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Hello, I turned off my faucet while brushing my teeth.

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But stuff still happened.

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So what's up?

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TikTok is your new destination for long form video.

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Aren't you excited for that?

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While YouTube and Instagram have been doing everything they can to try to recapture

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the lightning in a bottle that TikTok got, TikTok is now doing the same thing to YouTube.

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But the wrong way.

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TikTok has announced that they are going to be actively pushing long form videos

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that are in the horizontal format on for you pages.

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That thing that everyone didn't ask for.

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Like, we all understand that turning your phone sideways,

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that's too much effort for your average for you page experience.

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I'm not going to do that.

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I will say this is not like the stupidest idea ever.

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Right? Like, it would be kind of nice to have a long form video option on TikTok

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that's like a separate feed in a separate page or something.

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Like, I don't want to be posting long form stuff and then it's just mixed in

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with my dags. It's just weird. I don't know.

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It's the same thing with the text posting stuff.

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They introduced text posting right when Twitter started to fall apart.

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And that could have been a huge hit if they made like a text post for you page.

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But instead, they're just like, hey, let's intermingle these boring text posts

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with super high energy videos.

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People will definitely like that.

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Tech companies have like literally no idea what they're doing anymore, y'all.

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I hope it's clear.

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But anyway, enough about TikTok.

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How about TikTok, your destination for muted videos?

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If you haven't already heard, TikTok and Universal Media Group, UMG,

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are splitting ways. UMG is a massive media publisher.

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They've got the rights to just so many artists, including like Taylor Swift

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and everyone. The contract between TikTok and UMG

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is what allowed you to use their music on your videos for freezies.

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Except not not anymore.

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Ha ha. Idiot.

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TikTok and UMG failed to come to an agreement with a new contract.

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And in return, UMG is pulling their streaming rights from TikTok,

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which means any video that you have made using UMG music on TikTok

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can no longer be streamed legally.

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And so to cover their ass, TikTok is just going to mute all of them.

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This is a reminder to record your videos outside of TikTok

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and then upload them or save a copy before posting.

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Because this happened.

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This is why I'm always a champion of having a hard copy of your files locally

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on your devices, like you cannot trust services to just maintain things.

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Even if they try real hard, even if they do everything right,

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technically, a legal situation could have them ruin your files.

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Anyway, it might come back.

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I think that there's a non-zero chance that they could go back

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and figure out the rights and unmute the videos and whatnot.

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But it's also worth noting that like TikTok isn't the one being screwed over here.

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Like, fuck UMG. I'm not defending them.

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But part of the reason they couldn't come to an agreement was

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TikTok didn't want to pay out to artists more.

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Where have I heard that before?

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So who knows, maybe someday soon, TikTok will actually pay out to artists

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what they're worth, given that music on TikTok is like the core of the app.

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We shall see.

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Ahem, ahem, ahem.

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Trans rights are human rights.

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Let's talk about some recent authoritarian and overreaching

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restrictions that lawmakers have put on their own citizens across the United States.

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A single official of the Department of Transportation in Florida

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has unilaterally determined that you are not allowed to express yourself

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on government documents.

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Instead, the government, who requires you to have this documentation,

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will determine how you are allowed to be referred to, taking away your autonomy

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and making it so that if you happen to have a piece of plastic in your pocket

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that has the letter M on it and you don't have a penis, that's illegal.

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I'm sure there are no more important things going on in that state.

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But over in Ohio, lawmakers are busy overriding the governor's veto

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of a bill that restricts health care options for citizens, specifically

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their younger citizens.

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It restricts what parents are able to do to seek health care for well documented conditions.

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It goes further to restrict what extracurriculars

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children are allowed to participate in in school based on their genitals.

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And then in Utah, Governor Cox

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Governor Cox has decided to restrict your freedom of movement

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and determine what rooms you are and are not allowed to go into based on your cocks.

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Yes, he assigned a bill into law that makes it so that depending on what government

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documents say about you, that determines what bathroom you are legally mandated to use.

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Of course, all of these bills are targeting trans people who just want to live their life,

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who are a small portion of the population that just want to be left the fuck alone

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and yet are dealing with a cavalcade of laws restricting their rights and trying to erase them.

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Laws that set precedent and hand the government more power to determine exactly how you live your life.

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We do not need more cops and we certainly do not need penis cops.

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It's social night. Congress.

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Social. Well, it's social hearing day at Congress.

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Yesterday was going well.

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Yesterday, a bunch of social media CEOs testified in front of Congress talking about child exploitation.

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We love we love this topic.

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Yeah, you had good old Zuck.

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Then you had CEOs from TikTok, Discord, Twitter and Snap.

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All who were saying, you know, we really care.

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We care. We really we do care. Kind of.

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At one point, Zuckerberg actually stood up and turned to the ocean of parents of victimized children

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that were sitting in the audience behind him.

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And he was like, sorry, bro.

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Sorry that the wealth of my empire was built atop the backs of your abused children.

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Bit of a weird statement.

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And then he, I don't know, got into his private jet and flew home to his cattle farm.

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What is going on?

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Anyway, you might see a lot of like clips from this, but not a whole lot really happened.

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It was just a lot more of like the CEOs were all like, oh, we care.

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We really care. We're focusing and investing a lot.

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And then the lawmakers were like, I don't believe you.

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So we're going to pass laws that invade people's privacy.

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So we've seen that we've seen this before and we're going to see it again.

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Lightning round.

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Some dude in the UK was pulled over by the cops because he was running around with a refrigerator strapped to his back.

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Turns out he's training to run a marathon with a refrigerator strapped to his back.

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It's for a good cause, though. He's raising money for diabetes.

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Undercover Israeli forces dressed up as women and hospital staff conducted an operation in a hospital in the West Bank where they're not at war, killing people in the hospital.

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Their official statement is that it was Hamas there operating and they've given no proof for that.

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That's a general theme when it comes to Israel and hospitals.

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Someone may have discovered the final resting place of Amelia Earhart's crashed plane.

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They use like sonar and they were under the water and they see what they think is her plane.

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Not confirmed, but that's hype.

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Elon Musk tried to give himself an over 50 billion dollar compensation package from Tesla and a court threw that out.

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To be fair, it was the Tesla board that was going to give him that compensation package.

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It was him.

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And now he's big mad.

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He's like, why can't I pay myself the exact amount of money I need to cover my losses from Twitter?

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And he insists that this payment is for the good of humanity because he has to fight the existential threat of extinction so we can go to Mars or whatever.

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And the only way we can do that is if we give Elon Musk 50 billion dollars.

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The $3,500 Apple Vision Pro AR VR headset is out and it's getting reviews and the reviews are pretty funny.

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The thing seems like it has some really, really cool tech and a lot of really impressive parts and also a lot of really stupid parts.

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A researcher has successfully used E. coli bacteria with luminescent proteins to display imagery and they used it to display doom.

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Like the video game.

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We ran doom on cells.

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Asterisk. It wasn't running on cells.

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Block, also known as Square, the payments company, is laying off a thousand people.

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And finally for today, despite having some trouble with the landing and having gone dormant for a little while, Japan's lunar rover has come back to life.

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It's charged up and it's ready to go.

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We are hype for Japanese lunar rovers.

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Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of Stuff Keeps Happening.

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Head to Stuff Keeps Happening.

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Online for sources, bonus content and the schematics to make your very own Japanese lunar lander.

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I promise it's real.

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If you like this show and you want to help me out, a great way to do that would be to leave a review on whatever podcast app you are listening to this on.

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I would greatly appreciate it.

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You can also subscribe to the newsletter at the paid tier at Stuff Keeps Happening.

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Online to support the show and get some bonus content and all that good stuff.

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I really, really appreciate it.

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My name is Endeavorance.

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I'll be back on Monday.

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Take care and be well.

