where NORAD was and you see all these damn antennas
on top of that mountain.
We had.
Nothing but antennas all over.
You ever notice that?
No.
Nothing but antennas on top of that mountain where NORAD was.
Yeah, that's true.
That's pretty obvious.
In fact, Paul, if it's not far on the way to your dad's cabin.
Yeah.
In fact, if you're looking on top of that little mountain, well, that's where it's at.
Do they have tours?
Really?
NORAD is Pike's Peak?
It's not far.
Colorado Springs.
Pike's Peak is a little further north.
Yeah, it's not really not further.
Not that garden of the gods.
Dude, I could see Pike's Peak from my front yard.
Pike's Peak is further north.
So there was a phone call that someone had called in to celebrate the the sighting of
a Santa Claus from the NORAD.
NORAD was calling in.
So they had this dad is like, oh, my gosh, yes, we're NORAD.
And we have sighted Santa.
And we want to report this and Joe Biden and his wife got on the TV and they were like,
oh, so what's going on?
And so they have this full conversation and they talk about the kids and they talk about
this and that.
And at the very end of the conversation, the guy is like, I want you to have a wonderful
Christmas and I want you to have a wonderful Christmas and then and let's go, Brandon.
Yeah, let's go, Brandon.
Joe Biden says, yeah, that's right.
Let's go, Brandon.
He repeated it inept.
How?
That guy was getting torn.
He is.
He is bad.
Look, Alan, do you do you know when I say let's go, Brandon, what that means?
I do not.
OK, so there let's just move forward for rest of this conversation.
There was a there was an event and they were saying, fuck Joe Biden.
Fuck Joe Biden.
And the crowd is chanting it.
They've been doing this in every sporting event across the.
So the the newscast caster, she was like, oh, look, they're saying let's go, Brandon.
Let's go.
So she was interviewing a Brandon driver who won the NASCAR.
So they were now what a joke.
So now everyone says instead of saying fuck Joe Biden, which is kind of, you know, rad,
mean, just not real nice.
They say they say let's go, Brandon.
So it means the exact same thing.
But my point is, is that this came out seven months ago.
OK, they hate it.
Oh, they.
Joe Biden knows about it.
So if you knew that that let's go, Brandon equals fuck Joe Biden and someone were to
say that, I mean, especially if I'm Joe Biden, you wouldn't say that.
I know he would go on man immediately.
He would say, come on, man.
Or he would shake his head in disgust.
But the fact that he didn't get it, he goes, yes, right.
He said, let's go, Brandon.
He said, OK, yeah, let's go, Brandon.
So I'm kind of repeated it.
But that's my point.
That's why I think that the elevator is not going all the way up.
And it scares me out of there is no elevator, bro.
And I don't want to.
I don't want to.
The point of this topic isn't to beat him up.
I feel bad for him because I think it's on the verge of elderly abuse is elderly.
And I just like, come on, this guy doesn't have he doesn't know what's going on.
And honestly, I don't think he's even running the show.
I think it's the Obamas that are running the show.
And I think they want to continue this campaign.
And I hate I know you don't talk about positive, but they want to continue this campaign because
they're starting to bring up Michelle Obama to be starting the twenty twenty four presidential
election.
Oh, wonderful.
Yeah.
They introduced her name and they officially put it in the play.
But they were like, yeah.
Or who was Michelle Obama?
Barack's man wife.
Her biggest accomplishment was making school lunches.
It was horrible.
Not edible anymore.
But my point is, is that, you know, they had said that and I felt bad because I was going
to be.
He said he was making a joke.
How can he not know that?
Let's go, Brandon.
I mean, because if you hear it once, you hear it twice.
They've been saying it nonstop every single day for seven months in his presence.
And I was like, dude, when are you going to learn that that means go fuck yourself?
Yeah, but that guy is being like, what are you getting?
Death threats.
He's getting death threats.
The father that made that joke.
Fuck it.
He cares.
And first off, he didn't know it was being live streamed is what he said.
Yeah, he did.
Did he?
Yeah, he did.
In fact, he used the words.
The guy that said, let's go, Brandon?
Yes.
Yeah.
He's getting death threats.
So what?
Yeah, whatever.
I mean, they're going to pull through with it.
The thing is, is that he said as soon as they as soon as he said it, the line was cut.
Oh, yeah.
I think it's kind of funny.
It is a little funny.
It's sad, but it's funny.
Well, yeah.
Merry Christmas.
Merry Christmas stuff.
That was kind of the point of the whole thing.
And, you know, how was your Christmas, Paul?
It was great.
We had a lot of fun.
Well, hold on.
What was your favorite gift?
Dildo.
Jeff.
Oh, Jeff.
Jeff spoke out of line.
Jeff, you saying your favorite gift was a dildo?
No, I get a dildo every year.
It's a little.
Oh, that's your tradition.
That's your tradition.
It's just not that fun.
And I tell them, guys, I don't need another one.
You need the double ended with the kung fu grip.
What's a kung fu grip?
I'm trying to remember.
What did I get?
Oh, I got some kickass shoes.
You know what?
You know, we've downplayed gifts for each other and we really we really focus on the
kids like what they would.
So what do they want?
They don't want anything.
Oh, we got one of them.
Got a the ocular ocular deal.
What do you call the VR deal?
Oculus.
Yes.
And they want to close, which they they're freaks about.
They did good.
Right.
I mean, help me out here.
Oh, yeah, they did great.
I mean, yeah, they got a lot of sweatpants and shirts.
You know what tennis shoes and I'm going to tell you the gift that just Shelley and I
got.
You got gifts.
Mr. Father in law over here paid for an all expensive paid vacation to Mexico this summer.
Wow.
I'll tell you what, we're going to.
Yes, he did.
We're going to take a dudes like this pause.
We're going to talk about those gifts and much, much more.
And we're also going to talk about why certain other folks weren't invited to the same package.
That's all coming up in the next second.
Oh, wow.
Very scandalous leading.
Yeah.
Well, you know, it's all about me.
All right.
Well, thanks for listening to dudes like us.
I'm Paul.
I'm Sean.
Jeff.
And you are a star hot rugged.
Shaka.
Alan.
Thank you very much.
Don't worry about you.
Just fucking broke the mic.
You're broken.
Damn it.
I'm going to have to get to the second half.
All right.
We'll catch you guys on the flip side.
What's the.