Welcome to Fit To Be Real. And a little extra.
I'm Victoria. Hey guys, I'm Carly. And I'm Carmela.
She's gonna think that she has to yell like she
does on FaceTime. Carly, that's what you do.
That's 100 % what you do every single time. I'm
always like, why are you yelling? We've never
had Carmela on the YouTube. No. And I'm in control.
I'm not sure where I'm supposed to look. There
or there? There. Everywhere. I'm in control of
her microphone, so if her answers are taking
too long, I have the ability... She will cut
me off. ...to take it away. We like to talk over
each other, so this isn't going to go well. But
it's going to happen. Especially with two mics.
And three people. But also remember... You need
to talk into them. Maybe don't talk until microphones
in front of your face. Right. Right. Right. Right.
But also be quick on the reflex. OK. You go.
I go. You go. I go. Carly basically. Oh, yeah.
That was cute. Carly basically texted this morning
and said, are we doing this? What are we talking
about? We'll have mom on. Hey, mom. I was like,
I'll be there. And I said, what are you going
to ask me? I'm afraid of. some of their questions.
So she said the studio and then that's safe.
All right, I need to know what questions you're
afraid of. Pre -kids life. Mom, we would never
ask you about Studio 54. We already did that.
Okay, good. And you know, deep heavy thoughts.
Yeah, we don't like deep heavy thoughts with
you. I have deep heavy thoughts. You're gonna
all understand Carly a little bit more today.
I do have deep heavy thoughts, but nobody ever
asks. Because you're apparently afraid of them.
No, I'm not afraid of them. You just said you're
afraid of them. Well, I don't want to tell the
world. For the first time, if I'm verbalizing
them, I don't want the world to find out. For
the last time, the world is not listening to
this podcast. One never knows. One never knows.
Just all the people you know, that's all. I used
to be deep. Okay, hold on. Microphone girl has
to be facing her. She's... I used to be deep.
I did. I liked deep poems. Drink every time she
says deep. Drink every time we don't know what's
going on and you're a little confused about where
the conversation's going. Okay. I don't think
I... I have nothing to say. Okay, we'll ask you
some questions. How about that? Good. Okay. Don't
talk unless you have a microphone in front of
you, okay? No, you're talking. It's like if we
had Dean here. No, Dean was really good. Was
he? This might be one you all want to watch.
This might be the day that you tune into YouTube
and not just listen to this in your ears. Oh
boy. Okay. So just shush for a second. So you
know that we are in our 15th year of C -Fit,
but what you might not know is that Miss Carmela
here is in her 30th year of Carmela's Dance Studio,
and 30 is a very large number, and one that came
out of nowhere. Damn. It's a deep number. It's
a deep number. Yeah, it's a deep number. And
we did not realize, I guess I can't say we, I
think. I didn't know, until Christina said it.
In August, she said, what are we going to do
for your 30th anniversary? I said, who's what?
A anniversary for what? She said, it's been five
years since your 25th. Not a great representation
of good business work. But it's true. 30 is a
huge number and it's a deep number and something
that's... I mean, how many businesses do you
know that have been around for 30 years? Ah.
There's no right answer. There's no wrong answer.
She said, if you want to quote this, ah. Just.
I'm trying to think. I don't know. Okay. There's
no, yeah, there's no, this wasn't a trick question.
Woolworths? No, Woolworths is closed. Woolworths
is closed. Strawberges? Woolworths? Strawberges
is closed. Sears is closed. Clovers? Clovers
are closed. Ah. Value City? Value City's closed.
Wow, you're up on these franchises? Carmela's
dancing. Clines, Corvettes, they're all closed.
Stop yelling. And all you people who are watching
have no idea what the name of these stores are.
But if anybody's my age, they would know. Yeah,
your age isn't watching. No. But we are here.
They can't figure out YouTube. We are here to
ask our moms some questions about her business
and what it's like to own a business for 30 years
because knock on wood, uh, we will. Yep. There
you go. We will have see fit for 30 years at
some point. If our bodies are still standing,
my mom's shaking her head. No, I won't be lasting
that long, but your bodies are not going to make
it 30 years. I'm telling you right now, you work
too long and too hard to keep it up for another
15 years. Great. So our business is going down.
Tell me more. No, you're already working for
five people. Oh my, says the person who has worked
seven days a week for the past 30 years. Okay.
So having said that, we're going to ask you some
questions. We're going to ask you to reflect.
So I'm going to preface this mom with it's whatever
comes to your head first. That would be the right
answer. don't think too hard about it okay but
also i can't edit this why there's no she said
why why because i don't know how to edit the
youtube video so if you say something you would
like me to cut out oh my gosh i can't all right
i have to be fair This is where you should be
nervous. So take back what I said and think about
what you say before you say it. You have 50 -50
option. It's up to you. All right, here's the
first question, because it's taken us 10 minutes
to get here. This one's a hard hitter. What's
the most valuable lesson you learned that you
didn't know in your first five years? So what
have you learned in the past 25? 25. You can
hold it yourself. Oh my gosh. The first five
years, uh, I, I, the last, the last 25 years,
I had learned that. And that's what I learned.
Perfect. Amazing. Moving on. Moving on. Okay.
Well, okay. That was a great answer. And, uh,
Yup. Tough question. Yeah. Okay. What are you
most proud of looking back over the last 30 years?
Take a moment. No, I do know what I'm proud of.
I'm proud of the fact that both of you are extremely
awesome dance teachers, extremely awesome dance
teachers, not only dancers, but I watch their
classes and I'm blown away. It's like the teachers
become the student and the student has become
the teacher. Number two, I'm very proud of the
fact that I'm teaching third generation, second
and third generations now. And I love that. I
love that. I look at these little faces and I
see their mothers 10 years ago, 15 years ago.
And that really warms the cockles of my heart.
You're gonna wanna view YouTube. I pulled the
microphone. I pulled the microphone away and
she brought her head with it. So that I pushed
her head back. So she was looking at the ceiling
and the microphone was in her lap and she just
continued to speak. So the third thing that I
The third thing that I noticed that I'm proud
We hope you have some time today because this
is not something that's gonna go by quickly 20
minutes The third thing that I was proud of I
am proud of is that we're still open 30 years
later and that I can still meet people in the
store or the street and remember their names.
And they don't remember me. That's not true.
I can remember their, almost I can remember the
dances they did or the costumes they wore in
the recitals. And I just love the fact that my
staff teaches the love of dance without intimidation
and... Except for Carly. I think you should watch,
observe my glasses more often. And that's what
I'm proud of. I'm proud of the fact that we're
still getting the generations up to love dance,
to love dance. And it's a springboard if they
want it to be. Good job. Very good answer. We
gotta cut you off. We need music. I think she
thinks she's answering these as fast as possible
because somebody else is gonna hit the buzzer
and chime in as well. But that's her life. She
talks as if someone's going to stop her talking.
Because nobody ever listens to me. Oh my god.
I have to talk quickly to get my ideas out. It's
the best when she's like yeah yeah yeah this
is what I have to say. Okay, all good answers.
There's nothing... Wait, she just looked at me
and went, it's true. But it wasn't on the microphone.
Nothing she says today is wrong, because this
is all her opinion. I'm going to ask you one
more from this little section. If you could go
back and start over today, how or would you do
anything differently? Oh, oh. I know, I know,
I know. do differently. I like the location of
my studio, but I would like it to be just a little
bit bigger, physically. Not mentally. The physicality
of the studio. The physicality of the studio.
I kept trying to make it bigger and bigger. I
took the staircase out. I took the music camera,
grabbing it out. I, you know, tried to make it
bigger. Also, I... It's okay, Mom. No one's on
fire. No one's on fire. I would clean out the
basement. Oh my God, you're the same person.
Both of you are the same. Both of you are the
same. I would clean that. Well, I think she lived
with me for a while. To be fair, I have cleaned
out that basement twice. It was my summer job.
I did it once by myself. Didn't do a great job.
I did. And then she messed it up again. And then
Andrew and I did it one year. She's saying, yeah,
she agrees. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So if you could
do it differently, you would have wanted a bigger
space. Yes, but in the same location. So everything
else is fantastic. Uh, yes. So you think you're
pretty? Yes. Slap me with the pink spotlight
and I'll be pretty. Mom, that's a mean girl's
quote, but okay, whatever you think. Wait, what
were you quoting? Another old Diva movie, but
I don't even know. Love those old Diva movies.
Slap me with the pink spotlight and I'll be pretty.
Wow, you stuttered both times you said it. Wait
a minute, what I would change. This is, you think
this is about the studio, this episode, this
is about ADHD. This whole episode is a lesson
on ADHD. I think, no, I think I would pay people
more. I think I would like to change that too.
We can do that now. That is something you're
in control of. Okay, you don't have the microphone,
you can't talk. I love that after 30 years. Everyone's
getting a raise. I would like to pay people more.
Same. Okay, all right, next one. I would love
to hear this answer. I don't know if we're gonna
get an honest answer here because I didn't give
her these questions ahead of time, so she had
no time to think about it. Wow, we couldn't tell.
But what is the biggest hidden challenge in running
a business for 30 years that you didn't know
that you would come across? I know what I think
it is. Do you want me to say what I think it
is? Yes, yes. I think... I'm sorry, is there
a problem? Bad interviewer, but keep going. Oh,
I know what it is. Okay, go ahead. I think running
a business and raising children at the same time,
is that what your thing was? No. But that was
hard. That was hard way back when because it
was hard because I had to do my schedules around
who I know what I would like. You had to do your
schedules around. I had to do my schedules around
my three children's schedules and then still
make everybody happy. What was your other? Challenge?
Did you say challenge? You cut yourself off to
think of another hidden challenge. Didn't finish
that sentence and then said I don't remember
what the second one was. I think we found the
challenge, guys. And this is why Vicki keeps
me grounded, because Vicki is the one who says
focus, and I focus. Or at least I try. I forget
what the question was. Okay, so the question
was... I'm scared. What was your hidden challenge
in the past 30 years that you didn't think you
would have to face? I like the children one.
Yeah. In my... Yeah, we're afraid of the children.
In my opinion, for my business, I just miss a
lot of things for the kids. My mom never, that
I remember, missed anything. She never missed
anything. What I think the hidden challenge would
have been would be dealing with... Different
situations with parents because when you open
a dance studio, you think you're teaching kids.
That's all you're doing But I think there's so
many challenges that when you teach kids that
the parent that come along with parents I would
have never thought about that. Okay, so I agree
with you. I I didn't miss anything because kids
weren't as active as they are now All of you
play. We were so boring. Wait a minute. No, all
of you played a sport, but it had a fall sport,
a winter sport and a spring sport during this
during the school year. Now they're on three
fall sports, three winter sports and three. Plus
they want to dance. I have to tell you when I
go to dance teaching conventions. You don't need
to. No, I want to tell you when I would go to
dance teaching conventions, I listen to the dance
teachers and all they do is complain about the
parents, the parents, the parents. And I sit
there and my parents are awesome. My parents
are so supportive. I can name maybe on one hand
five parents who yelled at me. Did you just look
at your hand and count your fingers? Right enough
was four or five. But I can count five parents
that gave me a hard time in 30 years. I can count
more. I can count more. Can count some more and
those parents aren't listening to this podcast
mom, so you're good Well, I I know the five parents
that I remember like that I can name right now
So my parents were not a challenge at all, but
the kids activities now That's the challenge
because I'm already getting my child can't do
that weekend because of this. Can you put her
around? every sport Everything is an activity,
and that's what's the challenge to the teachers.
Attendance. Attendance is a challenge. Yeah.
You win, Mom. You win. You got it. You got it
all in. You got it in faster than all of the
others. I don't know if I'm right or not. No,
that was the right answer. That was the right
answer. Attendance. Attendance. She's saying
over and over. Attendance. Do you have a tick?
Here's a good one, Mom. What keeps you motivated
and passionate about teaching dance after 30
years? Oh my gosh, that's so easy to say. I love
watching the kids progress from week to week.
And the fact, if they come to class and their
attendance is good, then they do improve. Attendance.
Drink every time I say attendance. No, no, no.
She's making her own games here. I'm sorry, is
this your show? And then said, no. I love to
see the progress. I love to see the kids who
are there because they want to learn how to dance.
I love to see how proud they are. I do. But there
are children questioning you, Mom. Vote for me.
That sounds hokey and cheesy, but that's what
keeps me going. That's why when I walk into the
studio, I go to the studio and I'm like, uh,
uh, uh. But then, but then. I'm gonna screenshot
that. When the kids come in and they are excited
to be there, that makes me forget about the outside
world. And for that hour, I am consummate in
my teaching. I don't think about it. Back it
up. You're. Yeah. All I heard was consummate.
No, no. Consummate. OK, that's not what I heard.
I am. I am consummate. Stop saying it. But but
there are some children. Let it go. There are
some children who. don't want to be there. They
only want to be there because their friends are
there. And you can tell the difference between
the kids who really want to be there. And that's
what motivates. The heck was the question? On
all ages, the three -year -olds all the way up
to the master classes. Mom, let the microphone
go. Carly tried to take it and she's strong -armed.
Well, short answers only. Here's a good one,
Mom, but listen. I'm going to give you two seconds
to think about it before you answer. She's shaking.
She's so excited. I'm so excited somebody's listening
to me. Because you're yelling. What is the legacy
you want your business to leave behind? Take
a moment. Take a hot second, mom. OK. You're
not actually taking a second. Carmela also doesn't
like quiet moments. She's acting. So for all
thoughts, it requires a noise to come out of
her mouth. What is the legacy you want your business
to leave behind? She died. Sorry. Is the legacy
would be the love you gave her the moment she
went is is what is the love of dance, the love
of community, the dance friends that they had.
growing up. I love, that's what I want it to
be. Oh, I know what I want it to be. Oh, that
was a fake answer. A safe, a safe haven from
the outside world. That's what I want it to be.
I want them to know that they are safe walking
in those doors of the dance studio, wherever
they may be, at Seafit or downstairs or upstairs.
Then again, please. don't observe my classes
anytime soon. And that they are important. Each
student is important. Like the mothers say to
me, how do you remember everybody? Well, because
each one of those students are important. And
I think that has been a forgotten thing. You
can talk to us too, you know. I can? Yeah. You
are campaigning to that camera. But I, that's
my legacy. That each student is important. Which
one? And I want them to love dance and feel good
about themselves and self -love. And then safe
haven. Add that in there too. It's a long legacy.
And I know that these two will carry it on. Oh
god, that's a loaded, that's a loaded statement.
We need to talk about that. Do you know, I just
would like to hold for a moment. Last year, I
brought you in to recite your motto off of the
dance, off of the dance website for a surprise
choreographed number we were going to insert
this, this speech into and goddamn she couldn't
get it out. Like this this was This is natural.
This is you talking except this would have been
a little hard. Yeah And the way she sat there
and Couldn't get any you said safe haven the
only reason that's triggering me to remind me
this because part of your motto on the website
is about it being a safe haven Yes, you don't
have a microphone. But yeah, that's perfect.
Wow. Look at the shoulder show But she said The
motto of the dance studio is, I love dance at
Safe Haven. And now she's like, well, let me
tell ya. That's what happens with age and wisdom.
She's doing a dance for us right now. What happens
with age and wisdom? You become prolific. She's
a consummate prolific. She's consummating prolificy.
Okay, that's a perfect segue, because you know
I'm a good segueist, into her personal personality,
which we all know you want to get to know a little
more of Ms. Carmella's personal personality.
Nope, none of that. What is your signature dance
move? I'm gonna hold the microphone. Chuck Kelly.
Yeah. Chuck Kelly. Yeah. You guys are going to
want to watch. You're going to want to tune in.
It's a pelvis move. Could you? I like, I like
pelvis rocks and pelvis moves. I am not the strongest
turner. This is why she didn't want us to ask.
Leaps. I like leaps. And jumps. Bar was never
my strength. If you're going out on the dance
floor, what are you doing? Pelvic thrust? Like
at a wedding? Or at a club? All of the above.
What club are you going to? You mean right now?
She likes pelvic thrust. Leave her alone. That's
her signature dance move. She just listed 20
things. My signature dance move. One of them
was the bar. Now is, what's it called? Hollaback
Girl? Yes, Hollaback Girl. It's the usher move,
mom, the usher move. She just did peace up, A
town down. Peace up, A town. Down. Okay, that's
enough moves. I'm crying. Wait a minute, wait
a minute. And the other thing, perculator, the
perculator. I like the perculator. We all like
the perculator. Victoria's face. I'm crying.
I thought you meant, I thought you meant trademark
in. Dance class, like ride out. I did. Like Phil
Black. I did. Phil Black Lee. Oh God, which animal,
no. A Jack Colby. A Jack Colby. No, I took it
away. Which animal best represents your personality?
That's the one that stumped you? Um. would say
a mouse no I would not I would I disagree I need
to know why because mice are and they run and
they can't catch and they're little and they're
in everything and they are a little hyperactive
I think you're thinking of a hamster or any pig
yes no no a hamster on a hamster wheel yeah yeah
yeah okay oh good okay What were you thinking
of? A hamster or a guinea pig? I need a tissue.
You sure do need a tissue. I'll ask the next
question. Why don't you go get one? Okay. And
I have my own mic. Oh, God, I'm dying. Oh, man.
Yeah, a hamster on a hamster wheel. But, you
know... No, no, no, we're done. That's it. That's
all. It's a simple question. I like peace and
quiet, too. No, you don't. Okay. I do. Question.
What boundaries have you established to protect
your personal life over the past 30 years between
business and personal? Well, I did. No, it's
good you breathed into the microphone. Sorry.
I didn't for the first 25 years have any boundaries.
Just the 25. Yeah, but the last five years I
have done boundaries. How? Prove it. Like yesterday.
I worked on the snow day, all day the snow day,
but I had those things that I could have done
on Sunday, but I'm not gonna do anything on Sunday.
Like correspond, I will do the schedule. Well,
that's good, because Vicki and I do your corresponding.
I did a lot of corresponding yesterday. That's
a problem. Because Victoria was unaware? Well,
I didn't want to bother anybody else on my...
on a snow day so I did the correspondence on
but Sundays I am Saturday afternoons at 1230
I turn off and I don't turn back on till Monday
morning now. Here's the problem that I have with
this because there are emails most emails that
I type faster but I have to get the official
how do you want to say this how would you like
to respond from Ms. Carmela. So every email is
from Miss Carmela, but I type faster, right?
So sometimes she'll write the email out and send
it to me and go, just send this. And oh my God,
not a period to be had, not a letter capitalized
or a comma. It is a run on sentence, a run on
four or five paragraphs. with no punctuation,
and she's like, just send it, just send it. So
the fact that you did correspondence. Yes, yes,
yes, I did. All tests today. They were very long
tests. If there'll be emojis in there. Oh yes.
Very business. Yes. Yes. Yes! Okay. Yes. Your
microphone's. Oh, add. Can I say one more thing?
I've made a lot of friends over 30 years of the
moms and the students and the dads. I've made
a lot of friends and I am very grateful for that.
But nobody asked you a question. No, there's
no question to answer for that. She just wants
to make sure she's going to be thinking about
this all week and what she didn't say and what
she should have said and what she could have
said. Do you look at her and think how ridiculous?
I need to know. Do you? OK, that's my lens. Stop
saying why. Woman, stop it. Do you know I almost
wore that sweatshirt today knowing that I should
have. That's why I wore it. That's why I'm wearing
the shirt. I have one underneath. Do you want
to switch? No, I don't want you to take your
shirt off right now. I have another one. No.
Oh god. Okay, mom. This is such a good idea.
I love the toilet paper. Carly, there are four
boxes of tissues open in this apartment. I can't
find them. You went into the bed hold on no you
went into the bathroom Reached above to get a
toilet paper roll this was on the sink. I just
grabbed it the tissues are at the window So oh
I didn't turn around Yeah, I had to get yeah.
Yeah, thanks mom Well Okay, what trait that you
have helped you survive 30 years as a business
owner. Oh, I know. Oh, this one she knows. I
am able to depart car. I knew it. I knew it.
I knew it was too good to be true. I knew it.
Decompartmentalize. I thought you were going
to tell us you were good at deparking people's
cars. I can't say it, but I'm able to put things
away. Just compartmentalize. Hey, hey. Just compartmentalize.
Compartmentalize. Not de -compartmentalize. And
also chill out. I am able to forgive and forget.
I am able to compartmentalize. I am able to be
flexible. And I am also able to put myself in
somebody else's shoes. And not get so angry.
Mom, it's okay. You got the job. You got the
job. Why is it so urgent? She's so afraid I'm
going to take the microphone away. She's trying
to get it out of his face. You got the job. Nobody
ever listens to me, so I have to say fast. Such
BS. Such BS. OK, she can compartmentalize. That's
a great trait that she has. If you didn't get
anything from what she just said. Of this entire
time. She is a compartmentalizing hamster. which
is a very good trait to have because I do not
have that. She is very, oh, you know that I don't
have that? Right, so. Oh, and I don't take anything
personally. Great, I take everything personally,
so. Also, you should take some things personally.
I don't. We always get very frustrated with her
when she doesn't get upset or angry and she just.
sort of goes, ah, it is what it is. No, no, no,
no. You get upset and you get angry. But then
the action to stand up for your business, for
yourself, for your teacher, for your whatever.
You start to soften. I do. And there is no. There
is no not necessarily pushback, but like if there
is a parent or someone, anyone who is. A little
bit of it on the attack. towards you or your
business, you do not... I retreat. Yes, you retreat.
You do not stand up off the bat for yourself,
even in a professional manner of how you would
word it. You just don't do it. No, but I have
all my teachers backs. She does. She has all
her teachers backs. Are you good? I'm good. She's
another one, which is why we are the way we are.
She keeps it in the family, all of her teachers.
They stay for years and years, 25 years, 20 years,
18 years. Which is the same a lot because she
doesn't pay them that much. But she really wants
to pay them more. She really wants to pay them
more. They're sticking around for that raise.
They're waiting for it. Another 30. But they
stay for a long time because she does have their
backs. She never sides, you know. Kids say stuff
like at school all the time, like and immediately,
you know, you want to see both sides of the story
and she will see both sides of the story. She
won't just say, you know, that the kid is always
right or the customer is always right. She will
back up her teachers. So that is she is being
honest. Yeah, that's not what I meant. I meant
like if someone's giving well, because that's
not a that's a not a factor. I was even thinking
about it. It's always it's always that you don't
stand up when you're like, I would write the
email. Thank you so much for your input. But
I've been in business for 30 years. I do know
what I'm doing. I appreciate it. But here's what
like A, B, C and D I stop shortchanging me. I
don't need your help. You stick to you. I got
me. You don't do that. You're like, thank you
so much. I never would have thought of that.
But then she won't do what the suggestion was.
She'll never do the suggestion. But it's like.
Is it a good suggestion? No. It's when people
are like, oh, Ms. Cromwell doesn't know what
she's doing. Hey, if you just did this and switched
these two classes, it's like, I'm sorry. You
don't know what you're talking about. You don't
ever send the stay out of my business email.
So that compartmentalization, we get frustrated
with because we wish you would stick up for yourself
more in those moments. But the fact that you're
in business for 30 years, that's why you do it
the way you do it. Because I don't get upset
about it. And if I do, like you said, I'm over
it. I'm over it by that night or the next day.
And then I can see it clearly. She also plays
the long game. And I learned that a long time
ago when I would get upset when people would
just not think she knew what she was doing, because,
you know, we're wacky. And sometimes people think
that, oh, Ms. Carmichael, just like you said,
oh, she doesn't know. Do it like this. And I
would say, Mom, tell them this. And she said,
I've been in business long enough to know how
to handle people. I let them think that it's
their idea, but I'm always getting my way. It's
funny, you're not representing yourself as such
right now. My friend Scott Douglas. Did you forget?
No, I didn't know if I wanted to say his name,
but my friend Scott Douglas said to me, 30 years
I... I directed shows at Shawnee Playhouse and
he said to me, you're a successful director,
choreographer because you're as dumb as a fox.
Aren't foxes sly? Right. So you pretend to be
I mean, you sort of come off as dumb, but you
know exactly what you're doing. You know how
to get what you want. And it works. I'll never
forget that he said that to me. And I looked
at him and I said, you're right. You're absolutely
right. Yeah, that's true. That's true. And I
feel like I'm the same way. It is true. You are.
Wait, look at Victoria. Yes, no, she is. She's
so, mom's like, she is so dumb. No, she's as
dumb as a fox. No, she's just dumb. No, she's
not. You're gonna get grounded. You think. You
think. You think. No, she's a lion. She roars
off the bat and wants to eat your head off. Don't
change your thought. She's now agreeing with
me. This is the problem. This is the problem.
She is a lion, but also an ostrich. Cause you
just want to put your head in the sand. You don't
actually want confrontation. I want to roar and
then hide and have somebody else handle it. Yes.
Yeah. You're like the lion. Nobody believes you
anymore. You've agreed with everyone. She'll
agree with everybody, but ultimately she will
get what she wants. And so just in case anyone
was ever underestimating that she actually has
every, she knows every aspect of the business
and what she's doing. That's yeah, I know you
do, but I don't think a lot of people, I mean,
I know everybody respects you and you've had
a business for 30 years, but that is something
that I will always remember when I used to fly
off the handle earlier and be like, I can't believe
you won't say this to this person. They're laughing
at you. And she's like, because I'm going to
get what I want, but I'll let them get that because
it's more important to them than it is to me.
And I'm going to get what I want. You know what
has gotten me through life at all is I am able
to laugh at myself. Nothing is, I don't take
anything too seriously that has to do with me,
myself, my kids, my studio, my family. There's
a lot of things. I just, I'm able to, I'm able
to compartmentalize it. I think we got that,
thank you. No, I'm not faking anything. I am
able to laugh at myself. I'm able to laugh at
myself. So when they take things, like people
say things to me and they think that I'm not
capable, I know I am. Like Carly said, I have
my finger on the pulse of everything at the studio.
No, she's the one who just said that. She's listening
to everything too. Just like I said last week,
I hear everything. Yes, she does. Amazing. Cause
neither one of you can handle silence. It's amazing.
Okay. We got that. So we're going to do a couple
quick. These are quick. So I am no longer the
hamster. If anybody ever asks me again, one animal,
I'm a fox. She won. She won the competition that
she's in with herself. She won. Am I a fox? She
said, am I a fox? I don't even know if this thing
is usable today. Like, I don't know if it's watchable.
I don't know if it's usable, but this will be
really fun to watch back in 30 years. Oh, okay.
Oh, yes it will. I won't be here. Oh my God,
I have to go to the bathroom. Okay. Mom, answer
these questions. quickly okay one word no she
said she said one word no okay what dance style
secretly drives you crazy you can't hold it contemporary
yes this is rapid fire the whole podcast wasn't
rapid fire but this is if your studio had a personality
what would it be friendly love it okay Which
song have you heard so many times you never want
to hear it again? Celebration. Come on. Good.
I hate that one too. Just hold it lower. What's
the most overused recital song of all time? Oh,
I don't want to say. Why? Because am I using
it? I am using it. All right. OK, well, just
OK. I'll use it all the time because I love it.
Thank heavens for little girls. That's right.
Is it really? Yeah, thank heaven. Are you doing
it this year? I love it. All right. If you could
redo one recital theme, what would it be? If
I could, definitely Broadway. Yeah. Yeah, Broadway
is my favorite. We could do it again. Yeah, we
can. I'm stealing all of MJ the musical, though.
Yeah. You've already done almost 90 % of the
song. This is a conversation for off -screen.
Okay, this is our last serious question. What
would be your 10 -year plan for the studio? I
think we need to know. I think I'm going to move
to Cancun. I don't think that's a good place
right now. No, I think I'm going to the 10 year
plan. Oh my gosh, my friend Don asks me this
all the time. And I don't know, it's really up
to you two. I would like to pull back a little
bit. I would like to take, no, no, I don't want
to teach. I don't want to stop teaching. I just
want to don't teach six days a week so that I
can really appreciate my classes when I do teach.
So I can't teach four hours in a row anymore.
So I would like to pull back a little bit. Good.
Next year in September, just pull back a little
bit. Got it. If you could write this all down
for us so we know what your time plan, 10 -year
plan is, that would be great. And then 10 years,
what am I going to be? Wait a minute. I'm going
to be 82 in 10 years. So in 10 years, I don't
think anybody's going to want to hear from me
at 80, 81, and 82. I highly doubt that. So I
think... I would just like to pull back so I
can appreciate it. We got it. We got it. We got
it. So the reason we overshare and we repeat
a lot is because we don't feel heard. We hear
you. OK, that's true. Yes, I know. Yes, it's
true. All right. That's what you learn. We learned
a lot from this entrepreneur. No, you're done,
mom. Of 30 years. We'll give you your last words
at the end. Really quickly, we're going to play
Hot Takes. with the hot tamale. Okay. That's
you. Oh, I'm the hot tamale! I love the... Okay,
do you know what a hot take is? No. Okay. She
doesn't know what a hot take is. What is a hot
take? I'm gonna say some things. A hot talkie?
No, it's not a hot talkie. I'm gonna say something,
and I want you to give me your initial reaction,
rapid fire reaction, but short, Mom, short. Okay.
Okay. Ready? Give her... Can I answer more than
one word? Yes, but you can answer more than one
word. It's got to be fixed. I'm stretching. I'm
getting ready for the hot take. OK, these are
hot takes from not just owning a business. This
is all inclusive. She thinks she's hitting a
buzzer, so she's ready to hit the buzzer. Bam.
OK, ready? Hot take. OK. No, I can't listen to
that sound. No. What sound? I can't. Oh, God.
Oh, Victoria. You did it! Okay. Ready? Victoria's
on sound duty. Okay. Hot takes with the hot tamale.
You ready? That's you, Mom. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.
The Beatles are overrated. No! Okay. Elvis stole
everything. No! Okay. Pop stars don't need to
write their own songs. Apparently not, even though
I thought they did. Country music is the best
genre. No. No. Pop music peaked in the early
2000s. Pop music peaked in the early 2000s. Pop
music did. Yeah. Goldfish are the most useless
pets. No. No, they're not. Reading a book isn't
always better than watching the movie. Yeah,
it is. Unless it's Harry Potter and then the
books were just as good. Audio books count as
reading. I love audio books, yes. FaceTime is
awkward. Yeah, mm -hmm. Small talk is a waste
of time. No, I am a queen of small talk. We know.
Silence isn't awkward. People just make it awkward.
Silence... Silence isn't awkward. Yes, yes, yes.
The best part about being an adult is canceling
plans, not making them. You did it! The more
expensive the juice, the more words they use
to describe pressed. She's gonna ask me to repeat
that. I have no idea what that means! Thank you!
The more expensive the juice, the more words
they use to describe pressed. Like, a pressed
juice, like... This is the antioxidant pineapple.
Okay, skip that one. Yeah. The treadmill is just
a hamster wheel for humans. Yes. She would say
that because she identifies as a hamster. No,
it's not. No, Mom, it's whatever you think. Okay.
I'm still thinking about the juice. Oh, God.
Vacations are more stressful than relaxing. No.
Used to be when the kids were little, but not
now. Texting. Texting is better than calling.
All depends on the situation. Handwriting doesn't
need to be taught anymore. Oh, 100 % false handwriting
should be. It's connected to the brain. I love.
High school reunions are unnecessary. Now that's
not true. I'm going to my 55th next month. When
is it? April 17th. No, no, I don't need the date.
But you said next week, next month. April 17th.
Okay, we don't need it. Everyone secretly loves
spoilers. No. Uh -uh. I don't know what a spoiler
is. This is why. Is it when you tell the story,
the ending of the story? Yep. Don't just, no,
we can't answer these questions. I can't believe
there's a name to that. Okay. The natural enemy
of the left sock is the washing machine. No,
I think it could be the dryer. I think you're
right about that. Adulthood. Hold on, you couldn't
answer? What makes you proud of the studio? You
knew it was the dryer? Okay. Last one. Adulthood
is saying things will slow down next week until
you die. Adulthood. Things will slow down next
week. Yeah. Yeah. I keep thinking next week will
be freer than this week. If that's what you mean.
Yeah. Maybe it's because you answer everything
with urgency. Like everything's on fire. Everything.
Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, I agree. Okay. She's saying
a lot of yes. That's a very odd question. Yeah
I didn't make it up. That's it mom. Oh can I
say one more thing? You did it! Thank you. Who's
your favorite CFIT sister? I don't have one and
you know I don't have one. I love celebrating
30 years of the dance studio because I love my
students, my teachers, my parents, and I am so
very proud, but I also think that my three best
products are my kids. Wait, why is Billy involved?
My three best products, because he's my product.
He does not, that's gross. He does nothing for
the studio. No, no. In addition to, separate
from the studio, I am proud, I am, I think that
I am most proud, yes I'm proud of 30 years of
the dance studio, but I'm most proud of my three
children. I have to go to the bathroom so bad.
I thought they were gonna take my microphone
away. And I have to thank them for this because
this is so much fun. Because when I asked them
to go out for lunch or dinner or breakfast, they
won't do it. Well, you know why? Because I teach
12 dance classes a week for you, so I don't have
time. Yeah, that's true. That's true. And yeah,
so they're busy. And I get it. And I get it.
To be fair, the only time you've asked us to
go get coffee or breakfast was when Carly brought
us to a performance of Melodies at School that
did not exist that day. That's right, that's
right. Oh, but will you go out to help out lunch
today? I don't, I'm busy. See? She would do this
in front of people so that we couldn't say no.
You could go out. a lunch or a drink sometime.
Yeah, I have five of your classes tonight, so
let's go out for a drink beforehand. Yes, yeah.
This has been fun. So anyway, I love, I love,
I love you. I have no idea who you are, but...
We know. Thanks for listening. Guess we're done.
She literally is gonna say when we get home,
I forgot to mention. You didn't say much. I can't
remember what I wanted to say. She said a lot.
It's been a great life. It's a great life. I
have a great life. I am extremely happy every
day. There are days, you know, you have your
ups and downs. You have your ups and downs, but.
Because you can't be happy every day, because
then you're a little crazy. But you have joy
every day, and I do have joy every day, because
I love my days. It's honest to God, she saves
it all up. She saves it all up for today. Yes,
because nobody listens. Because nobody listens.
Mom, all you do is talk. Everybody listens to
you because all you do is talk. Victoria, end
this. I can't. I can't. She said, yeah. Yeah.
Okay. Well, we were trying to be informative
over 30 years, but I think all you're going to
take away from this is that it's okay to be a
hamster. It's okay to compartmentalize being
a hamster. And consummate. Your days. And as
a hamster, you should consummate. No! Yeah, no,
that's what we took away. Hashtag Kamala's day
in the studio. Next time you look at her, she
is... 30 years family. Family. 30 years. 30 years
family. And you know who made that up? These
two. Or Victoria. By herself. 30 years family,
because that's the legacy that I wanted. That
question was 40 minutes ago. I know, but that's
true. It's family. It's family. It's family.
This is what it's like to talk to her at any
time. You just have to wait for the breath and
try to get a sound in, but she's gonna keep.
But also, if anybody has a good idea, it's both
of ours. It's never just Victorious. I got in
trouble the other night for ragging on Carly
too much because it's so easy and she just says
ridiculous things. And I got yelled at by this
one. Wait, how was I unaware of this? You were
standing there. You're about to be very aware.
And I said, this is not fair. She just texted
me and said how horrible I was the other day.
And she said, I didn't say that. And my mom went,
she wouldn't say that. And Carly went. Yeah,
I did. I said everything you do is stupid. She
said what I texted you was that everything you
did was stupid. But guess what? She didn't get
in trouble. She got a laugh, a roaring laughter.
At a funeral. Oh, yeah. They are the same person.
If Carly's sick, all I have to do is call Carmella
to come and fill in because it's the same. It's
the same thing. Oh, no, she's funnier than I
am. You don't have a microphone. Nobody can hear
you. Oh no, she's funnier than I am. She is funnier
than I am. She's amazing. She's quicker. She's
quick -witted. She's so clever. She's a fox.
I'm like the slapsticker and she's wittier. Yeah,
she loves hockey. Yeah, and then she's like,
bam, she's Sa -see -ch, right in there. No, no,
she's nothing. Okay. Sa -see -ch. I am Sa -see
-ch. Yeah, Sa -see -ch. Okay. That's the Italian.
So we just wish that you would always remember
to... celebrate your little wins, your big wins,
your 30 years in any way that you can remember
to celebrate. And we are proud of you. It is
a big, it's a big feat. We're not sure how you
did it. You don't think 30 years is a big feat?
I did it because of Vicky. Vicky kept me open
all these years or else I would never be able
to pay the bills. Vicki and she is the unsung
hero. Trust me when I tell you, she is the unsung
hero of the success of the studio. Vicki is the
one who takes care of all the big problems. When
I can't care, I give it right to Vicki. But I
also did it because it takes a village. And I
didn't do it by myself. I did it because we're
family. Vicki and I did it together until they
were old enough to separate the duties, the four,
and the staff, the teachers, all the teachers,
Ms. Kristen, Ms. Kristen. No one's left out.
No one's left out. We got you. Everyone's included.
Everyone's seen. We all saw you point to your
boobs. And say family. And Justin. No, Justin
doesn't even work there anymore, but it's fine.
Let's shout him out. Family, that's how we started.
You had your time. It's over. She's thinking
of all the answers that she wished she had said
now, but it's too late. That's why she lives
in a state of urgency. If you want to know who
Vicki is, go back to like episode 20. You can
watch the four of us and you can find out who
Vicki is. Yes. So. Vicki is the other half of
my brain. Trust me when I tell you that. Stop.
We don't trust you. Also, it was in that podcast
that Carmela realized my name was Carmela and
Victoria's name was Victoria and we are sisters
and her name is Carmela and her sister's name
is Victoria and they are sisters. Yeah. She's
just finding this out. I just, I realized it
that day. We wonder why people email and go,
Oh, Carmela doesn't, she doesn't understand things.
We'll, we'll let her know. Okay. I like being
me. I like being that way. I like being like
ADHD. A little flighty. But I like it because
it's easier. It's easier because you love everybody
and everything. And nobody's gonna hurt me. Little
tisms. Right? No one's gonna hurt me. Right?
If you get nothing else from this, remember you're
always fit to be Carmella. And always allowed
to be a lot extra. Bye! That was it. Just say
goodbye. I love you. No, just say goodbye. Bye.
Bye. Bye. She had to even it out. Everyone. 20
minutes. How long is it? Mom, we're still going.
Goodbye. For legal reasons, we have to tell you
that this podcast is meant for entertainment
and educational purposes. Only we are not healthcare
professionals. For all of your health, wellness,
fitness, and self -care needs, please refer to
the medical professional in your life. Your primary
care physician, your therapist, a certified coach,
whoever it may be. And then let us know what
they say because I guarantee we need to know
it too. Okay? Okay, bye.