Hello, hello. This is the first episode of the summer season of The Feelings Pod, and
you might be wondering, oh what feeling are we going to talk about today? Actually you're
probably not wondering because the title of the episode is on sadness, but what you may
be wondering is like, ah, Sabrina, why? Why sadness? It's summertime. Why did you go
to sadness? Because you know what? You know why. There's a lot of power in being with
sadness, and yes, summer is joyful and light and fun and sexy, but also sadness comes up
in summer and that's okay. The key is to be able to be with all of it because the more
deeply we can be with our sadness, the more exuberant we can be in our joy, the more
willing we are to hold all of the emotions, the more deeply we can experience everything
in the emotional landscape, and you might be like, oh I'm not sure I want to experience
deep sadness, but there are deep lessons in the deep sadness, and the great thing about
emotions is they will never cause you any harm. You can feel the most difficult, the
most heavy feelings, but they won't kill you as long as you're able to give them space
because the more you try to fight these feelings, the more you try to pathologize them, the
more you try to push away feelings of sadness or anger or depression, the more it wants
to be felt and seen, the more it will pull you down, the more it will sink you, and that's
when feelings become dangerous, when they go unseen and unaddressed and unheard. So this
week a bit of sadness came up for me and that's what I want to talk about, even though it's
the summer season and that's okay. Just because it's summer doesn't mean we're not experiencing
the hard feelings, and I really notice that when I let the sadness kind of be here, when
I let it wash over me, I just feel lighter. When I notice the sadness is here, I remind
myself, you know what, it's okay that I'm feeling this way. Everybody feels this way
sometimes, it's only temporary. I get curious, hmm, what is this sadness trying to tell me?
And I also try to tune in to the wisdom of the body because emotions live in the body
and I try to track where is the sadness manifesting itself in my body. And I breathe into that
space, maybe I put my hand over that space gently. For me sadness feels like it's in
the heart space, so I'll put my hand over my heart and maybe offer myself some supportive,
loving touch. And I'll have a nice cry if it's accessible. There's nothing like a good
cry when you're sad. Let yourself cry, let it out. It's like if you have ever interacted
with a child who's in some kind of emotional turmoil, the worst thing you could do is try
to dominate the situation by getting the child to stop. That's the thing that causes harm.
If we're able to kind of see a child, see that they're in some emotional turmoil and
create a safe container for this child to like feel whatever feelings are moving through
them, they're able to find safety in themselves more quickly and also move through the big
emotions with more ease. If we're not shaming or punishing or trying to manipulate a child
out of the thing that they're feeling, that's a pretty great gift. Emotions don't really
make sense all the time and sometimes it's not cognitive work when big emotions come
through. It's not necessarily about trying to figure out the meaning. What does this
mean? We're so obsessed with intellectualizing everything. Just feel it out. Just let it be
whatever it is without having to explain it. Instead of explaining, explore. The body
and mindfulness is a very accessible place to start because you just notice sensation.
It's really just about noticing and cultivating awareness and curiosity. Just like, oh, this
sadness feels a bit swirly in my heart space. It's neutral. Sadness is not good or bad.
It's one of the many phenomena of this rich human experience. So my invitation for you
this week is if you notice sadness coming up, give yourself some loving, compassionate space
to be with the sadness. It is easier said than done. I just want to acknowledge that.
I've been working on this for years in many different ways with talk therapy and somatic
therapy and mindfulness and movement and connection, community. There are so many ways
to alchemyze emotion, to move through emotion, to observe emotion. It's one of my biggest
passions in this life is to explore feelings because there's such great wisdom in the feelings
and the emotions that move through the body. So when we keep ourselves busy, when we keep
ourselves distracted, when we shut ourselves down, when we run away from the emotions,
we move further and further away from ourselves and we become lost. Being with emotions, being
with any emotion that comes through us is a means of coming home to ourselves. And believe
it or not, something I've learned is we don't just tend to run away from the hard emotions,
we don't just run away from sadness and like big difficult emotions. We also tend to run
away from big intense exuberant joyful emotions because sometimes that's scary. Sometimes the
joyful, happier feelings, the excitement, sometimes those feelings bring about fear because it's
like, oh, I am so happy about this thing but I don't want to be too happy about it because
what if it goes away or what if I lose it or oh my God, I'm feeling this amazing feeling
and then all of a sudden, boom, you're in the space of fear because you're like, this
feels so good and I don't ever want it to go away. Oh my God, this thing is going to
go away. Oh my God, how do I make it stay? And the nature of our emotions is that none
of them stay for long and that's wonderful. That's a gift. We're always in flow. Things
are always moving and our work is really to learn how to move with it, how to be in flow
with the emotions that are up and down and left and right and front and back. It's a
dance really. So my invitation to you this week is to learn to dance, expand your dancing
skills, be with your emotions, all of the emotions, learn how to name them. Maybe you
don't even need to name them. Maybe if you don't necessarily have a name for a specific
emotion, you can be like, oh, I'm feeling this funny, fizzy, splashy feeling in my left
knee. I don't know. Be playful with it. It doesn't all have to make sense. It doesn't
all have to compute. Let yourself just be fully present to whatever shows up. I feel
an immense sense of pride for how I've grown and my ability to be with sadness, depression.
I remember I've been going to talk therapy for years and years ago I would, when my depression
was much more of a struggle, I would go into therapy and I'd just say to my therapist,
I'm so tired of being the sad girl. I don't want to come in here and be the sad girl.
It was a time where I was overly identifying with my feelings of sadness and instead of
saying I'm feeling sadness, I called myself the sad girl. I took on the identity of the
sad girl and I pitied this sad girl and I also felt shame about being the sad girl.
Now I'm just like, I'm a girl who gets sad sometimes. I'm a girl who knows how to be
with my sadness. I'm a girl who sometimes feels sorry for myself when I'm feeling sad, but
I also remember everybody feels sad sometimes and it's temporary and sadness comes and goes.
Now being able to alchemize my sadness and be with my sadness and move through my sadness
brings up feelings of joy for me and pride and like, wow, I'm able to move through all
of it. I'm able to be with it and that's just beautiful and I wish the same for every
human on this planet to be able to access the breadth and depth of their emotions. It
is deeply healing. This work is transformative. The more we can face ourselves, the more we
can be with ourselves, the more we can be with one another, the more we can hold each
other with loving compassion, the more we can build a world that's softer and more caring
and more just. It's deep work. It's important work. And with that, let's move into our mindfulness
practice for today. Find a comfortable position, a restful position that feels easeful and
if you like you can lie down, recline, sit, find any position that allows you to feel
fully supported. Once you're settling into your easeful posture, start connecting to
the breath. Take a deep breath in and let it go. Take a deep breath in and let it go.
Allow the eyes to close as you go inward. I'm going to guide you through a body scan.
Before we begin, notice if there are any prominent emotions present for you in this moment. As
we move through the body, notice if the emotions are manifest in any particular spot. Take
a deep breath in and let it go. Notice the top of the crown bringing your attention and
awareness down to the forehead, that spot right between the eyebrows. Notice all of
the muscles in the face and just allow them to soften. Let all expression leave your face.
In the jaw, let the tongue rest in the mouth. Notice your neck and shoulders. Take a deep
breath in and release. Notice the chest and the heart space and I invite you to gently
place your hands over the heart and breathe in here. Imagine a loving white light radiating
from the heart space. Imagine that glow extending outwards, just washing over your entire body.
Seeing that light expand into this beautiful, shiny white orb that's holding you with
love. Take a deep breath in and rest your hand on the belly. Notice the belly expand
as you inhale. Notice it contract as you exhale. Allow your hand to rest just below the belly
button. The pelvis, breathe into this space. Take a deep breath in here and let it go.
Let the hands rest at your side or in your lap and continue breathing. Notice the thighs.
Notice where your legs have contact with support beneath you. Notice your knees. Bring your
attention to your shins and your calves, your lower legs. Notice the ankles. Notice your
feet. Notice your tentoes and let them wiggle if they want. Take a deep breath in and let
it go. As we close our practice, imagine drawing in one last deep breath from the arches of
your heels below your feet and drawing that breath all the way up back up the body, all
the way up to the crown of the head. And just let out a big deep sigh. You can continue with
your inhale and exhale for a few moments as long as you wish. And whenever you feel ready,
go ahead and let the eyes flutter open. Notice the space you're in, perhaps turning on that
inner smile. And doing one last check in to notice what emotions are present in this moment.
Take a deep breath in, let it go.
Thank you so much for practicing with me today. Thank you so much for listening. If this episode
resonated with you, feel free to share it with a friend. And I look forward to sharing
space with you next time. Have a wonderful day.