Five, six, seven. Oh, see what I did there? That
was... That was... Paper one went terribly, because
I missed that question. Oh, that... It was an
eight marker. It was really hard. I wrote a load
of crap. Absolute crap. It was really hard. I'm
happy with my English language. I got... Hello
and welcome back to the Stupid Opinion of Tianga's
podcast. Hello! I'm Jemima McVitie, the people,
the reason, the person you're here for. I don't
know. Yeah, they are here for Jemima. They're
here for me. Sorry. I heard it here first. She's
here for me. Who isn't here for Jemima? Who isn't
here for me? Me. Who are you here for then, Will?
I'm a people's man. Oh, thank you. So you're
JJ, are you? What? Sorry? JJ, the Spider -Man.
JJ? Yeah. Or Miles Morales. I'm deeply in love
with Miles Morales. Did you know that? Which
one? Cartoon or? Oh, any version. He's just got
the swagger. Wow, right. Okay, anyway. Hello,
welcome back, ladies and gentlemen. As you can
see, this podcast drifts whenever it has a moment
to. Don't, don't. That was not there when we
started. No, it's moo. I'm sorry, I just saw
that. Don't worry. The audio from us screaming.
Oh, is it loud, is it? Sorry, headphones. We'll
keep them rolling. We're going to continue. Yes,
that's exactly what we're going to do. I'm going
to start this segment off with... Stop. This
is exciting. He's reached down to get something.
I've got something. Now, you guys are not going
to be excited with this. Now, addictions. Obsessions,
not addictions, obsessions. It's Pokemon cards.
It is Pokemon cards. Now, ever since Christmas
last year, I stopped collecting Pokemon cards.
I had a really bad year. I got barely anything.
And my mum, the people who bought the money,
bought the cards for me, had lost a lot of money.
And me, because I buy some extras to open up
on Christmas Day with Evie last year. And we
didn't get a lot, did we? No. No. She's listening.
No, we didn't get a lot. But recently I've had
the urge. To go back. Well, you're not really
having a bit of a struggle with addiction right
there. You know, if you get the urge for it,
it's okay to do it again. Of course it is. Can
you just... Context? No, just never mind. Never
mind. We've got cake. We have cake. Lemon drizzle.
No, it's not even in the subject. We've got cake.
Get out the Pokemon cards. Now, what's up? Because
Evie has an obsession at the moment. And what
is that obsession? Every time Evie comes over,
she hops on the PlayStation to play Minecraft.
She's a Minecraft girl. You're a Minecraft girl?
You know that I go between Minecraft and Spider
-Man, right? Oh, really? When I've built something
in Minecraft, I will go on Spider -Man for a
bit. That's a 16 -rated game. You shouldn't be
playing that. You're the one who made me play
in the first place! Listen, okay, the clock's
mostly part of the conversation. Shut it off.
Turn it on. I don't know how it works. This is
the one I had when Nanny and Grandad went off
on holiday. You just... Back to my conversation.
So Evie likes Minecraft. She's really bad at
killing the creepers, everybody. They are really
annoying. They blow up my dogs. Dogs. I don't
really know anything about Minecraft. I'm not
really a Minecraft guy. I tame all my dogs. Gold.
I got the diamonds. I did. I got them. She likes
to switch between cheating and... No, I do. That's
only because when I've got to build stuff, I
try to get the blocks in. Because you can't find
concrete just lying around, can you? For coloured
buildings. Can you? Can you, mate? Your accent
goes all over the place. That's one thing I've
noticed today. Yeah, it does. It flicks between,
like, Yorkshire. Like Manchester and like Cornwall
all at once. I go between accents quite a lot.
I can go from being like really, yeah, what do
you want, man? To going very posh like Will.
Classic London. To going a bit like... Will's
accent's not that... I go quite posh like Will
sometimes. We've got quite similar accents. Yes,
yeah, we're quite... No, no, Jeremy's got a different...
Jeremy's got a different... You guys are both
well -spoken, yeah. But Jeremy's got a different
accent to Will. We're not posh like each other.
No, we're not. We're not like... That's disgusting.
But yeah, we're well spoken. I'm not. Pokemon
cards. Pokemon cards. Now... Where did mine come
into this, Will? It was addiction and I wanted
to just tell everyone that your addiction is
real. So... Thanks! I bought this card. Now,
can I have some predictions how much I bought
this for? My first purchase... Too much money.
It is Japanese. Since... My first purchase since...
Christmas last year. I don't want it to be, but
I'm going to say £25. I was going to say £30
-plus. I'll let you see it now. That's a nice
card. Sorry? Surely that's bad if it's got writing
on it. Surely that lowers the price. It's on
the case, isn't it? It's on the sleeve. Oops.
No, it's not on the ruddy sleeve. It's on the
sleeve. Sleeve! Now I have to damage my chances
of getting a PSA 10 just to show this turd. Look
at that. It shines beautifully. It's beautiful.
People. Is it a trainer card? No, it's not a
bloody trainer card. It's a bloody whale. It's
a whale and a fish. It's a bloody whale. Not
a trainer card. Not a trainer card. The one with
the yellow corners. It's a whale. Tag team. That's
it. How much do you think it is? So you said
20, 23, 25? I'm saying 22 pounds for that. I
said 30 plus. It's quite a nice card. It's been
mint condition. It's Japanese. It's got to be
worth quite a bit. There's a nick at the bottom.
Okay, I'm taking it down to £19. £28. By the
way, if I had this graded at £10, so when it's
put in a plastic slab, it would be worth about...
No, it would be worth about £400. No, it wouldn't.
Don't lie. It's a piece of card with a bloody
weight on it. It would be. There's a card for
over £1 ,000. That's PSA, isn't it? I literally
own one of those PSA cards on my bookshelf. No,
that was worth about £30. You told me I would
make hundreds. No, no, but the market's inflating,
so it may increase in price. I paid £43 for this.
£43. Nah. I told you it was £40 plus. £43. For
one card. Please tell me you're joking, William.
No, and I'm not done there. Look me in the eyes
and tell me you paid £43 for that. I paid £43
for this son of a... You look so sorry for him.
I'm a fish. Well, you've just earned money on
your new cafe job and now you're bloody spending
it on a whale. I'm... It makes it sound like
he's sponsoring one of those whales in, like,
Antarctica or something. How do you think he's
sponsoring a whale in Antarctica? Probably be
a better cause, to be honest. I'm going to send
that off to get graded. And I really, really
want it to make a 10. It won't make a 10 now
I've seen it, which is unfortunate. But yeah,
that's my addiction. And I thought you guys should
know that I am going back into it now. I'm committed,
fully committed. Brilliant. Before we move on,
Jav, have you got any addictions? Yeah. Addictions,
that's right. That's a good question. Something
that you just can't stop. Like, can't stop. Say
it's like a TV show. Like, can't stop watching
it. I do like toast. I do have an addiction.
I do. My addiction is really niche. What does
niche mean? Abstract. Sorry. The program Outnumbered.
Do you know it? No. Australian. English. Australian.
English. It's like this family. And they're based
in Little House. I think it's in like, I don't
know. Can I get a guess here? Is it to do with
a big family? Not really. There's only four of
them. Five of them. Basically, it's comedy. But
the kids were improvising the lines as they filmed
the show. So it's hilarious. I recommend it.
That's really my only addiction. When was it
made? Oh, well, years ago now, it's really old.
Like 90s, 80s, 2000s, 2010s. You're a controlled
person then. I don't really get addicted to things,
really. I do. I get very addicted to things.
I will find something, obsess, addict over it,
and then I'll just go completely off it. Music.
Bands. Bands, Minecraft, everything. Just certain
bands that I'll go on and off. That's interesting.
I don't know why. Do you not do that? I do. I
get very pissed. I was very pissed with Green
Day. I've gotten off them a bit now. I think
my new obsession is MCR. MCR? Is that K -pop?
No, they are not K -pop. No, it's not. They're,
let's just say, emo, yeah. Oh, yes. It's rock,
it's not emo. Do you know what emo actually means?
It's a shortened version of emotional, right?
Yeah, that is exactly what you are. Be nice!
I just kicked him under the table and I don't
believe you. Okay, anyway. But they're not. I'm
actually going to see them next year. Really?
Emos? They're not. They're classed as emo rock,
but then again, some of their music isn't. Some
of their music isn't. So they are emo. I'm confused.
Are they emo or are they not emo? Okay, I'm going
to set you up. They are emo is what we're getting
at. By the way, we're eating, I don't know if
we mentioned cake. Yes, do you remember what
we did? Do you remember what we talked about
today? Lemon drizzle. Lemon drizzle. British.
We've got cake. British. This is written all
over it there, lads. Official mug. Check it out.
Merch. We're branding. People consider them as
emo. People consider them as emo, although their
band's music is alternative rock and pop punk
and punk rock, but it also needs different things.
Their aesthetic is emo, but their music isn't.
That's what you pretty much said there. Do you
know what? I stand for it. Maybe I'll try listening
to some emo music before we next record and I'll
give my review next time. No, listen. Their music
is heavier than emo music. Listen, emo music
is more like Panic at the Disco, Pierce the Veil.
My conclusion is it's a completely different
type of disco. Slow down, man. Sorry. Okay, so
emo sounds more like Panic at the Disco. I'm
sorry to break it to you, but I have no idea
what that is. I don't know what any of these
are. It's fine, it's fine. And Pierce the Veil
type of stuff, okay? Yeah. But my conclusion
is it's got more like rock. punk type of sound
to them. Right. They sound less emo than the
other bands do. They're a bit more like the Beatles.
Yeah. They're not like emo Beatles. No. Emo Beatles.
They are the emo cousins of them. In the black
submarine. We all live in the... Yeah, but it's
emo. Five, six, seven, eight. We all live in
the black submarine. Sorry, Chubb. You say this.
We need to stop ganging up on anything. I don't
mind classing them as emo. It's just when people
go like, oh, you listen to an emo band. You are
emo. Yeah, well, you do that. Yeah, you do do
it. You call me emo all the time, Will. You go,
oh, yeah, she's emo. She's such an emo kid. State
the facts. Just the facts, Will Jones. It's not
a fact. It's not a fact. Just the facts. Very
smart, very smart. Moving on. We're really on
a tangent. What were we talking about? Addiction.
We're past addiction. Hot goss, is it? You guys
are going to do your... What was it? Hot off
the table. Okay, hang on. We've got a brand new
segment. It's called... Hot off the table. No.
Hot off the group chat. a brand new segment for
you. It's crazy. It's called... Hot off the group
chat. Now explain. Me? Well, they'd like to make
this segment of where I have got it from my age
group. Yeah, we don't know. Because I'm younger
than them. That is so old. Like two years ago.
That's from a long time ago. Gossip. I'm not
very into gossip that much. Oh, I don't believe
that. You're a girl. You're a girl. You're a
girl. It's true. It's true. Girls are always
a goss. Right, come on. Spill the beans. Or an
actual group chat. Just anything. What's been
going on? What's the hot goss? What has Kylie
said to Maya? You know, that kind of thing. But
don't use their names. Yeah, you can use fake
names. There is no Kylie, there's no Maya in
my school. There is now. Okay. I think the most
recent gossip I remember is... So on our actual
group chat, we've got this year eight group chat,
obviously. So this girl, Leavers... Carry on,
carry on. This girl, we're going to call her...
Aula. Aula. Aula, okay. We're going to call her
Aula. She's on the group chat and you know how
the biggest new thing to sit down is like six,
seven. Yeah, we learned about this last time.
Six, seven. Should we have a practice? Five,
six, seven. Oh, see what I did there? That was
subtle. Thank you. Okay, okay. So, ready? Yeah.
You guys have got to do it because I can't do
it. Oh, we're doing it. I'm holding a microphone.
Six, seven. It's so weird. You have to go like
this with your hands. Six, seven. Not a shimmy
well, it's like... Six, seven. Did we do it good?
You did it alright, just well. Because what we
were doing next, you're like, no, I didn't do
it in the well, and I was like, yeah. Stop. Sorry.
It sounded like you were talking Welsh. I got
really bad speech, right? You know, you're doing
a dance, okay? It's more like... Anyway. Carry
on. Anyway. So all of a sudden, she said, like,
one message, right? And it said, six, seven.
Okay. And so this girl I usually be friends with,
let's call her Maya. Oh, Maya. And she goes,
shut the hell up to her. That's bad. And then
she's having a go at it, saying, you're so annoying.
What is wrong with you? Oh, my gosh. You just
need to shut up sometimes. It's not true. And
then this other girl, another girl, her friend.
Wait, who's friend? Maya's friend. Yeah, Maya's
friend. Let's call her Kylie. Kylie. Ooh. She
comes, she starts, she starts joining in. It's
like, I say like, oh my God, you're just an annoying
person. They're getting up on all of us. You're
so, you're so weird. Nobody likes you, there's
something wrong with you. You don't know, you
don't need to, you don't need to, you don't need
to just shut up and be left alone. So then, um,
Alda's friend. Yeah. Cool, let's call her, let's
call her Gwen. Oh, yeah, nice. Sorry. Let's call
her Gwen. She comes on. She's like, you guys
don't need to stop being mean to her. She doesn't
know how much. She sent, like, one message. There's
nothing wrong with that. Yeah. Like, there's
really nothing wrong with that. So then Maya
comes back, and she's like, okay, you guys need
to stop talking right now. You guys never shut
up on this group chat. You just need to stop.
Just stop, okay? You don't like Maya? No, Maya's
a bit of a, you know, I own the place. I'm a
popular kid. She is. So, the admin on the group
chat. Oh, the person that can remove people?
Yes. Let's call him Jimmy. He comes into this,
okay? And he's like, what's happening? He's the
main character. He is, he's the admin. And so
he's like, okay. And so they tell him what happened,
and then he's like, alright. Just look back at
the old messages, you brat. You don't have to
tell him what happened. He removes Orla. And
he removes Gwen. What? Why is Maya not being
removed? Why is Maya still on the group chat?
This is outrageous. Now we've got another group
chat from the Minecraft group chat. Is it one
without Maya? Please tell me you made one without
Maya. It is. But the admin on our group chat
is the same one on that one. And he decides to
remove her from that one as well. What? So who
did he move? He removed Orla. Okay. Clearly,
Mr. Admin thinks... He has a thing for Maya.
He has a thing for Maya. Yes, yes. It's blatantly
obvious. Yes, he's like, he wants to be in with
a popular lad. He wants a girlfriend. He removes
her from the group chat, okay? And so Orla, she
gets this message from a girl who's friends with
Maya and Kylie. Let's call her Molly. Okay, so
hang on. Orla does... Oh, yeah, okay. So, Molly
comes in. She's texting her privately as well.
like she's got she's found her number she's like
texting her like what the hell are you doing
why are you being so mean to why are you being
so mean to maya why is everyone getting up and
all this isn't nice is it thing so this is like
um my phone goes off at a certain time obviously
so i was not here for this when this happened
because i was like nighttime yeah so she so they
would just buy themselves at this point They
were texting up. She's like, how did you get
my number? Can you just leave me alone? And for
some reason, Gwen started crying. Wait, who's
Gwen? I don't know. She's the friend. She's the
friend, okay. And so after this, right, Maya
and Kylie are on the group chat saying how annoying
she is. She's typical girly. Bitchy behaviour.
And ever since they removed Maya and Gwen. No,
not Maya. No, Orla. Orla, yeah. There has been
no talking on the group chat for like a week.
Wow. Because she... End of an era. People liked
talking to her. People really liked her. People
liked talking to her because she was like a nice...
She's a nice person. She's a really nice person.
She's one of my friends actually. I feel bad
for Orla. Yeah. Give all of my condolences. And
they all ganged up on her as well. Oh, so were
you just a bystander in this, reading the messages?
I was, like, a day after reading the messages.
So I was, like, scrolling through, like, oh,
my God, what the hell happened here? Just because
she said 6 -7 one time. Yeah, one message. That's
where 6 -7 gets you. I mean, she probably stepped
the line there. She did step the line, but the
overreaction was, yeah, it was an overreaction.
It was ridiculous. It was. But, yeah, 6 -7. say
that. That's ridiculous. What an outcry. That
was some hot goss. That was crazy. The year 8
drama is hustling and bustling. It is. Don't
get that in what are we in year 12. 12 that's
it. Sad. We used to have that sort of drama.
Now we're just specks. Specks of dust. No the
thing is year 12 is more important than year
8 though. Yeah exactly. You get more recognition.
You get more respected. That's true, but... We're
treated like dirt. We are not treated well. Year
7's got all the fancy treatment. They're like
angels. They are. So did you have the prime year
last year? Nah. Because my head of year is such
an annoying person. I thought you were going
to say something else then. I was like, easy.
But no. Anyway. But she is so annoying because
she is really... She can be nice. She's a history
teacher. She's got that boring aspect to her
as well as that mean aspect to her. I've known
a few boring history teachers in my time. I know
who you're thinking of. You've got to look at
us so sideways, I'm scared. Biscuits. Yeah. Yeah,
yeah, yeah. Can I think of any more gossip? Any
more gossip, yeah. Grab a bit of popcorn or a
cup of tea, anyone? Grab a pause and press the
pause button. We can have a conversation while
I think. Okay, well, I will bring up a conversation
if that's okay. Go for it. Oh, and this is the
main one that I thought we'd bring up. We stole
things. Shut up. We were quite the thief artists
back in Ireland. Please tell me this is not from
an actual shop. No, no, it's not from an actual
shop. You'll like where it's from. No, so not
from actual shops. No, from... Holiday Club.
And aftercare. From holiday... I knew it. Didn't
we say come from the... Good news. Yeah, the
good news. Yeah, well, that's like a... Charity
place, pretty much. Stole from the charity. You
stole from the charity? No. We were really good
people. I think I also stole from... You know,
like brownies. I stole the teddy. So they give
you a teddy, you know, from... They give you,
like, a teddy bear, like a book, and you've got
to, like, write about your journey with the teddy,
right? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I stole the teddy.
You stole the teddy. And what did you say to
them? I couldn't find it. You couldn't find it?
Because it was, like, after COVID. Why didn't
you just give it back? Because of Will. He told
me to keep it. Oh, Will. It was, like, after
COVID, and they were like, I had to go back,
and Will was like, keep it. Just keep it. They
don't need it. They can get another one. That's
awful. And they got another one. They got a massive
one now. So Evie had a little tiddler and they
had a big... So she kind of helped them out.
Yeah. So do you still have it? Yeah. Oh my gosh.
We're going to have to bring it into this room.
We are. Now I did... I stole from Holiday Club.
Let's explain what that is. So it's like a kind
of... So in the summer holidays or the half term,
you can go to school and then do a little club.
Yeah, but it's not like lessons and stuff. It's
just like activities and art. Like going to what's
it called? Go on, try it. The Beach Place. Western
Supermare. There you go. Western Supermare, yeah.
Long trip. Yeah. Long trip. Long trip. Very long
trip. Nicky. Nicky. I will just say her actual
name because... I did go. Yes, Maya did go. Now,
what I stole from One Day Club is... I'll name
a few. You know, Ben 10, his watch. I remember
that. That's why we have two. That's why we had
two. Yeah, but this one was better. This one
was the original Ben 10 watch. I also stole a
little notepad of a monkey with a French outfit
on. Oh, that's random. Very random. But from
the charity, I stole a Pokemon figure. He's in
the other room. Why didn't you just buy it? It
was probably only like £1. It was probably, yeah.
It was free. It was free. I know, we weren't
very good civilians. No, you weren't very good
civilians. We really weren't. And you can't come
and arrest us because it's an old crime and plus...
We did give them back. We borrowed them. Sure.
Definitely. About Holiday Club, you know my brother.
Yes. He's a very well, like he wouldn't do things
like that. No. You know what I mean. He's a very
proper man. You work at Holiday Club. He doesn't
do cheeky things, but this is one of the only
times I've ever seen my brother angry. He's also
a very calm guy. You know him. He's just a very
nonchalant guy, my brother. Yes. No. So, basically,
my mum works, well, she used to work at the school
in which we used to attend. Yes. So, she would
donate our old toys to the holiday club sometimes.
Really? To be nice. Yeah. So, you might have
stolen something of mine. Yeah. Was it the men's
head watch? Sadly not, but I wish I did. It was
called my phone. But, no. My brother's car collection
got sent to the aftercare without my brother's
consent. I hate it when parents do this. And
Bertie didn't know this. And my mum was like,
oh, I just lost it, Bert. I don't know where
it's gone after he was complaining. We went to
holiday club. He goes, do you mind if we come
over here? I go over. His whole car. And he was
like, I hate it. I'll show you what I'm going
to do later. So I go away. And then we get into
the car later. He opens up his bag and I'm like...
Oh, the car just... There's over 50 just... Ran
into his bag. He's showing me and he's like,
don't tell mum. So we're in the car home and
I'm like, I'm like scared, like, what if mum
finds out? And she's like... And I was like,
don't know why. And my brother was like, yeah,
don't know why. And we get home and he puts them
all back on his shelf where they were before.
That night when my parents were talking. the
pressure. I would actually lie for Will. That's
good. Especially when he cut my hair. Apparently
I was like, oh yeah, I cut my hair myself. I
definitely wasn't Will. I wasn't nothing. I would
always hit the blame for him. She's a very good
sister. One of the best sisters you can get.
Oh, thank you. I wasn't a good sister in that
moment. No, what happened? Cracked. My mum compromised.
She said, you can pick your favourite three cars
and keep them. I was at 50! And my brother was
like, no, you're not. These are my cars. I'm
putting my foot down. And he's such a calm guy.
It's so out of character. And he's like, if you
lay hands on my cars again, I'm going to do something
bad. I'm going to say a naughty word. And my
dad was like, what naughty word will you say,
Bertie? And he was like, I can't say that now.
You have to wait and see. And he stormed off.
The cars were kept, and I still have most of
the cars. We've got rid of some of them now,
but we've still got about 20 out of the 50, and
they're still in our house. And I do remember
Nicky asked if my mum, like, did you donate the
cars? And my mum was like, no, you must have
dreamt that. Blimey, that. Blatant lying. Blatant
lying because of my brother's misbehaviour, even
though it was kind of my mum's fault, in my opinion.
Yeah, she should have asked. Parents should ask
you if they're going to give something of yours
away. Definitely. So that's a crazy story for
you. That is crazy. That's a crazy story. That
is one of the funniest stories I've ever heard.
That was so funny. Right, shall we get on to
the main... The main event. Yeah, the main event.
Why are we spending that? Too long, too long.
But it's fun. So, we're going to reveal our GCSE
results in just a tick. First of all, Evie. What?
You were looking at me. Do you think your...
By the way, GCSE, everyone knows what GCSEs are.
If you Americans don't know, get a life and Google
it. It's basically you guys' SATs before... They
don't know what that is, love. The end of elementary.
It's just some ridiculously hard exams you have
to do when you're 16 for no reason. It's stupid.
It's stupid. Anyway, Evie, what do you think
you would get on your GCSEs, going from maths
all the way to English? Just go to all subjects
that you do now. What do you think you would
get in a grade? Then start with maths. Maths.
I think history. I'm not going to take it, but
if I did, probably like a four or five. I'm not
very good at history. Geography, maybe like a
seven, maybe. Geography, maybe a six. Seven,
seven. You said seven. Once you've done your
GCSEs, we're going to... Yeah. Okay. From...
What other lessons do I do? German. German. Oh,
yes. I do German, not Spanish. German. I'm not
going to think of any languages because you don't
have to take one. Yeah. But if I did, I'd probably
get like a five. French, probably like a four.
I'm not very good at French. Drama. We don't
take it anymore. You're not allowed to take it
until GTSC is. I know. No comment. I know. It's
really unfair. They replaced it with English.
So now you've got, like, double... You have to
do English. No, like, in the timetable, you triple
English now. I got triple English because they
got rid of drama. Not good. If we saw the drama,
I'd probably get a six. Okay. Music, five, maybe.
I can see his frustration in his face. No, no,
music, I'm not even... Okay. English. For what?
For language? What about literature? What's the
difference? She's not there yet. Okay, never
mind. Yeah, let's just go with that. Sorry. Science.
Science. Biology, are we doing all three or are
we going for... All three. All three. All together
or separately? Separately. So, biology. What's
in biology? So, plants, cells, back then. Because
of Will, probably seven, eight. Because of Will
and his... What are the parts of the cells? You
must know them off by heart. Oh, that's good.
Mitochondria and cytoplasm and... Lovely. It's
quite hot in here. Poor curtain. Okay, what else
in physics? Electricity, you're talking about
components. Probably six, seven. Seven. Chemistry
is like, you know... Covalent bonds. Oh, like
five, six. I'm not very good at that type of
stuff. I think the thing I'm best at is biology.
In my science. Yeah, me too. William. Shut up.
I'm going to throw this at you if you say one
more negative thing with your eyebrows. Okay,
what else is there? No, no, computer science.
I would hope to get quite a high score in computer
science. I would hope to. Maybe like a seven
or an eight. Lovely. you do a lot of coding in
gcc's computing there don't you no idea i think
i think you have to do quite a lot of like python
and stuff like yeah yeah you'll get you gotta
like create an app or something like that yeah
uh what else is there is that it i think that's
everything you don't do pre oh p uh probably
like p y like a four you've also got business
and law You've also got DTA and tech styles.
What do you do for DTA? Making cakes, I think.
Well, there's cooking. You can take the cooking.
I think I'm quite a high -scoring cook. I like
cooking. Ending that conversation there. You
can't take a cooking GCSE. Yes, you can. You
can. You can take it. I think it's like an equivalent
qualification. Well, it's not equivalent, but
they say it's equivalent. No, no. It's not by
the GCSE people. You can take cooking. It's like
you've got a three, four -hour lesson. where
you've got to cook. No, it's not that easy, Will.
I'm like my master chef. You cook like a three
to five course meal. You do a lot of cooking
in GCSEs. Oh, food prep. Yeah. High school off
that. Yeah, that is a thing. Okay, DT. You also
have to do like the biology of the food. Yeah,
obviously. You've got DT. No, that's plants.
Glycogen. No, no. Sarge was right, Will. I don't
know, I'm forcing it all now. It's more like...
Nutrients and bacteria. Pathogens. That's what
I learned in year seven. And stuff like that.
But then you've got DT, which is like woodwork
and vectorizing. And like 2D design. What did
you get? Maybe a six or a seven. And then textiles.
I haven't done that yet, but it's the next step
of DT now. They've taken out vectorizing and
they're turning it into textiles. Yeah. And I'll
probably get like a five. Right, okay. Let's
reveal this. This is big, guys. This is it. We've
not told each other and it's so long ago since
we found out. I'm quite nervous, actually. This
is important because Jemima and I have grown
up so much through subjects. We used to have
maths with you. You're not supposed to say names
that are too far in there. We had maths with
that man and it was awful. It was horrendous.
We knew nothing. That's so bad. What, 5 % of
tests? Will you explain to me what the number
69 meant in maths? That's all I can remember
in year 7 maths. That's all I remember. Wow.
I mean, that's important, of course. But, yeah,
we've gone through a lot together, and we're
about to reveal... I'm going to cry. I can't.
Okay. Oh, I forgot to bring the papers. Well,
I'm just going to have to... I know them. Yeah,
she knows them. Right, okay. So let's start this
off. So for example, we're going to do like a
tallying system. A tally? Grab a pen. Oh, you've
got a pen, don't worry. Oh, I've got a pen. Yeah,
so write it. So Will, Jemima, and then you do
points. I've got to put my mic down, by the way.
So I won't be speaking very much. What? No, you
don't. You just put the pen and then just write
it with the other hand. You are the most criticising
person, Will. B. C, do I understand? Right, yeah,
right there, and then just put the score we get,
okay? So if it's a nine, it's a nine, and then
if it's a one, if it's a four, then it's a...
Well, that doesn't matter. No, it doesn't matter.
Okay, never mind. You just put, like, the letter
next to it. Okay. So, for example, music will
be compared to art. Okay, yeah, yeah. So we'll
do that. Okay, right. Should we start a maths?
Or should we leave maths? Leave maths, leave
maths. No, should we start... English language?
Yeah. Because I feel like none of us, not really
our jam. No, not at all. Right. Do you want me
to say? Yeah, you go. I'm happy with my English
language. I got a six. Really? Yeah. Really?
Good. I'm happy with. What is your English language?
Stupid example. The Welsh one. W. Whatever it
is. Yeah. Something like that one. You know which
one I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah. Horrendous.
You had to, like, like you got given a text.
Write an article based on the text you were given.
Really? We could just write an article on a statement.
I wish we could do that, but no. It's like be
pernickety. It was just a stupid example. They've
changed the example in school now. Good, good,
yeah. Right. Six. Yay! Yeah, but six. One paper
for English language, that's it. Oh, no, I did
two, but I got a six in both of them. Right,
yeah. So, yeah, we had this stupid thing. And
also, in my English language exam, there was
an interruption. We do it online for some stupid
reason. That's pretty weird. But the whole system
crashed. So, we got... So, yeah, we buggered
it up pretty much. So, what did you do? We had
to just reload it and then we carried on. We
got extra time. That must have been really stressful.
Yeah, it was. Like, that takes a toll on you
because that's, like, been stressful. It ruins
the flow. Yeah. But, yeah, I'll take it any day.
Definitely, because English is not my strong
suit. Yeah, me neither. Should we do lit while
we're here? Just get English done? I'm also surprised
with my English lit. Really? It was good. I hate
English literature. We do mice and men. Better
than we might do. Great Expectations, Charles
Dickens. Ah. Horrendous. Is it? So horrible.
Literature's... And we also do poems, and it's
not fun. For my literature, I'm happy with this
because I hate English. You've got a seven, so
I'll take that. Lovely. So did I. Yeah. Oh, my
gosh. We're going so far. We've got the same.
Yeah. I'll take that anyway. English, I hate
English so much. Me too. I'm so glad to get English
out of my life. Yeah. So that's out of the way.
I'm pleased. So I think we can move on. That's
enough said for English. Should we go to science?
So we did the same example for science, AQA.
did combine as well. Yes. So we're going to,
for combined you get like two grades. Yeah. It's
like less science. Did you guys get a mark for
each science, like biology, chemistry? Yeah,
but then they combine it all together. Okay.
So should we go with that? Have you got a separate
one? Should we just say what we got? Separate?
Like how we can do it? Should we just say the
final grade we got? Okay, yeah. Yeah? Yeah. You
don't want to do biology? Oh, we could. If you
want to. I don't know. Yeah? Yeah? Yeah, yeah,
yeah. For biology, I got... There's two papers.
I got a six in one paper and a seven in the other
paper. Great, yeah. Great, yeah. So do I not
make them or just one of them? One of them. Seven,
do the highest. Yeah, do the highest. Right,
you for bio. For biology, so in... But biology
is the... He's a bio kid. Yeah, biology is known
to be the easiest out of the sciences. So, yeah,
biology is cool. You're such a science guy. It
really is. Do you remember me in first form?
You were so bad. And then suddenly you just started.
You must have been. You were. You were like 43
% with me and everything. 30s and 20s, I remember.
And now look at you go. I mean it in the lightest
way I can. You are a nerd. I mean it nicely.
No. No. No, I mean it like... That's so disgusting.
Don't say that again. That sounds like a mum
that's a really geeky lady. Don't care what the
other kids say. You're an academic weapon. You're
going to make it big in your life. Physics. Let's
do physics. Physics was rough. The first paper
I found very hard. People said this. Did you
not find it hard? I found the first paper really
hard. I got lower in paper one. one and a six
in paper two, which for physics and me is very,
I'm not a science. No, no, no, no, no. Take,
take that. Yeah. Physics is, physics is hard.
Yeah. Physics is really hard. Bet you got, well,
you're good at science. I got a nine and a nine.
Shut up. Yeah. Wait, how did you get a lower
score in the first one than the second one? Because
like marks wise. Yeah. Okay. But yeah, no, I
don't know how to be honest, but I'll take that.
Physics is, physics is hard. I'm so happy I didn't
take that. What's a nine? You got the highest
score. What do you mean? Like, yeah, yeah. Yeah,
but if you take it for A -level, you're pooping
your pants. There's apparently something like
antimatter and photons. In my brother's year,
a lot of his friends took physics A -level and
they all came out crying. Even the teenage boys,
the 18 -year -old boys came out crying of the
physics A -level. What? That's crazy. That is
crazy. Chemistry. Chemistry. the bane of my existence.
My least favorite thing in the entire world is
chemistry, but I didn't do too bad. Good. My
teacher was really happy. Good. In paper one,
I got a six. Yeah. And in paper two, I got a
five, but I was only one mark off a six. Yeah.
So, can't grumble. Are you not going to appeal?
I don't care about science that much. Besides,
it wouldn't have changed my final grade because
of how it, like, you know what I mean. Yeah.
So, what'd you get? Chemistry? I like chemistry.
Chemistry's my favorite. So we already know what
you've got. Yeah, 9 -9. Yeah, 9 -9. 9 -9, yeah.
Very respectable. Yeah, and in chemistry paper
two, I only got seven marks off. Shut up. Shut
up. Paper two was so easy. Paper two was easy.
I remember messaging you. Like, for me, that
tells you that paper was easy because I'm so
bad at chemistry. I can't show enough how bad
at chemistry I am. I didn't... know what a molecule
was until the week of the first chemistry exam.
Wow. But that's a pretty respectable result for
that. Yeah, no, definitely. So then, in total,
I got 5 -6 in science, and that's all I needed.
You have to... I bet you DJ Hips didn't get that.
No. And, well, you got 9 -9. That's not really...
Yeah, 9 -9. Which I was really happy with. Even
when I got my results, I didn't actually... I
wasn't able to grab my result before my chemistry
teacher came up to me and told me my result.
Oh. So he spoiled it for me, but it was fine.
That's fine. It was fine. Yeah. So that's that.
I'm really happy. I love that. Well done. Thank
you. Well done. Right. Where should we move?
Should we do, let's do drama. Drama. Yeah. And
I'll do business. Business, yeah. Business? Oh,
my gosh. It's not like business. I don't like
business. Last year, I wanted to take business
A -level, history A -level, not sciences, not
chemistry, biology. No, you told me like... Politics,
history, and business. That was it. And I wanted
to be a business entrepreneur and all that, make
money. Last year for my mock, I got grade 6.
I dropped off, so I got a 9, then I got a 6.
I dropped off, and this time of the year, my
business... exam was at the same time as my history
exam for both of them and I was just like so
I focus on history but out of the blue and this
one shocked me the most I got a nine in business
I know well done I know I know that that shocked
me because you were talking to me like you were
gonna you were saying to me like I'm gonna get
a four in business you kept saying that yeah
I didn't I was not living loving business in
the end but out of the blue yeah I'll take that
anyway yeah a drama I wanted a nine No, no, no.
I got an eight. I'm not happy with an eight.
It's probably going to get remarked. Because
I'm only four marks off. My teacher is reviewing
my paper this week. But I'm probably going to
send it off because he's already said. Because
for my coursework, I got a nine. So if I'm only
four marks off, it will be quite easy to bump
it up in drama. So hopefully I can update as
of a few weeks time. Hopefully it will be a nine.
But as of right now, it's an eight. But that
exam board is known for downmarking people in
drama. My whole class was one grade lower than
predicted. Really? So a lot has been remarked.
So I'm not too mad about it because I have a
feeling it could go up, if you know what I mean.
Yeah, you definitely deserve a nine in drama.
Great drama. What do you do in drama? You've
got to do like... have to come up with a 30 minute
piece of drama from that. Like a play kind of
thing, yeah. Like five of you, four of you in
a group. And then you do one monologue which
you have the script for and you just learn and
perform. And then one duologue you have the script
for. That would be horrible. That's what drama
A -levels are like. Is it really? It's hard.
It's hard. But A will be fine. I mean, I understand
it, so it's fine. Let's do PRA. I'll do geography.
I'm happy about this. It's been remarked. It
was an A, but it's now a 9. Yay! There's only
one mark off a nine. And my teacher looked at
my paper and she was like, yeah, easy. They've
undermarked you. They were like, yeah, she was
like, easy. So I've got a nine. Great. Yeah.
Can't be happier with that because it's such
a time -pressured exam as well. Yeah. Good one.
Please. Yeah, PRA is hard. There's a lot of hand
cramps. So photography. And nine in paper, one.
And then eight in paper, two. And then eight
in coursework. So overall, eight. So I'll take
that. Geography, it's known for having tough
grade boundaries. But it's known for being quite
easy. But yeah, so yeah. Very good. Right. I
want to lean towards maths. Yeah, let's do maths.
Our journey. They made me do foundation maths.
I didn't want to. You can only get five. That's
the top grade you can get. I could have done
higher. You know me, I'm quite pessimistic. I
wouldn't say that if I could. I could have done
higher. I think I could have got a six. But,
no, I did foundation. You did higher. I did do
higher. I got a five. Yay! And I only dropped
14 marks across the two papers. So, can't complain
with that. Should have done higher, but, you
know. Oh, well. Well, a pass in maths. It's over.
It's over. Maths is gone. Thank you. So, in maths,
I am completely shocked. And I just want to thank
my maths teacher this year, the GOAT. Not my
tutor. My maths teacher. Oh, your tutor. I know
who your tutor is, actually. I don't know who
is your teacher. James. He's a goat. He's so
good. So, in total, I got seven in maths. I'm
really happy. After the journey of maths. After
the journey. It never felt like it was possible.
Ever since back in the... is a handshake of many
years. I'm going to cry. Since year six when
we sat together in March. That's when we probably
became closest because of maths. Yeah. So, thank
you. We might not have been here without maths.
I'm going to cry. I'm going to cry. I'm going
to cry. Wow. Wow. Yeah, let's move to music.
Music. Right. Do you ever hear music? No, I don't.
Shame. What has happened here then? Because you
were hinting at, you know, a catastrophic It's
not catastrophic, but I'm gutted. I didn't get
a four, but I'm gutted. Yeah, obviously I didn't
get a four. I got a nine in my coursework. I
only dropped two marks across the whole thing.
Full marks in performance, two marks dropped
in composition. What more can you want, really?
No one gets full marks in composition. Two marks
dropped is, everyone gets that. For the highest,
so you know. The paper, I thought... say was
good. I thought I answered the questions correctly.
I knew the cadences. I knew the keys. I was locked
in. Got the paper back and it says I got a seven.
Well, that's not bad. I know, but I was predicted
a nine for the whole two years. I've been getting
nines in every single paper I've been doing.
I've got a nine in the mock. I've got a nine
in every single paper. My teacher looked at my
paper and he was like, this is ridiculous. They've
undermarked you by far. There's so many things
I would give marks for. We sent it back, still
a seven. And I was only one mark off an eight
and they haven't even bumped me up one mark.
So I'm, yeah. That's it. I know a seven isn't
bad. No, it's not bad at all. In something that
I was predicted a nine, it is gutting. That is
gutting. Oh, I'm really sorry. Because you're
very damn good at music. And that. They've switched
the exam board now because there's a guy in my
music class who is like insane. I've never met
someone so musical in my entire life. And he
got a seven as well. Really? The whole of my
class was down two grades. That's terrible. Maybe
it was the teaching. I don't know. Our teacher's
not great. But the thing is, we're all not stupid
people. No. So we did the revision. Anyway, gutting,
but it is what it is. I'm really sorry about
that. It's all right. I don't know if I've already
told you this. I got this back ages ago before
the result thing. I got a six in art, which I'm
taking anyway. Yeah, you didn't vibe well in
the end, did you? Art was a horrible, horrible
subject. So much work to do, and it messed with
all your other revision. You had to spend so
much time into doing this book, cutting and painting.
Especially when you're not very good at it, and
then your teacher comes on and goes, uh -oh,
wow, this is shit, in so many words. That's really
encouraging. Our old tutor, that one. Oh. I remember
she told you off for sleeping in tutor once.
What? And you were like, I was awake till 4 a
.m. And she was like, why were you awake till
4 a .m.? And you were like, just watching Fortnite.
I know Will used to sleep in lessons. He used
to sleep in learning support with me. He used
to be fast asleep. For people who are a bit slow
in their heads. It's a separate lesson, but you're
helping them. They teach you how to write and
read. This is the last one, isn't it? History.
Yeah. Now, as we know, my history mark went awful.
Yeah. What did you get? Four. Four to five? I
didn't know it was four. It was four in one paper,
five in the other. But I count out four, because
I shouldn't have got a five in that one paper.
That was pure luck. Yeah. History, that's been
worse than chemistry. What? So many tears over
history. I used to be so good at it, but the
GCSE took it out of me. It was so hard. I used
to be the opposite. It was so hard. We did some
of the same stuff, but then I had to do the stupid...
I had to do the stupid... It's a serious issue,
but it should not be taught because people...
It's still not solved. The Middle East crisis
that's going on right now is still to this day.
What? They make GCSE students struggle, and they're
writing about all the different conflicts, and
that was the hardest thing I've ever done in
my life. Yeah. Because you have to be so unbiased
as well. Really? Because it's going on now. So
you have to be careful. I did Britain instead
from like... Just after the war. It's way better.
Why don't we do that? Have we done Napoleon?
No. Napoleon. But it was not... Britain was boring
because you have so many acts, like acts of...
The act of the rhythm. The Beaumont Society.
Helped protect trans rights. I always remember
that. Quite recently. 1960. Yeah, it was quite
recent, but Jemima's was more recent. So, yeah,
but we did USA. Yeah, we did. Cold War. USSR.
Russia. USSR, yeah. I quite liked Russia. That
was my favourite bit. Yeah, definitely. Okay.
You go first. Because you usually do well in
history. Yeah, I mean. Not back in the day. You
remember first form with the biscuit? You were
worse than me. Yes, much, much worse. And then
second form, I did okay, and then I picked it
up slightly. Paper one went terrible because
I missed out a question. Which question? Coalitions.
Oh, it was an eight marker. It was really hard.
I wrote a load of crap. Absolute crap. It was
really hard. Yeah, it was rich. And then, but
the rest of the paper, I think, went quite well.
Yeah. And then Paper 2 went really well. Yeah.
Everyone hated Paper 2, but I loved it. I thought
it was really good. My whole school hated Paper
2, but I loved it. You were saying it was a bit
weird. It whipped out about women. Yes. I didn't
really focus my revision on women. I was lucky
I crammed it the night before. Oh, my gosh. I
was lucky with that. Yeah. But overall, I got
a 9, so I will take that. 13 marks and considering
i missed that question the eight mark so i'll
take that definitely yes it's a bit of a shock
i got an eight really i got an eight that was
all thanks to my brother's tuition my brother
is a history guy he did history a level he could
have done it at uni So, yeah, he coached me through
and I got an A, which I'm exhilarated with because
it could have gone so wrong. It really could
have. I could have failed. There was a point
where it really looked like I could fail. That's
true. We pulled through. Wow, I'm really pleased.
We've done really well. We've done great. We've
done really well compared to a lot of people
who I've been hearing their results and I'm like...
Did you revise or what, mate? Someone... got
a 4 in Classics, which he was going to take for
A -Level, so he couldn't take it for A -Level,
and then he didn't get a high enough mark for
Maths, so he couldn't take that for A -Level,
so he didn't come to the school in the end. Oh,
he's left! Oh, that's really sad. So, tough,
tough for him. Tough crowd. Yeah, but I think
we've done great. We've done really well. Let's
handshake it for the third time. Okay, right,
well, these are scores. Yep. I think if you have
a look at it, you'll see you've got the higher.
But then again, you did do really well, Jemima.
Oh, okay. SP, does that mean science, physics?
Yeah. Sorry, I put S down first. That's okay.
Right, okay. I look at here. So if you look at
English language, 6 -6. So we're equal. We're
1 -1 at the moment. Then English fit, 7 -7. It's
2 -2. Then we get to physics, 6 -9. I'd taken
it 3 -2. And then biology, 9. So 4 -2. And then
chemistry, 5 -2. But now we... Drama. Drama.
Drama. Drama and biology. Drama, maybe. Remark,
right? Yeah. Hopefully a 9. Hopefully. But we
don't know. And then I had business. That was
it. And that was a 9. So it's like 6 -6 -2 at
the moment. But then, PRE, 9. Pulling through.
Lovely. Maths, five. Maths, seven. So, seven.
Seven, three. And then music, seven. Art, six.
That's... Seven, four. Seven, four. And then
history, eight. And history, nine. But I think
that history, eight, is more like history, nine,
from where you came from. So, I'd say that's
another... I'd say that's a draw. So, eight.
But overall, we've done great. We've both done
really well. It's just the sciences that boost
up the score. It is like... I'm not a science
gal. I've never been a science gal. No, if you
look at the scores, they're pretty much equal,
except the sciences. Like, PRE, better. Maths,
except maths. But music, in history, equal, pretty
much. But the math wasn't your fault, though,
because you weren't allowed to... Maths, I couldn't
get any higher than a five, yeah. Yeah, exactly.
So, Jemima did the best she could. So, technically,
what score was your maths, Jemima? Seven. Technically,
Jemima got higher than your maths. Because she
got the highest mark she could. Yeah. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah. That's true. It is an easier
paper. Yeah. Oh, well. We've done well. We've
done great. We've done really well. GCSEs, the
torment is over. They're done. Now on to A -levels.
Harder? Yeah, yeah, definitely. You guys make
it seem so, like, terrifying and so traumatising.
It's a lot of work. It's a lot of work. If you
don't work hard, then you don't go through it
as much. But if you care, we cared. Yeah. We
wanted to do well. Then it is a lot. It's a lot.
That's crazy. Yeah. That's mad. I didn't want
to help you anyway. Text up. Sorry, I'm joking.
That was a joke. That was a joke. That was a
joke. Of course I would help you with your sciences
and everything else. Yeah, yeah. I mean, I wasn't
great at English. Anyway, I think that's a great
way to end. That's a great wrap. Yeah, thank
you guys for listening. I hope you enjoyed our
GCSE results. That's it. Thank you. We'll see
you guys in episode four. We've got a lot coming
up in that episode. Remember to check out the
Halloween episode that's going to come at the
end of October. October. Don't remember.