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We've all been hurt. We all carry scars. We can all overcome these things and be

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healed through a relationship with Jesus Christ. Let's build that relationship

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together right here. Welcome to Healing Scars with Pastor Burton. Hey everybody,

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welcome to the sanctuary. It is so great to have you here. You know, this week

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we're going to be talking about something toxic that's been allowed to

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permeate our society and our culture. You know, many people try to attribute this

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as just being the men. However, let's be honest, it's become something that the

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ladies are just as guilty of. All of us are guilty of it. For a number of years

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now on both sides, you know, we used to call it machismo. You know, today we call

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it, you know, that it's toxic masculinity. However, they're just as

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people are just as toxic in how they attack it themselves. You know, the

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feminist of yesteryear have taken on the very traits that they used to be

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against and we're seeing it in everything. You know, girl power has turned from a

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demand to be seen as equals to anything you can do, I can do worse. You know,

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music, film, TV, literature, clothing, and so much more. You know, I want to remind

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you, sin is sin and it's like, you know, it's like fire. It consumes and destroys

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everything that it touches. Now, this came because of something I've seen

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recently. It's been making arounds and just the Lord put it on my heart so

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that's what today's message is coming from. You know, recently I saw a meme and

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it was being shared by a few people I know. You know, I read it and this is what

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it says. It says, when I get disrespected, I get disrespectful and every time I saw

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it posted by someone else, it had a bunch of likes and hearts and you know, some

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shares and comments that just cheering it on and really just kind of nasty

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comments at that. And I had to ask, isn't that what's become wrong in the world

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today? You know, people feel entitled to be disrespectful, arrogant, hottie, all

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because someone did or said something that they don't like. They'll talk about

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how people need to give respect to get respect, but they don't want to do it

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themselves. Nobody wants to be the bigger person. Instead, they want to try to be

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the tough guy and run their mouth. You know, or especially these days, the

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internet tough guys, the social media tough guys, you know, you know, and

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everybody else wants to join in instead of telling them that they sound like

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idiots and they do. You know, this isn't just wrong, it's un-Christian, it's

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un-biblical. It totally goes against what Jesus taught. If you turn with me to the

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book of Matthew chapter 22 and we're going to be going towards the end here,

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so Matthew 22 verses 36 through 40, the Bible says, Teacher, which is the greatest

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commandment in the law? Jesus replied, love the Lord your God with all your

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heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and

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greatest commandment and the second is like it. Love your neighbor as yourself

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and the law and the prophets hang on these two commandments. So let me ask, are

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you really showing love and compassion to someone by trying to one-up them as

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being the biggest jerk in the room? No! And how effective are you as an

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ambassador for Jesus when you're acting out of anger and spite? Anger and spite

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are forms of hate. We cannot show love when we're putting hate into the world.

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And, you know, while we're still here in Matthew, if you go back to chapter 5 verse

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13, so Matthew 5 verse 13, the Bible says, you are the salt of the earth but if the

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salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It's no longer good for

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anything except to be thrown out and trampled underfoot. As Christians, as

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followers of Christ, we're supposed to be the salt of the earth. What does salt do?

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It enhances things, it preserves things, it improves things. Instead, people choose

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to be salty towards one another. Our salt is wasted and it loses its flavor and

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in other words, salt loses its value or it becomes worthless. And so do we when we

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conform to the world. When we as Christians aren't always engaged in

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improving the world around us and pointing the way to Jesus, we lose our

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flavor, our salt. We lose value as a guide to Jesus. You know, here's the thing, one

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moment you're saying praise Jesus, the next minute you're trying to break

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someone down. You can't say I hope they burn in hell, praise Jesus. It doesn't

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work that way. You lose credibility as a follower of Jesus. You lose credibility

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as a Christian. Not only that, but since you are a representation, you know, or an

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ambassador of what people are seeing of Christians, you make the entire church

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look poorly when you do this. And it happens because we become more worldly

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and less godly. Now I'm not saying you can't be angry. You can be angry and

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still show compassion, still show mercy, still show love. You know, a lot of us,

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you know, that's really where the term, you know, bite your tongue comes from. You

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know, when a lot of us do it a lot more than we want to admit and others don't

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do it nearly enough, you know, I said you could be angry and still show love. We

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like to think that we can always control the situation, that we can always control

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the people that are in front of us. But the fact is, that's just not the case. No

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matter where you go, there are always going to be difficult people, people who

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will talk down to you, belittle you, ignore you, or put you down in some way.

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We're never going to be able to please everyone. I can't, you can't, no one can.

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And not everyone is going to like us. That's alright. We don't control those

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things. What we can control is ourselves, our actions, our thoughts, our words.

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You know, if you flip with me now to Ephesians chapter 4. So Ephesians chapter

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4, we're looking at verses 31 through 32. So Ephesians 4 verses 31 through 32, the

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Bible says, get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling, and slander,

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along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another,

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forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you. See, Paul is warning us

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of controlling what we say and what we do. That's what I just said, you know,

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about holding your tongue. You know, instead of meeting hate with hate, we need to look

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to the Lord and forgive. We need to remember we're not perfect by any means

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either. We've all done absolutely heinous things in the sight of the Lord, yet God

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still forgave us. And we need to do the same for those who are doing heinous

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things in front of us or to us. Think of it this way, Jesus was able to forgive

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the same people who crucified him. So why can't we forgive those who upset us? We

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need to. If we turn back to Matthew chapter 5, so Matthew chapter 5 verses

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21 through 24, the Bible says, you have heard that it was said to the people

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long ago, you shall not murder, and anyone who murders will be subject to

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judgment. But I tell you that anyone who is angry with a brother or sister will

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be subject to judgment. Again, anyone who says to a brother or sister,

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raka, raka being an aromatic term of contempt. So anyone who says to a

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brother or sister, raka, is answerable to the court. And anyone who says, you fool,

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will be in danger of the fire of hell. Therefore, if you are offering your gift

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at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something

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against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be

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reconciled to them. Then come and offer your gift. See, in anger here it's

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referring to bitterness towards someone. Bitterness, it's a type of anger. See,

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anger, it's a sin, just like murder. When the Pharisees read this

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law from Exodus 20 verse 13, they applied it literally, literally. If someone

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hadn't physically killed someone, then they were fine. However, Jesus taught

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that by allowing our anger to build in a fester, that we commit murder in our own

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hearts. So because we're angry, we're committing murder in our own hearts.

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Where's the love then? Where is it? See, anger, it's a terrible sin because it

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disregards the command to love one another. Not only that, but by allowing it

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to fester, we can lose control of ourselves and go even deeper into sin,

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sin that can and should be avoided. In 1st John chapter 4, so turn with me now

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to 1st John chapter 4 verses 20 through 21. So 1st John chapter 4, 20 through 21,

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the Bible says, whoever claims to love God yet hates a brother or sister is a

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liar. For whoever does not love their brother and sister whom they have seen

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cannot love God whom they have not seen. And he has given us this command, anyone

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who loves God must also love their brother and sister. The way we act, the

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way we talk and treat one another, it's a reflection of our relationship with God.

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And God is love. It's not always easy. As a matter of fact, sometimes it's just

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downright tough. Being a Christian is tough, and it's supposed to be. The world

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goes the easy route. The world is looking for convenience, luxury, but they miss

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Jesus in the process. We miss Jesus when we're blinded by our own rage instead of

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looking to Jesus. In Matthew chapter 7 verses 13 and 14, so Matthew 7 13 and 14,

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the Bible says, enter through the narrow gate for the wide gate, excuse me, for

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the wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction. And many

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enter through it, but small is the gate and narrow is the road that leads to

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life and only a few find it. Don't give in to the hate. Don't give into the

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discontent of the world or you'll miss the gate. Jesus didn't tell us what to

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do just for us to ignore it. It wasn't a do as I say type of thing. Jesus told us,

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hey, this is what you need to do, and then he set the example of what we need to do.

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He set the example by doing it. Living the way he's taught us is not the way of

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the world. It's not the popular way to live, but it is the right way to live and

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the right way to do things. There is no exception to be made on this. This is

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literally the Lord's way or the highway, the highway to hell.

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Jesus didn't say do this unless, do this except for, or but if they do this

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instead. No, he just said do this and then after he said do this he taught us how.

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It's very much the same concept many of us have found in training for our own

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jobs. This might sound familiar to some of you. Watch one, do one, teach one. We

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can see Jesus doing it in the Bible. We apply it to ourselves and then we teach

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others as a part of our testimony when we share the gospel. So it's not that

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we're not equipped. It's that we need to actually use what we've been given to do

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what is right. We live in a society today that listens to react instead of

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listening to hear. So when something happens we'll often hear someone rush to

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use scripture in the wrong context. They try to weaponize it. When people,

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you know, people they're quick to pull the trigger on their quest for vengeance

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by saying things like, you know, an eye for an eye. You know, we've all heard that

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one before. We've all heard it. You know, eye for an eye. They use, you know, they

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try to take the scripture. They've heard this piece. They try to weaponize it.

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And they're totally wrong in how they do it. You know, they're, people are

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very, very wrong when they say it. For one, most people when they say it they

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don't even know where it comes from. They don't, so you know, if you don't know

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where it comes from how do you understand the context? What is it talking

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about? You know, ask people and they'll say, oh the Bible. Where'd it come from? The

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Bible. And that's as good as it gets. That's as far as they can break it down.

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They don't know if it's Old Testament. They don't know if it's New Testament.

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They don't know anything else. They just know that they've heard it before and

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that's how they've heard it. So that's how they use it. It's twisted. It's

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contorted, you know, contorted and changed. Because that's what the devil

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wants. So and you know, that's why they don't understand the context of what

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it's really talking about. So let's pull it up. Flip all the way back towards the

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beginning of your Bible to the book of Exodus. We'll read it together. So Exodus

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chapter 21. And what you're looking for is verses 23 through 25. The Bible says,

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but if there is serious injury you are to take life for life, eye for eye, tooth

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for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot, burn for burn, wound for wound, bruise for

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bruise. So in itself, without context, it seems sound. What's good for the goose

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is good for the gander, right? However, when you look at the entirety of this

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piece of scripture going from verse 12 all the way through verse 35, you'll find

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that it's actually very legalistic. And for a good reason. It's legalistic

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because it's meant to be a judicial punishment or a type of case law, if you

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will, for the judges of the law of the land at that time to make the ruling

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from and decide appropriate actions and repercussions for wrongdoing. Not for

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individuals to justify being the bigger jerk. Not to try to one-up people.

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Alright, not for a quest of vengeance. It was actually supposed to be a tool to

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ensure that punishments fit the crime and to help bring order and peace to

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communities instead of justifying lynch mobs. Let's face it, there's a lot

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of internet lynch mobs today. Cancell culture has gotten out of control.

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People try to twist this. Like I said, it's because they don't

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truly know what it's about. It's just a catchphrase or a slogan to justify being

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petty. Well, he started it. I'm only doing to them what they did to me. If she had

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done that, I wouldn't have done this. Petty. Petty. Sin being met with sin. Hate

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being met with hate. Two wrongs don't make a right. Period. They don't. And this

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is why in Matthew, Jesus actually revisits this. And when Jesus

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revisits, he's doing it to bring clarity to what we should do. So if we go all the

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way back to Matthew chapter 5 again. Alright, so Matthew chapter 5 and we're

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looking at verses 38 through 42. Jesus says, you have heard that it was said, eye

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for eye and tooth for tooth, but I tell you, do not resist an evil person. If

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anyone slaps you on the right cheek, turn to them the other cheek also. And if

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anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well. If

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anyone forces you to go one mile, go with them two miles. Give to the one who

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asked you and do not turn away from the one who wants to borrow from you. Getting

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even is the wrong reaction. We just looked at this study in our study of

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Naum. You know, instead Jesus wants to, you know, what he's telling us is that we

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need to love those who treat us poorly. To love them. Not get back at them, but

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to love and to forgive. Instead of staying focused on what happened to us

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and continuing on to build this victim mentality that's so popular

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today, we should be looking to God to give us the strength to love and to

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forgive others as he did us when we sinned. Instead of thinking about how

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to make things, you know, even Stevens, if you would, you know, trying to even that

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ball field or anything, you know, instead of trying to find ways to get back, what

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we should do is pray for those who have wronged us. Pray. That's the right way.

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That's the Christian way. That's Jesus's way. You know, people used to ask, what

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would Jesus do? That's it. Right here. Right here. Turn with me to Luke chapter

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6 and we're going to look at verses 27 through 36. Jesus, you know, he, when we're

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looking at that section, Jesus goes all in on talking about loving your enemies

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and he's specifically calling out how to respond to those who do you wrong. And

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when we look at Luke 6, specifically verse 35 in this section, the Bible says,

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but love your enemies, do good to them, and lend to them without expecting to

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get anything back. Then your reward will be great and you will be children of the

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Most High because he is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked. You see, to love

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someone who's offended us, it doesn't come naturally. You know, that's not part

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of the human state. Now, you don't have to fall in love with people like this.

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It's a different type of love. All right. It's not like, you know, when you look to

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your significant other or your children and, you know, you do anything for them,

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you know, and it just comes naturally no matter what happens. Well, you know, we

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have to kind of apply it the same way because you think about it. Somebody does,

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you know, someone that you love, like say your child goes and does something that

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they shouldn't. Are you gonna get upset? Yes. But are you gonna love them any

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less? No. Absolutely not. See, it's a mindset and it's an action on your part.

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To love an enemy, to love an enemy is to put violence to the side, to put your

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aggression and your anger to the side, and instead act in their best interest.

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So, to love your enemy is to act in their best interest. Not to get back at them,

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but to show empathy, grace, mercy. See, we may not know why they're acting the way

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they are or do the things that they do, or maybe we do, and it's not how we act,

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you know, it's not how we believe, you know, they should act. It's not how we

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think we would act if we were in their shoes. So, we should pray. Pray for a

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change in their life, a change to soften their heart. Pray for healing. Healing?

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Yes, healing. Because hurt people hurt people. Let me say that again. Hurt

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people hurt people. They may not even realize that they're doing it, or they've

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been indoctrinated into a way that blinds them to the very wrongs that

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they're doing. They could be lashing out because they feel safe to do so because

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of something going on in their lives. Have you ever thought about that? Someone might

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be lashing out at you because they feel safe with you and that they can do it

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with you? You know, maybe it could be that they're just having a bad day and

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you are the person that the Lord has put in front of them so they can unload

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their burden, unload their aggression. Well, why? Why would he do that? Well,

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easy, because you can take it. You can take it and then show them his love in

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return. We all need to recognize that we have a habit of pushing out people who

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need the most help, who need the most love. We'll cast them to the side because

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of their sins. We like to think that we're above them, like as if we're above

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reproach. However, when we look at Luke 23 verse 34, we see that Jesus does the

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opposite of what we do. In Jesus 23 verse 34, Jesus said, Father forgive them for

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they do not know what they are doing and they divided his clothes up by casting

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lots. Jesus was on the cross, like he was already on the cross. He was dying. He had

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been mocked, ridiculed, embarrassed. He was in pain and dying a slow, horrible

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death. And what does he do? Does he lash out and say, oh you'll pay for this? Does he

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threaten anybody? Does he try to act tough? Oh, just you wait. I'm gonna be swimming

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with the fishes by the end of the day. No, he didn't do any of the stupid stuff.

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Instead, he prays. He prays for everyone, the Jewish leaders, the Romans, the

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bystanders, every single person there and every person involved in leading him

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there, including you and me for the sins we've committed in our lives. Because

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he took on our sin. He paid the price for our sin. So when he could have

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lashed out, destroyed everyone and everything, he chose to show us mercy and

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love instead. The way that we should do things. Love and mercy. In John 21, I'd

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like to point something out. It's very minimalized. It shouldn't be. In John 21,

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the Bible... Let me give you a second here. Bear with me. I'm flipping through here.

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Thought I had it written down here, but I don't. So, there it is. Yes. All right. So

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John chapter 21 verses 18 through 22, the Bible says, very truly I tell you, when

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you were younger and dressed yourself and went where you wanted, but when you

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were old, you will stretch out your hands and someone else will dress you and lead

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you to where you do not want to go. Jesus said this to indicate the kind of death

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by which Peter would glorify God. And then he said to him,

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follow me. Peter turned and saw that the disciple whom Jesus loved was following

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them. This was the one who had leaned back against Jesus at the supper and had

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said, Lord, who is going to betray you? When Peter saw him, he asked, Lord, what

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about him? And Jesus answered, if I want him to remain alive until I return, what

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is that to you? You must follow me. See, this is important because it shows the

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heart of Jesus. It shows the heart. See, the focus shouldn't be on anyone other

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than Jesus. Even in the face of an uncertain and possibly terrifying future,

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we need to be focused on him. And let's face it, sometimes we see things we know

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something's coming, we know a storm is coming and it's brutal, and we get

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focused on it instead of looking to Jesus. See, and instead of what we should

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do is instead of trying to compare ourselves or bolster ourselves because

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we've been embarrassed or hurt, we need to ensure that what we're doing is

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what's right by Jesus. And I bring this up because we like to think that to be a

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Christian simply means to love Jesus. And I, you know, it's, yes, it's true.

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We need to love Jesus, absolutely. 100%, you know, that is at the core of

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being a Christian. However, it also means we need to love Judas. We need to love

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the Judases in our lives. We need to love our enemies and like Jesus, pray for them

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and show them love. Now again, we have this habit. We push people away who need

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help the most, who need love the most, like we're better than them. But we fail

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to see our own sin. We fail to see our own sin. In Luke 18 verses 9 through 14, so

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starting with me to Luke 18 verses 9 through 14, and 9 through 14 the Bible

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says, to some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on

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everyone else, Jesus told this parable. Two men went up to the temple to pray,

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one a Pharisee, the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood by himself and prayed,

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God, I thank you that I am not like other people, robbers, evildoers, adulterers, or

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even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I

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get. But the tax collector stood at a short distance. He would not even look up

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to heaven, but beat his breast and said, God, have mercy on me, a sinner. I tell

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you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For all

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those who exalt themselves will be humbled, and those who humble themselves

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will be exalted. See, we become the Pharisee in our own lives so easily when

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we're hurt, when we're upset. We become very self-righteous. We're hypocrites. We

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become hypocrites, and we want others to see that we're so good, and others are so

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bad, that we're so much better than these other people. It's because of our own

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pride, our egos, our pride gets the better of us. We forget that God loves

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those that we don't, but we should. We should absolutely love them. See, this is

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why Jesus warned us to look inside. If you go to Matthew chapter 7 verses 1

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through 5, Jesus says, do not judge or you too will be judged, for in the same way

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you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be

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measured to you. Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother's eye

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and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye? How can you say to your

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brother, let me take the speck out of your eye, when all the time there's a

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plank in your own eye? You hypocrite! First take the plank out of your own eye,

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then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother's eye. See, it's

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so, you know, it's easy to justify tearing someone else down, and what's worse is

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that there's almost someone else there to cheer you on. That's the chaos that the

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devil wants. That's the way of the world, and we get, you know, a temporary rush

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when it happens. You know, like I said, it says right here, you know, we're blinded by

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our own, by our own sin, by our own, you know, mistakes, our own rage, our own hate,

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our own anger, you know. Like I said, we get a temporary rush when, when it

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happens, and it can make us feel good for a moment. Hey, hey, yeah, hmm, show them.

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But for just a moment, and then afterwards we kind of think on it. Maybe

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it doesn't catch up to you right away, but eventually it's like, man, did I

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handle that the right way? Should I have done something different? Well, yeah,

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absolutely. Or sometimes you realize it, you're like, man, I didn't do that the best

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way, but then we don't go back to correct ourselves even. It's because it's not

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what was right to do. Instead, what we should be doing is looking for ways to

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build each other up, to empower each other, to do better, and to look to Jesus.

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Seeing a total change in a person, because the Holy Spirit in them, seeing

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them turn to Jesus and turn their lives around, is so much more rewarding.

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And that brings all of us closer to Jesus. Now, that's not the easy path. It's

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certainly not the popular path. It is, however, the right path. So when you're

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disrespected, don't get disrespectful. Don't have a mindset that says, your

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attitude is the result, or excuse me, that my attitude is the result of your

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actions. Instead, get humble. Get humble. Exercise some self-discipline. Now, in the

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Marine Corps, it's what we call, you know, reaching down and grabbing some

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intestinal fortitude. But get humble. Exercise self-discipline. Be respectful.

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Pray. Pray. Pray for them. Pray for yourself. Pray for all parties involved.

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And let the love of Jesus shine through you. Let our strength in the Almighty

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become the hope in another person's darkness, in their time of need, in their

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time of hurt. That's love. That's what love is. That's power. That's how we take

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the fight to the devil. That's how, that is, that's God in us. That is the Holy

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Spirit in us. That's the hope of Jesus for you, for me, and for everyone. For

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everyone. That's how we should behave. That's how we should respond. That's what

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Jesus has told us to do. And that's what leads others to Him. That is how you

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truly are the better person. Not because of you, not because of your actions, but

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because you're listening and following Jesus and doing as He said. I want to

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thank you for joining us today. If you have any questions, prayer requests, or

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would like to know more about our ministry, you can find us on our website

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at BeTheLightSanctuary.org or on Facebook at BeTheLightSanctuary. We'll

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catch you next time. God bless.