Hello, ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
it's Lore Crimes! Yay! Happy 10th anniversary
to Age of Sigmar. And to mark the occasion, and
we definitely planned this, we have a special
guest today. Who's this chappy in the middle?
Who's this? Hello, who are you? Hello, my name
is Rob. Oh, his name is Rob. Rob, hello, Rob.
Welcome to War Crimes. Rob of The Honest Wargamer,
and also just this last week or so, The Honest
Heresy, which is also a channel. So there's lots
of cool stuff you guys can check out. Indeed.
But, Hal, what are we talking about today? Tabletop
Boys. Oh, I can let the hate flow. Everyone's
ready to go. We asked everyone, again, check
out our Discord because the brilliant people
over in there, you beautiful old criminals, we
asked you for, again, it's another episode of
We Listen and We Don't Judge, but we listened
and we asked for tabletop hot takes. This could
be from anything to do with the tabletop at the
moment. I even asked people to share your horror
stories if you need to, get it off your chest.
I mean, I will let it speak for itself, really,
though. So we've got quite a few to go through,
though. And again, really appreciate you guys
for putting your responses there. If you want
to possibly have their answer featured in another
episode in the future, obviously join the Discord.
Please do. I think we're near 1 ,000 or something.
We're near 1 ,000. Pretty good. Not too bad for
only a few months. Appreciate you guys. Appreciate
also the massive amount of pictures making fun
of our hairlines. Quite a few of those. Every
single week. Appreciate the hairline disses.
That's been particularly aggressive. and the
guy who's making my face snaps in every single
piece of Warhammer art that is ever made. That
gets to be a really cool ongoing segment for
all of you, it seems. Yeah. I saw one recently
where it was me and Colin as Porus and the Emperor
fighting each other. And then there was one where
it was a Genestealer cult and every one of them
was Eli and then one of them was Colin. There's
some fun stuff in there. Lots of memes. Also,
speaking of memes, I played Total War Hammer
for the first time. You can watch my mid -game
play. Anyway, I tried my best. So, I've had a
quick peek at some of the ones we've... pad uh
did you want to start us off how with the uh
the the first hot take yes i do uh this one's
pretty nice and easy because this is from another
fellow warhammer creator though uh mr gaming
storyteller dutch himself uh his first hot take
was that if a rule has more than five sentences
i ain't reading all that i'm sorry that happened
or i'm happy for you Which is crazy. This guy
hates flavor. This man would never play the old
world. This guy hates intricacy. I think it puts
a lot of people off, to be fair. Doesn't it?
I would say... Not my problem! That's why books
are lame. Too many words. That's why famously
books suck. I can't read. I listen to audiobooks.
That's how I do my videos. A pop -up book would
be cool. He's mad. Is he mad at? The Emperor.
Poor, you know, horror's looking absolutely,
you know, innocent and, like, handsome in one
start of the book and then absolutely jacked
and evil at the end of the book. I'm not sure.
As most Warhammer things, it's not appropriate
for kids. But as a grown man, we'll be buying
Warhammer things. Warhammer Kids is right there.
And apparently, according to Mr. Bones, quite
dark in places. Like, oh, and this character
died. Well, yeah, a kid gets a... Evaporated
by a Necron. They don't show it, but he's on
page one. One panel, he's on page. The next,
he's just gone. Visibly getting electrocuted
in between, I think. Can you spell vivisection?
Okay. The world today on Sesame Street is atomized.
Well, that is pretty dark. Speaking of kind of
something similar to that, the next one was by
Frag, who says... You don't have to know the
lore to enjoy the tabletop. That's true. I mean,
how would people feel about this one? I'm pretty
confident. It's true. It's true, but Warhammer
isn't actually that good of a game system. So
if you don't know the lore, it's not that great,
in my opinion. And you can just go play other
games that are better. It's still fun. The lore
is what really makes it good for me, though.
What's your general... How much Warhammer lore
knowledge would you say you have? Me? Yeah, Rob.
Sorry, I missed my name. I would say, depending
on the system, above an average person's amount
of lore, but below all of you. significantly
well i mean we unfortunately you say that but
like you could probably top me but i would say
that like i know literally nothing about age
of sigma and the only reason i know anything
about fantasy which is not much is because of
colin but i'll say that i know most of the stuff
about 40k so i even in like warhammer is like
a blanket term some people like i'm kind of an
age of sigma fan or i'm a warhammer 40k fan or
there or there are these people who also like
necromunda and i'm like i have no idea about
necromunda but i know everything else in 40k
so like there's all sorts of supremacy Would
you say, Rob, knowing more law makes you a better
painter, though? Yes, absolutely. I'd actually
say that really helps for you to identify your
dudes. I think one of the interesting things
about rules and the law is you obviously want
some like ludonarrative harmony if it's possible
to achieve, but it really is dependent on like
how complex. the system is trying to simulate.
It depends, actually. One of the things I think
is most interesting in most of the game systems
games which are produced, they don't actually
ever give you an intentional, like, goal. Like,
is this meant to be like a light interface with
lore and the setting a la 40K and Age of Sigmar?
Or is it meant to be like a, you know, like an
almost simulation representation of an attempted
battle, i .e. the heresy and the old world or
is it actually just meant to be because you're
a freak like necrobunda like we don't know uh
so like it's interesting i think everyone gets
their own thing out of what what any of the game
systems could be but i think the law does make
it better um for sure like that's why i play
the games i would think i'd even add on to that
and say something like particularly with like
a lot of the 40k or even most armies like again
there's like you have there's a reason why people
design painting schemes as like this is an army
painting scheme because you've got to do a lot
of the same guys you look exactly the same but
if you have things like war cry or kill teams
knowing more law means you can actually like
make your guy like a bit different or specialize
people actually add on you know like a lot of
if you don't know about certain things with chaos,
you can't necessarily chaos up your, you know,
night laws, war band or something like that,
or like little things. I think law, it definitely
helps, but I do agree with the, um, original
comment. You don't have to know law, but it,
I mean, it really, it brings like a, I mean,
what was it? Andy, you said like a while ago,
like a lot of people have, um, use their stuff,
like no, like correct markings or like certain,
like some people do want miniatures to be like,
properly accurate i all my like legion and chapter
stuff it's like this goes on this kneecap and
this goes here and it's this color scheme but
like how has anyone ever even heard of someone
being like uh sorry you're you're you're like
heavy bolter guys aren't actually there and they've
got the wrong tactical marking on their shoulder
they shouldn't be in the thing like has there
ever ever anyone been like that nitpicky about
the law and the tabletop or is that it should
be i'm sure someone has said that but then they
also have no friends so like also the law law
makes a mistake sometimes as well like so for
instance right now in age of sigma archion with
his sword the slayer of kings famous through
all of fantasy is rend one but a black coat that's
not right literally a ghost a ghost cart with
a wheel the wheel is rend two Knowing the law
makes it worse for me in that situation. Undead
stay winning. Another vampire. Sword so blunt
you should use it for a horse and carriage. Wow.
I guess a lot of things. To make a balanced game,
the law is not balanced. Because space means
me winning everything. Yeah, it would be like...
The Eldar would have a movement speed of, like,
the table. The Space Marines just don't die.
I think someone made a lore -accurate Space Marine
Army one. They made the rule, yeah. It was, like,
300 points for a tactical Marine. And then when
they are winning, it's like, oh, Leagues of Wotan
are winning, like, on release. Ah, stop that.
We don't want to make more of those. Put them
on the burner. Other way around, though, the
faction can have literally no lore. like the
leagues of otan all right model range it looks
good but like then you have to learn about leagues
of otan law and then you almost want to give
up on life so it's almost like is it not good
that was number one leagues it's not there It
is not there. Every Leagues of Wotan release
is another release that isn't a Primaris Lieutenant,
so we need them. I'll have you know they have
a... Pardon me, a Thousand Sons failure guy.
Bro, we got a crappy robot thing. Already in
pain. Hey, you could be a Grey Knights player.
Yeah, for real. Moving on to the next one, again.
I appreciate everyone. Thank you so much for
commenting. This is where it gets a bit more
like people have things to say. Yeah. Okay. Big
one. Yeah. Next one's by a trash Fox, uh, comma,
uh, DGN or DGN, uh, tabletop hot take space wolves
are cooler than half the legions because at least
Vikings is a theme you can flesh out more than.
you know, in quotes, oh, we're so stoic and good
at building, obviously a massive shout out to
Imperial Fists. Alright, alright. One of these
days people will care about the Imperial Fists.
Or, we sure do love stealth, even though we're
walking tanks in power armor. And he's like,
I'm not even a Space Wolf enjoyer that much.
Also, Wolfen get... too much of a bad rep for
one shite series of sculpts werewolf marines
is a cool and absurd concept for 40k that just
fits as well as blood angels uh and then there's
another one is like we're vampires and drinks
blood because we crave it also for some reason
have a second gene seed defect because psycho
echo yada yada uh there's been plenty of shite
first drafts for warhammer art and one good new
drawing or sculpt could give me the werewolf
marines i crave Also, werewolf dreadnought is
a stupid awesome thing. Motorfang sweeps. Tabletop
-ish at least, mainly from the model aesthetic
aside. This guy's so real. This guy's the realest
lore criminal on the planet. Bless you. God bless
you. What I never understood is space marines,
if you're a human and a space marine lands from
the sky, that's quite scary. I don't think that
if you have a bat on your shoulder pad, it makes
you more scary. It doesn't make me more scared.
I'm like, I'm already scared. You're a freak
who's landed from the heavens. Like the bat is
actually pretty normal. He crashes down and then
blank stare. And then he goes, ooga booga. And
then you run away. Yeah, yeah. Poor fellas. I
mean, there's like, it kind of draws down to
like a common thing of like, man, they really
do be borrowing lore from everything else except
its own thing. The idea of original in Warhammer
is probably taboo in some sense. It's such a
mishmash that it becomes original because it's
everything. It's literally... Imagine every ingredient
in your kitchen and throw it in the pot and it
somehow came out good. But definitely, I would
say... Is that the Three Stooges legal defense?
If there's too many lawsuits going through the
door, they can't get through. I mean, how do
people feel about Wolfen, though? That's a particular
thing brought up in the... I mean, I hate to
bring up the lore side of it, because it just
still bugs me. Check out our Ragnar episode if
you want to have a full thing, but they're not
called Wolfen because they look like werewolves.
They're called Wolfen because when Primarch Leman
Russ was like, hey, that's all, you know, the
Emperors arrived, let's all become space wolves.
There was one sadistic, betraying general called
Wolfen, and because he had evil in his heart,
he turned into a wolf. Is that what happened?
The Arkham Land thing. Yeah, that's really what
happened. He was just called Wolfen. But the
actual, like, gene defect Wolfen stuff is cool.
Hmm. Sure. Werewolf Space Marines are pretty
cool, but their models sure do suck. And we can
all agree furries are cool. Yeah. Well, the thing
is, the only thing about Wolfen, though, we've
just had a refresh for Space Wolves. Are we going
to get new Wolfen models? Ignore that. We were
on a bit of drugs. Don't worry about that. They're
still kind of new, at least for a... someone
like me, 7th edition doesn't feel like it was
that long ago. They were certainly a mistake.
When you were a child? Well, I was probably like
16 or 17. It was only a decade. Yeah. I don't
know. I just don't like the wolves. The only
trouble is that like... Sorry. I don't know.
I have little meaningful input because I just
don't like the wolves. They're not... They're
not fun Vikings. There's so much you can do with
Vikings. Wolf. I don't know. I'm not the biggest
fan. Do people prefer heresy scheme or 40k scheme?
40k. Heresy is just great. It's unpainted models,
bro. For Space Wolves? Yeah, do you prefer heresy
scheme or... all right i i dig that because obviously
there's like the like the red accents and a lot
of their markings as well and i think it's like
a full army set i think it looks better but i'm
aware like this the newer sculpts for like like
logan grim now like all the current space wall
stuff does look pretty damn good some of those
heresy models you could be looking short and
stout i think the 40k paint scheme fits better
in uh in like a snowing environment paints it
up and there's like yeah and the red moors look
awesome with like the the bloody helmet design
they're like look at me i like eating i love
i love the wolf helmet i love the wolf by the
way no no okay i remember the horse heresy one
sucking but the 40k ones i still love them The
only thing is, with the whole theme stuff, there
are some really cool ones. I like the Celestial
Lines, where it's overt African culture influence.
But there's such an obscure chapter, you never
see any of that. But then you'll have something
like Space Wars, where it's like, ah, Vikings.
Cool. Can we have more stuff on this weird, obscure
chapter that has cool stuff that they don't tap
into? And they're like, nah. Nah. No, they don't
sell too good. What do you do? for for rob like
do you when you do like kitbash like do you do
kitbash like much like generally with like if
you're doing space marines or anything like that
have you done that before uh yes uh i have just
i'm actually building a heresy army now for the
for the launch of the new edition so i'm super
excited about that and i'm doing a bunch of mark
3 excited for doing some mark 2 And I'm really
enjoying the Build -A -Bear. Like, oh, this one's
going to get a power sword. This one's going
to have a gun. So I'm really enjoying that element
of it. And I'm really enjoying the granularity
of being able to do that in the Heresy versus
if you were to try and do that in... Because
it doesn't really matter what you have in 40k
or AOS at the moment. And in Old World, it matters.
But, you know... A dude on a dragon can have
whatever he wants, so it's fine. When you've
got a dragon, all bets are off. Have a shotgun,
why not? I haven't played Old World, but I played
Old Fantasy, but my friend plays it and he really
likes the generic magic items that you can model
onto your models, like you can put an orc on
a flying carpet or something like that. That
sounds very fun. Yeah, well, generic banners
is super fun. Like, that's really, really cool.
I wish we had more banners generally across all
game systems, especially. And also, like, I'm
sure all of you know much better than me, but
I'm sure there are a bunch of, like, really famous
weapons, guns, armors, and it would be fun to
have them as kits that you could buy. Yeah, you
mean you don't want every Chaos Space Marine
to have a cursed weapon one and a cursed weapon
two? You want this thing to be actually interesting?
Unbelievable. oh brother um i'm so i it's within
my soul that i wish to have a heresy army but
i just the wallet is not willing i already have
two 40k armies um but it's the um in thousand
suns in like from the law side of it there's
a character called sanact who he has two copesh's
and like i think one is like a jackal head silver
pommel and the other one's like a golden and
like marble inlay and i'm like It'd be so cool
to have things like specialized weapons on characters
and things like that. I mean, I think 40k ones,
you can only really think of people kind of like
chapter masters or something. There's like Logan
Grimnaw is the only one I can really think of,
which is like, that's utterly unique to him.
Whereas a lot of them are just like, oh, glad
he is. Although there is that poor example of
the Votan model that's like a commemorative store
anniversary one. And you can't use it on the
tabletop anymore because they updated them in
10th edition and his loadout is not possible.
It's like, oh, thanks. This brand new miniature
that's like less than a year old, I can't use
on my arm anymore. You pranked. Whoops. So comical.
So comical. Lucius' lair blade looks pretty sexy
in his model. yeah i'd love to see more of that
like but i've been building some dudes and it's
super fun like having all the weapon options
it'd be fun to see relics and stuff as something
you can actually purchase and give to someone
especially if you themed them around the the
legion slash chapters that would be great that's
how the game used to be was it in ninth eli where
like you could almost design your own kind of
hq i mean when it would that was from like that
was in sixth and seventh and ninth and they just
eradicated all things related to work here in
10th edition i was kind of in fifth edition too
i think that's when i started but yeah i was
kind of absent in eighth they made the game a
little bit good again in ninth and then they
decided that they didn't like doing that in 10th
so well uh speaking of more hot takes so we and
we have another one by actual vulcan who says
my hot take is gw's lack of any official practice
spaces for the game So if you don't know how
to play or work with the stat sheet, they do
work with the stat sheet. They do offer it to
younger child and then players and occasionally
hold events. But when you're someone like me,
God, I'm flubbing this up. I'm literally terrible
at this. Like me, who doesn't have a play group
and is trying to find a space to learn the tabletop
side of this hobby and finding actually nothing
from the official company who boasts in a...
come and play attitude in brackets at least in
my area it's honestly deflating because it's
so hard to insert yourself into whether it's
tournaments official games or narrative play
with experienced players and you're sitting at
the side trying to find a way to play a newbie
game i know um there are ways to do it with community
spaces or tabletop sim but gw lacks of a learn
to wait of a learn to play experience system
for older players it's draining brackets especially
if you have a new person or new person who has
anxieties it's a very fair point i mean and how
much does people play the tabletop here like
amongst i mean obviously i think eli is probably
the most experienced well i've probably played
it the most nowadays though you probably play
more than me i didn't play necrons yesterday
though i won 90 to 33 by the way but anyways
i think it's a fair i think that's a fair uh
thing to say but it is Kind of just on your local
game store to set that stuff up. Although, Rob,
you would have some great insight to this, I'm
sure, as a man who plays a game or two. Yeah,
I run an event space. I actually run tournaments.
I'm running a tournament tomorrow. I ran a tournament
last weekend. I run a tournament every weekend,
actually. I played last weekend. Actually, I
am most famous for being a painter. Sorry, but
actually... Everything I create is about how
to play the games. So this is like my thing.
And do that for AOS Old World and now Heresy,
which is cool. Games Workshop don't make any
money from you learning how to play. In fact,
they don't actually even care if you play. yeah
they don't yeah yeah like that's easy if you
don't yeah yeah it's easy if you don't because
then you don't bring up any issues to them um
and so the hot take that they should do it is
great but also we live in a terrible society
where money is the only real factor and if it
doesn't make them money why would they do it
but on the community front of the hobby front
like getting people to play games is actually
super rewarding but not necessarily i mean i
could go into this for probably 12 hours but
like um like we don't pay enough for events as
an example or even to play like you'll be like
i'm gonna play the local hobby store it's five
pounds to book the table for the evening i need
you to know you're just stealing off that person
That's just theft. That's outrageous. I don't
know where you could go in the world nowadays
where you could pay £5 for a tea. A coffee is
£5. A beer is £5. It's more than £5 in London.
£6 .30. I don't know where in the world you could
spend that money. There's actually a really weird
situation where people will spend a lot of money
on a model. like they'll happily buy x amount
or a book or whatever it might be but then to
to play the game they won't spend money or time
or resources to do it which is super weird like
it's really weird i don't really know what the
answer is there i think it's i'm not sure what
the answer is i'm thinking it could also be like
from someone whose gaming circle went from two
people to about six in the last like year or
two it's also quite a bit of a There is a learning
curve because obviously it's not, this is not
just an even, you know, it's not chess. This
is more complicated than a lot, you know, just
normal game. Obviously one of the biggest barriers
entries often with new people is that you often,
again, like, like the commenter said, like it
makes a good point. There's often a bunch of
people who is like, they need someone who's like
willing to train you up in some way or like at
least work it out with you. and it's quite difficult
to find people that are like i get it it's like
it's like it's like the new kid on like the first
day at school or something but then you also
like you don't you've not been there for like
the whole semester or whatever like it does feel
like you're a bit behind But I promise you, a
lot of the time, the intimidation factor is way
worse than the actual thing. I'm sure Rob can
attest to this. People generally are so gassed
to even have someone playing Warhammer with you
that they'll be willing to go and teach you.
I promise you, if one of my friends said, I'm
going to teach you how to play Warhammer, I would
immediately jump out of my seat. Someone to maybe
regularly play this damn game with. In my city,
the local gaming store does learn -to -play days
for certain games. Also, it has a Facebook group.
You can just go on the Facebook group and say,
I've never played a game. I'd like to learn Warhammer.
Would anyone like to teach me? Then someone will
reply and say, yes, I would like to teach you.
Then you just show up at the given time. they
also have a rule book to be fair you can just
read the rule book or watch youtube videos but
it is a lot easier to learn in person like especially
with like i know people often i have a hot take
i probably should have said at the beginning
but like um people's like i know people often
complain a lot about 10th but i promise you from
someone who's had to teach like four or five
people in like this current edition i can't i
would never been able to do that in previous
editions like to the level like you know i didn't
get them up to speed as i have done now it is
again this edition is for newbie players like
so it's obviously not perfect for everybody but
i promise you it's so and even someone who like
plays the game like people who have played it
a lot still get the rules wrong well like you
don't remember all your pieces do like it just
you're not gonna no one's that good at the game
necessarily like all the time like even people
who you literally play like probably like every
week or something they still do silly mistakes
like because it's there's so much going on so
don't feel bad about not being like oh i'm gonna
mess up but it's like it's okay because it's
just a game it's not that serious like it's just
what happened it's fun i have a i have a take
uh i learned warhammer when i was 10 years old
and it was fine i learned from playing with my
other 10 year old friend in the old complicated
editions and it was fine i was a 10 year old
child and i figured it out caveat caveat because
i'm an old man these days i grew up playing the
pokemon trading card game and at my school i
was the only one who knew how to play because
most of the guys i knew would be like Oh, mate,
I got Charizard. That means I win because it's
120 damage. Actually, no, you need fire energy
cards to use that. You need four. I was like,
shut up, nerd. So, like, I understand your point,
but also there is a caveat where some people
are like, like me, I'm trying to play Total Warhammer.
It's not going well. Can you tell? I wasn't good
at the game. Because I can just go and just punch
things. So, like, that's... I guess that's the
dichotomy of a tabletop game like any Warhammer
game. There's density of rules. There's always
a precipice to cover where you have to know this
much to enter. And if it's quite steep, a lot
of people will be like, oh, that's a lot of rules.
Yeah, I think you could always start really small
with Warhammer, though. Like the box sets that
they made. The old box sets that were two factions
fighting. were designed for you to teach yourself
and learn the game and they were like pretty
like i said i was a 10 year old child and we
played assault on black reach and maybe we didn't
do it that well but we still figured it out by
ourselves and we can you just like go up and
up and up from there you don't start with a 2000
point army because back then the game was designed
to play at any points level and be fun but i
don't think it's that the most the most common
question i get asked uh when i because i stream
monday to friday uh about just playing the game
about different game systems most common question
i get asked all the time is like hey what's good
and i'm always like not you like that because
it takes a lot of work and effort uh i was in
i had a really funny moment i was in sweden covering
an event uh like live streaming one of the events
and the swedish guys that flew me over they said
um they said rob what does it take to be good
at warhammer rob uh how do you i can't do it
um they were asking me said what was it what's
it take good to do to be good at warhammer and
i've covered multiple like international world
championships like live stream them and stuff
um and so i feel like i've got a good read on
this and i said well to be good at warhammer
um you just have to read a lot practice a lot
play a lot and try really hard to be great at
warhammer you have to be mentally unwell Like,
just like if you want to be a YouTuber. Hello,
folks. Segway. Family, friends, nada. Like, do
you wake up in the morning and that's all you
think about? Do you go to sleep at night? I know
people who don't sleep because they're thinking
about the match in the morning. That's not okay.
Do you do that? No. Then just relax. Just have
fun with your guys. It's easy. yeah yeah i think
it's harder i think it's might maybe at least
in ninth edition it definitely was this edition
i'd say it's almost harder to be really good
at it than it was before because it's less about
like just making a cool army and like being good
at that and it's more about just doing homework
and knowing like every part of the game and every
mission and every deployment and every stratagem
and etc like when i did really good in my tournaments
ninth edition i had to spend hours Hours and
hours of homework. I couldn't just go out and
practice the game and be good. I had to learn
about all the freaking armies, learn my 20 stratagems,
learn exactly how to play my specific sub -faction
of the game. Oh my gosh. It takes so much time.
They lied to you. You bought a box for £100.
I'm sorry, they lied. That is not easy. Getting
good almost felt more like practicing math than
it did actually practicing a game. whereas back
in the day game of warhammer is like a test like
oh i hope i know what i'm talking about yeah
it was more like a math problem the game feels
a lot more like a math equation now than it ever
has to me could uh could have talked to girls
instead of being you know but Should we go for
the donors, Andy? Yes, we have some donations.
So I'll start us off. DonkeyManUSA for five.
Stream one minute late due to Hal gooning to
his Ahriman Mephiston kitbash. Correct. Okay,
we don't need to see it. We don't need to see
it. Colin, the time is nigh. Alright, yeah, well,
look, it's the... fourth fourth yeah see even
says don't wear a green hat today or you'll be
put down on the street like a dog what jesus
what i give you one last week happy trader day
just for reference to keep you apprised rob uh
this particular viewer has been watching the
show for the last about two months and every
week the title of their their channel is colin
will wear a hat in Eight weeks, seven weeks,
six weeks, and then last week it hit zero and
there was no green hat. So very disappointed
in Colin. And now the reprisal is due. But thank
you for the donation. Tom Warren says, I can't
catch live, but happy Freedom Day, boys. Happy
July 4th for everyone. Happy Canada Day a few
days ago. I was specifically for Colin this one,
I think here. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
I love these messages. Hey, Colin, when are you
going to do the Thancool video? We need the lore
of the greatest of the Skaven. Look, it'll get
here when it gets here. As with every other video
I make, it'll happen when it happens. This one
from Grigorim. I know why. We had 69 viewers
earlier, so they've donated 699. Very nice. Pretty
cool. 69. Oh, one of our Discord members. Chaotic
Noom. Morning, everyone. Each of you will get
a wedding dress sketch snuck in the Discord very
soon. Also, Treezy and Oswen, love you all. I
anticipate the wedding dress sketches. That is
all I can say. Does tree xenos mean unfallen
from endless space who? Could I also have hoop
earrings, please? I like my hoop earrings. I
love hoop earrings and big glasses. Oh, God.
Shalaxy's wettest gripper for two Canadian. That
is a title every time. Five -star person making
dress pics. Can you add yum thigh? Oh, God. Whoa.
oh gosh this is our chat by the way uh rob i
hope you enjoy it donkey man for two bucks the
unhinged howl supercut is 47 minutes going actually
crazy is it actually saying funny things to premiere
it on a lore crimes channel when you're doing
and it's and it's it's transcending to your channel
to law crimes to a it's everything you've ever
said it's it's it's quite impressive to see so
far the dank apostle thank you for the 14 czar
GW needs to renew chaos furries. Yeah. Yeah,
they do. Is that real? Chaos felonies? What?
Is that just a naughty wolf? I don't know. Thanos.
Wow. It's actually Thanos. Amazing. Thank you
for the 15. This money should be going to my
dying son's medical bills. Jokes on him. I've
got my priorities in order. Love you all. Love
you too. Best wishes to your dying son. Hope
that you find the medical bill. I'm sure he'll
understand. As someone who's from Wotan, DKK20,
as someone that's barely played either, AOS is
better than 40k. Now look, I know it's 10th anniversary
day, but I will not let this slander go. Correct.
The game is better. The gateway came in tonight.
I'm pretty sure AOS now is better than 10th edition
from what I've heard. Does anyone even like 10th
edition? Gotta be behind a cash register on the
4th. Can I get a Blessed Sigma? Colin, that's
what they do. Oh, you want me to do the Saltzfire
voice? Yeah. Blessed Sigma. He says, also, hi
Rob, I like your Battletome reviews, and I now
have almost 2 ,000 points of unpainted Soulblight
in brackets. Such is his power. I did one just
before I came on the show. Nice. Class laughter
for 20 bucks. Here is character hot take. Sanguinius
should have been the second most human Primarch
with an arc of struggle with his identity, purpose,
and his own mutation. He should have been a Nietzsche
-type theme that writers can ride. I don't know
if... GW can handle Nietzschean subtext in an
dystopian sense. Oh, no. GW, the guys who called
a Primark burb, burb. I don't know. I don't know
if they can handle it. Iron hand, iron hand of
the iron hand. This seems a little too high IQ
for GW writers, unfortunately. Maybe a fanfic.
Oh, and again. Oh, and another one. Thanks so
much, man. Sanguinius hot take continued. Sanguinius
should have had an adoptive mom instead of a
dad and an adoptive brother who was like Horus
but died on Baal when Sanguinius liberated it.
Respectable. Sangmummius. Wow. Sangmummius. Ooh.
Ooh. Like Gillamum, you know. Thank you for the
220 TRY. Hello, Light. i figured i thought this
was there was a shout out sold drinkers one thing
yeah i don't that gw would release a model in
a box set and just refuse to sell the model as
its own box so real like i was just thinking
about this like obliterators are still stuck
with that spider and gw just let me buy greater
possessed i don't want recast yeah it's so real
i have i seriously obliterators have been in
that box since eighth edition that's like eight
years now it's maybe that is oh my gosh that
is eight years isn't it no not quite not quite
you will buy a combat patrol if you want one
of the models yeah poor fellas uh caleb collins
happy one upping the brits everyone who eu sucks
yeah baby yeah baby oh dear Ash Fox for five
bucks. That time again, quick fire smash or pass.
Centurion smash. Cold Star Battlesuit pass. Wraith
Lord smash. Shadow Sun's Battlesuit smash. Brackets.
She's sat in it. Wow. Crazy message. Thank you.
Is everyone else hearing that in the Dagoth voice
as well? Every time. Narabar. Would you smash
or pass? And last one from Set. happy first of
65 liberties days thanks uk that's okay mini
uk i say mini uk it's like uk 2 .0 you're welcome
right bro bro my home country it's over it's
in the uk like in that that ratio it's like you
could fit it in the uk like a hundred thousand
times as big silly um your country's this big
yeah mine's like um Right, who's doing the next
batch of hot takes? Colin, I do have ones that
are particularly more your vibe. All right, all
right. Next one is by Nach... Nachioville? Nachtville.
Nachtville. Is there repeats here? I feel like...
No, no, never mind. That's just a lot. Yeah.
probably not really a hot take about GW. Games
Workshop is a parasocial cult that sells you
pain in a box. That's real. They aren't a minis
manufacturer. Good lord, there's a lot of big
words here. It's a parasitic empire built on
artificial scarcity, weaponized nostalgia, and
the ritual exploitation of a masochistic fanbase.
It doesn't sell models, it sells penises disguised
as prestige. You should write for 40k. It's not
even halfway. I know! Write less words! They
have developed a system where abuse is part of
the appeal, the prices go up with every release,
the kits get thinner and thinner, and sometimes
I have the feeling the rules updates are just
designed to make your army obsolete before the
paint dries. You were a beastman player, weren't
you? They lure you in with cool new models, then
shift the meta and charge another 200 euros or
local equivalent to stay viable, and we smile
through it all. What makes it worse, they know
exactly what they're doing, and they've convinced
players that suffering, be it financial, emotional,
or logistical, is not only normal but necessary.
We're not buying models, we're buying permission
to be long, and GW makes sure it always hurts.
Good lord. There was a lot of pain in that message.
That was a real message right there. I think
James Workshop punched her in the throat. This
is why you find a couple of friends who want
to just play 6th edition with you and you just
play 6th edition forever and you never worry
about New Warhammer ever again. You play it once
every few months with your brother -in -law because
he doesn't want to play the old games and that's
fine. I assume that it boils down to the issue
is the meta is always changing every two months
or something, isn't it? Because that's what makes
you money. So Old World came out 18 months ago,
and with the exception of the releasing of new
army books, which weren't new, they were addendums,
if that makes sense, editions in the arcane journals.
The meta has had a very evolving... play style
mainly because of two different reasons number
one production matters a real thing so like if
i take a lot of infantry and you can't kill that
you have to build paint and take something that
kills some of my infantry but games workshop
have had basically no input in 18 months of a
game system like outside of releasing some rules
like but not like the continual cycle that i
think a lot of people get upset with for 40k
and age sigma and it has continued to develop
and change because if a bunch of people around
me are all running beastmen and they're gonna
ambush me in the flank well now i'm gonna be
a bit like i'm gonna do something new that's
gonna try and stop that from happening and so
like even the concept that games workshop just
update them uh is not like that's not the factor
there's so many actual factors but it's such
an easy wine button to press to just be like
ah did they change the rule i'm like did you
read it in the first I doubt you read it the
first time. So like you listened to someone on
YouTube say it was good. Then you heard Sim say
it changed it and it's not good. And you made
no decisions on your own and you didn't even
go and meet your friend and play a game. That's
a terrible life to live. Just go play some games.
I have never stopped using Immortal because of
a GW rule change. I think that that's a psyop.
That's a huge psyop. Who cares? If you're good
at the game, you'll make it work. I do agree
to some level that every now and again, they'll
be like, I noticed this model on the web store
was never sold out once, and suddenly it's cracked.
I wonder what inspired this. But that being said,
a lot of the time, it is naturally evolving,
I guess, like you were saying, Rob, where it's
like, well, it's... I was talking about something...
I was talking about something called the production
meta, like Cathay's just come out. There's a
good conversation about balloons are too strong,
which is also really funny. The concept that
balloons might be too strong. Not the balloons.
Here's Archeon, the greatest fighter of chaos.
Also, balloon. They're coming at us slowly and
menacingly. And in a random direction. I've got
a strong guff, and they're going away. But if
you've seen the balloons, it would take you so
long to hobby up five balloons that by the time
you've done that. And the people who bring stuff
like that, generally people don't want to play
with them. I don't think that's true. Five balloons
is a great theme. Like if someone turned up with
five balloons, I'd be pumped. I'd be like, that
looks cool as hell. Like, can I kill that balloon?
It's tougher than a sentinel. That's so wicked.
Wait, what? But people, I mean, not like that.
People who aren't playing for theme, people who
take what's good at the moment, they spam what's
good. They're generally not the kind of people
who you enjoy playing with. I think that's like
0 .1 % of the population. I know it is, but where
I live, it's somehow like 50 % of the people.
They all live here. Whoa. All your friends. I
don't play at my local game store anymore. I
play with just my friend group. It's crazy. The
community in my small city is the worst in the
whole province that I live in. It's super weird.
There's a huge scandal in the Age of Sigmar League
that had a ton of cheating and people trying
to get lists up. It's crazy. There have been
people who have been banned from tournaments
because they're so bad at doing things like this.
So maybe I'm just... Maybe it just hits too close
to home. People like that. That sounds weird.
And I know that should be the minority. In the
city over from us that's bigger than us, it is
the minority. In our 100 ,000 population city,
there's somehow the concentration of people like
this here. It's crazy. If people are particularly
worried about like, oh my god, space marines
are almost like the worst when it comes to horrific
meta changes all the time. if you've been really
really like again like overly concerned about
something like this just pick an army that doesn't
actually have a very large range because it means
like there is no like like for someone who plays
thousand suns my range is like i get it's only
half a range really but i only need to get rubric
marines i have a magnus maybe the terminators
are useful every once in a while but like i always
will bring the same like units like and no matter
what like they'll always be good because the
army is so small so people playing if you're
playing space marines like it's almost like you're
always on catch up because then the new models
come out and then oh you know they're pretty
good and then oh my god the meta change and then
turns out stern guard uh which were terrible
beginning attend are now really good it's like
it's just it also just depends on your community
i feel like like if if your whole community is
super competitive and cutthroat then like, yeah,
these meta changes will matter and you might
start losing every game. But if you're just playing
with like some friends, it's not going to be
the end of the world. Canadians. I just like
to say that as someone who operates specifically
at the very spear tip of competitive gaming,
at least two game systems, they're the nicest
people you can play like hands down because they
don't have, they lose enough or play enough that
like a game, they only want to play a fair game.
And sure. there is a small percentage of people
that are an issue but that's only a small percentage
of people but like my advocacy for those people
is always they're the nicest people i just a
moment ago it was cleaning the venue for an event
the weekend three of them are playing tomorrow
help me like hoover and mop the floor tomorrow
if there's someone who's new they'll teach them
how to play they're the nicest people like so
like it's a bit of a misnomer that like like
that the people who are very competitive are
the worst. They're actually the nicest. And you
only really have... I live in Nottingham. I never
go to Warhammer World to play because it's only
full of weird freaks who emerge from their basement.
And they're like, I'm playing at Warhammer World!
And I'm like, can you be a human being? Like
two weeks ago. Wow. Tournament players I've had
the best experience with. Personally. But then
when... the local stores running like a league
or something like an ongoing thing. That's where
all the awful, terrible people come out and they're
bringing, and they're, these are the people who
pull up with the six Catan shards. And if you
pull up to a game, you can always just say you
win. I don't want to play this game and then
go do something that you'll actually have fun
with. Like. If people aren't there to also have
fun playing the game, don't give them your time.
No one can legally make you play a game of Warhammer.
Just go home. I like what Rob was saying about
Old World, and I think that that would be nice
in 40k. Because I know in Old World, the meta
doesn't drastically change from GW decisions.
I know when FAQ just recently came out. But the
meta should change just with how your local people
play the game. And, like, with random community
people figuring stuff out, it shouldn't change
with GW messing with your models and the rule
set every two months. Because in 40k, it is an
obvious just, like, money scheme and cash grab.
Let's get a shout -out to the 75 % Zeech Demon
win rate back in 8th edition and stuff like that.
But at the end of the day, that 75 % Zeech win
rate never actually affected me. I never played
Zeech against a Zeech army. So it's really about
perspective, I guess. The local meta should be
what drives it. Main takeaway from Rob is that
if you go to Warhammer World, expect to see some
mutated creatures who profess to be good at tabletop.
But also, shout out to the event organizer, Steve.
He's a doll. He has to put up with the worst
things. He has to put up with the worst people
imaginable. Oh, no. The next one there, Colin,
did you see that one by Such a fantastic name.
Swift Paints? No, Thugless. Thugless El Bosso,
that's right. Amazing name. Vehicles suck post
-8th edition, which I don't know if it's a hot
take or not, but dang it, it just turns units
with their own types of movement and firing solutions
into regular units but big, and you might as
well not have vehicles in your war game. That's
a little drastic. It's a little drastic at the
end. Also stop playing regular 40K because playing
against Marines for the 15th time in a row gets
tiring after a while, at least to me. Oh, Eli,
you're really going to like this next one. As
for a final take, custodians should not be their
own army. Yeah, baby. They should add most of
the auxiliary units to any Imperial armies, but
because GW doesn't know how to make that a thing.
They just had to give us another flavor of Space
Marines. Custodies and Knights should not be
a freaking army. They should be allies only.
Ah, but you see, those super -duper Space Marines
are so much better than the super -space Marines
and not redundant at all. Oh my gosh. So real.
That's a pretty real comment. I still think vehicles
have a place, but... Flyers could use some help.
Yeah, flyers are so hard to balance. Yeah. But
I do agree. In bolt action, the World War II
game, it's like random experimental super old
rules, but how they do it is your flyer comes
in, does a strafing run, and shoots at somebody,
and then goes back into reserves for a turn,
and then the turn after that comes in again and
only stays on the table for one turn and then
leaves. I think that's kind of cool and pretty
realistic. flyers are hard to balance i think
that gw's hates them anyway don't they like they
always make them kind of dogs well they were
like this big thing in seventh edition and then
my friend brought like six flyers against me
and it was so awful and it's like why are we
even playing this game like i i hit all of your
models on six plus it's like ridiculous but i
don't have a point with the vehicles thing because
particularly in tenth it is a lot like it is
very vehicle heavy in a lot of places and like
particularly if someone's like new there's like
you don't necessarily have a lot of anti -vehicle
like you don't have all the right units that
are like equipped for that so like a lot of time
it just feels like you're playing into like just
a massive brick of people and you like it like
it's like you know but you can't like enjoy the
game to its full because it's basically just
you being slowly shot off the board the entire
game That was also, like, that was still kind
of a problem back in the day, too. I think vehicles
should be, like, HQs. Limitations, because there
was detachment. There was a combined arms detachment.
There's a thing of, like, you can't bring a certain
number of too many units of the same variety.
There should be a thing of, like, you can't bring
more than a set amount of vehicles unless there's
a certain detachment. That's pretty much what
it was like before 8th edition. That's old rule,
baby. It depends on what army you played, though.
But realistically, back in the day, your good,
strong, tough vehicles were heavy supports, and
you could have a maximum of three heavy supports.
And then 7th edition made formations and ruined
the game for everyone. But before that, there
was limitations. To make you happy, Eli, should
we make a new army that's just Imperial Knights
and Custodians? That would solve the problem.
Combat patrol bird in hell. I do miss armor values.
I do miss armor facing values. I kind of miss
the damage table. Yeah, I know. There are 14
stats on just a data sheet alone. I do want to
play Heresy. The problem is I mostly have Xenos
armies and I don't always like playing Space
Marines again and again and again. You could
play Serial Auxilia, Admech, Militia. True. And
I found fan rules for Eldar. And I've also heard
that they updated the vehicle damage charts,
that it's not, like, soul -crushing anymore.
But they still kept armor values. It sounds like
a really great game. It sounds like they just
made what 40k should have been. Yeah, they added
a mini -game sub -phase to just duels. Like,
potentially, you might get into a normal game
and then have to do a 45 -minute duel. It's completely
unrealistic. Like, it's insane. To be fair, that's
how some of the books go. To be fair, it's like,
oh, here's, like, some, oh, they went forward,
and then, like, oh, and then Saul Tarvis and
Lucius had a fight. Yeah. I want to play 30k.
I should. It just sounds like they fixed everything
wrong about 7th edition and made the game good.
Desiring. Bro's feeling it. uh should we do one
from um eli here do you see the one which is
um by uh just two below it's called funny random
name literally funny random name uh my tabletop
hot take the guard combat patrols utter dog doo
-doo yes that's correct because every combat
patrol now was utter dog doo -doo the guard is
known for three things tanks human waves and
artillery so why in the actual kentucky fried
foot does it contain mostly horses and like 15
guard At least with the last one, it has some
guard. But this is, mom, can we get Death Riders?
No, we have Death Riders at home. Death Riders
at home. It's because they weren't selling enough
horsies, so they needed to put them in there.
It's for being realistic. And also Combat Patrols
mostly all suck now. The Elder one is almost
passable. It's a shame because Ages Sigma has
obviously Spearhead. And that looks like such
a better take on how they make you know but like
combat combat patrols were good one year ago
two years ago whenever they were fine they were
a great deal and now they suck the imperial guard
one is like 300 points i'm pretty sure it's abysmal
start collecting was great yeah combat and they
were before that they were uh battle forces like
god i need to play spearhead though like i need
to play spearhead just so i can get a good general
it's good i never like i'm worried like is that
thing of like once you've tasted like the certain
meal now every other meal tastes bad or something
like now i know how good that is i'm like oh
no all these models i have and they're all useless
because i want to play spearhead we got cookie
yes crumb in the chat the old gsc combat patrol
made the army actually affordable that one and
the sisters of battle and the drukari combat
patrols might be the best deals gw has ever made
in ever history Grey Knights as well. The old
Grey Knight one, which just got murdered. But
the old Grey Knight one had Dread Knight, it
had five strike squad, which could also be pure,
because obviously half the Grey Knight army can
convert into the other half of the Grey Knight
army. That could be purifiers, and then five
Terminators, and then that might have been it.
But man, I think three boxes of that is a 2 ,000
point army. Or even more than 2 ,000 points.
That's crazy. You could basically have a whole
army for like... And if you go to a discount
store, you could basically have a whole army
for like £250. Yeah. I have a hot take related
semi to the Grey Knight Combat, the old one.
I think the baby carrier is a great model. Hey,
so real! He's so real for that! He's so real!
I'm gonna go further with that. The old Grey
Knight models are the coolest models. Some of
the coolest models in Warhammer 40k. I don't
care if they're small. I don't care if they're
smaller than Primera Space Marines. They're really
cool, and they deserve to be loved. The legs
look jacked. The legs look jacked in real life.
I don't care. What's wrong with the pointy helmets?
No, I like them. Hal hates short people, confirmed.
He's classist. He's racist. He hates short people.
If you have weird knees, he hates you too. Weird
knees? Who has weird knees? Do they bend the
other way? Al hates the saying Healy. One last
one, Eli, which is from the one just below the
one you did. It's by Goldjaw. Shout out to this
guy with the... dftdg avatar primaris units have
broken the design philosophy of the imperium
of man in old editions imperium has a set design
philosophy simple robust strong this is shown
in their ships being massive cathedrals that
are modular and have pieces added on over the
years this is how artificer armor works a baseline
armor with slight alterations over centuries
primaris marines they have each of a they each
have a specialization and weapon profile that
is unique to itself That's Eldar design. This
leads to massive bloat that could have been avoided
with tactical squads. This leads into another
rant about how the Drukhari Codex is the best
codex size. Yeah, that's pretty real. I hate
Primaris Marines. I've accepted them, but I never
liked them. And each squad, each having 10 squads
and their entire gimmick is we all have one type
of weapon is very, very... Annoying. I don't
like it. I find it very lame. We have Devastator
squads for a reason. The Codex Astartes has already
laid this all out for us. We have Devastator
squads. We have Assault squads. You can give
your Tactical Marines a few extra special weapons
so that they can do some special jobs. You don't
need a Flamer unit, a Laz Cannon unit, a Rocket
Launcher unit. It's just ridiculous. I just hate
it. But they got cool armor. I like him. I can
ask you a question relating to Primaris Marines
as a not more YouTuber. So my hot take is that
I think Games Workshop are pretty audacious to
content strike people when they're the biggest
IP thieves we've ever seen in gaming. So that's
my question to the panel. Are they the biggest
IP thieves in gaming? Yes. They gotta be. they
have to be like surely i can't think of anyone
else it's just star wars one right like they
find a clone army on the moon on genesis and
then uh and then thingy is whatever his name
is is just the guy that makes the clones so yeah
wow that's pretty real i mean like that the entirety
of warhammer history half of it is just dune
lore like And real life, like, oh, Lionel Johnson.
Where'd you get that from, fellas? Definitely
not an English poet. Definitely not a guy. I
don't think they shy away from it. Who's Edgar
Allan Poe? Never heard of him. What is a Judge
Dredd? Or my favorite recent video that I did
was Alexandros the Great, who is a canon character
now. Yeah. For the Sons of Throne chapter. It
is truly ironic, though, that they cracked down
so hard on these fan people. Well, it was when
they had a go at the Battletech. There was a
Battletech channel who was doing merch, and one
of the designs of Battletech war machines is
called a Warhammer, so they got struck with a
copyright notice saying, it's not even the same
IP! It's just called a Warhammer! You also don't
own the concept of a hammer that kills people
in war. Robert Baratheon is seething. But yeah.
it's it's pretty ironic they're pretty as much
like is it unique that I guess that's the question
it boils down to is like again like the analogy
we used earlier is all the ingredients you know
did you basically make a new dish when you put
the ingredients of so many other things together
in one thing I mean like who owns the IP to vampires
I don't know who kind of word for that werewolves
like who would own that in some way and it's
like i it's different because like from obviously
like a design and like you know like the macro
warhammer is basically it is everything it's
everything else but then obviously like when
we you guys do like law stuff we're reading things
where like someone has written an original story
throughout the and maybe they use inspiration
from other things but like it's difficult because
again on the law side of it they're pretty good
at it the model side of it is like wow could
i get my greco -roman inspired space marine please
oh wait and all the other you know yeah it's
very i don't know i don't know i don't feel like
it's It's not blatant, but it's also, like, I
don't know if they have much of a high horse
to be on, do you know what I mean? I don't think
they're even that good at the lore side of it.
Because everything nowadays is just a continuation
of, like, you know, 30 -year -old things, which,
yeah, they've filed the serial numbers off by
this point, but, like, the Arbites are still
just Judge Dredd. Like... Was I the only one
who did a bit of an eye roll when we were back
at Armageddon again, though? That was my thing.
I was just like, Armageddon? Can I tell you a
quick story about this? I used to work for Games
Workshop. I was the live stream presenter. And
I would interview different people every week.
And I had on an author. I won't say who. uh because
that's not fair um and i before the show was
like i'm gonna ask you a load of questions it's
great i was like okay so then and i had carte
blanche no one i had no oversight fyi it was
a crazy time uh i launched like the whole of
like eighth edition just off the top of my own
head i was like this is what we're doing um anyway
so i've interviewed this author and i asked a
question i said hey it would be super cool if
you could tell me other books you know other
sci -fi series or well it's kind of narrowing
it down a bit uh but you know things that you
may have read that influence you or that you
know you really like outside of warhammer and
they were like no no i've only read warhammer
and i was like hey it's really okay like we're
allowed to talk about the fact that you have
other things it'll make it will humanize you
to the audience you know and he's like no i've
actually only read warhammer and i was like i'm
not an author And I've read more books than you've
read. And that was, I still think about that
today. Just the confidence on his face, the smile.
He's like, no, I've only read Warhammer. I was
like, ah, that's terrible. That is crazy. That's
unbelievable. It's like, oh, I'm a movie director.
Outside of the Marvel universe with your new
film, what have you, no, I've only watched Marvel.
I hope that's like a contractual thing and that's
not that he was lying. No, no, because it was,
like I say, it was very freeform. Unless he was
genuinely terrified that a manager would watch
and be like, oh no, you said you read A &M Banks,
you're a monster. To be fair, Rob, were you in
a room with one -sided glass with a guy from
GW sharpening a knife on the other side? Was
that the environment? I was just in the gaming
hall, actually. Just on a comfy chair. really
weird like a view of like writing then if you've
only read it from like a warhammer you know what
that would make so much sense if that would that
would make so much sense for warhammer novels
honestly like oh my god that was only that author
yeah yeah is he pretty is he still there yeah
for sure I can guess who that is. I'll try to
narrow it down. I'll tell you after. If it is
who I think it is, I'm actually going to lose
it. You're going to watch Dune and go, wait a
minute, this ripped off Warhammer. But then again,
there's like one of my favorite authors is James
Swallow. And like, I know he's done stuff for
like Star Trek and all sorts. And it's like,
sometimes you'll watch, like you go on Amazon,
you'll buy like an audio book or a... kindle
book that i get and i'll be like oh he did this
series as well or this franchise that's interesting
just like the idea is like nope just one i mean
it is crazy that even the greatest of them dan
abner was able to put a yugioh card game in the
final fight between horace and him and i'm not
even joking like there's a literal point Their
battle shatters across dimensions and time to
the point in which, like, one of them is, like,
they're arguing. One of them is, like, they're
literally ripping each other apart. Another one
is, like, they're literally playing a card game.
So, like, that's how, like, it just breaks the
universe to that level. So you're basically,
for people who haven't read the book, it's like,
oh, Horus is going, I'm going to gut you, Emperor.
I'm going to kill you. And then the Emperor goes,
rook to king four. Oh, okay. I don't really remember
much of the third book, to be honest, because
so much of it was just like describing a fight.
And I think there's something to be said about
like some books I've read for Warhammer are like,
oh, nothing happens in this book at all. And
other ones where it goes because it goes into
too much minutia of like, and the chair was made
of this. Like, I don't care. And then there's
other ones where it's just like, oh, this happened
and this happened and this happened and this
happened. And then there's too much going on.
Well, yeah, I mean, it's again, Warhammer is
a it's an it's a living, breathing. universe
it's not it's not a story arc necessarily it's
a ongoing war and you know we've not you know
i don't think they've written you know they're
not written the war's end really like it's a
it is only war there is no end to the war the
war part two is only part two or part infinity
of the war in fact your break took a tea break
and then continued the war like it doesn't really
I love it again. Space Marines went to this corner
and they battled that faction and then they just
about won with someone making a great sacrifice
at the end. I don't care much for that. And to
be fair, they got a lot of mileage out of 999
.M41. There was a lot going on in that one year.
We're going to do a lot of stuff. Oh, M .212.
Just to back it up, it's very hard to... Can
anyone here think of any franchise or any other
thing they've seen recently where it almost feels
totally original? Yeah, see what I mean? Well,
yeah. I'm not asking for total originality. I'm
asking for fundamental organizations of your
setting to not be Dune. They literally say it
is inspired by that. I know they're not there
anymore, but they literally said it is that.
This is a setting to sell models. That's what
they said about it. I don't mind inspiration,
but I can say this character I drew is inspired
by Halo. If it's just the Master Chief with a
Space Marine helmet on, I've not inspired anything.
I still remember Cliff Brzezinski from Gears
of War fame being like, I think we're the first
people to put a chainsaw on a gun. And I'm looking
over to Warhammer like, you sure about that?
You sure about that? Elder Scrolls is pretty
original. Even if a lot of that is Michael Kirkwright's
insane ramblings. Have you played Expedition
33 yet? I've not. Blowing reviews. So good. It's
French, so that's pretty original because I may
be listening to a French thing and I normally
hate that. I think... The only thing I can think
of is Brandon Sanderson's work on Stormlight
Archive or... Oh my god, what's the other one?
i'm blanking oh my god uh miss born yeah or things
like that like that feels original to like some
uh like a pretty you know as in like it's taken
the same ingredients but it's definitely feels
like its own uh thing which i think the endless
universe feels pretty original to me well it's
like like lord of the rings right like tolkien
said he there's a ton of inspiration from like
norse mythology stuff like that but you wouldn't
read norse mythology and go Lord of the Rings
go, yeah, this is just Norse mythology. You'd
be insane. The Navigators don't even get to the
name change bit. They're just Navigators. It's
the same thing. And they still haven't changed
that name. Yeah, they're just the Navigators.
That's great. I wonder if the people who own
Frank Herbert's estate, they were like, we could
sue. We could get a few things. We should do
the next one there, though. Is there any more
donors in between, maybe? We could do some donations.
We've got one from Caleb Collin for two. Elfsimp,
what's your fave copium? Also favorite VTuber.
I think that's directed towards you, Collin.
They asked a question about elves and VTubers.
I know where that one's directed. I don't know.
My favorite copium is that the elder are always
like the top three competitive armies that keeps
me going. That keeps, that keeps me by every,
every, it happens. And I say to myself, yes,
any day now they're going to see these numbers
and they're not just going to nerf them. There's
going to be a book. There's going to be a release.
There's going to be something cool. Don't worry,
Colin. There's a course ad book coming on. It'll
be fine. I don't really have a favorite VTuber.
I like a couple different ones. I don't actually
watch them that much, to be honest. I just bring
it up because it's funny. I watch a few, but
I'm not... I don't watch too many live streams.
They all just live stream. William Knight for
$4 .99. Thanks for the feet to your list. Turns
out I don't have a foot fetish. I was promised
a green hat, Colin. No happy birthday for you.
Also, Rob, this particular viewer has been congratulating
Colin on his birthday every stream for the last
three months. Oh, nice. My birthday was in January
for reference. Who did the feet tier list? I
suggested it from the people's comments, to be
fair. I'll own it. Because I did one. I was just
wondering if I was the only one. I rated all
the best feet in Age of Sigmar. Nice. We did
Warhammer in the round. Oh, nice. It's fun. I
have to update it. They've released a lot of
feet recently. What a beautiful sentence. with
genuine, like, genuine excitement. I have to
do that. It genuinely has to happen. Oh, okay,
I'm not reading this one out. Bruh, this is Colin.
Nah, let me take this bad one. Wait, what? This
is... Oh, just the name is what you're freaking
out. I was like, where's the bad bit? But no,
it's from Marathi's designated toilet. Thank
you. So real. He used to be Shark Bore and Mirror.
What happened? Well, he saw the light. On my
way to Bretonnia, wish me luck, boys. Also, happy
birthday, Colin. Yeah, I still got it. Well,
I get the Skaven plushie. I kind of forgot that
was a thing. I don't know. I might get the Rat
plushie. Why not? Shall I? He's wet as gripper
for two Canadian. There's a six or seven Catan
Rest Destroyers prick. XOXO. Wow. Do not play
that. Thank you for the $4 .99. Project for the
boys. Make the lore crime server as an army system.
As an army, any system will do with any addition.
Oh, make the lore crime server as an army. Any
system will do with any addition. Interesting.
Interesting. The whole lore crimes codex. Hmm.
Hollow network host for 10. Hot take. The Eldar
should not be... guard height and be the middle
between marine and human uh slowly are the elder
armor all the same their ways of where war are
so different they should be different like the
reapers it's basically they should be distinctly
different from the guard and the space marines
and stuff rather than just like we shoot shurikens
rather than bullets i mean they are they have
some distinction at least but yeah you you have
a point the armor should all be quite drastically
different isn't it It kind of is. It's different
enough for me, personally. Yeah. I guess that's
a personal taste thing. Grungrivaldi Gurnison
for five bucks. Good name. Nagash is all, and
all are one in Nagash. Purge the soul thief.
Purge the soul thief. Sigma. That's so real.
So real. Black coach. Mog's Archeon. I'm so glad
you shared that information with me, Rob. Such
a good model, too. Wait. Oh, no. This is horrid.
This is a funny one. I'll do it for the people,
though. For the people. I'll wear a green hat
this week. Five euros. For Hal, I love eating
poop. It's delicious. I want it in my tummy.
Document USA, cut that sample out for context.
for the unhinged how complation thanks man wow
for the people they're setting you up they're
setting you up and dad bod nap god five feel
well space dreams makes more sense than excluding
half the recruiting pool i guess the master of
mankind is dumb well he's a he's a bad father
we know that for sure uh and that's coming from
me the guy who's always making excuses for the
emperor Or do you? And therefore you're a terrible
father. I just give advice to other parents and
I'm like, I have no credentials, but you should
do this. And they're like, who are you? Yeah,
that's fine. What are you talking about? I can't
wait for them to make Lady Space Marines. I'm
going to kick my tootsies up. I'm going to book
a day off. i'm gonna i'm gonna get myself in
a bathrobe and i'm gonna go on facebook for the
first time in two years hello boys i see i would
what i said earlier i look i'm gonna get yelled
at i cannot put into words how little i care
either way whichever direction it goes I'm going
to sit there. I'm going to watch for wait for
the official decision and it's going to enter
my brain. And then I will go back to coping about
the Eldar. Yeah. It's a good life when you don't
care about Imperial things. Oh, it's beautiful.
Warhammer is already so scuffed. It wouldn't
even matter at this point. Lady Orcs though.
Big green lady. Oh, that's another place. That's
another place. Blood Bowl reigns supreme. Exactly.
Orc cheerleader. Orc babe. That's what you mean.
I still like Space Marines. Space Marines are
cool, but Xenos are cooler. But I like my warrior
monks. I would like them to stay that way. And
I love the Sisters of Battle. I think the Space
Marines and Sisters of Battle should both remain.
I think we need more Sisters of Silence lore
because they're really cool and they don't do
anything with them. Anyway, should I read out
another hot take? I've got one from the Beast.
Mr. Beast. Not Mr. Beast. DJ Beast. That would
be cringe. Like many have said, the prices are
horrendous. A more personal issue is nobody playing
any of the smaller scale Warhammer games in my
city. I have the forces for a spearhead. but
with nobody to play against. My Skaven are just
hanging around. Same for if I want to spend and
get a box of Kill Team. With no use for my Skaven,
I've had to default to just using them for TTRPG
games I run. Bonus take. They need to make paint
taste better than pouring it on my food and it
tastes like shit. Nuln Oil. It's an acquired
taste, okay? Where did the Nuln Oil meme come
from? Having a sophisticated palate? Mongoloid.
Like, where did it come from? Who's been munching
the Nuln oil? The thing is, I saw something recently
where it was someone talking about... I saw something
recently where it was just like people paint
and they lick the brush. Maybe it was Peachy.
They lick the brushes because it's like a kind
of way to gauge how much water's in the brush
or something. And I was just like, I really want
to do a painting challenge. between like louise
and peachy and be like all right you have this
much time to paint this mini every time you lick
your brush you lose a point and just see how
like that like muscle memory in them like comes
and they go just like because i think it's it's
you shouldn't lick your brush you should keep
it in your board we're literally eating plastic
paint like this is it is on here we have enough
microplastics in our system as it is i need eating
the paint is not helping No, no. Look, plastic
takes thousands of years to dissolve in the ocean,
right? That means I'll be immortal. That's how
it works. I don't know. The paint -licking side
of it, I just... I don't know. I don't think
that's our biggest concern. One of the things
that happens is every Monday I do a show where
I look at the event results from tournaments
that have happened around the world. And if ever
the results don't seem right, I'm like, hmm,
I don't think they should be winning. That's
weird. I always, and it's normally the US, I
normally then Google the lead content of the
water in that region. There's quite a correlation.
I just bring it up live on screen. I'm like,
in Ohio. Then I close the tab. Buy a nice water
filter if you live in America. I think paint
is the least of our worries. Probably better
for you than American water at this point. Why
do the Tyranids have a 100 % win rate in Flint,
Michigan? brother in crime do you have another
one on the list or yeah uh there's one from pyro
my hot take nerf necrons i hate necrons not in
lore they're one of my favorites there are they
probably somewhat balanced and i simply am bad
at fighting them probably do i care no it's real
it's real their combat patrol makes me want to
cry because their doomstalker and overlord have
plus four invulnerability save is pain and that
Doomstalker can do crazy damage. I love having
my general turn one obliterated, because the
funny Doomstalker decided no more synapse. Shadow
in the warp for me, or fun for me. In normal
games, they are also pain. Hyper Crypt Legion
makes me weep. Stop teleporting! Your unit's
every five seconds, and let me fight you, goddammit!
Also, the monolith is insane, because any time
I... anything near that thing gets atomized.
I'm happy that thing is $149. It punishes people
for using it. Also, Catan shards are pain. Why
can't they just do half all the damage and take
an addition to very strong abilities? Who thought
of that? I wish whenever I come up with a fun
army list, my first question isn't, how do I
handle Necrons? If that is the first thing that
comes to my mind, maybe they need a nerf. Is
this probably a skill issue of my end? I wouldn't
be surprised, but I need... to vent. That was
a fun story. I think it sounds like you need
to have friends who play more armies than one.
It sounds like you play Necrons way too much.
I have a friend who plays Tyranids and Necrons.
When he plays his Tyranids, it's like 50 -50
if either one of us will win. If he's playing
his Necrons, it's guaranteed that he's going
to win because my shit gets sent to the nether
realm because he has two huge cannons that sit
at the back of the field and a katana shot and
it just like it just it's just death honestly
like you can win in other ways but in terms of
just straight up shooting like i don't know what
even comes close to just i mean it rocks my world
every time have you tried getting good I mean,
I win. It feels crazy strong every time I use
it. Also, every time I play against Custodes,
I lose, and it's an awful experience. I feel
like Necrons aren't so bad. What you should do
is every time you lose a match against an army
in some way, is make a video about how they suck
and their lore is bad and they're dumb. so people
will know the good word. I've never done that,
of course. I would never do that. Colin does
the most prized content, such as the 10 -hour
Carl Franz Summon the Elector Count video. Classic
video. It was one hour. Oh, still. It felt like
10. But it was a good meme. last two here that
we'll wrap up on just obviously we're gonna hold
everyone hostage here for hours but we do appreciate
everyone for giving so many of these like amazing
comments they are uh really really appreciated
guys and we did obviously there are quite a few
of them that were similarish in terms like most
people's complaints were like expensive but we
you know we feel that we feel that There's wonderful
websites based in China that have very affordable
Warhammer models. You shouldn't be mentioning
it because that's what they get on top of. He's
not endorsing it. He's just saying that they're
there. Isn't that interesting? There's a website
called War Table Games that exists. Well, now
he's saying it. Anyway. Oh, no. I'm not endorsing
anything. There's one by literally, there's a
comment here by Hal's alter count, which is really
not a sure thing, buddy. Bad experience. I am.
In some ways, the anti -Colin. Just as he hates
Khorne and Bretonnians because of playing against
them, so I hate the knife ears. Back when I first
discovered Rogue Trader, the only people who
also played near me were the biggest, cheatiest,
and entitled bastards you could find. The very
embodiments of that guy. And they all played
knife ears. Brackets, I was a boring marine player
at first. I deserve fate. Never mind. All sympathy
is gone. In addition to the standard underhanded
tactics, see Auspex tactics video, brackets,
they are also whiny hypocrites. For example,
when the Eldar first got Aspect Warriors and
the freaking Avatar, brackets, back before the
joke, Marines got plus one toughness and they
threw endless tantrums about Marines favoritism
because of it. Brackets, this is pre -Ward, was
he pre -Matt Ward? So Marines were the Avatar
who later became. He still works there. Really?
Yeah, he came back. He writes loads of stuff.
They just don't put his name on it. He did like
the 8th edition Gathering Storm books and loads
of stuff. And that's not out of like... They
just don't credit people anymore. It wasn't them
being nice. It's like, he does loads of stuff.
He's a nice guy. I didn't know that. He's my
goat. I love Matt Ward. Get him on next time.
And it goes on apparently. Oh, and speaking of
that burning douche, they also claim that laser
weapons count as heat weapons. So it's immune
to them as well because physics. Yes, they killed
cat girls. As I said, they were all that guys.
It's also not just Warhammer. Knife ears were
the normal go -to choice for the cheating power
playing douche in practically every game I've
played. So yeah, well, I hate knife ears as much
as Colin hates corn in the French. Wow. Crazy.
Wow. Eldar have a track record of being very
OP on the table. Yeah. But they have no lore
that is good. So just let it, just let us know.
All I can say is I did a video a day on Eldar
lore for a month. Did anyone watch it? No, but
it's there if you want to watch it. All of the
Eldar fans did watch it, Andy. Yeah, all 10 of
them. It was great. All fans docking together.
Last one here by Grail Mike. Hashtag screw Aberrash.
Hot take. I think GW hasn't made the tabletop
bad enough. I think they should make some of
the minis horrible and some of the minis beautiful
while being released at the same date and in
the same army, I think. rules should be so broken
brackets only Bretonnia and Space Marines but
they physically can't lose and some should be
so bad that eating your opponent's minis will
be less painful I think all GW minis should be
at a minimum 100 US dollars I think that should
be a rule that if you paint your mini too well
that you can't shower I'm a law guy mandatory
Brittonia reference. Wow. Thanks, Mike. Really
a hero. Yeah, that's awesome. Does anyone have
a proper mini that they think is really ugly
in the current ranges that people see? Do you
think he's ugly as a mini? I have some Vespid.
Some old OG Vespid. They're ugly, but I love
them. I think they're an amazing model. I kind
of hate Chaos Spawn at the moment. One of them
has a cool face. The other one looks goofy. The
Chaos Spawn is severely outdated. My internet
just dropped. I'm still here. Don't worry. Don't
worry, Colin. We got you. Everything started
loading for me for a second and no one was talking.
I was very confused. Yeah, I just think the Chaos
Spawn model and the fact they made Chaos Spawn
kind of good at the moment in basically so many
armies. Why? Everyone's just running around with
these ugly models in the moment and not in a
cool way. Mine is the wood elf beast pack you
can buy for the old world because it is wild
animals that I could, I can go to like, well,
I guess, you know, remember the fallen toys are
us, but I can go to Walmart, buy something the
same size and slap it on a base. It's a good
kit. That's a good kit. I appreciate the classics
are available. I always think these old models
should be in some way available to get, but...
It's terrible. Have you seen the Mounted Yeoman?
Oh, yeah. You know it's bad when there's a chuckle
that goes afterwards. Then, you know, it's like,
oh, we all know. There's a lot of ugly Lord of
the Rings models as well. I have a lot of ugly
Lord of the Rings models, but they have charm.
Is it the old Alariel, which looks like the 80s
dress, and the butterfly wings? You should see
the old Marathi model. Gee! Just checked, by
the way, $79 for the mountain human. I love the
30 -year -old models for a new... It's so crazy.
I mean, that's a crime, probably, in three states.
It's that ugly. although I think if I might wrap
up with like any more donos there Andy I think
that's all we got oh perfect then I think though
again everyone thank you guys so much for all
your all the comments who you know everyone who
basically gave all the things in discord really
appreciate it obviously if you wish to be featured
in previous previous upcoming episodes Join the
Discord. Literally, we will be reading your things.
We will be reacting to memes that make fun of
us every single day. And propping our faces onto
many different characters. You make quite a few
of those. It's hard for us to not see them. Maybe
we will see the fourth pregnant Colin meme. We
will see. There are four iterations of a pregnant
drawing of Colin. Yeah, I keep getting drawn
pregnant. I don't... I don't get it, but I also
can't stop anyone. It's modern art. Is it? It's
modern. Life finds a way. So does creativity.
Don't Jeff Goldblum my pregnancy art. Don't do
that. Don't say that. I was going to say, I think
you were about to beat me to it though. Thank
you very much, Rob, for joining us today. I really
appreciate it. And I feel very honored. So thanks
very much. You've all been wonderful to spend
time with. It's a bit of a silly pod to say the
least. It's a bit scattershot and a bit all over
the place, especially an episode like this. But
before we do wrap it up, yeah, slightly. Did
you want to like mention any of the things you
were, I know you've got the new channel, the
honest heresy. Is there anything else that you
wanted to mention? Yeah. Yeah, that's cool. Go
check that out if you want. That's fine. Or don't.
I don't care. No one else is going to read the
Heresy rulebook. It's just me. As we proved earlier,
no one wants to read a rulebook. I must ask my
question. Yes. The most important question that
I ask every guest. What's your favorite Call
of Duty Zombies map? Oh, I... not played call
of duty we haven't got a good answer for this
sounds like six guests oh my gosh sorry it's
all right i have another attribute to oh no as
well all right okay rob god damn it oh my gosh
i already know this is you get it's a would you
rather kind of thing but okay you get the ability
to do a double jump. So one jump, and then like
Mario, in midair, you get a double jump. But
every time you do the second jump, you shit yourself.
Yeah. I mean, yeah, absolutely, no question.
Why would you not take the deal? DK was the only
one who said no to that. Why wouldn't you? How
often do you need the double jump? Yeah, I don't
often need to double jump. But I do often...
But I do often shit myself, so I'm only really
gaining in this situation. If you get hit by
a truck, a double jump where you shit yourself
is a better alternative than flat. No, all I'm
seeing here is a future where I'm gaining something.
I've already got the negative stat. I'm just
winning. I didn't really ponder this before,
but if your guts are feeling really bad that
you ate terrible food or something, you literally
could double jump and evacuate. If you're worried
about accuracy, just do it at night, go to a
ditch, and then you won't ass blast all over
your toilet. You can also use it offensively,
right? I see some alright people and I just double
jump over them and shit on their heads. Also,
I like the idea that you could go to the doctor
and you're like, right, you're coming up to that
age now. Gotta have the prostate exam. Please
go to the gymnasium and then we'll be ready for
you. Do you know the... Have you seen the 2003
Clone Wars cartoon made by the same guy who animated
Samurai Jack? Maybe not. I've seen most of it.
It's really good, but in it, General Grievous
is flying all over the place because it's the
most insane fighting choreography. You can just
do what he did. You're just back -flipping mid
-air, except you're shitting all over them. And
then in the live action, they're like, Grievous
is too OP. We need to give him asthma. Okay.
Blade of Shrek music in the chat says Hal just
wants to justify him pooping his pants. Wow.
Absolutely. And on that note. Thank you everyone
for listening, watching. Please subscribe. All
that good stuff you made at the end of the episode.
There's no reward. You endured the terrible would
you rather question. I'm so sorry. Thank you
Rob again for coming along for this somewhat
of a journey. We'll see you guys all in the next
one. Peace. Bye.