Is a stomatical cum stain?
No.
What?
Stomatical?
Yeah, is that what they call a cum stain on the stomach?
No, no, no, no.
What are they called?
What we're talking about is our first concert that we ever went to.
That's just a Paul Pax concert.
We're talking about...
That's a Paul's Roar Sack.
Roar Sash.
Roar Sack?
Is that the Roar Sock test?
The Roar Sack test?
What?
Paul squirts on his belly and goes, I see a bat.
Oh my God.
We cannot do this.
That's where the...
We're not doing this.
...the dingleberries came from.
Yeah, you said...
We're not doing this.
But you're the one who said you're going to have dingleberries on your belly.
I didn't say dingleberries.
What did you say?
I believe you did.
No, it's like, you know, when you're eating a bunch of food and it gets in your belly
and like, you know, we were talking about being the antepho...
Aren't you like dressed?
...and working from home and eating and drinking and like just being filthy.
So you're saying your belly...
There was nothing.
Your belly button eats your crumbs?
Yeah, your crumbs.
That's what I was talking about.
You guys took it in a weird, crazy, sick...
I'm envisioning this, the sweaty Paul with a bunch of crumbs on his belly...
There we go, that's better.
...and a sweat-filled belly button with a hummingbird kind of dipping it in and out.
Yeah, there we go.
Yeah, there we're talking.
Hey, that's like...
No, hold on.
I want to hear the hummingbird... what a hummingbird sound makes.
Oh, you missed the...
Let him go.
Well, it's the...
Go ahead.
What does a hummingbird sound like?
Deflecting.
Don't stop.
Yeah, he's trying to deflect from Paul time.
Damn it!
You guys are too smart for me.
No, he'll be like the guy on dodgeball at the end, you know, when he gets all fat and
he's sitting there getting the crumbs all down his belly.
There we go.
That's where I was going with this and you guys took it in this weird sexual thing.
No, it wasn't Paul.
It's more like the woman with the eyebrows in dodgeball.
In the bucktooth.
Oh, man.
Well, that goes back to shaving.
I shave eyebrows.
I shave my eyebrows.
We never did get...
I trim my eyebrows.
We'll get to that.
Are we going?
Are we live?
Are we rolling?
I thought we were talking about our first concert.
I thought we were rolling.
Thank God.
So I think we need to get into that.
We are going to talk about concerts.
I insist on going back to concerts.
Well, we never finished the discussion since Paul's talking about his stomach and the stuff
he does on it.
No.
Let's discuss.
That's not what I said.
Well, your stomach's like the...
The catch-all.
Crumbs and cum.
Oh, my God.
Fuck you, Paul.
Fuck you.
You know what?
You got it.
You've been going there all night.
I'm going to go ahead and go there.
So Paul's stomachs is holy grail.
That's not what we meant.
Come on.
You gave me a hard time about a condom being found in your dog's butt.
Yes, I did.
And I still will give you a hard time on that.
That was disgusting.
All right.
So we're going to move on.
We're going to try to move on.
That should be the name of our podcast.
Coming Crumbs.
Crumb and cum.
God.
All right.
Moving on.
Anyway, moving on.
We are...
Before we move on, we're going to talk about our bourbon.
We're drinking Redemption Wheat bourbon for our comeback bourbon.
And this is one of our favorites.
We really like it.
We're working on our second bottle.
Oh, very...
Well, not the second bottle tonight, but...
Yeah, we've cracked open the second bottle.
This is the second bottle.
Well, I mean, not a full...
We didn't drink an entire bottle and then open a second one.
Well, no.
Correct.
Not tonight.
It's from the collection.
This is one of the first ones we actually finished.
God, look at that Paul's glass over there.
It looks a little heartier than mine.
No.
That's because you've been sucking on yours.
I haven't taken this...
I haven't pulled back on this once.
Okay, time out.
We're smelling it.
We're enjoying it.
Here we go.
It's kind of hard to do that when I've got...
It's got a great smell.
It does.
It really does.
What do you call it?
I'm saturated with eating it.
Hold on.
It's called the nose.
It's your full glass.
Yes, the nose.
So let's walk through this again.
The nose.
And the...
Taste.
And the finish.
Right, and then the finish because...
Those are the official terms of when you drink a bourbon.
Right, because when you drink a bourbon, probably with all foods...
There's a bouquet that you need to appreciate.
There's a flavor that hits the front of the mouth.
The nose.
And then the flavor is different when it hits the back of the mouth, like the back of the
palate.
Okay.
Which is the...
The what?
Back of the palate.
The finish.
No.
The nose.
That's the end, the finish.
So, and that could come immediately because there could be no finish.
Some of the cheaper bourbons have no finish.
We're just like, yeah, there's nothing there.
But there's three things.
There's the nose, there's the something, and then there's the finish.
What's the middle one?
We got to know this.
We got to be...
Producer.
We got to be bourbon connoisseurs.
Bourbon phases of taste.
Sommeliers.
We have to be sommeliers.
Sommeliers.
Be a dad to your kid.
You have the smell, and then you have the first...
First the nose.
You got to go first, and then you got to end.
It's called the nose, the palate, and then the finish.
Okay.
Nose, palate, and finish.
All right.
So every podcast, we're going to comment on the nose, the palate, and the finish.
That's the way this works.
Yeah.
And the finish, to me, is like the most important because I love to have the satisfaction.
You got to savor it.
I'm telling you, the best finish that I've had for all bourbons right now, right now...
It's called happy ending.
Happy ending.
Sean's happy ending.
Nose smell on his stomach.
What?
Yeah, nose smell is very good.
Oh, it's good.
I also like the...
I'm with you.
The rare breed is one of my favorites.
But as far as the finish goes, the nose smell wins.
All right, here we go.
The nose.
Here we go.
Let's get the steam roll through this.
It smells very corny, very sweet.
Sweet to me, yeah.
Sweet.
Kind of brown, not brown sugary, but more maybe maple-y.
Hey, Paul, you had COVID.
You can't smell.
What?
Just go ahead and drink it.
Damn it.
So I'm excluded from this.
You just get to drink it.
No, I can smell.
I can smell.
And I'm trying to...
So you know what?
It's not...
I just farted.
Well, now I can't smell anything other than Sean's shit.
It smells like Brussels sprouts.
Smell that, bitch.
Yeah.
I think it's a nice bouquet.
We were talking about maybe this section being sponsored by Depends.
You might need to get some, Sean.
For Sean, for sure.
No, more like air freshener.
So there's a little...
Or Saran wrap.
This thing is bought to you by Saran wrap.
A whole hell lot of it.
When I taste this, is this a wheated?
Correct.
I'm surprised.
It's good.
It's a really good bourbon.
Redemption.
Redemption wheat.
Okay.
Redemption wheat and bourbon.
What is the percentage?
45.
Man, that does not taste like a 45.
45 corn?
Wheat.
Oh.
Okay, well then, what's...
So it's not a bourbon.
No, it's got the 51% corn.
51 corn, 45 wheat, and then it's...
And the rest is going to be...
It's barley or rye or whatever.
Barley or rye.
Barley or rye, coconut.
Yeah.
What proof is it?
Steak.
What is this 90 proof?
What is the proof?
We are woefully unprepared.
Oh, it's 90 proof.
Ooh, I'm barking like a barnyard animal.
Yeah.
You don't need that.
He definitely needs some Depends.
Depends.
Yeah, so anyway, moving...
Who had some pork rinds in the middle of our...
Well, you had an entire bag of pork rinds.
Okay, I had half a bag.
Like Costco-sized bag.
There's no we on that anyway.
That's you.
I limited it.
Right.
It was a point program they were celebrating downstairs.
I probably had like six.
You had a full pigskin.
Here's the thing.
We are not barnyard animals, so let's move on to the next topic, shall we?
Yeah.
So we kind of touched on this in the previous podcast.
The pre-part one podcast of tonight.
And the male manicure, and we really did...
We kind of got sidetracked because of Paul.
We didn't finish it.
Let's finish that.
And we really didn't discuss...
You know, we got the typical shave.
We talked about that.
One of the things that I've had done twice now, and I just had it done last week, last
Friday, as a matter of fact.
Do share.
No, it wasn't douche-ing.
I didn't say...
I said do share.
Did you have your Calpers clan pitch?
Yeah, what the hell?
You had it done.
I'm all ears.
What do you have done?
Douche your hair.
Anyway, I had my...
Because I have really big nostril hairs.
So I had my noses...
Yeah, they're like stalks.
I have nose hair.
I had my nostrils waxed.
So where they jam wax up your nose.
Really?
And then they just...
So do you have...
Have you not tried a nose hair trimmer?
Oh yeah, I've got that.
But they're like fricking tables.
It doesn't get through the foil or whatever?
It does, and it works, but they grow so fast and it drives me nuts.
Interesting.
And my boys...
Steven has inherited it, and I'm sure Brandon's going to get it at some point, but it's...
My dad has it.
I've got it.
Just big nose hairs.
You waxed your nose hair.
Yeah.
I have not even heard of this.
Are you kidding me?
No, I haven't.
Producer, pull up wax nose hairs.
There are some memes.
I don't need to watch it.
You do need to watch it.
No, I don't.
That sounds painful, and it sounds...
That's absolutely the reason why dudes like us need to appreciate...
What the hell is going on?
Is it painful?
Because I will tell you, when I pluck...
Oh, it's beyond painful.
I pluck nose hair on the very tips, you know, the ends.
When you do one at a time...
I cry.
It is incredibly painful.
Pull up one of those videos.
Yeah, I cry.
I literally tear up...
That's what it looks like.
That's what happens.
They have these big Q-tips.
What?
They got these things...
Oh, no.
I mean, it is so painful, you block out.
No, it's not.
Or maybe not for pulling out a fricking tree trunk like you got growing in your nose.
No, I call bullshit on these videos.
Because I've gone through it twice.
Right.
It's not comfortable.
You're like, oh, that felt great.
And you're still alive.
But it's like, you know, she jams it up there, and it's in your nose for about 30 seconds,
and she mashes your nostrils to make sure she has good contact.
Everything's touching.
Yeah, everything's touching.
I think he's super glued to his hand.
And then I did not look like that.
And for one thing, she barely pulled.
Right.
But this is entertainment.
Yeah, that's what I said.
This stupid video is entertainment.
I call bullshit on all of these.
Because see, it's not that bad.
It's not that bad.
When you pull...
And I even told her, I was like, that's nothing.
Right.
I was like, when you pull...
Hold on, hold on.
Look at that.
When you pull...
You should have seen mine.
No, no.
I took a picture the first time.
It's on my other phone.
No, no, no.
It looks like a fricking caterpillar.
He has blessed me with one of his pictures of the aftermath that was pulled out of his
nostrils.
This was a year ago.
It was amazing.
It looked like a rodent was on the tip of a fucking Q-tip.
Wow.
And the wax is green.
It was incredible.
The wax is green.
It was incredible.
Anyway.
So I really didn't...
I've never heard of this.
I've never heard of nostrils.
No.
They pulled out stalks of hair.
So, Brian, do you need to do this?
No, I can still get all my hair with just a regular pair of scissors.
No, I...
A head trimmer?
No, I said a pair of scissors.
You just stick it up there.
What do you mean, scissors?
What are you talking about?
Scissors.
Yeah, little scissors.
Like this?
You stick it up there and clip it.
What the hell?
Stick them in your nose and you clip it.
You talk about the small scissors?
Yeah, small pair of scissors.
Yeah.
I haven't heard of that either.
You know, I'm not using hedge trimmers.
You know?
That's a lot of hair.
Yeah.
Yeah, but...
You don't clip your nose hairs?
Well, I pluck them.
I guess you don't.
No, time out.
No, I can see you don't.
Shut up.
I plucked them and recently I bought one of those nose hair trimmers.
No, it cost 15 bucks in the last couple months.
You don't have to deal with it.
Oh, oh, oh.
15 bucks to have them jam.
Yeah, 15 bucks to get it done.
And it took...
A Q-tip with wax up your nose.
It took five minutes to do it.
And you cried.
No, I didn't.
Oh, yeah, you did.
She said, hey, come sit down.
She said, come sit down.
She got her little Q-tip, put the wax on it, jammed it up there.
The wax was warm.
She smashes it down.
She sits there and we kind of...
Small talk.
Yeah, you don't do that.
Small talk.
Small talk and then she kind of smashes it.
Were you naked?
I got full nude for this.
Was she?
Well, I mean, because that wasn't the only thing you were doing that day.
I got the full Brazilian tattoo.
Yeah, you got...
Oh, gross!
I got the full Brazilian.
Did you get the anal bleaching?
Yeah, you got the deluxe package.
She did.
Then she got...
So tell us everything you did when you were full nude.
Well, we got the Brazilian and then she got the Clorox bleach spray and then she bleached
my ass.
No.
Did she?
I didn't do any.
That's hot.
Within the rectum.
Well, hold on.
What about all that hair down there?
You had anal hair?
You had pink hair?
No, she waxed it.
Didn't get any of that done.
I just got the nostrils done.
And I...
That's a weird story.
I recommend it.
That's a weird story.
Can you breathe better?
Yeah.
Can you smell better?
No, but it wasn't about breathing better.
It wasn't about breathing.
It was about controlling all these nose hairs that kept sticking out of my nose.
It's about not finding stuff in your nose hair.
Well, it's that.
And how often do you need to do that?
Well, I did it last week.
Every four days?
It's once an hour.
Mine drove back so fast.
Wow, it's expensive.
Well, he got tired of people saying, man, I really like your mustache.
Yeah.
And you had to shave.
And that's what kind of did it.
Well, what about your ears?
Do they do that with your ears as well?
They can.
And I've got...
Age sucks because hair grows differently as you get older.
My nose hairs are growing faster.
They get fricking airy.
Are you talking about the white ones?
Ear hair.
They go everywhere.
Gray hair.
They grow in all these weird directions.
Yeah.
And I'll continue on with my grooming habits.
Here we go.
The nostril wax.
There are some studies that say it's not real healthy because the nose hairs are there for
a reason.
They are.
They catch pollen.
Yeah, they catch pollen.
And one thing, because I had that concern the first time my wife recommended it.
And she asked the lady...
Your wife?
You got to take care of that.
Yeah.
Well, she's always like, you need to do your hair.
I am not touching you until you get that shit out of your nose.
Well, sometimes it's so bad.
Is that how it went down?
Sometimes it's so bad.
One will come out and it'll curl around the nostril.
Shut up.
Like I said, I look like a mustache.
Yeah, nice dash.
Any man that can floss his teeth with his own nose hair.
Oh, dude.
That's badass.
It drives me nuts.
So I trim it and I'm continually trimming it.
But as you get older, your hair grows differently as you get older.
Obviously when it turns gray, it does things much differently.
Maybe when it's gray, it's thicker.
Is that what it is?
No.
When it's white or gray, it grows in these weird funky directions and is coarse as hell.
Sometimes it's straight.
There you go.
What do you mean?
How do you know?
Is that what you said?
No, I mean, I'm just saying that I don't know what I said.
I thought you said, how do you know?
Because I have it.
Well, no, I didn't say that.
I don't know what I said, but I've just I asked if it was if it was larger and you said
they get longer.
They grow faster.
Yes, I don't think they're they're not white.
They're not bigger.
It's like bamboo stalk.
I think it's harder.
Yeah, they are.
They're more gorgeous.
Course and they and they grow like well and I'm talking about my sideburns.
That's my problem.
My sideburns are they're out of control.
Well, no, they're well, they can be.
But my sideburns, if I if I you know, if I let them go, I mean, the hair grows, they
stick straight out.
And they're all curly and shit.
They're not like normal hair.
It looks like when the when the Star Wars when they when the hair dies, it becomes a
white hair.
It is it.
It makes noises like that.
Chewbacca, what the hell was that?
What are you doing?
That was my of Chewbacca.
That was your Chewbacca.
Yeah, it was you.
No, I didn't.
That was that was Jurassic Park.
I was going to say that when your hair turns white, that doesn't mean it dies.
Yeah, no, the hair follicle follicle dies.
I thought when it dies, it falls out.
I mean, that's when you go bald.
Yeah, that's when you go bald.
Your hair doesn't die and then I feel like your attack.
Well, hair is actually dead anyway.
I don't know.
I don't know what makes the hair white.
But the point is, it becomes it behaves differently.
It does completely behave differently and it's not the producer to pull it up.
How come hair turns white?
That's a great.
That is a great question.
So my whole head is basically gray.
I've been turning gray since my early 30s.
But it doesn't look like your hair is like out of control.
No, it's not.
It's growing different.
But I tell you what, again, going back to my chest hair.
Show us.
Oh, gross, he pulled his shirt down, Sean.
Right here.
Here it is.
Say gray, not white.
And no white.
Well, there you go.
It's melanin deficiencies.
OK, but yeah, it's not dead.
No, it's turning gray.
It tends to be white due to melanin.
Yeah, so it's all medical conditions, smoking, chronic stress, vitamin deficiency.
Smoking, smoking.
You and your fucking smoking.
Made your hair like all shit.
Yeah, I'm a fucking smoker.
I'm a fucking smoker.
I'm a fucking smoker, made your hair like all shitty, and it doesn't say why it turns
gray.
This is as a reason, Harvard says we Harvard Harvard Harvard Harvard, why your turn gray
tuberous sclerosis?
Well, with vitiligo is a little how thoroughly your hair turns gray is influenced mostly
by the genes you inherit from your parents.
My mom was gray early.
though stress may play a role in the process, it would be more helpful to look at past generations
rather than your current stress levels to help you predict when or if you'll go gray.
No, this doesn't give you the medical terms of why it turns gray.
We're not interested in why it turns white or gray. We want to know why it's different.
Why is the white hair so dramatically different than normal hair?
The texture. The texture of the hair.
In the direction, in the coarseness.
That all depends on where it's growing on your body.
If it grows down around your crotch, it's curly.
No it isn't.
If it grows on your head, then it's not curly.
Mine's straight out in every direction.
I was going to say, actually your pubes.
Hold on, you heard it.
Pubes.
Your pubes.
That's crazy.
They don't grow straight. They're not straight all of a sudden.
Mine are.
You can part them and comb them and everything.
No, mine are like oil.
Your pubes?
Well, let me look.
What happened?
So it's like long flowing. Of course, every hair on your body turns gray.
It's not like a horse mane. What are you talking about?
They're not like all flowing in the wind and shit.
How long are your pubes?
He stands in front of a fan and just watches them flow in the wind.
No, that's what you do.
Look at how it flows.
No, the white hair. If you get long white hair, it'll be just as soft as if it was black.
He shampoos with horse and mane on his pubes.
Anyway, you're getting us off track, Paul.
Really, I am?
Anyway, the chest hairs, they go crazy at this point in my life.
And my wife helps me trim those.
And as well as I get older, the back hair has started to sprout as well.
Which drives me fricking nuts.
Sprout like a weed.
It is. I've never had it before and then all of a sudden you turn 40, 45.
And all of a sudden you're just like, shit.
Yeah, that's hot though.
Women love back hair.
Seriously?
Keeps them warm.
I don't think so.
My wife helps me.
She does it down there in Manscaped, the crotchal region or anything like that.
Crotchal?
Crotchal region.
Is that a word?
Why don't you just have her do the electric shaver on your back?
She does.
Or you can just foam up.
She's tried narrow on the back, but that caused a lot of ingrown hair.
No, no, no.
That caused a lot. I couldn't even lean back for a week.
Just regular shaving cream.
It burns the skin and all sorts of weird shit and gets bumps, right?
I had serious back pain.
So that's stuff designed for your legs then there?
I don't know. Don't use it on your back.
Honestly, it shouldn't be designed for anything.
It's not good for you.
Doctors use something that when you go into surgery and you have to...
A razor.
No, well, they use medical duct tape.
Well, there's a...
They Brazilian you.
No matter what surgery, you're in a Brazilian.
They wash a portion of his body with this bar of soap and the hair just kind of fell off.
That's an antiseptic.
God, that can't be good for you.
Imagine that.
What?
Washing your body with a soap and it makes all your hair follicles just like die and give up the hair.
It can't be good for you.
It cannot.
I don't know.
I'm just saying.
My wife did it once in my back and I was like, never again.
That was narrow.
But he was referring to a surgical soap.
Well, what's the difference between having a surgical soap neutralize whatever's holding that hair in
than having some adhesive stuck to it and ripping it out?
Yeah, what do you think would feel better?
Hey, let's put some duct tape on your back and let's rip it off.
See how it feels.
Well, then you have...
You know what? You make a good point.
Then you have the machines, the epilators that are basically a big spring and it vibrates and it grabs it and pulls it out.
Like the epilady.
Well, it's the same concept as yanking it out any other way.
Well, it is, but I couldn't imagine...
What?
And then women do something called...
Is it needling for their eyebrows?
No, yes.
And that's pulling it out too, right?
Yanking it out.
You put threads around your eyebrows and they yank it out. I remember a lady I used to work with.
Why do they have to do that? Why can't they just do normal hair pulling?
With tweezers? Like pluck it out? Susan does that every morning.
Well, I think the needling is threading. It's called threading. It's not called needling.
Threading, that's it.
And I think it's an Oriental or Asian thing on how they used to do it. And they're obviously popping up all over.
Maybe it doesn't hurt?
No, it's extremely painful.
What the hell?
A lady came in and she was telling me about it. She was like, this was the most painful experience I've ever gone through in my life.
She goes, I will never do it again. I went in with my daughter or daughter-in-law or something like that to this threading place.
And they wrap these little thin threads around your eyebrows and just rip it all out.
She's like, it was terrible.
I mean, it just seems to me like so many other options. I don't understand...
They get it all off and then they go in and tattoo it and then you don't have to worry about it anymore.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Well, hold on.
What is a tattoo for?
You're saying they do threading to rip all of the whole eyebrow off?
No, some women do.
Some women will take all their eyebrows off and then they'll do a tattoo.
Yeah, some women do that. I used to work for a lady who, I don't know if she didn't have any eyebrows or she waxed her eyebrows and then she drew them on her forehead.
And they were like really high and they weren't natural looking.
I think that was a sign failed episode.
Drew them like with makeup?
No, with a magic marker.
With a Sharpie.
With a Sharpie?
Yeah, angry eyes.
With a red Sharpie.
She could change colors.
Yeah, angry eyes.
And then if she got mad, she'd just scrub her face and do another Sharpie with a different color.
Yeah, right.
Bad ass.
Again, I don't know if that was because she couldn't grow them or she elected to do that, but some women do that.
And the tattoo, I know some people do it.
So as far as my grooming, that's about it.
And the ears are starting to come into play as well.
And what's frustrating is when I go in and get the haircut now, the haircut people, haircut tenders will kind of jam the razor in there.
Tenders?
Yes, just like a bar tenders, it's a haircut.
Is that a real thing?
I don't know.
A hair tenders?
Probably not.
Is that a band name?
A nose hair tenders.
But anyway, she'll go in there and shave the ears.
And I'm just like, this never had to happen before until I turned a certain age.
I was like, this is ridiculous.
Well, I just use my regular trimmer.
Well, I do too.
My mustache trimmer.
I just trim my ears.
Well, I do too, but you know, I feel like you forget for a couple of days, next thing you go for the, you know, the haircut, they're long.
I stick my fingers in and pinch them out.
I'm just like, you can't go out with my fingers.
I do that too.
I was kind of like, oh, I see some stragglers.
You know what?
And then I cry.
So I pull out nose hair when I'm on long drives.
When I'm doing cross country driving.
To stay awake.
And I had trouble staying awake, I plucked nose hair.
Boom, boom, boom.
It totally works.
Totally works.
Interesting.
Because it's super painful.
It is.
But especially, damn, when you use the tweezers right there on the edge of the nose.
It's like masochism.
It literally makes your tear ducts just boom.
Get the whole nostril done.
So then you're going to start crying.
You can't see it.
You have a wreck.
No, no, no.
Here's the thing.
Well, you look at your phone.
No, I was plucking my nose hairs off.
There you go.
When you're driving, when you're driving, I don't know about you guys, but my fingernails can't get to those, can't get to those.
The ones that really hurt.
I just do whatever I can grab.
Right.
It's kind of gross.
Paul, whenever I'm driving, I'm usually focusing on the road and the people around me.
I'm not focusing in on my nose hair.
Oh, the road.
Do you pull down the visor with the mirror and open it up so you can see the nose hairs that you're pulling?
Yeah, absolutely.
Why wouldn't I?
Put that as mascara.
Yeah.
Yeah, absolutely.
Why watch the road?
The car will drive by itself.
Dude, I have a Tesla.
It's turned a horrible direction.
It did.
We're talking about manscaping.
So manscaping.
No, we're not.
So we're moving on.
Who else scapes their body?
I, you know, on occasion, I do it all.
I do the chest.
I do the nether region.
Yeah, the same.
Absolutely.
Like a newborn baby?
At one point, I became so obsessed and I kind of enjoyed the shaving that I wanted to do my arms and legs and my wife was like, no.
Hell no.
I wanted to be like an Olympic swimmer.
So you wanted to be a bald eagle?
Bald eagle.
There you go.
Do you ever think about shaving your head?
No, because I heard a horrible story once.
What?
Somebody lost a bet.
It was like, like they were like in their late twenties and they, you know how guys like will lose a bet and he shaved his head.
Didn't come back.
That's a lie.
No, this is a first hand story.
This is a first hand story where they all felt horrible for the guy.
First hand story.
Comes back.
Nope.
It's a first hand story.
How is that possible?
He shaved his head and it kind of did not grow back.
It didn't grow back normally.
Like it accelerated what would have happened 10 years later.
And it doesn't make any sense.
So did he like use a razor or just clippers on it?
I don't know.
I don't know the details, but I know for a fact, I know the guy that knows that guy and he was telling the story to me.
So he was either lying to me or it is a real thing.
Was alcohol involved?
I'm sure.
Well, other than that, you're not going to get a straight story from that.
20 year old people.
You know if the hair grows back or not.
And you know if a whole that whole group of friends feels bad or not.
I've had my head shaved and my hair grew back.
Stephen shaved his head and his has grown back.
You're blessed with like a perfect set of hair, even at your age.
Oh, now we're going down that path.
My age.
Yeah, you're old.
I believe we're old.
You're perfect hair.
Well, I am blessed.
My father does have a lot of hair still and he's.
Well, hold on.
It's not your father.
It's your mother.
It's your mother's father.
Did you know that baldness comes from your mother's father, your mother father.
It comes from the mother's side of the family.
Does it?
Yes.
Your mother's father.
Well, he don't think about you.
Actually, that's not showed you that picture of me in a flat.
That's an old you can buy.
I don't think you can buy that picture anymore.
No, it is.
Did it change?
It's always been that way.
No, it's not that that's that they thought that was true.
That's something I confirmed with this new science.
You have to go.
Well, what was that?
Hey, we're going to have to stand that.
What was that?
I just want to make sure everybody I'm OK.
Do we do your mind?
I don't know what happened.
Let Paul clean up his stomach.
I had a stroke or an embolism and I'm OK.
I'm OK.
How about we do a group hug?
No, it's too juicy.
You know, fuck all of you.
You're too far away.
I had a hiccup.
I don't know what it was.
I don't know what that was.
Hey, get a beer bubble.
Get a washcloth.
Get something off his stomach.
I'm never going to let that down.
No, you're not.
Ever.
No.
Shit scraped off my stomach.
As far as, no, I just clip a few nose hairs, a few ear hairs, and that's it.
I'm kind of a skinless cat.
I'm ready to roll.
I don't have much hair.
You don't shave all that, that often?
No?
Well, actually, whenever you go out every day, no, I wouldn't shave every day.
It took me eight months to get this.
Eight months just to get this right here.
Really?
It came out this color.
Isn't that so amazing?
I find that fascinating.
I got on a Zoom call today at work, and, you know, we don't always do our video, but we
did this time.
Everybody did.
And one dude had like a freaking huge ass beard.
And I was like, okay, I didn't see you all that long ago, like on Zoom.
I was like, where the hell did that come from?
Some guys can grow beards quick.
Isn't that crazy?
Why is that?
That's just so bizarre to me.
Like I said, they got hair in a roll.
Is it testosterone?
No.
No, it's not testosterone.
They're more feral than you.
Some people have a bigger penis than others.
It's just hereditary.
It could be.
Could be.
That's why I grow hair fast.
Yeah.
See, my dad, my dad doesn't, he couldn't grow a beard until it came out gray.
I don't have hardly, I'm basically skinless here.
I don't have any hair chest.
Skinless?
So it's like just raw?
It's raw.
Yeah.
Well, you know.
Yeah, that's crazy.
Well, Paul won't keep his hands off of it, so he does rub it so much.
Oh, it's so smooth.
Wow.
He goes, man, it's so smooth.
Smooth is silk.
I don't remember any of this.
Is that how you talk about basketball?
You like gently rub your face against it?
Yeah, like the Ben Stiller, the Ben Stiller thing.
Oh my God, you have no hair on your chest.
I need to take a shower after this.
God, no kidding.
These are disgusting topics.
I wanted to talk about concerts that we did, too.
I guess we're getting off of, we're getting off of man scalping.
Well, we don't have to get on the hair.
But manicuring is important, and manicuring is important for professional purposes.
You need to look, you need to dress, you need to look professional.
Especially if you're a penis model.
And so if you have those hairs sticking out your nose, that's unprofessional.
It is.
If you got hairs sticking out your ears, it's unprofessional.
You got to have clean cut.
If you want long hair, fuck it, have long hair.
But take care of it.
I'm with you.
There have been moments.
There actually have been moments where I have noticed people's nose hair and ear hair and been like,
Now, for your wife and personal experiences, like if your wife, you know, that's a personal level.
So if your wife, you want to look up for your wife, you need to maintain your stuff, you know.
You don't necessarily have to shave, but you need to clip your stuff.
If you got two inch fricking chest hairs, you need to trim those back boys.
Unless they're into that.
Unless they're all into that.
If you're going to be in a meeting and you actually turn on your video.
With his shirt off.
That's not good.
Get Jeffrey Tubin it.
Yeah.
Jeffrey Tubin it.
What?
Get a Jeffrey Tubin it.
Jeffrey Tubing?
Yeah.
Tubin.
The dude that was.
He's the dude from CNN.
Yeah.
The dude that got caught touching himself.
Yeah.
You know, you definitely don't want to do that.
Or on this meeting.
Jeffrey Tubin.
Yes.
I remember that.
This meeting we had, of course, I never turned on my video, but some dude did.
He forgot.
Oh, no.
Yeah.
Oh, yeah.
He started digging, baby.
He was cleaning.
He was spaulding, you know, on Caddyshack.
And they go, no, he's not going to do it.
Another dude recorded it.
What?
Okay.
Oh, God.
You know what?
That's crap.
Somebody needed to text him or chat with him and be like, turn the damn camera off, you
idiot.
He was overseas.
This was part of the thing.
He was.
I go, seriously, I didn't see it because all the screens didn't come up on my.
So he's an Indian contractor?
Well, he's.
He was one of our counterparts in Germany or Australia or whatever.
But man, they said he was going to town.
I saw the video.
The guy actually videoed it.
He goes, man, did you see that?
I said, no.
Well, come on, turn the camera off.
You're going to clean yourself.
Yeah.
I mean, that's why I don't.
There have been so many stories like that.
I mean, if they make me do mine.
People leave their cameras on.
I'm going to get up and I'm going to bend over and pick up something.
I'm going to say that'll be the last time I turn my camera on.
Let him see everything.
I don't want my camera on.
Not going to work for your company.
Well, my boss doesn't want to see me.
So he, you know, hey, turn your camera off.
It's off.
Are you serious?
He knows what I look like.
I don't need to turn on.
So we rarely have our cameras on, but there are team meetings where I mean, I even say,
I go, this is a camera meeting because I want to see everybody's faces.
We want to laugh and see each other.
And we're not even talking about work.
We're just kind of catching up.
Now, do you take a shower?
I do tell my team this is a camera meeting.
Do you take a shower whenever it's going to be a camera meeting?
I shower every now.
I have a routine in the morning just like I did when I went to work.
You shower every day?
Every morning I get up and I follow the same routine.
Otherwise, I wouldn't get up on time.
I have to I have to set my alarm.
I set my alarm.
I get up, brush my teeth, shave.
Good for you.
Shower, get dressed, and then I'm ready for work.
Good for you.
I respect that.
I don't have that.
I envy that actually.
I don't have that routine at all.
I wish I could get that.
Yeah, if I didn't, I wouldn't.
Like on the weekends, I feel nasty if I don't shower and it bugs me.
You have shit on your stomach.
That's you Paul.
You're projecting.
Yes, I'm deflecting.
You're deflecting.
I'm going to keep trying because I got to get this off me.
It's a stench.
Yeah, yeah, that's what the shit.
I may have to leave the podcast.
What's the?
We're going to get that made.
It's maybe an ender for me.
Listen, all you listeners that like since we're since we're talking about that, yeah,
what's the what's the best concert you've been to that you've been shit face that maybe
you couldn't remember?
I've been shit face at all of my concerts.
What was the first one?
I tried to remember my very first concert.
It had to be when I was in high school and it had to.
I think it was.
I think it was heart and you know who opened for them was the Hooters.
Yes, I'll use the heart.
I'll use zombies.
Where did you go?
Well, where was the concert?
It was the summit in Houston.
The summit.
You know, I met the Hooters.
You've met some Hooters like talk about the Hooters you've met.
Yes.
No, the band.
Oh, you made fun of me last time.
Yeah, we talked about.
Yes, you made fun of me every time.
Every time was hard not to.
Well, my first one.
Let's see.
My first concert was at the Coliseum in Houston in 1963 and it was Jethro told.
Oh, no way.
It is rock and flute.
The flute do the flute is the flautist flautist.
Yeah, Aqualung, which is a decent song.
I am trying to remember how that goes.
OK, that's not it.
I can promise you that was Aqualung.
That was yes.
Oh, yes.
You guys are so lucky to get to see the visual we did of Jethro playing the air flutes.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, actually, that was the second concert I saw to I saw Jethro told twice.
You went back to second time.
Yeah, the next year.
I Piper himself.
Yeah.
Crazy.
He looks like the Piper.
And he was back at the Coliseum.
Gosh, it's hard for me to remember.
I saw it may have been Eddie Murphy, one of his concerts.
It's not his comedy.
No, that didn't count.
No, you got to be going with the band band.
So or soloist.
I saw Motley Crue.
I believe that may have been my first one.
I saw an old country, not the crew.
Something read Jerry Reed, Lou Reed.
No, I saw Jerry Reed.
I don't even know what the fuck he said.
He's smoking the bandit.
I saw he's down about that guy.
I saw Jerry Reed and this was in Mannheim, Germany.
He's the he's the truck driver.
Yes, he is.
Yeah, I saw Motley Crue.
You're saying he was a country music country.
I mean, yeah, I saw him because this was this was the same time that I saw Star Wars.
Yeah, right around.
No, the first one was in seventy two.
No, seventy seven.
Seventy eight.
Seventy seventy seven was when the first seven that you a dollar is released in seventy eight
though, maybe in Germany or or or high Kong.
Once you over.
Yeah, he was over.
Kong.
What the fuck is high Kong?
I mean, it was it was Indonesia that before they called it Hong Kong.
The hell just happened.
God, your history sucks.
What's going on here?
My geographical knowledge.
Yeah, really.
Why don't we get nice?
So you saw the smoking the bandit truck driver in Germany.
It was so long ago.
But really, the one that was was memorable was when I lived in El Taco and El Paso, El
Paso.
And I remember it was it was as P 94 FM and there was some weird Sean Cruz.
Sean Cruz.
Come see him flip the bottles.
Is it for what?
Is it?
How was that?
Was it hosier?
Rico?
That German?
That was awful.
Did you go see Hulio Galatia?
Luxembourgian.
I don't know.
So again, it was it was it was Joan Jett, actually, a run DMC.
That's what his god bless.
Yeah, Joan Jett run DMC.
They toured together, didn't they?
Well, I saw them together.
So it was run DMC and Joan Jett.
Yes, it was.
It wasn't.
Yes, it was.
They toured together.
Well, 1984, 85.
Well, they had that walk this way crossover hit with Aerosmith.
So they're probably trying to capitalize on the rock fans as well.
You being dead serious.
Joan Jett.
Yeah.
And run DMC.
Yeah.
No, there were some other artists.
I just don't recall who they were.
But those were the two.
Was not Jeff.
No, he was he was soloist.
B94 FM was the radio station.
I remember there was some Lollapalooza.
The B. That's what it was.
That was that was 96.3.
KBNA.
K Bueno radio station.
Paso, Texas.
No, man.
One commercial.
They had a billboard too.
That is fantastic.
It had your picture on it.
They had a little bottom caption on there.
But your picture was not on it.
No.
Thank God.
Yeah.
That would have been awful.
That would have been kind of cool.
But one of my more one of my more memorable concerts was when I was in college.
I went to see we drove to Columbus, Ohio to see Edie Burkell and the New Bohemians.
Yes.
What I am is what I am.
That's a great song.
What you are.
I'm not going to try singing it, but that was a great song.
And this is when I was a senior in college, I believe.
And I was living with the two, the three ladies and one guy.
And we all drove up there.
And I remember my one roommate who was the other male, the drummer was eating cucumbers
all night.
He was just had a bowl of cucumbers.
And at the end of the night, like slices.
Yeah.
He was like deep.
So anyway, at the end of the night, he was he was throwing them out to the crowd.
The cucumber slices that were left for.
Yeah.
Like you saw the guitar pick out or the stick or something like that.
No, he was throwing cucumber slices.
My roommate, the other guy, he caught it.
He was so excited.
He's like, he ate it.
And it was a pile of mush because it would have been sitting there for an hour and a
half.
And it was warm.
And he looked.
I don't know if he ate it.
I can't remember if he ate it or not.
But that's one of those.
He's like he was so in love with Edie Burkell and the New Bohemians.
I think he did eat it.
And this thing was the nastiest looking thing.
I was like, I can't believe he ate it.
But he did it.
That's a great thought.
Boom.
But he didn't do.
Do you know she was from the Dallas area?
No.
In fact, I didn't even know who she was married to until like the last couple of years.
Paul Simon.
I didn't know.
She seems like way too young for him.
Way younger than Paul Simon.
Yeah.
What does Edie Burkell look like these days?
She must be hung like a horse.
She's probably 45 and he's 113.
No, she's like 55, 58 right now.
58 and he's 177.
EID.
DDIE.
1D.
IE.
Edie Burkell.
Space.
Burkell.
Great song.
So she had the one album and then that was it.
So how old is she?
More than 66.
So that makes her 54.
I thought she was cute.
So she's 54.
Now look up Paul Simon.
There is.
Oh my God.
Look how old he is.
God.
Dude.
I love Paul Simon, though.
I mean, there's no, you know, there's no sense in beating up a poor man.
Yeah, but I'm just like.
But dude, but he is like 100 and what?
100 and what?
85, I think.
She's got to be a relics.
Are they still together?
Who?
Are they still together?
Spouses.
Yeah.
Married in 1992.
He's five foot two inches.
Yeah, he's short.
Do you remember the the awesome video with Chevy Chase?
Oh, yeah, that was a great video.
Yeah, great video.
Call me Al.
You can call me.
Call me.
He is an exceptionally talented musician and songwriter.
Well, he's like four feet tall, though.
He's five foot two.
I talked about this.
Oh, I blacked out that.
Yeah, but you'd be killed.
It's eight.
No, no, she's five.
She's five.
Nine.
Five.
Sorry.
She's five.
Nine.
I mean, that she's five.
And then I have a really good friend.
I'm a radio.
If you believe Wikipedia.
And are they still together?
Yeah, that's fantastic.
He is 80.
So 30 years difference, right?
Did I get that right?
Oh, more than it.
85 and 55.
Seventy nine and 54.
So do that.
So not quite.
So 25 years.
God, that's bizarre.
It's a lot.
And they're still together and they've been together for a long time.
That's often.
I'm happy.
Big time.
Happy for them.
She has a she has one, two, three, three kids.
With him.
Yeah, the daughter and the two sons. So they married when
She was in her 30s. Well, they're less they were buried in 1992. I ball their last kids only two years old
He popped one out at 85
Fantastic, but he can't pick him up
That's beside the point. We didn't have to change it
Yeah, but I haven't listened to you change him. I'm too. Oh honey. I can't pick him up. I can't stand
I can't
Do that I'm in a wheelchair
What yeah, I'm gonna have to listen back go back and listen to her stuff because it's
Actually, let me rephrase that if you have some wealth
I mean, I'm not saying it's it cures all the problems or but it's got to make life a little bit easier
I mean having kids like that and you you've got some wealth behind you to have a nanny to help support change the diapers
Yeah, the problem is when you start doing that it affects your kids
Because they grew up with the nanny all right Brad instead of the parents. Yep. I think I think
It's making my life making my life easier, but I'm ruining my kids
They don't they don't understand the difference between the hand and a handout
Yeah, maybe but you know because then they come to you. Well, hey, I need you to you know, give me this
Give me that give me that you haven't you've been paying people to take care of the kids the whole time and once they're old enough
And gone, you know, you know, you want your kids. Hey, you got to take care of yourself. There you go, you know, yeah
Hopefully by that time in all seriousness, I I would not have been on board with you know
You know what? We may be full of shit if I had all the money in the world
would I have gotten a
Nanny and this and never see the kid, you know because all pair hold on
It doesn't have to be like that if you I don't know what I have
Wait a second if he's got all the money in the world, it means we don't have any so we have we'd be coming and
Wanting to work for you. Well, you're servant Paul. Yeah, we get the shit off my stomach
That Sean work my pool. I could do my garden. I'll be your
He could do
Man here shit off your dog
Rotating door
I'll just walk you three-legged dog won't go very fast
She could I tell you she's gonna be able to haul ass. Yeah. Well, she is just starting to be
First door. She has no
She is just starting to be able to play like like Shelley would try to play with him play with her and she'll get excited
And she'll start to spin around or try to and jump around. I'm telling you this girl is gonna be able to haul ass
I'm telling you she is okay. Is really a bull terrier. I don't know what she is. She's a mutt
She looks similar to a dog that I that I used to have she looks like she's got some kind of bull terrier
She is exceptionally
Muscular I'm very impressed
In one of those days where she ran away and and she was in a full sprint. I literally my jaw dropped
I was like, I don't I've never seen a dog this fast. She went into a full full like Greyhound sprint
I think steroids they do that at the animal. Yeah, maybe
Well, they do a lot of milk with with well when you get the the smell of hormone they run
They're like fuck that it smelled the dookies back
I do not have like this death qual
Whatever you call it. I think that I think what the dog did was look at the family say do I want to marry this family?
I know what do I want to wake up and I'm there. I want to go to bed and they're there
There's no Navy need any food here. They just brought me home. There's no food. I did the same thing
I ran for my life
I had vision like the clouds are sprinting down the road and they took me back there
Did you were streaking down the road? Yeah, I tried to get the hell out of there streaking you were streaking when you streaking
I didn't say streaking said streaking. I said sprinting. I think you said streaking. I heard streaking
No, you've none of you heard anything
These are not the droids you're looking
So that is not what you heard, yeah, so Paul you you've never told us what your first concert was
You know, I said heart
Well, you didn't expand on that very well
reason
I'm trying, you know, honestly, I I saw the fan hailing 5150
Because that was an actual experience that was in high school and that's when I had my first homosexual experience
Really?
About that no
Was it a heart? I haven't had a freaking homosexual experience. Yeah
You had some guy that was manicuring your chest hairs
In high school at the time I tell you what you talk about hairless rat
I was a hairless rat until when my 30s. I had no chest hair none
until
Until late in my 20s, you know that album alone from heart. It was one of my favorite albums
It was one of the first albums. I listened to the whole thing. It was that Boston third stage
But that was right around the same time heart
Yeah, I enjoyed it. It's fantastic
I'm trying to remember my my favorite concert ever. You know, how about this?
How about a concert you would have or a band you'd like to have seen in their prime that you didn't
Boston God. Well, I saw the Boston
So that's not that not that long ago and they were great. No, I saw Boston but not with Brad Dillp
Yeah, I mean with the original with the original band players. I would have loved to see the Eagles
I would love to see them in that one concert that they recorded that
The hell freezes everyone. No the one way before that she ever bridges road. Yeah, the seven bridges road concert there
Oh, man, that was that was that was I'm done. I would have liked to see you are going for AC or the original
The original with Bob's gut for me. I like easy. Yeah
Yeah, it would have been it would have been over the top. I think with his whole leg kicking dance
Kicking thing maybe but now I'm like I'm so done with AC DC
Well, what I was I hear the song I like change Malcolm is dead. He had he got dimension. He died
I like the scorpions. Hey, what's the best seat you ever had at a concert?
it's probably the Edie Burkel because it was just open house and open floor, whatever you want to call that and
We were right there
Like two people back
Stage yeah, I know I never got closer than the grass at Fair Park them
I was a I started off at eighth row at rush
And that's a good concert ended up first row went all the way down the front
I can see the sweat coming off of his head
Lee yeah
No, no, I didn't get I didn't get covered from it. Well, they didn't have Kobe back then well they did
It's just they probably don't would cared about it. Well, that's right. No one cared. Well lock everybody down
It was kovat 73
You know, it was just it was just I got sick and yeah, it was probably no, but it was it was right right down there
I mean you had the bouncers
You know, I am remembering now one of my best concerts ever was Billy Joel. I saw the storm front storm
Oh, that was for the great one. It was a great concert. Is he still touring cuz I'd like to see no
He is not he is playing
I don't know if he's still doing it because of Kovac and all that but he switched to you know how like
entertainers in Vegas have a
They just stay there, right? Well, he stayed in New York at Madison Square Garden and just played several times a week
I think hmm where he just did show after show after show and it became like a thing like Vegas
Well, he's like making huge money huge money and he's I mean who wouldn't want to go to unbelievable. I mean people will like
Like cater their whole vacation. Hey, you know what? We're gonna go see Billy Joel. Yeah, it's kind of like I would do it
It's kind of like I would do it. We want to go see night wish. I would love to go see that wish
Here's the concert. I I
George straight
night wish
I've got a George straight like three times
Yeah, I've seen George straight. I've seen
That's all I'm at the Fort Worth you guys
How do you two years ago time I saw him twice in El Taco we travel I try I saw him in El Paso
And then we traveled to New Mexico
to go see him and
That was a story of you have seen it
story about my trip to the one in New Mexico, so we were as a buddy mine is
Mark Martin, I'm trying to get the tongue Martin
That's a sense they are there's no my rock my team just one simple little
12 there's no sir like in there. It was about a 45 minute drive so
I love how you steamroll through our shit
Yeah, that that deserves some sort of like a metal or something all right 12 pack of something
So I remember what it was so we took turns driving he drove like a California
Cure X and we were just like just cruising down there, so we get to this so we're primed or drunk. I'm drunk
I'm drunk. I'm 18. I just graduated from high school
that's under a go to one to one of my first concerts and
not my first guys were one of my first concerts and
So I'm I got this cigarette
I don't know even I didn't smoke and I got a cigarette and I'm walking up the stairs
I remember him playing in the background. I got to go pee and I got the cigarette
This is big cop in front of me
And he's like sir you know a lot of smoke cigarettes in here. I say man. I am really sorry. I was
Hammered and so I take the so you said oh
I don't know it was it was probably drunken knees for sure
But I picked up the cigarette and I flicked the cherry off the cigarette to be cool
Towards the ground so that it would bounce on the ground and I would step on it
However, it did not go that direction. You know how when you flick something
You know and you're uncoordinated yeah, and you're drunk and drunk I followed through and evidently I was pointing at his penis
at the end of the flick
You know right the crotch it went right to his crotch and I
Got like I seriously I thought I was gonna die and the dude
The dude he let me go to the bathroom and that was it. I didn't smoke for the rest of the time
I didn't smoke for the rest of the concert. He probably laughed his ass off after you shit your pants
Totally hit him with the crotch and he's just kind of BAM. He just looked at it like and you like
The deck didn't catch his pubes on fire
That's one way to get rid of your hair just burn it
It's a brute Faberge down there. What he did was it all I caught his zipper just like this Brillo pad out of a zipper
Dude it's better than wearing acetate police pants
Burn his pubes bounced off his pants no bright set of burn his pubes is his fly might have been open it might have just
Gone right in to be the hole in one
He probably said hey my wife's gonna like it tonight
The concert was great waiting for years for him to shave that shit bald eagle
Smell
80s and early this was the late 80s, dude. This was 1989
And he was in his prime man, I'm telling you and the women were beautiful out there
It was such a great venue. We were at and he is an absolute brilliant
I was toasty, but I remember it and we had such a great time and I'm jealous
Yeah, well now he's playing on coming back to the fort if you go to the Fort Worth Coliseum, he's too geriatric at this
That's no, no, no, no, okay. China. No always he never was going Brooks. Were you jumping around? He'll just stand there with you?
It's different
No, he comes out and he moved from speaker to speaker and I mean that Fort Worth Coliseum is not real big
But it's a nice can you do me a favor if you find out if he's coming back? I'm willing to pay whatever
You help me
Coming
For me I producer what's George Strait coming back at the time George George straight to her to back up a little bit
I will never ever contribute anything else to Garth Brooks. Why?
Come on, sorry, but he performed at the inauguration. No because of the crappy stuff. He said what he's saying
We're gonna have to go. I thought he was a hundred percent about unity and he said that's why I played at the inauguration
Because I'm about unity which I respect it. Yeah, that's what he said for that particular and then he dog trump
It was way before that and way after well right now events have been canceled. Damn it. Colvin. It's at Minneapolis. We can go
I would be willing to fly
All so anywhere he plays but you wouldn't go to Germany to see night wish with us. I guess that's it
Germany do all cities. I have a really
That is all cities we could stay with him. Let's go but I mean he's he's playing
You never give them a chance that's watch ghost love score right now now the whole thing no
That is a crying shame in I feel bad for you. I don't I don't feel bad for me
But George straight I saw him at the old Cowboy Stadium
No, and
And Brad Paisley was there the
very famous
Conservative Dixie chicks were there. You know what? I think Tara and I were at that same concert and Jodie Messina was there
It was actually a really good concert. Yeah
All right, so I've come around on the I'm come around. I
Listen to the Dixie Dixie chicks and I don't around I'd
Know you and I I don't I don't hold anything against them
I don't I listen to the music and I you know
There were the people that stomped on the CDs and and swore that they would never listen to Dixie chicks again
And now they're called the chicks. Yeah
I'm not I'm not I'm not gonna get wrapped up in it. We took we on a previous podcast. We talked about this
That's how they win
I'm never gonna watch a movie from that guy and I'm never gonna listen to music from that guy
That's how you make a statement, but you know what? It's bullshit
I'm not gonna revise the history my history and the things that I connect with in terms of music and movies
I'm not gonna let them steal the memories. I so what do you say you're gonna you're gonna like all in for Michael Jackson now
all in
Good music. Yeah, he does get good music. So where do you draw the line? You got you got what?
What is that that dude that was the laid down next to a 15 year old that had a timeout?
Oh, no, no, no, no, no the Netflix they had a show
The cuties god damn it. I've said is
Okay, there's an actor and he was messing around with a 15 year old boy and they canceled the show
Kevin Spacey it is Kevin Spacey, you know, I'm just saying they black they blackballed his ass
Okay, and they didn't do that to Michael Jackson. I mean, I'm not trying to say either or I'm just saying how can you?
Not one. How can you say one is horrible? And the other one's not I you never heard me say that
Like if there was a Kevin Spacey movie that I absolutely like oh, it's different because it's years ago
I would still watch it today like the usual suspect. Yeah, I'm still I know it's if I want to watch that
I would watch that crazy baby driver. I just here's my point
I don't want to revise history based on the fact that they're human and that they made mistakes and they said stupid things or did
Stupid things. Well, I'm not I'm not gonna cancel their into the abyss of a block of a person's butthole timeout here
Here's a here's the better point. How much do we hate to cancel culture?
We hate it. Yeah, we hate that bullshit and we would be hypocrites because we're canceling
No, no what we're canceling them from from the movies we like and the music we listen to or canceling them because of some decision
They made later in life either what they said and what they did a point that's cancer. That is cancel culture
It is but there's a hypocrite. There's also levels. Let's say, okay. Well so and so
I don't know if it was ever proven but Kevin Spacey raped boy or
Whoever. I know what you're saying. Is that on the same level as I don't agree with his politics. I don't know
I don't know. I don't know how to answer that
That's a personal well, they threw the book at Kevin Spacey. They did they did but well, no, he got it
You quit it. I was a bar. They threw the book at her for making a comment. I know
So how was that equitable?
You know bottom line is it's a personal decision. We all have to make
Bottom line is it's a personal decision. We all have to make
You and you know what?
I respect whatever decision you make because you know, who am I to say, you know, you shouldn't ever listen to Michael Jackson again, dude
Yeah, I get it. But I do and they play Michael Jackson all the time all the time. You can't get away from it
I really enjoy the Dixie chicks. I love so I have such a blast and it was so disappointing to hear her rhetoric
It was it's so disappointing. If they would just shut the fuck up. I know it well I put it this way
Just you don't have to support them financially. No, you don't you can listen to them. I'm never gonna go to a concert
I'm never gonna buy a CD. I'll listen to by the radio cuz that's not
Contributing to their fame or fortune. I hear you when I play them on Amazon music. They're making money
Minuscule just a penny
Minuscule money a nickel. I'll flip them. Is that sure? No, it's a penny
Yeah, that's why the bassist from Nightwish quit
He's like he's like you can't make money in the music industry
We can't tour if you make a CD no one buys it because everyone's gonna stream it free on Spotify, right?
And we get paid almost nothing for streaming says bullshit cuz I paid a hundred bucks for that recording of the concert
Well, that was a little different but he's true. They're trying to make money musicians make money off of concerts anymore
Bitch, I think you need to email what you need to email floor and then and have a discussion whether
They're like they made a hundred and fifteen hundred fifty thousand dollars hundred fifteen thousand dollars
I think we're losing Brian. He's starting to fade. No, I'm here. He doesn't know night
He's way first off. He's way past his bedtime. What's a producer? Are we able to pull up a little snippet of Nightwish? Oh, don't
The answer is no. Come on, mr. Producer. The answer is no just play like the very last
No, the last what I mean of a 20-minute song dude, if you want me to hear a song, do you think I would shoot it down?
Okay, he wants to hear the butthole here we go the butthole. All right after this play
I was like what I don't want to possibly play that would upset me
You know what nobody on this podcast wants to hear Nightwish. Well, you can play I play as Michael Jackson beat it. There we go. Yeah, beat it
Did you know that Toto I like Toto was a big not all Toto but a lot of the Toto folks were part of that
thriller album
Really?
Musicians the musicians the drummers Jeff Percaro Jeff Percaro. Who's the guitarist?
Any any damn him no, yes, he played in Toto
But he did play on beat it. He did he played it. He did play that solo
Yeah, but the rest of it is the guitarist from
God Steve Lukather
Is the guitarist and the singer? Yes
From yeah, he's from Toto. Yeah, there was a documentary that Steve Lukather and
He had a conversation of all these different albums that he played on he performed on you know what?
That's not uncommon. He wasn't he didn't live with that's not uncommon
These guys are amazing musicians and then they they they all know like up-and-coming like will be like I need an amazing
You know a bassist and we play with you
We'll play with you. Well, they in in studio in studio in studio. They do a lot of this just kind of
They have fun if you have a band and it's amazing on on the actual album that you buy they have these
no name brand
Musicians that perform before the album. Yeah, not even the real stars not even the real rock stars perform them
It's like these session players play right and they're they are professional musicians
Yeah, they don't play it's and they're amazing. Yeah, it's crazy
Well, there is a band back in the I think I don't know if they started back in the 60s or 70s
And it was as a group of guys
Who were on basically almost all of the albums? I can't remember. Was it the hit crew or something like that the Beatles?
Yes, it was actually I wasn't them playing it was the hit crew. I can't remember the
I'm gonna have to look it up. It was it was a it was a session players
And they were on many of the
Albums back in the 70s and 80s. Yeah, the same guys same guys. Yeah. No, I do too bitch
I mean, I know I know we hear stories of professional music, you know, it makes me it makes me think of like the the shows like
American Idol and
And the voice those guys that the wrecking that claim called the wrecking crew
I looked at a mr. Producer the wrecking crew from what year what decades?
They were there employed for thousands of studio recordings in the 60s and 70s including several hundred top 40 hits
And do 60s like there was a female bass player that was part of the wrecking crew that you got it the wrecking crew
Yeah, that's them. No, yeah
They're not they're not a band that Carol that Carol K right there
Yeah, she she's a bass player and she came up with so it the god damn
Sonny and Cher she came up with
I mean she came up with the whole bass. I
Don't know I kind of losing direction but
Remember that one part right there she is I forgot where I am
She came up with the whole line for their their music the all the Sonny Cher came up with like the lyrics and she came
Up with the part of the music the main part of you guys check her out
She's like some like legendary bassist
85 years or right now and they had an interview with her
Year or two ago, and she still can slap and do like the old Seinfeld
Bump, you know, we're so cool. I would love to have these legends. I would know
I would love to see how these legends
Are with their grandkids, right and they're like grandpa play
Blah blah blah or or play some music for us. Okay, and they pull out the guitar and they're like
Amazing I mean they're legends. Yeah, I mean how I mean I remember
There was a folk singer that my dad grew up listening to he was called Johnny
damn
Johnny be good. No Johnny Mathis
Point is he was huge in the 50s and he ended up getting beaten up on the side of the road and it destroyed his career
But the point is then I see
I thought I was really into that folk music because I loved what my dad listened to and I listened to it and then I
Found a YouTube video
where the dude
Is on a cruise and his family is all around him and they're like
You know dad, you know his son dad play play something for us and he gets up on the stage at a cruise
You know on a cruise like in one little those little you know, not like I'm a big stage
but you know in a little bar and he played one of his songs and he was like
Freaking in his second play like that. Oh like 70s or 80s and I was thinking to myself
How freaking cool would it be to have talent like that and to be able to give that talent back to their family or friends?
Forever. Yep, you know as long as they could do that. Yep. I mean, I just thought it was the question
I remember you if you could remember his name. Yeah, I'll get it. I'll get it
Yeah, so that wrecking crew I just I just not have you're not gonna know who you I just looked real quick
They were on a bunch of Simon and Garfunkel
They were all the hits for the Beach Boys
Help me Rhonda of good vibrations. That's the record crew
They did the righteous brothers. You've lost that love and feeling that makes sense. Jimmy Rogers
Yeah, the Beach Boys
So during the 60s when they were hit doing other hits it was the wrecking crew and all those albums
That's awesome unless it's a live album if it's a studio version. It's the wrecking crew
So yeah, it's not the Beach Boys playing you want to record something. That was the band that you got them. Yeah
Yeah, so his name is Jimmy Rogers and it's with a D. He was blank. It's with a D. Not a yep
Well, no DG roaders I see G
That's him which one on the far left top
That looks Elvis what I
Was trying to direct the blast you just flacked the back wall there
Even for Paul, I think the pork rinds just came out
Of all the people I was thinking Paul would be the least susceptible for the smelling sense. Yeah. No, I'm still recovering from COVID
You're good
Smells sweet. It's not gonna be there's not a wall
It permeates everything we don't have the the plastic wall like you do at all these other workplaces
There's no we don't have any divide. How are we doing on time here? I
Think I think we're oh, yeah, it's got five minutes. We gotta wrap this up. All right, so Jimmy Rogers
This is what my dad listened to and this is the 50s and he's never heard of honeycomb
Honeycomb was a very if you look up a video go ahead and this producer honeycomb Jimmy Rogers
So you met this guy I did did I know I didn't meet him. What do you mean?
I thought you said you you met no, no, I saw a YouTube video of when he was in his
70s no Paul said that he got beat up on the side road. Paul was the guy that beat this guy
I went that was Paul. I thought you said you're on a cruise. I went back in time. I thought you were in a cruise with
No
Hey scroll down producer look at the guy that looks like Eddie Munster
Jimmy Rogers looks like the dude from Eddie Munster's
Roll up right there in the middle. I think he did play Eddie Munster
White videos look at that look at that Jimmy Rogers. It looks like the family honeycombs Jimmy Rogers honeycomb
Who was the kid on Adam's family? Oh shit. I don't remember
No, what was his name? I'm a you bill
I thought it was Eddie look at that Eddie Munster. It was Eddie. Yeah, I think it was Eddie. Yeah, and you had cousin yet
cousin
We're going to close. We're gonna close with a video of Jimmy Rogers
Austin can do Eddie if he can get to YouTube there you go
Austin Austin can do one. Oh, no, he puts his hair in front of them. Oh
Honeycomb never heard of it. I got my clothes with this. Yeah
Closing with this
Because we're showing respect to artists of the 50s. That's tonight's theme
Does he did I'm sorry did I not tell you guys that this the whole podcast was dedicated to the 50s?
What are the lyrics on this?
February honey celebrated the honeycomb honeycomb honeycombs all over my stomach
Honeycombs all over my stomach
Hey, I'm awake damn you guys I'm on a honeycomb on my stomach. I got your be eyes all right
I was trying to show respect to Jimmy Rogers
Is he flipping the song the song is
12 years older than I am
Sounds like
So you asked what did runes crew this is what songs were good good length
It's very strange. He got beat up on the side of the road
Well, you know what those are life lessons. He probably said something stupid
No, that's how they handle it was a random attack. They were like forget
Random attack that's how he died. No, he didn't die. He just he got messed up so bad that it ruined his career
Why do you beat up what he do? I don't need the random time. He wouldn't share his honeycomb
Republicans
Antifa went after him back in the 50s. Yeah
Hey, you know what though one song that I listen to is you think about this
Elvis Presley
Elvis Presley, you know Elvis Presley you think about how great he is. I think I think this is listening
There is an ad for a waxing kit for men. Oh, there you go
I can't believe we're able to listen to this song. Elvis Presley in the ghetto
You think they sing that song nowadays Elvis Presley in the ghetto. Are you kill the song? It's a good song
It is a great song, but you think about it now
Anybody sing a song like that?
You know the mama cries cuz the kids born in the ghetto
Well, there's certain things that she's like a legal alien by Genesis
And he sings in Hispanic voice
That would they play that would be totally like
That would be stupid cultural appropriation now
Anyway
We ended with a little Jim Rogers Brian we're gonna have to ask you to come back and do another podcast
What this would be more than I found him offensive?
Especially hunting on that honey. Well, we gotta make sure that you're gonna be here mentally, too. Oh, I'm here
Yeah, I'm here. But what are we talking about bands in the 70s sworn? He was like snoring earlier. No
I was not going in the middle of your monologue. Oh
Should I do it close? No. Well, no, it's you've got a moment. Yeah, you've missed a moment. Yeah. Well to be fair to be
Anyway, really I was nailing it. No, so what?
Ryan goes to bed at 8 8 30. I go to bed whenever I go to sleep. Whatever time that might be
You're an early you're an early sleeper in an early riser, which I respect
Just like Jeff Jeff gets up at 4 o'clock and he shaved his taint. No, he plucks his nose hairs daily
I should relax you have to do it every day because if you let it grow it starts turn the prickly
Yeah, then you're you're you're shorts get all baggy. Just kind of pokes everything. Yeah
Your underwear gets god it swells
It gets sweaty sweaty balls swells. Yeah, the hair gets all puffy and it starts to push out the
Train wreck it sure is
So, you know, I'm really glad we did a tribute to 50s artists tonight
How is the focus? I don't know. Nice recovery
All the fantastic of Black History Month folks out there, what do we have?
Where's my phone at? No, we do we look that there are the first three days out of the month are some actually some fantastic ones
Okay, what Michael Jackson? No, there was a guy. Bless it. Where's it at? No, actually the rack there actually one of them
Was awesome. I actually was
It was the the lady. I don't know what she
This one this was this was actually for February 3rd and this is a Ruby bridges
There we go and a room bridges was when when she bridges one six
She became the first African American student to integrate into an all-white
William France Elementary School in Louisiana, but it's what she accomplished keep going
So she asked what she was escorted to her class by her mother by US Marshals to violent mobs outside of the school
She ate lunch alone never missed a day of school her memorable through the eyes through my eyes was released in 1999
The same year that she established the Ruby bridges foundation
Which used educational initiatives to promote tolerance and unity among schoolchildren in 2009
She published the children's ruby bridges goes to school my true story. That's what you wanted. That's great
See, I mean that's a story about unity, right? She could have gone the the
You know division route
Yeah, and she did not and that's another thing about Martin Luther King
He was 100% about unity. We're not going to end on this
Black History Month day two Garrett Morgan born in 1877. Yes
Passed away in 1963 Garrett Morgan was born in 1877
He began his career as a sewing machine mechanic and went on to patent several inventions including an improved sewing machine
A traffic signal the endless traffic signals that we see now
He he made those he invented those he'd make them he invented them
A hair straightening product which you know evidently Shawn needs
I mean you must have eaten it because it comes out your hair is all straight
No, Jeff needs it in a respiratory device that would later provide the blueprint for World War I gas masks
So he's he was born when 1877 1877 and died at 63
1963 that's a long time so then there's uh
Right 80 something. Yeah, well 67 would have been 90. Who's who's a mathematician here?
What do you mean?
1877 so he'd be 83 1963 go
Actually 84 80. Yes, you're struggling
86 20 I think
Wow. All right. We'll do one more. So Bessie Coleman Bessie Coleman is a pilot. We're gonna end on this
1892 1926. We didn't live very long god bless Bessie Coleman was born in 1892 and received her pilot license in 1921
In 1922 Coleman became the first black african-american woman to make a public flight
Coleman entertained audiences with her aerial stunts until her death in 26 from an accident during a rehearsal from an aerial show
She died in an aerial show. That's heartbreaking. How old was she?
Uh, 26 did they uh, that's 1926. So it was uh, 26 plus eight. So that's uh
34
Is that right? She was 34. Is that affirmative? We need a fact check. We have a
Was it was it accidental?
I mean it was accidental
Yeah, it was during the aerial show. So well, yeah
Conspiracy on there. I didn't know if there's any conspiracy theory or something
Oh, yeah, yeah, there's our closing music. Oh soak it up people. This is talent right here
Talent on loan from god. This is me personally me. You're yours truly on the casio on the casio
Playing with his penis
What?
All right. Do you have all your fingers on the on the keyboard or you just one punking it like a
Like a typewriter
In pecking it. Are you hand picking it? I was I don't know. I don't know how many fingers I was using. All right checking out
Thanks for listening. Yes. Well, we'll catch you next week. Hey, thank you. Thanks for having me. I appreciate it. Absolutely. Thanks for joining
All right. See you next week. Peace out