To are we rolling are you rolling that's a
Yeah
What
theme song
So
that's Paul of the bathroom bathroom we asked him to
Basically
What's
that
I got some skills
All right well that's the precursor to our dudes like us
Tuesday January 26
Okay the hacking the hack cackling or whatever it is in the background doesn't help
Yes all right well that's what I came up with as a future a future pump up the crowd
Kick off the podcast that pumped everyone up just right now
Absolutely I'm right I haven't even had a chance to drink to sample this I'll take a good sniff
What is this what are we drinking this is that's what I was about to pull up I was going to discuss
Where's the bottle I've got a picture of it so we don't continue to do it away
We don't have any control no correct we have none you have none
I didn't we're trying to start the bourbon bottles away from you yeah we're trying to start our collection
But we keep killing a bottle every Tuesday so the collection is getting into our belly
Yeah so anyway we are drinking the knob Creek small batch nine year
Very respectable burden yes hunter proof did you know knob Creek is a Jim Beam
Wow I did not know that it is and I pulled up the the mash bill because we're always interested in the mash bill
So it's the enough Creek small batch nine year bourbon was very good it's about I don't know what was it 30 bucks 35 bucks
Yeah it was under 30 bucks I think wasn't it I don't remember anyway it's tasty the mash bill is 75 percent corn
13 percent rye wow and 12 percent multi-barley too much right it's terrible sucks
No but it's very good has a very good smell odor it's very good odor and flavor as well
It's good it's good stuff smell a little brown sugar I like it Paul says he likes the caramel
That's a lot of bourbons that's that had that had that description in its taste
You know I taste on the finish I taste apple green apple I don't know if anyone else does I do it's a
Maybe I'm becoming more of a kind of sewer it's got to be worse would you what do you call it Paul a Somali a yeah there
Marked a time you finally get it right yes it does taste I mean when you don't like take a shot of it and you taste it
And these these glasses talk about the glasses because I always say it wrong Glenn can't Karen or that's how I think it says
Glenn Karen of course there's someone out there that's going to be contested this yeah of course no it's good card
And they're Scottish yeah you're saying that where's my golf ball it's going Karen dumb it idiot anyway I got a set of six of these for
Santa Claus brought them to me and there's the official whiskey drink or I'm sorry glass nice and we talked about it last time on the
Last show there's slightly mention the apple and I kind of taste some fruit and it's like a green apple it's a granny Smith
So that is what he tastes ball. I told you my taste my taste is still a little off right now. Also experiencing post covid I am
Side effects I am recovered but my my sinuses have not quite recovered so the sinuses are out your your butt still producing that oil
As you were talking about yeah that's really odd I hadn't I got through that that was a strange symptom I haven't heard that symptom
Until you had mentioned it you know they make fake it fake vanilla out of it. We're talking about beaver beaver beaver as juice secretion
Beaver as juice yes I would never have believed it. I know it's a true story. Yeah my son the oldest one sent a text or maybe it was an
Article I don't know it said artificial vanilla is made out of beaver anus juice secretion wasn't quite phrased that way but almost
Yeah and Sean and I did a deep dive going no that can't be right. It is absolutely true so that those that fake vanilla flavor that you get
In candies and stuff is actually beaver as juice. There you go. I wish they would just put that on the bottle beaver as it's called BHA badge
Yeah nice. So yeah it's a it's a very good bourbon and
We're going to kind of segue into a new section that I believe Sean came up with
Shit that bugs me or would you call it. Well you know what grinds my gears. I like chaps my ass but we can go with it. Chaps my ass. I don't give a shit
You know what fucking bothers me. There you go. I like that one. There you go. All right. All right we all have to give our things that bother me
Well Sean this is this is the inaugural session so you came up with I'm talking more like you know things that bug me like I'll give an
Example like I made a post before about things that bug me. You go to go to red Mexican restaurant. I was like ordered some chips and salsa and some queso
And the chips and salsa of course they come by the table and bring it right out there. You know you got a table full of six people in my family
One one of them eats. Oh I eat too. I mean we just start pounding down those damn chips. It's a competition and then we're finished with the chips
And this is the crack the little tiny shitty pieces are at the bottom here. Everybody's scrambling to grab the big ones right. Yeah. But I don't know what the deal is man
It's like the restaurants busy and they've got all the 15,000 waiters running around with box of these things of baskets of chips and then one brings by this popping
Piping hot bowl of queso's cassettes on the table. It says white queso and I'm like that bowl is empty of chips now.
That's what really grinds my gears. You couldn't control yourself. It makes me wait. No it's not that. It's not a matter of me controlling myself. Yes it is. It's the matter
It's the fact that they don't have the they have the lack of attention to detail when it comes to my needs. You know how dare them bring out a fucking bowl of queso without a bowl of chips.
Sorry man. Okay. First off, that's not the way it works. They bring you the salsa and the chips and they put it down and then they say would you like any queso or something something something and then they go off to take that order.
They didn't even take the order. They just put that stuff down and then you stuffed your face full of chips. Absolutely torture waiting for those. That's on you.
And you know, hey, can you bring it up and they're talking to each other in Spanish. They're like, hey, the fat bastard over there just got done chowing down on all three of the bowls of chips we sat on that table.
And you don't think it's a self control issue. No. Well, you have to compete. You have to compete with the kids because you're like, if they take one, I have to take one.
So every time they do it, you have to take one. So to follow up on that, which haps my hide is when they bring the bowl of chips out. And like you said earlier, it's just a bunch of crumbs. It's all like you just like shitty little pieces.
How am I going to do with this? Right. Like scoot my fingers through the salsa trying to get some good flavor on. Well, that's the same thing at my house. If we have bags of chips, they
What are you doing stealing my pad? But at my house, like when it gets down to like the medium sized chips, the boys move on to the next bag.
They don't throw it away. So then I go into the pantry and I'm just like my father where you waste nothing. Right. And I look to see and there's like three, there's four bags of chips.
Three of them are, you know, round so tight that you know it's all the little shitty chips. Basically chip dust chip chip dust. And so what do I do? I take all three bags and combine them because I'm my father.
You get to get a spoon and eat it. Yeah. So then I pour I pour the whole thing onto my plate and I sit there and I like, you know, I grab it like fingertips.
That's absolutely what I do every time. But my but my sons somehow didn't get that at all. They look at the bag and go, oh yeah, new bag. And they open up another bag. Their chips boiled. Yeah, they are. I mean, what the hell?
How much do you do is when you buy a new one is crinkle them and say there you go before that's even open. Yeah. See what they do. They wouldn't need to open it and go. Yeah. They go to the store and get another bag.
Oh, yeah, please. They never do that. Did you buy it all the broken chips? What am I supposed to do? But you know how you know how they always say you do whatever your parents do.
Like are you as a son always does exactly what his father does. And then when he's a grown man, he's saying the same stuff to his kids. Is that is is that still does that still inevitably happen?
I couldn't be polar opposites from I don't think two of my three sons are nothing like me. I don't think so. I think it's things that they acquire or things that they it's it's been instilled in them.
And it's a matter of time when it comes out. It may not come out in front of you. So you say that. I mean, I shared with you a moment that I saw about your other son.
Yeah, I get it. So I think that mannerisms I'm talking about like actions, like not wasting stuff or I think that's being considerate about this or that.
Well, I think that wasting stuff is a sign of the times and the kids. It's a time of excess right now.
That is I think everything's disposable.
Everything's I just go get another one. Yeah. Back in the day, you would buy something and you're like, it's not as easily replaceable. Yeah.
And you expect. Well, that's the thing you expected to take care of it. Yeah. I mean, there's stuff nowadays. Yeah. It's built to be, you know, it's disposable.
Like they get a phone every two years. But damn, take care of it. I mean, multiple times.
They've been like, yeah, I broke my TV. Sorry, Dad. What do you mean you broke your TV or fell off the end of the bed? Like whether you don't have a TV. Oh, yeah.
Kind of. But I mean, the TVs are now like, you know, 80 bucks for a 20 inch. Right. You know what I mean? Yeah.
I mean, so, you know, what are you going to do? Dad, can you give me another TV? Yeah. I mean, you could be a total hard ass to say I'm a total hard ass.
Yeah, you know, I'm in between. I'm in between. Sometimes I'm a hard ass. Sometimes I mean, if it really chaps my ass, I dig in and then their eyes get big. Right.
They're like, we talking about you're not going to do that. No, I'm not. No. If you want it, you can make money and you can go do it. Yeah.
I mean, that's the age old. That's the age old deal. Yeah.
So that's kind of that's kind of what I do. But the things that chat my hide, we need to come up with a good name of that. Chaps my ass.
Just chapter things that chap my ass. How does the TV fall off the bed? I don't know what they're doing.
I mean, they want me. Maybe it's on the nightstand next to the bed and they pull the cord. I don't know what the hell they do.
I mean, but these things are like they're not like rock solid. I mean, they teeter on a little flimsy plastic little stand.
But still, that TV's never fallen over. Well, because I put this is not on the bed. Well, no, because I put the stand on.
I was very, very well installed. Did you solder it?
Soldered it. Come to think of that, I had those lights that you put under your cabinets in the kitchen and the wire meant bar.
Well, no, in the kitchen and the wires fell off. So it needs to be re soldered.
I don't have a soldering iron. I used to. I think I do. I've got several here. I had one and I believe I smell a lot of vanilla and caramel in this bourbon.
I'm sorry. Continue. That's tasty. So can you come over and solder my lights so that my under cabinet lights work? Your undercarriage.
If you need it. You want me to jostle your undercarriage and solder some stuff? So what you guys call it these days?
Solder my stuff. What are we talking about? Your undercarriage. That's it. Low voltage stuff, right? Yeah.
Anyway, we kind of got off track there. What chaps my ass? This is going to sound stupid, but it really, really chaps my ass.
Every single time I pull a section of paper towels, it rips the corner off. You know what I'm talking about? The bottom corner.
So when you're yanking, it doesn't pull the full sheet. It never tears like a solid sheet down the whole dotted line all the way to the bottom.
It always tears at the bottom corner. It crawls all over me. So you have like 90 percent of a piece. It just bugs the shit out of me.
And that's a stupid one, but it really does. It makes me like, dude, really? Seriously? You're going to care about that? But I do.
One thing that bugs me that I think it's a personality thing. I'm going to lean on the whole paper thing. The correct way to put the toilet paper back on the roll.
What are they? My mind? What do they say? There's two terms. You are a outer or inner or something.
You're talking about whether it rolls out front or rolls out back. Yes. I'm in the boat that it has to be out up front. Me too.
And I change it every single time. And my wife has never made a comment. I don't know if she has ever noticed.
It bugs me. My entire marriage. Every single time she puts it on backwards, I fix it immediately. Yep. Same here.
And she has never said, oh, there you go again. I've been waiting for her to go. Why do you do that every time? She has never said a word.
She probably doesn't even notice. She doesn't even notice. I don't care. But I saw something.
I saw a picture where they said the patent or something for the either it was the toilet holder or the toilet or the tissue. The very first picture of it showed it over the front.
So people are. Picture right there. See? Beards are cool. Mullets are bad.
That's good. Yeah. See, I like that. Yeah. That's a good picture right there. What are you doing there?
Looks like you have something to open. That's that's a legit one. Yeah. So that bugs me. I like that one.
That one there is kind of funny. Kind of just jammed in there. I've seen those as well.
But that's one of those that I think there's a clear line. Some people want it in the back. Some people like it. They do. Yeah, they do. They want it in the back.
Yeah. They know. Yeah. Seriously. We're back to the other thing we do is just it rolls out. It runs out of toilet paper.
That's what really grinds my gears. I'm sure it does. But it just runs out.
It runs out all together and then it sits there with an empty roll. Yeah. And then the toilet paper is like, you know, stacked up next to it. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.
That's another one. All the time. All the time. We got we got rid of the wall dispensers, you know, the little wall mounts. Yeah.
We always knock them off. Oh, yeah. What are you doing in there? You know, they're they're they're set at an inconvenient place like right.
Right. Regardless of the side of the wall, it's right by that knee. It's like whack. And it's like, man.
Yeah. So they think when I installed the new one, when I installed the new one down in the powder bath, when we redid that, I put it up higher and a little more out front.
And it's perfect. You know, I'm bigger than my wife, totally my wife. So my knees are higher and everything.
Right. She's like, why is it so high? I was like, so I'm not banging into it. She's like, oh, it never bothered her because she's so small. She has to stand up to pull it.
Pull the toilet paper. She has to jump up to get it. Yeah. Jump. Can you help me here? Yeah.
So I purposely in reinstalled the one. Oh, God. The tape would be terrible.
Duck tape. We're looking at pictures of toilet paper rolls. That'd be an interesting one. What is that? Go scroll down. Scroll down. What is that?
Down a little bit more. A little bit more. More, more, more, more.
A gun. One more. Right there. What is that? The one in the very center of the screen.
No, not that. Above that right there. What? That's a finger.
So there's a hand with the middle finger up. And I thought someone sat on it. But no, I actually set the toilet paper on you could if you wanted to, I guess.
Well, if you have an edge, I find it amazing that all these people have created these interesting toilet paper holders.
I mean, the reality is, if you want to customize your house to be like as cool or eccentric or eclectic or whatever the word is, I mean, you yeah, you could find you can find just about anything you can imagine for any possible purpose. Right.
That's cool. I've never even seen these customized different toilet paper roll holders.
Cool.
Although I did see the one that has the beverage holder. Did you see that one? So close that out of that.
I think some things that beer holder and a glass holder. I think those are fantastic conditions to not just the toilet paper dispense program, but just the overall general bathroom.
I think that they need to have a little arm where you take your phone and you're able to set it on there. Well, they had those maybe some induction charging at the same time.
They had that they had pictures of it. There you go. Good idea. I should have like a little little cabinet with some snacks.
How long you plan on spending in there? Well, I don't know. Sean sets up basically a movie theater whenever he goes in to take a crap.
That's just wrong. Looks like after the the concert we went to and he took a dump there at the holiday end.
He had like essentially surround sound and full screen TV in there with him. Nice.
All right. Now we're looking at custom toilets. All right. Well, let's let's move on to the next thing that chaps our ass.
Is that a camel toilet? That is interesting. I don't know. Like I said, you can.
That looks I would not sit up. I don't know if we're ready for this, but I mean, I'll tell you what really bugs me are these these toll roads.
We're surrounded here where we are. We're surrounded by toll roads. The fact that you can't get anywhere in your own town would happen to pay for it.
Correct. Yeah. And look, don't get me wrong. I don't mind paying a toll. I don't mind doing my part and take care of the infrastructure.
But there comes a time or a point where you're kind of like, all right, well, it's fucking paid for.
Well, there's supposed to be a purpose to it. Yeah. It's not supposed to be to make money.
Well, that's just like, you know, that the the North Texas Toll Commission or total association and TTA North Texas Tollway Association.
So they they basically they're like, yeah, well, we're still making it, but that money is going to fund other things like the upkeep and maintaining of the roads.
And and I don't disagree with that either. I'm just thinking, all right, well, once it's once you reach a certain point where the road is completed in that section.
Yeah, I think the toll should drop in that section. Well, the Dallas North Tollway has been there for what, 30 years, 40 years.
It's been oh, I don't know when I first started. It was here when I moved here.
Almost 30 years ago, it was already here. Yeah, I've been here since 94. I was here in 93 and they were already here and it only went so far.
Yeah, they've extended it multiple times. They've extended it, but it was in place. That's when they used to have still have toll booths.
And you know, all that stuff is supposed to be audited and like there's a board, a finance board. And I mean, it's all the house. It's all hogwash.
Is that a racket? I mean, these people just pass it. You don't know. It's kind of like the I mean, it's kind of the Dominion voting machines.
You're trusting that they're doing it right. Yeah, I don't trust those at all.
But you know what? COVID, I wonder what COVID did to the tolls because I'm sure it hurt. It hurt everything big time because I it probably dropped by six, 70 percent.
Probably. Have you noticed have they increased the tolls because of that to try to make up lost revenue?
I don't know. No, whoever looks at it, right. It automatically gets sucked out of your on to your credit card.
I know. But you know, you look on the increments of 40 or 80, you know, never know. They you just you brought up an interesting point a couple of weeks ago.
You're saying that they're they charged you anyways. Yeah, dude, I've never I haven't been on the toll road for you know.
Well, I guess that's not true. I guess I do take it to like go to lunches or something. But but damn.
I mean, yeah, I get I mean, usually it only pulls if it if you're running low.
You know, you're not going to get a $100 a month. Right. And then boom, I got hit with an $80, $80 like told told I would you know, renewal.
You're not certain that that was one of your kids driving.
Well, I don't think they're on tolls in College Station or whatever.
But I guess that that sticker is good on basically every toll road. Yeah.
I know. So if they go on road trips, I mean, the point is that in Houston, the point is we I need to be I need to be looking at it.
I need to be looking at it. I need to be looking at it. I need to be looking at it. I need to be looking at it.
You know what is charging me? I mean, because yeah, I mean, it's blind trust, man.
Well, I did. How often do we have that blind trust about a lot of things? Yeah.
I mean, do you guys check every single charge of your credit card? No. And it's we did.
My wife does every single charge. She'll pull it up and she'll look and she'll ask me.
She goes, what's this? OK, well, I understand. I mean, I do that for things that are like, I mean, like a $30 charges, 40 buck charges.
My wife asked me all that she looks at all the time.
Well, I mean, if something does like keeping your checkbook, you know, your checkbook.
I mean, it takes if you do whatever the other day, you just look.
Those are all good. Right. I remember that that that that's what she does.
She just looks at it. I get it. And when she sees something that maybe I did right that she wasn't aware of, I went out to lunch and she goes and it comes up.
You know, it always comes up weird Hooters. Who went to Hooters?
So like the parent company will come up. Right.
And you're like, Wings USA. Yeah. What is that? And I was like, and I'll try to remember.
I was like, oh, this was this or something like that.
I got sit and spin convention.
Did you did you guys know that story about when Hooters first opened in Frisco?
They called it Wings. Yeah. Well, I mean, the parent company is something like that. Wings USA or something like that.
Right. And so the Frisco City Council did not know that it was a Hooters.
They did not know. They just thought it was like this, you know, wing bar, wing, wing restaurant.
They wouldn't give them a liquor license. That's exactly right.
They denied them a liquor license once they found out. Right.
And so they gave away free beer, free beer. Yeah.
And so but this was the funny part.
Like I didn't know about all that drama going on because we don't I don't go to Hooters, but whatever.
And so I'm driving down the road on Preston and I look up and there's a one of those airplanes with a big banner and it's orange.
And all it says is we have it. Right.
And I'm thinking, what is this all about? They got their liquor license.
And it didn't say Hooters. It was a orange banner because it was a restaurant. Right.
And it says we have it. And I was like, so I did a little bit of digging.
It didn't take long to figure out what that back story was. Right.
So anyway, it's interesting. I mean, I'm not I'm not impressed with Hooters.
I've never I never have been. I think the food I think if you if you want to support you being fat, it's it's entirely unhealthy.
Of course. They are once every I mean, I think I go there maybe once or twice a year.
Right. Yeah. We'd go when the boys were still here.
They love the chicken wings. So we would go probably once a quarter maybe. Yeah.
And, you know, my wife would go and she she doesn't like the buffalo wings.
She doesn't like spicy. So she'd get a salad or something like that.
She doesn't have any issue with the whole skimpy waitresses and all that.
See, my wife is not as skimpy as it used to be. See, my wife hates restaurants.
And those are restaurants. It's not as she hates.
It's not as skimpy as the real world now. I mean, yeah.
I mean, shit, that used to be like people don't dress like that.
Yeah. Now you're not going to come on Twin Peaks or Tilted Kilt or Tilt.
What is it? Tilted Tilted Kilt. Yeah. Yeah.
Tilted Kilt or there's another one over there.
You know what they're wearing. You're not going to find that people aren't wearing that stuff.
No. But Hooters Hooters. Yeah. They're short shorts and a tight shirt.
But it's it's it's not as bad as it's not as bad as it seems to it as it used to be when it
when it first came out, you said, Oh, my God. Oh, my wife.
Vagina is hanging. My wife is. Wow. Wow. Where'd you go?
It's called Flappers. Oh, wow.
Wow. That's pretty skimpy.
If that's hanging out, Jeff wins. Wow. That was. Yeah.
That was a little over the top. So, no, I mean, like I said, we we we don't really go anymore
because the kids are gone. But I stopped getting the chicken wings
because every time I'd get them, I'd feel like I was going to explode.
I can't eat this crap anymore.
You know, there are some guys that get so wrapped up in that stuff, though,
wrapped up in like, you know, a waitress there.
I used to work. I worked with this guy. Yes, I work with this guy
that he would go there every single day for lunch.
And it would be the same girl.
And she would like, you know, write on the receipts like a little heart heart.
Yeah. She'd be like, you know, so good to see you.
Hope I see you soon. You know, all this kind of stuff. Well, he this guy is a dumbass.
He obviously had a thing for her. Right. Right.
Has some sort of fantasy that, you know, he was going to run off with the Hooters girl.
Well, was he single? No. So he was. Yeah.
So check this. So his wife goes into his truck and opens up the glove box
and it's stuffed full of every single receipt from from Hooters.
And he's there every single day and sometimes for dinner.
He's keeping them because they were all like important to him.
All the little hearts. And I know. Right.
And so she found this wad like the glove box stuffed full of these receipts.
And she was like, what? You know, WTF. Right. You know.
And yeah, I don't I don't know if I think it did lead to their divorce.
I don't know. I don't know what happened. But here's he's creepy.
I mean, anyway, but my point is there are there. That's what these guys do. Yeah.
They get all wrapped up in this and they like, you know,
try to convince a waitress that they need to run off with them.
And well, it's just like these guys that go to the strip joint sometimes.
I think this girl really likes me. She likes the money in your pocket.
Right. As soon as that runs out, as soon as that runs out,
she's going to like the guy next to you because he has money. That's right.
They they they play a good game in the in the waitress at Hooters
or wherever this restaurant is.
They know how to work it to make the tip.
Bitches ain't shit, but right.
Just like how the strippers know how to work it to get the biggest tip. Yeah.
You know, I have no problem with that. You know, you go in there,
but they know how to work it out of work and you have to and as a patron.
And it's all a game.
But there are some guys that don't don't get it.
Like they don't they don't see that or they're so miserable in their own lives.
They're so lonely. I mean, really loneliness is probably a big part of it.
She's paying attention to me. Right. Wow. Look at this girl.
Yeah. This huge sack. Yeah.
She's got cherry tomatoes and grapes and carrots and blueberries. Nice.
I got just about every color you can think of in there.
Oh, you've got blueberries. Yeah. Kind of kind of the reddish orange.
I don't see any greens or yellow.
Oh, that'd be green. Green apples. Blueberries are kind of soft.
What would you put in there that's green?
Celery. Oh, yeah. I guess that would work.
There's some sliced up green pepper. So green.
I'm not a big fan of eating raw green peppers.
I like the I like the little sweet peppers that you could buy the yellow and orange and red ones.
Are they usually in like a little bag?
I thought it was a jar like a little bag like this merged in some sort of water or something.
Kind of a juice. No, they're fresh. And you just they're very they're not the peppers.
But you know, the green pepper can be very strong, I think, flavor wise. Yeah.
But these are really good. They're sweet. Well, red and red and orange peppers are good raw.
I like those. Yeah.
Well, don't forget, I brought a 12 pack of.
Modelo, Nega, yes, Negro. Excuse me.
How do you pronounce that? Negro. Negro.
Negro. It sounds like that's be phonetically wrong.
It's Negro, isn't it? Isn't it there an A or is there an O at the end?
It's N.E. Oh, is it Negro?
I don't know. Negro. Negro. Look at it. It's just not a hard R.
I know that. What? What? What?
I said, what? What did you say? Good God, man.
I like the commercials, Mr. Producer. I like the song.
They play those commercials.
But I have to time stamp.
He went straight for the word Negro. Yeah, it is hard.
It's Negro Modelo. Yeah, you're correct.
We're talking about why we even have this debate. Yes, of course, is Negro Modelo.
I'm not going to.
Huh. Interesting. I like it, too.
It's it's a tasty beer. I like the Modelo Negro.
See, Negro. Yeah. Modelo, Negro. I was right.
Well, hold on. They say it both ways. Look right there. Top on Modelo, Negro and the Negro Modelo.
But it has an A on both of them instead of an O. Yeah.
So it's a I think they're two different beers.
Oh, they're two different beers, man. No, yes, they are.
Look at the look at the bottle.
Now there's Modelo regular and then there's Negro Modelo.
Well, the second one second one down is the beer advocates.
They just typed it in wrong. Yeah, I think so. So you go to the actual Modelo
website. It's Modelo Negro. So anyways, I brought a 12 pack of that.
OK, and I just want to let you know, I brought a 12 pack of that. So we'll be
shifting gears into the the Negro Modelo. You know what I'm sick of seeing?
One of the things that chast my hide is all that Facebook shit.
Verify age via Facebook. They have to. It's the law.
No, I understand that. But it's the Facebook aspect.
It's tire. It's tying all that shit together so they can have more data, more data.
Oh, the verify age in Facebook. Oh, it's the fact that they have our data.
Yes. Yeah, I got you. And I do know on the on the heels of the whole censorship
and all that kind of stuff. It is not that they could censor anything they want.
Now they know everything about you. They can boot you off of this for being
for knowing certain aspects of your.
Well, it's going to turn on them. I think you think it will.
I think they have a I think they have a corner on this shit, man.
And I think most people don't care. I will. I care.
And I think there's a I think after this election and what they did to what Twitter did.
Block and Trump. I think a ton of conservatives.
Did you hear what they just did today? No, that Mike Lindell, they permanently banned him.
My pillow guy who's a very big break.
He's a conservative and outspoken. He's also touting the fraudulent election.
So, yeah, so they permanently banned him today and they're trying to this to the
to the Twitter mob is trying to basically put his company out of business.
Yeah, I know. And I say bring it. What happened to Goya when they tried to do Goya?
What happened when they tried to boycott Chick-fil-A? No, I know.
I can bring it, man. You bullshit. You got 40 percent.
Thirty five percent of the people who don't have anywhere near the money.
The difference when between the Chick-fil-A and Mongolia is that now Facebook and Twitter
have these new logarithms where they can detect them faster and yank it.
So they won't we won't be able to campaign for this pillow because I haven't heard that.
I heard it today on the radio. I knew it was coming.
I saw I read the writing on the wall and the guy was getting interviewed on.
Gosh, what I can't remember what program it was.
And he's like, yes, sales are up dramatically. Absolutely.
That's what happened to Goya. Yeah.
I mean, it's going to make my pillow go through the roof.
Yeah, it's making me think about because I need a new pillow.
So I think about absolutely I'm going to look at it.
Well, they're going to probably cut his website.
Oh, yeah. I'm sure Amazon is going to kind of make him go to another another website
or something. I don't know.
It's the censorship is out of control, man.
It's you know, there was I did see there was one comment where they're like, given the Democrats.
I'm sorry, the Republicans are hard time because they're making these claims where well, the Democrats are trying to.
What is the word when you get rid of insects?
Terminate. We're trying to exterminate the Republicans.
And they are conservatives. Yeah.
It's a bona fide statement. Yeah.
So I have no idea how we got there.
Which part Goya? No, I can't remember.
Oh, we were started with toll roads and we ended up on my pillow.
My pillow.
Well, that's where the show goes.
Yes. So, Sean, what kind of beer you drinking there?
Paul brought his variety pack and I was digging.
I was digging up the whole Trump or he is a huge, huge Trump supporter.
I know, but the picture is kind of holding Trump's.
So that was not a variety pack.
That was I was trying to pull together six beers. You created a variety pack that you brought over.
Yes, I was. I pulled the six beers I had in my fridge and they were a bunch of miscellaneous shit, including a natural light.
Yeah. Well, my dad will get a kick out of that.
I tell you, there's a there was a time where I tell I could afford in natural light being the fridge.
My dad would come over and make fun of me.
Hey, what the hell is this natural light? What was the first beer that your that your dad let you try?
My dad didn't drink beer. So he never gave me he drank wine.
Yeah, he never drank beer. But did he let you try wine?
No, not really. Yeah, my dad didn't either.
And he found out I drank. No, he didn't. No, he didn't.
I mean, I moved out before I started. My dad never let us drink.
He I came home drunk a couple of times and he kind of let it go.
And but it's never like we had beer at the house and he was like, hey, you want to go ahead and get one of that.
Yes, I never never had never had beer in the fridge ever.
We'd have maybe we'd have a lot of money.
So, you know, they get a glass of wine on the weekend, maybe or a bottle of wine or a box of wine boxes back then.
Yeah, the I can't remember who makes it.
But you know, the box. Yeah, Francia.
So we'd they'd get that. And I never snuck it.
I never I never I don't want to face the wrath for one thing.
Yeah. I know. What do you say that?
What kind of wrath did your father do? Was he was he abusive? No, not at all.
I think he was just he was just stern. No, it's not verbal at all.
It was just I think the thought of disappointment. Yeah. Is was kept me away from it.
Right. You know, he was not verbally abusive physically, anything like that.
I got spanked and he wants growing up. Yeah.
But it was the I get grounded. I got grounded a lot.
But so basically, it was a lot of respect.
You wouldn't do it. Correct. It was. That's good.
It was it was out of respect and the didn't want to just disappoint him.
And like I said, I get grounded.
It wouldn't be like for a day. It'd be for a month.
See, that's that's over the top.
It makes no sense to be grounded for a month.
It worked for me. Yeah. But look at you. I know.
I mean, you're very quirky. I'd rather deal with that than.
I'm just kidding. God, I got to eat shit and dialogue from Sean over here.
I was just like quirky.
You think about that, dude, from some show, Wonder Years.
Oh, bloody, oh, but the life goes on.
That's a Beatles song. Benny Hill.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
I talk about what was a little the retarded or I'm sorry.
Oh, special needs. What is he called? I have no idea.
What is that called? I can't even think.
What's what's it's not retarded. What is the new thing?
What's it called? Sean.
Oh, I don't know.
What do you talk about? Needs impaired impaired.
No, when you're retarded, what is that called?
I got a complete brain fart now.
I mentally impaired.
Oh, fuck. Special needs.
Is it derogatory? Is it?
What is it called? What's the official word like midgets?
They're called little people.
So what is what is the retarded?
What are the retarded people called now? Now?
Yeah, they're challenged. The politically correct word.
Yeah, they're mentally challenged.
No, no, no, because there's all kinds of mentally challenged people.
If you want to get specific about that, what is the retardation called?
I have no idea. I know you're making it sound like we should know this is like on the tip of our tongues.
But I mean, well, I mean, if you see a kid that's got what is it called?
Special needs. No, Down syndrome.
OK, that is a very particular. Is it?
Yeah, very particular form of mental retardation.
Oh, so you said it, too. So but I didn't call them a retard.
There's a difference. I said retarded.
Oh, he's one of those retards. I did not.
So mental retardation. That's that's what it is.
That's what they used to call it.
All that means is slow.
When you retard something, you try to slow down.
They had they had developmental issues, yes, to where their brain is not.
But there's specific issues.
I mean, because you can have Tourette syndrome. That's considered a mental issue.
Oh, yeah, I guess so.
So, I mean, if to get specific about it.
A brain issue, I guess.
Well, there's certain types of mental retardation and Down syndrome is one of them.
It is one of them. Many.
So there are many mental retardation things.
Correct. Yeah, classes and or not classes, but different types.
Sure. Right. Huh. Yeah.
Well, I mean, the more you know, I've just you know.
Yeah. You you want to be able to just call out different types of I just I think it's stupid that I mean, if if midget if little people get offended by do they get offended?
First of all, I would imagine.
I think the woke crowd gets offended for them, of course.
But that's retarded.
I mean, there you go. But that's stupid.
You know, and that's just it. If I say that's retarded, I'm not calling them mentally challenged.
I'm just saying that's been the thing I've always struggled with.
I mean, yeah, it you know, it's just a term.
It's like saying, yeah, that's shitty.
Well, I mean, you're not saying it's covered in shit.
You're just saying it's not cool.
Right. Yeah. Right.
And when you say that's retarded, you're saying that that's it doesn't make sense.
You're not absolutely in no way, shape or form.
Is it meant to be insulting to, you know, to somebody who is mentally or physically challenged or just like if you say that's gay?
Right. I don't mean that it's homosexual like the golfer who who called himself with a ball of fag.
Did you hear about that? No. Oh, they're tearing him up.
He's losing sponsors and all sorts of stuff.
He had like a one foot putt and he missed it and he muttered under his breath because, you know, they have these microphones that are like a fricking pointed right at you.
Parabolic microphone. Exactly.
And he missed it and he goes fag under his breath.
So he called himself he called himself or the ball a fag.
And he had to like he got blown up and he was having to apologize.
You know, it was so I would never apologize.
I know he was like it was so insensitive.
And I you know, I'm fully supportive of and I'm sure the gay community.
I'm sure I'm sure gay men.
I'm sure gay men that are like golf fans were like shut the fuck up.
Who cares? You know, Lou, he made no disrespect to a gay man.
His name is Louie.
The comedian has a comedy set where he talks about how he calls someone a faggot and he's not calling them gay or disrespecting the gay people.
Right. It's like I get it.
You know, don't be a faggot. Stop being a you know, don't be.
Stop being a big whiny little faggot.
You know, I hate I hate that we've gotten to a point in our society where everything you say is assumed to be a direct slight or something deliberately offensive to some portion of the society that consider that word offensive.
It's bullshit, man.
Because basically you can't speak yet. You have to really watch your words these days.
Absolutely. And it's it is it is frustrating.
Well, on a professional platform, things that chat my hide a grind me grind my gears.
Jammer jaw.
I'm saying God. So let's get back on the handlebar bear cartoons because I know I know Paul really liked.
I've been some mercatroyd. Yeah. So get back to the the first beer again. I never drank with my dad or I have now. But growing up, never shared a beer really wine or anything like that. The first beer I had was at a party high school party.
And my first beer, I distinctly remember this. It was Little Kings Cream Ale.
The little the coming green bottle ale cream ale that sounds gay. Little Kings Cream Ale. They came in seven ounce bottles or seven and a half ounce bottles out of all the beers that were available to a young crowd at a high school party.
What? Why would that be there? That was a super cheap, super cheap. And this was up in Cincinnati.
I pulled it up. Seven local beer. You can find it down here. It's a it's a total wine.
Little Kings Little Kings Cream Ale and it's a green cream, not green cream. Cream. OK, cream little little Kings Cream Ale little creams little creams.
Oh, look at that little creamer. There you go.
Look at it. Don't click on the images. A little green bottle. God.
Jeffrey Epstein episode. There it is right there.
That bad little seven ounce bottles and stuff. Yeah. Well, they used to. I don't know if they still do. But you could buy like I don't know. It was a case of them.
Was it any good? I hated it, but it was the first beer ever had. I was like, this is terrible. Terrible.
And the first beer I so the beer, my dad let me try with Strode. Oh, good Lord. Hold on. Back up. Yeah. Sixty. Look at a tankard of that little Kings.
A sixty four ounce one where it's the center right there. But look at that. Oh, it's a good two liter Lord.
It's a what do you call that? It's a it's a two liter. No court. No. What's it called? It's called a growler.
I guess it's a growler. Well, you know, sixty four ounce growler of Little Kings Cream. Yeah, you can find it here locally.
I'm tempted to get it. Is it good? I haven't had it since then. I bet it's a light. Yeah.
I bet you. I bet you it's not as bad as it looks like a one in the memory.
The memory you have of it. It's been around for, again, a really long time.
And it was big where I grew up. There's Cincinnati right there. That bridge behind is a Cincinnati bridge.
So it was I don't know if it's made there or if it's a regional beer or anything like that.
And those turquoise aqua fingernails. Yeah. Look at the size of that.
Seven fluid ounces. It's a contrast. It's just really it says seven point five fluid ounces.
Right. That's a small one. I hope it's cheaper. Wow. So what do they say by a woman holding this seven ounce bottle?
Is that designed for women? I don't know. I don't know. That's racist.
It's a sushi beer. So maybe I'll pick up a six pack.
Huty Delight. That was the other one. I pick up a six pack of the sixty four ounces.
Huty Delight Blatz. That was another one. Those are all Cincinnati beers.
Oh, God. So I guess little I don't know if Little Kings is made there or not.
Where's it made? Brood.
Or brood or whatever. It's good to be king.
Yeah. I mean, now you have to pick that up at Total Wine and we have to try it.
Yeah. This is the Tavern Troll soon.
Cincinnati. Yeah, there you go. That explains it. So maybe that's why it was because it was everywhere.
And every little convenience store, Ponykeg. Sure. Everywhere.
So that's what we got. And yeah, Huda Paul, Shannon Lane.
That's who makes it. Yeah. And I haven't had it since then because I was just so terrible.
Yeah. Paul, what was your first beer? My dad. Let me try.
Stros equally as bad, I'm sure.
But it was a light beer. And I've always been a fan of light beers.
But I tell you what, when I went to a party like my first high school party that I drank at and it was a Budweiser.
Just the you know, the you're like, God, this is thick. Yeah.
The white can with the red lettering. It was disgusting. I couldn't finish it.
Yeah, I couldn't finish it. And then I became I became.
Was it was it the 80s? What Budweiser? Budweiser? The Stros.
Yeah. Stros would have been early 80s. Well, like 80, you know, four eighty five.
I was like 14 or 15. I would my dad let me try some of his Stros beer. It was good.
It was that gold can. Not the blue one, but the gold can up in the upper right.
Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. How many of you had a beer can collection growing up?
I never did. I was big again.
Maybe it was a local thing, but I had a beer can collection. I had wasn't really much.
It was like 50 different cans and I was like different different.
Yeah. Stros was one of them. And there's really unique ones in there.
And I don't know. I was probably 15 when I was doing it. I have no idea where I got them.
Oh, you didn't drink them. No, I didn't drink them.
So I was like, I remember where the hell I got them. I wonder if I.
You went through the neighbors trash cans. Possibly. I don't know.
We thought some hustlers that way. Wow. Are you serious?
You were going to neighbors trash.
It wasn't me that went through it. It was some kids in the neighborhood went through it.
Of course, word spread. And they say, you know, there's three hustler bags
and we're huddled around in the woods behind the house.
You know, you were in your neighbors, neighbors, garbage can trying to collect
your friend's mother's toenails clippings.
It was fairly specific. I think you did that. No, I saw that on a show.
I was trying to think which show that was.
Family guy. It was Craig. He did that.
He would collect loz's fingernail or toenail clippings.
So so we found we found some hustlers that way.
And I remember in high school we had a newspaper drive.
It is gross. Were they like all crusty and the pages were all stuck together?
I don't know. I don't remember. But I remember us flipping through and going, oh, look at that.
That's when some some wife said, what the hell do you have these for?
I just had them from college. Get rid of them.
And they're like from last month. So crazy.
I mean, I tell you, I don't know where the the hustler Playboy
to penthouse magazine program has gone.
I know Playboy. Yeah, Playboy doesn't do all nude anymore.
It's all it's different. It's not nude at all.
They decided to go. It's weird. It's like a GQish type thing.
It's a men's magazine. Was this after Heffner died?
Yes. Or even before? Yeah, it wasn't that long ago.
I want to say it was within two years. I think they still have models, but they're not nude.
Oh, dude. Are they nude?
I just saw a little splash on there about YouTube has extended Trump's suspension.
They already said they were going to.
Yeah. So they have pictures like that now. Just busty women in clothing.
Yeah. Excuse me.
But I remember there was a time in high school where we were doing a newspaper drive to where you'd
everyone bring up their old magazines and newspapers and someone dropped off a bunch of Playboy mags.
They did. And there was a joke. I was a big nose, a big semi trailer.
I'll take care of this. There's a big semi trailer and the people just come up to her throat.
And then, of course, you would take it to the recycle bin and you'd get a charity.
It was for the something in the high school where you get credit or something like that for being
charitable. So is it a recycling drive? So it was a recycling drive.
And it was newspapers specifically in magazines.
And I remember I think me and my buddies were in charge of manning it for hours.
That was my that was my oh, I hear it again. Yeah.
And so we get up there and we started, you know, kind of throwing them to kind of organize it.
Yeah. And we just we uncover the mother load of just porno mags.
And so those didn't make it to the recycle.
Oh, no, they made it to the back of our car. But you're much of.
Juveniles. It was well, we were again, 15 of course, 16.
And all of a sudden the height of wanting those kind of there's 30 mags and you're you with your five buddies.
You're like you're trying to negotiate who gets what.
All right. Right. I don't want busties. I want the Latino doll or whatever.
Right. So you're you're negotiating and trading and you know,
and I guess the Internet killed all of that. Yeah.
It completely killed all of that. Sure did.
Because porn and this is sad, but porn is like so readily accessible for all ages.
Right. I mean, you got fricking nine and 10 year olds that can look up anything, anything they could possibly want.
Hell, I remember we were looking up picture legit, legit images for like the students, you know, for my kids, a project at school.
I mean, they'd be like eight, nine, 10 years old and we would be looking at pictures and out of like in a hundred pictures,
there'd be one some some porn picture or some nude picture.
I'd be like, damn, sorry, son. You know, he'd be like looking at it crazy.
And I was like kind of quickly, you know, getting rid of the screen, you know, some frustrating how it totally crazy accessible it all is.
Well, Google has tried to correct those kind of things. Yeah.
The only thing that you find them on mostly are like people they want to slander, like Trump's wife, you know, and any kind of Republican.
I think most of even those have been scrubbed. But, yeah, there's there's so many good fakes out there now.
Yeah, it is. I mean, you know, for one thing. All right.
You're like, yeah, I know she wouldn't do that kind of a thing.
But she's a good girl. But it it looks well done.
Oh, yeah. They call them what deep fakes. Yeah. Deep fakes.
And it's even in video like video or pictures or anything. Right.
Well, now they could do videos. Yeah. Where you could basically make a person say whatever they want you want.
And it looks real. Have you seen the footage where? Gosh, I can't remember the the actor.
He was like interviewing on Conan or something like that, and his face kept changing to Tom Cruise.
And it looked real. God, it looked like Tom Cruise was sitting there talking.
So I remember there being some debate about the future of of filming and movies, and I'm talking way into the future.
But now they can they can create. I mean, they're not quite there in terms of making like animated movies, you know, look completely real.
But at some point they will. So then at that point, you don't even need human actors anymore.
They're they're they're really good at it. Like even what is that Star Wars Mandalorian?
Yeah, I haven't watched that yet, but it's pretty good. I mean, it is. It's very good.
But but they bring a character back. I'm not going to tell you. They bring a character back.
It's well done, but they haven't figured the eyes out yet. The eyes still look wrong to me.
It's it's I don't know. I don't know about the eyes, but to me, it's it's human movement.
They can't seem to get that down perfectly.
Well, I think what they've done is they're using a real actor and they've replaced the face with a computer face.
Right. So it's actually so they have all these little probably dots over his face.
So it's an actor moving and doing everything.
But the face has been replaced and I know what you're talking about.
And it's good, but it looks like a video game quality.
Right. They the the cut scenes and I think that's what they're going for.
The eye. No, but it's getting better and better.
It's getting better, but it's still not there. It's the eyes. They haven't figured out yet.
It's still kind of it makes me wonder.
I mean, it's and I'm talking I don't know how many years from now.
Right. But at some point you won't need human actors anymore.
Well, I think you will, because if you're going to say I want to have Tom Cruise in the new Mission Impossible, but he's now 70 years old.
Right. You just get a young guy to play the body part, doing all the action and movement and everything.
You replace it with a young Tom Cruise's face.
You have a computer that can change the voice. So it sounds like Tom Cruise.
It looks like Tom Cruise. That's I think that's that's where it's going to be at some point.
They're not there yet, but I think that's where it's going. It's close.
Yeah, I don't like that. I mean, have you seen the latest Planet of the Apes that came out a couple of years ago?
Well, that's another thing that grinded my gears. Yeah, that was pretty good.
Planet of the Apes. No, the the comment when Rose.
Well, who is the actress that made that comment about that one lady look like Planet of the Apes actress?
That was Roseanne Roseanne that looked like and Valerie did look like her.
Valerie Jarrett. If you look at her haircut and the way she looks, side by side, destroyed her.
You're going to get canceled. I'm telling you, they looked they're it's uncanny.
Yeah, they it's uncanny. They destroyed her entire career. They did.
Took away took away her her reboot show, which is still on.
Still on. I'm amazed. I'm actually disappointed.
I was hoping that people would be like kind of support support Rosie O'Donnell.
I mean, sorry. Well, what kind of what kind of what kind of Rosie Roseanne Barr?
I was hoping they would support her and the show would just kind of quietly die.
But what's the what's the viewership, though? Yeah.
Or is this or is this ABC going?
I want to put it on regardless of what regardless of how poorly it's doing.
Yeah, because we're not going to let her win. Correct. Yeah.
That might be the case. We quit watching. I was watching the show.
And we watched it. The first season was gone.
Yeah, we watched it that first season. It was.
But once she was gone, I was like, I'm done. Yeah.
I wonder if some of these other shows are taking hits.
Like, what about Fox News? I don't watch Fox News.
If I knew it was taking a huge hit right now, I don't.
I've fallen behind MSNBC and CNN in certain segments.
And they're rearranging their lineup like Martha McCallum is no longer an evening.
She is like, I actually like her.
I think she's pretty well, I think they've moved her.
People, she's pretty tough. Well, I think they moved her to make their afternoon stronger.
Is that what there was? I think that's what it was, because I think the News Mac guy was a great Kelly.
Yeah, I've watched him. He is over the top.
He is, but I like him. He's good. I've watched him as well.
He is not afraid to say everybody on that show.
He even says, he goes, I'm an opinion. He admits it.
He goes, I'm an opinion reporter. I'm not reporting the news. I'm going to give you my opinion.
Yeah, well, I mean, that's what that is. He's up front.
All these pundits are opinion. But they don't admit it.
I know that. You know, he admits it.
Like, who are these idiots? Like Don Lemon or whatever his name is?
He's an op-op. I'm so sick of it.
It's all about opinion. All about opinion.
But if they admit it. It's definitely impacted my mornings.
I mean, that used to be well, it's impacted my whole day.
I mean, because I would like I would take small sections of the day and I would watch the news.
You'd watch Fox News? I'd watch The Five.
You know, religiously. It's still on, but you're boycotting the channel.
I haven't watched it since election night. I haven't either. I haven't either.
I watched it every single night. I'm not. Yeah, I haven't watched it.
And I don't think I'll go back to it. Well, and it's showing.
It's showing because Newsmax has catastrophically risen in the ratings.
Yeah. And I've downloaded the Newsmax app. You know, watch it.
It's funny that, you know, Jeff, you may have shared this.
I don't know. I heard from somewhere that the Clintons actually are one of the original folks that started up Newsmax.
And I don't know if they're still involved in that or not. I haven't heard that.
I would be shocked. Yeah.
Because it's so ridiculously like non-liberal. It's the opposite CNN.
Absolutely. Well, you know, you know, you know, the biggest reason why I bailed on Fox News
and probably will never go back is that the one jackass, Chris Matthews, was he talking about?
He's with Fox again, isn't he? So I saw him. Sorry, not the secretary.
Who am I thinking of, guys? The guy that like Chris Wallace. Chris Wallace. Motherfucker.
Well, I think he's back because I saw an article where he was interviewing.
God, who was he interviewing? Who are you talking about? Chris Wallace.
Yeah, he's a dick. Is he still with Fox? Yeah. Fuck Chris Wallace.
I thought he got completely let go. Or did he lose his show?
There's one dude that went over to CNN and was ashamed of his former Fox News.
Who was that? Yeah. Is recent. He said, I don't know how they live with themselves.
Is the press secretary that the McKinney or McCapp?
Yeah, I know you're talking about McEnany. Yeah, that one.
So she was talking about. Hold on. What is that? He'll put that back on there, producer.
Oh, you just killed it. He was talking about the Newsmax and Clinton Foundation.
If that was true. Yeah, I don't know. So that is true. No, it doesn't say that.
It just says hot topics, blah, blah, blah. No, that has nothing to do with it.
All right. So anyways, that that that announcer that was interviewing with McEnany,
she was talking about the fraud of the bread, bread, bread bear was a bread bear.
It was no it was the Neil Cavuto. Yeah. Yeah, excuse me.
It was him. What a piece of shit. He is a piece of shit. That was is he the one that went to CNN?
That was that was strike one. I don't you know what?
I don't look that up for us. Look up Fox News anchor anchor moved.
Moved to CNN. They could find a better picture than that.
I think I think it's bread bear. I don't think so, but I don't know.
I haven't watched it. Fellow Army veteran Parnell defends. No.
No, that won't help us. No, good. Oh, yeah, because it's about to say it.
Five about Fox News anchor about to move to CNN.
Is that him right there? No.
I'm looking, but yeah, nothing's jumping out at me. But it's a it's a big name.
Well, actually go to images. Maybe that might help.
Oh, it's probably her. No, it's a guy.
Oh, God.
Andrea Mitchell.
Hey, when we.
When is wrap up of first episode? We got another 20 minutes.
20 minutes. Yeah. And I don't want to I want to beat the political horse to death too much.
But Sean, start download the Newsmax app. It's free.
I got it. Oh, yeah. Watch that. I'd be surprised if you haven't already done that. Yeah.
Yeah, I just I'll tell you, it gives me no pleasure to not watch the news.
But so I watch the Newsmax. I am disgusted. I am disgusted.
I'm trying to take a break from it because it's making me nauseous. I'm disgusted with it.
I don't want to see any of it because every time I see Joe Biden's face on there, I'm just thinking this is a fucking joke.
It's an absolute ripoff of the United States citizens.
It's a ripoff. It's a he stole it. It's either.
And you know what? I would gladly. But here's the thing.
I'm not out there burning down villages. I'm not out there killing people.
I'm not out there taking away people's businesses and showing my anger that way. Right.
I'm doing the right thing. And I'm I'm taking a backseat. I just I just can't look at my wounds and trying to figure out how we can.
I just can't get over the the ongoing lies, lies, lies, more lies.
I mean, sick of it. All of it. It's all it all falls back to the same thing.
You know, we can correct all this shit with terminal term limits.
And guess who submitted a legislation for term limits today?
Who? Ted Cruz, Ted Cruz, frickin stud man.
They hate him up there and they hate him because he won't play their game.
That's why they hate Trump. I know. That's exactly why.
And just like that Josh Hawley guy in Missouri, they want him out as well. Yep.
Yeah, he's a stud. I hope he may. I'm hoping he's our next president.
We'll see what happens. He's really, really smart.
He is super smart. I think he is ultra conservative and he has amazing principles, man.
I think he can. What standard do you know would submit legislation to to limit their own power?
Well, him, because he can get a job outside of politics. All of them can.
Well, yeah, well, I wouldn't say that necessarily. Yeah, they can all get jobs, but he can.
He he's really well, he can become a judge. Yeah, he can.
I listened to his podcast during the impeachment, the first impeachment.
He's he's as good as ours. No, he sucked.
And he laughed when I that's when I realized we are going to be superstars.
We're better than Ted Cruz, better than Ted Cruz.
Dudes like us better than Ted Cruz. Don't count on that being our tagline.
No, I'm super impressed with him.
And you know, and the and the media shades him just like they do anybody else that's considered a threat.
Yep. But thanks, Mr.
Producer. Anyway, there are some studs out there still. I haven't lost all faith in in in the integrity of politicians that are out there.
But, man, I get tired of the lies. It's crazy.
And this this impeachment thing that's going on right now is a joke.
You cannot impeach somebody that's not not in office.
Well, I think Biden's even given up on it because he said he was.
Yeah, there's not enough votes. So he's kind of distancing himself from it.
But I read and you know, it's interesting. It's usually when a president takes over, especially in an emotionally charged election like that.
Right. They talk about how important it is to like set the agenda for the first hundred days.
And like, you know, and has it done any of that? Well, I think for the first hundred days,
how many of the first hundred days are they going to be dealing with this impeachment thing?
Dealing with Trump. I mean, unbelievable. I mean, that would be that would be if I'm Trump and I and I got, you know, I didn't get elected.
Right. You know, and you can throw away the throw out the fraud stuff. But I would want them talking about me.
You know, they're going to talk about Trump for the first 40 days of Biden longer.
They may talk about him through the entire term. Yeah.
I mean, the only reason why they're doing this is they're trying to keep it somehow.
I don't even know how it makes it impossible, but apparently they're trying to make it so that he cannot run for president again.
They're afraid of it's too late. Can they do that?
Even if he gets impeached again? No. Well, actually, what is the rule?
If you are impeached and you are thrown out of office, which he's not even in office anymore, is that does that keep you from running again?
I bet you it does. But what if they're hoping they are hoping that there is going to be enough senators that go along with this?
There's not to keep him from running to throw him out of office.
I don't think there is. It's unconstitutional. He's not in office. Right.
I don't understand how this even passes the smell test. And it's certainly a waste of America's time.
It is. We have bigger things to worry about.
And I was at the gym yesterday and, you know, it's like the death march of the baton with them carrying the articles of impeachment to the Senate.
Oh, damn. It's a damn joke. I was like, really? And they're all somber. And this is my favorite part.
And it breaks my heart to have to do this. But it's something that must be done. I've got my box of pens with me.
They monogrammed them or whatever. And you know, it was a racket just to go, I want to be the one to walk it. I want to be the one to walk it.
They probably fought over it. So ridiculous. You know, behind closed doors are like, you know, it's crazy.
Stick it to the man. I remember in the early 80s and we were I was living in Eaton Town, New Jersey.
And this was on Fort Monmouth. I was stationed there for my dad was in a signal battalion.
They had it's one of the big training places that they train. It was a huge fields behind the house where they do a bunch of training for signal battalion.
Shit like farmers and stuff like live fire training. They train.
You ever run around in the field while they were blowing up? They did a lot of they did a lot of athletics training.
So in the morning you'd be like, hey, oh, oh, oh, oh, military. One, two, three, four, three, two, but oh, my God, they'd be.
And I'm not exaggerating. There would be a thousand soldiers on that field doing calisthenics in the morning.
Oh, wow. In short shorts, I'm sure. Oh, go fast stripes. So you were glued to your window. Oh, I was out there like the nut sack was hanging on everything.
I remember I would play the Pink Floyd, the final cut. They've got one song track one.
I track one on the second side and they would have a missile that shoots and I put the speaker out the window and I play it so loud that they would dive.
Are you serious? I did. You're an idiot. I was.
Next thing you know, you're surrounded by like army.
You fuck. I don't know. Ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen.
So you were you were just busting people's balls from a very early.
But you know, it probably went like 100 feet before the sound is made.
So but so our house. So Eaton Town, Fort Monmouth is so close to the ocean.
I mean, it's a couple of miles from the ocean. So it literally opens up.
There's there's a mouth that comes in Monmouth and there you go.
I didn't think about that, but there's it comes in and they got these little creeks that come off of that.
And they're there's there's seawater, though, and it's sure right into the behind our houses and the development.
You have like great whites in your know, they were everywhere like that.
In fact, I want to say the freshwater is kind of weird orcas.
What they call it. They call it brackish.
So they had it mixes with saltwater and freshwater mix right there on the coast through the tributaries.
Yeah, I think they call it brackish. Don't they?
Well, brackish. So there was a bull sharks. There was a lot of there's no shot of bushes, trees right by where that creek was at.
And so we would go down there. We would skip school and we were very cute is hanging.
No, they didn't have anything like that. Octopi.
And I would take some I'd go down because they have basements there.
And I would take some of my dad's military clothes.
And I remember he would have like when he would have to go in the field, he would have the specific he had all kinds.
And I took out some like these waiters.
And I don't remember which bag I pulled them out of.
In fact, he's probably going to hear this and shoot me when he finds out that was you, you son of a bitch.
Probably. So we go. I think he could assume it was you back then.
Well, it could have been my brother, too. He was an asshole just like me.
So we would we would go out there and we would we go out there.
We make these little boats out of crates and styrofoam.
And I'm not joking. They would have like because on the other side of the creek was a commissary.
OK, and they would have these deliveries and they would have all the styrofoam laying around.
So what are you saying? You made a makeshift raft.
That's exactly what I'm saying.
And you would float around in these little brackish tributaries in this.
But this this little creek was about 30 yards wide.
But it was a couple of miles long.
And we would like go up and down the creek, pulling each other around.
And we go fishing. And I remember it sounds kind of fun.
Do they have arcturus? What the hell is that?
Oh, that's a very prominent brackish seawater fish.
That's the can you turn off his mic now?
I'm tired of his examples of peckered brackish.
That is the giant squid.
Did they have the the arcturus?
The long tailed spotted pike.
There was a very narrow part of one of the branches of the little creeks that went off.
And there was like this 10 foot two by 16 that was stretched across.
And I remember we take our fishing pole and we'd sit on that little two by 16.
And I remember I dropped a little lure in there and I saw this humongous long tailed spotted pike.
It was a giant squid. It was a huge arcturus.
It was a gigantic squid. It was a catfish.
And it was you were noodling. It was tremendous.
No, you dive on it. I did not.
It was it crawled. It just went right by me.
It crawled. It was an amphibian.
I had a sealacan for a lure. Oh, dude, I haven't heard one of those in a while.
I had a lure and I would just sit there and I was taunting it.
And so but it didn't do anything. It just went right by it.
And I was like, what the hell's up with that bastard?
Didn't even go for it. Just fucking fuck with me.
How big was it? All of a sudden, this huge snapping turtle was at least like two foot wide.
It was it was like a tortoise.
It came right by or coming after that that catfish.
It was he went after the catfish.
He was going after the catfish. Catfish was in the front.
Turtle was behind. And I was like that changed everything because I was kind of like,
I didn't realize those turtles were that big because I was swimming in there.
Oh, yeah. Those things will take a frickin foot off.
Yeah. Well, it is one of those snapping turtles bit a boy's big toe clean off while we were living there.
Oh, yeah. But his fucking big toe off to go on to get it back and reattach it.
Did they get it? Did they get it?
I don't think so. Did they hang it up, gut it?
I think it was one of those things that got the toe partially digested.
And then they found seven fingers, four thumbs.
What they did is they surgically removed a thumb and put it down on his big toe to replace it.
I would rather have my thumb than my frickin toe.
Oh, they did not. That makes no sense at all.
Of course, thumbs are way more important than big toes.
While we were out there, while we were out there,
I would say moving the big toe on to the thumb.
We found a cooler because we would go fishing.
And evidently, a lot of people were fishing out there.
Was there a head in it?
No, I didn't get head while it's out there.
Was there a decapitated head in it?
No, no, no.
You did what out there?
There was about a 12 pack or two six packs of big mouth mickeys.
There's another nasty one.
You were drinking beer?
I drank that beer because it...
But you were 10 years old.
Oh, I was a youngster.
But they were the big mouth mickeys.
We pulled it off.
It was the first time I ever had a beer.
That's a big opening.
Dude, I drank it and it went down.
It was warm.
It doesn't make that noise.
It was warm. It wasn't cold.
It was warm.
But I didn't have beer.
Gross.
I didn't get it.
But actually, it wasn't gross.
That's gross.
Warm beer is disgusting.
All right. I'll buy the Little Kings.
You get the mickeys big mouth.
And make sure they're warm.
I'll tell you what.
We drank...
I drank two of them and there was two of my other friends
and they had a couple of them.
He had them up there in the second year.
Big mouth mickeys.
Mickey's big mouth.
Well, they just had a big mouth.
It was another green bottle from what I remember.
There it is. Yeah, that's it right there.
That's not...
Okay, down.
It's multiple.
To the right. Up.
That picture with the left or two.
One more right there.
Click that one.
That's where it was where...
They call those the big mouth mickeys.
It was not a twist cap.
It was a pull tab.
And when you pull that tab off, it just opened up.
Bless you.
It just opened up.
So anyways, I mean, we used to slam soda pops and stuff.
Excuse me.
That's a Miller beer.
Good stuff.
Yeah, but I'll tell you what.
You drink that...
Oh, man.
I was hammered.
I had such a great time down there.
You were 10.
You weighed like 80 pounds.
I think I was like 12.
12 years old.
Okay, 85 pounds.
I rung 12 to 15.
Drunk as a 12 year old?
I wasn't drunk.
Being attacked by snapper turtles?
Diving on catfish.
Did not dive on those catfish.
But I tell you what, I did swim in that.
That was very alarming.
Did you swim in it after that?
No, I absolutely did not.
But I tell you what we did do, which was fantastical,
was we ended up acquiring.
Was it fabulous?
It was better than fabulous.
We acquired some bottle rockets.
One was fabulous from Jeff.
We acquired some bottle rockets, and I was like,
wow, this is fucking cool.
So we ended up taking the bottle rocket, and we shot it,
put it in a bottle, and we shot it in the water.
Into the water.
Oh, yeah, I've done that.
Shot it in the water.
It can't explode, though.
It does.
No way.
It does.
How does the water not put out the wick?
Because it's shooting out.
So the water never goes in to put the flame out.
Oh, OK.
So that's not a firecracker.
It's a bottle rocket.
So it shoots in there.
So it was crazy.
So you shoot it in the water.
And you don't hear anything.
And all of a sudden, you see a little fish.
No, you do not.
I swear to God.
Dude, that's kind of cool.
Some little fish like that.
It was very cool.
You could fish by dynamite.
It's not a eagle.
It's not.
But you could do it.
All right.
Well, all right.
Welcome.
Thank you for enduring the pre-show.
It's pre-Burban.
Is that what that means?
Pre-show.
Well, I haven't finished my bourbon.
I know.
I just finished mine.
Oh, really?
I still have a full bourbon.
This is the way it should be.
You need to imbibe on that.
What?
All right.
So are we wrapping up the first part?
Yes, we are.
Part.
We need a part something, part do.
We need a French.
What's part one in French, Mr. Producer?
Oh, wow.
Never mind.
That's not how French people say it.
I don't know what the hell just happened.
I got Sean Hawken a loogie on his mic.
OK.
Well, hey, thanks for joining us.
We're wrapping up the first part of our episode series.
Yes.
All right.
Back for part two, hearing about, I don't know, for you instantly.
Instantly.
All right.
Let's get started.