1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:07,200 Hello, I built this city on rock and roll, but stuff still happened. 2 00:00:07,200 --> 00:00:10,880 So what's up? Hey, Dell, you doing okay? You all right, dog? 3 00:00:10,880 --> 00:00:15,760 Yeah, that's right. I'm on a casual first name basis with computer manufacturer Dell. 4 00:00:15,760 --> 00:00:20,320 Dell recently made the very bold choice of asking all of their employees in the U.S. 5 00:00:20,320 --> 00:00:24,080 to come back into the office at least three days a week, if not full time, 6 00:00:24,080 --> 00:00:28,480 to which about 50% of their employees said no. 7 00:00:28,480 --> 00:00:31,680 Dell gave their employees an ultimatum saying if you don't come back into the office, 8 00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:35,920 you're not going to get any more promotions. Sure, you can stay remote, but 9 00:00:35,920 --> 00:00:41,040 you're not going to have any upwards momentum in this company. Take that, employee. 10 00:00:41,040 --> 00:00:46,000 Turns out they did take that. They did take that. About half of the employees who were hit with this 11 00:00:46,000 --> 00:00:51,120 were like, nah, I'll stay remote. I don't need your promotion. Fuck you. Now, there's all sorts 12 00:00:51,120 --> 00:00:55,120 of reasons why they might want to stay remote. It could be that it's just more comfortable, 13 00:00:55,120 --> 00:01:00,320 you know, not having to commute. That's a nice one. But there's also like business reasons why 14 00:01:00,320 --> 00:01:04,880 this is just dumb and way too heavy-handed. For example, one of the employees said that 15 00:01:04,880 --> 00:01:09,040 most of their team is just scattered around the world and there's basically nothing to do when 16 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:12,480 they're in the office. But this employee is clearly ignoring that they might be helping one 17 00:01:12,480 --> 00:01:17,600 of the executives finally reach climax by seeing all of their little worker bees in the office again. 18 00:01:17,600 --> 00:01:24,080 File for me. Yes, send that email. Spread those sheets, dear God. I don't have an 19 00:01:24,080 --> 00:01:29,600 OnlyFans, but I do have a merch store anyway. The point is, stop making people go back into the 20 00:01:29,600 --> 00:01:36,160 office. Dell and everyone. Speaking of things that we should be stopping, colonialization. 21 00:01:36,160 --> 00:01:46,480 This is my application to be the new head boy of France. My platform includes stopping colonization 22 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:52,160 of New Caledonia. New Caledonia, an island territory of France, which is a remnant from when 23 00:01:52,160 --> 00:01:57,920 France colonized it in the mid-1800s, is not particularly happy with France right now. 24 00:01:57,920 --> 00:02:02,000 Or rather, the indigenous people there are not happy with France. And as far as I'm concerned, 25 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,920 that's what matters. So there's a lot of headlines. As I was trying to put together this 26 00:02:05,920 --> 00:02:12,320 article, there's a lot of headlines talking about the violence unrest in New Caledonia and how 27 00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:20,640 some cops got hurt and people died. Not often do they mention the second half of that, which is 28 00:02:20,640 --> 00:02:26,320 because indigenous people are fighting for the rights of their homeland. Quick history, stick 29 00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:32,000 with me. France colonized the archipelago in the mid-1800s, and at first it was a penal colony, 30 00:02:32,000 --> 00:02:37,440 because every colonizer's got to find an island to send all the criminals to. That's just what's 31 00:02:37,440 --> 00:02:44,080 hot these days. But then they discovered, wouldn't you guess it, natural resources? Let's go, baby! 32 00:02:44,080 --> 00:02:51,680 They found a lot of nickel. Like the back, you know? So yeah, they found a lot of nickel and 33 00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:55,920 they're like, well, hold on now. I mean, we've been putting the criminals here, but we could instead 34 00:02:55,920 --> 00:03:01,760 extract the resources. And so it became a bit of a jewel. They were like, hey, oh, free money. 35 00:03:02,480 --> 00:03:07,280 What they were calling free money was the destruction of the natural environment and the 36 00:03:08,000 --> 00:03:13,280 subjugation of an entire people. That kind of free money. The favorite kind of free money. 37 00:03:13,280 --> 00:03:17,200 So they colonized the region, put the natives in reservation, exclude them from the economy, 38 00:03:17,200 --> 00:03:22,800 don't allow them to work in the nickel mining operation, and flash forward a few hundred years. 39 00:03:22,800 --> 00:03:28,080 And wow, why are they so mad? The latest uproar is being caused by an attempt to expand the voting 40 00:03:28,080 --> 00:03:33,280 rights for non-indigenous people, which has been up until now. There's been rules around that. 41 00:03:33,280 --> 00:03:36,720 And they're like, let's get rid of those. Let's let more white people vote, actually. 42 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:42,320 And so a lot of young indigenous, conic folk from that region are not happy and making it heard. 43 00:03:42,320 --> 00:03:46,720 Making it heard enough that Australia and New Zealand, among other countries, are trying to get 44 00:03:46,720 --> 00:03:52,000 their citizens out of there. Meanwhile, in France, like the elections have just kind of gone buck 45 00:03:52,000 --> 00:03:57,840 wild and Macron has already been like, I am gonna hit pause on that whole situation. Let's just, 46 00:03:58,400 --> 00:04:02,960 can we just, can we just not do this right now? Towards the indigenous people said, 47 00:04:02,960 --> 00:04:08,400 sorry, I can't hear you from all the way over here where your country is not. Here's an idea. 48 00:04:08,400 --> 00:04:19,200 Stop doing colonization. Stop that, he said, from America. Moving on, ask not for whom the TikToks, 49 00:04:20,080 --> 00:04:24,640 because it's the US government. TikTok and a bunch of TikTok creators have filed a lawsuit against 50 00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:30,080 the US government saying, stop it, knock it off. After the recent deeply unpopular legislation 51 00:04:30,080 --> 00:04:35,280 that's forcing TikTok to essentially be banned in the US, TikTok and a bunch of creators were like, 52 00:04:35,280 --> 00:04:42,400 hey, maybe you don't? And when I say, I said unpopular legislation, 31% of Americans want a 53 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:47,920 TikTok ban. 30% ish in America, that's like the floor of support. Like you'd be hard pressed to 54 00:04:47,920 --> 00:04:53,280 find an issue that you couldn't find at least 30% support for. You could have a candidate running on 55 00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:59,280 the slaughtering puppies platform. And you'd probably find 30% of Americans to support that. 56 00:04:59,280 --> 00:05:05,600 But anyway, TikTok basically came out swinging saying, hey, this is dumb. You're dumb. But 57 00:05:05,600 --> 00:05:10,160 beyond just saying you're dumb, they also brought receipts. They were like, hey, here are all the 58 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:16,080 things that we proposed, which were way above and beyond, including a kill switch that the US 59 00:05:16,080 --> 00:05:21,360 government could control to cut off access to TikTok at their whim. They're like, we did all 60 00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:27,840 of this. And yet you still crafted legislation that specifically singles out TikTok and bite dance. 61 00:05:27,840 --> 00:05:33,600 By name, instead of actually addressing national security threats, because, and I cannot emphasize 62 00:05:33,600 --> 00:05:38,880 this next part enough, China. So this has been filed. We're waiting for the US's response. They're 63 00:05:38,880 --> 00:05:46,560 probably going to say not as they do. I want a future. I kind of like doing this. I kind of 64 00:05:46,560 --> 00:05:53,120 like making kind of like making things for y'all. But the government disagrees to men yelling on a 65 00:05:53,120 --> 00:06:00,240 stage. It's going to be real dumb. Don't watch it. That's my song. I made it for you. Oh no. 66 00:06:00,240 --> 00:06:06,320 Did you like my song? That's gonna just play that on loop for an hour. Instead of watching the 67 00:06:06,320 --> 00:06:10,320 debate, which is going to be on the 27th, but it doesn't matter because you're not going to watch 68 00:06:10,320 --> 00:06:15,600 it. Yes, we are already at Biden and Trump's first debate. If it seems early, that's because it is. 69 00:06:16,240 --> 00:06:20,720 They're not even the actual nominees yet, but we're just doing this. Now I will concede that 70 00:06:20,720 --> 00:06:26,480 this debate will at least be interesting because they've agreed to the following rules, which are 71 00:06:26,480 --> 00:06:31,360 relatively out of the ordinary. Unfortunately, there will be no audience. Mike's will be cut off 72 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:37,280 at the end of their time. There's no prewritten notes allowed on stage and no interacting with 73 00:06:37,280 --> 00:06:43,520 staff during breaks. Yo, so like that's kind of neat. That's kind of how debates are supposed 74 00:06:43,520 --> 00:06:50,160 to be. But like it's a debate between Trump and Biden. We've literally had this already. 75 00:06:50,160 --> 00:06:56,480 What could they possibly say? What could they possibly say that is of any consequence whatsoever? 76 00:06:56,480 --> 00:07:00,400 If you want to watch it, go ahead. I'm not saying that it's a stupid thing to watch. 77 00:07:01,520 --> 00:07:07,280 It's just, I made a whole song for you. You don't need to watch it because I made the song. And I 78 00:07:07,280 --> 00:07:10,880 would highly recommend that if you do tune in to watch it and your blood starts to boil, 79 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:17,760 turn it off. Just file it under noise. You probably know who you're voting for already. 80 00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:24,080 The words they say on the stage are just going to rile up either side. Sorry. It's just the one 81 00:07:24,080 --> 00:07:29,280 side, but they're going to be riled. Gaming. Nintendo just dropped like 800 bangers at their 82 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:35,600 most recent Nintendo Direct, including finally making a Zelda game where you play a Zelda and you 83 00:07:36,160 --> 00:07:42,080 duplicate objects. Hell yeah. I'm going to duplicate all day. What's up? That sounds gross. 84 00:07:42,080 --> 00:07:49,680 Wizards of the Coast are releasing their overhaul D&D fifth edition D&D one next whatever evolve 85 00:07:49,680 --> 00:07:55,520 D&D prime. That's coming out in September, but you can pre-order now. Don't pre-order things. 86 00:07:55,520 --> 00:08:00,160 Don't do that. I feel like I'm saying don't do that to basically everything recently. And it's 87 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:05,600 because I'm right. How about hotel is releasing a classic relaunch sort of like World of Warcraft 88 00:08:05,600 --> 00:08:13,360 classic, but much more intense. The Elden Ring DLC, Shadow of the Erd Tree is out. Remember to drink 89 00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:20,160 water. It's important to hydrate and feed yourself. Take your medicine. Maybe go outside and look at 90 00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:24,800 a tree every once in a while. Not the Erd Tree. Different tree. Lightning wrap. YouTube is now 91 00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:30,720 experimenting with injecting ads directly into the actual video that they're otherwise serving to 92 00:08:30,720 --> 00:08:35,920 you. As in like making it so your computer or any ad blocking software or whatever cannot distinguish 93 00:08:35,920 --> 00:08:40,400 the difference between the video you're trying to watch and the ad. They're specifically trying 94 00:08:40,400 --> 00:08:48,160 to thwart sponsor block as well. Adobe is being sued by the US over how hard it is to cancel their 95 00:08:48,160 --> 00:08:52,880 subscriptions. If we can get that for gyms, I would I would appreciate that. I just recently 96 00:08:52,880 --> 00:08:57,760 canceled a gym membership. Fuck that shit. Remember those like weird mysterious monoliths that popped 97 00:08:57,760 --> 00:09:03,120 up around the world? A new one appeared recently in the Nevada desert. It's gone. McDonald's was 98 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:08,080 trying out an AI ordering system in their drive-thrus and they've already stopped because it was a 99 00:09:08,080 --> 00:09:12,880 disaster. It was just like creating bogus orders and there's a really great video of a woman trying 100 00:09:12,880 --> 00:09:18,880 to order food and it just kept adding sticks of butter under her order. Remember that stingray 101 00:09:18,880 --> 00:09:22,560 that was like mysteriously pregnant and no one knew how it got pregnant and they thought that it 102 00:09:22,560 --> 00:09:26,720 was maybe a shark that got the stingray pregnant and so the stingray would have like hybrid stingray 103 00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:33,200 shark babies. It turns out it was like a it was a disease like like a like a reproductive disease. 104 00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:40,240 I was hoping for shark gray Jesus but no. The great state of Louisiana passed a bill that 105 00:09:40,240 --> 00:09:45,760 requires teachers to display the 10 commandments in every public school classroom. This is a very 106 00:09:45,760 --> 00:09:54,560 normal thing. Very very cool. Very good. Not at all invasive. Conservative billionaire Timothy 107 00:09:54,560 --> 00:10:01,200 Mellon has donated 50 million dollars to the Trump campaign and 20 million dollars to the RFK 108 00:10:01,200 --> 00:10:06,480 campaign. This is your reminder that RFK is an anti-vaxxer who stands with Israel. He is a quack 109 00:10:06,480 --> 00:10:11,920 and a failure with brain-eating worms. Stop letting him swindle you. A cyber attack hit a software 110 00:10:11,920 --> 00:10:17,680 company that provides software to car dealerships taking out like 15,000 car dealerships across 111 00:10:17,680 --> 00:10:23,200 the country. Vroom. And finally according to Big Weather it's going to be a hell of a hurricane 112 00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:28,480 season. Like get ready y'all. Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of Stuff Keeps 113 00:10:28,480 --> 00:10:37,200 Happening. Head to SKH.News for sources, bonus content and a 50 million dollar donation to 114 00:10:37,200 --> 00:10:43,520 your presidential campaign. My name is Endeavorance. I will be off next week and back the week after. 115 00:10:43,520 --> 00:10:51,360 Take care and be well. Hello dear listener. It is Endeavorance again this time after the outro. 116 00:10:51,360 --> 00:10:56,160 Thank you so much for listening to Stuff Keeps Happening. It really means a lot to know that 117 00:10:56,160 --> 00:11:02,800 folks are out there enjoying what I am making. It would help me a ton if you would be so inclined 118 00:11:02,800 --> 00:11:07,920 to leave a review on whatever platform you are using to listen to this podcast. Maybe tell a 119 00:11:07,920 --> 00:11:15,280 person or two. Maybe even consider heading on over to patreon.com slash endeavorance where there are 120 00:11:15,280 --> 00:11:20,000 brand new support tiers that you can pick from to get access to a whole bunch of bonus content 121 00:11:20,000 --> 00:11:26,960 starting at $3 a month. Anything helps. Thank you so very much. I'll be back in a couple of weeks. 122 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:51,040 Take care and be well.