Welcome to Fit to Be Real.
And a little extra.
And a year later.
Woohoo! One full year.
52 straight weeks.
No breaks. No breaks. We did not take one rest week.
We did not take one week off. We did it.
We did bonus episodes. We did.
It was a year. It was a jam-packed podcast year.
And some weeks were harder than others.
It was not all.
Rainbows and sunshine.
No, no. But we did it.
Yeah.
I'm not surprised, but I am surprised.
Like, I'm not surprised because when we set our minds to do something, like, we do it.
So, that's fact.
But I am surprised in two weird ways that it went so fast
and that I can't believe it's been a year.
I can't believe it's been a year since you said,
hey, we're starting a podcast next week.
I made the name and this is what we're going to talk about.
And, okay, let's do it.
We tend to do that.
We don't think we do.
It's worked for us for the most part.
In everything that we do.
We just sort of go all in and then if we fall, we fall.
But when you go all in, you sort of go all in.
Oh, wow.
Your insights in this past year have just been
mesmerizing.
You know what I mean.
When you go all in on something, you're going hard.
You're not going home. Is that better?
I think more times than not, we are, oh, I want to do this.
Okay, I'm going to do this. Oh, I'm doing this tomorrow.
Like, that's it.
So, that's how mom is, I guess.
And it's definitely how our brother is.
Yeah. And that's how dad is.
Dad will make it onto the podcast next year.
Yeah, 2024, dad is your year.
Woohoo, he is the original podcaster.
I mean, the fact that we have taken, schedules are hard.
It's the scheduling issue, but he has a lot of insight on all this too.
He's a lot of hair. He's got a lot of insight.
His hair is legendary.
He's the same way. When he gets fixated on something, he has to finish that.
At that moment.
At that moment, whether it takes him 14 hours or not.
So, we all have this train of not thinking enough,
but then overthinking way too much.
But you know what? If you really want to do something,
sometimes I think the best policy is to just go for it.
There is maybe a benefit, I'm sure Andrew is the opposite of us,
to planning ahead, writing down, making sure it's going to work.
And then going after it, there's definitely benefits to that too.
We're just not built that way.
Well, yes and no.
We balls to the wall for the podcast, but every single week we research.
We balls to the wall. Yeah.
We balls to the wall. It's in past tense.
So, there's a D. We balls to the wall.
I'm not editing that out. No, you shouldn't.
But every week we planned ahead.
Oh, sure. You know, sure.
I think I mean in like the bigger sense of,
hey, I want to open a fitness studio. Let's do it.
I mean, we know for the most part, when it came to the fitness studio,
we knew what we were doing.
No, no, no, no. We knew how to teach.
As far as the business, we're still learning every single day.
But we knew we wanted to do it.
We did it. And same thing with the podcast.
It's sort of, Victoria was like, we're doing this thing.
And okay, we did it. And it's been a year.
And thank God you were like, okay, what are we talking about?
Yeah. What am I going to say?
Like I'm not a big knower when it comes.
If you want to, yeah, if you want to do it, I'm like, I trust you.
Yeah, don't do that.
It's easier in twos anyway.
Usually when we do things, it's not solo.
It's, hey, do you want to do this? Hey, we're going to do this.
So it is easier in twos.
If I had, if you had said I'm going to do a podcast by myself,
I would have said, oh, I can't wait to listen.
I'm not like, you know what I mean? Like it's not.
Damn it. I had that option.
Yeah, but then I wouldn't have cried on air.
I would never have made tears.
Oh, we're going to talk about that until 2027.
It's the biggest thing that's happened to her.
I just, I just, I've learned so much.
I mean, for real though, and I, and I feel like we have so much more
learning to do obviously because there's so much more learning to do,
but with the podcast, I think there's so much more we haven't even dove into
and we can.
I mean, we work not smarter and harder.
We work dumber and slower.
So we're going to work on that in 2024.
The, the part of us that goes hard real fast and we do it sometimes
isn't the most efficient way.
So I think in 2024, we're going to work on this podcast being more efficient
and learning more about that.
Al Borland a little less Tim the Twoma and Taylor.
If you know that reference, you can stay.
Yeah.
And if you know that reference, you know exactly what we're talking about.
But yeah, it's been an awesome year for everybody that listens regularly
or just like tunes in everyone's and I want thank you so much.
It's such a weird feeling to be like, we're going to do a podcast.
Why does anyone want to listen to us type of thing?
You know, I feel like what I like about this and the purpose of this podcast
is that people like us could feel heard and seen and be like, oh my God,
other people feel like that too.
And when people, yeah, when people come up and say, oh my gosh,
I totally resonated with you when you said that.
I think that is the sole purpose of why we did it.
And it's nice to hear that because sometimes, I mean, it's just me and you talking here.
So we're going to have more guests in 2024.
But yeah, but I think our fitness studio is the same way.
Our fitness studio is for the everyday.
It's not for the fitness, but it's not.
We're not trying to be fitness influencers, you know, and same thing with the podcast.
It's for us.
It's for you.
It's for normal people going through everyday things and situations.
And it's really nice to hear, oh my gosh, I felt, I felt you when you said that
because I feel the same way.
I was like, great.
That's what it's for.
Take note that no one says that about your singing.
It's never about that.
But I heard the moon episode was one of the best.
Oh my God.
I'm waiting.
Oh, there'll be more singing in 2024.
I'm just getting into it.
I feel like a year has gone.
You needed to think about that.
Yeah.
You needed to think that thought.
I'm going to get more into my vocals.
Oh my gosh.
I'm Victoria.
Hey guys, I'm Carly.
We're doing the ins and outs.
Tell us why.
Okay.
Because it's 2024.
We've gotten into it a little bit.
It's about a few weeks in.
I didn't want to do this.
I'm going to be honest with you.
It's true.
I did not want to do this.
I said to Victoria.
It's so basic.
Everyone's doing it.
It's so trendy.
And I honestly don't care about anybody else's ins and outs.
It's like when people tell me about their dreams, please.
I hate dreams.
When somebody talks to me about a dream that they had.
I'm like, I have no idea what you're talking about.
I wasn't there.
It doesn't apply to me.
I can't listen to other people's dreams.
I'm sorry.
That might be an unpopular opinion.
I don't want you telling me your personal dream where like you went into a grocery store
and floated to this.
It's like not relevant.
I would like to know who you're talking about.
Who's having these crazy ass dreams.
Lewis actually had that dream.
And I can't say no to him.
So I was like, oh honey, that's a great dream.
Look it up.
But that's what the ins and outs were for me.
I was like, well, what you're in and out is, is not my in and out.
Everyone's doing it.
It's super trendy.
It's not really relatable.
However, guess what I started doing?
Researching.
And in researching, I was like, wow, it's actually very helpful to hear what other people's ins and outs are.
I said to myself like, oh, I want to do that more.
Oh, I definitely don't want to do that more.
And it's the same thing.
I haven't seen anybody's ins and outs online.
This is something you had to tell me about.
Yeah.
So I got lots of ins for you and lots of outs for you.
I really just thought it was so basic and trendy.
And I was like, bleh.
But guess what?
I'm super basic.
And I love trendy.
So we're doing it.
Ins and outs of 2024.
So one of my ins is saying no more and creating more boundaries.
That's my in.
My mouth is wide open and I'll tell you why in a minute.
But go ahead.
And one of my outs is guilt.
Oh, is feeling guilty for having that in or that moment of saying no or being like, no, I don't want to do this.
Why don't you want to do it?
Because I don't want to do it.
Basically, the feeling of Jomo.
The joy of missing out or feeling guilty about wanting to do something that I want to do that nobody else wants to do.
Like, I don't want to feel guilty anymore.
I don't want to feel bad.
Say it again.
You want to say no more and create boundaries.
Well, which is like one in the same.
Like saying no to more things that I really don't want to do and not people pleasing, basically.
And creating the boundaries around what I actually do want to do and not feeling bad about it.
I think that's the hardest part is you can say no, but then the guilt that comes with it is the worst part.
Because we are very guilt-ridden people sometimes.
Well, people...
Purple pleasure?
People pleasers are mentally bred to think about everybody else first and then about yourself last.
But by the time you think about yourself, you're way too tired.
So then it's how many years and how many days go by that you're burnt out over life because you're just focusing on saying yes to everybody else but yourself.
So you want to hear something really funny?
You want to hear my in?
Is saying yes more.
So my mouth was wide open.
However, that doesn't mean saying yes to everybody.
I just went through a year of I feel like saying no to everything.
You really did.
Which is not like me at all.
And this year I want to say yes, but yes to more things that I want to do.
So basically saying the same thing.
You're saying no politely.
Yeah, I'm saying yes.
I'm not going to do that.
No, but we always are saying no to things that we want to do because we have to work because we're too tired because we have other obligations.
I don't want to do that anymore.
I want to say yes, I want to do that thing and I'll make it work because I want to do it.
So I want to go on that trip or I want to go to that movie or I want to watch that show, you know, like whatever it may be.
You want to do a lot of entertaining things.
I want to do.
Yes.
Yes, I do.
Because I feel like we haven't.
We've been saying no because of all of the things we have to do and I want to say no to the things we have to do and yes to the things that I really want to do.
It's basically living more.
Yes.
Oh, you're going to hate me.
I don't necessarily think and I can't speak for you, but I don't think like we're alive.
Yeah.
But we're not living.
Like there's so much that we could be doing to for ourselves to have fun that is frivolous.
That's just like for the sake of doing, but we are.
Yeah, but I have to get up tomorrow for work and I have to work and then it's a 12 hour day and then by the time I get home, I got to take care of ABC and day and I got to do this.
So like it's just too much and I'm too tired.
Right.
Like that's life.
And that's so what I don't want to do anymore.
Right.
I want to say yes to living it more and doing the things that I want to do.
We just saw a show this week that I absolutely loved.
It was called Ain't Too Proud.
We love Broadway.
We love shows.
We love watching shows.
I rarely get to do that because we always have something or we're always working.
Always work.
Yeah.
We're always working.
And so we went and I want to go again on a Tuesday night because we don't even have weekends.
I wanted to go see it again so I came home because Andrew didn't come.
I want Andrew to come see it.
And I said normally I would say, okay, I saw it once as enough but I really want you to
see this.
Are you going back?
We're going back.
So we are.
And I said, I don't ask for a lot.
I, well, no, I don't ask for a lot for stuff like that, for things that I want.
It's always for somebody else.
So I just said I don't ask for much and I really want to go.
It makes me really happy and I want to be happy.
Like I want to do something for me.
I want to go again.
And he was like, okay, that's all you have to say.
I want to do something for me and I want to make you go see this show because I think
you're really going to like this show.
I know.
But yes.
And yes, he said yes.
But having said that, my out, that was a long winded in, but my out is trying to please
everybody.
So we basically have the same in and out.
So my, it's a hard thing to do, especially when your job is to make sure everybody's
happy.
My therapist says, or has said before, you have to start being comfortable with just
disappointing people.
Yeah, that's so hard because that's where the pleasing comes into place and making sure
everybody is okay with you because you said yes and you're doing what they need you to
do and it's helping them at your sacrifice.
And even though, I mean, this is very aggressive ways to be saying little things like you want
to help people.
Oh my gosh, that's why we do what we do.
But there's a way and a balance to life that we're missing out on because we're more concerned
of the other versus the self.
And so one of the factors of all of that is making sure people not like us.
You know, I don't need people to like me, but I, the disappointment of me saying, no,
I can't do this for you today or I can't let you borrow this or blah, blah, blah, blah,
blah, blah, weighs heavier than just sacrificing my time to go do something.
And I think the way we've been is yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
So when you start saying, no, that's not going to work.
That's hard because I accept that.
Yeah.
Which I know we've talked about before, but so the people pleasing, I think, is a very
big out for me and trying to find the balance, pleasing myself and pleasing other people.
There's a balance there.
Yeah.
But it's hard.
It's hard to find.
Yeah, it is.
And it's hard to accept in the moment, easy to accept after the fact.
Well, you know, I'm not good with confrontation and I think everything's a confrontation.
Yes.
And Victoria will say, this doesn't have to be a situation.
I'm like, oh, but it is.
She's like, no, it's not.
So if you're like me and you have, I'm going to use it, the A word, some anxiety over
confrontation.
Ass.
If you have one of those, no.
Then you think confrontation is in every no and it's not.
Wow, good for you.
Yeah.
I'm learning.
However, it doesn't make it any easier.
It's not.
I'm not saying that it's easy for me to do, but there is not a confrontation in every
no.
Yeah, that's true.
That's a hard truth.
Put it on a T shirt.
Oh, so hard.
I don't think anybody compliments you on these moments either.
Actually, no one's like, you know what?
When you said it's so hard, I was like, feeling that.
No, I don't think anyone has said that yet.
But it's okay.
What's your next one?
Moving on.
I have the words weirdness slash you do you.
I love that, especially for you.
That's an in and I'm weird.
Yes, like a weird.
I like different things.
I like weird things.
I like not weird things.
I think a part of my existence has always been trying to come to terms with the fact
that I like the different genres you can be and like.
I like emo music and I like pop music and I like video games, but I like reading books
and I like camping and going out in nature.
But I like getting dressed up and going to a show.
I like all the different things.
No one has ever said to me that I cannot like all of the different things.
No, no one said that.
Except Carly.
Except actually, that's true.
And it's usually pertaining to what I wear and my outfit choices because I like to wear
the smiley faces and the butterflies, but I also want to put some diamonds on and she's
just like, no, it's a lot.
It's a lot.
But you do you boo boo.
I don't think you firmly mean that.
No, no, I do.
Just walk a little bit farther away from me.
But that's really what it is, is that I want more of an in for me as to coming to terms
with that like I'm OK with that I like different things, which technically goes under the umbrella
of being weird.
And I don't care if any.
I mean, I've never really cared if anybody else cares.
But there's a I think it's myself that I've always been like, well, you can't wear that
because you're not actually a goth girl.
Right.
But you are right, right.
But like I've censored myself.
No one has censored me.
I've stopped censoring yourself.
So what's in for me is just accepting that like I like different things and I'm allowed
to like different things.
Yeah.
And I'm allowed to express that I like different random things.
I when we lived in New York, I had a I know I've said this to I had a different wardrobe.
And so when I would come home, some people would say to me, oh, is that a New York outfit?
Yeah.
You're in Delco.
And I'm like, no, this is just what I like to wear.
But I stopped wearing the clothes, I guess I got more dressed up in New York because
every day was like a fashion show for me and I love clothes.
And that was a hard, hard thing to change because, you know, it is a little different,
but it doesn't have to be.
No, but if you accept that you truly don't care.
Right.
For yourself or what anybody else thinks, obviously, then you're not even going to notice.
So I that's that.
So on the out of that is apologizing for my weirdness.
Yes.
My in is accepting that I'm allowed to be, you know, I don't know why weird is the word,
but weird.
And my out is that I'm not going to be like, sorry for it anymore.
Well, I don't think that you're sorry for it.
I just don't think that you do it anymore.
But that's why I think and we don't go anywhere.
And I don't get the opportunity to go anywhere.
I, you know, what's really funny?
Victoria and I did not talk about this before the episode.
She didn't tell me her ins and outs.
I didn't tell her my ins and outs.
We just sort of what we normally do is we just sort of go and talk as we talk.
My in is being more silly.
Oh my God.
I know.
I feel the same way.
Like you sort of, and I think everybody does this as you get older.
It's like time to be serious or you sort of lose your silliness.
And Andrew will say to me all the time, what happened to your humor?
Because like to me, I'm like, the kids need to do this.
We need to do this.
I need to go to work.
We need to get them dressed.
Here's the day.
And he's like, what?
You used to be like silly.
And I'm not anymore.
I am very regimented.
Yes.
Because we need a routine.
And if there's no routine and if we're not doing what we're supposed to be doing, it's
like chaos.
Yeah.
But there's a balance.
Like you need that structure.
No, I know.
And I miss being silly.
Like and I find it when we are being silly.
And I'm like, oh my gosh, like I'm ridiculous.
But why don't I do that more often?
Yeah.
Like I love being ridiculous.
We're we're, I don't know if Victoria is loud.
I'm, I'm a loud, silly, ridiculous person.
She's just weird.
But together.
We're really fun.
But I'm louder.
You know, you are louder.
You are louder.
Carly and Andrew will show up to Easter.
One's a carrot and one's a bunny.
You haven't done that a long time.
We haven't done that in a long time.
And yeah, I want to bring back the silly because I think even for the kids, like they
don't know me as like this silly person that's wild and that's dad.
That's Andrew.
And now that's definitely him.
And I'm like, it's time for bed.
All right, guys, five more minutes.
And I want to bring, I want to bring in that silliness back again.
Yeah, that's good.
So watch out.
What you're out.
Hustle and grinding.
Not grinding like I can twerk all day.
Like grinding in a high school cafeteria.
That was the best.
Oh man, those are the good days.
Oh, yeah.
Like sort of opposite of being silly, the we need to get to the next level.
We need to do this.
I need to hustle more.
If we don't hustle, we're going to lose it.
It's not going anywhere.
We're not going anywhere.
If I don't let go a little bit and relax, maybe hustle and grind is the wrong.
Just relax a little more.
No, because I think you there's a piece up until this podcast.
There's so much good that came from this back in up until talking about it.
I think there was a piece of pride in the hustle.
Yeah.
And the grind because that's what got us where we are.
That's how our mom is.
That's to a degree.
That's how our dad is.
And it's it's who we are.
But there's so much to letting go of the like, it is who I am.
This is who I am.
Like you can change that.
And so the pride, I think we've hustled and grinded so much and so long and so hard that
we're kind of like turning to dust.
The grind is a little too much.
And so we're finding that that's actually not the way that we want to do it.
And so it's not that it's a bad thing.
It's just it needs to happen a little less.
Don't.
Don't you get it confused.
Don't you dare.
I'm a hustler, baby.
Sing.
I just want you to know.
Oh, oh, it's 2024.
I keep adding on.
Oh, in 10 years, it's going to be the whole song.
Yes.
I think I like working.
I like doing all that.
But I think a little less is more attainable in a life situation.
Long term.
Yeah.
The longevity of like being able to function day to day.
Keeping up with everybody, keeping up with keeping up with this world is everybody's
hustling and everybody could use a little chill pill and everyone is wound.
Bad burnout.
Yeah.
So I want to be more silly and a little less.
That's the baby.
Just want you to know.
You put your eyebrows away.
I can't.
It's so inappropriate.
All right.
Go ahead.
Okay.
My third one.
I'm going to go with we wrote down five each, but we're only really going to talk about
three.
And to be honest with you now that I'm reading them.
They're pretty much all the same.
They're kind of all the same.
I have an in is prioritizing me, which I've kind of already, it could be tied in with
saying no and creating boundaries, but prioritizing me to myself, not necessarily at the expense
of saying no or yes to anybody else.
Does that make sense?
No.
Say it another way.
I mean, in the sense of like in my own head and my own way of thinking, staying true to
me, right, staying true to like my authentic beliefs or thought process and not just like
conforming or just being like a little bit laxadaisical on, say, I'm in a conversation
and I'm like, yeah, I'm going to agree with you just for the sake of it.
Like, right.
And that to a degree that's really good because there's no need to do heated debates or non-heated
debates or talk to talk.
Like that's not who I am.
Yeah, we don't want to walk the walk either.
No.
So I think I'm talking through it right now.
Thank you for coming to my therapy session.
I think it's more of like in relationships, like prioritizing, not losing myself in either
platonic relationships, friendships, romantic family relationship, whatever it is, not losing
myself.
So prioritizing myself.
So we did that personality episode.
You were the giver.
And that is truly who you are.
You give so much and you don't get it back.
And that's draining and exhausting and not fair.
But you don't care.
I care about fair.
You, I don't, I think you care about it, but it never happens.
So you're just like, it is what it is.
And it's exhausting.
Yeah, that's kind of true.
But that's not going to happen this year because my, my out is second guessing.
Oh, wait, talk about that.
My out is second guessing myself.
We all have intuitive, like that gut feeling, right?
We talked about it.
Yeah, I see dead people.
If you, that's just a sixth sense.
I know.
Oh, right, right, right, right.
It's kind of, I mean, it is intuitive.
And we'll bring on some of those, but the, the gut feeling, the feeling in your stomach
is intuition, the feeling in your chest is fear.
We talked about that.
Yeah, yeah.
I remember.
So the second guessing is like when I know that I'm right.
And I am someone that does not have to be right.
I don't have to be right.
And nine times out of 10, I'm wrong.
Unless I'm talking to Carly.
And my, my gut feeling has steered me in the right way.
99% of the time.
And I've ignored it 95% of the time due to who knows what.
It's a lot of numbers.
Just let me process for one sec.
Your intuition can tell you exactly if you're on the right path, if you're talking to the
right person, if you are saying no to the right things or saying yes to the right things.
And this past year, I have come back to listening to it more.
I lost it the past couple of years.
I lost that gut feeling of being like, no, this is how I really feel about things or
this is what I really want to do.
Or my gut is telling me that this feels right.
Well, I think people change that.
Like people in your life made you feel like your gut wasn't right.
Right, right, right, right.
I'm on the outs of being under that umbrella, I think, or under that veil of censorship.
It's hard to see that when you're in it.
No matter, you know.
Yeah.
But once you steer away from that gut feeling, it's hard to find it again.
Yeah.
Because you, you know, the body keeps the score if you haven't read that book, read it.
But the body has memory.
And like if you've ignored it, that feeling in your stomach, quite literally in your stomach,
if you've ignored it enough times, your brain starts to tell you that that now feels like
something else.
Right.
It means something different.
I did for a long time, I got into that.
And so I don't want to do that anymore.
Stop second guessing yourself.
I like that.
Yeah.
I'm going to stop third guessing myself.
Like you're talking, like Carly talks about Carly.
Like, like, why are you asking that question, Carly?
Like talking to yourself in the third person.
No, like, I'm going to guess on the first and second, but I probably will trust the
third.
Oh my God.
You're like the person that's like, I would like to see a red cardinal.
Yes.
God and universe, please show it to me.
And then it comes and you're like, God, I need to see a cardinal or cardinal.
I need something a little more cardinaly.
Give me a signier sign, please.
It's me.
Hi.
That's a good one, though.
I think for a lot of people, because unless you are super confident in all things and
you have the best mental headspace and you just don't second guess yourself, you do what
you do when you want to do it.
And that's the final say.
Everybody has problems with second guessing themselves.
But if you can feel that feeling of this is not really what I want to be doing.
Or I mean, that you can feel it.
It's hard to listen to it.
Yeah.
All right.
My last one, my in is to look forward to 2025.
What is what?
I know.
It feels like a lot.
Well, why are you not?
Well, I want this year to be the year that I at 2025, I don't say, Oh, God, I'm so happy
this year ended.
I can't wait to go to the next one.
And 23 was like that.
Yeah.
I think every year, everyone just goes, Oh, I'm so happy to see it this year.
And I started a new one.
I don't want to do that this year.
I want to say at December 31st, 2024, this was a great year.
And I'm so happy and I can't wait to see what 2025 is.
because this is so good.
It's a daily chore.
That's work.
Because you have to wake up and be positive.
You have to wake up and find the joy
and the things that you don't wanna do.
And you have to do everything we've said for 52 weeks.
Every real tip we've said you have to do every day.
I just feel like I'm so sick and tired of going,
oh, God, can't wait till next year.
Just do it now.
But you know what, I feel like the past couple years
have just, well, they've been like that
because we've been in the middle of the hustle.
So maybe this will be the different.
I think that's why I said my first one was saying yes,
because we've had to say no for five years.
COVID and everything, and there was so many no's.
And then we were allowed to say no
because we had excuses.
If you didn't wanna do something, I was like,
yes, I don't have to do that anymore.
I can say no.
I miss driving by baby showers and wedding showers.
Not that I've been to any this past year,
but like bring those back.
Wait a second.
I'm not saying that my yes is to be like,
yes, I'm gonna go to that shower.
It's like, yes, I'm gonna go see that show again
because I really want to.
Yes, I wanna go to the movies on a Wednesday night.
Yeah, like those are my yeses.
I really wanna go to 2025 thinking this year was so great.
Yes, there's gonna be hard times,
yes, there's gonna be negatives,
there's gonna be things that I wanted to do,
but I couldn't do because of a million other things.
But I want it to be more happy
and more positive than negative this year.
I want it to outweigh.
I think what does that is that the decisions,
whether through the obstacles, the good or the bad,
are yours.
So then at the end of the year,
you feel like you had control of the year
and you made the year that you made.
Maybe that's a good thing.
I wanna take control over my year
and I don't want the year to take control of me.
Right, yeah.
We have always just had to go with the flow
of how hard things are and the burnout.
And it doesn't feel like we're making the decisions.
It just feels like you have to do what you have to do
to get through what you have to get through.
And so this year getting into 2025,
it would be nice to feel a little bit more like the driver.
Yeah, that sounds good.
I wanna do that.
It's true.
It's so true.
But I think saying yes more to the things I wanna do,
being sillier and just relaxing a little bit,
not being so uptight, all those things will just make
a Thursday morning more doable.
You know what I mean?
And that's all it takes.
It's not like I wanna go to Spain.
Like I'm going to Spain this year
and I'm gonna take vacations every weekend.
It's not.
It's just the silly little things every day
that you look back and go,
that was a really good year because it really outweighed
all the things I didn't wanna do.
And my out really does not, my last out,
I guess it does sort of go with it.
Is guess what it's called?
I researched it.
Oh, God.
It's called doom scrolling.
Oh, yeah.
Oh, you knew?
Deum doom scrolling.
Really?
Yes.
Where'd you learn?
Where'd I learn it?
Where'd you learn it?
I learned it on the internet.
Where'd you learn it?
It's the cyberspace.
I had just learned about it
because I learned that I do it.
And it wastes my time.
And do you know what I did last night?
Wait, explain doom scrolling for people
that maybe don't know.
Oh, it's literally scrolling
and then feeling bad about yourself.
That's basically what it is.
I mean, there are a million ways you can take that,
like wasting your time,
watching things that are negative.
A big ones at the end of the night
where you doom scroll and waste your
off of the clock rest of your nighttime
because you feel like you didn't have enough daytime
for yourself.
So you doom scroll and then you feel horrible about it
because you're now didn't get to sleep on time
and tomorrow's gonna be tiring
and or you feel bad that you just wasted
so much time doing it.
Yeah.
And last night, I was thinking about this
and I put my phone down, watched Bravo.
Bravo, Bravo, Bravo.
Sorry, I couldn't say it was the bad word.
If you're a Bravo person, you know what you say.
I hate everything that's happening.
It's the F word guys, it's the F word.
I hate it.
You know I don't curse.
But that's my guilty pleasure.
I love it.
And I put the phone down.
Usually I'm watching Bravo as I'm scrolling.
I mean, double negatives right there.
But I put the phone down and I did my nails.
And weird attention spin.
Well, there is no attention.
I'm half watching Bravo and I'm half scrolling.
So I don't have an attention span.
But instead I just watched Bravo.
Full, 100%, full out, no stop, no full stop.
No stop, full stop.
I don't know, but your nails look good.
And I did my nails instead of sitting on the phone
and really got into my Bravo show, Salt Lake City.
So good.
And my nails look horrible
because I'm not good at it, but I did it.
And I cut down my doom scrolling by at least 20 minutes.
And I didn't pick up the phone again
because I was like, why do I need to pick up the phone?
So by like an hour, aren't those episodes like an hour?
Well, yeah, but I watched three.
So three hours.
I had a lot of catching up to them.
Not 20 minutes, three hours.
Miami's so good.
Okay.
Anyway, I'm gonna, Bravo.
No, Bravo's always in.
But I am gonna stop scrolling at night.
It doesn't make me feel good.
It's a waste of my time.
And just like that, my brain is gone, overdrive,
trying to listen, trying to scroll.
It's not good for anybody.
It's not good for me.
Which is probably why it takes you longer to go to sleep
or don't sleep well and feel unrested when you wake up
because your brain is like just looking at blue light,
whether it's a big screen or the screen in your hand.
And then you're like, shut your eyes, go to sleep.
You're like, what?
I can't.
Your brain and your eyes are like,
what are you asking me to do?
This is a huge ass.
So I don't want to doom scroll.
Anymo.
Doom scroll, anymo.
Oh, so many outs I have for the podcast.
So I wrote some down.
For Fit to Be Real.
In Carly Readingmore and researching.
It's been really delightful that you have been reading
and learning and coming in, getting excited about things.
Carly out.
Extra tip titles.
Her real extra tip titles could take it down a notch.
Can't stop won't stop.
Carly in.
Learning more.
And then kind of applying it to her life.
Kind of applying.
Thinking about applying.
Hopefully applying.
Well, now some of them you've actually have.
Some of them I need to remind you in a moment.
But it's a process and it's awesome.
Carly out.
Carly out singing hustler baby.
I already did it and I will do it till the day I die.
Carly in.
It's number three and it's blank because I couldn't think of another in.
But I, the intention is there.
Carly out.
The intention is there.
You're such a brat.
Carly out is leaving her half full coffee in the sink when the dishwasher is right next to her.
She leaves, she makes me make her coffee every time that she's here.
And then she has to run out because she's got to go get the kids and she's got to go pick up Dean.
And she's got to go run to the trainer Joe's and she's always got to go to lunch duty.
And she has to go to lunch duty in the recess yard.
So she's always running out the door because we've talked for way too long like we are right now.
And I go into the sink and not only does she not pour out her half drunk and coffee.
She just puts the coffee cup in the sink and the dishwasher 90% of the time is open and ready to be filled.
So you could just put it in there and she just drops it and leaves.
Andrew's not here to do that for me.
And it's an out for me.
It's an out for me.
Well, I don't get to drink the coffee because we're talking and then it cold and then it cold.
It cold.
And I can't finish it.
And then yeah, I have to run.
So sue me.
Sue me.
What can you do me?
I love coffee.
That's from guys and dolls.
There's going to be more of that in 2024.
Guys and dolls?
Just singing in general.
I told you I'm warming up the voce.
It's an out.
We are going to have more guests in 2024.
So you don't just have to listen to us.
And we are going to learn more about ourselves.
We all are as a collective whole.
Yeah.
I think I would like to have more fit to be realers on.
Yes.
I'm going to put it out there now that we're going to do a call in question.
Oh my God.
Yes.
Type of situation.
So even if you are working on a Tuesday, I know you're sitting in a desk with a phone next to you.
You can call in and we will answer your questions.
Talk to you live.
Yeah.
I'm nervous.
I'm so young.
I'm not going to improv.
You're not invited.
You're going to make me make coffee.
I hope this was helpful for you.
I liked it.
It's not so basic and trendy.
It's actually good to sit down and think, man, what do I really want to do this year?
It's just reflection.
It's not a goal.
It's not an intention.
It's not a reflection.
But what's, oh my gosh, resolution.
It's just, what do you want more of out of the year and what do you want less of?
And knowing that you are the deciding factor in making that come to fruition.
I think everybody's in should be gaining control of your life again because I know for a fact
that the people that I talk to have lost control of their lives in many ways, not just like
with working out or eating or nutrition in always in schedules, in finding yourself
again in, and you know what is the craziest aspect of that in gaining control of your
life?
You have to let go of control.
Wait what?
No.
To gain control of your life and you feeling like you are the writer, the script writer
of the play of your life and not just the supporting character.
You are writing the script.
You have to let go of control.
You have to let go of the regiment and have more fun.
The routine and have to let go of getting upset when things don't go your way.
And when obstacles present themselves, you let go of the attachment to being so caught
up and it needs to go the way that I want it to go.
Even if it's I want to have more fun and I'm not having more fun.
Now I'm in control of being upset.
If you let go of control and trust that it's all going to work out, you have actually gained
control of your life again.
Do you think I've become better on the whole because I started doing yoga this year?
I think that you have become better as a whole because you're listening to me more.
I'm just kidding.
I do think yoga has plays a part.
There's something to you being forced to slow down that whether you know it or not, trickles
in off the mat into real life.
I was just thinking about that.
I think you breathe more.
I've never stuck to yoga so long in my life and I've dabbled here and there in New York
and I've never stuck to it this long.
And it's become your routine.
I want to go.
It's not something I feel like I have to do.
I really want to go.
I encourage everybody if you haven't tried yoga to go and if you haven't done it consistently
to try and keep it consistent because I'm being 100% serious.
I'm not messing around.
I honestly think yoga has something to do with me just relaxing a tad.
You're welcome.
Be more excited for me.
I'm very excited for you.
I knew that but I'm excited that you have realized that.
Boom.
Because what you have consistently stuck to is not the fitness yoga.
You have consistently stuck to EverFresh and Tyler which is yes, vigorous, albeit a little
bit athletic.
But there's pieces that sink into your subconscious that you're not even thinking about it and
it's the philosophy sometimes he brings in or it's the moments of silence and stillness
that you are not good at.
No, and I'm still trying to not think about my dances for the night class during Shavasana
and the light in you finding me in the universe.
Oh my God.
That is not what Namaste means but close and that's fine.
I was snoring in Shavasana today.
Stop it.
Oh yeah.
I could hear myself doing it and I was like, oh well.
That's yoga.
That's yoga baby.
I was like, I don't even care.
It feels so good.
Love it.
So you'll get to that point if you keep consistent which I think is a big factor.
Yeah, it really do.
I think everybody should try it.
Your real tip and your real extra tip for this 52nd episode is to do your own ins and
outs if you haven't already of things that you are proud of yourself and want to keep
and things that you realize don't service who you are and what you want 2024 to be about
because I didn't think it was a big deal but I think it's pretty cool because now I have
this list that I can reference and be like, this is not where I wanted it to go.
Yeah.
I think it's great.
And it doesn't have to be that deep.
It doesn't have to be that hard.
Honestly, one of my ends is just to be sillier in Victoria's is to just embrace her weirdness.
I mean, she's going to embrace it.
Horde.
The Horde.
It's so fun to say it like that.
We hope that you remember that you always fit to be real.
Are you constipated?
I don't.
I'm not sure what's so hard.
You're so weird.
I can't.
I can't with you right now.
You're so weird.
I refuse to apologize for that.
Well, I'll say yes to that.
Oh my God.
Goodbye.
I'm looking forward to the next episode.
We hope that you also remember that you are fit to be real and always allow to be a little
extra, extra silly, extra everything.
For legal reasons, we have to tell you that this podcast is meant for entertainment and
educational purposes only.
We are not healthcare professionals.
For all of your health, wellness, fitness and self care needs, please refer to the medical
professional in your life.
Your primary care physician, your therapist, a certified coach, whoever it may be.
And then let us know what they say because I guarantee we need to know what to do.
Okay?
Bye.