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Hello, my beautiful and powerful, yes you listening today right here right now.

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You are a beautiful and powerful CEO of the world.

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Welcome to the Startup Stories podcast where new female business owners are heard, held,

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and served treated like queens with five star, ten star gold star service.

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I'm bringing you relatable stories to keep you sane, grounded, and growing as you deliver

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your purpose and grow your business in the world.

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Today I am joined by Wendy Legat.

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I should have checked her name first.

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Wendy did I pronounce that properly?

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Fantastic.

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Oh good.

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I was trying to do that but I'm so fired up today.

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Like exploding.

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Just energy is wild.

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So anyway, Wendy is a retirement life coach.

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Guys, we spend so much time living in now but there's always more now.

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And if we're employees and we've been working for 10 or 12 years or even as entrepreneurs,

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it's almost more addicting.

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Wouldn't you say Wendy to get caught up in this busyness of the work because it's so

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joyful?

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But switching into kind of what I consider our earned run-threats and goal of having

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passive income so that we can enjoy life without work constrictions is such like an underlooked

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and under talked about part of our entire life.

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We usually try to create something or get through something.

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But when we get to retirement, and I've seen a lot of people obviously working public sector

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who have flopped and fallen or not really retired immediately returned to consult or

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take another job or do all kinds of things.

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So Wendy is going to share with us how she came to grow her company and what transitions

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she went through.

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She's not retired now in her own words but definitely living in a more comfortable balance

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of life.

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She's committed and accredited herself by becoming a professional certified coach and

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the founder and owner of Conflux Retirement Coaching to specialize in non-financial retirement

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life planning.

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So you're here to help our heart and help our body acclimatize to that.

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She comes from 25 years of corporate sales leadership and experience and now using everything

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that she's seen in those incredible valuable years of service to guide clients into a retirement

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transition.

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So I'll let you carry it forward from there Wendy and I'm just so excited to hear from

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you and share your wisdom and your career to entrepreneurial journey with our listeners.

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Yeah, thank you so much and it's really great and so energizing to be here.

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So I appreciate the opportunity and I think you captured so much of the essence of the

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work that I do.

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So far as this feeling of purpose and this feeling of this runway into elderhood and

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you know what we can do to make the very most of it.

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I loved when you were saying that you know we're in the work now that we love and we

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feel passionate about and that's the key is continuing on that trajectory and if you get

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to that point where you say you know what I want more or want different that's when

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we can start to say well then what does retirement mean to me and how might I define it because

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I have so many people that come to me that say oh I'm of a certain age so I should retire

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or I have to retire or they have so much pressure around them about retiring and so I always

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want us to first start and say well what is it about retirement how do you define retirement

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because yes I'm a retirement life coach but I don't advocate that everyone should be retiring.

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I just want those that choose to to go into it with awareness and intentionality and really

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make sure that it's a fulfilling chapter for them so so I wanted to kind of mention that

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but I'll go back then to your question about how did I get here.

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Okay.

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Thanks so much to Unpack already.

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Did I stop?

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Well we'll just roll with it I love it I'll write something down and you can start with

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your origin story and then we'll dive into that because you guys did you hear what she

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said and I love it and it just kind of shook this concept loose from me too as to what is

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retirement for you it's sort of like you know what are your own personal preferences how

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do you like to season your food right how do you want to season your retirement right.

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Yeah yeah but you could go into a restaurant and you can say season it for me and it may

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not be what's of interest to you and that's the key is that I really speak to a retirement

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by design not default and that we're at choice and I think that for all of your listeners

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at every life phase you know let's seize that let's let's be accountable you are saying

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you know the CEO of the world we're the CEO of ourselves especially as we move into retirement

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because it's it's it's for us and so if we don't take that leadership role and we don't

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take on that ownership of both the decisions and that accountability and then we do we

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do fall in fun bowl as you mentioned because we're not really owning it so so season it

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in the way that tastes good to you so yes okay okay well let's do your origin story and

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let's unpack more of that because there's these distinctions around even you know my

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perception of retirement which would be not going to the office every day but still doing

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things in a different time flow I guess okay yeah yeah yeah no and again it's you know

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it's for us to each define so for me as you shared my background is in sales leadership

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and so from from early on even before college I was in sales and then was kind of you get

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promoted pretty quickly when you're in like a small fashion boutique and things and so

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then from there into college I just continued on that trajectory and was doing really well

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but then got to this point where I thought you know I want something that to me feels

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more professional so I had seen peers of mine that were in outside sales so I made that big

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shift and ended up working for a fortune 50 company and again up that career ladder and

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I think I think I want to just mention right now that for me a lot of those decisions I

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did abdicate I did see oh this opportunity is being given to me now so I have to seize

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it because I have that competitive driven nature and so I just kind of kept climbing

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in that regard I stepped out of things for a bit as I raised my three children and then

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came back into the workforce and so then flash forward having worked for a lot of different

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companies loving the connection with the team members who reported to me loving the connection

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with clients and really being able to feel like I was bringing value to all and then

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also this idea of wanting to achieve you know and meet and exceed those numbers the sales

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and service numbers the last position that I was in before making this big career change

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was as a director of several franchises and love the people that I was working with we

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were so aligned with our philosophy and we were doing great things and that's probably

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was the kiss of death because we did so well that I think the owner saw this is a great

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opportunity to sell and so they did and the new owner that came in had such a totally

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different philosophy than I did his way of facing to the clients and to our team members

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was just very opposed to mine and so our values were not aligned and you know a lot of us

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are fixers and problem solvers so I tried every which way to make it work but ultimately

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it was so soul sucking that I just really had to you know I think sometimes when we're

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at that lowest point is when we look really closely and we listen and that's what happened

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for me and it was like you know I can't I can't make this better it's too much at my

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sacrifice and so I went back to really deciding okay what now do I want to go into a you know

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another sales leadership position and I thought it just didn't feel right any longer what

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felt more right to me was really bringing more of myself forward and so I started researching

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things and I came upon coaching which was new to me you know I'd work with coaches I

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guess but I thought of them as more consultants more in you know the work environment and

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so and I thought wow I can go back to school and I can become a professional certified

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coach and so I went back to school which was in and of itself such an adventure and so

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challenging but so fulfilling and determined okay I'll go back into coaching around business

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but very quickly it started to feel more trans you know transactional than transformational

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it wasn't filling my soul and so as much as they sometimes say do what you know it was

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like no what I know is that I see people like me I you know peers at their clients that are

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struggling as they're moving into retirement and I thought wow this is not this doesn't

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feel good to me this isn't how I want anybody to be moving through their life not if there's

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something that I can do about it and so then I discovered retirement life coaching and thought

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so I got several additional certifications because I didn't do anything like that existed and then

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all the books that are out there and I started to see that and learn that there's a struggle for

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a number of people the studies tell us one in three struggle in retirement and so I'll kind of stop

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there except to say that that's my passion is really helping people normalize that if they're

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struggling that's totally normal a lot of other people are going through that struggle and then

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what we can do about it and how we can be about it to move into that next chapter.

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So you immediately you had been you said you had been advocating your power throughout your career

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but then when your career started shifting the work environment changed you and like you know it's

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it's bittersweet but beautiful how you were at this really incredible climax of everything being

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synchronized and healthy and slow and fulfilling and then a big change came in and rocked it right

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but in that time instead of continuing to give in and try and make do what you did because you

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have a pure heart and you know you had people you genuinely cared about particularly having

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had such a good run with them leading up yes but then you took your power back you know yeah

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probably even before that but really took that personal responsibility then and made a very

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conscious and thought out decision it sounds like it happened over a bit of time you said you were

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trying to make do and you look after your staff and everything for a while right yes yeah and then

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then left and then weren't lost per se but you know used it as an opportunity to seek more

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and fell into coaching found that and I just want to point that out because I'm a big proponent of

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external circumstances don't dictate internal well-being right 100% but they they will create an

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environment in which we have to go inward and see what we're going to do and so I just think that's

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really beautiful and then it sounds like from there you kind of became your own avatar or niche in

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you know we were going to end up serving but you didn't know yet so you were open and curious

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found something went for it tried it out a little and then kept digging in that coaching industry

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until you came upon retirement coaching and so I didn't realize that there was a deeper level of it

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available out there and I'm not surprised but I think that's great because then it helped you

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probably even normalize moving into that specific area and you had just kind of come out of a

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comparable transition so yes start to serve people based on your personal experience right and you

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as a leader in that because you had a bit of a better sense or you know mind for strategy coming

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from sales perhaps you know as to how to lead yourself forward and so other people it's not

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because work you go and it's there for you right like you don't have to create it or anything it's

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it's like having a parent look after you even though it's a job there's that built-in structure

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expectations and famous and so yeah so you're very insightful that I am my client in so many ways

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because just like I say you know let's experiment let's put a toe in see what feels right we don't

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need to jump into things because so often people are kind of one day they're in career the next day

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they're in retirement it's so black or white and and then they contend to start right away to do the

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to-do list in the bucket list in the travel in the leisure and all of that is great until that

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honeymoon phase wears off which it generally does for most six months two years in and then people

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start to say wow what's why am I here like what feels right you know what matters at this point

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what's getting me up in the morning how can I contribute and for those that don't ask those

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questions then they can maybe get on that hamster wheel again a busyness you know and filling up

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their dance card to feel like they're relevant or falling out on the couch research tells us that

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the average retiree watch is 47 hours of tv a week a week that's more than time than you spend at work

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if you have like a 45 hour yeah replaced replaced work with or anything in between and so that's

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that's really my focus is let's go in with realistic optimism let's not be on that idealistic

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idealistic edge which is leisure travel in less weekends or the other one foot in the grave and

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about loss and aging and things let's bring it to the middle and the way that we do that is to

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heighten our awareness about this could be a struggle and then become intentional you know

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how am I feeling about this and what what is going to feel better to me or what needs more attention

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and then get into action so I do want to highlight that in the demographic that generally is retiring

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you know positive psychology was not on the scene when we were being raised and so this idea of

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feeling or giving any attention to our emotions is really foreign for a lot of people and and

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that's why I feel like I can really help give some pathways to that because rather than suppressing

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or pushing aside those emotions their signals to us they're telling us something is amiss

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and so by acknowledging them and understanding and navigating and then we can move into this place

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that does resonate more with with our desires or resonate more with who we are just like I was able

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to find that when I left that last position. So I want to hear from you based on clients that

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you've served different visions of retirement so we can start to plant that in because you know

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with my audience being newer female entrepreneurs and starting a business is like it's so delicious

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and so stimulating and I've said it a hundred times I guess I need to get because I've gone to

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Disneyland in a few weeks but it's like being a kid at Disneyland with a pocket full of candy and a

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pocket full of cash and no supervision right and you're just like ready to go running until you

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fall down and throw up so um but I really want to you know encourage women that even though we're

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having that gorgeous stimulation at the beginning it's a long game and eventually or throughout

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we want to allow more room for life like that's my big um motivation for supplementing income

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through an online business is to have more time freedom my job has reigned over how much money

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I earn how much time off I get how much sick time I have when I can go on vacation what my working

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hours are right all of these structures around it and having an online business is to create some

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freedom in that and then spread it out over like 30 years of life right or not to do not to replace

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my job with another job where I'm making my own money right but to create something above that

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that's purpose that's spaciousness that's meaningful and yeah of course that brings in money when we

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retire we get a passive income hopefully in some cases right it's a little different Canada versus

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the States I guess um but then what I think opens up is all this space and time to exist

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and all of these distractions aren't there anymore to kind of fill the silence right of of who we are

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and like you were saying what now and what's next and when you described the first six to

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24 months of retirement I was like oh that sounds like spring break right like grandma and grandpa are

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going on spring break for a couple years yeah yeah but it's like you're right it's not a sustainable so

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how do you spread that out and and be more than just those things right yeah I mean what's really

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coming up for me as you're sharing that Nia and the entrepreneur's journey is it's there's some

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parallels between that and the retirees journey because this idea that if we do look at this time

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abundance or we look at you know really making them having so much in front of us we can fritter

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away what's what presently is is provided to us and so I think that that's an important thing

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at any age or life stage is being present and really saying making those decisions

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taking that charge and so as an entrepreneur and thinking wow you know kid in a candy store

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there's that abundance so let's just give ourselves some space and grace let's slow down so that we

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can speed up and really savor those decisions and make mindful decisions very similar as we move

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into retirement and so what I'd like to offer up is no matter what age your listeners are at or what

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they're looking at for their future is to use this as that runway because if we put some of these

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practices and beliefs and habits in place now they'll serve us well into elderhood and I think

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that's what I the disconnect that I see so often is that people have been on that autopilot or on

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that hamster wheel or just so so busy and so then I have clients that say wow now that works behind me

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you know I don't really have those social connections because I wasn't nurturing those relationships

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and what I always invite is well if you got a call from someone from your past and they said wow

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you know it's been a long time but I'd love to reconnect would you hang up on them no you would

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more than likely I don't know the circumstances but mostly you would welcome it right and so

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so it's a matter of putting that toe in it's a matter of maybe being a little vulnerable it's

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a matter of experimenting and so so I think that that's so vitally important you asked some of the

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things that people come to me with and I mentioned early on this idea of struggle and a lot of the

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clients that come to me are in that place of struggle and they feel I think a sense of shame

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almost or a sense that they can own it up you own up to it to anybody else because if you think

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about it if you say to somebody house retirement what are they going to say it's great yeah I'm

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at Disneyland all the time yeah um and so if they say well I'm struggling with more than likely say

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what are you what are you talking about you're not working you know you leave your travel all that

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and so so there's a sense of wow there's something wrong with me then I must have missed the invitation

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to that party um but the reality is so many people do struggle so the people that come to me

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oftentimes are saying things like I feel lost in the desert I feel a huge loss um especially people

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in the helping industry such as teaching and and nursing and things like that you know they are so

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connected on a deeper level not to say that all of us aren't but but especially there that a real

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loss um or gosh I feel like I'm going to fail in retirement so coming with all of these preconceived

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notions or expectations around us or or I've had people come that are so busy and then when we start

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to deconstruct it's like they're feeling like they have to continue to earn the badge of relevance

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or feel like they they again matter but based on things that don't matter so much to them so those

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are some of the things um I is that kind of addressing the thought that had come to your mind

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in it's such an important conversation because it it shows how we can build our life in like

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individual chapters or blocks right okay right now I'm raising kids okay right now I'm working

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okay right now I'm retired but what you're talking about and and it's it's gonna heal and already is

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so many people especially because I still work in government local government and we're not

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prepared for retirement work doesn't you know give you a six month transition or emotional support

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or counseling and programs like what you're doing I think really belong in corporate for

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that that last year so that you're ahead of it and you're supporting your employer employee

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in leaving but listening to you is very reminding of we want to blend our life together to kind of

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have these smooth um evolutions right not these jarring like um hot cold contrasts right yeah I'm

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42 I know I'm gonna retire one day right like it's inevitable the majority will do yes right we know

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that's coming it's always sort of then and then oh we think we're looking forward to it and I have

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observed people in the last year or so of retirement um being very excited and starting to really let

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go and kind of not care sort of that I won the lottery you know go-pound sand attitude then at

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work a woman just retired and um I had to kind I lovingly and jokingly was like it is four o'clock

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beat it and now it's 427 we finish up 430 I'm like would you get out already right you know

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it's not gonna matter and but her heart's just so in it she wanted to to be a part of that but

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thinking about these things and the the jarring shift when you haven't been getting set up for

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it is a huge missing link huge right and then like people will become codependent on something

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like a grandchild or or the the adult child and their family and that is now the entire focus and

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just completely lose sense of self because like you say the structure is gone the social network

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is very different or maybe you're kind of done with your work people as lovely as they were um and

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I just love the idea of normalizing that that stage of life and again as you connected the

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dots with the early stages of building something basically our whole lives were pursuing meaning

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and pursuing greater self-awareness right and fulfillment so um layering that in throughout

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our journeys can ease those changes and I'd love to hear like what was it like for you from what I

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heard in your origin story work changed I finally decided to quit I jumped or I found life coaching

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and went back to school and so how did you feel really leaving corporate after 25 years and doing

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a total shift and what did you learn about yourself now in your own personal story that helps you

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relate to the clients that you're working with yeah it's such a such a great question thank you I

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want to circle back to a couple things you mentioned um I want to touch upon really quickly this

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concept of off-boarding because I you're absolutely right you know there's so much that's done around

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on-boarding and yet corporations would do well and serve their communities and themselves and

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their employees well to assist them into this next chapter and I think that there's more and more

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of a spotlight around that but it's definitely not something that is is very commonly seen so

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that's one thing another I'd like to highlight is this concept of balance and I think the more

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throughout our lives that we can keep that balance like I was mentioning clients who say gosh I haven't

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been in touch with people for so long let's pepper in those little pieces throughout at every again

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age or life stage and let's make sure that if it's our faith or if it's our community or if it's

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activities or if it's a significant other you know that we're that we're balancing that because I kind

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of always hold up a circle and say if our lives are 24 hours and that's the whole and if we're

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working eight or 10 or 12 or more hours and then oh yeah we're supposed to sleep it doesn't leave

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much time but yet if we just build in those little little steps just the smallest step you know making

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a plan to contact somebody once a week having dinner with somebody once a month um that's around

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social connections getting to the gym you know so many people say when I retire I'll get healthy

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and yet we want to just continuously have these sampling blocks the last thing that I'd like to

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speak to and then I'd love to talk about my transition is transitions um and that was a concept

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that I was new to me when I started coaching and I that's what I did my research project on was

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transitions because I didn't realize that there's a big difference between the external change like

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me for example with leaving corporate and going into coaching and the internal transition that

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that really happens deep within us and and how things are impacting us. William Bridges did a lot

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of work around this prolific around transitions and I love his model which is that we start with

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the ending we start with that closure we start with okay what what do we want to bring with us

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and what do we want to leave behind and what do we need to put a period or an exclamation mark on

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and that's why sometimes rituals like a retirement party for example or for any of you leaving from

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one career to another um is so important or sending kids off to college you know we're changing our

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roles but we're not changing who we are that our sense of identity that true essence of who we've

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always been and always will be is there but sometimes life just buries it or we allow it to

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be buried and so so I want to bring that up too because I think so often people jump right into

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the what right into the doing right into all the activities when they make a transition and that's

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really that external change but it's not allowing for us to have closure and and really clarity about

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what's going to serve us best as we move forward and what we need to have an ending to so just to

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finish up on Bridges model so we start with the ending and then we go into what he calls the neutral

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zone and maybe productivity drops off if we give it the time in the space in the grace to reflect

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on what's most important to us and that can be that time when we're in conflict or we feel stuck

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or we feel unsure or we feel denial about the changes we made or angry and we need to sit in

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that place and explore it and really determine you know what's coming up for me and what's

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what questions do I need to answer for myself before we then go into that third piece of the

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model which is that new beginning and that then can become the what but we start with that why

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and we start with what's meaningful to us and doing that um for me I think that if I'm going to be

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totally honest when I made that change from corporate I don't know that I was in tune with

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with all of the things that I'm sharing with you as I am now um because again I was raised in that

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era where you know you push through emotions you're you know no pain no gain productivity hard

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driving get things done and if these things come up you push them down unless they just you know

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explode um so so I think this idea of really keeping that balance and mindfulness about

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what's coming up for us is just vitally important I was very fortunate through my coaching to also

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have the opportunity to get involved in a program called positive intelligence and I don't know if

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some of your listeners have heard of it but is this idea of not just physical fitness but mental

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fitness and how we can take that survivor brain that we have that skews to the negative it just does

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and but through science we're learning now there is neuroplasticity the more that we infuse positivity

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in our life not in a toxic way but more in a way of what's coming up for me that's a negative emotion

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how can I shift it um then we get on this trajectory of looking at life looking at the gifts looking at

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the possibilities um and so I was very fortunate to also become credentialed in that as well and that

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works very beautifully hand in hand with the work that I do so that was a lot to answer your question

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but did it you know kind of yes no yeah it's so profound and you know you speak in a very calm

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and grounded place too and it's it's lovely to listen to you draw it out what I'm hearing is

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you know habits in shaping our day to day that are aligned with our values and that are true for us

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this is the stuff that like you said happens from inception to last breath it's our it's like our

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heart DNA essentially right if I have to put a label on it um and in in life we again go through

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these different stages and as adults we just sort of make may end up cataloging these different stages

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right so when you're a kid it's fun la la la toys no responsibility school la la la fun maybe a bit

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more responsibility real world you kind of play for a bit and then into the career and there we

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we kind of become a bit generic potentially and I want to speak very generally because

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the underlying element pulling out from what you were sharing Wendy is there's the doing

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and there's the being and the doing can tend to take over as we age because creativity

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curiosity you know like if you look at your standard average adult to a beautiful four to seven

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year old you're going to see some personality differences and that's what I want to really

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be clear that I'm talking about right yes is the being and the doing and retirement is a a jarring

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life of van tat times because we've been in the doing yes for so long yeah and we've got we have

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that's on the back we're doing it right we get the sense of accomplishment we get you know we have

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connection we have relevance um yeah but there's parallels there also with you know your listeners

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who are entrepreneurs or listeners that are deep into their careers and not looking at retirement

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yet there can be that same that same busyness factor that same doing and I love that saying that

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we're human beings and that's just such an important reminder you know that that we know that when we

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build off of the feelings that are deep within us we do have more clarity more commitment more

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conviction more confidence but if we don't allow for that then we can just be in this autopilot

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or we can start to abdicate some of those choices to others and that's not a place that I want any

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of us to be in and I know you don't as well and a harder um truth to face as we become more vulnerable

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in older age right you can tend to then just further and further constrict is like your last

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few chapters on earth right so taking that um reverse engineer model right to your last breath

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what are you going to take with you in that moment and allowing that to play back all the way to

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right now you guys and think about the long long game not all at once but with an awareness and a

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connection to the being that you want to be as you be from here on forward no yeah I mean that's

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one of the exercises I do with clients is that wiser elder self that legacy of wisdom you know and

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then but we're not going to be just looking at leaving things behind we want to live it now

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you know and so being mindful then and taking that time to reflect and taking that time to dig

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deep so it is work um and that's the thing that I think a lot of people don't want to open up that

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door but gosh once you open up that door then you're really entering into that room that's filled

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with the things that that you love you know the things that are meaningful to you and so um so I

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really do I really want that for everyone but it's not for everyone I understand that you know

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digging deeper looking a little closer um but I'm going to think that your listeners are not of that

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elk and that they really are on this path of self-discovery and and honesty and authenticity

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in what's meaningful and then finding the pathways to it so share with us Wendy then

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some different visions that your clients have had over retirement and even some of the

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transformations that you've seen from um their Pinterest board you know should retirement

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to their soulful spirit led fulfilled retirement yeah I mean that's such a that's such a deep and

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important question um and I think that what I want to first say is that you know these are

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works in progress we're all works in progress so it's not a matter that we finally achieved the

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goal it is I I I always like to think it's a different word than journey but that's what comes

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to mind is you know that we're just we're allowing for that and we're we're entering it in with this

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idea of possibility and positivity and and pivoting where needed um you brought up before this idea

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that sometimes we can kind of our world can become much more narrow and we can start to

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constrict and so this is what I want for everyone is to stay really open and I think that's the beauty

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um that I've seen in all of my clients is this opportunity to you know yes they have this bucket

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list or yes they have this to-do list and they start to look at it very differently and they

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can start to build it to don't list or they can get rid of the list or they prioritize you know

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they see what is most meaningful because like you said at the end of your day is looking back

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you know what will you have valued the most well if we're caught up with all of this checking things

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off which oftentimes is a mindset from work then we're not going to be fully stepping into you

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know what's what's possible or what's more importantly what's meaningful to us so for one of my clients

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she loves music and so for her she had always thought about writing a song for her children

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and so that's something that she was really able to allow for that vulnerability and that creativity

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to come to the surface that had been really kind of submerged in her corporate work. For another

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client who was in the teaching profession just really being able to see that no I'm not going to

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now go back to working in a different way I'm going to instead give a myself a mentor and help raise

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somebody's situation up and so she chose to go and become a volunteer in the prisons and that became

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very very heart-centered and important for her and so those are a couple examples I have so very many

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but I think I think just opening the door I think people just feeling this weight that's

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lifted because yes it's so anticipatory but it's also like oh no you know what am I

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don't think so yes and so then it's known yeah yeah and even for one who came back and said you

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know I look at my vacation so differently now I really immerse myself in the experience I really

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step into it seeing the gift in it and seeing that this is such an opportunity as opposed to

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you know checking okay so I went here and I went there so just being more present

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being more present and being in your life living that life treating everything as those

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precious moments so that's what I would say is that's the universal that I see in clients

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so the retirement is the external factor that's holding you to an internal expansion

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if you're willing to go there right yes and one that it's kind of funny because it's almost so

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obvious right like you know it's coming you know it's going to be different but it's somehow still

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so unknown for you and you've painted just a beautiful picture of how people really made it for

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what was right for them yes you know and so if somebody's finding a part-time job that's right

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for them you get a social element you get a little bit of money you get to have fun get out maintain

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some semblance of structure like there's so many different ways of doing it but the the thread behind

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it all is their sense of self and their sense of really allowing for something that they haven't

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made time or space for yet right particularly when you talked about the person going on vacation

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I was feeling like you know when you work nine five Monday and Friday 52 weeks a year

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going on vacation is like oh yeah you get to be a kid again but when you don't have to go back to

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work you're not escaping from anything you're really enjoying life for what it is and if we pull that

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elements into now it will change our life and we start to reverse engineer then from that

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transition of retirement to this present moment where we are building our business work in corporate

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whether you know just being on a self-development journey and really living from a deeper place

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and sense of self and making space for things you mentioned one person didn't have like creative

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bandwidth at their job and now can release that and so we don't have to wait for that to happen

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either right yeah yeah no I think I think that's so true and I think this idea of reframing you

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know that looking at life from a spot of abundance rather than scarcity and looking at it from

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opportunity rather than obstacle and and the concept that were the motivation you know what's

403
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what's the motivation are we drawn to something or are we trying to move away from something and

404
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so we have all of these at our fingertips throughout our lives but if it's a muscle that we're not

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used to or it's an opportunity that we haven't even we don't even know it's at our feet then we

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can step over it and so it's just so important that we are aware and that we are intentional

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and that then we get into action so that we don't just have these hopes wishes and dreams

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this fantastic retirement but we don't have a runway to it and more importantly when we

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plan for it or step into it that we do plan for it and we fully step into it yeah and I think just

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you doing this work and showing up is going to help blend together these transitions right so

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we've already linked this sort of startup new entrepreneur to career retirement and we've we've

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shown the parallels between them and created a thread now for that continuity and as retirement

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coaching grows and gets into corporate and other places and provides that support for especially

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current generation where it just wasn't part of the culture part of the family conversation part of

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any of that is very healing and meaningful and will create a legacy and of its own you know for

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future generations to to live um you know like a bit more holy all the way along or rather than

417
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waiting for different stages for that to come out yeah yeah and so that it's not like we're

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always looking for oh gosh I get to retire in 30 years I get to retire in 20 years you know when

419
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I retire I will yes yes because then we're just like counting away the same and stuff and and

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instead of being in that present moment um and I love how you're mentioning this thread through

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our lives because it is this idea that yes it's a new chapter but it's not a whole new book you

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know sometimes people say oh I'm starting over and it's no you bring so many strengths capabilities

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passions with you into every chapter in your life at the same time let's be mindful of the things

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that don't serve us well and and I think that's where when I made my change I was able to start to

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um recognize some of those patterns and habits that were working against me and let go of them and

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and yet again if we're not present and mindful about that we carry all that weight with us

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and it weighs us down it doesn't allow us to be our best selves. Wendy what would current you

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say to the five year ago you about this journey what would you go back and tell yourself?

429
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Just to allow the difficult emotions you know just don't try to push them away but really

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really recognize that there are signals to something that there's something that needs

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more attention and that I don't to prove my worth I don't have to power through I don't have to be

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this hyper achiever I don't have to um you know drive past all these things if I sit in that place

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for a little bit and I allow myself to get more in tune to what's important to me and authentic

434
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to me and true to me it's going to be the springboard into a much better place and so that's

435
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that's what I would say because that's what's happened for me so don't hurry through it sit

436
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and hold yourself comfort yourself yes yeah and if you know for some if you're so foreign and I get

437
00:45:50,560 --> 00:45:57,520
that um but then let's think of okay why is it foreign and I think oftentimes it's just because

438
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it's just not something that we're used to but we can wrap ourselves in a blanket of discomfort

439
00:46:03,920 --> 00:46:09,920
and stay in that place and so instead let's shed it and get a little uncomfortable because we know

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that when we're uncomfortable generally we're growing and so yes if we start to sit with those

441
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emotions and they feel uncomfortable that that's a signal that okay there's growth that's happening

442
00:46:21,040 --> 00:46:26,160
here there's something good around the corner freedom freedom in there what do you think future

443
00:46:26,160 --> 00:46:36,880
you will say to current you present you now good on you yeah you know I mentioned earlier that work

444
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in progress so yes I I continuously each day I want to bring my best self forward and each day

445
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you know did I fall short or whatever it's such great learning for me um and so I think that

446
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I'm just on this trajectory and I think my future self will feel like okay you've you've just continued

447
00:46:55,120 --> 00:47:02,640
to to hone hone Wendy along the way good job keep going good job how are you doing great right

448
00:47:02,640 --> 00:47:11,200
the cheerleader I'm waiting for you at the finish line yeah Oracle finish line yeah Wendy where can

449
00:47:11,200 --> 00:47:16,000
we come find you where can we work with you where's the best place to hang out and continue to learn

450
00:47:16,000 --> 00:47:20,800
and grow with you oh yeah I appreciate that opportunity so as you mentioned the name of my

451
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company is Conflux Retirement Coaching and that's c-o-n-f-l-u-x so you can find me at my website

452
00:47:27,840 --> 00:47:34,560
confluxretirementcoaching.com or wendy at confluxretirementcoaching.com I'm also on LinkedIn

453
00:47:34,560 --> 00:47:41,920
Wendy Leggett and and just drop me a note I offer you know a session if that's helpful because I

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like people to be able to really voice and normalize the obstacles or opportunities they're seeing

455
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and so I would really welcome that opportunity to connect with anyone. Beautiful okay and we'll

456
00:47:53,120 --> 00:47:58,240
put all that in the show notes no worries and help get you around wonderful well thank you Wendy

457
00:47:58,240 --> 00:48:03,600
this was just a beautiful beautiful conversation I really enjoyed it oh and I did as well I mean

458
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your heart and your and your spirit and and just your knowledge of things is just so enriching so

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I appreciate it bye