1 00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,160 Welcome to Fit to Be Real and a little extra. 2 00:00:05,400 --> 00:00:07,040 Hello everyone. 3 00:00:07,040 --> 00:00:07,880 It's me. 4 00:00:09,120 --> 00:00:10,840 It's Carly. 5 00:00:10,840 --> 00:00:11,680 Guess what? 6 00:00:11,680 --> 00:00:16,440 We are talking about pressure and stress today. 7 00:00:16,440 --> 00:00:18,640 Do you feel pressured and stressed? 8 00:00:18,640 --> 00:00:21,960 I think I'm getting a better handle on it 9 00:00:21,960 --> 00:00:25,200 thanks to this podcast called Fit to Be Real. 10 00:00:25,200 --> 00:00:28,000 I'm learning how to handle things a little differently. 11 00:00:28,000 --> 00:00:31,120 There's a little difference between holiday pressure 12 00:00:31,120 --> 00:00:34,800 and holiday stress as opposed to mundane, 13 00:00:34,800 --> 00:00:39,320 regular old pressure and stress that we're used to. 14 00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:40,720 So we're gonna talk about that today. 15 00:00:40,720 --> 00:00:41,560 Okay. 16 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:42,400 Okay. 17 00:00:48,400 --> 00:00:49,240 I'm Victoria. 18 00:00:49,240 --> 00:00:51,200 Hey guys, I'm Carly. 19 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:53,520 I think part of my pressure and stress comes out 20 00:00:53,520 --> 00:00:55,720 in my intro. 21 00:00:55,720 --> 00:00:56,560 What do you think? 22 00:00:56,560 --> 00:01:00,760 Well, it's been consistent for 47 weeks. 23 00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:01,600 All right. 24 00:01:01,600 --> 00:01:02,960 So I'm gonna give you a little backstory 25 00:01:02,960 --> 00:01:04,040 about what just happened 26 00:01:04,040 --> 00:01:07,360 and why Victoria might be a little stressed out. 27 00:01:07,360 --> 00:01:09,040 Okay. 28 00:01:09,040 --> 00:01:12,640 So the other day I told her what we were gonna talk about 29 00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,480 and I said, I got it. 30 00:01:14,480 --> 00:01:15,560 I'm gonna research it. 31 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:16,400 I got it. 32 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:17,880 I wanted to do this episode. 33 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:22,000 I didn't realize that the next text message I sent her 34 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:23,720 about 10 minutes later said, 35 00:01:23,720 --> 00:01:27,040 I just Instagram real bombed you. 36 00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:27,880 The other thing. 37 00:01:27,880 --> 00:01:30,560 I'm gonna text you tomorrow. 38 00:01:30,560 --> 00:01:34,400 And so she said her alarm for like 45 minutes earlier. 39 00:01:34,400 --> 00:01:35,960 4.45 AM. 40 00:01:35,960 --> 00:01:36,800 To watch them all 41 00:01:36,800 --> 00:01:38,280 cause she thought I was gonna test her 42 00:01:38,280 --> 00:01:43,280 and those two text messages did not go together. 43 00:01:43,360 --> 00:01:45,640 I just found some really funny Instagram reels 44 00:01:45,640 --> 00:01:47,440 that I wanted her to watch. 45 00:01:47,440 --> 00:01:50,760 And I thought I had to know my stuff. 46 00:01:50,760 --> 00:01:55,680 So I got up way earlier in the dark 47 00:01:55,680 --> 00:02:00,680 so I could get ready for class and watch 20 plus reels. 48 00:02:00,800 --> 00:02:01,840 They were so good. 49 00:02:01,840 --> 00:02:04,840 That I kept going, what does this have to do with anything? 50 00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:06,640 These, none of these are connected. 51 00:02:06,640 --> 00:02:08,920 None of these make sense to each other. 52 00:02:08,920 --> 00:02:10,840 They're funny individually. 53 00:02:10,840 --> 00:02:12,640 Why do I have to know these? 54 00:02:12,640 --> 00:02:13,480 Okay. 55 00:02:13,480 --> 00:02:14,720 Maybe I'll watch them twice 56 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:16,920 because she's gonna test me later. 57 00:02:16,920 --> 00:02:19,280 And after those text messages, 58 00:02:19,280 --> 00:02:21,960 there was a text that said, I have it all tomorrow, 59 00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:22,800 end of game. 60 00:02:22,800 --> 00:02:26,080 So I was preparing at 4.45. 61 00:02:26,080 --> 00:02:29,280 Listen, I walked in and she said, 62 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:31,560 what did those reels have to do with today's episode? 63 00:02:31,560 --> 00:02:33,640 I said, I have no idea what you're talking about. 64 00:02:33,640 --> 00:02:35,760 I just really liked those reels. 65 00:02:35,760 --> 00:02:37,120 I threw a Christmas pillar at her. 66 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:38,240 Oh my God, multiple times. 67 00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:40,560 She was so angry with me. 68 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:43,520 Some might say she's stressed. 69 00:02:43,520 --> 00:02:44,640 No, I'm anger. 70 00:02:44,640 --> 00:02:45,480 Okay. 71 00:02:45,480 --> 00:02:49,360 If this is inside out, I am anger. 72 00:02:49,360 --> 00:02:51,240 Speaking of, I'm actually very excited 73 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,320 to see the new inside out with anxiety. 74 00:02:53,320 --> 00:02:54,160 Yeah. 75 00:02:54,160 --> 00:02:55,560 Is it just inside out too, 76 00:02:55,560 --> 00:02:57,160 or is it called something else? 77 00:02:57,160 --> 00:02:58,640 I think it has a different title. 78 00:02:58,640 --> 00:02:59,640 Thank you for asking. 79 00:02:59,640 --> 00:03:00,480 I don't know. 80 00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:01,640 Oh, well, maybe you should have, 81 00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:03,080 that was the next reel I sent you. 82 00:03:03,080 --> 00:03:04,080 Hold please. 83 00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:09,640 It's called inside out too. 84 00:03:09,640 --> 00:03:13,480 Nice. 85 00:03:13,480 --> 00:03:15,680 And it adds anxiety to the mix. 86 00:03:15,680 --> 00:03:16,800 Just anxiety? 87 00:03:16,800 --> 00:03:17,800 Cause I feel like there are other ones. 88 00:03:17,800 --> 00:03:18,920 No, I think there was another. 89 00:03:18,920 --> 00:03:19,760 Yeah. 90 00:03:19,760 --> 00:03:20,880 I think there was a, I don't know. 91 00:03:20,880 --> 00:03:24,000 I'm not sure, but anxiety looks like my spirit animal. 92 00:03:24,000 --> 00:03:28,400 Where, oh my God, it's Victoria as a muppet. 93 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:31,520 And Carly when she tries to do her hair during class. 94 00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:33,320 So everybody look it up. 95 00:03:33,320 --> 00:03:34,680 You will know. 96 00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:35,760 When does it come out? 97 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:36,600 Not that we're sponsored, 98 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:39,120 but we should be by inside out too. 99 00:03:39,120 --> 00:03:42,360 In 2020 release date, June 14th. 100 00:03:42,360 --> 00:03:43,200 Oh my God. 101 00:03:43,200 --> 00:03:44,040 We have a lot of anxiety now. 102 00:03:44,040 --> 00:03:44,880 We have a while. 103 00:03:44,880 --> 00:03:46,920 I'm going to have anxiety waiting for this movie. 104 00:03:46,920 --> 00:03:50,240 I hope you wake up every morning waiting for it. 105 00:03:50,240 --> 00:03:52,600 I hope that alarm goes off at 445. 106 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:55,960 Well, now that she's over that, 107 00:03:57,840 --> 00:04:00,920 we're going to talk about pressure and stress 108 00:04:00,920 --> 00:04:03,960 and sort of differentiating between the two 109 00:04:03,960 --> 00:04:06,040 because sometimes people think they're the same thing. 110 00:04:06,040 --> 00:04:06,880 Yeah. 111 00:04:06,880 --> 00:04:08,720 I feel like they're very similar. 112 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:10,200 I'm interested. 113 00:04:10,200 --> 00:04:11,040 Okay. Thanks. 114 00:04:11,040 --> 00:04:11,880 You're interested? 115 00:04:11,880 --> 00:04:13,400 I'm interested in today. 116 00:04:13,400 --> 00:04:15,040 Okay, good. 117 00:04:15,040 --> 00:04:16,080 Pressure here. 118 00:04:16,080 --> 00:04:18,440 Okay. Let's define them first and then we'll get into it. 119 00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:19,440 All right. Pressure. 120 00:04:21,160 --> 00:04:24,320 Pressure is the tension we feel during important moments 121 00:04:24,320 --> 00:04:26,680 or that we think are important moments, 122 00:04:26,680 --> 00:04:28,120 sort of like in your head, 123 00:04:28,120 --> 00:04:30,320 possibly feeling judged and uncertain. 124 00:04:30,320 --> 00:04:32,360 And it's when we feel we need to perform 125 00:04:32,360 --> 00:04:33,880 because something's at stake. 126 00:04:33,880 --> 00:04:36,320 So that's basically work pressure. 127 00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:38,880 When you've got something do, when you're at school, 128 00:04:38,880 --> 00:04:42,440 you've got like, something's at stake. 129 00:04:42,440 --> 00:04:44,840 So you've got to work towards that end goal, 130 00:04:44,840 --> 00:04:46,000 but then it's over. 131 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:49,200 Then the pressure lifts and then it's released 132 00:04:49,200 --> 00:04:51,320 and then you're on to something else. 133 00:04:51,320 --> 00:04:53,480 Like when you set an alarm the night before, 134 00:04:53,480 --> 00:04:55,520 kind of dreading having to get up that early, 135 00:04:55,520 --> 00:04:58,280 but then when you see all the videos that you need to do 136 00:04:58,280 --> 00:05:02,520 and watch by like 530, you feel like the relief. 137 00:05:02,520 --> 00:05:03,360 Yeah. Yeah. 138 00:05:03,360 --> 00:05:04,200 Did you feel the relief? 139 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:06,640 Yeah, I did until you walked back in the door. 140 00:05:06,640 --> 00:05:08,720 And then now this is when the stress comes in. 141 00:05:08,720 --> 00:05:09,560 So what's stress? 142 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:13,040 This is the second part of your morning routine. 143 00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:19,800 We experience stress when no one else is paying attention 144 00:05:19,800 --> 00:05:21,520 and we are overwhelmed. 145 00:05:21,520 --> 00:05:23,880 So there's nothing really at stake. 146 00:05:23,880 --> 00:05:25,840 No one else is paying attention. 147 00:05:25,840 --> 00:05:26,680 It's internal. 148 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:29,440 When no one's paying attention to you 149 00:05:29,440 --> 00:05:33,640 and your external whatever's at stake, your pressure, 150 00:05:33,640 --> 00:05:35,240 the stress is what you feel. 151 00:05:36,400 --> 00:05:37,720 It's like internal judgment. 152 00:05:37,720 --> 00:05:38,560 Yes. 153 00:05:38,560 --> 00:05:39,880 The pressure is other people judging 154 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:41,120 and you being nervous about that. 155 00:05:41,120 --> 00:05:44,760 And then stress is you're judging yourself for X, Y, and Z. 156 00:05:45,680 --> 00:05:46,720 And overthinking. 157 00:05:46,720 --> 00:05:48,040 Overthinking, yeah. 158 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:50,800 So the pressure is an expectation or demand 159 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:54,720 to perform a task and it can lead to stress and anxiety 160 00:05:54,720 --> 00:05:56,080 if it's not lifted. 161 00:05:56,080 --> 00:06:00,040 Like if that end goal, if that end task is not lifted, 162 00:06:00,040 --> 00:06:01,760 then it becomes stress. 163 00:06:01,760 --> 00:06:04,320 The pressure becomes stress and stress is the psychological 164 00:06:04,320 --> 00:06:09,320 response from ourselves or external beings, people, 165 00:06:09,400 --> 00:06:12,880 situations that can manifest into physical symptoms, 166 00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:14,480 which I know we've talked about before. 167 00:06:14,480 --> 00:06:19,480 Stress gives you headache, stress makes your insides hurt. 168 00:06:19,720 --> 00:06:21,760 There's just so many, it makes you break out. 169 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:26,560 There's so many external and internal stress symptoms. 170 00:06:26,560 --> 00:06:29,440 So it's a fine line, I think, between pressure and stress. 171 00:06:29,440 --> 00:06:30,720 So guess what? 172 00:06:30,720 --> 00:06:35,720 We're gonna page nurse manager Justin, brain surgeon. 173 00:06:35,960 --> 00:06:36,880 Oh my gosh. 174 00:06:36,880 --> 00:06:40,200 And whatever he actually does, we're not quite sure. 175 00:06:41,120 --> 00:06:43,880 And we're gonna get to the science behind it. 176 00:06:43,880 --> 00:06:45,240 Ba-ba-ba-ba. 177 00:06:45,240 --> 00:06:46,440 Crawl, yeah. 178 00:06:46,440 --> 00:06:48,120 Me, I'm going to. 179 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:50,240 Do you feel pressure? 180 00:06:50,240 --> 00:06:52,080 No, I feel so stressed. 181 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:55,040 The science behind it. 182 00:06:55,040 --> 00:06:58,240 So cortisol, it's in your brain. 183 00:06:58,240 --> 00:07:01,040 It's a stress chemical that our body releases 184 00:07:01,040 --> 00:07:03,320 when we are worried or feeling judged. 185 00:07:03,320 --> 00:07:05,480 So it gets released, okay? 186 00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:08,440 We need cortisol to create aha moments. 187 00:07:09,360 --> 00:07:11,520 This is literally the science behind it 188 00:07:11,520 --> 00:07:13,440 for people like me to understand. 189 00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:15,760 We need cortisol to create aha moments, 190 00:07:15,760 --> 00:07:18,520 but if we have too much of it for too long, 191 00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:20,240 our brain gets overloaded. 192 00:07:21,120 --> 00:07:24,320 Too much cortisol releasing, you get overloaded. 193 00:07:24,320 --> 00:07:26,400 What happens when that happens? 194 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:30,000 Cortisol overload makes us actually less productive, 195 00:07:30,000 --> 00:07:32,240 causing us to crash. 196 00:07:32,240 --> 00:07:34,720 You know when, just like Christmas morning, 197 00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,600 everyone's all hype, type, type, type, type, 198 00:07:36,600 --> 00:07:39,480 Christmas morning, all the presents are opened, 199 00:07:39,480 --> 00:07:41,000 there's wrapping paper everywhere. 200 00:07:41,000 --> 00:07:41,880 What happens? 201 00:07:41,880 --> 00:07:44,520 Everyone falls asleep on the couch 202 00:07:44,520 --> 00:07:47,280 because you have officially crashed. 203 00:07:47,280 --> 00:07:50,080 Your cortisol has been released, overload, 204 00:07:50,080 --> 00:07:51,600 you can't take it anymore in your body, 205 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:52,680 literally shuts down. 206 00:07:52,680 --> 00:07:57,680 And the holiday season is a condensed amount of time 207 00:07:58,440 --> 00:08:00,080 when our cortisol is on overload. 208 00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,720 It is a very short amount of time. 209 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:04,920 That's why people get so stressed out during the holidays 210 00:08:04,920 --> 00:08:08,600 because your cortisol levels are on overload 211 00:08:08,600 --> 00:08:10,760 and you end up crashing. 212 00:08:10,760 --> 00:08:14,360 And some people crack under that pressure. 213 00:08:14,360 --> 00:08:18,920 I know cortisol in terms of stress and the high levels. 214 00:08:18,920 --> 00:08:20,360 And I know that there's many ways 215 00:08:20,360 --> 00:08:23,800 to decrease your cortisol levels. 216 00:08:23,800 --> 00:08:27,920 Caffeine is a big instigator of high cortisol. 217 00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:30,000 That was just for you. 218 00:08:32,200 --> 00:08:33,800 I'm running on it right now. 219 00:08:33,800 --> 00:08:35,360 How do you get to a aha moment? 220 00:08:35,360 --> 00:08:38,240 Like what is the connection between cortisol and aha moment? 221 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:39,080 Like a realization? 222 00:08:39,080 --> 00:08:40,160 Is that what an aha moment is? 223 00:08:40,160 --> 00:08:41,360 Yeah, like a realization. 224 00:08:41,360 --> 00:08:46,360 Like the finishing of that said pressure, task, work demand. 225 00:08:46,360 --> 00:08:50,640 And like the cortisol that our body releases 226 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:54,240 is the driving force to get things like that done. 227 00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:57,360 And then if it goes too much, it's bad. 228 00:08:57,360 --> 00:09:00,520 Yes, and the aha moment is good. 229 00:09:00,520 --> 00:09:03,200 Some of that pressure, some of that cortisol, 230 00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:05,280 that aha realization, that's good. 231 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:06,840 Some pressure is good for us. 232 00:09:06,840 --> 00:09:09,920 It helps us focus and avoid procrastination. 233 00:09:09,920 --> 00:09:14,920 So you need that healthy level of release to get to the aha. 234 00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:19,320 Once it goes past the aha, then it's overboard. 235 00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:22,080 So, okay, yeah, some pressure is good. 236 00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:23,120 That's fine. 237 00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:26,040 However, if we leave things to the last minute 238 00:09:26,040 --> 00:09:30,640 and procrastinate, it does not let us make the best decisions. 239 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:31,640 Which we all know. 240 00:09:32,440 --> 00:09:33,920 If you wait till the last minute, 241 00:09:33,920 --> 00:09:35,040 you might be getting it done. 242 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:36,440 You might be finishing in the task, 243 00:09:36,440 --> 00:09:39,120 but you're not making the best decision 244 00:09:39,120 --> 00:09:42,360 and you pick the first idea instead of the best idea. 245 00:09:42,360 --> 00:09:43,200 Right. 246 00:09:43,200 --> 00:09:45,160 Which is not always the best idea. 247 00:09:45,160 --> 00:09:46,000 Right, right, right. 248 00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:47,200 Because you're, you know. 249 00:09:47,200 --> 00:09:48,400 But it's the one that's going to get it done 250 00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:49,400 by the time you need to get it done. 251 00:09:49,400 --> 00:09:50,000 Right, yeah. 252 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:51,040 Exactly. 253 00:09:51,040 --> 00:09:55,200 So that is the difference between stress and pressure. 254 00:09:57,680 --> 00:10:01,520 Now, why do the holidays make it worse for everybody? 255 00:10:01,520 --> 00:10:03,480 Because you get up earlier to watch things 256 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:06,560 that you don't need to watch when you could be sleeping in 257 00:10:06,560 --> 00:10:09,000 and getting a little bit more beauty sleep. 258 00:10:09,000 --> 00:10:12,320 I was just going to be like, this is a test. 259 00:10:12,320 --> 00:10:14,000 Why? 260 00:10:14,000 --> 00:10:15,960 What reel did I send you? 261 00:10:15,960 --> 00:10:17,760 Is this making sense? 262 00:10:17,760 --> 00:10:18,520 I don't know. 263 00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:20,840 I've now blacked out to the whole thing. 264 00:10:20,840 --> 00:10:23,920 I mean, it was like cat singing and like kids dancing, 265 00:10:23,920 --> 00:10:24,840 playing guitar. 266 00:10:24,840 --> 00:10:27,920 It's like bullfowl screaming, random. 267 00:10:27,920 --> 00:10:30,760 It has nothing to do with today, but whatever. 268 00:10:30,760 --> 00:10:33,560 Why are we feeling so stressed 269 00:10:33,560 --> 00:10:35,800 and full of pressure more during the holidays? 270 00:10:35,800 --> 00:10:39,440 I think it's to try to keep the magic for some reason. 271 00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:41,680 There's something to do with, 272 00:10:41,680 --> 00:10:44,200 I don't know, they're fake obligations. 273 00:10:44,200 --> 00:10:45,680 And I don't know if fake's the right word, 274 00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:49,040 but obligations that we put on ourselves that are mandatory, 275 00:10:49,040 --> 00:10:49,680 but they're not. 276 00:10:49,680 --> 00:10:51,080 You do not have to make every party. 277 00:10:51,080 --> 00:10:54,040 You do not have to make all of the cookies 278 00:10:54,040 --> 00:10:55,160 because you did it last year. 279 00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:57,400 Maybe this year you just don't have the time and that's OK. 280 00:10:57,400 --> 00:10:59,680 But you're going to try to still get it done 281 00:10:59,680 --> 00:11:02,480 because that's what you're quote unquote supposed to do. 282 00:11:02,480 --> 00:11:02,760 Right. 283 00:11:02,760 --> 00:11:04,080 And that adds on to stress. 284 00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,320 And then the magic of, especially if you have kids, 285 00:11:06,320 --> 00:11:07,760 keeping the magic of Christmas. 286 00:11:07,760 --> 00:11:08,960 That's every day for me. 287 00:11:08,960 --> 00:11:09,480 Alive. 288 00:11:09,480 --> 00:11:10,040 Exactly. 289 00:11:10,040 --> 00:11:12,080 That's a lot. That's a lot. 290 00:11:12,080 --> 00:11:14,880 So that is stress. 291 00:11:14,880 --> 00:11:15,440 Right. 292 00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:17,920 So the pressure of all of that, 293 00:11:17,920 --> 00:11:19,400 like the pressure of like, oh, my gosh, 294 00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:22,080 we only have four weeks to shop and wrap. 295 00:11:22,080 --> 00:11:23,160 That's OK. 296 00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:24,400 I mean, yeah, that happens. 297 00:11:24,400 --> 00:11:25,680 People are busy. 298 00:11:25,680 --> 00:11:27,200 You know, that pressure is OK. 299 00:11:27,200 --> 00:11:31,520 The pressure when it comes to the point of being like, 300 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,720 we need to make this the best holiday 301 00:11:33,720 --> 00:11:35,320 that we've ever had in our whole lives. 302 00:11:35,320 --> 00:11:37,760 And then it becomes stressful to try and figure out 303 00:11:37,760 --> 00:11:38,560 how to do that. 304 00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:42,600 That's when I think people like jump ship and it's too much. 305 00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:47,600 Where the pressure having to buy the same type of caliber 306 00:11:47,600 --> 00:11:49,560 of presence as you did the year before, 307 00:11:49,560 --> 00:11:52,520 but you just don't have the financial support for that 308 00:11:52,520 --> 00:11:53,480 this year. That's pressure. 309 00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:54,640 You're jumping. 310 00:11:54,640 --> 00:11:56,720 Oh, don't stress me out. 311 00:11:56,720 --> 00:11:57,880 We're not there yet. 312 00:11:57,880 --> 00:12:00,200 I don't ask me questions then. 313 00:12:02,800 --> 00:12:03,200 OK. 314 00:12:03,200 --> 00:12:04,560 I feel pressured. 315 00:12:04,560 --> 00:12:05,840 I feel you. 316 00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:06,920 Or maybe I'm stressed. 317 00:12:06,920 --> 00:12:08,320 I don't know. 318 00:12:08,320 --> 00:12:09,560 Well, let's figure it out. 319 00:12:09,560 --> 00:12:12,440 Why are you feeling more of this during the holidays? 320 00:12:12,440 --> 00:12:13,240 I'll tell you. 321 00:12:15,240 --> 00:12:15,840 Why? 322 00:12:15,840 --> 00:12:18,200 Because we need to keep track of more responsibilities. 323 00:12:18,200 --> 00:12:23,120 Not only are you at work, not only do you have, you know, 324 00:12:23,120 --> 00:12:26,320 Christmas tableaus and the nativity scenes to go to. 325 00:12:26,320 --> 00:12:28,120 And then this kid's concert. 326 00:12:28,120 --> 00:12:30,800 And there's just like so many more responsibilities 327 00:12:30,800 --> 00:12:32,640 in this very short amount of time. 328 00:12:32,640 --> 00:12:34,960 So you're like packing it all in and getting teacher gifts. 329 00:12:34,960 --> 00:12:36,200 Yes. Oh my god. Yes. 330 00:12:36,200 --> 00:12:37,120 You're adding that on. 331 00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:38,880 It's in your brain is an overload. 332 00:12:38,880 --> 00:12:43,440 It actually causes your memory to decrease when your brain is 333 00:12:43,440 --> 00:12:44,360 an overload like that. 334 00:12:44,360 --> 00:12:47,160 I mean, Victoria will tell you firsthand. 335 00:12:47,160 --> 00:12:48,920 I'm going to let you in. 336 00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:51,480 She will agree with this for me. 337 00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:52,160 Pervert. 338 00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:53,680 That my oh, I do every day. 339 00:12:53,680 --> 00:12:55,040 You know I do every day. 340 00:12:55,040 --> 00:12:59,360 Your memory actually decreases when your brain is an overload 341 00:12:59,360 --> 00:13:00,760 due to pressure. 342 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,120 Give us an example. 343 00:13:02,120 --> 00:13:03,440 I can't remember. 344 00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:04,960 Exactly. 345 00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:05,640 Thank you. 346 00:13:05,640 --> 00:13:07,560 There's so many. 347 00:13:07,560 --> 00:13:10,720 She will tell me conversations that we didn't have. 348 00:13:10,720 --> 00:13:12,520 We did not have said conversation. 349 00:13:12,520 --> 00:13:13,240 I had them. 350 00:13:13,240 --> 00:13:13,960 It's in my head. 351 00:13:13,960 --> 00:13:14,920 It did not go that way. 352 00:13:14,920 --> 00:13:19,240 Well, I also may be meant to have the conversation. 353 00:13:19,240 --> 00:13:22,040 And just as I was falling asleep in my little pillow, 354 00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:23,200 was like, I'll do it tomorrow. 355 00:13:23,200 --> 00:13:25,280 But like in my head, I like did it. 356 00:13:25,280 --> 00:13:26,920 I think it's called hallucinat. 357 00:13:26,920 --> 00:13:27,360 I'm sorry. 358 00:13:27,360 --> 00:13:27,600 What? 359 00:13:27,600 --> 00:13:29,600 A hallucination. 360 00:13:29,600 --> 00:13:30,720 Which you're doing right now. 361 00:13:30,720 --> 00:13:32,360 A hallucination. 362 00:13:32,360 --> 00:13:35,640 Victoria is on some hallucinogenics right now. 363 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:37,000 Oh, I wish. 364 00:13:37,000 --> 00:13:38,080 No, I'm not. 365 00:13:38,080 --> 00:13:39,000 That would de-stress me. 366 00:13:39,000 --> 00:13:40,200 What a good stocking stuffer. 367 00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:40,700 OK. 368 00:13:44,680 --> 00:13:48,440 Mom, are you listening? 369 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:50,040 Anyway. 370 00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:53,280 So yeah, you kind of disassociate from reality 371 00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:55,680 when your cortisol levels are that high. 372 00:13:55,680 --> 00:13:56,960 Yeah, and if you black out. 373 00:13:56,960 --> 00:14:00,160 Yeah, if you write stuff down, go you. 374 00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:00,880 That's awesome. 375 00:14:00,880 --> 00:14:03,480 If you don't like me, you're definitely not 376 00:14:03,480 --> 00:14:04,560 going to remember everything. 377 00:14:04,560 --> 00:14:05,400 There's just too much. 378 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:05,920 I know. 379 00:14:05,920 --> 00:14:06,800 You're saying that you could. 380 00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:07,600 You have thumbs. 381 00:14:07,600 --> 00:14:09,160 You have hands. 382 00:14:09,160 --> 00:14:11,400 New Year's resolution 2024. 383 00:14:11,400 --> 00:14:14,520 You have a phone in your hand at all times. 384 00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:16,240 You don't even type anymore. 385 00:14:16,240 --> 00:14:17,640 You dictate your text. 386 00:14:17,640 --> 00:14:18,400 I know. 387 00:14:18,400 --> 00:14:21,120 And Dean always comes out as Tina. 388 00:14:21,120 --> 00:14:24,920 So I am constantly texting Victoria and my mom going, 389 00:14:24,920 --> 00:14:26,840 got to pick up Tina from school. 390 00:14:26,840 --> 00:14:29,280 Can you drop Tina off? 391 00:14:29,280 --> 00:14:32,560 If only it was that simple and that was the only typo 392 00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:33,840 that she was dictating. 393 00:14:33,840 --> 00:14:40,680 It really is like a Morris code type situation in paragraphs, 394 00:14:40,680 --> 00:14:43,920 individual paragraphs, because it's every fluid thought 395 00:14:43,920 --> 00:14:45,880 that she's thinking, but not all at once. 396 00:14:45,880 --> 00:14:48,520 It's always when I'm driving because I don't have my fingers. 397 00:14:48,520 --> 00:14:50,120 I'm always dictating. 398 00:14:50,120 --> 00:14:52,720 And there's always like a kid in the background 399 00:14:52,720 --> 00:14:54,440 that messes up the one line. 400 00:14:54,440 --> 00:14:55,760 Oh, do not blame them. 401 00:14:55,760 --> 00:14:57,560 Don't you dare blame them. 402 00:14:57,560 --> 00:14:58,760 How dare you? 403 00:14:58,760 --> 00:15:02,640 Also, my memory is decreasing because my brain is on overload. 404 00:15:02,640 --> 00:15:03,320 Fact. 405 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:07,880 So thankfully, all of that, the holidays are a short time. 406 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:10,960 That's why everybody always says, oh, thank god, 407 00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,040 the holidays are over. 408 00:15:12,040 --> 00:15:15,360 What's your excuse in July? 409 00:15:15,360 --> 00:15:18,840 I have a child born in two in July, one in August, 410 00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:20,000 and Andrew's birthday is in August. 411 00:15:20,000 --> 00:15:22,040 I have a very stressful summer. 412 00:15:22,040 --> 00:15:22,560 It is. 413 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:25,080 What's your excuse in September? 414 00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:28,400 I am just coming off for birthdays in the summer. 415 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:31,480 And I am decompressing, getting ready for the holidays. 416 00:15:31,480 --> 00:15:34,440 I call bullshit. 417 00:15:34,440 --> 00:15:35,080 All right. 418 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:38,120 Why are we feeling it more during the holidays? 419 00:15:38,120 --> 00:15:39,040 I'll tell you why. 420 00:15:39,040 --> 00:15:39,600 OK. 421 00:15:39,600 --> 00:15:41,640 I'm going to list off some reasons you're 422 00:15:41,640 --> 00:15:44,800 feeling more pressure and more stressed during the holiday 423 00:15:44,800 --> 00:15:46,560 season as opposed to other times. 424 00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,120 Your sister doesn't write things down. 425 00:15:48,120 --> 00:15:50,760 That's number one. 426 00:15:50,760 --> 00:15:52,560 Number two, you work with your sister. 427 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:58,520 Number one, family get-togethers. 428 00:15:58,520 --> 00:15:59,040 OK. 429 00:15:59,040 --> 00:15:59,520 OK. 430 00:15:59,520 --> 00:16:01,680 That can make you feel stressed. 431 00:16:01,680 --> 00:16:06,320 Money, gift-giving pressure, which is a thing for me. 432 00:16:06,320 --> 00:16:08,040 I love getting the perfect gift, so I 433 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:10,240 feel big pressure when it comes to that. 434 00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:14,280 Excessive commitments, lack of time, 435 00:16:14,280 --> 00:16:18,240 unrealistic expectations, which I think is a huge one. 436 00:16:18,240 --> 00:16:24,120 And the number one holiday stressor is hosting the holiday. 437 00:16:24,120 --> 00:16:27,520 I've never been happier that you had to do research for all 438 00:16:27,520 --> 00:16:33,200 of this because you are just talking about yourself. 439 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:34,560 This is just an episode about Karin. 440 00:16:34,560 --> 00:16:35,840 Well, so it's funny. 441 00:16:35,840 --> 00:16:39,920 When you do the moon stuff, like all that moon stuff. 442 00:16:39,920 --> 00:16:40,640 That one time. 443 00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:42,360 That one time we did an episode about the moon. 444 00:16:42,360 --> 00:16:45,360 No, but most of the 99,000 episodes 445 00:16:45,360 --> 00:16:48,120 that we've done, Victoria knows 99% more 446 00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:49,160 than I do. 447 00:16:49,160 --> 00:16:54,080 And I sit here and I throw in my two cents. 448 00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:57,080 And I love it because I just get to sit here and just be like, 449 00:16:57,080 --> 00:16:58,160 yeah, I'm learning stuff. 450 00:16:58,160 --> 00:16:58,840 I love this. 451 00:16:58,840 --> 00:17:01,320 But when I have to sit down and research, 452 00:17:01,320 --> 00:17:03,080 I'm like, oh my god, it's me. 453 00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:04,440 Hi, I'm the problem. 454 00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:05,720 It's me. 455 00:17:05,720 --> 00:17:08,600 Oh, finally, it's clicked. 456 00:17:08,600 --> 00:17:10,840 Oh my goodness. 457 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:12,440 Well, I was sitting there thinking, 458 00:17:12,440 --> 00:17:16,680 what we list out our episodes weeks in advance. 459 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:19,440 And I was like, what do we want to talk about? 460 00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:21,480 Like, what are people interested in? 461 00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:24,400 And it's really what are we interested in at the moment. 462 00:17:24,400 --> 00:17:27,160 And I'm interested in the differences between pressure 463 00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:30,880 and stress and why I always get this way during Christmas 464 00:17:30,880 --> 00:17:32,280 because I don't want to feel this way. 465 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:34,320 I just want to enjoy it and live in the moment. 466 00:17:34,320 --> 00:17:36,360 And it's so hard. 467 00:17:36,360 --> 00:17:39,320 One of our first episodes was how much we don't have time, 468 00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:39,920 but you do. 469 00:17:39,920 --> 00:17:40,400 But you do. 470 00:17:40,400 --> 00:17:41,120 Well, we do have time. 471 00:17:41,120 --> 00:17:42,200 There's always time. 472 00:17:42,200 --> 00:17:45,680 But we say that, oh, I only need how many more hours 473 00:17:45,680 --> 00:17:47,400 in the day. 474 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:48,640 There's time. 475 00:17:48,640 --> 00:17:49,480 Like, we have it. 476 00:17:49,480 --> 00:17:51,960 But we stress ourselves out. 477 00:17:51,960 --> 00:17:55,240 Sometimes we prioritize the wrong things. 478 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:55,960 Exactly. 479 00:17:55,960 --> 00:17:57,920 So like, there is time. 480 00:17:57,920 --> 00:18:01,200 And no, you don't have to go to that party. 481 00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:02,520 And it's going to be OK. 482 00:18:02,520 --> 00:18:04,400 Like, you miss out on it. 483 00:18:04,400 --> 00:18:05,160 It's OK. 484 00:18:05,160 --> 00:18:09,160 No, if I've learned one thing during this podcast, 485 00:18:09,160 --> 00:18:11,760 I mean, I have some jo-mo. 486 00:18:11,760 --> 00:18:13,120 Joy of missing out. 487 00:18:13,120 --> 00:18:16,360 I mean, I have no problem with that. 488 00:18:16,360 --> 00:18:19,720 You don't have to get every single teacher their gift 489 00:18:19,720 --> 00:18:21,640 by the time their school ends. 490 00:18:21,640 --> 00:18:23,480 If they get it in January, that's OK. 491 00:18:23,480 --> 00:18:24,400 Right, right, right, right. 492 00:18:24,400 --> 00:18:24,880 No. 493 00:18:24,880 --> 00:18:26,440 They'll kind of be nice for them. 494 00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:27,680 They get that little. 495 00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:31,240 But like, stuff like that, that we put so much pressure on, 496 00:18:31,240 --> 00:18:33,320 which I think I'm now understanding all of your, 497 00:18:33,320 --> 00:18:35,920 all like the differentiation of it, 498 00:18:35,920 --> 00:18:37,680 we put the pressure on. 499 00:18:37,680 --> 00:18:38,080 Right. 500 00:18:38,080 --> 00:18:39,000 We put it on ourselves. 501 00:18:39,000 --> 00:18:40,880 We dress ourselves up. 502 00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:42,080 In an unhealthy way. 503 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:47,400 Not the healthy pressure to an unhealthy extent, I think. 504 00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,360 All right, let's get into some tips 505 00:18:49,360 --> 00:18:53,640 on managing the pressure that has now turned into stress 506 00:18:53,640 --> 00:18:55,680 for you over the holidays. 507 00:18:55,680 --> 00:18:58,320 Number one, if you're hosting, don't. 508 00:18:58,320 --> 00:18:59,600 That's literally what it said. 509 00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:00,680 Oh, my God. 510 00:19:00,680 --> 00:19:01,320 Don't. 511 00:19:01,320 --> 00:19:04,640 If that's a high stress situation for you, don't do it. 512 00:19:04,640 --> 00:19:05,120 Yeah. 513 00:19:05,120 --> 00:19:06,600 Like, don't do it. 514 00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:10,840 I'm not doing it this year for the first time in many years, 515 00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:12,920 because people naturally come to my house 516 00:19:12,920 --> 00:19:16,360 because I have the space for it, and I'm not doing it. 517 00:19:16,360 --> 00:19:19,760 So, you know, I said no, and something good came out of it. 518 00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:20,520 So it's fine. 519 00:19:20,520 --> 00:19:21,920 So if you're hosting. 520 00:19:21,920 --> 00:19:23,640 Well, Jerry's still out, we'll see. 521 00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:25,160 We'll let you know. 522 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:27,520 Don't do it if you don't want to do it. 523 00:19:27,520 --> 00:19:32,480 If you can handle the pressure and don't, if you can't. 524 00:19:32,480 --> 00:19:39,240 Money, the biggest stressor of the Christmas season, I think. 525 00:19:39,240 --> 00:19:42,000 I mean, get yourself on a budget and stick to it. 526 00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:44,040 That sounds easier said than done. 527 00:19:44,040 --> 00:19:45,920 Get paid first. 528 00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:46,720 Oh, it's coming. 529 00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:51,160 And then put yourself in a budget and then cry every time 530 00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:53,280 you have to buy a Christmas present. 531 00:19:53,280 --> 00:19:56,800 No, don't do that, because it says keep the reason 532 00:19:56,800 --> 00:19:58,720 for the season front and center. 533 00:19:58,720 --> 00:20:01,120 And the reason for the season is not about money. 534 00:20:01,120 --> 00:20:02,200 It's about time. 535 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:06,680 Make it more about spending time and less about the actual, 536 00:20:06,680 --> 00:20:08,760 like, biggest gift of the year. 537 00:20:08,760 --> 00:20:12,680 I would have done that had you kept our pact of not buying 538 00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:14,040 Christmas presents for each other. 539 00:20:14,040 --> 00:20:18,560 I mean, I got you small stuff that add up to a lot. 540 00:20:18,560 --> 00:20:20,520 And you put pressure on that. 541 00:20:20,520 --> 00:20:21,120 No. 542 00:20:21,120 --> 00:20:22,520 Yeah. 543 00:20:22,520 --> 00:20:24,760 I like to buy things for you. 544 00:20:24,760 --> 00:20:25,840 Doesn't matter. 545 00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:30,080 When we make a pact that we're going to be equal and not 546 00:20:30,080 --> 00:20:33,600 spend money that neither of us have, 547 00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:36,200 you can't debunk that pact. 548 00:20:36,200 --> 00:20:36,720 You know what? 549 00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:37,080 That's fine. 550 00:20:37,080 --> 00:20:38,960 I'm going to keep half of it for myself because I really 551 00:20:38,960 --> 00:20:40,520 like it debunked. 552 00:20:40,520 --> 00:20:41,800 Well, I've already bought stuff. 553 00:20:41,800 --> 00:20:44,160 So you better give it to me. 554 00:20:44,160 --> 00:20:45,960 Last one in the money. 555 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:48,640 Cut down on exposure to social media, 556 00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:50,840 which I think is the most important when you're 557 00:20:50,840 --> 00:20:52,280 talking about money and Christmas, 558 00:20:52,280 --> 00:20:53,480 because what happens? 559 00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:54,880 You're constantly on social media. 560 00:20:54,880 --> 00:20:56,240 What is social media doing? 561 00:20:56,240 --> 00:20:59,680 Sending you ads for things that you, I'm quoting right now, 562 00:20:59,680 --> 00:21:03,520 absolutely need to buy for your child or your mom 563 00:21:03,520 --> 00:21:05,440 or your dad. 564 00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:06,840 If you don't see it. 565 00:21:06,840 --> 00:21:08,880 And it's not blasting you in the face. 566 00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:10,600 You clearly look around. 567 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:11,680 You don't need anything. 568 00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:13,080 We don't need anything. 569 00:21:13,080 --> 00:21:17,480 I saw a lot of them this morning at 4.45 570 00:21:17,480 --> 00:21:19,920 when I was watching all of these videos, 571 00:21:19,920 --> 00:21:22,480 but I didn't need to be watching. 572 00:21:22,480 --> 00:21:24,800 But did you like the little boy playing the guitar? 573 00:21:24,800 --> 00:21:25,600 Oh my god. 574 00:21:25,600 --> 00:21:28,120 So cute, right? 575 00:21:28,120 --> 00:21:28,640 Next one. 576 00:21:28,640 --> 00:21:31,080 Yeah. 577 00:21:31,080 --> 00:21:33,920 Struggling with expectations. 578 00:21:33,920 --> 00:21:36,400 Lots of stress comes from the I should 579 00:21:36,400 --> 00:21:39,840 or we should or what they should, what the holidays should 580 00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:42,360 look like in your mind. 581 00:21:42,360 --> 00:21:44,640 And that's not real life. 582 00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:46,720 That's accepting change, I feel like. 583 00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:46,960 Yeah. 584 00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:49,120 I literally wrote down, let it go. 585 00:21:49,120 --> 00:21:52,200 And then I wrote, don't sing it. 586 00:21:52,200 --> 00:21:52,680 Oh. 587 00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:54,160 I'm laughing. 588 00:21:57,160 --> 00:21:59,440 Let it go. 589 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:00,360 Let it go. 590 00:22:00,360 --> 00:22:01,640 That's true, though. 591 00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:05,760 And you're the expectation queen when it comes to. 592 00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:06,840 It's hard for me. 593 00:22:06,840 --> 00:22:07,960 Well, everything. 594 00:22:07,960 --> 00:22:09,480 But when it comes to Christmas. 595 00:22:09,480 --> 00:22:09,960 Yes. 596 00:22:09,960 --> 00:22:14,040 Because you want it to be how magical it was. 597 00:22:14,040 --> 00:22:17,080 And I truly think it's never going 598 00:22:17,080 --> 00:22:21,480 to be the magic the way we had it as kids just due to the times. 599 00:22:21,480 --> 00:22:23,200 But I think it can still be magical. 600 00:22:23,200 --> 00:22:24,800 And it's just in a different way. 601 00:22:24,800 --> 00:22:25,920 Yeah. 602 00:22:25,920 --> 00:22:26,640 Would you? 603 00:22:26,640 --> 00:22:27,480 Not accepting. 604 00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:27,880 No. 605 00:22:27,880 --> 00:22:31,440 I have a very hard time with accepting change. 606 00:22:31,440 --> 00:22:34,640 So when this year our holidays are changing a little bit 607 00:22:34,640 --> 00:22:37,720 and I'm, Victoria is always just like, accept it. 608 00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:38,680 This is the way it is. 609 00:22:38,680 --> 00:22:41,280 You can be unhappy about it and complain. 610 00:22:41,280 --> 00:22:46,360 Or you can just accept it and enjoy what we are doing. 611 00:22:46,360 --> 00:22:49,200 Well, make new traditions. 612 00:22:49,200 --> 00:22:49,800 That's what I have. 613 00:22:49,800 --> 00:22:51,400 Create new family traditions. 614 00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:52,880 All change is hard. 615 00:22:52,880 --> 00:22:56,240 Even if you're great with change or you're not great with change, 616 00:22:56,240 --> 00:22:56,920 it's different. 617 00:22:56,920 --> 00:22:58,880 And yeah, if you are like me and you 618 00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:02,120 want everything to be the way it was in 1985, 619 00:23:02,120 --> 00:23:05,160 then yeah, you're going to have a little bit of a hard time. 620 00:23:05,160 --> 00:23:06,920 I mean, you hear it, right? 621 00:23:06,920 --> 00:23:08,160 You hear the sentence. 622 00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:09,840 I'm giggling. 623 00:23:09,840 --> 00:23:10,840 Oh. 624 00:23:10,840 --> 00:23:11,840 Oh. 625 00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:14,080 Oh. 626 00:23:14,080 --> 00:23:15,680 Expectations huge. 627 00:23:15,680 --> 00:23:17,080 This isn't just the holiday thing. 628 00:23:17,080 --> 00:23:21,600 Expectation is like the catalyst for all pressure and stress, 629 00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:22,320 I think. 630 00:23:22,320 --> 00:23:22,800 Yeah. 631 00:23:22,800 --> 00:23:23,960 And I mean, we all do it. 632 00:23:23,960 --> 00:23:25,240 Because it's made up in your head. 633 00:23:25,240 --> 00:23:25,880 Yeah. 634 00:23:25,880 --> 00:23:28,320 And you're putting pressure on a situation 635 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:31,000 that doesn't need to be there. 636 00:23:31,000 --> 00:23:34,040 The next one, I think, is extra hard and something 637 00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:36,840 that we haven't had to go through during the holidays. 638 00:23:36,840 --> 00:23:37,880 But a lot of people do. 639 00:23:37,880 --> 00:23:39,400 And that's grief. 640 00:23:39,400 --> 00:23:41,720 That's a big stressor for the holidays. 641 00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:45,640 It's a big, you know, every first when you're dealing 642 00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:46,480 with grief is hard. 643 00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:47,680 And Christmas is a big one. 644 00:23:47,680 --> 00:23:48,520 Yeah. 645 00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:51,720 Yeah, that's whether you're going through it alone 646 00:23:51,720 --> 00:23:53,240 or as a unit. 647 00:23:53,240 --> 00:23:53,840 Yeah. 648 00:23:53,840 --> 00:23:55,560 Grief. 649 00:23:55,560 --> 00:23:56,800 Grief is tough. 650 00:23:56,800 --> 00:23:57,360 Grief is tough. 651 00:23:57,360 --> 00:23:57,920 But you know what? 652 00:23:57,920 --> 00:23:59,640 It is better with people. 653 00:23:59,640 --> 00:24:00,600 That's one of the things. 654 00:24:00,600 --> 00:24:03,560 It's admitting and telling people you're having a hard time. 655 00:24:03,560 --> 00:24:05,240 Don't hide it. 656 00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:06,720 You're having a hard time. 657 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:07,360 Admit it. 658 00:24:07,360 --> 00:24:11,640 I just saw an Instagram, I guess, a meme or a picture that 659 00:24:11,640 --> 00:24:14,480 says, it's OK if you're not feeling merry and bright. 660 00:24:14,480 --> 00:24:14,960 Yeah. 661 00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:16,680 It's OK. 662 00:24:16,680 --> 00:24:21,040 And I think there is a piece of maybe expectation 663 00:24:21,040 --> 00:24:23,240 that the holidays are just chipper all the time. 664 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:25,440 And everything makes you happy. 665 00:24:25,440 --> 00:24:30,520 And you're at this weird buddy-the-elf level of sugar 666 00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:33,360 and why are you looking at me? 667 00:24:33,360 --> 00:24:38,440 Because I'm talking to you, number one and number two. 668 00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:43,960 It's just that's not, I think it's more OK these days to. 669 00:24:43,960 --> 00:24:47,120 People are more aware of mental health and being sad. 670 00:24:47,120 --> 00:24:47,800 Yeah. 671 00:24:47,800 --> 00:24:50,400 Like it says to not force yourself to celebrate. 672 00:24:50,400 --> 00:24:52,040 If you don't feel like celebrating, don't. 673 00:24:52,040 --> 00:24:52,520 Yeah. 674 00:24:52,520 --> 00:24:56,960 Like and don't compare this year's holiday to holidays 675 00:24:56,960 --> 00:24:59,440 in the past because that's just going to put you down 676 00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:01,800 a rabbit hole of depression. 677 00:25:01,800 --> 00:25:04,840 So you just have to sit in it for a little bit. 678 00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:07,120 And if you don't want to celebrate, don't. 679 00:25:07,120 --> 00:25:09,520 Wow. 680 00:25:09,520 --> 00:25:10,920 Insert applause. 681 00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:15,080 I'm sorry. 682 00:25:15,080 --> 00:25:16,240 I'm waiting for it to end. 683 00:25:16,240 --> 00:25:17,240 It hasn't ended yet. 684 00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:17,800 I'll do it twice. 685 00:25:17,800 --> 00:25:19,720 OK. 686 00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:20,520 Third time's the charm. 687 00:25:20,520 --> 00:25:20,840 No. 688 00:25:20,840 --> 00:25:21,120 OK. 689 00:25:21,120 --> 00:25:21,600 All right. 690 00:25:21,600 --> 00:25:23,800 You don't deserve three. 691 00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:27,240 Last one, feeling disappointed. 692 00:25:27,240 --> 00:25:27,720 About what? 693 00:25:27,720 --> 00:25:29,440 About the holidays. 694 00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:32,320 So feeling disappointed that you didn't get to make it 695 00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:34,680 as magical as in your mind you thought you wanted to. 696 00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:37,920 Or feeling disappointed that those traditions in your family 697 00:25:37,920 --> 00:25:38,760 have changed. 698 00:25:38,760 --> 00:25:42,200 Or feeling disappointed that you couldn't buy the perfect gift 699 00:25:42,200 --> 00:25:44,080 that you wanted to for that person. 700 00:25:44,080 --> 00:25:45,840 And what it says is to practice gratitude. 701 00:25:45,840 --> 00:25:47,800 And I know that's what Victoria constantly tells us 702 00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,200 to get a journal. 703 00:25:49,200 --> 00:25:50,680 But it's a practice. 704 00:25:50,680 --> 00:25:54,480 You don't just wake up unless you've been practicing and say, 705 00:25:54,480 --> 00:25:56,880 I am thankful for this. 706 00:25:56,880 --> 00:25:59,360 All of the things that I do have, 707 00:25:59,360 --> 00:26:02,560 instead of all the things that you don't have. 708 00:26:02,560 --> 00:26:07,080 So that's like a big end. 709 00:26:07,080 --> 00:26:10,400 Sorry, notice when you're selling yourself short. 710 00:26:10,400 --> 00:26:12,880 You're doing great things this holiday season. 711 00:26:12,880 --> 00:26:14,720 You're doing great things all the time. 712 00:26:14,720 --> 00:26:17,760 Remind yourself of how well you're doing 713 00:26:17,760 --> 00:26:19,400 and stop selling yourself short. 714 00:26:19,400 --> 00:26:19,680 Yeah. 715 00:26:19,680 --> 00:26:24,400 The past two yoga classes that I taught at Seafit, 716 00:26:24,400 --> 00:26:28,360 I've done three rounds of three affirmations 717 00:26:28,360 --> 00:26:33,120 that they could opt to say in their head as I spoke or just 718 00:26:33,120 --> 00:26:34,760 sit, listen, and just take it in. 719 00:26:34,760 --> 00:26:36,920 But it was I am worthy. 720 00:26:36,920 --> 00:26:37,600 I am enough. 721 00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:39,600 And I am doing the best that I can. 722 00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:41,480 I've seen people repost that. 723 00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:43,320 And I just I didn't know you were saying that. 724 00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:47,040 Because right now I feel like everyone feels like they're not 725 00:26:47,040 --> 00:26:49,560 hitting the mark in small ways. 726 00:26:49,560 --> 00:26:52,640 It's like, I was late to class. 727 00:26:52,640 --> 00:26:56,080 And I really why am I always late to class? 728 00:26:56,080 --> 00:26:59,600 And then they get upset or, oh, I missed this event 729 00:26:59,600 --> 00:27:03,600 because of ABC and D or, oh, gosh, I didn't get that present 730 00:27:03,600 --> 00:27:03,960 in time. 731 00:27:03,960 --> 00:27:05,360 And now it's not the right one. 732 00:27:05,360 --> 00:27:06,720 And they're going to be so sad. 733 00:27:06,720 --> 00:27:08,440 No, you did the best that you could. 734 00:27:08,440 --> 00:27:09,520 You did what you could. 735 00:27:09,520 --> 00:27:14,400 And what hopefully the other end of whatever you're feeling, 736 00:27:14,400 --> 00:27:18,320 the people around you, are just appreciative and grateful. 737 00:27:18,320 --> 00:27:19,920 But if they're not, you just have 738 00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:22,480 to know that you're doing the best that you can. 739 00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:24,680 And that's all that you can ask for in life. 740 00:27:24,680 --> 00:27:25,760 I wake up every morning. 741 00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:29,680 I don't do the gratitude that you were just talking about of, 742 00:27:29,680 --> 00:27:31,240 like, here's what I have. 743 00:27:31,240 --> 00:27:34,760 And here's what I'm grateful for, which I think throughout the day, 744 00:27:34,760 --> 00:27:37,440 maybe pieces of it, I do that. 745 00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:40,560 But I wake up and I sit up in bed before I 746 00:27:40,560 --> 00:27:41,880 put my feet on the floor. 747 00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:46,680 And I say, whatever is meant for me will not pass me by. 748 00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:50,400 Ooh, whatever is meant for me will not pass me by. 749 00:27:50,400 --> 00:27:54,000 So whatever I basically meaning, and I guess pertaining 750 00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:56,680 to the holiday, whatever I get done, 751 00:27:56,680 --> 00:27:58,080 I was meant to get done. 752 00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:01,200 Whatever I don't, I was meant to not get done today. 753 00:28:01,200 --> 00:28:02,600 It's all OK. 754 00:28:02,600 --> 00:28:06,320 And it's going to find me if it's meant to find me. 755 00:28:06,320 --> 00:28:06,600 Right. 756 00:28:06,600 --> 00:28:07,720 So don't try so hard. 757 00:28:07,720 --> 00:28:08,000 Don't. 758 00:28:08,000 --> 00:28:08,800 Yeah. 759 00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:11,160 Basically, don't try just trust in what's out there. 760 00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:12,360 Trust? 761 00:28:12,360 --> 00:28:16,200 I mean, trust the process, if you will. 762 00:28:16,200 --> 00:28:17,160 Now, what does that reference? 763 00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:17,840 I don't know. 764 00:28:17,840 --> 00:28:20,440 Oh, you think it has something to do with sports? 765 00:28:20,440 --> 00:28:21,880 It's the 76ers. 766 00:28:21,880 --> 00:28:22,760 Oh, yeah. 767 00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:24,320 Sports. 768 00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:25,320 Sports. 769 00:28:25,320 --> 00:28:26,320 Sports. 770 00:28:26,320 --> 00:28:27,320 Sports. 771 00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:29,320 Sports. 772 00:28:29,320 --> 00:28:31,440 Oh. 773 00:28:31,440 --> 00:28:33,160 I don't trust the process. 774 00:28:33,160 --> 00:28:34,600 I don't trust it. 775 00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:35,800 But trust the process. 776 00:28:35,800 --> 00:28:39,080 Like, I need to do that more myself when 777 00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:40,760 it comes to sports and my life. 778 00:28:40,760 --> 00:28:41,360 Oh, no. 779 00:28:41,360 --> 00:28:42,320 Just give up on this. 780 00:28:42,320 --> 00:28:43,200 Just give up on this. 781 00:28:43,200 --> 00:28:44,360 Let's do one thing. 782 00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:45,480 OK. 783 00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:47,440 You know, I tell you every day, there's 784 00:28:47,440 --> 00:28:48,960 enough I want to take into the Christmas lights. 785 00:28:48,960 --> 00:28:49,640 I want to do this. 786 00:28:49,640 --> 00:28:52,200 I want to take them to Dilworth Park in the city. 787 00:28:52,200 --> 00:28:53,480 I want to we got to do cookies. 788 00:28:53,480 --> 00:28:55,560 We got to do whatever happens, happens. 789 00:28:55,560 --> 00:28:56,160 And guess what? 790 00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,640 The kids will not that they won't remember because they will 791 00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:03,560 because we remember, but they are loving everything. 792 00:29:03,560 --> 00:29:05,880 And going overboard and doing too much 793 00:29:05,880 --> 00:29:07,560 is overwhelming to them too. 794 00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:09,880 Yeah, sometimes they're exhausted by the end of the weekend 795 00:29:09,880 --> 00:29:11,240 and they have to go back to school. 796 00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:13,240 And it's like Monday, but they're drained. 797 00:29:13,240 --> 00:29:13,720 Yeah. 798 00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:15,920 And you have pushed them too far. 799 00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:19,440 And then on the holiday cheer, they have to stay home from school. 800 00:29:19,440 --> 00:29:23,240 And then it's harder for me because they get sick. 801 00:29:23,240 --> 00:29:24,560 And I did that to myself. 802 00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:27,000 That's specifically for this for this season. 803 00:29:27,000 --> 00:29:31,000 But no, well, I guess it could be any weekends throughout the year. 804 00:29:31,000 --> 00:29:33,080 That's I feel like then it's like, oh, my gosh, 805 00:29:33,080 --> 00:29:35,280 we have to do all this stuff because they have a weekend 806 00:29:35,280 --> 00:29:36,160 off for President's Day. 807 00:29:36,160 --> 00:29:38,600 And then it becomes the best Valentine's Day ever. 808 00:29:38,600 --> 00:29:41,360 And then St. Patrick's Day weekend has to be great. 809 00:29:41,360 --> 00:29:43,880 It's it's an ongoing thing. 810 00:29:43,880 --> 00:29:48,200 Yeah, it's a cycle of expectation and disappointment 811 00:29:48,200 --> 00:29:50,920 because I think they go hand in hand. 812 00:29:50,920 --> 00:29:54,480 So I'm going to end this little sesh. 813 00:29:54,480 --> 00:29:58,040 We do have a game, but I'm going to end this with a quote that I found 814 00:29:58,040 --> 00:30:00,920 that I think is really important, especially now, 815 00:30:00,920 --> 00:30:04,680 because everybody's watching all these said Instagram reels. 816 00:30:04,680 --> 00:30:05,920 Santa's watching. 817 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:07,440 Santa's watching. 818 00:30:07,440 --> 00:30:09,960 And you're constantly scrolling and you're seeing everybody's 819 00:30:09,960 --> 00:30:13,320 perfect house with the white lights and everybody looks. 820 00:30:13,320 --> 00:30:14,920 Everybody's holidays look great. 821 00:30:14,920 --> 00:30:16,360 And why can't why can't my holidays? 822 00:30:16,360 --> 00:30:18,760 I don't have the money to have that. 823 00:30:18,760 --> 00:30:22,480 It's a quote that says comparison is the thief of joy. 824 00:30:23,160 --> 00:30:23,760 And it is. 825 00:30:23,760 --> 00:30:26,560 I think we've actually said it on this podcast before, 826 00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:28,520 but it really hits for the holiday season. 827 00:30:28,520 --> 00:30:32,040 Your holiday does not have to look like anybody else's. 828 00:30:32,400 --> 00:30:33,640 It is your holiday. 829 00:30:33,640 --> 00:30:35,120 It is your season. 830 00:30:35,120 --> 00:30:36,920 And when you compare it to somebody else's, 831 00:30:36,920 --> 00:30:39,640 it really sucks the joy out of the whole season. 832 00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:43,120 I think we've said comparison is the root of all evil. 833 00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:44,440 I mean, it's the same. 834 00:30:44,440 --> 00:30:45,240 I think that's what we've said before. 835 00:30:45,240 --> 00:30:45,640 Yeah. 836 00:30:45,640 --> 00:30:48,640 But the thief of joy when this is supposed to be quote unquote, 837 00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:52,720 supposed to be the most joyous season of the year. 838 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:54,680 Oh, my God. 839 00:30:54,680 --> 00:30:55,560 Like, what are we doing? 840 00:30:55,560 --> 00:30:58,760 I know, just you do you, boo boo. 841 00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:02,720 I like how you yelled it strongly. 842 00:31:04,600 --> 00:31:08,480 Because we don't want to feel pressure and we don't want to feel stress. 843 00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:12,560 We want to have some fun and we encourage you to do this with your family as well. 844 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:13,800 We're going to play a little game. 845 00:31:16,200 --> 00:31:20,160 If this doesn't have to do with Instagram videos, I'm turning you off. 846 00:31:20,960 --> 00:31:25,440 I found this while I was scrolling on the internet. 847 00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:31,560 It's called Do You Know What I Know? 848 00:31:31,560 --> 00:31:32,920 Oh, no. 849 00:31:33,600 --> 00:31:37,120 I think I know all of the answers to what Victoria is going to say. 850 00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:38,680 Story of your life. 851 00:31:39,280 --> 00:31:41,640 But we're going to say we're going to play a little icebreaker game. 852 00:31:41,640 --> 00:31:43,360 We're going to ask Victoria questions. 853 00:31:43,560 --> 00:31:45,000 I think I know the answers. 854 00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:46,680 We definitely need an icebreaker. 855 00:31:46,680 --> 00:31:48,560 Yeah, we don't know each other very well. 856 00:31:48,920 --> 00:31:51,840 But this is a really fun game to play when you're sitting around the dinner 857 00:31:51,840 --> 00:31:54,560 table at any holiday occasion. 858 00:31:54,560 --> 00:31:57,080 And we did it the other night actually with the kids. 859 00:31:57,080 --> 00:31:59,880 The kids are crazy at dinner time and I wanted them to calm down. 860 00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:04,920 And I bought a game that asks them questions like just random questions. 861 00:32:04,920 --> 00:32:06,240 What do you want to be when you grow up? 862 00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:07,560 Blah, blah, blah. 863 00:32:07,560 --> 00:32:11,440 And it calmed them down and it was really interesting to hear their answers. 864 00:32:11,440 --> 00:32:15,080 So we're going to play that with Victoria, except it has to do with Christmas. 865 00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:19,400 So number one, have you ever regifted a present? 866 00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:20,560 Yes. 867 00:32:21,480 --> 00:32:22,800 Have you ever been caught? 868 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:23,680 No. 869 00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:24,960 No. 870 00:32:24,960 --> 00:32:27,360 Well, they didn't tell me that they knew. 871 00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:28,920 So maybe. 872 00:32:29,280 --> 00:32:30,640 We're going to sidebar real quick. 873 00:32:30,640 --> 00:32:30,880 Yeah. 874 00:32:30,960 --> 00:32:35,200 Our mom regifted our uncle slash best friends. 875 00:32:35,200 --> 00:32:37,440 They came for Christmas Eve, gave her a bottle of wine. 876 00:32:37,760 --> 00:32:41,520 On Christmas morning, she realized, oh my God, I forgot to get them something. 877 00:32:41,520 --> 00:32:46,520 So she rewrapped the bottle of wine they gave her, not thinking they would notice. 878 00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:51,400 And they opened it up and said, Carmela, we gave this to this bottle to you last night. 879 00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:52,800 Last 24 hours ago. 880 00:32:52,800 --> 00:32:55,400 She was like, oh my God, I didn't think you'd notice. 881 00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:57,400 We were crying. 882 00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:58,040 Crying. 883 00:32:58,040 --> 00:32:59,040 We still talk about it. 884 00:32:59,040 --> 00:33:01,440 And that's because she was under a lot of pressure and stress. 885 00:33:01,440 --> 00:33:01,840 So. 886 00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:02,840 So. 887 00:33:04,640 --> 00:33:07,840 Next one, which ornament on your tree has the best story? 888 00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:09,880 Oh, yeah. 889 00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:13,240 She's looking, she's looking. 890 00:33:14,280 --> 00:33:15,880 Well, the one that's staring at me. 891 00:33:15,880 --> 00:33:18,720 I can see it is from 2020. 892 00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:23,040 Now, we get ornaments from mom every year, every single year, family ornaments. 893 00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:26,440 And then when we all moved out, we got to keep 894 00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:29,240 the ornaments that she bought us since we were little. 895 00:33:29,240 --> 00:33:33,680 So it was a really cool way to start like your own tree ornament decoration. 896 00:33:33,680 --> 00:33:35,120 And I do it with my kids now. 897 00:33:35,720 --> 00:33:36,520 Now, shocking. 898 00:33:36,840 --> 00:33:42,720 Now, when I travel, I try to pick up an ornament because my mug cabinet is too heavy. 899 00:33:43,320 --> 00:33:46,000 So it's fun, you know, because I don't travel often. 900 00:33:46,000 --> 00:33:47,520 So I only have three traveling ornaments. 901 00:33:47,520 --> 00:33:53,880 But the one I just looked at, I bought everyone an ornament one year trying to be mom, but it was also 2020. 902 00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:59,280 So it's a snowflake that is made out of the word F. U. C. K. 903 00:33:59,880 --> 00:34:03,520 Because 2020 was an F. U. C. K. show. 904 00:34:03,520 --> 00:34:06,720 And I thought mom would be like, oh, my God, Victoria. 905 00:34:06,720 --> 00:34:08,120 And she was like, I love it. 906 00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:08,640 Yeah. 907 00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:10,600 If you had given it to her, she would have been really upset. 908 00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:11,440 100 percent. 909 00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:16,200 All right. Which one of Santa's reindeer would you want to invite over for Christmas? 910 00:34:16,920 --> 00:34:17,560 Comet. 911 00:34:18,040 --> 00:34:19,480 Oh, OK. 912 00:34:19,480 --> 00:34:20,840 Like, are you fast? 913 00:34:21,160 --> 00:34:22,200 Are you spacey? 914 00:34:22,200 --> 00:34:23,960 Why are you named Comet? 915 00:34:23,960 --> 00:34:25,160 Got it. Love it. 916 00:34:26,160 --> 00:34:28,800 I'd probably invite Vixen. 917 00:34:28,800 --> 00:34:30,240 I knew you were going to say that. 918 00:34:30,240 --> 00:34:32,800 Just because, like, who doesn't love a reindeer named Vixen? 919 00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:34,200 Like, why are you named Vixen? 920 00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:35,200 Exactly. Why? 921 00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:36,200 Let's talk about it. 922 00:34:36,200 --> 00:34:37,200 How many STDs do you have? 923 00:34:38,200 --> 00:34:39,200 Let's talk about it. 924 00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:40,200 Let's not. 925 00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:41,200 OK. All right. Don't do that. 926 00:34:42,200 --> 00:34:45,200 What holiday song do you secretly love and listen to? 927 00:34:46,200 --> 00:34:47,200 Secretly love? 928 00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,200 Like, embarrassed? 929 00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:50,200 I shouldn't tell everybody that I like that. 930 00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:51,200 Props, yeah. 931 00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:52,200 Props, yeah. 932 00:34:54,200 --> 00:34:56,200 Are you embarrassed that I said props? 933 00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:58,200 Dominic Donkey. 934 00:34:58,200 --> 00:34:59,200 Hee-aw, hee-aw. 935 00:34:59,200 --> 00:35:00,200 You do love that song. 936 00:35:00,200 --> 00:35:01,200 She loves that song. 937 00:35:01,200 --> 00:35:02,200 I'm not embarrassed by it, though. 938 00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:04,200 I'm embarrassed for you. 939 00:35:05,200 --> 00:35:11,200 OK. Thinking of your co-workers, which of your co-workers is most likely to still believe in Santa Claus? 940 00:35:12,200 --> 00:35:13,200 Me. 941 00:35:14,200 --> 00:35:15,200 That's true. 942 00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:21,200 If you were Santa Claus, what type of cookie would you want to be left out for you on Christmas Eve? 943 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:22,200 Yeah. 944 00:35:23,200 --> 00:35:24,200 All right. 945 00:35:24,200 --> 00:35:25,200 Two. Two kinds. 946 00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:26,200 OK. 947 00:35:26,200 --> 00:35:27,200 Yeah. 948 00:35:27,200 --> 00:35:28,200 I'm a hefty Santa. 949 00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:33,200 An Oreo cookie with chocolate chips. 950 00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:34,200 Oh. 951 00:35:34,200 --> 00:35:36,200 And I didn't mean to say Oreo. 952 00:35:36,200 --> 00:35:40,200 I said Oreo, but I was reading in my head oatmeal. 953 00:35:40,200 --> 00:35:42,200 I was thinking, what? 954 00:35:42,200 --> 00:35:43,200 I've never seen this cookie before. 955 00:35:43,200 --> 00:35:44,200 Yeah. 956 00:35:44,200 --> 00:35:46,200 Would you slow down and stop stressing out? 957 00:35:46,200 --> 00:35:48,200 I'm blacking out right now. 958 00:35:48,200 --> 00:35:50,200 I cannot believe that just came out of my mouth. 959 00:35:50,200 --> 00:35:52,200 An oatmeal cookie with chocolate chips. 960 00:35:52,200 --> 00:35:53,200 OK. 961 00:35:53,200 --> 00:35:56,200 As well as a s'mores cookie. 962 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:57,200 Yeah. 963 00:35:57,200 --> 00:35:58,200 I'm into that. 964 00:35:58,200 --> 00:36:00,200 However you make them, I don't know. 965 00:36:00,200 --> 00:36:01,200 I'm into that. 966 00:36:01,200 --> 00:36:03,200 I would, I agree. 967 00:36:03,200 --> 00:36:04,200 Yeah. 968 00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:09,200 Which family tradition from your childhood do you carry into your holidays now? 969 00:36:10,200 --> 00:36:12,200 Every Christmas Eve. 970 00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:16,200 And we do dinner with our immediate unit. 971 00:36:16,200 --> 00:36:21,200 And we always have a, an Italian dish called aliol. 972 00:36:21,200 --> 00:36:24,200 Carmella calls it aliolia. 973 00:36:24,200 --> 00:36:27,200 Drives me insane. 974 00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:35,200 But it is supposed to be, or it usually is, capolini or spaghetti with olive oil and anchovies. 975 00:36:35,200 --> 00:36:36,200 And anchovies. 976 00:36:36,200 --> 00:36:39,200 And mom never puts enough anchovies in for our liking. 977 00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:45,200 And she does though, like she puts in, I think we're up to 15 to 20 cans of anchovies. 978 00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:46,200 Not enough. 979 00:36:46,200 --> 00:36:48,200 And we're never satisfied. 980 00:36:48,200 --> 00:36:52,200 But it is our, we have never strayed from that tradition on Christmas Eve. 981 00:36:52,200 --> 00:36:56,200 And if you are new to the family and coming in, you better get on board. 982 00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:57,200 Better get on board. 983 00:36:57,200 --> 00:36:58,200 Or step out. 984 00:36:58,200 --> 00:37:01,200 But at the same time, we've had a lot of people that just don't eat it. 985 00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:02,200 Yeah. 986 00:37:02,200 --> 00:37:04,200 But it's our favorite. 987 00:37:04,200 --> 00:37:10,200 And at the side part to that tradition is we curse on Christmas Eve dinner. 988 00:37:10,200 --> 00:37:11,200 Oh my God. 989 00:37:11,200 --> 00:37:12,200 Yeah. 990 00:37:12,200 --> 00:37:18,200 It's subsided because the kids are around now, but our mom lets us curse on Christmas Eve dinner. 991 00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:19,200 Yeah. 992 00:37:19,200 --> 00:37:21,200 I don't know with who do you think? 993 00:37:21,200 --> 00:37:22,200 Billy. 994 00:37:22,200 --> 00:37:28,200 Well, yes, but I, I forget how it got accepted and then passed on every year. 995 00:37:28,200 --> 00:37:33,200 And then when, oh my gosh, when Andrew came along, came along, I remember the first year he was like, why? 996 00:37:33,200 --> 00:37:35,200 Died and confused. 997 00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:40,200 And he would be like, and now he's like, what? 998 00:37:40,200 --> 00:37:41,200 There's not enough. 999 00:37:41,200 --> 00:37:46,200 I honestly think mom just lost control and was like, you're home for Christmas. 1000 00:37:46,200 --> 00:37:48,200 I don't even care anymore. 1001 00:37:48,200 --> 00:37:50,200 It's like the weirdest tradition ever. 1002 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:52,200 And then you started having children and it stopped. 1003 00:37:52,200 --> 00:37:56,200 So when, sorry, when they're, yeah, you should be when they're old enough. 1004 00:37:56,200 --> 00:37:57,200 We'll start again. 1005 00:37:57,200 --> 00:37:58,200 All right. 1006 00:37:58,200 --> 00:37:59,200 Finish the video. 1007 00:37:59,200 --> 00:38:03,200 You should be when they're old enough. 1008 00:38:03,200 --> 00:38:04,200 All right. 1009 00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:05,200 Finish the sentence. 1010 00:38:05,200 --> 00:38:08,200 It's just not the holidays without being Crosby. 1011 00:38:08,200 --> 00:38:09,200 Yeah. 1012 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:11,200 Oh, good answer. 1013 00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:12,200 Good answer. 1014 00:38:12,200 --> 00:38:14,200 What's your favorite Christmas movie? 1015 00:38:14,200 --> 00:38:15,200 White Christmas. 1016 00:38:15,200 --> 00:38:16,200 Nice. 1017 00:38:16,200 --> 00:38:17,200 Just because it's tradition. 1018 00:38:17,200 --> 00:38:21,200 But of course, elf is like, you can't do it without all. 1019 00:38:21,200 --> 00:38:22,200 Oh, but then there's love. 1020 00:38:22,200 --> 00:38:23,200 Stop it. 1021 00:38:23,200 --> 00:38:26,200 Love actually is number one. 1022 00:38:26,200 --> 00:38:30,200 Yeah, but then there's the other one that I really like the holiday. 1023 00:38:30,200 --> 00:38:31,200 No. 1024 00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:32,200 Oh, yes. 1025 00:38:32,200 --> 00:38:34,200 Then there's your cutoff. 1026 00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:35,200 You're cut off. 1027 00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:36,200 No, it's the one. 1028 00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:38,200 Oh, with all the big actors. 1029 00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:40,200 Oh my God. 1030 00:38:40,200 --> 00:38:42,200 The family stone. 1031 00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:45,200 Oh, is the Jessica Sarah Jessica Parker? 1032 00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:46,200 Yes. 1033 00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:47,200 Yeah. 1034 00:38:47,200 --> 00:38:48,200 I've never seen it. 1035 00:38:48,200 --> 00:38:49,200 I know. 1036 00:38:49,200 --> 00:38:50,200 I've never seen it. 1037 00:38:50,200 --> 00:38:51,200 I think it's the family stone. 1038 00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:52,200 I've never seen it. 1039 00:38:52,200 --> 00:38:54,200 This was supposed to be a short game, by the way. 1040 00:38:54,200 --> 00:38:56,200 One of my favorites. 1041 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,200 All right, I'll watch it this year. 1042 00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:01,200 You really, I think you would really like it. 1043 00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:05,200 What present are you most excited about giving this year? 1044 00:39:05,200 --> 00:39:06,200 Not yours. 1045 00:39:06,200 --> 00:39:09,200 I was forced to buy them. 1046 00:39:09,200 --> 00:39:10,200 Just kidding. 1047 00:39:10,200 --> 00:39:22,200 I got every single child that I give presents to the same book and or books of the same 1048 00:39:22,200 --> 00:39:25,200 author and artist. 1049 00:39:25,200 --> 00:39:26,200 Uh-huh. 1050 00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:28,200 And I'm very excited about them. 1051 00:39:28,200 --> 00:39:30,200 Is it about moons and meditation? 1052 00:39:30,200 --> 00:39:33,200 I'm going to take that not as an insult. 1053 00:39:33,200 --> 00:39:37,200 I'm going to take that as you pretending to know who I am. 1054 00:39:37,200 --> 00:39:42,200 And kind of like one of them is called maybe I actually just gave one to my yoga friend 1055 00:39:42,200 --> 00:39:44,200 who does a lot of kid yoga. 1056 00:39:44,200 --> 00:39:46,200 So I'm excited for all the kids this year. 1057 00:39:46,200 --> 00:39:47,200 All right, that's good. 1058 00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:48,200 Not you. 1059 00:39:48,200 --> 00:39:49,200 Okay. 1060 00:39:49,200 --> 00:39:50,200 We've established that. 1061 00:39:50,200 --> 00:39:52,200 You'll no pressure with your gift. 1062 00:39:52,200 --> 00:39:55,200 What is your holiday beverage of choice? 1063 00:39:55,200 --> 00:39:56,200 Water. 1064 00:39:56,200 --> 00:39:58,200 I don't know. 1065 00:39:58,200 --> 00:40:00,200 What's your holiday beverage of choice? 1066 00:40:00,200 --> 00:40:01,200 Water. 1067 00:40:01,200 --> 00:40:02,200 You love a good gin and tonic. 1068 00:40:02,200 --> 00:40:03,200 Are we getting higher? 1069 00:40:03,200 --> 00:40:04,200 Water. 1070 00:40:04,200 --> 00:40:05,200 Water. 1071 00:40:05,200 --> 00:40:08,200 I do love gin and tonic, but that's not a holiday. 1072 00:40:08,200 --> 00:40:12,200 Before I stopped drinking, we did one year of a Bloody Mary morning. 1073 00:40:12,200 --> 00:40:13,200 We did. 1074 00:40:13,200 --> 00:40:15,200 Christmas and I do love that. 1075 00:40:15,200 --> 00:40:16,200 Same. 1076 00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:17,200 Okay. 1077 00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:18,200 This is a hard one. 1078 00:40:18,200 --> 00:40:19,200 One of our last ones. 1079 00:40:19,200 --> 00:40:26,200 What three words would you use to describe the past year without getting too deep? 1080 00:40:26,200 --> 00:40:29,200 Total shit show. 1081 00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:32,200 Done. 1082 00:40:32,200 --> 00:40:35,200 We don't need to get deep because that is self explanatory. 1083 00:40:35,200 --> 00:40:37,200 That's about as deep as you can understand. 1084 00:40:37,200 --> 00:40:43,200 The last icebreaker question of the day is very serious. 1085 00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:48,200 Have you ever made a dreidel out of clay? 1086 00:40:48,200 --> 00:40:55,200 I thought about that one all by myself. 1087 00:40:55,200 --> 00:40:58,200 But have you? 1088 00:40:58,200 --> 00:41:01,200 Have you dreidel dreidel dreidel? 1089 00:41:01,200 --> 00:41:03,200 I made you out of clay. 1090 00:41:03,200 --> 00:41:04,200 No. 1091 00:41:04,200 --> 00:41:06,200 Guess what? 1092 00:41:06,200 --> 00:41:08,200 You won. 1093 00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:11,200 I think I lost that last one. 1094 00:41:11,200 --> 00:41:13,200 That was supposed to be rapid fire. 1095 00:41:13,200 --> 00:41:16,200 And it, I think was as long as the episode. 1096 00:41:16,200 --> 00:41:22,200 So here's a piece of expectation you need to get rid of because every time we do rapid 1097 00:41:22,200 --> 00:41:25,200 fire, I never rapidly fire. 1098 00:41:25,200 --> 00:41:27,200 I know because number one, your brain doesn't work that fast. 1099 00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:31,200 Number two, you always have way more to say than a yes or no. 1100 00:41:31,200 --> 00:41:34,200 And you have to explain. 1101 00:41:34,200 --> 00:41:37,200 And yeah, I feel bad for all the answers I didn't say. 1102 00:41:37,200 --> 00:41:38,200 Okay. 1103 00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:45,200 Well, I won't feel disappointed or feel any grief or, you know, sad expectations from 1104 00:41:45,200 --> 00:41:46,200 you. 1105 00:41:46,200 --> 00:41:50,200 I will just have to accept that you are who you are and enjoy the holidays anyway. 1106 00:41:50,200 --> 00:41:53,200 I feel like you're begrudging that sentiment. 1107 00:41:53,200 --> 00:41:55,200 It's getting tense in here. 1108 00:41:55,200 --> 00:42:00,200 People, the holidays are coming. 1109 00:42:00,200 --> 00:42:01,200 I really, I really enjoyed that. 1110 00:42:01,200 --> 00:42:09,200 And I think I'm very happy that you have discovered cortisol and stress and pressure 1111 00:42:09,200 --> 00:42:10,200 in general. 1112 00:42:10,200 --> 00:42:12,200 Like I have discovered cortisol in general. 1113 00:42:12,200 --> 00:42:14,200 Did you know that word before? 1114 00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:16,200 No, I knew cortisone cream. 1115 00:42:16,200 --> 00:42:18,200 No, I know it's different. 1116 00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:19,200 I know it's different. 1117 00:42:19,200 --> 00:42:20,200 I know now. 1118 00:42:20,200 --> 00:42:21,200 I know now. 1119 00:42:21,200 --> 00:42:22,200 Good. 1120 00:42:22,200 --> 00:42:23,200 Yes. 1121 00:42:23,200 --> 00:42:24,200 The answer is no. 1122 00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:25,200 Yes. 1123 00:42:25,200 --> 00:42:26,200 So now I know. 1124 00:42:26,200 --> 00:42:27,200 Right. 1125 00:42:27,200 --> 00:42:31,200 I just want to remind you that the end of your discovery and using the right amount of 1126 00:42:31,200 --> 00:42:35,200 cortisol to have the aha moments that you got today about pressure and stress with the 1127 00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:42,200 holidays and having Carly as the sister is that diamonds are made under pressure. 1128 00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:45,200 Diamonds are also a girl's best friend. 1129 00:42:45,200 --> 00:42:51,200 That's an extra tip for all the gents out there who are like, man, I don't have that present 1130 00:42:51,200 --> 00:42:52,200 yet. 1131 00:42:52,200 --> 00:42:53,200 Oh my gosh. 1132 00:42:53,200 --> 00:42:55,200 But yes, diamonds are made out of pressure. 1133 00:42:55,200 --> 00:43:02,200 So if you are not feeling particularly sparkly or you have some flaws in the center of your 1134 00:43:02,200 --> 00:43:07,200 diamond spirited feeling, you are still a diamond. 1135 00:43:07,200 --> 00:43:08,200 That's really good. 1136 00:43:08,200 --> 00:43:11,200 Actually, you wrapped up that diamond in a little bow. 1137 00:43:11,200 --> 00:43:13,200 And you just keep unwrapping it. 1138 00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:15,200 It's pretty wonderful. 1139 00:43:15,200 --> 00:43:22,200 Remember, you are always fit to be real and always allowed to be a little extra. 1140 00:43:22,200 --> 00:43:24,200 But not in your cortisol levels. 1141 00:43:24,200 --> 00:43:31,200 Unless you're not feeling it and then you don't have to be. 1142 00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:34,200 For legal reasons, we have to tell you that this podcast is meant for entertainment and 1143 00:43:34,200 --> 00:43:36,200 educational purposes only. 1144 00:43:36,200 --> 00:43:40,200 We are not healthcare professionals for all of your health, wellness, fitness and self 1145 00:43:40,200 --> 00:43:41,200 care needs. 1146 00:43:41,200 --> 00:43:45,200 Please refer to the medical professional in your life, your primary care physician, your 1147 00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:48,200 therapist, a certified coach, whoever it may be. 1148 00:43:48,200 --> 00:43:53,200 And then let us know what they say because I guarantee we need to know what to do. 1149 00:43:53,200 --> 00:43:54,200 Okay. 1150 00:43:54,200 --> 00:44:13,200 Bye.