Hello everyone and welcome to another episode
with the Lore Crimes crew. We've got our usables,
we've got our drinks, we've got everything ready
to talk about some good Maelstrom lore, some
new stuff, some cutting edge as of the current
date. I don't know, is the box set and all the
stuff, the models, they've been shipped out I
think now, aren't they? They're hitting the deck.
They're hitting the deck, we have perhaps one
of the oldest characters in Warhammer, like as
in... this guy still gets law somehow and Eldar
get nothing except a little bit uh shout out
to Huron Blackheart today who will be the main
focus you know he'll get some decent love and
as I always we're on uh for law crimes we are
on other things we are on Spotify or on all those
other good platforms you want to check us out
there Of course, do join our Discord where we
have people help us do episodes. We have you
guys answer beautiful questions. We have other
cool parts where we will do miniature of the
week at the end of this episode. But other than
that, really, we could dive straight on into
it, guys, unless anyone wanted to. Anything interesting
happen in previous week for anybody or they want
to dive straight into the lore? No, same way.
Not as anything interesting going on. I will
preempt this. I have got Space Marine 2 multiplayer
footage of me playing as a Red Corsair. It starts
off pretty choppy, but as I kind of kick out
the jams, I get a lot better. And there's one
guy, he's just noob tubing me that I get revenge
on. So I'm just going to put that out there.
I don't suck the whole game. There's a noob tubing
Space Marine 2? Oh, the carbine. It's got a grenade
launcher on the bottom. Getting close. And it
never fails. That looks pretty cool. nice yes
but we are talking about one of the more iconic
warp storms in the setting not quite the eye
of terror not quite the cicatrix maledictum that
has been you know fucking everybody's day out
apparently for the last seven years uh it is
all maelstrom this thing has been around for
a hot minute in warhammer law and eli is going
to take us into more of the revelations of the
more recent law i i remembered something interesting
yes Uh, I, uh, my, my banking app was like, Hey,
you have some recurring charges that you can
get rid of. And I'm like, Oh, maybe I forgot
some subscription to some, you know, fucking
website or whatever. And then I looked at it.
It's like, yeah, your car insurance. I'm like,
I would love to cancel that subscription. I'd
love to save a little bit more, but I kind of
need that one. You know, that was interesting.
And I looked at that and I was like, I'm upset.
I thought I was about to save a hundred bucks
a month. I played Overwatch for the first time
in years. Man, I'm so washed. I'm so washed,
guys. It's too fast for old fellas like us, Hal.
It's not that it's too fast. It's just ultimate
watch. It's ultimate after ultimate. People's
movement. People's movement in game is literally
wriggling around. No one stands or moves in normal
directions. It was a bit like, I forgot we really
did that. Colin quoting the artist formerly known
as McCree there. Classic character. Well, you
know, don't name them after employees and don't
have employees that do terrible things. We won't
have a problem here. Rest in milk. Speaking of
employees who have done terrible things, though.
You're on Blackheart. Here we go. All right.
We got the new book. I guess it's like three
weeks old at this point, but it's new. I spent
$100 to get this stupid little book. Thankfully,
I was actually able to sell the other ones because
I didn't need them. But yeah, we're talking about
the Maelstrom and the Red Corsairs and the places
in the Maelstrom and some of the dudes in the
Red Corsairs. And like five minutes of Eldar
lore that you get at the end. And they clickbaited
the frick out of me. They clickbaited so hard
with the Prince Aerial stuff, but whatever. So
anyways, as we know, the Maelstrom is a relatively
stable warp tear. I guess you could say it's
a warp real space interstice near the galactic
core. It is crazy. There's lots of demon worlds.
There's lots of corruption. Everything's changing
and going all over the place, but compared to
places like the Eye, it is relatively stable
and habitable to live in if you're strong enough.
This, of course, is in the Maelstrom Zone, a
resource -rich area, which the Imperium still
inhabits quite largely, and this place would
have been under full Imperial control. Everything...
would have been pushed back to the Maelstrom.
All the Xenos, all the Chaos guys would have
been wrecked if the Imperium didn't mess it up.
Because the Maelstrom warders back in the day,
the Astral Claws, the Mantis Warriors, the Lamenters,
and the Charnel Guard worked together to secure
the Maelstrom zone and secure all these resources
for the Imperium. They were doing an awesome
job until the High Lords of Terra decided that
they're going to pull out the Charnel Guard.
That screwed the Maelstrom warders entirely,
and this would, of course, lead to the Bad Ab
War, which will be a different episode. And obviously,
in this Bad Ab War, Huron and his buddies lost,
sadly for them. It's a better Horus Heresy, though.
You should check it out. And Huron and his buddies
fled into the Maelstrom. Huron was mortally wounded,
but he would be saved by, what's his name, Geryon,
the Corpse Master. And the Dark Gods, a mysterious
pledge to the Dark Gods. And now he's been carving
his way through the Maelstrom, creating the Red
Corsairs and a new empire and a new home for
all of his buddies. So that's basically the history
of this place. In the Maelstrom are Xenos, cults,
cultists, humans, chaos marines. What are they
called? Stupid dwarves. Is there a Denny's? The
Leagues of Wotan. I can't even remember their
names. Look, I finished recording something.
I had some negative views on them, but Jesus
Christ, it's not that bad. You act like the Wotan
or the second coming of Hitler. The Wotan are
okay. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And then the kin
fucked my wife. It's just personified mid, to
be honest. That's how I feel. You made me read
Hammer of Olympia. I don't want to hear about
mid. Okay, okay, okay. You guys just did a Furious
Abyss episode. You've had plenty of... That's
not mid, that's ass. Yeah. That made everything
else more enjoyable after that. Furious ass abyss.
There you go. I looked up art for it the other
day, actually, because it's in a Nemesis moment,
which I'm reading through for a large cast. And
it has a model, like an old model in Battlefleet
Gothic, but that's unrelated to what we're talking
about. The Red Corsairs are, of course, to my
knowledge, the second largest organized Chaos
Space Marine Force. in the Warhammer setting
behind Abaddon. And Huron has an alliance with
Abaddon, but this doesn't stop him from spying
on him and stuff, of course. But they work together.
Abaddon helped him out in the Cadian Gate, smashing
Cadia with the old Blackstone Fortress and showing
up to help people. I'm pretty sure Huron also
imprisoned Gilman. This has nothing to do with
the Maelstrom, though. This is other... That's
the Terran Crusade. They're on the way to the
Throne World and on the way... Redcore says,
like, hey, Siege, Lord of Change, you want to
capture Primark? He's like, okay. And then, like,
Cypher lets them out. They're like, oh, good
old Cypher. Yeah, really fumbled the bag there,
didn't they? Anyways, there is a, like, a Death
Watch Inquisitorial Fortress in the Maelstrom,
and they have been making attempts to map the
Maelstrom, which is very hard, but they have
some bouts of success. When they do this, it
is said that tarot readers slit their throats
with their own cards, charter scribes dislocate
their jaws by screaming, navigators tear out
their third eye, and others who attempt to rationalize
the region's anomalies suffer fate so bad that
it makes them very hard to dispose of. They make
a big mess. The maelstrom is ever -changing,
and so they constantly have to update the maps.
and go through burn through all these people
and resources to get through it but here's some
notable locations mentioned in our new book i
don't think these were in the lore before to
my knowledge but they are now some of them are
cool some of them are like ascendants but we
have we got the red marches in the northern region
it's a place of extreme corruption that mutates
the physical along with energy and matter and
space itself the we got a picture of this like
i'll put this on put this up so that any of this
makes sense look at this can you see it yeah
we will try and get a representation for the
uh audio listeners but it is a essentially a
massive swirling heated disc of space it is angry
raspberry ripple so here's here's here's the
the rad the red marshes these are the rad marshes
not the rad march is not the red marches i wrote
down fucking radical man shit i'm more in hollow
is that the center of the maelstrom is theorized
to once have been an elder world and there are
waves of soul misery here according to astropaths
the places around here are infested with demonic
parasites uh the veneration caldera is a dozens
light years long chaotic scar contains a large
amount of xenos pirates and it's theorized to
have been made by technological catastrophe the
zealed wire there is a giant fold in real space
that's it the parakire helix is a place of twisted
real space which the red corsairs used to travel
and then the great lesion is a shadow realm that
hides at least one red corsair stronghold and
who knows what else it is full of uh negators
and umbral giants that cast unlight around the
legion sorry the region Then there's two much
larger, more important spaces, the Howling Gyre
and the Tyrant's Crown. So the Howling Gyre first
is home to Galmec, which is a big giant world
eater's demon engine industrial world. Is this
in the lore already or is this new? Do you guys
know? It's this place called Galmec. All right.
Yeah. I mean, we've heard of... demon was before
but isn't most of them are kind of just vague
or in some sense they're just more like it's
like it's a hey this is a thing that's out there
it's pretty wacky like the planet that's a dude
the fat man planet it uh seems to be one of like
the main bases for the world leaders especially
in the maelstrom itself It has miles -wide summoning
circles. There's battle towers to the stratosphere.
There's forge mazes that go down to the bedrock.
There's unimaginably -sized void docks. Grimoires
are written. Talismans and weapons are imbued
by the millions. Thousands of ships constantly
come in and out. The Dark Mechanicum, the Iron
Warriors, and the Wardbears all work together
here to create demon engines. The Templars of
Lurgar are some knights of House Sherid. I'm
not sure how to say it. Probably should read.
And they're trained and raised up in the depths
of Galmec. Galmec orbits a cursed star which
waxes and wanes between shining bright and going
dark. The system is covered by hundreds of moons
that have been seared with burning runes the
size of cities. Demons are attracted to these
and they burrow into the rocks and they always
watch for intruders and give information to the
sorcerers in Galmec's sacred towers. The planet
is also shielded by a nebula. by a nebula of
glittering crystals shards and these shield it
from outside view and only part for those welcome
so it's basically impossible to get there if
you're not supposed to get there and most people
can't even see it that's that's kind of cool
i guess that's they really threw every ingredient
into this like like can you guys think of any
possible planet like construction and we'll throw
it in is there a dodecahedron planet you enjoying
your space uh your warhammer gumbo there's like
yeah put more in stick it in it's pretty much
i appreciate a nice gumbo that's fine don't worry
about it i would say it's a big world uh sorry
i hope i didn't say world leaders this big word
bearers planet that is very important uh then
there's autoless or cockless It's the last remaining
tomb world. Necron lore, Necron lore. The last
remaining tomb world in the... Get this out of
here. My space marine lore? You got a book, Eli,
this year. Calm down. You had a book. You got
a book. Bruh. You got your one book. Be happy.
I hope Jagged Eye shows up exploded. Like a fucking
lethal company death. It's a tomb world in the
Vorskek dynasty. It's the last one, I guess.
It's heavily infested by demons. And there are
some portions that are awake and these wage war
against the demons. And others are still protected
by noctilithic barriers. Because remember, Necrons
can just turn off chaos when they feel like it
because they're the best faction. And there's
some mysterious great treasure in the depths
of this tomb world that aliens and Xenos, aliens
and pirates and everybody would like to get.
Then we have the Fargos Hex. It was once a world
in the Pale Stars, but randomly vanished prior
to the opening of the Great Rift, and now is
spotted every once in a while in various locations
in the Maelstrom. When it shows up, it brings
with it gravidic and empiric catastrophes. There's
disturbing pleas for aid coming from this planet,
but a lot of people believe these to be nothing
but demons. We have the Gnall Bastion, which
is where the Death Watch... the Imperium, the
Inquisitors, etc. are. It rises from the sands
of a planet resembling a charred eyeball, and
there's an obscuring veil which shrouds the planet
from augers and holds back the Maelstrom's corruption.
Many throughout the ages have occupied the place,
but it's currently the stronghold of the Imperium,
held by the Inquisition, someone of the Ordo
Astartes. And then there's Bathamore. It's a
demon world of rivers of fire, kaleidoscopic
crystal jungles, floating peaks and bubbling
pits of iridescent slurry. Many Chaos Marines
reside here, and the corruption seeps outwards,
touching asteroids and planets, which brings
them somehow wacky resources, which Xenos often
attempt to take. All right, then there's the
Tyrant's Crown, another large area of the Maelstrom.
This is where the Red Corsairs mostly boole and
are being chillin'. It's the major seat of power
for Huron himself. He has basically complete
control over this area. There's Nubadab, the
new city that is Nubadab. It's risen and is perhaps
the greatest planetary base within the Maelstrom.
It is home to hundreds of thousands of warriors
and space marines, all kinds and billions of
slaves. In the south is the Palace of Thorns,
which Huron had originally fled from, I guess.
And it's Huron's largest bastion. There's a statue
of him in the picture. He had it remade, didn't
he? He basically made a second one because he
was like, you know what? If it ain't broke, remake
the torture palace. Yeah, Huron's a cool guy.
You gotta have fun every now and again. Even
chaos -based marines need downtime. That is such
a wet wipe of a justification. Yeah, he may have
run over people whilst he was drinking, but you
know what? At least he was outside getting some
fresh air. At least he was having fun. 75 % of
accidents are caused by sober drivers, so I'm
just saying. Man, get him on Fox News. No, I'm
joking. Drunk driving the ship in the Maelstrom.
We got the broken narrows. You're telling me
you wouldn't drunk drive an Emperor -class battleship?
I would absolutely be boost cruising that thing
into an Eldarcraft world. That thing doesn't
get driven. It drives you. Alright. The Broken
Narrows is the only major route to the Tyrant's
Crown. It's riddled with rogue planets that just
float around. They have no suns. They contain
sorceries and orbital batteries, which makes
the route very hard to get through. Hell's Iris
is a planetary system. It was formerly an imperial
starfort. It is second only to Nubadab and serves
as a nice way station in the Maelstrom, a place
to go chill for a little bit. It's the in -between
for warp routes, possesses a black market, a
fueling terminal, naval repair facility, mercenary
hub, etc. Party City. Corsair's keep is the Blackstone
Fortress, which was given to Huron by Mr. Abaddon
himself. It's currently dormant, but Huron's
guys are constantly trying to wake it up and
figure it out. And they're always adding more
guns to it, more defense batteries. And people
have to fight off Xenos within, because I guess
that's a thing. Back in the day when you played
the little Blackstone Fortress board game. Ripped
those guys. Then Carfist Anchorage. It's a deep,
void, gravitic anomaly that is unnaturally stable.
So it's a normal place -ish. It serves as a damaged
ship storage because the ships just float there
in the Gravitic Anomaly. This gives Huron's engineers
a steady flow of materials. Dead ships often
will drift here and get stuck in this little
well, gravity well. So it's not so bad. Those
are the main places in the Maelstrom. Can we
do donos before the next section? say that last
one just look it sounds like a space hulk generator
like just everything every like century a new
space hulk just pops out of that place yeah the
picture is just like a bunch of floating ships
i think it's kind of cool just keep pushing i
can see its head no we don't need any more To
start us off then, the first donation from Don
Balfazar for five. It's 4 a .m. here, so I doubt
I would make the stream. Just wanted to praise
Boingob. We'll praise Boingob in terms of the
donation. DonkeyManUSA, two bucks. Stream late
due to how good the taxes are. I just did my
taxes. Thanks, brother. And it was an inside
job. Thank you for $5. Sick aff, so I could catch
the stream while painting my lather and seaguard.
Nice. Sorry that you're sick, though. Played
my first game of Old World last weekend and am
now Ulpuan's top guy. Nice. Hell yeah. The hatred
against elves fades away the moment you play
a single game as elves. Well, that's the resident
Gotik and Felix expert. Sweden. Good evening,
boys. Good evening. Thank you for, as always,
well, you know, not right now, but saving me.
when I flub Godric and Felix lore because it
all just is a homogenized blob in my head. Eli,
what bicky was that? Lotus. What was that? Dog
tweet or a little bicky? It's a Biscoff cookie.
I thought it was Biscoff. All will wear a green
hat in ten weeks. Your fate is sealed. Thank
you. Why are you going to say it like that? It's
honoring our PFP. There we go. Amazing. Angry
homunculus. Oh, sorry. Tell us this one. Angry
homunculus for five pounds. With my purchase
of the Corsair box, I've come to the realization
I got a lot of Eldari for someone who claims
to collect Space Marines and Stormcast. Have
us to the best of us, you know. That's cool stuff.
Joe Pivot, thanks, man. Five bucks. Hi, guys.
And Hal. It's good to see you. You look like
a human scaven, Lord Mr. Ratburn. Thank you,
brother. Thank you, Joe, for that kind message.
Thank you. Donkey Man, you was eight. Then you
were five dollars. Once Mike and I complete part
two of the Hal Supercut, available to members
in the members chat. Part two? Yeah, it's like
three hours, by the way. Part one will be made
available for all members of the Lore Crimes
Discord. Should I be offended or proud that I
don't have a supercut? Maybe a second one. I
feel like people have said much more interesting
things than me, to be honest. It's a hell of
a personality. Hell's got some bangers. You've
got some bangers every now and again. It's an
early poop knife lore. Yeah. Thank you for the
two. Look, you're speaking my language. Beer
is a drink best served car. Yeah, brother. Yeah,
brother. Oh, man. So thank you to Harborwave1034
for becoming a member. Thank you very much. Message
me in the Discord to be in the members -only
Discord chat. Don't come in your safe again,
T -Bone. He's driving in my car right after a
beer, in quotes. Yeah, buddy. Yeah, buddy. Oh,
man. We've started something here. A beer, please.
The last one for now. Thank you for the $10.
Thank you very much. It's been a minute since
I caught you goons live. Shout out to my boy
Goldjaw for being based as hell. I doubled my
cancer, gave it to the next guy, so I'm better
now. Eli, I need your coaching soon. God bless
you. I'm glad you're better. I'm hoping that
your better part is the honest part of that sentence.
Yeah, I'm hoping it is. uh that's incredible
for our boy dragon yeah he had his operation
so well hell yeah man glad to hear you're doing
good makes me very happy hope we uh hope we uh
have entertained you and kept you you're saying
man thank you indeed uh okay i will indeed be
happy to provide some coaching to get jacked
and swole the discord message me whoever wants
that forces of the maelstrom here we go here
we go things all the Gribblies, as Andy would
probably call them. Gribbly! That are in the
maelstrom. There's a lot of minor factions and
just people bullying. And then obviously there's
mainly the regular series. There's a lot of minors
in the maelstrom. Okay, we gotta get off this.
Do not pass go, go directly to hell. There are
some trends you don't need to associate with
the game. The island would be in the Maelstrom,
there would certainly be an island in the Maelstrom,
I can tell you that. Jeffrey the Blackheart,
yeah. Okay, so some people holding power and
operating the Maelstrom are generally just amongst
the chaos. Space Marines, Black Legion are in
here. Some independent warlords on errands for
Abaddon and some are here to spy on Huron. Some
even operate on their own little war bands and
carve out their own little empires. Brawl brands
of thousands and sorcerers seek to use the Maelstrom
to fuel their psychic ability. The Death Guard
perform infectious rites and warlords of all
sorts lead armies of heretics. Even war herds
of beastmen, beastmen mentioned, reside. in the
maelstrom the emperor's children the emperor's
children do their regular stuff in here as well
of uh speaking of minors i guess you know what
the emperor's children do that they mostly are
here for i pull back they're mostly here to torment
uh civilians and bull uh but there's some i just
thought this guy's name was cool so i i put it
in lord uh velentor's polytrophic prison has
set up their base to raid Imperial worlds near
the Maelstrom. Chaos Knights operate here throughout
the Maelstrom. Some work with worlds like Galmec.
Others become Pirate Lords and icons of the Dark
Gods, gaining their own armies and cultists,
which made me want to buy a Chaos Knight and
have my own little army around him. That would
be cool. The Knight Lords are here being absolute
freaking chuds. They hate Huron, and so they
perform guerrilla operations against him just
to mess with him. and other than that they're
here to terrorize civilians and skin people alive
just for fun classic classic high quality night
lords lore right there as usual he did when he
met some of the uh in the nightlords trilogy
when he met some of them he said uh he he would
have liked to have gone to nostrama because he
thinks they have a funny sense of humor people
so that's a uh that's a take he has But yeah,
the Night Lords are here pretty much solely just
to, like, be scary. I don't know. You make it
make sense. Whatever. It doesn't matter. The
Orcs. There's also Orcs in the Maelstrom. There's
some funny ones. But most of them are just nomadic
guys looking around to fight. They roam around
the Maelstrom. Some, such as the Death Skulls,
under Warlord Snick Mech, have set up shop. He
resides on a planet. which has an anomaly by
that sees damaged ships passing constantly which
allows him to take all their materials and create
giant forts on this planet fortifying it very
well and consistently building bigger and bigger
fleets replacing lost ships other orcs inhabit
the more stable areas in the maelstrom but most
are wandering pirates raiding free buddhas etc
uh their constant annoyance to huron He's promised
great rewards to any Reeve captains who could
bring him the heads of these pirates. The most
famous free Buddha is Admiral Sun Smasher, who
allegedly destroyed an entire star with a right
hook from his power claw. I guess he's the goat.
This post has been fact -checked by Bravo Orky
Gits. That's right. That's true. He was juicing
his fun. He's taken on the personal task of trolling
Huron as much as possible and hopes to fell the
warlord and become the biggest boss in the entire
Maelstrom. Then here's your two minutes of Eldar
lore. You have Eldar Corsairs. I don't know,
Colin, do you have anything cool to say about
Eldar Corsairs other than that they're Eldar
pirates? I mean, that's kind of it. Like, you
know, as a whole thing, like, I like them. They're
probably the closest to pre -fall Eldar overall.
Maybe not in the specifics of how awful they
are. You make Slaanesh, you're probably not a
good person. They're unbound by craft worlds,
but they're not the dark Eldar where being awful
is essentially a law. They just kind of do whatever
they want. They like going out and adventuring.
They're not all pirates, but... Piracy is quite
fun, apparently, so they tend to be pirates.
And Uriel's the reason. Are we doing that now,
or should I hold off on Uriel for a bit? You
can talk about him now if you want, because the
next thing is the Eldritch Raiders, which is
Uriel's own little fleet. So, I mean, yeah, you
can certainly mention that. I'll give it a sec,
but I guess a little overview. He was from Craftled.
I ended before he... Might have let a cyclonic
torpedo hit the craft world, which killed a good
chunk of them. He was told as politely as possible
to get the hell off of this craft world, you
asshole. Andy's third partying in the video right
now, by the way. Hey, sometimes you just gotta
do what you gotta do. It's true. He ended up
turning into the most successful Eldar Corsair
ever with like tens of thousands of ships under
his command and just screw it with the Imperium
and really anyone else that happens to be within
arm's reach at a moment's notice. He also has
a crone sword. Well, one of the crone swords.
It's a spear, but it's... Twilight Spear. Spear
of Twilight, isn't it? Spear of Twilight, yeah.
It stabbed the Tyranids so hard the Hivemind
felt it. Does it still kill him on the tabletop?
I don't know what his rules are like now. I haven't
seen his latest rules. I would have to double
check. I don't think it did as of, like, the
last, like, prior even to this. I don't think,
like, 10th it did anything like that to him.
I think back in the day, you had to take, like,
a leadership test or something every time he
fought, and if he failed, it did a wound to him,
something like that. I think until, and I'll
have to check, like, his latest rules update,
but I think until now, assuming there has been
a significant change, he was just a worse Autark.
Yeah, that sounds like most of the characters.
Yeah, all right. So Uriel leads the Eldritch
Raiders, which, as Colin said, are the most successful
Corsair fleets in the Deep Void. They were recently
approached by a Harlequin troop, which set them
on the path into the Maelstrom. According to
the Harlequins, within the Infernal Gyre were
artifacts that could change the fate of the entire
Eldar species. So Uriel agreed to aid the troop
in recovering these treasures and headed into
the webway. At Uriel's side is Karseth, the greatest
of his Void Dreamers, which are basically Eldar
Navigators, but better, because Eldar are better
than you at psychic stuff. Most Void Dreamers
can't exist on the battlefield, but Karseth is
able to do so and withstand the mental trauma
that they deal with, because I guess... I don't
know, they're very sensitive to... I imagine
with how the Eldar do things, and combined with
their emotions being heightened, a battlefield,
you know, heightened emotions are going to be
running rampant when thousands of people are
dying. It's probably a very stressful thing.
At least that's how I, like, assume it works.
Yeah, I think there are generally just, like,
really sensitive beings that can sense, I don't
know, all these movements and stuff, and so the
craziness of the war is too much for them. Is
this why they always, whenever you read Eldar
books, they're weirdly not that mature? I feel
like when I read them, do you know what I mean?
They're quite... Might have more to do with the
author, to be honest. Some of it is, like, it's
very hard to write an arrogant character, not
just feel like a child. And, you know, the Eldar
are space elves, so arrogance is part and parcel
of that. Yeah. I imagine in this case, too, it's
like, imagine if you... Oh, nice kill, Andy.
That was pretty nice. Imagine if you felt the
dying screams of everyone on the battlefield
in your soul. No, you're not going to be having
a good time. I think I feel correct in saying
that that would take most people out of the fight
if everyone's dying screams was echoing in your
soul. Just a casual mentee bee. Mental breakdown.
Okay. Wow. I thought I was old. I've never heard
that even in my life, bro. Yeah, you are old,
Unc. What the fuck are you on about? Someone's
been on Facebook. Oh, I found a meme once. Look
at my grandkids, guys. Okay, so anyways, Karsef
is able to fight. and can, like, track enemy
movements really well, just, like, predicting
the space stuff. Yeah, this allows Uriel's army
to be ready and planned for attacks whenever
needed. But it is very hard to be on the battlefield,
even for Karseth, and it's still traumatic, I
guess. And then, finally, the main head guys,
the Red Corsairs. Do either of you Space Marine
people want to talk about Huron? The Red Corsairs
at all. You can have some time in this episode.
Do you want to give it a bash, Hal? I may not
be as ingratiated with Huron himself. Would this
be for... It doesn't have to be the entire rundown.
I can give a one -sentence summary. Start with
that. Imagine... The kind of person who would
be angry when his request to invade Hell is met
with a no. Like, no, you're not allowed to do
that, you goddamn clown. From what I know, such
a member of Huron, he became Chapter Master quite
young. Youngest in the Chapter history, I think.
Yeah, so he, in the Astral Claws, which... were
already a chapter of Renown. They had a successor
chapter, didn't they, which was the Tiger Claws,
wasn't it? Yeah. And so, you know, to be a secondary
founding of Ultramarines, to then have their
own other chapter, they obviously had some esteem.
There was some probably even greater arrogance,
being that they are descended from, apparently,
GW's favourite chapter, Ultramarines. Ultramarines!
Yes, so... Huron goes on basically the dark Gilliman
timeline in the sense of, you know, I would say.
And throughout his, I guess, rule as chapter
master, it's the thing with his frustration grew
because, you know, even though they are space
Marines, they are, you know, no, no fear and,
you know, the greatest things ever apparently.
And they definitely will not get stomped by any
Necron squad immediately. They have limitations.
by their numbers they are only a thousand as
per the codex astartes uh oh particularly at
this time so therefore this frustration grew
into the fact that huron was not able to essentially
you know i mean like he's like we have them on
the run but you know the enemies the maelstrom
could be conquered it could be pacified if they
just had a bit more resources they just had a
bit more time a bit more funds and men i don't
think it's necessary i don't i wouldn't say it's
bad writing i thought what i the way i view it
at least is like he is so like he thinks his
don't stink so much he's like no i'm the guy
who can take down you know this warp storm only
second to the eye of terror this rift in real
space like no i'm that guy i can handle this
To be fair, he also was diverting resources.
He was supposed to be tithing to the Imperium
in order to do it. Not as much as he would eventually
do, but enough to be like, someone else might
have needed that, bro. We will have an episode
on the Battle of War probably like next month,
where I will glaze Euron and save him from this.
He is, I think, the most overhyped Chaos Space
Marine. I ain't gonna lie to you. Surmising his
lore, quite. a lot. He essentially, like Andy
was saying, he stopped sending the TIE. He then
goes beyond the bounds of the Codex Astartes
and starts to increase his chapter's numbers
beyond 1 ,000. I think he subsumes the TIGER
clause basically into the actual clause. He also
creates the Tyrant's Legion, which is like, I
think, 100 ,000 mortal auxilia that he just goes,
right, we're just going to make a mortal army
as well to supplement our space marines. I think
it's... i i might be wrong but it's a lot it's
a lot more than a space marine chapter so he
uses like a lot and it might it might have started
and then it grew and grew and grew but like he
was like i'm i'm like a conqueror me i'm gonna
be like a proper legion of old kind of we're
gonna build up to a hundred thousand space marines
slowly and then as soon as he starts getting
to like seven thousand everyone's like hey you're
on No? Bad. You build a little legion over there,
sir. Why not legion, but legion -shaped? But
he would... Yo, we out of legion. Huron with
a legion -shaped stomach. He would go on to increase
his chapter, in quotations, size. Huron's girth
would increase. That is not how he said it, but
it is how we view it. Official law crime statement.
He would call in allies, call in favors, chapters
that owed allegiance to, not time to go to everyone,
but, you know, as Eli was saying earlier, we
had like Lamenters, Executioners, Mantis Warriors,
other ones start joining up to Huron's cause.
And eventually when the Lords of, good old Lords
of Terror, you know, they had kind of the opposite,
which is they had no taxation and no representation
in their own fief. they said where yeah so this
time to bring him into heel and to i think if
i remember correctly as well the they were fast
pacing uh aspirants through the process of becoming
space marines so they're kind of a bit of like
almost monstrosities in some sense and eventually
the imperium would turn into what would be the
bad war the civil war that would eventually you
know lots of different acts in it many acts of
betrayal subterfuge and you know kind of piss
poor behavior on both sides essentially but mostly
huron's arrogance would lead to his fall he would
get injured and he would retreat the rest the
last of the astral claws and he would obviously
supposedly make this pact with chaos and he turns
himself he's like basically you know if i can't
build an empire for the imperium i'm gonna build
it for me and maybe chaos will help me so he
would go on to found himself as well The Imperium
doesn't know he survived the Badab War, but then
there's this figure that emerges from the ashes
with a funny little warp creature who gives him
access to weird strength and power. He has, instead
of, I think he had dual lightning claws in some
of the artworks he previously depicted in as
an astral claw. I think he has a lightning claw
and a gatling bolt thingy. An assault cannon.
Now it's a... It's hard to go wrong with having
the gun of an A -10 Warthog as your primary weapon.
I can't hate that. He's also a big boy. As a
Space Marine, he's always been pretty chunky.
As much as he's probably some corrupt politician,
he's a big chunk boy. More manlit oppression.
The main Space Marines never get to be manlets.
He's got quite the brawler. When you grow two
feet as part of the procedure, yeah, you're not
going to find any short space marines. Just go
to the Alpha Legion now. They killed Alparius
because he was too short. They couldn't have
that. Damn, no short kings in my life. I'm the
only short space marine. Killing myself. Most
of that post was someone saying men under 5 '4
should end it all. It's like, wow. Surmising
with Huron's law, he would be saved through some
spicy surgery, some spicy cybernetics, and probably
made a bit of chaos juice, who knows. And he
would become the black heart to represent, you
know, the outside. So the inside has become the
outside, and it reflects the heart within. He
becomes this tyrant slash leader who would go
on to form the Red Corsairs, and they form this,
I guess, Again, they're almost like a Legion
-sized strength from this moment on, because
they don't care where your origin Legion is from.
They, at many times, just attack other Space
Marine, like Loyalist chapters for their gene
seed. Some Space Wolf elements have joined them,
notably. And eventually, it's kind of a swelling
ground for miscreants, the lost and the damned,
across the Maelstrom forces and area. and this
is where we kind of find ourselves event obviously
he kind of allies with uh abaddon but he we essentially
find huron in charge of this massive raider corsair
empire with the strength of that is larger than
what he ever possessed when he was loyalist to
the imperium yeah And I'm going to have that
and this and that and this said here on. I'm
pretty good at taking stuff. Personality wise,
he was a ambitious, cunning individual who buried
deep within a placid and politicians like face.
It was buried deep within a hatred and a need
for control. So he is very much a asshole, as
people would say. What did Paulson say? You get
the fuck back to writing that four -hour mage
episode. You get back in the dungeon. You crawl
away. We appreciate you. In recent years, Huron's
main things have been messing up the Hollow Worlds,
which is a novel I read. literally 10 years ago,
so I can't really remember how much it is, but
I'm going to reread it. It's on my bookshelf
up there. He also soloed the White Scars on Chagoras
pretty easily. No, he didn't! He didn't win!
He lost. He got pushed away. He came back and
then he won. You will see him in the Night...
I've said a bit earlier about it. You see him
in the Night Lords trilogy books. So he does
meet some iconic characters throughout the setting,
and he's... He's quite hilariously, as much as
other people like Abdon and other ones have egos,
he doesn't mind if you insult him to his face
because he just finds it funny. Oh, well, there
is that exchange when Honsu tries to get an armada
with the Skull Harvest, which is like a tournament
he throws every few years to be like, hey, are
you a promising new warband leader? Come to my
place and see if you can kill everyone else that
wants all my ships and I'll give you them for
free. And he's like, he steps up to Honsu and
Honsu's like looking up to him and he makes like
a snide comment because he's an iron warrior
and that's their thing. I've seen their subreddit.
And so Huon just kind of like gets like a finger
of his, he's kind of like stabbed him through
the gut and he's like, you're going to talk shit.
And he's like, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm
so sorry. yep yep you do not mess with huron
because he's also like ballooned in size compared
to like that whole if you stay in like a chaos
hub you're gonna get like juiced up and so like
even in that uh story it talks about how hanzo's
like i'm not a small guy that guy's huge he's
like he's he's strangely quiet very imposing
very intimidating and he's got the ships to prove
how how big his schlong is shall we say Oh no.
We do meet him in the Night Lords trilogy and
he is charismatic and charming. And there's a
funny insight that is shown in that novel, which
is the Night Lords in that book were legionaries,
not chapters, not anything. They fought on like
the Crusades and the Siege of Terror. And they
almost like when the Red Corsairs fight, you
can, they can see this, like they have terrible
equipment, the Night Lords. But the skill difference
is quite a chasm between what is a legionary
and a Red Corsair. But the Red Corsairs have
quite good gear. And in that novel, you do see
them attack the Marines' errand. I think their
fortress monastery. And they take their gene
seed vaults while the entire chapter is basically
away on campaign. Because, again, it's all about
pillaging. And Ciaran does get betrayed by the
Night Lords. But he's like, I expected that to
happen. They steal one of his ships and he swears
he will kill. because he's like i'm going to
take every one of you i think in another story
he has that one where uh he has a fun punishment
for people he doesn't like which is he places
them into a life support system behind his throne
where you have feeding tube down your neck and
you cannot move you cannot see you cannot hear
and you will not if you're a space marine you
will not die you will die of old age Which is
unknown. Him and Abaddon really just be competing
how much of a messed up thing can we put in our
ship. But it's like Abaddon did that thing with
Epimetheus where he's just like, I'm going to
cut out your eyes and sew your lips together
and sew a blank to your back even though you're
a psyker. And he was like, I can do something
like that. Into an egg. In that story, you actually
see the perspective of the marine he does it
to and that person uh that marine face like i'll
you'll never get out of there so he has that
particular he knows there are other beings i
think near him so that is a punishment he reserves
for those who he particularly despises which
is basically denying someone death and any sensation
which is a doozy that's a bad way to go because
it's no death at all yeah uh what else oh he
also he also participated in the uh Volcadia
debacle, as I said before. He drove the boat.
He drove the boat. The locals have a Blackstone
Fortress, don't they? They're also present during
Pandarax, briefly, because they help Abaddon
assault the planet. Do we have any more donors
to get to? Yeah, we can go through for all these
new and old side characters. So to start us off,
who would like to start us off with Beastman
from Sweden? Colin, I think this is your man,
though. He's a man from Sweden with a 50 SEK.
Thank you. Your Honor, my client pleads, oopsie
-daisy, how could he have known about that missile?
Lawyer of Prince Uriel. Yeah, you know, basically
Uriel's defense in that moment, but like, come
on. Your Honor, did you actually see the missile
yourself with your own eyes? Or did you just
feel it when it rocked the crap out of you? Guilty
say what? Kenneth was an inside job. Thank you
for the $5. My name is kind of a meme, but when
are y 'all going to have an episode on Gaunt's
Ghosts and the 15th, 10th, 1st? At least for
me, I need to read those books. Here's the trouble.
The reason I haven't done a video on Gaunt's
Ghosts or Gaunt is because he has 18 books. That's
a lot of books. That's a lot of books, man. i
will eventually i will eventually i'm also behind
on it i know it's good but it's also i'm i'm
daunted by the scale of that for me but still
for me they're like moderate priority they're
not they're not at the end of the list at the
end of the list is it will perpetually remain
the horus heresy which is only ever read when
at this rate whenever hal asked me to read one
yeah Even then it was a novella, not even a full
novel. Amber of Olympia? It's not a full novel.
I got the audiobook of it, so I don't have a
frame of mind. It's half the size of a novel
now. I know you like Iron Warriors. I actually
do like the Iron Warriors. I hate their dad.
It's the poster child book of hatred for him.
He's a prick. Yeah. The Whiskey Goblin. Kevin
Langstrom versus Huron Blackheart. I don't know
who that is. He's a Battletech character. He
pilots a Ghost mech. Look. Oh, yeah. What if
Cthulhu was a mech? Look. He's in a mech. Huron
isn't. I feel like... You can just step on here
on him. Marauder's a heavy mech, too. That's
like 80 tons of mech stepping on him. I don't
know. I was reading some of the Imperial Knight
stuff, and in one of the books, a dark apostle
just kind of jumps at one with his Crozius and
smacks it in the knee and shatters it. You're
like, oh, dear. That's a real Davey versus Goliath
moment right there. I don't know, man. This mech
has teeth. Nom, nom, nom. I love reading the
last word. Boy, this is already... No, no, someone
else can have this one. Yeah, no thanks. Alright,
saturnine782 for da 50. Da 50? The baby said?
Let's go. Nowadays, you've got to add Warhammer
when you mention Big E. Lest you want Normie
to thank you for mentioning Epstein. I don't
think I've ever heard anyone refer to him as
Big E. I'm not going to lie to you. I know Dripsine,
but I don't know Big E. Big E. Why don't you
mention him at the dinner table? Kenneth was
an inside job again. Thank you very much. Probably
your donations, maybe $2. Nice Gatorade hat,
Andy. Andy is giving... Oh my gosh. I'm not going
to lie. Do you have a truck, Andy? For the audio
listeners, he just completely disappeared. I'm
not going to lie. It took me like 10 minutes
to realize that wasn't Gatorade. All right, look
here, you little shits. I wore this specifically
because it was a Red Scores, Red Corsairs episode
and they did my boys dirty. So I had to represent.
Everyone's done the white scars dirty. Well,
mostly just authors. The five authors, the one
author, you know, I was about to defend them
a bit. Now you're not getting it. Okay, I'll
do it anyway. They're great in Apocalypse and
they're not even the main characters. Wizardy
Goblin, another $1 .99. Thank you. Manlit Space
Marines equals Leagues of Wotan. Pretty much.
They've got big swords and kind of bolters and
Volkite -style weapons. No one else here understands
the true secret of, I don't need the Leagues
of Wotan to be good. Deep Rock Galactic is good,
therefore the Leagues of Wotan are good. i still
can't get over the wasted opportunity that that
army is that like it you know i mean like it's
just so i don't know i never met anybody in real
life who actually plays them ever and i play
one i've met arthur bones The one dude. With
the tattoo and everything. Just one guy. So do
you watch a movie and if everything isn't explained
in 10 minutes and fully fleshed out, you just
quit? You're just like, no, it's a bad movie?
No, I just... It's like watching, let's just
say, Star Wars. And then someone goes, you know
what? I absolutely love. Phantom Menace Naboo
Palace Guard. See, you know damn well there's
a 10 -page Star Wars wiki article on that guy.
Let's hang on now. Here's the problem. I wouldn't
have a problem if... I can't even remember his
name. Tanaka. Yeah, Tanaka. I don't have a problem
with Tanaka had a book or a film in that case.
But the problem with Votan is their premier guy.
Is it Ulrich? No. What's the destined? He doesn't
have a book. He's just got a mini. And it's like
a cool mini. But I don't know who this guy is.
And now we've got two editions. Like, he's a
guy in charge. Like, is there any new law on
him? No. That's a black library problem, which
they have many problems lately. Hey, look. Look
at the old world right over there. You get one
book. Fuck you. The scouring. Eat shit. Here's
Istvan. Guys, guys, look. Istvan 5 is back. You
can come. Zadu Layak from the Wordbearers is
getting a new book, and he's been dead for over
a year because he died in the Siege of Terror.
And he's getting a book. Eidlon's got a book.
We're not going to get one for Buddy Egnison?
from the Votan because he's like the guy who's
like, oh, I survived the Tyranids. That'd be
a fun book. Last man standing fighting the Tyranids.
Hear me out. Before we derail too far from the
actual main subject of the video. The Men of
Iron slash like supercomputers angle is possibly
interesting. I love the book Neuromancer. There's
cool things with AI like content. It's very relevant.
You could do something there. Nah, let's just
do dwarves, bro. You know what I mean? Get off
your horse. Let's do Scandinavian dwarves. I
always love when this comes up because me and
Hal have the same opinion but in the opposite
direction where he wants less dwarf and I want
more dwarf and we're both unhappy with what we
have. Because if someone went, you know what
we need also in Warhammer 40k? Make the Eldar
less sci -fi. Make them more like wood elves.
And I'd be like, listen, maybe. Well, that was
a rough patch. Exodites is a cool concept of
a thing. I understand that. But like, it didn't
need dwarves in any sense. No one went, it needed
dwarves. I just can't. Yeah, but they already
existed. Poor, pissed versions of dwarves. There
have been people for 30 years asking for the
squats to come back. They exist. I'm sorry. Yeah,
but all five of them are going to die soon. I'm
sure because they're ancient. They're ancient.
I don't think anybody else, if anyone else, if
you ask every Warhammer fan who may see when,
would you rather have something like more...
updated tower models, more Necron, more Eldar
updates. Would you like Dark Mechanicum? Would
you like any one of those things more than the
squads? Everyone would say yes. I think you're
underestimating the amount of squad fans. Oh
man, I do love the Naboo guy. No one loves the
Naboo. No one loves Phantom Menace. People love
the last 10 minutes of Phantom Menace. Yeah,
it's very true. It's hard to rewatch it because
it ruined my nostalgia. These men from Sweden,
thank you for the 20 sec. We do not claim the
league. I vote Han Andy. He's speaking for the
dwarves, I presume. He's speaking for Sweden
and Scandinavia. Where were we at, Maelstrom?
Focusing back to the actual pool, I want to see
more slurs about dwarves. Okay. We got all the
new guys in the Red Corsairs and the not -so
-new guys. And then you get two minutes of the
Eldar and Red Corsairs interacting, despite them
being the cover box art and pictures of them
fighting throughout the whole book. Oh, whatever.
Okay. New Red Corsairs characters. We have Lord
Drac Tarzar, the Iron Reeve. Jarazod? Yeah, he's
a traitorous officer. He was a traitorous officer
of the Iron Hands. who was censured for allowing
too many horrific deaths amongst the allied soldiery.
He's John Ironhand, and he was sentenced to a
century of penance in the Death Watch. He decided
that the Ironhands have fallen and billions must
die, so he abandoned the Imperium, and he found
a force that respected strength, the Red Corsairs.
He killed the serfs on the transport ship that
was bringing him to the Death Watch, and he carved
his own path towards Huron. He despises mortal
humanity because they're so weak, and he is growing
in power, seizing many resources and ships, but
most of his mortal slaves don't survive very
long, so his armies are actually small. Because
they usually die, because he doesn't treat them
very well. Wow, that's a slight on the Iron Hands
fans. Like, can we have that for David Geimer
book? No, here's a small guy in the maelstrom.
And he's a jerk. I mean, is anyone mistreating
common people really that much of a character?
It's like, this person breathes. He's also an
iron hand, so therefore they are four assholes.
He's very, very iron hand. They didn't try overly
hard. But he thinks he's the goat and that Huron's
time is up and that he is the natural predecessor
to rule all of the Red Corsairs. Yes. The Crimson
Choir, who is the Geist of the Red Marshes, is
a dark apostle who preaches the words of butchery.
given to him by the dark gods he's a very useful
fellow in swaying traitors to huron's cause despite
huron not enjoying the worship of the dark gods
he doesn't like chaos very much he leads the
warband the thirsting sons and they're experts
at hunting patrols of other astartes and uh they
control a huge stockpile of gene seed which they
have taken from these astartes patrols obviously
all different kinds of chapters of gene seeds
he has cryo vaults that are that hold such priceless
treasures that they're hidden even from Huron,
and the Crimson Choir provides a steady but conserved
flow to the tyrant. No one knows his true identity,
but supposedly he told Huron that he was of the
blood of Sanguinius, but he's changed a lot over
the centuries, his mannerisms, his looks, so
a lot of people think that it's actually a demon,
a bunch of demons possessing a host, and that's
what the Crimson Choir is. then you have the
bale master beerless uh creole the enslaver of
the ark he's a grand river and expert of in ship
the ship boarding combat he's a captor of one
of the dread arcs of omen and he now commands
the ship renamed under ma and from here he conducts
sporting actions to capture any ships he can
get within reach of so he's quite a big fleet
he was once a mantis warrior and he actually
fought in the bad war He'll never forget the
wrongs that the Imperium committed to him, so
he keeps his bionic eye that doesn't work very
well and was hastily installed in the evacuation
from Badab. Then there's General Henrik Falkreiber,
an Imperial Guard guy. He was a former Spire
Marshal of Styx. He's a brutal strategist, and
he was once an officer of a guard. He spends
lives as currency, and he shows no mercy to the
enemy or his own soldiers, but he has created
a cult of personality. The people quite like
him. They adorn wolf stuff to their armaments
all the time. He was once an ambitious man of
the Imperium, but when he was moved to anti -pirate
duties around Styx, he became bitter. His requests
and reports were ignored. and uh the insulting
station gave him the understanding of the pirates
he fought against and he now serves as one of
huron's chief mortal officers he wages war at
the head of vast creator armies and even leads
human regiments alongside red corsairs kind of
like a he's like a mini huron i guess uh and
now that the main the main red corsairs that
have some lore i just have the lore from this
book written down for them and he probably knows
more but there's uh garyan garyon the corpse
master the lord apothecary of the red corsairs
he's kind of a freak he's a og from badab he's
the greatest battle surgeon of the maelstrom
and he's the one who saved huron's life on the
way to the maelstrom he is wicked and obsessed
and very interested and knowledgeable in the
secrets of the dead and dying in the moments
of death kind of similar to illuminator's heiress
at times he might save you other times he might
watch you die and like experiment on you horrifically
and give you a terribly painful death uh whether
you're his buddy or his enemy he has a vast knowledge
of astartes physiology uh spanning across multiple
chapters and he's in charge of screening new
recruits for any potential debilitations mutations
or other issues that would taint the process
of becoming astartes or serving in the corsairs
is there anything else notable i you might have
wondered why I was so quiet at the beginning
of this pod. I was literally like searching through
some of the short stories. Some of these characters
have been in and they have like 10, 10 bits in
each one or so. Yeah. I think he has some stuff
in bad. I've wore books, but I am currently reading
those right now. So I'll get there. Why is Colin
and Hal having a laughing fit? They're so sorry.
Is that what happened in the game? Yeah, Andy
got a really good kill against some guy jitpicking
after him. And then he immediately rolled off
a fucking cliff. Yeah, but I didn't realize you
were going to be laughing five minutes later.
I was laughing because Colin was laughing. I've
been seeing that shoulder shake for five minutes.
I started laughing and then Hal kept laughing
so I kept laughing. Anyway, so the reason that
I was like very quiet at the beginning of the
thing was, yeah, he's in these books. I'll tell
you what I found. He worked with Arminius Valfex
who's actually got a model. He's a legend. Valfex
is not mentioned in this freaking book for some
reason. He's got the whips and he's a tech marine.
He's got back whip things and he's a really cool
mini. He's like master tech marine and he's There
we go. And he works within Hell's Iris. He works
within Hell's Iris because apparently their gene
seed is not doing too well. It's got an insanely
high rapid attrition rate, so they have to resort
to other warband origins to help them keep going.
He's very knowledgeable about space marine physiology.
He has a ship called the Specter of Ruin. And
at one point, Huron and him studied the Silver
Skulls as potentially a chapter they'd subsume
into their warband. And he tends to extort Huron
for favors because he's the one who saved his
life from taking a melter to the face during
the Badab War. So that kind of means you can
get a lot of favors, I suppose. And his model
is pretty cool. I love his mechanical finger.
Everyone thought he was going to be a world eater.
apothecary and they got baited yeah yeah poor
world yeah all right well that's that's gary
we'll hear more about him in a month or two whenever
that is uh then we have katar garrix the headsman
he's here on executioner that's about it but
he acts as um he's actually a former executioner
He is a former executioner, and he sometimes
acts as like a lieutenant leading his own group
of Astartes and soldiers where needed, but he
truly excels as John Duelist. He's like uber
strong, so he can use his two -handed axe like
a duelist weapon, and he's obsessed with slaying
worthy opponents with the axe of ending, and
he slays many consistent, he gets a consistent
stream. of Huron's adversaries to slay, whether
those are political or on the battlefield or
officers that Huron doesn't like anymore. And
he's a key component to keeping things in order.
But that's it. Yeah. He's mentioned in one book,
the Huron Blackheart book, very briefly for like
a couple of paragraphs he's there. And he's a
really good tactician, but he's an even better
butcher. He kills unworthy Red Corsairs who try
mutinies. He cuts their heads off. He knows that
Huron's basically the only ally he has in the
warband because he's not even like a proper Red
Corsair. He's like executioner's bloodline. And
he's the one who prosecuted the war on Chagoras
alongside Captain Onias Prey. So screw that guy.
He's dick. I hate him. Screw that guy. All right.
More excitingly, the two new characters, Captain
Sargota and the Enforcer. This captain is just
like an evil lady. Sargota. Sargota sounds like
one of the characters from Pirates of the Caribbean.
Sartosa is in the Pirates of the Caribbean, right?
Yeah. But she was once an accomplished Imperial
Officer of Battlefleet Solar. She's now the Chief
Void Tactician of Huron. Sargota. maneuvered
the political realm of the navy quite well and
she would advance pretty respectively uh respectively
but it was not fast enough for her liking so
she undercut a lot of people and she screwed
over a lot of people grabbing glory at any possible
time which was to the expense of others and all
of these enemies that she made would eventually
come back at her and like deface her in this
weird boarding incident that got her sent to
a backwater in the dwarveless subsector Here,
she would betray the people she was working for
and send the Imperial Naval Base's command codes
to raiders in the area, leaving them vulnerable,
which would lead to the murdering of thousands
and the theft of billions of tons of materials.
That was one of her many atrocities against the
Imperium, and she now commands the battlecruiser
Reign of Spite is Huron's go -between for traitor
naval officers. She provides some intel and prospects
for coded signals, system vulnerabilities, and
new prospects for potential betrayers. She often
accompanies the space marines in battle, just
for fun, I guess, floating atop her little command
throne that has tendrils that can commandeer
enemy ships and vehicles. She also helps evaluate
Huron's void captains and fleets, ensuring only
the best serve the tyrant of Badab. the new Lotara
Saren. Yeah, she's less cool Lotara, to be honest.
Because Lotara, in the law of the moment, is
like a blob inside the... I would say, yeah,
she's like half blob, half ghost who's upset
at everything she did. The Enforcer, the Turalyon
model that was not given to Tau, but was given
to Chaos, the first new alien auxiliary model.
uh was given to freaking chaos space marines
instead of the tau so i'll jump off a cliff i
guess i don't know i i i probably should have
gone to tao but i do appreciate when they acknowledge
that hey look it's not just you know space marines
that might fall the cat look look there are other
aliens too that might worship chaos well hold
on there she she's not corrupted by chaos doesn't
care about chaos never mind well they do have
beastmen as well to be fair they The Beastmen
get about as many Ws as they did in Warhammer
Fantasy, so zero. Anyways, the Enforcer is the
Crocodile Lady. She's here on Blackheart's Xenos
Bounty Hunter, also known as Cord 9 Sorgha. She
is a Turalyon. She's feared across the entire
Maelstrom. The Enforcer was once a soldier of
the great Doza Rul, which was a Turalyon war
pack. whose masters were slaughtered by the Red
Corsairs. The survivors, believing their masters
all slain, they swore oaths to Huron. Honor and
oaths are held to obsessive importance to these
aliens. However, when the group received summons
from survivors of their previous employer's cartel,
which they thought were dead but they're not,
they abandoned Huron. The enforcer saw this as
a disgusting sign of honor and returning to a
failing cartel is a sign of great weakness. So
over many months, She would hunt down her brethren
and eventually bring hundreds of Turalyon heads
to Blackheart as tribute. Huron quickly recognized
that she's kind of a baller and very loyal and
powerful and let Desinos become his chief bounty
hunter. And the enforcer now tracks down every
being ever that has ever slated Huron, whether
it be a fleeing officer, a renegade who speaks
out. A pirate group stealing fuel from the Red
Corsairs or any such thing. The Enforcer will
hunt them down. The ends of the earth. No one
can hide or run, no matter how far they go. She
always finds them. So she's Korsaro Khan from
the White Scars. Oh, okay. Master of the hunt.
Every bounty hunter is Korsaro Khan from the
White Scars, I guess. Does she have a big list
of people who have the grudge with the Warband
that they hunt down? Did you guys know that Boba
Fett is actually Corsaro Khan from The White
Scars? Yes, he is. Okay, anyway. The Turalyon,
she's also Chiron's eyes, ears, and mouth and
blade amongst the many Xenos associates of the
Corsairs. Alongside her is this dog thing, which
is a very dangerous creature called a Vargesi.
which I've seen the theoretical pictures of these
before. They do not look like dogs. The Barwa?
The Bargesi. They're aliens. They're Xenos. I
think they're vaguely related to the Dark Eldar,
or at least they have some in cages somewhere.
Yeah, I think they're mentioned every once in
a while, but they don't look like... The pictures
that I've seen of them look nothing like dogs,
but I guess it's a dog. But they're known...
These Xenos are known to be as small as rats,
and they infest space stations and stuff, and
they can grow. They have random... growth spurts
and bouts of like unbelievable violence and they
can grow to be the size of said space station
and just kill everybody but she found this dog
thing it tore off her arm but she was able to
subdue it and steal a a strange alien control
mechanism from the person that she was there
to kill and this subdues most of its violent
tendencies she called it plunder and she has
no idea how long It's going to stay this size.
She assumes that it'll eventually grow out of
its Xenos control mechanism. And at that point,
she'll probably have to part ways. But it's a
very useful little doggie right now. Did you
want to cover Garlon's Soul Eater? There's not
much. Oh, sorry. I wrote him down, but I missed
him by accident. Yeah, yeah, I will. I completely
skipped him. He's the chief spy master and sorcerer
of Mr. Huron. He was once a librarian of the
Mantis Warriors. We'll probably hear more about
him in the Battle of War episode. And he now
feels pretty much any psychic role that Huron
requires. He's a master of manipulation and mind
control. He can tear information out of brains
no problem. It is said that no one has seen Garland's
face, which is not true, but it's a nice... reputation
to have and it's unknown if he can remove his
helmet also massive creep um at least from what
i read in his little short where um i've got
a quote for you it's only a little one garlon
rubbed his bony hands together eagerly his wet
tongue licking his thin lips in anticipation
of some future pleasure oh well he's weird he's
weird yuck put him in the bin yuck It's giving
Take My Strong Hand energy. We have a couple
donations. We might as well read those before
we get into the one second of Eldar lore that
we get in this book. Nice. R .I .P. Yeah. Setter9,
thank you for the D50 ,000. Thank you very much.
I'm not familiar with that currency, but thank
you. When are you guys going to cover the rise
and fall of the Roman Empire? Colin, what are
your opinions on the Western Roman Empire? I
did a Conquer All of the Map campaign as the
Western Roman Empire and Barbarian Invasion and
CBT. I'm afraid to try it in Attila, where I've
heard it's infinitely worse and Barbarian Invasion
is already hard as the Western Roman Empire.
It all went downhill once they moved the capital
to Ravenna, in my opinion. I have not played
these video games. That's just a lot of history,
not the game. But in a way, isn't history just
an old form of saying video game? You know, civilizations
have progress bars and loading screens and people
despawn and respawn. It's a game. Okay, Grandpa,
let's get you back to the retirement home. I'm
losing out the PS2, don't worry. Sykes12146,
thank you for the five. Once again, asking for
a sisters video soon. I bet we'll do that soon.
Also, hope you... What? This guy wants to see
our sisters? That's crazy. I wasn't done reading
that. Also, hope you lot are good, and thank
you for getting through many days at work. Even
you, Hal. Wow, thank you, man. wow the contempt
you could i haven't i i need to go back to the
sisters trilogy because i read the first one
and i haven't gotten into the other ones but
it's such a good book and i'd love to do a sisters
episode there's some fun stuff like honestly
i quite enjoyed the celestine stuff i've started
efriel stern like i don't know her graphic novels
just not her book yet um there's there's like
the the james swallow books which i haven't done
yet there's book of martyrs there's that new
one that just came out with the banner lady who's
like got the like proper you know karen haircut
going on i can't remember her name she's on the
cover and she's like ah and that's that's the
book challenge for a sister's novel survive to
the end yeah being more than one yeah all right
uh we now get our one minute of elder lore it's
a little bit more than a minute but it's something
huge huge dust BRB, I'm going for a leak. It's
the raid on the Crimson Eyrie. Oh my gosh, he's
actually leaving. That's unbelievable. After
receiving intel that a Red Corsair's fleet containing
prisoners from Alaytok was on its way to the
void station known as the Crimson Eyrie, Mr.
Prince Uriel and his Corsairs would attack them.
The Admiral split his fleet in two, sending the
faster ships to... continue the pursuit of the
Red Corsairs that moved to the Void Station.
They would activate their hollow fields and stay
out of Auspex range and wait for the Space Marines
to begin unloading their cargo and prisoners
before launching the ambush. This would draw
the Corsairs' vessels away from the station,
while Uriel's flagship and dragon ship would
make for the gravity well of the system's largest
planet, go around, and slingshot to the station
so that they could extract the prisoners. Here
on Blackheart, meanwhile, was on his way And
on his jolly way to thop at this classic place,
the Erie, for them to offload some of their cargo
and let his guys just chill for a little bit.
His temporary flagship was a strike cruiser,
the Tarini Incarnate. It was in the midst of
refueling when the enemy was detected. The ship
was swiftly returned to battle readiness and
the Xeno stacked. Meanwhile... Prince Uriel would
approach the station and begin the debording
actions. Initial progress was very good and swift
and successful, as the Eldar easily were slaying
the dudes inside the station because they're
just humans, renegade defenders. And they began
freeing the Eletaki prisoners. And with the guidance
of Karseth, Uriel and his elite went into the
depths to recover many Eldar relics and spirit
stones. all was going great until the red corsairs
joined the fight for the station here on realized
his error and turned his five cruisers to turn
about and attack the now unmanned dragon ship
uh uriel fought valiantly and well slain many
but his own soldiers cannot match They spaced
the marines, unfortunately, and so their retreat
was called, for they had already overstayed their
welcome and had at least recovered a portion
of the prisoners and artifacts. The Flame of
Azer -Yan, which is Uriel's ship, was peeling
away, but Jade Criss, the other dragon ship,
was still stationary when Huron's ships showed
up. Huron ordered the pursuit of the escaping
vessel, while Tyranny incarnate approached the
Jade Criss and hit it with a broadside. He would
conduct boarding actions, and after... Being
repelled from the bridge multiple times, Huron
decided it's his own moment to step up and pull
up. Meanwhile, his ship sends harpoons into the
Eldar vessel and destroys their engines so they
can't go anywhere. The sorcerers make a hole
in reality and Huron steps onto the ship and
he kills everybody. He impales the Eldar Baron
upon the Tyrant's Claw and immolates him. Prince
Uriel escapes. Huron found some victory. and
all that was it but he was he was he was it was
a slight on his honor so sorry other bros yep
your honor has been slighted tune in next year
for your next floor yeah by the way by the way
freaking they post up they post up with this
freaking picture when you're reading the thing
and you're like all excited oh, Huron and Prince
Uriel are going to fight. And then they don't
even like, they don't even see each other. They
don't even make eye contact. We'll say for the
audio listeners, it's just their two models placed
next to each other. It's an old diagram. It's
like, oh, we're going to put Abaddon next to
her. They're clearly fighting in this image.
That's the idea of it. If it was artwork, I think
I would be even more pissed, to be fair. could
you imagine if they were like oh we're doing
a refresh of the black legion and the old marine
stuff that's come out and say here's gilliman
next to abaddon it's like are they gonna fight
it's like no they're the galaxy away look at
this look at this wacky piece of art can you
see that reminds me of um uh you described the
oh my gosh what's the movie called event horizon
when the guy's like strung out with his skin
it's a dude who's chained up and is He's missing
the lower half of himself. And there's maggots
coming out of his peeled open belly. And they're
eating these entrails and maggots and stuff.
I don't know why when you said Event Horizon,
I first thought of the movie Interstellar. I'm
like, did we watch two different versions of
Interstellar? I don't remember anything like
that happening in that movie. Here's another.
Matthew McConaughey crying, looking at that image.
No, no. The maggots. A little cool. sections
back here with just one two like random quotes
and stuff but yeah that's the book i mean it's
got some stuff it's not it's not nothing it's
not worth your hundred dollars i'll tell you
that much but it's uh it's it's something so
thank thank you for donating so i can afford
to buy these stupid books and read them for more
crimes we appreciate it very much yeah it's still
i mean i appreciate and do they have different
like detachments and other style things yeah
they have like the rules and stuff for those
books but those are all on wahapedia within like
a month so i don't know it did have what was
cool is the custom character creation stuff like
that i've seen some people have gone wacky with
it although when i wanted to do an idea like
a thousand suns there's no thousand suns one
except a zangor leader yeah i was there was some
that were not optimal, but I don't know. They
were cool. I wish that they were legal in events
and stuff, but it's okay. You can make a broadside
character, which is kind of cool, or a trepidatorian
character. I don't know. Now you know a little
bit more about the Maelstrom, and not much more
about the other half of the box set, the Eldar.
But we should... There's more stuff, I think,
coming. Is it Ioterra's the next one? Yeah, we're
in the end of an edition, so they release $500
worth of supplement books that you get to use
for one month. They've done this since 7th edition.
It's so goofy. Goofy is one word. Yeah. I will
not be purchasing the next one. My friend plays
Iron Warriors. He's getting that. I'm going to
borrow the lore book, and then I'll do that.
I did pre -order these Twinlands. I'm guilty,
Your Honor. I did do that. I am buying them.
Are they severely under -costed, people were
saying? Not in terms of money. Yeah, they're
over -costed in money and under -costed in points.
Their data sheet has like six guns on it. It's
super goofy. And they brought back old classic
jetpack rules that were in like 6th edition where
you got to move after you shot. Good old days!
And it's come back. Nice. We do then, if it's
ready, we have... uh some models of the week
guys which we have been sorting through your
stuff again if you made it well if you like us
a little bit you know let me twist our hair a
bit if you like us um we are on the discord we
have our discord server which is pretty i would
say people are in there people are like actually
yeah And we have a little tabletop section for
people to post what they're currently working
on. Some of you guys are really, really good,
by the way. It's a crazy picture in the crazy
picture in general chat for all you to see, actually.
Yeah. And but we have chosen some of our favorites
from the last few weeks because we very much
appreciate it. And we're going to go through
just to have a little look and give a shout out
to you guys who are. First of all, some people
are doing some cool conversions and some cool
painting. Shout out Donkey Man in general. What
the fuck is that? Thank you, Eli. It's made by
Tom Nom. Wow. Okay. What do we have here? So
the first one here, this one is by ST Wagons.
It's Harley Quinn's. I think if I remember, if
I had to double check. Did he say it was for
a classic scheme? He said, it was a known lore,
been all but retconned away. Harlequin vehicles
have unique flavors, and this one would be Mango
Surprise. Yeah. Really vibrant. Like, that thing
is a punch to the eyes. I like that. It does
look tasty. Yeah. It looks like hot candy. He's
used some fluorescents, I think, on that, particularly
the magenta. Damn cool, man. That's a way to
make a model unique. I appreciate it, man. That's
really cool. The next one we got here. This one's
the one I picked from Mr. Ivar, which I think
this one's called. It's a dwarf. Pretty nice.
They have some crazy painters in the chat. This
is... This is like decades away. A whole technology
tree above me. I'm still in the Iron Age and
motherfuckers rocking up with the Space Age.
I'm in the Stone Age. It's got tattoos on it.
Non -metallic metal. The metal alone is crazy.
It's got that... Do you guys know Golden Axe,
the old game? It kind of reminds me of that.
It's like that retro... color not how i don't
know how you describe it but like the color scheme
reminds me of like older minis but just done
really well i see what you mean yeah i'm afraid
i don't know what golden x is but i do see what
you mean that's really good man that thing's
tiny all that model is as well yeah i like the
hair too uh let's see and the next one here this
one is from green hat guy He's coming in strong
again. Loyalist of the channel. I picked these
wacky Slaanesh thingy conversions. I don't know
what they're supposed to pay us, but I like them.
Yeah, I'm not... I honestly don't know off the
top of my head what these are from. They might
be for characters for Age of Sigmar. That's what
I'm guessing. I'm guessing some of these look
like the Hedonites of Slaanesh, but I'm not entirely
sure what exactly. On the middle one, those back,
not quite pauldrons, they look like an Eldar.
Like some of them might be like, I don't know,
it's hard or something, but. They are the three.
Damn. I like the one on the left. There's a big.
World's war band. Oh, okay. I bet those these
up. Thrice born. Yeah. Pink, pink, metallic metal
actually goes quite hard. This is insanely cool.
Okay, these are really just models. That's cool.
These were conversions. Once again, fantasy and
everything getting the better. iOS models continue
to eat well. I like the snake thing and I like
the forearms. That's looking cool. By the way,
Colin, did you perchance have, before I pick
this last one, last week's or last time's question
of the week answers from the previous episode?
I was grabbing... No, I got the new question.
I didn't know I was doing that too. I might need
a moment in that case. My apologies. That's okay.
I will buy some time with this last one because
this one is so impressive. Look, you just say
the line, Bart, such is the power of Nagash.
Yeah, that's what I assumed was being picked
for Colin. Yeah, this one is insane. I know what
I'm about. Again, the space age. What the heck?
He's got a logo. Damn. everyone's everyone say
the line in chat you you know damn well what
the line is is that airbrushed as well the the
ghoulie ghosts because that looks so good damn
i really like the the red on his uh staff actually
because it's yeah just it makes it seem so stark
compared to the rest of the model that you're
eyes is kind of dark to that after you like had
a look at the ghosts i also like how the the
kind of gold the gilded parts aren't too bright
or or like saturated so it doesn't look garish
compared to the rest of the minute it's like
it's a bit subtle it's a bit restrained it's
it doesn't look tarnished but it doesn't at the
same time look a bit too ostentatious it like
it's a nice like pairing with the bones so it
doesn't look too over the top and detract from
the color. Yeah, it's good. And look at that
shading on his tummy. That tummy shading. Yeah,
true. Very cool. What is that, like a 30 -pack
or something of weird knots? Guy's got crazy
waist -to -chest ratio. He's got that Dorito
shape. He touches his power. Yeah. Bro wearing
a corset every day for the boys. Hey, he's cool.
Also, is that a sword on his hip? He's got a
sword, too. It doesn't need it, but like, why
wouldn't you have one? I don't know. It's like,
here's me with my Abrams with my spud gun. Like,
do we need that? Well, let's not have a Space
Marine fan talk about things being over -designed
and unnecessary attachments now. I'm a White
Scars player. What do I bring to the table? Fucking
piss and shit? I bring a Delaware and a bicycle.
I bring a bicycle. Yeah, and that was our minis
of the week. So please check out our Discord
if you would like to submit more minis. And if
you've already posted something on our mini of
the week that we haven't picked before, feel
free to repost it because then it might be that
case of like, we've seen something quite a while
ago and then we picked something and then we
missed other bits. So always post what you want
us to share. Yes. Colin, how are we doing? i've
uh i've got them i've uh i've got the last three
from last or the three chosen from last week
it was uh okay hashtag flesh is weak you know
what do you what are you ripping out and replacing
with metal bits right or you know some kind of
augmentation from sodius max uh i'm trading in
all my sweat glands for a proper liquid cooling
system oh and mostly i like i'm curious of the
mental image of that How would that work? That's
what I mean. That's why I like that answer. How
would that work? Are we going some kind of cyberpunk
something? Or is it just like mini computer fans
in your veins? And AC units strapped to your
back. That's why I'm curious. Self -cooling would
be awesome. I'm always too warm. That would be,
oh my gosh. I'm always too cold. What do you
mean the best answer ever? i'd go the other way
around give me like a heating system i'm always
freezing uh and then rare is pepe uh i just just
me too man before oh never mind yeah no you uh
i would replace my pancreas with a fully working
cyber one not that i need to i just want to deprive
colin wow thanks wow wow and then Magos of Mars,
who's completely on my level. This is so real.
I'm with Colin. I'm going full Grievous. Forearms,
claw feet, voice modulator, cool single wheel
unicycle. So too, brother. Glory to the CIS.
Count Dooku was a visionary. Grievous was a hero.
This is the truth. This is the truth. The core
world elites won't tell you. That's right. That's
right. Death to the Republic. Why? Imagine you
get in an argument with someone and instead of
stroppily walking off, they just fold into the
unicycle. I'm going the other way. Imagine you
get in an argument with someone, their arms split
into four and they pull out four fucking knives
on you. I'm out. No thank you. Average mum law.
I've seen the 2D Clone Wars. I'm losing this
fight. I'm not him. He's just in the pub and
he's like, I've been drained in your Jedi arts
by Count Dooku. He's like, I spilled your drink.
Calm down. Where's proportionality? And did we
have another question for this week? We had...
Who were you pulling up with? Something like
that. Oh, yes. So it was a... Hashtag crew. Yeah,
hashtag crew. You're going into the Maelstrom
to conquer it. Who are you taking in your crew?
Hashtag crew. I'm taking Justin, was it Roiland
or Roland? The voice of Rick and Morty because
it would just be annoying enough for me to end
it all. And therefore I would want to get the
job done really quickly. So it would be my motivation.
Have you seen that game? Was the game his company
makes? High on Life? Yes, I thought that's what
it was. If you watch any of that gameplay and
you see his voice pop up in any of those games,
it's designed to inflict suffering eventually.
That's my thought process. That's been in my
head recently, that game. I thought, you know
what? That would get me to finish the job because
I'd be like, I need to stop doing this. Wow.
Wow. I see you. I'd bring Hal, because his deviousness
would be so alluring to Huron that I could trade
him for my safe passage. I'll be a pal. I've
already made this my running bit, so to invade
the Maelstrom, I would like to bring the entirety
of the CIS military. That'd be awesome. Droids
aren't going to be corrupted by chaos. No. I'd
bring you. I'd bring you free because it'd be
funny. We can all die horribly together. Yeah.
Or maybe steal a pirate ship before we die and
get shoved into a sun or something. We'll get
turned into mewling messes in the wall. Thanks,
Andy. We'll be flesh chairs together. Yay! Where
one of us ends, where he'll begin. We get to
be a couch. Law Crimes Edition. Oh no, get us
out of Comora. Someone said, I would bring the
grave mine. Wow. I might put my money on the
grave mine. Bring the flood. We have some donuts
to read before we're done. We do. Shambeferoid.
It's pronounced Shambeferoid. You cannot escape
Shambeferoid. Will we be getting a fantasy fireside
on the Warrior Priests of Sigmar? Shambef. Thanks,
bro. I love those guys. I'm going to need to
really lock in to do an entire video just about
the Warrior Priests of Sigmar. I think I might
be able to manage it, but I'm going to need to
really lock in for that one. That is not my usual
style of things. Tanith was an inside job. Thank
you very much for two more dollars. I might go
by XCOM. Spacewolves die and stupefaction should
explode. We got two from Drakons. Buy GW product.
Complain about GW product. Eagerly await next
GW product. Repeat. Warhammer fans are like football
fans. We're here to suffer. We are here to suffer.
Huge shout out to the Chicago Bears moving to
Indiana. Now I only need to drive 40 minutes
to then drive back home 40 minutes crying and
weeping over the travesty of that fucking football
team. He was bought into it. He can't change.
I can't escape. I'm not happy about it. Again,
thank you very much for the $5. Request a Touch
Grass Discord channel for the purpose of encouraging
people to touch grass. I won't think about it.
We might. Patriot fans, kill yourself. Green
Bay fans, don't do it because I need to do it.
Total cheesehead death. Thank you, Document USA
for the five bucks again, man. How that just
avoided it is going in the supercut. Thanks,
man. Amazing. And that's us. That was the lore
of the Maelstrom. Again, the new stuff coming
out, hopefully it'll go somewhere. That and 500
Worlds, we're just going to have to see how the
mileage varies with how much they support it.
I feel like they're going to forget about it,
to be honest, but who knows. There was no actual
lore progression in this supplement, other than
Prince Uriel. losing a fight. He's there like,
I'm not part of the Inari anymore. All of Prince
Uriel's, it reads like a failed fucking lethal
company run. He showed up looking for stuff.
He got no stuff and left. Awesome. We're in this
weird dynamic of we don't want any progress,
and yet when we... get something and we expect
there to be progress then there is not and it's
even more disappointing like it's because ever
since the ever since the fall of katie they've
been making progress but they chose they had
two options they had no progress and keep the
setting as like the sandbox it was or progress
and they've chosen the middle ground where everything
happens but nothing happens They don't need progress.
Now Huron's going to do this thing. They don't
have to progress the whole thing. It's with the
two pirate factions. They can do a million things
that don't actually advance anything and they
still somehow did nothing. But here's the crucial
part. We've got the best lore we've had in the
last 40 years recently. Apparently. Didn't you
hear that Tyboros is now Primaris? Great. Wow.
I take back what I said about Huron. I like Tiberos,
and he is the most overhyped space marine ever.
Yeah. I thought we were done hearing the word
primaris. I guess we got a little bit left to
go. I'm afraid that is the default now. Not until
we have Gabriel Seth specifically say, okay,
I took the juice. Okay, Gabriel, you don't hate
them anymore. There's more manlit oppression.
They kill off the only trueborn space marines
and they make the other ones take the... The
height lift pill. Space Marines heard that a
height filter was coming to Tinder, so they were
like, right, get the Primaris out. We've got
to be a bit taller. We've got to get over the
threshold. I swear. Exactly. I guess see you
guys soon. Bye. Bye, everybody.