Hello, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome to Lore
Crimes. Today we have a nice, simple, easy little
video for y 'all. We got a tier list going, but
not just any tier list. We're not saying who's
best or who's the strongest, strictly speaking.
Who can we take in a fight? And by we, I mean
us four. We're going to pick some characters,
some general ideas. What if we just started beating
the snot out of him? What kind of odds do we
got? I'm confident about some of these fellas.
How confident are you going into this? I feel
like we've got a good shot against at least a
couple. Caiaphas Kane's strongest goobers. Here
we go. Let's go. I mean, if we're honest, this
is just Eli with the three meat shields. What
do you mean the meat shields? He is the meat
slab. He's the beef. He's the prime rib. What
are we talking about? yeah i got the tank build
how how is the dps build look at that guy how
how would stay throw myself i would throw myself
from england i don't know that's a thing no you're
from america right there collins range build
because he's american i'm support like go on
guys I don't actually own a firearm. I do have
a bow and arrow, and I was at one point a decent
shot with it. I mean, a bow and arrow is basically
an old -school AR -15. Let's not kid ourselves.
That was, at the time, the cutting edge of technology.
You say that. I mean, people see in movies an
arrow hits someone in the arm, and then you just
go, ow, oof. That's not how that works. If you
get hit with a bow and arrow, like... You don't
have an arm anymore. It's not Hollywood like
that. It's like 80 pounds of force directly through
you. Yeah. It's more of a... How would know about
that? Because in England, that was how the paupers
started to fight against the knights. Because
they were like, hey, we'll just fire a load of
arrows and kill the rich people. And as a rich
person, how would know about peasant uprisings?
because of his ancestry uh many killed by arrows
well to be fair colin won it from the sweat of
his brow rather than hereditary means inheritance
yeah and lots of lots of fell deeds from the
past but yeah anyway how what are we talking
about today uh as colin Yeah, Colin beautifully
explained. Which I'll say, thank you guys for
watching, I say Lodgecaster, Law Crimes. We,
of course, are on Spotify, we're on all other
stuff. If you want to catch the live episodes,
which are done on Fridays, it's when we have
all the donations and all your funny comments
and all that good stuff. We love you guys, especially
the live crew, because you are much funnier than
us. But today we've... brought you cemented...
Oh, Possum's here, of course he is. No, you rat.
No, I'm joking. We love you. Leave me alone.
Leave me alone. As Colin was saying earlier,
we have brought an offering to the table, one
that we wholeheartedly hope you make fun of,
because it's us four idiots, and we want to talk
about who we could take in a fight. Maybe you
guys could talk about how the comments, who you
actually legitimately think you could take. It's
not going to start strong, I'm not going to lie.
It's not going to start strong. Just out of the
gate, I'm asthmatic and I have anaphylaxis, so
randomly I have a debuff. I have a debuff permanently
and randomly I stop breathing, so that doesn't
help in a combat situation. Colin, what's your
build? Average. Mage build? Yeah, sure, let's
go Mage build. His mana potions are insulin.
Yeah, sure, there we go. Dude, I don't know.
Look, give me... Look, let me speedball a little
bit. I can handle this. Okay. I mean, Eli's our
strongest bet. Dude is ripped. He's our own God
trick. Eli the Barbarian King, yeah. Is that
the right term? Yes, yes. Speedballing is what
I think it is. Okay, yeah. Yeah, I got this then,
fellas. Settle down. I can take this. I'm going
to rule this turn now. And Hal just goes, hey,
paupers, fight for me. take these shillings just
frozen i think i i could make a really good like
if you need me in the opening bit to like throw
a dead body at someone i think i because i'm
kind of i'm the tallest one out of all probably
i could probably of the lower class at least
i could cover two and a half of you and you used
me as like a battering ram so yeah i'd be pretty
solid al has constructed a wall of dead paupers
as a shield which he carries into battle one
post at a time I am 180. You know who my father
is. As he walks forward with his fencing sword.
It's great. I wish I still had one. I'm being
really mean to him, but I love him really. So
we're going to start off strong, guys. Just bear
in mind, everyone, we're not pitting against
an entire army. We're thinking, like, let's take
a piece of an army, of a faction, whatever. So
let's start off with the four of us. Can we take
the Emperor of Mankind? I ain't gonna lie to
you, man. I'm always down for Emperor Slander.
I do not think I'm built for this one. But how
would we do it if we tried? I think we would
try and do anything and then we would just kind
of cease to exist. Surely, by using our knowledge
of the Warhammer universe, we could communicate
to some Xenos faction. About the best way to
slay the Emperor, which we recently did a video
on. And then maybe through proxy means something
could happen. We just lag our way into the throne
room and just say, don't worry, I'm supposed
to be here. I fixed the golden throne. And we
just turn the dial down and he starts going...
well i guess yeah like can can we be 1v4ing like
golden throne emperor because then i'll just
start ripping out cables i think i've got that
fight down i've got it guys we throw up we get
caught by a black ship already a rough start
already a rough start hope to one hope to be
god emperor one of us is a psycho in this scenario.
That's the closest we're going to get. And all
they have between them is a poop. I mean, there's
no chance, but the only, the only idea I have
is we, uh, throw ourselves at the other psych
is being sacrificed and we kill as many of them
as we can. Maybe, you know, deny him. Maybe he,
you know, like it's like his buffet into an appetizer.
That's what you're suggesting. I'm thinking more,
uh, the life support plug is pulled. kind of
that's how we take in yeah and you know yeah
and you know some some people may say that you
know like gilliman that talking to the emperor
was like you know getting his brain sandblasted
but like i'm not talking to the emperor i'm just
gonna unplug some cords totally different i'll
say for the for the tier list is s like we've
got no chance or d is like we've got white d
is like we have no chance i think yes i think
i think this is the very bottom of d i have a
strategy what i would do is i would um i'd make
a deal with the harlequins and the drukari and
the craft world is to try and get him out the
board i'd speak to cypher and be like oh by the
way if the reason he doesn't want to chat to
you is because he wants to get rid of the dark
angels and then get him to turn on him and then
it'll also be like oh custodians um i heard that
the grey knights have this thing called the terminus
decree you should go to titan and sort them out
it's probably going to take the whole like amount
like all of you to sort them out and then me
and the harlequins go in like let's get him let's
get him i'll just watch you guys sort it out
it's fine in this scenario can we be reminded
there's like four regular schmoes jogging alongside
these. I have an idea. I have an idea. How about
the, the law of this episode is we're all John
chromaticus esque perpetuals. So every time we
die, it doesn't matter because we get reborn
and we, this is how the timeline goes. We go
like again and again and again and again. And
that's, it's like, um, groundhog day where every
time we die, we're like, ah, You win some, you
lose some, and that's the lore about we just
turn up again and again. I like the idea that
we have infinite tries. I think that's a good...
And D is just like there's no conceivable way
over infinite lives. It's just that it ain't
happening. I'm pretty sure this is the most decent.
I think the Emperor is still in D in this case.
I still think we could use our knowledge of Warhammer.
to negotiate with outer factions and make something
happen i feel like that's reaching i think that's
reaching too much i don't yeah i think that kind
of breaks the spirit of the of the 1v4 you know
that's not quite yeah maybe we could pull that
off but like you know in the 1v4 you know who
comes out of the thunderdome alive not us which
is just emperor stays in the d is like that's
that's the litmus test of like that is impossible
Yeah. All right. The next one can just go above
the emperor in D tier. I think not. Can we put
them in C tier? Cause only because like, look,
we could get Conrad curse and just like, you
know, I mean, he kind of did quite literally
ask for it and then died. So like, look, there's
the, that's slight one out of like 19 chance.
We just handle it. No problem. True. There are
other ones. You could be like, Oh, call this.
If you kill yourself, no one would notice because
you're so irrelevant to the plot. Yeah, that
would work as well. Can I ask you a question?
If we have access to Warhammer technology, because
we're in -universe, is the Thanos Ant -Man method
in our reach? What kind of Warhammer books have
you been reading lately, Hal? Because fanfiction
is not official lore. I'm just wondering if there's
any other way we could do it. I'm going to crawl
up your bungus. I'm just saying. Even when they're
baby Primarchs, even four of us couldn't take
one. We're screwed. If we have unlimited tries,
we could probably find a way to do it. If we
had unlimited tries. I mean, Hubris is usually...
Gilliman is the yardstick of how many times a
non -Primarch has tried to kill him. Corferon
got pretty close. The Alpha Legion got pretty
close. Anyone else? I can't help but notice that
all of these people are space marines. I know,
but when you consider that it's just like a group
of guys with bolters almost killed Gilliman by
pretending to be ultramarines, I feel like a
bunch of schlubs being like, hey, we're here
to give you a Caesar salad, and then one of us
has a Fulgurite. It'd be like, oh, maybe we...
And I'd be like, can I ask you about your tech
system while one of us is feeding him grapes
and then the other person is playing a harp.
Eli, Eli, Eli, get him, get him, stab him in
the neck with a full grape, come on. I feel like
between the four of us. If we all carry vortex
grenades and then just detonate them when we
walk up to him. We don't even get close. Although,
there's also like, look, didn't he get stabbed
by an anatheme and he just kind of said... Nah.
It's like, nuh -uh. He was given, like, god poison.
And he was just like, nah. Daddy and body. To
be fair, that one was more of a possession than
him really doing anything on that part. I just
realized that. Where are we going? Let's add
a katana. Why not? Let's put a katana in there,
too. Okay. In the book, in the Silent King book,
which is... supremely mid by the way um the freaking
misenius ponders and says that a normal human
could technically kill gilliman if they had enough
luck so i think that's enough enough evidence
right there yeah i i feel like um i take a page
out of the dark angels traitors not the dark
angels the uh what the ones in how that try to
plant a nuke on the lion ship uh true the soroshi
yeah yeah a primark you don't have to fight him
with a sword you could put a nuke on his ship
and put him way away vent him into i think we
are reaching a little bit This is no longer a
1v4. I'm just saying, Gilliman's got more important
things to do. If I crash the Vengeful Spirit
into him, he'll probably die. I'm just saying,
the Emperor, specific to the Emperor on the throne,
you know he's in a heavily guarded location.
Gilliman's all over the place. If you can get
him at a supply depot or transit, you sabotage
an engine, you maybe vent all the chambers of
oxygen with the gas mask on. I feel like we gotta...
come down some rules again is this a 1v4 in like
a room or is this like we're just in the universe
and we have to fight them we're in universe and
it's only the four of us are in on the plan we
can't necessarily get other people involved yeah
it's a it's a four hour getting them involved
is our capabilities to convince them so it's
like we can't be like i've got a superpower i'm
a blank it's like if i can be like hey harlequins
i'm a bit of a shitter how about you join me
and we'll have a laugh i feel like i could manage
that but then if i'm like well maybe but then
i'm a perpetual but then it's like oh i can't
just be like hey high -ranking navy guy do you
want like self -destruct the ship we're on like
that wouldn't work it's like what are your strengths
you know i have i have one idea but i fear it
might be the only method the only method we'll
be using going forward though um we spend the
remainder of our lives working in a ship slowly
like i'm talking we get ancient we work our way
up to eventually we get in charge of the ship
controls and we just like go into the sun Is
there any option left to us other than that?
Once more into the sun, why not? Because a fist
fight with any Primark is immediate pasting.
So, hmm. Maybe. I think Primark should be top
of D tier. It would take us like a thousand years
of trying. It would take us a thousand. And after
the first try, they'll recognize us. So it'll
be so hard to do anything. And to be fair, there's
the whole Nemesis book where a bunch of assassins
try to kill one Primarch Horus. And it is the
big one. And they can't do it. Yeah, but still.
They got pretty close, to be fair. What about
a Space Marine? That's C tier. If we just find
the right weapons, we can do it. We could kill
a Space Marine, I think. I mean, they've been
killed by, like, sticks and shit before. Yeah,
it's feasible. We just need to find the big gun.
Or that. I feel like all of us would die a few
times before we even got close, though. Probably.
Like, what if we just stuck a melt, like, one
has had a melter and just stuck it on his ass?
Al wants to be the Al -Qaeda of Warhammer 40k.
I gotta be honest. I'm thinking of one specific
piece of art. This one here, that's just some
random guy with a shiv. Yeah, but there was probably
like a hundred guys in front of him to start.
And you've literally got like Pyramid Head's
younger brother with a spear chucking that in
the mix as well. Another guy just grabbing his
leg like, get in there! And it's like, oh, poor
Castellans of the Rift. No one remembers they're
even there. We gotta make sure. We got to be
part of a horde of like 200 dudes and make sure
we're in the back Or we could do it This is no
longer a 1v4 Wait, wait, wait, wait true. There's
a wait. Wait, maybe I can find it Remember that
like all of the guy with a grenade and there's
a word bad. He's like What they call the The
Warhawk? Not the Warhawks. Or the Elysian. The
Elysian drop trooper or whatever. And he's just
there with a grenade like, ha ha ha! You're 10
,000 years old, but crack grenade! I think this
is C tier because it would be challenging to
find a space marine first at all. But I think
we would basically get a few... If we all had
to survive this attempt, it's not happening.
It would take all of us. We can just meat grinder
it. Why not? Strap a melter charge to each other.
Maybe BT then. If we can just find tools to do
it, then I think BT is fine. Because I'm trying
to think of instances where occasionally there
are parts of the lore where it's just like, a
lucky Lasgun shot went through the eye lens of
a Chaos Space Marine and killed him. It's very
rare, but it's just like, oh, womp womp, there
goes a Chaos Space Marine. Just some guy shot
him in the eye at the right moment. So I feel
like B, because that's like space marines are
special, they are pretty cool, but they do die
to mortal people. We could do one. That's the
idea. No, one space marine. We could handle one.
Of Phantom Pain says this whole conversation
is just Skaven Slave Maxing. That's a perfect
episode idea. As a tier list of 1 to 1 billion
Skaven Slaves, how many Skaven Slaves would it
take to kill something? It's like that, how many
5th graders could you fight? It's like those
videos where it's like a dark soul. A Dark Souls
boss versus a bunch of trolls. I think the original
question is how many waves of first graders like
Call of Duty zombies could you take with a fifth
grader boss fight every five waves? What about
Dreadnought? We need to melt a bomb. actually
probably would be easier to kill the space marine
because they can't turn around as fast we just
have to strap back like the work in uh the work
in the dawn of war trailer he just he just throws
a stick melted bomb yeah yeah just get it to
his back and clamber and go stop it stupid stupid
or a screwdriver just like enough i feel like
still see me you know what put it in b just because
it's like there's some read difficult ones like
we i think we could do it we could do it take
one hour at least if john orc boy can do it i
think we can do it i've seen the next one so
i'm like the only other thing to remember grad
noughts go to sleep we could always attack it
while it's outside of the chassis just be like
drop it from like the the chains and just have
at it with a shiv or something like if he's not
in the chassis he hasn't got any guns what's
he gonna do he's like a lump He's a lump in a
sarcophagus. We can get him. Four guys. Why not?
I think we could... Feasibly, this is possible.
I feel like it's more possible. If you get a
Space Marine unawares, he's still a heavily armed...
He's still a muscular dude that could kill you
with his hands. You get this guy unawares, he's
a torso in a tube. Our death would be infinitely
more painful, but we could do it. Theoretically.
In a war situation, it's harder to kill the Dreadnought.
But also, Dreadnought would be like, oh, that's
just some mortal guys. I'm not going to waste
my arm. You can take advantage of that. I feel
like a Dreadnought would be easier to kill than
a Space Marine. Yeah. Nice. China's talking about
bringing up children. Grey Knights probably seats
here, right? I'd even argue that's D, because
they're psychers. I mean, like, even some of
the Primarchs are not necessarily, like, psychers.
We could maybe do one Primarch. Maybe. You can
still get the lucky surprise shot on a Grey Knight
to kill it, though. Not really. They have...
I don't think... How would we ever surprise a
Grey Knight? They'd read our mind. They have
prognosticators. They can see the future. Yeah.
I don't think this is higher than a C2. No, you're
insane. Sorry, hold on. That's the top. No, wait.
That's the top. Because the lower down the list...
They're all psychers. They would read our mind
as soon as we tried to get close. Yeah, we would
get licked once, as Mike says. They'd all have
decked out gear. They all have storm bolters.
Yeah, this ain't going well. They kill everybody
on site anyway. Matt Ward's blessings are too
strong. Custodian. C? Because theoretically it's
C. I think he's right because you could surprise
when they can't read your mind. You could pull
up with the bazooka and just if he doesn't have
a helmet on then he's dead. El Bozo. I'm pretty
sure they can survive a rocket launcher. It depends
on what book we're in. It depends on what book
we're in. sometimes custodians are supremely
mid i don't know yeah are we in the background
event where six of them take on a high fleet
or are we in the war of the beast i feel like
we have to put them above a space marine though
yeah yeah well that's why i'm saying c tier i
think c i think c c tier is reasonable it's like
because again you could melt a bomb the guy Yeah,
I could ambush one custodian like if we rigged
a whole area. I mean they would probably know
we were doing that Anyway, it's still like I
feel like a thousand thousand thousand tries.
I mean And the thing is they have blood games
as well. So they kind of know what mortals are
like we're trying like every minute Okay, they're
analyzing. What's the biggest threat to terror?
Which is where they mostly are like we wouldn't
get close, but they don't have Future sight which
help I think I think We should move the Space
Marine and Drennaut into C tier because I'm realizing
most mortal things are going to be B tier. Okay.
It's still going to be hard. It's still going
to be hard to 1v1 a Guardsman. Yeah, that is
still like a well -trained soldier. Well, I mean,
depending on where they're coming from. It's
Acadian. We'll go with the average. So in that
case, it is still a fairly well -trained, equipped
soldier. with a laser rifle. What if we're there?
We could take him. If we were in the guard as
well, we could just kill someone in their sleep.
It's true. It'd be really easy to get one of
them. But if we're in a straight 1v1 fight with
no tricks, it'd be harder. I think one of us
would get punched so hard in the beginning that
we'd be like, ugh. this is the expression of
um of russell while we're uh talking about all
this stuff just looking off into the distance
couldn't care at all i said before we get any
further though um there's any more of the was
there any uh donations we need to go through
yes there are would you like to start on time
as always stream mr document usa stream late
i started reading stream late due to hell doing
something before i even saw it thanks for five
bucks man uh stream late due to how taking all
of the emperor's children just not in a fight
truer colin be taking teclis if you know what
i mean Thank you, SkateLater. Thank you, YoYuSkateLater
with the five New Zealand. DonkeyManUSA has been
a member for 23 months, almost two years. Two
years. War Crimes is old. We're old. Colin has
no gun. Typical Illinois subhuman. Bless you.
I live in Indiana now. Fuck off. Deuce Stoltus.
I sent a super chat last episode. You poopy doody
heads did not read my chat. Our apologies. I
will now cast testy torsion on you to debuff
you all. Thank you. I'm sorry they didn't read
your chat. I wasn't there. I wouldn't have let
that happen. I'll beat Hal after this. Me? Iron
will strength. Another great topic, boys. Thank
you for the 20. Fulgrim was far from a Chad.
He was an overly crimped beta male before the
heresy. After heresy, he was the same with extra
arms and a bad skin condition. Lol joke. Eli,
have a good show, boys. Wow. You got called out,
buddy. You got called out. I love Fulgrim. I
love Fulgrim. Casual is casual. Thanks for the
full night's night, man. Hey, boys, just had
surgery today and recovering now. Thank you for
the great vibes. She billed on my tan till I
crawled. My man. My man. Thank you very much.
Hope you're doing all right, man. Hyperbolic
back hole. okay thank you really five dollars
i could take some of the prime works in a fight
by simply showing them that i have a proper relationship
with my father true that might be enough to end
it stable families uh for five spoiler warning
for owlcat rogue trader but the way to kill a
katana is to get a clone katana conscious and
convert it to worship the god emperor wow that's
actually what happens that's like uno reverse
card stuff going on there Shalaxy's wettest gripper,
remember, for 17 months. I weep for Hal's gaping
hole. Hope that will close up. Damn, I really
said those words with my mouth. I'm just saying,
Shalaxy, all of us are praying for Hal's gaping
hole to close. We're all praying every day. His
mouth? Not what I pray for, my guy. Not his mouth,
Eli. We'll tell you when you're older. Spooky.
Hey, man. I saw a picture of his Magnus. It was
really cool. No killing a T -Sun source. Dude
taking one look at you and you implode. GG. I
own a vacuum. I played Space Wind 2. I've killed
dozens of sorcerers. There you are, resident
Australian. Greetings from Australia, friends.
I'm in the same time zone as you, I think. Aussie
lore time. Work was dragged to a standstill this
week as we had a pair of venomous snakes hiding
inside a water tank. We had to repair. Crazy.
Australia is not a real country. Groynath. Great
name, Groynath. Member for 13 months. Hashtag,
you only take on a female Drukhari once. Once
is all I need. We've seen the videos. We've seen
them. That family guy bit. You know that'd never
work again in a million years. Don't need it
to, Brian. I don't think it's a gay drink. Mojito.
Good old Brian. Oh, have you guys read the...
Man, this is... No, no, no. Have I read? Yeah,
the book Semenology? No. It's cum cocktails.
You want a macho mojito? You can guess what makes
it macho. I don't want to be in this conversation
anymore. My day is ruined. Anyway. Where are
we on to next? The next one is Chaos Cultists.
That's the thing about Garzman. Most of them
are just impoverished dick dudes. We could take
one. Hal has killed a lot of impoverished people
in his time as part of the Amber estate. Now
I'm saying that under the heel of his family
estate, turning them into mulch for the garden.
Let me ask the question, Andy. Did you have a
bunk bed when you were growing up? Yes. Nice.
Okay, never mind. I had one too, actually. Because
I'm the oldest. Oh, I was the bottom bunk because
I'm the smallest. I was the youngest. I was younger.
I saw my old house when I was growing up a while
back, and I literally thought, wow, it was so
much bigger in my head. Yeah, sometimes we've
got family friends that we used to live in the
same street, and I'll drive by the old place,
and I was like, man, exactly what you said. I
was like, is it smaller? What happened? I can't
believe it. I promise it looks bigger in person,
said all of us. Putting a 50 pence piece next
to it like, look! So cultists are just like dudes
and they have some like chaos help, but also
chaos is very capricious, whereas a lasgun is
very reliable for the guard. So I want to say
that cultists would be easy to kill. Most of
them don't even have chaos help. Most of them
are just praying to chaos, but it doesn't do
anything. Maybe if one guy in the cult hears
a couple whispers every now and again, that's
usually how that goes. This is difficult, because
this could go from a chaos acolyte to some...
wretched rat who's drinking rainwater. We could
bean a guy in an alleyway, I think. In the interest...
Yeah, but it's like rainwater on a hive world,
so it's 90 % sulfur. Look, in the interest of
us getting an actual proper dub, I vote for second
guy, you know, chaos cultist who's made of like...
Cholera and sick. Yeah. Yeah, we shouldn't laugh.
Our foreheads in this call is crazy. It's not
my forehead, it's my whole head. He's like, big
head. He's like, big head. Five head looking
ass. Fifty head. I think the four of us could
be up. Yeah, I feel like in an alleyway, us with
just some like garrotte. One cultist. All I need
is a metal bat. We just need one metal bat between
us and we're fine. We need a cardboard box with
a sandwich and the little that snags it. And
then while he's in the box, you just hit him
with a rebar until he stops moving. Done. Honestly,
this is one of the most beautiful ones on the
list. If he doesn't permanently stay at the top
of A tier minimum, that's not good. Well, you
say that, Colin. What about an Administratum
collab? Alright, never mind. This guy would be
S tier. Wouldn't we get a medal for this? We
could 1v1. We could fight four of these in a
4v4. I feel like you could go for an Administratum
office. and kill multiple ones of them, and then
no one would stop you because they don't know
if you have clearance to or not. It's like, yeah,
I have a permit. It just says I can do whatever
I want. You could just feed them paper until
they choke, and that would do it. It's kind of
like punching an old person, though. It feels
really sinful. Look, look, look. They're imperial
bureaucrats. They're probably bad people to begin
with. Also, they're bureaucrats. Fuck the imperial
part. I hate the DMV. I hate the DMV. Kill them
all anyways. That's pretty safe, though. I'd
get a rage buff for this part of the fight. I
think about how I needed to go to the DMV seven
times to get my license. Oh my god. Seven is
a lot. I only took the test once. I passed it
first try. I had to go there seven times. Can
I rant about one thing? Go on, Hal. Can I rant
about one thing? Everyone here knows a gift card,
right? yes someone has ruined gift cards someone
has ruined gift cards for me and i actually screamed
because there's a gift card thing and now you
have to have an account on this website to unlock
the gift card but it doesn't work even if you
did that so i had to go through create like a
proper password and everything for this website
to unlock a gift card that doesn't work and only
for like 10 quid well was this like did you leave
it sitting in like a drawer for five years because
they know like soft expire all right in that
case this is a new thing i should not have to
have an account how to use a gift card i believe
there's a term for this and it's called and i
believe this is a thing yeah this reminds me
of when andy tried to buy me gears of war and
we had to jump oh yeah to get the microsoft store
to let me go Meanwhile, I got a free copy. What
is that next guy? Is that a naval breacher? This
is a navy breacher because I thought navy. Is
he more tough or is he easy? He's probably more
tough on average. You're only going to fight
them on a ship. You're never going to fight them
on land. There's more risk of being vented into
space. He's prepared for that. Average higher
quality than a guardsman. and he's got a big
shield yeah some guardsmen are kind of you know
yeah yeah has punched at least three old dudes
what about your your local priest what about
him he's got a chainsaw i've never i've never
read about these guys not described as being
like extremely muscular with random strength
that could just kill you. Bro, my vicar is jacked,
said Eli. Bottom of BT seems realistic. I think
we could 4v1, but I don't think we could. At
least two of us are going down, taking them out,
but I think we could do it. And this guy's got
like a mechanical hand. That's not Anakin Skywalker
style. That's not going to be fun. I don't get
backhanded by that. Shout out to that Jedi who
turned off Darth Vader's lightsaber with a cortosis
blade and then was informed he's still a seven
foot tall magical cyborg. And then he died. It's
also a Vader. And then he killed. Yeah. I've
got a question for you, Colin. Am I the only
one that feels like Darth Vader is the whore
of Star Wars these days because he's in everything
that he doesn't need to be in? He's in Obi -Wan's
show. He's in Fallen Order. He's in this. Bring
out Vader. Get him out. Put lipstick on him.
Come on. I think Star Wars is the whore of Star
Wars now. Vader specifically is like, hey, this
series sucks. Put Vader in it. This series is
already good. Put Vader in it. Andy, that's because
Star Wars is the dead horse which has gone beyond
beaten to death. It is continuously resurrected
and beaten until the fans go, oh, oh, they used
the droid that was in episode two. Yeah, but
then one out of ten things they produce are heaters,
so it's like, fuck. And I love the fact that
the Star Wars episode three merch of miniatures
all had Vader in the top corner. even though
he was only in like the last five minutes of
the movie so yeah we've got to put it on the
things for like story had me yeah why not well
he's darth vader he's pretty cool is the new
darth maul show goaded i saw the first time i
heard the ending but i don't know about the series
entire i've heard the end we're all the ending
is the kind of ending where like the next thing
they do with it will determine if it ruins the
first season retroactively Well, the problem
was the only thing that was good. There's only
one episode out of this show, right? No, it's
done. What? The trailer for, you know, like a
month ago, did they release all the episodes?
No, the trailer is months old. Yeah. And the
problem is, we already know how Darth Maul dies
because of Clone Wars. Rebels. So we know how,
so it's like, oh, there's no stakes. it's kind
of with andor as good as andor was like well
i know he's not gonna die because i watched rogue
one Yeah, it's like watching anything. Anything
in Star Wars is like, if the character's dead,
I don't necessarily need to know. I just want
to see Darth Maul kill people, bro. I just want
to see Darth Maul kill it. Also, look, sorry
to be a slop consumer, but I feel like the concept
of a prequel just being written off here entirely
is a little... No, no, no. I'm saying that. Yeah,
also that. The thing is, there's a difference
between a prequel and a prequel where you know
that the main character dies. specifically in
a certain scene that you've already seen. Yeah,
man, so... Siege of Terror sucks cock, right?
Siege of Terror is just... Yeah, but, like, most
of the characters... We don't know what happens
to, like, most of the Primarchs involved. We
don't know what happens to most of the characters
involved. We did! We did! We do! Every fucking
traitor! We know! It's just Darth Maul doing
stuff. That's why you want to watch the show.
Just because you know how he does. It lowers
the... risk in a scene, because I know Sigismund
is going to live. I know Abaddon is going to
live. I didn't know if other characters were
going to live. We don't know what happened to
Siobhan. We don't know what happened to Alderaan.
Other characters are going to live in the Darth
Maul show. Surely there's more than one character
in it. This is like Thing X Thing Japan. Thing
Warhammer. Anyway, we're getting distracted.
Could we kill a Psyker? Can we put that in B
tier? Because there's a 50 -50 shot they explode
us or they explode themselves. Well, that's what
we're doing here. Self -owned. Own goal, maybe.
Depends what kind of psyker. Because not all
of them are mind readers. Some of them just throw
rocks. Even if they are a mind reader, if that's
what their specialization is, great, you know
I'm going to punch you in the face. Do something
about it, dork. Then our heads explode and we
don't get close again. Yeah, but not every psyker
can just do that. Most of them can't. It depends
on what kind of psyker it is. If it's just like
John Astropath. Most of them have like schools
of thought, like not thought, but like psychic,
like there's a word for it, but I can't, field,
specializations, I'll go with that. If a guy
goes all in on the mind reading, he probably
can't throw fireballs at you. Yeah, he's just
good at interrogating. Should we put that in
there? top of b just because it's a guaranteed
kill i think i i'd say bottom t no yeah we still
might get unlucky on average it's a rough fight
but like your average psyker is not like even
like dawn of war like your average psyker is
like most people don't even know they are psychos
because most psychers aren't even like aware
they're psychos they're just like oh i kind of
have a presence i kind of i'm kind of lucky is
most psychers Statistically speaking, most psychers
are the grade above normal guy where it's like,
he's really good at poker. We don't know why.
He just always seems to do good. Was the next
one a Baneblade? I thought that was a Baneblade.
No. Colin, all I'm saying is all the guns are
facing forward. All we've got to do is jump on
the top and just drop a grenade in. Yeah, we
won't get close. Are you a Spartan? No, I'm just
a guy with a grenade. And I'm a perpetual, so
I could just be like... If we all run from each
side, if we all run at one side each, and me
and Eli get mowed down by all the fire, you're
still getting on the top. So what happens here
is the two of us on the left and the right get
riddled with holes. The guy in the front just
gets... evaporated. And then the one of us behind
it gets backed over. No, no, no. You can't do
all that. It's the whole thing of how do we get
born? There's a million sperm. You only need
one to procreate. Can I ask a question? There's
only four of us, bro. Do you think all of us
can reach? If you know what I mean. They're also
as big as a house. You're not climbing it. But
we can all agree that the cannon's not doing
much. It's not that slow moving. It's never going
to hit us. No, but we're not all going to be
sitting in a room. If we're clever boys and we're
like, we're ambushing this tank, you have like...
urban warfare. You could have buildings. It can't
aim that high up. If you're on the fourth story,
you could rappel down. You could do smoke grenades.
It'll just remove the building. With infinite
prep time, with infinite prep time, maybe we
could get away. Eli, Eli, Eli, I have something
to tell you. Are you aware of Batman? Yes. Batman
his superpower is preparation no but what is
Batman he's just a rich guy and we are immortal
whatever we want situations the question is can
we take a bane blade like it can only aim in
like one position with the main cannon the best
shot here is if we're immortal the bane blade
eventually runs out of gas and ammo We throw
our immortal bodies into the tracks and eventually...
This is C tier. It has to be C tier. It's just
a tank. It's a tank. It's below the dreadnought,
dude. This is a dreadnought. We're not taking
account of, like, camouflage or smoke grenades
or aerial attacks or laser beams or rocket launchers
or traps. It's just a tank. It's just a tank.
If the question is how many attacks would it
take us, it would take us more attempts than
a space marine. It's just a tank. A Spaceman
is a walking tank. A Dreadnought you could get
with one lucky rocket launcher shot. A Dreadnought
you can kill while it's asleep. Yeah, but a Baneblade's
way harder than a Dreadnought. You can kill any
of these people while they're asleep, basically.
A dreadnought is bipedal. It has a gun in each
hand and it can just crush you with its legs.
A tank, unless you're standing in front of the
treads, you can't get crushed. Yes, it has a
big cannon, but it's very directional. So it's
very slow moving. They don't need a big cannon
to kill us. We're just dudes. There's a guy on
the top of the cannon with a pencil -mounted
stubber. Can I get to Warpedia, please? Okay,
here we go. Baneblade cannon blast. Demolisher
cannon. Heavy stubbers. Laz cannon. Twin heavy
bolters. Twin heavy flamers. Armoured tracks.
What about elevation? If you attack it from a
second, third story, it can't aim up. Andy, I
think you're really overestimating us. Like that?
like like you do that you're gonna like the the
argument here is we've reduced ourselves to only
having to deal with a guy in a machine gun i'm
just saying if we're in like a in like a four
-story building either side and you drop down
you kill the gunner you just drop a grenade and
it's done can i ask the first level and the entire
building collapses and we die can i can i also
ask like a tertiary i think question Sure. How
strong do you think my legs are that I'm just
jumping out of a four -story building? No, no,
no, with like a rappel line that you have like
the, you know, the rope that you go... Tell me,
tell me with your asthma that we're going to
get that close to it. Yeah, but preparation,
you can draw it in. Andy, this is harder than
a space train. Human beings can kill tanks. Human
beings kill tanks. We could eventually, but we
would need a lot of prep time. And we have access
to all the guns in the setting. We have traps.
We have elevated buildings. We have ambush points.
It's just a tank. It's just a tank. We could
get a space marine. We could kill a tank even
in a space marine. No, we couldn't. Here's the
thing. A space marine is like a walking tank
with very few weak points. A tank, if you attack
it from the top, it can't do much. Andy, Andy.
The turret is going to do that. The turret is
going to shoot up. You are insane. Who's going
to shoot up 180 degrees in the sky? You attack
them from the top and you're done. It's a tank.
It's got weakness on the back. That's why they're
heavily armed at the front. Andy, have you ever
watched Saving Private Ryan? I have, yeah. Do
you understand that? You think you're the guy
in the sniper's nest? I've also played Mercenaries
on the original Xbox and a bunch of games where
you attack the tank from the top. And it's just
like a sitting duck. With what? With what are
we going to shoot at the tank? Wait, hold on.
Guys, guys, guys. Didn't we just mention earlier
we could have vortex grenades? One vortex grenade.
Tank gone. Easy. Can we please leave it here?
Alright, on that one he's kind of getting me.
Yeah. We got all the resources of Warhammer.
On that one, put everyone in like A tier. Yeah,
but a space marine could jump out of the way.
A tank can't jump out of the way. It's very slow
moving. If you think a space marine is winning
against a Baneblade, you are on crack. A space
marine did win against a Baneblade in Angels
of Death. Yeah, and two random schmucks on a
primitive world beat a space marine with sticks
once. Loads of space marines kill tanks all the
time. Happens all the time. Loads of random assholes
kill space marines. Okay. The next one is a sister
of battle. Sister of battle. Still in C tier.
Especially if she has power armor. Yeah. Miracles.
Imagine killing her and be like, we did it. And
then she gets up and be like, oh no. They're
never alone as well. There's always a group.
We're only attacking one at a time. That's the
whole. So four guys versus one woman. This is
like... No one was commenting on it until you
did. No one was going to say anything. With the
power of God. I feel like this is exactly where
Colin wants to be. That's the problem. Women.
Don't save me. The sister is silenced by the
custodian. Yeah. I have one point right? You're
a sister. You think I'm there. I'm over there.
This is what you do. You're a tank. You do this.
Oh my gosh. Have you ever tried to turn a tank?
It's really slow. I promise you that Baneblade
could move it. Yeah, but not rotating. I don't
know where else I'm going to find this, so you
know what? I'm just opening up lexicon. I play
Metal Gear Solid. You can crouch under a tank
and it can't hit you with a turret. We could
just shoot a Sister of Battle with bolt guns,
bro. Yeah, but she's heavily armed and she has
a bolt gun and a chainsaw. A Baneblade can hit
25 kilometers an hour. Doesn't matter if I'm
right next to it. You can't hit me if I'm under
your turret. If it fired its gun, you would go
flying. But you have to aim it. We need to move
on from the Baneblade. I can't get over the delusion.
Imagine you're fighting a lady with a magic sword
and you feel like you're going to have diarrhea.
Because the icky feeling. It's not just... We
can just shoot the sister in silence. It's easier
to shoot the sister. She's really heavily armed.
She's really heavily armed. Yeah, like Janisha
Kroll. She's like a blur. She's such a blimp.
She doesn't exist. This would actually be harder
than a custodian. Just like to even... like pin
them down like you how would you find we're dead
the moment they lock in either way the difference
is honestly hell i think you might be cooking
a custodian doesn't have an aura of my brain
hurdy around it yeah i think we're this is like
bottom of the sea like we this is pretty impossible
almost i think we have to get really lucky though
because like the whole time like our soul is
going to be hurting they sniped them in the thousand
sons book Because they're space marines. Space
marines. They're probably like 50 cows. For space
marines, yeah. Explosive 50 cows. We'd have to
get really lucky on that. I think that's still
harder. Maybe Cossodian's more difficult because
they would just move out of the way. It's more
difficult because we can't shoot it with as many
things. A sister, we could shoot it with more
things to kill her. I think maybe then... She
killed a something leaper, the Tyranid. Von Ryan.
We're not getting in melee with the lady. They
have flamers and bolters. What is that thing?
Is that the Von Ryan's leaper? Is that what we're
talking about? What is that thing? Well, the
next one. That's a skull. Oh, God. We're so fucked.
I'm just going to put that right here. But sister,
imagine trying to fight someone while you're
also vomiting and feeling ill. I think it's harder
than a space marine. That's harder than a space
marine. They're not fun. They're like custodians,
but also I want to say at least when you're fighting
a custodian, you're not having that when you
had a dream where you were only wearing your
boxes in front of a presidal or whatever it's
called in America. Andy, if you're fighting a
custodian, you don't see your death. Yeah, that's
why your sister is worse. Because you get to
suffer as it's going on. It's not about how bad
our deaths are. It's about how we could actually
do it. Sisters of Silence are toughness three
on the tabletop. They're a lot easier to kill
than the custodians. It is just a person. Okay.
You just have to shoot them. I'm telling you.
There's so many more guns that can kill a Sister
of Silence. I just feel like we are underestimating
the power of the you are in immense agony by
virtue of being an enemy. Imagine having PTSD
and diarrhea while you're trying to have a duel.
Even from a distance, trying to perceive them
from a distance, like your brain gets scrambled.
That's the issue. I hate the images I see coming
up. I fucking hate some of what you have on this
list. Police officer. Robocop. Nah, nah, nah.
Put it in C tier. I've played Payday 2. Cloakers
are motherfuckers, dude. The safe word is police
brutality, and they will be introducing you to
it. I feel like we could lead one of them into
a trap, though. Maybe... bottom of yeah we could
definitely get one like it's not comparable to
a dreadnought surely no but bottom would be bottom
would be for sure bottom would be yeah yeah like
we could fight on one before it's a hard but
it's an armored guy i feel like a psycho yeah
yeah psycho would be more difficult i want to
put the psycho a bit more than the priest to
be honest the real question is what takes more
tries the arbutus would take a small tries i
think i play dark tide they're pretty crazy uh
inquisitor oh well it's probably probably yeah
because they have a billion tools yeah yeah they've
got a whole lot of yeah top of seats here above
the dreadnought but like like everything lethal
danger just teleports are like a hundred feet
away I feel like the Inquisitors would be annoying
because the minute you make one attempt that
doesn't go well, they just go, nuke the planet.
I'm not taking any chances. That would be really
difficult. It's doable, but really, really tough.
Also, trying to lead an Inquisitor into a trap,
that's kind of the whole thing with them. They're
quite paranoid and investigators. Yeah, they
also have retinues. Rogue Trader. Yeah, Rogue
Trader. He's got a lot of money. Put him at the
top of B tier, honestly. I think we could charisma
our way into being part of the retinue and shank
him at the right time. I'm just saying, there's
a game called Rogue Trader where you play as
a rogue trader. They're pretty deadly, whereas
I've never played a game where you play as one
guardsman. Well, yeah, but that's Abelard. 90
% of the combat damage. Some rogue traders are
probably kind of lame and don't have nearly as
many friends. Yeah. Some of the Rogue Trader
dynasties are about to fall out. The Rogue Trader
Omnus is about one of them. Some of them are
not well off. Obviously well off compared to
Hive Scum. They get the war and they're like...
That's what I was looking at, Eli. I'm aware.
What's the next one? I believe that's a battleship.
Where are we putting the rogue trader? That's
fine. This is a battle barge. D! No! Wait, wait,
wait. Hit me out. I know where to hit the bayonet.
Wait, wait, wait. Shut your mouth. Wait, wait,
wait. Ready? Remember in the original Star Wars
film when Ben Kenobi just kind of snuck in and
he turned off the tractor beam? I feel like if
we were careful, we could just put a melter charge
on the generator and it would be... We're not
getting to the generator, bro! None of us are
Obi -Wan Kenobi. You see that guy in B tier?
You see that guy in B tier right below the guardsman?
He's killing us before we see anything. I don't
know. Unless you pretend to be a member of the
crew. What's that? It's like nothing. Is that
a melter charge? No. All I'm saying, Hal, is
remember when the Sarosh put a nuke on the Lion's
Gloriana -class ship, which was also moved by
Dark Angels? They discovered it, and it was a
whole legion of space marines. This is just like
a ship. There's no Primarch on this ship. You
explicitly said a battle barge. What the fuck
do you think is on a battle barge? A Gloriana
is bigger than a battle barge. And some, like,
bumblekins on Saurosh managed to sneak a nuke
on board, and it took two space marines to find
it amongst a legion of, like, hundreds of thousands.
We could sneak a nuke on us, Balbarge. In that
story, Andy, Luthor finds the nuke and then doesn't
tell anybody. It's true. Hal, what is Luthor?
A souped -up, enhanced dude. He's a first captain.
and what's the other guy he's a librarian no
no no i'm just saying a first captain and a librarian
from a space marine legion not even a chapter
if we were just like on a navy ship we could
manage it it's just guys it's just some guys
one way i actually think we could do this we
go for the gather field somehow Yeah, that's
what I was thinking, but how would you get there?
It's guarded. It's a 100 % We'd have to work
our entire lives to get to the point where we're
like security there or something. Like 10 lives!
If it's an entire life endeavor that takes us
multiple deaths to do, I think it's still D tier.
This is D tier. Me versus Battle Barn. I just
like this comment here. If you want us to be
kind about this, you mad man. Please put it in
D tier. This is honestly like I'm just saying
I'm a dreamer. I like to inspire and inspire
people. I like to think the best of people. I
want to say that they can go beyond. I want to
say that people can do more than they think they
can. They can achieve more than they ever wished.
I don't want to tell people they can or can't
do anything. I think they can do anything if
they put their mind to it. Navigator. This is
not Shawshank Redemption. This is not the little...
It's in D2. It's in D2. I'll put it at the bottom
of C. No! We gotta move on. He has control. Navigator.
Don't look in her eye. Before we get any further...
Let's just do the Navigator really quick. Okay,
I get that. B. It's a lady. Or a dude. Hard to
access, though. Don't look at him. Don't look
at him. Do the thing when you're three years
old fighting with your sibling, just swing your
arms. If you're in my way... If your form was
Jump to Navigator, we would kill them, no problem.
I want to say Top of B because they're not meant
to fight people. It'd be really difficult to
get to them. Yeah, but when you get to them...
I think sometimes they're still kind of enhanced
just by psychic strength. Or use a grenade. they
would just unleash the third eye and just be
like yeah that's that's where you go and then
you throw it away don't worry about it okay we'll
give them that we'll give them a hat or give
them a scarf like in some of the books they just
cover their eye while they like bludgeon them
um yeah one guy goes to the eye everyone else
just beat them to death the eye of sarah um yes
first of the donations from SleepyBoyH50 for
five. I was alone over in mobile chat, so I'll
say this here. Colin better hope nobody they
fight has any sharpened candy games. Awesome.
My first live stream. Welcome. Good to see you,
man. I've been trying to abolish the freaking
mobile stream, but my words have not been heeded.
I'm just saying, we did a poll. and it was not
conclusive it was like 55 said no i think oh
my gosh you can check you can check all right
let's let's let's let's go on oh it's just a
townsend again you'll see man uh well friends
last super chat for today as i i a crap ton of
work uh but to do more but aussie law did you
know that if you leave your cars unused long
enough king brown snakes in brackets, highly
venomous snake will make it theirs. That sounds
fun. Thank you. Wow. Wow. Sounds like a tough
place to live. I got to be honest. I'm like,
I don't want to deal with snakes and, you know,
kangaroos. Kangaroos can kick you really hard.
It's like, you know, like people when they get
kicked by a horse, that sounds painful. Kangaroos
do that because they just talk. Yeah. Yeah. No,
thanks. What is gripper? Does Eli love his wife?
Colin's still gay. More at five. Thank you. What
do you mean by that? That's a peak donation.
I do love that. What do you mean by that? What
do you mean by that? What do you mean by that?
$20 with Deltas. Thank you very much. Wow. Oh,
Eli, I think this is... Oh, no, there's a...
Here's for both of us. I could tell Eli was in
the mystical land of Japan when I saw the Calpico.
I don't... What is that? I think that's the marmot
that my wife won from the claw machine. I see.
Anyway, happy to catch a live show for the first
time, even if I am at work. Happy to have you,
Chief. Colin solos by stabbing people with insulin
or depraved gooner tactics. I ascend to Slaanesh
Demon Princehood on the spot. I like to imagine
in Resident Evil Requiem when you stab them with
the cure and they pop. That's what happens when
Colin stabs them with the insulin. They just
go... I like the invincible memes every time
there's no new season because now we're up to
animatics of Mark violently jerking off on Frag.
Wow. Wow. Hippokingmp3. That's a hell of a name.
For 10 bucks. Thanks, man. Sorry for doing it
late. It was fighting a crud. God, he must be
ancient now. Keep up the awesome content. I've
been binging it all week. Thanks, man. Appreciate
it. Good seeing you, man. Cronzonor for five.
Would you rather every item you eat be slightly
frozen in the middle or have a boiling hot small
pocket in the middle? They always remain... I
would have the second because then I could just
flip it around and just leave it until it cools
down. Well, no, it'll always remain this temp.
I'll just throw it in the bin. Yeah, at that
point, I would just accept at least 10 % of my
meal. I'm just never going to eat. How would
that work with ice cream? Or like soup. I like
cheesecake. Can I use this to form a perpetual
energy source and become infinitely wealthy?
Colin becoming the Tony Stark of the modern age.
I found cold fusion, but it's hot fusion. Amazing.
Calico soda is the drink. It's a spooky kabuki.
Thanks, man. We can kill a Baneblade. This isn't
regular. In my defense, right. What is a Baneblade?
Yes, it's a very impressive tank. Where a tank
is a mass -produced weapon of war. And every
weapon of war has weaknesses. You could ambush
a tank. It's not just a tank, bro. It's a Baneblade.
It's a big tank. It's an enormous tank. It's
designed to look like 1V500. Right. It's not
a battleship. It's not an aircraft. You don't
have to worry about being up here. You don't
have to worry about buoyancy and being massive.
It's a tank. As long as you can get the hatch
open and drop a grenade in, you're done. No.
All I'm going to say is what's in a tank? A lot
of fleshy people. One grenade. It's too big.
You can get it open. Open a big tin of tuna.
It's fine. Don't worry about it. Thank you very
much for the $5. I love Andy's complete unearned
confidence on taking on a Baneblade. It's wild.
Attack it from above. You can't defend from above.
It's a tank. It literally can't. No, it can't.
VoidDonnie3848 for 10 bucks. They got me working
overtime so I missed the last couple of streams
and I caught up with all the episodes. Thank
you, man. Also, why do you all move the donuts
on the remaster? It was so funny. Ah, that's
because that's only in a live exclusive. And
remember, you can watch all of the Raw Cuts via
Discord where there is a channel and you can
just watch them all from there as well. So you
don't lose anything. it's still on youtube yeah
it's just you get the click on discord for the
for the for these video watchers only because
it's it's more conclusive yeah but people complain
they didn't like it as much because it takes
too long but it's still there if you want to
watch it andy thinks his last name is so true
all we will wear green hat in two weeks thank
you for the two better put that in your calendars
i'm also here thank you for being here we will
wear green what is the reference eli with hanma
baki bakian oh i've watched uh yeah grappler
baki lol um i like the guy who was just like
pressure points pressure points pressure because
that's how you take out a bane blade because
you do pressure points you find the weakness
and you strike it anyway um back to the tier
list uh mechanicum now bear in mind this could
be a skitari this could be a um Let's just say
it's a tech priest. Tech priests are usually
pretty kitted out. I put bottom of B tier at
best. Yeah, bottom of B tier. Bottom of B or
top of C. Yeah. It's easier. It's a Titan and
then a Knight. It's just a Titan. I'm just saying
with this information, if you can overload their
sensors, they are... easy prey and we've seen
this many times the scrap code i'm just saying
like what if you could be like do you possess
that skill andy i'm saying what if we overload
their systems with like porn and like six seven
seven videos on loop and then it's like oh i
can't target them there's so much influx of data
people be boop and then you shoot them defeating
this guitar because i've looped the entirety
of skivity toilet at once i mean colin If you
haven't read Mechanicum, that's basically what
happens. But instead of being 6 -7, 6 -7 is 0
-1 -0 -1. I think we can keep it a B tier where
it is. This is the Legio Mortis from the Titans.
I'm not going to lie, this is much more difficult
than a Tonk. Oh, really? But Andy, it turns slowly.
Yeah, no, it turns, yeah. Yeah, but the difference
is there's like hundreds of crew members inside.
At Tonk, there's like three, four guys, maybe
five. There's just like hundreds of people inside.
There's like 20 dudes in a Beyblade. 20 guys
who are like cramped in. This is like a walking
cathedral. They're not cramped in. They're bigger
than any tank we have on Earth. Why is the ship
in seats here? You tell me. What's the big tank
that's in Halo 4 that the Infinity drops in?
I don't remember the name of it. Well, you know
what I mean. That's bigger than a Baneblade.
Just put the ship in D tier, please. But yeah,
Titan, I don't know how it would be in a Titan,
to be honest. Somehow easier than a ship, but
same in D. No, it's harder than a ship. The further
down you go, the harder it gets. Can we put the
knight next to the Titan? I want to say... Because
a Titan is only, like, one pilot. A Titan only
has one guy in it. Sorry, a Knight has one guy.
A Titan has multiple. A Titan is just one guy
in a chair. A Knight is probably easier than
a Titan, yes. I mean, yeah. It's still impossible.
And the difference with, like, an Assassin, if
you kill him, he blows up. That's not good. And
also, the Assassin could be a Kalidus and pretends
to be, like, a relative. A Titan, if you can
get inside... It's just a guy in a chair. And
if you kill him, he's just an empty Titan. How
are you getting inside the night, bro? Well,
that's where... Eli, how are you getting in the
Titan? That's what I want to know. I don't know.
I'm not! Eli, Eli, Eli. Here's an answer. You
wait until the Titan pilot goes to sleep and
you kill him in his sleep. We should make one
stipulation. One stipulation that makes this
whole thing. The person we're targeting knows
we're targeting them. That's what makes it fair.
Oh, well, now we can't do it. But now we can't
do it. Now we can't do anything. Like, all of
these rely on surprise. This navigator now has,
like, hundreds of guards. This cultist is now
in, like, the heart of his cult. The Knight's
a lot easier. He has so many typewriters defending
him now. It's not fair anymore. Okay. We can
leave the Knight there. That's fine. Okay. What's
the next one? Demon Host. Oh, we're fucked. Z
tier again? Even if we kill it, there's even
odds the demon goes away or then pops out. We
have to deal with that. You can't kill a demon
host. You can only temporarily banish it. I mean,
how? With a demon, you can kill the host. You
get a Fulgurite and kill one. If we have Fulgurite,
where can we get it? Are you like Lex Luthor
or Fulgurite over here? Hal, Hal, Hal. What if,
right, between the four of us, we borrow the
Emperor's sword, right? And we shrink down to
like man's size, right? And then... There we
go. We're not swinging the Emperor's sword. Andy,
can you, yeah, can you, can you, can you like
point at yourself like this? Yeah, close enough.
The grin was a bit too friendly and not cocky
enough, but you know how it works. A bit too
friendly. Okay, we're going to put a demon host
at the bottom of C. Because technically it's
a body. We would all get munched, but we could
do it. So top is C. Bottom is harder. Yeah, it's
harder than a custodian, I think. Can we kill
a servitor? Yeah. I think I got the servo skull.
No problem. Bear in mind, they have a lot of...
Oh, they can aim up. Oh, are we sure? Are we
sure? Are we sure we're ambushing him properly?
All I'm saying is, bear in mind, there are servitors
who are like a skull, and then there's gun servitors.
Andy, are you one of those guys who looks like
this? I'm just saying, like, we're being like,
oh, whenever Andy makes a good point, we'll just
take the extreme. And then when it's a servitor,
it's just, oh, it's just a silly skull. It's
just a terrible... It's a big, terrible skull!
Well, that's representative of servitorization.
But, like, you can have servitors who are meniores,
but also... combat you can you can hit me if
you want but i'll still love you andy oh are
you familiar with the fact that people discuss
a hundred versus one counterpoint counterpoint
how have you ever seen the movie crank with jason
statham of course not yeah I'm basing every interaction
I have in this tier list as if I was Jason Statham
in Crank 1 or 2. It's not happening. It's not
happening. Oh, my God. Well, isn't this one an
Orc? Yes. The next one's an Orc. This could be
a Warboss. This could be a Nob. This could be
anything Orky. It depends. Just in B tier, I
think. Guardsmen 1v1 Orcs sometimes. They can
rip you to shreds. Well, I mean, they do. Little
guy. An orc boy we could fight with enough luck.
Above that tier it gets really hard. It's easier
than a tech priest. It's definitely easier than
a tech priest. Up to a knob you could gaslight
into doing something stupid. I think after that
they're cunning enough that it's like alright
I might hate you to actually just fight them.
Depends if we all had like a real lasgun or bolt
gun or something we could all just have one lucky
shot even if you shoot a las gun you hit him
anywhere other than the like middle of the between
the eyes he's not stopping orcs is terrifying
no i'm not saying it'll be clean but i think
we could all it's not as easy as a bane blade
but orcs 4v1 we could do it Yeah. If we wanted
an Orc boy, we could definitely do it. Although,
Hal is right. Eli, there is the guardsman 1v1ing
the Baneblade, not shown as the 100 offscreen
1v1ing the Orc and getting ripped apart. Orcs
can aim up. Orcs can do this. Baneblades don't
have arms. Okay, the next one is S tier. We could
freaking... How? Are we factoring in the multiple
red gobos that exist? It's just one Gretchen.
I'm telling you, we could kick to death a Gretchen
if we... One Gretchen, four of us? Yes, put it
in S tier. We'd enjoy it. We would hold him by
all of his limbs and tear him into four pieces
because Gretchen is deserving. We would put him
on a barbecue and rotisserie him. Let us know
in the comments how you would eviscerate a Gretchen.
Tell me how you'd do it. I'm not going to lie.
Catan Shard is kind of tough. I'm going to put
him next to the F. It's impossible. That's pretty
fair. I think a Necron Lord is also C tier. That's
D tier. We're never killing a Necron Lord. It's
very... Again, even if the Necron Lord is sleeping,
what are we going to do? Even if we have a big
gun, it's still probably going to stand back
up. You can hit it hard enough with a melter.
A Necron or a Catan? The Necron, not the Catan.
Eli, remember the time when Helbrecht crunked
Emotech several times and he was just like, respawn,
respawn. Calm down with your cheat codes, mate.
I mean, that's bullshit. All right. Well, we
made ourselves immortal for this. So I don't
know if we have any stones to throw at the department.
I want to be like, they'd be more of a pain than
an assassin. Because an assassin blows up as
a pain. They respawn. They disintegrate you and
they respawn. and time travel also also also
chad hellbrick actually got bodied by the by
the necron uh in the novel in the novel it's
much better than it's probably top of seats here
we could kill could we could kill a gaunt the
rippers but anything above a gaunt like even
four or whatever the non -queen guards are they're
not fun Someone said I'd - Mike said I'd omni
-man that thing. What did you mean? This is Gene
from the Steelers. Gene's not so bad. That's
just like a guy. It's just a dude. It is just
a dude. With a lot of zealotry. Harder than a
Chaos Cultist, for sure. It's like a guardsman.
Yeah. Like, top... It's the same deal. Alright,
let's put Tau right here. No, no. We have to
be armed to the teeth to kill a gore. Your average
fire warrior guy is not much different than your
average guardsman. Alright, hold on. Eli, you're
not counting the air cast or the water cast here.
Oh my gosh, this is the entire Tau species? I
could thunder kick a gun. We could kill a water
test guy. I'm just saying, I ain't seen no buff
Tau anywhere. I've seen Lean Maxing, what's his
name? I can't even remember his name. Oh, they're
all scrawny fish people with hooves. They are
basically just guardsmen with better weapons
and slightly slower reaction times. Unless you're
an air cast and then you're like slender. I'm
pretty sure we could all take one. Well, yeah,
we could, but it's in the same, like, spot as
the guardsmen. Yeah. But Eddie's saying this
is the entire Tau species, so we get to pick
and choose who we get to kill, I guess. Well,
then, yeah, if we're beating the shit out of
an Aircast member, then sure, S tier. And, like,
Ethereals. Our Ethereals like the Prophet of
Regret. We can just pummel them to death with
your fist. Slowly. Yeah, but they make it. We
can only take half of the Tau species easily.
Even Earthcasts are pretty tough. Are they? We
fight honor duels all the time. We could kill
a water cast. Yeah, but like four of us versus
one earth cast. Yes, we could beat up a civilian
engineer. They should just go to like next to
the guardsmen. Yeah, yeah. There we go. Voting,
I'm going to put in like I'm going to put him
above a bane blade. Because I don't want to mess
with these guys. Because their center of gravity
is lower, therefore they have muscle mass and
stock and AI and tech. There are no weak Votan.
They're all muscly dudes who are like four foot
ten. Yeah, but we're four guys. We could take
one. One foot per person. And they have really
good tech and armor. And they have awesome coats.
I'm losing my mind. You are a madman. I think
it's about as hard as killing an orc, to be honest.
Yeah, if it's just one Votan, if he's not in
power armor, we can do it. I don't want to fight
a photon and not power. It's not about want.
It's about need. You need to finish the job.
I don't need to fight a burly man who's 4 '10
and is all muscle fibres. We've got one coming
up later. He'll red mist me. He'll turn me into
mulch. I don't want to be that. It's bottom of
B, at least, surely. Yeah, it's got to be bottom
of B. I know that thing. He's going to hit hard.
No, it's bottom of B. Whatever, bro, whatever.
Fine, I will accede to your silly... I don't
want to fight a monkey. They're strong. Monkeys
can kill you. But I think we could one before
a monkey. We could one before a Joe Carroll.
No, we couldn't. You could 1v1 a monkey, but
I think you could 1v4 a monkey. You couldn't
10v1 that monkey. That monkey's going to mess
you up. To be fair, he does likely have digital
weapons. He probably has Halo shields. Hear me
out. This is worse than a sister of battle. Maybe
not as bad as a space marine. Yeah, I'd agree
with that. He's terrible. This guy... if we assume
he has a force field so we can't shoot him he's
worse than a bane blade because at least he has
like tech he's not like fighting he's like i
have weird like technologies i have like gravity
fists and i have like shielding and i have like
ocular sense like you can't sneak up on him because
of his eyeballs he's strong as hell and that's
just because he's monkey like jakara will rip
you i want to put him above i'm doing that i'm
doing that yeah that's good What's the next one?
Slayer. Slayer? What a random thing to put on
the list. No, they're in Rogue Trader. Calm down.
I did this for you, Eli. I did this for you because
you love Xenos and now you're having a go at
me. Sorry. I've only seen them in Fulgrim. I
haven't played Rogue Trader. It's also occurred
to me Andy did not put an Eldar on the list.
Oh, shit. Sorry. Once again, many such cases.
My bad. My bad. I'm not going to even... I got
to pee. I got to pee. We are back. Just a minute.
Wow. This list is long. I'm going to mute his
mic because he's going to hear the whole thing.
No, I'm joking. All right. What's your opinion
on the layer? Probably like top of C, the bottom
of B. Aren't they really big? They're tall. They're
like eight foot, I want to say. I'd say C -tier
somewhere. I don't fancy my chances. I think
it's worse than a Space Marine, honestly. These
things move fast, forearms, technology, weapons.
We're kind of screwed. Worse than a Space Marine.
Yeah. And also some... Drukhari. Oh, God. See?
Put them right there. Is that worse than a Sister
of Silence? I'm just saying, if a Sister of Silence
kills me, I die. If I lose to a Drukhari, I don't
die quickly. Yeah, we're becoming furniture.
And if we were perpetuals in this instance, it's
not going to be a fun time. So you're saying
we've got one shot. Yeah, they've also got crazy
weaponry. At least the weapons the sisters and
whatnot have, it'll just blow your arm off or
kill you. The Dark Elder are making you convulse
in agony on the spot. I think maybe Bottom of
Sea is pretty good, because that makes sense.
Harlequins. I'm just going to put them like there.
Surely killing one Harlequin... Oh, no. There
must be a scenario where we could interact with
one, at least. No, no. They're wise. They're
street smarts. They know everything. Also, if
it's just like a... Sorry. Oh, no, no. You, sorry.
I was going to say, like, some of these guys,
the solitaires, they're like Norman spirit stones
for laughs to vanguard their souls against. I'm
not messing with them. They're crazy. No. Also,
if it's just a random Harlequin, there's a non
-zero chance you're going to fight Kegarek. Yeah,
that's not happening. What are we doing right
now? Harlequin. We just did Harlequin. He's just
below Primarchs. Yeah, right. That's fair. See?
See? Aspect Warrior. Eldar. because this goes
everywhere from like a farseer to an aspect warrior
to a poet like where do we go the poet could
freaking obliterate you though probably i mean
you know path of a poet guy four of us could
probably maybe jump well the thing is he's probably
like oh by the way i was an aspect warrior for
20 years and also i was like he's like oh it
was one of my 10 years like oh You don't want
to mess with a hobbyist. Or a dreamer guy. We
could jump a dreamer guy while he's sleeping.
But aside from some cherry -picked options, it's
pretty tough. Is this worse than a Space Marine?
No. Probably not. Worse than a Jakero? No. I
want to put it under a Jakero. I was waiting
for an outcry from Colin there, but it didn't
come. I'm a bit like, oh. Funny monkey. If we're
including civilian Eldar, we could 4v1 a civilian
with trouble, but it's potential. We could take
on an Eldar child. Yeah, one flamer. Maybe. And
to be fair, from what I've read, sometimes the
Eldar who aren't named are just kind of like
cannon fodder. Even the Aspect Warriors were
like, oh, what are you? I'm a Dar Avenger. It's
kind of dull. It's like vanilla ice cream. At
the end of the day, we get to shoot a Guardian,
even if it's in a warfare scenario. Guardsmen
got to do it, so we can do it. Yeah. Before we
get any further, do we have a few more? I think
there's a few. Who do we have? No one knows.
You want to read the first one? You want to read
it out? Sure. VoidDonnie3848. Five bucks. Thanks,
man. Usually watch at work because it was getting
me through the day. Thanks for telling me about
that much. Appreciate it. Jesus, thank you, man.
We appreciate it. You sent a few earlier. Thank
you, man. Thank you. Extra medium. A bane blade
isn't just a tank. It's an apartment complex
with cannons. We're trying. All I'm saying is...
You know what they have? You know what they have
in similarity to an apartment block complex?
You can run around it. You can't attack from
the top. You go from the top down. There are
guns that go up and down. They go like that.
They don't go like this. They go like that. A
pencil -mounted bolter does this, and then it
stops. The turret does that, and you can't attack
from the top. In the Tao book, a barracuda flies
and the Baneblade shoots at the barracuda. It
does that. That's why when it's going through
an urban complex, you jump from the buildings.
I've seen movies. And his crank bit makes so
much sense now. Thanks, Donkey Man. I'm cranking
it. Kibanda's mighty schlong with the fiver.
On the topic of grots and gaunts, I'd like to
remind everyone at the time a grunt ripped a
dude open with his bare hands. True. Yeah, but
halo grunts are like arthropods that are designed
for digging tunnels. And they're silly gooby
guys. They're fun. We love grunts. Handy intakes
will enrage me endlessly. book and quantum whatever
says gav thorpe could solo the azeriani and he
already has i thought that was a funny comment
uh anyways we have owned by prime one jew of
jr for five bucks thank you man andy having more
respect for monkey than tongue is something i
did all right all right all right you guys take
the mic where i don't know my xenos law let's
not forget jokero are an old one creation and
they're tech savvy that is also very true Of
course I respect them more than Tonk. It's just
a Tonk. You can't replace Jokero. It's just a
Tonk. It's just a tank. You're fucking mad. It's
like a lasgun. Imagine Andy is your freaking
military commander and he's fighting you. You're
an infantry division and he sends you against
the entire Panzer division. You're on the beaches
of Germany. Handle it, big dog. You got this.
You got mud to deal with. You got fuel to deal
with. You got supply lines to deal with. You've
got terrain. You've got the air force to deal
with. Tongs are cool, but tongs aren't everything.
You need to have a varied approach to warfare.
Tongs are great on the ground, but also they
can't shoot from the back. They're usually very
lightly armored from the back, and also you can
attack from the top. Tonk is great, but it's
not everything. Can't win with just Tonk. I know
what we're doing next time there's a Lorecrimes
meetup. Andy's going to fight a tank and we'll
watch. I'll go to the tank museum and I'll just
destroy all the tanks with a spam. It will run
you over instantly. Unless I just walk around
it. It's fine. It's slow on the thing. Okay.
Of Phantom Pain, thank you for $4 .99. Just teaching
Jokero the inner workings of the Imperium's bureaucracy
and that problem will take care of itself. Very
true. We love Tom. What's his name? Arvin Land
had a Jokero because he was cool. Arkin. Arkin
Land? Yeah. He had a fake monkey. He had a monkey.
His monkey had a tail which he was like, it's
clearly used as a stinger. Because he didn't
realize it was like a... What else would the
tail be used for? Yeah. And he needs to leap
from three stories onto a moving vehicle so she'll
access what is gripping. That's why you have
repel right there. You nail it to the ceiling
and you repel down. What am I looking at? What
is that next thing? This is a slaw. I don't want
to frick with this. No, I don't want to fight
the worm that walks. I'm going to say that's
worse than the titan. Hey, you know what's worse
than me crunking you? You're going to be a pensioner.
Like, oh, how dare you? And this is about how
difficult it is, not how painful this is. I'm
not going to just leave you. You're going to
have more back pain. I think this is doable because
this is... more doable than an Eldar, even, because
an Eldar will be hard to shoot. It moves fast,
whereas this thing doesn't move as fast. You
could shoot this. It has four of us. Yeah. We
could do it. Yeah, just, I think, above a sister,
below an Eldar. Do we know what the range is
on their time dilation powers? I think it would
be pretty close. It's not like... The thing is,
if they're... more of them together. No, that's
the Hrudd, isn't it? The Slaw don't do that.
Also, if we're perpetuals, aren't we immune to...
Oh, true. Wait, this is not a Hrudd. Yeah, a
Hrudd is the one with the time. They're the worms.
They're the worm people. They just have access
to, like, crazy technology, and they're terrifying.
Yeah, Hrudd is just instant. No, we can't. Is
the next one an old one? Or is it a Slaw? No,
it's only a Slaw. Well, it's still D tier. It's
still D tier. I feel like it'd be easier to kill
than a Spaceman. Yeah, I'll put my worm in you.
I don't think it's D tier. A Custodian is much
harder than a Sloth. Yeah, C tier. Below a Spaceman.
Alright, now we got the fraud. The lanky boys.
This is bottom of D. Because we'd have to like...
get access to some serious gear yeah so top of
d you mean hell top of these are yeah top of
d no no no like top as in like not the other
side yeah i'm just saying how it's harder they
don't have armor necessarily but like we couldn't
get close like at all but here's the thing like
i'm assuming that like alonius pious and stuff
they don't when they regenerate become 20. they
become the age they died at so do you really
want to like survive against this guy and then
be like i'm 80 i have back pain every time i'm
resurrected and if we fail the first time we
have to fight him again and again again it's
going to be more work i mean alonius is like
40 isn't he he's not a young but that's is that
just because he died the first time when he was
40. I don't know. I'm like, if you die when you're
a perpetual, does that time lock you to that
age? So therefore, if you fight a Harad and you
become a hundred, then you're time locked to
being a hundred. And then if you keep dying,
then you basically just be like a prune. If you're
a true perpetual, I think, well, true perpetuals,
because like Drongomachus is not a real, like
he's a fake one. They make artificial ones. Like
he's one made by someone else, by the Kabbalah.
But I think most of them just are like. around
like whatever guess is like middle age i just
all look middle age but yeah so i think yeah
you don't age but again like you who know when
perso rabo fought them he started aging so yeah
i don't know he's not perpetual technically they're
quite hard to see as well like all like all your
weapons like me and colin did a episode that
would come out on lodgecast where like even if
you try and shoot them with like a bolt gun like
it doesn't explode because the bullet ages so
any pretty difficult like grenades don't go off
or yeah like half the weapons they used against
them just like short -circuited because the components
in them melted oh i see dog poor russell while
we're talking about how time works when the fraud
is there like ends my suffering sorry um yeah
i think we bought it like the very top of d sorry
the very next to the ship next to the freaking
ship yeah okay uh slon d to your world d d death
yeah ligament balls put it by the emperor to
be or a katana shard to be honest it's equivalent
to a primark probably yeah like maybe worse if
it's like a first gender like if lord croak is
coming dude put him below the fucking emperor
yeah it's pretty like you're probably thinking
like it's just a toad on a chair that is the
most powerful like That may have ever existed.
You are not getting close. Any plan you've ever
thought of has already been thought of by him.
He has foreseen your efforts 10 ,000 years ago
and let them happen because it would be funnier
to just... You spend the last 1 ,000 years contemplating
how to make your balls hurt when he crushes them
with his psychic powers. That's what's on my
mind right now. It's like trying to beat the
computer on chess .com. It's just not happening.
Men of Iron. What about Men of Iron? Can we kill
a Men of Iron? It's a robot. We need a big gun,
and we can do it. Yeah, that's pretty doable.
He's not going to be like, that just stops us.
It's just, do we have a rocket launcher, basically?
Yeah. I guess maybe one man of iron. I'd say
lower on B tier, though. Like, they were crazy,
like, dark. It's going to need to be one hell
of a rocket launcher. That's where, like, the
very bottom would be, I think. Yeah. Yeah, there
we go. What about an Ordonatus platform? The
last of the 4K. What? Can we kill an Ordonatus
platform? What the fuck? Yeah, I think we can.
How? I don't even know what to ask. Is anyone
on it? Is it true? All right, then no. That's
basically all the 40k stuff. How big is this
turret? Oh, it's like a building. it's like the
biggest thing the mechanic has had oh okay i
wasn't listening it's an ordinary artist it's
like remember in hell's reach when that one thing
killed like a god definitely easier than a bane
blade all we need it's a building that doesn't
move right no it doesn't move and there's like
a bajillion people on it yeah it's like a fortress
it's like a walking fortress I'm going to level
with you. This is a 2v3. I'm helping him. Colin
picks up cameras and beans me. Remember in Streets
of Rage 2 when you got to the final boss and
then the final boss is like, hey, you can kill
me together or you can betray each other and
become the king of the city. Colin just did that
to me. Yeah, but I'm not betraying Carl. I'm
switching teams. I'm changing to red team. You
put him lower than that. Realistically. He had
an ability where he could set his stats and everything
to 10 for a turn. He's gonna fucking kill you.
And that was in Warhammer Fantasy. I'm just saying,
Colin, the next step is, can he age me to the
point where I need wrinkle cream? No, he'll just
hit you with the literal hammer of God. Yeah,
but like, this guy will kill me, but he'll make
me look bad before he does it. Oh, Hamba. I look
fine. C tier. C tier. Okay. Is he worse than
a Drukhari? No. Bro, D tier. Bro, what? Bro.
We're not being there. Let's not kill us. I'm
going to put them there. Is Karl Franz worse
than a Drukhari? Really? Yeah. He's a dude in
armor. Yeah, but he's really cool. No. Okay.
No, stop moving him up. Stop it. No, stop it.
Stop it! You have to convince me, Cullen. You
have to tell me why. Because he's got the hammer
of God. It just fucking kills you. What do you
mean? And I think you have to say you're limited
to the technology of the Warhammer fantasy universe.
We can't bring the rock and want to shoot it.
He's got Garamrel armor. That's dwarf super armor
that you can't penetrate. No, no, no. Back it
up. I'll put him above a custodian. There you
go. Above a demon host. Here's the thing, Colin.
I can imagine that Carl Franz would wreck our
shit, but he wouldn't make a lamp out of us.
No, he would not lampify us. I'm putting him
there, if that's okay with you. Alright, that's
fair. Old man. He's just kind of old. He's magical.
He lives through a god -tripping feeling. I think
he's kind of goaded. Yeah, but he does because
Krell was with him. Yeah, but he's also a ghost.
He's not a ghost. He's the Lich Master. He's
not a ghost. Have you ever seen Ghostbusters?
We'll cross the streams. He's not a ghost, but
his wargear makes him ethereal, so you can't
actually hit him with non -magical weapons. So
first we need a magical weapon to even touch
the guy. And then we have to deal with him casting
freaking spells and raising. I think he's harder
than Carl Franz, bro. He can just make an army
of zombies up here. Technically, the Empire stands
between us and Carl Franz, whereas Heinrich Kemmler
is just a dude in a shack, probably. He also
has Krell. I think that could just be assumed.
Yeah, one of us could distract Krell for a moment.
Oh my gosh. For exactly as long as it takes for
the axe to come down, we can distract Krell.
That's crazy. If Goshen and Felix couldn't do
it, how are we going to do it? I'm telling you,
me and Colin get emotional by Krell. It's like
it's a knockout punch to the old man. Here comes
Deadless and the Dark Gods with a steel chair.
You know I could punch an old man hard enough
to kill him. Where are we going? This is Archeon?
Yeah, I think that's a reasonable place to put
the Lich Master. Archeon. I mean, that's also
impossible. Yeah. Above a Slan, though. It's
probably just below a Primarch. Yeah. Maybe he's
about as bad as a Primarch, to be fair. Let's
put them one above. Why not? Stormcasters. I
mean, in the most technical definitions of things,
we can't. Space Marines. Yeah, that's fair. There's
Space Marines. If we're limited to the universe's
stuff, we only have bows and arrows. That does
make it significantly harder. But every person
in their army is four. What? Shoot lightning.
Oh, they're Thor. I thought you said four. I
was like, huh? No, not four. Oh my god, the next
one. A singular Skaven? No, we can beat the shit
out of that thing. We could S -tier. Coltis or
Skaven? S -tier. S -tier. I'm telling you, one
Skaven. We could beat the shit out of that thing.
Wait. Administratum or Skaven? No. No, I draw
the line at administration. It's harder than...
Listen, one of us might get chomped on the neck.
Yeah, one of us is getting killed and one is
probably getting raped. One of us is getting
rabies, but the rest are okay. The rest of us
can kick the shit out of it. I like how solitary
the cultist is here. They are weaker than an
ordinary person, so we could honestly one -punch
it. Seriously. Is that a lizard, man? I'm not
confident. Put it next to the Space Marine, honestly.
They're about the same thing. One of them just...
Oh, sorry. Because I get your head caved in the
bronze ball. Yeah. One of them screams for the
Emperor, the other yells Bach, but like... It's
been a while since we've translated for the Emperor.
Can we get some Bachs in the chat, please? Guabalin.
A tier. Yeah, they're better than grots. We could
get a shanking in our gut, definitely. It'd be
difficult, but we could take one. Dwarf. I mean,
that's next to the votan, right? No, no, hang
on, hang on, hang on. I can see an argument for
B tier. If it's just one dwarf. They get in tavern
brawls in the Empire all the time. Sometimes
they come away from that lost. I feel like you
could poison a dwarf's drink and he wouldn't
know. Yeah, but we're not poisoning. We're beating
him up. Are we? Yes. I'm not a fireman. Obviously,
if we're taking on a Slayer or an Ironbreaker,
then yeah, we're going to get our ass kicked.
But just like a Warhammer dwarf, we can get one.
The four of us. Get those merchants. S tier?
Really? I can take them. More than a Gretchen?
Not Teclis. I will take Teclis. A high elf is...
High Elves are pretty tough. High Elves with
an Eldar, realistically, right? Honestly, yeah.
Yeah, they move quick. That's the Fortnite. They
move very quickly. One of us had to grab and
just... Colin and Hal both gave me our answer.
This is just chaos and fantasy. Chaos and fantasy.
Like, as a concept? Yeah, I'm going to go for
Wii. Enjoy. A Chaos Warrior, like, bottom is
low at sea, yeah. harder than a space marine
especially because of like you said we're using
within like the realms technology bro i don't
i'm gonna shoot him and he's gonna laugh yeah
thank you for the box and chat by the way chad
thank you for the box i'm telling you prime ankle
biters we one goes for ankles we've got him with
their cursed armor fused with it no i'm not him
no God, we'd have to get an arquebus or something
and just be like, please, please, please, please.
Oh my god. Why did we have a navy ship? We could
take it, bro. Oh my gosh. Oh my god. Is there
anything we think we need to change in the list,
by the way? Well, I mean that we can get away
with changing no, so the tank has to... You know,
the Baneblade has to stay in C tier. Otherwise,
I think it's okay enough. Oh my god. I don't
know. I feel like we... I mean, to be honest,
we wouldn't stand a chance against any of these
things, let's be real. We could take A and S
tier. Come on now. Yeah. Vampires we couldn't
kill. I don't think we could do it. That would
be like a D tier one as well. I will fight Neferata
in your stead. Thank you, Bill. No Bretonnia
as well for Mr. Mike. Bretonnian Peasant is S
tier. Bretonnian Knife is S tier. Were we putting
Chaos? In general? We were going to put it into
near bottom of C somewhere. Probably... Maybe
this is the hardest space for me, to be honest.
Yeah. Okay. Or harder, given the technology.
Yeah. That's the list. We're just not going to
look in your eye, bro. We can take the navigator.
There we have it, guys. I think that was our...
Could we take it to this? Could we take him in
a flight to this? One of our first tier lists
was what animals could we take? Maybe we should
revisit that. Okay, what members of, like, 70s
pop groups could we take? Four versus one, like,
group. Yeah, yeah, we'll be like a pop group
and we'll take one out. I say thank you guys
for listening to the episode, though. Comment
below generally what you think you could take
with, like, a bunch of your mates. That'd be
hilarious. How delusional can you be? What can
you take on? Thank you so much for watching and
listening. I hope you guys enjoyed that episode.
As always, we're on offline. Join our Spotify,
other places. If you want to join the Discord
to watch the unedited live versions where we
have the donation links to the YouTube stuff.
Before we go any further, should we do the last
of the donations? Oh, yes. Because of you. Lord
Primes lives on. Yes, thank you. 12th Legion.
12th Legion Chain Axe number 43. Thank you for
the $2. Nice PFP. Andy has crazy drip indeed.
Andy's always dripped out on stream. It's got
the Corsair. Is that from GD? Yeah, you see this?
Damocles, bro. Wow. We won that, by the way.
No, you didn't. I love the Damocles War. I love
everyone involved saying they won. Which one?
Everyone won the Damocles War. Everyone won.
The Eldar won. Hey, guys, we're whooping you
so bad, we're going to give you a little bit
of a breathal. Come back again. And we won the
second Damocles. The White Scars won? We definitely
won. The Old Trains won. It was a bit more tough.
The Old Trains were freaking marching on Stalingrad.
The White Scars won. We kicked their butt. Poor
Russell. At least Russell has got the drip. Jay
Salas for 2 ,500 CPL. I don't know what that
is. Appreciate it, though. Eli carries his team
with his godlike game. This is true. He is the
backbone of our strategy for a lot of things.
Work with Bo. Thank you for the fibers. The Halo
4 M510 Mammoth. Length, 63 .3 meters, 224 .2
feet. Width, 32 .8 meters, 107 .6 feet. Height,
27 meters, 89 feet. Mass, god damn, that's heavy.
439 .1 metric tons, max speed 76 kilometers an
hour. God damn, that thing is cruising 46 miles
an hour with 20 to 30 guys. But it can't shoot
up. No, but it does have the master chief on
it who can shoot up. Yeah. Oh, and Ogerman2666,
remember, for 20 months, he says he's just had
gallbladder. No work surgery. Good to think.
I hope the recovery is all swift, man. Good.
Best of luck to you, man. I hope we make it a
bit easier. You know, you're laughing at our
terrible Baneblade. Cabana's mighty schlong.
Where are the greater demons? Don't worry about
it. We did not. That would have taken too long.
We didn't put any of Warhammer Chaos Space Marine
or any chaos, really. But don't worry. We had
to our chaos. Also, you can't kill demons. That's
the point. Defeating one. We could 1v4 a pink
horror after enough times. We'd get messed up.
I think maybe we could take a blue horror. Yeah,
we could take a... That's true. We could never
take a demon out. We could possibly get a plague...
Not a plague, but a scrawler. A plague walker.
No. With enough guns, we can shoot any demon.
Yeah. If it's Warhammer Fantasy, it's a bit tougher.
That dog is so damn cute. He's like, please come
to bed, you boys. We want to go to bed. Thank
you guys for listening, for watching. Dog, dog,
dog, dog, dog, dog. Dog, the second dog. Law
crimes. We'll see you guys all on the next episodes
going forward, and we'll catch you guys very
soon. Love you. Bye. Bye, everybody. Bye. Bye,
everyone.