Hello, hello, this is Sabrina Amina with the Feelings Pod.
I'm a holistic health coach and an educator and I like to talk about feelings and mindfulness.
So what we do in this podcast is I share some reflections about the emotions that are most
alive and present for me and talk a little bit about how I journey through those emotions
and do my very best to listen for the lessons of and the wisdom of our emotional lives.
So yeah, thank you for joining me. If you're new to the podcast, welcome.
And if you're... if you've listened before, thank you so much.
If you know somebody who might enjoy this transmission, I invite you to share it with them.
And the nice thing about this podcast is like you... there's no really kind of order.
You can just kind of listen to... look at the... look at each episode and decide, oh yeah, this is something that I'm feeling out in the moment.
And you know, check out the episode and see if it resonates or at the very least makes you feel a little bit less alone
in the emotions that you're trying to navigate.
With that, today's episode is on love, longing and loneliness.
So loneliness has been... over the past week has been very loud for me this week.
I transitioned from teaching full-time every day, five days a week, seeing 175 teenagers every weekday.
And now in the summer months, I have a rest and space and I'm not interacting with so many humans every day.
It's five days a week.
And so when I step back, it almost makes sense that I'm feeling a little lonely because my nervous system, although it's like highly activated in that environment,
I'm noticing that I've really been needing some alone time and alone time has historically been challenging for me because I am a social butterfly.
I love being around people, I feel lit up, my moon and rising sign are both in Leo, so I just love attention and care and I love to be seen.
So being alone is a place that brings up challenge for me, it also brings up longing, it brings up this longing for connection, this longing to be loved and embraced and held and celebrated.
And I've been working a lot on learning how to hold myself and love myself and this is like lifelong learning.
It's the work I believe I am on this earth to do, I'd even argue that all of us are on this earth to understand love and embody love and understand love more deeply and more fully.
So when I notice feelings of unworthiness or lack or the illusion of like, it almost sounds absurd to me to say it out loud, of being unloved, like it is impossible to be unloved.
But when we're in a state of feeling unloved, it's a state of forgetting, it's a state of like really being human.
Humans are really like, the human experience is very like, forgetful and I daresay innocent even.
And when we're in a state of forgetfulness, we lose touch with that awareness of the abundance of love that is always available to us.
And lately, over the past few years, learning about somatic practices that ground me and my human experience in my physical body, in my bones, in my skin has been a really helpful way to remind me of that love.
And what I mean by that is, if I'd like to be held, I can always be held by Mother Earth.
I can just like lie down in the grass or in the sun, in the sand and just like feel my feet on the ground and just like really like, mm, luxuriate in that sensation of being held and supported and grounded by the Earth.
Hmmmmmmmmmmm.
Yeah.
In my moments of loneliness and longing, I really just let myself feel those things and it's not the most fun feeling, it's not the most energizing feeling, but I think it's part of the pendulum swing of being human.
It's like, and finding balance is like, instead of having like this pendulum that erratically swings left to right, left to right, it's like just like allowing for the swing.
Let's take a breath.
Close the eyes.
Take a deep breath in.
And exhale.
Hmmmmmm.
Let's do that twice more.
Take a deep breath in.
Let it go.
And one last time.
Take a deep breath in.
And let it go.
And exhale.
Just feel yourself settle wherever you are.
Notice what emotions are present and alive for you.
Where do they live in your body?
Take a deep breath in to the space where you feel the most activation.
Maybe it's your belly, maybe it's your throat, maybe it's your heart space, maybe it's your knees, maybe it's your toes.
Breathe into the space that really needs it in this moment.
And let it go.
A big full deep breath is loving nourishment for your body.
Remembering the abundance of air that's around us is a gift that holds us and revives us.
It is literally life giving.
And how is it that we so easily forget our connection to our life force?
We get caught up in our thoughts and our stories and our conflicts and our worries.
And there are just so many rich gifts right here.
Even the gift of being able to observe the comedy that is the human condition.
The comedy, the tragedy, the magic, the euphoria, the wisdom, the rage, the shadow.
This life is so rich.
And I love being able to sit down and record my voice to remind myself loneliness is an illusion.
I'm surrounded by these funny creatures.
My daughters stuffed animals.
They all have personalities of their own and it's just...
I've got this pink dragon and this brown bear with blue overalls and hearts and a red bow around his neck.
He's very sweet.
It's just...
I've got this lovely white unicorn with pink braids and a big round belly.
This one is just nice to hug to my belly.
And this soft gray elephant with pink ears and the pink bow tie.
Ribbon wrapped around his neck.
It's like noticing the things you can perceive with your five senses in this human body.
The textures, the colors.
Sometimes my daughter will ask me, aren't you bored?
And boredom is something I experience less and less of.
Boredom is just like, I think a sensation of being disconnected.
And usually if I'm bored, I'm probably scrolling on my phone.
It's a pretty good indication that I'm bored or disconnected or disassociating.
So connecting back to what's here, what do I feel in my body?
What do I feel in my fingertips?
What are the textures and smells and tastes?
And then for a few moments, I feel full again.
And then I go about my day and I forget again.
And then I remember my tools and I'm fulfilled and full again.
And the pendulum swings in this way.
And with our breath, with our bodies, with our awareness, with like loving mindful attention,
we can swing with the pendulum in a less erratic way, in a way that helps us feel more grounded and more settled
and more safe in our bodies and more trusting in ourselves even in the most turbulent moments.
So I'm sending you so much love and a reminder to
offer yourself loving breaths and loving hugs.
A friend of mine told me,
she shared some wisdom and said,
you have to remember to surround yourself with the people whose eyes light up when you're around them.
Who are those people in your life?
And if you can't necessarily think of the people whose eyes light up,
when do your eyes light up?
And doesn't necessarily have to be with another person?
What are the things you do that light you up?
Bring you the sense of aliveness and make you forget your loneliness.
Thank you so much for practicing with me today. Thank you so much for remembering with me today.
I'm sending you so much love and blessings and care.