Now for the answers I got, we'll start with Hal.
It's call and response.
Well, you got to start it off then if I'm responding.
Country roads.
Nice.
Take me home to the place I belong.
We can't sing too much, we'll get copyright.
Virginia, to mama.
That's where I'm from, you know.
Take me home.
Oh, that's cool.
Eli's home.
Eli's roads.
That's my best answer I've ever given.
Oh.
Hello, law criminals, and welcome to the next episode of the Pub Quiz.
I am Hal, joined by my illustrious companions.
I have Eli, Colin, and Andy, and today we'll be tackling the Lumineth.
Yeah.
Someone please help me here.
Yeah.
Yeah, excitement.
Yeah.
That's cool.
Woo, baby.
Oh, god, we're going to get deep terribly.
Yuck.
Ugh.
This is bad.
As people who watch the quizzes know, I don't have the best track record at winning.
And I was faced with two choices.
I could either research more of the lore, make sure I'm prepared for the topic ahead,
or I could just make everyone else suffer.
So I went with the latter option.
So it's time for an Age of Sigmar quiz.
How about we'll just start with the...
Hal, what's your knowledge on Age of Sigmar?
You know damn well what my knowledge of Age of Sigmar is.
How dare you ask that?
Well, as I...
Well, you know it's bad.
No, it's just they're like, how dare you?
How dare you?
Pain.
That's my last statement, pain.
Eli, how are you feeling?
Uh, I don't know, I hate elves.
That's, no comment.
Minus points.
All right, all right.
Eli starts off with negative 10 points.
And Andy, how are you feeling today?
Well, because I know nothing about this subject.
Not just Lumeneth, but also Age of Sigmar.
I watched your video on your channel about this.
So if I do terribly, it's your fault.
That's a really good answer.
Uh, as a rebuttal, uh, it's your fault for coming to me for lore.
That's an even better answer.
Wow.
God, this is bad.
This is a great start.
Now to be fair, there's some, uh, the easy section, some of it won't be too hard to figure
out.
It's, uh, a lot of it is, or one of the questions you can probably just guess your way through
with minimal knowledge of even Warhammer.
And another one is just some pretty basic fantasy knowledge.
So is, uh, is everyone ready to go?
Yes, sir.
Oh Lord.
Ready as I'll ever be.
I'm hoping for some very fun answers today.
Bend us over in a video game brackets.
In a video game that doesn't count.
Oh, moving on, moving on.
So easy section.
We'll start, we'll start simple.
Who are the Elven heroes from Warhammer fantasy who became the twin gods of the Luminath Rome
Lords?
Oh, thank God.
They were two mortals, two mortal elves from Warhammer fantasy.
And now they're the two gods of the Luminath.
This is a lifeline.
Andy, you, you, you must like even, you watched the video.
If you were watching me briefly play Warhammer earlier, one of them flashed on screen after
I ended one of my turns.
I mean, the only thing is, I know knowledge, but I just don't know where any of, it's,
it's like, it's like someone going, okay, recreate this painting with all these colors
and you're going, what are colors?
So you don't know how they correlate.
So that's the best I've given my answer.
That's the best I can do.
By the way, I think we have to say one of them is definitely Jason Statham and the other
one is definitely Stallone.
Because he's not very elvish.
No, no, one of them is definitely, you know, Statham and he's like, you're on mate.
And then I wonder if you're like, oh man, he's definitely Stallone.
Leave Rambo alone.
I love Rocky.
Okay.
But let's be honest.
One of them definitely, it'd be funnier if he sounded like that.
I don't want to give it away.
Can I admit to a sin?
The luminous just goes, it's not about how hard you can hit.
It's about how hard you can get hit and keep moving forward.
That's how a winner is done.
And then just like an orc going, wow.
In his face.
Oh my god.
My sin hells, I've never seen Rocky.
Stop it.
What's wrong with you, bruh?
Don't tell me you've seen like Rocky 3 or something.
Like you've seen one of the later ones and never seen the first one.
No, I've just never seen any of them.
No.
I've seen clips.
I've seen Rocky fighting.
People in the chat right now.
What's his face?
Roast this man.
That is appalling.
Even mate, I'm on the other side of the pond and I've seen that film.
Listen, I've seen the big fight from the movie.
That's all I need.
The big fight?
Which one?
I'd like to move on now.
Next question.
Everyone sent me their answers.
Let's move on.
Jesus Christ.
Before I humiliate myself anymore on the internet.
What civilization of the world that was Old War Hammer Fantasy were Tyrion and Teclis
trying to recreate with Illuminath?
You can give me their fancy.
You can give me their fancy elf speak name or just the fantasy race that they are.
Sorry, what was that question?
The question is with the Illuminath Realm Lords, Tyrion and Teclis were trying to recreate
the race of elves they belong to in War Hammer Fantasy.
What race of elves is that?
If you know the fancy War Hammer name, that's great, if you just know the basic fantasy,
the elf race, that's good too.
Wait, is it like the equivalent of Eldar from 40k but their version of saying elf or is
it like a special name?
It's not that special.
You can use the special name but if you just want to use a D&D name for elves, there's
your hint.
Oh no.
I'm going to guess.
The certain race of elves.
I'm going to guess.
Conservatives.
This is the only section I might get a point or two so I'm trying really hard for now.
Think back.
What's the nickname of conservatives in the US?
We call them Tories here because I can't put Tory elves.
I don't know if they have a nickname.
Not a nickname I'm just saying.
Not that we judge anyone but it might be appropriate, let's just say.
I can't put Tory elves for the UK listeners there, that might be funny.
Eli must be smoking this because he's just holding all his cards.
I'm just chilling.
Oh no, oh god, we're about to get crushed.
When Eli is quiet in the corner because he's writing the answers and just being smug, just
going yeah I know this one.
Everyone's answers are in and now we're moving past Warhammer fantasy.
This is just pure AOS now.
What is the realm within which the Luminath live and hold domain over?
Oh no.
Oh lord.
You can give me the fancy realm name or just the realm of blank.
Oh realm of blank, that's helpful.
We put the answer for this in the last one so I'll just put the other one that I know
it's called.
I got number two wrong, whoops.
This answer's not going to be clean by the way, not clean.
Eli, an answer from Andy and I, okay, and an answer from Al.
Be merciful.
My elven god, please.
He's amazing.
I'm thinking he's 100% bribes.
Not even in moral terms, he's not a good person.
No, he's not moral.
He's a god of war, he's as moral for his position as he needs to be.
Just needs his creatine and a sword and he's fine.
Exactly.
I'm just rubbing my metaphorical hands of Cato Sicarius in the background.
That could have gone very seismically.
No escape from the ultramarines.
Mine is Calguard too.
I'd like to announce happily everyone got the first question right.
The elven heroes from fantasy of the twin gods, Tyrion and Teclis.
Good job everyone.
The next question, what race were they trying to recreate?
Hal, you gave me the high elves, that's correct.
Eli, you also gave me the high elves, that was correct, and Andy gave me high-ish.
No.
No, you didn't.
Because when you said the question, I thought they would have a proper name that wasn't
just elves who are very-
Oh, I see what you were thinking.
The proper name for the high elves in fantasy was the Asur.
I watched the- yeah.
That's why I said is it like 40k with the Eldar and they're just as silly as saying
elves to get rid of the trademark problems.
Wait, you're telling me it's not Eldar 420 blaze it with the Kush elves?
Believe it or not, no.
It's not those guys.
That's the Darkhold dark.
They're not included.
Oh, they're worse than that.
They're like meth on the street.
Olux.
Rancid.
Wilden out a DMT.
No, PCP, that's what I was thinking of.
Are you telling me that the Dark Eldar like perpetually listened to the Jo Rogan experience
or something like that?
What a weird image that is.
Yeah, they're listening to him and Dagoth Ur.
Oh, that was so good.
This probably dates this really old, but we don't care.
Yeah, it's gonna date this.
It's gonna date this.
People are like, oh, you know-
Everything is a product of its time.
Grandad, what's Dagoth Ur?
Let me tell you, kid, the sense of humor back then was elite.
You had to be there.
It was stupid.
It's always gonna be stupid.
And for the third question, we'll start with Hal, a Heish realm of light, Ossie.
I'll give you that one.
Heish or the realm of light.
Ossie.
Eli with realm of light, probably.
I'll give you that one.
And Andy also with realm of light.
Hey.
So that'll be three points for Eli and Hal.
Andy, still with two.
Not far behind.
That's pretty good.
We're doing well, boys.
Yeah, and it's just hearing these Elven words and trying to say what means what.
Because again, I don't even know what it looks like.
I just watched your video and I remember he said something called Heish and there was
a man called Tyrion and that's pretty much it.
So that's more or less all the knowledge I absorbed from your very informative video.
It's even ready to take my bronze medal and leave now.
My very informative video where five minutes of it was on ironic Elven propaganda.
I am proud of that beyond any other.
I didn't take any more information in to be honest.
I literally like had a moment of like five minutes going, oh, what?
What did I can't be bothered to rewind.
I started going into conniptions.
It's quite amazing you get Andy to be involved in so much Elven propaganda because this man
despises Elves if anyone didn't know yet.
If anyone saw him at that point, it would have been frothing at the mouth.
It's more like in a catatonic state just kind of slumped over.
Just going, I don't feel well.
Rubbish law.
Yeah, take that column.
Elder intolerant.
I don't need to take it because he'll be taking the L.
Oh, the L.
The Elves.
Losers.
I'm going to fight you.
Thanks everyone.
I'll be here a week.
There will be bloodshed.
And Eli has given me a fourth answer.
Oh no.
Walfric Stormcloak screaming, I hate the Elf Mary domain.
Surrounded by Thalmor justicards.
Oh my Lord.
What's the guy's name who's the Talos worshipper in the middle of Whiterun?
Oh, Talos.
He's like that.
Black Soul Gem fuel.
That's his name.
He loves you.
He loves the Empire.
Stealth Archer trick shot practice.
Everyone's relating to that right now.
360 no scope.
Heimskar?
I don't know where you're going with that.
Sounds right.
Moving on from that annoying guy.
We go to the medium section.
Is everyone ready?
Hit us.
I'm too into it.
What god did Teclis defeat with the help of several human magical war machines?
It was Teclis and another god were squaring up.
And if you'd like a hint, would the fellas like a hint?
I think I'm okay actually.
They might want it.
I'm guessing but I...
Eli? Andy? How are you feeling?
Suffering.
Whatever. I'll probably get it wrong anyway.
Go for it, why not?
The hint is...
God damn it, hell.
You're welcome.
We've spoken about him before.
I did wonder.
If that's the hint, I think it is.
That's like dip your tea bag in or essence of tea bag.
That's barely a hint.
Lord.
What?
There's a thing where in Britain, obviously we like our tea.
Some people have it really weak.
I'm drinking one right now.
They just dip their tea bag in or even worse, heresy.
Someone will pour the hot milk in first.
Don't even say it.
I'm annoyed that you say that.
You never had milk in green tea?
It's not the same.
You don't put it in the first.
You don't put milk in then the tea.
That's disgusting.
People do that.
That's ridiculous.
That's like milk then cereal.
That's not how it works.
I knew someone who put the hot water and then the milk in immediately.
Put like a half a cup of milk in.
I don't want to talk about it because I'm annoyed.
The thing is, I don't remember exactly which university it was,
but it might have been Stanford or something.
They did an experiment to see how to perfectly brew a cup of tea.
You put the tea bag in, you pour the hot water and you leave it for 30 seconds.
Then you take the tea bag out, then you put in the sweetener,
then you put a certain amount of milk.
It's like, yeah, there's a science to it.
We've got it covered in the UK.
We've got to treat it properly.
Leave it alone, people.
Stop ruining it.
Stop putting the milk in first.
Me and Hal will knock on your door and be like, what are you up to?
Day in the life of a true tea abuser.
I don't want to say it.
I don't have a license for that milk.
Christ.
As you can tell, we're very into it.
We're very serious about our tea here at Lorca.
How do you use the sweetener?
This is a true test.
Or honey.
What, or honey?
Good to be good.
I don't really use sweetener with tea, honestly.
I use stevia because I'm pretentious.
I just raw dog the tea.
Stop it.
I just imagine you rubbing tea bags on yourself.
I'm going to buy you some mouthwash.
Please stop.
And to buy you mouthwash so you can clean out your mouth after those tea cups.
Defending a nation.
I'll dump that tea in the fucking harbor.
Go ahead.
That's a good point, T-Fair.
I'm not from the UK, sir.
Fair enough.
That's directed squarely at Hallett this week.
It's such a damn waste as well.
They could have just burned it.
That wouldn't have been funny.
It would have been the same difference.
It would have been no tea either way.
More imagery.
Fish out some tea.
They're already, they're flavored enough.
They have to fish out all the bags after.
It's probably just degraded by this point.
It's not like nowadays where it's 80% microplastics.
It's just paper.
I didn't even know about the Boston Tea.
They don't call it the party.
They call it the Boston Tea Massacre.
The Boston Tea Party.
Boston Tea Party.
I didn't know about that as like a teenager, I think.
Because I didn't come up much in school.
I'm not going to lie.
I didn't hear about it until I was in my 20s.
And part of that was because of the music Hamilton.
It's not a big event in British history.
It's not a big event.
Sorry, sorry boys.
It's not a big event.
If you're in Britain, you get taught about Rome.
You get taught about World War II.
World War I too.
World War I, Henry VIII, English Civil War.
Not much in the English Civil War to be honest.
And then Cromwell and all that stuff.
I'd love to go to Andy's History Club.
I'd love to go to Andy's History Class.
That's just Rome and then skips to World War II.
We did do World War I.
But it was literally like Trenchfoot.
And then we moved on.
Yikes.
Let's move on from Passchendaele, shall we?
Forget that happened.
Speaking of moving on.
Medium question number two.
What hero of the High Elves was reformed, not as a Luminoth Realm Lord as an Elf, but as an Anime?
As an Elf, but as an Animated Suit of Armor?
So this is another fella from Warhammer Fantasy.
He came back, but because of what happened to him in the end times, he couldn't get a body.
It would just age to dust.
So he just got put in a suit of armor, like Fullmetal Alchemist.
What's the kids name?
His brother from Fullmetal Alchemist?
There's a...
The one who's in the armor?
Edward Elric.
No!
His brother.
Elphonse.
God, it's been a hot minute since I've seen that show.
That was good.
Wasn't there like two seasons of that?
Like one of them was like a reading?
I'm still not right there.
I've got Eli's answer.
And I've got Andy's answer.
Are they not serious at all?
Oh lord.
Or would you say such a thing, Hal? Why?
I wouldn't accuse you of that.
We're completely serious here at LoreCrimes.
To see our discussion about T.
Yes. T-O-C.
T is very... There it is.
Yep. Yep. That's the level.
Now, here's the part where the medium kind of blends in with the hard.
Because I was trying to think of what a good medium section would be.
And...
We'll see how easy or hard it is.
What god is Tyrion
proeing the borders of with his forces?
So Tyrion is taking his forces
and going to another realm to test the borders,
test the waters as it were,
of the defenses of this god.
Wait...
Is it a different answer from the first god?
It is in fact a different answer from the first god.
Oh, that's tricky.
This is another returning elf from fantasy.
Oh, you can't...
Oh wait, no, it's spelled differently now, isn't it?
Or could we use the old spelling?
I mean, I only use...
I think we can give a hint to Andy here.
This person has also appeared in Marvel, technically.
I was going to say, don't, there's no point.
And Eli has deducted 10,000 points for cringe.
Get him, he's got cringe.
For being objectively wrong
about the Phoenix King lineage.
Well, actually...
Andy, if you've ever watched one of some of the earlier Marvel films...
Thor of the Dark World.
No, that's too good, that's too much of a hint.
Have you seen Thor of the Dark World then?
I don't think he's seen Thor of the Dark World from the answer.
We know Colin hasn't seen it.
Like once, maybe twice.
I've not seen Thor of the Dark World.
Wait, you have or you haven't?
I have not, and I don't feel bad about missing out on that one.
I've never seen Thor of the Dark World.
Wait, you have or you haven't?
I have not, and I don't feel bad about missing out on that one.
You didn't miss much.
That was pretty mid.
That's probably the most...
If I had to define mid, I'd probably put that film there.
I know it's usually ranked as possibly the worst film
alongside the original Incredible Hulk.
It's like those two are just naff.
I always forget the Hulk had his own movie.
Yeah, everyone does, because it was...
Ed Norton and someone else before him.
Fun fact about that film, they had Hicks and Gracie from Brazilian Jiu Jitsu fame,
who was the one who was doing all the crazy breathing stuff with his belly.
That's just because I do Jiu Jitsu a little bit.
I was like, oh, it's Hicks and Gracie. That's cool.
Oh, he smacked the Hulk in the face. That's cool.
I haven't seen that film for like 10 years.
I don't think anyone missed...
Remember when the first Avengers came out?
Was everyone like, oh, yeah.
Oh, and the Hulk's here?
Oh, that's the... I don't think I was until I...
Hulk was cool in the first movie.
I didn't think I was like, oh, I need to see the Hulk.
But he's actually pretty good in that film.
In the Avengers, it was like, oh my God, that's the Hulk.
He should get his own movie because no one knew he had his own movie.
Other than She-Hulk, I guess.
But I haven't seen that.
I haven't seen that. Oh, that's not a surprise.
I should have put my joke answers to be fair.
Well, you'll have plenty of room for joke answers coming soon.
I can feel it. I can feel it definitely.
I'm like, oh...
Join us in the meme answers. Join us. Join me, Eli.
But first, the medium answers and the scores.
So what God did Teclis defeat with the help of several human war machines?
Nagash! Everyone got that right.
Yes!
We are actually competent at the high alve quiz.
Sorry, high ales.
I almost got thrown off because you were like, didn't you say which God?
And I was like, I mean, he's strong.
Does he count as a God?
And then I was like, he's the only person I can think of from your video who they're like.
And then he smacked Nagash in the face and was like, stop it.
So I just took a leap of faith.
Such is the power of Nagash.
Such a whore.
Yes.
I didn't like that, but it's like come full circle and it's now it's baller.
I have to say.
It's come back and it's good now.
So we're going to keep using that as a reference.
Love that quote so much.
But yeah, everyone ever got it right.
See, it's doing all right so far.
Can you read out my other part of my answer too?
Because I don't want that to be missed.
He put Nagash and then slash Nazim.
No!
You heard of that.
Do you go to the Nehekeren district very often?
Oh, what am I saying?
Of course you don't.
And he's like that high off Nazim.
Oh man, that's right.
That's our funny eclipse.
He's in my mind.
That is one of our funniest clips though.
That Nazim.
How long do we talk about Nazim on that video for like a good five, ten minutes?
I'm still greatly offended you would compare anyone to Nazim.
That's crime.
I only have a pointy-pointy, you know, look how cool I am and I'm like looking down my nose at you kind of person.
That's what elves do. They just, you know.
They usually earn it and Nazim's just a prick.
Even when they're not trying, you know.
Hiking, this is not the time to be short.
Short? What?
They do it by accident. They're just so, you know, snooty.
Y'all Balgroff knew to smack him away.
Do any of you like know that the, because I love the trailer for Turtle Warhammer 3, even though I have not played it.
The Hiking is voiced by the dad from, the guy who does the voice for the dad in Peppa Pig.
So that's quite fun.
You're what?
Nice.
What?
So I heard his voice and I was like, hang on a minute.
I was like, oh, he's like, hello.
I'm the guy from Peppa Pig. I was like, yes, I was correct.
Yo Andy, you, you, you like a big fan of Peppa Pig?
Like is that like a...
But I haven't used it and I've seen it once or twice.
That's fair. That's fair.
Sorry, I just like, I blew my mind.
You know that reference there.
And Eli has sent yet another banger.
No.
When a starving elf child asks me for food.
And a courtroom with sunglasses saying...
Eli why? Eli why?
Thorgrim and Vulcan would be very good friends.
They're just like an elder child.
It was good though, as soon as you said Eli's aunt, so I had the sirens outside.
At least we can all say, no matter where you come from, no matter who you are,
everybody in the world is united by their hatred of...
They're united by their hatred of Nazeem.
So that's a unifying thing that we can all agree on.
The next answer though, what is the name of the high elf that was reforged as a suit of armor?
We got Hal with Eltharion, that is correct.
Bad spelling.
Eli with Imrik or the guy who stands on the wall and puts people in jail.
Give me point 25, point 0, please bro, please.
Well I got it right, I got it right.
I think I'm willing to give you half a point for having the...
You knew what he was all about in Warhammer Fence, you named the wrong guy.
So a half point.
And then Andy bringing up the rear with Percival long stockings.
The traditional elven name.
Oh my lord.
Cope, seed and furthermore mold.
And then the last answer, which was, what is the name...
Oh wait, no.
I don't goof, pardon me.
What is the name of the god who Tyrion has been investigating and scouting the borders of?
Hal gave me Malekith, Eli gave me Malekith, and then more of an answer that I don't want to read so I'm not going to.
You have to do it, you have to do it. For the viewers.
I think I'll let Eli read out this answer.
Fine. It's Malekith, the real phoenix king, on G for real, for real, 100 to 100.
Oh no wonder you don't want to read it.
High treason, in a bar, his phoenix king, rightful phoenix king, Malekith is pretender.
Doesn't he get clapped though, pretty early on in the end times?
Don't worry about it.
He asks, with Teclis, don't him and Teclis like wash the end of the world together and say I think you'll be a whiff-rash now?
He also becomes the phoenix king in the end times, I'm pretty sure.
That was the end times, Lord, it doesn't count, it sucks.
It does, and that's why you hate it.
Correct.
It's some kind of Eldar joke, I'm too human to understand.
They're elves now, please.
He's got them there.
They all look the same to me.
Oh my limit.
Elfism is not something we stand by in war crimes.
I'm outraged.
You're nine fears.
But no, it was Malekith, Tyrion and Elariel watching the world blow up.
Teclis got manfritted by the property.
I like that part of For the Dark World, that was pretty good to see.
Where Malekith gets Manfred von Karstein all over the place.
He Manfred von Karstein all over the setting.
Which is fair, it's the most appropriate use of that term.
He really did.
Manfred the needle.
And then for Andy's answer, coming in strong with Baldur's Yawning Gate.
You said a god, I was like, oh, Baldur was in For Love and Thunder.
He's a god, I can't be bothered.
Wrong Thor movie, but you were on a trail.
It was a great trail, but it was a trail.
Whilst we're on Thor movies, why was that one not as good as the one before it?
Love and Thunder was not as good as...
What was the one before it called again?
Ragnarok.
Ragnarok was a banger.
I got to be honest, I didn't like Lord Love and Thunder, but I didn't hate it.
I went into that theatre and I left and I just went, that sure was a movie.
That in fact was a movie.
I know there's been a criticism with Taika Waititi, he's a great director,
but as a writer he can only write one kind of film.
I think with Love and Thunder he might have had more of the writing duties
and there's not as much oversight.
I think he does a load of really good films.
I love Jojo Rabbit, I really like the film.
The film was awesome.
What we do in the shadows is hilarious.
We do in the shadows, of course.
Am I a deviant?
Yes!
Love Laszlo.
Anyone hasn't seen that?
Go ahead, Zoe.
There was a deleted scene from Love and Thunder where Zeus is a lot more approachable
and not just the worst.
It actually gives a good lesson and it's a good moment with him and Thor.
But Marvel movies aren't allowed to be serious anymore,
so that's probably why that got cut, because there weren't any jokes in that scene.
Or different.
I think I've seen the same film the last three times now.
Same film, different superpower.
Bro, it's not fun anymore.
I hate Marvel, I really hate them now.
Oh, Bigger Piggy too.
It was the end of Endgame and they're like, oh, we're going to do Asgardians of the Galaxy.
I was like, oh, that would be fun.
And they lost like two minutes in Love and Thunder.
Oh, that was rubbish.
They just had a brief firefight where they sat behind rocks and didn't do anything.
That was fun.
It was a 30 second intro montage and then a two minute fight,
and that was the end of the Asgardians of the Galaxy.
It wasn't even a fight, Thor just went, I win.
Oh, rest in peace, Marvel.
Please stop making movies.
But, crying over Marvel's horrid downfall aside,
we have Hal rocking up to first place with five points.
Yes.
We have Eli with four and a half.
Wait, where are we out here?
And Andy with three.
Oh, okay.
We're not far off each other.
To be honest, I just liked how whenever Hal is winning a quiz,
he goes into like an evil villain voice, he goes, yes.
I get competitive at some level, but it's not because I like, I had to beat someone.
You can't win anymore, Hal.
You've got five points. We need to catch up.
You need to stop winning.
In fact, wait, isn't there like six answers so far?
Never mind.
What?
I thought there was no six questions as well.
So if, oh no.
Yes.
Oh fuck, I got one wrong.
Damn it.
Oh, that's where, damn it.
Yeah, that's how that works.
Pain.
I don't do the math correctly.
I'm just here for the war.
Oh wait, I goofed.
Hal has six.
Oh yeah, I thought I was going crazy there.
Sorry.
That was a user error.
I probably could have just kept silent.
You could have gone into the next results bit and gone, Hal has four points.
And then you could have said, I thought I had five.
All that would have amounted to was the comments calling me a moron.
And I'd like to avoid that.
Don't worry. You don't have to make the mistake I did last time, which is there are too many questions with too many points and counting that was a nightmare.
I did try to.
I did realize editing that was a nightmare, squishing them into the scoreboards.
So yeah, we'll give a maximum next time.
Yeah.
Well, now it's time for the hard section.
How's everyone feeling before I open the content?
My confidence is shaking.
I'm quivering.
I'm hoping that Eli wins so that Hal doesn't keep winning.
I'm kind of agree.
I hope Eli wins too.
If we give a point for comedy, Eli is slam dunking this.
He is.
I'm getting all of the memes.
And I love every one of them, except for that Finnebara nonsense.
Anyway, though, it's time to get hard.
Yo, yo, yo, official statement.
Pancreas don't work.
What is this?
I don't consent.
Can someone clip that please?
I met hard questions.
You get your heads out of the gutter.
Your fans are going to go rabid for that one.
Oh heads in the gutter.
I got to appeal to my audience.
It's on the Internet forever.
That's the problem.
With this quiz.
I've said much worse on my channel than that.
Someone is going to take that clip and they're going to make it into like a mobile, like, notification.
And then they're just like, what did Colin say?
Oh, I've got a text.
Oh, well, I can't look like more of a clown than I already do.
Don't worry.
We're all hard.
Let's do this.
With that wonderful beginning, let's start with the first question of the hard section.
What is the Akari Dara slash Spirefall, which is the not Elf speak version of this event?
What?
What is the Akari Dara slash?
What is the Spirefall?
It's a difficult question.
That's what it is.
Damn.
It's the hard section now.
True.
Eli.
I can already feel like Eli has just done something cursed.
What Eli?
I was ready to be reminded of that today.
Have you had a family member who has suffered from irritable bowel syndrome?
Andy's given me a following closely in Eli's footsteps.
High five Eli.
Who high fived themselves there?
That was more of a click of the fingers.
That sounds nice to be fair.
That was nice.
Would you like another one?
I'm making a guess.
You have to sing this bit, by the way.
Are you going to finish the rest of the song?
No, it's a call and response.
Gotcha.
Moving on to the next question in the hard section.
The Lumineth are divided into several great nations, similar to how the Hylos of old lived.
How many great nations are there, and name as many as you can.
Oh, easy.
Did you say there were seven just then?
No, I said similar to the Hylos of old.
I thought you said there are seven great nations.
How many are there?
Did you just say it?
Oh no.
Can you read the question again, sir?
I got a bit lost.
Sure, sure.
The Lumineth are divided into several great nations, similar to the high elves of old.
How many are there, and name as many as you can.
Bro, why you do this to me, man?
It's the hard section.
Can you say it again, please?
Is it a big number or a small number, at least?
Is that a clue?
It is a medium number.
One more time for Andy.
The Lumineth are divided into several great nations, similar to the high elves of old fantasy.
How many great nations are there, and name as many as you can.
I have my answer from Ethan.
Watch out.
Damn it.
Oh, man.
I'm struggling.
Broken colon.
Is he actually crying?
Oh my lord, he's actually broken him.
There's something about when you...
You pissed my pants.
No, you did not.
I didn't actually piss myself.
Calm down.
I was just insolent.
You were insolent all over yourself.
Maybe we should do a monthly laugh there.
I just want to start with the answer of whatever that is, because I'm just damn curious now.
You're nice.
How do you have your answer?
I put my numbers too high, but I'm going to give one more because I just...
Christ.
I've got tears in my eyes.
Oh my goodness.
Please tell me someone has at least gotten an answer.
I wouldn't get your answer.
Oh my lord.
I'm actually trying to be fair for some reason.
What's wrong with me?
You know what?
Screw it.
I'm committing to this.
It's not good, but it's the best I got.
You put...
Whatever.
It's the best I got.
We'll go with that.
And for the last section of the hard section, what is the name of the settlement in Haish
where the Lumineth have set it up to test cooperation between themselves and other races?
So the Lumineth in this settlement live in perfect harmony with absolutely no 1984 mind
control whatsoever with the elves and the dwarves and the humans and anyone else.
What's the name of this place?
I don't know if I went too far.
Oh boy.
Okay.
I don't know if I went too far.
This is naughty.
Oh no.
Oh.
Yeah.
Beautiful.
This was in fact a Lumineth quiz.
And we Luminethed all over the setting.
Oh my lord.
I think...
No, there's no way someone else's is more offensive than mine.
I don't know.
I've just sent mine in.
Maybe we're all thinking the same thing.
I don't know.
Oh my god.
I had someone with mine down.
I gotta breathe.
Deep breath.
From the top.
We're gonna get through this.
Viewers, hold his hand.
We're gonna get through this.
Maybe not.
We're gonna start from the top.
What is the Akari Dara slash Spirefall?
I'm just gonna tell everyone what it is because I'm not gonna be able to go back to this after reading the answers.
That's fair.
So this is basically the Lumineth's version of the fall of the Eldar.
Unlike the fall of the Eldar, it was a much slower build up as tensions and the pride of the Lumineth grew to a boiling point.
And then, of course, the difference between this and the fall of the Eldar is instead of Silnesh eating everyone, the Lumineth nations descended into anarchy and chaos.
You couldn't even call it a civil war because it was just rampant bloodshed as Lumineth fought Lumineth that was eventually halted when Teklas re-enlightened the society with the spirit of the moon's wisdom.
That's a really long answer.
If you were hoping for us to type that out, that would have taken ages.
No, there's... I would have lived with, honestly, the Lumineth version of the fall of the Eldar.
Okay.
It's just like a monkey where if we have an infinite amount of time, we'll eventually type up Shakespeare and we'll eventually type the right answer.
I just thought I'd give the full explanation.
No, no, no, that's good. That's good. That's good.
Now, for the answers I got, we'll start with Hal.
It's call and response.
Well, you got to start it off then if I'm responding.
Country roads.
Nice.
Take me home.
To the place.
I belong.
We can't sing too much, we'll get copyright.
Virginia.
To mama.
That's my own family, you know.
Take me home.
Oh, that's cool.
Eli's home.
Eli's roads.
That's my best answer, ever given.
Unfortunately, Hal that does not get a point.
Eli, this mother MF just said the name of a Baku Khan.
Yo.
Literally is.
Hey, Rick.
Andy, bring it up strong with Eldar version of the Kama Sutra.
He said Karma Sutra, which is not how you spell it or say it.
Technically, he was the closest of all of us.
Technically.
I think you should get a point for that.
Half point.
I'm going to have to say no.
I'm also going to have to say Andy, they're not Eldar, they're elves.
I made that mistake before.
I made that mistake too.
But for the next question, the Luminath are divided into several great nations, similar to the high elves of old.
There are eight of them.
And they are Sear, Yemetrica, Zytrek, Illumnia, Helen, Arathrai, Ulthitrai, and Illyatha.
Pardon me.
Helen?
Is that a 40 year old lady Helen?
No, it's H-E-L-O-N.
Ah.
My imagery was way off.
And for the answers, Hal has given me 12 and then only gave me four nations.
Didn't have time.
Chicago, Vvardenfell, Diabeto, and Pizzacutter.
Feeling a little bit stung, might have to demote Hal by exactly two points.
Diabeto is from Family Guy.
You're lucky that's for type two diabetics.
I am very lucky.
Eli followed it up with drop kick elves, punch elves in the face, kick elven babies, put elves in a blender and make elf smoothies.
Throw elves into space, shoot elves into the sun, curb stop your elven niggas, blow up elven orphanages.
And then following that, a picture of Arnold Schwarzenegger running from Barnes and Noble with the caption, me leaving Barnes and Noble after moving up an aisle before I'll just be grid section.
I'll put my picture of myself longer than the Nereberger Isle.
Wasn't Eli, it says we're human, man. It's so dark.
The Isle of Berger made me go sick, oh my god.
It's such a contral. Eli sounds so pleasant and friendly. And then he's just like, they bring out El Doran murder.
El Doran murder. Look how every episode we do, we see a little bit more of the darkness inside and he's like, I have more evil to spill.
And we're like, yes, come on, it's funny.
When he says deadless for the dark god, he must be the dark god. Jesus Christ.
Let's breathe after that.
I did give you the answer, right? Where was it?
You did give a answer. Unfortunately, the answer is not correct. Your answer of four great nations, Mayeb, I can get one fourth point.
Unfortunately, that is not correct.
Tough times.
Shame.
But I am crying right now.
Such a tough quiz. We're mourning.
And the last question, what is the name of the settlement in Haish with all the fancy cooperation?
Oh, what about Annie's answer?
Oh, shit, I did skip Andy's. That's right. His answer was zero, no filthy, Xenos nation is great. They're not aliens, they're not Xenos.
Not how fantasy settings work.
They are on the same planet.
Andy wins the Make Colin Seath award.
You've cried, you've gotten angry. What else have you got left to do now?
My lawyers advised me not to finish that joke.
I know, I know. We can't say that on YouTube.
Anyway, what is the name of that settlement with no mind control and everyone loves each other and it's great?
The name is Settlers Gain.
Al has given me Epstein Island.
That's pretty, that's pretty dumb.
Eli gave me another dual answer of someone at the gym.
The caption, Mom, hurry and come pick me up. There are high elves here.
And his word answer, blast site parentheses, I pumped it and they are dead now.
I'm overstimulated. We need to calm down.
And action change.
No, it's not breaking Colin.
The Chaz, the Capitol Hill autonomous zone.
Oh my lord.
We've sworn too much already in this one because this is too much.
YouTube eased back on the swearing, remember?
We're too emotional.
Just because all the YouTubers started swearing at them.
And they're like, oh no, we've read what we've sought to destroy. It's increasing the swearing. Oh no.
Oh, pain.
And with that, the scores have not changed in the slightest.
Yep.
Tricks for Hal, 4.5 for Eli and 3 for Andy.
This next question though.
Oh no.
I'm going to make two points.
Just to see if Eli can get a win.
Oh, maybe.
He's excited.
When Nagash, or pardon me, before Nagash and Tekhlus fought, what did Nagash call Tekhlus for the bonus question?
Didn't you mention this not long ago?
Not on lore crimes.
Oh. Oh. Ah. Something.
See, I don't want to give a serious answer because if Eli's got a chance to overtake me.
But I also have no faith that Eli's going to put a serious answer.
Exactly. Yeah, this man has a quota to fill.
Thank you, porky pig.
What did he call Tekhlus? Tekhlus, right? Not Tyrion?
Yeah, Tekhlus.
Oh, okay.
Tyrion has done very little in the lore so far.
Wasn't he blind?
He is blind. He sees through Tekhlus's eyes.
Damn. That sucks.
I don't know. Magic elf garbage. I don't know.
I mean, in the dressing room, like, Christ, that's like the torture.
You're gods. They can just poof themselves up clothing.
We have Andy's ass.
He might say it's not very inventive, but still.
Oh, man. Eli, please tell me you are... Are you putting a serious answer, Eli?
I'm in the works.
Okay, I'm going to put a joke one because I just have to do it.
Can I have whatever I want to hint for the bonus round?
Hint us away.
It is a specific reference to Warhammer fantasy, what Nagash calls him.
I think I've gotten onto it. I think I've got it.
Yep, that's exactly what he said, Hal.
That's close there.
Well, good work. How's one? Good night, everyone.
I wouldn't be so confident.
Eli's still cooking. Let him cook.
I think he's just making another meme.
How many points does this one worth?
It's just like, I need a minute.
How many points is this question worth?
Two.
Oh, he could seriously overtake then.
This could be bad for me.
Oh, man. I feel like my Lumineth...
I don't think I emerged from this quiz knowing more about Lumineth than Dwayne is.
We sure know more about...
Us. Disgusting human beings.
We sure know more about drop-kicking elves.
Put him in a blender. Someone has to...
We have to put a beat behind that at some point.
Drop him, make him, put him in a blender.
All right, one second.
Shrek. I'll mash him, stick him in a stew.
Shrek? That's Lord of the Rings? What did you say?
What are you talking about? You do not get to be part of movies anymore.
Did you just say Shrek?
You confused Shrek with Lord of the Rings.
Yeah.
Eddie Murphy didn't say that.
They're both great movies, but come on now.
That's the reason I was thinking of the scene from Shrek where he's like,
Oh, feast on your eyes. Actually, it's quite good on toast.
But then I thought of Latmos bread, which must have been Lord of the...
I crossed my wires. Darn it.
That's an actual law crime.
That might be the worst... That's up there with Kaifers Kane the Death Guard.
Like the level of...
What was it even Warhammer and that's a law crime?
I know.
That's a hate crime.
You're an equal opportunity criminal organization.
Anyone square came for a law crime.
People in the chat, you have to like vehemently tell us how bad that was.
Or if you, again, like...
We've all done pretty bad actual law crimes. We've all made a bit of a...
A bit of a bluff here and there, but you know.
But to be fair, Colin hasn't seen Rocky.
So bear that in mind.
That is true, to be fair.
Well, he hasn't seen the Godfather.
No Godfather, no Rocky.
Five or six.
Oh my God.
Have you seen Creed?
Yeah, Creed's good.
No.
Not what I haven't seen.
No.
Creed.
No.
God.
Have you seen Pepper Figg the movie?
Whatever.
Yeah, Thorgrim was in it.
Oh, and I have the bonus questions in.
So what he said, he called Teclis, Teclis of Ulthuan.
Which I like very much because usually when GW references Warhammer fantasy,
they're not the world that was and refused to bring up anything specific about it
because they're afraid if they say anything from Warhammer fantasy,
it's going to appear in a mirror like Bloody Mary.
But no, they straight up said Teclis of Ulthuan.
Teclis even had flashbacks to being a ripple in bed watching his brother be awesome.
He did that.
Wait, I'm joking. That's too far.
It was a nice moment of characterization for Teclis.
He's also a bit of an arrogant dick as well.
By Elven standards, he's pretty cool.
He admitted Felix had a great point.
That's true. That's true.
I just wondered what you were going to say there.
For some reason, I finished the sentence like, oh, you told him you had nice abs.
Oh, that was quite nice of him, but it doesn't seem relevant.
I don't know where that...
That's very offhand.
I'm sure Felix Yeager has the finest of eight packs, but that's unrelated.
Bro, you've been going to the gym. You've been with Eli.
Yeah, good games.
As for my answers, though, according to Hal, Nagash called Teclis Lego Fleshlight.
Yeah, I own it.
Think about it. Digest it.
Lego Fleshlight movie.
Mash it. Stick it in a stew.
We're going to skip Eli's answer for the end because this is just beautiful.
Andy gave me elf looking pussy bitch, which I'm sure he said it is.
I'm sure he said it is Andy from the movie.
It's very phrased.
And I think I need to just share this one directly for Eli's answer for the bonus question.
Oh, no.
Oh, God, we'll have to put this on the screen for people to see.
That is perhaps one of the funniest things I've seen.
How did you make that?
The original is just Pepe with his helicopter device.
Do you want to describe it, Eli, for the people who are just listening?
It's Pepe with a dwarf Wojak face, and he has a helicopter backpack.
And the high elf Wojak with his helmet has a shirt that says six foot two master race.
And since he's so tall, the helicopter blades perfectly line up with his neck and decapitate him.
It's a master. It's actually glorious.
That is a masterpiece.
Hashtag short kings.
Wow. That definitely that gets a point, surely.
At least really tempted, but yeah, it's not right.
And yeah, and there's the rest of Eli's memes.
I've been getting all posted in the for people to see if they want to.
Oh, my glorious, glorious.
And with that quiz, we have probably the lowest scoring quiz we've had yet.
Just this plan for all of you. This was my vengeance before I go back to taking last place next time.
But who really took vengeance on this one? I feel like you suffer the most.
I got some amazing memes out of it. I think I'm pretty happy.
That's true.
I haven't laughed that hard in a month.
With that, Mal is the winner with six points.
Eli in second with four point five and Andy three.
Eli is the true winner, though, I have to say, because the memes are just popping.
If we give out the comedy award, Eli sweeps.
Deadlift sweep.
But that was the Lumineth realmlords. Are there any final words, anyone?
We really Luminethed all over the setting, didn't we?
Yes, yes, we did. We Luminethed all over our viewer base.
Well, you don't get to start it and then be angry when I keep it going.
You're damn right about that. Wow.
That was scarring.
Yeah.
What have we done?
At least we've got a palate cleanser with the next quiz, don't we?
Oh, yes. So does anyone want to say what's the special about the next quiz we have coming up?
Colin, do you know who we are possibly having on our, I say show, our disaster, shall we say?
I do. We are going to be have, having, I'm having a stroke.
And much like I'm having a stroke, we're going to be having on as a guest.
Deadlift for the Dark Gods.
Fuck.
Dreadanon.
How did you mess that up?
What do you mean? We already have Deadlift for the Dark Gods.
I was looking at the Discord and I saw your last name.
Special guest, Deadlift for the Dark Gods, never been seen before.
Special guest, someone who's been on the project since the beginning.
Oh, that's funny.
That would have been great if you're like, we didn't have a guest, we were just messing with you.
We're having Dreadanon on the, on the PugWiz boys and girls.
Sorry, we broke Colin's mental state so much he couldn't figure out.
Fun fact for all the listeners, as of this moment, I've been awake for 26 hours.
Sounds, sounds about right.
And I think that might be the worst lurch round of all.
I'd like to say on behalf of everyone, Eli, I can't wait for you to be on the podcast.
Yeah, bring his A game.
Really happy to be invited guys, it's been long.
I'd like to formally apologize for my brain blue screening.
It was funny, don't apologize. It was funny.
But yes, we will be having Dreadanon as our next guest. We're all very excited.
Oh, your brain. Oh, sorry. Sorry, I had to do it.
I was hoping for like a Skaven voice or a Karl Franz, but yeah, if you want to tell him to say that, go nuts.
I will probably do that at some point.
Just like, hey Dread, can you do some greatest hits from your channel?
No, we should do that as some of the answers, shouldn't we?
We type out some of his own memes so he has to voice them.
Oh my god, this is a plan.
He has a very cool topic though, so stay tuned.
And for everyone who was watching and listening, thank you so much. Please like and subscribe.
That really helps the channel, helps our self esteem.
We apologize for any time we annoyed you or insulted you or anything that we did in today's episode.
If we make fun of your country, your island or something like that, we apologize.
But actually no, we don't. We stand by it. We make the law crimes here.
This is officially law crimes.
So thank you so much for listening and watching, and we'll see you all next time.
Peace.
Take care everyone.
There are high elves in your neighbour's skin. You have to tear them off.
On the high elves. On the high elves and kill them.
On the high elves in a blender. Take care everyone.
Bye.