Casey Kasem with the top 40. Top 40 hits.
We can't do it like you do.
Hey Cameron.
You know I was telling Shelly how you always do the drunk commentator.
Is that the guy from the Cubs?
Harry Carrey. Harry Carrey? Is that who you do?
And so now every single time I hear an announcer in a game I start giggling
because I think of your Harry Carrey. It's like when they say six shots on goal to the Knights 8.
And I'm like, six shots on goal.
Six shots on goal and Jeff and Paul stepping up to the plate right now.
It's two out three now.
Five hot dogs.
I was explaining to Shelly why I was laughing and she was just like, what?
Speaking of hot dogs, I had a Costco hot dog for lunch the other day.
So did I. They're fantastic.
It was delicious. It was not as good because I like the onions you can put on them.
But they don't have them out there that you can put on yourself.
No.
They have little cups of them now. So I got one.
They do? A Costco cup? Cups of onions?
Yes. You have to ask for them.
Oh, I did not know that.
Well, I got a couple to put on mine so I dumped them up and they were frozen.
Oh, no.
So it came out one big blob.
I was like, all right, so I tried breaking it apart.
So I was eating this with frozen onions.
Crunchy.
They were crunchy. I was just like, this is not good.
Flick those off and start over.
I fought through it. It was not good though.
So it was a bad experience. I told my wife, I was like, yeah, this was not a good visit.
It's funny. We were leaving Costco and, you know, of course, it's a dollar fifty for a soda and a gigantic hot dog.
And I was like, you want to get one? She was like, no, I'll go with the split one.
We'll split a hot dog. She's like, was it like Lady and the Tramp?
Because we both love it.
Oh, yeah, we both. Yeah, we ate it from the opposite ends.
And we met in the middle and I had mustard up my nostrils and she had like ketchup all over her lips.
And it was like amazing.
You liked her gums.
I like the ketchup off the roof of her mouth.
Oh, my God.
Yeah, that kind of went gross in a hurry, didn't it?
Oh, righty then.
It's it's May 30th. This is the second edition of our May 30th podcast.
This is Dudes. I've got some Sean. I am Pablo.
I am Jeff. During our break during the first half and the second half, we we got to sample a tree.
We did a treat. We spoiled ourselves.
So if you guys don't know, we have an infinity bottle that we've been contributing to for an extended period.
I don't actually know how long, but it's a gigantic bottle.
Actually, I don't think it was that long.
Well, I started that maybe six months ago, maybe nine months.
It's a very precious bottle.
But it was when I when my when Julie and I re cataloged everything.
Well, you've got some new furniture and you took everything out and took it as an opportunity and you archived everything.
And then we started noticing that some of these bottles aren't as full as the rest.
Correct. And we decided we're going to empty some of them, not empty them,
but we're going to like donate them to the infinity bottle because it wasn't enough for all three of us to enjoy.
There's the key. If we pour those what's left in those bottles into three glasses, we're going to go really, really, really poor.
Oh, yeah. We'd be all bitter and irritable. All puffed up.
Yeah. Look at me. Oh, we said fine.
We'll just dump it in the infinity bottle. Well, it turns out pretty good.
So this so we did this before. I mean, we had a sample before not an affinity bottle.
We did our first sample. The first sample is good.
The second sample, even better, even better, even better.
The second sample, it was sweet. It was outstanding. It was so good.
And again, I was trying to figure out, is that an emotional response?
Because, you know, we love that bottle. No, there's so much history.
I think it's one of the better bourbons we have out there. If not near the top. Yeah, it's great.
I wouldn't even. There's no emotion in it for me.
It's all fact that fucking infinity bottle is incredible.
And how many bourbons is it a blend of twenty seven, twenty seven bottles?
So there you go. If you're listening, if you're listening and you want to make an excellent bourbon, just buy twenty seven bottles of bourbon.
And they're all over the place. Two to five ounces of bourbon.
And just mix it into a bottle and then you'll be have anything you could ever want in a bourbon.
Yes. Yeah. So we were we're kind of perusing the the quantities of the different bourbons that we're putting in there.
And I noticed there was there was one that was six ounces. There were a couple that were four, four and a half ounces.
And but the majority of them are about two and a half ounces. There may have been a lot. Yeah, it's not a lot.
And they all have contributing factors. I mean, the my overall synopsis of my taste buds, I taste a lot of pepper.
The Roman was fantastic. The overall it was very sweet. The sides of my palate were very sweet.
I mean, it was a little peppery, a little hot on the front on the front end.
You know, but the overall it was it was like it was syrup in there almost.
Yeah, it had a lot of had a really good oiliness to it. Yeah, it's really, really good. It was really good.
But we are trying one we've never tried before. That's right. And it's Bardstown. This is my first dip into it.
I just not did it. OK, this is my second. The second was infinitely better than the first.
We said it was a hard burn on the first slip. Second sip. It's actually I tasted no burn at all.
So maybe those maybe it burned off. The nose was very misleading when you first smell it.
It's like lots of flowers. Oh, yeah. It's got super sweet. Very.
Yeah, very flower aromas. The first time I did, I was like, well, that's very perfumey.
All right. It's original series bottled in bond. It is Bardstown.
It is naturally a hundred proof price.
Naturally, but well, because it's bottled in bond.
So naturally, that means it's a hundred proof. And we're at fifty dollars for a price point.
Not bad at all. And here's the match bill. Fifty sixty eight percent corn, 20 percent wheat.
Oh, it's a weeded bourbon. It's a weeded bourbon and 12 percent marted, malted barley.
So excellent. What does this 68 corn? That's pretty significant.
So I like to see corn below 70, you know, maker's mark. I think 71.
I like I like it when I like it when it hits 65 that corn, you know, that way it allows you to play with the wheat and barley a little bit.
You know, give it a little more percentages.
This is yeah, this is there's no right at all here. So it's 20 percent wheat.
And normally I thought I thought that makes it kind of softened, you know, for the bourbons.
We'll see that we did. They're usually spicy. Are they spicy?
I thought this is spicy. Well, we had it all first.
We had we had spicy chips in the middle from Whole Foods.
This is this is what I'm finding. Whenever we think, oh, it's got a high percentage of right.
That means it's peppery and spicy. Oh, it's got a high percentage of wheat. That means it's softened.
None of that is true. Well, this is none of that is true.
Every single one of these things have their own character and flavor.
And you cannot even make a generalization when you're looking at that match bill of what you think it's going to be like.
That's my personal take after all the ones we've been kind of tasting.
Yeah, because this one is spicer than some of the rice we've had. Yes, absolutely.
But the second poll, did you take a second poll? Because it's not it wasn't burning.
I'm on my third poll. Did it burn second time? Second time it did for me. Third poll.
Does that crap me? Yeah, I didn't get it. I didn't get a burn on the crab.
Could be the crab I ate for lunch.
Hmm. That's belch. Maybe that's what it was.
Scroll down a little bit. Let's see if they have any.
So we have the black label. Black label. What do they say about it?
Weeded. There it is. Right there.
All right, who's going with it?
We're watching the Weeded. The bottle and bottom presents the best locally sourced corn and wheat grains in the six year old straight bourbon whiskey.
This bourbon features 20 percent wheat mash bill creating a beautifully balanced modern expression.
Baked peaches with cream, meats, cocoa with hints of lemon and oats.
Read that again. Baked peach with cream, meats, cocoa, stone fruit. Baked peaches with cream, meats, hints of lemon.
Oh my God. You can't do it. An indulgent smooth mouthfeel of stone fruit and toffee.
I said stone fruit and you guys were like hey, stone fruit is stupid.
Well, it's pretty much in every bourbon apparently. No it's not.
I think it's a tincture. Is stone fruit a tincture that they add to every bourbon?
I think bourbon is a tincture. Yeah, it's like an eye dropper and they just kind of two drops.
Isn't a tincture some sort of magical baked peach with cream?
Some sort of medical in Dungeons and Dragons.
I don't get baked peaked with cream at all. Oh God no. It's so retarded. I don't know why they do that.
Hold on. Hold on. Pump the brakes here.
It says baked peach with cream, meats, cocoa. With hints of lemon. With hints of lemon on the top.
Shut up. It's retarded. It is not retarded because I'm going over this. Stop it.
I'm going over this. I think it's subliminal.
Well, maybe. You're like huh. It tastes like sardines and nuts.
Yeah, you're like oh that's baked peach I think I smell. Oh wait, no, no that's cream. No, that's cocoa.
Oh, that's hints of lemon. I don't taste the peaches and cream.
Yeah, I do taste that. I do taste a little peachy.
Well, the nose is the baked peach. I think stone fruit.
That's just the nose. Yeah, it's just the nose. Yeah, stone fruit and toffee.
That's the floral that I was picking up. All that being said, I'm thinking about a six, seven.
I, because of the burn and I just did a third poll and the burn is back.
Before you comment about this, why don't you tell our listeners exactly what Bottle and Bond is.
Well, that means it's been at least four years. In what?
In a white oak charred barrel. What level char?
Alligator char. No. I don't think the char is part of the Bottle and Bond.
It isn't. It isn't. But I just wanted to watch Paul Squirm.
But it has to, you know, they do. We haven't really figured out what the the regulations of something,
but it has to be stored in a government bonded warehouse, government by the Rick House Rick House.
But there's also a government recognized one. I don't think it needs be the government.
It doesn't matter. Government Rick House. Yeah, it's government bonded.
It's one that's inspected by the government.
But but but I think it also has to adhere to certain.
There are four conditions. Oh, but your computer.
Oh, no, I don't. Oh, well, go ahead there. Well, actually, I don't remember exactly.
But Hunter proves one. Yes. Number two, it's a age of four years, age at least four or two years.
And then number three is the oak barrel, Charred White Oak Barrel.
And then number four is has to be definitely in a government regulated.
That's what it is. But I think there's more to it.
I think I think there the distillation process made by one distiller at a single distillery in one season.
OK. Then aged in a bonded Rick House. OK.
Rick House. So I see. Yes, that's what they call that's where they it's a warehouse.
But how they start Rick House, but how they distill, there's no regulations about how it's distilled.
It just has to be must be made by one distiller. No blends at a single distillery in one season.
OK. So you can't have multiple seasons and shit like that.
Right. So this bottle and bond will be different than next year's.
Right. Yeah, that's cool. It is cool. I'm curious.
Theoretically, you know, this Dylan Mulvaney guy.
No, I don't know. Of course you've heard of him.
But what I'm getting at is a small part of me feels bad for him.
He did not want this to happen.
No, I don't think any human wanted this to happen.
In fact, he's probably excited about the direction his life is going.
And he's got a huge mouthful of teeth. Do you ever see him smile?
He looks like a fucking muppet. It's amazing.
I try not to really look at him.
Yeah. Well, you know, he's all over everything, but he's got tons of exposure.
But at the same time, I'm like, dude, he brought down the number one beer distributor out there.
But like, he didn't bring him down. He didn't bring him down, but they're down 30 percent.
Twenty nine point five.
Do you think he cares about that?
I think he does. I mean, I think he had a post that was pretty heartfelt.
He was like, I didn't intend for any of this to happen.
I didn't want to be divisive. I just I was excited about it.
And, you know, and they they agreed to make a can for me.
And, you know, I mean, he was actually pretty gracious about it.
I read it. I was like, well, that was a cool response.
Did you know he is a person? He is a human, right?
I mean, he has feelings like the rest of us. Yeah.
And I'm going to tarnish that a little bit.
You can't be a a an accepting human acting like a six year old girl.
I mean, to me, that's pedophilish.
I don't think it's pedophilic. Well, it might be, but I think it's just mental illness.
I mean, I just did, you know, I think he is an actor.
Did you know he was on the Price is Right?
I've seen that as a contest, though, as himself as a guy.
It was before he was doing all this bullshit.
Are you saying the Price is Right hires actors?
The Price is Right. No, I think he is an actor because he he he he won, too.
Did he? Yeah, I didn't see.
Oh, because he had this flamboyant dance. Yeah.
Mr. Producer, can you pull up your little baby prices?
Right. Correct. And he came down and he won and nobody knew who he was.
Correct. And he was being himself or an actor.
Yeah, he was right. I think. OK.
Well, how long ago was that? That's I mean, I don't think it was too long ago.
I don't know. At least being consistent about who he thinks he is.
Video. He was born in ninety six. So.
OK, well, we got a well, this is a five minute version.
Oh, there he is. Oh, there he is. He pops out there.
See if you got anything. So he's wearing like a Where's Waldo shirt. Oh, no.
And it's.
I just.
Welcome to the show. Nice to see you.
Hey, George, what's like?
Listen, a dollar, a dollar.
Actual retail price is.
Yeah. Two thousand forty dollars.
Yeah, so we could skip down to the very end of this.
Oh, my God. He gets jumped on the floor.
That's what I mean. He's an actor.
And I do musical theater.
Well, plus that energy, Dylan. We have something pretty cool for you behind the door here.
What do we got? Yeah, you entertain you.
You can't take this seriously when you see the way he's acting.
You can't take it seriously. Right.
This foosball table. It's a it's a it's an act.
It's a it's a masquerade.
It's a you know, somebody has to really when you put out that type of energy to really falsify your personality like that, you got to feel bad for them.
I mean, that's not it's completely fake.
And I mean, I mean, there are other tones of happiness there, but you could see through all that.
I haven't I haven't watched anything that tells me if if they're consistent, you know what I mean?
If they're if they're consistent or he or she or is consistent in behavior.
He is he consistent in that behavior?
I mean, all the time. I don't know.
Like he is what he's saying. Right.
So when he gets home, he's kind of like Rufus.
What did you do? Shitting on the floor here?
He's talking to his dog. He's actually got a really deep watching NASCAR.
I think that's probably the first Bud Light he ever drank.
I don't know.
I think only him and or his family.
I think I'm going to try out for some of that NASCAR Bud Light commercial.
That's so he won something on this.
I guess he would have he won it all.
No, he won everything.
Go down the very end.
You won the showcase.
Yeah, you won the showcase.
I'll see.
The whole thing's an act.
So he's on the spinning the last wheel.
Spinning the last wheel.
One more spin.
There he goes. He spends it.
So the the other one has 85 cents.
So all he has to get is 15 and lower.
And he doesn't look he doesn't look anything like a girl here.
Hold on. He lost there.
That makes sense at all.
Yes, he lost.
OK, that was a lie.
No, he did win something.
He won a lot. So maybe he was on the show.
It does say Dylan Mulvaney wins on Price is Right.
Well, he won whatever he bet on there.
Yeah, there's another one where he went absolutely apeshit and it was like fucking.
I mean, when did when did Drew Carey turn into Santa Claus?
Well, he won his pool table.
Yeah, right there.
He's like, still is a winner.
Nice job.
What a fruitcake.
Yeah, it's not realistic.
Don't do this. Don't go away folks.
Oh, this is.
You can't take this seriously.
He's got his billiards.
He's running around the foosball table.
He's got the little pop a shot basketball game side by side and he's got the where's Waldo with the jeans.
He's doing the over the top.
Yeah, the rolled up jeans, the split Van Halen guitar jump.
I mean, come on.
OK, I like that move.
What the guy in the background waving?
Okay, turn it off.
You know what? Look at him. He's just frolicking.
It's a joke.
Whatever. I guess me bringing up the whole thing is that...
I just wish they could be authentic.
To me, none of it's authentic.
This only supports what I'm saying.
I mean, he's got some... There's stuff going on and I feel bad for him.
I feel bad for him. I feel bad that this experience is going on for him,
but he should have never been put in that position in the first place.
You know, it's not his fault.
The people, the government, these entities are taking advantage of people just to score points.
They don't give a fuck what the... I mean, they care now.
They're virtuous.
29.5 billion dollars later...
I'm sorry, that's not what I meant to say.
It was probably more than that. It was less than that, but 25 million?
Or 29.5%.
Yeah, their sales are down almost 30% and I don't know from a value of the company.
Well, they said between... I read in the article today,
the rate between Target and Bud Light, they've lost 30 billion dollars
between the two of them in market value.
Wow.
I think George Soros was like, you know what, don't worry, I'll cover it.
Probably.
He's got a lot of billions. I don't know if he has enough to dig them out.
Yeah, I don't know.
Hmm, I think so. Someone does.
I don't think it matters.
Elon does.
Well, you know, Elon's...
I kind of dig where... What's the latest thing about Elon?
He is...
I was talking about wonderful president.
Not really?
No, he wasn't talking about it.
People were asking, you know, are you going to run for president?
I forget what his response was.
Why Kandy?
He's from South Africa.
Well, so was Barack.
No, you have to be born here.
Well, he was saying Barack was born in Kenya, right?
Well, Arnold Schwarzenegger wasn't born here.
Yeah, well, he was the governor.
He can't run for president.
No, he can't.
He ran for governor.
He did run. He was the governor of California.
Correct.
I'm the governor.
I forgot what I was going to say.
Darn it. Damn it.
This could be so impactful, too.
Well, I'll just wrap it up.
Thanks for listening to us.
Yeah, we ran out of stuff to talk about.
That's a first.
Yeah.
Probably because you're a little toasty because you haven't been drinking as much lately.
Speaking of drinking,
the Texas congressman, not the Texas congressman,
the Texas speaker.
Speaker of the House.
Speaker of the House for the Texas Legislature.
Correct.
A video came out where he was all slobbery drunk.
Well, he was at the podium at the House,
and he was talking about passing an amendment or something.
And he was slurring.
It's a date of feeling.
What? Oh, hold on.
He was in the House?
Yes, and it's there in session.
This was six days ago.
Yes.
Okay.
I thought it was just a personal video that got leaked.
No.
Oh, no, no, no.
He was in there with the,
with the, what was it?
The hammer, the gavel.
He was being Speaker of the House.
Oh, God.
There's a half-sign.
Is he having a stroke or is he drunk?
Well, you should be able to find it.
Yeah, find that for us.
Texas, House Speaker.
Drunk.
Unbelievable.
Yeah, and he's slurring and, you know,
of course, his friends are trying to make excuses that he's...
Drunk.
Yeah, I mean, it's,
it's embarrassing for one thing.
And...
Oh, man.
Ken Paxton called him out saying there needs to be an investigation.
Yeah.
And then Ken Paxton gets impeached.
Maybe, maybe he took,
like a prescription pill.
Do a YouTube one.
Did they give an explanation for it?
No, I haven't seen anything.
Well,
a huge good being drunk.
Well, maybe he had a long...
All right, here we go.
Okay.
Mr. Campbell, the Senate amendment is acceptable to the author.
Is there objection to the opposite amendment?
The Chair has an amendment.
The amendment is adopted.
Oh my God.
The Chair recognizes Mr.
Mr. Johnson of Harris,
Mr. Johnson of Harris to speak in opposition to the bill.
Oh my God.
The Chair recognizes Mr. Niave Criado to speak in opposition to the bill.
There you go.
Anyway, Ken Paxton
called on the House to investigate
him.
And they impeached him.
And all of a sudden he's impeached now.
Yeah.
Well, I mean, that just doesn't all of a sudden happen.
Well, no, they've been building the case for him.
Okay.
Yeah.
So that was...
And they did impeach him.
Well, they, yeah, like yesterday.
Okay.
And then now it's going to the Texas Senate where they're going to go through a trial.
It's just like when they did Trump, right?
Okay.
So technically, yes, he's been impeached, but it doesn't mean anything.
It's up to the Senate to try him now.
And then they then they would kick him out of office.
Correct.
And what's he being accused of?
They're going to be able to do it because the Senate is a Democrat.
He fired.
Is that true?
Well, the Senate is Democrat owned.
I'm controlled.
They have a majority.
Not the Texas.
Hold on.
Does this go to the Senate of Texas?
No, no, no.
The Senate of Texas Senate.
This is the Texas legislature.
It has nothing to do with the federal government.
Yeah.
It's all inside the Texas.
Yep.
All Texas only.
And he fired some attorneys without cause apparently.
And they sued or something like that.
And he used Texas funds to pay them off like three million dollars.
Oh, boy.
And that's illegal apparently.
It's legal.
Illegal.
Oh, right.
So those are the charges.
Okay.
Well, there you go.
So they impeached him.
So that's that's it's usually Republican controlled House and Senate.
Yes, but there were enough in the in the in the house.
I was listening to the radio today.
Well, they're saying is impeach him over a series of bribery and corruption allegations.
Three million dollars that he used and it's that it was from the Texas budget.
Basically, no, wasn't he our tax assess assessor?
No, he's the attorney general.
No.
Who?
Why am I going to Elbon?
Oh, same not the same guy.
So he had given special treatment to a campaign donor who helped him.
Yeah, there's he's used money to pay off things and I'm not trying to defend him.
But if you dug deep enough on any of these guys, you would you would find the same shit.
There's so much corruption.
Well, what gets me is is there must be something there because even the hardcore conservatives
not the like this Doug Dade or whatever his name is Thielen.
The drunk guy.
He is he's he's a rhino.
Right.
He works with he passes a lot of the things that the Democrats want.
Right.
He works with them a lot more than he should.
But anyway, the hardcore what I heard is there are several hardcore conservatives who voted to impeach him as well.
Right.
Well, there must be something to it then.
Yeah.
The people that like get down to ethical.
Yeah, you know, ethical, you know, was it the right rationale?
There were some there were some true conservatives that said, yeah, all right.
Well, you know, so, you know, the sad thing is that most people don't pay attention to the politics that happen within their own state.
They only think about Congress, right?
Like like federal government.
How does this affect us?
He so he's the Attorney General of Texas.
He has sued Biden a few times.
So if he were booted, they would.
How does that work?
He just got elected again.
Right.
So what do you know what the procedure is to replace?
Well, we we would be a special election.
Did California or was it San Francisco just got rid of their district attorney?
So he's the attorney.
He's the state attorney for Texas, right?
Right.
So would the governor appoint someone probably until there was a special election?
Correct.
That's what I would guess.
Right.
Because that is an elective position.
Yes.
Right.
So, okay.
All right.
Well, that's interesting.
I mean, I don't I don't have any qualms about it.
If he's a sleazeball, he's a sleazeball.
Yeah, I mean, I don't know.
I don't know anything about him.
I think I think another wrinkle to this is his wife is a senator who's going to be part of the vote.
Oh, she has to be accused herself.
Does she not?
I don't know.
What are the rules?
I don't know.
How do you play that one?
I don't know.
I mean, should she probably but does she have to?
I don't know.
Yeah, I don't know.
Crazy.
Yeah.
So I don't really know enough about this.
I know what the allegations are and I don't know enough about Ken Paxton.
I don't really have an opinion on this one.
I need to research.
I'll tell you, there's I've got a story here.
I thought was funny.
I just texted our producer to see if he can't pull it up here, but there was a woman.
She she won an annual cheese rolling race while unconscious.
Did she fall down with it?
I guess so.
So on May 30th, the annual Cooper's Hill cheese rolling race in England.
I've seen this.
It's quite violent.
Yeah.
You ever seen the cheese rolling where they want they run down a hill to try to beat the cheese down there, right?
It's like a big hundred pound roll of cheese.
Big cheese wheel.
Yeah.
So anyways, the the the cheese rolling race in England featured the winner of one round getting knocked unconscious only and only learning of her victory when she woke up in a medical tent.
The annual event in Brockworth near Gloucester featured multiple rounds of racers stumbling down the steep Cooper's Hill to chase a simulated wheel.
It's just wheels off.
That does not sound like a good idea.
People just start flying.
Ow.
So there's people just running full speed down the hill.
And she knocked herself out.
Oh, that was the one that was running full speed.
Oh, and she won.
Question.
How are you?
I'm good.
Now that I remember it, I'm good.
You took hell of a tumble.
Did I?
Yeah.
Did I?
I remember running.
She has a mark on her left temple.
I woke up in the tent.
How does it feel to be the winner?
It feels so good.
It just kind of hit me.
So the question is, how did you get to the top of the hill?
The question is, are you going to come back next year and do it again to reclaim your title?
I think I will.
If I, yeah.
Until she gets home and realizes how injured she is.
Yeah, and she has like a serious concussion.
And her adrenaline's gone.
She smacked the ground so hard.
She bounced.
But I've seen this on some other programs.
I thought the cheese wheel was bigger.
But actually there's another one where I see them pushing the cheese wheel up a hill.
That's where the cheese was bigger.
That happens every year.
These people just diving.
They lose it.
They just flying down this hill.
So what there's some other goofy ones.
We got the running of the bulls, right?
People get hurt every year doing that.
I'll pass on that.
Yeah.
People get gored every year.
What there's some other stupid ones, aren't there?
What are some of the, I'm trying to remember.
Well, you had a world's most bizarre competitions.
Let's see here.
There's one that people always bloody.
There's a baby crying competition.
Oh God.
The World Worm Charming Championship.
Well, they have all sorts of eating ones, right?
They got the hot dog eating one.
They got the, they got the World Wife Carrying Championship.
World wife?
Do they have dwarf tossing?
Yeah, I think they did.
I think it's midget tossing.
No, they prefer little people.
Well, no, it's called midget tossing.
It is?
Yeah.
I mean, they don't have it anymore.
So, you know, there's no reason to change it.
So it was called midget tossing.
It was back in the 80s.
Everyone know that the black guy, the Mr. T.
I'm going to be a mystery.
I won't get you boys.
I'm going to get you sucker.
Remember, you know, they got the World Championship
with the Pumpkin, P-U-N, K-I, the pumpkin,
chunkin' smashin' pumpkins, like there's no tomorrow.
We used to watch that.
Me, Julie, and the boys.
It was a Discovery Channel.
And it was called Pumpkin Chunkin.
And we watched it for two years.
And these people would, there was different classes.
They would make huge catapults.
Oh, yeah.
So there's a catapult.
And it would be who could get it the farthest?
Pumpkin.
A pumpkin.
Yeah, it was like a, yeah.
OK.
And then there's another one with trebuchets,
which with the rope, we're going to fling it.
Hey, producer, you got to put Mr. T. on there.
And we watched it for two years.
And then after that, it was very repetitive.
So we stopped.
Right.
Midget.
It's like, all right, how long can you watch this, you know?
So they've got a cockroach racing.
Jeepers Creepers, it's called.
If you live in a particularly unkept house,
chances are when you flick off the lights in the night,
you'll get invaded by a colony of cockroaches.
What's Buzz Kashi?
A Boo Kaki?
No.
I don't believe I said that.
I saw it up there earlier.
Buzz Kashi.
Boo Kaki?
What was the one that you guys were showing me?
Jerry Springer.
And it had the guy from Game of Thrones.
And he was wearing like a wrestling suit.
Do you know what I'm talking about?
Who's the, is it Wrigler?
What's his name?
Buzz Kashi.
There it is.
I don't know what that is.
I just saw the word.
He's like the world's most famous little person.
The guy from Game of Thrones.
What's his name?
Tyrion Lannister.
Yes.
What's his name?
He's on Jerry Springer.
Are you sure?
Yes.
Because I didn't understand how, why little people put
themselves in situations where it's
like some sort of crazy mockery.
Peter Dinklage.
Yes.
Put in Peter Dinklage and Jerry Springer.
Are you sure it was Peter Dinklage?
Yes.
I am absolutely positive.
He's kind of an idiot.
Who, Peter?
Yeah, he said some really stupid things.
Is he liberal?
Yes.
Oh, yes.
Highly.
He's the dipshit.
Put in Jerry Springer.
That said that we shouldn't allow,
if I have a movie and it involves a bunch of short people
and I want to hire a bunch of midgets or little people,
what are they?
I remember.
He was like standing up saying, oh, but you shouldn't do that.
He was ruining it for any of the actors that could be on there.
Correct.
He's such a jack.
He's well-bearded, though.
Not coming up, huh?
He is well-bearded.
You know, I don't see it.
I pulled up Jerry Springer in the midget thing
and I got one video.
I don't really.
I don't think he was him.
I don't think it was either.
I'm looking at him and it's one that looks like him,
but it's not him.
I thought I saw it.
OK.
Put it on videos.
Click it on videos to see if he happens to be on that one.
Just put midget Jerry Springer.
All right, never mind.
I don't see what the big fucking deal is with the word midget.
It's so stupid.
Well, I mean, like any other word,
it's offensive to them, right?
It's not offensive to them.
Oh, really?
No, it's not.
She touched my peter.
Because you know so many little people that.
Have you ever met a little person that
said I'm offended by that?
I have never met any little people.
The only person that I have ever heard that's offended by that
are people speaking for them.
I've never heard a midget say, hey,
I don't like it when people say that.
How many little people have you met in your life?
I've probably three.
Really?
I've been exposed to a lot of people.
Where do you, where?
Where do you meet little people?
I have been exposed to a lot of people.
I have worked a lot of places that have a lot of people
come around, bars, hotels.
Interesting.
I've been around a lot of people.
I've met at least three.
Have you ever met a little person?
Probably more.
In the hotel industry.
Interesting.
Didn't really have a conversation, but.
You didn't say.
How do you feel about being called a midget?
Yeah.
I just tossed him.
They came by.
I said, hey, how you doing there little buddy?
Tossed his hair.
Hey, buddy.
Do they walk around with a harness?
Hard on.
Where just in case somebody wants to.
No, the one cool thing that, I don't know if it's cool or not,
but when I was in the Renaissance
and I was going up the elevator from the lobby
and a bunch of the four of the Backstreet Boys came in.
That's kind of cool.
And I didn't really know them.
I kind of like they look familiar.
And I think one of the ladies that was with me
once they stepped out, she's like, oh my god,
you know who that was.
Kind of a thing.
And you're like, no.
I was like, yeah.
Whatever.
Kill me, you whey.
They were short.
They seemed short anyway.
You know what?
It's always disappointing.
Yeah.
That's why I didn't recognize them.
Yeah, when you see people in real life,
although I haven't seen many people.
I mean, I guess I did see who's this swimmer?
The freaking amazing swimmer, Gaines.
Mike Phelps?
No, Phelps.
I saw him outside at the Star, one of those restaurants
outside the Star.
And I was, again, unimpressed.
I was like, I thought he was a bigger dude.
Was he juggy?
Is he like, how tall is he?
He was sitting on a bench.
So I couldn't really.
He was like six feet, isn't he?
Yeah.
Well, I thought he was taller.
Yeah, he's a tall guy.
Six feet?
I mean, that's not all.
His body proportions are a little awkward.
Well, that's why he was so good.
His arms are like.
Yes, yes.
But when you see him on TV, you're like.
Well, swimmers are not big.
They're not.
They're not, granted.
But when I saw him, I was like, hey.
And you know what?
Idiotic people say that kind of stuff.
You know what I mean?
They're like, hi, it's nice to meet you, Mr. Phelps.
And then they'll go, you look bigger on TV.
You know what I mean?
They'll say stupid comments like that that make them go,
well, thanks.
You know what I mean?
I mean, he's in good shape.
Oh, yeah.
No, he's in great shape.
I think he's over six feet tall.
That's one of the reasons why he was so good.
He was so tall and lanky.
No, I agree.
I agree.
His shoulders are.
I mean, that's the swimmer's physique.
So he apparently, some lagoon community opened up.
Lagoon.
Yeah, like they have a big beach.
It's like a retirement community or something.
And they have this gigantic lagoon type lake.
And he was there to do the groundbreaking.
The honorary dive into the lagoon.
Was it like a swampy thing?
Did they have alligators?
No, it was like a really ritzy neighborhood that
had just broken ground.
And he was their celebrity.
It's where they host the World Stone Skipping Championship.
Six foot four.
OK, well, he was kind of, I don't know, hunched over,
I guess.
I don't know.
But I haven't been fortunate enough
to see a lot of celebrities in my life.
Or smelled them.
I mean, I've seen some.
Smelled them.
Well, you said Selena smelled like a shit pile.
Well, yeah.
That was.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, what?
Well, it was Selena with Selena y Los Dinos
when I was in El Paso.
And I worked at that bar.
And she was performing out there.
And she smelled like a gym locker.
Is that the one that was killed by her manager?
Yes.
Oh.
We've had this.
We've talked about it a few times.
She's a sweet person.
I mean, I don't have anything negative to say.
It's just, who the fuck is?
Who doesn't smell after you're done working?
Oh, yeah.
She was up there dancing like, es de morir que tal es más.
What was she saying?
And you what?
You stuck your nose in her armpit?
Dude, no, you didn't have to.
Oh, she just had an aroma.
Oh, it was toxic.
She was like, do you want to taste my sweat?
She didn't say that at all.
Oh.
Do you want to smell my sweat?
No.
No, she sat next to me.
And I had my little tuxedo outfit on.
I was like, hey, you don't.
She was like, how are you doing?
And I said, hey, I can smell you from here.
You smell like ash.
She was looking at me.
She goes, she said, hey, Ruko, vamo' nos a mi canton, chico.
And I was like, OK, let's go, chico.
I wonder how much of what you say is true from your bar life.
All of it.
Well, I mean, I actually didn't say that.
But I mean, I know.
But it was still, whatever.
I mean, it was a very positive experience.
So she hadn't made it like when she was.
No, she was.
She would do the bar scene.
Oh, dude, seriously.
I mean, she was.
They all do.
They were doing the bar.
And look, this wasn't a huge bar either.
This was a Texas nightclub on Austin.
Do you remember what it was?
It was 800 North of Zaragoza in the lower valley.
In fact, Austin and I did a little deep dive
into the building where I worked.
It's no longer a bar.
I don't recall what it was.
But they still have the same dumpster in the front
where we would throw people in that were
walking with us.
Oh, great.
They take a bar fight.
Like dead people?
No, no.
They just cross dressing bar now.
I don't know what it is.
Back to its roots.
And they read books to children.
800.
Yeah.
In their drag.
In their drag outfit.
We're looking at Google Maps now.
Yeah.
They're right there.
Up one, up one, up one, right there, bam.
All right, so.
Oh.
Oh, that's real.
OK.
Anyway, so the point I bring that up is the, yeah,
I did meet a lot of people.
In fact, that bar right there taught me tons, man.
I learned how to bartend there.
It cultivated my disc jockey experience.
So look, I was like the one of the only got white guys there.
And I know you were Sean Cruz.
Well, they said Sean Cruz back because it was back
when cocktails was going on there.
But they had air personalities that would go there and DJ.
And there was one guy, there was two guys, they used to,
they taught me how to DJ and beat mixed music.
Yeah, very cool.
Using like the real turntables, the Technique 1200s.
And Selena came off the stage, dripping in her wonder.
It's where that Kirby vacuum cleaner's place is.
Wonder body fluids.
Was she like, you're Sean Cruz?
See if you could spin that using the control button.
What is happening?
Why do we care about this?
Well, I was trying to zoom in into the dumpster
where we throw them in there.
You're trying to see the dumpster?
Can you see the dumpster from satellite?
Well, you can.
I don't know what he's doing.
Was the dare queen there when you were there?
Did you live in a Lajala place?
Whatever.
So I learned a lot working at these bars
as far as bartending.
It's all inter-level.
I was like, I just graduated from high school.
Yeah, I just graduated from high school,
got one of my first jobs there.
There you go.
There's the dumpster.
That's funny.
I'm sure those aren't the same.
Well, I'm sure they swapped them out.
But that's how close it was.
If you swap that dumpster, you'll get Sean's DSA.
It's interesting, because they used to have the burrito lady
would be outside the bar every night.
And we'd buy a dozen burritos from her.
Because you were in that post-drinking starvation mode.
I wasn't really drinking.
It was more, in fact, I didn't drink hardly at all.
So you're saying it's a cookies-pet grooming place now?
I guess it is.
I don't know.
But it used to be Texas nightclub.
You got to say it like that.
You're right.
It's not big.
So it was basically down.
It was probably most that building.
So it was all those stores.
Oh, I see.
They made little stores out of the bigger strip mall.
It is a strip mall.
That's pretty like.
So it was pretty big.
They had a big dance floor, a big seating area.
Because they had a lot of live performances
there, because they had mariachis, los galleros
that would play there every single Sunday.
Oh, good Lord.
And oh, man, that was the craziest thing.
Because first of all, I never knew what mariachis were.
I was like, mariachis?
I was thinking about speed guns off the mouse.
That's the band.
The guitar.
Yes, exactly what it was.
They had guys out there.
Oh, I, I, me wevels don grande.
Of big eggs.
I made that part up.
But yeah.
Was that the three amigos?
Might as well have been.
It sounded like it.
No, they had mariachis.
They had some really great singers out there.
Lidiana Castro.
God bless.
I mean, I haven't said that name in a while.
But they had bands that, like, they had, like, La Mas,
which is a very popular Hispanic group, Joe Pasada.
La Mas?
They had Juan.
Isn't that like a pregnancy type of band?
No, that's La Mas.
This is La Mas, M-A-Z-Z.
And they had Joe Pasada.
They had Juan Gabriel.
Juan Gabriel is like.
Juan.
Juan Gabriel.
The head, I tell you what, one of the biggest ones we saw
out there was Selena Iloads.
So you guys have seen the movie, right?
Selena?
I don't think I ever watched it, no.
I watched it.
With Julio Lopez, J Lo?
It's J Lo.
Jennifer Lopez.
Jennifer Affleck, no.
No.
She never did.
Has she married him?
Did they get married?
Or a second time.
I don't know.
I don't keep up.
Didn't they marry and then divorce,
and then he married Jennifer Garner,
and then they divorced, and then he
married Jennifer Lopez again?
That's too bad. It's not going to last.
Who gives a shit? Yeah, they don't give a shit either.
Yeah, it's just like, what the fuck?
And, you know, I love Jennifer Garner.
I think she's beautiful.
She is such a class act in my issue, though.
I use a new TV show out that's on Apple that I forget things about.
Really? Yes. I loved Alias.
Yeah, that's how we've got it.
She was awesome on that show.
Yeah, she was good.
If that ever comes up on Netflix, I want to watch that.
That had Bradley Cooper in it as well.
Really? As a regular character?
He was. Yeah, he was either the roommate or her friend.
Interesting. Yeah, that's where I don't know if I got to start there,
but that's where the first time I saw him.
I always thought she was smoking hot.
All right. So look, I'm going to do I'm going to do a little twist here.
We're talking about movies and stuff.
I saw Netflix last night.
I saw a movie that came out called Blood and Gold.
Blood and Gold. Blood and Gold is new.
It's based on the in the spring of nineteen forty five,
where you have the Allied armies invade Nazi Germany in World War
Two, and there were there was some story that somehow this
the Nazis knew there was some gold in this one town.
And so you know how they were going throughout all the cities,
collecting all the expensive shit and stealing a bunch of shit.
Yeah. Procuring all this wealth.
Well, they ended up they ended up trying to find this gold
because they heard a story that there was a bunch of gold there.
And so they they go in there and start doing their shit.
You know, Quentin Tarrantino is right.
Oh, yeah. So it's it's I don't know if he
is like a glorious bastard.
It is similar to that.
An incredibly gory director.
It's not as gory as that, but they have some
incredible scenes in that in that movie.
And it's not as good as a glorious bastard.
I'm telling you, some of the scenes that there's one German,
the guy that was drinking the milk and the there was a glorious bastard.
Yeah. They were there.
That's a good movie house.
And he was like, just have his all the patients of the world.
The guy rolls a cigarette.
Oh, my God. That was I think he won an Oscar for he should have the bad guy.
Right. Yeah. Yeah.
He was fucking horrible.
I mean, what a good right down to the bottom.
Or he was like, you know, that lady's shoe on such a dick.
Oh, it was perfect.
But this will be the blood and gold. I highly recommend it.
I watched it last night and it was a little microcosm of that movie.
I mean, some of the fight scenes that they had was just unbelievable.
I mean, is there is there an actor that is popular?
I don't believe there's any actors in there that are popular.
So the I think the foreign film as well. Yeah, it is.
It's it's German. So they it's not even English.
So the director is by Peter Thornton worth letting go.
Yeah, that's it. And the guy up go up top a little bit.
So the guy on the right is one of the main bad guys.
What is going on with the video? I don't know.
It's losing sync.
It's fuzzing in and out.
Well, it could be the cables jacked up. I don't know.
But anyways, I might be loose.
So that girl on the left, she is one of the main characters.
And it's just the deaths that the killing in there is just
you got to watch it. Blood and Gold Netflix.
You're probably going to see this.
You probably will.
Well, I recommend it along the same veins.
I watched a see zoo.
You see that one.
How do you spell it?
S.I.S.U. It's a Finnish movie. OK.
And it takes place during the same time.
It has to do is at the very end of World War Two.
And as I as you as I as you.
Yes. And it has to do with this old Finnish soldier who
his family was killed and he was out of the army.
What's it on?
It's in the theaters right now.
Oh, yes. And he was this.
You can't kill the guy, right?
Because see zoo, they kind of if you look up the definition,
they say it doesn't translate into English.
It has to do with perseverance. Never given up.
OK. Described as a stoic determination, grit, bravery,
resilience and hardness. OK.
That's what this guy has.
And anyway, he's hunting for gold.
He's he's out of the army.
He's the war is essentially over that the Germans are starting to evacuate
and through Finland, and he's over there hunting for gold.
He finds a jackpot, just shit tons of gold.
So he's like meaning meaning like like stolen gold.
No, he was like artifacts.
OK, actual. Yeah, he was.
I go for it. OK, got you.
And he finds it.
And then he he's going back to his town, which is like six hundred
and fifty miles away.
And on the way, he runs into these Nazis, this little group of Nazis
that are leaving and they find out he has gold.
And of course, they want it.
And the rest of the movie is
them trying to kill him and him trying to get his gold back.
Oh, they take the gold away.
Yes, they get it.
And it's it's it's it's basically quite satisfying to see how these Nazis die.
Pretty gory, huh?
Yeah, it is.
And it's impossible because the guy gets shot several times.
He's in the water.
He gets anyway.
I recommend it's good.
Hardly any words in it.
He says like three words at the very end.
The only words are in by these Germans.
So it's really good.
I recommend it.
It's I mean, it's it's well done. Yeah.
I like movies like that.
He's about to kill this guy.
So there's someone swimming under the water and it's well lit.
So evidently, they've got some sort of light program down there.
They'll low it. Yeah.
Anyway, it was well done. It was good.
Don't know any of the actors, never seen any of them before.
I reckon a glorious carnage.
Yeah, those carnage are the best comments that can come up with.
During the last days of World War
to a solitary prospector crosses path with Nazis on a scorched earth
retreat in northern Finland when the soldiers decide to steal his gold.
They quickly discover that they just tangled with no ordinary miner. Yeah.
Yes. It was good.
It was entertaining. The mood fast, too.
Basically, once he finds his gold,
it takes about 15 minutes for that to happen.
And then it's on at that point.
So that's the movie. It's really good. I recommend it.
Well, I can get rid of that.
I can't say that I've seen any good movies lately.
Well, there's not really a whole lot out there right now.
And plus, I think the bar for me has that's gone up there.
In fact, even Netflix, I'm getting kind of bummed out.
I find myself playing more video games and watching TV. Yeah.
I'm I did start watching that Dungeons and Dragons movie.
Oh, I watched that. I bought it. It's funny. It's funny.
So I'm not so I have I'm only like maybe 20, 30 minutes into it.
But I've been laughing. I think Chris Pine's funny. Yeah.
Do you know who his dad is? No. Captain Kirk.
Captain Gatrere from chips.
I don't remember who that is.
He's the head chip guy, the head chip guy.
Yeah, Gatrere. He's always up at the beginning of the show at the at the podium.
I have to get rare.
I if I saw a picture of him, I would recognize.
Oh, you'd see him pull up chips, chips, chips, captain.
Captain Gatrere. There is a picture of him.
Yes. Yes. I completely recognize him. That's.
That's whose father?
That's Chris Pine's father, Chris Pine's father.
I think his name is Robert Pined, right? Yeah.
So is is this pine is pine the guy, the same guy that was on Star Trek?
Yes. Yeah. He's got a he's he's got he's got a good personality, man.
He does the what do they call the guy that plays the the guitar on?
Travels with a bar. Here you go.
Yeah, the loot is funny.
I watched it. I actually purchased it.
It was entertaining. Sixteen bucks on Amazon.
Now I have it.
I'm glad I purchased it because I tried watching it through the regular channels
in which I watch hijacked movies.
It's kind of a beat down sometimes.
I'll tell you, it's not Paramount Plus.
That's what we're watching it on right now.
Interesting. I was like, I thought it was just in the movie theaters.
I was like, why? How is it showing this now?
What is it a series? No, it's a movie.
I watched the movie. I thought maybe there was a series.
No, no, no, no. It's a movie.
If it did well, they'll probably make more.
I don't know how well it did. So.
Yeah.
I thought I heard it was good. I mean, it did well, I thought.
It's entertaining.
Yeah. So I'm not done with it yet.
So I don't know anything about how it ends.
Well, it's a charming thief and a band of unlikely adventurers
embark on an epic quest to retrieve a long lost relic.
But their charming adventure goes dangerously awry
when they run afoul of the wrong people.
So it's got an interesting collection of individuals on there.
So the spirit of the movie is kind of funny.
The spirit of the show is that Pine was trying to find this relic
to bring back his wife, his dad had died.
She was murdered by a tablet of of resurrection, isn't it?
It's something like that tablet of it was resurrection,
but something just like reincarnation.
I don't think that's what it was either.
But it's a retribution.
All right, just come up with some more archituthous supine, creamy.
Go ahead, get them all out.
But what's his name?
The British actor is really funny in this movie.
Hugh Grant.
Yes, he's great in this movie.
Very funny.
He turned out to be a douche in the movie.
He plays a good douche, though.
I'm watching that foo bar right now.
It's entertaining.
So that is.
I don't think I'm going to watch that.
That's odd, dude.
That's not Sylvester Stallone.
That's Orange.
Orange.
I don't think I'm going to watch foo bar.
It's good.
Why is it woke?
They know I'm just well, because Arnold's a jackass.
Since when?
You didn't like it?
I think if you should take a vaccine or you should be stuck in your house, not go anywhere.
That's a reason why.
Actually pretty good accent right there.
You didn't say that, though.
Yeah, you know, he was drinking the cool.
You guys are idiots.
He was drinking the Kool-Aid.
And why wouldn't you?
If you think the government knows everything and the CDC knows everything, why wouldn't
you like get on board and make other people?
I think the problem that I have with it is he was in his huge compound living up life.
I know.
Easy for him to say, you're the reason why the virus is so bad.
Yes, so bad.
You suck.
Get to the top.
Yeah, and he's hanging out with his fucking pet llama.
What the hell is that?
Is that a pet llama?
No, it's a pony.
It's a miniature pony.
It's an alpaca.
But you know what?
He wasn't the only one that was drinking the Kool-Aid and saying stupid shit.
Half the population was.
Right.
Half.
Literally half.
And you know, who the hell are we to throw stones at that?
I mean, you know, it's all the power of suggestion.
Blame it on the media.
Honestly, blame it on the people.
I haven't heard shit about COVID or the vaccine.
That's because it's no longer a problem.
Because it vanished.
Yeah, it did.
And Israel came out and said that the only youth, the only, there was not one COVID death
that they didn't have an underlying condition.
Correct.
No healthy youth.
Right.
Not one.
They said literally not one.
And there will be no repercussions at all.
None.
No one will, there's nothing that will ever come to light of it.
They'd be like, you know what?
These were hard times that were brought on because we didn't want Trump in office.
Do you think one's going to come around just in time for 2024?
That's what they're saying.
To make sure that they could do mail ins again?
And then have to, well, now Trump is trying to beat them at their own game.
He is, he is fundraising to do ballot harvesting.
Well, good for him.
Oh yeah, I agree.
I mean, if they're not going to change the rules, then we should do it just as well as
they do.
But have you ever seen the montage of them vilifying people that wouldn't take the vaccine?
I mean, it's just so vile.
It's so vile.
They're just like, you know, they're the reason that people are dying.
How dare you?
So if you're going to be a guest on The View, I would love for someone to bring that up.
Hey, Joy, you fucking cunt.
You know, you said all this shit about the vaccine and you were wrong.
You said all the shit about Russian.
It was CNN.
It was Trump.
You were wrong.
She never admitted it.
You were wrong about every single thing that you threw at him.
The only thing you have against Trump is the fact that he's a jackass.
That's it.
And he is a jackass.
But you know what?
He did a great job.
I can look past that.
Yeah, I can look past that he's a jackass.
I don't give a shit.
You know, I'm a jackass, but I do a good job.
Oh, I'm such a jackass, but I do a good job.
Joy, you're a stupid ass.
She does a good job at her job of stirring the pot.
And she's racist.
Oh, so racist.
She's good at what she does, but she's a fricking idiot.
They're all racist on that damn panel.
I mean, it's embarrassing.
She's there for a reason and she does it well.
Whoopi, take it up the ass.
Oh, actually, what's her name, Karen?
Who took it up the what?
I'm sorry, you said what?
You took it up her ass?
Whoa.
No, what's her name, Karen?
Who?
What's Whoopi's real name, Karen?
It is Karen, yes.
Wow, how ironic is that?
Yes.
If I went on the show and I said, hey, I'm a jackass, I'm a jackass, I'm a jackass,
I'm a jackass, I'm a jackass, I'm a jackass, I'm a jackass, I'm a jackass.
How ironic is that?
Yes.
If I went on the show, that's what I'd say.
Hey, so Karen, do you think you'd ever be invited on the show?
I think I have the potential.
Did you see that there was a Republican on the show?
Well, there's supposedly always a Republican on the show.
Right.
There was somebody, there was like a guest and they were saying something and the crowd
was booing and Whoopi got all, she opened up her can of Whoopi ass and told the crowd,
don't be booing, don't be booing, if you guys boo, they're never going to come on our show
and like lit into the crowd for, you know.
And I was like, how about not saying the stupid shit you've been saying for years and years
on the show.
How about not stacking your audience?
Right.
Yeah, I was like, I wasn't really buying it.
What a ridiculous show.
I mean, it is.
But it's so popular.
And all these moms are watching it.
Is it?
You know what, that's a great point.
You can't trust any of the numbers nowadays.
I don't know.
I don't know how popular it is.
Karen Elaine Johnson.
Yes.
Oh, look how it's spelled though.
C-A-R-Y-N.
That's really interesting.
I never knew that.
It's unfortunate that I liked her movies back in the day.
I liked her in Ghost.
She was great in Ghost.
Sister Act.
Yeah.
Before she became a vile political hack.
I thought she was funny in Ghost.
When she went to the bank, she's like, oh, I got gas.
That whole scene when she's trying to get a loan money and shit like that.
Yeah.
Yeah, because she was a con artist.
Yes.
But she actually could hear dead people.
Yeah.
But she didn't know that until she had an actual dead person talk to her.
Right.
She was like, oh, I'm going to do me more.
No, it was Patrick Swayze.
Oh, right.
Did you see the movie?
Yes, I did.
I did.
I didn't think she looked good in that movie.
Who, Whoopi?
No, the short hair.
Do me more.
What is wrong with you?
Yeah, I thought she was pretty.
I didn't like the short hair in that movie.
But remember, about last night, I was enamored.
Hold on.
I'm not done.
What?
She was hot in that movie.
I didn't like the short hair.
That's the whole pottery scene.
You didn't like that?
I didn't like the pottery scene.
Oh, yeah.
The pottery scene.
I just didn't like the short hair.
That's OK.
I'm not, I'm not liking it.
Dorothy Hamillish?
Yeah, a little bit.
You know what I like the best about short hair?
A set.
Oh, God.
Don't finish that set.
Yeah, I'm not going to.
Guys, because my wife will listen to it.
She'll be like, really?
You said that?
I guarantee your wife will never listen to this podcast.
Actually, she does.
At their office.
I thought she used to.
What?
They have, they listen to it in the office.
Oh, great.
Great.
So my wife knows what we say on this podcast.
Does your wife hang out in our podcast, in the office?
Does she have it going to her classroom?
Hey, guys, let's see what we listen to today.
Yeah.
What's a, oh, I'm not going to say it.
What's a panic?
I'm not going to say it.
I almost did.
They can learn new words.
Yeah.
There you go.
Oh, they probably know a lot more.
They know a lot more, less, or a lot more than we do.
Yeah, they do.
All right, so what was the other one?
The World Stone Skipping Championship is another odd contest that they have.
Have you seen some of these videos?
They're doing like the pig calls where they're going, hey, suey, suey.
Suey.
Yeah, it's just way over the top.
That's the Arkansas thing.
There is a toe wrestling championship.
Pig suey?
That's what they do at Arkansas.
Well, there's like these competitions on who does it the best, I guess.
Oh, I didn't know that.
I didn't know that.
There's a toe wrestling championship.
The sport is similar to arm wrestling except with toes.
In this sport, you go toe to toe and face off with some of the strongest feet.
The toe wrestling competition is full swing in northern England where an entire championship is dedicated to the unusual sport every summer.
That's about as stupid as the slap contest that they have.
Toe tangles try to take this strange sport to the Olympics.
However, it didn't quite go so well.
No, for one thing, no one has seen this outside of these people.
So there's also...
So Jim McKay does it on Wild War sports.
This is not a sport.
All right, so let me run down because I'm down to the final seven here.
So I got number seven is the air guitar competitions party like a star save money on strings.
Did you ever put your headphone in a crowded bus and start playing the air guitar?
They I thought that they had a they had a series on TV for air air guitar competition.
It was like, you know, it was like The Voice, but it was like air guitar competitions.
I remember that air guitar coming at number six.
We have extreme ironing, the satisfaction of wearing a well-pressed dress is priceless.
But sometimes one can't help but obsess over ironing clothes.
At least that's what we believe after learning about the extreme ironing sport.
No, it's extreme ironing is extreme sport, which you take your iron and ironing board to a remote,
dangerous location on the mountain side of the mountain side and iron your clothes.
Oh, my. That is stupid.
Why is that a sport?
There is a guy literally hanging on the side of a cliff with an ironing board.
Oh, now they just skydive.
Well, how does that shark laid flat?
They'd be flying. No, it's a guy with a shark down here.
OK, how's that a sport?
That is all you win.
It's it's not. It's just silly.
More than anything, it's shock value.
Oh, somebody's ironing under the underwater shark behind them.
All right. Number five, it's all shock value.
We have the World Beard and Mustache Championship.
The Beard and Mustache Association, the WBMA, has been conducting this championship since 2004,
which men flaunt their healthy and lengthy mustaches and beards.
The first such contest.
What the hell is that thing up there?
Wow. Wow. That is that looks like a horse.
That's a that's like a dog.
That is an incredible amount.
That's disgusting. Yeah, that's just odd.
So I want to know I want to know what these beards look like when they're not styled like that.
Well, there you go. Oh, there you go.
This guy has one side of his face down on the other side.
Not well, that's not a very well.
No, that's a crappy looking.
We love this guy here with the big old curves.
Yeah, that is a lot of beard wax.
That's impressive, man.
I wonder how long it takes to get it like that.
Just go out every day like that.
That's looking to be. Yeah, I'm not doing this guy.
It makes me want to shave a comb over.
But his beard is to come over.
Go up some where that guy right there.
So his beard comes down and up over his head.
So because he's bald.
So it looks like he has a cold.
Number four is the cow chip.
Cow chip tossing championship.
I've heard of this one.
Yeah. So the couch tossing champion is usually a game where you need to throw a piece of dried buffalo dung into the farthest distance person who
whose chip flings the furthest is the crown.
The winner is dry mud.
It's such a bad time.
You do that.
Whatever. That's just kind of it's a cow patty that you can help the dried cow.
OK, you're throwing shit across the field.
That's gross.
And you got the cheese rolling championship.
We talked about that.
That's the the wooden roll tunnel down a hill.
And number two, we got the World Pancake Racing Championship.
Pagan Racing Championship.
So who doesn't love their grandma's pancakes?
But did you know that you could race with a pancake?
Sounds unusual.
Right.
So the pancake racing is part of England's quirky tradition.
However, its genesis is still shrouded in mystery.
It seems to have multiple origins.
There you go.
So you're running with during the Second World War, the custom was revived by Vicar Olney, Reverend Cannon Ronald, whatever in a pancake race.
Contestants run holding a frying pan with a pancake in it as a run.
They tossed the pancake in there so that it flips and lands back on the pan on the other side.
The winner will form a team of two and four.
Each team will run along with a short course to stop to flip their pancake four times and pass it to the other person on the team.
The entire team, which crosses the finish line, are declared the winners.
What if you drop it?
It sounds like you're you got to eat your immediately.
You got a key straight.
All right.
Number one, the world.
What do you think the number one is?
How ridiculous is this?
More so than extreme ironing.
The world egg throwing championship.
How far or how far can you catch it?
Well, the event was born in 2006 at Swatton in England.
What the hell? Why is this all the shit happen in England?
Since then, the event has held annually.
The egg flinging games come in various categories, and one of the categories, a two of a team of two will throw and catch eggs from a greater distance.
That's something that happened all the time in fairs and and school events.
We did that and we called it Flag Day.
It was the game day.
Yeah, egg toss.
Yes.
It's also called the Russian egg roulette.
Flung the egg is flung at a human target.
Two players will compete against each other where they have to choose six eggs to smash them on each other's forehead.
Among the six eggs, one is raw.
And the person in the wall was smashing on their forehead.
That's fucking stupid.
Yeah, they we had egg toss all the time.
That's something new.
Yeah.
So the contest must not have much to do over there in England.
I think you're right.
Well, maybe they should have fun doing outside more.
Well, they don't have guns.
So yeah, right.
So what else are they going to do?
Yeah, we just shoot each other.
Speaking of guns.
Oh, my God.
This Memorial weekend was tragic.
Fifty people in Chicago.
Shit was a fifty five zero fifty.
Chicago.
That's not that's not unusual for a weekend in Chicago.
Right.
Well, it's kind of a record breaker for like in eight years from what I understood.
It was pretty high.
Well, the second half went pretty good.
We're pretty pretty fast.
Have you tasted your bourbon yet?
Yeah, I've tasted pretty good.
The Bartstown, right?
I found it.
Yeah, it's not bad.
It's not bad.
Definitely smell the sweetness now and actually taste a little tobacco in there.
That's good.
That's not as Bernie.
It was definitely not as Bernie second time around.
It was kind of Bernie when you drink it all at once.
As you say, yours was pretty full.
Well, thank you, Mr. Producer, Mr. Austin.
You got a little flamboyant bourbon flamboyant.
I was trying to breathe.
Apparently it did burn.
Well, it is.
It's May 30th.
It is May 30th.
What do we got going on next week?
We're all going to be here.
Do it again.
We should be.
Are we doing what?
We'll talk about it.
Now we're going to go.
We're going to come back for another podcast.
All right.
We're going to do what over the weekend.
It's still like us.
I'm Paul.
And I'm Jeff.
See you guys next week.
I'm Jeff.
Bye.