The Friday night podcast. I didn't have my headset
on. Yeah, you're not ready. It was so fast. I
was trying to cut your hand. Yeah, he couldn't
even open the beer. He needed the man to open
it for him. What is going on? You've fallen to
new lows, Sean. New lows. When a man can't open
his own beer, did he hand it to you, Jeff? Yep.
I just stuck it in my belly button. Nice. Yes.
Oh, my God. See, that's ripped ass. I see some
lint in here. He's got serious. Yes. Serious
six -pack or one -pack or what do you call it?
It's just one big blob. All right. For our listeners
out there, obviously, this is the second half
of the Dudes Like Us podcast for August 22nd.
Yes. Hey, man, if you guys want to check us out
on Facebook or Instagram, we're there, right?
We are. I'm not an Instagram guy, but apparently...
I'm sorry, what? I'm not an Instagram guy. I
had a minor seizure. Yes, we are on Instagram.
We're on dudeslikeus -podcast. We also have a
dudeslikeus -woodcraft if you're interested in
some of the swag that we can make. We've got
some cool stuff. Jeff has become quite the wood
stylist down there with our CNC machine from
Onefinity. Is that what it is? Is it Onefinity?
It's Onefinity, yes. Onefinity. So we've got
a Onefinity machine that does all kinds of cool
things, lasering and engraving. I need to do
some stuff. I've started back up work, so I haven't
been able to focus on anything down there, but
I need to make some more magnets. I know you
want some business cards as well. Yeah, I do,
but you know what? You just got to make a list.
You got to make a little checklist, a little
to -do list. I'm back on Paul again with his
magic to -do list. I'm a huge proponent for that.
Lists are the way to roll, guys. I did make another
1845 Texas for us. Oh, okay. I don't know, 24
or 18 by 20 or something like that. So it's decent.
We just need to frame it. Now that we're starting
some video, we're going to have to decorate the
left and the right side. We're going to need
some symmetry back there. By the way, we need
some of our own swag. Thank you, Mr. Chuck, our
producer for taking care of shit all the time
for our Dudes Like Us podcast. I'm Sean. I'm
Paul. And I'm Jeff. We have a jam -packed fun
second half. First half was a little serious.
Yes, we're very serious people. Yeah, you know,
we're talking a little politics. We're talking
about policy. We're talking about things going
on. Did we even talk about John Bolton? No, we
did not. Holy shit. I don't want to dive too
much into John Bolton, but it did happen. A little
butt slap today. It's kind of nefarious things
going on. Well, he's kind of an asshole. He's
a total asshole. He's a sleazeball based on what
Trump was saying, but I'll touch just this little
bit, and then you guys can run with anything
you want, but it might... From what I understood,
they were initially saying that there was some
papers that he had that were confidential that
he shouldn't have. But other sources have said,
well, there's some other stuff going on that
is far worse. About Bolton? About Bolton that
has nothing to do with the papers. Well, he had
top secret clearance until a couple weeks ago.
He just got it revoked. So who knows if he had
access to anything? I will tell you this. Of
all the things that are happening, the optics.
Yes. Thank you. Paul said we have to be. Emotive.
Jesus. When we do video, you're going to see
a lot of this. All right. Anyway. Wow. I pulled
something. I know I did. I heard a pop. My shoulder
dislocated. I look like a little bear dancing.
I didn't know I was gone. You need to get 911.
I would put those guys to shame, I guess. All
right. Anyway. A little magic, Mike. Yeah. The
thing is, there's a lot of things that are happening
right now that don't look good optically, right?
Because it looks like revenge. And that's true.
It does. I mean, yeah, because Bolton was a Trump
hater. And suddenly now, you know, he gets raided.
And then this is happening. And then the Letitia
James, right? Now they reversed the thing for.
The half a billion dollar. Exactly. All these
things that were like when Biden was in office.
Well, because a lot of those things were illegal.
Yes. Or incorrect, and they're kind of fixing
some things. Yeah, they're just righting the
wrongs. I agree, but from the left's perspective,
this is a huge... See, I told you so. Yep. This
is all retribution, and that's why Biden did
his bullshit proactive pardons. Pardons, yeah.
Because he knew what was coming. What about Shifty
Schiff? I know. He's in a shitload of trouble.
Yeah, and that looks like another retaliation
type thing. Leticia James. It just doesn't look
good. I know it's all legit. It doesn't look
good. I don't care. I don't care either. I mean,
this really, look, they shouldn't be doing it.
I know they've been doing it forever, but they
shouldn't be doing it. It's wrong. I think people
should just stop with the madness. Well, I learned
a new term. Writing it wrong. I learned a new
term last year or the year before, whenever it
came out, was lawfare. Yes. I guess maybe I've
heard it before, but I never understood it. But
basically, it's warfare. Using the law. Yep.
And that's what the Dems were doing. They were
just throwing everything against the wall to
get Trump in trouble to see what would stick.
And not just Trump. Any, you know. True. Adversarial,
like, what do you call it? Not competitor, but
whoever they want to get out of the way. Accomplice.
Yes. Whoever they want to get out of the way.
Whatever happened to the whole Georgia thing
where the DA was sleeping with the lawyer. Fannie.
Fannie. Whatever happened with that, did that
thing just go away? Sounds like it. I know she
got yanked off. I haven't heard anything about
it. That's just it. There's a long list of unaccountability.
You know, these people that are doing wrong,
and they're throwing stones and slandering, and
then it just disappears. Oh, it's okay. You just
caused me to have to listen to something for
the last nine months. And then poof. And now
it's gone. Okay, so what happened? Okay, well,
okay, so they just dismissed it. Okay, so we're
just going to let it go? You did all that? It's
kind of like the laptop, and I hate bringing
it up. We weren't going to talk about the politics,
but it's, you know, look. We're going to talk
about John Bolton. That was the spirit of this.
I was going to say that, and it does look bad,
the optics of it. Way to go, Sean. You drug us
right back into politics. It was the optics of
it, but like on the five today, Jesse, he had
mentioned that His contacts have said that there's
something else going on, and it has nothing to
do with confidential papers that he has. What
could that mean? It means that he's got some
bullshit going on. I don't know. Money? Did he?
No, he's insinuating. Mineral oil? No, he's insinuating.
I knew it. It's mineral oil. Say it the way you
say it. It has to do with money. With money?
With money. It has to do with mustache rides.
Yeah, he does have a good mustache. Is he counterfeiting?
Is he a counterfeiter? I don't know. No one knows,
really. So we'll just have to wait and find out.
He is a douchebag, though. Yeah. I mean, when
Trump was saying that, you know, when he would
go out to some of these meetings out in other
countries, and the other country presidents would
be like, ambassadors would be like, we don't
want to work with this guy. He's an asshole.
Oh, Bolton. Because Bolton was like trying to
start wars everywhere. You know, you got to figure
out, I mean, that was what was insinuated. They're
like, we don't like what these guys are doing.
Well, you should bomb them. Just attack them.
Do whatever you can to annihilate them. But Trump
doesn't want us to. You know what? Fuck Trump.
Was he part of the military complex? Look at
my mustache. Maybe he was making a lot of money
off of the military industry to where, As the
wars raged, he made money, maybe. Maybe. I'm
sure he did, just like Fauci. He was like, look
at my mustache. You don't want peace. You want
war. These are not the droids you're looking
for. Good Lord. So, Jeff, you had said a text
earlier this week of cities in the United States
that you just, you don't. We're going to kind
of rifle off some of these because you're kind
of like, I can't believe these are actual cities.
And I'll dumb down, even without even looking
at this, let's go over some that are occurring
in Texas. Well, real quick, the map is the most
lewd -sounding town names in each state. Yeah,
so they pick the most one for each state. There's
going to be 50 of them. So there's 50, and some
of these are pretty interesting. Yeah, they are.
So let's go round robin. We'll pick a state and
we'll say what it is. Round Robin. What did you
say? Round Robin. What does that mean? Round
the horn. I've never heard that phrase ever.
You know what? The last time I said Round Robin,
you said the same thing. Round Robin. Was I drunk
when I said it? I'm guessing you were. Round
Robin. The World Cup is Round Robin. All right.
So, Jeff, go first. Pick a state. Go. I want
to pick Wisconsin. Wisconsin. All right. What's
that one? Spread Eagle. Oh, I know somebody that
lives in Spread Eagle. Is that like a liquor?
Spread Eagle is when you're, you know, it's like
beaving it, you know. No. That's when the cops
are going, hey, Spread Eagle. Yeah, you spread
your legs and your vag is hanging out. Now, that's
kind of like what they did on a music video from
the 80s. What was the, here I go again, white
snake on my own. And he had that girl in the
red Corvette. What's her name? Tara. Tara. Tara.
Tawny Katane. Tawny. Tawny. It's not Tawny. It's
Tawny. No. Here we go. Don't contest, Jeff. Look
at him. Yeah, who am I? Look, when Jeff says
no and he has the head bobble compounded with
that. I'm going toe -to -toe with Tawny. Yeah,
there you go. That's not the same lady. Yes,
it is. Tani Katanga. Look at her now. She's dead
now. Oh, my God. Oh, now I feel horrible. Wow,
that's not her. That's not her, but man. She
had those gums. That is an advertisement. She
had a lot of work done. All right, go back to
the States. She died like four years ago. Oh,
my God. Anyway, so Spread Eagle. Spread Eagle.
I'm next. I'm going to do Oregon. Oregon is wanker's
corner. That's the name of a city. Wanker's Corner.
A town. Just in the corner. Okay, well, is this
a town or is this a city? It's a town. It's a
town. It's a sounding town. Or is it a village?
You know what? This is also going to be a good
geography test because you have to know which
state it is because they're not listed. Interesting.
Go ahead, Sean. What's yours? I'm going to go
with Pennsylvania with intercourse. I actually
have heard of that one before. I have too. Pennsylvania,
intercourse. All right, Jeff, back to you. Are
we going to do the producer? Yeah. I'm sorry.
Go ahead. Dude, give me Massachusetts. Ooh. Where
is that? Felchville. Felchville. Oh, God. Oh,
that's gross. Do our listeners know what Felch
is? I don't even know what Felch is. Yes, you
do. You know Mung? You know Mung and Felch? How
do I remember this? I wanted Jeff to define it.
Am I right about this? Mung and Felch? All right.
So the most lewd sounding town names in each
state. Felchville is actually a town in Massachusetts.
All right. Back to Jeff. Go. I want to go with,
I think, South Carolina. Sugar tit. Sugar tit.
Nice. Sugar tit. Girls like it when you call
them that. They do. Imagine saying, so where
do you live? I live in sugar tit. Sugar tit.
There's all kinds. I mean, look, there's a whole
thing. Just think about that. All right, I'm
going with Missouri. Cooter. Cooter. That is
Missouri. That's Missouri, right? Hang on. That's
the nickname of half the people in the South,
though. Come on. Wasn't he the mechanic at Dukes
of Hazzard? He's the mechanic at Dukes, yeah.
At Dukes of Hazzard and the cars, the movies
from Disney. I get it. All right, we'll do one
more round. Go ahead. Go, Sean. Well, I mean,
hmm. Let me see. Why don't you do Hawaii? Go
ahead. Hawaii? Good luck. Okay, I'm going to
do Hawaii. That's lots of vowels. It's a lot
of vowels. Hana, Hana, Na Poo Poo. Hana. I don't
even know how you say that. Hana Unao. Hanao,
Hanao, Papua. Why don't you copy that and say,
how do you pronounce this? Yes. Yes, do that.
I can't. Do that. Hanao, Nao, Na Poo Poo. And
we'll go back to that. Yes. All right. Well,
there's quite a few really good ones on here.
There are. What is Illinois? Is it Dick up there?
Is that Dick? That's Michigan. That's Michigan?
Michigan's Dick. Illinois is Booty. Booty. Yeah.
I've actually been to one of these cities. Probably
Balltown. How about Idaho? Probably Blue Ball.
How about Idaho? Dick Shooter. Dick Shooter's
a good one. Yeah. Have you been to Beaver City?
Beaver City. Where's that at? Well, look at California.
What kind of city is that? Rough and ready. Is
that Nebraska? Yeah. That's Nebraska. Look at
me. I knew where Nebraska was. Very nice. So
the one I've been to is in Kentucky. Wait, wait.
You haven't been to PP Township? No, I've never
been to PP Township. Oh, God. I've been to Big
Bone. Big Bone. Big Bone, Sweet Lips, Ball Play,
Splunge, Butts, Dry Pong, Muskogee. Oh, wait.
Sean's just got Tourette's all of a sudden. Yeah.
I mean, this is incredible. I mean, you got Wood
Socket, Wound Socket. Oh, look at Keister. Blue
Ball Village. That's Jeff's favorite word. It
is. He says it all the time. No, you do. No,
well, I mean. That's a Sean thing. Yeah, but
Jeff taught me that. Wound Socket. Hooker. God.
Butternut. Where are you from? Well, you already
said Wanker's Corner, right? Right. What is Washington?
Hump Tulips? Hump Tulips. I don't understand
Alaska. Someone may have to explain that one
to me. Mary's Igloo? Dick Shooter. Is Igloo a
slang for vagina? I think Mary's Igloo used to
be probably some sort of a trade. Igloo, I guess
people would show up and they would make... Igloo
is what they ask about. Yeah, I've got some stuff
for sale and it became a popular little area
and they were like, hey, it's going to call it
Mary's Igloo. Or maybe it's a red light district.
I don't know. I'm just trying to imagine the
locals, right? They're like, so where do I go
to get this done? Okay, well, you go past Wanker's
Corner and about 30 miles outside of that, you're
going to get to Hump Tulips. And then take a
left and then Dick's Shooter, right there at
Dick's Shooter at Corner Town. I mean, really?
And if you get the ball play, you've gone too
far. Yeah. If you miss ball play, you'll end
up right up in the butts. Don't overshoot the
ball play. You'll wind up in the butts. Where'd
you find this? This is great. I love it. This
is, I don't know. It's stately .com, stately
blog. Okay, that's good. I don't know, I just
Googled it. Yeah, we got to do more of that later.
Butternuts. I like it. Butternuts, New York.
I like it. Sweet lips. All right, so, you know,
one thing that we didn't, we brought up a little
bit, but, you know, walk us through, give us
the, like, the two -minute version of your excursion,
Mr. Producer. Oh, me and my favorite place on
Earth, Destin, Florida. It's not Miccosucky?
No, it's not Miccosucky. Miccosucky? Is that
right outside of Miccosucky? Or is it by dry
prong? It's closer to Splunge. And ball play.
And ball play. These are real town names. Actually,
the closest is actually ball play. Every state.
So they have the map of the United States. It's
in the taint of ball play. So if anybody doesn't
know where Destin is, it's in the, it's not in
the armpits. It's in the panhandle. It's in the
panhandle of Florida. It's about three counties
into Florida, right? Right. Right across the
border. Yeah. Yeah. Just go past Floribama line
or whatever. It's a couple hundred miles from
Orange Beach. Orange Beach. Yeah. Maybe an hour,
hour and a half. All right. So you. It goes to
Pensacola and then. So you and a bunch of buddies
rented a condo on the beach. Yeah, a bunch of
them. Yeah, right across the street from me.
You and your fellow musicians. Did you do a circle
stare? I don't know what that means. Yeah, you
do. It's where people are staring at each other.
And saying nothing. Paul wants to do a circle
stare. But looking at each other fondlingly.
Nude. Fondlingly. Jesus, this is the second half.
Actually, we kind of do that during this podcast,
don't we? We kind of do. You've been there for
a week, Chuck. Walk us through this. We go and
we jam as a band. We go fishing. But you're on
vacation and you were talking to me about some
of the expenses. It kind of tripped me out. And
that's one of the reasons I want to bring this
up because Because, you know, vacations and cost,
the shit money costs. It's expensive. It's expensive.
And one thing he brought up was just kind of
like, what the fuck, man? He was like, you know
what? To have a service for the week that he
was there, to have an umbrella and a set amount
of chairs down there, was like 500 bucks for
the week. Yeah. Yep. For that. Yeah. Yeah. And
I'm like. And did you even sit under the umbrella
that week? Oh, yeah. Okay. Well, then there you
go. It was worth it. That's why you got that
nice bikini tan line. But don't you? Yeah. Nice.
It was the bronzing, the bronzing umbrella. Actually,
he doesn't have tan lines. Yeah, we split it
three ways. Oh, three? Yeah, well, you know.
Now it's like a little umbrella, like a little
thing where you're all crammed underneath. It's
a big blue umbrella. It's probably 10 feet around.
Wow, that's a big diameter. And then you throw
a couple lounge chairs. How do they fasten the
umbrella to the - Just stick it right into a
hole. Oh, so there's a hole there? Yeah. Is it
like a concrete hole? They actually have a drill
with a little auger on it, and they just zip,
and then just stick it right in there. Very nice.
And it stays. Even if it's windy, it stays. It's
crazy. But you sent a video of you guys all jamming
out and playing ACDC, or was it ACDC? Oh, we
played everything. It was the Beastie Boys. Beastie
Boys, yeah. Beastie Boys. And there was like
eight of you, I thought. There's a lot of us,
yeah. Everybody there is a musician, so they
all want to play. So I guess you mentioned multiple
umbrellas. I don't know. Oh, yeah. We had like
15 umbrellas together. So 15 times 500. They
made a lot of money, though. They made a lot
of money. Actually, I think there was probably
eight umbrellas, 15 chairs. I think that's how
it went. So that company made about six grand
off you guys. You might as well just freaking
get a circus tent. On a fucking umbrella. Just
for the umbrellas. You could have had a circus
tent out there. Could have. Why are we not doing
this? They do not allow tents. You could have
set up an entire wedding. I mean, there's a little
venue out there. You could probably buy an umbrella
cheaper than that. Just leave it there. Yeah.
And I got to show you guys the videos of, we
went to Rum Runners, which is a piano bar, and
we just took over the place. Nice. We're like,
you guys, yeah, you're great. Just move over.
We're going to play a little while and sing and
all that kind of crap. What does that mean? You
got on stage? Yeah, yeah, yeah. With your guitars?
Yeah. Keith, Adam. Shelly, they all played. And
the owners just kind of said, hey, have some
fun. Have some fun. Yeah. We're here for fun.
They let you do it. And everybody left. If you
break it, you buy it. Like all the people that
were there left. I guess. No, they're great,
man. They're all pro musicians that play in local
bands that play in North Austin. And they're
all fantastic. I love them. You were in heaven.
Yeah. Jamming with these guys. It's a week of
just jamming with the... The people you like,
oh, no, watch the play. If we went to go to the
Revel and saw those guys, and then we hung out
with those guys for a week. That's super cool,
man. Yeah. Well, very nice. And you had a ball.
Had a ball. We had a raging boner the entire
time. Fantastic. You know he did. Whiskey. No
whiskey dick. No whiskey dick. Did you eat vomiting?
So you show vomiting. There was some vomiting.
Really? I knew it. Was that on the boat? I knew
it. On the boat. The boat was a little rough.
He chummed. Yeah, we chummed the water a little
bit. Chummed the water, yeah. But to give them
a little context, you went out fishing. Fishing,
yeah, deep sea fishing. Yeah, we caught probably
eight. I caught eight vermilion, which are kind
of like a red snapper knockoff. Snapper. Yeah.
So you guys had some fresh fish for dinner? Yeah,
we did. Yep. Did you grill it? You grill it outside?
What did you do? No, Keith is a kind of a, he's
an executive chef, and he actually baked it with
some good. Garlic and butter. Saffron and rosemary.
We had saffron rice. One of my friends is an
executive chef. He's also the bassist. One of
my friends is an offshore fishing guy. I know
someone with an airplane. I'm going to fly down
there. I hear a lot of jealousy. It's more envious.
But listen, we're happy that you had a good time.
I'm excited. There's maybe an opportunity for
us to maybe join you next time. I don't know.
It's the best beach in America. That'd be cool.
What about a little karaoke option? Yeah, well,
we do. But they play their own music. We did
that last year. When the band couldn't play,
we did karaoke. So, yeah. I'm just thinking,
you know, I could bring a laptop that has some
karaoke stuff. We could look up to a pre -existing
sound system. Yeah, Mike didn't go this year.
He didn't bring the laptop with the karaoke.
But if he, yeah, that's perfect. Yeah. It sets
up well in the house and people love it. They
come up. Oh, everybody loves karaoke. Yeah. Especially
after like six beers. That's it. That's the key.
It really is the key. You know, because you don't
even care what you sound like. Did you find any
good bourbons down there? You know, so we went
to Total Wine. They just opened a new Total Wine,
and they had buffalo trays for $25. Yeah. So
I bought two. Nice. And then I found a 1792 foolproof.
It was $50. It was the normal price. I didn't
find anything special at that Total Wine, but
I went to this place called Beauchamp's, and
they had the list, right? Yeah, but their pricing
was ridiculous. Oh, my God. Their pricing was
ridiculous. They knew what they had. They knew
what they had. Yeah. And what do they have? What's
it called? The OFC. The OFC. Yeah. The OFC was
$500 a shot. Pass. Shot. Big pass. Yeah. Big
pass. But they sold half. Unless somebody else
buys it. But they're reasonable. They'll sell
you a half shot for $250. Oh, that's a hell of
a deal. Such a great deal. Right. Like, if you're
only half celebrating. winning the lottery or
whatever. You just won a mini lottery. Yeah,
but you bought a bottle. So you bought the two
Buffalo Trace, and you got the foolproof, but
you got another one, the Riff. Oh, the Riff.
Yeah, new Riff. Single barrel. Yeah, because
coincidentally, we did the sampling of the new
Riff. Just the week before I left. And it was
the same bottle. No, ours was a single barrel.
Yours was something else. It was a single barrel
as well. But different single barrels. Oh, it
was a different single barrel, yeah. A different
barrel, but the same. Yeah, it was kind of funny.
I was like, I know this one. Yes, pour. That's
good. And then they had the musician down there
from Still Austin. So did you digest all four
of those bottles while you were there? No, actually,
Greg took some home. So when I go visit Greg,
I got some. The riff? Yep. No, the riff was Keith's.
He brought that. Yeah, but my point is you picked
up two Buffalo Trace and a full proof. Did you
consume those? I consumed one Buffalo Trace and
half of the other two. Okay. Yeah. That's a good
tearing. Not bad for seven to eight days worth
of work. Right. Tore into it pretty good. And
then they also had the gentleman, they had a
Jack Daniels Sinatra. Oh, yeah. How was that?
It was pretty good. So I'm going to ask you,
as far as it goes on vacations and just everyday
stuff, I have a very difficult time drinking
during days, period. Any day. Let's say it's
a Saturday. I'm not a huge fan of drinking on
a Saturday morning. I'm not, period. I mean,
I have. What did we do when we were at Tahoe?
Weren't we drinking that bullet like all day?
I don't know. You started at 5 a .m. I don't
remember. We'd sit out there in the back with
the hammock. And just drink all day. I think
we drank. Kind of like Pottsboro. We drank all
day. Yeah, but you're missing the point. It's
not something like when you go on vacation. He's
like, I don't do it, but I do it. Actually, I
don't remember doing that. Yeah, we had a whole
handle of bullets. That's the key. You don't
remember. That's probably why I woke up with
such issues. Could be. Sleep apnea. Dude, I woke
up in the middle of the night in Lake Tahoe.
Scratches all over your back. Dude, I thought
I was going to die. I had regurgitated in my
mouth. Oh, that's not cool. It was a little bit,
but I was suffocating. That's not good. And I
was in the middle of sleep. I get up in a panic,
and I'm gasping for air. And there's like shit
flying out of your mouth? No, it was minimal,
but it doesn't matter. It doesn't take much.
The panic was real. Yeah, the panic was real,
man. I was just like, fuck, man. This sucks.
And that was back. when I didn't have a CPAP
machine. So, I mean, it only emphasizes more.
I hate fucking beating that drum. Oh, we haven't
talked about CPAP in a long time. So, yeah, let's
spend at least two podcasts. Yeah, let's spend
the next hour talking about CPAP. But I'm telling
you, had I had that CPAP machine on there, that
may not have happened. The quality of my vacation
would have been even better. Sure. And I don't
really remember drinking the bullet. I do remember
the bullet. We were kind of like, this sucks.
Yeah, we weren't happy with it. It was a whole
handle. You and I went through a whole handle
of bullet. I think the only scenario where morning
drinking is like the thing for me. Cruise. Absolutely
cruise. Or like Cancun, right? Like the first
thing you do is go eat breakfast, and then the
next thing is like what's the drink of the day?
Margarita. Right? You know what I'm saying? So,
I mean, it's a very tropical. No, I mean, that's
what I'm saying. You don't really, I don't walk
around drinking whiskey in those environments.
We drink like the fruity shit. Yeah, when I was
in Hawaii, I drank a shit ton of Mai Tai. Oh,
a lot of sugar stuff, yeah. I drank a lot of
Mai Tais. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I think
you were asking how do I handle drinking like
for the week, right? And what I would do is fill
a tumbler, put some ice in it, and just pour
the Buffalo Trace right in it. and just walk
out to the beach and just sip that. Amen. That'll
get you blown up. Big glass, ice, whiskey, nothing
special, out there enjoying life, which is special.
With your fucking blue umbrella for 500 bucks
a week. No shit, man. No shit. Well, it sounds
like a great vacation, man. Yeah. And there was
no drama. Nobody got hurt. Nobody got stung by
anything or eaten by anything. There were some
stings from the jellyfish. A little bit. A little
bit, right? And you peed on him? Did you take
turns peeing on him? Yeah. I think we had Lemon
for that. It was a group golden shower. Some
guy named Lemon? He shit on him. My name is Lemon.
I'm here for the jelly pissing. Everybody's like,
we got to pee on him. No, I think we have to
shit on him. Metal Ark Lemon pissed on us all.
No, no, no, no, no. It's urine. It's urine, dude.
No, no, don't shit on his face. I'm in mid -push.
I'm in mid -push. Get him off of him. Get him
off of him. Why my face? It's on my foot. This
is why we shouldn't be drinking this much. Because
he's totally turtling. Anyway, so you had a great
time. And then I heard of some drama, and then
it turned out to be not true. Somebody goes,
oh, so -and -so and so -and -so broke up, and
she left. And I look at their Facebook page,
and they're still posting pictures live with
each other. Who would make fake drama on a vacation?
I don't know. That's weird. A woman? No, it was
a dude. It was Bill. Sorry, Bill. Shout out,
Bill. What's up, Bill? Why are you fucking up
the vacation for everybody? What's up with the
rumors, Bill? Yeah, no, they're still a couple.
They're still lovely people. They went fishing
with us. They're awesome. And I'm like, no way.
I liked her. First time I met her, her name's
Autumn. And she went fishing. Why are we oohing?
I don't know. Autumn kind of sounds like either
a hippie or a stripper. I'm hoping you're going
to pull out your phone to show us some pictures
here in a second. I very much want to see what
Autumn looks like now. Jeff and I both went,
ooh. And I'm not really sure why. She's a hippie
stripper. Yeah, I guess so. He's looking at his
phone. He's like, I don't know. Should I? She's
extremely jugacious. Yeah, the couple we met,
dusk and sunrise. Cinnamon. Cinnamon. Jesus.
So have you guys done offshore fishing? Before?
You know, I have not. The only fishing I've done
in New Jersey when I was really young, and then
in Pottsboro, the Texarkana, you and I went fishing.
Well, that's not offshore fishing. It's not.
So no is the answer. Really? On the East Coast,
I have yes. So technically, yes, but not to the
element that Chuck went through, nor anything
that they have on the East Coast of Texas. Oh,
yeah, sure. What about you, Jeff? No, I've never
had one. No? No. So here's my confusion. So I
went out with my college roommate and his father
who had like a 20 -foot little boat. It was a
little boat. That's small. It is small. It's
very small. And so, yeah, we... You're talking
about the boat, right? The dinghy? No, I was
fully... No. Okay. Anyway, so we went out of
Galveston and we went out to the oil rigs. Right.
Right. Perfect place. Yes. Yeah. Is that technically
offshore? Yeah. Like what does the continental
shelf? Was there a shore? Well, you're looking
for cover for the fish. The reason why I'm asking
is that I think there's a distinction between
like how far you go out to be classified as whatever
that type of fishing is. Is that a true statement?
I'm thinking like if you're in a boat and you're
not. On the beach? And you can't see the shore?
Can't see the shore, you're probably right. I'm
agreeing with you. Yeah. I'm agreeing with you.
But hell, even if you could see the shore, I
think you're still offshore. Okay, fair enough,
fair enough. Because there are some hardcore
people that go out and do swordfish, and you've
got to be way out there, apparently. I don't
know. I don't know how that works. And that's
hit or miss, right? We were going for bingos.
We were going for multiple hits and reeling it
in and having fun, right? We were not going for
the... put -it -on -your -wall type of fish,
right? Right. This is eating. This is dragging
it in. You feel a little tickle on the line,
and you're just real. All right, so let me tell
you my story. So we go out there, and this is
the first time I've ever done any of this, right?
And we're fishing, and nothing's really hitting.
And we all have our lines out there, and all
of a sudden... All three lines, like a school
of fish went by and it was like, boom, boom,
boom. Yep. Right. And everybody's, you know,
struggling and blah, blah, blah. And they, and
they got theirs in and I'm still, I'm still struggling
with mine. And they're like, okay, get the lines
cleared. Like, let's let Paul work his thing.
Right. And I'm like. burying this pole into my
shoulder. And I'm like, what the fuck? And I'm
like, this is kicking my ass. And I'm like, and
it goes, dives under the boat. And I'm like,
the rod, I'm thinking it's going to break for
sure. Finally bring this thing to the surface.
And it's a king mackerel. Right? Which is, you
know, about this big around. I've had girlfriends
like that. Yeah, exactly. I have hooked it in
the dorsal fin. Wow. How the hell did that happen?
Exactly. And so they were laughing at me when
I was struggling so much. Yeah. And they were
like, oh, no wonder. Because the fish has complete,
total, non -pain mobility because it's hooked
on the top. It's just like, how come I'm swimming
and I can't get anywhere? Yes. It's hooked in
the dorsal fin at the top of the thing. Crazy.
Crazy. And we pull it up and, yeah, we get it
out of there. But I was like, damn, man. Is that
when you popped your muscle? Shit, no. No, that's
not when that happened. But it was work, man.
It was a lot of work getting that thing out of
the water. I came home, and I'm looking in the
mirror, and I'm like, where did this bruise come
from? And I go, fishing. Fishing. Yeah, because
you do. You have to bury your pole into your...
Are you talking about that bruise? Yeah, it was
more of the hip region, but yeah. Yeah, you got
to bury it under your armpit, and damn, it was
work. But here's what we did. We tethered to
an oil rig. that was not there anymore, right?
Just the bottom part was. And the thing was going,
bong, bong. And we were just rocking and rocking.
And I was like, oh shit, I'm going to get seriously
sick. So luckily somebody brought beef jerky.
Oh, sustain you, yeah. Beef jerky time. So apparently
beef jerky, I don't know if it works for everybody.
No. Anyway, to finish. Beef jerky time. Yeah,
so to finish the story, I don't know if it works
for everybody. but it completely made my nausea
go away. Fantastic. Because I was chewing on
beef jerky, and I was telling them that we were
tethered to an oil rig, the bottom, it wasn't
there anymore, but the... The base? Yeah, the
base was there. And we were just rocking and
rocking, and it was a ping, ping. And I was like,
oh my God. It wasn't bong. One ping only. No,
it was a ping. And it was annoying. Because I
remember I was on the East Coast and they had
the same kind of buoys out there with the bell.
Worn the boats and stuff. And it was kind of
like bong. It wasn't a ping. But it was annoying.
Anyway, the beef jerky kept me from completely
vomiting. What if that's a salt in there? I don't
know. But anyway, that's a tip. That's a hack.
For our listeners. Beef jerky. If you're feeling
sick, maybe try some beef jerky. Were you told
that or is that just by chance? By chance. I've
got some, I made some pork jerky downstairs the
other day. Did you? It's actually very good.
Why don't you bring it up here and we'll have
a little snack. All right, I'll go get some.
Are you serious? Yeah, I'll go get some. Let's
do it. I'm very excited. Me too. Fully erect.
Fully erect. Wow. I have a penis sheath. Show
the camera. Penis. Listeners, turn away. Turn
away. Whatever you do. The cameras are on. We
got to remember that. Shit. We got video now.
I know. You can show your dick if you want. Okay.
Wow. Wow. If you want. We're not doing dick pics.
I mean, I don't want to see it. We're not showing
our junk on our podcast. Your back pocket's sticking
out, Jeff. What's wrong with this guy? God. He's
going out and getting pork jerky. I know. Do
whatever the fuck he wants. You can whip your
dick out if you want. Okay. Anyway. We are going
to be showing our hogs. As the pork jerky comes
here, what do you have, Sean? Well, I mean, I
did not snag a fish in the dorsal fin, but, you
know, look, we've got experience going out and
fishing. And it's fun. It's addicting. I mean,
I wouldn't mind going back out to Pottsboro.
Yeah, Lake Texoma. When it's like 20 degrees
on the lake. I would subscribe to that program.
It was miserable. So our listeners out there,
this was what, 15 years ago? Oh, I don't know.
It was a very, very long time ago. I blocked
it all out. So we went out there. My brother
-in -law at the time, he was like, hey, let's
go out there and we're going to go. We chartered
a boat, went out there in the middle of the lake,
and it was fun. It was cold as fuck. I wear preferred
gear. Appropriate attire? Yeah, something that
you're supposed to wear in a boat. Nobody emailed
me. Paul brings a down cotton jacket. One that
when it gets wet, it... Turns into an ice block.
Yes, yes. So we're out in the water for probably
two hours. Hour and a half, right? Oh, my God.
Dude, it was so freaking cold. And I was in the
front. Yeah. I was in the front. We turn around,
and we're having a good time, both Mark and I.
We're cold, but we're having a good time. And
we turn to look at Paul, and his bottom mouth
was like shivering. His chin was like this. I
was like, I was like, I was like, can we go back?
Can we go back? So Jeff broke out. So what do
we got here? We got like this light kind of pork
here. That's pork. This is beef. And these are
apples. Do you know what this looks like? It
looks like the ears you give your dog. No, not
toffee. What are those? Caramel? Yeah, it looks
like weird color. It's pork. I know. I'm not
questioning that. Okay, here we go. We're going
to try your pork jerky. So it's like a pork chop.
Kind of looks like a piece of bacon. That's been
sitting in the pan all night. No. This was actually
a pork loin that I sliced up. Yeah, it looks
like bacon. It's terrific. It's terrific. That
is great. And how did you dry that out? Eating
on the air. I just hung it on the laundry line.
For real? No. Oh. That's what they used to do
back in the day. You have to have a dehydrator.
I got a dehydrator downstairs. Oh. I'm sorry.
Your smoker can also do it. I used my smoker
when I, actually, no, I used a dehydrator on
that as well. This is amazing. How much, is it
a pound? It was a pork loin, so I don't know.
You know those little pork loins? Was that whole
thing a pork loin? Yeah. It's really good. What?
It's fucking amazing. That's all that's left?
I've eaten some. So let's just say you have a
five pound pork loin. How much will be left at
the end of the process? Not very much because
it pulls out all the moisture. Like a pound?
Probably, yeah. I don't know. Yeah, this is really,
really good. Oh, my God. I'm so excited. You
need to market this shit. You lose quite a bit
when you dehydrate. You'd be surprised. That's
why it's so expensive. Yeah, that's why it costs
18 bucks for a bag of it. But you know what?
Julie, when she was at Market Street, you know
when they have the meat that's almost expired?
Two days. Oh, that's perfect. She found like
three or four pork loins, 97 cents each. Each?
Not a pound. Each. Each. 97 cents. So she bought
three or four of them. For jerky? Yeah. She bought
them for jerky. So this was my first one to do.
That is perfect. Yeah. Huge success. That's really,
really good, dude. Yeah. You are the meatologist,
man. You really are. You're Dr. Meat. Is it pear
or apple? These are apples. Dehydrated apples.
Nothing else on them. I want to call you Dr.
Meat from now on. Hold on. Try these apples here.
How do you like them apples? Hold on, let me
do it. So Jeff, for our listeners out there,
I don't know why he has numb hands. Jeff, it
has nothing to do with numb. I'm not sure what
it is. We haven't diagnosed him yet. So when
we go out to places. Like Home Depot. Let's just
say Home Depot. All right? And he picks up something.
It could be anything. Anything. It really could
be anything. Actually, it's everything. Let's
say it comes out of a - Everything he picks up.
Out of a bin. Whatever it is. It could be, let's
say, a little piece of wood, piece of trim, stick
of glue. Instead of setting it back down where
he got it, he launches it. That was a horrible
throw, by the way. Don't watch a horrible throw.
He launches it. He slams it back down until the
rubber bins are like, wham! And I was like, God.
Damn, dude, what's up with that? What really
got me, you had said that, like you made a comment
about, oh, he's going to throw shit down, and
we went to that specialty wood store, and that's
like expensive little chunks of wood, right?
And you're like looking at it, and you're like
flipping it over, and you're like, kabam! You're
like, kabam! I'm like, what the fuck? Sean's
right. There's something wrong with him. Where
does that come from? I have no idea. I don't
pay attention to it. I just said it. I don't
feel bad. Brother, please. This is why we need
video. We do have video. I know. This is why
we needed to do this. This is beef. The apple's
good, too, by the way. Yeah, it's good. There's
nothing. Why not do like a cinnamon? I was going
to put cinnamon on one of them. But I don't have
any cinnamon, so. Oh, well, there you go. How
could you not have cinnamon? Cinnamon. Cinnamon.
What do you think of that one? All right, so
I'm diving into the beef one. This is the beef,
yeah. Beef. What kind of beef? What's it cut?
It is a sirloin. Mm -hmm. Yeah. Oh, my gosh.
This is almost like whiskey. I know. It's a lot
of raisin, a lot of... You got any rattlesnake
on there? The finish is a lot of caramel and
tobacco. It's really good, man. Some molasses.
What is on that? What is on the beef? Some anise.
You know that you see those big squeeze bottles
of Japanese barbecue sauce? Oh, yeah. That's
what's on there. Some chocolate. You know, it's
really actually not that hard. You can buy a
dehydrator. It's not hard at all. At all. I slice
it and I put it on there. I turn it on for, that
took nine hours to do that. So I have a, I think
I've got rid of it now, but I had a dehydrator
that had all these trays on it. It's around,
it's like Oscar. That's the one I got downstairs
probably. What is it, Oster? Oster. Oster? Is
it Oster? I don't know. Anyway, and yet you just,
exactly, you follow the directions. You season
it however you want. And you lay the raw strips
out there and turn the thing on. What was that?
The apples take about two and a half, three hours.
I want to do other fruits as well. They're puffy
too. Really good, man. Well done. And jerky's
fucking expensive. Oh, God, yeah. But to buy.
Yeah, but to buy. Make your own. Yeah, exactly.
I mean, even if you buy a – the thing is you
don't want – you want to get very extremely lean
meat. Because the fat will turn bad quickly.
Yeah, it turns into gristle that you don't want.
So you get the sirloin. You don't want the marbling
or any of that. I trim off fat and stuff like
that. I trim the fat off of this because there's
a layer of fat on it. Any fat at all goes bad.
Are you able to harvest the fat to make it into
some sort of lard? What do they call that when
you take fat off of something? Tallow? Yeah,
but you're not pulling off enough fat from this
stuff. I don't know. I don't know how that works.
Brisket, you absolutely will. Yeah, I've done
it with the brisket a few times. Big tallow,
so to speak? Oh, yeah. I have some in my fridge
downstairs. That's what I use to cook with. Interesting.
And it's 100 % beef tallow. Nothing crazy in
it. No seed oils. So what are you saying? You
take... You take the brisket, you put it in a
pan, on a pan. No, I trim the fat off of it.
Oh, you just trim the fat off of it. Trim the
fat off of it, and I put it in the pan and let
it cook all day, like 8, 9, 10 hours. And that's,
yeah, the fat that you pull off the brisket is
what the tallow is, yes. That's it. That's it.
So what is the reason why you have to put it
in the pan for such an extended period? You want
to slow cook it so it melts, essentially. Like
butter. It renders. Oh, so the proteins change
its form. Yeah, so it just melts. What's left
when you're done should be almost like chicharrones
type of things. Chicharrones? Chicharrones. They're
almost little crunchy little things. That was
pretty good, actually. Yeah, that was a little
too good. No, that was really good. It gave me
a migraine. All that quick, huh? Yeah. So I've
got some doubts. Very good. Hats off to you,
man. That was a good poll. Yep. Very nice. I
guess now that I have time, I'm getting into
it. I don't want to buy all the store -bought
shit. Granted, I'm still buying the brisket from
Kroger and shit like that. Yeah, but you're grinding
your own meat, and now you're curing bacon. Oh,
yeah. Have you guys tried the bacon? Not yet.
I froze it. You know what, Tara? My wife had
some surgery today. On her foot, she had something
removed. I'll forget. A plantar something. Plantar
fasciitis. Plantar fasciitis. So she had a piece
of her foot removed in November of 2024. She
wore a boot for a month or so, and she got over
it. In the last eight months, it came back with
a vengeance. Yeah, that's weird. And she had
it removed again today, and it was like. It was
large. Like the size of a nickel? A dime? It
was way bigger. It was like a quarter. It was
two and a half inches tall. Oh, my God. Inch
and a quarter wide. Wow. And about three -eighth
inch thick. Well, plantar fasciitis is the tendon
you see there. It's not a growth. Well, the section.
Yeah, but the growth might have been causing
plantar fasciitis. It sounds like she had some
kind of growth on her foot. Well, they called
it plantar fasciitis, I guess. But he cut out
a huge section, a huge section. So how long is
she going to be? Fibroma? Well, it'll be. Plantar
fibroma? Maybe, maybe. I don't know what exactly
it was. Did she have a bulge on the bottom of
her foot like that? Yeah, it was a bulge, yep.
So she had a, well, we're Google docking it.
Yeah, so it could be a fibroma. We're diagnosing
her right now. So she had 100 % certainty fibroma.
Yeah, these are doctor dudes like us. Because
we know. Yeah, because we're experts. But if
they cut it out, that's probably what it is there.
So it was a very large incision. It was probably
about four to five inches. Damn. It was a rather
extreme procedure because it came back with a
vengeance. Yeah. And it was causing a lot of
discomfort for her every time she was walking.
And I never understood it because I don't know.
I'm not walking her. Yeah. You're like, I don't
have that problem. Walk it off. Yeah. Rub some
dirt on it. Rub some dirt on it, man. What's
going on with you? What is it? Put some oil on
it. Put some castor oil on it. Castor oil. That
fixes everything. Well, I'll tell you what. I
just bought myself some new shoes, and I'll tell
you my experience. I have bad feet. My bones
inside my feet, they go the wrong way. And they
actually grind on each other. Oh, my gosh. Look
at that. Chuck, you can turn that shit off. He's
showing a surgery of removing it. That's what
your wife's foot looks like now. Stop it. Make
it go away right now. That looks like a cadaver.
What the hell? So anyway, I bought some shoes.
I just went to Academy and I picked up some Brooks.
Academy. New Balance? No, they were Brooks. Okay.
You both are idiots. All right, please, Jeff,
continue your story. So, you know, my feet were
hurting. Why am I an idiot? I don't know. And
these are nice shoes. You know, the Brooks makes
really nice shoes. You're doing the jingle. And
I told my wife, I was like, you know, my feet
are killing me. They're still hurting. So she
went, she buys her shoes from an actual running
store. Yeah. Called Fleet Feet, I think. Oh.
And what's the brand? It is Brooks? Brooks. Well,
they sell all the brands that Academy has. But
what they don't have at Academy, the people at
these stores know their shit. Yes. They look
at your foot. Well, the guy that she worked with,
she's been buying shoes with him for 15 years.
Yep. So he's been there for that long doing this,
and I'm sure they got training and all this stuff.
So when she was getting her shoes, she told him
about my feet, and he's like, and he went over
there and grabbed a couple of shoes. And he goes,
you probably need different kind of support.
What are you guys doing? He heard something.
Yeah, I heard something. It sounded like he farted.
Let's just let this out. No, I had a burp that
I never let out in my mouth, and my throat was
right in the microphone. Sean is very susceptible
to noises. Very, very. And I'm not. Especially
with you guys. I'm hearing impaired. You guys
are foul. All right, so you had an expert look
at your foot and said, this is the Brooks shoe
for you, sir. So I go and he goes, you know,
all these shoes have, everyone's feet are different,
right? So all these shoes have different supports.
They have edge supports, they have sole supports,
all kinds of shit inside. Yes. And he goes, it
sounds like, and I actually showed him the x
-ray of my feet. Oh, wow. When I went back in.
He goes, yeah, I still think you need this. I'd
like to see that x -ray. I don't. Is it like
in different directions? Yes. They go like this.
Is it just normal growth patterns? Totally not
normal. Well, I mean, for him. Well, when I was
talking to him about it, he goes, and I told
him, I was like, I wore corrective shoes every
year for about 10 years where I'd go in because
my parents thought I had flat feet. So they put
me in. I'd go in and get Sean's jealous because.
Paul finishes bourbon. Yeah, I'm a man. Yeah.
And so I wore these corrective shoes for probably
a decade. And he goes, that may have forced your
bones to grow a certain way. That's fair assessment
for sure. You know, medicines and medical procedures
aren't perfect. And they're not conclusive. There's
no way to know something's 100%. did 10 years
ago may be frowned upon today or vice versa.
Oh, yeah. They advance technology, right? Granted,
a lot of it is based on money, which is bullshit.
Is that real? That's my foot. That's crazy. Let
me see. Look at that. That is developmental stuff.
Yeah. 100%. What the hell, man? That was powdered
milk. So all this stuff right here is grinding.
That's where all that paint is right there where
all those shit touch. I can imagine. You're like
an alien. Well, it looks like. Well, the feet
look normal on the outside, but inside they do
not. So it almost looks like for a long time
you had some, I'm going to use the word rubbery,
but you had some sort of contorting in there
that wasn't rigid. What would cause that? And
it formed that. Well, I think, well, I never
thought of it, but the corrective shoes, it was
trying to give me an arch. Right? Because my
parents, the doctors say, well, he's got flat
feet. Back then, flat feet were a concern for
whatever reason. Right. And it was like cookie
cutter. Flat feet, flat feet, flat feet, flat
feet, flat feet. So you treat it this way. So
I wore these corrective shoes that was pushing
my bones in a certain way, and I think that was
doing it. So what about you, just throwing this
out there, because I have fucking no idea, but
what if you just didn't wear shoes for a long
time? I did that for eight years when I worked
from home. Right now, you're wearing shoes. No,
I'm not. Oh, you're barefoot. Yeah. What if you
wore those bamboo things that the little Chinese
ladies or the Japanese ladies in there, and they're
like... What if you bound your feet? Bound your
feet, yes. That could help. Yeah? I don't know.
Is that expensive? If you remember out in Tahoe,
I was really struggling coming down that mountain
because my feet were hurting so bad because I
had a really hard time coming back down because
my feet were killing me. I didn't recognize any
of that. I didn't think... That existed in you.
That's intense. It's very uncomfortable for me.
Okay, so hold on. In the Brooks shoes? What's
the verdict? He went out there. Actually, they're
not Brooks. I returned the Brooks, and I got
Saucony shoes, or Saucony, however you want to
say it. Saucony. Has it made a difference? He
put them on my feet. He tied them. He goes, all
right, go walk around. He goes, I had no pain.
Really? I was like, I'll take them. Damn. When
was this? This was last weekend. Are they significantly
more expensive than the average shoe? Well, no.
They're very similar in price. You may spend
$15 more at this place. Yeah, we're talking $165,
$175. These were $160. Yeah, there you go. The
shoes I returned were $120, but those were on
sale at the time. It's normal for shoes to be
$160. So what I'm saying is don't go to Academy.
Go to one of these places. They have the machines.
They'll measure your feet. They'll look at them.
They know what they're doing. Talk to these guys.
Say, this is what my feet feel like. This is
what my knees feel like. They'll look at you
and they'll say, you need this kind of support.
And it will actually help you out. That's awesome.
Get Al Bundy on the horn. Geez. Al Bundy. Dude,
you should call it. They should make a foot service
called Bundy Services. And the shoe's nice looking,
too. And there's nothing. It looks like one of
these. It's just like a regular athletic shoe.
What are you going to wear it for? I wear it
for work all day. Yeah, good for you. So Shelly
used to go to a store that was like Run Along
or Run On. Yeah, same type of place. Is it Run
On? Run On. It used to be Luke's Locker. It used
to be one of those. And same type of deal. They
had Brooks and they had experts that studied
your feet. I'm familiar with Luke's Locker. Luke's
Locker was... Where I had got those shoes I was
referring to. Well, they went out of business.
But he said it was like. Yes. So Luke's Locker,
actually this guy that helped me, Trevor, worked
at Luke's Locker. That's where Julie found him
15 years ago. And then when Luke's Locker went
out, he moved over to Fleet Feet. And he's been
there for however long, 10 years or so. You know
what? I would think there's enough people that
have specialty problem feet. I don't necessarily
have problem feet, but what I am looking for
is a nice, comfortable shoe that's based on my
needs. And it sounds like I'm going to be hitting
up Homeboy. What's his name again? Trevor. Because
when you go in there, they'll have a little QR
code. You get on the wait list. and you can actually
choose who you want to work with. It'll list
all the associates that are working there. Pick
Trevor. So here's the problem. I don't think
people know about this kind of stuff. That's
what I'm telling you. And they just live with
the wrong shoe for their feet. That's what I
told Julie. And their knees and their hips or
whatever. Because she was in there, and he's
looking at it. He's like, you know, you need
this kind of shoe. They have records of all her
history, which she's purchased. Beautiful. And
they go back there and look, and they're like,
how'd this one do for you? And she's like, well,
it felt like this. She's like, okay, well. We
need to stick with that or we need to change
something, right? Love that. That is actually
pretty cool. And all you're doing at the end
of this is spending the same amount of money
that you would on a quality shoe. Correct. But
you have someone informed. Absolutely. Correct.
And with a history of your needs. Correct. So
now I have this history there. And I'll be going
back. You went to Frisco Running. No, I went
to Fleet Feet. Oh, Fleet Feet. Well, he has Frisco
Running up here. Damn it. Fuck it, producer.
Damn it. It's right next to Norma's. You know
where Norma's is? Oh, yeah. It's right next to
Norma's. That's where Paul and I usually go to.
Oh. Oh. Sorry. Okay. But only on every. Only
when it's outside of town. Only third Thursday.
Yeah. When it's a blue moon. So I highly, highly
recommend hitting this place. Have we even done
that? Oh, we did that when Alan was in town.
That's not the same thing. Once in a while. Was
it enormous? No. That was the day you damaged
my car. Oh, my God. Here we go. What? I did not
damage your car. If something hit the windshield
while I was driving it, I didn't even notice
that it happened. That was the day that Jeff
was out helping his wife because she purchased
some badass shoes up from Fleet. Yeah, and you
guys shut down every road in Frisco. Thanks a
lot. Due to the marathon experience in the portion
of Frisco that we were at, shut down every god
-blessing road where we were at. I had no problem.
It was insane. I had zero problems. But you were
walking. No, I was driving my car. We had a lot
of problems. We did. I think that's user error.
No. We tried every possible exit point. They
gave you three weeks notice. Oh, that doesn't
matter. We don't listen to things like that.
Did you see his hand gesture? Three weeks. What
are you, Vanna White? What's going on? I don't
know what he's doing. Well, you said we had to
be more expressive. Yeah. I'm rethinking this
video thing. I really am. This is not going to
work for us. Right. So anyway, long story short,
screw all those other big box stores. Go to places
like this. Oh, my God. Yeah, sorry. Yeah, I agree
100%. In fact, I need shoes. I'm going to go
hit them up. I'm going to go see Trevor. I'm
going to go buy some shoes because I had some
Brooks, and they work great. They have run their
course, no pun intended, every pun intended.
I need another pair, and I don't think these
are going to be the sharp blue ones that I bought
last time. I don't know if you guys recall that.
Well, it's funny. As I walked in there the first
time with my wife when she was getting nervous,
I was wearing my Brooks, you know, the Texas
Star ones I have, the red, white, and blue ones.
Oh, yeah. He looks at me and goes, you need new
shoes. He goes, your feet are. flopping over
the edges. I was like, yeah, these are old. And
I was like, I just bought a pair, actually. And
I was like, and they don't feel great on my feet.
That's how we got started talking about it. So
I'm eager to hear. So I'm eager to hear. So that
was just last weekend. That was last weekend.
Yeah, you've been wearing them for a week. A
week. Not even. Yeah. So I want to hear. Like,
keep us posted on this. All right. Okay? Because,
you know, you're new to it. And I want to hear
how your feet adjust. Well, I asked about it.
you know, what's your return policy? He's like,
he's like, you know, after a couple, 30 days,
he goes, but you know, if you need to return
these, you know, two weeks, bring them back.
Love it. We'll get you something else. All right.
So when you're, when you're out there, um, jogging
around and I'm telling you, I, I have gone out
to like common park and I've got my Brooks on
and. There are strange animals. Your segues are
awful. You need to work on these segues. Your
segues are absolutely awful. You know what? Work
with it. We've been doing this for six years.
Most dangerous animals of each state. All right.
This is the next topic, you sorry Saxon. Our
producer has thrown another map of America on
the screen here. And yes, it is the most dangerous
animals for each state. And they're grouped.
It's not each state, but there's like... regions,
basically, right? Texas, Oklahoma, and Arkansas
have a specific animal that is considered the
most dangerous animal. And I've got to be surprised.
I am surprised. This caught me off guard. I didn't
really know. A couple of them actually really
surprised me. Yes. All right, so let's go around
Robin. Let's start with the top of the color
chart, and let's go down to the bottom of the
color chart. So let's start with grizzly bear
brown on the top. So that region is dark brown.
No, it's the diarrhea brown. Is it diarrhea brown?
Yes. All right, so it is. It's Nebraska, Montana,
and Wyoming. No, it's Montana, Wyoming, and North
Dakota. North Dakota. Oh, what the hell? Oh,
I knew that. And Alaska. Yes. What the hell,
man? So South Dakota and Nebraska is the American
version. So the most dangerous animals of those
four states are the grizzly bear. The grizzly
bear. Yes. So, you know, a lot of people don't
know. I mean, what are the differences? What
is more ferocious, a black bear or a grizzly
bear? Grizzly bears are larger. A much larger.
The white bear is... It's a polar bear. A polar
bear? Yeah. The white bear. What? What? The white
bear? Okay. No more bourbon for our producer.
What was that, Mr. Producer? Bring some more
bourbon over here. I'll be fine. The polar bear
is the most deadly, but second is grizzly, right?
Right. And then black bear is... below that.
Yeah, and the irony is the polar bear is like
so cute. Yeah. Oh, it's so ferocious though.
So cute. It's the Apex. On the Coca -Cola commercials,
right? When you are in their territory, you are
not the Apex predator. They are. They are 100
% the Apex predator. Yes. You will not survive.
Okay. All right. So we just said Montana, North
Dakota, and Wyoming is clearly the grizzly bear.
And Alaska. And Alaska. No shit. That's weird.
Grizzly bear in Alaska. I don't think a lot of
people would guess that ever. Now. Well, there's
a lot of areas in Nebraska that aren't like snow
cover areas. What did I say? Nebraska. What the
hell's wrong with me? It's a second half. This
is an alcohol experiment. Did you ever see that
movie Grizzly Man? Where he actually gets eaten
at the end? Oh, yeah. The documentary? Ridiculous.
No. He was living with grizzly bears in Alaska.
And he was video himself. Well, the very last
scene is just the audio of him getting eaten.
Wow. You hear it. Is he screaming? Yes. He was
getting eaten. The screen went dark and you just
hear us. And so, hold on, there was people filming
him? He was filming himself. Oh, okay. Thank
you. They found his remains and the camera. Found
his GoPro, yeah. Yeah. Oh, nice. Jesus. All right,
let's move on. They made a movie up. All right,
so the Tann is Mountain Lion. That's in the northwest
region, Washington, Oregon, Idaho, Utah, Colorado.
Mountain Lion. Have you ever been out in Colorado
a lot, Mr. Paul? Actually, I've never seen a
bear. I was going to ask the group, has anybody?
What does a mountain lion look like? Like a poobah?
Do we have time to go through all this? Or a
cougar? Pull up a mountain lion. I want to see
what it looks like. They're not as big as you
think, but they are scary. So they're kind of
lean, and they're probably, what, 60 to 80 pounds?
No, they're bigger than that. I don't think so.
You'd be surprised. You've seen a mountain lion
before, Sean. You've seen Mutual of Omaha. All
right. Well, okay. I see. So the mountain lion.
With Merle Perkins. Wow. Mountain lion is also
called a cougar. Is that correct? Cougar or puma.
So known as a mountain lion or puma. The cougar,
also known as a mountain lion or puma, is a large
solitary wildcat native to the Americas, known
for powerful build, stealth, adaptability. How
heavy are they? 120 to 160 pounds. Damn it. Damn
close. Why am I always so wrong? Yeah, but you
got to think about it. Your cat in the house
has got a lot of shit going on. Wait a second.
I saw something else there. I saw 70 to something
else pounds. Yeah, look at that. 70 to 110 pounds.
Those are children. Those are the females. Well,
that's what I was talking about, female. Well,
there's no difference between a male and female.
What's wrong with that? That's right. Well, that's
true. They're transgender. Jesus. All right,
let's move on. Those are very dangerous. Mountain
lion is very dangerous. We're going to move from
the tan to the, what is that, the salmon color?
The salmon color, yes. So that's the rattlesnake
region. I thought Texas would be prime for rattlesnakes.
We're going to hit Texas pretty quick. The rattlesnake
for the New Mexico, Arizona, Nevada, California.
It doesn't mean that rattlesnakes are not in
Texas. It just means that it's not the number
one. So did y 'all answer the question? Has anybody
run across? Any of these dangerous animals? No,
I have not so far. I've run across a rattlesnake.
I have black bears. I was actually in Nevada.
We haven't gotten to black bears, Jeff. I was
in El Paso, Texas on a mountain... And a moose.
Mountain scenic drive or something. I've seen
a moose. On the TV. No. I carried a .38 special
revolver and it had shot in it. Not a regular
bullet. It had a shot in there. Buckshot, specifically
for rattlesnakes. All right. So there we have
rattlesnake and tiger shark. This is an obvious
one. Hold on. I thought tiger shark was like
a fish. That's in Missouri. It's a shark. And
that would be Hawaii. That's an easy one. American
bison is an easy one. We kind of touched on it
already. That's it. South Dakota and Sean's favorite.
State, Nebraska. Well, and it would be Yellowstone,
right? Is that where Yellowstone is? No? No,
that's in Wyoming. No, that's in Wyoming. A bison
is dangerous? I think the yellow. Is that for
like stampeding? Stone pet the furry cows. I
think the yellow is very interesting, and that's
got the most states. It does. A white -tailed
deer. It's the most dangerous animals. Well,
you know, there's a lot of stupid hunters that
put on a mating scent. You know, to attract the
males. Like gasoline? Well, yeah. Oh, no, that's
different. More like pee. So that's Kansas, Missouri,
Iowa, Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, Pennsylvania,
New York, and a bunch of little ones over there.
And the hunters get attacked by male deer because
they've sprayed that shit on themselves. Jesus.
Do you think that's what it is? I think that's
100 % what it is. Yep. All right. Then we get
the black bear, which is the Michigan, Wisconsin,
Minnesotas. Yes. Right on the Canadian border.
Yes. American alligator. Which is down the south,
right? Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama. Florida,
Georgia, South Carolina. Georgia, South Carolina,
Florida. And this was a surprise to me. Feral
hog. A feral hog, Texas, Oklahoma, and Arkansas.
Yeah. Those are nasty animals. Dude, especially
the one with the tusk, man. Oh, yeah. Don't fuck
with those things. They're scary. So I brought
this up in a topic. There was a... Some colleagues
that came down to Texas from other parts of the
United States that were visiting, and they were
kind of like what we talked during about halftime.
We're kind of Republicans, and they're not. And
they were in our area, and they were like, well,
why do you guys need all these guns, and why
do you need this and that? And I brought up the
fact about, I brought up the feral hogs. It's
like, I tell you what, you can drive, I could
take you 30 minutes from here, put you in the
middle of the field, and I'm going to hand you
a revolver with six bullets. Good luck. You know,
and then you're going to be like, all right,
well, now I understand why you need magazines
with like 20 rounds in it, you know? Yeah. Your
justification for magazines and guns was how
we get attacked by feral hogs. It's a real life
experience. I get it. But yeah, I don't think
we're at a huge risk of being attacked by feral
hogs. But there are, we may not. If we all want
to own property in Texas someday, we're going
to deal with it. That's for real. That's 100
% for real. And you're going to need to be able
to... It'd be ridiculous for you to be carrying
around a bunch of 12 -round magazines. It's not
sustainable. Well, first off, what would be...
If you're walking your property and you know
you have feral hogs... I believe it's just open
game all year. Yes, it is. Yes, it is. But what's
the weapon you would be carrying? It's not a
shotgun. No, it's not a shotgun. I want a big
old rifle. Unless it's, what do you call it?
Why do you say it's not a shotgun? It depends
on the shell that you're putting in there. If
it's a slug. Yeah, if it's a bird shell that
bouts off of it. Well, remember our guest. We're
going to have Larry weigh in on this. Larry,
Mr. Cuvion, was on our podcast several times.
He's actually been taken up in a helicopter.
Right. And they swoop down through these fields
and all of a sudden, boom, these feral hogs just
like disperse. Boom. Right. And he's got a strap
on. Let me rephrase that. He's got a shoulder
thing around him to keep him from falling off
the helicopter. That's a good thing. And he is
leaning over the side and he's got a shotgun.
And he's blasting. He's probably using slugs.
He's using slugs. Okay. But still, I mean, it's
a shotgun. That's what I'm saying. That's why
I brought that up. Yeah. So I clarified it. When
we think shotgun, we think birdshot. We think
buckshot. No, you need stopping power. Right.
You need a slug. But he was letting them out.
And he said he was going to town. And he was
putting them down. Was it a .50 cal? All right.
Let's burn through these. Okay. Last one. Copperhead
snake. Copperhead snake is in the mid -region
on the East Coast, covering West Virginia, Kentucky,
Tennessee, North Carolina, and Virginia. Very
nice. And then the great white shark. Surprisingly.
That's Kansas, isn't it? Delaware, Maryland.
Oh. My bad. That is crazy. That is a little crazy,
yeah. And Moose. But then even Jaws was filmed,
right? Yeah. In New England, right? Yep, it was.
It wasn't filmed in Florida. Well, they followed
him down to Florida in Jaws 4. Oh, that's right.
The smart shark. All right, so Moose. Rounding
this out. Moose is Maine and Vermont. Maine,
Vermont, and New Hampshire. So it's like... There
are three states up in the very tip of the Northeast.
I'm kind of curious. What was in Colorado? That
wasn't moose. Yeah, it was. We had a mating pair
of moose. I saw moose up in Wyoming as well.
It was crazy. We were in a camp. We were hunting
elk. Then we're in the early morning and we're
getting... Jeff, I'm going to have another one.
I'm sorry. This is great. I apologize. Anyway,
so we're leaving camp and there's a car on the
dirt road and we're like, and then people get
out of the car and they go off into this meadow
and I can't see them. And I'm like, what's going
on? And we pull around. Was it a couple? Yeah.
We pull around. It's kind of like the idiots
in Yellowstone. Oh, yeah. We pull around and
there's moose standing in the field and they're
trying to get close to it to take a picture.
I'm like, oh, my God. Those things are huge.
Huge and dangerous. Did you jump to action, pull
your rifle out, dig it out, the gas? No, we drove
around them and said, you guys are fucking idiots,
and drove on. Did you say that, really? Yes.
Kind of. All right. All right, let's do it. We
have a burger. What are you doing there? Your
meat? The meat is good. That's the incorrect
one, Chuck. Oh, great. All right, well, look,
here's the thing. What are we paying you for?
We've got their Lurkin High Wheat Risky that
you've acquired through our advent calendar for
those listeners out there that Jeff took a trip
out to Kentucky, and he came back with two dozen
different whiskeys for us to... Two dozen? Ish,
you know, 17, 18. It was about 17 or 18 years.
Oh, good Lord. It was a lot. A lot. Yes, it was.
Yeah. I didn't realize that much. When you're
in the midst of it, you're just like, oh, here's
another good one. Here's another good one. Oh,
I got to have that one. Then you get home, you're
just like, fuck. Yeah, well, I'm super excited
because every time, because, you know, Jeff was
excited, too. He wanted to, like, tell us what
he had. I was like, no, no, no, no. No, no, no,
no. Don't spoil it. And I'm telling you what,
this was such a fantastic surprise because the
first one we had, the Larrikin. Yeah, Larrikin.
Is that the one? Yeah, this is it. That's it.
Single barrel high wheat rye. And when I was
there, I tasted this. Is that right? Yes. And
the way they explain it is this mash bill is
actually unique. There's not very many out there
that are like this. So it's a whiskey. It's a
rye whiskey that has 65 % rye and 35 % wheat.
So I think the wheat. They call it a high wheat
rye whiskey, which is odd because it doesn't
have corn. And it doesn't have barley. Barley?
Barley, no. I've never seen a mash bill that
has never had barley. It's eight years aged.
Is that what this says? Yeah, I think so. Eight
years, yeah. This is bottle 76. Beautiful. This
is really, really good. Yes, it is. I'll tell
you what. So this strikes two. The larrikin we
had a month ago and a half ago was... It scored
high points. This one's also going to score very
high points. This is terrific. Yeah. Jeff, it
was a good score. What was the cost point on
this? Even the nose is amazing. It's high anise
kind of licorice initial taste to it, and it
just grows on you. I don't know if it's the pork
and beef jerky that's kind of accentuating some
of the happiness coming out of my pores. I'm
with you on that. I hope this is pork and Jeff
isn't, like, euthanizing some children. It's
actually human. It's a dog. Is it a dog? Great.
No, it's pork. Is it Sasha? It's pork. She's
still alive. That's her neck meat. Oh. Too soon?
Too soon. No, so larrikin, they don't distill
their stuff, so they're kind of like a, what
do we call them, rare character? Rare character.
Where they find the good barrels. and they bottle
them up. I don't know if they age them any more
than what's already aged, but good shit. Very
unique. Good stuff. So I wonder what would separate
Lurkin from, let's say, the blendery. The whiskey
blendery. Those two we had are single barrels.
They're not blended anything. That's true. That's
a really, really difficult question to answer.
I mean, it boils down to exactly what we're tasting,
right? Yes. Not the process, not the blend, or
not the single barrel. I mean, when you're holding
two Glencairns, right, and you've got two different
things, and you don't even know where they've
come from, and you try them, that would be the
only way to answer that question, Sean. Does
that make sense? Like you can't say, you can't
put up a... a unique mash bill single barrel
against some sort of blendery thing that they...
I get it. Is that making sense? No, but what
I was doing, I was drawing some straight lines
between like Rare Character versus Lurican versus
the blendery. The blendery, I get it. You and
I went there. They mixed some stuff up. So basically
the blendery grabs like Rare Character and Lurican
and they mix them up. And they produce something
that somebody would want. And their product is
good. It is. But it's basically like Oak and
Eden where they're... No, no, it's not. You know
what? I don't even want to talk about that. And
I don't want to slam them either because they
have some fantastic products. It's just something
unique. Anyway, all right. We got to rate this,
right? All right. So hold on real quick before
we rate it. Let me see here. Lurkin High Wheat
Rye Whiskey offers tasting notes of sweetness,
maple brown sugar up front, followed by mid -palate
flavors of white pepper, cinnamon, nutmeg, and
chocolate before finished with increasing spice
barrel. What was the proof again? It's 121 .4.
Very nice. It's hot, man. Chocolate finishes
the spice, burnt toast, bitter black tea. The
high wheat content is, I'm telling you, the high
wheat part makes it almost creamy. It completely
mellows out the rye. It's a crazy mixture. It
really is. It's super desirable. I'm going to
rate this, honestly, this is super unique, so
I'm going to rate it an 8 .5 for me because it's
in a category by itself, and it's going to score
high. Yeah. Yeah, we don't have anything like
this. I'm not going to go that high. I'm going
7 .8. I think I'm at an 8 .3. It's good stuff.
Good stuff. Really, really good stuff. Hey, Chuck,
Jeff, Paul. Cheers, guys. Cheers. Happy August
22nd, Dudes Like Us podcast. Thank you, Chuck,
for taking care of business like you do. Our
guests out there who listen to the podcast will
love us because I'm going to lose thousands and
thousands and thousands. Thousands. Thousands.
Check us out at dudeslikeus -podcast on Facebook
and Instagram. Dudes Like Us, I'm Chuck. I am
Paul. And I'm Jeff. We'll check you guys out.
You all right, man? I am great.