Hello and welcome back to Reddit Insanity.
We're at number 19.
We're insane.
We are.
I'm insane a long time ago, so we're fine.
Everybody goes mad, a little mad sometimes.
It's cool.
If you ever seen the movie Psycho all the way back in 1960 or whatever.
Yeah, everyone was a little mad sometimes.
Like a murder.
It's in the fucking shower.
That was his little little going mad.
Just a little.
So what's major?
A little murder.
All right.
Well, now you could be in these people's situations.
So the first two of these stories relate to the third.
I'm in peck of what?
That caught my interest there.
Like 100 percent, like, wait a minute, a callback.
You picked my interest.
Yeah.
OK, so the first one is posted by Stiggy Bomb.
I know this person puts a today I fucked up, woke up this morning and opened Reddit as
usual and read the first today.
I fucked up.
That shows up on my feed.
I usually sit there.
How do you read so that fuck your day up?
Did it involve him?
No, but.
You'll see.
OK.
I usually sit here nice and early, enjoy my coffee with a mix of news, memes and random
subs to follow.
Not today.
I sit down to read this post and now I'm having trouble thinking about anything my lips may
touch.
I want to burn my phone, go back to bed and wake up tomorrow with my brain erased.
I've been here for so many years and I think this may be one of those posts that goes down
as I remember where I was when I read that post.
I was here when that happened.
Oh man.
Second one.
Oh, now I see what you mean.
This thing must be a fucking nightmare.
Scary nightmare, but not the worst I've ever seen on Reddit, which is sad to say.
Jesus.
Second one is by PM me your hip dimples.
I'm surprised someone hasn't said like I thought it'd be funny to fart in my cousin's face
shit in his mouth.
So the story makes sure you get to dry shit or a dry fucking fart on a wet one.
They never trust a fart ever.
Yeah, never.
That's what I just said.
Never trust the fart.
So this person puts this literally just happened.
Here I am a typical Sunday morning rolling around in bed in lieu of actually sleeping
or actually getting up.
I was doing that.
I scroll the front page, random boxing, Victor titties, uh, bomb tracking, correction pigeons,
Caitlyn Jenner somehow running on a conservative platform for California governor.
You know, the usual.
Then I see this today.
I fucked up about, uh, sucking some dick.
So of course, so wrong with that being a fan of forbidden takes.
I clicked.
You can turn the link purple if you'd like, but I'd caution against it.
I went from being groggy to sitting up with the posture of a Catholic school dunce during
yards yardstick Mondays.
My eyes are clear, hardest thumping, but not an excitement.
Nay more in a sense of fight or flight as I have a desire to punch my phone and run
for the Luddick hermitage.
What the fuck did this other person do?
People make it sound out to be, but it's still bad.
Like being thrown into a naughty ass to mouth tail and then taking an extremely hard left
explained everything.
Not all of it, but they can be extremely hard left into a disgusting detail.
It's not only unfair, but I would argue that I did not fully consent to it.
It's like saying you're down for second base playing, getting spit roasted.
I spit right.
That of all things.
I feel traumatized like a fever dream of my 10 year old curiosity.
Hoping my stepdad wouldn't notice me tearing a single page from June's playboy mixed with
that one time where I threw up down between my thighs into a toilet and was shitting my
brains out.
God dang bro, you must have been sick sick.
This is beyond the swamps of Daggerball or two broken arms.
The swamps of Daggerball sir.
That place was a fucking swamp ass is there wherever there was one.
Anyway, he's back to scrolling.
I get Jesus.
Well, what do you do?
Like this person went ass to mouth, sucked him off, then then forgot to brush your teeth
and what?
Kissed your grandma.
What's so bad?
Well, here's the story.
Okay, here we go.
This is by who's who hasn't shaken someone's hand after you jerked off.
I should be shaking right now.
I'm so sorry.
I'm sorry.
It's clammy.
Yeah, I'm so sorry.
I should have washed my hand.
Damn it.
This is posted by what?
Like the South Park thing.
Oh, yeah.
This is a bar floskey.
Yeah, she does.
Yeah.
Yeah, it's basically the same thing.
So this person puts throw away for obvious reasons.
This literally just happened.
I can't tell anyone in real life.
So I have to share this somewhere.
So I'm in real life.
So it's a standard Saturday night, a few drinks hanging out with my boyfriend and I decided
to move things on.
We get to having sex and move on to anal without preparing.
It's a fantasy of his that you always prepare that I lick his D afterwards, which I don't
have an issue with.
I've done before when we're in the mood.
So I gave it one long lick when done.
It feels something like a hair in my mouth.
Pulling it out of my finger.
Turns out it was a worm.
A fucking worm.
Oh, she has worms.
Really worth mentioning that I work with kids, so this is a thing I have to deal with semi-regularly.
Kids get worms all the time.
This is the grossest thing that's ever happened to me.
Wait, what the fuck does that have to do with her?
Came out of her ass.
Yeah, I understand.
What does that have to do with kids?
Because apparently kids get worms.
Why did she even mention that for?
Makes it look like she was 10 years old.
Kids get worms all the time.
I bet you.
I think she might be a teacher.
I know, I got that part, but it's just, there was just a weird reference that it just.
So imagine fucking a girl.
I've done that before.
And you get a worm on it.
Hmm.
What if it started going up somewhere?
Hold not.
Man, that's gross.
And this happens regularly.
To her or to kids?
Both apparently.
She said so as she deals with it on a semi-regularly, a semi-regularly.
Then no anal, lady.
I mean, I'm sorry, but until that you get that shit cleaned up permanently.
That asshole is an egg.
This is what worried those first two people.
I'm not like, I guess, you know, I'm not like fucking devastated.
Not devastated, but is that something you wanted to hear for?
Like if you woke up, read that story as your first story in the morning.
I just been like, ah, gross.
And then just fucking went on with my day.
And apparently it was long.
They're fucking weak willed.
Long, huh?
Bam.
Imagine it's longer than years.
So you son of a bitch, I got a parasite all over you.
I have fucking released boughs of ungodly death.
I've never had a worm.
No.
What the fuck does she she eating?
I don't know.
We'll go drink some water.
Eat some apples.
Apparently she's getting tapeworms.
Oh, gross.
I thought table coming out of a bear's ass once on Twitter.
It's always Twitter.
The question is the animal of the animal on Twitter can be.
Oh, yeah, I guess I'm sure they like because they eat uncooked raw fish all the time.
Yeah, they just have tapeworms like fucking like 18 feet long.
And that's why they say you shouldn't eat bear meat.
But it's so delicious.
Some of them have cocaine in it.
All right.
Going past that now, ones that are not associated with that.
How fucking stoic are we that we're like, I know, isn't that sad?
I know the listeners.
So it's like, oh, I've cleaned up baby care vomit.
I'll be fine.
Next one is by Palm Queen.
I'm Queen.
What did she just give it a hand job?
So this person puts so today I'm on the train and my 37 year old empty wound self sad, a
single self sad opposite a dad with his kid.
That was cute.
Child was cuter.
You we'd like to pedophile immediately tackle for no reason.
You can't even do that anymore.
Hey, cute kid.
What the fuck?
You mean cute kid?
Exactly.
I mean, I'm a super platonic way.
Your honor.
It cuts to that.
Oh, your honor.
Well, you've seen that Bill Burr thing, haven't you?
Where he says, no doesn't always mean no.
But he's like, you know, you're with your girl and it's like, she's like, no, no, stop
it.
No, no.
You go into court and you get a bad read.
Yeah, no, no.
I said, stop it.
Your honor.
Come on.
I don't like that.
Yeah, I guess.
Yeah.
You get a bad read.
I remember that scared.
Wait a minute.
So this person puts anyway, we chatted a bit and I gave him my number written on my business
card with a little message.
Who the kid of them did that?
She doesn't say nasty.
He took it from me and put it in his bag.
It was a kid.
Got the fucking backpack.
You evil bitch.
I was then like, read it.
He said, thanks.
I will.
I'll read it to him.
He avoided when I learned to read when I had school today already.
I'll read it to the teacher.
She's probably a freak too.
Teachers nowadays.
Not when I was growing up.
Well, the man, those nasty fucks, the whole, the teachers that we had weren't, I'll come
out.
How do I say this to be nine?
What about in eighth grade?
There was one that was okay.
She used to stress so hot.
But then all the girls told her all the guys talked about her so she stopped dressing like
a nun.
Yeah.
But she also had that nose.
Who cares, man?
Those imperfections make her perfect.
It's sad that I remember what you're talking about.
You remember.
Go ahead.
Go into your George Lopez stand up.
You remember.
I was more like the South Park member berries.
I was a member berry.
Yeah.
I was.
She went straight to the fuck man.
Hey man.
The member member.
But then he avoided eye contact as he got off the train.
Now he, now if he doesn't message, I might feel worse.
I was brought up.
It was brought up a lot of questions for me.
Did I come off as weird and interrogate him?
Yeah, you were.
Am I fat and ugly?
I'll never have kids, et cetera.
So much regret.
See, now I know she's trying to get that kid.
She'll never have kids.
Oh, what are you trying to say?
You can really word anything bad and not even be intentional about it.
Now imagine if you try.
Oh, your honor.
Next one is by quicksnotboring.
Quicksnotboring.
So this person puts quite funny now that I look back on it.
Can I say something by the way?
You said quicks and it reminded me of like super spade, which remind me of quick silver,
which remind me of the flash and the flash is good out of theaters here pretty soon.
You know what made less money than the original green lantern with this?
I was like, imagine.
Think about that.
That's also with cameos by Michael Keaton, by George Clooney, by fucking Ben Affleck,
Gal Gadot.
Like everybody was in it and it still had my gut.
You know what?
That gives me hope for the world because it means that people didn't want to go see Ezra
Miller.
But I wanted to see that body with that stop slide.
We still need to go see it.
Well, too late.
My job's fucking permanent.
All right.
So this person puts quite funny now that I look back on it, but it was quite stressful
whenever it was happening.
I'm American born and raised.
About a year ago, I got hired at a local retail store and when I got bored, I would talk to
customers in a British accent as a joke to make my job more exciting.
Hello mate.
And I came into a British accent.
Hello mate.
No harm, no foul.
My employer employer actually founded entertaining as well.
Months passed and I ended up taking a new job at a fast food place where you order for
the drive through.
It is taken outside by actual employees.
Yes.
Chick-fil-A. The management is much stricter and have been food service.
It isn't much fun.
I decided to once again start using a British accent for fun in the drive through lanes.
It works so well that some people ask where I'm from and one customer even makes the remark.
Ah, I get it.
England and Australia confused.
Needless to say, it's fucking hilarious.
Anyway, today I was doing my usual British act and the iPad to take orders stopped connecting
to the card swiper.
So I radioed for a new card swiper.
Back turned to the customer to not reveal my real voice.
At Chick-fil-A.
How do you turn your back?
You just sound, you know.
People are stupid though.
Is that somebody else talking?
At Chick-fil-A, if your card swiper isn't working, you can still take orders and you
can tell them to pay at the window.
So I take this dude's order and as I begin instructing him to pull out to the window,
my manager comes out with a new one and stands right next to me.
I have two options.
Continue my British act as I talk to the customer and hope my manager doesn't notice or care
or switch to my regular American voice.
I'm not very good at split decisions and continue using my British accent while looking at my
manager out of the corner of my eye.
Flash forward to the end of my shift and he's telling me to.
He's telling me to clock out.
He says I need to make sure I'm speaking clearly in the drive through next time and that my
actions today were unprofessional and mockery.
Oh, come on, sir.
Please.
I check.
Well, he didn't.
He didn't.
Now I'm just hoping he doesn't fire me because I'm not going to stop anytime soon.
Come on now.
That's why some people just want to run the joy out of your life.
Sometimes.
Yeah.
But have you seen how happy they are at Chick-fil-A?
They're actually pretty fucking happy.
I mean, that person is like that's not stereotypical.
Chick-fil-A. Hmm.
Not the worker for the manager.
I've never been to Chick-fil-A. Really?
Yeah.
They're the kind where it's like such good customer service over and after your car with
a fucking packet of ketchup.
If you forgot it.
Hmm.
You forgot it, sir.
And it's always my pleasure.
I'm allergic to ketchup.
I'm sorry, sir.
If I can perform Harry Care.
The fucking Japanese suicide.
Like, oh, damn it.
Shit is painful.
I from what I hear.
God would assume so.
You're disemboweling yourself.
Yeah.
I just mean like, I like to me, like you, you stab in, right?
And like you move a little bit and you just die instantly.
But no, it's inside of.
You're just like fuck.
I'm still alive.
The next one is by ADHD as fuck.
That sounds like my life.
Yeah.
This person puts, well, I've been doing it all week.
I had read somewhere.
It was a hack to deal with low sodium electrolyte imbalances without paying a lot of money.
It only solves.
Is it a sharp little sugar cube of your asshole?
It's a cube of sugar.
So what does sugar have to do with sodium?
I don't know.
Look at eight or nine sugar cubes of your asshole later.
So you got diabetes.
I thought this was the cure.
It only covers sodium, but as someone that sweats out a lot of salt and it constantly
lightheaded, I was, it was like, that sounds great.
It's like a great hack.
Pop a bullion cube after gym sounds so easy.
It turns out I was worse than the tape.
I'm fucking full.
You're back.
That shit would be powerful.
The flavor.
So that turns out I really liked the salty bullion cubes.
I started just popping them in my mouth a few, a few a day.
God.
I'm sure because my sodium is often low that it was delicious.
Okay.
The hell of a drive.
It's really salty little snack.
You know what?
You know what I did once?
You know, like that, like that real cocoa, like Netflix and not the chocolate mix.
Yeah.
Like the actual cocoa.
Yeah.
I was like, Ooh, delicious.
I thought in the fucking kitchen cabinet once, right?
I'm like, the fucking better.
I was so mad.
Chocolatey flavor.
It all fucking dirt would have tasted better.
Then you would have gotten one of the worms.
I never would have.
I never forgot that.
I was like, Hey, what the?
Have you ever tried baking chocolate?
No.
Oh, bitter.
What is this chocolate?
I'm so mad.
All the peppers could say that.
Yes.
Now you know my secret.
We're going to get a spoon to this cocoa.
All right.
So they put their chicken bullying cubes.
And I think the umami flavor adds that little extra to go from discussing levels of salt
to downright.
Yum.
Oh, so it must've been super salty.
Yeah.
Oh, I can't handle super salty stuff.
Imagine like those, uh, those ramen noodle packs, those dried ones.
Just concentrated.
Yeah.
But I also have had worsening GI upset all week.
I'm blind now.
I thought it was something I ate.
I had some fucking bullying back in the fuck.
I had some, uh, some questionable takeout one night.
The kind of pizza that sits under a heat lamp too long.
Then as the issue persisted, I thought I had a virus as I had made multiple runs to the
bathroom.
It wasn't quite diarrhea, but it was pretty close.
That shit look like soup.
You know, whenever you really have to go and you just start to perspire.
Yeah.
I had that one time.
That shit is brutal.
Oh, I got a shit.
It's coming out one way or the other.
Either do my pores or do my asshole.
You know, your body screaming bathroom now.
Yes.
That kept happening until today when I thought I was going to black out with how strong the
urge was.
Oh my God.
Down to the dash to the bathroom.
And now there's an unnaturally vivid gold color in my very loose stools, which I hadn't
need anything at all.
That was yellow.
Oh no.
The chicken bullying.
Oh yeah.
There you go.
Sherlock.
And that is how I learned that I learned about osmotic diarrhea.
Osmotic.
It takes water out of your body because of the salt content.
So he's just shit and water.
The golden changed water.
Wow.
That's wild.
So don't eat chicken bullying cubes.
You can eat them.
Just, you know, an actual fucking.
So whenever he said that he shouldn't have been eating them, my first thought was, what
do you have a fucking heart attack from all this?
Yeah.
I'm like, you fucking die.
It's like, yeah, I was eating them chicken bullying cues, had a couple of cardiac bypasses.
So I had to stop.
I took my foot.
They said I had to beat us from it.
I don't know what they got to beat us from.
It'll solve.
You got reverse beat us.
You got less shit and no mention in history.
You got top five diabetes.
It's a diabetes.
Nobody's hurting you, but you got beat us.
Not even diets be not the beat us, but just beat us.
And the last one is by, oh my, I can't even imagine his fucking blood pressure.
It's like he was blacking out, picking shit up.
Hey, I know people's blood pressure can go really high because just for example, my brother
skinny as fuck, blood pressure, 190 to 200.
God dang.
Every day.
Just from the fucking way to his job, probably.
Well, even before that, yeah.
Yeah.
Just a super high blood pressure.
Like for him, if blood pressure goes down to 140, he's about to like, he's got under
blood pressure.
He's got past hypertension and high blood pressure.
Damn.
Just as one of those, those blood pressure monitors like just tops out.
She just fucking dies in her house.
All right.
Last one today is by Tretzu.
This person puts, I don't know if we can talk that boy in one that was going literally gold
shit, gold tier two.
All right.
They put that this was more of a funny outcome, not a horrendously bad one.
I don't know why they spelled horrendously bad, but they put a and a S H at the end of
horrendously.
You can't spell.
I know that.
God dang it.
All right.
So they put even with autocorrect, I've seen some horrendous spellings.
Isn't that sad?
Yeah.
They put I am a male.
Oh, you know what?
I told you like I'm home so we can start recording.
Right?
Yeah.
You know what?
I wanted to say after I'm it, want to say I him, I'm him.
I'm like, really?
If you haven't been typing this is that much.
It's fucking known in the fucking lexicon of this.
God dang.
I'm him.
I'm like, wow.
That whole like I'm that.
I'm like, I'm just that guy.
I'm him.
Like you're not him.
So you're not.
All right.
So they let you know they're a male.
I've seen your dick size.
You're not him.
That's the best way to get mixed up with bad.
So you saw the pitch.
This person puts I posted a listing on Craigslist saying I will do odd jobs for cash.
I got about 11 responses asking male or female.
No hand jobs.
So I learned odd jobs, men's taking it in the ass.
That's an odd job.
OK.
One guy asked me if I was like, there's so fucking to the point.
Yeah.
Well, it is craigslist.
I got time for no fucking little innuendo.
You suck dick.
The person that puts second try this time, I explicitly stated I was looking for labor
jobs, like garden maintenance, moving, et cetera.
The first guy you're going to move this dick in your mouth.
The first guy who replies is the same fucking guy from earlier.
He says, OK, I need to know if you're a guy or a girl.
I didn't know how strong to make this cage.
So here's what I learned.
Three bullet point.
Craigslist is not good for gig work or anything, really.
The main demographic is horny old men.
Yeah.
And three, if you're a woman and you use Craigslist, you're going to disappear real fast.
Yes.
You will not be found again.
It's an odd job.
Me, second, it up.
God dang.
The people are just to the point you said big boy.
They ain't going to sell yourself.
You know what I saw once?
I don't know if it was a skit, if it was like a joke or if it was real.
That was an old guy like on one of those fucking like scooters.
Yeah.
Like the kind of Carmen had that you sit on.
Like he's so bad.
The hover around.
Yeah.
Like it was one of those like little rascals.
Yeah.
Little rascal.
Yeah.
Like this guy came around the corner with his camera.
So we're following the where the guy with the camera basically from his point of view
and he's getting a blowjob from a hooker and the hooker fucking dips, grabs her purse and
the other guy says, and then he fucking like, he was like, he looked like he was like, you
know, like something mentally.
He was like that senile.
Then all of a sudden he just like fucking puts his fucking pants up and he's just fucking
rise up on the rascal.
I'll see you later.
He had to be like 90 is getting like the horny never dies.
I mean, to be fair, I have seen a dude never rush in himself.
So I don't know what that to do with being horny, but I've seen some crazy stuff.
It's like blows the back, the back tires blow out.
Oh, fuck.
I shit.
I've seen the seat bounce back.
Okay, man.
See, there are government paid elderly homes and you see some shit.
It's literally literally.
This is what he did at the lady around the corner.
Oh God.
It's a God day.
It's like son of a bitch.
I'm going to have to help it now.
Speaking about the Craigslist thing, I used to, I watched this series called Broad City
with these two women comedians.
The series is over.
Like it's like it reaches series finale.
I watched the whole season, the whole series on fucking Hulu and the very first episode,
one of them wants to go to the little Wayne concert.
The other one's like, no problem.
I know how to get us some money.
So they go to this guy's house and the girl that took them there tells the other girl,
look, we're going to start taking our clothes off here real quick.
Like basically she's like, and the other one was like, what the fuck you talking about?
She's like, has no idea what that is.
Basically she got hired on Craigslist from this guy to clean his house, but they had
to be in their underwear the whole time.
She's like, well, you know, she had her other friend come with her, you know, two people,
you know, it was safer.
So she's out there like, fuck.
It's like, she's like $200 bro.
Come on.
Like, damn it.
And so they get butt naked, but they get in their underwear.
They clean the whole house, right?
And the guy comes out in a diaper.
He's like, he's like, I don't know.
And they're like, yo, you going to pay us the money now?
And he's like, I'm just a baby.
I don't know.
They were so fucking mad.
He's just walking around in a diaper.
I don't know.
I'm just a little baby.
What the fuck?
You son of a bitch.
I would have been mad as fuck.
Like I just cleaned your whole fucking house and my underwear.
And it was such a fucking perfect way for him to get out of paying.
Like it's so fucking funny.
They like, they trash his whole fucking house.
They take some of his shit.
I don't know.
I'm just a baby.
No money.
He's just like fucking weird baby boy.
I don't know money.
I'm like, what the fuck?
This is the greatest show I've ever seen.
It's so fucking funny.
Good show.
But yeah, the Craigslist, they asked for weird circumstances.
Yeah.
If we ever wanted to go down that rabbit hole, their stories from there is like, oh God.
The funniest one, the funniest thing I've seen from Craigslist.
Well, I wouldn't say funniest, but weirdest is the, it's a page where it's just miss you
or something like that.
Oh yeah.
The one where like I've held connection.
Yeah.
Miss connections.
That's what it is.
Stupid as fucking stories I have ever seen.
Like you were wearing a blue shirt from the back of your head.
From the bushes.
I wasn't sure, but I got a better look.
Who's checking that?
Oh, that was me.
Yeah.
That's what, that's, that's what I never understood.
Like how would someone, like I would understand if it was like they, they met, they talked,
they, they hung out for a few minutes.
Like one of them left and the other one was like, oh fuck, I should have said something
or gave her my phone and all this.
And then you hope that you can connect to on the, but I wouldn't use Facebook, not fucking
Craigslist.
Miss connections.
I can't quit you.
Craigslist sounds shady as fuck.
I know.
Well, it's a dude Craigslist.
It's a list of all his fetish shit.
It's a lot of BCOT.
Man.
Yeah.
That missed connection shit makes no sense on Craigslist.
It just, it has never made any sense to me.
I don't even know if it's ever worked.
Has it?
I, top of my head, I can't think of it ever working.
That would be, I don't know your name.
I don't remember what you look at.
What's really sad though is that they didn't just have it in Craigslist.
It existed in regular papers.
Miss connections.
What are the chances someone will be reading that?
But to be fair in a normal newspaper, there's more of a likelihood of more people reading
it.
A specific, maybe, maybe they're thinking that if someone that they know, they're thinking
that someone that that person knows will sit and then tell that person, Hey, did you meet
a guy at the park and he chased after you and you got away?
He's looking for you on this connection.
Like with a newspaper back in the old days, like, you know, the eighties, nineties, that
make more sense.
But Craigslist, it's like, this is just like random people from all over the country that
don't know.
Oh yeah.
That would be impossible.
Almost like I get where the idea came from.
I guess it would work because in newspapers, it's only like, it's a circulation, right?
But it's within a city, a town or whatever, but like, there's more of it.
Like there's a, a, a, a not no chance of finding somebody.
Still weird, but it's a better chance.
Right.
Like mostly if you live like in a smaller town, like, Oh yeah, I remember him.
That's Betty he's looking for.
Right.
Like that at least like has some merit to it.
Like it's still creepy as fuck.
But it would have to be like some actual like connection.
Right.
Just like this is, I seen you a hundred yards away.
Yeah, like I saw you at the fucking supermarket.
I was watching you for like three, three aisles.
Like this is more like crazy.
The Chrysler's version is more of like a creeper confessional hoping to catch that one, you
know, that got away and the one I couldn't kill.
Not even a creepy confessional.
I seen you.
I'll always be seeing you.
Like that one song from the police that people don't realize is about a stalker.
Which one?
Every breaths you take.
Every move you make.
I'll be watching you.
That's what it was really about.
I can't do anymore because they're like demonetized.
You did the beat too good.
It was, it was fucking, it was so immaculate.
We thought it was whatever YouTube you live.
For between seconds, 2015 versus 2017.
We knew.
I live streamed a Batman Arkham Asylum once.
Yeah.
Like 45, with 45 copyright claims.
That's what it felt like.
It was all like seconds from the song.
It's like, bitch, I turned that shit off.
What do you mean from the song?
I was so mad.
Like, how come we can't use the song?
I don't understand.
We can play the game.
They don't, they don't bother us with the game.
Why is the song the problem?
I'm not making money off the song.
I'm not making all money off the game.
I'm making money off my fucking personality.
Yeah.
Make play in the game.
And I think it depends on how big of a YouTuber you are.
If a Markiplier could nut in his mouth, he'd be fine.
Yeah.
But I'd do some shit and I'd get fucking a class-ace lawsuit on my fucking name.
Well, I mean, I guess if you're a PewDiePie, you get hit with a bunch of shit there.
Yeah, but he went too far and it wasn't even YouTube.
That was his, that was his dumb shit calling people the N-word on a bridge.
Yeah, but he is Swedish.
I'll give him credit.
They didn't have, they didn't have slavery or anything.
It's still weird word for him to say.
For him, it was just an insult.
So he knew it as an insult.
Yeah, that was quite the insult.
Or what they, they tried to get him on the Nazi thing where they said he was wearing
a Nazi uniform.
It wasn't even though.
No, it was a British military uniform, which is even funnier.
God.
And he was playing that game.
They got him on that game to papers, please.
Oh, that what he's wearing uniform for?
Yeah, on a little cosplay.
Cool.
Where you couldn't cross the border into that country.
Yeah, I tried to play that game, but I can't find it on a console.
I don't want to plan on a computer.
Yeah, it's only a computer.
Yeah, computers for for fucking losers.
I'm joking.
Don't be mad.
No, it's the PC master race and we're here.
I don't know.
The keyboard's like, are you just playing with a controller on it?
I can't, I'm dumb.
Controller.
I'm too dumb.
Where do you turn it on?
I'm too dumb.
There's no sound.
I'm dumb.
I'm gonna put my head through a brick wall.
What is it about people that are on a lower level intellect that are just fucking built
like tanks?
Like you could have a Rhodes Scholar, Yale alumni.
He sleeps in the shower.
He breaks his neck.
He dies.
You could have Stephen Hawking.
He's a fucking moron.
Get hit by a buzzer.
Ah, shit.
I'm okay though.
God gave him something.
Why is dumb so durable is what I'm asking.
Well, God didn't give him brains to survive.
So he had to give him a body that was somewhat resilient.
Fucking indestructible.
So then if you get both.
That's how I know I'm not that smart.
I gotta take a lightning strike to the fucking face.
Ow.
That hurt.
That's all I know because like as smart as I am, right.
My family thinks I'm dumb because if I got hit by a bus tomorrow, I'd be like, what are
you doing in front of the bus?
What the fuck you mean?
Like it'd be my fault, you know?
Yeah.
But if my sister like tripped, she'd be like, are you okay?
We got to take her to the hospital.
It's like a trampled by a fucking pack of Wolverines.
They wouldn't kill all of them.
I can't stand my sister.
What I'm saying more of the story.
Why is dumb so durable?
That is the question that will leave you guys on the suit.
Why is dumb so durable?
I guess I watched too much Twitter, but man, they can take a hit.
I feel like it's nobody's business.
But ain't that all sad before we head out?
I'm seeing guys fucking bash their skulls through a fucking window in a car.
And I'd be like, Jesus, why?
We'll leave you people with the question.
Talk to you later.