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Hello and welcome back to the podcast.

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I'm Michael.

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I'm Noe.

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And we are the Knights of Entertainment, a podcast covering your favorite and end to

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the movies, games, comic books, anime, and more weekly.

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Let's go ahead and get started.

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All right, guys.

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You know how we do these nights.

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We start with the news.

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All these are from the News of the Weird by Chuck Shepard, John J. Kahoot, and Roland

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Sweet.

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Now, this will be my first of two last taking of this book because I feel like I'm cheating

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by using other people's already compiled, you know, combinations.

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So after these two weeks of this book, I'm going to retire these books and I'm going

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to start finding new stories of my own.

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Now they won't always be bangers like these because these guys have collected them over

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years.

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Right.

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But every Sunday I'm going to go to the 7-Eleven and pick up some newspapers and whatever I

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find, I'm going to try to spin it into some comedy.

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So we start with this story about a former bank manager in Pittsburgh who would punish

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customers who were falling back on their loan payments by spanking them.

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What?

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Yeah, he spanked 50 customers.

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He said he had no problems with them afterwards.

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And apparently the ones that did have problems, he was found guilty later of misappropriating

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$88,000 in bank funds because he was paying the people that were going to talk about getting

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spanked by him.

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What grown man?

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Just get your ass over here.

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I bet over you, son of a bitch.

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You're going to have to fall on the payment again and you're going to spank the fucking

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rails off of him?

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I don't know, man.

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Remember, this is the greatest day of my life.

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Hell is hot now.

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I was going to say, some people probably could use that today.

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No.

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You don't want to go into a bank, it's like you defaulted again.

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No, I just...

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I don't know.

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I had a girl and she...

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The level of heart that you think right and what they can take is a whole different story.

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You're practically fucking winding up and it's still not hard enough.

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I'm like, God, your hand's fucking thronging.

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And their booty cheeks are still clapping.

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So you know, some like to get spanked real hard.

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Shit is scary.

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It's also oddly satisfying too when you reach a level that they like and they just involuntarily

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moan.

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But that's not to hear, you know what I mean?

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It's like the recoil.

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It's like, ah.

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Ah.

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I mean, I thought this ass was firm and there was no recoil.

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You know what I'm saying for you, it's like recoil damage.

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Oh yeah, it started to hurt.

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It's like, this is not the time for water.

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I ain't no quitter.

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I licked my hand and go back.

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All right.

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So in Nigeria, these two dozen Nigerian fishermen were going to lynch a witch doctor by the

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name of Ibrahim Hassan because they had alleged that he used magic to reduce the size of all

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their penises.

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Yeah, I know.

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So they were going to kill him.

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The cops get there, right?

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And the Nigerian fishermen are like, you don't believe us?

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And they all dropped their fucking pants to show them their dick size difference.

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And I'm like, okay.

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Like, I don't know how, do they measure it regularly where they're like, what the fuck's

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wrong with my dick?

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It's three inches smaller.

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And why are they attributed to him?

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No less, you know what I mean?

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The witch doctor did it.

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Yeah, like of all the people, it had to be the witch doctor.

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And watch, it was just cold outside.

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Maybe, I don't know.

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Does it get cold in Nigeria?

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It could.

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It might be cold for them.

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Yeah, I guess so.

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But man, they must have been like, they had like fucking charts and diagrams like, here

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officer C. We each lost a quarter of an inch.

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Let's see, this next one is, so this unidentified man in a wheelchair, he rolls into a gas station

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in Fremont, New York.

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He hastily assembled a rifle.

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So he put that bitch together as fast as he could.

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And then he pointed in front of these two teenagers that ran the station and demanded

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the money.

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They gave him $200.

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And then he forced one of them to roll him two blocks away to save it.

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So there you go.

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Imagine being the one to be forced.

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So you, you with the titties, get over here.

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It's just a random kid.

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He was like 14, he was just a heavy said boy.

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I want to feel him bounce behind my head as you roll me away.

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How does he hold?

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Like was he pointing?

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That's what I was thinking too.

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Like he's just like, if you fucking even dare.

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The fact they waited for him to put that shit together, I would have knocked his fucking

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teeth out.

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So you put the gun together, huh?

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Boom!

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He had to have been quick about it.

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Hastily.

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They put in hastily assembled just here.

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Come on, you son of a bitch.

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Damn it.

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God dang.

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He's missing like the, he's missing the boys.

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He's like, he just rolls away.

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It's like, fuck.

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All right.

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Next up.

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Damn it.

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I forgot my fucking timer again.

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I try to keep you within 30 and 35 minutes to have a level of consistency that I always

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fuck up by forgetting.

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So let me guys real quick put my timer on.

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No, we're good.

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We don't need to.

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So how far are we in?

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Five minutes in.

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So that means this episode's over.

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All right.

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Fix that.

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Fix that.

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Fix that.

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I'm done.

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All right, guys.

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Let's get back to it.

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What the fuck was I doing?

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Where am I?

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There I am.

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All right.

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Let's get back to it.

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So next up.

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What do we got here?

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So this guy named Fumitsu Okubo.

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He's 65 from Toyama, Japan.

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He ended up choking to death because he got trapped in his seatbelt.

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And it was on the first day of Japan's enforcement of the mandatory seatbelt law.

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So you know, there you go.

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He just couldn't handle it, having a seatbelt, mandatorily attributed to him, I guess.

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Some of these I forget why I added a clip.

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I just put a little clip, paper clips to find the page and I forget what they're fucking

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doing, I forget what I added for.

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What was the story that was so compelling that I should have did like a different like

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symbol to these fucking things?

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But anyway, it's still fun to...

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Here it is.

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Oh, this is so badly.

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Nothing against the guys that made the book.

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Well, this book has fallen to pieces.

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I don't know what kind of glue they use.

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All these pages are ripped the fuck out.

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This book has fallen apart on me.

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So this high school teacher in Fairfax, Virginia, he got transferred to an administrative job

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because they found a videotape.

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He had made a videotape on China to show the class, but he had recorded it over a film

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of gay sex and he had forgot to...

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There were still like several scenes of the gay sex acts at the end of the movie.

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So they got into some full-back, brokeback mountain type video in class.

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They got into the Tom Holland stuff and they're like, no, no, what are they doing?

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They got into Tom Holland taking back shots.

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They're all like, why is this Japan?

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This is what happens there.

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Oh my God.

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Or I mean China.

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All right, let's see.

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Next story.

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Or I guess...

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I am very haphazardly on today, but don't worry guys.

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I'm always like this.

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This is the normal.

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This is nothing new.

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This is every day.

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I think it's cool.

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This one is a fucked up story.

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This Wisconsin judge...

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These are two stories that I was mad about.

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So this Wisconsin judge, he sent this 25 year old man to three years probation for sexual

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assault on a five year old girl.

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He assaulted his girlfriend's daughter.

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He only got three years probation.

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Really?

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The judge said that the girl was unusually sexually promiscuous at five.

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And he was unable to fend off the girls advances.

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What?

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For a five year old?

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That's what I was thinking.

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I was like, you sick sons of bitches.

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Now this next story is like, what the fuck?

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Because of the first one, right?

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So he gets three years probation for that.

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This guy got 35 years in prison for stealing a 12 ounce can of spam.

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Two dollar can of spam.

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12 ounces.

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He got 35 years in jail.

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I think those sentences should have been switched.

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That's what I was thinking too.

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I had something to get.

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I'm like, this is ridiculous.

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That is fucked up.

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It is.

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Oh, some men are fucking monsters.

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I agree.

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Disgusting sons of bitches.

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God damn these papers are fucking filled to pieces, man.

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Jesus Christ.

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So the last story is these Buddhist priests in, in Buddhist, I don't know, it just says

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Buddhist priests on here.

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They're mostly like what from Nepal?

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They could be from China.

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They could be from India.

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Probably Nepal would be.

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So they, they blessed 200,000 used bras and a temple memorial service for cast off underwear

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in Tokyo.

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So it was a Japanese Buddhist.

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Yeah.

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I should have probably read further.

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Before I just pretend they were from Nepal.

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That's a lot though.

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200,000 bras.

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That's a lot.

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That's a lot of titties.

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That's a lot of titties.

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That's 400,000 titties.

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Oh man, I can only dream of so many titties.

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Last story.

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In 1985, a Catholic priest was arrested in Port Richey, Florida and charged with shoplifting

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a package of condoms.

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That's kind of ironic there, isn't it?

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A little bit.

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You find it fucking hilarious.

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The officer, I was doing, I practiced same sex with the Lord.

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I was going to say it's ironic for a couple of reasons.

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One for the scandals that they had.

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Two because Catholics don't believe in condoms.

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He did.

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He's got to be safe.

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I feel bad for the regular priest.

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They just bang women, right?

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On the sly.

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Now even they, they're like these sons of bitches were for all of us.

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You know what the really sad part is, statistically, it's not a greater number than the general

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public.

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We just hear about it more because of the...

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Well I mean they got a higher standard of morals.

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Yeah, so you better show up.

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Apparently they don't.

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Apparently they do not.

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It's a thing my mom wanted me to go to Catholic school.

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Hell no.

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Growing up.

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I'd have been fighting for my life every day.

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I'm gorgeous as fuck.

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I feel like an asshole now.

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By minimizing what they actually went through.

264
00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:30,320
But still.

265
00:11:30,320 --> 00:11:31,320
I apologize.

266
00:11:31,320 --> 00:11:32,320
That's fine.

267
00:11:32,320 --> 00:11:33,800
My fucking eyeballs are cheap.

268
00:11:33,800 --> 00:11:36,000
Anyway, so now that's it for the news.

269
00:11:36,000 --> 00:11:38,000
We move on to Cozy Kitchen.

270
00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:42,360
I have three recipes, one from our very own Michael.

271
00:11:42,360 --> 00:11:43,360
Did you poison it?

272
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:44,360
I did.

273
00:11:44,360 --> 00:11:45,360
Damn.

274
00:11:45,360 --> 00:11:47,600
So let's start off with his.

275
00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:51,880
He, it's a homemade sloppy joes.

276
00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:53,600
I got fucking papers everywhere.

277
00:11:53,600 --> 00:11:54,600
Jesus fucking Christ.

278
00:11:54,600 --> 00:11:56,600
I don't know where to put this stuff.

279
00:11:56,600 --> 00:11:57,600
Just throw it around.

280
00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:58,600
Just fucking shit.

281
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:00,440
I'm just throwing it around with shit.

282
00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:05,200
I'm like Charlie from Always Sun in Philadelphia looking for Batmate Sylvia.

283
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:10,600
Alright, so to make this homemade sloppy joe, you need two pounds ground beef, 80-20.

284
00:12:10,600 --> 00:12:12,640
What does that mean?

285
00:12:12,640 --> 00:12:15,440
80% meat, 20% fat.

286
00:12:15,440 --> 00:12:16,800
Lean ground beef basically.

287
00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:17,800
Cool.

288
00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:18,800
One yellow onion.

289
00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:19,800
Diced.

290
00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:20,800
Diced.

291
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:24,200
One, one half tablespoon of barbecue seasoning.

292
00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:27,920
One 10 ounce can road tail diced tomatoes and green chilies.

293
00:12:27,920 --> 00:12:29,400
Are they together or something?

294
00:12:29,400 --> 00:12:30,720
It comes together in one can.

295
00:12:30,720 --> 00:12:31,720
Oh nice.

296
00:12:31,720 --> 00:12:33,080
It's a Mexican specialty.

297
00:12:33,080 --> 00:12:34,280
Two thirds?

298
00:12:34,280 --> 00:12:37,480
One cup barbecue sauce, normal to thick preferred.

299
00:12:37,480 --> 00:12:39,360
Two one half tablespoons yellow mustard.

300
00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,040
How do you even make that shit?

301
00:12:41,040 --> 00:12:42,040
Cause that shit never comes off.

302
00:12:42,040 --> 00:12:46,200
How do you make it exactly two and a one half?

303
00:12:46,200 --> 00:12:47,200
Sweden bottle.

304
00:12:47,200 --> 00:12:48,200
I got a guess.

305
00:12:48,200 --> 00:12:49,200
That's why I did you.

306
00:12:49,200 --> 00:12:53,440
What the fuck you think you're gonna melt?

307
00:12:53,440 --> 00:12:57,080
One cup shredded cheddar or pepper jack cheese.

308
00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,280
Hamburger buns toast if you like.

309
00:12:59,280 --> 00:13:01,520
Pickles for topping optional.

310
00:13:01,520 --> 00:13:06,680
So in a large skillet or cast iron skillet, cook the beef over medium high heat until

311
00:13:06,680 --> 00:13:20,440
browned drain the grease or drink it like I do.

312
00:13:20,440 --> 00:13:22,920
Stir the stir the onion and seasoning.

313
00:13:22,920 --> 00:13:24,200
Cook about a minute.

314
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:26,920
Add road tail, barbecue sauce and mustard.

315
00:13:26,920 --> 00:13:31,880
Use heat to medium low and simmer for about 10 minutes stirring occasionally until heated

316
00:13:31,880 --> 00:13:35,160
through and all ingredients have time to combine well.

317
00:13:35,160 --> 00:13:39,280
I slowly mix in the cheese and let cook for a few more minutes on simmer until the cheese

318
00:13:39,280 --> 00:13:40,880
begins to melt.

319
00:13:40,880 --> 00:13:42,560
Spoon or finger the mixture.

320
00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:46,400
Spoon the mixture.

321
00:13:46,400 --> 00:13:47,400
Spoon the mixture.

322
00:13:47,400 --> 00:13:48,400
Spoon the mixture.

323
00:13:48,400 --> 00:13:49,400
Oh god.

324
00:13:49,400 --> 00:13:55,600
Man's gotta do what man's gotta do.

325
00:13:55,600 --> 00:13:59,920
Spoon the mixture into the hamburger buns and place pickles on top if you would like.

326
00:13:59,920 --> 00:14:02,840
Serve hot and fresh.

327
00:14:02,840 --> 00:14:03,840
So dig in.

328
00:14:03,840 --> 00:14:08,000
He actually made me one so I'll tell you guys how it goes when I eat it.

329
00:14:08,000 --> 00:14:10,600
Two episodes from now.

330
00:14:10,600 --> 00:14:15,080
Don't ask why two episodes from now instead of one.

331
00:14:15,080 --> 00:14:17,080
Alright next we got of course Women's World.

332
00:14:17,080 --> 00:14:18,960
Woman's World.

333
00:14:18,960 --> 00:14:22,480
The only magazine I can see and I follow religiously.

334
00:14:22,480 --> 00:14:25,840
She doesn't ask the word woman.

335
00:14:25,840 --> 00:14:29,000
Thought there'd be more titties.

336
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:30,000
But I wasn't disappointed.

337
00:14:30,000 --> 00:14:33,400
So we got barbecue chicken pizza.

338
00:14:33,400 --> 00:14:36,480
You need three tablespoons of oil.

339
00:14:36,480 --> 00:14:37,480
One shallot.

340
00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:38,480
Thinly sliced.

341
00:14:38,480 --> 00:14:40,000
I don't know what a shallot is.

342
00:14:40,000 --> 00:14:42,760
Small little onions that are expensive.

343
00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:44,400
So just regular on your zen.

344
00:14:44,400 --> 00:14:48,920
Or as Uncle Roger would say shallots are for not poor people.

345
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:49,920
Onions are for poor people.

346
00:14:49,920 --> 00:14:51,200
Bad day.

347
00:14:51,200 --> 00:14:54,520
One 10 ounce packaged thin pre-baked pizza crust.

348
00:14:54,520 --> 00:14:55,920
12 inches.

349
00:14:55,920 --> 00:14:57,640
Half a cup barbecue sauce.

350
00:14:57,640 --> 00:14:59,680
One half cup shredded rotisserie chicken.

351
00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:01,040
About 6 ounces.

352
00:15:01,040 --> 00:15:02,040
One cup shredded cheddar.

353
00:15:02,040 --> 00:15:03,040
4 ounces.

354
00:15:03,040 --> 00:15:04,040
One small tomato.

355
00:15:04,040 --> 00:15:05,600
Seeded and chopped.

356
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:07,800
One fourth cup fresh cilantro leaves.

357
00:15:07,800 --> 00:15:10,600
And sliced chili peppers are optional.

358
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:14,040
So you heat oven to 450 Fahrenheit.

359
00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:15,520
Line plate with paper towel.

360
00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:16,520
And nonstick skillet.

361
00:15:16,520 --> 00:15:20,160
Heat two teaspoons oil over medium heat.

362
00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:21,760
And is it shallot or shal-ow?

363
00:15:21,760 --> 00:15:22,760
Shallot.

364
00:15:22,760 --> 00:15:23,760
Shallots?

365
00:15:23,760 --> 00:15:24,760
Okay.

366
00:15:24,760 --> 00:15:25,760
Or if you're English it's shal-ot.

367
00:15:25,760 --> 00:15:26,760
Shal-ot.

368
00:15:26,760 --> 00:15:29,040
I always have like a weird thing of like dropping certain words.

369
00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:30,040
I feel like they're French.

370
00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:31,040
So I just say shal-ow.

371
00:15:31,040 --> 00:15:33,040
Like you know Les Miserables.

372
00:15:33,040 --> 00:15:34,040
Yeah.

373
00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:35,440
Yeah it's shallot though.

374
00:15:35,440 --> 00:15:36,800
Okay so add shallot.

375
00:15:36,800 --> 00:15:38,440
Cook stirring until golden and crisp.

376
00:15:38,440 --> 00:15:40,040
5 to 6 minutes.

377
00:15:40,040 --> 00:15:43,320
Using slotted spoon transfer to paper towel.

378
00:15:43,320 --> 00:15:46,720
Meanwhile, place a pizza crust on baking sheet.

379
00:15:46,720 --> 00:15:49,920
Brush top with remaining one tablespoon of oil.

380
00:15:49,920 --> 00:15:50,920
How many tablespoons?

381
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:51,920
Three?

382
00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:52,920
God damn.

383
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:55,280
Spread top with barbecue sauce.

384
00:15:55,280 --> 00:15:57,760
Then sprinkle with one cup chicken and cheese.

385
00:15:57,760 --> 00:16:02,080
Sprinkle tomato and remaining half cup chicken over cheese.

386
00:16:02,080 --> 00:16:05,000
Bake pizza on baking sheet until cheese is melted.

387
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:07,600
And crust is golden about 10 minutes.

388
00:16:07,600 --> 00:16:09,120
Prefer a crispier crust?

389
00:16:09,120 --> 00:16:11,860
Skip the baking sheet and bake pizza directly on oven rack.

390
00:16:11,860 --> 00:16:14,540
Or like my cousin just throw that bitch in there.

391
00:16:14,540 --> 00:16:15,760
No fucking rack or nothing.

392
00:16:15,760 --> 00:16:18,400
Watch that bitch melt on the fucking stove body.

393
00:16:18,400 --> 00:16:20,400
Like a dumb motherfucker.

394
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:22,400
Ha ha.

395
00:16:22,400 --> 00:16:25,680
I wonder why my oven's on fire all the time.

396
00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:26,680
Oh I don't know you asshole.

397
00:16:26,680 --> 00:16:27,680
Where's the fucking brain?

398
00:16:27,680 --> 00:16:28,680
Just sitting on the corner.

399
00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:29,680
Oh yeah.

400
00:16:29,680 --> 00:16:30,680
Just sitting on the corner.

401
00:16:30,680 --> 00:16:35,360
Fucking burning alive.

402
00:16:35,360 --> 00:16:39,320
Top with cooked shallot and cilantro leaves and if desired sliced chili pepper.

403
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:40,320
And on you go.

404
00:16:40,320 --> 00:16:42,020
You're looking at a serving of four?

405
00:16:42,020 --> 00:16:44,160
Or for me one?

406
00:16:44,160 --> 00:16:45,440
Active time 15 minutes.

407
00:16:45,440 --> 00:16:46,440
Total time 25 minutes.

408
00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:47,960
Doesn't actually not that much time.

409
00:16:47,960 --> 00:16:48,960
No.

410
00:16:48,960 --> 00:16:49,960
Tomato pizza wow.

411
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:51,280
Calories 470.

412
00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:52,680
Protein 26 grams.

413
00:16:52,680 --> 00:16:53,680
Fat 28.

414
00:16:53,680 --> 00:16:54,680
6 grams.

415
00:16:54,680 --> 00:16:55,680
7 grams saturated.

416
00:16:55,680 --> 00:16:57,080
Cholesterol 70 milligrams.

417
00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:58,800
Carbs 47 grams.

418
00:16:58,800 --> 00:17:00,920
Sodium is 1030 milligrams.

419
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:03,320
Holy shit.

420
00:17:03,320 --> 00:17:06,160
Get that high blood pressure while you can people.

421
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:09,400
God damn that's the highest we've had on one of these.

422
00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:12,400
Oh my god.

423
00:17:12,400 --> 00:17:16,920
Your fucking heart misses a beat.

424
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:18,960
And then fiber 1 gram and sugars 8 grams.

425
00:17:18,960 --> 00:17:20,320
God that's a lot of sodium.

426
00:17:20,320 --> 00:17:22,600
Holy hell.

427
00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:23,840
Next up is.

428
00:17:23,840 --> 00:17:25,200
Our last one is.

429
00:17:25,200 --> 00:17:28,720
Some delicious Tex-Mex casserole.

430
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:32,800
So we are looking at 12 white corn tortillas from 25 ounce package.

431
00:17:32,800 --> 00:17:33,800
I don't think it really matters.

432
00:17:33,800 --> 00:17:35,800
As long as you have 12 of them right?

433
00:17:35,800 --> 00:17:39,400
It's gotta be a 25 ounce package.

434
00:17:39,400 --> 00:17:41,080
I'm sorry I'm nitpicking.

435
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:47,400
Three cups shredded rochester chicken, one 16 ounce jar salsa, one 15.5 ounce can red

436
00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:53,300
kidney beans, rinsed drained, one 10 ounce can enchilada sauce, two cups shredded Monterey

437
00:17:53,300 --> 00:17:55,760
jack cheese and fresh cilantro leaves are optional.

438
00:17:55,760 --> 00:17:58,520
God you're gonna have the shits.

439
00:17:58,520 --> 00:18:00,920
Your heat oven to 425 Fahrenheit.

440
00:18:00,920 --> 00:18:03,240
Reserve four tortillas.

441
00:18:03,240 --> 00:18:07,440
Coat both sides of remaining eight tortillas with cooking spray.

442
00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:08,720
Place on baking sheets.

443
00:18:08,720 --> 00:18:10,240
Bake flipping once.

444
00:18:10,240 --> 00:18:14,080
Until lightly toasted three to four minutes per side.

445
00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,000
Cut all tortillas into four strips each.

446
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:18,920
Reserving toasted and untoasted tortillas separately.

447
00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:21,120
Reduce oven temperature to 350.

448
00:18:21,120 --> 00:18:24,600
In large bowl mix chicken, salsa, beans and enchilada sauce.

449
00:18:24,600 --> 00:18:28,580
Place half of toasted tortillas on in bottom of baking sheet.

450
00:18:28,580 --> 00:18:31,160
Top with half of chicken mixture and one third cheese.

451
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:32,880
Repeat layering once.

452
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:34,760
Place untoasted tortillas on top.

453
00:18:34,760 --> 00:18:35,760
Cook.

454
00:18:35,760 --> 00:18:37,480
Bake until heated through about 30 minutes.

455
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:38,480
Uncovered.

456
00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:39,780
Top with remaining cheese.

457
00:18:39,780 --> 00:18:41,920
Bake until cheese is melted eight to 10 minutes.

458
00:18:41,920 --> 00:18:44,320
If desired garnish with cilantro leaves.

459
00:18:44,320 --> 00:18:47,520
Now you are looking at oh boy calories.

460
00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:51,560
This is a serving of six for active time of 20 minutes total time an hour.

461
00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:55,400
Calories is 410.

462
00:18:55,400 --> 00:18:57,000
Protein is 35 grams so there you go.

463
00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:59,120
It's all the protein you need.

464
00:18:59,120 --> 00:19:01,240
Fat is 15 grams, seven grams saturated.

465
00:19:01,240 --> 00:19:03,000
Cholesterol is 90 milligrams.

466
00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:04,560
Carbs are 43 grams.

467
00:19:04,560 --> 00:19:07,840
Sodium is 1020 milligrams.

468
00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:11,600
Fibers three and sugars or fibers three grams and sugar four grams.

469
00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:13,600
Holy hell what is with the sodium today?

470
00:19:13,600 --> 00:19:16,000
You just want me to die huh?

471
00:19:16,000 --> 00:19:19,560
Hey to be fair the recipe I gave you doesn't really have that much salt.

472
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:20,560
That's good.

473
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:23,480
You gotta be careful guys it's not just sugar.

474
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:26,160
You also have to watch the salt intake.

475
00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:27,400
Everything in moderation.

476
00:19:27,400 --> 00:19:28,400
Everything in moderation.

477
00:19:28,400 --> 00:19:30,800
Unless you're a goon like me.

478
00:19:30,800 --> 00:19:32,800
Just guzzle the grease.

479
00:19:32,800 --> 00:19:35,360
I mean like in the sexual tears.

480
00:19:35,360 --> 00:19:36,360
You know what gooning is.

481
00:19:36,360 --> 00:19:38,000
You know you know.

482
00:19:38,000 --> 00:19:41,040
If you know what gooning is you are a goon.

483
00:19:41,040 --> 00:19:42,040
What?

484
00:19:42,040 --> 00:19:46,240
Good luck when you head out.

485
00:19:46,240 --> 00:19:50,120
I recently found out a term that I've never heard before called the Mexican Flamingo.

486
00:19:50,120 --> 00:19:51,120
I don't know what it is.

487
00:19:51,120 --> 00:19:56,280
I'm too scared to look it up.

488
00:19:56,280 --> 00:19:59,120
Alright so we're in the episode.

489
00:19:59,120 --> 00:20:01,360
We still got some time a lot of time actually.

490
00:20:01,360 --> 00:20:04,880
I must have fucked up on this one.

491
00:20:04,880 --> 00:20:06,880
So we are going to.

492
00:20:06,880 --> 00:20:08,840
We do have a shit load of time.

493
00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:10,840
What did I do wrong?

494
00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:14,520
What?

495
00:20:14,520 --> 00:20:21,480
Alright so you guys remember the story of the woman hookah doing tricks in the bathroom.

496
00:20:21,480 --> 00:20:22,480
Yes.

497
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:24,320
And that was a wild story.

498
00:20:24,320 --> 00:20:28,240
And then the sequel was that I came in there and they had found out what she was doing

499
00:20:28,240 --> 00:20:31,680
and they threw her out and she almost got into a fist fight with a homeless guy outside.

500
00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:32,680
Yes.

501
00:20:32,680 --> 00:20:33,680
Okay here's part three.

502
00:20:33,680 --> 00:20:34,680
Oh God.

503
00:20:34,680 --> 00:20:35,680
Part three of the trilogy.

504
00:20:35,680 --> 00:20:36,680
Yeah.

505
00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:40,480
Of the saga for all I know.

506
00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:45,000
So I get I've never seen a sign like this in my life.

507
00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:51,080
I get to the bathroom right and on the front of the bathroom it says I kid you not no showering.

508
00:20:51,080 --> 00:20:52,080
No shower?

509
00:20:52,080 --> 00:20:53,080
Yeah.

510
00:20:53,080 --> 00:20:57,160
There's no there's just a sink in there and a toilet.

511
00:20:57,160 --> 00:20:58,960
That's exactly what I thought.

512
00:20:58,960 --> 00:21:01,240
I'm like huh?

513
00:21:01,240 --> 00:21:06,200
They're having themselves some whore baths in these luggage.

514
00:21:06,200 --> 00:21:09,440
I've never seen a no showering sign.

515
00:21:09,440 --> 00:21:14,920
I could say no washing yourself in the sink or you know worded differently but no showering

516
00:21:14,920 --> 00:21:16,520
that's a new one.

517
00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:21,160
Like they're going in there and they're just fucking having themselves a bath.

518
00:21:21,160 --> 00:21:23,400
By the way the floor is always wet.

519
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:24,400
Is that why?

520
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:27,480
I don't know if that's why but it is always soaking wet.

521
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:30,040
Hang on do they have a drain in the middle of the floor?

522
00:21:30,040 --> 00:21:31,040
No.

523
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:34,000
It's just fucking soaked all the time on the floor.

524
00:21:34,000 --> 00:21:35,000
Always by the toilet too.

525
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:40,120
I don't know if the guys can't fucking piss or it is always fucking wet in there.

526
00:21:40,120 --> 00:21:42,440
I would not drop my pants for nothing.

527
00:21:42,440 --> 00:21:46,640
I wouldn't drop my pants anywhere actually because I only go to the restroom.

528
00:21:46,640 --> 00:21:48,120
Here's some too much information.

529
00:21:48,120 --> 00:21:50,760
I only go to the restroom butt ass naked.

530
00:21:50,760 --> 00:21:54,880
I do not like having any clothes near me when I'm taking a shit.

531
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:58,040
It's at home for you basically.

532
00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:01,680
Or if I'm feeling if I got no choice I'm going to just put my clothes over the rail

533
00:22:01,680 --> 00:22:02,680
of the fucking.

534
00:22:02,680 --> 00:22:07,840
It's like I'm taking everything.

535
00:22:07,840 --> 00:22:10,680
I'll just put it on the back of the toilet tank right.

536
00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:12,000
Like I'll just put this here.

537
00:22:12,000 --> 00:22:13,960
I'll keep my socks on of course.

538
00:22:13,960 --> 00:22:16,120
But I can't because it doesn't feel clean.

539
00:22:16,120 --> 00:22:18,760
If I wipe right and it's just on the back of my shirt.

540
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:21,960
I feel that all the time right in my head.

541
00:22:21,960 --> 00:22:25,400
So I am always butt ass naked when I take a shit.

542
00:22:25,400 --> 00:22:26,400
Don't bring it to my house.

543
00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:32,240
You're going to catch me butt ass naked in the room and in the bathroom.

544
00:22:32,240 --> 00:22:35,800
Oh man that was probably too much information but I don't really care.

545
00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:36,800
It doesn't bother me.

546
00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:37,800
Just let your Costanza in.

547
00:22:37,800 --> 00:22:38,800
Costanza in?

548
00:22:38,800 --> 00:22:39,800
Is that what he did?

549
00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:40,800
He takes his shirt off.

550
00:22:40,800 --> 00:22:41,800
Oh just his shirt?

551
00:22:41,800 --> 00:22:42,800
Amateur.

552
00:22:42,800 --> 00:22:43,800
That's close enough.

553
00:22:43,800 --> 00:22:46,440
You just take it and just the next level.

554
00:22:46,440 --> 00:22:50,360
Yeah man if I have to like I'll fold my clothes in the back of the tank and just fucking bomb

555
00:22:50,360 --> 00:22:52,480
it out.

556
00:22:52,480 --> 00:22:56,200
So yeah I would never go to the bathroom in this fucking.

557
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:57,200
I guess if I had no choice.

558
00:22:57,200 --> 00:23:00,200
If you got a shit you got a shit.

559
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:05,120
Sometimes you just got a shit.

560
00:23:05,120 --> 00:23:12,800
Alright so story two was at work a couple days ago and my coworker the manager and I

561
00:23:12,800 --> 00:23:20,280
we switched places so she would cashier and I would do the recovery because I was exhausted

562
00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:22,320
from being there all day.

563
00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:27,680
And she didn't want to do if I had known there was all this stuff where I found it.

564
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:30,080
I would have never agreed to it.

565
00:23:30,080 --> 00:23:33,240
So like I'm just zooming you know I'm just chilling no one's bothering me.

566
00:23:33,240 --> 00:23:40,640
I'm just working and this customer this regular comes in right and he's talking and I realized

567
00:23:40,640 --> 00:23:46,040
like 50 minutes into his little monologue he was talking to me.

568
00:23:46,040 --> 00:23:47,720
I was like how is he talking to me?

569
00:23:47,720 --> 00:23:48,720
I didn't mean to be rude.

570
00:23:48,720 --> 00:23:52,560
I was like I literally had no idea that he was talking to me.

571
00:23:52,560 --> 00:23:53,560
He's like no I didn't completely.

572
00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:58,400
Yeah because at the end he was like so no answer huh and I'm just like I look around

573
00:23:58,400 --> 00:23:59,960
and I'm like you talking to me?

574
00:23:59,960 --> 00:24:03,040
I'm sorry sir I had no idea.

575
00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:05,160
So he just like and we just like that's that.

576
00:24:05,160 --> 00:24:07,680
I thought that was that.

577
00:24:07,680 --> 00:24:13,760
He goes to cash out right he's got his cart and he's got his mat he was gonna buy and

578
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:19,080
my manager's cash taking the register right and this guy this tweaker comes in.

579
00:24:19,080 --> 00:24:23,080
He comes in right and he grabs a bag from off of the rack like just a bag and he puts

580
00:24:23,080 --> 00:24:26,160
it something they put their stuff in the bag no big deal if they want a free bag they can

581
00:24:26,160 --> 00:24:28,840
just ask or they just grab it because they're assholes.

582
00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:32,320
But he grabs his bag he puts his stuff in there and then he goes to the counter he's

583
00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:37,560
like look at all these letters and he just starts throwing his letters in the bag.

584
00:24:37,560 --> 00:24:38,560
I'm like uh oh.

585
00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:42,800
Well I didn't see it I think because I heard it right because I was on the other side and

586
00:24:42,800 --> 00:24:47,240
I was still doing my recovery stuff and I hear my manager start screaming like oh no

587
00:24:47,240 --> 00:24:52,080
you don't sir because he like because I still don't know what the hell happened.

588
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:56,760
Basically the customer that was talking to me right he said he was off duty but I don't

589
00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:59,040
think he was an off duty cop I think it was like a security guard or something.

590
00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:00,040
Right.

591
00:25:00,040 --> 00:25:03,080
He's like don't you go out that door if you go out that door I'm gonna beat your ass.

592
00:25:03,080 --> 00:25:07,880
So he the customer drops his stuff right he runs out to follow the guy the guy drops

593
00:25:07,880 --> 00:25:11,240
his stuff in front of the door right and he runs out too.

594
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:15,040
My manager follows him out there trying to tell the customer don't do anything we have

595
00:25:15,040 --> 00:25:18,480
him on camera don't you know risk your life for anything.

596
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:23,140
And this is when I start hearing stuff so I go out to the I go outside right and I go

597
00:25:23,140 --> 00:25:27,440
outside and the fucking tweaker is doing like the fucking rocky like you know like that

598
00:25:27,440 --> 00:25:28,440
wind-up punch.

599
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:36,240
And he's like he keeps like doing the weird like side boxing like he's basically skipping

600
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:40,200
around the customer and the customer is trying to beat him up right and he's just skipping

601
00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,520
around like you can't hit me.

602
00:25:42,520 --> 00:25:43,520
I'm like oh my god.

603
00:25:43,520 --> 00:25:46,520
That's a tweaker for you.

604
00:25:46,520 --> 00:25:50,400
He's just you know that cartoon line up I'm like oh my lord.

605
00:25:50,400 --> 00:25:56,240
So I get out there and the customer he's like if I had my gun on him it would be over like

606
00:25:56,240 --> 00:25:57,240
please don't.

607
00:25:57,240 --> 00:25:59,240
I'm just one capping that ass.

608
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:03,240
Like that's what I'm that's the last thing I want him to do is to shoot a random person.

609
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:04,240
It's gonna be like.

610
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:05,960
For a crackhead they won't go down.

611
00:26:05,960 --> 00:26:08,440
That's what I was saying you can't beat a crackhead sir.

612
00:26:08,440 --> 00:26:09,440
That's what I wanted to say.

613
00:26:09,440 --> 00:26:10,960
I'm gonna shoot him he's still gonna be out.

614
00:26:10,960 --> 00:26:15,720
So I was like oh god what the hell to do now.

615
00:26:15,720 --> 00:26:20,880
So my the manager goes back inside once I go outside because the customer finally calmed

616
00:26:20,880 --> 00:26:26,000
down and he walked back from the parking lot onto the sidewalk where the store is and the

617
00:26:26,000 --> 00:26:27,880
crackhead starts following him right.

618
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:32,520
So I step between the customer and the crackhead and I just put my hand up to the crackhead

619
00:26:32,520 --> 00:26:37,920
and to be like it's like the universe like okay you can chill and the customer's cussing

620
00:26:37,920 --> 00:26:39,240
him out behind me.

621
00:26:39,240 --> 00:26:43,640
The crackhead just looking at me now instead of him.

622
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:47,240
The customer goes back inside right and I just stand there with the fucking crackhead

623
00:26:47,240 --> 00:26:51,960
for like 10 seconds he's looking dead in each other's eyes and we both realize there's no

624
00:26:51,960 --> 00:26:53,440
violence here.

625
00:26:53,440 --> 00:26:55,020
There's no need for violence either.

626
00:26:55,020 --> 00:26:59,560
So once he realizes he can't come in I go back inside and he starts pacing outside the

627
00:26:59,560 --> 00:27:04,480
door I want my shit back because he did have his own stuff in the back.

628
00:27:04,480 --> 00:27:07,160
He just he's pacing I want my shit.

629
00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:10,840
So he can't come in he knows he can't come in but he can't leave either.

630
00:27:10,840 --> 00:27:14,400
So I'm like so the manager gives me his stuff.

631
00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:16,760
She pulls out everything that's not his that he stole right.

632
00:27:16,760 --> 00:27:20,400
He gives him I get his stuff right and I go back out there to give it to him right.

633
00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:24,800
He's like my wife died my son died and he just he fucking disappears in the night like

634
00:27:24,800 --> 00:27:25,800
fucking Batman.

635
00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:26,800
He just turned around he's fucking gone.

636
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:28,800
I just thought it was parents dying.

637
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:33,120
I was like what the fuck.

638
00:27:33,120 --> 00:27:34,120
Crack man.

639
00:27:34,120 --> 00:27:37,400
Basically man like you just hear him like at night giggling.

640
00:27:37,400 --> 00:27:43,760
It was so weird I really did not want them to get into a fight.

641
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:45,280
I didn't want the customer to shoot him.

642
00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:47,160
I didn't want the crackhead to stab him.

643
00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:49,960
I don't know why I stood in between them like I was like I was gonna do something I wasn't

644
00:27:49,960 --> 00:27:50,960
gonna do shit.

645
00:27:50,960 --> 00:27:51,960
Get shot and stabbed.

646
00:27:51,960 --> 00:27:53,880
Yeah I get shot and stabbed.

647
00:27:53,880 --> 00:28:00,360
But like because I was at the job I had to do something so I kept between both of them

648
00:28:00,360 --> 00:28:05,240
and I was more worried about the customer because trigger happy people they will they'll

649
00:28:05,240 --> 00:28:11,280
start blasting immediately and I'm like I'm not gonna get shot for any job and I and then

650
00:28:11,280 --> 00:28:14,520
now I know for a fact that if he kills it again the customer he's gonna have his gun

651
00:28:14,520 --> 00:28:16,760
on him and that's what I'm worried about now.

652
00:28:16,760 --> 00:28:17,760
Yeah.

653
00:28:17,760 --> 00:28:21,000
I'm like oh lord let me get the hell out of the way before you like he'll probably miss

654
00:28:21,000 --> 00:28:22,920
and kill everybody but the guy.

655
00:28:22,920 --> 00:28:28,600
See that's why whenever you get into a situation growing up in the hood you hear things that

656
00:28:28,600 --> 00:28:30,640
sound like fireworks you drop to the ground.

657
00:28:30,640 --> 00:28:32,400
He's no kidding.

658
00:28:32,400 --> 00:28:39,840
Oh man I just I don't know it was just weird it was surreal very surreal anyway so as I

659
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:45,040
said it was a wild week part two or not part two it's like when the next story this happened

660
00:28:45,040 --> 00:28:46,040
today.

661
00:28:46,040 --> 00:28:47,040
Fuck God.

662
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:54,680
I was coming home from work right and I stopped at the outside I'm at the stop sign for the

663
00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:58,840
parking lot or not but just like the outside not that they don't really have stops at a

664
00:28:58,840 --> 00:29:00,320
parking lot that I know of.

665
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:01,640
Yeah I know what you're talking about.

666
00:29:01,640 --> 00:29:04,960
Like the big ones do right but not like the smaller one and I'm waiting for you know the

667
00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:10,400
traffic to alleviate enough for me to turn and a cop car rolls by real slow in front

668
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:15,040
of the in front of me going you know the lane out the way I'm going I want to go.

669
00:29:15,040 --> 00:29:17,600
I'm like that's weird why is he going so slow.

670
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:21,360
So I turn I look left right it's like it's almost like a split second thing too right

671
00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:25,320
like a cop car and like you know like it's not like you think like when I explain it

672
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:29,560
it sounds like it takes like an hour but like it's split second so like that cop car is

673
00:29:29,560 --> 00:29:31,880
going real slow and like in my head I'm like why.

674
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:37,320
I turn left to see why he's going so slow and this fucking big bitch comes in the frame.

675
00:29:37,320 --> 00:29:41,800
This big fuck I don't know what the fuck it was a fucking flatbed truck on this fucking

676
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:48,320
flatbed truck with a fucking house and there was a house on this fucking truck and it was

677
00:29:48,320 --> 00:29:49,480
rolling down the fucking street.

678
00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:53,400
I'm like what the fuck is going on.

679
00:29:53,400 --> 00:29:57,380
Not only does that that one has a front and it has a cop escort on front right there's

680
00:29:57,380 --> 00:30:02,260
one on the side because this big bitch is so fucking wide it took up both the lanes

681
00:30:02,260 --> 00:30:05,160
I wanted to go and half of the opposing traffic's lane.

682
00:30:05,160 --> 00:30:06,160
Good girl.

683
00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:11,680
I was like you big motherfucker.

684
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:16,960
And I have a video to show you later and we'll try to put it into the into the actual video

685
00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:20,880
but I was like you have got to be kidding me like it was just like I've never seen it

686
00:30:20,880 --> 00:30:24,720
before it's just a it was a full fucking house like with no.

687
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:25,720
Was it a motor home?

688
00:30:25,720 --> 00:30:26,720
No.

689
00:30:26,720 --> 00:30:29,040
Or not a motor home like a mobile home on the back of a.

690
00:30:29,040 --> 00:30:30,040
No.

691
00:30:30,040 --> 00:30:31,040
No?

692
00:30:31,040 --> 00:30:32,720
No that's what was scary.

693
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:33,720
Actually I'll show you now.

694
00:30:33,720 --> 00:30:34,720
All right.

695
00:30:34,720 --> 00:30:38,160
Well the timer's still going.

696
00:30:38,160 --> 00:30:40,600
So after some expert opinion it is a mobile home.

697
00:30:40,600 --> 00:30:42,120
Yeah looks like a double wide trailer.

698
00:30:42,120 --> 00:30:46,480
It just fucking massive just rolling down the street.

699
00:30:46,480 --> 00:30:51,600
Coming back with my mind on my money and my money on my mind.

700
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:54,160
I was like you have got to be kidding me.

701
00:30:54,160 --> 00:30:55,440
And this car in front of me right.

702
00:30:55,440 --> 00:30:56,960
I don't know what she was thinking.

703
00:30:56,960 --> 00:31:01,960
She was going to try to go around because she had gone into the opposite lane to try

704
00:31:01,960 --> 00:31:04,440
to get past it and there was cars coming.

705
00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:07,440
I'm like Lane!

706
00:31:07,440 --> 00:31:08,440
No!

707
00:31:08,440 --> 00:31:10,920
She turned back so quick.

708
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:12,680
Yeah I would too.

709
00:31:12,680 --> 00:31:15,840
Because one the cop car would have stopped you to begin with.

710
00:31:15,840 --> 00:31:16,840
They would have beat the hell out of her.

711
00:31:16,840 --> 00:31:17,840
Get out of the fucking car.

712
00:31:17,840 --> 00:31:20,360
You don't see this trailer at all.

713
00:31:20,360 --> 00:31:22,160
It just beat the brakes off of some random woman.

714
00:31:22,160 --> 00:31:24,320
I mean I'll give them credit at least they had police escort.

715
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:26,600
Yeah that was what I was finding surprising.

716
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:27,600
That's interesting.

717
00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:31,120
Like they at least had enough intelligence to hey we're going to need a police escort

718
00:31:31,120 --> 00:31:32,120
to get through this area.

719
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:33,120
But you got it.

720
00:31:33,120 --> 00:31:36,940
At first I was kind of worried like I don't know where they came from right.

721
00:31:36,940 --> 00:31:41,000
But when I saw them stopped at the stoplight I'm like can they go under the stoplight?

722
00:31:41,000 --> 00:31:45,720
Like I knew it would have had to because they would have had to come across a bunch of stoplights.

723
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:49,360
But in my head like by the way you know how big a stoplight is?

724
00:31:49,360 --> 00:31:50,360
Way bigger than you think.

725
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,920
Fucking huge.

726
00:31:52,920 --> 00:31:54,360
Way bigger than what you think.

727
00:31:54,360 --> 00:31:56,280
Don't ever have one land on top of you.

728
00:31:56,280 --> 00:31:58,120
It will fucking kill you.

729
00:31:58,120 --> 00:31:59,680
Yeah they're tall.

730
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:01,640
They look so small hanging out there.

731
00:32:01,640 --> 00:32:06,840
And then I did like I did a thing like I was like wait let me take that right in my head

732
00:32:06,840 --> 00:32:07,840
right.

733
00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:12,160
So I took the size of it in my head and then I put it against the fucking pole right.

734
00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:13,880
I'm like hold on.

735
00:32:13,880 --> 00:32:15,840
This is fucking high as fuck.

736
00:32:15,840 --> 00:32:16,840
Like as like a comparison?

737
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:17,840
Yeah.

738
00:32:17,840 --> 00:32:21,040
Like it looks tiny until you actually put it against something else in your head.

739
00:32:21,040 --> 00:32:22,040
Yeah.

740
00:32:22,040 --> 00:32:25,880
And like I'm like you can probably reach the fucking light or over it to you know for the

741
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:29,520
traffic for the walk light.

742
00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:31,720
I mean that shit is fucking tall.

743
00:32:31,720 --> 00:32:32,720
And wide as fuck.

744
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:36,160
I don't know why it looks so small.

745
00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:37,160
Perspective.

746
00:32:37,160 --> 00:32:38,160
Right.

747
00:32:38,160 --> 00:32:39,520
I mean it looks like it's like tiny right.

748
00:32:39,520 --> 00:32:41,680
But man them some big bitches.

749
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:45,080
Yeah because I think they're good what three feet tall or more.

750
00:32:45,080 --> 00:32:46,600
Yeah they look like it yeah.

751
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:47,600
Yeah.

752
00:32:47,600 --> 00:32:48,600
Three or four.

753
00:32:48,600 --> 00:32:51,720
Yeah they're much much bigger than what you think.

754
00:32:51,720 --> 00:32:52,720
Yeah.

755
00:32:52,720 --> 00:32:54,840
See that's all about perspectives.

756
00:32:54,840 --> 00:32:58,240
So that means my penis is bigger than what I.

757
00:32:58,240 --> 00:32:59,240
Smaller.

758
00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:02,160
It's much smaller.

759
00:33:02,160 --> 00:33:05,160
Man that was the weirdest thing I've seen today.

760
00:33:05,160 --> 00:33:07,960
Plus with the homeless guy or not that I don't know what he was I don't know if he was homeless

761
00:33:07,960 --> 00:33:09,520
or what his deal was.

762
00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:11,000
But like he was like he was ready to go.

763
00:33:11,000 --> 00:33:12,000
Come on.

764
00:33:12,000 --> 00:33:13,000
See.

765
00:33:13,000 --> 00:33:14,000
See.

766
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:15,720
But the fight like a 1940s boxing match.

767
00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:16,720
Yeah.

768
00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:17,720
I like a.

769
00:33:17,720 --> 00:33:18,720
That's what I'll say in the three stooges.

770
00:33:18,720 --> 00:33:19,720
Where it's whoop whoop whoop whoop whoop.

771
00:33:19,720 --> 00:33:22,200
That's exactly what he was doing.

772
00:33:22,200 --> 00:33:23,560
You can see how nonchalant he was.

773
00:33:23,560 --> 00:33:26,240
And he's like I don't like he didn't want to fight him at all but he was having fun.

774
00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:28,880
He was having time in his fucking life.

775
00:33:28,880 --> 00:33:29,880
Crack man.

776
00:33:29,880 --> 00:33:30,880
Just fucking skimping as the guy.

777
00:33:30,880 --> 00:33:34,520
The customer was serious as fuck is what I found so sad.

778
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:39,160
And the homeless guy like.

779
00:33:39,160 --> 00:33:42,760
Oh my God.

780
00:33:42,760 --> 00:33:43,760
That's where it's funny to me.

781
00:33:43,760 --> 00:33:44,760
That's sad.

782
00:33:44,760 --> 00:33:49,120
Yeah it is sad but I mean it's what you got to deal with sometimes.

783
00:33:49,120 --> 00:33:50,560
It's his life.

784
00:33:50,560 --> 00:33:52,040
Every day.

785
00:33:52,040 --> 00:33:53,760
I miss Jessie Jade.

786
00:33:53,760 --> 00:33:55,560
She'll be worse than.

787
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:58,360
I've been trying to find her obituary in the Oklahoman.

788
00:33:58,360 --> 00:34:00,440
I don't think it's in there.

789
00:34:00,440 --> 00:34:01,440
Problem with not.

790
00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:03,240
Why how dare they discriminate.

791
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:06,880
It's like we don't save his horse.

792
00:34:06,880 --> 00:34:09,840
Isn't it if she's paid is it a paid service.

793
00:34:09,840 --> 00:34:10,840
I think so.

794
00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:11,840
Generally.

795
00:34:11,840 --> 00:34:12,840
I'm gonna pay for it.

796
00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:15,520
You're gonna write a eulogy for her.

797
00:34:15,520 --> 00:34:17,000
Teddy's word double D's.

798
00:34:17,000 --> 00:34:18,560
That would be so fucking.

799
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:19,880
These are long.

800
00:34:19,880 --> 00:34:22,280
I saw one once in a newspaper right.

801
00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:29,600
Where this woman her kids had gotten her the obituary.

802
00:34:29,600 --> 00:34:33,760
And it was it was the funny like she will not be missed.

803
00:34:33,760 --> 00:34:38,680
I was like God.

804
00:34:38,680 --> 00:34:44,440
Because she had left them for she had cheated on her their father with his brother had them

805
00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:49,040
left them for another man and they just fucking tore into her.

806
00:34:49,040 --> 00:34:53,600
The word count must have been priceless for them because they know the way she will not

807
00:34:53,600 --> 00:34:56,480
be missed at the end was like the icing on the cake of everything else.

808
00:34:56,480 --> 00:34:59,920
I can't remember what they said above that but they did not fucking like we didn't know

809
00:34:59,920 --> 00:35:03,160
that they were like fuck this bitch.

810
00:35:03,160 --> 00:35:05,440
This is too much of a luxury for her.

811
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:08,200
She could suffer for her.

812
00:35:08,200 --> 00:35:10,200
She will be burning in hell.

813
00:35:10,200 --> 00:35:11,600
That's basically what they said.

814
00:35:11,600 --> 00:35:14,760
I was like I kind of wouldn't read like I don't want to read all the obituaries.

815
00:35:14,760 --> 00:35:16,360
Well like it's free for that.

816
00:35:16,360 --> 00:35:18,160
If I ever came across one is that brutal.

817
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:22,560
I'd be like God dang.

818
00:35:22,560 --> 00:35:23,880
It was pretty fun.

819
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:28,320
So yeah isn't yeah you basically pay the newspaper right.

820
00:35:28,320 --> 00:35:31,200
But do they have to like greenlight it or if you pay them it could be whatever you wanted

821
00:35:31,200 --> 00:35:32,240
to say.

822
00:35:32,240 --> 00:35:37,360
I don't know actually because I would I have some tasty words for certain people who when

823
00:35:37,360 --> 00:35:41,400
they die imagine somebody you don't like and you just put to a bitch and be like fuck this

824
00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:42,400
mother.

825
00:35:42,400 --> 00:35:47,600
I think it has to be like done by somebody that they allow to do their day to worry.

826
00:35:47,600 --> 00:35:50,760
Damn I can't just pay for someone I don't like.

827
00:35:50,760 --> 00:35:51,760
I don't know.

828
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:56,340
I'd have to look into the obituary requirements.

829
00:35:56,340 --> 00:36:01,000
I hope I hope Satan makes him his bottom bitch.

830
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:05,640
That was too good of a place for.

831
00:36:05,640 --> 00:36:08,160
Well yeah if anyone knows if Jessie Jane has an obituary let me know.

832
00:36:08,160 --> 00:36:10,400
I'll read it on there.

833
00:36:10,400 --> 00:36:13,760
She seemed like a great person personality.

834
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:15,800
A normal middle aged woman.

835
00:36:15,800 --> 00:36:16,800
Yeah.

836
00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:21,960
I'm a thirsty man.

837
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:26,320
A thirsty man and the thirst can't be quenched.

838
00:36:26,320 --> 00:36:27,320
The thirsty man.

839
00:36:27,320 --> 00:36:32,360
I was just surprised that she died I was like damn that's wild.

840
00:36:32,360 --> 00:36:33,360
You know what I mean.

841
00:36:33,360 --> 00:36:36,720
Like she's what 43 and she's dead.

842
00:36:36,720 --> 00:36:37,720
Shit is fucking crazy.

843
00:36:37,720 --> 00:36:40,200
It'd be like if I like if I died of a heart attack.

844
00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:44,560
Well I'm gonna steal this from Ralphie Mae but you wouldn't be shocked.

845
00:36:44,560 --> 00:36:45,560
You know what I mean.

846
00:36:45,560 --> 00:36:49,480
Like I thought she was like she was fit as hell for her whole career her whole life.

847
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:50,480
Oh indeed.

848
00:36:50,480 --> 00:36:51,480
Drugs.

849
00:36:51,480 --> 00:36:54,480
Like if I fucking died of a heart attack you'd be like yeah.

850
00:36:54,480 --> 00:36:57,680
I thought it'd be sooner.

851
00:36:57,680 --> 00:37:02,280
I thought that coronary would get him sooner.

852
00:37:02,280 --> 00:37:06,040
But when someone healthy dies it's like a shock to people's system right.

853
00:37:06,040 --> 00:37:07,280
Yeah a little bit.

854
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:12,200
Like if fucking David Goggins fucking dropped dead I'd be like what of what.

855
00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:13,620
You know what I mean.

856
00:37:13,620 --> 00:37:17,440
But like if a 95 year old guy died you'd be like oh of age right.

857
00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:21,920
Or like if someone like 450 pounds fucking drops dead like oh you know his heart gave

858
00:37:21,920 --> 00:37:23,960
out.

859
00:37:23,960 --> 00:37:27,400
So when someone healthy died it's like it's like almost it almost makes you like why the

860
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:28,960
why am I trying to get healthy then.

861
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:33,680
I just fucking dropped dead anyway.

862
00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:36,080
Anyway sorry for the rambles but it's what we do.

863
00:37:36,080 --> 00:37:37,600
I hope you guys enjoyed.

864
00:37:37,600 --> 00:37:39,120
If we were offensive we apologize.

865
00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:40,120
We don't mean to be.

866
00:37:40,120 --> 00:37:41,120
We never are.

867
00:37:41,120 --> 00:37:42,120
We just we just say.

868
00:37:42,120 --> 00:37:43,120
I'll be siding you do.

869
00:37:43,120 --> 00:37:44,120
You may not brother.

870
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:45,120
Never mean to be offensive.

871
00:37:45,120 --> 00:37:46,120
I just can't control myself.

872
00:37:46,120 --> 00:37:48,600
I think it's funny so I always am.

873
00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:49,600
It's cool.

874
00:37:49,600 --> 00:37:52,200
So tune in next time and stay cozy.

875
00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:53,200
Cool.

876
00:37:53,200 --> 00:37:55,320
What you got for us in Urban Dictionary today.

877
00:37:55,320 --> 00:37:56,320
All right.

878
00:37:56,320 --> 00:37:59,920
Let me turn this timer on.

879
00:37:59,920 --> 00:38:03,080
So Urban Dictionary we got a whopping 10 as always.

880
00:38:03,080 --> 00:38:06,440
Of the tastiest furs I could find.

881
00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:08,960
That's my new word now tasty.

882
00:38:08,960 --> 00:38:10,960
We start with the cucumber forest.

883
00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:14,740
When a bunch of guys have their dicks out.

884
00:38:14,740 --> 00:38:19,880
Also known as a circle jerk.

885
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:20,880
Cucumber.

886
00:38:20,880 --> 00:38:23,760
The next one is called Porch.

887
00:38:23,760 --> 00:38:25,560
I don't know what this person did.

888
00:38:25,560 --> 00:38:27,520
I think it's somebody's name.

889
00:38:27,520 --> 00:38:30,760
It says to be a big fat piece of shit.

890
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:32,640
No regard for human life whatsoever.

891
00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:35,800
Overall fat bastard tax evading piece of shit.

892
00:38:35,800 --> 00:38:36,800
The last word I don't understand.

893
00:38:36,800 --> 00:38:40,280
Why he so bad at the tax evasion.

894
00:38:40,280 --> 00:38:43,600
He watches the IRS person that was trying to catch him for years.

895
00:38:43,600 --> 00:38:45,480
Couldn't fucking find him.

896
00:38:45,480 --> 00:38:46,960
Tax evading son of a bitch.

897
00:38:46,960 --> 00:38:47,960
Dirty motherfucker.

898
00:38:47,960 --> 00:38:50,800
Next one is a a boof train.

899
00:38:50,800 --> 00:38:52,680
B-O-O-F boof.

900
00:38:52,680 --> 00:38:56,000
It is multiple people butt fucking.

901
00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:57,560
I guess in a train.

902
00:38:57,560 --> 00:38:58,560
Oh.

903
00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:00,400
Yeah like a human centipede.

904
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:01,400
Oh.

905
00:39:01,400 --> 00:39:02,400
Holy dick ass.

906
00:39:02,400 --> 00:39:03,400
Oh.

907
00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:09,080
It smelled just as bad as a human centipede.

908
00:39:09,080 --> 00:39:10,080
Well we don't know.

909
00:39:10,080 --> 00:39:12,400
The next one is change purse.

910
00:39:12,400 --> 00:39:13,400
That one's simple.

911
00:39:13,400 --> 00:39:14,880
It's a dudes nutsack.

912
00:39:14,880 --> 00:39:15,880
I mean there's no.

913
00:39:15,880 --> 00:39:16,880
I mean yeah.

914
00:39:16,880 --> 00:39:17,880
Change purse.

915
00:39:17,880 --> 00:39:21,960
Next one is pocket liver.

916
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:24,760
And it's to me it's fucking hilarious because it says a tall slender man with a good sense

917
00:39:24,760 --> 00:39:27,480
of humor no direct correlation to pockets or the vital organ.

918
00:39:27,480 --> 00:39:30,760
So it's like why the fuck is he called pocket liver.

919
00:39:30,760 --> 00:39:33,880
That's what I found so ironic.

920
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:36,080
He's like what is called there.

921
00:39:36,080 --> 00:39:39,680
That's what I was thinking.

922
00:39:39,680 --> 00:39:40,680
Next one is D-bag.

923
00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:41,680
A person.

924
00:39:41,680 --> 00:39:43,520
Yeah apparently it just says D-bag.

925
00:39:43,520 --> 00:39:47,840
It says a person who goes out in New Balance tennis shoes and is unable to keep his feet

926
00:39:47,840 --> 00:39:53,760
together along with that you also have to send threatening text messages have a 250 pound

927
00:39:53,760 --> 00:39:56,160
girlfriend also have to be a hillbilly.

928
00:39:56,160 --> 00:39:59,760
Symptoms of a D-bag are big and dumb weird goatees bipolar control figuring other douche

929
00:39:59,760 --> 00:40:02,080
back reactions man titties as well.

930
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:05,920
They just look they just tore into whoever they saw one day and they just tore into this

931
00:40:05,920 --> 00:40:06,920
person.

932
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:11,360
I can think of a few people that fit the description.

933
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:14,280
Next one is olive garden.

934
00:40:14,280 --> 00:40:17,760
The act of pouring olive oil on your penis and then fucking a vagina then eating out.

935
00:40:17,760 --> 00:40:18,760
Olive garden.

936
00:40:18,760 --> 00:40:19,760
Enjoy.

937
00:40:19,760 --> 00:40:20,760
I like this one.

938
00:40:20,760 --> 00:40:26,120
This one is from log flogging.

939
00:40:26,120 --> 00:40:27,920
It's a hand job on a well in down man.

940
00:40:27,920 --> 00:40:32,160
You got to use two hands I guess.

941
00:40:32,160 --> 00:40:35,920
Log flogging basically.

942
00:40:35,920 --> 00:40:38,440
Next one is Super Bowl.

943
00:40:38,440 --> 00:40:40,640
Named for the biggest professional sporting venue.

944
00:40:40,640 --> 00:40:41,640
The national.

945
00:40:41,640 --> 00:40:44,500
I just found the Super Bowl basically.

946
00:40:44,500 --> 00:40:48,340
The national football league the Super Bowl debuted in 1966 to then has become the biggest

947
00:40:44,880 --> 00:40:57,880
With the number of specters in attendance the amount of revenue created through TV ads

948
00:40:57,880 --> 00:40:58,880
slash commercials.

949
00:40:58,880 --> 00:41:01,880
How profile celebrity attendance and TV ratings that surpass any other sporting championship

950
00:41:01,880 --> 00:41:02,880
ratings.

951
00:41:02,880 --> 00:41:04,960
It's also because it's one and done.

952
00:41:04,960 --> 00:41:08,000
Like there's no the best of seven like this is it.

953
00:41:08,000 --> 00:41:09,800
It's not like the World Series or something.

954
00:41:09,800 --> 00:41:10,800
Right.

955
00:41:10,800 --> 00:41:11,800
This is all you got.

956
00:41:11,800 --> 00:41:13,480
You got to give everything you have for this win.

957
00:41:13,480 --> 00:41:17,600
And then that to people that for people that will always be more in you know than a fucking

958
00:41:17,600 --> 00:41:19,200
like a three two out of three.

959
00:41:19,200 --> 00:41:20,640
I've never liked that.

960
00:41:20,640 --> 00:41:21,640
Yeah.

961
00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:23,200
You fucking do it and you do it one time.

962
00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:24,200
That's all you got.

963
00:41:24,200 --> 00:41:27,360
Then you go cry when your team loses like it's just the way it is.

964
00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:29,800
Just fucking ball your eyes out like damn it.

965
00:41:29,800 --> 00:41:33,800
You can be like the Buffalo Bills lose four in a row.

966
00:41:33,800 --> 00:41:35,720
The only team lose four Super Bowls in a row.

967
00:41:35,720 --> 00:41:42,840
The greatest team to never win.

968
00:41:42,840 --> 00:41:49,800
This one special came in the guy in prison with them.

969
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:50,800
I forgot.

970
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:51,800
I forgot what this was.

971
00:41:51,800 --> 00:41:56,920
I just read it and how fucking shocked I was.

972
00:41:56,920 --> 00:41:59,720
You caught your breath.

973
00:41:59,720 --> 00:42:00,720
Yeah.

974
00:42:00,720 --> 00:42:05,480
I was like oh I was like oh the guy in prison with the most couch like butthole.

975
00:42:05,480 --> 00:42:10,800
He is the most proud of the pride of all the inmates.

976
00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:11,800
Good Lord.

977
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:13,160
I'm going to become Dunster.

978
00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:16,600
So the absolute fucking train wreck.

979
00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:18,840
They must wear this man's booty called clean out.

980
00:42:18,840 --> 00:42:26,440
Oh it'd be like that one dude where he's like I like you and I want you.

981
00:42:26,440 --> 00:42:30,480
Like that one guy is like no Mr. Hanson I don't like I don't want a little boy booty.

982
00:42:30,480 --> 00:42:32,720
I want your booty.

983
00:42:32,720 --> 00:42:35,920
But he he snuck onto the Chris Hanson show to catch a predator.

984
00:42:35,920 --> 00:42:36,920
To rape Chris Hanson.

985
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:40,720
He's one of the boondocks.

986
00:42:40,720 --> 00:42:42,680
Like Chris Hanson comes out like why are you here.

987
00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:44,400
You're here to have sex with a 12 year old.

988
00:42:44,400 --> 00:42:46,320
No Mr. Hanson I don't want a little boy booty.

989
00:42:46,320 --> 00:42:47,320
I want your booty.

990
00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:52,080
I'm not into little children Mr. Hanson.

991
00:42:52,080 --> 00:42:53,080
You.

992
00:42:53,080 --> 00:42:55,280
Shit was fucking hilarious.

993
00:42:55,280 --> 00:42:57,560
Did somebody really do that on the Chris Hanson show?

994
00:42:57,560 --> 00:43:01,120
That shit would have fucking got all kinds of ratings.

995
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:03,160
Chris Hanson fighting for his life.

996
00:43:03,160 --> 00:43:05,200
He called him police.

997
00:43:05,200 --> 00:43:08,960
Yeah like in the show it took forever for the kind of thing out there.

998
00:43:08,960 --> 00:43:14,200
But he got his hands on him all kinds of ways before the cops showed up.

999
00:43:14,200 --> 00:43:17,280
All right so that's it for Urban Dictionary.

1000
00:43:17,280 --> 00:43:19,480
I hope I haven't ruined your life yet.

1001
00:43:19,480 --> 00:43:20,480
You didn't.

1002
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:21,480
I'll find a way.

1003
00:43:21,480 --> 00:43:23,560
Maybe I'll look up Mexican Flamingo.

1004
00:43:23,560 --> 00:43:24,560
Oh god.

1005
00:43:24,560 --> 00:43:25,560
I'll tell you later.

1006
00:43:25,560 --> 00:43:28,560
That'll be in the next episode.

1007
00:43:28,560 --> 00:43:29,560
Mexican Flamingo.

1008
00:43:29,560 --> 00:43:30,560
Yeah.

1009
00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:31,560
Let's look at him now.

1010
00:43:31,560 --> 00:43:32,560
Mr. Doghead.

1011
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:33,560
All right everybody give us give us a second.

1012
00:43:33,560 --> 00:43:44,200
I found him.

1013
00:43:44,200 --> 00:43:50,160
This was in the game Sherlock Holmes awakening like a detective game.

1014
00:43:50,160 --> 00:43:54,960
He's because I found a friend of you Sherlock Holmes right.

1015
00:43:54,960 --> 00:43:56,880
You're solving murder mysteries and stuff like that.

1016
00:43:56,880 --> 00:43:57,880
Right.

1017
00:43:57,880 --> 00:44:03,480
I found a note saying that some guy was caught doing a Mexican Flamingo with someone else.

1018
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:05,720
This can't be the same thing.

1019
00:44:05,720 --> 00:44:07,280
It probably is.

1020
00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:11,520
Balancing a shot glass on the tip of a penis while pouring shot and then ramming into some

1021
00:44:11,520 --> 00:44:12,520
dude's ass.

1022
00:44:12,520 --> 00:44:13,520
Oh.

1023
00:44:13,520 --> 00:44:17,800
Poor Charlie received the Mexican Flamingo.

1024
00:44:17,800 --> 00:44:19,320
Throwing the note out with the boys.

1025
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:20,800
It was never the same after that.

1026
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:22,160
I would think so.

1027
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,040
A fucking whole shot glass.

1028
00:44:24,040 --> 00:44:25,040
Good lord.

1029
00:44:25,040 --> 00:44:26,040
Oh.

1030
00:44:26,040 --> 00:44:27,040
I can do two.

1031
00:44:27,040 --> 00:44:28,040
He caught him beat.

1032
00:44:28,040 --> 00:44:29,040
I can do two.

1033
00:44:29,040 --> 00:44:30,040
Well that ruined my night.

1034
00:44:30,040 --> 00:44:36,880
Not as much as the last time.

1035
00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:40,920
That last episode we were fucked down after what we heard.

1036
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:43,760
And talked about I was fucking devastated all day.

1037
00:44:43,760 --> 00:44:47,520
See I was more devastated to learn that apparently that ain't the only time they've ever done

1038
00:44:47,520 --> 00:44:48,520
it.

1039
00:44:48,520 --> 00:44:50,920
Yeah well that's it for that'll be news next time.

1040
00:44:50,920 --> 00:44:55,240
All right ready to move on to our breakdown for the week.

1041
00:44:55,240 --> 00:44:56,240
Yeah.

1042
00:44:56,240 --> 00:44:57,300
All righty.

1043
00:44:57,300 --> 00:45:00,720
This week we have Freyrin Beyond Journeys End.

1044
00:45:00,720 --> 00:45:01,720
What's that?

1045
00:45:01,720 --> 00:45:02,720
It's an anime.

1046
00:45:02,720 --> 00:45:03,720
I imagine as much.

1047
00:45:03,720 --> 00:45:08,160
I was like asking if like context.

1048
00:45:08,160 --> 00:45:16,640
A fantasy style anime that this basically takes place after the journey to kill the

1049
00:45:16,640 --> 00:45:17,640
demon lord.

1050
00:45:17,640 --> 00:45:18,640
Okay.

1051
00:45:18,640 --> 00:45:19,640
So this is what happens after.

1052
00:45:19,640 --> 00:45:20,640
Oh afterwards?

1053
00:45:20,640 --> 00:45:21,640
Yeah.

1054
00:45:21,640 --> 00:45:22,640
Huh.

1055
00:45:22,640 --> 00:45:23,640
Kind of a weird thing.

1056
00:45:23,640 --> 00:45:25,760
That's why it's called Beyond Journeys End.

1057
00:45:25,760 --> 00:45:27,680
And Freyrin is the the mage.

1058
00:45:27,680 --> 00:45:29,200
An elven mage.

1059
00:45:29,200 --> 00:45:33,280
So episode one is called the Journeys End.

1060
00:45:33,280 --> 00:45:35,200
After defeating the demon lord.

1061
00:45:35,200 --> 00:45:36,800
Hero Heimel.

1062
00:45:36,800 --> 00:45:37,800
Priest Heiter.

1063
00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:38,800
And dwarf warrior.

1064
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:41,440
His name is say his name again?

1065
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:42,440
Heimel and Heiter.

1066
00:45:42,440 --> 00:45:44,440
Oh okay so he's a nazi.

1067
00:45:44,440 --> 00:45:46,440
Like a german.

1068
00:45:46,440 --> 00:45:47,760
Yeah like exactly.

1069
00:45:47,760 --> 00:45:48,760
Henrik Himmler.

1070
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:52,600
Oh my god.

1071
00:45:52,600 --> 00:45:53,600
It's Himmler Heimel.

1072
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:54,600
I can't.

1073
00:45:54,600 --> 00:45:55,600
Oh my lord.

1074
00:45:55,600 --> 00:45:58,960
He's saying heyer.

1075
00:45:58,960 --> 00:45:59,960
So hero.

1076
00:45:59,960 --> 00:46:03,320
By the way have you ever played South Park the secret truth?

1077
00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:08,440
They put the actual dialogue from Adolf Hitler's speeches in the game.

1078
00:46:08,440 --> 00:46:12,280
Have you seen that they also redid it in english now with AI?

1079
00:46:12,280 --> 00:46:13,280
The game?

1080
00:46:13,280 --> 00:46:15,160
No the actual speech.

1081
00:46:15,160 --> 00:46:16,600
Does it sound horrendous?

1082
00:46:16,600 --> 00:46:20,040
It sounds even worse than what you would think from german.

1083
00:46:20,040 --> 00:46:22,040
I don't know how much.

1084
00:46:22,040 --> 00:46:24,640
German's pretty hardcore.

1085
00:46:24,640 --> 00:46:27,440
Yeah but you hear it in english so it's like damn dude.

1086
00:46:27,440 --> 00:46:30,280
It's like bruh.

1087
00:46:30,280 --> 00:46:31,280
So he has Heiter.

1088
00:46:31,280 --> 00:46:32,280
Priest Heiter.

1089
00:46:32,280 --> 00:46:33,280
Oh lord.

1090
00:46:33,280 --> 00:46:34,280
Dwarf warrior Eisen.

1091
00:46:34,280 --> 00:46:35,280
That's my boy right there.

1092
00:46:35,280 --> 00:46:38,160
I'm always the dwarf.

1093
00:46:38,160 --> 00:46:42,200
With a little like what you would expect from like a viking warrior where they have the

1094
00:46:42,200 --> 00:46:43,200
horns on the ends.

1095
00:46:43,200 --> 00:46:46,520
Yeah well I hate to break the news to people.

1096
00:46:46,520 --> 00:46:47,520
Yeah they didn't have that.

1097
00:46:47,520 --> 00:46:48,520
That's not historically accurate.

1098
00:46:48,520 --> 00:46:51,080
No it's not.

1099
00:46:51,080 --> 00:46:53,280
And the elephant mage Freyrin.

1100
00:46:53,280 --> 00:46:54,800
Welcome to the royal capital.

1101
00:46:54,800 --> 00:46:59,360
Heimel, Heiter and Eisen are ready to settle down after their 10 year adventure but.

1102
00:46:59,360 --> 00:47:01,000
10 fucking years.

1103
00:47:01,000 --> 00:47:03,000
Holy shit.

1104
00:47:03,000 --> 00:47:08,000
But Freyrin whose lifespan lasts thousands of years considers 10 years barely noticeable

1105
00:47:08,000 --> 00:47:09,560
and plans to travel and learn new spells.

1106
00:47:09,560 --> 00:47:11,240
Like a weekend for him.

1107
00:47:11,240 --> 00:47:16,120
Yeah basically like she's like oh okay.

1108
00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:22,040
They watch the era meteor shower together with Freyrin promising to show them a better

1109
00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:25,880
place to watch it during the next show a shower in 50 years.

1110
00:47:25,880 --> 00:47:27,680
50 fucking years man.

1111
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:28,680
Yeah.

1112
00:47:28,680 --> 00:47:29,680
Wait how any humans?

1113
00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:31,800
Uh two of them were humans.

1114
00:47:31,800 --> 00:47:33,520
I mean they'll be dead by then.

1115
00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:34,520
Then one's a dwarf.

1116
00:47:34,520 --> 00:47:36,520
What's a dwarf lifespan?

1117
00:47:36,520 --> 00:47:37,640
They're pretty long too.

1118
00:47:37,640 --> 00:47:39,280
Pretty long but not.

1119
00:47:39,280 --> 00:47:40,280
Eternal.

1120
00:47:40,280 --> 00:47:41,280
Not as long as an elf.

1121
00:47:41,280 --> 00:47:45,800
Yeah because isn't it in the middle earth it's like elves are immortal.

1122
00:47:45,800 --> 00:47:49,920
Dwarves are long lived but humans were really long lived too.

1123
00:47:49,920 --> 00:47:51,720
Comparative to like regular humans.

1124
00:47:51,720 --> 00:47:52,720
Like to us now.

1125
00:47:52,720 --> 00:47:57,120
Like back then wasn't like uh wasn't freaking Aragorn like 90 years old?

1126
00:47:57,120 --> 00:47:58,120
I think so.

1127
00:47:58,120 --> 00:47:59,120
He was half elf.

1128
00:47:59,120 --> 00:48:00,120
Oh he was?

1129
00:48:00,120 --> 00:48:01,120
Yeah he was half elf.

1130
00:48:01,120 --> 00:48:02,120
Okay.

1131
00:48:02,120 --> 00:48:03,120
So that explains why he.

1132
00:48:03,120 --> 00:48:06,320
Because mom had done him a favor.

1133
00:48:06,320 --> 00:48:10,160
Because I know hobbits had a longer lifespan because Bilbo was like oh like he wasn't even

1134
00:48:10,160 --> 00:48:12,140
50 when he had his first adventure.

1135
00:48:12,140 --> 00:48:17,480
He was but also there's a thing where they think the ring extended his lifespan.

1136
00:48:17,480 --> 00:48:18,480
Just his?

1137
00:48:18,480 --> 00:48:19,480
Yeah.

1138
00:48:19,480 --> 00:48:20,480
Compared to his life.

1139
00:48:20,480 --> 00:48:23,080
They don't have as long of a lifespan as Bilbo Baggins did.

1140
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:26,720
Oh yeah because Sméagol was like a hobbit but he lived for like almost like a hundred

1141
00:48:26,720 --> 00:48:27,720
years or something.

1142
00:48:27,720 --> 00:48:28,720
Right because of the ring.

1143
00:48:28,720 --> 00:48:30,560
That ring really fucked him up though.

1144
00:48:30,560 --> 00:48:32,560
Yes it did.

1145
00:48:32,560 --> 00:48:37,040
So 50 years later Freyrin returns and finds Heimel and Heidr are elderly.

1146
00:48:37,040 --> 00:48:39,400
No you don't say.

1147
00:48:39,400 --> 00:48:41,240
While Aizen is middle-aged.

1148
00:48:41,240 --> 00:48:42,240
The dwarf.

1149
00:48:42,240 --> 00:48:43,240
Middle-aged.

1150
00:48:43,240 --> 00:48:44,240
Now what is middle-aged?

1151
00:48:44,240 --> 00:48:48,120
Like actually like categorized as?

1152
00:48:48,120 --> 00:48:51,760
Middle-aged would be 30s to 40s.

1153
00:48:51,760 --> 00:48:53,560
Uh oh.

1154
00:48:53,560 --> 00:48:56,920
Like 30 through almost like 50.

1155
00:48:56,920 --> 00:48:59,400
I'm an old fucking man.

1156
00:48:59,400 --> 00:49:00,920
I would consider that middle-aged.

1157
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:02,000
Okay.

1158
00:49:02,000 --> 00:49:03,000
Like younger middle-aged.

1159
00:49:03,000 --> 00:49:05,120
Well then again now with medical treatments.

1160
00:49:05,120 --> 00:49:07,360
Yeah I was about to say we gotta start like adding like a different.

1161
00:49:07,360 --> 00:49:08,360
Yeah.

1162
00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:10,000
People can live to like a hundred and be alright.

1163
00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:11,000
Yeah.

1164
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:12,000
Like think about it.

1165
00:49:12,000 --> 00:49:14,560
Look at the things Betty White was doing at almost a hundred.

1166
00:49:14,560 --> 00:49:16,840
Man she was fucking at a hundred and two.

1167
00:49:16,840 --> 00:49:18,440
After she was dead already.

1168
00:49:18,440 --> 00:49:21,120
I don't know how old she was when she died.

1169
00:49:21,120 --> 00:49:22,120
99.

1170
00:49:22,120 --> 00:49:24,880
But she was laying piped in.

1171
00:49:24,880 --> 00:49:27,360
She was 99 but like she was up doing stuff.

1172
00:49:27,360 --> 00:49:29,920
Like she wasn't inactive.

1173
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:31,680
Like obviously you still get a bunch of people like that.

1174
00:49:31,680 --> 00:49:33,080
I think it also takes some personality.

1175
00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:35,640
Like I know some people that are like in their 20s and I believe they're 50s.

1176
00:49:35,640 --> 00:49:36,640
Like 80 years old.

1177
00:49:36,640 --> 00:49:37,640
I agree.

1178
00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:38,640
They just want to be old.

1179
00:49:38,640 --> 00:49:41,320
Yeah that's why I don't look at age necessarily.

1180
00:49:41,320 --> 00:49:45,200
Like as I get older I don't look at it as like oh I'm getting older.

1181
00:49:45,200 --> 00:49:47,440
It's like I still do the same shit I used to do.

1182
00:49:47,440 --> 00:49:49,480
Still like the same things I used to like.

1183
00:49:49,480 --> 00:49:51,160
It hasn't changed for me.

1184
00:49:51,160 --> 00:49:52,160
With a caveat.

1185
00:49:52,160 --> 00:49:54,920
You have to you know like age doesn't matter.

1186
00:49:54,920 --> 00:49:57,000
The police will say different.

1187
00:49:57,000 --> 00:49:58,000
Obviously.

1188
00:49:58,000 --> 00:49:59,000
Highly different.

1189
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:00,000
Obviously.

1190
00:50:00,000 --> 00:50:03,760
Like in that respect yes but I mean like physically I don't feel much different than what I've

1191
00:50:03,760 --> 00:50:04,760
always felt like.

1192
00:50:04,760 --> 00:50:05,760
I'm 97 years old.

1193
00:50:05,760 --> 00:50:06,760
It's been 97.

1194
00:50:06,760 --> 00:50:07,760
What about you White?

1195
00:50:07,760 --> 00:50:08,760
Yeah.

1196
00:50:08,760 --> 00:50:13,760
If I get up right now my fucking ass will explode.

1197
00:50:13,760 --> 00:50:17,880
So.

1198
00:50:17,880 --> 00:50:21,760
After retrieving a dragon horn from Heimel they go on one last adventure to watch the

1199
00:50:21,760 --> 00:50:23,280
meteors again.

1200
00:50:23,280 --> 00:50:25,800
Heimel dies of old age shortly after the trip.

1201
00:50:25,800 --> 00:50:26,800
At Heimel's funeral.

1202
00:50:26,800 --> 00:50:28,800
This fucking drum's dead.

1203
00:50:28,800 --> 00:50:29,800
Yeah.

1204
00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:32,800
I feel like he was old.

1205
00:50:32,800 --> 00:50:33,800
Well damn.

1206
00:50:33,800 --> 00:50:34,800
Why do you wait 50 years?

1207
00:50:34,800 --> 00:50:35,800
Why couldn't it be five?

1208
00:50:35,800 --> 00:50:37,540
Not for her.

1209
00:50:37,540 --> 00:50:42,000
At Heimel's funeral Freyrin tearfully realizes she never really got to know him and decides

1210
00:50:42,000 --> 00:50:44,880
to learn as much about humans as possible.

1211
00:50:44,880 --> 00:50:45,880
Twenty years later.

1212
00:50:45,880 --> 00:50:48,680
Oh my god it is just fucking booking it.

1213
00:50:48,680 --> 00:50:51,800
That's how we get to a certain point.

1214
00:50:51,800 --> 00:50:52,960
Does it finally like settle out?

1215
00:50:52,960 --> 00:50:53,960
A little bit.

1216
00:50:53,960 --> 00:50:54,960
Oh god.

1217
00:50:54,960 --> 00:51:00,080
Twenty years later she returns and finds the now elderly extremely elderly Heidr has

1218
00:51:00,080 --> 00:51:01,680
adopted a war orphan.

1219
00:51:01,680 --> 00:51:02,680
Nine-year-old Fern.

1220
00:51:02,680 --> 00:51:04,200
Heidr's the dwarf right?

1221
00:51:04,200 --> 00:51:05,920
No Heidr is the priest.

1222
00:51:05,920 --> 00:51:08,200
So he's extremely elderly at this point.

1223
00:51:08,200 --> 00:51:09,200
Like 90s.

1224
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:11,000
All right because he was 20 years later.

1225
00:51:11,000 --> 00:51:12,760
Right 20 years after the 50s.

1226
00:51:12,760 --> 00:51:14,760
So 70 years later.

1227
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:17,120
So he will have 90 to 100.

1228
00:51:17,120 --> 00:51:18,680
God dang.

1229
00:51:18,680 --> 00:51:22,120
And he's adopted a war orphan nine-year-old Fern.

1230
00:51:22,120 --> 00:51:27,040
Fern has potential as a mage and Heidr who has come to fear death in his old age asks

1231
00:51:27,040 --> 00:51:31,880
Freyrin to research life extending magic and tutor Fern in her spare time.

1232
00:51:31,880 --> 00:51:36,640
Freyrin agrees after finding Fern is already remarkably skilled despite her youth.

1233
00:51:36,640 --> 00:51:39,120
Good old prodigy.

1234
00:51:39,120 --> 00:51:44,000
And it's like Heidr used to drink and gamble and all the things you wouldn't expect from

1235
00:51:44,000 --> 00:51:45,000
a priest.

1236
00:51:45,000 --> 00:51:49,480
Or all the things you do expect from a priest nowadays.

1237
00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:53,280
But now he because he used to not worry about death and now that he's so old it's like yeah

1238
00:51:53,280 --> 00:51:55,160
once you get old you're like uh-oh.

1239
00:51:55,160 --> 00:51:57,720
Yeah he's fearing death at this point.

1240
00:51:57,720 --> 00:52:00,040
Episode two is it didn't have to be magic.

1241
00:52:00,040 --> 00:52:01,520
Is it type 11?

1242
00:52:01,520 --> 00:52:02,840
Or is it healthy living?

1243
00:52:02,840 --> 00:52:03,840
It is.

1244
00:52:03,840 --> 00:52:05,720
Well episode's ruined.

1245
00:52:05,720 --> 00:52:06,720
He dropped the papers.

1246
00:52:06,720 --> 00:52:11,680
We'll see you on the next one.

1247
00:52:11,680 --> 00:52:19,560
So um Freyrin spends four years tutoring Fern while translating an ancient grimoire concerning

1248
00:52:19,560 --> 00:52:21,200
immortality.

1249
00:52:21,200 --> 00:52:27,480
Heidr becomes bedridden and Fern trains non-stop wanting Heidr to see her become a mage.

1250
00:52:27,480 --> 00:52:31,720
She reveals after the deaths of her parents Heidr stopped her from committing suicide

1251
00:52:31,720 --> 00:52:35,520
so to repay him she needs to prove she can survive on her own.

1252
00:52:35,520 --> 00:52:37,000
And this is the nine-year-old girl.

1253
00:52:37,000 --> 00:52:39,080
Who is now 11?

1254
00:52:39,080 --> 00:52:42,520
Yeah well uh two years old.

1255
00:52:42,520 --> 00:52:43,520
Four years.

1256
00:52:43,520 --> 00:52:45,720
Oh so now she's four years of tutoring so 13.

1257
00:52:45,720 --> 00:52:46,720
Okay.

1258
00:52:46,720 --> 00:52:47,720
Ish.

1259
00:52:47,720 --> 00:52:52,200
Freyrin's translation reveals nothing about life extension.

1260
00:52:52,200 --> 00:52:54,200
Which Heidr already knew apparently.

1261
00:52:54,200 --> 00:52:56,480
It was just an excuse to have Freyrin train Fern.

1262
00:52:56,480 --> 00:52:59,520
It was the only way to get her to stay to train.

1263
00:52:59,520 --> 00:53:02,200
He just dies of a heart attack?

1264
00:53:02,200 --> 00:53:06,560
Heidr dies shortly afterward.

1265
00:53:06,560 --> 00:53:11,680
So Fern joins Freyrin on her journey on her travels but is confused by the effort Freyrin

1266
00:53:11,680 --> 00:53:15,960
puts into learning spells even silly ones because Freyrin likes to go and find unique

1267
00:53:15,960 --> 00:53:19,240
weird spells and like weird uh grimoires and stuff.

1268
00:53:19,240 --> 00:53:21,840
I like to find weird odd stories and news.

1269
00:53:21,840 --> 00:53:22,840
Yeah.

1270
00:53:22,840 --> 00:53:28,160
Uh in a certain village they find a statue of Heimel that Freyrin is compelled to decorate

1271
00:53:28,160 --> 00:53:33,200
with blue moon weed a flower from Heimel's village.

1272
00:53:33,200 --> 00:53:39,320
As it is extinct they spend six months searching for even a single flower so Freyrin can save

1273
00:53:39,320 --> 00:53:40,560
it.

1274
00:53:40,560 --> 00:53:46,360
Fern is frustrated Freyrin could be helping the world yet waste years on seamlessly pointless

1275
00:53:46,360 --> 00:53:51,880
tasks because again she's immortal basically like she doesn't think about time in the same

1276
00:53:51,880 --> 00:53:52,880
way.

1277
00:53:52,880 --> 00:53:58,400
Uh Freyrin reveals Heimel inspired her spell collecting to prevent the apathy caused by

1278
00:53:58,400 --> 00:53:59,600
her lifespan.

1279
00:53:59,600 --> 00:54:02,960
So it's like he's he told her it's like why don't you love like why don't you find spells

1280
00:54:02,960 --> 00:54:07,240
you like like unique random spells because it gives her life meaning her being immortal

1281
00:54:07,240 --> 00:54:09,160
and everything you know.

1282
00:54:09,160 --> 00:54:14,200
Uh eventually they find the flower and a seed rat nest allowing Freyrin to create a field

1283
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:16,200
of them in Heimel's memory.

1284
00:54:16,200 --> 00:54:21,940
Fern realizes it is important to have passion but be it for magic or anything else.

1285
00:54:21,940 --> 00:54:27,280
So it's like a life lesson almost of don't uh rush through life trying to find stuff

1286
00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:28,280
that's useless.

1287
00:54:28,280 --> 00:54:29,280
Okay.

1288
00:54:29,280 --> 00:54:31,960
It's a good it's a good you know moral basically.

1289
00:54:31,960 --> 00:54:37,200
Uh episode three is called killing magic.

1290
00:54:37,200 --> 00:54:42,360
So Fern notices Freyrin acting suspicious and follows her on several unusual and dangerous

1291
00:54:42,360 --> 00:54:43,360
shops.

1292
00:54:43,360 --> 00:54:48,260
Freyrin admits despite her efforts she has learned almost nothing about Fern and was

1293
00:54:48,260 --> 00:54:51,280
trying to think of a gift for Fern's birthday.

1294
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:56,400
Fern is happier knowing Freyrin at least tried to look learn about her because again like

1295
00:54:56,400 --> 00:55:01,080
Freyrin used to not care about humans at all she was just like no emotion about it like

1296
00:55:01,080 --> 00:55:03,440
she really just didn't give a shit.

1297
00:55:03,440 --> 00:55:09,320
Uh Freyrin decides to revisit places that she had visited with Heimel, Heiter and Aizen.

1298
00:55:09,320 --> 00:55:15,240
The first place is a village where Freyrin sealed away Qol the demon of corruption during

1299
00:55:15,240 --> 00:55:16,240
their 10 year.

1300
00:55:16,240 --> 00:55:17,680
So I thought they killed him.

1301
00:55:17,680 --> 00:55:21,240
Well it's a demon it's one of the generals that are they sealed him away though.

1302
00:55:21,240 --> 00:55:25,200
The seal will break soon so Freyrin must defeat Qol.

1303
00:55:25,200 --> 00:55:29,440
She is surprised to learn Heimel checked the seal every year until he had died and was

1304
00:55:29,440 --> 00:55:32,840
always confident Freyrin would visit before it broke.

1305
00:55:32,840 --> 00:55:36,480
So the hero coming through even as an elderly man checking to make sure the seal is still

1306
00:55:36,480 --> 00:55:37,480
good.

1307
00:55:37,480 --> 00:55:38,640
Is this fucking chicken lock set?

1308
00:55:38,640 --> 00:55:39,640
It's okay.

1309
00:55:39,640 --> 00:55:40,880
It's good.

1310
00:55:40,880 --> 00:55:46,160
Freyrin reveals Qol invented a killing spell that bypassed all barriers and armor to strike

1311
00:55:46,160 --> 00:55:50,560
the body directly which was so powerful at the time she could only manage to seal rather

1312
00:55:50,560 --> 00:55:52,000
than destroy him.

1313
00:55:52,000 --> 00:55:58,240
Qol the demon is unsealed but Freyrin reveals in the 80 years that since she had originally

1314
00:55:58,240 --> 00:56:01,440
sealed this demon he has been asleep.

1315
00:56:01,440 --> 00:56:06,360
Human mages learned and reverse engineered his spell allowing them to develop new defense

1316
00:56:06,360 --> 00:56:07,360
spells to block it.

1317
00:56:07,360 --> 00:56:10,600
Because it's been 80 years so they figured stuff out.

1318
00:56:10,600 --> 00:56:15,360
Unable to harm them Qol is easily killed when Freyrin uses her own spell on him which he

1319
00:56:15,360 --> 00:56:16,560
does not know how to block.

1320
00:56:16,560 --> 00:56:20,720
Cause it's been 80 years.

1321
00:56:20,720 --> 00:56:23,360
Especially if you've been trapped for 80 years like you've been contemplating.

1322
00:56:23,360 --> 00:56:24,360
Yeah.

1323
00:56:24,360 --> 00:56:25,840
The minute I get out I'm gonna fucking run up.

1324
00:56:25,840 --> 00:56:30,920
The minute the second I step out of this fucking room I guarantee I'm gonna tear this village

1325
00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:33,440
up and he steps out and gets completely smoked.

1326
00:56:33,440 --> 00:56:34,440
Pretty much yes.

1327
00:56:34,440 --> 00:56:39,520
Freyrin realizes the village elder is a boy she met at the village 80 years ago.

1328
00:56:39,520 --> 00:56:40,520
Jesus.

1329
00:56:40,520 --> 00:56:42,360
Reminding her fondly of Heimel.

1330
00:56:42,360 --> 00:56:46,880
Fern also points out Heimel must have had a deep trust in Freyrin to be so certain that

1331
00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:49,720
she would return to deal with Qol the demon.

1332
00:56:49,720 --> 00:56:51,120
She'll be back.

1333
00:56:51,120 --> 00:56:56,440
Basically he put trust in her even though she was kind of like apathetic to everything.

1334
00:56:56,440 --> 00:56:57,440
Episode 4.

1335
00:56:57,440 --> 00:57:00,000
The Land Where Souls Rest.

1336
00:57:00,000 --> 00:57:05,800
In exchange for cleaning a beach Freyrin received a grimoire written by the famous mage Flame

1337
00:57:05,800 --> 00:57:09,640
or Flame even though it is a fake.

1338
00:57:09,640 --> 00:57:14,120
The work is finished by New Year where the locals traditionally watch the sunrise.

1339
00:57:14,120 --> 00:57:18,560
Freyrin a notoriously late sleeper misses sunrise during her last visit upsetting her

1340
00:57:18,560 --> 00:57:19,560
friends.

1341
00:57:19,560 --> 00:57:20,560
Her hero group.

1342
00:57:20,560 --> 00:57:25,320
Cause she slept in cause she never wants to wake up for shit.

1343
00:57:25,320 --> 00:57:29,960
Cause again being immortal she don't care about least than a day or two.

1344
00:57:29,960 --> 00:57:33,680
This time she makes it but finds the sunrise dull until she sees Fern enjoying herself

1345
00:57:33,680 --> 00:57:37,840
and realizes why missing it last time upset everyone because they were supposed to go

1346
00:57:37,840 --> 00:57:38,840
together.

1347
00:57:38,840 --> 00:57:52,360
They then visit Isen's home not having seen him in 30 years.

1348
00:57:52,360 --> 00:58:00,600
He asks for help searching for Vol Basin for Flam's genuine grimoire as Flam supposedly

1349
00:58:00,600 --> 00:58:05,000
found a way to speak to the dead and he thinks it would be beneficial for Freyrin to speak

1350
00:58:05,000 --> 00:58:08,520
with Heimel one more time since Heimel's dead.

1351
00:58:08,520 --> 00:58:14,200
Freyrin recalls Flam was her human master a thousand years ago who instructed her to

1352
00:58:14,200 --> 00:58:21,040
find her home if she ever felt regret and wanted to speak to the dead.

1353
00:58:21,040 --> 00:58:26,160
Freyrin recovers the genuine grimoire which describes were all souls goal.

1354
00:58:26,160 --> 00:58:34,880
Oriol as the northernmost point of the continent where the Demon Lord's castle is located.

1355
00:58:34,880 --> 00:58:39,440
On the way home Isen is happy Freyrin is learning to care about people and is a good teacher

1356
00:58:39,440 --> 00:58:40,800
to Fern.

1357
00:58:40,800 --> 00:58:46,960
Freyrin asks Isen to accompany them to Oriol but Isen declines citing he would slow them

1358
00:58:46,960 --> 00:58:48,720
down in his old age.

1359
00:58:48,720 --> 00:58:53,600
However Isen also reminds them that their original adventure to the Demon King's castle

1360
00:58:53,600 --> 00:58:57,320
took 10 years which Freyrin acknowledges.

1361
00:58:57,320 --> 00:58:59,800
So it's like I can't do 10 years in Vegas.

1362
00:58:59,800 --> 00:59:00,800
Oh my god woman.

1363
00:59:00,800 --> 00:59:03,800
You want to go do this again?

1364
00:59:03,800 --> 00:59:05,080
I just did this.

1365
00:59:05,080 --> 00:59:08,760
Like the mind is willing with two bodies weak.

1366
00:59:08,760 --> 00:59:11,440
Episode 5 is called Phantoms of the Dead.

1367
00:59:11,440 --> 00:59:16,920
So Freyrin acknowledges 10 years is potentially a tenth of Fern's lifespan but Fern decides

1368
00:59:16,920 --> 00:59:17,920
to follow her.

1369
00:59:17,920 --> 00:59:22,360
A short way into the journey they enter a village where several people disappeared after seeing

1370
00:59:22,360 --> 00:59:25,280
ghosts of their deceased relatives.

1371
00:59:25,280 --> 00:59:31,220
Freyrin suspects an Ein Som, a monster that lures victims with illusion magic.

1372
00:59:31,220 --> 00:59:37,080
So basically tricks them into thinking that they see a loved one and kills them after

1373
00:59:37,080 --> 00:59:38,080
seeing the illusion.

1374
00:59:38,080 --> 00:59:40,400
They cast me and put a big ol' booty on there.

1375
00:59:40,400 --> 00:59:41,400
It's like here you go.

1376
00:59:41,400 --> 00:59:43,560
I'll be caught instantly.

1377
00:59:43,560 --> 00:59:48,320
The illusions are easily destroyed with attack magic but as this involves attacking the ghosts

1378
00:59:48,320 --> 00:59:53,320
of people that they loved, even experienced warriors cannot fight back and become its

1379
00:59:53,320 --> 00:59:54,720
prey.

1380
00:59:54,720 --> 00:59:58,680
So it's like their wives or their children it'll put an illusion of whatever you care

1381
00:59:58,680 --> 00:59:59,680
about the most.

1382
00:59:59,680 --> 01:00:02,440
I find how cold hearted I actually am.

1383
01:00:02,440 --> 01:00:05,880
This sucka seven year old.

1384
01:00:05,880 --> 01:00:11,480
The Fern is almost caught by Heiter's ghost but Freyrin easily shoots Heimel's ghost.

1385
01:00:11,480 --> 01:00:12,480
Shoots with what?

1386
01:00:12,480 --> 01:00:13,480
Magic.

1387
01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:14,480
Oh.

1388
01:00:14,480 --> 01:00:15,960
Like attack magic.

1389
01:00:15,960 --> 01:00:22,200
So Fern can't kill the priest that she's seen in this illusion but Freyrin just kills Heimel's.

1390
01:00:22,200 --> 01:00:23,200
I was a...

1391
01:00:23,200 --> 01:00:24,560
Well I used to play Morrowind a lot.

1392
01:00:24,560 --> 01:00:30,880
I had a regular Xbox and they have friendly fire in the game.

1393
01:00:30,880 --> 01:00:36,000
So you can actually hit one of your teammates or allies in the game and they will just aggro

1394
01:00:36,000 --> 01:00:38,760
on you and then you have to kill them and it's like oh shit.

1395
01:00:38,760 --> 01:00:45,000
So I was hired by the Mage's Guild to escort this mage from Serenine to Vivec or some shit

1396
01:00:45,000 --> 01:00:50,160
like that and we're walking and this creature in the distance...

1397
01:00:50,160 --> 01:00:52,000
We're walking between two mountain cliffs right?

1398
01:00:52,000 --> 01:00:56,560
Well there's like in between two mountain ridges and we're walking in this little path

1399
01:00:56,560 --> 01:01:00,680
between them and I noticed this creature in the distance and I run after it, pull my sword

1400
01:01:00,680 --> 01:01:03,620
out and I'm like here we go about to beat this ass.

1401
01:01:03,620 --> 01:01:08,600
This motherfucker mage behind me throws a fireball that kills me, kills the creature,

1402
01:01:08,600 --> 01:01:12,440
kills everybody in that fucking half mile radius and I'm thinking why do you need me

1403
01:01:12,440 --> 01:01:14,400
to escort you anywhere?

1404
01:01:14,400 --> 01:01:15,840
When you can already defend yourself?

1405
01:01:15,840 --> 01:01:19,040
You fucking blew up half the town with one blast.

1406
01:01:19,040 --> 01:01:25,280
I just remember running toward the creature and I remember a fireball igniting right next

1407
01:01:25,280 --> 01:01:28,600
to me and it was just going errrrr.

1408
01:01:28,600 --> 01:01:31,360
And you have that cut screen of you dying?

1409
01:01:31,360 --> 01:01:38,560
And it just drops there and it makes this noise but they drop that errrrrr.

1410
01:01:38,560 --> 01:01:39,960
I never understood that.

1411
01:01:39,960 --> 01:01:44,040
Like where you always escort people that are way stronger than you.

1412
01:01:44,040 --> 01:01:46,320
I guess they don't know the directions.

1413
01:01:46,320 --> 01:01:48,680
I don't know who the fuck knows.

1414
01:01:48,680 --> 01:01:50,520
I just don't know where they are.

1415
01:01:50,520 --> 01:01:53,640
I hope we make sure not to fucking get in his way.

1416
01:01:53,640 --> 01:01:55,640
You take care of him.

1417
01:01:55,640 --> 01:01:59,560
God that was crazy.

1418
01:01:59,560 --> 01:02:03,760
Alright so continuing on the journey, Freyvan decides to kill a dragon to collect a grim

1419
01:02:03,760 --> 01:02:05,320
war from its nest.

1420
01:02:05,320 --> 01:02:09,920
This requires a strong warrior so she seeks out Stark, one of Aizen's students who once

1421
01:02:09,920 --> 01:02:13,680
defeated the dragon in a staring contest and now lives nearby.

1422
01:02:13,680 --> 01:02:15,960
Tony, Tony Stark.

1423
01:02:15,960 --> 01:02:20,360
Stark admits he has never killed a monster before and only won the famous staring contest

1424
01:02:20,360 --> 01:02:21,960
because he was frozen with fear.

1425
01:02:21,960 --> 01:02:25,920
He's like oh shit.

1426
01:02:25,920 --> 01:02:28,960
Freyvan gives him until morning to decide to help.

1427
01:02:28,960 --> 01:02:34,120
Feren doubts he is capable but Freyvan is confident since thanks to Aizen's training,

1428
01:02:34,120 --> 01:02:38,260
Stark possesses the strength to cut through solid rocks with his axe.

1429
01:02:38,260 --> 01:02:41,980
So he was trained by the dwarf at one point.

1430
01:02:41,980 --> 01:02:44,800
So episode 6 is called the hero of the village.

1431
01:02:44,800 --> 01:02:49,720
Also Stark admits that even though he is strong enough to take on the dragon, he is too afraid

1432
01:02:49,720 --> 01:02:50,720
to.

1433
01:02:50,720 --> 01:02:54,760
Feren encourages Stark by telling him all he needs is resolve.

1434
01:02:54,760 --> 01:02:57,880
The next day Stark reluctantly agrees to dispel the dragon.

1435
01:02:57,880 --> 01:03:03,840
I mean he's resolved but he gets fucking smashed to pieces when he fucking runs into the dragon.

1436
01:03:03,840 --> 01:03:07,120
So the next day Stark reluctantly agrees to help him.

1437
01:03:07,120 --> 01:03:12,880
However Freyvan points out that Aizen was always scared as well before a major battle.

1438
01:03:12,880 --> 01:03:18,320
So even during their journey, Aizen the dwarf would be nervous where he'd be rubbing his

1439
01:03:18,320 --> 01:03:19,320
hands and stuff.

1440
01:03:19,320 --> 01:03:22,040
I don't blame him.

1441
01:03:22,040 --> 01:03:25,500
Stark then engages the dragon and manages to kill it without needing any assistance

1442
01:03:25,500 --> 01:03:28,000
from Freyvan or Feren.

1443
01:03:28,000 --> 01:03:32,240
Freyvan collects the grimoire and Stark agrees to accompany her on her journey.

1444
01:03:32,240 --> 01:03:39,220
The trio head north to the city of Wal but find out the checkpoint is closed due to increased

1445
01:03:39,220 --> 01:03:42,240
monster activity in the northern lands.

1446
01:03:42,240 --> 01:03:45,480
Freyvan is content to stay in the city and continue her magic research but Feren and

1447
01:03:45,480 --> 01:03:49,560
Stark are real concerned when they find out it may take up to two years before the checkpoint

1448
01:03:49,560 --> 01:03:57,440
can be reopened.

1449
01:03:57,440 --> 01:04:04,200
Stark reveals to Feren that he wants to go on an adventure so that he can return to Aizen

1450
01:04:04,200 --> 01:04:06,960
to regale him with his stories.

1451
01:04:06,960 --> 01:04:11,960
Fortunately the city's castellan recognizes Freyvan and believe in that she is headed

1452
01:04:11,960 --> 01:04:15,800
north to pass by the monsters, gladly opens the checkpoint for her.

1453
01:04:15,800 --> 01:04:20,240
Freyvan and her party are given a heroes send off which embarrasses Freyvan but Feren and

1454
01:04:20,240 --> 01:04:24,840
Stark are excited that this marks the official beginning of their adventure.

1455
01:04:24,840 --> 01:04:25,840
Yay.

1456
01:04:25,840 --> 01:04:31,720
Cause Freyvan hated it whenever Heimel and Heidr and Aizen all went on this trip to begin

1457
01:04:31,720 --> 01:04:35,640
with cause they did the same shit so many years ago from the same town.

1458
01:04:35,640 --> 01:04:36,640
Right.

1459
01:04:36,640 --> 01:04:39,280
Cause she was like fuck again.

1460
01:04:39,280 --> 01:04:44,880
Cause she hates being recognized as the mage of the heroes party.

1461
01:04:44,880 --> 01:04:46,920
She just don't like it.

1462
01:04:46,920 --> 01:04:48,320
How famous are they?

1463
01:04:48,320 --> 01:04:50,040
Oh like completely famous.

1464
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:53,040
Like they have statues and shit built on them.

1465
01:04:53,040 --> 01:04:54,040
Nice.

1466
01:04:54,040 --> 01:04:58,920
So like there's episodes where they'll find statues of her and the rest of them.

1467
01:04:58,920 --> 01:04:59,920
She's like oh.

1468
01:04:59,920 --> 01:05:03,960
Like she doesn't want to relive it again.

1469
01:05:03,960 --> 01:05:06,320
Episode 7 is called Like a Fairy Tale.

1470
01:05:06,320 --> 01:05:09,560
So Freyvan and her party continue to travel north and Freyvan explains that the elven

1471
01:05:09,560 --> 01:05:14,600
race has been declining since due to their long lives they are too apathetic to even

1472
01:05:14,600 --> 01:05:15,600
reproduce.

1473
01:05:15,600 --> 01:05:20,120
Just take it in.

1474
01:05:20,120 --> 01:05:24,220
They pass by another village with statues of her and her original party who celebrate

1475
01:05:24,220 --> 01:05:26,000
liberation day.

1476
01:05:26,000 --> 01:05:29,800
Freyvan recalls a memory where Heimel was adamant the party leave behind statues of

1477
01:05:29,800 --> 01:05:35,040
themselves as reminders to Freyvan that they actually existed and are not simply fairy

1478
01:05:35,040 --> 01:05:36,040
tales.

1479
01:05:36,040 --> 01:05:37,360
So it was Heimel's idea.

1480
01:05:37,360 --> 01:05:41,080
It's like you know what get the good picture of me where he's doing all the posing and

1481
01:05:41,080 --> 01:05:43,720
shit because he wants a good statue.

1482
01:05:43,720 --> 01:05:45,160
So that way Freyvan remembers them.

1483
01:05:45,160 --> 01:05:47,920
Now you remember this now?

1484
01:05:47,920 --> 01:05:52,140
So heading to another city Freyvan spots demons and tries to attack them only to be arrested

1485
01:05:52,140 --> 01:05:55,520
by the city guards for threatening peace envoys.

1486
01:05:55,520 --> 01:06:00,140
Fern and Stark visit Freyvan in the dungeon and reveal that one of the demon lords lieutenants

1487
01:06:00,140 --> 01:06:05,000
Aura has recently regained her powers and has been waging war against the city for 28

1488
01:06:05,000 --> 01:06:06,000
years.

1489
01:06:06,000 --> 01:06:07,600
They came both sides to open peace talks.

1490
01:06:07,600 --> 01:06:11,240
God dude just add just huge amounts of numbers.

1491
01:06:11,240 --> 01:06:13,240
27 years ago.

1492
01:06:13,240 --> 01:06:15,360
For Freyvan 92 months ago.

1493
01:06:15,360 --> 01:06:20,040
It's like for her it's like decades and decades have gone by.

1494
01:06:20,040 --> 01:06:21,040
Yeah.

1495
01:06:21,040 --> 01:06:26,120
However, Freyvan warns from experience that demons are incapable of being reasoned with

1496
01:06:26,120 --> 01:06:31,160
since they only learn human language as a way to deceive humans.

1497
01:06:31,160 --> 01:06:32,440
Like they don't have no souls.

1498
01:06:32,440 --> 01:06:34,120
So you're gonna stab me?

1499
01:06:34,120 --> 01:06:36,320
Like no you stabbed me.

1500
01:06:36,320 --> 01:06:37,400
Pretty much.

1501
01:06:37,400 --> 01:06:40,920
Just as Freyvan predicted the demon peace envoy led by Lugner.

1502
01:06:40,920 --> 01:06:46,120
That's a German sounding name I've never heard in my life.

1503
01:06:46,120 --> 01:06:48,120
It's got the two dots over the U as well.

1504
01:06:48,120 --> 01:06:49,840
Oh boy.

1505
01:06:49,840 --> 01:06:54,080
Are simply there to trick the city into lowering this barrier so Aura can raise it with her

1506
01:06:54,080 --> 01:06:55,080
army.

1507
01:06:55,080 --> 01:07:00,200
However, one of his attendants Draught heads to the dungeon to assassinate Freyvan but

1508
01:07:00,200 --> 01:07:02,760
she warns him that she is far more powerful than Aura.

1509
01:07:02,760 --> 01:07:06,560
And that's how the episode ends where he's going down there saying I'll fucking kill

1510
01:07:06,560 --> 01:07:09,400
you basically.

1511
01:07:09,400 --> 01:07:12,280
So the next episode is called Freyvan the Slayer.

1512
01:07:12,280 --> 01:07:14,560
This was her name during the war.

1513
01:07:14,560 --> 01:07:17,420
Well that answered that question.

1514
01:07:17,420 --> 01:07:22,160
So Draught ignores Freyvan's warning and attacks her but she easily kills him and escapes the

1515
01:07:22,160 --> 01:07:24,040
dungeon at the same time.

1516
01:07:24,040 --> 01:07:30,120
The city's Graf, Granat, becomes suspicious about Draught's disappearance and Freyvan's

1517
01:07:30,120 --> 01:07:33,480
escape and confronts Lugner.

1518
01:07:33,480 --> 01:07:40,240
With his plot exposed, Lugner captures Granat with the intention of forcing him to disable

1519
01:07:40,240 --> 01:07:41,240
the city's barrier.

1520
01:07:41,240 --> 01:07:47,760
Meanwhile, Fern and Stark agree to warn Granat about Lugner when they come across Freyvan.

1521
01:07:47,760 --> 01:07:53,640
Freyvan refuses to help them against him, confident that the two of them are strong

1522
01:07:53,640 --> 01:07:55,400
enough to defeat him instead.

1523
01:07:55,400 --> 01:07:59,680
It's like nah you take on the demons that are in the city.

1524
01:07:59,680 --> 01:08:02,760
She believes in Fern and Stark to be able to do it though.

1525
01:08:02,760 --> 01:08:10,280
So instead, Freyvan leaves to confront Aura, this demon chief out in the fields, who is

1526
01:08:10,280 --> 01:08:12,680
waiting outside the city with her army.

1527
01:08:12,680 --> 01:08:17,360
That night, Fern and Stark sneak into the keep and work together to seriously wound

1528
01:08:17,360 --> 01:08:18,640
Lugner.

1529
01:08:18,640 --> 01:08:23,120
With Granat badly injured, the two adventurers decide to rescue him and withdraw.

1530
01:08:23,120 --> 01:08:27,480
As he heals his wound, Lugner finally realizes that Freyvan is in the city.

1531
01:08:27,480 --> 01:08:32,680
He recalls how Freyrin is also nicknamed Freyrin the Slayer, due to killing more demons than

1532
01:08:32,680 --> 01:08:34,240
anybody else in history.

1533
01:08:34,240 --> 01:08:36,680
Well, you're immortal and I'm sure that's easy.

1534
01:08:36,680 --> 01:08:39,160
You pretty much, the shit just stacks.

1535
01:08:39,160 --> 01:08:42,560
Yeah, it keeps stacking every year.

1536
01:08:42,560 --> 01:08:47,720
Outside the city, Freyrin confronts Aura face to face, and we end the episode with them

1537
01:08:47,720 --> 01:08:50,520
staring each other down basically.

1538
01:08:50,520 --> 01:08:53,720
Episode 9 is called Aura the Guillotine.

1539
01:08:53,720 --> 01:08:54,720
Aura the Guillotine.

1540
01:08:54,720 --> 01:08:55,720
Yeah.

1541
01:08:55,720 --> 01:08:56,720
He's the demon's name.

1542
01:08:56,720 --> 01:08:57,720
Yeah.

1543
01:08:57,720 --> 01:08:58,720
Guillotine and the Freyr.

1544
01:08:58,720 --> 01:08:59,720
The Flair.

1545
01:08:59,720 --> 01:09:00,720
Uh, Freyrin the Slayer.

1546
01:09:00,720 --> 01:09:01,720
Slayer, sorry.

1547
01:09:01,720 --> 01:09:02,720
And Aura the Guillotine.

1548
01:09:02,720 --> 01:09:05,720
He's in flair like she's just cutting skin off.

1549
01:09:05,720 --> 01:09:06,720
Just PAH!

1550
01:09:06,720 --> 01:09:09,440
Like, oh my god!

1551
01:09:09,440 --> 01:09:14,440
So Fern and Stark manage to get Granat to safety in the town church, where he warns that

1552
01:09:14,440 --> 01:09:20,680
Aura's trump card is a magic artifact called the Scales of Obedience, which measure the

1553
01:09:20,680 --> 01:09:23,880
amount of mana she and her opponent has.

1554
01:09:23,880 --> 01:09:27,920
The one with the greater amount of mana can then dominate the loser, which is how she

1555
01:09:27,920 --> 01:09:30,080
has created an army of puppets.

1556
01:09:30,080 --> 01:09:33,680
Dominate or dominate?

1557
01:09:33,680 --> 01:09:36,320
Not the, uh, not dominatrix type.

1558
01:09:36,320 --> 01:09:40,160
Comes out with leather strap, leather belt, I'm like, oh no!

1559
01:09:40,160 --> 01:09:42,160
I'm gonna dominate you!

1560
01:09:42,160 --> 01:09:44,160
I love you.

1561
01:09:44,160 --> 01:09:50,280
You ever seen that scene from, uh, what's the fucking movie?

1562
01:09:50,280 --> 01:09:52,600
The, uh, The Signs of the Lambs?

1563
01:09:52,600 --> 01:09:53,600
Yeah, yeah.

1564
01:09:53,600 --> 01:10:02,480
It's like, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, pow, and he's dancing.

1565
01:10:02,480 --> 01:10:06,480
You're like, I'm like, oh god.

1566
01:10:06,480 --> 01:10:15,720
I'm like, you heard.

1567
01:10:15,720 --> 01:10:20,680
You know, the weirdest thing about that actor, he played such a normal character in the TV

1568
01:10:20,680 --> 01:10:21,680
show Monk.

1569
01:10:21,680 --> 01:10:25,000
He was the chief of police.

1570
01:10:25,000 --> 01:10:26,000
Oh really?

1571
01:10:26,000 --> 01:10:27,000
Yeah.

1572
01:10:27,000 --> 01:10:28,000
I didn't know that.

1573
01:10:28,000 --> 01:10:29,000
The guy with the mustache?

1574
01:10:29,000 --> 01:10:30,000
Yeah.

1575
01:10:30,000 --> 01:10:31,000
Yeah, that's the guy with the, you fag me, hey Veevee.

1576
01:10:31,000 --> 01:10:32,000
That's it.

1577
01:10:32,000 --> 01:10:34,000
I didn't know it was the same person.

1578
01:10:34,000 --> 01:10:35,000
I was shocked.

1579
01:10:35,000 --> 01:10:36,000
I'm like, Captain?

1580
01:10:36,000 --> 01:10:37,000
What were you doing?

1581
01:10:37,000 --> 01:10:38,000
I saw Monk before I saw that.

1582
01:10:38,000 --> 01:10:39,000
Yeah, so I was like, I didn't know that.

1583
01:10:39,000 --> 01:10:40,000
It breaks, like, you see them as a real person, right?

1584
01:10:40,000 --> 01:10:41,000
Right.

1585
01:10:41,000 --> 01:10:42,000
Not as an actor until you see them in something else.

1586
01:10:42,000 --> 01:10:43,000
Plus, when he's in the movie, he's like, I'm gonna dominate you.

1587
01:10:43,000 --> 01:10:44,000
I'm gonna dominate you.

1588
01:10:44,000 --> 01:10:45,000
I'm gonna dominate you.

1589
01:10:45,000 --> 01:10:46,000
I'm gonna dominate you.

1590
01:10:46,000 --> 01:10:47,000
I'm gonna dominate you.

1591
01:10:47,000 --> 01:10:48,000
I'm gonna dominate you.

1592
01:10:48,000 --> 01:11:01,000
I'm gonna comes you.

1593
01:11:01,000 --> 01:11:08,120
I'm gonna comes you...

1594
01:11:08,120 --> 01:11:13,320
roll it puts the lotion on the skin that's what he's gonna be known for

1595
01:11:13,320 --> 01:11:17,880
basically I guarantee of any monk conventions right and they just come up

1596
01:11:17,880 --> 01:11:25,720
with lotion it does what it's told I gotta see that movie again it is so

1597
01:11:25,720 --> 01:11:28,480
true because he like legit has his fucking dick and balls tucked in between

1598
01:11:28,480 --> 01:11:34,720
his fucking legs and he's like just whips it out he went so hard on that

1599
01:11:34,720 --> 01:11:38,080
like a roll that's why I said he's gonna be known for that more than anything

1600
01:11:38,080 --> 01:11:41,200
else now and he's like his name was Buffalo Bill in the movie yeah I

1601
01:11:41,200 --> 01:11:45,100
remember that he had four losses but it's super cool it broke him that was

1602
01:11:45,100 --> 01:11:48,920
that was the origin he brought the team lost and he thought it's like they decided to

1603
01:11:48,920 --> 01:11:58,840
start killing me yeah those four losses broken all right let's see here

1604
01:11:58,840 --> 01:12:03,600
Freyren destroys one of Aura's puppets and seeing that she still has no

1605
01:12:03,600 --> 01:12:09,000
understanding of humanity concludes that she can kill her like a monster back in

1606
01:12:09,000 --> 01:12:13,760
the city Lugner and his assistant Lenny ambush Fern and Stark just a regular

1607
01:12:13,760 --> 01:12:22,800
name Lenny L I N I think it's a Len I or Lenny I'm gonna Lenny I can't

1608
01:12:22,800 --> 01:12:27,560
remember how they pronounced it in the anime well the demons initially have the

1609
01:12:27,560 --> 01:12:32,200
upper hand Stark learns that Lenny copied I Isen's fighting style from

1610
01:12:32,200 --> 01:12:36,160
observing him in battle but lacks the strength to execute his moves with

1611
01:12:36,160 --> 01:12:40,560
killing force hmm and uses that to his advantage to purposefully take a blow

1612
01:12:40,560 --> 01:12:45,280
from her axe so that he can land a killing blow on her because again he was

1613
01:12:45,280 --> 01:12:49,600
so used to training with eyes and he knows the full force of one of eyes and

1614
01:12:49,600 --> 01:12:55,840
actual attacks he's like you don't hear like he does bitch he can't look in his

1615
01:12:55,840 --> 01:13:01,400
head clear cleaved off like oh Fern seizes the initiative by taking advantage

1616
01:13:01,400 --> 01:13:05,520
of her main strength of being able to cast her spells more quickly than even

1617
01:13:05,520 --> 01:13:09,160
Frayren can eventually overwhelming Lugner's defenses and killing them oh

1618
01:13:09,160 --> 01:13:15,440
no and then we go into episode 10 is called a powerful mage so mortally

1619
01:13:15,440 --> 01:13:19,480
wounded Lugner is left to wonder how Fern is so powerful until he comes to

1620
01:13:19,480 --> 01:13:23,320
the realization that she has been suppressing her mana to look weaker than

1621
01:13:23,320 --> 01:13:30,440
she actually is oh my god that or it's Phoenix from the X-Men Apocalypse where

1622
01:13:30,440 --> 01:13:35,400
what's the name apocalypse yeah tries to take over he does something and like

1623
01:13:35,400 --> 01:13:41,800
Phoenix she was he chose her first whole full force right yeah he's like if we

1624
01:13:41,800 --> 01:13:47,520
disintegrate or he says something like I like I'm gonna pit full a pitful I

1625
01:13:47,520 --> 01:13:52,160
can't see the word right I'm trying to make it up a pitful a pitful level right

1626
01:13:52,160 --> 01:13:56,360
where he's just like I see now or when you say strong she really right she's

1627
01:13:56,360 --> 01:14:02,040
like I see the truth now disintegrates it's kind of the way he sees it because

1628
01:14:02,040 --> 01:14:05,720
like the a lot of it didn't like X-Men apocalypse yeah but I thought it was

1629
01:14:05,720 --> 01:14:11,640
brilliant that if apocalypse was was an ancient Egyptian mutant right right who

1630
01:14:11,640 --> 01:14:16,240
would transfer his consciousness to other mutants therefore taking their

1631
01:14:16,240 --> 01:14:20,720
abilities on top of what he already had so he was stacking different mutant

1632
01:14:20,720 --> 01:14:25,000
powers and what he wanted above everything else was to have full

1633
01:14:25,000 --> 01:14:30,880
omnipotence in everybody on planet Earth to him as a God so he wanted to have

1634
01:14:30,880 --> 01:14:36,040
Xavier's body and he would take his you know telepathy and he wouldn't because

1635
01:14:36,040 --> 01:14:39,160
he could he'd also enhance their powers once he'd like that I guess his ability

1636
01:14:39,160 --> 01:14:44,840
was to enhance powers his base one and if he had had that he would have

1637
01:14:44,840 --> 01:14:48,800
basically been a god on earth because he could he could be in everybody's head at

1638
01:14:48,800 --> 01:14:52,000
the exact same time right that would have been I want to see an apocalypse

1639
01:14:52,000 --> 01:14:58,880
like an apocalypse like victory comic book tie-in where he actually won

1640
01:14:58,880 --> 01:15:02,080
right see what the world would look like if he could control like then you could

1641
01:15:02,080 --> 01:15:05,200
you couldn't hide from him you couldn't the only person that would be okay would

1642
01:15:05,200 --> 01:15:10,000
be Magneto with that fucking helmet so they'd be making those helmets

1643
01:15:10,000 --> 01:15:14,200
like as they'd be trying hard as hell to make those fucking helmets so you

1644
01:15:14,200 --> 01:15:16,160
always have a little like you have a little splinter group that tries to

1645
01:15:16,160 --> 01:15:20,280
oppose yeah but you can never keep the like in public you have to not have the

1646
01:15:20,280 --> 01:15:24,760
helmet on and everybody's mind would it would be fucking crazy like it would be

1647
01:15:24,760 --> 01:15:27,640
impossible to do anything to apocalypse because he could read your fucking mind

1648
01:15:27,640 --> 01:15:34,360
yeah and he could do it across the whole world without the Cerebro right and like

1649
01:15:34,360 --> 01:15:37,080
he didn't need like take over like and he threw all everyone's fucking nuclear

1650
01:15:37,080 --> 01:15:42,680
bombs into space yeah like fuck your powers yeah because he had connected to

1651
01:15:42,680 --> 01:15:47,960
make he's connected to Xavier to make him to Cerebro one time because he was

1652
01:15:47,960 --> 01:15:53,560
yeah cuz he got caught by apocalypse he tried to use Cerebro to find apocalypse

1653
01:15:53,560 --> 01:15:57,880
he's like like come on was like he had that weird like who's in my head and he

1654
01:15:57,880 --> 01:16:02,280
actually flipped it and took over his body and then he like took over

1655
01:16:02,280 --> 01:16:06,720
everybody in the world's brain right that shit is like terrifying to me

1656
01:16:06,720 --> 01:16:11,320
because you can't get in this is this place is a minefield of evil stay away

1657
01:16:11,320 --> 01:16:22,800
from my head they'd run as soon as I get in but no they're like so you fan your

1658
01:16:22,800 --> 01:16:30,200
fans are threesome with a clown in a mine brother so you leave my fantasies

1659
01:16:30,200 --> 01:16:37,280
load you just the worst most disgusting thing you could take or it'd be funny

1660
01:16:37,280 --> 01:16:40,040
if like they don't even comment they just could leave my head and they just

1661
01:16:40,040 --> 01:16:43,360
look at me and then they leave shaking their hand just not even shaking their

1662
01:16:43,360 --> 01:16:46,440
head like they just stare me down and it's like utter silence and they just

1663
01:16:46,440 --> 01:16:48,840
walk

1664
01:16:50,080 --> 01:17:00,880
are you the best there was like hey look at dip out yeah all right so in a

1665
01:17:00,880 --> 01:17:06,200
flashback to a thousand years ago god dang she was a flum it comes across a

1666
01:17:06,200 --> 01:17:10,000
destroyed elven village and finds Freyran the only survivor having managed

1667
01:17:10,000 --> 01:17:14,280
to kill the demon general attacking her flum decides to take Freyran on as her

1668
01:17:14,280 --> 01:17:18,240
apprentice and teaches her how to indefinitely suppress her mana so that's

1669
01:17:18,240 --> 01:17:23,720
where Freyran how to do this and then she taught Fern she also teaches Freyran

1670
01:17:23,720 --> 01:17:27,400
how to fight demons since demons are proud and self-confident in their own

1671
01:17:27,400 --> 01:17:31,360
magic and are incapable of suppressing their own mana she explains that by

1672
01:17:31,360 --> 01:17:35,000
suppressing theirs they can trick the demons into feeling a false sense of

1673
01:17:35,000 --> 01:17:39,520
security where they can be destroyed in a surprise attack demons are too pompous

1674
01:17:39,520 --> 01:17:44,280
I'll be here before I just get him in the eyes it's all you need and they're

1675
01:17:44,280 --> 01:17:50,080
like oh and her last instruction to Freyran is to keep training in

1676
01:17:50,080 --> 01:17:53,480
suppressing her mana and live in obscurity until she is powerful enough

1677
01:17:53,480 --> 01:17:58,080
to defeat the demon king okay so that's what happened that's how for a

1678
01:17:58,080 --> 01:18:02,560
nap came so powerful right but so like the demon king was killed before the

1679
01:18:02,560 --> 01:18:07,040
series started right yes so he's gone yes okay and these are like little

1680
01:18:07,040 --> 01:18:11,080
generals that were left that's a rival yeah yeah so a thousand years later

1681
01:18:11,080 --> 01:18:15,000
Heimel and his party tracked down Freyran and attempt to recruit her seeing

1682
01:18:15,000 --> 01:18:20,760
that Heimel is instinctively sense of it can instinctively sense her true power

1683
01:18:20,760 --> 01:18:25,120
Freyran decides to join them and that's how she joined their party originally in

1684
01:18:25,120 --> 01:18:30,240
the present aura uses the scales of obedience but is horrified when Freyran

1685
01:18:30,240 --> 01:18:33,760
shows the true extent of her mana because she was suppressing it the

1686
01:18:33,760 --> 01:18:37,400
entire time that is just like a little field around her when she was

1687
01:18:37,400 --> 01:18:44,120
suppressing it and then it's just like expands like fuck oh shit I was so blind

1688
01:18:44,120 --> 01:18:49,000
so then aura is dominated by Freyran and is forced to behead herself under

1689
01:18:49,000 --> 01:18:52,720
Freyran's order ouch that's what apocalypse would have done

1690
01:18:52,720 --> 01:18:59,920
get yourself over yourself on the farm yeah we're done with you so episode 11

1691
01:18:59,920 --> 01:19:05,040
winter in the northern lands is a title of it after paying proper respects to

1692
01:19:05,040 --> 01:19:10,080
aura's victims and enjoying granades hospitality Freyran and her party

1693
01:19:10,080 --> 01:19:16,040
continues on their journey but plans to drop by alburst or out of boosts if it's

1694
01:19:16,040 --> 01:19:21,200
German a large magical city in the northern lands to get a first-class mage

1695
01:19:21,200 --> 01:19:24,240
certification that will enable them to travel through the northern plateau

1696
01:19:24,240 --> 01:19:29,320
however on the way they get lost in a blizzard in a foot of the Schwimmer

1697
01:19:29,320 --> 01:19:36,480
mountains and Stark begins to suffer hypothermia oh it's real cold out here

1698
01:19:36,480 --> 01:19:41,200
fortunately they find an emergency cabin and meet an elven monk named craft

1699
01:19:41,200 --> 01:19:45,200
Freyran and her party stay with craft inside the cabin for six months to ride

1700
01:19:45,200 --> 01:19:48,960
out the winter craft then confides in Freyran that he decided to worship the

1701
01:19:48,960 --> 01:19:52,720
goddess of this world because with all of his old friends dead and his

1702
01:19:52,720 --> 01:19:56,960
accomplishments long forgotten only she can remember his deeds and praise him

1703
01:19:56,960 --> 01:20:00,120
whenever he finally goes to heaven that's why you got to write a book yeah

1704
01:20:00,120 --> 01:20:03,320
everyone should write their own autobiography he then asks about

1705
01:20:03,320 --> 01:20:07,840
Freyran's past offering to praise her in the place of the goddess this triggers

1706
01:20:07,840 --> 01:20:11,440
a flashback where heiter once said the exact same words to Freyran and she

1707
01:20:11,440 --> 01:20:16,240
decided declines crafts offer stating somebody has already praised her craft

1708
01:20:16,240 --> 01:20:20,240
advises that Freyran cherish her friends and companions before parting ways with

1709
01:20:20,240 --> 01:20:25,120
her and her party so he tried to worship what he was of her Freyran well no he

1710
01:20:25,120 --> 01:20:29,480
was saying that if you don't want the goddess to recognize you I will but you

1711
01:20:29,480 --> 01:20:33,240
think they're both so long-lived she's like no no he's a she's like somebody

1712
01:20:33,240 --> 01:20:37,560
else already praised me at one point heiter the priest just completely ruined

1713
01:20:37,560 --> 01:20:41,540
this man like he tried so hard like oh let me have this one courtesy to

1714
01:20:41,540 --> 01:20:45,280
worship you she's like nah well his response he's like oh I see

1715
01:20:45,280 --> 01:20:51,600
oh well fuck you and the last one we'll cover for today because there's a

1716
01:20:51,600 --> 01:20:57,000
there's no end to the actual series it just keeps going so episode one he's not

1717
01:20:57,000 --> 01:21:01,560
that far now how many of us do this one have I think at the moment it's got

1718
01:21:01,560 --> 01:21:07,800
somewhere around 20 ish episodes or more amateurs but the season's not through

1719
01:21:07,800 --> 01:21:12,880
yet so I'll go to season to episode 12 and then we'll finish it again whatever

1720
01:21:12,880 --> 01:21:18,480
the season actually ends okay so episode 12 is called a real hero so on their way

1721
01:21:18,480 --> 01:21:22,280
to our burst Freyran and her party stopped by the village of the sword the

1722
01:21:22,280 --> 01:21:26,640
resting place of the legendary heroes sword so that Freyran can fulfill her

1723
01:21:26,640 --> 01:21:31,000
obligation to regularly regularly clear out the monsters attracted by the sword

1724
01:21:31,000 --> 01:21:36,000
itself huh Sark sees the hero sword still embedded in the zone and is

1725
01:21:36,000 --> 01:21:39,560
confused because he was told stories that Heimel successfully pulled the store

1726
01:21:39,560 --> 01:21:45,160
of the sword from the stone so the whole you know yeah Arthur like type thing

1727
01:21:45,160 --> 01:21:49,160
three and legends yeah so that's incorporated into this so there's a sword

1728
01:21:49,160 --> 01:21:54,480
in the stone Freyran you know is a real one yeah in Italy and we'll let me pull

1729
01:21:54,480 --> 01:21:58,600
it out there apparently too many people have tried and they cause some problems

1730
01:21:58,600 --> 01:22:01,720
so now they have it encased in fucking glass though really you fucking assholes

1731
01:22:01,720 --> 01:22:07,520
I want chance to be the king of Italy so Freyran remarks that Heimel failed

1732
01:22:07,520 --> 01:22:13,240
failed at pulling the sword but stories claimed otherwise are the fact she then

1733
01:22:13,240 --> 01:22:17,760
recalls how Heimel was not discouraged at all simply saying that he will prove

1734
01:22:17,760 --> 01:22:21,280
himself a hero by defeating the demon Lord without the sword itself what if

1735
01:22:21,280 --> 01:22:25,240
like it was what if it wasn't like a stone right like a small one and he's

1736
01:22:25,240 --> 01:22:29,360
like fuck it so he just starts using it as a club if you know what I mean like

1737
01:22:29,360 --> 01:22:35,640
you never actually pulls it out if you think the people who want people's the

1738
01:22:35,640 --> 01:22:40,720
party then heads to the next town where Fern learns it is Starks 18th birthday so

1739
01:22:40,720 --> 01:22:44,680
she asks him what gift he would like Stark reveals that he is not used to

1740
01:22:44,680 --> 01:22:48,680
getting present because his warrior family never celebrated them believing

1741
01:22:48,680 --> 01:22:52,840
he was a foyer for it too once a year for my birthday my family would try to

1742
01:22:52,840 --> 01:22:57,720
kill me happy birthday they considered him a

1743
01:22:57,720 --> 01:23:02,120
foyer too for being a coward especially whenever he ran away whenever a monster

1744
01:23:02,120 --> 01:23:06,760
attacked her village Fern reassures him that she and Freyran will make sure he

1745
01:23:06,760 --> 01:23:10,680
will not run away and helps him buy a silver bracelet upon returning to the

1746
01:23:10,680 --> 01:23:14,680
end Freyran has prepared hamburger steaks which Eisen has always traditionally

1747
01:23:14,680 --> 01:23:19,360
done on birthdays Oh hamburgers hamburgers a random choice well

1748
01:23:19,360 --> 01:23:23,040
hamburger steaks hamburger steaks you know like we're without the bun and with

1749
01:23:23,040 --> 01:23:27,040
like a sauce on top huh interesting they're really good to

1750
01:23:27,040 --> 01:23:32,720
very the Freyran reveals to Stark that among warrior cultures a hamburger steak

1751
01:23:32,720 --> 01:23:39,920
or a Hamburg steak since it's Japan is given to those I want my fucking double

1752
01:23:39,920 --> 01:23:45,480
big man is given to those acknowledged by his trying their hardest this triggers

1753
01:23:45,480 --> 01:23:50,080
a memory of her older brother of his older brother Stoltz secretly cooking a

1754
01:23:50,080 --> 01:23:53,720
Hamburg steak on his birthday as well as being the person telling Stark to flee

1755
01:23:53,720 --> 01:23:57,640
the village so that he can live Stark then feels some closure realizing that

1756
01:23:57,640 --> 01:24:02,680
his brother truly did love him even though his father may have died but yep

1757
01:24:02,680 --> 01:24:08,520
that's where we'll go ahead and in the the dive into this anime until the anime

1758
01:24:08,520 --> 01:24:15,320
actually finishes out and we can finish this one all right already anything

1759
01:24:15,320 --> 01:24:20,480
else Ted before we head on to reddit would you bug me

1760
01:24:20,480 --> 01:24:31,760
normally this is so fucking grotesquely low we're done all righty uh these are

1761
01:24:31,760 --> 01:24:38,120
today I fucked ups again as always first one is by the dude LA so this person

1762
01:24:38,120 --> 01:24:43,640
puts so I met this knockout 510 Eastern European girl we hit it off immediately

1763
01:24:43,640 --> 01:24:48,880
she was smart successful and funny but guy she was gorgeous and could have been

1764
01:24:48,880 --> 01:24:54,000
in high fashion model it could have been a high fashion model except she had big

1765
01:24:54,000 --> 01:25:00,360
boobs and ass Stephanie a guy who do you think me why is this relevant after our

1766
01:25:00,360 --> 01:25:03,780
fourth date we were getting along great and she opened up to me about her

1767
01:25:03,780 --> 01:25:08,120
insecurity about her weight and how since she was 13 years old the other girls

1768
01:25:08,120 --> 01:25:12,760
made fun of her because of her boobs this was my dream how was that it seems

1769
01:25:12,760 --> 01:25:16,480
like an odd thing to make me make fun of somebody for you I'm gonna shoot with

1770
01:25:16,480 --> 01:25:20,640
your big fat

1771
01:25:22,640 --> 01:25:26,920
I guess any big women pick any I guess they found your one like insecurity my

1772
01:25:26,920 --> 01:25:31,440
guess is that she was like like like a knockout around them right mm-hmm so

1773
01:25:31,440 --> 01:25:35,040
they were so insecure you had to find something to make fun of her own and that

1774
01:25:35,040 --> 01:25:39,160
was the only good fine just big had to be apparently that bothered her and

1775
01:25:39,160 --> 01:25:45,600
there's a really really sad story in on writing by Stephen King about some girl

1776
01:25:45,600 --> 01:25:49,740
in school it is fucking depressing if anyone wants to read it have a look it

1777
01:25:49,740 --> 01:25:55,040
up but it is the saddest shit I've ever read I went home that night so happy I

1778
01:25:55,040 --> 01:26:00,280
had dreams of love and happiness ever after I'm never gonna dance again

1779
01:26:00,280 --> 01:26:06,760
cue the fuck up cue the fuck up I fucked up now I woke up in the morning

1780
01:26:06,760 --> 01:26:14,720
excited to start the rest of my life hard as a fucking rock rock I grabbed my

1781
01:26:14,720 --> 01:26:18,760
phone to text my girl and wish her good morning I typed rapidly and hit send

1782
01:26:18,760 --> 01:26:23,200
instead of sending good morning darling I fat fingered it and either type dating

1783
01:26:23,200 --> 01:26:29,160
or farling and the autocorrect changed it to fatling good job so good morning my

1784
01:26:29,160 --> 01:26:34,600
good fat lane good morning fatly good morning you fat titty bitch is what I

1785
01:26:34,600 --> 01:26:37,760
text a girl of my dreams the morning after she opened up to me about her

1786
01:26:37,760 --> 01:26:42,080
trauma I didn't even realize until she texted me what the fuck did you call me

1787
01:26:42,080 --> 01:26:46,320
nothing beautiful there was no explaining my way out I sincerely begged

1788
01:26:46,320 --> 01:26:50,600
her to understand that there is no way I would have ever wrote that it's not a

1789
01:26:50,600 --> 01:26:56,360
word in my vocabulary fat lane is the less us fatly she wasn't hearing any of

1790
01:26:56,360 --> 01:27:02,840
it I never saw her again damn cuz he caught her fatly he fucked up

1791
01:27:02,840 --> 01:27:11,680
next one is by mr. Zorg mr. Zorg yeah so this person puts last night I booked a

1792
01:27:11,680 --> 01:27:16,840
hotel to hook a booked a hotel to hook up with this really cute girl I met on

1793
01:27:16,840 --> 01:27:21,000
bumble long story short fucking bumble damn that's supposed to be the

1794
01:27:21,000 --> 01:27:24,960
legitimate one I know where the women make all the choice right

1795
01:27:24,960 --> 01:27:32,760
long story short they don't pick me this is my first hookup in over six years so

1796
01:27:32,760 --> 01:27:36,680
I was feeling quite a bit nervous about the whole thing to the point that I was

1797
01:27:36,680 --> 01:27:41,640
experiencing experiencing some ED in the days approaching the date which had

1798
01:27:41,640 --> 01:27:45,520
never happened to me before and so nervous your dick doesn't work mm-hmm

1799
01:27:45,520 --> 01:27:49,880
oh I told my closest friend about this situation and he gave me a little

1800
01:27:49,880 --> 01:27:56,840
land ram he laughed his ass off for 45 minutes straight so he gave me a 25

1801
01:27:56,840 --> 01:28:02,200
milligram viagra 25 give me give me two of those and if I didn't I cut it in

1802
01:28:02,200 --> 01:28:07,200
half to take it and take it about 30 minutes before hooking up well the

1803
01:28:07,200 --> 01:28:10,560
moment arrives and I take it I decided not to tell my date to avoid the obvious

1804
01:28:10,560 --> 01:28:14,320
embarrassment of Edie but instead of hooking up right away we decided to go

1805
01:28:14,320 --> 01:28:18,280
grab a drink oh we're sitting at the bar while chatting and sipping cocktails

1806
01:28:18,280 --> 01:28:23,040
whenever I start noticing my face get flush I ignore it and continue the convo

1807
01:28:23,040 --> 01:28:27,480
pretty soon I start feeling dizzy the oxygen starts to get sucked out of the

1808
01:28:27,480 --> 01:28:35,120
room I have a history of vessel Vogel what's the handle fuck I don't know

1809
01:28:35,120 --> 01:28:40,280
what it is let me say Vasa Vogel where is he fucking a

1810
01:28:40,280 --> 01:29:01,160
what the fuck is that I don't know do you have a vagina like VAG VAG AL like

1811
01:29:01,160 --> 01:29:12,280
vagina vaginal weird so so I chose so I know the signs of whenever I'm about to

1812
01:29:12,280 --> 01:29:16,520
pass out oh lord I took two steps off of the barstool and collapsed onto the

1813
01:29:16,520 --> 01:29:20,800
restaurant quite his dick so big he was just passing on the budget registered my

1814
01:29:20,800 --> 01:29:25,840
penis and I just fucking knock out I wake up in a pile of sweat seen my date

1815
01:29:25,840 --> 01:29:30,480
and this big guy standing over me they both helped me sit it just fucking hard

1816
01:29:30,480 --> 01:29:34,600
is a rock too I can already tell what you're gonna say they both have me sit

1817
01:29:34,600 --> 01:29:38,240
in the booth my legs elevated and waitress brings me some water obviously I

1818
01:29:38,240 --> 01:29:42,000
was quite embarrassed but I tried my best to own up to the sheer absurdity of the

1819
01:29:42,000 --> 01:29:45,640
situation by cracking jokes while I recovered luckily this girl was super

1820
01:29:45,640 --> 01:29:51,000
cool about it but we understandably did not have sex after that I'm not we just

1821
01:29:51,000 --> 01:29:54,080
went back to the hotel and smoked weed a Taco Bell talked and watched

1822
01:29:54,080 --> 01:29:57,240
documentaries which was honestly pretty chill and fun on its own

1823
01:29:57,240 --> 01:30:03,080
Taco Bell was he consummate oh no oh you know what you want to look up talk about

1824
01:30:03,080 --> 01:30:07,320
good for that you might just keep sitting there with a heart on it too

1825
01:30:07,320 --> 01:30:17,000
that's weird a little bit next one is by OV do hi oh we do hi this person puts me

1826
01:30:17,000 --> 01:30:20,640
and my girlfriend we're having some fun times like we usually do one position I

1827
01:30:20,640 --> 01:30:25,200
like to give her oral is her sitting on my face having some fun times I know

1828
01:30:25,200 --> 01:30:29,880
he's lying out his asshole no worries we had done it many times before but this

1829
01:30:29,880 --> 01:30:33,840
time was different she got carried away and dropped all her weight onto my face

1830
01:30:33,840 --> 01:30:41,360
slash chin and I was struggling and died like a man bro but she feels about she

1831
01:30:41,360 --> 01:30:45,960
was about to bust so I couldn't stop and be a loser I heard a crack but didn't

1832
01:30:45,960 --> 01:30:50,160
feel anything she got off after finishing and it broke his nose and I

1833
01:30:50,160 --> 01:30:54,080
tried to talk about my jar jaw hurt a lot she broke his jaw holy shit I

1834
01:30:54,080 --> 01:30:59,040
disjointed my jaw I'll give you an oral disjointed yeah just isn't it

1835
01:30:59,040 --> 01:31:04,040
dislocated no just like not dislocated like popped it all the way off good lord

1836
01:31:04,040 --> 01:31:09,520
yeah how are they frown after a couple of try you want to be a fucking hollering

1837
01:31:09,520 --> 01:31:14,640
no oh god after a couple of tries I managed to put it back in place but in

1838
01:31:14,640 --> 01:31:18,760
the following days it would come back to what it was and it was kind of hurting so

1839
01:31:18,760 --> 01:31:23,120
I panicked and wanted to make a visit to the dog yeah why are that shit shut now

1840
01:31:23,120 --> 01:31:27,840
so I panicked and after and wanted to make a visit to the doc but after a

1841
01:31:27,840 --> 01:31:32,360
couple of days it stopped hurting and I started to enjoy cracking my jaw like

1842
01:31:32,360 --> 01:31:36,040
you do with two fingers good lord oh so you're ruining his

1843
01:31:36,040 --> 01:31:40,160
fucking jaw yeah so I never went to the dock and I don't feel any pain today the

1844
01:31:40,160 --> 01:31:44,520
jaw is still disjointed you can't tell while looking at me but I can feel it

1845
01:31:44,520 --> 01:31:48,560
and crack it as much as I want it feels kind of good we joke about it regularly

1846
01:31:48,560 --> 01:31:54,800
now it's like dude go to a fucking doctor don't be funny I'm saying oh I can I

1847
01:31:54,800 --> 01:32:01,400
feel the pain like like even a y'all look it should just breaks completely

1848
01:32:01,400 --> 01:32:05,280
something punches him and his shit just fucking cracks it was gonna be so much

1849
01:32:05,280 --> 01:32:17,160
more to the fucking killed it next one is by ring jacket R&J CKT

1850
01:32:17,160 --> 01:32:22,840
they just put a whole bunch of fucking cons in this together and there you go

1851
01:32:22,840 --> 01:32:31,200
this person puts so I 21 and bisexual that's a male it was spring break and I

1852
01:32:31,200 --> 01:32:36,120
was staying with my parents place but as with many things my horny ass had gotten

1853
01:32:36,120 --> 01:32:39,880
the better of me I didn't wait until I left my parents so I was unfathomably

1854
01:32:39,880 --> 01:32:44,720
horny that I needed to have sex this week eventually I found a grinder a

1855
01:32:44,720 --> 01:32:49,440
grinder hookup I snuck out we met up the difference the person wanted to pay me

1856
01:32:49,440 --> 01:32:56,960
for the sex oh okay I said I was like hell yeah how much you paying never

1857
01:32:56,960 --> 01:33:02,320
expecting expected money but he wanted to pay me so I obliged what horrific acts

1858
01:33:02,320 --> 01:33:06,160
you want to commit certain to right after we did the deed he wrote the cat

1859
01:33:06,160 --> 01:33:11,920
he wrote and cashed a check but for some unknown fucking reason he wrote it for

1860
01:33:11,920 --> 01:33:17,320
way more than what he wanted to pay he said it's okay just transfer it back to

1861
01:33:17,320 --> 01:33:22,440
me the problem the one thing I use the account for his food and bus fares the

1862
01:33:22,440 --> 01:33:25,600
moment I tried to send anything more than a couple hundred dollars per day it

1863
01:33:25,600 --> 01:33:29,840
bounces back we went through every finance app to transfer the cash but

1864
01:33:29,840 --> 01:33:33,720
still couldn't give what he wanted back to him because it exceeded my daily

1865
01:33:33,720 --> 01:33:38,040
withdrawal limit I have to call my bank and do multiple withdrawals over

1866
01:33:38,040 --> 01:33:42,960
multiple days but he is threatening me with my personal info my email my number

1867
01:33:42,960 --> 01:33:46,680
the license plate I had used my brother's car because it was the only car

1868
01:33:46,680 --> 01:33:50,880
outside of the garage fuck my life getting my parents involved legal

1869
01:33:50,880 --> 01:33:57,160
threats because it was you know let's see legal threats I normally very cut

1870
01:33:57,160 --> 01:34:01,760
and dry with anything sexual I've never done a hookup before all of this is

1871
01:34:01,760 --> 01:34:07,060
coming crashing down because I was horny and gave too much money to given he

1872
01:34:07,060 --> 01:34:11,760
gave me too much money wait first of all don't you fucking yes sir yeah look you

1873
01:34:11,760 --> 01:34:14,520
fucking third me I'll go to the police and say you hired me as a hooker for

1874
01:34:14,520 --> 01:34:20,520
one don't you dare threaten me try as a cry for help advice I'm stressing the

1875
01:34:20,520 --> 01:34:26,120
the fuck out so edit this person puts thank you for all the comments saying

1876
01:34:26,120 --> 01:34:29,760
it's a scam you really miss the red flags whenever your mind is racing a

1877
01:34:29,760 --> 01:34:33,160
hundred miles per hour I will call my bank and hopefully get the money I sent

1878
01:34:33,160 --> 01:34:37,800
and get confirmation that his checks will bounce I'm still stressed that he

1879
01:34:37,800 --> 01:34:42,360
is some of he has some of my personal info I don't know what will come of it

1880
01:34:42,360 --> 01:34:46,320
but I will make updates it is he you he's got that video him blowing him off

1881
01:34:46,320 --> 01:34:51,080
so exactly it doesn't help either no edit to thank you for the amazing

1882
01:34:51,080 --> 01:34:54,800
comments and insightful advice every commenter has given to me regarding my

1883
01:34:54,800 --> 01:34:59,000
stupidity it's really inspiring seeing a large community address the needs of

1884
01:34:59,000 --> 01:35:03,200
someone in need of in need for the respect of compassion crazy under a

1885
01:35:03,200 --> 01:35:07,880
lawyer to address the immediate recommended actions given I've already

1886
01:35:07,880 --> 01:35:11,920
filed a police report for my area I can only hope the situation resolves

1887
01:35:11,920 --> 01:35:16,080
quickly I've contacted my bank and have disabled all bank accounts and finance

1888
01:35:16,080 --> 01:35:20,640
apps app accounts involved in my fuckup and currently transferring my remaining

1889
01:35:20,640 --> 01:35:25,720
money to new ones the situation for getting refunds for the money I lost is

1890
01:35:25,720 --> 01:35:30,680
in development I've contacted my medical care regarding potential diseases and

1891
01:35:30,680 --> 01:35:34,600
will be receiving medication in my test appointment dates this week he do you

1892
01:35:34,600 --> 01:35:39,640
have a narrow disease too oh my god and this boss would be cross-busted to our

1893
01:35:39,640 --> 01:35:46,280
scales good lord go for a thick companies and try to scam you yeah that's

1894
01:35:46,280 --> 01:35:51,040
pretty weird it's a weird set up yeah it makes me sound like it makes it sound

1895
01:35:51,040 --> 01:35:59,440
like it's a whole guy you are camera eating has my money please god no and

1896
01:35:59,440 --> 01:36:04,880
I'm gonna send it I'd be like do that's the one benefit if you were porn star

1897
01:36:04,880 --> 01:36:08,920
you would not give off I'm gonna send you I'm gonna send all these nude

1898
01:36:08,920 --> 01:36:11,640
pictures you love as opposed to the other thousand that are already on the

1899
01:36:11,640 --> 01:36:19,200
internet all righty next one if I become an a-list celebrity the first thing you'll

1900
01:36:19,200 --> 01:36:23,880
see is my dick so you can't threaten me now cuz everybody's everyone's seen it

1901
01:36:23,880 --> 01:36:30,120
ever seen my booty hole too oh they've seen everything no I would not give a

1902
01:36:30,120 --> 01:36:33,720
fuck after that be like I'd be the one guy if the sex tip got leaked I'd be

1903
01:36:33,720 --> 01:36:38,360
like oh damn that's the wrong angle be like jackass

1904
01:36:38,360 --> 01:36:43,440
basically like they've been but I've taken everything yeah they don't care

1905
01:36:43,440 --> 01:36:47,840
no more no one dude really loves to whip out his big audience Pawnee's yeah

1906
01:36:47,840 --> 01:36:55,080
little too much all right next one it says today I discovered a strange lump

1907
01:36:55,080 --> 01:37:01,300
perched on my asshole despite having never had one I straight away I per

1908
01:37:01,300 --> 01:37:08,440
right on his asshole perched he had a little bit perched despite never had one

1909
01:37:08,440 --> 01:37:13,320
I knew straight away that it was a hemorrhoid it took even less time to

1910
01:37:13,320 --> 01:37:16,040
piece together the chain of events that caused this to happen in the first

1911
01:37:16,040 --> 01:37:20,480
place let me take you back to just under a week ago I woke up and my morning

1912
01:37:20,480 --> 01:37:24,240
coffee with some breakfast and shortly after felt my bowels moving in a way

1913
01:37:24,240 --> 01:37:29,400
that would suggest that I was about to have a glorious shit as it often as is

1914
01:37:29,400 --> 01:37:36,800
often the case I eat a lot of we'd a Bix never heard of that cereal nope or no

1915
01:37:36,800 --> 01:37:40,160
whatever the hell it is I'm assuming this is serious it sounds like weed

1916
01:37:40,160 --> 01:37:44,600
thins or something right I made my way to the toilet sat down and got myself

1917
01:37:44,600 --> 01:37:50,120
comfortable now my booty hole exploded now I'd like to preface this by saying

1918
01:37:50,120 --> 01:37:54,560
that for 26 whole years I have never needed to sneeze whilst taking a shit

1919
01:37:54,560 --> 01:38:00,560
not once this day was different however as before I'd even started crowning my

1920
01:38:00,560 --> 01:38:05,080
nose started twinge thinking nothing of it allowed myself to sneeze not knowing

1921
01:38:05,080 --> 01:38:10,040
the dire consequences that would follow I sneezed hard the sudden spasm caused my

1922
01:38:10,040 --> 01:38:14,160
entire body to tense up Jim generating so much torque that the whole shit I

1923
01:38:14,160 --> 01:38:17,680
had been brewing fired out of my hole with the force of a 50 caliber round

1924
01:38:17,680 --> 01:38:22,800
hi-dash it must have hurt that shit must have literally hurt a burning sirian

1925
01:38:22,800 --> 01:38:28,400
sensation followed shortly after a pain which would be ingrained into my memory

1926
01:38:28,400 --> 01:38:32,400
and one that I'm sure will live with me for many years to come

1927
01:38:32,400 --> 01:38:40,040
now so he gave himself a hemorrhoid to that sucks yeah now this one this is an

1928
01:38:40,040 --> 01:38:42,920
update to one that we had last week we have an update to something we've

1929
01:38:42,920 --> 01:38:47,240
actually done before yes this is the one about the guy like my my stories at the

1930
01:38:47,240 --> 01:38:52,280
supermarket this is an update yes this is the update to the guy that was banging

1931
01:38:52,280 --> 01:39:00,560
his former boss and her husband shit I forgot about him the sadness involved the

1932
01:39:00,560 --> 01:39:08,080
absolute true fucking what's the word did that just embarrassment yes so

1933
01:39:08,080 --> 01:39:12,360
palpable that he gave us secondhand embarrassment yes yes such a degree we

1934
01:39:12,360 --> 01:39:16,720
thought we were in the room too yes so the original too long didn't read is

1935
01:39:16,720 --> 01:39:21,400
that he agreed to sleep with his ex-boss while her husband watched him but the

1936
01:39:21,400 --> 01:39:25,920
husband fell asleep mid sex too much yeah we could made her mad we're gonna

1937
01:39:25,920 --> 01:39:30,320
argue while he's still pumping away with where he went home with instant regret

1938
01:39:30,320 --> 01:39:35,280
right this is the update it's long as fuck so you might want to skip to the

1939
01:39:35,280 --> 01:39:39,520
new TLDR below but we're not gonna do that we're gonna go through the whole

1940
01:39:39,520 --> 01:39:46,000
story okey-dokey so there I was face to face with my former boss boss and her

1941
01:39:46,000 --> 01:39:50,800
flatulent husband once again oh god I agreed to the meet to meet them at the

1942
01:39:50,800 --> 01:39:54,560
same restaurant as the last time because the free food was the only good thing I

1943
01:39:54,560 --> 01:39:58,400
remembered the purpose of the meeting according to my former boss was to clear

1944
01:39:58,400 --> 01:40:02,800
the air following what happened a phone call or a message or no communication at

1945
01:40:02,800 --> 01:40:05,760
all would have been more than acceptable for me because I wanted to

1946
01:40:05,760 --> 01:40:10,600
move on but my ex-boss insisted restoring peace in person I eventually

1947
01:40:10,600 --> 01:40:14,600
said yes the husband was in the men's room whenever I showed up for the

1948
01:40:14,600 --> 01:40:19,160
meeting which made me laugh a little on the inside because it seemed like an

1949
01:40:19,160 --> 01:40:22,920
unintentional nod to how active his ass was during our previous interaction

1950
01:40:22,920 --> 01:40:27,560
you know a flatulent is fun my ex-boss thanked me for agreeing to meet with her

1951
01:40:27,560 --> 01:40:32,200
and said her husband would join us soon meanwhile she apologized for how

1952
01:40:32,200 --> 01:40:36,240
unfortunate things turned out whenever we had sex before telling me that she

1953
01:40:36,240 --> 01:40:39,720
had been brainstorming ways to improve the experience for next time you know

1954
01:40:39,720 --> 01:40:48,320
next time ma'am please and when do men learn their lesson we never do the

1955
01:40:48,320 --> 01:40:51,480
husband emerged from the men's room at that moment and greeted me with the

1956
01:40:51,480 --> 01:40:57,760
awkward fist bump hey bro how that busy fear and an unspoken hello again well

1957
01:40:57,760 --> 01:41:01,040
his wife was trying to convince me to accept another invitation into their

1958
01:41:01,040 --> 01:41:06,160
bedroom she persuaded me to at least hear her out before I said yes or no her

1959
01:41:06,160 --> 01:41:10,000
plan was to pivot her approached in the bedroom and embraced a dominant position

1960
01:41:10,000 --> 01:41:13,160
during sex because she believes her husband would be less likely to fall

1961
01:41:13,160 --> 01:41:20,440
asleep again he was watching her put on a show and take control my ex-boss he

1962
01:41:20,440 --> 01:41:25,480
paused at that point and looked at her husband like that was his cue to swallow

1963
01:41:25,480 --> 01:41:30,200
his sushi and add to what she was saying the husband pointed his chopsticks at me

1964
01:41:30,200 --> 01:41:37,520
and said he was expecting more energy from a young guy fuck him what kind of

1965
01:41:37,520 --> 01:41:47,280
Twilight Zone are we living in where was then but based on what he observed

1966
01:41:47,280 --> 01:41:51,120
while he was still awake I was fucking his wife the same way he fucked his

1967
01:41:51,120 --> 01:41:57,400
wife whenever he's more in the mood to masturbate Jesus he's so bad and say

1968
01:41:57,400 --> 01:42:02,360
yeah they both sides are terrible at it I said having sex with another man's

1969
01:42:02,360 --> 01:42:06,440
wife while the man is in the room was like trying to poop comfortably while a

1970
01:42:06,440 --> 01:42:10,720
random person was watching they just could kick the door and you chew shit

1971
01:42:10,720 --> 01:42:16,400
the husband asked me if I made moaning noises whenever I pooped

1972
01:42:16,400 --> 01:42:23,360
because he's making money noise cut the damn shot I said my bones big poops was

1973
01:42:23,360 --> 01:42:27,760
dependent on how hard it was to push and clog my coat it depends man if you're

1974
01:42:27,760 --> 01:42:35,080
like a good you're like a really good shit like good shit the husband said I

1975
01:42:35,080 --> 01:42:38,600
might need to start pretending that I'm pushing as hard as possible whenever I

1976
01:42:38,600 --> 01:42:41,560
sleep with someone because I never made a sound whenever I was intimate with his

1977
01:42:41,560 --> 01:42:47,480
wife which which contributed to his struggle to stay awake I said pretending

1978
01:42:47,480 --> 01:42:51,080
to poop during sex with some sound advice coming from a guy who was unable

1979
01:42:51,080 --> 01:42:57,200
to stop farting while I was fucked I got two points I want to say I just

1980
01:42:57,200 --> 01:43:01,520
realized something okay you don't really think about it in the moment but now now

1981
01:43:01,520 --> 01:43:07,480
with the retrospection I just realized how like okay so two points porn and

1982
01:43:07,480 --> 01:43:11,080
murders I know they don't make sense right now but but they will I promise you

1983
01:43:11,080 --> 01:43:16,960
this is how my brain works so imagine you you posted a video online of your

1984
01:43:16,960 --> 01:43:22,480
enamorous endeavors right and you're like oh this is the best sex I've ever

1985
01:43:22,480 --> 01:43:25,840
had right and then you you don't realize how many people just skip past it like

1986
01:43:25,840 --> 01:43:29,240
it's nothing right you're right like you like the little number of the number one

1987
01:43:29,240 --> 01:43:34,640
through a hundred or some shit of videos yeah like skip skip yeah and like I'm

1988
01:43:34,640 --> 01:43:38,080
like that I was just how heartbreaking that would be that you're you look so

1989
01:43:38,080 --> 01:43:42,320
lame in the video they just skip you over skip skip and two is the one with

1990
01:43:42,320 --> 01:43:46,440
the murders like you imagine you're so you're such a boring person that they

1991
01:43:46,440 --> 01:43:53,600
skip over your murder mystery on a fucking TV show yeah I was like that it

1992
01:43:53,600 --> 01:43:56,440
would be like so basically this old guy saying like you can't like that's how

1993
01:43:56,440 --> 01:44:00,840
boring he was it was a skip video yes we've all had skip videos in porn some

1994
01:44:00,840 --> 01:44:06,920
are just horrible horrible right now I am in a what a fucking shock now out of

1995
01:44:06,920 --> 01:44:12,920
the courtesy I would have to watch shit videos even if I don't like them you

1996
01:44:12,920 --> 01:44:18,200
got yourself into something damn it I hate my brain so my ex-boss pushed her

1997
01:44:18,200 --> 01:44:22,320
plate away and said she had lost her appetite listening to us I said are you

1998
01:44:22,320 --> 01:44:26,160
living in a fucking movie what they pushed her plate away like I can't do

1999
01:44:26,160 --> 01:44:30,640
this today did you fucking throw her napkin on top of the plate like they do

2000
01:44:30,640 --> 01:44:35,640
in the movies I said I didn't think I was sexually compatible with my ex-boss

2001
01:44:35,640 --> 01:44:40,160
and her husband and suggested that they get another guy for the job what I

2002
01:44:40,160 --> 01:44:44,960
think yeah my ex-boss pointed out that the two of us were very sexually

2003
01:44:44,960 --> 01:44:50,120
compatible with when we were when we had our one night stand prior to her meeting

2004
01:44:50,120 --> 01:44:54,200
her husband I said I wouldn't call that sexually compatible since she was my

2005
01:44:54,200 --> 01:44:58,280
boss back then and both of us were drunk the husband said now he lost his

2006
01:44:58,280 --> 01:45:04,760
appetite too that's a hard thing to do for that big fat mother I said I had

2007
01:45:04,760 --> 01:45:07,880
someone in mind that might be perfect for what they want the husband

2008
01:45:07,880 --> 01:45:11,960
sarcastically asked if it's another young employee his wife hooked up with I

2009
01:45:11,960 --> 01:45:17,560
said it was one of my more sexually experienced friends my ex-boss said if

2010
01:45:17,560 --> 01:45:22,040
it's not that me then it's no one the husband encouraged his wife to at least

2011
01:45:22,040 --> 01:45:25,280
allow me to provide more information about my friend before instantly

2012
01:45:25,280 --> 01:45:29,240
calling off the whole thing the information I provided prompted my ex-

2013
01:45:29,240 --> 01:45:33,240
boss and her husband to agree to meet my friend I contacted my friend the

2014
01:45:33,240 --> 01:45:36,640
following day and explained the situation he became interested as soon

2015
01:45:36,640 --> 01:45:41,880
as I showed him photos of her I shared his contact details with her with his

2016
01:45:41,880 --> 01:45:46,640
permission and thought that would be to the end of my involvement in the circuit

2017
01:45:46,640 --> 01:45:52,680
how do I leave this situation little did I know that my friend would call me a

2018
01:45:52,680 --> 01:45:57,280
few days later to ask me why the fuck I never warned him that the husband had a

2019
01:45:57,280 --> 01:46:03,840
pit bull I said I didn't know my friend said that he had to fuck my ex-boss in

2020
01:46:03,840 --> 01:46:08,800
front of the husband and his hell hound that's weird why did white pick why the

2021
01:46:08,800 --> 01:46:16,440
dog love us better fucker or at least the dog I asked my friend if the pit

2022
01:46:16,440 --> 01:46:19,720
bull did anything to hurt him he said the dog barked from time to time and the

2023
01:46:19,720 --> 01:46:24,200
husband would tell the it either to shush the dog or translate and tell my

2024
01:46:24,200 --> 01:46:30,480
friend that the dog wanted him to do or not do during sex I was at a loss for

2025
01:46:30,480 --> 01:46:36,320
words I'm starting to think that I'm starting to think that the couple this is

2026
01:46:36,320 --> 01:46:39,920
their little role-playing bullshit game they're doing yeah I did do this on

2027
01:46:39,920 --> 01:46:43,480
purpose I think it is awkward as possible I'm not because they get off on

2028
01:46:43,480 --> 01:46:47,220
all these evil motherfuckers I was at a loss for words my friend said the

2029
01:46:47,220 --> 01:46:51,240
husband slapped his butt whenever he finished he called him a good boy it

2030
01:46:51,240 --> 01:46:55,760
sounded so ridiculous but I was struggling not to laugh however I did

2031
01:46:55,760 --> 01:46:59,320
feel bad for my friend because I could relate my friend said he wouldn't it

2032
01:46:59,320 --> 01:47:01,800
would have punched the husband if the pit bull was not in the picture I

2033
01:47:01,800 --> 01:47:06,560
apologize for introducing him to my ex boss and her husband my friend thanked me

2034
01:47:06,560 --> 01:47:11,080
for the trauma and said bye bro thanks for ruining my fucking life thanks blah

2035
01:47:11,080 --> 01:47:16,640
I decided to do what I should have done after my last post and blocked I killed

2036
01:47:16,640 --> 01:47:22,080
both of them and blocked my ex boss she's crazy but I think she somehow

2037
01:47:22,080 --> 01:47:26,080
married someone even crazier it sounds like it I'm still working on a way to

2038
01:47:26,080 --> 01:47:31,080
make my friend like me again you can fuck him I guess you can slap him on the

2039
01:47:31,080 --> 01:47:36,520
other told him a good boy seems to fix everything and that's all I've got for

2040
01:47:36,520 --> 01:47:44,680
a fix today I just thought that you'd like the update yeah no I don't know I

2041
01:47:44,680 --> 01:47:48,280
think they do enjoy it though I think they do I think they do that shit on

2042
01:47:48,280 --> 01:47:51,720
purpose I'd like the awkwardness yeah the thing they get off on it and when the

2043
01:47:51,720 --> 01:47:56,920
guy leaves they just fucking go hell hound on each other clearly say they

2044
01:47:56,920 --> 01:48:01,400
haven't in twice is one once is one thing twice is another just her push in

2045
01:48:01,400 --> 01:48:07,480
her flight away I'm also his plate is empty I'm also don't have an appetite

2046
01:48:07,480 --> 01:48:27,600
anymore I also lost my appetite is like a throws a plate on the floor anything

2047
01:48:27,600 --> 01:48:30,480
else had before we head out I just realized how I'll go to this to lick a

2048
01:48:30,480 --> 01:48:35,400
plate but you know it the nasty like I've done it once as a kid is a head and

2049
01:48:35,400 --> 01:48:40,280
it now doesn't adore it looks like the saddest shit you could get the rest of

2050
01:48:40,280 --> 01:48:49,080
this fucking piece of pizza all right well with that we will see you guys on

2051
01:48:49,080 --> 01:49:06,080
the next part three my third friend that I'm really