Hello hello, this is Sabrina Amina and I'm the host of the Feelings Pod.
Today's episode is on courage and confidence and how to cultivate greater confidence.
So I've been reflecting this week on where does confidence come from and where does courage
come from and I invite you to ask yourself this week or I invite you to just get curious
about the stories that you tell about yourself.
So the stories that we tell about ourselves, these stories that build our identity are
sometimes we grow very attached to these stories and I hear it all the time.
I hear people say things like, oh I don't have the confidence to do that.
I don't have the confidence to apply for that job or wear that dress and those may not be
the exact words but it's something to that effect.
So I think first of all one of the really important ways to build confidence is to be
more in action, to move away from like incessant thinking, thinking about the thing that you
want to do, find a way to take action if there's something that you want to do.
I've been noticing a lot of conversations this week about folks who talk about, oh I
would love to do this thing, you know, passion projects or hobbies or just things that light
you up.
That, you know, we make excuses like, oh I just don't have time or oh I, you know, I'm
too old or you know, whatever the excuse is, whatever the story is.
We can do these things in small ways.
You don't have to tackle the whole project.
And this is true for myself as well.
Ever since I was little I've been in awe of surfing and there's just something about
riding waves that I find really enchanting and so that's my challenge is this summer
is to move in the direction of having some kind of surfing experience.
So I'm not necessarily going to become a pro surfer overnight but you know, like maybe
I'll find a class or you know, maybe if taking a class or having a surf lesson, excuse me,
if having a surf lesson feels out of reach or feels like a big step then even just like
compiling images or looking at videos of surfers or how-to videos on YouTube, those are small
actions in that direction.
What are you surrounding yourself with?
What are you immersing yourself in?
And if there's something like that you feel like is taking up a majority of your time,
often the excuses like work or kids, like those are simply the stories we tell ourselves
that keep us in the loop of our perpetual patterns, right?
So it's important that we bring our attention to the little things that we do day in and
day out and see where can we create some wiggle room to take action on those things that seem
a little too far out of reach.
And I'd argue that maybe one of the ingredients for that is building our confidence and how
do we build our confidence?
It's not by waiting for some magical confidence fairy to come and tap us on the head with
her magical fairy wand and give us some confidence.
Confidence really comes from taking action.
Confidence comes from tuning in to the moments where you're fearful, really having a mindful
awareness around where fear comes up in your life.
And maybe it's not like active terror.
When I say fear, fear shows up in a lot of ways.
And sometimes fear is masked by disdain.
Sometimes fear is masked by jealousy.
You'll see somebody doing the thing that deep, deep, deep, deep down you've always wanted
to do and you'll just kind of scoff or perhaps put down something or someone else that's
doing it.
So take some kind of small action.
Move towards the thing that feels like, oh, I can't do this thing.
And then also, this is something that comes up for me often is applying for things, applying
for a job, applying for like an art show or asking for something, making a vulnerable
ask.
These are all things that take courage because why?
Because when we move towards the thing that we want, there's always this fear that it's
not available to me or I'll fail or someone will say no or I won't get it.
And you know what?
It takes courage to face the possibility of someone saying no.
It takes courage for you to recognize, oh, I have some fears about this.
I have some insecurities around this.
I have some doubts about myself here, but I'm going to do it anyway.
Cultivating courage is not about like inherently being a really brave, courageous person.
Cultivating courage is noticing where is fear alive in me?
When does that come up for me?
When I bring enough awareness to my fears to turn towards them courageously.
Courage doesn't exist.
Courage only exists in the face of challenge and in the face of the things that activate
our fears.
And the more we put ourselves into a practice of turning towards our fear, rather than I
really don't like the word fear less, I prefer fear facing because none of us are fearless.
The fearlessness is if there were no fears, then there's really no courage, right?
Challenge is the act of facing fear, overcoming a challenge, or at least attempting to.
And then knowing, having this trust, having this trust in yourself that you can face whatever
the outcome.
But a lot of times, because of our fears, because we think we don't have the courage
or we think we don't have what it takes or we think we're not good enough or smart enough
or talented enough, we're afraid to get confirmation of our fears, of our self-doubts.
What if I have this deep dark fear that I'm not good enough?
And then I take the risk and then it doesn't work out.
And then it just confirmation that I'm not good enough.
Well, no, it's confirmation that you are courageous enough to take that step.
It's confirmation that you're building your fear-facing muscles.
So again, I invite you to notice where the fear comes up in your life, even if it's just
a short experiment just for this week.
Get curious about what are the things that deep down, like you really want, but you kind
of shut down those desires because something in you tells you that's not realistic.
I can't do that.
Experiment with that experiment with somehow disrupting the patterns of your day-to-day
life that keep you in a loop and keep you in this place of fear.
The thing about fear is it has the most control over us when we're not even willing to acknowledge
it.
So when we shed light on those fears, we're facing it, right?
We have more power to take those courageous steps.
And with each courageous step we take, we build up our confidence just bit by bit.
So let's get into our practice today.
I invite you to find a comfortable seat and upright position in a chair on a cushion with
your spine upright, your shoulders relaxed on the back.
And if it feels good for you to close your eyes, go ahead and close the eyes and start
to tune into the breath.
We'll call this our breath of courage, our brave breaths.
And we'll take a deep breath in.
And I invite you to use a movement with your two hands.
What we're going to do is we're going to physically have our palms facing up.
And we're going to elevate your palms all the way up to the crown of your head.
When you get to the crown of the head, pause, flip your palms so they're facing down and
then slowly bring the palms back down to the belly button.
So with this movement, we're going to repeat it with the inhale.
You'll lift the palms up towards the head and then exhale, flip the palms down and bring
the breath back down towards the belly.
Inhale, bring the palms up.
Pause here, flip the palms and exhale.
And as you raise the palms with your inhale, up the breath, up the spine, pause at the
top and exhale.
And with your movement, we're imagining our breath just cultivating the sense of courage
in us.
Take a deep breath in.
Pause at the top and exhale.
Bring the palms down.
Pause and inhale.
Bring the palms up.
Pause, flip your palms down and exhale.
And one last inhale from the belly all the way up to the crown, flip the palms and bring
the breath back down, down, down to the belly and let your hands rest in your lap.
Take a deep breath in.
Let it go.
And setting the intention to cultivate a bit more courage into your life this week, even
if it's in just small ways.
Take a deep breath in and let it go.
Observing where fear comes up.
Just noting where it lives in the body and remembering to use the breath to transmute
those fears.
Take a deep breath into the belly and let it out with a sigh.
One more deep breath into the belly and exhale.
I invite you to rub the hands together, create a little bit of friction between your palms,
and when you feel some warmth, gently bring your palms to rest right at the belly button.
Or just above the belly button.
This is where your solar plexus chakra lives.
This is the energetic center of our personal power, of our courage.
And with your palms here, just breathe in.
Use your courageous breath filling this part of your belly.
Exhale.
Breathe in that courage.
As you exhale, letting the free, freeing any fear that might live here, anything that might
be holding you back, we can loosen it with the breath.
Take a deep breath in and let it go.
Now as we come to a close, I want you to imagine this bright, brilliant yellow light shining
from the solar plexus, illuminating this energy center.
And as you breathe in, that light expands.
Exhale.
Take a deep breath in.
And pause and imagine the light expanding.
And as you exhale, letting go any fear that might be lingering.
And I invite you to sit here and continue to follow the breath with your hands gently
resting on your belly.
And feel free to continue this breathing practice for as long as it feels good for you.
Remember you can always come back to this practice whenever you're feeling a need to
cultivate some courage in your life.
Thank you so much for practicing with me.
I'm Sabrina Amina and this is the feelings pod.
Have a wonderful day.