This second half might be interesting because
I feel like I've been over -served. Hell yeah.
We can blame Chuck for that one. We did the pre
-pre. He's like, you guys want a pre? Little
do we know it's 137 proof. Little did you know.
He tells us after the fact. 137 .4. Sorry. Well,
you're not supposed to say anything about it
yet. This is the... We're not really working,
but we have to work, but we're working from home
because we're snow days. Yes. And you're not
working at all. I'm sleeping in. Dude, this is
a recipe for disaster. And you've got a drive
home, don't you? I can be— You four -wheeling
it? I have a Bronco, bitch. The Bronco can do
anything, even on solid ice. All right, let's
do this. Second half. Second half of the Dudes
Like Us podcast. Whoa. That was a good flavor.
Was that a slur? Was that a slur? We haven't
seen that from him in a long time. Welcome back,
Jeff. Well, here's the thing. We like slurring,
Jeff. No, I was slurring. I thought I slurred
for a second. Oh, you did. The first half, we
only had, there was not even 90 proof. Granted,
we drank half a cup of it. It was very tasty
as hell. Anyway, it's January 27th. It's the
second half of the Dudes Like Us podcast. We're
dialed in, guys. We've got Chuck as our producer
up here. We've got a jam -packed show ready to
rock and roll. And furthermore, we've got TikTok.
Check us out on Dudes Like Us. I don't know the
specific call name for it, but just look up Dudes
Like Us podcast. Actually, it's Dudes Like Us
pod is what it is on TikTok. Check us out on
the Dudes Like Us podcast for the YouTube. YouTube
is big, man. Dude, I have avid listeners that
did not know that we have videos on YouTube now.
They're like, what? And they went and checked
it out and they're like, dude, it's working.
I was like, damn right it's working. Hell yeah,
it's working. Hell yeah. Bitch. Bitch. Smack
that YouTube. I didn't call him a bitch because
I love the guy. Instagram and Facebook. Check
out dudeslikeus -podcast. We also have dudeslikeus
-woodcraft if you want those awesome doohickey
things that we make. Yeah, I say we frame tomorrow.
In the 20s. Well, I work tomorrow. What is tomorrow?
As long as you're outside. Today's Wednesday.
I think, right? Yeah, today's Tuesday. Do it
like real men outside on the driveway. Screw
that. I have no desire. Nude. Nude framing. With
saws. Power tools. And your junk is hanging there?
Oh, dude, no. I've got enough problems in Jeff's
garage. That's all going to be like. Junk jammed
up from some sort of planer thrown. Everything's
going to be dangling. It's going to get wrapped
around like something. Oh, dude, we're totally
putting something. You wish that your junk could
get caught in the table saw. Are you kidding
me? Like, I was like running wood into the planer
and it shot back out of me. It did. Right into
the nut. 150 miles per hour. Into your junk?
It was. I thought it severed my penis. You're
like, God, let's do some work. It didn't hit
my nutsack. It hit my dick. And I swear to God,
I thought it got severed. Aren't you glad that
the dick doesn't have the same nerve endings
as the balls do? Did it swell? Imagine if it
had hit the balls, like directly on the balls.
Honestly, the region was affected, which includes
the balls. It took a little bit. It took like
10, 15 seconds. Oh, it was funny. And then it
started caking in. He just stepped back and just
went. He got silent. So he didn't. So that's
the deal. Hold on. So you didn't grab and fall?
No, he just stood there. You didn't crumple?
Like, what the hell just happened? You took it
like a man. I needed to be prepared to make sure
that, do I need to pick my dick up off the floor?
Walk me through what shot at you? Well, I have
a planer downstairs that I was making. I actually
have the cutting board. I was doing edge grain.
It's ash, right? No, it's maple. It's maple.
It's very hard wood. Yeah, you don't fuck with
maple. Yeah, but end cuts. End grain, I made
it from scratch, so I cut it up, all the shit,
and I glued it, so I needed to plane it. Turned
out really great. And Sean, yeah, I'll show it
to you downstairs. Yeah. And Sean was over, and
I was like, hey, I need to plane this real quick.
So he was like, all right. So I got my planer
out. We started feeding it through, and one time
it went through, and it went, and it went. Nope.
I don't want to go through. Hold on, hold on.
What happened? Every time you run it through
a planter, you bring it. It grabs it. It grabs
it. Well, it does grab it. It's got this rubber
feeder, and it pulls it in, and then it scoops
off a 16th of an inch, maybe a 32nd. It's the
coolest thing ever, by the way. It looks like
shit, and then suddenly it. trims off that thin
layer and it looks amazing. It just dimensions
it and then once it gets dimensioned to the preferred
size then you take it out. But we were bringing
it down but the problem can be on certain woods
that are harder like the hard maple and the end
grain is that when you take off too big of a
bite it has a negative effect on the blades that
are trying to cut it down. The blades are kind
of like, hey, it's a little draw. You can't get
that through there. You got to bring it. So we
used to take off a 30 second. You need to drop
it down to like a 64th or something. It doesn't
matter. We grabbed too much. I put the board
in there. That motherfucker shot back at me with
a vengeance. Oh, it was bad. It was so fast.
Yeah, it was instant, instant, instant. It went
in and Julie was standing there. She was behind
you. Yeah. And she was like. And went, bam! And
I was just like, and you went, ooh! Oh, my whole
body did a systems check. That's why Jeff was
talking about the no look on my face is because
my whole body was just like, okay, checking.
Is there any blood on the floor? Okay, check.
No good. For the record, if you weren't aroused
while doing planing, it would have helped you.
Well, dudes like us, I'm Sean. Severed the nutsack.
I'm Paul. And I'm Jeff. Yeah. Welcome to Dudes
Like Us podcast, guys. A strong second half.
You know what? That happens, though. I mean,
I love woodcrafting. I love working all the machines,
and we weren't drunk or anything. I don't think
we had a beer. No, just stupid. Shit happens.
No, I mean, it's not that. No, it was working.
Boom, boom, boom. I think we just made an adjustment.
I think it just grabbed a great boom. People
are like, do I really want to spend an extra
$100 on a tool, regardless of what it is? My
answer to that is yes, because every specific
tool, you can go to. Are you saying a more expensive
planer would keep it from smashing into your
ball? 100%. No, I don't think 100%. It still
could happen. 99 .9. But what I'm getting at
is that if you go to like Harbor Freight and
you buy specific tools, those things work. I've
had a Harbor Freight tool that works for fucking
ever, and it works like a champ. I could take
that thing and throw it in the bucket in the
back of my truck, and it would sit there without
a lid on it. It would rain, snow, and everything.
The thing would get wet. I'd take it out, and
it worked every single time. It was loud, but
it worked every single time. But when it comes
to certain tools, like a planer that is dependent
on its torque, And the amount of power it has,
sometimes, man, it's just better off. Go for
the higher end. Those blades are spinning fast.
Yep, yep, yep. And we probably didn't even swap
out those blades. They're probably the factory
blades that came with it. Well, thankfully, you
produced the four kids that you wanted. I already
had them, so I don't care. He did one of a sect,
but he got one that day. Boom. Let it happen.
Bring it in. Boom. It's not the balls. My balls
are fine. It's the shaft. It's my shaft. That's
not being used. No one's using that thing. I
don't pee anymore. I spritz. It's like a spritz
that comes out. The boar came like this and went...
It's like a soaker hose now. It's like a soaker
hose that just kind of dribbles out the sides.
I'm telling you, man, it made me rethink life
for about 10 seconds. Everyone was looking at
me. We all recognized what happened. There's
a moment you're gathering all your faculties.
Did you guys hug? What just happened? Did you
hug and say, I love you, man? I love you. The
machine was still going. It was still spinning.
I had to turn around and flip it off. He's just
like. All right. Let's move on. Be honest. My
penis shaft was black and blue. Does it work
like that? Oh, you're such a liar. Why would
I lie about that? Are you being for real? Are
you kidding me? That thing took... It was like
a truck that hit me. It came out bad. I can say
with absolute certainty I've never had a penis
bruise. You could break your dick. You know that.
Well, thank you, Jeff. You could break your dick.
No, in fact, I know... You can break it. I have
a friend that... He had a younger woman and...
She was bouncing on top of it, and it landed
wrong. It broke it. He had to go to the hospital.
You have to get surgery. That's how it happens.
What do they do in that situation? Do they put
a little rod in there? I don't know. There's
Dr. Nicole Bush, who is a specialist on this.
Yeah, imagine that. Actually, that was her old
name. It's probably different now. Was it Westheimer?
Wasn't Peter North? Her name. Hello, Dr. Bush.
Yeah, well, I think her original name was Nicole
Corbin. I think that's her name. And then she
got married to a guy named Bush, and she worked
in a... Old Harry. Old Harry. Harry Bush. Shut
up. I swear to God. You are spunking us right
now. No, Nicole Corbin was a Dallas Cowboy cheeler.
On top of that, she was a Dallas Cowboy cheeler,
and she cheered with Tara in the same class.
No shit. It wasn't Harry, it was Seymour. She
became a doctor, and I forget what that, what
is it? Urologist? Urology, it was a very specialized
one that really dealt with. Bent penises. Yeah.
There's a thing that corrects it. Like a broken
penis? Yeah. I think it envelops or includes
the broken penises, but there are some guys out
there that when they get erect, there's stuff
like, you know. Well, it's actually a disease.
It goes left or right. Yeah, there's actually
a disease that will bend your dick. You have
to have surgery to fix that. Well, I'm not too
familiar with all that. Is it like a, you know,
like when they put like a. Look up bent penis
disease. No, don't put that on your face. No,
it's a real thing. Please don't. Do you have
to wear like a brace? Well, hell, they made a
city out of it in Oklahoma. It's called Bent
Bro, right? Broken Bow. Broken Bow. There it
is. Oh, my God. Do we need to be looking at this?
Peroni. Peroni. That's Peroni's disease. Peroni's
disease, huh? Sounds like a drink. Peroni. Good
Lord. Sounds like a guy. Can you make me a Peroni?
Can you imagine the poor guy that goes in there
and he's kind of like, hey, you're rubbing my
side. What's going on here? It's nice to meet
you, Mr. Peroni. What seems to be the problem?
Well, I've got a bent dick. When I have a boner,
it comes out the top. Instead of reverse cowboy,
she sits side saddle. It doesn't make it work.
We're going to call this disease after you, sir.
Yeah, you have to have surgery to fix that. For
Peroni's disease, take Xylantra once a day. And
he's dancing around. I think they unsheathe it.
Wow. So this is the second half. Should we start
over? This went wheels off very quickly. The
penis may appear shorter, narrow, or have a dented
appearance. Dented? I think yours is dented now.
It was dented. Like hail damage? I think the
bruising of it caused the dentation to kind of
bump out a little bit. Oh, shit. And it's all
calloused. Tara loves it. It's ribbed. You're
like, wow, it's all swollen. That big rib right
in the middle. Yeah, it's got a ring. It's ribbed
and swollen. You need to get injured more often.
She's like, I love that injury. Oh, God. All
right. Enough. Enough. We must move on. Let's
talk about the Melania movie. It's a ship that
made the Kessel run in less than 12 parsecs.
What? Millennium? Oh, you go from bed penis to
Melania. What the hell just happened, man? What
are you trying to say? I was doing a, what do
we call it? A shanway. You know what? And that's
fine, too. No, you have to go ring, ring. We
called it ring. That was awful, by the way. I
put that on YouTube. Did you? Ring, ring. And
you're like, I said, what are you doing right
now? And you went. Oh, it's a Sean way. It's
a Sean Segway. So I don't know. I saw the preview
for it. Melania. What's the story behind this
Melania movie? I actually saw a preview for it
today. It's a story of her life. It's a story
of her becoming the first lady, but it's in the
theaters, and I told you, I was like, I'll watch
that, but I'm not going to pay to go watch that.
No. But it's at the theaters. Hold on. Hold on.
Why is this not on? Why are you like that? It
has no desire to watch that. Like, I wouldn't
go see a documentary in the theater either. Is
it like two hours long? I have no idea. I mean,
why is it? This is going to sound shitty, but
why is it deserving to be in a movie theater?
I don't know. You know what? Here's my fix on
this. I agree with you there. Vanity Fair. She
is so mistreated. Absolutely. She, in my opinion,
she deserves it. She's awesome. She's awesome.
In fact, it really irritates me when some of
these local nighttime show hosts, Jimmy... Jimmy
Kimball. He's all making fun of her accent. I
was like, dude, what the fuck? She speaks like
six languages. Here's what's interesting about
this. I don't know the whole story behind it,
but the person who's the director did the Rush
Hour series. With Jackie Chan? Yeah. And Chris
something? He took a hiatus from filming anything,
but he's the director of this movie. Brett Ratner,
yes. American film director and producer, director
of the Rush Hour. He did X -Men. Red Dragon.
Yeah, he did X -Men as well. So he's like the
real deal. The Last Stand Tower Heist. No, it
looks like it's well done. So here's what's interesting.
Is he going to be - Blacklisted probably, yes.
Exactly. Like Carrie Underwood's being blacklisted
for singing at his inauguration? Like there's
some celebrities that you won't even look at
her. You know what? I don't care. And all that
shit's going to fall apart in three years when
he's out of the office and nobody just gives
a fuck anymore. It's what's happening right now.
And I'm so sick and I don't really want to dive
into all this politics stuff. I don't either.
But you know what? I want to touch base on this
just a little bit because all this stuff going
on in Minnesota is just... It's just buzz. It's
something to consume the airwaves. It is. And
it's disgusting. It is all -consuming. And frankly,
it's a little frustrating to have some of our
news outlets like Fox News that's just, not just
Fox News, but they're all talking about it and
there's nothing to talk about. To be fair, it's
a big deal. Like what's happening in Minnesota
is a big deal from like the riots and stuff.
But it was a big deal back when they had the
thing out there in the Northwest. out in Washington
state where they have the summer of love. I mean,
it was a big deal back then. Jazz and chop. But
you know, it's just like, it is bullshit. And
I think, and I swear to God, it pisses me off.
And it really irritated me the last podcast when
we started talking about this was that I want
consequences. You know, we have the technology
to find out every single. piece of poop that's
out there doing bad things. And you know what?
They have a bunch of stuff that's laying out
there in the open with those boxes of whistles
and face masks. And they're all pre -printed,
premeditated. Sean, they have a whole signal
chat with everybody's name in it. Yes. So, by
the way, after that signal chat thing got...
So, do you guys know what we're talking about?
So, there was a journalist that infiltrated...
SignalChat. I don't even know what SignalChat
is. It's basically like Instagram or something
like that. It's one of those super private ones,
supposedly, right? Can't hack it. Everything's
deleted, encrypted. That's what Hexeth got busted
on. Yes. Everything is hackable. Yeah. A journalist
got in there, infiltrated, and started taking
screenshots of it because you can't download
any of it, but you can take screenshots. And
so people are being exposed. And yes, it is exposing
the underbelly of the people who are paid. And
they're organized, and they have alerts, and
they're supposed to be here, bring this. They're
tracking license plates of federal agents and
other people that are on the side of ICE. It's
totally ugly. And they're basically saying, I
found that license plate here at the coffee shop.
Come descend upon them. Get your whistles out.
Let's get the protest together. They're not even
doing anything. They're just getting a cup of
coffee. Right? Right. Unbelievable. And they're
coming to that. They're at the hotel. And being
paid to do this. They're tracking license plates
somehow. Okay. So it's a very ugly situation.
And I think that's going to play out. And people
aren't going to stand for this. But hey, let's
go back. Let's go back to Melania. Melania. Melania?
Melania? It's Melania. It's Melania. That's what
I just said. Anyway, so I love that they're honoring
her like this. I do too. I love it. I think it's
great. I love it. And I hope it... I'm with you,
Jeff. I'm not... I don't want to go to the movie
theater. Yeah, it's that. I don't feel like being
inconvenienced by going to the movie theater.
Now, if they had something I would pay for it
on the internet, hey, man, just give us $5, $10.
Oh, I'd pay that. That's what I mean. I'll watch
it at home. I have no desire to go to the theater
to go see this. No, I wouldn't do that either.
Anyway, hour and 45 minutes. No, it's hour four.
No, I'm sorry. It's an hour and a half. 104 minutes.
Hour and 45 minutes -ish. Yeah, that's a lot
of math. How do we do that? How do we deal with
that math? It's an hour and 44 minutes. Oh, thank
you, Mathlete. Anyway, so I'm glad they're doing
that. I'm really glad they're doing that. $40
million budget. Do you see that? What the hell
is $40 million on? That's just marketing. Is
that marketing budget or the movie budget? Marketing
budget is reported to be $35 million. I've seen
the commercial once. Yeah. I saw it on the NFL.
It looked interesting. That's what I said. I
told you. I was like, I'll watch this. I'm going
to watch it too. I'm actually going to make an
effort to watch it as soon as it becomes non
-theater release. Why don't we make a Dudes Like
Us event and go out there and watch it? We could
live stream it. And get arrested. We'll have
to do a live stream and aim it at the video.
We're not doing anti -ice here, Jeff. I'm going
to bring my whistle. To the whole movie? I bet
there will be people doing that. Protesting?
She's the most harmless person thrown into politics.
I will bring my fart spray. She's married to
the evil one. Isn't it awful? It's awful that
she's subjected to this. I mean, Trump, he's
going to get what he gets because he's abrasive
and he will be in your face. So I get that response.
Not her. Not her. Not fair. Because I've never
heard her say anything derogatory ever. She's
beautiful. And she cares about children. And
she has rescued, she's gotten children, Ukrainian
children that got abducted and pulled into Russia,
worked out a deal with Putin to have them returned.
I mean, come on. She's, okay, whatever. I don't
get it. I do get it. I get the fact that. It's
the pettiness. It's petty. Yeah. It's so petty.
It's so petty. And the fact that they haven't
allowed her to be on any of these magazines,
it's just like, it's disgusting. But it's more
than that. It's hurtful to the other half of
the United States. And it also tells you who's
in charge. Correct. You know, it tells you who
the media and who's, it's. Crazy. Magazines are
probably going to be perishing anyways. Who's
buying that shit anyways? They've been dying
for a long time. It reminds me. I've been getting
my dad's Playboy magazine. Yeah, Playboy. Tent
Out is way better. It's a hunting. Hustler is
way better. It's a hunting magazine. It's not
Cherry. Oh, a nude hunting magazine. It was a
nude hunting magazine. And the last one I got
says on the cover, We're transitioning to online
only. Really? So, look, inside you'll have your
code to be able to get to your online copies.
Go to the centerfold. Well, they're trying to
cut costs every possible way they can. Well,
there's a lot of money involved in going to make
these magazines, to make comics, to make newspapers.
I'm surprised that these newspaper companies
are still a business. Well, the Washington Post
is going to lay off half their staff. Yeah. Half.
You know, yes. And I'm also thinking. how long
did my dad get a membership? He'll be dead for
two years in May. And I'm still getting the magazine.
And who's paying for that? No one. No one's paying
for it unless he paid for it in perpetuity. Maybe
he bought a lifetime subscription. I don't know.
I have a lifetime subscription to Hustler. I
don't even know if that still exists. Hustler
is such a... No, he's classy now. Who was the
guy that owned that? Larry Flint. Larry Flint.
There was a movie about him. Yes. That was actually
really good. Woody Harrelson. Yeah, he was good.
And who was Kurt Cobain's wife? Courtney Love.
Courtney Love was in it. Yeah. Oh, that's right.
Yeah. That was a while ago. Yeah, he had a lot
to do with Cincinnati, to believe it or not,
because I remember growing up, that whole court
case. of Larry Flint versus USA, I think it was.
That happened in Cincinnati, I think. Yeah, yeah,
yeah. Because I also remember there was a time
that he sent out a magazine. It was a thin magazine
of... It was called Highlights. No, it was not
porn. And my mom was pissed. I think you got
it, didn't you? That I got a hold of this because
I got the mail first. I was like, well, what
is this? And it was a book. full of pictures
showing... Ding -dongs? War. Men blown up in
war. Oh, God. So it was... Like graphic? 100%.
And it was 100 % real pictures. It was like war
photographs. Why? I don't know what he was...
I was young. I was probably 10, 11, 12. He was
a shock guy. But he just sent... Shock value.
He printed a million of these things and sent
them out to everybody. Why? Because he's a shock
guy. Okay. You know what, though? I think it's
important that... I mean, as awful as it may
be, sometimes you got to see shit like that.
I remember looking at it. It molds you to be,
look, because it's reality. And unfortunately,
you got to be exposed. I'm not saying that was
the best thing to do, but I think it's healthy
for people to be emotionally scarred like that
for a little bit. I don't know. I do. I think
it's important for people to learn the truth.
What's happening. To at least show respect for
what our soldiers have gone through in these
wars. I do understand that. And I don't know
the spirit of the pictures, if it was just gratuitous
pictures like that, or did it have some sort
of narrative on the side that described what's
going on? There was some language, I don't know
about it, but I just remember flipping through,
there was a bunch of pictures of guys blown to
pieces. Mangled. Mangled. I think I'd rather
see the centerfold. Yeah. Yeah, but I remember
my mom... As a 10 -year -old. My mom saw me looking
through it, and she grabbed it, and she was not
pleased. So it came in the mail? It came in the
mail. And you were just kind of... Yeah, I went
and got the mail, and I opened it, and I was
like, what's this? And I was flipping through
it. Was he running for office? No, I think he
was... No, I think they were protesting in Vietnam,
right? Yeah. Oh. Ah, here we go. So this was...
Also, was he basically protesting? Was he protesting?
Well, no. kid during Vietnam War. Yes, we were.
I guess you were. Yeah, we were. Yeah, we were.
We were. All of us were. So this was a protest.
It was the tail end of it. He was basically trying
to shit on the U .S. military for the atrocities
that they were. I bet you that's what it was.
And who knows? Who knows? Who knows? And frankly,
we don't. I mean, we read history, but the behind
the scenes stuff, we never know what's really
going on. And the way that... what really happened
to Vietnam and why were these decisions made?
And not just that, but any war. War is always
ugly. And you hear about what's -his -face from
Ukraine. What's the faggoty face in there? The
little short... Zelensky? Yeah, Zelensky. But
my point is that he is now pushing out this...
He wants to instill the New World Order. What?
He's in the WEF. So he's like the... Davos type
of person. Yeah, that seems to be his latest
push that he just mentioned. You know what? I
know that they have pushed off elections because
they're during wartime. Did we do that during
World War II? No. Was it in their constitution
to do that? Roosevelt just got it four times
in a row. Exactly. That was not anti -constitutional
though. We did not have that amendment until
after Roosevelt. Yeah, he got it four times in
a row. Because of the war. Yes. And then he died.
Yes. That's when what, Truman or Eisenhower took
over? Truman. Eisenhower, no, Truman first. Truman,
then Eisenhower. Because he dropped the bomb.
Okay, so I'm full of shit here when I say that
Zelensky is... pulling something that we didn't
do. We did do that. Yeah, but we course corrected
that. Yeah, we did. We held elections during
a war. There's something about their constitution
that says while they're at war, they're not going
to have elections. Correct. That's not cool.
Yeah. So he went ahead and enacted that and now
everybody's complaining because they're not having
elections, but it's kind of like in their constitution
not to. I get it. I get it, but it's still not
right. It's not right. My point is the dude needs
to go. Yeah, but can you impeach a standing president
in Ukraine? Good question. I don't know. Even
during wartime? If only we had Ukrainian friends.
That's a very good question. Yeah, Ukrainians
are going to have to do that. I mean, look, there's
not a whole lot of straight lines when it comes
to Zelensky's, you know, him being bought. And
just the whole line of shit that's going on.
Where's all the money? And by the way, once again.
We're talking about this politics stuff. Once
again, there's no transparency on where all the
freaking money went to. Well, Zelensky, at this
point, he has his millions and millions, potentially
billion. He just needs to go, okay, I'm done.
And he just needs to go away. I've done everything
I can. Let someone else come in. I went from
stand -up. All his money needs to go to the country
of Ukraine for the citizens. I went from stand
-up comedian to president during wartime. I'm
going to go away now. That's the key. Fuck him.
All right, left. I'm going to take a left turn
here. I want to go back to highlights. The magazine
highlights. Because that triggered a childhood
memory. Like the highlights magazine? Yeah. You
guys remember that? I only read them in doctor's
offices. Was that like a Boy Scout magazine?
We got that. It wasn't? I only read them in doctor's
offices. So we got that at home. And my favorite
thing about it was Goofish and Gallant. Gallant,
yes. Do you remember that? Yeah. What is going
on? Goofish and Gallant. It was a regular. It
was a regular for me, too. So it was like little
cartoons that said Gallant, Goofus, lets the
door shut behind him and doesn't open it for
the lady behind him. And Gallant stops and opens
the door and lets her. It was. These are like
dinner carnation kind of things. It was. No.
Well, I don't know. But it was basically general
values, kid values. Well, that was 1997. Life
values. Yeah, that's the stuff exactly what the
pharmaceuticals arrive at here. Show a Goofus
and Gallon example if you can find one. Because
it was awesome. Dude, they want nine bucks for
that magazine. I mean, it actually... You know
what? My feelings were a little bit different
to that because I only saw it when I was sick
at the doctor's office. That's the only time
I ever saw that, read those books. I'm thinking
of a boy's life. So my memories are, I feel like
shit as I'm reading this magazine. Really? Yeah.
Not me. We didn't get him home. The only time
I saw him was at the doctor's office. I wish
I had a little brother. I'm glad I have a little
brother. Go back to the... Okay, this is fine.
But this kind of formed my... It actually made
a difference, I think, in my upbringing. It says,
Goofus runs with scissors pointing up. Gallant
walks with the scissors pointing down. You're
being brainwashed in the doctor's office. I totally
am. No, no, no. We got these at home. It's indoctrination.
We got these at home. Goobus likes vegetables.
Gallon wants all kinds of bread and other kind
of wheat products. This wasn't like Electric
Company. Shit. Or actually, what did you say?
Whore. Oh, my God. By the way, that was so offensive.
What? Your shit? Just hearing you say whore.
As you repeat it. No, well, it's different when
I say it. Oh, there we go. All right, here we
go. Goofus coasts down the hill into the street.
Oh, he's on one of those. So that's Chevy Chase?
Yeah, he's on the Chevy Chase, what do you call
it, sled. Goofus coasts down the hill down the
street. Let's hike to Smith Hill. It's a safe
place to sled. Oh, that's what, okay. Yeah, Goofus
is sliding into the street where it's dangerous
and Gallant is saying, let's go to a hill where
it's safe. I have never. You don't know what
I'm talking about here? I've never seen Goofus
and Gallant. I remember the Highlights magazine.
It never really interested me. This formed my
childhood. I'm not lying. I loved it. I loved
it. And I loved how cool Gallant was to do the
right thing all the time. Goofus was the man,
though. Come on. No, Goofus was an asshole. Lying
down the hill into the traffic. That's fun. I
recall Boys Life and Mad Magazines. Do the bottom
one. What's it say? Why do I have to always brush
my teeth, says Goofus. Gallant keeps his teeth
clean without being reminded. That's Gallant.
Dude, I'm a rule follower. Why does Gallant wear
an eyeliner? He's not. And he has a very stylish
collared shirt on. It is very stylish. They both
have cow legs. He has the Justin Bieber haircut
working there. Yeah, he does. Where's Diddy at?
He was awesome. All right, we don't need to do
it. Okay, last one. Goofus thinks at some point
you have enough apples. So he's just grabbing
apple after apple. Gallant wants everyone to
earn as many apples as they want. What? Earn?
What does that mean? You know, there's like two
girls coming up to him. Hey, you want an apple?
Yeah. I'll show you something to blow on. See
these ladyfights. Maybe I missed some of these
gallant ones. Gavin Newsom. What does that mean?
What are you talking about? What does that mean?
Earn as many apples as they want. And it is two
girls coming up. No, it's a guy and a girl. Come
back later. I got a cherry for you. You can be
bi. What the fuck? He was wearing eyeliner. So
he was a closet fucking pornographer. He was
a pimp. He was a pimp. He was a pimp, bro. Paid
by apples. He had a stable of whores. Fucking
gallant. Come on over here. This ruins my whole
childhood. Come on, Jack and Jill. Come on. Come
over here. Who's the comedian? Jack and Jill
went up the hill. She came down with a dollar
and a quarter or whatever. Both with a buck.
Jack and Jill went up the hill. My wife hates
that. Every time I do that, it's like she's almost
like... Every time I see Andrew Dyson, I'm like,
hey, how you doing? She's like, shut up. Jack
and Jill went up the hill, both with a buck and
a quarter. Jill came down with a 250. What a
whore. Hey. Hey. Hey. Little boy blew. He needed
the money. Little Jack Horner sat in the corner
eating a pizza pie. He shit pepperoni, blew his
friend Tony White this mouth on his tie. Yeah,
his act was pretty short -lived. It was, but
it was funny. Oh, everyone freaking loved it.
When it first came out, I remember listening
to Motley Crue, Shout at the Devil, the freaking
Motley Crue. Shout at the Devil. It's Motley
Crue, and then at the same time, you got Andrew
Dice Clay. It was a little Miss Muffet sat in
a tuffet, eating her porridge away. Along came
a spider, sat down beside her, saying, Yo! What's
in the bowl, bitch? Amazing how that neural network
stays. I can't remember my fucking name, but
I can remember all that. What is the one where
the dogs, there was the old mother Hubbard, old
mother Hubbard that lived in a shoe. There was
a man Tuckett one as well, wasn't it? Yeah, I
don't remember that one. There was a little mother,
someone lived in a shoe. She had so many children,
she didn't know what to do. Look it up. Andy
Dice Clay. Something about a rover gave her a
bone of his own. I don't remember. Yes. That's
exactly what it was. He got into some kind of
trouble and he went away. Yeah, he got into some
kind of trouble, I remember. Really? Yeah. And
he disappeared for quite a while. I don't think
he ever really made a comeback. Go to Mother
Goose. He had a movie that was out. Go back.
It was his Chevy. Okay. Oh, we're going up those.
Little Miss Muffet sat on a tuffet eating her
curds in a way. Yep, that's it. You know what?
It was a sign of the times. Because right back
at that time, you had Eddie Murphy with Delirious
that came out. Or Mother Hubbard went to the
cupboard to get the dog a bone. When she bent
over, Rover took over and gave her a bone of
his own. Very nice. Okay. Memories. Yeah, memories.
All right, so he had a movie. Yeah. And it was
actually really funny. Fort Fairlane. Or Fairline.
Fort Fairlane. Fairlane. Yeah. Yes. He was a
detective or something, right? It was funny.
I don't think I ever saw it. I did. He kind of
reminds me of - My hair. My hair. The porn star.
Porn star. I forget. The dude with the - Rod
Jeremy? Yeah. He kind of reminds me of Rod Jeremy
a little bit. Rod Jeremy's a slug, man. Have
you seen what he looks like? So does - So does...
Well, and he was fat. He's dead now, but... But
he was never fat. Andy Dice Clay was... Andy
Dice... Well, whatever. He wore a leather jacket,
looked cool, and he was all like... Is he really
dead? What's his name? Ron Jeremy. Ron Jeremy's
dead? Yeah. Ford Fairlane. Well, you know, he
was such a... Like you said, he was such a slob.
Didn't take care of his stuff, you know? He was
not... Yeah, he was not an attractive guy. I
cannot believe whatever conversation we have
gone from and to ended up with... with Andy Nice
Clay, Ford Fairlane. That's amazing. That's why
this podcast is so cool. Well, sometimes. Actually,
all the time. It's always cool. And speaking
of cool, I think we were talking about... We're
going to do a countdown of some of these strangest
top tens. The 12 extremely disappointing facts
about popular music. I love it. So this is interesting.
Make sure it's 10 to 1. That doesn't matter.
They're not really ranked. The bottom one's actually
stupid, so we could skip it. So 12 extremely
disappointing facts about popular music. So this
is stuff that is popular music, and you don't
know the background of it. How does this come
about? For the record, this was posted in 2011.
2011. That's 15 years ago. I'm not a mathlete,
but that's a long time ago. Yeah, so scroll down
slowly. 30 years ago. Wow. No, not 30 years ago.
15. 15 years ago. Creed has sold more records
in the U .S. than Jimi Hendrix. That's not surprising.
Well, I mean, that has to do with sheer population.
I think some of these, you'll have that same
answer. That's the same answer for all of these.
Pretty much. All right, that's good, though.
Number two. Led Zeppelin, R .E .M., and Depeche
Mode have never had a number one single. Rihanna
has had ten. Oh, that's depressing. That can't
be true. Led Zeppelin never had one, or R .E
.M.? Well, Losing My Religion, R .E .M., that
got first. Number one? I think so. Losing my
religion? Can we fact check that in real time?
I think that, oh, well, you know what? I'm going
to fact check it right now. There you go. You
fact check that. Same with the Carpenters, Tina
Turner, and Radiohead. Radiohead, I mean, who
likes that? Oh, I know. Okay. The Carpenters
absolutely had a number one hit. Absolutely.
There's no way. There's no way. They like plaster
dicks. Wow. Actually, Losing My Religion peaked
at four. Okay, hold on. I'm looking at the Carpenters.
I stand corrected. Did the Carpenters ever have
a number one hit? This is very exciting. And
it says... This one says yes. I was going to
say, they absolutely did, not just once. It said
three. Yeah, number one is they long to be close
to you. Yeah. It kind of reminds me of wishing
I could go back to Colorado where we were watching
all the Karen Carpenter videos. Let's keep going.
See if we can debunk some of these other ones.
Yeah, let's just rifle through these. Cash's
TikTok sold more copies than any Beatles single.
Who's Kesha's? Who's that? Kesha. Kesha. She's
a singer. TikTok on the block. Oh, that's actually
a pretty fun song. I love that song, actually.
Oh. Something, something with the bottle of Jack.
Remember that? I don't know if I've ever heard
this song. Again, I think that all boils down
to. I play a little bit of it. It's an awesome
song, actually. Are we allowed to? We're going
to get flagged. By the way, she was totally take
advantage of. This is a story. She sued. She
sued and she won. Who'd she sue? The producers.
Yeah. Yeah. And somebody totally backed her.
Say whatever, girl. Oh, I do. Oh, you know this.
It's a great song. It's actually a great song.
It's a great song. Yeah, they totally took advantage
of her. And I think Taylor Swift totally backed
her. Close, close. All right, you've got to stop
it before we get flagged. Okay. That's a bit
much. So that's sold more than any Beatles single.
That is crazy. But you know what is popular?
I'm not sure I believe that. Also, does that
mean like 45s? 8 -tracks? It says any Beatles
single. Single? I don't believe it. Based on
what? It's a great conversation though. Alright,
next one. Probably like a 45. 8 Tracks. Yes,
8 Tracks. Flo Rida. What do we have about Flo
Rida? No, it just says also more than anything
about Adele or Nirvana. Feel free to roll up.
We don't care if it reveals the next one. Flo
Rida's Low has sold 8 million copies. The same
as the Beatles' Hey Jude. No, I believe that.
Demunked by population. You talked about that,
Sean. I think the population has a lot to do
with this. All right, number five. And the accessibility
to music. You got to factor that in, too. Black
Eyed Peas' I Got a Feeling is more popular than
any Elvis or Simon and Garfunkel song. I think
the word popular is misleading. Tonight's going
to be a good night. Simon and Garfunkel song.
I hated that song. You know what? It wasn't bad.
I shouldn't say I hate it. It was a fun song.
Yeah, but I used to be a disc jockey at that
time. I used to play it. You overplayed it. Oh,
it's disgusting. I played this a lot when I was
announced at the boys' football games. Mainly
Braden's. Look at you. Yeah, I played this a
lot. You announced the boys' football games?
Oh, yeah, 100%. Eleven trained men face -to -face
on the field of play. Each man a specialist,
but one man stands above the rest. He occupies
the most critical position in the game. He is
the quarterback. Would you like 13 for blah,
blah, blah. Yes. Starting for, you know, I did
that for the Centennial basketball team for two,
for multiple years. Okay. I literally was the
guy. I said, now starting for blah, blah, blah.
I was like totally. And the parents had so much
fun with it. I almost made fun of it as opposed
to, you know, and the boys loved it. And you
get fired nowadays for saying that. Well, no,
there were no Indians. We had one. So you banned
them? No, we had two, but their names were easy
to say, and they didn't start anyway. It was
Jeff and John. Anyway, it was fun. It was a lot
of fun. Oh, I loved doing it with the boys. Oh,
it was so much fun. All right, come on. Hold
on. I want to talk about Simon and Garfunkel.
Were you guys big fans? Big fans. Me too. We
had the Rosemary in Time or whatever album, the
LP. Right. We talked about this. You like Simon
and Garfunkel, and you hate America. Yes. You
can take a back seat now. With a horse with no
name. I've been to a desert on a horse with no
name. Also Sister Golden Hair. Actually, I'm
starting to like it again. Wow, keep singing.
I love it. If only. Don't they sing... Don't
they sing Ventura Highway as well? I like that
song. I like America. I think the songs are great.
Paul hates America. I don't. Paul hates America.
I don't hate America. I like America. Go Russia.
I like America. I love America. But Simon Garfunkel.
Hold on. We're going to call Chrissy Noem on
you. No, no, no. What were your favorite songs
from Simon Garfunkel? I don't have any. I like
Bridge Over Tribbled Water. I was going through
a time when my parents were splitting up. Oh.
And that song, I guess. It meant something to
me. Oh, yeah. I listened to it, and it kind of
hit me at the right spot. So that song meant
something to me. For sure. They had some deep
songs, man. Yeah. They really did. There was
another one. I like Cecilia as well. Sound of
Silence. Yes, Sound of Silence. Mrs. Robinson.
That's a catchy tune. They had great stuff. Yeah.
Mrs. Robinson was good. I also like the Scarborough
Fair. Scarborough Fair as well. Rosemary. Sean
likes that. Thyme. A hazy shade of winter. That
was them? It's thyme. The original one. Thyme.
Thyme. Would I say thyme? Yes. Did I really?
Simon and Garfunkel also has a song called America.
Did they? Tonight, country does a fee. Tonight,
sweet land of liberty. Oh, that's the wrong America.
Hold on. That was... That's Neil Diamond. Neil
Diamond. Yes, Neil Diamond. Please, can we move
forward? Yes. Jesus. Celine Dion follows... For
the love of God. Can we move on? Oh, the baby
in Nirvana in that picture wanted money. For
his penis? Yes. Some of the Deons falling into
you sold more copies than the Queen, Nirvana,
or Bruce Springsteen falling into you. I can't
even tell you how that song sounds. That's a
record. That's the whole record. That's the whole
record. Oh, is that the album? The album, yes.
The album name. I am not lying that the baby
in the Nirvana picture wanted... That's you?
No. That was you? No. It's not me. It's a naked
baby. And that baby grew up to an adult. And
he wanted money for being on that cover. Okay.
Did he win? I don't know. I doubt it. Probably
the parents signed off contract at the time and
said, you get a hundred bucks. There you go.
Go. Or maybe they just use a Getty image of a
baby and, you know. Maybe they did a chat GPT.
Nowadays, they will do AI and they won't have
to deal with that shit. I don't know, man. It
seems kind of. Pedophilia. Yeah, a little bit.
Shania Twain. I believe this one. Great album.
The same with Shania Twain's Come On Over. So
that sold more than Bruce Springsteen and all
those, right? Is that what they're saying? Bruce
Springsteen's such a hack. That's a great album,
by the way. I had the CD. Alanis Morissette's
Jagged Little Pill probably did too, right? Have
you seen her lately? Shania? Look at this picture
here. Shania Twain? Look at this picture and
go see what Shania Twain looks like today. Dude,
she's like 58. I don't care. You know what? Look
at her. I have always been confused. Right there,
the second one. Is that her? That is her. Wow.
Yeah, I've always been confused. She is like
a shape shifter. I don't understand. She has
never looked the same in any picture I've ever
seen her in. Look at the differences. Is she
like Benjamin Button and Angie Backward? Yes.
I don't know. Yeah, she's like 60 years old.
She's a shape shifter. There's a lot of girls
like that, you know? Yeah, but she's had some
work done where her eyes are all different. Her
face is different. It's a lot of Bisquick. Just
got to mix it up. Looks like babe wants over
there. Spray paint it. It's really weird. I'm
not going to lie. It's very strange. You know
what's strange? I mean, the thought process of
having to put on makeup every single day to be
a woman. It's a beat down. I'm just like, why?
Well, boy, George had to do it every day as well.
Whatever. I'm just saying, it doesn't, I mean,
it's like, why? No, he just goes to the store
as George, right? Like, you know what? Somebody
said, if you're Lenny Kravitz, you can never
appear not as Lenny Kravitz, right? Right. Like,
cool and leather jacket and all, you know, shades
and shit like that. You're nuts hanging out.
Yeah, you just can't go in, like, your pajama
bottoms out to 7 -Eleven and go get a... gallon
of milk right you have to you have to be letting
fucking crabby in character all the time honestly
that goes for every celebrity how often do they
seriously run to the to the store and they take
pictures of them and they just shred them for
being normal people well they don't have to worry
about that anymore because now they've got like
amazon food uber and all that shit just have
it all delivered that's your solution they can
never leave their home I mean, look, I get it.
At the same time, I just don't give a shit. I
don't care if I see paparazzi, not that I personally
see them, but if you got like these paparazzi.
pictures out there of these stars when they're
not done up. I don't care. I don't either. I
don't judge them, but I do feel bad. I mean,
I'll judge them if I see it, but I mean, I just
don't care. Wow, they're ugly in real life. Good
Lord. Check out that biscuit. That's just, look
at that dog face. What do they call it, a butter
face? Oh, boy. All right, number eight, Katy
Perry. holds the same record as Michael Jackson
for most number one singles from an album. So
Katy Perry, I got to tell you, she is a fallen
Christian star. She was a big time Christian
at one point. She was a Christian singer. That's
where she got her start. And she took a bite
of the apple. A little judgment maybe? You know
what? Look, good for her. You know who she's
dating now? She's dating a fucking communist
piece of shit Canadian cocksucker who's allegedly
the ballsack of a Cuban leader. Castro's kid,
yeah. Yes, that's funny. What? I didn't hear
this. Oh, yeah. There's pictures out there. They're
like, they look the same. Oh, but they were hanging
out. Total BS. Birds of a feather. All right.
Number nine. Justin Trudeau's dad and parents
were hanging around Fidel Castro a lot in the
60s. Exactly. Are you serious? It's 100 % true.
You pull up a picture of them side by side and
you're like, the curtains match the drapes. Or
the carpet match the curtains. I got you. I got
you. That's crazy. Are you going to show us a
picture of this? Oh, yeah. Look at him. Oh. I
think that one down there. In the middle? In
the middle, right there. Oh, my God. That's terrifying.
Okay, now, what are you saying? Okay, so his
mom hung out with him? His parents. The families
were like, you know. Well, Trudeau's dad was
prime minister of Canada for a while, so they
met up with world leaders, right? And one of
them being Castro, they were really close friends
with. So is this like the Arnold Schwarzenegger
with the maid? With the maid. Maria Shriver's
like, why does a kid look like the maid and not
like me? He does not look like me. Jesus. Maria
does not have a thick accent. Yes, the muscle.
That is not me. That's not me. And you look at
the kid, you're like, that's totally Schwarzenegger's
kid. There's no way about it. Look at that forehead.
What the hell? He's built like Herman Munster.
Arnold is like, he is so beautiful. He is my
child. Okay, let's move on. Gosh, number nine.
Barbara's spelled wrong. What the fuck, man?
No, that's how she spells it. No, she is not.
That's how she spells it. She has a Barbara.
Are you serious? Well, that may be how she spells
it now, but there's... I did not know that. I
didn't know that either. A Barbara. Okay, hold
on. Lower, it has B -R -A, B -R -A. It's no.
Okay, well, that's her nickname. Yeah, that's...
Thank you. Barbara Jones. It's on her birth certificate.
No, it isn't. In quotes. Prove it. Look up her
birth certificate. Just prove it. Prove it. Just
prove it. It's on Wikipedia. No. Barbara. No.
That's her nickname. Also, Madonna's on there,
too. Cher. What's Cher's name? Cher's on there
as Cher. Whatever. So what's up with this? Okay,
Barbara. This monstrosity. She kind of looks
like Beauty and the Beast. She's had some work
there, too. Oh, yeah. It looks like him. What's
it say? Has sold more records, 140 million. More
than Pearl Jam, Johnny Cash, and Tom Petty combined.
Combined. You know the thing about Barbara, I
love her voice. I really enjoyed it throughout
her career. The only thing I don't like about
her is her inability to shut the fuck up when
it comes to politics. Yeah, I know. How's that?
Come on, dude. A lot of those celebrities have
that problem. I don't care about what you think
about anybody. I want you to sing. What is the
holiday that you guys, Blair, Barbara, was stretching
down the street? We did that once. Is that Halloween?
We did it once. How is that relevant for Halloween?
I've never understood that. You know what? Jeff
had control. over the music and he blurred Evergreen
down the fucking street. That's exactly what
happened. Is that how that went down? Is that
why the families would approach your house and
then they would turn around and they walk away
from your house? Soft as an easy chair. And I
was like, what in the fuck are you doing? Andrea
heard that that year. She's like, you blasted
Barbara again? Barbara. Barbara. No second A
there. Babs. Oh, that is funny. She was extremely
juggy. She's beautiful. Beautiful. She's a beautiful
woman. She's got a beautiful voice. She really
is. It's a crying shame that she's had concerts
in the past where she just won't. I get it. She's
passionate about what she believes in, but dude,
people are there and they spend quality money
to go and see her. It's just like, come on, man.
You're ruining my experience by talking about
politics. Just don't. Do you see what Bruce Springsteen
said at his concert? No. About last week or whatever?
I want to ignore that stuff because I want to
appreciate their music and the memory I have
of growing up with these artists. Except for
Robert De Niro. Except for Robert Jr. Yeah. He's
gone. He's gone. Gone. There are a lot of butt
nuggets out there. The only one that I've kind
of moved past, and it's because he wasn't quite
the butt nugget that compared to nowadays is
Tom Cruise. Tom Cruise was - I don't mind him.
He's harmless. Now, but back then, I was kind
of like, dude, you're a douche. He's a completely
douche making fun of Brooke Shields because she
was taking medicine because postpartum depression.
And it's just like, dude, who the fuck are you
to tell anybody? Are you a doctor? I get it.
I get it. And then the way he was talking down
to the guy interviewing him from NBC News, the
guy that got kicked off, what was his name? Rose?
Charlie Rose? Is it Charlie Rose that was interviewing
him? Showed his penis to some women. Well, he
did, but I mean, but he was just like - Are you
talking about Matt Lauer? It was Matt Lauer.
I misspoke. But it's just like the audacity of
these guys that think they're the authority on
shit. Right. I mean, kind of like RFK Jr., maybe?
I don't know. Is he the authority? I mean - He's
the health secretary. He's actually in a position
of advising. No, I'm just saying he was a lawyer,
right? He's not a doctor, but now he's a health
and human services secretary. And he's talking
about the same kind of things that Tom Cruise
talks about. He's talking about MAHA stuff. Yeah,
but there's a difference. He's got a team around
him. That's true. Donald Trump or any president,
for say, is not the authority on jack shit. They're
basically taught on the fly. Anytime they're
flown into any scenario, they're kind of like,
oh, I didn't know that. Those guys, I don't know.
Let me throw out something. So I have a coworker
who refuses to watch any Tom Cruise movie. Because
he's in that cult. Scientology? That cult. Yeah,
that Scientology cult. And then they watched
the documentary about Rimi? Leah Rimini. I've
watched all those. Yes, yes. Very compelling.
Oh, yeah. Very compelling. She had a TV show
for like three or four years as well. Yes. King
of Queens. Right. So they refused to watch anything
Tom Cruise. Like no Mission Impossible. I mean,
tons of movies, right? Because he's just an evil,
evil person. And I'm like... I'm not sure I'd
buy that, right? But am I being a hypocrite by
not watching Robert De Niro in the movies because
he's such a bleeding liberal that's so caustic?
Am I being hypocritical? There's a lot to say
about Scientology, okay? There's a lot to say
about Scientology, but mostly they kind of infect
their own, right? You have to walk into Scientology
and accept it in order to be... to be a victim
of it, right? We're not victims of Scientology.
Right. But we can't watch Robert De Niro for
five seconds before he goes, fuck Trump. Yeah,
yeah, yeah. True, true. And that's a personal
thing. What are they going to do in three years
when it's over? I don't know, man. All their
shit's going to dissolve. No. I think they're
going to try to arrest his ass again. They're
going to go after every single person in his
entire administration, including Trump. They're
not going to stop until... Every single person.
They're going to undo everything. Well, they're
going to undo everything on day one. Like all
the executive orders and there's going to be
a thousand executive orders that undo everything
Trump does. We'll see what they're literally
going to like lawyer lawfare go after. No, I'm
go after hell. They might go after Levitt, the
press secretary. They're going to RFK. They're
going to go after. Trump ought to just sign a
pardon and a preemptive pardon using the, what
is it? The pen. The auto pen. Just for fucking
face to say, I'm doing this auto pen. Everybody
in my - It worked for Biden. Yeah. All right.
Part of his whole family and everything. All
right. So somehow we went from Barbra Streisand
to a massive - Miley Cyrus. Here we go. Number
10. People actually bought Miley Cyrus - No,
Billy Ray Cyrus. Billy Ray Cyrus album. Some
gave all dot, dot, dot. 20 million people more
than any Bob Marley album. This is horribly written.
Yeah. Do you know how Bob Marley died? It was
toe fungus. Yeah, it was like dang green. Yes,
he had a toe, like a very treatable toe cancer
or something. Isn't that horrible? Yeah, well.
Anyway. You think he was too stoned? I don't
know. I think he just kind of. It'll get better.
It'll get better. We're all kind of like that.
We're stubborn males to some degree. That doesn't
look like a good spot on your back. Oh, it's
fine. It's fine. I mean, are we like that? Probably
not to the big toe degree. Yeah, that is crazy,
and it's a shame. Look, there's a lot of stuff
that he had to do to get to the level of fame.
He was a genius from a reggae. I wouldn't call
him a genius. Well, no. Genre -breaking, barrier
-breaking dude. Huge genius. Ganja, the whole
marijuana -smoking thing. I mean, it was a lifestyle.
And they produced a very proprietary music. What
is that? Reggae. I mean, that's its own thing.
And it's, yeah, whatever. I think it's kind of
sloppy. I think it's fun music. I think it's
good party music. thing that they got going on
is very sloppy and very, I don't know, it's not
for me. Yeah. But I did enjoy a lot of Bob Marley
songs, so kind of a hypocrite, you know? I mean,
Buffalo Soldier, you know, No Woman, No Cry,
that's a great freaking song, and the message
that it sends is beautiful. What about I Shot
the Sheriff? I Shot the Sheriff. Buffalo Stance?
Buffalo Stance. No, that's... Hold on. If I hadn't
been drinking, I could be able to tell you who
that was. Nina Cherry? Motherfucker. Here we
go again. Jeff strikes again. Oh, Nina Cherry.
That's a great song, by the way. What, Buffalo
Stance? Yeah, bring that up. Buffalo Stance?
Bring that up. Oh, please don't. Please do. It's
a great song. This is painful. That was back
when I was in college. Yes. I was probably, I
don't know, senior in college, maybe? There she
is. Nina Cherry. I don't even remember how that
goes. I used to play that song every night. Okay,
there we go. It was one of those songs, but I
could DJ in and out of it several times. Keep
going. Go to the refrain. There we go. What is
she doing these days? She's looking at Walmart.
She might be. I mean, a lot of these successful
artists in the 70s, 80s, you know, they didn't
manage their money very well. Well, that, plus
they were probably taken advantage of, and they
probably are working out. I mean, look at what
is... The black artist that does a lot of the
dancing. MC Hammer. MC Hammer. He went bankrupt
multiple times. It's because these guys are so
stupid. It's like I have to have my entourage.
It's just like they're so mentally incompetent
that they have to have this entourage. Isn't
Vanilla Ice the same way? Oh, yeah. He went through
all his money. He's now in construction down
in Florida. Yeah. And actually doing pretty well.
He has a TV show on like HGTV. I also thought
he was like a motorcycle racer. Oh, I don't know.
I don't know. BMX racer. I know he has like a
home improvement show. This may be the longest
top 10 we've ever done. All right. What are we
on? Actually, not top 10. Top 15. Number 11.
Cast of Glee has more songs chart than the Beatles.
Come on. That's not true. That cannot be true.
All right. No, don't fact check it. Let's move
on. You don't want to believe that. It's absolutely
not possible. 75 versus 71. There you go. There
you go. Well, you know what? That's unbelievable.
I've seen Glee a few shows, and it is kind of
fun, but it's got old extremely quick, and I
never watched it again. Yeah, we gave up after,
I think, year three. Is it basically like Grease
Lightning? No, they were good. It was like these
mashups. What am I thinking of? Not Grease Lightning?
Yeah, it was a mashup. That's a good way to put
it. Grease. Thank you. You were almost there.
No, I got half the credit. All right, so number
12 says this guy exists. Yeah, that was stupid.
Justin Bieber. The Biebs. Poor dude. By the way,
he's got a really hot wife. Yeah, but have you
seen him? He looks like a meth head. Does he
really? Oh, yeah. He doesn't look good. That's
too bad. Yeah, but he's found God. Yeah, no,
he's a big time. Look, he's dealt a short. I
mean, P .D. What is his fucking name? P. Diddy.
Dude, he really did a number on him. Have you
watched that documentary yet? No. I won't watch
it. It makes me sad watching shit like that.
I know. All right, so we have nine minutes. Whoa.
All right, well, let's talk. I think this proposal
has gotten to you. Look, here's what happened.
Chuck decided. Yep. By himself. Hey, look, we're
going to go to South Texas, and we're going to
go fishing, and we're going to go hit a few distilleries.
Right. And in one of the distilleries in South
of San Antonio, North of San Antonio, he decided
he was going to, hey, let's go check out Rebecca
Creek. He checked out Rebecca Creek. Shout out
to Rebecca Creek. Yep. You know, with the double
barrel Spanish oak. We love it, love it, love
it. Everything else is less than that. He comes
back with almost a hazmat, barrel strength, 137
.4 proof, single barrel. Distiller's collection.
Distiller's collection. I got to tell you, I
am not wowed by this. Fair. I'm not kicking it
out of bed. I thoroughly enjoyed it. It is not
the Garrison Brothers cowboy. No. But this has,
it has, the very first pull off of it, and you
said it out loud, very oily, very leather -ly,
whatever that is. Leather -ly. Tea, it's got,
it took a while for it to open up. Yeah. And
now that it's open, I'm liking it more and more.
And I know you guys always mock me when it comes
to the - Did you really? No, I didn't. He do
another pour? I'm sure he did. Okay, hold on.
You're empty. I'm empty. And you... Bitch, please.
Hold on. There's no way your glass is full and
ours are empty without some explanation. Stop,
stop, stop. Listen. Jeff went downstairs and
grabbed some chocolate. I know. I've been eating
the chocolate. Well, there's still some here.
What's your point? Eat some. My point is we were
eating some of the chocolate with it because
I was going to recommend to our listeners if
you got a drink like this, then you might want
to dump some chocolate or some other kind of
influential flavors in there to pound it up.
How does this explain how he has a full glass
and we don't? Because I've been talking a lot,
I guess. That's the weakest explanation ever.
Are you really? Yes. Yes. That was very good.
I thought it was good. Jeff poured mine extra.
I didn't pour anything in mine. I agree that
the first pool or two were not quite there. I
think I made the comment, I think Paul also,
that there's kind of some bitterness on the finish,
right? But the last few drinks that I had, I
was picking up a ton of brown sugar. I don't
know if that's influence from the chocolate that
I was eating, but I was picking up a ton of brown
sugar. A lot. That's actually spot on. I wouldn't
even say caramelly. I would say brown sugar is
actually perfect. Hits it. A little honey on
the tail end of it. I say if you get this, if
you find one of these, I think it's a distiller
only, right? Yes, I believe so. It's really hard
to find. If you're able to get this down at the
distillery, get it, pour it to Glencairn or whatever
you drink it out of and let it sit for about
half an hour. It's not for the faint of heart.
Yeah, and let it sit. It's got some power, guys.
And it needs to open up, needs to breathe a little
bit for some of the flavors to come out of it.
Once you get there. It's distilled from grain.
It's 60 % corn, 36 % rye, and malted barley,
4%. That's a pretty high rye. 4 % rye. That's
what I'm getting a lot of rye spice. Damn, that's
a lot of rye. 36%. I misspoke again. It's 36
% rye. Oh, okay. That's a lot. Yeah, it is. And
the fact that, well, it's a lot because the corn
isn't as much. The corn is typically higher than
78, 75, you know? Absolutely. So the fact that
it's 60 % says a lot, and it contributes to a
lot of that brown sugar stuff. So is this their
own juice, or is this sourced again? Do we know?
They make their own juice. So they make everything
now. They didn't used to, but They do now, right?
They do now, but I don't think this is part of
their own juice because this is an eight -year
batch. So this is part of the original MGP stuff
that they used to have. MGP. Could be. Could
be. But still, it's great. This is the same juice
that they put in the double -barrel Spanish oak.
The only difference is it wasn't put in the double
-barrel Spanish oak. It was put in a regular
oak. Right. They were trying to save money is
basically what the story is. No, they ran out
of the barrels. They were allocated Spanish oak
barrels and put it in the Spanish oak barrels
and created that Spanish oak double barrels.
And then they quit ordering more because it was
a mistake that they got them in the first place.
And the irony is it was a home run. And they're
trying to recreate that now. So we'll see what
they come out with. You know, time will tell
because they got to take a while to produce it.
So they let it age and then they're like, oh
shit, this is really good. Now we have to do
it again. Yeah. And now you're talking about
another five plus years. How many years was it?
I think it was a four, wasn't it? Was it four?
Okay, maybe. I went on their Facebook and Instagram
and ridiculed. Hold on. Let me rephrase that.
Harass? Harass is a better word. Okay. Because
what I put on there was bring back the double
barrel Spanish oaks. They get a lot of feedback
like that. Stop messing around. And I copied
and pasted that. And I'm not exaggerating. I
put it on 100 posts. 100 posts. Over and over
and over again? I went down Facebook and I started
at the top. Comment, bam. Comment, bam. Comment,
bam. You can no longer comment on this one. Oh,
okay. Well, I guess I went over to Instagram.
Comment, bam. Comment, bam. You've been banned.
No, I'm joking. They didn't say that. Wow. Hey,
look, because I was... So, was there a demand
for it? I don't know. So, he's like... Sean demanded
it. He's like a bourbon agitator. Yeah, he's
an agitator. Yeah, you're an agitator. What?
You know what? For a good reason. Were you paid
for that? Were you a paid agitator? Dude, I had
my whistle. I brought my signs. Damn. And your
camera. Did you dye your hair blue? Golly. That's
hardcore. Coexist sticker on your Subaru? Good.
That is bizarre. Well, I'm glad you did because
apparently they heard the message and they're
doing it again. We'll see what happens. No, didn't
you say? Chuck, did you say? No, it's definitely
for sure going to come out. It's coming back.
But we don't know how the dynamic's going to
be. It's probably going to be 100 proof, 110
proof. No, no, no. I bet you they go right back
to what they created the first time. I hope so.
We'll see. Hopefully it's as good because the
juices are going to be exactly the same. It never
is. Well, I mean, they make their own juice,
so it definitely won't be. Yeah, they make their
own now. Before, it was MGP. It may suck now.
MGP. It could be better. It could be worse. MGP's
solid. I know it is. I mean, look. It was a horrible
thing for us to say, and I got to admit, I was
wrong about MGP, multigrain products. Multigrain
products, the company that produces the stuff
for these guys, that's solid juice. You have
to remember that MGP doesn't mean just like one
juice. They have the diversity they have. They
age at 10 years. They age at 8 years. They age
at 6 years. They age at 5 years. It's a bunch
of different mash bills, too. Hundreds of different
mash bills. A bunch of different grains. They're
doing it all. So you can't even compare one MGP
to another MGP. You have to keep that in mind.
Well, I think some of the issue I have is these
companies should call out. Because they're non
-distilling producers. If they're owned or not.
Correct. You have to hunt for it. You have to
look on the back and go, it's distilled in Indiana,
it's distilled in Kentucky, or wherever, and
we're in Texas. They shouldn't be afraid to disclose
that information. All right, boys, let's rate
this. Oh. Oh. Let's go out and get some powerhouses.
At this proof. At 137 -point proof. It's over
135, so it definitely puts it. It's not hazmat,
but God bless it. It puts it in the same category.
I would, too. I would put it in the same category.
I'll go first. I'm going to put this at a 7 .8.
I'm going to go 6 .9. Did you shit yourself?
I did fart. God. Did you really while you were
saying that? No, I farted about 45 seconds ago.
Oh, yeah. No, I'm getting it, too. Oh. So I said...
We're going to have to finish this with muffled
voices. It's influenced my entire palate. Yeah.
This is a 2 at this point. This is a 1 .3. Yes.
Whatever. And Rebecca Creek, it's not your fault.
It's only mildly muddled. Oh, my God. All right.
I said a 6 .9. I made a 7 on this. Good stuff.
Why do you have to pollute us? Are you kidding
me? Like, you don't do it? I have never farted
in the podcast room. You're the only one. I am.
You better be smited, both of you, you shitsters.
The question, would we buy this again? How much
was it, Chuck? $130. Oh, damn. For $130, would
we buy this again? I would. Woo, that's harsh.
I would. I would because if it's distillery only
and, you know, you got to love that kind of stuff.
I will if it's in a Spanish oak barrel. God.
No. Oh, come on. I bought one for myself. It's
making its rounds. It's wafting over here, too.
I use a tiny... For the love of God, can we end
the podcast? Can we get out of here? All right.
It's the second half of Dudes Like Us podcast.
Tuesday, January 27th, 2026. Check us out on
YouTube, TikTok, Facebook, and Instagram. Find
us out there. Thank you, Mr. Producer, staying
on top of shit. Shout out to Rebecca Creek, Dudes
Like Us. I'm Sean. I'm nauseous. You took way
too long. I'm Jeff. God.