Last time on Crown of the Kobold King, our heroes recovered from the mechanical Anvil
battle.
They found a dwarven corpse in the room with a mysterious magical gauntlet and Monet tried
it on.
She immediately felt a sharp pain and her hand was forced into a permanent fist.
Everyone learned that the gauntlet was powerful but also cursed.
Our party moved into the next room to discover that it is a place for communicating due to
different areas around the underground forge.
Rootmore listened to a speaker hole and heard a frightened man deep in prayer, the missing
hunter from the first episode.
The group decided to make haste towards him but they were attacked by a shadow creature
in the room.
Our story continues now!
Scarab, from the shadow next to you, you see the head begin to rise.
As it pops out of your shadow, and as its large, almost dwarven shape hovers above you,
it turns its head towards Rootmore and its hand extends out and begins to glow green
before a flashing beam of green light shoots at Rootmore for a 25 to hit.
Oh that hits, your invention sucks!
Did you make that thing out there?
In the front room?
It's stupid, you're lazy!
Rootmore give me a fortitude save.
I don't want to!
Fortitude not bad.
Natural one.
Why did you say that?
I knew you said not bad and you were going to roll so low.
I got a plus 10!
Every time!
Now total, enfeebled four.
And the creature, rather than descending back into the shadow, begins to beckon at Rootmore,
its arms whisping in a come hither motion towards his shadow before you feel that tug
at your feet again and you look down to see your shadow has snapped its feet free from
yours and it stands up next to you.
A fully formed Rootmore shaped shadow.
So handsome!
Oh no!
Do we have two creatures against us now?
Probably.
I don't know.
I'm not sure.
From what you can see there is now the original dwarven shaped shadow and now there is a Rootmore
shaped shadow behind him.
Okay.
I have another idea.
If you got something I just got a gun and I got feet that can run.
I have to roll new initiative for this one moment.
See where he falls in.
It's a hard, how hard do we want a meta game right now?
Somebody do a knowledge check!
On what Rootmore?
On what?
Please speak Rootmore!
If I remember correctly, Scarebird he tried to and it was a religion check so it's for
you to do.
Okay I'll do it on my turn.
God I feel so weak right now.
This hammer is heavy.
I'm going to put it down.
Scarebird, my damage is like the die roll damage plus negative one.
Scarebird, what is your modifier?
For initiative.
For combat initiative it's plus 12.
Okay.
Thank you very much.
Monet, it is your turn.
You see now two shadows before you.
Okay.
Monet would like to cast light on the shadow that just did that to Rootmore.
The shadow unfortunately is not an object and you cannot cast light on non-objects.
That's why I was asking about Rootmore's pants or his chest piece.
There goes my plan.
Although you do note that as the shadow forms it seems to cringe away from the light emanating
off of Rootmore and you can see like thin wispy bits coming off of it as if the light
is affecting it.
Same with the one that did not retreat into the shadows.
They both seem to be very agitated by the presence of light in this room.
Okay.
So are you going to make me lose those two actions for trying to cast light on it?
No.
No I won't.
You would know that you can only do it on...
You're a caster.
You would know what you can and can't do with it.
So then instead, instead, Monet will flank this guy to make him off guard.
Did I say that right?
You did.
And yeah, we'll attempt a two action elemental blast.
Oh yeah, brother.
It's a 15 to hit.
It's a miss.
Even off guard.
Even off guard just only being the one that's a Rootmore.
Okay.
Okay, that's her turn.
Alright.
It's okay.
It is...
It's too handsome to hit.
Ed's turn.
Oh, what about a 16?
I forgot about...
Oh, you're plus one.
That is still not enough.
Okay.
Oh, you're plus one.
Oh, that little thing.
Cody's having fun right now.
Ed Wren is going to repeat his last turn, continuing his courageous anthem.
Send them back into the dark.
And then he's going to fling a sling bullet at the one behind Rootmore, the newly formed
one and he gets a natural 20.
Singing is making me horny.
It's a natural 20.
Yes, finally.
Oh yeah, give me the card.
He's a named boy.
Very good.
Thank you, Felicia.
God damn hero.
That doesn't work.
Okay.
Alright, normal damage.
Until healed, the target is enfeebled too and fatigued.
Oh yes!
Okay, so first of all, let me get damage on that.
That's going to be...
Sling D6 times two.
Nine points of damage.
Yes!
Now, Felicia, what was on that card?
It was enfeebled and what?
And fatigued.
Oh, that's awesome.
It is your turn, Rootmore.
Oh, fantastic.
Still a little...
Divine Lance.
You may have weakened my body, but you can't weaken Taurak!
He shakily tries to hold his hammer as he's weakened and he points the hammer at...
Peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep, peep.
Don't forget your power points.
Very good idea.
Please.
Let's peepy on the beautiful one.
Yes!
Just put it in your lid, all that's used.
Please don't pee on me!
Don't hand me your used peepee.
You're not peeping, Dad.
No, the halfling doesn't deserve it!
Twenty-two to hit.
Don't forget your plus one, all that.
That's extended.
Oh, twenty-three.
Thank you very much.
Twenty-three is a hit.
Fantastic!
Okay, so I'm going to go with the
four and two ones.
Six spiritual damage.
Six spiritual.
Any other traits that thing has?
Attack, cantrip, concentrate, manipulate, sanctified spirit.
Nice.
What does sanctified do?
Let's find out.
It has to do with holy.
I mean, I'm looking at a Reddit right now.
Okay, and how much was it?
Six spiritual damage.
Okay.
You feel like all of that went through.
The shadow seems to shriek and recoil from the light of your holy lance.
Oh, spiritual damage, everyone!
Spiritual!
And he will...
Enrageous Anthem, is that a...
Status bonus.
Holding my breath.
I'm trying to find it because I saw it and it's gone.
Yeah, it's a status bonus.
Oh, plus one to attack and damage.
Did you add that plus one to your damage?
I did not.
Okay.
Thank you so much.
Oh, benevolent DM.
Okay, so guidance will mean nothing right now because guidance is also the same kind
of bonus.
Yeah, screw it.
Let's do some intimidation.
Drill Scar is dead in these places.
Torag will take it back!
Come on.
23 intimidation.
That is just enough to intimidate the shadow.
Yes!
Whoa!
All right, so the one behind you is now what?
Feared one?
Fear one, yeah.
That drops everything by one.
Yes!
That's it for Root Martial.
Good, now he just has, you know, minus two to AC and minus three to hit and damage.
Beautiful.
And it is that shadow's turn.
It will retaliate against the divine magic used against it, attempting to swipe at you
with its clawed hand.
Natural 19, minus two, minus three.
So that's 16.
That is a...
Eve, a 31 to hit.
It's not a crit.
31, not a crit?
No, I got 22 AC.
Beautiful.
I'm just trying to decide if I want to raise that shield or not.
No, no, he's not going to raise the shield.
Okay.
Ten points of spiritual damage.
Yeah.
And it will lash out again, much worse this time.
That's a 16.
Okay.
And it does one more, another 16.
Oh, very good.
Then it is Scarab's turn.
So terrible.
Scarab, use your spiritual damage.
Oh yeah, sure thing, buddy.
Let me just roll deception.
Oh golly.
He might be holy, I don't know.
We should be good after this fight and then we can eat.
Depending on how this fight goes, I don't know, it doesn't seem too good to me.
We gotta just wrap this up all nice and easy and be on our way.
Come on, come on.
Pick me up.
I didn't feel it before, I can walk.
Yeah, that's fine.
Okay.
Scarab will seek action.
The one, well, unless it's showing, the one that's next to him right now.
The original shadow.
That one is showing.
Okay.
I will then Scarab will fire on it.
Any penalty for point blanking?
Nope.
I am.
I have singular expertise.
Wow.
Are you there if y'all holding that scroll of remove curse?
I'm pretty sure we sold it.
Oh, okay.
Did we?
Oh, when you went back to town?
Damn.
I don't know how to get rid of the enfeebled.
It doesn't say in the description.
I'll tell you right now, this enfeebled, you lose one every hour.
Oh, okay.
Thank you, thank you.
Probably shouldn't have told you that?
Probably should have only told you that when you did a knowledge check.
But you know, I'm a nice PM.
I'm gonna say, on my next turn, I'll lose an action.
Nah.
Don't worry about it.
Sure.
You might need it.
Or you might not.
Yeah, because I'll be dead.
Thank you, Cody.
Is there a drawback to firing a one-handed weapon or a gun on somebody?
I don't think so.
Okay, because I'm...
Unless it has the volley trait, then there's no penalty for firing at close range.
Yeah, okay.
So you're talking about like a reactive strike, right?
Well, no, it was just you said...
You asked if I...
I should have awarded that as...
Because it has the volley trait.
Because I didn't think so.
Yeah, because weapons with the volley trait get a penalty to their shots when shooting
a target within 30 feet is the typical.
Or if...
I don't know if your gun had a thing where it's like...
I know ranged attacks.
If you make a ranged attack in melee, you can provoke reactive strikes, but you don't...
You haven't seen this thing reactive strike anything.
Nope, just gonna shoot him.
Shoot her.
It's gonna be a 29 to hit.
And that's the one next to you, right?
Right next to me.
That is a hit.
Hell yeah.
Ah, plus another one.
It's gonna be nine...
Did you add your plus one to that 29?
I just did, yeah.
Okay.
Yeah, I did.
It would have been a 28.
It was a 29.
This damage is gonna be nine piercing magical.
Nine piercing magical.
Very nice.
Scarab will reload and fire again.
21 to hit.
That's a hit.
Yeah, dude.
All the damage we're gonna be having...
Eight piercing magical.
Yeah, dude.
All right, chipping away.
That's it.
That's all the look I got.
As your bullets blow holes through this smoky form that then begin to recoalesce, it regards
you for a moment before turning towards Edgrin and lifting a hand that glows green and it
fires a beam.
Scarab begins blowing.
Stop it!
So he's got a roll to hit Edgrin first.
Edgrin, take cover!
Which he does.
So Edgrin needs a fortitude save.
Ooh, pretty good.
Edgrin succeeds.
So he's only enfeebled one.
Edgrin's getting real lazy with you singing.
And with the creature's third action, it will slink into the shadow and hide.
Let me see if I can get a good hiding symbol.
I'm gonna do this little face.
Oh, he can't shoot me.
I'm gonna do this little face.
Monet.
Monet will attempt to do a two action elemental blast on this...
The one closest to you?
Yeah, the root mora shadow.
That is a 26 to hit.
That is a hit?
Yeah, dude.
Big, big, big.
Eight damage, and then one more elemental blast.
Don't forget to add the extra damage.
Oh, so the other one was nine damage.
Gotcha.
I also forgot to add the plus one to attack.
Is that...
27 wouldn't have mattered.
Oh, you know what?
You're flanking that one, right?
Yeah.
Yeah, 27's a crit.
So pull me additional damage on that one.
Beautiful.
Plus another 10 damage.
Wow, okay.
Whoa.
Huge hit.
Bro.
Okay, and then this one is...
Minus five...
20...
Not a crit.
20...
20 something.
Okay, okay.
More than 20, less than 27?
Yes.
That's a hit.
Okay.
And she deals another 11 damage.
Yes.
Beautiful.
Awesome.
The shadow's edge has become less defined as you strike at it.
It seems harder and harder for itself to pull its wispy smokiness back together.
It is pretty weak.
Nice.
Clearly.
And that is her round.
Well, you know, it's a shadow of Rune Morse.
Rune Morse has those shaky arms.
Barely can hold himself up.
Oh, this armor's so heavy.
Next is Ed.
Have you got any tricks left?
Beautiful singing master.
Has Pig gained the ability to where it can act on its own for one action if you haven't
told it to do anything?
Yes.
But we haven't...
I just haven't been worried about that stuff yet because we haven't gone into the level
up.
But yeah, a couple of things.
Also, I don't want Tricky getting hurt in this fight.
But yes, once there's a...
Yeah, just curious.
I didn't know what level that happened.
Yeah, I just...
Tricky is going to be treated as a mature companion now.
Oh yeah.
Okay.
Edgrin is going to point a finger at Rune Morse's shadow, seeing it in its weakened state.
And he's going to cast Days.
So it's going to make a will save, which it succeeds.
So he will take half damage.
It does not seem to phase the creature at all.
Come on, Edgrin!
This is ridiculous!
It's okay, you're doing fine!
In a panic, he will go ahead and do another courageous anthem to which he sings, I'm trying
my best here!
Sounds great!
Going to be Rune Morse's turn.
So motivated.
Another Divine Lance coming at you.
Let me just stand up real quick.
Oops, can't.
Which one has the lower AC?
The one right behind you.
And it's off guard.
You gotta beat your own A.
Beat yourself.
Let's do another Divine Lance on you.
Toreach Damily!
That might hit.
18?
Plus one, you know, you got the goods.
That's what the plus one.
18 hits.
Oh, fantastic!
Some more spiritual damage.
I'm just pulling this on you.
Eight spiritual damage.
Alrighty.
And then...
I still got it?
Let's swing this hammer!
No!
It's minus five, that's stupid.
He's just sitting on the floor digging through his bag.
Oh, this!
Let's do a recall.
See if we can learn anything else from these things.
You know, we never asked your name.
Go for it.
That'd be religion.
Religion.
17.
Yeah, you're not really sure.
Oh.
These things are stupid.
I don't know.
And that is it for Rootmore's turn.
They're dumb, not me.
If anything's important, I should know about it.
Rootmore, the shadow right behind you lashes out at Monet.
90, 19.
That is going to be a lot.
It's a 34 to hit.
That's a crit.
Okay.
18 points of spiritual damage.
Okay.
How you looking?
You doing okay?
You stumbling?
No, she's fine.
And the creature then begins to gesture, its arms waving in your direction as it tugs at
your shadow and you too feel a pull at your heels as your shadow is starting to be torn
from you.
You are in feebled one.
And for its third action, the creature begins to slink back into the shadows.
Does that provoke?
Probably not.
Nope.
Is not moving, just hiding.
Which makes it Scarab's turn.
So is there another, is there a third shadow now?
No.
It's because I critically failed that fortitude save.
That's why I killed it.
Okay.
Dang-all got wrenched.
Yeah.
You imagine it has to probably tug a couple times, but if there's, oh, you know what?
Yes.
Sorry, that was against free of infuelment.
That's why you went so low.
But yeah, it has to tug a couple times, but you imagine if it tugs enough, it's just going
to rip it free.
Okay.
So Rude Mor was in a sufficiently weakened state to where when it tugged, it just came
off.
Okay.
It's like when you have a restaurant and the server pulls a cloth from the table and all
the glasses and stuff, stay still.
I saw a blooper for the movie The Grinch with Jim Carrey where he went to pull the curtain
from a table and the script was everything was supposed to fall, but he pulled it and
it was perfect.
Nothing fell.
So as an improv, he just walked into the table and knocked it over and they kept it in the
movie.
I think I remember that part.
That's amazing.
That's awesome.
I saw a YouTube short of a little kid doing that and it was like a little boy and his
younger brother and he goes and he does it and he does it perfectly, but when he does
it, his arm whips back and punches his brother in the face.
Okay.
This is what we're going to do.
Damn.
Okay.
Perfect.
I like perfect.
This is what's going to happen.
Yes, Imad, you are correct.
My mount is impressive.
And if I do not choose to do the command an animal action, Tricky will still get one action,
one free action per turn to do something.
And that's what I'm going to do.
Oh yeah, dude.
Tricky get in here.
Tricky is going to run in and flank that first shadow with Scarab and Scarab is going to
do the same.
Remember he is currently hidden though.
Now he's also off guard.
Yes.
I believe I need to reload.
Yeah.
Scarab will reload.
Seek.
Okay.
Roll perception against stealth.
22.
Can't see it.
Fuck.
Fire.
So flat D20.
Yeah.
DC 11 flat check first.
Damn.
Bullet ricochets off the ground.
Well, I guess it would have been a plus one.
23 to hit.
Either way, we're gone.
Now very close, but not quite.
The shadow emerges once more.
And once again, actually as it emerges, it will appear in Edgren's shadow.
And it will strike at him.
That's a crit.
With a 28.
Edgren will take 19 points of spiritual damage.
And he will strike at him.
Still standing at three health, no stamina.
And the creature begins to gesture its arms once again tugging at his shadow.
Oh, and also Edgren is no longer wounded since Rootmoor did a first aid on him earlier.
Thank you.
I'll take that snail off of him.
Oh, is that what that was?
He is enfeebled to now.
That is it for the creature's turn.
It has not hidden itself.
And it is Monet's turn.
Get it.
Kill it.
Come on.
So Monet is a liminal Kyle Fetchling.
It's no time for backstory.
Which means that she actually...
For her to hit something that is concealed instead of a 9, it is an 11.
That's why I was doing that earlier and then it didn't become a thing because they stopped
hiding.
But yeah, I remembered that she had something like that.
So you get a bonus plus two against concealed targets.
Beautiful.
That's cool.
Because she is from the shadows.
That makes sense.
You are of shadow.
So she's just going to attempt to hit the one in front of her.
Okay, give me that.
You'll say it's a DC 11, but you get the plus two.
Well, it's...
I mean, sure.
Either way, it just says the DC instead of being 11 is 9.
Cool.
That works.
16.
Okay.
Roll to hit.
Unnatural, too.
4 and 8.
Nope.
That one is a miss.
Can she try one more time?
Same deal.
DC 9 and then...
No.
Nope.
Double miss.
Slippery creatures.
I mean, I didn't necessarily...
I didn't say that she did a two action one, but I would have done a two action one if
I...
I would...
I mean, she's been doing two action elemental blast for the first one.
So if I had hit, I would have said I meant to do that as a two action one.
I got you.
So you're being fair and saying that was your three.
Which makes it Edgrin's turn next.
He is severely injured and he is going to listen to you guys.
First he's going to attempt to run away.
Where's your speed, mister?
Yep, 25 feet away and then for his second action he's going to cast Soothe on himself.
Hell yeah.
And so he's going to get 1d10 plus four hit points back.
So he regains seven HP and that is his turn and it will go to Rootmoore.
Edgrin!
I'm coming!
And Rootmoore is going to run 20 feet towards Edgrin and adjacent to the shadow that was
harassing him.
And he's going to use an ability he picked up at level four called Encouraging Words.
You gonna make the shadow feel better?
Hey, not the shadow.
Forgot this party.
Hey pal.
Edgrin, stay strong!
I'm proud of you, my sweet boy!
Oh, Mr. Rootmoore!
19 plus eight, what is that, 27?
And DC 15.
Critical.
So that's a 2d8 stamina points.
Oh wow.
Hell yeah.
God damn it.
Three stamina points!
Better than nothing.
Oh god, man, I rolled a two and a one.
Hurt, hurts, hurts.
Well, shit.
It's the thought that counts.
Anyway, we're going to...
You, you, you nasty shadow!
What are you?
What are you, Droskar?
You're dead, stupid!
He's going to use intimidation on this.
Is this the same one that I intimidated earlier?
It is not.
Okay.
Oh.
So, 29.
Intimidation.
Against its 22 will DC is a success.
Okay.
Dang, harsh words!
I'm gonna write those down for later!
Yeah.
So, it's Frightened One, and that's Rootmoore's turn.
That hurt my feelings.
I feel stupid!
I don't know what symbol to use for Frightened.
Alrighty.
Up next is Rootmoore's Shadow, and it's going to swing at you, Monet, for a 30.
That's a hit.
There's one that's screaming.
It's a man.
He's got his hands on either side of his head, and he's screaming.
You should do that one instead.
It's the bottom round.
Oh, you can scroll.
I didn't even realize I could fucking scroll.
Oh, shit!
Yeah, you can scroll the symbols.
Thank you.
That's way better.
Okay.
Very good, Felicia.
She should get a PowerPoint for that.
You know what?
I'll write you a presentation later.
Yeah, I had no idea you could scroll.
Yay!
Technical point.
Screaming.
Sorry, that is a 28 to hit because it is still getting a minus 2 from its... what was that?
Its enfeebled condition.
So, 28 hits?
Yeah, that hits.
Okay.
And he's going to get a minus 1, 2 damage, meaning you take seven points of spiritual
damage.
Okay.
Seven spiritual.
For his second action, he begins tugging on your shadow.
Once again, you go up one more enfeebled to enfeebled to.
I don't consent.
That's a shame.
You are enfeebled to.
And for his third action, he will hide in the shadows.
And he is no longer afraid.
And it is Scarab's turn.
Funny if that was a rule.
I don't consent.
Oh, sorry.
Never mind.
No damage.
My bad.
I don't want to push your boundaries like that.
I don't want to be human comfortable.
So we'll just leave this.
Alright, we're out of combat.
I had initiative.
Remastered edition.
You can hold up the I'm not comfortable card.
Oh, really?
Three action Pig Tricky is going to quickly walk up to Scarab.
Scarab will mount Tricky for an action.
Get a room, Jews.
The shadow in front of Rootmore is showing.
Correct.
So yeah, one action, mount.
Second action, reload.
Third action, fire upon that one.
And it's frightened though.
It's frightened, but I rolled a two for a 15 to hit.
That's a miss.
Damn.
That's it.
Don't forget that Rootmore is glowing with bright light.
I haven't forgotten.
I feel so confident right now.
And now it's the shadow in front of Rootmore's turn.
Rootmore, he's going to move.
Actually no, sorry.
He is going to cast a spell.
So if you would like to be a little reactive on that, you can.
Let me check my reactions.
See what I have.
I'm sure that's all I can do.
But no, he's not.
He's not going to do it.
Okay.
So this is a shadowy hand that fires a beam of green light over your shoulder.
And does a 25 hit you, Monet?
It does.
Then give me a fortitude save.
I'll give you one of my PP's.
Hell yeah.
Do you have the other PP?
Yep.
You should use the other one instead.
Yeah, because this one will stay.
That one gets reset.
Oh.
You can just set that aside and take this back.
Oh.
Okay.
Because if you don't need a second one, the next session you'll have two.
But if you use that one, you only have one next session.
29.
Yes.
That is almost a critical.
You are enfeebled one more, which puts you at three?
Two.
Two?
I've got you beat.
I've got twice as many.
Did the shadow hit you last turn and give you an enfeebled one?
Had you been hit before that one?
No.
Okay.
So it wasn't you that got crit?
It was her that got crit.
She got crit the first time she got crit.
Okay.
So you're just then enfeebled two now.
Yeah.
Okay.
Cody, has it been an hour yet?
Can I drop an enfeebled?
It has not.
It's been like three minutes.
Not even in real time.
Not even three minutes.
It's been like 40 seconds.
Not even.
I'm done with this.
This is silly.
You walked in the room and you sloped on the floor.
It's been four seconds.
For its next action, it is going to claw at you, Rootmore.
MAP.
Uh-oh.
That's a 21 to hit.
Wait a second.
Get the fuck out of here.
Let me just lift this thing.
Even against your enfeebled AC?
It doesn't affect AC.
Almost got him there.
I've got enfeebled.
I've got courageous anthem.
That's all I am is enfeebled for.
It's just my attack rolls and...
That's it.
Only enfeebled for.
Yes, it's not bad.
Then it is now Monet's turn.
You can't enfeeble Tora.
Monet is going to try and take a strike at the one in front of her again.
Okay.
This one is still hidden, so give me that DC nine for you check.
Easy.
I rolled an eight.
That is a miss and the action is lost.
Can you try one more time?
Easy.
You got this shit.
Don't fucking speak to natural one.
Why do you do that?
You're cursing it.
You cursed it.
This is the second time this session that you've cursed it with that.
Don't speak on my rolls.
Promise?
No, I can't promise.
Why not?
It's like the opposite of a swagger.
It's all I've asked.
That's all I ask of you is don't speak on my rolls.
Promise?
No, I don't promise.
You can't make a promise like that.
Because if I promise, what if I accidentally speak, then I broke promise.
The promise I can't keep.
I'm not asking root more.
I'm asking Emma don't speak on my rolls.
Oh, root border.
Emma is speaking through root.
Oh my God.
Whatever.
My round's over.
My round is over.
Emma doesn't make a promise.
At least it's not a crit fail because it wasn't an attack roll.
Yes.
And it will go to Edwin who will continue to run.
I will try not to be so positive.
Especially since it's not his name.
It's Ed Grin.
You cursed it twice tonight.
Your roll and my roll.
Welcome to the cursed curse.
I don't care.
All of you are cursed just by being in the same room as me.
So, fucking deal.
How would you like it if I stood up and went fail fail on your die because that's what
it feels like.
Probably not.
That's what it feels like when you're like, oh, easy.
And you know, I see you sitting there with your silly little grin being like, I hope
it's a fail because I said it's easy.
I know your face, Emad.
Ed Grin runs 70 feet away.
Nice.
You're throwing the curses.
Yes.
Run by run.
And now it is Rootmore's turn.
Monet, hang in there.
Five, 10, 15, 20, 25, exactly 30 feet.
Let's do some encouraging words to Monet.
Monet, stop being so negative.
Six plus eight.
Fourteen.
Fuck.
Felled it by one.
Do you get guidance on that?
Or not guidance, sorry.
If you look over at Monet, her eyes look just a little darker than normal and they almost
look shadowy themselves.
She's like, shut up, Rootmore.
Shut up.
Let's see.
I want to see if I can do it again.
I'm just trying to see if there's something that says you can't.
If you fail, is the target unaffected for the next hour?
There's no fail.
Yeah, you're immune until you take a breather or rest for the day, so I can't do it again.
I kind of like it.
It makes sense.
Shut up.
I don't want your encouraging goddamn words.
All right.
Is that what they're calling short rest now?
It's a breather?
That's what it looks like.
Take a breather?
That's what it says.
I like it.
It makes sense.
Is this silly?
Take a breather.
Not short rest, long rest.
It's now until you take a breather or rest for the day.
Hell yeah, Paizo.
Preparing spells is just hanging out.
We're just hanging out.
We're hanging out.
Hold up.
I need to take a breather.
I'm just going to chill for a bit.
Get a 20 minute chill.
Anything else from you, Rootmore?
Yes.
Two more actions.
We're going to do another divine lance on this pooh-pooh man in front of me.
Well, let me see.
Yeah, the one in front of Rootmore is frightened, right?
No longer.
His turn has passed.
What about the one in front of Monet?
Hidden.
Okay.
So we're going to go for the one.
And he's also enfeebled to and fatigued one.
Okay.
So we're going to go for the one right in front of Rootmore with a divine lance.
21 to hit.
That's a hit?
Yes, baby.
Five spiritual damage.
Okay.
Come on.
It seems unaffected.
Oh, fuck.
I thought I was weak to it.
Okay.
That's it for Rootmore.
He's all done.
Alrighty.
And that makes it the Rootmore spawns turn.
That one will strike at Monet.
25.
That's a hit.
Have you done the divine lance on this one?
14 points of spiritual damage.
Or just your shadow.
I don't know.
Just, I think it was just my shadow.
It's the first time I'm attacking this one, I think.
Monet cries out in pain and is rocking on her feet.
Next the creature will move next to Tricky and will attempt to strike at Tricky.
Scarab is on Tricky, by the way.
Then it'll swing at you.
This time for a 27.
A melee attack?
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, it's a hit.
12 points of spiritual damage.
And it's your turn, Scarab.
Dang it.
So Monet is like real bad.
Mm-hmm.
Rootmore?
How bad is he looking?
Oh, just dandy.
Are you lying?
No!
Okay.
You're just super enfeebled.
Gosh, what's that move?
The shadow in front of you is no longer concealed.
Yeah.
Kill it!
Just kill it!
Yeah, but...
Don't worry about Monet!
I'll help her!
I mean, that wasn't in the question.
I can't do, I can't help her.
I can just like try to kill this guy.
Kill it!
Scarab's going to reload and fire at the fella in front of him.
Rootmore's ghost.
I hope for the best.
Sexy bastard.
Ooh, a 17 on the die.
Are we still being affected by the bard's song?
No.
Okay.
Because he did not cast it before he left.
29 to hit.
That is a critical crit.
Yeah, dude!
Yes!
Does deadly affect it?
Go for it.
Or is it affected by deadly?
It is not not affected by deadly.
Okay.
Apologies, hold on one sec.
It is immune to precision damage.
What if it's magical precision?
It is still immune to precision.
So the bonus damage from critical hits, I don't believe applies.
It's immune to banana damage.
What if it's a green banana?
It's still a banana.
Well, because if it's immune to piercing, because if it's immune to piercing, period,
I'm going to stop wasting bullets.
Not piercing.
I'm just being an asshole.
That's all, I'm sorry.
Normally, like when you do like a sneak attack, sneak attacks damage is considered precision
damage.
I don't know if critical damage is considered the same or not.
I don't think so.
I think critical damage is just more of the same damage type.
Probably.
So I think your deadly is fine.
Oh yeah, dude.
And Rootmore, I apologize earlier.
I said that it was unaffected by your five damage that is not the case.
It does take the five damage.
Oh, thank you.
It's going to be 32 damage.
Wow.
Jesus.
As your bullet rips through the shadow, it does as much as it did before where a great
hole appears in its form.
And you remember seeing it recoalesce over that.
But this time, the hole you leave blows a massive hole through the chest of the Rootmore
like shadow and it looks down before the shadow seems to fall and dissipate.
Yeah, dude.
Damn.
Okay.
Murder town.
Final action reload.
Rootmore, hold on!
You hold on.
I'm fine.
You look great, buddy.
And it is the shadow's turn.
Hope this fight ends quickly.
My bladder is going to explode.
It will swing at you, Rootmore.
Oh, good.
28 to hit.
Oh, fuck.
That's a hit.
Seven points of spiritual damage.
And it goes to pull at your shadow realizing that you do not have one anymore.
And so in its confusion, it will swing at you again and it will miss with a 15.
And for its final action, it will slink into the shadows of the corridor.
Whatever.
Monet.
Monet will pull out a potion.
Uncork it.
Trink it.
Fancy water.
So clear and good.
Healing seven.
I don't know if we've ever used that.
I think that's the first time we've used it.
I think we have.
I'm sure we have.
You say that like it was the perfect place to use it.
No, I think we drank potions, but I forgot to hit that drum.
And move.
I don't think we used it.
Listener, please tell us.
Have you ever heard that sound before?
Yeah, and tell us if you want to hear it again.
And we might have played it in like an outtakes at the very end of the episode, but that doesn't
count.
We actually use it in an episode.
Please comment.
Let us know.
And if you don't like it, let us know and I'll make him or delete it.
Fancy water.
I mean, I think that.
That's it.
Okay.
Next.
But you still stand.
Yeah, for now, you still stand.
Edwin.
And I'm going to go ahead and remove Ed from initiative as you can no longer see him.
Goodbye, Edwin.
Run.
Ed grid.
Edward.
Both of you.
Damn it.
Come on.
It's infectious.
He made me say it.
I've been doing the Rootmore impression for too long.
Okay.
And so moving on, we go to Rootmore.
Oh, great.
Scurrup.
Hang in there.
You hang in there.
I'm fine.
I'm going to do encouraging words.
Oh, there we go.
17 plus eight.
What is that?
26.
That is a crit.
2D8 stamina points.
We got an eight and we got out of the die.
Out of the roller.
Eight plus six.
14 stamina points.
That's crazy.
Must be nice.
You can't.
Yes, I can.
Cast heal.
Two action heal.
Not that.
What is it?
D8.
You're at range touch.
Can you do the one if you're in it?
Yeah, but the two action one is 16 plus 2D8.
Okay.
Pretty good.
21 healing.
And that's just HP.
Unfortunately, it doesn't do stamina.
Man, that's fine.
Good, good.
Puts her back up to full health.
That is it for Rootborn.
And that makes it Scarab's turn.
Down to one.
She was down to one HP.
Are you serious?
Bro, and you're running in there to fight.
Well, she took a potion, so she was at eight.
Still, you're a monster.
I don't know why you didn't.
Trying to spread things around.
I expected you to because it was just going after her and hit her.
Well, you didn't pick up the wounded conditions.
That's cool.
Five times in a row.
You gotta pee so fucking bad.
Me too.
Let's see what happens right here.
Okay, Tricky.
Scarab pulls his gun up, reloads it, grabs onto the rough of Tricky's neck, and we're
going to use a new ability.
What is it?
I'm pretty sure you reloaded at the end of your turn.
Did I?
Because I...
I'm pretty sure I hit the reload button at the end of your turn.
Okay, if so.
I felt like I fired as my final action.
But if you didn't, I could be very wrong.
Don't take my word.
Because I killed the dude.
Yeah.
You did fire, for sure.
I just don't know if you...
I think that was the last thing.
Damn it.
I don't know.
I could have dang sworn.
Ow!
I'm sorry, I'm throwing a wrench and shit.
Do your turn.
Let's assume you hadn't, so you can just reload.
Fuck it.
Yeah, because it was Mount Tricky, reload, fire.
Reload, fire, killing the thing, reload.
Hold on, Rootmore!
And now...
Is Mounting Tricky in action?
Yes.
Okay.
Should be.
Yeah, let's do something fun and new.
Scarab is going to grab onto the scruff of Tricky's neck.
Grrr.
And shout, ya, ya!
Grrr.
Get him.
Tricky and Scarab take off like mad.
They will be striding twice.
For a total of 70 feet.
Whoa!
But halfway through that stride, this is a two action move.
Halfway through that stride, Scarab's going to hold his gun in his left hand and just
aim it right at the head of this shadowy creature as they're running by.
Holding it sideways like a gangster.
You bet your ass he is.
Oh my god.
And hopefully will hit.
Do you want to halfway through the movement, stop here behind the shadow and take an attack against it?
Dude, if you would allow that, that'd be sick.
It's halfway through your movement.
Dude, so you can like move and attack while you're moving, dude.
I can, yeah.
Ugh.
Even with a ranged, within my, anywhere within my weapon's first range increment, I can do
two strides and attack.
Oh my god.
I'm so excited for this.
Is this like a cavalier thing?
God dang, man, I, oh, I'm jealous.
I love it.
Not a great roll.
Who gives a shit?
I know it's awesome.
I hope it works.
Oh my god.
I'm just thinking of the future, how awesome that's going to be.
Oh, 16 against your, your off guard.
It's not a hit.
No.
Yeah.
As a, as he fires and misses, he's going to scream.
I have to see if Edwin's okay.
I'm fine.
Infection.
Hell yeah.
So they just blast past you guys and slam against the wall in the other room.
Very good.
Quickly.
You said you guys were totally okay.
That's why I didn't do anything when I ran by.
Tell them that we've already cleaned up out here.
It's fine.
You just be mounted by a shadow.
Don't speak for me.
Tell them that more days I've been troubled, but I'm totally fine.
Oh, and I could use encouragement.
I didn't know you were a liar.
What do you want me to do?
I'm feeble.
I'm in feeble four.
You know how much energy it's taking to yell.
You feebly little liar.
I just lost my next turn from talking too much.
You feebly little liar.
Rube more shadow swings at you.
Why?
Cause you're right in front of it.
Oh, okay.
For 33.
Glad I saved the reaction cause Rube more will raise his shield to make that not a crit.
Nice.
10 points of spiritual damage.
One more swing coming at you, Monet.
Natural one.
Yes.
Hell yeah.
You're going to blow it.
I can do that.
In the shadows frenzy, it strikes itself.
Nice. Nice. Nice.
What a dumb ass.
Dealing 11 points of spiritual damage.
The shadows own claws seem to rake its gaseous form and you can see that it leaves lasting marks within its own body.
As it takes 11 points of spiritual damage.
Beautiful.
Love to see it.
Yes.
Nice. Good.
What an idiot.
And just like the shadow before it, the edges of it begin to blur and it seems as if it is struggling to maintain its form.
Monet, it's going to swing at you one last time at a big penalty.
15?
No, that's a miss.
And it is your turn.
As its shadowy arm weakly flails in your direction.
Okay.
Monet is going to attempt a two action elemental blast.
That is a 19 to hit.
19 does not hit.
Pardon?
19 is not a hit.
I mean, you are punching shadows.
She'll give it another go.
What did I get on? Flank it.
That would have been a really good idea.
It's okay.
That was a miss.
Monet just saying that in the hallway.
That would have been a really good idea.
My first thought was I'm going to flank it on my turn, but I realized it's up against the wall.
Yes.
I can't walk through walls.
You can walk through Monet.
Very true.
Now is your chance.
You can also walk through shadows.
Oh, I see what you're saying as far as that goes.
Yes.
Flank it with yourself if you're fast enough.
Power gamer.
Move and then shove Monet over and then get behind.
Which hand am I going to hit you with?
I'm over here.
I'm just doing a distraction.
Divine lance on this poo poo man.
22 to hit.
That's a hit.
Yes.
If you roll high enough, you could kill it.
Three, four spiritual damage coming at you right now as soon as I can do math.
Four spiritual damage.
Throw two ones in a tube.
Yeah.
Kill the beast.
And you kill the shadow.
And that's it for today.
Jesus Christ.
Fucking.
You're telling me that Rube Moore's shadow had a plus 13 to hit, bro?
No, he had a plus 15 to hit.
That's fucked up.
Yeah, it makes sense.
Plus 15.
Wow.
That's fucked up.
Shadows be bad.
We can talk about it post-up if you want.
Yeah, you're rolling like shit.
I did on some of them.
Yeah, I know.
I'm pretty sure I hit every single first attack because of that plus 15.
I'm saying every hit wasn't a crit.
That's what I'm saying.
I crit Monet like twice.
Yeah.
But that doesn't count.
She's poorly built.
That's what Emma's saying even though she has 22 AC just like Rube Moore.
23 AC.
Oh, even more than Rube Moore.
Oh fuck.
24 with the shield.
Okay.
The last one I rolled, he only had a plus five on the last hit, which is why he rolled
a 15 on an 80-10.
The Cursed Caravan uses trademarks and or copyrights owned by Paizo Inc.
used under Paizo's Community Use Policy, paizo.com slash community use.
We are expressly prohibited from charging you to use or access this content.
I say this to myself in the shower.
The Cursed Caravan is not published, endorsed, or specifically approved by Paizo.
For more information about Paizo Inc. and Paizo products, visit paizo.com.
I suppose you say, well, you're holding your junk.
You are not permitted to use this.
The Cursed Caravan theme music and the beat you're hearing now is written by our very own Matthew.
We would like to thank Michael Guelphi Studios, the world reference for tabletop RPG audio for the music and the ambiance.
You can find out more at michaelguelphi.com.
That's what I tell myself in the shower.
Check out the description for the spelling.
Check out their Patreon and YouTube links in the description.
Leave us a comment. Rate us five stars on all of the podcast carriers.
All of them, please press like.
We see everyone leaving five stars and that is amazing.
Please tell your friends, tell people you work with, tell your fucking enemies who gives a shit.
We need your help. Maybe tell your enemies to give us a one star.
So then they're like, they're like, man, fuck you.
I'm giving this podcast a five star.
All right. I see where you're going with that.
I started saying disregard Felicia's comment.
But yes, whatever you can do to manipulate your enemies to give us five stars, please.
We need your help. Manipulate your enemies.
We spend a lot of our free time cleaning this up, editing.
And it's hard for us to get together and do this.
I mean, you guys know people that play this.
One of the hardest things about playing a game like this is just finding the time to do it.
And we appreciate everything that you guys give us.
We are also on YouTube. Go watch it. Press like.
Thank you for being a traveler on the cursed caravan. Bye bye.
And don't forget to check out Amod's OnlyFans and send him an email. Thanks, you guys.
I don't have or visit his home address or write him a letter as was described in the episode.
Thanks. Bye bye. Bye.
Whatever. Bamboo trauma. Bamboo trauma.
I do have to pee. It's getting dangerous. I'll be back.
Well, that means that I have to pee too.
That's so cute.
Well, I'm not going to wait for him to pee.
No, go pee. Go.
I'm going to think about him peeing while I'm sitting still.
Looks like it's just you and me.
It would appear so.
You want to list off all of Amod's personal details?
Yeah. So Amod lives at 6579 Chivalry Street in Fort Worth, Texas. Area code 73461.
And his phone number is 940-863-3842.
So if you want to text him or send him a letter or if you just want to show up at his house and say hi, feel free to do that.
Yeah, yeah. And his email address is emama1538 at yahoo.com.
So feel free to send him an email talking about how cool you think he is and how mad you are at him for making me roll a net one on my head by cursing me.
Or send him an email to send him your favorite recipes. He loves food. You know, like maybe send him an email for like a nice thing. Maybe don't be a goblin.
You can also check out his OnlyFans at PapaBear94.
Yeah, that'd actually be really great if you guys did that. He just got started.
And yeah, you know, it's a new thing. It would be great if the people of our community would go and support him.
Absolutely. I mean, he just spent all that money on all those toys. It's time that they got some use, you know. Well, I mean, some use on camera.
Yeah. I mean, they've already gotten the use on camera.
He got a, you see the really big one?
No, I don't want to see them. It's like eight different colors. I mean, I support him in his sex work. I support sex workers, but I do not want to see Emma's toys.
But I mean, y'all should. I just don't. I don't even know how one man can sit on so much.
Why am I here so long? You said that today. Say tomorrow. Huh? Say it again tomorrow. OK, I'm sorry.
David, I need to know that there's progress.