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Hello. I tried just keeping my eyes closed, but stuff still happened.

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So what's up?

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Donald Trump has been indicted again, again, again.

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I'm losing track of the agains.

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And double, this isn't even the indictment we were expecting.

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That's still coming.

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This is another indictment on top of the existing indictments around the documents stuff.

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We are still expecting an indictment very soon around January 6th involved.

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But see what happened is the ongoing investigation into the whole documents thing,

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the him hiding documents and whatnot, it's got new stuff.

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For example, he apparently directed a staffer to delete security footage

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so that the grand jury couldn't see it.

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That's an indictment.

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Also, remember that audio tape we heard of him saying,

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hey, I have this document that I shouldn't have and it's classified and I can't declassify it?

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Someone get me a Coke?

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Yeah, yeah, he's also getting indicted for that one too.

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Just a whole lot of cool stuff for a president to have done.

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So yeah, this is more of an expansion of existing indictments

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and then there's going to be more indictments soon,

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like they've been warned that another indictment is coming.

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So I'm gonna be doing this one again, again, again, forever, on loop, until I die.

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Salvation.

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I am simply a goofy boy this morning.

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But what's not goofy is conversion therapy.

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And that's also banned in Michigan now.

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Michigan has banned conversion therapy.

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If you're not familiar, conversion therapy is a theory that you can essentially beat the queer out of somebody,

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either psychologically or physically.

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It is an egregious violation of human rights and amounts to essentially genocide.

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Let's take this category of people.

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There's something wrong with them.

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Let's get rid of that.

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Makes sense.

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Seems like a thing that's gone well in the past.

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This is not even sort of remotely close to the same degree, but I'm left-handed.

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And in the past, they used to force left-handed people to not be left-handed.

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That's not cool.

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Let's not do that to queer people.

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I don't understand why people are so afraid of just letting other people just be different.

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Are you that broken?

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I want to say in no unclear terms for anyone who needs to hear this.

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You are not the problem.

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They are the problem.

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You are a problem for them, and they are scared because they are growing old and they are obsolete.

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You are incompatible with their worldview that has been carefully crafted to keep them safe

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from acknowledging the fact that they are aging out of this world.

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They are sad, broken, and insecure people lashing out in a death rattle.

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You are the light in this world.

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With that out of the way, let's talk about Tesla, because they're lying to you.

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According to a Reuters investigation, Tesla has been lying to their customers about the range of Tesla vehicles,

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both in their marketing and also the vehicle itself, just straight-up lies about how far it can drive.

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When customers were like, um, I think my car is broken because it's not reaching the distances that you told me it would,

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Tesla made sure that they didn't get service.

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They spun up a team whose sole purpose was to prevent customers from being handled.

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I mean, this is exactly on par with the rest of what the company does.

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Remember how self-driving cars were supposed to be a thing like five, ten years ago or whatever?

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Remember the Cybertruck?

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Like, yeah, they produced one, kind of.

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They also made an electric car that drives a specific distance.

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Anyway, the CEO of Tesla now wants to own an everything app that controls all parts of your online life,

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including communication, banking, and media.

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Seems like a great idea.

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If you are not familiar with R slash Place, it's a recurring event on Reddit,

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where each user can place a single pixel of color on an ever-growing canvas.

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You get another pixel that you can place every few minutes,

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and communities come together to make big pieces of art and collaborate with each other,

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and also fight against other communities for space on the canvas.

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Now, you might remember that Reddit is kind of going through it right now,

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and the Reddit CEO is not super well-loved by the user base.

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And so, this time around, R slash Place was used to creatively tell Sphez,

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the CEO of Reddit, to fuck off.

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It started off strong, with like a whole bunch of fuck Sphez everywhere,

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and then it broke down for a bit, but the last thing they did,

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when the canvas was at its biggest right before the end,

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the entire thing whited out, and they just made a giant fuck Sphez.

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Just a real beautiful work of art made by people across the web.

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Fuck Sphez.

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If you're wondering why they're saying fuck Sphez,

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all you need to know is that, you know, we just talked about Musk,

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Sphez has referred to Musk as a role model.

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He likes what Musk has done with Twitter,

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and he thinks that he should do it with Reddit.

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On this day in 1896, the city of Miami was incorporated.

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It would soon go on to find relevance as the hometown of Mr. Worldwide,

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Dale Lightning Room.

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The United States is run by some people who are a few breasts from death,

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as Mitch McConnell seemed to have some kind of stroke on live TV,

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and shortly after, Diane Feinstein was not sure what the hell was going on

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when she was supposed to just be voting on a bill,

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and multiple people had to get her attention and tell her to just say aye.

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And while old people are in positions of power,

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young people are being killed on job sites,

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and the Department of Labor would like to know

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why the hell were expanding child labor in America.

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That crane that collapsed in Manhattan,

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it ultimately injured 12 people,

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but it doesn't look like anything is life-threatening.

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Two sisters and one of their sons were found dead and partially mummified

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in a remote area of Colorado.

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They reportedly were trying to live off-grid,

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and their family tried to stop them, but they wouldn't listen.

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CD Projekt Red, the video game company that makes The Witcher and also Cyberpunk 2077,

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they're laying off 9% of their staff, about 100 people.

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And speaking of layoffs, despite laying off a bunch of people,

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Google and Microsoft just posted huge earnings this quarter.

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Twitter, now ex, just kind of took the handle at ex,

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like from the person who had it forever.

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Just booted them out.

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And finally for today, there is an incoming sequel

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to the Nickelodeon Smash Bros-like game,

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and they're going to add Squidward and Jimmy Neutron as playable characters.

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Thank you so much for listening to today's episode of Stuff Keeps Happening.

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Head to stuffkeepshappening.online for sources,

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bonus content, and air conditioning repair services.

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My name is Endeavorance.

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I'll be back on Monday.

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Take care and be well.