Welcome to Fit To Be Real. And a little extra.
A 3 -2 -1 would be nice sometimes. Like, hey,
we're almost ready. I was looking at myself in
the mirror from the side. That seems like a you
problem. Like, 100%. You can see the computer.
You can see everything that's happening. But
you're looking at yourself. I was just. Is that
what we're saying? Just the 321 next time. No!
We're in 144 now. Maybe you can just give...
You think you just understand. Hello everyone
in the stratosphere. Help me get through the
next... Always 20 minutes. 20 minutes. We say
20 minutes before every episode. We say 20 minutes,
no editing, and it's 57. Yeah, last week's was
an hour, but... It was an hour and 15. Yeah,
but... It's my thinkers today and we all know
it's gonna take 20 minutes Not a lot of thinking
there's not a lot of thinking going on. I respect
it. I respect it Do you want to tell us how your
vacation was this time? Oh my god, it was so
much better. I was telling people That I've been
asking because they all remember because when
you're with the same people, you know, you're
in and you're out We know each other very well.
And they're like, oh, last year I had neurovirus.
I like that you had to describe that to us. Yeah.
Friendship. Friendship is when you see the same
people. What a thinker. Starting off strong.
Actually, there's a lot of friendship thinkers
in this one. But I said this year, we didn't,
as I had said last week, we didn't over schedule.
So we left room in case kids were tired or like
I was tired or So we didn't lose any money this
year in case somebody got sick. We lost a lot
of money last year booking things that we couldn't
get refunds on because of the norovirus. So it
was way chiller, way calmer and the perfect like
we got a lot done, but we also rested. That's
nice. Victoria held down the fort and I texted
her incessantly and she would always text me
back. I'm like, hey, how you doing? She's like,
amazing, fantastic, couldn't be better. What
do you want me to say? The building's on fire,
Carly. Be like rude. Come home, fix the fire.
No. And also, Carly lives with the phone in her
hand. Unless you're sleeping. I think that's
when your phone is not in your hand. Yeah, it's
not. Yeah. So I don't do that in case somebody
needs me nobody needs you and you don't ever
look at your phone So it's BS. No, I do look
at my phone. I just ignore everybody. Yes, I
don't ignore I just don't always respond but
I see and like if I want to know what's going
on I Would so you take a minute to get back if
you feel like you need to take the mate to get
back, right? Yeah, okay. So when I do that Because
I literally don't screen your texts. I just don't
Look at my phone every five seconds. She has
the gall, the gall after I'm the one teaching
to go, good talk. Honestly, I'll give you a buffer
within 10 minutes of not responding. I'll give
you 10 minutes, even though it's really five.
Good talk. Oh, she was so mad. And then she was
like, what did you say? I wanted to say contrary
to popular belief. I do not have the phone in
my hand. Instead, I said, I'm not sitting on
my phone, LOL, because I'm a millennial. And
I said LOL, and she said rude. And I said, no,
no, this is a different part of the conversation.
I can't. Where she's trying to schedule things
while she's on vacation with her family. She
didn't want to get. from the pool. The bacterial
wave pool at the aquatopia. Understandable, but
also let's not plan things for May, June, July
while you're on vacation. I looked at my phone
and went, haha, we don't have to do this right
now. Why don't you enjoy vacation? And she said,
LOL, which to her is F you. That's the two different
parts of this story that she's going to try to
make me the bad guy. And she said, rude. And
I said, sure. And she knows I hate. And she gets
so mad when I text her. So that, yeah, it was
a good weekend. Yeah, good talk. Okay, I will
say, if you've ever gone to a kid's water park,
Victoria wouldn't survive five minutes. I wouldn't
go. She wouldn't survive. Like, all the things
that we were doing. Why? My god other than the
fact that like I think it's gross. It's because
it's gross. Yeah, like just the kids in the wave
pool and like the You know, the floors wet. Yeah
people go to the bathroom without sandals, which
I don't know how people do that and there's like
hair Yeah, yeah. Okay. Okay. Okay. She just she
would not survive Just gagged I look I may not
seem like I could care less about a lot of things
other people care less about, but I that doesn't
bother me. I care that it's hard to hear you
talk. I care about it's it's a struggle to get
your thoughts out. Well, because we're doing
a lot of thinking today. Now, last week, we did
victorious thinkers, which I think my thinkers
are a little different than her. It's like my
drink every time we say think. Think I think
our algorithm. Damn it. I'm aware that our algorithms
are different. Oh my God. What's your first one
Carly? So these are ones that I don't run the
fit to be real Instagram. So I don't usually
post this stuff. You send me stuff that I'll
repost, but I never say that it came from you.
But I don't really post it on my personal ones.
I usually do nostalgic, like 1999 posts. I have
trauma, here's me laughing about it type of therapeutic
memes. So, but as Victoria says, contrary to
popular belief. I said it once. And it was in
jest. I deep think, no, I deep dive. We don't
think you deep think. I actually don't think
you deep think. I think that's the problem. No,
I think I do, but I just don't tell you that
I do. OK. I wish you could see Victoria's face
right now. This isn't really a deep one, OK?
No disclaimers. I'm not allowed to disclaim.
I don't know. I did every time. OK, you did.
All right, but this isn't really a thinker. Just
think about it. OK. Everyone's drunk already.
If you're playing the game, we're schwaisty.
Should we see it again? Too many people buy things
they don't need with money they don't have trying
to impress people they don't even like. And that
seems so simple and it is. Like that's literally
the world. Everyone's trying to impress people
that don't even matter. It's social media. Do
you think? Yes, because how would we know otherwise?
Like in the 50s, you know, I love to go back
to the 50s. It was house parties or dinner parties.
Like you saw what other people had. And you're
like, well, I want that too. But back then, if
you didn't have it, you couldn't pay for it.
That's true. There was no credit. Like, I mean,
there was credit, I'm sure. But to the degree
that we are living in now, I think that's a little
bit different. I think in the 90s, it's like
you knew your bubble. We knew our mall. We knew
who was going where when and what. clothes they
were wearing to the St. Kevin's dances, but we
didn't know the wide scope of like, people at
Ridley. Right. Like you didn't know that far.
Now you know everything. And I would have fights
with our mom about my clothes for people that
I don't even talk to anymore because I was trying
to impress my friends who I haven't spoken to
in 20 years. And at the same token, you have
your quote unquote finger quotes New York wardrobe
that you won't wear here because you're not in
New York. Right. Who cares? Who cares? Like,
why not? You're going to die. Oh, at some point.
At some point. So why not wear the outfit? When
your husband kills you? Do you know something
I don't know? I let it slip. Dun, dun, dun. No,
the same thing. I think somebody said on the
podcast, the red lipstick theory. Like, wear
the red lipstick. You're going to the grocery
store. Just wear it. Yeah. Who cares? So it's
the same that I like that thinker because it
goes both ways. Don't impress anyone, but also
do what you want. Do what you want. Who cares?
Yeah. Who cares? Yeah. I'm going to wear my New
York wardrobe. Like you want Melody to wear dresses
more. You would like her to wear. She used to
wear dresses and like the big bows and all that
stuff. But she's not in that phase right now.
She also doesn't see you wearing it. I know.
You wear jeans. That's true. So like she thinks
jeans are fancy clothes. Which they are. And
so does Lewis. Lewis will be like, no, it's fancy.
And I'm like, dude, it's blue jeans. Like, it's
not super fancy. Life is different. But I agree,
just because I don't like to wear jeans. But
you have the wardrobe to not just wear jeans
and a sweater. Like, you could funk it up a little.
I could funk it up a little. I'd funk it up a
lot. I don't like how you really punch the F
there. You don't really funk it up a lot. Yeah,
that's true. You see what, nope, you do what
you say sometimes. Monkey see, monkey do. And
mom dressed differently. And I think that's why
I, my growing up, I always wanted to dress differently.
Wait, mom dressed differently? She wore flannels
and jeans and baseball hats and other moms were
dressed like coals. Like coals, yeah. And our
mom was not a coals mom. It wasn't different.
Yes, it was. She wore short dresses and tights
with... like Doc Martens. Yeah, she was a lesbian.
She was a 90s grunge lesbian, but none of the
above were true. Yeah, but she dressed differently
and I always was like, I want to dress differently.
I never wanted to dress like everybody else.
I always wanted to dress differently. And somehow
I'm the only one who gets flack for it. Well,
because I wasn't dressing in cow pants. I looked
it up on Amazon the other day. They exist. I
bought a pajama set. Oh, and my slippers. Oh,
I saw them when I walked in. My new slippers.
I decided to ignore them. Look how great they
are. Moo, bitch. We're getting explicit more
and more towards the beginning of the episode.
So as long as you know that. Merica. Merica.
All right. All right. This one I actually don't
love. After I thought about it, I was like, oh,
that's a good one. And then I was like, I actually
don't agree with this. Oh, OK. If it doesn't
open, it's not your door. How do you not agree
with that? Because I don't believe that if it
doesn't open for you, that that's not your door.
Try again. Go, like, do you know what I mean?
Like, to me, that was so, all right, if that
doesn't work for you, do something else. But
no, just keep trying. It's jammed. Well, right.
It's not the right door. But there's a door for
you. It's not the right door. Yeah, but. It's
not that that's the only door. There's probably
a window. There's no door. There could be a window
right next to it. Well, you're really thinking.
I was just I read it and I was like, oh, I like
that one. And I was like, wait a second. If it's
not your door. No, if it doesn't open, it's not
your door just means try harder to get it open.
Don't abandon. Don't abandon door. All right.
I'll give you try. like try, try again. But what
if that try, try again is trying like all the
doorknobs until the one, the right one opens.
And it might be a little different than the first
one you were trying, but that one's actually
the best option. You were just trying for the
wrong door. I mean, I see that side too. That's
why I liked it initially. I think that's what
it means. I don't think it means like just give
up. Like give up. But you took it there. I did.
And then now I'm thinking, why would somebody
put that quote out to be motivational if it meant
kill up? Because that's your type of motivation.
Moving on. But I see what you mean, though. OK,
this one I understand. Oh, no. But I like the
way they put it. Never give from the depths of
your well, but from your overflow. Like, you
cannot give to somebody when you don't have it
fulfilled. You have to be overflowing with something
to give it. Right. Yeah. I think that's important
and nobody does that. I think everybody gives
from an empty well. I don't think anyone's ever
cup overfloweth. Like, I don't think we live
in that. And that's not fair. No, I think we
don't live like that. Yeah. We give from an empty
well most of the time. Yeah. But you shouldn't
give unless you are filled yourself. Yeah. Yeah.
I like that a lot. I'm going to... Can't drink
from an empty cup. Is that the... Sort of same
thing. Say yours again. Oh, what I made up was
never give from the depths of your well, but
from the overflow. You didn't make that up. It
says depths. You would say never give from the
bottom of the place that you hold a lot of water
and there's no water there That's what you would
say single single double Sometimes she cues and
she just says go I looked here today. I said
doing boy She was like, you got this, go. I said,
you taught us once. I don't got this. I don't,
nobody got this. Delko Heckler was in class today
and I haven't taught in four days. So I was new
again and she did not give me a break. Cause
you were the one telling us what to do and you
were taking breaks from that. It's behind you.
You fool. I don't have enough to give you from
my empty cup. My bucket for the deficit. It's
not a well anymore. It's just a bucket. It's
a slop bucket. A throw up bucket. Mirka. Mirka.
Sounds about right. Okay. Oh, I like that one.
I think it's that's. Yeah. Yeah, it's great.
100%. This one I really liked moving on. Yeah.
Because I think this is just another way to say.
you know, you got to walk in somebody else's
shoes. Every Saint has a past and every sinner
has a future. Like, I love that. Every Saint
used to be a sinner and every sinner could be
a Saint. Could turn into a Saint. Yeah, like
it doesn't define you because you were one way
at one time. Like you can change, you know? Yeah,
yeah, yeah. Oh, I, I, yes. I didn't take it like
that. But I don't know why I didn't take it like
that initially. Every saint has a past and every
sinner has a future. Yeah, that's exactly what
that means. It's pretty straightforward. You
don't really have to think about that one. That's
what I like. That's the one you don't have to
think about. Cup runneth over. She was like,
let's dissect it. No, I think that every... I'm
not explaining that. It's self -explanatory.
You'd be a great teacher. Like, I actually think
you would be teacher of the year. I would be
like, kids, I don't understand why you don't
understand. Our brother says that to us all the
time. I say that in my head to some of my dance
students. I don't understand why you don't understand.
I don't understand how to help you. I will look
at a child and go, help me help you. And then
usually they have an answer. Because if you say,
what part don't you understand, their answer
is going to be, I don't know. I don't get it
or I don't know. I'm like, but what part? I don't
know. So then I have to, like, incite questions.
And I'm like, how do I help you? And then they're
like, oh, you do this. I'm like, that's funny.
Thank you. Wow. You'd be a really great teacher.
Horrible. Horrible. Horrible. Oh, wow. You are
a horrible teacher. Yes. All right. This one,
actually, people don't think this about me. I
love the disclaimers. But this is me. Prove it.
Okay. The quieter you become, the more you're
able to hear. So, okay, my... She's laughing
because she knows it's true. I may not seem quiet,
but I'm watching everything. I can hear everything.
And I'm always watching. And I might not come
across as... I come across loud and wild and
psycho, but I have, growing up, I can see and
hear everything and I, that's, I'm quiet up here,
but not in my mouth. I was pointing to my head.
That's what you took from that quote? Yeah. Say
it again. The quieter you become, the more you're
able to hear. You need to quiet the noise and
you can hear. Right, but you're taking it as
like I don't I I hear everything I don't miss
a beat. No, I'm an observer That's what I took
that as. I'm I'm actually quiet as a person.
Then how come you can't handle silence? You are
incapable of a silent moment where you think
it's uncomfortable and awkward and like you absolutely
just have to talk Like somebody has to make noise.
I don't do that when I'm with you guys. I do
that at work That's when you're with us guys
I'm at family. I can be completely silent for
three days with my family that I don't like silence
at CFIT Let's move on I'm upset But I do I do
agree with this the quieter you become the more
you're able to hear if you're constantly telling
people what you're doing all the time like That's
one of my biggest pet peeves when people are
constantly talking and saying what they're gonna
do and this, and then it never happens because
you're just being loud and you're talking. Be
quiet and prove what you're gonna do. Don't like
posting your vacations or like posting your kids
or like your everyday move. What does that have
to do with anything? Yeah, it's loud. It's a
loud world. It's a loud, loud world. I don't
agree with that, but we'll move on. All right.
Let them. If you're a giver, remember to learn
your limits because the takers don't have any.
Ooh, sucks to be a taker. Yeah. If you're a giver,
remember to learn your limits because the takers
don't have any. I 100 % agree with that. It's
the same as you can't give from an empty cup.
No. I think this means like this is all about
boundaries. If you're constantly giving. Does
a cup not have a boundary? You can't. You can't.
What? Yeah, I think it's it's similar because
it's it's just the other side of the bucket.
Yeah. It's the outside of the bucket constantly
taking because they have no boundaries. Right.
They're not going to stop you from getting a
benefit from you. They're benefiting. They're
gonna stop you doing that. But you also, yeah,
you have to create boundaries. You have to fill
your cup up first. Yeah, I'm not great with boundaries.
Or thinkers. I think my thinkers are good. This
one is short and sweet. Is that the thinker?
Yes. No, no, that wasn't it. That's what she
said. Be valuable, not available. I think that
is the shortest yet most important quote that
I have today. Because the more you value your
time, your efforts, yourself, you're not gonna
be as available. If you're constantly available,
you have nothing left. Yes, you can't give from
an empty cup. So wait, they're all the same thing.
See, I'm making you think. that they're different,
but they're all the same. Oh, my God. Oh, my
God. It's true, though. I like how this one is
worded. Because it's short and sweet. Short and
sweet. But it's the same thing. Sorry, I'm going
to cut you off. It's the same thing, not with
just time. I think it's with advice. Like people
will value your advice more if you don't give
it every five right right right yeah, and they'll
value your time more if you're not always gonna
Accommodate and be available because well she'll
do it of course she'll do it right because you
will right so it's stuff like that I actually
am using that when people ask me for stuff. I'm
like oh, I have to I'm absolutely as long as
I'm available Not like oh, yeah, we'll figure
it out. It's like as long as I'm available so
that when I'm not available It's because I'm
not available, but like I will definitely see
if there's a way to figure that out But instead
of saying it because that gives them the like
a work. She's gonna figure it out, right? It's
like well, I'll do it if I'm available She said
that to me three times this week Start somewhere
Okay, this one's a long one so I went really
short to really long you ready You're overthinking
because you really care what happens next. You
don't want to fail. You don't want to let people
down. But no amount of planning, worrying, or
overanalyzing can give you control over what
happens next. Yeah. I mean, you really have to
think about that if you're an overthinker. I
don't think you do. Yeah. If you're an overthinker
because you really care about what happens next.
Overthinkers just care about what happens next.
They don't get to the next sentence. I don't
care about the next sentence, usually. I just
overthink because I care about what happens next.
But isn't the next sentence what's next? You
don't want to fail. You don't want to let people
down. But no amount of planning, worrying, or
overanalyzing can give you control over what
happens next. And that's the truth. But as an
overthinker, I don't think about that part. But
you have to remind yourself that no amount of
overthinking is going to change it. Yep. Yeah.
She's the worst today, honestly. Are you overthinking
this? I'm going to. She's so angry. Oh my god,
she's so annoying. If you're watching, if you're
not watching, tune in. Rewind like three seconds.
Check out her eyes. That's how you know she's
actually annoyed. Well, I have been getting on
top of Melody for that because Melody. cannot
stop rolling her eyes and like doing that to
me. And I was like, ah, shoot, it's happening.
I don't think you do that. Yeah, I do. Well,
you just did it. You just did it in response.
Rude. But yeah. And she, I guess, learned it
from me. I like this one because. Shut up. It's
a different way. No. It's a different way to
just say anxiety is just worrying about the future.
Yeah, but you're saying it's caring So you're
saying it in a really long way You're saying
anxiety and overthinking isn't worrying about
fear It's because you care so much about the
outcome that you care about the future, right?
You're spinning it in a positive way, but still
need to be yet. But but yeah, but it's still
wrong You care about the future sure but No amount
of worrying is going to change that. So you got
to let it go. Right. But overthinkers don't like
to let things go. They like to worry and overanalyze.
Should we think about it some more? Yes. Yes.
No, this one's for Victoria. Oh, if you don't
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Personal one? Yeah. I got
a personal one for Victoria. If you don't know
the whole story, shut up. Yes. No objection.
Sustained. No notes. No notes. If you don't know
the whole story, shut up. Shut up. This wasn't
really for Victoria, but shut up. Just shut up.
Shut up. Shut it up. Just shut up. Shut up. It's
so true. Why do we talk about things that you
don't know? Why? Because people do it all the
time. That's what the world is right now. I know.
That doesn't mean I have to accept it. Just shut
up. If you don't know the whole story, just shut
up. Shut up. That was a minimal thinker. That's
what we call a minimal thinker. She's a minimalist.
Minimalist. She's actually a maximalist. Yes,
I am a TJ maximalist. I knew. I knew she was
going to say that. Insert I roll here. I don't
have to insert. I'll just do it. This one is
for Victoria because Now this is how she thinks
and this is how I would like to think more would
you say I think I said I don't believe you but
honestly, I don't remember and it was two seconds
ago. I'm not sure Okay Anything you lose by speaking
your truth isn't a loss Anything you lose, anything
you lose by speaking your truth isn't a loss.
I didn't say the last part. It's an alignment.
You can't dissect the thinker. It's an alignment.
Yeah. And that's very Victoria. Just say what
you mean. And oh, well. Yeah. If they don't join
you, then they weren't meant to be in your, at
your dinner table. Right. You know, like if they...
Want to uninvite themselves because you stood
up for yourself and your thought and your idea
and your whatever then Let them go. Let them
go. Yeah, that doesn't make it confrontational
youth. They just think it's confrontation. Well,
I took it more as like Like we don't We don't
post stuff. We've talked about this before we
don't post stuff But if we did and people chose
to unfollow us for it, that's not a loss We don't
post political stuff. We don't post political
things we believe in, like not just politics.
Faith. Faith. The stuff that people have strong
opinions about. The things you don't talk about
at Thanksgiving dinner. Unless you all think
the same way. Unless, right. But if there's a
disagreement, we tend to not post about those
things. And if we did, and we lost people for
it, then those people weren't for us anyway.
Right. Take for instance If anyone came in if
we were this kind of happened if if someone was
talking about Super Bowl halftime and how amazing
bed bunny was and like how entertaining was and
if someone came in thinking the opposite Due
to the fact that this is what the you know two
-sided thought was about it. Oh Well, oh well,
yeah, goodbye don't it's a I'll pay your monthly.
I'll pay Carly the monthly. You can go and don't
come back. You know what I mean? I don't see
the loss. Right. And that's why I thought of
Victoria for that one because I was like, I get
so worried. Oh God, the loss. And she's like,
then they're not for us anyway, so it's not a
loss. So there's that. And this next one I picked
for our brother. Nice face. But you'll understand
when I read it. It's only too late if you're
too convinced that it is. You can start right
now and still create a dream. Like, whoa, whoa,
whoa, whoa. Say it again. It's only too late
if you're too convinced that it is. You can start
right now and still create a dream. Pedro, what
is he saying? Oh, no, no, no, no, no. This is
Steve Fitz CEO Andrew. Oh, God. What did he say?
Sorry to bother. I forget where my wife is. Is
she with you? I need to grab the easy pass out
of the pilot. Yes, she's here. I forget where
my wife is. I'm going to kill him. Sorry to bother.
I'm at Victoria's. I said, yes, she's here. I
made it happy though. Literally recording. I
didn't say she's laughing at you. We just read
your text message on the podcast. Like, are you
serious? All about honesty here. Pager said,
is this the Carly is deep episode? Trying. Thinking.
Thinking. OK. I'm sorry. Before my husband was
looking for me and didn't know where I was when
I said, hey, I'm going to Victoria's. You say,
no, no, no. Sorry to bother. Sorry to bother.
It's not even sorry to bother you. Just sorry
to bother. I forget where my wife is. I'm never
deleting that text. Oh God. What were you saying?
Okay. And that is our life in a nutshell. So
he did call me twice that I ignored him. We're
recording. I was ignoring his calls. Come on.
Be smarter. It's only too late if you're convinced
that it is. You can start right now and still
create a dream. And I thought of our brother
because he never thinks it's too late and he
will start over at whatever, whenever. Like,
he was a cheerleader. Then he was like, I'm not
gonna do this anymore. I'm gonna be a police
officer. And he's like, I cannot physically and
mentally do this. I'm gonna be a pilot. And he
is crushing it. And I feel like and that was
when he was 40 41. Yeah, I was just this weekend.
We met a pilot in a pilot in the Poconos and
he's been a pilot for 20 years and he's about
to retire. And I was talking about Billy and,
you know, Andrew was like, well, he's 43. He
said, who cares? We would love to have a 43 year
old pilot like usually they come right out of.
the Army or the Air Force, and they're super
young. But this guy, if he wants to be a pilot
at 43, he wants to be a pilot. Right, right,
right. Yeah. So I love that one because just
even with working out, if you think it's too
late, then yeah, it's too late. You convinced
yourself that it's too late, then it is. Right.
But if you don't, start over. Start now. Do something
different. Well, they say that every commercial
for every online college, like Phoenix or whatever,
start today. Like you're not too late to go back
to school. You're never too old to go back to
school. It feels like we are because society
says that you have to have babies by this time
and that life should be like this by this time.
So like we're kind of trained. Trained that way.
But it's not true. I love the thing that goes
around like Harrison Ford didn't get his first
whatever until this age and like it lists so
many of the names that we think. have been doing
this for so long, but really we didn't know them
until they were in their mid to late 40s, 50s.
Harrison Ford was a carpenter and a construction
worker until he was 42. Oh, yeah. And then he
became famous. So you can do whatever you want
at any age, as long as you tell yourself that
you can. And it's not too late to get yourself
back out there if you are too exhausted to try
getting into a new relationship. It's whatever
you talk yourself into. Yeah. you have to convince
yourself. That's the only person that you need
to convince. So I liked that. Billy, good job
at that. I will say, it's good to have a good
support system no matter what, though. Yeah.
Why? I thought you were gonna elaborate. Well,
you can convince yourself to do anything, but
it's super, way more helpful when you have your
people backing you up. Right. And like, I'm pretty
sure... I could be wrong, but I think mom helped
convince him that like, you can do this. You
have to have someone in your corner to drown
the noise that you're putting in your own head,
that overthinking. Yeah. The noise that I'm really
quiet in my head about, you got to drown that
out because when you're really loud, it doesn't
work. But when you're quiet from within, just
trying to drown you at all. All right. This one's
really deep, Pedro's. I don't know if you can
handle it. Let me know. Let me hear from you
if you can handle it. He's probably tuned out.
Okay. But I really hope he's not. Everything
that is at some point wasn't. I like that you
look at me like you've invented this thought.
I've invented all. I am the first one to read
all of these. But also say it again. This one
was easy. Say it. Everything that is at some
point wasn't. And you have, I thought about CFIT
because I was like, Man, if somebody had told
me 15 years ago where we would be today, I'd
be like, there's no way. We're at mom's dance
studio. I'm doing two hours a day, one morning,
one night. There's two people in class. At one
point, there was no C -Fit, and now look at it.
It's very interesting to think about. To think
about. Victoria's like, I really wish there wasn't.
Be kind, rewind, you know? Be kind to rewind.
I was living the dream in New York, which I also
hated. Yeah, I mean, I feel like it's so basic
I'm making it complicated by thinking it's harder
than it is. Yeah, you don't have to think about
it. So glad we're at the thinkers. Don't think
about this. But I think the basic ones are the
hardest. That hit you the hardest, the basic
ones. Yeah, basic ones. Like bees. The basic
ones. The basic bees. Hit you the hardest. Yeah,
everything that wasn't there didn't exist at
a time. So if you think of it, it could happen.
Yes, that's what that means. Manifest it. Ooh.
You don't watch Bravo. We can't talk about Amanda
and her manifestations. Aw. Another day. We'll
get somebody on here that likes Bravo. OK, this
one hurt my feelings. I cannot wait. You were
offended. I was. No, it hurt my feelings. I wasn't
offended. Okay. But it hurt my feelings. The
day we fret about the future is the day we leave
our childhood behind. The day. The day we worry
about the future. I like that you just changed
fret with worry. I did it for you. That's good.
That's good. G. Okay. Is the day we leave our
childhood behind. It's like the day you start
worrying about the future. Now, I know that's
not exactly true. Your childhood isn't over because
you worry about a test in two weeks. No, but
think about the education system now. I talk
to the seventh and eighth graders. They're trying
to take college courses to get the credits in
so that they can get their credits into high
school. And then when you're in high school,
you're taking AP classes. And it's so hard. And
all I do is study. And I don't really go out
because I'm studying because I want to get those.
College courses. Be a high schooler. Go to the
homecoming. Stop. You have the rest of your life
to worry about all these markers coming up. Yeah,
and I agree with that. I think that is happening
younger in the school system than we had. Well,
just think about all the kids in second and third
grade that come in saying they have anxiety.
When we all get emails from parents, she can't
come to class today because she's having an anxiety
attack. Like, why? She's 10. Even younger. Even
younger. That did not happen when we were young.
Or maybe if it did, it was very rare. So I know
it has to do with social media. But I think about
Melody. I do have two sons. I talk about Melody
a lot. But she's of age of social media, everybody
around her. Like, Louis and Dina are really no.
They're worried about Super Mario Brothers and
stuff like that. But the day that we fret about
the future is the day we lose our childhood.
And I was like, oh my god, that sounds horrible.
But there are parameters to that, like you said.
It's not like, oh, I'm worrying about the game
on Saturday. That's the future. Or like a project.
I want the game to go well. Yeah, I want to get
this project done. But it's not like, well, if
I don't do this by this. then I won't be able
to get into this college. If I don't get into
this college, then I can't do that. Like, that's
where it trickles into like, oh, you don't have
innocent like brains anymore. Yeah. Innocent
brains. No innocent brains for you anymore. Harrison
Ford ate those in like Temple of Doom. Circling
back. Temple of Doom, Indiana Jones, please don't
cancel or cite us. Harrison Ford does not eat
people. Okay, my childhood is over. I have to
move on. This one? Yeah, you're 40. Your childhood
is over. But you're an adult teenager. I'm an
adult teenager? Right? Isn't that what we said?
Oh god, that was a while ago. It's like when
you turn to be an adult in your 20s, you're like
a baby adult. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then you're
a toddler adult, then you're in... Teenager adult
I thought about that the other day because I
was listening to the podcast and I was like,
oh what do the kids say and then I was like Now
if somebody that was 70 is listening to our podcast
they would think that I was a kid. Yes Which
is something I never understood when mom would
be like, oh, you're a baby. You're a baby I'd
be like what? Yeah, what are you two? Why are
you saying that to them? They're 30. Yeah, they're
30 Oh my god, and then now that you know, you're
of that eat. I'm like, wow, yeah I have a hard
time remembering it for myself, but I can look
at my friends and be like, but you're so young.
I know. I think everybody, a lot of people could
do that because I can look at you and be like,
oh my God, she's only 37. She's got so much time,
but I'm close to death. No, but you are though.
Have you seen the black under your eyes? I thought
I hit that today. Lots of mascara running down
the face right now. Lots of eyeliner just sitting
under there. All right. This is not a thinker.
This is a straight forward. Small circle, private
life, clear mind. Was this Friday Night Lights?
Keep your circle small, keep your life private,
you'll have a clear mind. I got two of those,
one of those. What do you got? I only have small
circle and that's by choice. Don't talk about
your chest like that. I'm self -deprecating.
Who invited her to my thinker party? At least
you have two small circles. Your thinker party.
Small circle. What was the second one? Private
life, clear mind. And the reason that I thought
about this was because, as I've said before,
people have said we keep our business and the
family as an insult. And I was like, no, I like
our small circle. It's worked for us. Now, sometimes
I think it's too small because I look and I,
Victoria is my only friend and I'm like, damn,
I really kept it small. Super tired. It's exhausting.
LOL. Good talk. So when, when she's mad at me,
when I text, I have nobody else to text. Don't
text anyone. Be private. Go sit in a circle.
This goes, there's nothing to think about that.
Just do that. This one, I wish my mom was sitting
right here because she would say, I have been
saying this to you since you were a teenager.
Oh my God. Beast from the East? Yes. It literally
just says beast from the East. It's a vibe. You
should, that's a good thinker. Like what does
it mean? It's just my picture. Okay. This is
nobody's thinking about you. Thanks mom. Mom
would say, I've been telling you this, mom sounds
horrible. No. that like nobody was ever thinking
about you. They aren't. No, listen, let me finish.
Let me finish. They aren't. They weren't. They
never were. Oh my God, there's really more to
this? People are just thinking about themselves.
People don't have time to worry about what you're
doing or how well you're doing it because they're
caught up in their own drama. I saw this yesterday
or maybe this morning. Really? Yeah. I just read
it. So it sounds harsh. Nobody's thinking about
you. But the reason my mom always used to say
that, not in those words exactly. Nobody's thinking
about you. But everybody's worried about themselves.
I think I called that out in class today. I said,
nobody likes you. Nobody likes you. That's very
different. Shanna's doing really ridiculous stuff
that she was like, look what I can do. Look what
I can do. I was like, literally no one likes
you right now. Not one person is doing what you're
doing. Look around the room. Read the room. I
said, go at your own pace. She was like, she
looked like a crazy person. But nobody was thinking
about me, so it didn't matter. They were thinking
about you and not the way you wanted. But yes,
yeah, it's like, I mean, so many different ways.
It's the same thing we said about wear the outfit.
No one's thinking about you. And if they do in
something like that, it's like, oh, wow, that
was different. Or I wish I could wear that or
whatever. And then they're thinking about themselves
again. Right. Like everyone's thinking about
themselves to a degree. Yeah. But there's so
many of it. I'm thinking about the dark under
your eyes. I think there's so many times that
like, I mean, everyone does this. You cannot
out there. You cannot tell me that you don't
do this. What? but you'll overthink an interaction
where you're like, wow, that was really awkward.
I can't believe I said that. Oh, do you think
they took it this way? And then you overthink
it for days and you go to that person, which
I've totally done and gone, I'm so sorry about
the other day. And they're like, huh? What are
you talking about? Yeah, what are you talking
about? They have no idea. Yeah. But I've now
wasted three days thinking about it. Yeah. Nobody's
thinking about you. Such a waste of time. It's
a harsh way to say it, but really everyone's
thinking about themselves and trying to get through
life. And nobody's thinking about you. Yeah.
No one's thinking about what you look like. No
one's thinking about your body. No one's thinking
about just think about the order that you're
ordering at the front of the counter. No one
behind you is thinking about what you just ordered.
You know, like those little thoughts that you
don't own. Right now, you're not even registering.
Yeah. But like, oh, I won't order that because
then people will think I'm going to have the
donut and I shouldn't be eating a donut. Right.
What are you talking about? No one's even thought
about you in this line right now. Yeah, there's
life is too busy and chaotic and crazy. Everyone's
thinking about themselves. Carly's certainly
thinking about herself. I mean, 100%. Okay, this
was my whole thing growing up. I hated when people
would call me typical. You're a typical teenager.
You're typical. I hated that. I wanted to be
different, not in the way Victoria wanted to
be different. Hold on, I don't want to be different.
I wanted to stand out. I just was. And I got
berated for it by my sister. Well, that was so
annoying because she just was different and I
wanted to be different. And so this quote is
for both of us. No, make it different for me.
Inspired by the fear of being average. So you're
inspired by the fear of being average. The pauses,
change. everything. But it's true. I never wanted
to be normal and average and just like regular.
I always wanted to stand out and that was like
a big fear of mine. Why? What's that symptom?
Not a fear. I just think because I wanted to
move to New York and I felt very happy there
and like... That was different. That was different.
It was different. I knew I was always going to
move back home and nothing about Delco. I mean,
obviously, I love it here and I came back here.
But I knew that I wanted something different.
But at that age where we grew up, if you're not
around here, there were like two places that
you went. You went to Westchester University
or you went to Penn State University. And you
basically redid high school again just with a
lot more people in these two places. so i remember
being like i i don't want to go there i don't
want to go like i want to do something else and
that doesn't necessarily make it like the right
i clearly made the wrong choice i ended up having
to transfer but oh oh pepper's yelling at me
but um that's what you mean by like There's nothing
wrong with Delco. It's just that's what you did.
Right. And I wanted something different. And
I felt very comfortable in New York and always
had, even when I was a kid, because our mom would
take us there. But I like that quote because
it takes a more positive spin. You're inspired
by the fear of being average. Yeah, if only you'd
thought about it like that back then. Right.
But nobody does when you're 16, 17 years old.
Yeah, nobody does. Nobody does. Yeah, defense
mode. Nobody's thinking about you. Nobody cares.
I don't think that quote said, nobody cares.
That's a different thinker. Nobody cares about
you, Carly. That's a mom, a lovely past time
from our mother. Nobody cares about you, Carly.
No, she never said that. She also said, nobody
cares about you. Nope. No, we just established
she didn't say that. This is too much thinking.
My brain's about to explode. She going, Kate,
I have to say this. I'm crying. I have to say
this next. Her tears have wiped away the makeup
under her eye. So this is a win. Andrew's texted
me twice. I'll answer it later. He needs the
easy pass. OK, he can come get it. He knows where
I am now. He found me. All right, I have to say
this the way it's written. I would hope so. Ready?
Sis. Some people are never going to clap for
you. I don't like how you said that. That was
a bad cold read. Please try it again. That's
why I had to move home from New York. I was never
good at cold reads. We'll see if you get the
callback. Nobody cares about you. Okay. Sis.
Already no. Sis. Try it again. Victoria. Okay.
Oh no. I'm dying. Sis. Okay. Some people are
never going to clap for you when anyway. Sorry.
Thank you. Thank you for the snip. Did it say
in parentheses sniff to make it more believable?
Got it. Those are the stage directions as she
slowly walks off stage left and does a slow clap
for myself. I mean, but that that's definitely
what that like clap for yourself. You don't if
you're expecting other people to clap for you
to get through it, then it's going to be way
harder to get through. And also people might
not show up for that. So don't do that. Well,
I don't worry about that. I think when you're
younger, you're waiting for. Approval or like
the what I can't think of words. Yeah, I can't.
I can't help you. You're waiting for that validation.
Validation from other people, but you just validate
yourself. Clap for yourself. You don't need anybody
to clap for you. Yeah, what she said. Agreed.
This is like sort of the same thing, but sort
of different. I'm definitely not clapping for
you. Don't worry about the people that aren't
happy for you. They aren't happy for themselves
either. Oh, mic drop burn. But again. No. Oh,
no, no. Don't do it twice. That's what a mic
drop is. But OK, yeah, keep going. Things that
you wish that you thought of in your 20s that
hit harder when you're in your 40s. But I like
this because all of this is more available to
kids in their 20s and their teens because of
social media. I didn't have an algorithm where
this would pop up for me. You'd have to go to
the self. help section of the library. Borders
or Barnes and Noble? Yeah, so the more you see
it, the more you believe it. Which was embarrassing.
Yeah. Oh, yeah. That aisle is like for some reason
has this taboo stigma. So like, of course, in
your 20s, you're not going to go get a self -help
book, which is all we had. So this is definitely
a better alternative of positivity in the social
media world. Yeah. And in terms of kids today
or younger people today. Adult babies. Adult
babies today. It's just the same people like
you see that they look at your stories But they're
never gonna like it or you see they look at your
post But they're not gonna like it because they're
not happy for you, but who cares they're they
may not be happy with themselves. They're looking
But let them let them let them You clap for yourself
you looking at who's looking at your stories
no, but I but honestly I do see people that constantly
look at our stuff and they will never like it
and it's people that we know very well. So that's
interesting. That's always been interesting to
me and always been like a thing for us. Sometimes
your closest people are not. No, sometimes your
biggest supporters are not your closest people.
Uh huh. Yeah. So, um, so yeah, I notice it because
when I'm quiet in my head, I notice everything
and I observe that you're quiet with your mouth,
but your head is never quiet. I can hear the
static from here. This one. Is your last one?
Yeah. And it's a thinker. Oh good. I don't know
if I want to end on, it's not negative, but I
know this is very me. Oh my God, just say it.
Okay. I know once I leave, I don't come back.
That's why I try so hard to stay. I have a problem.
I know, I'm not gonna leave on the negative one,
but I... Yep, I disagree. You disagree that I'm
like that? What? It's about me. Oh, I thought
this was a concept. How is this about you? I
know once I leave, I don't come back. That's
why I try so hard to stay. I know, once I die...
No. Oh. Not at all. Okay, then tell me more.
Think harder. But the children love the books.
Just think about a relationship, a friendship.
Okay. I don't cut people off, but once I leave,
it's very hard for me to come back, so I really
try hard to stay for as long as I can. Oh, yes,
yes, 100%. Do you know what I mean? I'm not really
ever mad at anybody that I cut them off, but,
you know, life. So that's... I do. Yeah. Ah,
you do. But you do. Yeah. You don't need to sit
at my table. You can eat. You don't sit at my
table. Yeah. Sis! Why are you not good at that?
I'm gonna end on a positive note. That one I
just like because that made me really think like,
whoo, that hit me hard. But I think that's an
attribute that you try and try again, but I do
think sometimes it's at your detriment. Yeah.
It's not at your benefit. Yeah. Anybody's not
just mine. But we're talking about you. And I
also thought it was about death. Because I know
you're afraid to die. And you don't want to die,
so you're trying to stay here a little bit longer.
That is not where that was going. But I disagree
that this is it. When you leave, this is it.
When you die, this is it. So I was like, no.
I think I'm thinking more and more that way as
I get older. Or I'm hoping. So since like two
weeks ago? Yeah. Since October. Pretty sure you're
afraid of that. Oh, wait, did I send you? No,
I sent Andrew and it was like just know that
when I die and it's like this happy couple and
it's like I'm gonna haunt the out of you and
it's like all these pictures of like demons under
the bed. It's just gonna be you saying Real Housewife
entrance quotes to everyone in their ear. That's
it. I am going to haunt the CRAP out of Andrew
when I die. when he kills me. You're haunting
him now. You won't answer him like you've already
ghosted him. Sorry to bother. I can't find my
wife. Now I feel bad for him. I can't find my
wife. I forget where my wife is. It's honesty.
He could have been like, Carly's completely left
and I don't know where she went. Last one. We're
gonna end on a positive note. I'm weird. I'm
real though. Why'd you say it like that? Sis.
She said I'm real. But I'm real though. Because
it's a picture of a black sheep in the middle
of all these white sheep and I was picturing
myself being the black sheep. You're a white
sheep. You fool. You basic sheep. You typical
average basic white sheep. If anything, cream
colored. That is the biggest insult you could
ever give me. You are not a black sheep. No,
I liked the quote. I was trying to pretend my
voice sounded like the black sheep. I am not
a black sheep. Success. Victoria is the black
sheep. I'm weird. I'm real though. I'm right
here. I'm weird. I'm right here. Something happens
to your jaw. I think it's because you broke it.
Be weird. Stay alive. What is it? Be rude. Be
rude. Stay rude. Be weird. Be rude. Stay rude.
Stay rude. Be real. Stay alive. No, be weird.
But I'm real, though. OK, well, we were saying
crime junkies, for those of you that know, and
also don't know, because we took that too far.
I have a t -shirt with that quote on it. I gave
it to you. Yeah. Yeah, I'm weird, but I'm real.
Same thing as my thinker last year. Awkward people
are just genuine. Yeah. So awkward is weird and
genuine is real Lewis Melody and Dean will call
Lewis weird and how all the time thank God I
don't know where he gets it from because I was
always super sensitive about being weird growing
up But he's like why is that a bad thing Lewis
will say that like it's great thing. What let
people let them call you weird who cares It's
not a bad thing. It's a great thing. You want
to be weird weird people are interesting and
weird people aren't really weird That's a thinker.
Ding, ding, ding. But yeah, I'm proud of that
nine -year -old who was like, and why is that
a bad thing? I'm weird. Yeah, good for him. Yeah.
I hope he keeps that, but that's, that's. Yeah,
maybe school those other two kids up. Maybe school
those other two kids. You lose insight of them.
Oh God, they're all weird and they're different
ways, but he's, you know. Well, that's how I
think part of school, that's part of age. We
all learned that at a young age. The weird kid
is the weird kid. Yeah. Usually the quiet, really
smart kid is the weird kid in school. Right.
Yeah. That's the truth. Louis draws at recess.
I don't think he does anymore. Not anymore, but
he draws at all times of the day on his tests
constantly. But think about, I can picture three
of the quote unquote quiet, weird kids from my
grade. I know their names. Yeah. And I'm pretty
sure they're all in tech. And successful. And
I want them to stay weird. We were at the bar,
and it was blaring music. At 10 o 'clock at night,
the band was playing, and he's sitting drawing
on his, you know, pad of paper. You guys are
really boring. That's all that tells me. Well,
the other two were playing arcade games, and
he was sitting there drawing a panda eating a
banana. And I was like, oh, cool. Yeah, they
won't be in tech. Nope. Maybe tech week. But
no. Oh, I asked him what he wanted to be when
he grew up. And he keeps saying actor. No. I
know. Andrew says no. I say do whatever you want.
But Andrew's like, no. But how can you say no
when both your parents were actors and your family
were all actors? Show him your work. Both of
you. Show him your work. He'll take it back real
quick. When his parents were actors, yeah, look
at him now. I'm dying. Show him your work. Successful.
Oh, God. Well, to be clear, he wants to be in
Star Wars. I told him I don't think they're making
any more movies. I thought he wanted to costume
Star Wars. He did, but now he wants to be an
actor in them. Guys, I've been crying so much.
Like, my nose is so stuffy. I'm crying so hard.
Your body's literally trying to let it go. Your
cup runneth over. Wait, I have to be quiet and
listen. I'm real though. Right, y 'all. I'm real
though. Wow. Was that your last thinker? Yep,
that was my last thinker. Very good. Lots of
thinkers. Lots of things to think about. Well,
yeah. Well, don't cry. You did it. You're successful.
You did it. You did it. You've bored my dog to
tears, but I'm still here. Oh, I wrote, I'm at
Victoria's literally recording. We just read
your text message on the podcast. He said, oh
good. Oh, I guess he doesn't need me that badly.
He didn't answer me. He didn't respond to me.
Pedro, did you answer me? No, he's tuned out.
Okay. He tuned out before you said, hey, answer
this Pedro. I'll get him later. Like, we're cool.
I also didn't tell him we were doing this. Oh.
I hope it works, because I can't do this again.
The mystery is how he knew we were doing it.
What a good producer. Maybe Andrew called Pedro
looking for me. It's very possible. Do you know
where my wife is? Sorry to bother. I forget where
my wife is. Oh, my God. Does he live with these
sheep? Does Andrew live with these sheep? I'm
weird, though. What? Nevermind. What? The sheep
on the picture. I'm weird, but I'm real though
was a picture of sheep with one black sheep in
the middle. Yeah. I was asking if they lived
with the sheep. No, we heard you. It was, it's
still not good. Think about it. Picture eyes.
I can't. Wipe your eyes. I can't. End this please.
End me. Oh no. He said I didn't tune out. Wait,
that's worse. He didn't answer. Bad Bunny. He
chose to forget you. That's my safe word. Carly
equals white sheep. There's an emoji of a white
sheep. Oh, I'm real though. He did say last week,
Bad Bunny is my safe word. Might've been the
greatest thing you've ever said of all time.
And I don't disagree. I don't get political,
but Bad Bunny's my safe word. I get political
bad bunny stoma is a word. Love it. I think when
I re -listened back I was like bad bunny bad
bunny when I felt unsafe. Victoria made me feel
unsafe. Yeah but have you seen the Have you seen
the videos of people being like it's not bad
bunny you white person is bad bunny. Oh my god
that's how Andrew says it. Bad Bunny. Yeah. Andrew
goes anytime I say, oh, like kids, like you want
to listen because we listen to Bad Bunny all
weekend. He was like, Bad Bunny. Bad Bunny. Yeah.
Yeah. He's German. Bad Bunny is all inclusive.
Bad Bunny is all inclusive. Bad Bunny. You are
a bad bunny. Oh, my God. We have to go. That
that was it for me. I have to redo my makeup.
You have to find your husband. Where the hell
is my husband? What is taking him so long to
find me? You could have gone into the song at
that part. We were doing it at the monologue.
Me? Me? Me? OK. Yep. Yep. We're right, y 'all.
You see my work. And we hope, oh my god, show
him your work. Never forget that. And when he
can't handle it. Remember, bed bunnies are safe
word. We hope you've also had some thought -provoking
thinkers from the internet. We promise not to
do this again. We can't promise that. We can't
promise that. But we will get other people to
bring in their thinkers. It is interesting to
see what is thought -provoking to different people.
And also the interpretations of different people.
You can read something and take it two different
ways. Yeah, I did that a lot today. That doesn't
make me right. But we did do that. So yeah, as
a reminder, per usual, this wasn't 20 minutes.
And we hope you remember that you're always fit
to be real and always allowed to be a little
extra. For legal reasons, we have to tell you
that this podcast is meant for entertainment
and educational purposes only. We are not healthcare
professionals. For all of your health, wellness,
fitness, and self -care needs, please refer to
the medical professional in your life, your primary
care physician, your therapist, a certified coach,
whoever it may be. and then let us know what
they say because I guarantee we need to know
it too. Okay? Okay, bye.