1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:03,520 Hello, I've busted out the sweatpants once again. 2 00:00:04,400 --> 00:00:06,720 But stuff still happens. 3 00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:07,600 So what's up? 4 00:00:07,600 --> 00:00:09,600 Oh, sorry, let me try that again, actually. 5 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:12,640 Oh, how did I do good overnight? 6 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:15,360 The president of Iran and a bunch of other high ranking officials 7 00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:17,920 of the country died in a helicopter crash. 8 00:00:18,520 --> 00:00:20,120 This happened like hours ago. 9 00:00:20,120 --> 00:00:24,080 I didn't I didn't write for this to be in this newsletter. 10 00:00:24,080 --> 00:00:25,400 But I feel like it's important. 11 00:00:25,400 --> 00:00:26,480 I should mention this up front. 12 00:00:26,480 --> 00:00:29,520 I I it's a bit sus. 13 00:00:29,520 --> 00:00:33,440 Weird, the leader of a country that was going against 14 00:00:33,440 --> 00:00:37,040 the American and Israeli interests suddenly dead helicopter crash. 15 00:00:37,840 --> 00:00:41,280 He's not my favorite guy, but like what? 16 00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:43,360 Like I checked my list of favorite guys 17 00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:46,480 and the president of Iran is not on the list, 18 00:00:46,480 --> 00:00:48,720 but also is dead from a helicopter crash 19 00:00:48,720 --> 00:00:51,280 right after pushing back against Western imperialism. 20 00:00:51,840 --> 00:00:55,200 So anyway, I originally planned to have a really great 21 00:00:56,080 --> 00:00:57,920 happy start to this episode. 22 00:00:57,920 --> 00:00:58,800 So let's go to that. 23 00:00:58,800 --> 00:01:01,040 Humans are very impressive. 24 00:01:01,680 --> 00:01:02,320 I promise. 25 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:04,640 I know we talk about a lot of bummers on this show. 26 00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:08,160 Let's instead not do that and talk about some really positive things. 27 00:01:08,160 --> 00:01:10,880 Here's three amazing accomplishments from humans. 28 00:01:10,880 --> 00:01:15,440 One, whoosh, two skydivers or wingsuit flyer people 29 00:01:15,440 --> 00:01:18,240 did some really awesome wingsuit flying in London. 30 00:01:18,240 --> 00:01:22,320 They like went off of a helicopter and flew through Tower Bridge 31 00:01:22,320 --> 00:01:24,400 and then like back up and then they were like, boom. 32 00:01:25,200 --> 00:01:26,000 That was cool. 33 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:29,680 At peak speed, they were going over 150 miles an hour, 34 00:01:29,680 --> 00:01:32,480 which is a bit faster than I am able to run. 35 00:01:32,480 --> 00:01:32,880 Check it. 36 00:01:34,240 --> 00:01:38,320 Number two, and this is actually two achievements in one, 37 00:01:38,320 --> 00:01:40,400 two Mount Everest achievements. 38 00:01:40,400 --> 00:01:44,080 Kamirida Sherpa, one of the best names I've heard in a long time, 39 00:01:44,080 --> 00:01:48,640 has summited the mountain 29 times, setting a new world record. 40 00:01:48,640 --> 00:01:51,200 That is 29 more summits than I have done. 41 00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:54,720 Meanwhile, Kenton Cool, we're just continuing the good names, 42 00:01:54,720 --> 00:01:57,120 has summited the mountain 18 times. 43 00:01:57,120 --> 00:01:58,720 He's a British climber. 44 00:01:58,720 --> 00:02:02,320 This is the world record for foreigners climbing the mountain. 45 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:03,200 I put a note in here. 46 00:02:03,200 --> 00:02:05,440 I'm just going to address a small group of people 47 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:09,040 who would have been me from a couple of years ago. 48 00:02:09,040 --> 00:02:09,840 Would have thought this. 49 00:02:09,840 --> 00:02:11,120 It's the only reason I address it. 50 00:02:11,120 --> 00:02:14,000 If you're going to hear a thing about Mount Everest 51 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,480 and people pulling off, like getting to the top of Mount Everest, 52 00:02:16,480 --> 00:02:18,560 and you're like, oh, well, like anybody can pay 53 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:20,400 and just get to the top of Everest these days. 54 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:21,520 It's like a tourist trap. 55 00:02:21,520 --> 00:02:23,520 Bruh, it's a big mountain. 56 00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:25,520 Like it's not a big one, though. 57 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:27,680 And people die on it. 58 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:30,000 And like so many people have died on it, 59 00:02:30,000 --> 00:02:31,840 that their corpses are waypoints. 60 00:02:31,840 --> 00:02:36,080 So like, I don't know, going up at 29 times or even 18 times 61 00:02:36,720 --> 00:02:38,320 seems like it's notable. 62 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:41,280 Anyway, third thing, holy god. 63 00:02:41,280 --> 00:02:45,120 Dorothy Jean Tillman II, we're capping off with the best of the names, 64 00:02:45,120 --> 00:02:51,280 has become the youngest person to achieve a doctorate in her field at age 17. 65 00:02:51,280 --> 00:02:54,640 She studied some kind of health field that I don't understand. 66 00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:58,480 Probably because I'm not a 17-year-old doctorate holder. 67 00:02:58,480 --> 00:03:02,240 She got her associates in 2016, her bachelors in 2018, 68 00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:04,240 and her masters in 2020. 69 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:08,800 In 2021, she started her doctorate program at age 15. 70 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:13,120 I was lying to Newgrounds about my age when I was 15. 71 00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:15,680 So yeah, humans, pretty impressive. 72 00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:16,880 Except for Greg Abbott. 73 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:18,880 Greg Abbott is a piece of shit. 74 00:03:18,880 --> 00:03:20,560 Texas Governor Greg Abbott. 75 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:25,280 An elected official who is arguably the leader of a state with people living there. 76 00:03:25,280 --> 00:03:30,560 Has pardoned a murderer, like just kind of gave a whole ass pardon to a whole ass murderer. 77 00:03:30,560 --> 00:03:34,720 In 2020, Daniel Perry, a murderer, murdered Garrett Foster, 78 00:03:34,720 --> 00:03:36,880 who was at a Black Lives Matter rally. 79 00:03:36,880 --> 00:03:40,000 Both of these men were former U.S. military service members. 80 00:03:40,000 --> 00:03:45,040 One of them posted online about how he might have to go kill some people on his drive to work, 81 00:03:45,040 --> 00:03:47,360 because there was a Black Lives Matter protest going on, 82 00:03:47,360 --> 00:03:50,400 and he referred to the people who were protesting for civil rights 83 00:03:50,400 --> 00:03:53,600 as monkeys, flinging their shit. 84 00:03:53,600 --> 00:03:58,480 Perry then drove his car through a crowd of protesters, shot and killed Garrett Foster, 85 00:03:58,480 --> 00:04:00,720 and drove off like the coward that he is. 86 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:04,400 He posted online about wanting to kill people, and then he killed people. 87 00:04:04,400 --> 00:04:07,520 And then he was convicted of murder because of the killing that he did. 88 00:04:07,520 --> 00:04:11,600 But of course, right-wing pundits have been calling for this man to be pardoned for years. 89 00:04:11,600 --> 00:04:14,080 So that's the thing that the governor does. 90 00:04:14,960 --> 00:04:16,560 Because it doesn't matter. 91 00:04:16,560 --> 00:04:18,160 It's just about political points. 92 00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:20,560 The argument that they're using is self-defense, 93 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,960 that Daniel Perry was simply acting in self-defense, 94 00:04:22,960 --> 00:04:27,040 and Texas' Stand Your Ground laws are the reason that he's being pardoned. 95 00:04:27,920 --> 00:04:30,640 He drove his car into a crowd of protesters. 96 00:04:30,640 --> 00:04:32,640 They're trying to take the same defense as Rittenhouse, 97 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:37,840 where it's like, oh, but he killed a person who was protesting the wrong stuff. 98 00:04:38,480 --> 00:04:40,000 So it's okay that he did the kill. 99 00:04:40,000 --> 00:04:44,160 I can crack jokes and I can smile in the face of the absolute absurdity of the world that we live in. 100 00:04:44,160 --> 00:04:45,680 That's what I do. 101 00:04:45,680 --> 00:04:47,360 That is my job right now. 102 00:04:47,360 --> 00:04:51,440 It doesn't change the fact that this is just pure evil. 103 00:04:51,440 --> 00:04:55,040 Instead of policy, instead of trying to improve the lives of anyone, 104 00:04:55,040 --> 00:05:01,360 it's just a matter of tapping into what's going to rile people up the most and doing that. 105 00:05:01,360 --> 00:05:02,960 It doesn't matter the morality. 106 00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:04,560 It doesn't matter the legality. 107 00:05:04,560 --> 00:05:06,240 It doesn't matter the hypocrisy. 108 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:07,440 And they know it. 109 00:05:07,440 --> 00:05:09,840 You finding this out doesn't change anything. 110 00:05:09,840 --> 00:05:10,960 That they don't care. 111 00:05:10,960 --> 00:05:12,320 It is not lost on them. 112 00:05:12,320 --> 00:05:13,760 That this is understood. 113 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:16,080 But they don't consider you a threat. 114 00:05:16,080 --> 00:05:18,560 And they don't consider you a factor in their decision making. 115 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:21,920 Otherwise, they probably wouldn't be pardoning murderers 116 00:05:21,920 --> 00:05:25,200 or just doing all of the other overt crimes that they do. 117 00:05:26,080 --> 00:05:26,800 You know? 118 00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:30,080 So ultimately, my heart goes out to the family of Garrett Foster. 119 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:32,880 The death of their loved one is being made a mockery of. 120 00:05:32,880 --> 00:05:33,680 All right. 121 00:05:33,680 --> 00:05:34,240 All right. 122 00:05:34,240 --> 00:05:34,720 Back up. 123 00:05:34,720 --> 00:05:36,640 We're going back up with the vibes. 124 00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:38,720 Turns out the internet is kind of okay. 125 00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:43,600 According to an Oxford study of over 2 million people across 168 countries, 126 00:05:43,600 --> 00:05:47,200 the internet is pretty good. 127 00:05:47,200 --> 00:05:49,440 The Oxford study looked into the well-being of people 128 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:50,800 who were connected to the internet. 129 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:53,520 And across virtually every version of well-being 130 00:05:53,520 --> 00:05:57,280 that they interpreted went up with having internet connections. 131 00:05:57,280 --> 00:05:58,400 This makes sense, right? 132 00:05:58,400 --> 00:06:00,640 Like there's a lot of oof about social media 133 00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:03,920 rotting our brains and being terrible for like self-image 134 00:06:03,920 --> 00:06:08,560 and anxiety and stress and everything that I feel. 135 00:06:08,560 --> 00:06:10,480 But it also connects you to your loved ones 136 00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:12,320 and answers questions about illnesses 137 00:06:12,320 --> 00:06:15,680 and gives you advice and gives you a glimpse 138 00:06:15,680 --> 00:06:17,760 into the outside world and lets you experience things 139 00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:20,960 you never would have thought and many, many, many more things. 140 00:06:20,960 --> 00:06:22,240 If we didn't have the internet, 141 00:06:22,240 --> 00:06:24,720 you could be trapped in a situation where you're like walking around 142 00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:27,040 wondering how tall Barack Obama is 143 00:06:27,040 --> 00:06:29,280 and you wouldn't be able to get that information readily. 144 00:06:30,160 --> 00:06:31,760 I don't want that kind of existence. 145 00:06:31,760 --> 00:06:33,760 But regardless, as somebody who works in technology 146 00:06:33,760 --> 00:06:38,240 and also finds the internet to be generally oof, maybe it's ight. 147 00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:39,280 Classic boomer. 148 00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:40,960 Wife bad. 149 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:46,400 Supreme Court Justice Samuel Alito has pulled the Blame My Wife card 150 00:06:46,400 --> 00:06:49,840 after it came out that he was flying a upside down American flag 151 00:06:49,840 --> 00:06:53,920 over his house during the whole 2020 election denial kerfuffle. 152 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:57,680 Weird mindless husks of carbon who thought that Trump won the 2020 election 153 00:06:57,680 --> 00:06:59,440 and should be reinstalled as president 154 00:06:59,440 --> 00:07:02,240 were flying upside down American flags out front of their house 155 00:07:02,240 --> 00:07:03,840 as like a sign of solidarity. 156 00:07:03,840 --> 00:07:07,760 One of those houses include Supreme Court Justice Alito. 157 00:07:08,320 --> 00:07:09,920 A Supreme Court Justice. 158 00:07:09,920 --> 00:07:14,080 So obviously it's like, hey, maybe somebody sitting on our weird 159 00:07:14,080 --> 00:07:19,360 high council position shouldn't be that closely aligned with a president 160 00:07:19,360 --> 00:07:24,320 who did crimes and those crimes that are now being looked into by the Supreme Court. 161 00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:26,240 Which he sits on. 162 00:07:26,240 --> 00:07:26,880 His response? 163 00:07:27,680 --> 00:07:28,560 My wife did it. 164 00:07:29,280 --> 00:07:30,240 Blame her. 165 00:07:30,240 --> 00:07:34,560 My wife did it specifically because she was upset by our neighbor's yard signs 166 00:07:34,560 --> 00:07:36,080 and was in distress. 167 00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,880 Apparently the neighbor at some point called her a cunt. 168 00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:43,920 And so she was like, devolve, damn, time to fly an upside down American flag. 169 00:07:43,920 --> 00:07:44,960 Distress. 170 00:07:44,960 --> 00:07:48,800 And so like in one reality, he's, you know, 171 00:07:49,440 --> 00:07:52,800 aligned with the criminal ex-presidents blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, 172 00:07:52,800 --> 00:07:54,400 high council, all that crap. 173 00:07:54,400 --> 00:07:58,880 In the other reality, his wife got called a cunt and was so upset by that 174 00:07:58,880 --> 00:08:02,320 that she flew an upside down American flag out front of one of the country's 175 00:08:02,320 --> 00:08:04,320 highest ranking officials house. 176 00:08:04,320 --> 00:08:04,720 What? 177 00:08:06,000 --> 00:08:06,720 Bro. 178 00:08:06,720 --> 00:08:08,560 So either she did it or she didn't. 179 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:12,880 And either he blamed his wife or something to try to get out of being blamed. 180 00:08:13,600 --> 00:08:16,880 Holy God, this man sits on a high council. 181 00:08:16,880 --> 00:08:18,480 That's what the Supreme Court is. 182 00:08:18,480 --> 00:08:21,600 It's a high council and they decide our fate. 183 00:08:21,600 --> 00:08:23,440 And he's like, blame my wife. 184 00:08:24,240 --> 00:08:25,280 Wife bad. 185 00:08:25,280 --> 00:08:26,240 Dear Lord. 186 00:08:26,240 --> 00:08:26,720 Gaming. 187 00:08:26,720 --> 00:08:30,640 Because speed runners and game analyzers are incredible people, 188 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:36,640 the unopenable door in Super Mario 64, the frozen, the chill mountain level, has been open. 189 00:08:36,640 --> 00:08:39,280 The video itself has big half a press energy. 190 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:43,440 New GTA potential launch date is fall 2025. 191 00:08:43,440 --> 00:08:47,360 They made a fallout show that did pretty good and now they're putting that in everything. 192 00:08:47,360 --> 00:08:49,440 So fallout is coming to fortnight. 193 00:08:49,440 --> 00:08:54,400 There's no other way to shoot guns in the fallout universe than fortnight. 194 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:59,280 Turnbrace strategy game endless legend is free right now on steam for the next like 195 00:08:59,280 --> 00:09:02,240 three days from time of posting until May 23rd. 196 00:09:02,240 --> 00:09:02,960 So go get it. 197 00:09:02,960 --> 00:09:04,560 Like it's literally just go get it. 198 00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:05,360 It's a good game. 199 00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:08,640 We've got a new look at what might be Valve's next game called deadlock. 200 00:09:08,640 --> 00:09:11,040 It's being like beta tested or something right now. 201 00:09:11,040 --> 00:09:13,840 It looks like it's in the valorant overwatching space, 202 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:17,520 but possibly with like more MOBA elements or something we shall see. 203 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:23,280 If you forgot, Valve makes video games sometimes lightning round after having signed a bill in 204 00:09:23,280 --> 00:09:27,120 2022 that allowed people to challenge and remove books from schools. 205 00:09:27,120 --> 00:09:32,320 Run to Sanctus is signing a new bill that restricts that because obviously people have 206 00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:33,120 been misusing it. 207 00:09:33,120 --> 00:09:38,560 Granted, he's blaming a lib who wanted to remove the Bible from schools as the reason. 208 00:09:38,560 --> 00:09:42,880 So yeah, not all the people trying to ban every other book according to science people. 209 00:09:43,440 --> 00:09:47,200 We can expect more solar storms in the coming months, possibly years. 210 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:48,880 We're just getting started, baby. 211 00:09:48,880 --> 00:09:52,640 The King Charles official portrait came out and it instantly became a meme. 212 00:09:53,280 --> 00:09:54,800 Honestly, it's wonderful. 213 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:55,840 I'm gonna be real though. 214 00:09:55,840 --> 00:09:56,880 Like it's a good pay. 215 00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:58,080 I don't know. 216 00:09:58,080 --> 00:09:58,960 It's hysterical. 217 00:09:59,920 --> 00:10:01,840 But artistically, I like it. 218 00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:06,880 Google is pushing their AI generated search results to everyone, despite nobody asking. 219 00:10:06,880 --> 00:10:12,320 Democrat mayor of New York City and former cop Eric Adams has implied that immigrants should 220 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:15,280 be lifeguards because they're quote, good swimmers. 221 00:10:15,280 --> 00:10:16,960 Sorry, excellent swimmers. 222 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:18,080 Gotta get that quote right. 223 00:10:18,080 --> 00:10:21,600 According to his grandson, Jimmy Carter is nearing the end of his life. 224 00:10:21,600 --> 00:10:23,520 He's been in hospice care for over a year. 225 00:10:23,520 --> 00:10:27,040 I, wow, I talked about that on an episode of Stuff Keeps Happening. 226 00:10:27,040 --> 00:10:27,840 That was over a year? 227 00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:30,720 Time is an illusion. 228 00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:31,520 More Google stuff. 229 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:34,400 Google is pushing an AI video generator thing. 230 00:10:35,040 --> 00:10:38,800 And it's being promoted by Donald Glover, which is a bummer. 231 00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:40,160 More and more Google stuff. 232 00:10:40,160 --> 00:10:44,880 They locked out a writer's ability to share her book that she was writing in Google Docs 233 00:10:44,880 --> 00:10:47,200 because they deemed the content inappropriate. 234 00:10:47,200 --> 00:10:48,240 This is a reminder. 235 00:10:48,240 --> 00:10:53,040 If you're writing anything in Google Docs, they see it and they analyze it. 236 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:54,160 Shout out to Obsidian. 237 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:55,280 What up? 238 00:10:55,280 --> 00:10:59,120 The Supreme Court passed a ruling that the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau 239 00:10:59,120 --> 00:11:00,160 can stick around. 240 00:11:00,160 --> 00:11:04,480 Conservative groups are pushing to get rid of the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, 241 00:11:04,480 --> 00:11:05,360 but it's going to stay. 242 00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:09,840 So hey, maybe consumers should have any, any protections at all. 243 00:11:09,840 --> 00:11:12,720 And finally for today, this makes my heart sing. 244 00:11:13,280 --> 00:11:18,400 An Australian mining billionaire is pretty upset because an Indigenous artist 245 00:11:19,120 --> 00:11:21,120 painted a pretty good likeness of her. 246 00:11:21,120 --> 00:11:25,120 Really captured her essence of what kind of a piece of shit this woman is. 247 00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:29,360 And it was in a museum and she's trying to get rid of it. 248 00:11:29,360 --> 00:11:32,080 A whole-ass Streisand effect situation. 249 00:11:32,080 --> 00:11:35,680 If you were listening to this episode, you can, you can find the image. 250 00:11:35,680 --> 00:11:37,200 I'll put it, I'll put it in the newsletter. 251 00:11:37,200 --> 00:11:38,800 You can tap through if you want to appreciate it. 252 00:11:38,800 --> 00:11:41,600 Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of Stuff Keeps Happening. 253 00:11:41,600 --> 00:11:48,320 Head to skh.news for sources, bonus content, and that very, very good likeness. 254 00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:49,360 My name is Endeavorance. 255 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:50,720 I'll be back on Monday. 256 00:11:50,720 --> 00:12:00,720 Take care and be well.