Welcome to our podcast, The Why in the 20s.
My name is Viv.
And I'm Nat.
We are two counselors in our mid-20s navigating our adulthood away from our home country,
exploring the why questions we encounter relating to relationships, identities, and uncertainties.
So whether you're listening to our podcast while going for your walk or doing the chores,
welcome on board and let the journey begin.
Alrighty!
Welcome back to another episode of The Why in your 20s!
Woohoo!
Yay!
I'm very excited of this episode because we are very interested in this topic and we
can foresee it will be a very interesting episode.
It's a very different pace of talking about death and all that.
This is a lighter conversation.
I think it's very interesting.
I'm very excited.
You can tell from the opening how enthusiastic we are.
We are so keen.
Woohoo!
Anyway, I hope all the audience are well.
Just checking in with you guys.
And welcome back to another episode.
Yeah!
We're very excited because what are we doing today?
Drum roll!
Personality test!
Woohoo!
I think it's just because we're very excited and the audience will be very confused why
we are so excited for this topic.
To be honest, I'm not excited about the personality test itself, but more about how we're doing it.
Yeah.
Today, as reference, we are doing the 16 personalities that you can find online.
Just put it up front that we both are no experts in personality psychology.
Our knowledge is very minimal.
It's just based on our understanding.
And if you want to know more, there's heaps of research on the website that you can go further deep down.
And another thing that I would like to point out is the 16 personalities is not the same as the MBTI.
The MBTI is more comprehensive, would you say so?
And of course, you have to pay for it because it's done a lot of research around that.
And the reliability and validity is higher than other free personality tests that are available online.
But that's also a strength of what the personality test that we're doing today because it's free that everyone can access to it.
So yeah, let's get started, shall we?
Yeah.
So just before we really get started.
So the idea today is we're doing a personality test for ourselves.
So determine our own personality as well as we're doing it for each other as well.
So I did the personality test based on how I think Nat will respond.
And then she did the same for me as well.
So kind of like a twist of the way we do personality tests.
And I'm very excited to see how different or how similar it is.
Yeah. Do you remember when's your first time doing this?
Honestly, I don't remember.
I think the 16 personality tests, I think it was 2019.
2019. That was my first year doing.
Is it at uni or like with friends?
Oh, no, I was just at home.
And I think at the time, a lot of discussion around MBTI personality tests.
And I was just very curious in what I would get and know more about myself as well.
So I just did it in my room.
Wow, I really don't know you that well.
I wouldn't thought you would take the initiative to do so.
I don't know if it's a compliment or insult, but no offense.
Oh, no, no, for sure not. I don't take any as offense.
Yeah.
But you say offensive, but.
For me, it's different. I did at school and at uni.
I mean, I did one in management class because I was doing psychology plus business at the same time.
I did one during my management class and I did one in my psychology class.
And the way that they presented is so different, but we can dive deep into it later.
But it's just interesting different faculty or like different school lecturer present the sexist personality differently.
Yeah.
And actually, we actually I don't know if you remember, but we actually told each other our personality.
We did. I don't remember.
I don't remember what you got, but I like.
But it was on the trip when we went to Newster.
Remember the moment we went in the accommodation?
We kind of asked each other because we didn't know each other well back then.
Apparently, maybe not until now, but.
Not after the test. The test that I just did.
I'm like, oh, I really don't know this.
Yeah. But then back then, we kind of asked each other what our personality is.
Well, you have good memories. I forgot.
But I don't remember what you said.
I honestly don't remember what you said.
I don't remember the conversation.
I think, yeah, it was interesting when I did the test.
I was like, oh, we actually kind of told each other about it.
It's just that we didn't care enough to remember it, honestly.
But yeah, how did you feel when you were doing the personality test for me?
I think the first thought I have is I don't really know Viv that well.
And I feel like she has different personalities to different people.
And I can't just judge based on how she treats me,
but how I see it through my interaction with her.
So, yeah, I'm just I'm just shocked that I actually don't know you that well.
I thought I know you quite well, but apparently not.
Yeah. And I think because I'm a more expressive person that I, of course,
and I ramble a lot that I obviously tell everything about myself,
most of the things about myself.
And I think you're more, I don't know, you don't really share much.
You're more a listener than a talker in a group setting, I would say.
Yeah. So I thought we were close, but apparently not.
I mean, honestly, knowing each other that well doesn't mean you're close or not.
Yeah. And I do agree that when I was in comparison, when I was doing the test for you,
I feel like, oh, you answer this, this, this.
I was pretty sure of most of the questions.
So it's a good contrast of you doing my test and I'm doing yours.
And I think some of the questions within the test is more personal
and like those inner thoughts that you would have.
It's not that observable as I thought it would be.
And I think that ties back to the 16 personality as well.
That is not just about the behaviour, but it's about how your brain works, your preference.
And there's a word for it, like the coping method, not the cognitive functions.
Yeah. Yes. But I think it's more than just the behaviour.
As the personality test is useful, the cognitive functions for us,
and it's more the internal, your preferences in processing information and interpreting.
So I would say it's a good lesson that I learned or things that I get out of the test when I'm doing it.
Yes, it's not because you behave that way.
So you are this personality. I think that's more than that.
For sure. And even if you have the same personality type, it doesn't mean you approach everything similarly.
Yes.
Because honestly, each aspect of it will go through each aspect later, but each aspect have their spectrum.
There's a percentage to it.
So I can't wait. I really can't wait to see what you got for me.
What about we start from you first since you're so excited about it?
Okay, yeah.
Should I tell you my results?
Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So I actually watched you do the test, but I don't know what she got, the results of it.
So I got ISFP-A.
Okay, I didn't get it right. Hey.
No, it's not right. But what are yours?
Okay. ISFP is adventure.
Yeah.
I would say it's actually pretty close. Mine's INFP, assertive.
So assertive mediator.
Can I see the percentage that you have?
So for me, the percentage, how about before we actually compare the two, were there any questions that stood out to you within the personality test?
The questions that, yeah, it's actually quite a field that stood out to me for say, you are not too interested in discussing various interpretations and analysis of creative works.
So what was the answer? What was the response that you thought?
Slightly agree. Because I've never seen you interested in any creative works.
It's not this. I feel like it's this. No, yeah, definitely. I, yeah, you're not too interested. Yeah, I completely agree.
Okay. I agree that I'm not interested. I'm not interested in any of them.
Yeah, that's what I thought too. You are the right, yes.
Yeah, so you're not the artistic side.
Yeah, no, definitely not. You know me well.
We'll see how it goes. You like books and movies that you make up with your own interpretation of the ending.
I say disagree for this. I completely agree with you. I really love open endings. Really?
I can interpret. I can make my own interpretation. They don't tell me what's going to happen.
Even if the show or movie is close ended, I will still make it open ended and think more about it and create my own ending.
Well, I don't know about that. Because my thought is, oh, Viv will be bored to think.
How lazy do you think I am?
Well, that's what you present to me normally. You're like, oh, I don't care.
Yeah, I think that's the thing. Like if I'm with other people, I wouldn't think much about it.
But if I'm watching a movie for myself, I would have more time to think about, oh, what does this mean?
How do I interpret this kind of thing? So if I'm with other people, definitely I don't really have that time to think.
Right. So like, I think that ties back to what we mentioned is not just a behavior, but like if you're with yourself, then can present it differently as well.
I think another question that I'm not sure is you think the world would be a better place if people relied more on rationality and less on their feelings.
It's a hard question. Yeah, I honestly don't know how would I answer as well. Yeah, I don't either. But I say agree.
I would say like not agree to the extreme, but like yes, slightly agree.
I would say so. I would say slightly agree relying on your rationality more than feelings. Yeah, slightly agree, I would say.
But at least at this moment, I would say slightly agree. Any other questions that stood out to you?
You rarely feel insecure.
What did you put? I would say agree.
It's a hard question. Yeah, I think overall, I agree. Like I don't I don't feel insecure.
Because I think that based on the religious belief that you have, I take into account of that.
That gives you I think that's how I feel because obviously I wouldn't think you would share your insecurity that often.
As I mentioned, you're more the listener than the conversational.
So yeah, but I think it's more the insecure. Yeah, I don't feel like I have a. You gotta say the truth though.
I feel like I don't have a lot of insecurities I keep going back to as I don't share about it.
I think there are just moments here and there where, oh, I suddenly have the thought of, oh, do the people actually like me?
And you will process it on your own. Yeah, exactly. And I would say I get not get over it, but I process it quite quickly.
Yeah. That's why I say overall, I would say I'm not that insecure. Yeah.
I think that's the questions I have that I'm not sure. But overall, you got most of them correct, honestly.
You know what? The moment I saw a venture, I already know I got it wrong. I honestly like adventure though.
I really like. Yeah, but that's not your main personality. I wouldn't say I would say mediated is more you.
The majority of your personality than that. Yeah, for sure. But let's dive into each one. Yeah.
Shall we? So the first is I was just introverted. I got 61 percent introverted. I got your 68.
I think it really does. The percentage really changed a lot for me.
Remember when I said the first time I did it in 2019, my introversion was very, very high. I think I got 99 percent.
That's quite extreme. Yeah, that was very extreme. I think at that time, I was just going through a bad phase of in life.
Yeah. And I when I answered it, it was more more introverted than now. Yeah.
And can I add on something? I think introverted here doesn't mean you are quiet, doesn't mean you're boring.
It's more how you see is do you value more the inner world or the outer world that you feel the real world is in the outer world or the real world is in the inner world.
So it's not just the stereotypical idea of introvert is quiet, boring, dislike people, stay away from that kind of introversion.
That's more aspect to it. But yeah, I think we both got it quite similar in that. Like I got 68 and you got 61.
Yeah, and introverted, extroverted, like they're honestly for all aspects, there's no it's a negative thing.
It's how you make meaning of it. Again, I think throughout a lot of episodes, we keep saying how we make meaning of it.
Yeah. And it's definitely there's not it's not a positive thing. It's how you view it. Yeah, exactly.
So what you say, the description of what the personality profile, we resonate with it that introverted individuals tend to prefer fewer yet deep and meaningful social interactions and often feel drawn to a calm environment.
Yeah, 100%. Honestly. Okay. At least for most, usually that's what I prefer. And the second one, it's the second aspect is intuitive or observant.
And I think this is the one that that's very different. I got 70% intuitive and 30% observance.
And what I did for Viv is 66% observant and 34% intuitive. That's I thought you're more observant based on.
So this aspect, it's more about going with your feelings, going with your heart or going more logical. Yeah.
And I definitely just go whatever comes out deal with it kind of thing. It's more not it's not about having that logical thinking through of it.
So you're more based on the feelings than logic. Yeah, it's the immediate response that I have.
I think because based on my observation that when you make decision, you think longer, it takes longer time.
So I thought you were based on more the logical side. But maybe internally when you're processing it is different.
I think it's another aspect. I think when I make decisions, when you when you say I take longer, it's not because I actually have a hard time in thinking which is right, which is wrong.
It's more about the two choices that I have to make between. It's not that much of a difference.
So I can't use my feeling side because it's the same to me. That's why I take a longer time to decide which which one to go for.
Interesting. Yeah. Well, I know you a bit more today.
But yes, I do take a long, long time to decide on things. Yeah. Which is something to work on.
I think that's good and bad in everything. Yeah. Yeah.
And the third aspect is thinking and feeling. I got feeling for 88 percent. Mine is feeling for 61 percent.
And I realize one thing is yours is more obvious than in the middle.
I don't know if that's because when I answer it, I tend to choose the neutral or like one score higher instead of the more extreme side of agree and disagree.
Because I'm not sure. But I guess so.
The percentage might contribute to that as well when compared to what I did for myself. Yeah.
So the percentage this might take into account on why the percentage is higher or more obvious on the one that you do it for yourself than the one that I do it for you.
Yeah. So what does feeling actually tell you? So the feeling is that according to the 16 personalities description, feeling individuals value emotional expression and sensitivity.
They place a lot of importance on empathy, social harmony and cooperation.
And I think that's definitely you mentioned previously that you are the peacemaker that you value that harmony and that explained on here as well.
Would you say so? Yeah, definitely. That's like one of the main values that I have for sure.
100 percent. What about the last one? The last one is judging and prospecting. I got 90 percent for prospecting.
Wow. I got 72 percent. OK. And I think this is the one that can be more obvious than the above. I don't know why.
You mean for yourself or for me? Both. OK. For my result previously that is more 50-50 for the above three.
But the last one is more obvious. Yeah. Do you want to share what prospecting means?
Yeah. Prospecting individuals are very good at improvising and adapting to opportunities.
They tend to be flexible, nonconformist who value novelty above stability. And yeah, I definitely agree.
I hold strongly to having to be flexible and adapt to different things that hits you. Yeah, I agree.
That's interesting. See how you would answer for me and how I would answer myself. Yeah. Yeah, it's interesting.
Mediator versus adventurer. Very interesting. Do you want to talk about the last one as well? The extra one?
Oh, yeah. So assertive and turbulent. 76 percent assertive. I got 64.
And I think to my knowledge, this percentage is based off how confident you are in your answers, more in the sense like how extreme.
I completely agree and completely disagree if you answer on those more and less on the middle average answers, then you would be more assertive.
Right. Yeah. I think that explains because I tend to lies on the average answer as well. Yeah. Cool.
Yeah. So that's INFP versus ISFP. That's for mine. And what about Nat?
Maybe you can go towards yours and see how I did for your personality. I think mine is pretty obvious.
Actually, I don't know. At first, I felt very, very confident. Yeah. But then now I said, oh, maybe it's not. I'm curious now.
But before we do that, some of the questions I have two questions that stood out to me that I have no idea.
I'm all ears. And it's the same as yours. One of them is you think the world would be a better place if people rely more on rationality and less on their feelings.
What do you think about that? I think I put slightly agree that it's important to have some sort of rationality around that.
And I think because I do to rely on my feelings sometimes, then that's why I see the importance of rationality as well.
So I think you're right. Did you put agree on that? I think I put slightly agree. Yeah. Yeah. Okay. So I do know you well.
Maybe. Let's see. And the second question is when someone thinks highly of you, you wonder how long it will take them to feel disappointed in you.
I disagree with this. You disagree? Yeah. If you asked me a few years ago, I would say agree. But I think now because I know my value, so I think differently. Yeah.
What do you put? I put slightly agree. So you think me worried that I would disappoint people. Yeah.
I think it's because you often share about your previous experiences. And I think I base off my answer of that. Yeah.
But honestly, this idea is just quite recent. I would say that's a change. But I wouldn't use the word disappointed.
I think it's more about how they perceive you. Yes. Yes. If they change the question a bit, then the answers will be different.
Yeah, I think definitely the wording is very important in different personality tests anyways. Okay. So I got INFJ.
Yeah. Oh, yes. But the last one is different. I assertive. INFJ A. Okay. I got INFJ T.
I think it's more T because as we previously mentioned, I wasn't sure about most answers. Yeah. Yeah. So the introversion, what percentage did you get?
Fifty five. Oh, well, you're not that introverted. Yeah, I used to be extroverted, by the way, when I did it five years ago.
I'm extroverted, but the percentage is 60 to 40. I remember. Okay. Yeah. Introversion and introversion.
But again, a lot has changed and maybe the way that I answer it or the way that I understand myself back then is not sufficient. So can contribute to that difference as well.
But yeah, I'm definitely introverted. Yeah. Prefer definitely deep and meaningful interactions. Yeah. I think that's very similar to like we're very similar in that aspect.
We prefer meaningful conversations. Maybe that's why every time we meet up, we just go deep and not have, I quote unquote, normal conversations.
I feel I already forgot how to have normal conversations with you. Yeah. Honestly, it's very hard.
I think when I hang out with Viv, we need to hang out with another person to make the conversation normal. Yeah. If we both meet up, just two of us, it's just like podcasts all the time.
Yeah. We're on podcast mode all the time. Yeah. But I really value that and I'm really grateful that I have a friend that I, we both, I would say we both interested in having those deep conversations.
I really appreciate that too. I have that opportunity to talk about these meaningful topics that we both agree, like agree that it's meaningful. Yeah.
And I think for most of the listeners as well, if you are here listening to us, I would assume that you are interested in those conversations as well.
I would assume that we are friends as well. So there's more friends in the world that are similar to us that we prefer the quote unquote, non-normal conversation. Yeah.
We're not saying we're not normal and you're not normal. We're normal and not always. And again, like how you determine what normal is. Yeah. And that's another deep meaningful conversation.
How does society think a normal conversation should be? Okay. That's the tangent, but let's go back to the second aspect.
The energy part. I'm 58% intuitive. Okay. I got 77%. I would say you're more confident than me in answering those questions.
I feel like when I was doing the test, I was like, okay, I know her well. I know you well.
I think, yeah, a lot of people have said they can read my emotions just based on my face. I'm very expressive in my own way.
So I wouldn't be surprised that you're confident and know me that well. Yeah.
But yes, I definitely very imaginative and open minded that I like to focus on hidden meanings and distant possibilities. Yeah.
Do we agree that's me as well? Yeah, definitely very curious, very open minded.
I think just from all the conversations that we've had, I can see that in you. Yeah.
That's why I got 77% like that's definitely you by being more intuitive than observant. Yeah, I agree.
So the third one is thinking and feeling. So that's the aspect where how to think and feel about the thinking and feeling creates.
I'm definitely more the feeling side. Yeah. I have 61% for that. I got 71% for you. Yeah.
I feel like I agree as well.
Now placing a lot of importance on empathy, social harmony and cooperation, similar to mine as well.
And I was just wondering, I think just a question that pop up is if you have to choose between the three, empathy, social harmony and cooperation, which one do you think is more important to you?
I know it goes hand in hand. Yeah. That's a good question. I think empathy. Yeah.
I think empathy is more important than harmony and cooperation.
Do you feel like there's a reason behind that? Is it because as a counselor, you feel that empathy is one of the most important factor?
Maybe. Yeah, maybe because I think I tend to lean towards understanding what other people feel as well.
They're more sensitive in that. But also the way that I treat people value empathy more as well. Yeah.
Because I ask the question is I feel like a few years back, I would say social harmony. Harmony is very important.
I think it would be the most important. But then now after doing counseling and everything, I feel there's so much more importance on empathy.
And honestly, how I achieve harmony is with empathy. I agree.
Would you say because of the experience that you had back in those years that makes it the social harmony more important at that moment?
I think it's more about the awareness because I think I've always placed harmony as a very important factor.
And even now I still do. It's just now I'm aware that I can achieve that through empathy.
And perhaps even back then, I achieved it through empathy or other ways.
But now I place more importance of having that empathy to achieve that. That's interesting.
I think it's just when also when I'm making decision as well that I tend to lean towards the feeling side. Yeah.
Anyway, the next one is judging and prospecting. And this is very different for me. It's the opposite, right?
I got prospecting. Yeah. Like for me personally. But oh, is it? Is it the one that we're different? Yeah.
So you're INFP. Yeah. And you're INFJ. So it's only one one thing that's different.
So judging individuals are more decisive, they're more thorough and highly organized.
And they value clarity, predictability and closure, preferring more structured and planning to spontaneity.
Yeah. And again, I think this is not I think a lot of people will have the assumption that judging is judgey, judgmental.
But it's completely it's different. And that's again, no good and bad.
And judging doesn't mean that I'm judgmental just to a lot of misunderstanding around this as well.
Because I have heard friends saying they just say, oh, I'm blah blah blah P instead of J because they would thought the word judging is a negative aspect on it.
Yeah, yeah. But it's absolutely not. So yeah, I definitely agree. You are very organized.
You like a lot of lists. You have a whole diary for organizing your days and everything.
I feel like you love lists. I do. I love the to do list and being able to take off those.
I would have just put showering as my to do list as well. I feel like to do list is just setting yourself up for failure.
That's just you. Yeah, that's just me. Yes, that is very true. Yeah.
And that's why I don't like to do lists. But that's that's what's different.
Like you like to do lists. You like more structure, more organized. Yeah.
And I think because I like to be in control that I don't like when plans change and go out of what I planned.
I think it's just very out of my control. And that's give me I want to say I'm anxious of when things go out of plan,
but I would prefer that I have a plan and go according to it. Yeah. Yeah.
I can definitely see you feeling if it goes not according to your plan, what would happen?
And I think I just see that through your various experiences and what you share with me and just how you react to it. Yeah.
That's why I'm more certain that you're more judging. Yeah. Then prospecting.
I think through the behavior, it gives gives out a lot of clues as well.
But even internally, how I make decisions, how I interpret things is definitely the same way as well.
Organize and I. Yeah. Yeah. For sure.
Now that we know our own personality type, would you say you resonate with it? I think so.
And as I said, it's the results that given from the website is just the average. It's just the average description for this personality types.
And it might varies even another INFJ can be different from mine as well.
But I would say the descriptions that they have in terms of the strength and weakness and relationship wise is I can resonate with it. Yeah.
What about you? Yeah, for sure. I really resonate with it.
But at the same time, every time I do the personality test, I want to get a different one.
Oh, what makes you think that? I think I just question if INFP is actually me.
Like maybe there's another personality that I resonate with as well. Yeah.
I do have that thought as well. So actually, when we are doing the 16 personalities, I've done the personality test as well to validate whether I'm actually an INFJ.
Well, I'm a proud INFJ and I'm not ashamed of it because it's my personality type.
But yes, I think after I've done those personalized tests, I got the same result as well.
So I'm pretty sure I am an INFJ. And it's interesting.
I know the career part can varies, but apparently they also say INFJ is more the psychologist, counselor career.
So actually, I know it's not how it works, but it validate and we are sure maybe I'm on the right career path.
I agree. At least I want to think that way to give myself some reassurance.
Yeah. So then now that we know our own personality type, since we're friends, maybe we can focus on the friendship part and see maybe some of our similarities or differences when it comes to friendships.
Yeah. So what does INFJ value in friendships? What does it say on the website?
So for INFJ in friendship wise, they not just searching for someone to spend time with.
They want to find a soulmate. Someone can resonate with their passions and their conflictions.
So I think again, really value that deep connection is what we want as well.
And we have a lot of expectations, not just from ourselves, but from the friendship as well.
That authenticity is very important. Yeah. Is there anything that stood out to you that you really resonated?
I think I can resonate with everything. I think it explains as usual, very explains really well on how I see friendship as well.
Like it doesn't matter whether I have a lot of friends. What makes it more important is having a few friends that have deeper bond and connections.
I think that's like very main similarities with my personality type as well.
That I really value that deep connection, this deep bonding with the true friends that I have.
And I think something that's a bit different is, and I resonate with it as well, is that for INFJ, they long to feel accepted and well-liked,
but they hate the idea of pretending to be someone else and not being authentic.
Personally, I do feel out of place when I'm with other people, no matter who it is, whether it's someone that I'm not close with, someone that I'm very close with, or even friends, like closer friends and family.
I still feel that way. Maybe that's why it says I'm vulnerable to loneliness, but I don't think I consider that as loneliness.
I think I just have to embrace the differences that I feel stronger.
Would you say sometimes you would try to blend in and I won't say change your personality, but match with the other persons as well, then the authenticity that I value?
I think how I feel is, how I feel it is, on a certain level, I think I do create a complete new personality for each person.
But at the same time, I don't think I'm pretending to be someone because I'm just channeling that similarities that we hold more.
I emphasize more on that.
And you know what's interesting? It reminds me of the previous episode we talked about friendship and you have the idea that everyone can be friends as long as they have the intention to.
And I disagree with that because I feel like only people that I share similar values with can be friends.
And I think this personality test can really show the differences that we have and why we believe in that.
Yeah, yeah, for sure, because even on the website, it says that mediators may actually find it infigurating to connect with someone who on surface has a little has little in common with them.
And I do agree that it's very sometimes it's harder to find the common areas that you share.
But at the same time, I honestly believe that everyone have that similarity, similarities.
It's just if you both have the intentions of finding that similarity, sometimes you have to work harder towards.
And I'm sure some people just don't think it's necessary to find to put in that much effort into finding that.
But I think throughout my life, as you practice it more, the capability of it increases.
And I don't have to put in that much effort to connect with other people to find that coming around.
It's interesting because I don't think that way.
I of course, I believe everyone can be friends.
But as to my personality type shows as well that I value still deep friendship and is either acquaintance or like close friendship.
And apparently on the website, they also said advocates have if they have to fake or tone themselves down to gain someone's approval, then that person probably isn't the best friend for them.
I think that's my mindset as well that maybe we just don't click that maybe you have your own preference or interesting things.
And because I value so deeply on those deep connection and conversation, and I can't push or pressure the others to like the same thing as me.
So I wouldn't put that much effort in it when compared to, for say, INFP.
It's just our interpretation though.
And it's definitely the personality does play a factor to it, but it's not the whole thing.
We're just sharing whether we resonate with what the test results mentioned.
And I think I agree with you.
I do not want to fake or tone myself down to gain someone's approval.
But I think it's just depending on how you perceive that interaction.
Am I doing something to gain someone's approval?
I don't think I am.
I think for you, you're more willing to put more effort in starting that friendship.
Oh, yeah, for sure.
Like maintaining it.
And I think it also depends on the other person as well.
If I can feel that the other person is not willing to, I don't think I will have that energy to put in the time, effort in to have that come to find that common ground with them.
Yes, of course, because it's two way.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah.
And yeah, exactly.
So we do have a lot of similarities and different views on friendship and just the connection we have with other people.
And because of the similarities, I guess that's how our friendship work.
And I think the personality test is very helpful because it can show how much similarities we have.
But we might also have some differences that if we are open in talking about the differences that we can better manage our friendship as well.
I wouldn't say that's the weakness of it, but it's something that we can be aware of the compatibility, as you mentioned, of INFP and INFJ.
Our conversation would just be based on INFP and INFJ.
Oh, yeah. Yeah.
And going forward, what do you think some of the things that we have to be more aware of that might cause a hindrance towards our friendship?
Do you think there is any?
I'm sure every friendship has.
Yes.
And it's just simply from we both working together on this podcast, just the decision making.
I think we both tend to avoid conflict given we value the harmony.
So I think being aware that we both tend to avoid conflict, I would say we need to be more aware on having that open conversation about how we think to prevent future conflict.
Would you say so?
Yeah, I think definitely we both tend to avoid conflicts just to brush it aside and not address it.
Yeah, I think just based on our both personalities having that open conversation and being aware the importance of it is more important than hiding it to yourself and let it build up.
Yeah, I think I learned that from a lot of previous friendship fallout as well.
So, yeah, I think it's not conflicts.
It's more about the different ways of how we do things.
For example, I'm really more flexible.
I like to play it by ear.
That's how my brain works.
If it's so structured, I can't follow it.
I think that's the main difference between us as well.
I'm definitely a professionalist.
I've done my schema as well.
And professionalism is one of mine, a very high scored one as well.
And I'm very structured as you know, the to-do list and plan it very well when compared to yours is quite different.
But I think it's just a balance of it.
I think for me, I think it's a growing opportunity.
It's a learning opportunity where I think it's more flexible on having that structure as well.
I don't think it would make sense to you.
Yeah, absolutely.
I think that's why the awareness is so important and not seen as the strength and weakness, but the balance, as you said.
And I've told you before we start this project, I have very high standards on myself and on others as well.
And I've done projects previously that the professionalism part plays a big conflict between me and my friend.
So I think just being upfront and aware of it, and that's why it's so nice that we have it's so accessible for this personality test.
Because not only you are aware of your strength and weakness, but having that conversation with your friend and how to make that friendship smoother is important.
Yeah, I think that's why we do encourage listeners to take the test.
Different personality tests.
It doesn't have to be this one or you can take all of them up to you if you have the time.
And just talk to, share it with your friends and just being more aware of the compatibility that you have with the other person.
And being more aware of, I guess, the obstacles to the friendship or romantic relationships.
Or even if it's for your personal growth, it could be more about, we kind of briefly mentioned about a career path.
And just how you cope with things in general in life.
And it is so fun, as you can tell, when we are sharing our different results as well.
But it will be very interesting to do this with your friend and even just digesting those questions and having a bit more understanding of each other would be beneficial for friendship as well.
Yeah, yeah. And yeah, definitely friendships, relationship with other people and relationship with yourself.
And just, I know some people tend to emphasize on either strengths or either weaknesses.
But I think it's again the balance of it.
For the strengths, keep improving that, keep it up.
And the weaknesses, it's more about how you work around it.
It doesn't mean that you're not good enough.
It's more about how you work around it with your weaknesses, acknowledging it.
And what can you do to, I guess, not allow the weaknesses to overcome your strengths?
Yeah. And just don't fixate it on the introversion and extroversion.
I think a lot of people are just fascinated by, oh, I'm extroverted, I'm introverted and ignore the other three aspects, which is very important as well.
We do encourage the listener to do more research on it and get a better understanding on different aspects.
Introversion or extroversion, intuitive or observant, thinking or feeling, judging or prospecting.
So yeah, so I think doing more research and understanding more in depth and don't get, not shy away, but like get scared away because how complex it is.
It really helps, not just yourself, but like relationship wise as well.
Yeah. And it's just a part of it. Your personality is not your entire thing.
And one personality test does not tell you your entire life.
But yeah, it was, I think this conversation was very interesting and seeing how the way you feel yourself and how other people perceive you as well.
And just knowing that, oh, there might be differences.
Maybe perhaps for me personally, I have to work towards expressing myself more so that other people will know me better.
And just knowing there is a discrepancy perhaps sometimes, but at the same time, there might not be.
So having that awareness, it's interesting to know that how other people feel you, honestly.
Yeah. Yeah. Thank you, Nat, for being so open.
So thank you. Thank you for doing my personality test as well.
Yeah. Thank you for doing mine as well. Letting me know that.
Yeah. Just knowing that I have to express more.
And listeners, thank you so much for sticking around and we will see you next Wednesday.
And if you want to check us out, our Instagram handle is the whyinyourtwenties.podcast.
And we release a new episode once every week on Wednesday, 4 a.m. AEST time.
And thank you for listening and we'll see you next week. Bye.