Second half.
It's so crazy.
I feel so sober.
Right?
I guess it's that damn easy 100 proof.
Well, you said you were super hungover the other day, though.
Well, I went over to Paul's house.
I'm ill.
Oh, look at Mr. Producer.
He was like, nah, he's...
He's...
Oh, was he?
He was like, I'm Spanish fly.
He was so drunk he came in out.
I know you sent me a text.
You're like, did you get drunk?
And I was like, um, yeah.
Yeah.
So, I mean, look,
I drank.
I sent you a text and it didn't hear from you until like six.
Yeah, well,
See, here's the issue.
Back in the days that we were drinking,
I was always drinking bourbon and coke
and it would be 80 proof and coke
and you drink a lot
but, you know, it's still 80.
Yeah.
Right? Now, you were sitting here pouring
124 proof.
128.
Yeah, 128 proof and we're drinking that as fast
as we drink an 80 proof.
So, it doesn't...
It doesn't work.
There's a whole new dynamic,
but before I dive into the dynamic,
which is kind of a lifestyle I've kind of adopted lately,
I want to announce
thank you, Mr. Dudes Like Us
for the second half of the podcast.
It is October 27th.
Check us out on Instagram and Facebook,
dudeslikeus-podcast
and dudeslikeus-woodcraft.
I'm Sean.
I'm Paul, but it's not October.
What did I say? October.
What the hell? I'm hoping.
And what was your name, sir?
Oh, hi, Jeff.
Hey, welcome to the podcast.
Thank you very much.
Are we going to try to do a minute of live here real quick?
Can I fix my hair?
Just a minute or two and watch you. You'll have to hold it.
What were we just talking about? I was going to talk about that real quick.
October.
Yeah, no August. I was saying...
Your new alcoholic lifestyle.
What we were talking about being drunk
and it was the thing about it
was, yeah, I did get drunk.
In fact, I was just kept popping drinks.
I was just like, bam, that 120 proof.
I was like, bam!
And then we had the Pictionary Board we were watching.
We were playing Pictionary.
And the dryer race board sat on top
of a bar stool
and the bar stool was just high enough
above the bar so that you
couldn't see what was going in the drinks.
So we set the drinks.
Or how full it was all the time.
So I would go over there and I would do a little
shrieky, shrieky, and then I was like,
I apologize for that back up for me.
So the ladies didn't see what was going on?
Oh, okay. Sean, you're delusional.
Every time I looked at Shelly, she was going,
really?
So she knew exactly what was happening
behind the Pictionary Board.
But she didn't see me pour.
Oh, okay. I'm just saying.
She can sniff it out from a mile away.
Well, look, regardless, that doesn't
matter because that's not the reason I got
Shipface. I got Shipface because I drank too much.
Let's be clear. I got Shipface for three reasons.
It was 120 approved.
I drank a lot of it.
And I started a new kind of,
you know, I fast on Mondays all day long.
And so I eat dinner
Sunday night and I don't eat again
to Tuesday morning. Well, I have abolished
that program. I've abandoned it.
I'm done. I'm now fasting
every single day doing that intermittent fasting.
So I eat from between
two and eight and then that's it.
So I find myself eating less
and it's working very slowly, but it is working.
And
by the time I'm over at Paul's house,
I mean, I'm hungry again,
but I just had a very thirsty.
Well, I mean, the alcohol
it hits me harder. Yes.
So I just have to be conscientious of it
and be an adult.
And, you know, the problem
I'm finding, which is kind of scary
is that I have
a
quench
to tickle, you know, but
I just, I
want that alcohol when it's in front of me
and I taste it and I switch it
to my mouth and I feel like Chris Farley.
It's like, hey,
you love it.
You're a nurse.
And you just want to hold it.
Is it the taste of it?
Or is it the feeling it gives you
or both? Probably everything.
It's just the whole, the whole thing.
It's just, it's just funny, man.
But anyway, so that's the reason why I think
I got drunk. Set aside from the fact
that it was 120 a proof. Thank you, Heaven's door.
Knock, knock, knock, knock,
and I have been stored. Is that what it's called? Angels and
we have. Is that what heaven's door?
You tell me, oh, seven store like cast
strength. Yeah, he was
it was, yeah,
full
strength. It was the,
it was the specs version. So we went over
there. So we had, we had a light dinner
over at the
Boomer Jax. Yeah, we went over
there and I had a burger and
they had, they have happy hour beers
on Saturday night when with their house rather
pleasantly surprised. It was the same deal
that on Friday, pretty much somewhat. Yeah.
You know, they had some foods that were
on special. You get all of them. No,
no, no, I'm trying to be,
I was trying to be kind of, I did order
a big old hamburger and then, you know,
and had
two, two beers.
You know what, it was, it was a good time.
I enjoyed it and it wasn't very expensive, you know.
Yeah, it wasn't. It was good. Well,
of course you guys split it on tray.
She didn't want to eat.
I was like, okay. I don't want to eat.
Then she eats half of balls
and then half a tears.
I think she ate
my fries. I think is what she ate.
The fries were good and we were dipping in
something. Oh, yeah.
Oh, that's what it was.
It was freaking amazing.
She buys one of those sandwiches, the Monte
Cristo. And I guess
that the Boomer Jax is a
subsidiary of the same company that owned
Benignans and so they had the same recipe.
I don't know if that's a fact.
I heard somebody say that.
She said that. I don't know.
I don't know where it came from.
Monte Cristo is known as the healthiest sandwich.
Oh, I bet it is.
Deep-fried four times.
But it came with a raspberry.
A raspberry sauce.
It typically does.
Julie likes the Monte Cristo and every time
she gets it, I try it. I'm just like, God,
I would vomit if I ate this whole thing.
Are you kidding me? Who are you?
You have to try. I've tried it every time.
I can't eat a whole sandwich of this.
What is that coming from?
I can't eat that shit.
I call bull shit.
Did you put a whole plate of long John Silver's
in front of me? I'll eat that.
Oh my God.
Anyway, so we had fries
and we were dipping them
in the raspberry. At first I was like, okay,
I'll try it. I was like, oh my God.
This is so good.
This is something. It's like a hidden
secret or something.
It was incredible.
I was like, I'm all done with my Monte Cristo.
Do you want it? And I was looking at her like, yes.
Yes, I do.
And I ate the shit out of it.
It was good.
It's got powdered sugar on it too, doesn't it?
It had everything. It had everything.
It had bacon, ham, cheese.
I had a grilled cheese sandwich.
Yeah, I had a grilled chicken sandwich
with bacon. I mean, mine was not all fancy,
but did it have
32 man-made chemicals in the sandwich
just like Popeyes? 34.
And what about
what is it? What is the other chicken place?
Chick-fil-A? Chick-fil-A.
Chick-fil-A reportedly has 42 chemicals
in the sandwich.
Not necessarily the meat alone, but the whole ensemble
is 42 chemicals. Man-made chemicals.
See, the website would
never ever say that.
And I know that they have not incentivized to say that.
But of course, sometimes I think this stuff
is just kind of overblown.
Yeah, where's it coming from?
Take time. You know, it doesn't.
You can... This was a doctor
on Instagram.
I know he's a doctor.
And he tour and test
the Chick-fil-A facility?
I don't care.
I don't care. But I know
damn well there's chemicals in it. You know there's chemicals
in it. And the fact that you're contesting it
is just nuts. I mean, the fact that a McDonald's
hamburger can sit stagnant for
fucking 30 years, come out of the bag
and look like it just popped off the grill
yesterday, no.
It doesn't matter.
That just only tells you that
if they had shit in the food 30 years ago,
what does that tell you
what's in the food today? And the fact that
what they do have in the food today
that they're not admitting is that they have
things in there. Don't put me...
They've got things that make you addicted to where you have
to eat that food again.
There's bourbon in it? No. You know what I'm talking about.
So they put drugs in it?
So look, that is part of one of RFK's
running platforms. That's one of his
policies that he's trying to get rid of.
It's not just unhealthy.
It's just stuff
that shouldn't be in the food.
There is no way
that it would pass over in Europe.
None of this shit would fly. And yet
we're allowed to do it because we're Americans
and we get away with everything, eats and
farts. Wait a second. That's Austrian.
Are we American?
I think we had this discussion, is Europe healthier
than America?
What's their lifespan? I think we looked at that.
It really wasn't that much longer.
I don't think it's a matter of the lifespan.
I think it's the quality of life.
If you're fighting cancer for the last 10 years...
That's a good point. If you're constantly inflamed
and chronically ill...
Do we know they're not? I don't know.
Well, no. I don't see it.
We don't live over there. We don't know.
All my European friends are healthy.
I'll tell you what. My experience being over there
is that all those guys were...
The majority of them weren't heavyweight.
Well, they weren't back in the 70s and 80s
or either.
Um...
Again, my experience just looking at it,
I didn't notice that.
You know, in fact... Well, you're over there
in the 70s and 80s. Here in the United States,
the obesity and the problems
didn't really come through. After chicken nuggets,
the McChick nuggets came out.
I think maybe it started in the late 80s,
90s, 2000s. That's where you started
seeing a lot of the problems
creeping up.
70s and 80s, 60s, it was not like that.
The health is...
It's not the same as it is
Europe as it is in the United States.
It's from the point that... I know they eat
shit food too. But it's
different because the FDA
passes certain
ingredients that we're allowed to put
in our food for preservatives
that they won't allow in
Europe. Do they allow
things over there that we don't have over here?
No.
I mean, we can have everything over here.
How do we know this? I mean, we should
reverse look at this. Well, that's what
our case is trying to push. He's trying to say
we need to... Look, these guys
are in office and they're
not in office. They've got people in their backpack.
Let's put in Pertude Chicken, for example.
Big egg, big egg, big
farmer, big big big big big big. No, I'm not saying that
there's not a problem with our food over here.
Because there is. And the chicken nugget program.
My problem comes from saying that Europe is better
than America. Yeah, you want to find that
there's food this is better. You want something that proves that.
I need proof that shows me that
the European food,
just because I can't buy it over there doesn't mean there's not
something else over there that's just as bad.
Again, I'm going to bring up
this point because you're right.
The food, if you just take it as this, I
have a bratwurst here in the United States
and I have a bratwurst in
Europe. The bratwurst in Europe, even
though they're both unhealthy for you,
the bratwurst in Europe has less chemicals
in it because their FDA won't allow
those chemicals to be in there. While our FDA
says, ah, fuck it, man, it's okay.
I just got a. Do they have the
big mass produced over there like we do over here?
Like Oscar Mayer and
Tyson. I would have to. Otherwise they can't
feed their people. I would assume.
You know what? At some point it's a
study where it says here's a bratwurst.
You're probably right. Right. So
but I'd rather I like to see that
where this brat that I brought,
this is a mass produced one over in Europe.
That's produced in Europe.
They want to suppress that type of information.
I don't know if I'm right over here.
What are they all? I mean, you know, when
when a company's trying to be healthier
with like with hot dogs and stuff, they say
there's no something. Nitrates.
Nitrates. Right. So that's a curing agent.
So that's an example. Right. Maybe Europe
doesn't allow nitrates.
Right. I don't know. I don't know. I just.
That's a curing agent. I'm just. Well, that's a chemical.
Well, it's it's a certain kind of
chemicals. I mean, they've got like, you know,
50 vows
in in 100.
One word impossible to say.
Polycarbonate, nitro, glycerin, whatever,
just to know I agree 100%
that there's problems with
the American food. But I go back
to how
has it impacted life
and life expectancy
because our life expectancy outside
the last couple of years has increased.
Right. Anxiety.
You know, the lack of
sleep, you know,
I'd be kind of interested to find out
what the ratio of people
or the comparison between
with people that have like sleep apnea machines
in the United States versus Europe, you know,
I'm troubled right now.
I woke up
fucking early like five o'clock in the morning
the other day, you know, and I was like, yeah, because I went to bed a little bit earlier, whatever.
I got up and I was like, what the fuck am I doing
up? So I went downstairs because I'm just staring.
I'm just looking at the ceiling. So I was like, I fucking I might as well start the day.
So I went downstairs and
turn the TV on and
laid down on the couch and I fell asleep
downstairs
and I woke up like three times.
Right. You know, and it's just like, am I awake?
It's just like, it was frustrating
me because I feel like I can't sleep
without my sleep apnea machine.
Right. And it's just like, you have a bad case.
I think you have something going on internally
in your nose, your esophagus
or whatever that is that's causing that.
It's caused by bratwurst.
Whatever it is.
I'm just kind of curious if there are
if that issue is
with those people over there in Europe.
Do they have sleep apnea issues?
I think that's a physical thing for you.
Like for me, it was weight related because I don't
snore like I used to. I think for you
even when you weren't heavy like
you say you are now, you were still
snoring like that. I think there's something
internally this physical that's causing
that. I think a better list of food.
Yeah, a better list of tests is do you have
friends with horrible gas? Like in Europe
how many friends do they have
with legal gas? We have a good one right there.
We have friends with lethal, lethal gas.
Jeff will
and that's definitely a product of food.
Jeff will like leave burn marks.
It's true.
Our equivalent podcasters in Europe
they have like very clean gas.
And I go back to your comment about lack of sleep
and anxiety. I think a big difference
between Europe and us
is work.
Right. I agree with that.
They have a much better balance.
They have a better balance of work. I'm not saying everybody
over there but in general Europe has a better
balance of work life. Oh yeah.
Where they're not stressed to the gills.
Way more vacation. Like. And they're expected
to stay away for two weeks. Yeah.
Three weeks. So when you wake up
early it could be work related Sean.
You know you're sitting there and you're like
fuck I got this thing I gotta do. I used to wake up.
Stress. Stress is the biggest thing guys.
That's not food related. No, no, no. Stress.
Stress is the biggest thing that affects
health, affects sleep, it affects
everything. It affects
binge eating, binge drinking.
It's all stress. I think
that's why a lot of the young folks
today are trying
to force that
balance where we've never had it
before. Not really. They want to work
four days a week. They want to
work from home. They don't want to
be burdened by
what we or
their parents have been burdened with. I don't blame
them for trying. I mean I think
you know. I mean we're late in the game. It's not going to
impact us.
Yeah, we're screwed. I mean there's certain professions
that will never happen.
But
I think that's a big difference in the culture
between Europe and
America is the work.
Yeah. The intensity.
The work intensity. Right.
There's some food differences as well. And I think
even the bigger study would be looking at Asian
countries and their food compared to what we eat
because they live the longest.
And they have super high stress
jobs. Like Japanese and shit.
Well the Japanese. They live
for a long time. Yeah. That doesn't make sense.
Well maybe that's food related.
I don't know. Maybe they eat a bunch of fish.
I don't know. Right. Well I would say the Asian
Asian
culture
envelopes a lot of exercise.
You know they go out there and
line dance. Have you ever seen those
folks? Tai Chi.
Well whatever it is. I mean yeah I don't know what it's
called. But I mean that's normal thing. They go out
there and they get out the park and there's
like 50 people all kind of doing some.
Is it like kind of like
Tai Chi. Remember Gun Ho. Well that's Tai Chi
but there's also little line dancing.
Like where. Country line dancing.
Something similar. I think it's more
yoga kind of like kind of like Gun Ho. The movie
Gun Ho remember. There's both. Yeah.
They started their day every day with like
exercises. That's kind of like your Tai Chi stuff.
I'm kind of an understanding.
But that's what I'm kind of talking about. When they go
out there there's like a little dance. You know
they're all doing their own dance at their own
style. I'm just saying they take
breaks to them all the day.
Yeah. That's what I mean. You know it's
developed in the business model. In the
culture here in the United States it's balls
to the wall. Yeah. Fucking work.
Until you die. Until you die basically.
I'm going to put that on my calendar. Line
dancing from 11 to 1130.
Yeah. Yeah. And just kind of.
You doing it though. Yeah just me at home.
Line dancing by myself.
Right. Those guys are really just
meditating. You know there's something
we said about that. I don't really do it.
I mean. Yeah. I think meditation.
Click on that second from the left picture.
I think that. That kind of
meditation would be what I would
want to do. Just because she's.
Yeah. She's very juggy. Is that why.
What. What's the picture you're looking at.
I was trying to put in there nude.
All nude meditation.
Actually that one down there on the
rise. She's got some poker's.
Oh God.
I want to tell a story about.
I want to tell.
God. What. I want to tell a story about
Chick-fil-A. I know we're kind of.
We went away off of that.
The fries are good. Yeah. No.
OK. So I want to tell you a story about
the grilled chicken nuggets.
OK. Not a fan.
I know. I'm not either. I'm not either
at all. Right. And so we get
like a 12 pack of them and like it was
supposed to be split between my son and
my wife and they didn't eat them all. And so
they were six or eight of them left and
she put them in a purse. OK.
And then we went to the mall.
And then we were shopping. Right. The whole family
shopping. We're all milling around. And then
like all the boys start like
accusing each other of like farting.
And I'm like we guys
talking about it. It's like get away from
me. I didn't do anything. It wasn't me.
It wasn't me. That kind of shit. Right.
And so we're still milling around looking at clothes
and I'm over by Shelley and I'm like, damn.
I go, Shelley, did you fart? Like what the hell.
And she's like, no, I didn't.
And then we all kind of figured out that it
was mom was thinking mom was thinking bad.
And finally we figured out
it was the damn grilled nuggets in her purse, man.
Really? It's
wreaked. It
wreaked. Of asshole? It just
wreaked. I don't know how to explain it. Did you send us
a picture of chicken asshole last week?
Oh, I did. Smell awful.
I didn't realize that was a delicacy. I didn't
neither. That's disgusting.
What you sent was disgusting.
It's a cultural food.
We have to have respect for that.
Yes. It was the anus and
surrounding area of a chicken and they bit into it
like a corn dog. It was
so freaking gross.
I mean, it's like grizzle. It's like what
I pulled out of my Asian soup.
It's like the elephant four scan.
What the fuck was that all about?
That may be what the Chick-fil-A grilled nuggets are.
It's chicken anus
because it was fucking horrible.
And we threw it away and we were like, uh-uh,
never again. If you eat it there,
eat it there and then be done. It's not coming
home ever.
It was so bad. I'm telling you. It's a family
story. It's awful.
Well, I encourage everyone to stop going to
fast foods and, you know.
I don't want to cut it out completely, but I know
it's horrible for you, but
once a week, once a week's good.
I don't even do that.
Everything in moderation, right?
If you do it every day or
something like this, even these guys who's like,
I'm going to live 30 days on McDonald's.
Well, he just died, as a matter of fact.
Well, but you heard, but you hear the story
about that. He was an alcoholic.
Well, they're not saying he died from
McDonald's. I know, but no.
But when, when he was doing the McDonald's
thing, the Super Size Me or whatever it was,
and he talked about like the
liver failures and different health
problems, he was a full-blown alcoholic.
And they never, they never
disclosed that.
I was like, come on, bro. That's not a fair
comparison.
Yeah, but that's
crap. You know, you can't
eat that food. Yeah, whatever, man.
I mean, it's good. It really is.
But I will tell you that
we, that I,
you know, when I haven't eaten a hamburger
in a long time and I go to specific,
like I, like I can't go to McDonald's.
Like if we say, hey, let's go get McDonald's right now,
I'll gross out because it's like
something about that and Burger King.
I can eat water burger. I mean, because
water burger still has a good taste to it.
Yeah, but the other ones, it's like I
taste the grease a little different.
I've been told that McDonald's
is the gold standard of
food quality. So I don't
know, because we were dogging it. You know, we were like all,
you know, God, you know,
we had pink slime, pink slime
shit. A person
who is very
much in the food industry
and like, and they know
what, including their french fries. So they know
what the gold standard is in terms of
like the way they prepare the food,
the way they, where they get the food, where it's sourced from,
like the whole end to end process.
McDonald's is supposed to be
tight. This is the hamburgers
that will last in a closet for 30 years.
I know you're saying that. I'm just, I'm
telling you, it was first-hand knowledge
of people that like know
who is good at doing this.
It just sounds like
some shifty left-handed
mind control. I mean, meaning, meaning, you know,
they care about where it comes from. So the potatoes
are grown on
farms that they make sure this and this
and this and they, and the meat comes
from, you know, cows that are this and this
and this. I mean, McDonald's
takes it seriously. Well, I know when I was working
McDonald's, I mean, I was 16 at the time,
but the hamburger looked like
hamburger. Right. It didn't look
any strange. Yeah, they didn't come, you didn't
squeeze it out of a tube and some weird. No,
they came in, although they're frozen, frozen.
Right. They're just patties, right? It makes
sense logistically, right? Yeah.
But, you know, I did have a big
like the American cheese and like I told
you this, that
opened up a brand new one and I was laying the cheese down
on the cheeseburger or whatever the hell I was doing.
I got about 10 slices
in. There's a fly.
Looks like it's like a fly
flew in right smashed in there between
two slices about 10 slices in.
That's inevitable. You know, it's just flying
all the way goes. Yep.
Right in between them. I think it's inevitable
that there's I mean, could people freak out?
Oh, there's this, that, and oh my God, it
must be so. Right. It must be so
like unsanitary and like, dude,
just critters. I mean, you can't
you can't keep them all out, right? I mean,
I don't know. Well, one of the things
I want to kind of, because I think we talked
about this is the strange
things since we're kind of talking about food,
we should probably do this on a thing,
the strange things in food,
but strange things in the beauty
products. Oh, yeah.
Because that
whole
business
is creative, creative on how
they use stuff. Yeah.
And there's a list up there
and it's based on history, history and
trial and error. Yeah, I think it's the third
tab up there, Mr. Producer, 10
bizarre ingredients in beauty products
and yeah, that's crazy.
There you go. So
you know, they use
used to hear that a lot of
would be like whale fat and stuff like
that. You know, stuff in lips, lipstick
is some weird stuff. But now that
they're coming out with all these things to, you know,
smooth out your skins and
D.A.G.U. and so well, how do you think they do that?
Right. Right. So
one of them I saw was a B
venom. Right.
This was fact checked by Darcy
Heikinen. Oh, good.
Good. Good. We need that. Yes.
So B venom.
So you want smoother skin in just
28 days. Is that called
rodeo? Rodeo
could help you achieve that with their B
venom super serum. Nice.
Yes. So anyway, I guess
it's smooth and has anti-inflammatory
and stuff like that. But
how do they get the B venom?
Do they like pull up a little
Yeah. Have you ever had a B
sting you and you pull the B off you
and it leaves a little sack and it keeps pumping.
It's really kind of sad. They torture
thousands, millions of bees.
But who has that job? Yeah, they're
squeezing B venom. Yes. This little B
pustules.
It's very
time consuming. They take one bee at a time,
put it under a microscope, have little
tweezers and they squeeze out that one. And they say
next. I mean, squeeze out that one.
That is kind of... It's very time consuming.
Well, you know what? I'm thinking
what they do is they probably take
like 10,000 bees. Just smash them.
And they just put them in this
thing and just mulches the shit out of them.
And then it becomes
multi-layer and the oil separates.
Yep. It's kind of like distillation.
Still on animal
excrements while bees produce honey.
They also produce the bee... What was I
going to say?
There you go. Applying the toxin
forces the blood
to rush to your face,
stimulating your skin to naturally produce
collagen and
elastin for a smoother
complexion. That's insane.
So you're literally triggering
a reaction.
So what if you're allergic
to bees? You die. Your face pops up.
You throw clothes up
and you're dead within minutes. Your penis
just gets
engulfed with blood and it pops
and you bleed to death. Wait a second. What now?
That doesn't sound like a bad thing.
Paul's going to start rolling around on the
daisies with his penis. Sting me, bitch!
Sting me, bitch!
Wow!
Okay. He's just running around
in the clover field.
Just banging the bees.
Did you put honey all over it?
This is officially
the second half.
What's our next one? A big old
flume of pollen
coming off your pecker.
Snail mucus.
How do you like
to be the guy that collects this stuff?
Snail mucus
also known as snail musin
or slime is an ingredient in several beauty
care products that helps smooth wrinkles again.
There we go. It's all about wrinkles and damaged skin.
It also
tightens the pores. It improves
skin elasticity
and provides optimal
hydration. Anal
electricity. Yes. Hippocrates
was reportedly crushing snails for skin
issues as early as 400 B.C.
Oh, there we go.
How do they prove that?
Well, thank God they didn't go extinct.
That's similar to a facial.
Right.
Alright, what's next? Alright.
Landolin.
Landolin. Oh, that's beavershit, isn't it?
No, landolin is used to treat, prevent dry, itchy skin.
Landolin is wax secreted
by wool-bearing animals.
Oh. Better known as
wool fat.
So sheep. Yeah.
There are domestic sheep breeds that are specifically raised
for their wool to be
used in beauty products.
Interesting.
Yes. So you're putting it on wool
fat juices. It works well on
chapped lips. So is that like
chapstick? Yeah, like chapstick.
Good Lord. I don't know.
It penetrates, apparently.
Oh, God.
Really? The next one is foreskin.
You know, that's interesting.
I remember Sandra Bullock
on the Ellen Show. That's right.
She mentioned somewhere.
We do not need to pull that video up again.
But, you know, Ellen called her out.
So aren't you like injecting foreskin
into your, your, your face?
That's, she was like, yes.
Well, there's probably a shitload of foreskin
out there, right? I mean, how many babies are circumcised
every day? That's what it says.
It says one of the more bizarre ingredients found in beauty
products is foreskin.
To be exact, fibroblast cells
are harvested from the circumcisions
of infants. Rose.
Hey.
This is body part type of shit, man.
That's not good. Tissue from circumcision
is sent to labs where the nutrients
are extracted. Rose. Again, how do you want
that job? Here's a pile of
wiener skins. Yeah, play with that.
Squeeze it.
Coming back from lunch break.
All right. I gotta squeeze out
more of these things. Are you done with the
bees? I got
foreskin to work out.
It's all the same lab, isn't it? Yeah, no shit.
All right. What's our next one?
Ostrich egg yolk.
What's the message about that? Oh, God.
There's a picture of a woman just putting the entire
yellow egg yolk all over her face.
What's what's what about the
ostrich? The egg of an ostrich is the
largest.
Delicious.
It is found in serums,
moisturizers and other cosmetic. It's just
because of this. All the antimicrobial
properties of the egg yolk can also work against acne.
Oh, God.
It is rich in nutrients and the
extraction process separates from the yolk
of the egg. So what is it? Is it just because
it's big? Since it's much larger than a chicken,
it contains a much higher amount
of nutrients.
Wonderful.
Using ostrich egg yolk is considered safe,
but consumers should demonstrate caution
when first using it in case of an
allergic reaction. I'm really
worried we're going to start getting to some sort
of semen excretion from animals
as probably going to be next.
We'll see. And then how would you like
that job? I mean, it's just the same.
It's all an excretion. It's a bodily
fluid from
an insect or an animal, regardless.
Right. Yeah, true.
All right. What's next? But I don't want to give a monkey
a hand job.
Okay.
Sound bite? That's just sound bite.
Yes.
Crystal ice plant.
I've never heard of that.
What is this one?
Crystal ice plant. Okay. Never heard of it.
Yeah. Oh, unique looking.
Yeah. The mesobaranthium.
So it's just a plant.
Okay. Does it
freeze?
What's so special about it? Yeah, what does it say
here? It's a succulent plant,
flowering plant covered in glistening
water vesicles.
That's the name.
That's very erotic. It could survive in
the Saharan climate due to its ability to
reserve water. So basically there's something in the plant
that, uh, there's nothing weird about
that. No. It's just a plant.
Except it's maybe rare or some
little.
Black crystal ice plant pressed
serum contains 63% crystal
ice plant extract along
with other ingredients.
So I bet it's kind of like, um,
some of the stuff you'd pull out of a rubber
plant. I would have envisioned.
Or an aloe plant? Perhaps.
Yeah. Maybe.
I mean, that's what all the oils are. Essential oils.
I mean, there's all these million different ways
they collect the oils from plants, right?
Right. Right. All right. What's next?
All right. Salmon.
Salmon.
Salmon and other marine fish
are rich in compounds such as
proteins and peptides.
They're using products due to their
antioxidant and anti-aging. They're
utilized, blah, blah, blah.
One ingredient used to help exfoliate the skin
is salmon egg enzymes.
Yeah. You know, they're all
back down to the little, uh,
you know, these infant
things, whether they're eggs or
infants,
foreskin, it's all, you know,
stem cells. Is that next?
It also says salmon sperm
has also recently made its way into the
cosmetic industry. There we go.
Any formulas and anti-aging products. I told you.
They use the enzyme of the sacs.
Yes. Or the baby, the, it's like the placenta.
Yes.
How they collect that?
They got little, they got a salmon
porn farm and they just kind of
Geez. You have a salmon milker?
Yeah.
They make a fake copper river and it's trying to
swim up the river.
I'm going to get there.
Quick, whack it off.
I don't think that's how they do it.
They die. No.
Well, that's what they do. They race up the river
then they spawn, right?
Well, they lay their eggs. They lay their eggs
and then they die. That's what they do.
They all get up there, they lay their eggs
and then the male will go over there and
chica chica chica over there. Well, a lot of them
they like jump out of the river trying to swim up
screaming. They fly right into a bear's mouth.
That's correct. Now that happens.
Talk about the easiest meal ever.
They just stand there waiting for the fish to jump
into their mouth. Hello.
I can imagine the bird, the poor fish.
She's like, fuck.
I made it all this way and now this. God damn it.
It's almost there.
You a**hole.
I was about to get lucky. Dude.
Let's go ahead from sex.
I don't think, well, they lay their eggs
and then they die. They don't hang around.
This is where they're on their way up there. What do you mean?
They don't have like a, I don't think they have an old folks
home at the top of the river, river
cover or something. They don't have a post-coital
cigarette afterwards. Post-coital
cigarette? Are they having sex
when they get there? I thought they just lay
the eggs and then the male comes along
and does their thing. It's not like they're together.
Yeah. Well, I mean, she doesn't like
she's ever seen finding the female.
Do what? Jeff?
She like tickles it with the fin.
Tickle, tickle. Hey baby,
you're about to die. Let's get it on.
So bears are cockblocking salmon. Is that what?
Yes. That's exactly what they're
doing. Yeah. That's what they're doing.
All right. So this next one. Diamonds.
What the hell? How's that
good for the face? Diamond powder?
I can't.
I mean, that's just
I want to say stupid.
Diamond powder? A youthful glow.
How?
I don't get it. It's a diamond powder
and minerals. Maybe it clogs the pores.
It says it contains caffeine
to reduce the look of puffy eyes
and kelp to improve the look of these
skins at elasticity.
I don't know. Well, that means
there's a whole bunch of shit in this one. There's a
falcon seed extract and
that's the reach on that one. Yeah, it's all.
It's just mineral at that point.
Oh, it says the diamond powder
provides a photo luminescent.
Right?
So it really doesn't do anything except
make some sparkle. Make them sparkle.
Man, that's literally putting strontium
in your skin. Strontium. Yes.
There we go. All right. Number two.
Pig collagen.
Yeah. Collagen's always been a thing. I don't know
why pig is anything special. Porcine
collagen is a type of collagen
derived mostly from pig bones.
Skin and connective tissue.
Some of the good parts. Oh, yeah. Good part.
So its function is
to, well, smooth out the wrinkles
like everything else. Like everything else.
Reduce the size of the pores.
I don't know what that's going to do.
If you reduce the size of the pore,
then you're not going to break out as easy.
Yeah, it keeps it from shit getting into the pore.
Right?
So as we age, collagen production
is reduced, resulting in wrinkles and
sagging skin.
Yeah. So we need to put a bunch of
pig grease on our face. Yeah.
There we go. All right. That happens at the
90 anyways from eating 15 bags of
pork rinds. There you go.
Yeah. Natural. See who knew.
Who knew. I just rub it all over my cheeks
before I pop it in my mouth. There you go.
Perfect. All right. Last one.
Sound bite. Insects.
Are there bugs in your lipstick?
I'm sure the ladies are going to love this.
Oh, yeah.
There is one ingredient found in lipsticks,
lip gloss and eyeshadow that may surprise you.
Carmine is used in these products
to add bright red color
without using synthetic dyes.
Okay. Carmine is made from the dried
and crushed shells of female
coca-neal insects.
Oh, what kind of those?
I don't know what a coca-neal insect is.
They're harvested and dried before being ground
up to produce the dark red shade in a powder.
What kind are they?
Let's see what a coca-neal insect looks like.
Oh, look at that.
It's a little
dragonfly looking thing with a long tail.
Oh, that looks like a mite or something like that.
That's gross.
So
when you... That looks tiny.
It's like a candy. So when the ladies put red lips together,
they're putting insect carcass on their lips.
Yes.
You think they know that?
I don't think they care.
Yeah. Because it looks good. The color is so good.
Yeah.
That's gross. I hate...
I shouldn't use the word hate.
I don't like makeup.
I mean, I know makeup the women do and it makes
it look pretty, but at the end of the day, I can't stand lipstick.
I don't kiss because, you know...
I'm with you. There's lipstick.
I don't want any part of that, man.
You know, put on lip balm and all that stuff. Yeah, I'm out.
So many times I'll look at pictures, you know,
like, you know, like models or
celebrities and like
the ones that are just
totally decked out like cheerleaders.
Oh, yeah. Well, they
just look gross to me with all the makeup.
Well, some of they do that so you can
actually see their face from a distance.
That's why they put so much of that on.
But I agree with you if there's too much makeup,
actually some of these people, ladies
can change their entire
look. Yeah. They've ever seen those videos
nine day where you just see this
really wretched looking woman. Yeah.
And she puts this makeup on and she's a
knockout. Well, and to me,
I would also argue
that the opposite as well. You'll see
somebody just caked on makeup and you're like, God,
it's like, and then you'll see
them natural. Yeah. And you're like, damn,
really good looking. Why
why is she wearing all that shit? You know,
yeah, you know, the famous, not famous,
you know, one of the the same as I always
remember when I look at things like that, I was like, well,
God makes women beautiful. The devil makes
them pretty. And I think
I subscribed to that.
That's a clever little saying. I think
it's important.
It does horrible shit to you.
I don't know. I'm not a fan of it.
I know women have to have it because they
need to look and do whatever it is.
But in my opinion, it's like
less is more when it comes to makeup.
Julie doesn't wear much makeup and when
she does, she doesn't wear a lot
of it. Like heavy
wise, she'll just lipstick girl, little eyeshadow.
That's about it. Just wear a lot of it.
I remember being, I had a girl that I was kind of
chasing in middle school
and she was wearing just
way too much makeup and it looks almost
silly. Did she wear
a Coocaniel insect lipstick? I'm pretty sure
it was. Did she go poop in a cat box
and wear little cat ears?
She was not a furry.
She was not a furry. But she had way too
much blush and way too much her
eyeshadow was crazy. Was mom like, you're
staying away from that, Hussey.
I don't remember my mom
saying that. No.
I was like, I was like, where'd it go, boy?
But she was such a pretty girl and I
told her, I said, do me
a favor. You know, like, you know, it was
a flirting time, right? I said
come to school with nothing but eyeliner
because I love eyeliner. I think eyeliner
is a badass kind of
makeup. That's my favorite makeup, right?
And so she did,
just for me, she came to school with
nothing but eyeliner and I thought she looked
amazing. Did you tell her? I did.
And we dated for
a short time. Well, I mean like a week.
You know how middle school, oh yeah,
I was like, damn, we lasted a week.
Anyway, middle school dating was always
a joke but
yeah, it was fun.
And you know, and now
we were down in Mexico,
we were down in Mexico and we met all
these couples
that have like a time share down there,
right? So they all knew each other already and
somehow Alan got us into this, the exclusive
part of the resort, whatever.
Anyway, now I met this one girl and she
had eyeliner on
and I was like, how does it not
run? And she was kind of embarrassed
to say, but it was a tattoo.
Oh yeah, a lot of people, a lot of the ladies do that.
That's popular. That was new to me.
They do a tattoo
around the exterior of the lip
to make the lip line kind of show
a little. Yeah. And they do the around
the eyes and supposedly it's
super painful.
She did say it was really painful.
She did say that and she was very regretful.
Really? She was so regretful.
Yeah, because it's like you never can change it
because when you're normal, like when I
know this lady in
Miss Watson and she
had done it and when
you would go, I went to her house to
do construction stuff and when you
show up there, you kind of like, she's not wearing
any makeup and you're like, but yet she's got
an outline around her mouth and I'm kind of like
it looks like, you know, a coloring book that hasn't
been filled in yet. Right.
Just got an outline, yeah. Yeah, so I can understand
that we're regretting it because it's kind of like, man
because there comes a point where you're kind of like, I want to look normal.
Right. You know, I want to, where is that natural
look? Right. I've done wearing lipstick.
I don't want to wear it. Oh, I forgot.
I got this shit around my lips. I have to wear it.
Like forever. Yeah. Right.
So maybe around the lips isn't very cool.
I could see the eyes. I'm a huge fan.
I do like the eyes. I like
eyeliner. Yeah, the eyeliners, it's just
it just looks
sexy. It does. I tried
to make her feel better. She was like
getting almost kind of teary-eyed about
how she wish she hadn't done it. I was like, well,
you know, if it makes you feel better, you look great with the eyeliner you do.
I'm an eyeliner guy anyway.
Yeah. You know, so anyway,
I felt bad for her because she was like, she
she hadn't done it. And what are you going to do?
Laser that shit off? I guess you are, right? You should
show your penis. You can use some anal.
I mean, you probably rub some piece of it. Oh, that would make her feel better.
Yeah. Oh, I didn't go that route.
I didn't go that route, Jeff,
but thank you for that. Let's you feel bad for you.
Let's you feel bad for you.
I'm so sorry. Yeah, I know. I'm so regretful
that I got it reduced this much.
I had it. I should have left it big like
like it was natural.
We can go to the store and pick up a little
rambican of anal bleaching cream
and rub it on your your eyes and it'll
probably get rid of that.
It'll probably make you blind too. Get that your eyeball.
I don't know. Bleaching cream.
How do they get rid of the tattoos? Oh, they laser.
Laser. Laser. Oh, laser. Holy shit.
I don't know if I want a laser. Look at that close to my eye.
No shit. But I guess if it's like, you know,
they have your head like totally secure
and you have a machine doing it, I guess so.
You know, here's the thing. Just don't do it.
What do they call that? Laser? Not etching.
Laser removal. Laser removal.
Later tattoo removal. Tattoo removal.
It burns it off, I think. Like underneath the skin.
Have you ever seen the transition
that there was this guy that was completely
tatted up his whole face, his head,
his neck and they show a progression
like multiple times he had to go back
and he had to go back and he had to go back
and he had to go back multiple times.
He had to go back multiple times. He had to go back
and he had to laser that shit off, right?
Because then he was no longer in a...
Did it take everything off? Like you couldn't see it at all?
Yeah, on his face, yeah. That's good.
Yeah, and he was like in a gang
and he had a really checkered past
and now he was married with two kids
and he just wanted to get rid of all that stuff
and it was fascinating to see the progression.
There's probably a laser in there. Of the picture.
Yeah. See if they show up here.
I think if I could find the right one
I'd get me a tattoo on the shoulder
but then I always think,
what if I find...
These would be something special to me for one thing.
But then I'm like, in 10 years
would I be pissed off when I had it?
I don't know.
That's kind of what... Mr. Proofs just pulled this up
where they're showing before and after.
There's actually a couple.
If you scroll down that little green dragon on there,
see right there that some of them just fade out.
So maybe you need like several applications.
I do. No, you absolutely need
multiple applications.
I mean, look at the guy on the neck.
That looks great. Yeah.
I mean, he's got a full on neck.
You can still see, it looks like he's got some birth marks.
Plus you can see the chicks nostrils
or eyes or whatever that is.
Yeah, that's true. God.
Yeah, mine... See, I have one on my back
and it needs to be
touched up, right?
And then nowadays, they can turn those
into something else.
They turn yours into a bigger pizza pie.
Which is exactly
what I was thinking. That's amazing.
Just a big pizza? Yeah.
No, just one big slice.
I want like a pepperoni with some banana
pepperoni or something.
It's kind of like a sun, right?
Yeah, it's...
I mean, it's around and stuff.
But the thing is, it was from 2005.
Right? So I mean, it's
really old.
So technology is horrible back then.
The United States has faded.
So, I mean, tattoos don't last that long.
You have to touch them up.
Yeah, you can go in there and say,
cover this with something that they'll manage to do
and change it into something really different.
Yeah, and make it a slice of pizza.
Like with Chambas.
Yeah, it could be like a big pizza pie, yes.
Well, you know, I don't know.
Dude's face on the right, Hispanic gentleman.
Pretty good one right there.
Yeah, I mean, they did a good job removing it.
And you can only imagine how painful that was
to see it.
I've never understood the face tat.
Yeah, I mean, come on, boy.
How short-sighted do you have to be
to think that you want a face tat
for the rest of your life?
I know. I don't get it.
I mean, I see these singers like Post Malone.
That dude
looks like an idiot to me.
Yeah, he's got so many tat.
All this shit all over his face.
He's going to want all that stuff taken off at some point.
Oh, yeah, he doesn't look healthy for one thing.
Yeah, he was on that.
We look at that.
Yeah, it's crazy.
He's got all sorts of shit going on.
It doesn't impress me very much.
Although Mike Tyson kind of,
he was kind of one of the first ones.
Oh, the spider.
The pop spider web.
Well, it's like a tribal type of thing.
At least it looks like to me.
Oh, yeah, it kind of curls around.
It's out of his face.
I mean, he's got words underneath eyeball
and it's across his forehead.
And he seems to be doing more, more of it, not less.
He may be happy with it.
Yeah, obviously he is.
No shit.
Post Malone did lose a lot of weight.
And so people were asking, did he lose it
using ozempic?
And he's, what are you saying?
No, no, no. I mean, we've talked about that before.
Ozempic face or whatever, right?
Yeah, well, he claims that he didn't lose.
He lost way through the old fashioned way
by just eating right and exercising.
Yeah, those epic causes lots of problems.
There's some lawsuits going on out there.
Yeah.
Because of stomach paralysis.
How'd you like to have that?
No, I didn't sound good.
No.
Yeah, look at the ozempic face.
It's just.
Well, they also remove the bucle fat.
That's what Debbie Moore has.
You ever see her face where she looks like
she's all in like Skeletor.
They pull out all this fat right here.
Yeah.
They're staring at you like, oh my God.
He opens our mouth.
She's like, I'll get you. Hey, man.
Look at that picture right there where she's
look at her face.
Doesn't even look right.
But they move all that fat.
I think it's called the bucle fat or something like that.
It looks stupid.
I wonder if they fixed it because she's got
some really pretty pictures in there.
I think that was before her.
I don't know.
So basically what they look like they did,
they took the sides of her cheeks and they tucked it in.
So she's always got that like you're sucking
in your cheeks all the time.
I think they sucked the fat out is what they did.
I hate that they just, I know we've talked about this
before, but the fact that they think that they need
to do this is like, damn it, man.
Just embrace your beauty.
Embrace your natural look.
I just hate it. And then they do all this crazy shit.
Yeah. And then they regret it.
All of them have to regret it after a while.
I mean, it's just, you would think so.
Yeah. Yeah, whatever.
Yeah, but once you have all those plastic surgeries,
you really don't go back.
No, you can't go back and you don't look the same like Meg Ryan.
Have you seen the picture of Meg Ryan? It's awful.
Yeah.
She was so beautiful. What number is this?
This is seven or eight.
I don't know. Yeah, we have a new bourbon
that we've never tried before.
We have another version of this.
We have a, this is
the newest little book.
I tell you what, the first sip off of there,
it took me back.
I was like, wow, that's different.
This is a little book. What did you say?
What version is it?
Well, the latest one, 2024, which is this one?
Is the chapter eight, little book chapter eight.
Yes.
And what's it say about it?
Yeah, what's our proof here?
I can't read that at all.
It's probably Jim Beam, I know that.
And it's a, it's a
sought after, oh yeah, it's a huge blend.
This blend is made from
18 year, Kentucky straight bourbon whiskey.
It's a high rye, an 11 year
straight rye whiskey,
a seven year straight rye
malt whiskey, a five year
rye whiskey, five year
and a five year
So it's a super blend.
It's good.
I love the way they, they, they
went with the different of five year
Kentucky rise. There's a char four,
a char one.
And you know, they got the, what is the K?
K. Why is that Kentucky and then Pennsylvania?
Is that what that is? What is that?
Pennsylvania family, maybe family style
or maybe those are the type of
barrels where they came from.
Perhaps.
Maybe it's K. Why like the jelly.
I don't think you're sure K.
Why family style?
I think Jeff is right. I guess
I guess what I'm driving at is that
they, with that blend that they
have, and this is 118.2 proof.
That's right. 118.2.
And this, I mean
the blend is excellent. So look, I'm a huge
fan of char fours. I mean, I wouldn't
want one
particular
whiskey company
to subscribe
only doing char fours because I think it's a horrible idea
with yellow rose. But I mean outside of
that, I'm just
I'm thinking, you know, this is
excellent. I love the way they dabble in that.
Right. You know, and then once a char one, char four
and they just kind of throw it all over the place. It's got
a solid taste to it. I'm enjoying it.
This, when I first tasted it, we'll get to what
your first note was when you first tasted it.
When I first put, I took a sip of it.
I was, it was
almost tastes like a red hot to me.
Red hot cinnamon candy.
Lots of cinnamon. Yeah, I can do that.
Lots of cinnamon on it. I still pick it up.
I wasn't as intense as the very first sip.
But that first sip I picked up, like I said,
it was like a red hot candy.
That's got to be part of the char one.
I mean, the, that char one
that I think they have one or two of them in there.
Yeah.
And you said you taste
pickles. I did.
I picked up a hint of that. Yeah.
So when I took my first
sips, I didn't sip it. I took
a micro sip.
A small super sip.
I wanted to really dilute it with my
saliva to kind of break it down
without getting a big sip
and getting my tongue saturated.
And immediately I was pulled into a
pickle. I tasted pickle juice.
And I tasted, I totally
tasted a red hot such a refernt to.
It's a, it is a little spicy.
Yeah. I think that goes back to the cinnamon
taste. Yeah.
Little pepper. The 118 proof
kind of, it's not as
ethanol for being 118.2 proof. It doesn't burn
like a high alcohol.
I think the spice and the burn
is the, is the spice
of it. The rye. Cause this is a rye, isn't
it?
Because everything in there.
So Bruce Brutus says, you all have done this
bourbon before. This one's actually a chapter
eight. We've done a different one.
And the other one we did
before was a chapter seven. So
these are all rye whiskies except the
18 year old.
Which is a straight bourbon high
rye whiskey.
But everything else is a rye. So this is
essentially
a rye whiskey for the most part. Cause I'm
sure there's not a whole ton of that 18 year
in there.
I'd like to know a little bit more about, you
know, it says co-mingled by Freddie
No. Like what is that?
And recipe
14, 014
That's his blend.
That's his blend of 014.
Yeah. Co-mingled I think is just the word
blended. Blended.
This was blended by Freddie No.
Yeah.
118.2 is the proof.
And this is, this is good.
Again, I think the
rise, as we're getting into these
rise, it's introducing
a lot of different
palettes, different
flavor profiles. You know, this one has
a lot of cinnamon in it. We had the, that
was a wheat one though. That wasn't a rye though.
But the, the rise
seemed to bring out
some different flavors
than our standard bourbons. Yeah, definitely.
I, so
I've been kind of hesitant
to weigh in here. So
I, I appreciate
how rich it is. It is extremely
rich. It is exploding with flavor.
Is it my favorite?
No.
It's not my favorite. Well, walk us
through what you're tasting.
I, uh,
what you, what the colors,
what do you taste smelling?
Well, I mean, uh,
but the color
is, I just feel like it's a deep
copper with golden undertones
and I got to,
let me think about the aroma. Oh my
God. It's got a dark, I think it's a complex
blend of, blend of
butterscotch and fresh dill
and though maybe, uh,
no dill. Oh, and
dill, it's your pickles. And toasted,
uh, yeah, no, I, I
wouldn't be able to come up with all that shit, but
uh, yeah, you're welcome to read that.
They got the blend of the butter, butter,
fresh dill and toasted rice. So dill, like you said,
was something that we had, uh, we had
kind of figured out the toasted, rye bread,
obviously the butterscotch, which I think is tied
into the red hots that you were referring to.
Right. You know, and the floral notes,
uh, the taste is for floral notes intermingled
with sweet stonefruited apricot
and heavy oak with it. And yeah,
heavy oak.
And you added stone fruit. Well, sweet apricot
is a stone fruit. Yeah.
So I wanted to, yeah, you just had to throw
that in there. Well, it's a stone fruit.
We were,
yeah.
So I, um, like
I said, I, it, it
just drips with flavor, right?
Super rich. Super deep.
I don't think it's, I don't think
it's your palate, what you like.
Lots of things popping out of it, but man,
I would tell you, I would pick
many others.
Okay. Here's the thing.
I go over to a friend's house and he's like,
Hey man, I want you to try this. I would enjoy it.
I enjoy this. There's nothing wrong with this.
Now, is this
the bottle I would want to have for myself
on a, on a Sunday
evening and where it's cool outside
and I want to pour a glass and I want to
enjoy it? No.
I think this would be, I think this would be good on a cold
night. On a cold day.
Not in the hot. Yeah.
This falls into a category
very unique of, there's
a time and place for everything. Right. Yeah.
Cold night. This one works.
You know, when we collect these
and we talk about these, we're not
interviewing these to
be our, our main go-to
bourbons. Right. I think
it's, it's something that's a weapon I want in the arsenal for
sure. I mean, it's wonderful. It's
desirable and I want to have it because
I wouldn't mind having this on a cold night.
And it's, and it is fascinating
to taste. Sitting in your backyard
fire going. Oh yeah. But it's
so, it's so fascinating to taste how
different all these can be. Right. Especially
blends. Right. We would expect blends to be
to, to have more diversity
and flavor than we would,
you know, or straight. Right. You know what, it's funny
you mentioned that. And I'm kind of curious
if we were to take
some of these bourbons and whiskies
and make
a cold and
see what that does to the flavor.
I, it would definitely
change the experience. But you're saying like put
the bottle in the freezer. Perhaps
just the fact that you're saying. Like they do vodka, right? They do that for vodka.
Yeah. And it makes a little bit more
smoother and it makes a little bit easier.
It's, it, there's more of a transition.
Yeah. And you get. It softens it.
No question about it. It softens the initial
impact to your tongue. But I think
with it being in the freezer
and it coming out when it hits your tongue
you have a kaleidoscope of,
it's a transformation. Right. Is what it is.
Because you get different notes, the different
levels of temperature that it hits. I don't know.
Maybe that's why you're saying it tastes better in the cold.
I'm thinking, all right, well, there's some merit to that
because I could sip my glass outside
sometimes and put it in the cold
and I like it.
And it may try that. Maybe, maybe not
with this one. Maybe I, we take a bottle
and I'll stick it in the fridge
or the freezer. See what we think.
And that'll be our pregame. Let me ask you a question.
Let me have some sort of dry ice
infusion process. Can we get one of those up here
in the podcast? Oh, absolutely.
I'm sure one of our sponsors will spring for that.
How about one of those whirlpools? You can stick it in there
for two minutes and it's cold. Oh, nice.
Yeah, let's see that. We also need
a corn dog maker.
And a big popcorn machine right there. Yes.
We've got that and we've got
a hot dog maker.
You ever, you guys, you guys ever see the one word?
Can we talk about how we went healthy
wearing hot dogs? Do you remember
the hot dog maker where it like, you put it
in there and there's like electrodes and it
electrified it? Yes.
Like a, you know, like what do you call it?
What's the chair? The potato.
What's the chair? The electric chair?
The electric chair. It basically
just, you know, frying these things
like that. Do you ever see that? It's called the hot
dogger. I think it's called the hot dogger.
I've also seen the one that looks like a toaster.
You put your buns in there and you
toast it and your hot dogs go down.
The hot dogger. Yes. The 1970s
hot dog electrocuter.
The hot dogger doesn't work. It's the hot dogger
in the 1970s.
It's hilarious.
We had one of those. Oh my god, we had one of those.
Anyway. I also want to see one of the
original hot doggers from the 1970s.
That was funny. It feels like, what is that
Carrie Carrie would do that? Yes. See, you
put it in the little, you do stick the ends
in there. So it's like a little
corn cob pins on either side of this
this plate.
Yeah. Sort of. And you're
electrocuted the shit out of them.
Oh, well. Yeah, but does it give it a nice
I don't know. Nice burn.
That's what we, we did have this
one. We had a different looking
one. But did it
cook it fine? Well, yeah. I don't know. We're
going to take a look. So they're going to pop this thing on here.
We ate them. What are we on here? We're
on a minute four,
25 of eight.
She's cooking right now. She's talking.
I see it steaming up
and oh look, there's like
the little dogs are gyrating
and blasting the underside
of the plexiglass condensation protective
cover.
Oh, yeah.
I think those things are well cooked.
Look at that. They split open. Oh, God.
Basically, you're just shocking the shit out of it.
Yeah, it's like some. So that's basically
what they do to prisoners, huh? Yes.
Yeah, but imagine the dudes on top. No, it's
exactly that in the dudes on top of
those doesn't look appetizing.
Those trains does those electric trains
that travel the countryside in some
third world country and you have some dudes
know those guys on top and they
stand up and they don't realize it and they just
graze one of those electric
lines and it's like blown up a thousand
volts from zero
to 10,000 degrees in a split second.
All right. I'm calling.
I have issue with her. She put ketchup on her hot dog.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
There's nothing wrong with catch up on a hot dog.
Agusting. No, that is
illegal and disgusting. It is not
at all. Catch up and hot dogs do that mix.
Well, hot dogs can mix with all sorts of
shit. You can do.
I agree and disagree.
Now, if I were to eat a hot dog with
by itself, mustard, mustard,
I do. I do.
I do mustard on one side and catch up on the
other. That's illegal.
No, no, that's my child.
And I challenge
now. I'm not going to get
red card on this. I do.
I do put hot. I do put ketchup.
If I set up
a like if I slice the hot dog
and I put a hamburger.
So if I put basically two hot dogs
and I fillet them butterfly them
open and I put them on top of a hamburger,
then I think it's okay to have
ketchup and mustard.
Well, the hamburger would help mask
the nasty hot dog
ketchup combination. Are you not a ketchup fan?
I love ketchup. It's just on hot dogs.
It does not work. There's something weird
about you. There's nothing wrong with
ketchup and mustard only. No.
Or I'm sorry, mustard only on hot dogs.
I'm kind of curious what happened to you.
Yeah, somebody. Yeah, that's definitely
a big seat. Raw hot dogs.
What frozen actually.
That's kind of like those,
you know, canned meat night. I used
to for those. Well, there's little things
I used to use. I didn't realize the
sausage. Yeah.
My mom used to tell me that I would hide
the hot dogs out just eat them frozen.
Come on, little Jeffrey, let's hide the
meat stick.
Oh, that's just fucking don't do it.
Don't worry about it. He eats it cold. Just give it to
him.
I know I went way.
How do we get on the hot dog?
Or because we were talking about things we want
in the podcast room.
Oh, that's right. Let's go back. Let's go back.
So vodka is something you stick in the freezer.
I think a lot of people do that.
Yeah, you're myster.
Freeze. It goes down a little bit smoother.
OK, I was going to say, so what else?
I mean, is
tequila something you put in the freezer?
You could. I mean, it can.
I mean, what do people like what's normal?
Well, what would this taste like out of
cube? I know that will water it down.
Oh, it tastes great.
Corjoles would be like
kluas,
Bailey's, schmops,
Bailey's has to be refrigerated.
So like dessert.
Dessert. By the way, that is not true.
What you just said, Bailey's Irish cream should
be refrigerated. That is not true.
It's supposed to be if you get the real
Bailey's Irish cream. I don't know what I'm saying.
It doesn't say it has to be refrigerated. I dumped out an entire bottle of
Buffalo Trace cream because
your wife said, oh,
it's spoiled. You should have refrigerated it.
That is not true. I should not have done that.
I wasted the whole bottle.
Yeah, it doesn't say because I always look.
They'll tell you if it has to be refrigerated. Yes.
The bottle. Yes. It's refrigerated after opening. That is not true.
All right. It says a bottle of Bailey's
needs to be kept in a place that can range
in temperature from 32 degrees
to 77 degrees.
So that is not true.
Everybody write that down. There you go. Dear listeners,
do not throw out your
Bailey's if you haven't refrigerated.
And it can last for two years, apparently. Yes.
Oh, God, it can last a lot longer than that.
Actually, it says the folks
over at Bailey's recommend that you consume
it within two years of purchase.
Sure. Notably, they say
this is for the optimal freshness
and know that you should store it between 25 degrees Celsius,
which is 32 to 75 degrees Fahrenheit.
Right. And definitely keep it out
of direct sunlight. If it's unopened,
it's fine.
If it's opened, it must be refrigerated.
No, it doesn't. It's not true.
It says it right there.
And these are from the Bailey's people.
Well, doesn't say that the bottle doesn't say it does.
I'll go downstairs and find go get the Bailey's.
It's got to be Bailey's.
I really, I really hope
I didn't throw out that Buffalo trace cream.
I don't know.
I don't think it's I think some of the other superior
inferior bottles of
I shouldn't call it inferior.
I think that they have alternate flavors in there
to give it that creamy substance to it.
Maybe I don't.
Maybe Bailey's actually has a milk or a dairy product in it.
Because I remember when I was
cream the course, if you didn't keep it refrigerated,
it would curdle.
And I remember I would take it
and some idiot would put it on the shelf
and I'm like, what's this doing? I pour it down there.
It's like, it's gross looking.
OK, I can totally respect that.
So put in cream.
Is it liqueur?
I guess it is liqueur.
Put in bourbon cream.
Bourbon cream opened.
And then let's figure out
if it really truly needs to be refrigerated.
I guess the answer is probably going to go.
Does buffalo trace bourbon cream go bad?
There you go. I had buffalo trace.
That's it. That's what I want.
Yes.
It can go bad, but its shelf life is relatively long.
OK, hold on. It's susceptible to spoilage,
especially if it's not stored properly.
OK, well, anything can go.
OK, how long can the cream last?
Six to eight months when stored correctly.
What affects the shelf life?
Let's see. Temperature exposure to light.
How well it's sealed.
OK.
Let's see here. Cool dark place away from direct sunlight.
Refrigeration is not necessary,
but it can help prolong its shelf life.
I dumped out a bottle.
All right, well, hold on. So I've got another one here.
The same search engine.
She should buy me a new bottle.
And it's hard to find, by the way.
Bourbon cream contains milk,
which leads to a few important considerations.
The first is that the bottle needs to be refrigerated
after opening to remain fresh.
Not what it says here.
Well, I mean, who do we believe?
Well, maybe, OK, hold on.
Maybe this thing is considered,
is thinking that you don't have to refrigerate it
because it's never been opened.
Well, no, I think it's set up there.
Did it say opened?
I never heard it say open. I've never said I'd read that.
That's critical. We need to know.
Can you scroll down, Mr. Producer?
We need to know if it's been opened or not.
All right, after the expiration date,
if it's gone bad, can it be frozen to extend to blah, blah, blah, blah, blah?
How should I store it?
It says it's not necessary to refrigerate it,
but it's not explicitly saying if it's been opened.
All right. Let me give you the meat of it.
If you drink it relatively quick,
like within a week or two,
maybe a month, I don't know how long.
I do know this.
I bartended in my life.
And we went through a lot of Bailey's Irish cream,
and so it didn't have a very long, from my experience,
it doesn't have a very long shelf life.
And when some bartender on the shift before me,
or maybe the night before me, left it on top of the bar.
You dumped it.
I poured it. I used it.
Thinking this stuff is still good.
And when I poured it from that Bailey's Irish cream bottle
into their drink, it was like, it was coagulated.
It was coagulated.
Well, do you have to shake it up?
You're going to break all those chokes apart.
Yeah, you got to shake it up.
I thought you were doing this.
You were flipping the bottles.
Even if you shake it up, it's like pouring cocoa puffs
with the chocolate marshmallows.
They float on the top.
That's what happens.
Then you take a fork and you bust up the bubbles.
No, it's not cottage cheese.
We scoop it off and pop it on top of your salad.
I will tell you what, I usually air,
because I'm worried about food anyway,
and being in the fridge.
I usually air on the side of caution.
You take it in the fridge.
Yeah, that's your best bet.
That's your best bet.
But I do look at the bottles sometimes.
If I don't have room, I'm like, can this sit out for a little bit?
You guys are right.
There are some out there you do not have to refrigerate.
And it's simply because they don't have dairy in them.
And Bailey's may be different,
because I usually don't have the Bailey's.
I got a bottle downstairs.
Those are mixed with seed oil to make it creamy.
Creamy seed oil?
It's true.
It could be a version of that.
Mr. Producer, click on the bourbon cream buffalo trace this story.
I want to hear it from the maker themselves.
Keep going down one more, right there.
Let's see what it says.
Yes, we are 21.
Chilled, yes.
Reviews, is it going to, it's probably not going to tell us
how to care for it.
No, it's not going to.
Okay.
Oh, customer care? No.
All right, never mind.
Oh, it just broke my heart because that's hard to find.
Buffalo trace cream?
We beat the shit out of this.
Look, I got to ask some questions.
I want to chat about, oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Producer, are you looking at me?
I was going to do hard right.
Hard right? Okay, very good.
How much time left?
I mean, I wanted to talk about the astronauts and Boeing
and SpaceX and the fact that we have six minutes.
Hell, man, let's do this fast then.
So, pull up SpaceX and the astronauts out there.
So, there's long story short, Paulico.
Well, Boeing, okay, so they launched there,
I forget what the name of their craft was,
but it was a very highly anticipated launch
because they've been waiting for them to get in the game.
Space liner or something like that.
Starliner. Starliner.
And to compete with the other ones.
And so, because Boeing is a major player in the market,
and ever since they privatized space travel,
and so they have been doing it for a long time.
Space travel, and so they had multiple delays,
and they finally left it off,
and they determined that there were some problems during the launch.
They did successfully connect to the ISS.
International Space Station.
The two astronauts got off,
and they were going to look over the problems
that they discovered during the launch,
and it was supposed to be there for five days.
They were up there for 30.
Now they're going to be there until February of next year.
That's not healthy.
No, it's not.
There's a lot of exercises you've got to do.
A lot of that. What is it called when you're in place doing...
Well, but...
What is it called?
Well, it impacts your muscles.
It impacts your bones, because they've done those studies
when you're up there for a long time.
Yes.
It impacts the density of your bones
and the strength of your muscles,
and some of the other astronauts probably could not be more thrilled.
I'm being dead serious.
They were supposed to be up there for five days,
and they get to experience what they have probably lived their whole lives for.
They want to be up there for six months?
Yeah. Fuck yeah.
I think so.
I don't know, man.
I think they're loving it every second of it.
And you're up there for a purpose,
and you have a list of science stuff that you're doing.
And you've got the time I'm looking...
Oh, they're doing shit, though.
I mean, I don't know.
I imagine they're gets to a point where you're like,
fuck, I've been here for a long time.
Well, not just that.
I am so constipated.
It's not just that, but yeah.
I mean, just the creature comforts.
You know, I'm shitting in a tube.
Right.
I'm pissing at something.
I'm eating this nasty-ass astronaut food for six months.
I haven't had sex forever.
They all have sex up there.
They're pornicating up there.
For sure.
Is that why her hair looks like that?
How would they do that?
Riddled with sperm and it's all stuck in place.
Why don't they be floating around?
She looks like the one Hilda
from fucking the mermaid.
The mermaid.
All right.
Let's get this under control here.
All right.
I forgot what I was saying.
It's just interesting to have
and explain another part of that.
ang Miami.
He's the first kind of THE
People were afraid to have
sex in cave.
But I was 안녕 to the
chef.
He and she were served in the navy.
I guess the navy included deployments during the
they're coming home on space they're given and then the thing about it is
that they're they're given a Elon kind of shit a little bit oh look at you you
gotta come in and steal it all right who else yeah no one else can do it no
one except but if fucking Russian they were reversed and Elon's astronauts were
stuck up there and Boeing was coming to the rescue they'd be like praising them
you know but no they just look oh there's hate not a man you know why
because he switched gears and he likes Trump correct and we didn't talk about
that but RFK and Musk and Tulsi Gabbard they're all getting on board the
Trump train and you should too listeners yeah well congratulations to the
Donald Trump campaign out there showing up to the Virginia Arlington
cemetery for the celebration I call it whatever it's not really a celebration
but just the remembrance and honor of the third year of the Afghanistan debacle
that's what I put a mail down we should talk about that next week all right
well it's August not October 27th thank you mr. producer for providing
excellent commentating materials up on our screen here dudes like us check us
out on Facebook and Instagram with dudes like us dash podcast or dudes like us
dash woodcraft or to submerge from us you know why because we're ready to cook
it up for you in Militia anywhere in the United States anywhere on the fucking
planets make it happen just like a hot dog there you go dude like us I'm Sean
this is the last podcast of August yes it'll be September my name is Paul and
I'm Jeff