Last time on Crown of the Kobold King, Scarab
was able to reconnect the dwarf head to the corpse.
Doing this put the spirit to rest. But there
was still another problem. Monet was terrified
and running away into an unknown area. Our story
continues now. Scarab's going to fire at the
Jeepers Creepers. Scarab's going to fire at the
shade in front of real Monet. The one south of
Monet. This one. Yes. Okay. I forget how to do
that. There we go. You got it. Frick, man. Adieu.
This feels like the last time you lost both of
his friends. Natural 20. Yes! Beautiful. Okay,
and that's against shadow number two. Yes, finally.
Hey, by the way, did you... Where are them cards?
Oh! Oh! Card! Card. Card. Bob, did you... It's
been a while. I forgot that that happens. Did
you roll damage on that shadow that she went
through? Yes, three points of lightning damage.
Okay, good. Just want to make sure. I just want
to make sure, because it is anyone, even allies.
No, I counted it. I did a reflex save for it
and anything. I did a reflex save for it and
everything. And anything. I did a reflex and
anything. And all that. I did whatever you want.
I need another D4. It's like how it's like, all
these are going to upgrade to D6s or D10s, and
there's going to be five of them, but also a
D4. Just thinking. Take one of those with you.
Hell yeah. Let's rock. Let's kill shadows. Please
do. Here's to helping. I've got the power of
Goku and Christ on my side. Dude, what if Jesus
was in Dragon Ball Z? Fucking incredible. He's
pretty strong in South Park. And Rick and Morty.
Yeah, that one does not work. And Family Guy.
Well, he's kind of a dick in Family Guy. He's
a dick in Family Guy. He's a dick in Rick and
Morty too, but he was strong. He's ripped. Beat
the shit out of Rick and Morty. That's like my
favorite thing when Jesus is put in the show.
It's so funny. God, you guys need to see Preacher.
Holy shit. Is Jesus in it? Yes. Is he ripped?
Yeah, he's... I mean, he's a cool guy. I like
Jesus. Jesus is a fucking cool guy and preacher.
Okay, let's see here. Most I can't say anymore.
Spoils. Oof. For the sake of friendship, can
I get a D10 from each of you? Just two D10s from
my friends. Not from the evil man killing my
friends. That's purple. Oh! Oh, is it? Oh, is
it? One of my D12s is slightly smaller than the
other one. Even though they're the same size.
What the hell? Talking about your nuts? Put these
two D12s down. They're both the same style. One
of them is slightly shorter. Through Scarab's
head flashes a remembrance of his old compatriot,
Cobcorn, who got swallowed whole by... A great
dire beast. Scared things about this hole that
he's in. With no feasible way out. And his friends
before him. His friends before him. Dying. He's
going to hit this freaking shade for triple damage.
Let's count it up. Yeah! It's going to be...
54 magical damage. 54 magical. Magic is the only
property? Magical cold iron. Piercing. Piercing
precision. Make it go away. How much of it is
precision? 9. 46. Okay. Oh my god. Monet, behind
you, you hear the crack of the gun, and then
you hear just past your head a... As the bullet
whizzes by and the shade that was in front of
you disperses in a cloud. Just... Oh, you got
it! Hell yeah, dude. Scarab reloads. That's his
turn. Oh, actually, Tricky is going to step forward
just a little bit. Ten feet. For free. For free!
At the end of my turn, Tricky... I never do it,
though. I never do it, but... If he's not commanded,
he can do whatever he wants. Which brings us
to Monet. Here we go again. You were standing
face to face with the shadow of yourself. Monet,
get out of here! No, it's like Pokemon the movie
2000. The shadow punches her. You just have to
take it. You have to hug your shadow. Hug it.
Love it. Slap each other until you cry and then
we'll all cry. All of us are going to cry. Rootboard
turns to stone. Is that the... Is that a pen
and paper movie or is it a 3D image movie? It's
the Mewtwo. It's the Mewtwo and Mew. Yeah, Pokemon
the Movie 2000. But they remade it on Netflix.
There's a new version of it. It's really good.
It's like shot for shot and it's really good.
I don't know why they did it, but it's good.
Why do a shot remake? It's like what we were
talking about with Disney and the live action.
Why do you bother? Because people will pay for
it. It's just such a waste of money. What are
you thinking? I think I need to do a knowledge
check. I don't know what's going on with my shadow.
I mean, that makes sense. It's your shadow. If
my spirit was standing in front of me, I'd be
like, hey, man, what's up? I was wanting to do
one, too. I just haven't had the chance. I'm
going to do it. a knowledge check. Scarab knows
these things bleed now, so fire away. Go ahead
and give me one. It has to be either a cult or
religion. I have a cult. Natural 20. Yes! Oh,
yay! Natural 20. Natural 20. All right, what
do you want to know? How tall is he? I want to
know... How tall is he, my shadow? How much do
I get to know? The main thing, I mean, I'd like
to know a lot, but the main thing I want to know
is if he dies, do I die? Okay. Kind of situation.
Here's what you remember. You're trying to think
back, and maybe because your religion isn't very
high, maybe it's one of those books that you
just happen to read in the library that you came
from, and something, a passage maybe, sticks
out to you for a second, and you recall that
shadows, as they are referred to, are a peculiar
type of undead. They have typical undead immunities.
I think she would read about those, especially
living in... The Shadow Plane. Yeah. You know
that they are immune to things that other undead
are immune to, like bleed, death, disease, paralysis,
poison, precision damage, unconsciousness. You
also know that they have a hearty resistance
to those that remain on the Material Plane, gaining
a mechanical resistance 5 to everything aside
from force, ghost touch, spirit, or vitality
damage. and they get double that resistance against
non -magical sources they have a weakness to
light and a vulnerability to light as well in
fact you know that if a person were to bathe
themselves in magical light before dealing an
attack that it would cause them to do damage
they otherwise would not be able to do something
else you know about them shadows have the ability
to steal shadows you witnessed firsthand and
you remember based on that that should the shadow
that stole your shadow die While the shadow spawn
lives, then the shadow spawn will become a fully
autonomous shadow. So my shadow needs to die
before the one that stole my shadow dies. Or
you need to recover from enfeebled, in which
case the shadow will return to you before that
shadow dies. I don't remember which one took
my shadow. Guess you gotta kill them all. So,
did you get your, uh... Whatever questions you
wanted? Yes. I was worried that if we killed
the shadow Monet, that it would kill Monet. That
would be cool, though. That would be terrifying.
Monet will share all of the weaknesses and resistances.
Immune to precision. Weak to light and vitality.
Has resistance 5 to everything other than force,
ghost touch, spirit, or vitality damage. And
then gets double that against anything that is
non -magical. But you got magical and you do
big boom, big bang boom. So it really doesn't
matter. It's critical. It's critical. Still big
bang boom. If not critical, I do 5. Well. Or
less. Much less. Than before. Than 3. 3 die.
Two more actions, right? Two more actions. Two
more, Monet. So, I think... Is she just me? So,
like, my saves are all the same, too. Your saves
are AC. Deep in your soul. What's your biggest
weakness? And touch that. And tell us. How do
we kill you? I mean, I'll tell you. It's will.
It's 100 % will, which is why I ran away in the
first place. I mean, I did get a natural one,
but even... Scream boo. Like, my will is blissful.
Scare the shadow. Boo! Boo, motherfucker! But
the thing, what's important is the light. Does
that do damage to it? It doesn't just make it...
disappear to where they can't touch you, but
they're still living within the light. My understanding
is if you have a magical light on you, then you
can do the damage that wouldn't normally. Attacks
against the shadow are treated as magical if
made by a creature who is in magical light or
with an object that is magical light, such as
from the light spell. So it just allows you to
touch them. Instead of having to deal with resist
10, you do resist 5. Okay. So that doesn't really
matter for us. Dark souls? Magic. Yeah. That's
just for if you only do physical damage. Okay.
Well, I think I think I'm gonna go ahead and
have It's been damn scary. That's our AC is 23.
I am going to have Monet summon a Beyblade. I'm
in a baby. Right here. Is that going to hit room
or two? Nope, it hits one adjacent creature.
That's all right. Sorry, I was still thinking
of the broken version from before. Yeah, that
was the broken version. Perfect version. Perfect,
baby. Can you give me a minute? Do you have my
Beyblade token? I thought you were going to say,
can you play a Beyblade sound? I fucking just
did. Sorry, I didn't hear it. It sounded very
Star Trek. It had some like... Where is the Beyblade?
Ah, there it is. The Beyblade one. There it is.
Hell yeah. So she's going to summon her Beyblade.
Oh no! So no damage from the Beyblade. That's
a miss. That's her turn. That's what I said.
Gotcha. Alrighty. It is now shade number... Where
are we? Shade number one, top of round three.
Did you guys enjoy all that? No. Good. Alright,
let's... The one in the back's turn then. He's
just going to fly up right next to the Beyblade
and Rootmoor, and he's going to reach over and
give Rootmoor a little pat on the back. Not great.
22. Oh, it's a miss. Beautiful. And he'll do
another. And miss. Oh, my goodness. Bye -bye.
And that brings it to you, Rootmoor. This really
sucks because of... Rootboard doesn't have a
shield anymore. It broke. It exploded. And we
don't have a repair kit. I actually just remembered
something right now. No amount of crap. I couldn't
have done my big blade. Her elements aren't channeled.
Okay. Well, you did no harm, no foul, so we'll
just... You just glitched out for a second during
your turn. That's all that happened. You do still
have whatever actions those took that you want
to go back now that this one's over and do your
turn real quick. Because it missed anyway, right?
Yeah, it did. So she would summon her elements.
Throughout all of those turns... She just started
to do the same thing again. No, she can't. It's
two actions. Throughout all of those turns, I
was thinking I need to summon her elements. because
she didn't have her little swirly on her. Yeah,
both combats, I'm thinking, I need to raise my
shield. No, I don't have a shield. But then when
it got to my turn, I was like, well, I need to
find out what the fuck's going on with this shadow.
So she'll probably just... She'll just do a single
action elemental blast on Shadow Monet. Witch.
Yeah, Rootbar, use a dagger as a shield. That
is a hit because I know my own AC, but I'll go
ahead and say it anyways. That is a 30 to hit.
That's a hit. Damn! Did you say damn it, Mark?
No, I said hell yeah. Hell yeah! And she will
fire a whole bunch of them, a whole bunch of
little metal shards directly into Shadow Monet
for... I hate that. Hit that thing Get that out
of here Yeah 14 damage I've never had to do so
much math That's incorrect there's more damage.
Oh wait, there's more because Because it's melee
range and it's put so that's plus or con and
restraint hold on My character, what did I say,
14? Yep. It's actually 21 damage. Yeah! That's
a difference. That's a difference. That's a whole
other seven. That is a whole other seven. Praise
be, three sevens. Jackpot. All righty. It's a
good thing she didn't have her elements channeled,
I guess. Don't need those. Oh, she does. It's
just... Don't need those. I did. Retcon. The
thing that she did do with no elements. We don't
have to talk about that anymore. Yeah. That's
fine. Sorry. Okay. Let's pretend that didn't
happen. As long as it benefits us. Thank you
for letting me recount that, Bob. You're welcome.
All right. As you end your turn, we're going
to go ahead and just jump back over to Rootmoor's
turn. That's right. What did you want to do,
Rootmoor? Not good enough. Scarab, your turn.
Rootmoor looks at Monet, and then he looks at
Monet. And then he attacks Monet. All right,
50 -50. Which one do you hit? I know, right?
After moving. 5, 10, 15, 20. Fake Monet is now
flanked. You don't have an attack of opportunity,
do you? Nope. Okay. You could have just squoze
past the... I was going to take that chance anyway.
Just squeeze past the corner of the wall there.
I don't think that's possible. Why? Power attack.
It's not called power attack. It's vicious. Vicious
swing. Thank you very much. It's been such a
long time. I miss this game. Let's go. Come on,
baby. Yeah. 29 to hit. That's a hit. Hell yeah.
Another 6d10 coming. That's a lot. That's a d8.
God damn it. Cheater. It's uncheating. That is
also a D8. It's been way too long. I hope that
got picked up on Mike. It's also a D8. No, the
puting. Oh, it definitely did. This is a nice
sound. Rolling into a spittoon. Because if you
think about how gross it is that Chewing tobacco
was so common at some point that they had literal
like vases that you would spit into in establishments
My grandpa used dr. Peppercan I drank from it
once I did that to my dad's cocaine Stop magical
bludgeoning damage nice 22. All right, just got
a minus resistance Oh, so here's the thing about
Monet. She actually takes double damage from
Rootmoor. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. She's
weak to dwarves. That one time Rootmoor hit her.
Yeah, Rootmoor said a really mean insult one
night. So, actually, if she is just Monet, you
gotta take that into account that she takes extra
damage from Rootmoor. I think he believes it.
I think he's falling for it. Oh, shit. Oh, shit.
Hey, Imad, I think he believes your lies. I don't
feel good about this. You're gaslighting him.
I feel really bad about this. Imad learned to
gaslight. Should we tell him? Cody, Felicia's
lying. I'm not lying. We just don't know because
Ritmore's never actually hit Monet. Imad's become
a gaslight master. Gas -mast. Gas -master. Like,
there's no way that you could have known, and
that's not your fault. It's okay that you missed
that fact. Are you done? You can't tell, I'm
looking at Emod. It sounded like I was interrupting
Felicia, which I was, but not to ask her if she
was done. Are you done? Are you done? Turn to
Emod. Yeah, one action to stride, two actions
for the vicious swing. Okay, perfect. That's
going to bring us to shadow number one. Okay,
but you did add that extra damage. I did indeed.
The shadow's going to move, and it's going to
move through Shadow Monet. Shundi Mundi. Up to
here. Did you have to move her to move the other
one? Oh, excuse me. Yeah, I did, because it went
underneath Shadow. Oh, okay. That was very silly.
Reactive strike. All right, reactive strike.
Come on, baby. Hopefully you don't kill that
one if it's... Whatever. I think that's the one.
30 to hit. A critical. Oh, yes. Uh -oh. Make
sure I get G10s this time. That's okay. It's
probably fine. But it just makes it into another...
It's still kind of up in the air in my brain.
Doing this wrong. I just want to kill you first.
Yeah. Right. You said critical, right? Yes, sir.
Okay. Okay, let me add five more to that. Sounding
like a drug addict over there. This is critical.
This is critical, right? If it's mine, I can
have it. 32 days. Dang, from an opportunity.
Tie your shoes. Bam. Minus resistances. Pass.
You splatter the shadow. Yes. Oh. Which means
it is Shadow Monet's turn. And immediately you
see a look of fear over Washer as her allies
disappear one by one and she begins to flee.
She's going to steal my shadow. Wait. No, you
already used it. Yeah. Oh. Scarab can see that.
I have dark vision. He's got dark vision. And
he's sitting on a cow, so it's higher than three
feet. There you go. You can see she's gone. Cow.
I was wondering if anybody... Cow. All right.
Next initiative. Scarab. Monet said something
about having to kill her first. Yeah, Tricky.
And using a cavalier's charge, Scarab and Tricky
are going to run 60 feet. Yeah. Do I see anything
from this point? Question, do you have to charge
in a straight line? No. Okay. It's not really
a charge, but all right. That's first edition
shit. Or, you know, logic. I wouldn't exactly
say that people going around a track are charging,
but all right. She's there. And as we round that
corner, because actually he would stop like the
moment that he sees her, but they round that
corner. And as they round the corner, Scarab
fires, Tricky slides into that position. We're
going to shoot. We're going to shoot at her.
We're shooting. Here it comes. I'm going to shoot.
Hero rounds the corner and shoots down a fleeing
woman. I'm shooting. Sure does. Sure does. Here
comes the hero. She's got my shadow. Shoots her
in the back bravely. As you bravely shoot her
in the back. I don't even. Yeah, shouldn't even.
Oh, Matthew. I don't even. Shouldn't even look
at it. Oh, oh, oh. Shouldn't even look. That's
fantastic. Oh, shell it. AC23. 32 to hit. That's
a hit, not a crit. Not a dang crit. So it's going
to be a little baby damage. Frightened one, though.
Scared? I'm not frightened. Because it didn't
roll high enough? Oh, I'm spooked. Run away.
Not bad. Eight magical damage. Actually, that
is something. Oh, wait. Is Monet still shadow?
It would be eight magical plus three piercing.
So 11. Totals. Also, Monet is actually afraid.
She does get the frightened condition. Actually
frightened, too. Anytime Scarab is about to shoot
her. So, like, it is my character. I was listening
intently, like, oh, what is this? She's afraid
of guns. God damn it. Monet is afraid of guns.
Monet is afraid of guns. Especially when Scarab
is about to shoot her, so she should be frightened
too, so she should actually have a minus. So
that would be a crit. Well, I don't cover his
mouth. I'm just saying, like, you know, I just,
I know you don't have my character sheet, so
that's all on my character sheet. Scarab, if
he has a chance to say, he doesn't want her to
be frightened, he wants her to join the party.
He wants her to be terrified. Hey, come on! If
he couldn't tell from his mannerisms, he wants
her to join the party. Scarab reloads. That's
it. That's it. We owe you a gun here. Preach.
Oh, another thing about Monet. Anytime she gets
shot, she dies. Another thing about Monet. I'll
remember that. Next combat. Everyone has guns.
We've seen what you've been working with. Monet,
you're up. Machine guns. They have mounted M30s.
Whose turn is it? Well, Monet just finished her
turn. Okay, so it is one of the shadows. I think
that might skip me, so don't do it. Don't do
it. Rootmoor! Rootmoor! That's fine, Rootmoor.
Get over here, buddy. Come on. No, it's actually
the Shadow's turn. Come on, Rootmoor. Get over
here, buddy. And it's going to go right up next
to Rootmoor. I guess I can put it right here
so it doesn't trigger your AOL. I was going to
say, but I already used it. You did already use
it. It's actually going to go all the way around
you because it sees that you're weak and incapable.
Is this the one that had the greatsword? Yeah,
two greatswords. It was due wielding. In one
hand. Dark Souls 3. He's holding them like Darth
Maul. This is dumb. A very strong shadow. You
deserve to drop your dice. Piss off. He already
did. It's going to swing at you, Rubor. Thank
you, dude. 30. Oh. I mean, that's a hit. Damn.
Golly. Life too soon. 13 points of void damage.
Oof. And then you feel it begin to tug at you.
You are enfeebled one. Enfeebled one! And that's
all it's got. You don't get any more, Amon. No,
enfeebled sucks. You lose one of them per hour.
Per hour? Per hour. Which means now it is your
turn, Rootmoor. So that must be a creature specific
thing. The description doesn't say. Yes. Yeah.
A root more. I just closed my character sheet.
Right click. No, actually, sorry. Go all the
way over to where the ellipses is next to the
bar. I don't know what an ellipses is. The three
dots next to your little beautiful face on the
far right. This? Yep. And then click it. Third
period. Reopen close tab. Ellipses. He's broken.
Re -open, close tab. It doesn't know how to read.
I don't know how to read under pressure. Actually,
sorry. Right -click up where your tabs are. It
was the wrong spot. Right -click up there. Re
-open, close tab. I still gotta go through the
rigmarole. But you didn't have to type the address
in. Didn't that save you so much time? Shit,
what was I... You said it was my turn, and I
was going to my sheet, and I closed it. Nope,
next up is... Yeah, it is your turn. Okay. I
was all dead forward. Right, that was the command.
The Lord's gonna battle medicine himself. Yeah!
We're going for the DC 20. Oh, God, okay, so...
12 plus 14, 26. So that's just a regular success.
2d8 plus 10. Still good. 18. That's good stuff.
Okay, so he's almost full on his HP. Oh, so Rootmore
could go down next turn. With three attacks,
you say? He's not supposed to. Is that what you
said, Iman? No. No, I saw that he had three stamina
points. He's not supposed to have that. He's
at zero. Can he pep talk himself? Oh, he's at
zero? Nice. Come on, buddy. Let's see. So that
was one action for the battle medicine. I need
to put the little symbol on him so I don't forget.
What symbol are we using, Fi? I did a little...
No, I did the shield with the lightning bolt
on the bottom. Because that says don't heal me
again. I guess the shield with the chain around
it makes more sense. So it's the shield with
the chain around it. I'll change mine back. I
just really liked the little... Gosh. Sorry,
the heart with the chain around it. Okay. Sorry,
sorry, sorry. Oh, dang. Totally in another...
In the upper floor. But there's another shield
in this building. I just don't think we're on
it. I was just thinking about Rue Moore. Vicious
swing! I just... Shadow right in front of me!
Get away from me! Kill him! Oh, come on! Kill
him! 28 to hit. That hits. Okay. 2d10. How much
damage can you do to this yet so far untouched
shadow? Oh, no. But also, that's the one. We'll
see. He said that we wouldn't necessarily know
if that one happened. Yeah, I've just... I think
that's the one. 18 bludgeoning magic. Minus resistances.
Which there are none, which is awesome. Okay.
What else you got? That's it. Beautiful. That's
it. Shut up. I healed myself and don't damage.
No, you kicked ass. You leave me alone. Next
is Monet's shadow turn. Shadow turn. Stop. Why
are you running? Y 'all are going to chase this
thing and Rumor's going to die. Help! Help me!
That sucks. That sucks, bro. Moni can see over
there. Bye, Rootmore. A little bit. Goodbye,
Rootmore. She can see there. Let's get ready
to rumble. She can see that. I don't know. I
don't know about that. What do you mean? I'm
just kidding. I almost did it. Monet is over
here just waving a flashlight. I can see. I can
see. I can see it. I'm trying to track where
you can see versus the looking wall. Can you
move that out of the way? Can you stop? Monet's
shadow is just flat against the wall. Because
we're going from... Hold on. It better be. It's
a shadow. It should be able to hide very easily.
Shadow zone. Your line of sight can't extend
beyond that corner. So I guess actually you could
see up to that corner. There. Is this a wall?
Yes. Okay, thanks. Here's a little bit of the
darkness. Just for you. Thanks. All right. And
that's it for Shadow Monet. Scarab, it's your
go. Dang it. Just let her go, Scarab. Dang it.
Why? We'll catch up to her later. Why would I
do that? Because we don't know what's out there
and Rue Moore's gonna die. I don't want her to
go away. I don't want... What do we do? I don't
want her to go away. Oh, but no, for serious
though, like, she gets away, then what? You die?
Cody, can you grab me a beer? I know we didn't
land on you dying from that, but still. What
happens is Monet no longer has a shadow. That's
what happens. Feels bad. She doesn't get her
shadow anymore. I feel like there's more to it.
I rolled a natural 20. You rolled a big... Yeah,
you did. I rolled a natural 20. All right, Rootmoor.
Close your eyes. I'm about to shoot you. We have
to kill Rootmoor's shadow. And I mean, she got...
Like, I feel like... It's me! No, no! I feel
like she would definitely have... I think she
would have some hesitation about chasing her
any further because that's what got her in this
mess in the first place. Rootmoor, hurry up!
Quit playing around! Scarab's going to fire at
the shade in front of Rootmoor. You got a clear
shot with the wall corner in the way there? I
mean, how tall is the wall? Three and a half
feet. Beware on Tricky. Yeah, big pig. I'm a
big pig. Yeah, you can do that. Big pig. That's
going to be a... Again, dang it. 32 to hit. Ooh.
Critical. Critical? Critical. Monet's would have
to be a 33. Yippee! Oh, dang it. I crit again.
Oh, dang it. And that scare pulls that trigger.
36 magical. Bam. Wow. Clap, clap. Dead. Killed
him. Yes! Rootmoor, how fast can those little
legs take you? We've got a shadow to chase. I'll
be right behind you. Okay, action number two.
He's going to spend an action. Give Tricky two
actions. We're going to walk. 5, 10, 15, 20,
30. If I round the corner, do I see anything
more? He has darkvision. You can see forever.
Let me just remove all the darkness on here.
I don't even know why we use it. You're right.
No, not like that. But Tricky... Is this all
just hallway? Because Tricky will just keep walking
if... Bam. She ain't there. Okay, so... 5, 10...
Don't like that. 25... Just run past it. Who
cares? Do you think they killed her? No. Tricky
and Scarab are going to end further in the hallway.
Oh, no. We're just triggering encounter after
encounter. And Scarab's going to reload his weapon.
It's a GM's dream. This is great. No, I'm having
fun too, man. We're going to die. No, we're going
to die. We'll be fine. You're fine. Not necessarily.
I mean. We won't necessarily be fine. That's
exactly what I said. I know. I loved reiterating
it. Scarab reloads. That's it. So we see some
Zimbos. You see nothing. You don't see shit.
All right, I know. Shut up. Hey, for the listener.
We got leapers! Leapers! Not lepers. It's the
rubber band man zombies. The jumpies. Yeah. Yes.
Spring feet. Yes, you do. Stare at what you see
as you begin to run down the hallway. It begins
to widen into what appears to have been, maybe
at one point, some sort of dormitory or shared
living space. However, the room in front of you,
what you can see, much of it seems to have collapsed
and or been ruined into disrepair. There are
broken bits of furniture strewn about the floor,
as well as piles of rubble and rock. And from
among them, you can just barely make out these...
Similar undead heads to what you've seen so far.
Much like in the graveyard, these you already
know are Festrogs. Bodies covered in pulsating
pustules and boils begin to slowly crawl out
of the rubble and degree, and they let out a
low hiss as they see you coming and they hear
you screaming. I'm going to add a lot of people
to initiative. Give me a second. This is quite
intense. I do say so. What are we going to do,
sleep? I'll tell you what I'm going to do. As
soon as we end this session, I'm going to go
work on another character sheet. We're going
to have to sleep. Yeah, I was thinking we were
going to do that. Yeah, we definitely have to.
I hope you can. He said that he's going to have
to add a bunch. It's okay. Yeah, they're not
crazy strong or anything. Yeah, we'll be fine
with these. It's just nuts. This is our third
encounter. The first one, we got lucky. We were
able to figure it out and just not have to fight
the thing. Second one, it's like, where's Monet?
Third one, get Monet's shadow. Yeah, this is
when the anime finally catches up with the manga.
And it's just boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. No
more filler. We're just going, going, going.
Alright, so Scarab, you just finished your turn
on the precipice of the room. And you can see
these creatures begin to crawl up. And they immediately,
after crawling off the debris, you can hear them
clicking and clacking to each other and making
noise before they all begin to charge you. One
of them is going to run up 20 feet. Yeah, we'll
get two of them. We'll run up. And first one
will take a swing at you with its jaws. 17. Terrible
roll. It's going to try to bite. What the hell
are you talking about? Sorry. Gray roll. 18 on
the second roll. Also a miss. The second one
is going to try to bite at you for a 27. Hit.
For 10 points of piercing damage. Is that my
ears, belly button? Bit you on the inside of
your belly button. What are we going to put in
there, Tricky? Hopefully something flashy. All
right, Monet, you're up. I'll tell you what.
I'll tell you what. Monet is going to... Bing,
bang, boom. Big bang. 10 foot burst right here.
Ooh. Ooh. Ooh. 10 foot burst tremor. Two actions.
Yeah, what does that do again? So I actually
need to give a message to anyone out there. In
the past, we've done tremor 1d8. plus 3d10 because
the wording on path builder was super weird at
the top for the damage it had d10s and it had
d8s so it was very confusing it seems like they've
updated it now and it only has 3d8 so it is 3d8
okay okay there are no d10s in path builder anymore
so i'm going off of that like i said in a past
one if i'm doing my character wrong let me know
nobody did that's okay Hell yeah, man. Push on.
We're going back two chapters. In that one, I
said I'm going off of what Pathbuilder says because
that's all I really have to go off of. It's not.
But that's what I said. The rules ain't well
expressed. We change them. We make them work.
Yes. Okay, so 3d8 bludgeoning. They get a basic
fortitude save. Come on. Fortitude. 17 and a
22. The 22 passes. Damn. 17 fails. Not bad. So
the failure takes 14 bludgeoning. Oof. Okay.
That's really good. The pass is 7. And then that
area that you took away is difficult terrain.
Okay, let me redraw that with a circle. It is
difficult terrain until the start of my next
turn. And that is Monet's turn. Good stuff. She
moved and did a tremor. Difficult terrain. 21
damage. That makes it to where? Let's see. 1,
2, 3, 4, 5 of the Festerogs get to go now. Golly.
Wow. I have one running. Five, ten. Very good.
Yeah, that's actually amazing. Yeah, can we see
any more of this area, by the way? Fifteen. Not
from where you are. Scarab's the closest one.
That's the advantage you get. Twenty -five. That's
the end of that movement. Got that difficult
terrain. All right, so it's also going to charge
up to you, Scarab, and it's going to try to bite
you. Natural one. You gotta do it. That's right.
There's a thing. Did you poo -poo in your pants?
It is enfeebled one. I'm gonna do the sleepy
face for him. It's a minus one to all dex checks
including AC and reflex saves. And he doesn't
have any more actions, so then 5, 10, 20, 30.
That's the end of that movement. And then 10,
15. Oh, my God. Scarab. Just cut a wall of rubber
band man all over you, man. Stretchy zombies.
Yeah, not sure what to do. And do you still have
a shadow over by it? No, that never existed.
Okay, so that second one is going to charge up
as well and try to bite you, Scarab, because
that's the end of his movement. Natural two.
Oh, yeah. Not going to hit with that. Natural
two, huh? What's it evil, huh? Not that that
really matters. Eleven. Yeah, nine plus nine.
Plus nine. Okay, that is it for all of them that
moved, which brings us back to the top of what
is now round four with Rootmoor. Oh! Rootmoor
hears a bunch of stuff happening. Yeah, screeching
and kerfuffle. Jumpers! Leggy boys! I'm not Rootmore.
No, I'm Rootmore. I'm Rootmore. Rootmore. Monet's
shadow went that way. He's so far behind. Little
clink, clink, clink, clink. Rootmore spends all
three actions running 60 feet, and he's still,
he made it probably halfway towards the fight.
So it's going to be another turn. He's a bit
sleepy, so he's going to stop here. Kidding,
kidding. Hey, tiny legs, man. Get here. Run more,
run more. Run more, run more. All right. Scarab
and Monet, what you can see is from the back
of the room past all the festerogs, you see...
Federales. Federales. Oh, Mono Shadow. She sits
to go by all fine. Ain't attacked by none of
these boys. They're all good pals. She's walked
by in the darkness. Walked past. She's looking
for the vending machines. She got all piled up
with the zombie boys. Real quick like two. Real
quick like two. Seeming. Seeming. Seemingly.
Ding dang all cozy up. Six zombies. Six zombies.
New zombie. Okay, and after that is gonna be
another fast drug. Damn. Okay, that's one. Level
four. Level three, some shit. Fifteen. Jesus,
so many guys. 25, that's two. I need some spray.
Just have him hit his friend. You know, he really
wants to get over there. This one's going to
swing at you, Monet, jumping at you, biting with
its jaws. 15 to hit. That's not a hit. Yeah,
it didn't feel good. Okay. Didn't feel right.
Yes. And I'm good at hitting. Don't like how
do you know? I forgot to move one of them. There
are so many of them, and they're still festering.
I forgot to move the last one. Oh, my God. Why
is this one three times bigger than the rest
of them? No. Oh, I forgot. Just kidding. He's
normal sized, and there's just so many of them.
The screen is eight. Eight zombies. Eight leaping
lizards. Leaping lizards. 30. Golly and a half.
That one's going to swing at you as well, Monet.
Once again with the jaws 21 to hit Wait wait
that could be a lie. That's a mess. I knew that
swinging with his jaws You probably should have
used his neck back to scare them Do they have
reactive strike? I don't know To do a knowledge
check Yeah, yeah Wowzers dang it Monet We got
to get out of here, bro. How's your fortitude?
Fortitude? It's not amazing. I'm not really trying
to stay and bang. They're missing, so I don't
feel like it's the worst thing in the world,
but this is not great. No. This is a bad swarm.
Bad swarm. I would rather run and shoot personally.
Yep. Scarab scaredly looks down at Monet, his
eyes very wide. They're usually just all black
because he's got lizard eyes, but you see whites
around the edges of his eyes. He looks at you
and says, We gotta run! Scarab turns, fires his
weapon at the... Okay, how do I say this? Pick
it for me. This one right here, right between
Monet and Scarab. Okay, the one to the southwest.
He's going to fire at that one as tricky begins
the cavalier's charge. Okay, go ahead and roll
the hit. Then you can do the movement. Come on,
come on, come on, come on, come on. Big money.
Let's see a 20. That'd be wild. Come on. Nope.
21 to hit. That's a hit. Yeah, dude. Yeah, see,
they're definitely lower level. Definitely lower
level, possibly. Still so many of them, and I
don't know if more are going to show up. Yeah.
Yeep. That's warm. Ugh. A magical cold iron might
actually do something to them, if I'm remembering.
Okay. I need a reflex from both of you, because
as your bullet pierces through the creature,
its pustules burst, spreading a green liquid
onto both of you. Ugh. Reflex. Ooh. 28. Critical
success. Nothing happens to you. Scarab's in
the 30s. Alright, nothing happens to you as well.
And I did one for Tricky as well. 24. And...
Okay, half damage for Tricky. Okay. Right? Let
me double check that. 24 you said? 24. Nope,
you're fine. Okay. 24, you say? Yeah, so all
three of you, this green liquid kind of like
splashes onto you and there's like a slight sizzling,
but you're able to wipe it away, feeling no lasting
damage. And Scarab and Tricky run back down the
hallway towards Rootmark. Oh, hello! Zombies!
And Rootmark's just out of breath. I just ran
60 feet. Oh, you just hear the squeals of the
undead in the back like they're in a parking
lot. Oh, God. I have anxiety. I have anxiety.
Oh, no. All right. What you guys don't see because,
you know, you can't. Reload. Scarab just ran
away, and now Monet is left here alone. With
eight zombies. With eight zombies. Run, girl,
run. Festerogs. Festerogs. Festeringogs. Yeah,
final action, reload. Rootmoor. Passing it to
you. Rootmoor's turn. That's not how it goes.
I'm not passing it to you. We're playing honor
rules here. One of them's going to run up to
Monet and swing, trying to bite. That's a 22
to hit, which does not. That's a miss. It's going
to try to swing its claws at you for its second
one. Probably less chance to hit here. Actually,
90, 17 plus 5, 22. Just missed. Yes. Wow. Oh,
my God. Oh, my God. All right. Next one's going
to run up. This gentleman here, as they begin
to swarm you, is going to swing as well, trying
to bite for a 27. That's a hit. Not a lot of
damage on these. Don't worry. It's only going
to be five points of piercing damage. And as
it bites you, it's going to spend its last action
to begin to rip away at your flesh where it bit.
What was the damage again? I'm sorry. Fuck. No
worries. Not that bad. The damage isn't bad.
He's going to rip your fingers off. The bit of
you that he was able to bite, he tears away a
strip of your flesh and you watch him gulp it
down in front of you. So gross. Shut up. You
can see all of his pustules begin to vibrate
like he's being invigorated by it. Yippee! They
wiggle when you work them. From that tear, you're
going to take an additional one point of slashing
damage. Gee purge. So it's like your appendix.
It doesn't matter. You don't need it. You don't
need skin. My pinky toe. I think a pinky toe
is more than one damage. You're going to fall
down real hard. I know. No balance. Especially
with that metal hand. Little known fact. Fetchlings
have two pinky toes on each foot. I would believe
it. I've seen cats like that. I thought they
were hooves. Willy's got an extra toe, or is
he one -toe shy? He's one -toe shy. Yeah, sorry.
He has an extra negative toe. Wow. Yeah. I've
seen them extra -toed. Dogs kind of have that
little weird thumb. Yeah, they got a little...
It's called a dewclaw. They could be like raptors,
but nah, they gave up. Yeah, it's like way up.
Monet, now it is your turn. Okay. Cool. Monet's
going to run. Get me out of here! No. Damn it.
That's the thing. I don't want to get multi -grabbed
by these dudes. She's not going to run yet. She'll
run in a second. Are you sure? She's going to
run in a second. She's going to run in a damn
second. Careful. You going to do a big boom?
That way you're hitting all these without hitting
yourself. Tremor. Trying to pass your own save?
Yep. Oh, beautiful. Wow. All right, so it's a
fortitude save, right? Fortitude. And you're
affecting one, two, three, four, five, six, seven
of the eight. And I'll have seven D20s, so this
is going to take a second. Just pay attention
to the timing and jump. Okay. Let me just do
it this way. Doge the Blast. Okay, the one to
the north of you got a natural one. So what's
the damage on that? Oh, oh, ooh. I think it's
still just... Holy crap. That's double, dude.
It's not double. No. No. Is it a... We'll kind
of save it. It's a basic. Yes, it's doubled.
It's doubled? Double damage. Basic. Okay. The
damage you're rolling is for the spell. They're
all going to take that damage. Let me just roll
the damage. Yes. Okay. So that guy takes 32 damage.
And you kill him. Good stuff. Good stuff. Right?
Eight plus eight is 16. Yes. Okay, thank you.
All right, this one, right to the east of him,
got a... That's a fortitude save. He got a 22.
That's it. That is a pass. That's nice. Okay,
so he's going to take half of 16. He takes eight
damage. Okay. Is he going to copyright you if
you play it anymore? Had to. I like that. Things
are turning around. Hero moment right now. Failed
to save. 13 total. Is that a crit fail? 13 total.
10 under. No, that's not a crit fail, so you
take 16 damage. Okay. 16 damage. That one is
the one that got shot. He is also dead. Yes!
Give me more. Give me more. Next one. The one
to the south of you. Natural 19. Got a 26. That
is a pass. He takes 8 damage. 8 damage to him.
Okay. And then this one next. A lot of rolling.
20. That is a fail. So he'll take 16. Yeah. That's
crazy. This one next. Natural one. 32. We know
the damage. He is dead. Completo. And this one,
the last one. Pop, pop, pop. 16. Fails, takes
eight. And he is also dead. Wow! And that's all
of them? Dude! That's all of them. Okay, Monet
takes eight damage. You failed your own save.
Worth it. I have to make you another circle.
How long does the difficult terrain last? Until
the start of my next turn. So that one's gone.
You can just move it over. Cool. And now Moni
will run. If I can get a hold of the damn thing.
Dude. Crisis averted. Holy shit. Not completely.
And we still have four. I can't grab this thing.
My circle. Half of them are dead. That's amazing,
dude. Can I... Can I, like, vote for a pee -pee?
Yeah, you get a pee -pee. Because, also, like,
it was very smart, because I understand now,
you could have stepped out, but then you wouldn't
be able to run, so it was very smart to do that.
Pee -pee for feet. You gave me a session pee
-pee. You gave me a... Well, give it back, ungrateful.
No, I'm sorry. No, now you don't get one. Okay.
Don't call me Jesus. He doesn't look a thing
like Jesus. Scary. And now, Monet runs. Yeah,
you've left four of them standing with a massive
crater, and you ran away. I ran away. Well, the
four, coincidentally, the four that are up are
the four whose turns it is. Damn! Please don't
hit me. So, 5, 10, 15, 20, 25. That one's going
to run up to you and try to bite you. Just wait
until I get there. I'm going to kick their ass.
Only three will be able to. 24. That's a hit.
Okay, that's going to be not a lot of damage.
That's a poo -poo damage. Six points of piercing
damage. And for its second action, same as before,
it's going to try to tear away that piece of
flesh. Drink it. One more point of slashing damage
on top of that. Okay, not bad, not bad. And it
looks like it's been nourished in some way. I
don't care about its nourishment. As this thing
comes scrambling around the corner on all fours.
It was one movement. 5, 10, 15, and then it charges
forward like its claws scraping on the cobblestone
as it slides around the corner before it comes
barreling down the hall, and it's going to jump
forward, and it's actually going to bite at you,
Scarab. Dodged. Natural 20. Oh. Don't worry,
he doesn't have a name, so no card. That's bad.
Just give him a card. Double damage. Give him
a card. Play right. Yes, finally. I don't want
to get hit. Okay, that's going to be... I hate
getting hit. This game sucks! Get mad. 16 points
of piercing damage. That's bad, man. Then the
third one. That's a pretty ugly thing to do.
It's very out of character. 20, 25. Yeah, they're
just gonna... pile on in. As soon as those two
come scurrying around and jumping at you, you
see the other two spin around the corner as well,
sliding on their claws before they barrel in
your direction. And that is it for them. Which
brings us to Rootmoor. Oh my god! I can't see,
I can't see! Pick me up, pick me up! Oh shit.
Throw a bomb. Yeah, if you could. Or you could
just... Do a... They were too far. They're too
far for... Yeah, because it's only 30 feet. Two
actions left. I got to... I have to do a spell
because I can't reach them. I have to do a spell.
I have to. I have to. He's addicted. This guy
in the back right here, untouched. Just saying.
Well, he can leave. He's not a part of this.
Fair point. He goes around the corner. Thank
you. Bye. You're not a part of this, man. Takes
psychic damage. Slowly walks away. Feels bad.
Who are you? I'm the DM. I'm Felicia. No, I'm
talking to the man. Oh, sorry. Yeah, the men
are talking, Felicia. Close my mouth. Why is
he in the wall on your screen? I was gonna say,
what is happening with the guy on the wall? He's
supposed to be right here. I jokingly made him
walk around the corner and then put him back
and for your side it's just like, no, he can
be in the wall. Any of them hurt? All the others
are hurt. Just the one in the back is not. Correct.
All the others are almost the same in HP. Okay.
Shit. Sorry, they all look equally damaged. Wish
I could do more. Almost like the developers ran
out of space and it's just a copy of the same
creature over and over again, even though they
were hit in different places. The one next to...
No, this one's facing the other way. That's good.
He's different. That's good. He's not looking,
so he's flat -footed. He's not looking. He's
surrounded. I'm attacking that one, the one that's
not paying any attention. I just realized an
oopsie I did. What'd you do? What'd you did?
Tremor is an overflow. Monet shouldn't have been
able to move away. She would have had to channel
her elements again. Cheater. Do you ever get
tired? No, I'm just kidding. Keep the peepee.
It's fine. We live and we learn. But she doesn't
have her elements channeled right now is what
I'm saying. What if you just next turn just have
two actions? Make up for it like that. Okay.
Yeah, I could do that. I could do that. I could
do that. There you go. Big thinker. Wouldn't
that be the same as you just channeling your
actions as your first action on your turn? Well,
so then... Basically, if I just give myself two
actions this round, I take away the movement.
Because instead of doing my tremor... And moving,
I would have had to channel my elements and do
a tremor. Because channel elements is one move.
Or one action. So you would have been swarmed
on your own. I would have been swarmed on my
own. In a hallway surrounded by your friends.
Exactly. That's a big cheat. You're right. I'm
really sorry. I didn't mean to do that. That's
why I wanted to give the PP back. Because it
wasn't a hero move. It wasn't a... It would have
been if I did it correctly and I just stayed
there. Then it would have deserved the... That.
Clay's with tears in his eyes. Heartbroken. Don't
have all the good men gone. That's pretty good.
26 to hit with Divine Lance. That's a hit. Fantastic.
That's a critical hit. Single target. Single
target, yes. On the one in front? This guy. The
one that's adjacent to Monet and Scarab. Okay.
44. Yeah. Which is 84 on a crit. Yeah. Yeah.
22 spirit damage. Rad. And in a flash of light,
he's gone. Oh, bye. That is it for Rootmoor.
See you. Bye. Bye, guys. Bye, Rootmoor. I almost
said, bye, Rootmoor. Ole, Scarab, get out of
the way. Let me smack him. I'm going to slap
him in the face. Whatever, bozo. We'll just stand
there. I don't give a shit. Whatever. We'll just
hide behind the pig. I don't care. I want to
stay and bang. Turn to new leaf. I like to lay
down and bang. Something happens that you guys
can't see and it's Scarab's turn. What kind of
gross weird stuff is happening up there? What
kind of weird stuff is happening up there? I
think it's Monet's shadow. Shadow Monet! I've
come to realize that I'm home now. Home now.
Let's see here. Just shorten it to Shadow Moan.
Shadow Moan! Scarab is going to fire at the...
The freak that's right... She's going home now.
Scarab's going to... I forget that I can do this.
Scarab's going to fire at this freak. That's
next to Monet. Okay. We're shooting. We are shooting.
Ooh, okay. I remember how to count really quick.
That's going to be a 25 to hit. Critical hit.
Oh! Jeepers. That's going to be 34 magical cold
iron piercing. Or four of that's piercing, if
that matters. Seven of that's piercing, rather.
I'll note, it's different with these guys. Because
the piercing is actually, it's weakness. And
the gold iron. And the bullets. And the bullets.
How much total? 34. It is dead. Immediately.
I knew it. Completed. 34. Scarab reloads, and
we're going to fire again at the one closest.
Yes! Eat lead, shithead. Oh, baby. Eat shit,
damn it. It's going to be a 21 to hit. 21 to
hit. Seven magical cold iron piercing precision.
Rather, precision is the D4s, my bad. Precision.
Precision. All right, precision done. Now for
the finally attack. Wait, shoot, reload, shoot.
Tricky's gonna walk behind Rootmoor, so he gets
a chance. Nice. Oh, no. Reaction to scoot past
Rootmoor. Kind of, like, squeeze you against
the wall more than necessary. But just be like,
oh, here you go, Rootmoor. Smush you against
the couples. We're just up here murdering. Don't
know what you've been doing. Feel all the pig
fur brush against your face as it mushes you
into the wall, and as the butt passes by, just...
He keeps going. Right in your face. This whole
thing, starting with the poltergeist, it's like,
what's happening? Literally, all Rootmore did
was break a cage on that, and then he ran south
for a very long time, hit a ghost, and then he's
running back north again. Out of breath. There's
a lot going on right now. How do American soccer
players do this? It sucks, I can tell you. Oh,
trust. I love playing soccer. Yeah, soccer is
one of my favorites. I love playing soccer when
you're a fucking sweeper or a goalie, and it's
like, I'll just chill here and make sure nobody
scores. It's cool. It's just fucking doing laps,
man. But if you're playing a forward, my God.
Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth.
Whose turn is it? Passing it to you, Rootmore.
It's Monet's turn. Monet goes. Monet, you go.
Monet is going to move away. Oh, damn it. I forgot.
Okay. Sorry. Real quick. Scarab, you shot two
Festerogs next to Monet. Monet, I need two reflex
saves. You're getting splattered. You're getting
dang splattered. And the other one, it didn't.
The other one that got vaporized. Don't we need
to worry about it? No, it wasn't piercing damage.
Okay, that's a natty 18 plus 14. Oh, it's piercing
damage. Okay, so no damage on the first one.
And then that's a 21. Two points of poison damage
to you then. God damn it, she's enfeebled. She's
damn in poison. She's dead. She's dead. God damn
it, she's dead. God damn it. You gotta get rid
of this fatigue and enfeeble. And then she runs
away. To here. And, um... I was kidding. Don't
run away. I don't want them coming at me. I can't
do it. Skyrim puts his foot on Rootmoor's back
and shoves him a little bit towards the fess
frogs. Just further into the hallway. There you
go, bud. They smell like poo -poo. I don't like
it. Everything you asked for. To here. I was
going to say bang, but here we are. She's going
to run far away, and she's going to yell, you
got this, Rupemore. Trips him on her way past.
Kicks him onto the floor, shoves him. Pulls out
her pants, farts on him. Pulls him back up, keeps
running. The other thing, Monet gets on her hands
and knees behind him and I shove him over her.
She wipes a bit of the poison on his face. She's
behind him, but you shove him forward and he
falls down anyway. There you go. That's everything
you ever wanted, right, Rue Moore? What is the
Festerog's turn? He didn't tell us to run. You
asked for too much. They're both going to screech
and charge at Rootmoor. Oh, hello. Trying to
bite you first. Ooh, 28. Oh no, that's a hit.
Minimal damage, five damage piercing. Okay. And
then it's going to try to tear that chunk of
flesh away and eat it. Don't. Don't. Two points
of slashing damage. It looks like he has a glow.
Are you pregnant? Stop. You can't be pregnant.
Maybe now. Now he's pregnant. You're the father,
Rootmore. Oh, no. I can't afford this. Then the
other one's going to do the same. Hey, do you
want to go to Mexico? Actually, I'm sorry. Let's
go to Mexico. Yes. Other one's going to do the
same. Charge and swing. He misses. I'd like to
retcon my last movement. Last action. He's going
to swing again. Probably going to miss unless
snap 20. No. I want to go to Mexico. Rudy. Round
five. Oh, wow. Round five, Rudy. So, let's see.
The one that's hurt is the one to the left. They're
both hurt. They're both hurt. The one that's
to the left is the one that just took a big old
bite out of you, though. Gross. He treated you
like a Christmas ham. Yeah, screw it. Hammer
time. Regular old hammer swing. Regular. Come
on now. Come on, baby. That'll still hit. 22.
That's a hit. Okay. He's absolutely right. 13
bludgeoning. Smash, smash, smash, smash, smash.
13 bludgeoning. Not quite. Crunch. Doing it again.
Give him a hearty bonk, but he's still standing.
Same guy, swinging again. Ooh, double checking
something. One moment, one moment. Nope, you're
fine. Okay. Come on, hit a plus ten. Let's go.
Come on. Seventeen. Hit. Crunch, crunch, crunch.
Seven bludgeoning. Seven bludgeoning. Same guy?
Same guy. It's gonna do it. It's gonna do it.
That's it. Yeah, as your hammer swishes through
the air, you hear the sickening thud first, followed
by an immediate squelch and pop as the blisters
begin to ooze out the side of its head and it
collapses to the ground motionless. Yeah! Yes.
Yes. Third swing at a plus five. Come on. Give
me a good roll. Give me a good roll. Never a
negative one. You can't fail. Give me a good
roll. Come on. Ooh, that's a 12 on the die. 17.
Hit. Yeah. Come on, baby. Make it a big one.
Oh, darling. 18 bludgeoning. Yeah. And you killed
the last person. Big shot. Ew. And you are out
of initiative. Wow. Three encounters. Wild. We
need to sleep so bad. Yeah. It's only seven.
It's 746. I know, which is sad. It makes me sad
thinking about the 46 part. It makes me sad,
too. Yeah, just round down. Just round down.
Yeah. Round down until that hour hits, and then
all of a sudden, what happened? It's 8 o 'clock!
Whoa! Okay, yeah, wow. You guys, I'm sleepy.
Dude, that was awesome. Bravo. I did think Monet
was going to die. Me, too. That was... And part
of me was like, Felicia, why are you trying to
kill Monet? I wasn't. I know you weren't. Not
at one point. Beelzebub got in my head and he's
like, Felicia's trying to kill Monet. I was like,
no, it's not true. It's impossible. No, that
was just a little test. It's like, oh, you want
Monet to die? Let's see what that looks like.
But here we are. You had some cool little hero
moments. It was awesome to hit seven dudes at
once. Even though I was cheating. And here we
are. Yeah, I know. It's the preparing, right?
You have to use the action to prepare. Yeah.
I mean, we literally haven't played in over a
month. I still would have been able to hit them.
I just shouldn't have been able to run away afterwards.
That's the only thing. I still would have taken
the damage. They still would have taken the damage.
I just may have died in that spot. They probably
wouldn't have been able to hit you. Scarab reloads
his weapon. He has 32 bullets. I have to PP.
Oh, shit. But then I come back and reach the
credits? That's not, like, 32 is not, like, low
or anything. But that's just for anyone who's
counting. That's, you know. That was, that was.
It's not endless. In these, in those three rooms,
that was, like, 15 shots. Yeah. No, I love that.
It's pretty big. And I get, I'll get 10 if we
rest. Yeah, I think keeping track of ammunition,
arrows, bolts, I think that's amazing. That's
more immersive. I love doing that. I mean, if
we run out, we'll see what happens. Gotta figure
something out. Figure something out. A couple
of daggers. We got daggers and a boar. We got
a flying claw. I got a boar. I think it's somewhere.
Flying talon. Yeah, yeah. That's got reach. You
can either make a melee strike or a rain strike.
And if you do a rain strike, I think you can
trip. Plus 14 to hit. It's just the damage is
trash. You're not getting any 45, 54 damage crits
with that. And don't forget, pig. Pig don't run
out of ammunition. Pig got teeth for days. 100%.
Pig thrash. It's definitely dangerous. If we
had arrows, or actually I need bolts. You can't
use... Is this like video games? Do you need
bolts for... Yes. For crossbows and arrows? Okay.
I don't know if we have any bolts. I do love
the preface of the question. Is this like video
games? Isn't it like video games? But they're
based on real life. I know. Where actually video
games are based off of these systems? Yeah. But
it's like... I don't... I mean, you could probably
fire a bolt from an... from a bow, it just wouldn't
notch, which means it would probably not go where
you want it. Oh, you know what? Actually, bolts
are way shorter, so you wouldn't be able to use
the same force either. And you couldn't do an
arrow in a crossbow because they'd be too long
and the fletching gets in the way. Yeah, you
would have to alter the arrow to work in a crossbow.
Shorten it, adjust the head, maybe, I don't know.
Refletch it. Go dual dagger, fuck it. Can't do
that. Your tusks and his combined. Tricky attack
twice, you attack twice, boom. Four attacks in
a round. With only like one penalty to the attack.
Or I just take several days of rest because each
day I'll just make more bullets out of thin fucking
air and then you guys figure out what you do
with your days as I just sleep and make bullets.
Oh, this was crazy. I mean, literally, next episode.
Wake up, your wagon's gone. Damn. Like, next
episode is going to be. Again. Next episode is
just going to be us looting three rooms. That's
it. We got to loot the library. We got to loot
where all those shadows were. We also got to
find Shadow Monet. Shadow Monet is just running.
Shadow Monet. It's like, that sounds like a.
Every round, 90 feet. James Bond movie. That
really sucks for Monet, but what a cool story
arc. Come from Shadow, no longer have Shadow.
Dude, what if, you know, future Curse Caravan,
we run into Monet again in another party, but
it's actually the Shadow Monet. That'd be fun.
Oh, I got a wicked backstory. Yeah. Super solid,
man. One day I wasn't, and then I was. Yeah,
we played. I mean, it's obviously going to be
cut down because of, you know, silence and bullshit.
But we sat here for four hours and played this.
And I miss it. This was a lot of fun. Yeah, me
too. When we get back from birthday trip, we
got to just get back into it. Yeah. I love doing
this with you guys. It was a good time. Hell
yeah. The Cursed Caravan uses... Oh. Oh! It's
been a while. The Curse Caravan uses trademarks
and slash or copyrights owned by Paizo Inc. used
under Paizo's community use policy at paizo .com
slash community use. We are expressly prohibited
from charging you to use or access this content.
The Curse Caravan is not published, endorsed,
or specifically approved by Paizo. For more information
about Paizo Inc. and Paizo products, visit paizo
.com. The Curse Caravan theme music. we play
at the end of each of our episodes is written
by our very own Matthew. Yay, Matthew. Yay. Hello.
Hello. Hi. We would also like to thank Michael
Govey Studios for any music that we use for our
music and ambiance, the world reference tabletop.
Wow, I can't. Hold on. Can't do it anymore. Can't
do it, Michael Govey. We would also like... I
can't do it. We would also like to thank Michael
Kelphy Studios, the world reference for tabletop
RPG audio for any music that we use for our ambiance.
You can find out more about Michael Kelphy at
michaelskelphy .com and you can check out their
Patreon and YouTube links in the description.
Leave us a comment and rate us five stars on
your podcast app of choice, especially Apple
Podcasts. Spotify also allows you to rate and
comment. And come on, do we have any comments
to read? yeah we got we got a few um there's
a obviously if you see the time stamp on these
episodes there's been a big gap we've been busy
and stuff but uh thank you guys very much we
haven't received a single complaint about us
not posting episodes so get to it thank you no
no no no don't complain come on don't let them
off what i'm saying is thank you for not complaining
like you know And also haven't received a single
dollar, so. Oh, God. Or death threat. That's
not the point. Like, I mean, just like you guys
know, you guys have lives. We also have lives.
And unfortunately, like, if we had the time to
do this all the time, we would do it all the
time. But holy shit, we are busy. Indeed. I'm
just glad to be doing it right now. But we've
got one comment. On episode 49 of Crown of the
Kobold King from It's -a -Roy. It's -a -Roy.
It's -a -Roy says, I'm looking forward to the
new books coming out and what you guys are going
to do with them. Nice. Super excited. Be neat
to check it out. Yeah, there are a lot of new
books coming out and it's really cool. There
is, you know, I'll just say it. It's not a guarantee,
but this is our... our goal what we want to do
after crown of the kobold king i do want to run
an adventure and it's it's a book that's a little
older it's still second edition but it came out
i want to say 2020 2021 you know don't give away
too much no no i'm not gonna say what it is i'm
not gonna say what it is but it's gonna be a
little adventure that i'm gonna run that i want
to run We're going to try to do it. And I'm very
excited about it. We do plan on doing it after
Crown of the Global King. So about three years
from now. Three years from now. No. How far are
we, Cody? No. Pretty far. We are almost to book
three. Wow. So we're... I think, I'll make a
prediction, I think we're like an in -game area,
right? You're firmly in the mid, vastly approaching
in -game. Because the way I see it is, yeah,
we're going through this dungeon, the Kobold
King and all that, but there is still the town
to deal with. There is a lot of shit going on
in town. There is the corrupt leadership, there
is this... disease or plague or whatever it is
that we completely forgot about. You didn't forget.
You just haven't been back to town in what now
feels like months, but it's really only been
two days. As a player, it's like, oh yeah. I
was thinking about it yesterday. I forgot. There
is something going on. There is a sickness going
on that we haven't solved yet. It's got to be
something to do with that yellow light. Like
it's got to be. Oh, 100%. The yellow light has
to do with the king, the kobold king, whatever,
his crown. Unleashing the backstory that Cody
told us about. Help me. You told us. It's this
undead dude that a lot of people locked up. The
dwarves locked him up. With the seals. Yeah,
there was a seal. Yes. So you remember fine.
I don't need to help you. But I don't remember
his name. Oh, the Whispering Tyrant. Oh, the
Whispering... See, the Whispering Tyrant in Pathfinder
is huge. Massive. He's huge. Massive. And...
He's like the Sauron. Yeah, yeah. We're trying
to keep him at bay. We're trying to keep him
locked up in this... quote -unquote kobold king
is trying to release him from what we know it's
definitely a lot there's a lot going on there's
a lot to figure out very cool i'm having a lot
of fun i'm glad that we're playing what'd you
say i don't even have that in my notes have what
the whispering tyrant oh dude it's from the intro
episode one the pre -intro that you weren't even
here when i recorded it was just me and him sitting
down doing it Well, I mean, there was like, I
would say maybe 10 episodes back. We talked about
it. There was backstory that we learned about
it. But yeah. Anyways, thank you so much, you
guys. Thank you for being patient and understanding.
And if you haven't been, thank you for being
quiet about it. Yeah, exactly. Appreciate it.
It's all that matters. Make sure you leave those
comments. We'll read them on here. Let me know
how you think. Tell a nerd about us. Yeah, that
too. And ask them how they think. That's interesting.
Bye. Hell yeah. Thank you guys. Bye -bye. Bye.
I'll see all of you on TikTok. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Plug, plug, plug, plug. Check out Matt's TikTok.
It's bboytoshio. Check out Ahmad's. youtube it
is bamboo trauma we also have a youtube it is
the curse caravan leave us an email all that
i forgot to say but thank you thank you for being
a traveler on the curse caravan leave comments
goodbye Into an area, you know? Oh, you didn't
get me a Coca -Cola? You didn't ask. Ahmad asked
for a beer. Oh. Don't look at me. Ahmad, he's
my husband. All right? Okay. All right? I just
wanted two chicken nuggets. But Ahmad needed
a beer. Back off. Back off. I need you to back
off, man. No. No, sir. Uh -uh. Don't touch him.
Don't touch him like that. Emon, ew. Emon, get
your hand out of his butthole. Ew, stop. Deeper.
I can take it. No buttholes during my turn. Sorry.
Wait your turn. Me in the butthole.