Welcome to Fit to Be Real. And a little extra.
I'm Victoria. Hey guys, I'm Carly. And this is
round two. Oh my god guys, you don't even know.
You don't even know. Tell them so they know.
Okay, we did this already. On Tuesday and today
is Thursday. And we realized from our, what's
his name? Producer. Producer. What? Not what's
his name, what was his title? That's what I meant.
I know his name, Pedro. at minute 56. He's gonna
be mad at you. Our producer at minute 56 decided
to chime in and say hey Carly's microphone's
been off the entire time. Technically I didn't
see the text message like 20 minutes before.
It doesn't matter. The first 30 minutes wouldn't
have been useful anyway. But my microphone was
off and we had this amazing conversation that
was unusable because it was only Victoria. And
then she was responding. You would not have heard
me at all. So Victoria was very angry. Very angry.
Our producer says, sounds good. So mad. His name
is Pedro. I meant what's his title, not what's
his name. There were emojis to be had. So we're
redoing it today. Because you know, we have all
the time in the world. Yes, we have nothing to
do. And we're going to try and make all the same
jokes and all the same conversation that we did
on Tuesday. I'm going to try and recreate it
just like my mom does for every picture she's
ever taken. Oh my God, you do the same thing.
Do it again, do it again. Manufacturing memories.
I feel like that's what you have to do as you
get older. You just have to tell people to do
things again so you can take a picture of it
because you're just, you get slower. I feel myself
getting slower on the snap. On the snap? Like
on the snap. Don't sports talk. That was my cool
way of saying, like on taking a picture. On the
snap, like I'm slower on the snap, you know.
Oh my God. You do get a picture out and then
you're like, oh, it's a video. She's 99 years
old. Oops. Or it's on me instead of facing the
other way. I am going to say this because I did
say this on Tuesday. We, I got a text message
from Stacey who is one of our C fit squad members.
What's up Stacey? And she thought of a really
good 2026 saying. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. So hold
on, hold on, hold on. Already, you didn't do
it again. Sorry. If you stayed tuned into the
very end of our previous episode, you heard Carly's
2026 catchphrase of the year, which was 2026,
don't be a little bitch. Kind of rhymes, kind
of doesn't. It's pretty, pretty Carly. Oh, it
rhymes. 2026, don't be a little bit. Don't be
a little bix. But it's fine. So this is Stacey's
version. Stacey texted and was like, I found
a good, I thought of a good one. And she said,
play no tricks in 2026. And I like that one too.
No tricks in 2026. Yeah. Tricks are for kids.
And we can't be having any more tricks. Good
cereal. That was my jam. Those commercials were
awesome too, with the bunny. Yeah, the bunny
and Trix berries. Yes, like berries it turned
your Unfortunate having to have milk in your
cereal bowl like different colors You gave that
to my children They hate milk in their cereal
I'm like, what do you want for breakfast? They're
like cereal no milk. I'm like, no, that's a cookie
So well, well, I don't understand why cuz they
grew up on almond milk. Yeah I didn't like milk.
That's true. I do have to put the least amount
of milk. They can't even taste it. It can't get
soggy. For them, it's got to be soggy because
they drank almond milk there unless they hate
almond milk as much as I hate cow's milk. Yeah,
maybe. She doesn't care. I don't. She will buy
27 gallons at one time, put them all in the refrigerator,
and then forget the next week that she has. Quite
literally, maybe five. Almond milk doesn't go
bad, right? Oh, Pedro is very upset. We are not,
what are they called? An expiration date family.
Yes. Mom would like find them, is it fuzzy? It's
good. It's good. Just take the bread, just cut
it off. Just cut the mold off the bread. That's
how we grew up. I mean, she's got leftovers from
when we were in high school in the fridge still.
And she's saving them. Do not go in there. I've
tried to redo the refrigerator. She knows what's
in there. She's got cans of V8 from when I was
trying to lose weight before the wedding 15 years
ago. Oh my god, I loved V8. And we lived on V8,
and it's still in there. Not V8. Splash. No,
V8 splash was my jam though. V8 tomato puree.
Yep. Basically. It was thick. It was thick. You
could probably put it in a can or on the stove
and make soup out of V8. And like dip a girl
cheese in there. Yes. Oh, that's so good. We
need a snowstorm so bad. Snowstorms are tacos.
Snowstorms are tacos, but It just reminds me
of that commercial with the snowman and he comes
in the Campbell's soup commercial with the tomato
soup and then the snowman melts and it's a really
a child. Yes, but he's having chicken noodle
soup. Oh shoot. Because he slurps the noodle
into his mouth. I can't get everything right.
I can't be good at everything. The operative
version is everything. You can't get anything
right. No tricks. That's what you're looking
for. No tricks 2026. Don't be a little bitch.
I think you could put them together. Play no
tricks you little bitch in 2026. Do you know
how hard it is to say that word and hear it coming
out of my mouth? I feel like a fish out of water
right now. I think that's why you're punching
the bee. She doesn't really know how to say it.
I don't because I don't say it a lot. To be fair.
Do we fail? She walked in today. I got it. I
have to. We have to talk about it. I knew you
were going to make fun of me. If you're not watching
and you're listening to us, we're going to need
you to take a moment and tune in to the YouTube
video. OK? And check out this outfit. OK? We're
going to start at the bottom. I approve of it
all, but it's just OK. It's what are those? They're
my Uggs. They're my Uggs. They're platform Uggs.
They go all the way up the leg. Thank god you
have long jeans on. These are my jeans from high
school. Belbada. Belbada, you were never this
skinny in high school. How are these fitting
you? They're a little baggy, actually. But I
kept them for a reason. They are my most comfy
jeans in the whole world. I don't know what that
means. Comfy jeans? These are like sweat. They're
actual jeans, they're not stretchy jeans. It
was before stretchy jeans were a thing. I know,
I just don't think jeans are comfortable, so
that's hard to believe. These are going to get
like holes in them at some point. Be buried in
them? Yeah. Like you know when they're so old,
they're gonna get holes in them and I'm gonna
have to throw them away. It's starting at the
bottom. See the bottom? Yeah, okay. So she's
got these jeans on from 1926 and now she's wearing
a three -quarter zip. Sweater. It says angel
around my doesn't matter. It is in gothic script
because it says angel because my mom calls me
an angel. She can't read it. So it's a gothic
script. She's not zipping the three quarters
up all the way up. Let the gold chain show. I
tucked it in. She straightened her blonde hair
and she was like, don't I look like what I wore
in the 90s? But none of this is what you were
in the 90s, except for the jeans. Don't you guys
don't I look like I should be strolling the Granite
Ron mall at the Deb and the Contempo? Your delco
is strong right now. She thinks she was vibing
with Avril Lavigne. Yeah, I was like, I look
so Avril today. And I think she looks like Eric
Matthews from Boy Meets World. Tell me I'm wrong.
She looked it. She said, you look like a guy
from the 90s. Who's that guy's older brother?
And I was like, what? I said the older brother
from Boy Meets World. She said Eric Matthews.
Remember nothing. You remember? Nothing. I think
I look like what the cool girls wore at the Granite
One mall. At the Melissa Etheridge concert. Correct.
Listen, I did love the Indigo Girls. I went to
a few Indigo Girls concerts growing up, so maybe
that's what I'm channeling. Yeah. All right.
So we're not talking about any of this today.
None. We have not segued well. We're not even
on track. She's not a good segueist. We're not
on track. How are we going to get out of this?
So what are we talking about today? Drum roll,
please. No, don't drum roll. Nevermind. None.
Wow. You are Eric Matthews. Oh, I'm sorry. I'm
enjoying my coffee and thinking about, you know,
579 and Contempo Casuals. You are not dressed
like those two stores. So I started a little
thing. What we're talking about is my health
and fitness journey that I am opening up for
you to also resonate with. Right now. All chosen
words. I'm the only one that knows about it.
I enjoyed that. I did DM you this morning. Did
you say it? Did you know? Yeah, yeah. I am her
only friend. And she is opening it up to have
more friends in the hopes that she can help somebody
else that is in... the mindset that you were
in. Okay, we have to backtrack. So I started,
I flipped the switch December 9th, 38 days ago
of completely fed up with what my body looks
like, how I'm feeling in it, and everything else
that wraps around with it, which I know is like
a universal feeling. So already you can resonate
with this, whoever's listening. Well, Carly means
she's my only friend. with absolutely no context.
I feel like they know. Is that I've done this
so many times with, well, Carly for one, since
2020, where we were each other's accountability.
I mean, this dates back to our Weight Watchers
at Kin's days. We always diet together. We've
been doing the, I mean, my first Weight Watchers
experience was when I was 10. And so it's been...
We've talked about that before we've done all
the diets yada yada yada yada. This is not what
I'm doing. It is not a diet I Had wine and beer
this past weekend and never wine and beer I wanted
a cookie Opportunity to present itself, but I
wanted to go she thought about it thought about
it. It just was out of reach so that it's not
a hundred percent just like being strict, it's
finding balance. I lost balance when I was very
sad for many years, which we talked about. And
then I lost balance when I am very strict with
the diet and can lose the weight, but I have
no life. Yeah, it's all consuming. It's all or
nothing. Yeah. Yeah. We go big or go home. And
then I've now regained all of it with being happy
in my life in a new relationship with new relationships.
you're going to gain weight. I think it's not
a happy relationship if you don't gain weight.
Yeah, because one, you're not being true to yourself,
and two, that's what you do. You go out to get
to know somebody, but what are you normally doing?
You're going out to eat. Yeah, or staying in
and ordering, or eating at a later time than
your normal schedule, than you normally would.
Or eating pancakes and sausage for two straight
years in a row. I was gonna bring it up. When
Carly and Andrew met, They would go to, was it
brunch? No, we would go to breakfast before our
auditions in the morning. So we would wake up.
Every morning? Go sign up three to five mornings
a week. And because we were so strict eating
growing up and like always on a diet because
we were actors and dancers, I was living on my
own for the first time and ordering what I wanted.
And it was pancakes. all the time. It showed.
Yeah. Oh my God. And he, we're still here 21
years later. Trying to get her to eat a pancake.
He tried to get me to eat a pancake this morning.
He did? Yes. He made pancakes for Dean and he
was like, you want one? And I was like, why would
you ask me that? No. Oh my God. I know the times
have changed, but anyway. We don't have enough
episodes in us to divulge and talk through you.
But that is so funny that you said that he asked
me to have a pancake this morning. Well, you
should have said yes. Listen. Poor guy's just
trying to go back in time when you were chill.
I was chill, but I gained 40 pounds. 40 when
I met him. I'm at 30. Yeah. I've gained 30 and
some change since July 2024. If you ask him,
he says it's not true. But it's all what you
feel in your body and I 100 % have. I can't fit
into my clothes in my closet. I don't want to
get rid of them because I'm cheap. And no, you
always say I'm going to fit in that again. I
still do it. I know. But it's also. Yeah, I mean,
yes, because I'm going to write. He just bought.
We're buying traveling outfits like when you
get off a plane or go on a plane and like you
want to look good. so we have these do they match
well he's his own color and then i've you know
my own color so no we don't match together so
yes yeah um but i don't know like being this
short i'm not going to dive into this too much
but being this short is if a large fits around
my waist and my butt it's way too long for me
yeah but a medium would be a little bit too tight
but it's the perfect line so he bought both so
i just tried them on and picked mine uh and we'll
return the other one But I forget why I was telling
you this. How did we get into this? He doesn't
see it. No, that was before. You gained 30 pounds.
Yeah. Wow. Be better. Come back. Oh my God. Not
telling me. You bought traveling outfits. Yeah,
but I forget why. He doesn't see it. No. You
gained 30 pounds. God damn it. I forget why I
was telling you this. Well, we'll figure it out.
You guys stay there. Well, hold on. It'll come
at some point. I have a feeling it has something
to do with not getting rid of, we were talking
about getting rid of clothes and not getting
rid of clothes. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Useless.
She's absolutely useless. Co -hosting a solo
mission. I'm a very good secretary. I'm a very
good secretary. Thank you, New Girl. Did you
notice my Pepperwood shirt? I did. I didn't say
anything about it, but I noticed. She's wearing
a full face of makeup as well. Thanks, Eric.
I just got all my, I just bought a bunch of makeup
online and it just came in before this and I
was like, oh, let me try it. So I'm ready for
the day. She's also, I brought that up because
she's feeling good right now. She's on a roll
and I feel like you should talk about that. Yeah,
we've digressed so many times and I'm really
upset as to why I can't remember. I told you
about these pants. But yeah, so we've been doing
this together forever, how long? And it works
and it would still work. But I think I've gone
into such an imbalance that I needed to kind
of elevate the accountability portion. So what
I've done is I've made an Instagram account,
which is quite literally the opposite of who
I am. An open journal, vulnerable thoughts, I'm
putting out posts, photos that I would never
deem acceptable to put out because we are way
harder on ourselves. It is out there in an Instagram
account for the public. It is not open to the
public right now, except for Carly, which is
why she's my only friend. Only friend. However,
she did not let me in on this until two weeks
into this process. So she was like, hey, I just
want to let you know, and I'll friend you. This
is what I'm doing. It's working. And I'm feeling
like this is a good thing for me. I actually
think it was like three weeks in. OK. It was
like right before Christmas and I was feeling
really good. Three weeks in I was feeling really
good. But let me tell you why it was quote -unquote
working or still is quote -unquote working. What
I'm doing in this is every day I wake up I post
my weight. I post my weight in a story and then
all of my stories that I post create into highlights.
So if you tune into this and want to check this
out and want to feel like someone else sees you
because you're feeling the same way or just want
to check it out every highlight is something
I log every day so I have one for my weight which
started at 177 .6 and I have one for my daily
menu everything I've eaten I've taken a picture
of I have written down in meal snack time increment
form and then only tracked macro wise my protein
calories I know what I'm doing but protein is
what I think I've missed the boat on especially
as you you age and you do weights and I don't
eat meat other than fish and plant -based products.
So like my protein really dipped in the past
two years, three years. So that's my main, my
main tracking macro. And then every day I post
my workout and or if I'm resting that day or
actively resting, i .e. just walking my dog.
Every day I walk my dog, but I don't track that
because that's just like a life habit. That's
something that I'm going to do no matter what
size I am and no matter what I've eaten that
day. But there are some days where every other
Sunday I may just walk the dog because Carly's
teaching and I'm not. It's my first day of that
week to not work out. I will say that she does
post her weight even when it goes up. Yep. And
not just when it goes down, which I think is
very hard. There are many days, especially over
Christmas, that I didn't want to do it and I
wanted to lie and I wanted to not even step on
the scale to know. It's not because I went off
the boat. It's not because I Completely ruined,
you know a meal or because I you know had my
period which we'll talk about But I did it anyway,
I just did it it was it was a hard time of doing
this over the holidays and then the New Year
week and then What happened if the oh then I
got my period then I got injured So my workouts
really plummeted because I couldn't move. And
so you'll see that in the reflection of all of
my daily weigh -in logs. Because that's real.
Like, you don't start something and then immediately
drop 20 pounds. No. That's just not healthy.
And anybody that says it is, it's going to come
back with a vengeance, which we've talked about.
No, but I did lose a lot of weight pretty quickly.
So if I went from 177 right before Christmas,
I think I went down to 160, which I have not
seen that number in almost a year and a half.
Yeah, that's true. And that's a lot of weight
for a very short amount of time. So along with
my stories and my highlights, I have actual posts
that will stay up forever of insight. on like
why these things happen because in real time
they were happening to me and I was doing the
research and wanting to understand what was going
on so you lose a lot of water and then your body
has to basically sit there in waiting being like
prove this that this is real like continue this
yeah months and months and weeks and weeks and
then we'll start losing like fat and it doesn't
really take that long but to a degree the drama
of it is that you have to prove to your body
that you're committed to this before the fat
cells start to shrink so the body kind of holds
on and it's like all right well we're gonna keep
this big circle of a fat cell but we're gonna
fill it up with water and then we're gonna start
taking that water away okay you're kind of proving
it okay cool all right oh you're really into
this we're gonna start shrinking that big circle
of a fat cell and now we're gonna lose fat and
the fat's not gonna come back because that cell
is now gone. It's completely disappeared. It's
something called the fat whoosh. And so I have
a whole post on that. I have a whole post on
PMS and what the heck happens and why does the
scale go up seven pounds when it's not real.
And then everything that comes along with that
because for women, Sorry Pedro, but for women
it's very different process and calorie wise
and metabolic rate wise like everything is different
for us and a big part of that though is PMS and
all the things that come with it So there are
there are other things to read in and among that
which is the hardest part None of this is hard
posting my weight not hard But the journal entry
stuff is hard, what do you mean? So I have posts
of just like post -holiday all of my thoughts
of my frustration of what happened and how I'm
feeling and why it feels like this or oh my gosh
I made it through the holiday and I didn't do
nearly as much quote unquote damage of just giving
up and being like I'm gonna eat all the cookies
I think I went into class during that midweek
of Christmas to New Year and everybody was talking
about like, oh my gosh, we had so, this is a
good dessert, this pie, this, this. And I was
like, you know what? This wasn't a dessert Christmas
this year. They weren't that good. Ouch, I had
a lot of the parties. Yes, but I brought a lot
of the dessert. Yeah, well Victoria Victoria
does the baking and all the dessert bringing
Yeah, you're right. A lot of them were like the
Costco cookies. Yeah. Yeah, so it was not It
wasn't a homemade I have to have this cake Christmas.
Not important. It wasn't Worth it. It wasn't
worth it. And I'm a someone that's like I don't
care I'm go we come from Carmella who will I
you know eat a sleeve of Oreo cookies exactly
and not think twice and then which is like the
worst and waste of sugar and calorie. Well, now
that I read that the cream is basically just
glue, we don't eat Oreo cookies anymore. I mean,
the package says causes cancer. Yeah. Read the
package. But to us, that's, you know, we weren't
allowed to eat, not weren't allowed. We were
of the belief that potatoes were really fattening.
But on Friday nights, we would have Elio's pizza
and dip Chips Ahoy cookies and cool it. Oh, that
was so good. Which I would do again if we got
to go back and do it, but the mindset of what
was good and what wasn't good. Right. So for
me, any dessert, I'm like, yeah, give it to me.
It's chocolate. I want it. I don't care if it's
good or not. And this Christmas, I was it was
just a different thing. So my whole post on the
mindset. Mindsight. No mindset mindset in hindsight.
Oh, my God. Of the holiday. was how proud I was,
even though my weight went up. I was very proud
of myself for the choices that I made, because
it's such a weird week of get togethers. I don't
really eat that, but that's what you're offering?
And it's there. OK, and it's there. Or it's just
freaking there. Carly's house is the house of
Willy Wonka at all party time. There's always
Dot's Pretzels out, or Christmas crack. I didn't
have one Dot's Pretzel. See, and I am, and I
think Victoria's better at it than I am. Once
I start, I can't stop. And I am so happy that
my mom gave me that special talent. Oh, me too.
If I start it, it's over. I should have put that
as well as many other things in my special talents
on my resume. Once I start eating something,
I can't stop. Watch me. Just watch me. Put some
dots pretzels in front of me and watch me go.
Except it was back then, so it was the peanut
butter pretzels. Oh, god. But she still is obsessed
with it. Yeah. And peanut M &Ms. It just, if
I start, I can't stop. And that, I can. No, I
can't. It's an addiction. Yeah. Sugar's an addiction.
And we have that in our blood. We just do. And
it comes from karma. Thanks, mom. Cool. But.
Have a whole post. Yeah on on how I felt about
that recently I think my latest post was just
me typing and it was just kind of like thought
vomit of What it's like Like I basically wanted
to just erase all the work that I've done Create
a brand new account start over because I didn't
want to show that like I lost I went down to
160 and my goals like 145 150 like I'm doing
great. Oh, but the holidays Oh, but the injury.
Oh, but the period where I Made worse choices
for myself and the scale kept going up, but I
didn't because I think that's the real part of
this is that All of us have done this and or
are going through it right now again in their
journey. I can't believe I've let this happen.
I can't again. I have gained weight. I can't
believe it's this hard now that I'm in my late
30s. That's my biggest I have off to do a post
about that because I think about that all the
time. They've always warned at some age. It's
usually a in your 30s number, your metabolism
changes. I didn't think it could because we have
horrible metabolisms. But it got worse. It's
gotten slower. And my choices are not as bad.
But my body needs me to work for it harder. And
that's just age. And that's just how it goes
to a degree. So it's a struggle. And I did say
on Tuesday when we did this the first time, We
know how hard it is for you because we do this
for a living and it's hard for us. So I think
another reason that this Instagram account is
so helpful for others is to see like, oh, she
struggles with it. So then I don't feel so bad.
Maybe this resonates with me. This doesn't resonate
with me. I do this. Maybe I don't do this. Just
you can find like a common something. that everybody
goes through this, everyone, no matter what.
If you're in the fitness industry, if you are
in nutrition, it happens to everybody. And it's
hard, I'm going to say it again, to get up there
in front of a lot of people when you're feeling
not great and doing what we do. And I think this
is going to be helpful to know that there is,
you know, there's something behind that. When
we're teaching, that you might not want to be
up there in front of a lot of people when you're
not feeling your best. That was last night for
me. Really? Yeah. Was I with you? Yeah, yeah,
yeah. We were together. Yes. OK. Sure were. Yeah,
I didn't feel good. It's like no matter what,
I think for everyone, once you hit a certain
time in the day, bloat just happens because you've
eaten how many meals and you've done how many
activities or maybe you've been sedentary all
day or you've had too much water or maybe you
didn't have enough there's so many reasons and
I was feeling so good yesterday got to my chiropractor
I felt even better and then something Happened
around the four or five o 'clock p .m.. And I
had to eat something real quick before teaching,
but I felt bloated I felt gross so why don't
you tell everybody what you ate like you told
everybody last night It was a tuna packet which
is 17 grams of protein eats that before teaching
a jumpy class One scoop of protein powder that
I drank that was 20 grams of protein and then
a quarter cup of walnuts Which was 4 .8. No one
cares. Who eats tuna before teaching a dance
fitness class? What did you? What would have
you wanted me to repeat? I don't know. I don't
know. What would you want me to have eaten? Not
tuna. Did it bother you? The thought did. No.
Your outfit bothered me. But I didn't feel good.
The shirt that I had on was the shirt I wore
all day because it was the Wednesdays are the
longest day and I don't get to change and do
stuff. And I wish I had packed another shirt
and then I was bloated. It was clinging to my
fupa. And there was just like so many things.
Say that again, please. My fupa? Come on, we
all know what that is. But I felt horrible. And
I felt sluggish. And then my back hurt. And then
there's so many things. don't stop the party
and you pick up your knee, let's go. I'm looking
at myself in the mirror going, my God, stand
up taller, suck it in, fix your shirt. So there's
so much going on. Do you want to hear a secret?
I felt the same way last night. I know you guys
don't believe me. Don't make that face. Don't
make that face. Walk in somebody else's shoes.
Walk in these clod hoppers. You don't want to
walk into a - mental disorder. No, I was feeling
bloated too. I do what you do and I was feeling
bloated too. No, but when you do, I didn't feel
good. I had just chugged water. I had eaten dinner
before the class cause I teach till nine and
I was like looking at myself in the mirror, seeing
something that maybe other people don't see,
but I was seeing it. Yeah, right. The entire
billions of people population don't say it, but
you are correct. I was not feeling good because
I wasn't either and you're not me. And I was
like, shut up. You're fine. Just keep going.
And I think I literally said to everybody, shut
up. You're fine. Just keep going. You're so annoying.
The difference that you need to understand is
that you were this weight and at this weight
in a different phase of your life, you would
never be able to wear the crop top. No. And be
like, I don't feel good, but I'm in a crop top
because I still can. That's where it's different.
Well, I did teach. I'm going to tell you, my
highest weight, I was 212 pounds and I was in
front of people teaching. I, the only difference
was I don't ever remember not being happy. Like
I've told Christina, a million times, I was happy.
I was heavy, but I was happy. Is this post -Melody?
Yeah, this was after Melody. I was happy. Are
you going to say because I was pregnant? It's
different. It's different. Yeah. You were that
big because you had a child. Yeah. You brought
a child into the world. It's not the same, but
it's valid, and it's completely justified. Well,
I think what I mean to say was I was happy, I
didn't feel good. Right. I didn't feel good.
I was 212 for Dean. I was more for Melody. Post
-birth? Yeah, I came - Well, no. When I left
the hospital for Dean, I was 208 pounds and I
was like, wait a second, he wasn't a four pound
baby. He was over eight pounds or seven pounds.
Like what, how did, what? That's like, I don't
know, there's so many. How did I do that? Water.
But I was, I was over 200 for all three of them.
So like, yes, you're right. You're right. I was
heavier because I had a baby, but yeah. And then
two more. Yeah. It is it's not I agree. It's
not invalid cuz like you feeling Crappy about
yourself now in moments of like oh my god such
a long day Why can't I hold my stomach in or
are very accurate? for you and your mental illness
but You're, yes, yes, it's all valid. It's all
valid for whatever reason anybody gains weight
or loses weight or feels bad or feels good. It's
all valid, but it's not the same for us. Like
we can't compare because I've never been heavy
because I had a baby. I've been heavy because
I've been sad or I've been happy or I've been
just eating poorly and life is life. The reasons
are different. I think you're correct. I've never
been heavy and sad. I've been very heavy and
happy. Right, right, right, right. And tired
from babies. And well, no, no, no, before baby,
I was very heavy and happy. Yeah. Because I was
with Andrew and we were going around New York
City, drinking and eating and living life. All
you can eat. What was the Asian noodle brunch
spot downtown? Oh, God. Remember that place?
Yeah. It was like a noodle. house but it was
Asian. They let you drink all you wanted and
they didn't ID because it was all college kids
at NYU. I mean we were living our best life and
mom always likes to say you lived the life that
I couldn't afford in New York but mom was auditioning
and I was like I'm not auditioning I'm living
I'm living a really fun life of eating and drinking
with my friends. It was like a three dollar bowl
of like noodles. Yes it was so good um but yes
so I don't know what it's like to be heavy and
sad. It's almost like you have, there's a piece
of society that you have more of an allowance
at that time to be heavy because you had a baby.
Right. It's like, oh, but you had a baby. That's
amazing. If you have weight on you and there
are no children involved, You're just fat right
like figure it out. Yeah, right And I say all
of that in sarcasm and jest because I don't agree
with it, but there is definitely You have the
allowance. Uh -huh. I agree. I don't know why
just how like our brains are wired or conditioned
to but Yeah, I don't know no doesn't that doesn't
make me feel anything towards you it's just when
you try to relate you can't Okay, well, I'm your
only friend on Instagram right now, so you better
be nice to me or I will just slam you with nasty
DMs, which I have been doing already. You mean
private DMs no one else can see? Yes, I will
comment on her DMs and be like, ew, gross. Oh
my god. Boy, back to the task at hand. So this
this accountability account also does my progress
photos. So by the time this comes out, the ones
I took on Tuesday, I I will put out there. Were
you not happy? It's not that I'm not happy because
I'm doing the work. So I know at some point visual
change will happen and then I already feel better
internally. So like it's like they're just not
matched up yet. Well, say it again. You're doing
the what? The work. Say it again. The work? The
people in the back. Oh, it's hard. It's hard
work. Yeah. It's freaking hard. Yeah. Every choice
has to be accounted for. Every choice is an important
one for putting any type of snack, food, meal
in my mouth. I take a picture if we're at a restaurant.
I take the picture. You don't care. So when we
did an accountability program, so many people
would be like, well, I'm out with friends. OK,
take a picture. Take a picture. If this is what
you want, you will do it and you will succeed
because it's what you want. So if your priority
is not not doing this in front of other people,
then it's not your priority. Right? Like your
health is first, your body is first, your choices
are first. Everything else comes second. So,
and I just happened, which what we talked about
on Tuesday, I happen to have the support in all
facets. All facets. From the guy who cannot be
named. Because she forgot it. No, the support
in any version of your home life, whatever that
looks like is paramount. It just, it does, it
just is whether it's like What kind of meal?
Can you eat this? Would you like to eat this?
I'm going to cook that like that type of support.
And also, I think you said it like we were at
a you're at my house. Yeah. Yeah. For you know,
in between Christmas, when everybody's at my
house, she grabbed a Like a handful. I didn't
even know she was doing this at this point. She
hadn't even told me. It was before Christmas.
It was before. Yeah. And she grabbed a handful
of something and he said, are you going to take
a picture of that? And I knew what that meant
because we take pictures of our food and send
it to each other. And I was like, oh, wait, I'm
on the outs. She's sending pictures to him now
and not me. No, no. But I knew what that meant.
And she was like, yeah, yeah, I already took
a picture of it. And that was it. And that was
just me creeping and eavesdropping on their conversation.
It was probably Andrew's Christmas crack. Oh,
so good. But that was him not judging, trying
to help. Because what if you had said, no, I
didn't, and you know what? I really don't want
it. Because I don't want to take a picture of
it. Which is why I didn't have the cookie this
weekend. Because I was like, eh, it's not worth
the work. And I was so happy that I did that.
I had the beer though, and I took a picture.
So I think what she's saying is you can live
your life as long as you take accountability
for it. You can, and she took accountability
for herself, and then let me in on it. I'm gonna
say that again. She let me in on it after the
fact. She did not discuss with me before. Just
again. Wait, here's the reason. I wanted, it
had to be about me. For me. It had to be for
me. I couldn't have. I don't like the reason
why I couldn't have help. No, no, no. Not that
it was going to turn into something about you.
It just it had to be like I was so fed up that
I was like, what what can I do that's different
than I've done before? But it's going to last
for me or that's going to really click. Yeah,
because I mean, ask Pedro for the year and a
half that he's now known me and like knows me
well. I've said, we're going to start eating
better. We're going to start making these decisions.
We have to stop eating at this time. Let's start
meal prepping. All of these let's go do, or I'm
going to do this. And then I never followed through.
So I needed for the first however long to prove
to myself that I could do it without help, but
in the lifestyle that I have. Yeah. And she decided
to start it at Christmas. That's when I got fed
up. I looked at myself in the mirror, working
out by myself. on a Tuesday morning, December
9th. Okay. And I couldn't, I couldn't take it
anymore. Like I couldn't believe what was looking
back at me, even though I look at myself every
day. It's just that that, whatever that was in
that moment, I was like, here it is. And I started
taking progress photos right then and there in
a t -shirt and leggings, not like what you normally
do in a bra or something where you can really
see change. That's the first progress photo.
and I made an account. And I didn't tell Pedro
either. Pedro didn't know. I did it for like,
I think, a week and a half before I was like,
I'm taking pictures of food. Here's why. Yeah.
Yeah. So we have an accountability program Victoria
and I created over COVID. And we used to send
each other pictures of our food, all of our meals.
We followed our accountability program as well.
That's how we lost all the weight that we lost.
And to this day, I mean, I think recently we
stopped sending pictures because we aren't good
coaches for each other. Not anymore. Not anymore.
There was a time where we were on par, but we're
now in different. I think it's because we're
also in different phases of this for ourselves.
Right. We are both not trying to lose a ton of
weight at the same time, which we were in in
the beginning. It was together. It was like we
had the same type of goal. Yeah. For even if
it was an individualized. we needed to lose weight,
feel healthy, and be better for our jobs and
for our life. And now you're in maintenance,
and I need to lose. But that doesn't mean we
couldn't have still done it. Also, our phones
are geriatric, and Carly's is always dead. She's
like, I've been sending you pictures of my food
for two weeks. And I was like, oh, my phone's
been dead. I'm like, I know. But it was kind
of nice. Nobody was responding. Well, that was
your first go at an accountability. Yeah, but
I would take a picture of something really bad
and be like, she's not going to look. Oh, well.
Doesn't matter. So it just, it had to be different
this time. And at the same time, the same as
in accountability. Like, I think that's the key.
And we say that all the time. What? Your straw
from your coffee is in your hair. That's what.
Gross. I always say consistency is key and accountability
is key, and those two things worked. Consistency
is key, accountability is key, and those things
worked for me. Oh, why did there have to be a
shoulder show with it? She danced through the
rhyme. Because I got so excited that my third
line was going to rhyme and I didn't mean it
to that I had to show a little shoulder. Oh,
Eric, stop. But yeah, I think those things are
what works. It works for us. Maybe doesn't work
for you. But you know, if you might want to check
out, she's letting she's letting friends look
at her account now. Well, now it's to the now
it's to the part where. Not even, hold on, the
beginning decision. I think we talked about this
Tuesday. She can't remember what we said four
seconds ago, but she can remember a lot of things
from Tuesday. Word for word. I had so many jokes
to tell. Is that I work better for me if others
get something from it as well. So for me, I need
to do this accountability. and the public part
of it, that it could help someone else who is
like in the same phase of like, oh my God, I'm
fed up. It can help them and that actually helps
me more. Yeah, that's like the reward. Not only
the getting healthy and the losing weight, but
the worth it part is that you find something,
you meaning you guys. find something as a takeaway,
even if it's only one thing. And, you know, you
like to help people. I like to help myself. But
that's not true. I know we said this the other
day. You know, and I didn't agree with it then.
Yes, you did. But I lied. I need to do things
for myself first and make sure that I'm OK. She
will make sure everybody else is OK first. And
I think that's where that comes from. Like helping
somebody else. is part of your reason for doing
this because you know how many people struggle
with this. Well, and on the daily, we see it,
we hear it in conversation at like right before
class. You're like, oh, my gosh, I know it's
so hard, but you're here. You're doing it. You're
doing great. You made the you did the hard part.
So there's so I think. The volume of women that
I know struggle with, I'm up, I'm down, I'm up.
and happy I'm down I'm sad I'm trying to lose
because I have an event and it's not working
or it is working and it worked and now I've gained
all my weight back like it's life it's life which
is why I didn't delete this when I was gaining
gaining gaining gaining I'm now back on the down
post new year and injury that was really the
past week kind of threw me but I still did it
and I kept going yep so now I'm on the way back
down slowly a lot slower than the first time
I started losing and losing, but it's happening.
And so I think, I think if that helps one person
start and then maybe tune in and check in with
me, I'll respond. Like, I don't know, I haven't
thought past doing it for myself. So if you're
going to follow or friend or... on anything I've
posted or anything, I think it's gonna be a back
and forth. I think I will, I don't know. I think
we can make it some sort of, okay, you do it
too. I'll hold you accountable. I don't know,
we'll see. I'm not sure. So also, we are not
what I eat in a day people. Do not look at her
menu and what she eats and think that that's
gonna work for you. It's not. It's not. We don't
like those posts that say, this is what I eat
in a day because not one of them are real, okay?
And same for her. What works for her is not gonna
work for you. But also, nothing's gonna change
if you don't change. And that was a big thing
we said on Tuesday that I was like, we need to
say that again because we have people constantly
coming in. I work out seven days with you and
I eat pretty well. Why isn't this working? Because
you need to recheck your nutrition, triple check,
quadruple check, because what you think you're
eating that's really good is probably not. And
that's why it's not working. You can work out
hard. I was the biggest example. So were you.
We worked out hard 23 hours of the week teaching
and didn't lose a pound. No, because we were
eating more than we were burning. And your body,
there's so many reasons. I have it in a post.
Yeah. Because how many times have we done this?
We're in our 40s, almost in our 40s. Figure out
which one's which. Shut up. And this is not my
first like. It's not her first rodeo. Rodeo.
It's not. But it had to be different from all
the other times because this. This phase is different,
and this time it's different. I'm different as
a human and as a person, so it's not going to
work the same that I did in 2020. Right. She
was 30 when she lost a bunch of weight the first
time. You're now 37. Your body is completely
different. Yeah. Yes. So that's a big thing,
and she's got to change. Something that she's
doing is not working for her. So same with you.
If you don't change it, it's... You can't eat
like you're 21. People do that. I talk to people
all the time about that in my one -on -one with
clients where it's like, OK, cool. That's your
goal. Awesome. Well, what are you eating? Well,
what are you doing? OK, well, what are you willing
to change? No, nothing. It's not that bad. It's
just this little. It's this little. If I don't
do that, then I'm sacrificing everything. It's
like, well, something's got to change. It's you
know, you got to amp up your activity. You got
to you know change the Specific calories you're
taking in. I mean everybody's different So I
don't want to say like trigger words of specific
things for you to think that that's what you
have to do But for me, I have to stop eating
late Yeah, and I have to stop eating so early
and then I have to eat actual meals I wasn't
eating enough and I was gaining weight because
what I was eating Was healthy enough. It was
healthy ish But I wasn't eating enough calories.
So your body goes, okay. Well, you don't feed
me so I'm gonna hold on to everything you're
putting in right and continue to add up until
the day you just stop feeding me and then I have
storage for later and That happened month after
month after month after month and 30 pounds later.
I am where I am. Yeah, and You know life changes
my life situation changed. I have partner now
that really likes food and and good food and
restaurants and ordering and I want to eat the
noodle bowls all the time too but my body can't
do that and I was keeping up with with him on
my own terms you didn't know what I was doing
yeah but I was like yeah I want noodles too cuz
I do I want them but I have to be smart about
it and I have them right I'm making pasta tonight
it's veggie craft protein pasta. And it tastes
so similar to real pasta. And it's 12 to 17 grams
of protein for like, the same portion of pasta.
So like you find what works. And then I feel
good about it because I didn't want to go strict
again. And hello, Peppers joining the couch.
I didn't want to go so strict again like we did
in 2020 as if I didn't have plans and places
to go. We didn't. It was COVID. We didn't leave
our house. All Victoria and I did was sit at
my house, think about what we were going to make
for food and go over the nutrition part of it
and then teach for CFIT. And work out. And work
out. That's all we did. We didn't see anybody.
We didn't have events. And we know that people
thought it was harder. We thought it was amazing
for our plan. And when I started gaining, I was
like, I'm never going to get there again because...
life is never going to stop like that again.
So that's not in the cards for me. And that's,
it's not true. So it's what I told myself. And
then I was like, yeah, sure. What are we, what
are we doing for takeout? And I would make like
a silly decision for my body because I just told
myself I was never going to get to 2020 again.
And I don't want to get to 2020 again. I want
to do life right now, but I have to find the
balance. So this account for me is the balance
and the start of like, life. And I want to say
it again. It is hoard. It is hoard work. And
if you're not willing to change what you're doing,
cause it's not working for you right now. If
you're looking at her account, trying to find
ways for her, you know, to take some tips, then
what you're doing isn't working for you. You
have to change something. Yeah. And that is number
one, the hardest flip. Nope. The hardest switch
to flip. Yeah. Flip to switch. I do that all
the time. Um, so if you've made it this far in
our, our rant, the account is fit to be, get
it, underscore V, get it, underscore dedicated.
And I went through a bunch of like, what, what
kind of handle? I don't know. First of all, I
wanted to be discreet, find me doesn't have a
picture. So it's, I know, I know it's not a hundred
percent yet, but fit. to be underscore v underscore
dedicated because i have not been dedicated to
myself i've been dedicated to you i've been dedicated
to them i've been dedicated to him i've been
dedicated to my dog i haven't dedicated the past
year and a half didn't point to me nope it was
there with the middle finger yeah um So it's
dedicated because motivation is not what does
this. Dedication is what does this. And through
the holidays, I stay dedicated and I'm proud
of myself for that. And through a back injury,
I stay dedicated and I'm proud of myself for
that. And so it's going to end up continuing
because of dedication, not motivation. So fit
to be me, which could be very or Victoria dedicated.
Oh, that was my thought. That was cool. I like
that. And you know, we're doing it here, so fit
to be. Well, I will not be her only friend anymore
and I'm sad about that. She did nothing. She
helped me in no way. I checked it every day and
you saw that I looked every day. I know, but
that, yeah. And I texted, I DM'd you this morning
and was like, whoa. The other day I saw what
she ate and I was like, gross. There are some
things I just eat to eat and it is pretty nasty.
But it's calories and it's nutrients and I don't
really care how it gets in. It's just gonna come
out anyway. It's hard work. It's hoard. It's
hard to hear about. I'm just kidding. But if
you really wanna make a change, friend her. Gonna
make a change. Once in my life. It's gonna be
real good. Gonna make a difference. Gonna make
it right. Oh, I thought we were gonna keep going.
I couldn't remember the words. That's Celine.
We're doing Michael. Celine is everywhere. Anyway,
check out her Instagram. We can all be friends
together. So yes, if you have been a seafitter
for a long time, then you've unbeknownst gone
through the journey with me just by watching
my body change in the past decade alone. seven
years, I guess, alone. So now it's like the inside
scoop of it. I also have to say, I don't care
if you don't fight. I'm doing this either way
and I don't care. I don't think this is important.
What? The world needs to know. You know what
I mean? She doesn't care if she has five followers.
Cause she only has one right now. This isn't
about like, let's get out there and let's do
it this way and let's get more followers. I don't,
it's no, this is a 100 % and you're going to
see by the fact that I'm, I post my weight and
everything else that comes with it. I think my
next progress photo is alarming for me, but I'm
going to put it out there because I have to,
to keep going that it is that's Not the part
of this, right? We didn't do a podcast because
we think we're like the most important people
ever. No, no. Well. Oh, no, no. So I just have
to say that because this is the hardest part
for me is just the vulnerability aspect. It's
not like the facts and the facts is my weight
and the facts is what I'm eating and the facts
is what I'm doing for my workout every day or
not doing for my workout every day and posting
the progress. But the vulnerability of it is
like how I feel about it, which is what I'm putting
out there is what is very uncomfortable. So the
discomfort is also, I think, a part of this whole
journey and might be what you're missing because
you want to be comfortable. So we can chat about
it. Yeah. All right. That's a first for her.
Usually she says, don't come up to me and talk
about anything that I've talked on this podcast.
Well, wait, that's another reason I didn't tell
you. and didn't make it public from the start.
I didn't want people talking to me about it.
I wasn't ready for it. I didn't know. I didn't
know. I didn't know what I was doing. I didn't
know how it was going to work. I didn't know
if it was something that was going to stick anyway.
Maybe I would just delete it and do it a different
way. So now it is what it is. And yeah, you can
come up and talk to me about it. Don't talk to
me about my feelings, but you can come up and
talk to me about everything. Sorry, there's no
disclaimers. There's no, no, it's all or nothing.
All right, fine. Okay, it's a sleeve of Oreos
or it's none. All right, fine. Okay, that's where
we are here. I'm surprised it's only one sleeve.
I've been known to have a little more than one
sleeve, but that's all I'm ready to talk about
right now. I get it. She's never gonna be ready.
Just to let you know, she's never gonna be ready.
So, to end this because she needs to go back
to TGIF. 1999. What's that song? I just wanna
go back, back to 1999. Whoa, whoa. We're making
up this song. Whoa. No, there's a song. I know.
I just wanna go back, back to 1999. Back to 1999.
Why is that a, yes. Who sings it? It's like Robin
or. It's not Robin. It's like someone like Robin.
Your computer is going to die. We got to go.
Low battery. Yeah, I forgot to charge it. But
the microphones have been on. So we're at the
win this week. But yeah, so that's that's our
spiel. That's our thing. And by our I mean mine.
Well, I'm in it too. Carly. I'm her friend. You
will see Carly's friendly posts as well. I'll
start commenting. So if this works for you, this
resonates for you, then by all means reach out.
And if it doesn't, cool, but it does, I know
it does. So remember, listen, it resonates, hold
on, it resonates for me. Do you want to tell
us more about that? No, I just want you to know
there's something in this for everybody I totally
understand this and I've done this with her Yeah,
not in a public Instagram way But I've felt very
vulnerable texting her my weight and what I eat
and all the stuff So I it resonates with me.
So it resonates with everybody. Yeah Also, yeah,
it's Instagram, by the way. I just came at the
camera like if you're not watching. Oh, wow.
Now it's 2004. I'm included. Include me. I'm
not gonna come. Just include me. Carly's a pick
-me -girl. I just learned what those are. What?
That's old news. Oh. Fina! Just remember, you're
always fit to be real and always allowed to be
a little extra. For legal reasons, we have to
tell you that this podcast is meant for entertainment
and educational purposes only. We are not healthcare
professionals. For all of your health, wellness,
fitness, and self -care needs, please refer to
the medical professional in your life, your primary
care physician, your therapist, a certified coach,
whoever it may be. And then let us know what
they say because I guarantee we need to know
it too. Okay? Okay, bye.