Intro
Hello ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, welcome to Law Crimes.
And before we get started, my costume didn't arrive in time,
Colin's didn't arrive in time, so this is what's happened.
Oh my god. Eli, what have you done?
What have you done? Oh my goodness.
Hey guys, Panky's no work here.
Oh my goodness. Welcome everyone. Welcome to Halloween special Law Crimes.
This is a little spooky event, we're talking about ghosts and ghouls and all that good stuff.
Necracy is probably gonna show up. Should we say who we are?
My mind was, I did, you can check back, there was a podcast we did like a month ago,
where I was on my phone ordering a costume from Etsy and I got an NCR Ranger costume.
They said, you get your money back if it doesn't get here before Halloween.
But we're before Halloween technically, so I didn't get it in time, which is a shame.
And I am in the same boat, I ordered a Helldiver costume and it's not here yet.
Amazing. I am Colin.
Yeah, I noticed.
I went all over town looking for a freaking Dragon Ball shirt and a bald cap.
Took me four hours this morning, I had to go to Walmart and there was nothing there.
I had to make a hot topic account to get 10% off. I have an account that's hot.
Oh no.
But you know it was worth it. I got this cool Dragon Ball shirt.
And I'm Colin.
Will you wear it after this, Eli?
Thank you, yeah I will. I'll just turn it into a gym shirt or something.
Two Collins, that's crazy. The bed is one squared.
The actual bed is unneeded in the background.
Let this be the day that you almost got Orham Alor.
This is in fact Captain Jack Boys for the audio listeners out there.
There is real makeup around my eyes, it stings.
Yeah, it was good.
I think you should wear eyeliner more often, it really accentuates your eyes.
It stings so bad.
When I had that makeup on for the entire thing it hurt.
That stuff's bad for your skin.
I was like, my eyes, I want to pick my eyes and like no.
Thank you for the comment of Captain Jack Boys.
I appreciate that.
Wow, DJ Beast.
Same costume as him.
So for everyone today, it's pretty close to Halloween.
Spooky, scary skeletons, all that good stuff.
And today we're going to talk about ghosts or things basically undead in Warhammer adjacent.
Not everything is undead, but we've chosen a selection.
A little selection of cheeky little things that we've all picked out.
I had the pleasure of going first though for people.
If everyone did like our costumes, thanks.
If they didn't keep it to yourself.
Please yell at Etsy to be better with shipping.
Starting off with our little adventure into something a bit more, you know, this thing will make you piss yourself.
This is truly terrifying. This is not chaos, though.
This is Mandrakes, a little horrific creation of the Drukhari.
Almost a dark elves then.
That's not the right setting.
So everyone was already thinking, man, like the Drukhari, the dark Eldar, they already kind of like the scariest, scummiest, like the most terrifying thing in the Warhammer verse.
There's something worse.
That they even they fear and that they avoid, and yet they somehow set up right next to in their own neighborhood.
So Mandrakes themselves are this sort of ebony skin, like glowing, dark Eldar like figure, often with long flowing hair.
And they are utterly terrifying to be around.
They often appear in essentially they will their special ability is somewhat they can appear from your shadow or essentially shadows are their realm.
They're not quite living things.
They're like half intermixed with the real space like in Komarra.
And then half of their soul is like trapped somewhat in the immaterium as well.
They pretty much just like just describing them for someone like visually, you wouldn't really get to see them up close unless you were pretty much either dead or you were essentially caught a little glimpse like their rippling power.
Often, I think in the official artworks is green energy that kind of comes out a little in like carved runes more like their skin.
And what makes them kind of more truly terrifying is the fact that they are pretty much the most efficient killer in in all the like the Drukhari thing is a lot of time, you know, keeping you alive.
But this thing is just it is death incarnate.
They don't even bother going up to fight against.
They are got some new models, though.
So if everyone wants to buy them, they are pretty sick for the Mandrakes themselves.
They actually found a special reason to be around.
For the Mandrakes themselves, they actually found a special region of Komarra.
I can't pronounce this perfectly, but it's called Ali-in-Drakh, I think.
And it's literally like described as like, you know, Chicago, Colin.
Oh, I'm well acquainted.
Well, let's just say it got cut off because it's like it like everyone was like, now we don't we don't mess with that.
I wish we could do that.
Yeah, and sort of opened up like 100 years later and there were people still living in there.
Essentially, there's a whole region of like the massive city of the Drukhari city of Komarra.
That's in its sort of web way.
And it's entirely almost shut off.
And that's where the Mandrakes sort of like they scour and they stalk and they hide within the shadows.
And if a even in fact, the whole vector is thinking, you know, I've got some balls on me and I want to go in there and make a deal.
It's not very likely that you'll survive it, but they are fantastically good killers.
So if someone's willing to bargain the right price or the things that they are tempted by, then they'll very much be like, you know, we'll go for it.
They don't really talk.
There are some of them that I will reference a horror story later in this section, but they don't really communicate because it is my dude is literally a shadow goat of death.
Like what does he need to you know, he doesn't file taxes.
I do think there's a really cool one.
Again, pronunciation is going to be dog, like absolute dog.
Kendor, rock and rock.
End of the group, Drukhara, all portal or the decapitator.
This one has four arms and he essentially just roams Komarra's depths.
And he just he likes to stick up with insulin insulin moment. Don't worry about it.
I wanted to get an insulin pump prop, but I had no idea where to find that.
So this one just essentially just stalks around the streets of Komarra and basically just goes around like decapitating people because he enjoys it.
I should say as well, like if you are in the presence of mandrakes, your bowels loosen, the butthole loosens because these things inspired dread and terror as like a sort of aura effect.
It's like literally seeing them is perhaps the worst thing.
I mean, like it's the equivalent of like seeing the gash in some way, like just being around it.
You have the instinct of like, I'm a scared little weak human and I'm going to die.
They often themselves like mandrakes, they channel like life energies from other things they like with being like creatures like half in the warp and half alive.
They like to steal your life force like that life was away from you.
And it's like there's some abilities they have on tabletop, which is also represented in their law.
One specific one was they channel stolen energies and they just blast it like freezing flames.
Come on, what the tabletop thing is for that as well. But then the thing is this flame is not just like, ah, you know, painful death.
It also burns your literal soul. So it's a complete death.
And most things in Warhammer, which are like the worst thing ever.
It's like if you die, your soul gets ripped apart. You feel your soul also being burned alive.
Pretty much the worst thing ever. Lastly, on mandrakes, there's a really cool.
Well, it's in like it's only we're trying to make Warhammer horror stories and they were actually like giving it a go.
And it's a story about how like an imperial city where it's this noble born daughter who essentially it's called the Oubliot.
If anyone here has no one here has possibly read it, it's the one where this noble daughter, I think her father's just recently passed away.
And she's essentially threatened by other strong houses on the imperial planet.
And they have a little Oubliot, which obviously for the uninitiated is based like a dungeon, like the worst version of a dungeon.
And thanks, brother. Thanks, Tom Warren. Appreciate that.
The guy associated with the guy associated with Innsmouth Riz chooses a costume associated with a scene.
He's not wrong.
I'm all about.
I'm being sent I'm being sent video games where it's like it's animated dating sims of Lovecraftian creatures.
Oh, my life.
What's the song in South Park?
The so in the war, Lord Cthulhu.
And how love South Park is Cartman in that in that in that.
I sound like him.
And in this in this Oubliot, there's discovering like they essentially like thing is like a demon or some weird creature being bound up.
And it turns out to be a mandrake.
And the thing is, with this mandrake, it pretty much makes a deal with the human.
And then it sort of slowly starts to get unleashed.
And then at first it takes out political enemies or it saves her life.
But then eventually this thing just thirsts for death and for life energy to be stolen.
And it goes on an absolute rampage.
And it's like this thing is truly the way it does it in the book.
I honestly can't really do it.
Judge justice.
But if people read about it, this thing is quite well sort of put out.
But like it literally makes the hair on the back of your neck tingle.
And there's obviously this thing just lives in shadow and it's terrifying.
And if anyone else has any other parts they want to add about mandrakes, I think that's most.
Did it cover again?
It's on that awesome tabletop kill team thing now for it's the kill team box set with the nightlords.
So it's in a damn good box set as well.
So they don't want to go pick that up.
Hell, yes.
Some amazing parts in there.
My next choice for some little ghouls that should ghost here was wraith nights.
Paul Colin is not representing the elder today.
Not sorry, guys.
So sorry, brother.
I'll try and do this justice.
I support the sentiment as always.
What else good at, Andy?
Dying.
Don't ask.
Dying.
Only one of the elves in the wraith night is dead.
The other one is alive.
Is that technicality?
Come on.
No.
The problem with the elder society is that what happens if loads of your people die and
if slanesh basically sucks your soul on death, they've managed to somewhat solve this with
the spirit stones, which are these little like, I think they are red, mostly aren't they Colin?
And mostly there's like red ruby colored.
They're ruby colored gems.
And they said, not our slanesh, not today, sister.
So when elder upon death, if they are lucky in their craft, they will have their soul
shoot right into their little spirit stones, which are placed along their armor.
And then for in their culture, when they say, you know, with so much venerance of their
own, like they're dead, they get placed into the infinity circuit.
I don't know what's the best way to describe an infinity circuit, Colin.
I don't know if you can.
What's the best artificial afterlife?
McDonald's, please.
It's like, it's kind of like, I think the reason it's called circuit is pretty important.
I imagine it very much is like a interweaving network, kind of like veins throughout craft
world ships.
That's like a way to put it.
So with so many elder dead, they were like, you know what, sometimes death is just not
going to stop me.
And so they said, we need to some of these people needed to get back out there.
You know, I mean, it's like the guy is like, I'm the coach, I'm retired, but hell, I'm
going to play with those teenagers.
Walk that back.
Yeah.
What?
What's so DJ Beasts is going to send me a meme about that.
I can already feel it.
So for the first of the elder, they decided like so much of their force or members of
their society are actually no longer part of the living realm and they need to augment
their own living forces and units.
So the undead have given another crack at this.
So with constructs that are made from wraith bone and other parts of like ancient Eldar
technology, they are formed into what are called wraith knights.
And they are pretty, I mean, their variants come in like ones that are much more related
to shooting or the melee variants, which I hate on the tail top.
Sometimes there's one question.
Have you been referring to wraith guard this entire time?
And you have a great guy.
I think I have a great night because I'm talking about the one.
There's also a race as well as a wraith guard and then the wraith knights as well.
Wraith guard themselves, though they take the spirit stones that come from maybe
the Eldar from the infinity circuit and then they are placed into these constructs.
And once again, my dude may have been my dude may be dead, but that's no excuse not to be
absolutely pounding town in the living realm.
The thing is, when you're kind of an undead ghost inhabiting a form, it's not quite like
a dreadnought for space marines.
These things are not really like fully alive.
They don't really perceive the material universe quite well.
I think they even specifically what's the word they use is it wraith site is the
particular one because they don't quite perceive the material universe like is a bit hazy.
So wraith knights are not like a perfect thing of like, oh, this person was just brought
back from the dead is very much like it's a ghost pilot and he's doing his best,
but it's not going to be perfect, though.
But they are, again, much more similar to like their who they were in like previous life,
though, although I don't know if this is in law column, but like they're slightly dulled
down between what they they're not like quite the vibrant warriors.
They are a lot like a dreadnought.
Yeah.
Talking cake as well as they see it.
It's like a crocodile with its eyes half under and above the water.
They see into them like through the warp into reality.
So it's like they're.
Is it also spirit seers as well, the ones who help guide them?
Yeah, they're the ones who go, all right, you focus on reality.
Yeah, they they often need a lot of help, though.
But my God, do these things represent especially on the tabletop at the moment?
They're not fun.
If you get a particularly powerful elder who has died, they get,
if I remember correctly, they get turned into race seers.
Which is the one.
Wraith lords.
I think Wraith Lord and then they're the ones that like powered by
it says specifically in the law, like these, the ones who their soul was so
it burned so strong and bright that they actually able to be slightly more
protected from slanesh to the somewhat stronger variants.
And then depending on the craft as well, because not all craft worlds
necessarily want to rely on basically taking out your own dead ghosts and your
you know, you don't want to put your mother into a pilot thing because
you're like, let her rest, my dude, she's fine.
Now, if I'm not correct on was it craft world, the Andan who particularly have
the most slash had the most at some point, they at one point were the most
populous craft world and then a cyclonic torpedo and tiered in high fleet later
and suddenly they were the least populated craft world.
Yeah, well, you could argue then a lot more of them have been turned into
Wraith Knights and Wraith Guard and all that stuff because they got a plentiful
supply, though, again, it's not like a perfect thing in terms of Warhammer,
like, you know, oh, everyone is fit to be Wraith Knight, just how like in Eldar
certain things can only pilot tighter their versions of Titans and all that
stuff, it's perfect.
But they essentially the dead March with the living in the Eldar and they're not
quite scary, the other ones, but they very much will cleave you into a
into and stomp you like like the ends in a tackle of two towers, we know like
that one bit with the orc and you just like.
Oh, my God.
The baby stream that was shared, I couldn't not share it.
I'm sorry.
They didn't any gameplay in this one.
Okay.
How do we.
Special.
Yeah, they have us to look at.
All the means my last one here, just my cheeky last one here.
40K has got vampires and it's not the nightlords and it's not the blood angels.
This is actually something that goes back to even quite old law and it's been
around for a long time.
They actually have vampires just straight up vampires, but they're not quite
vampires.
They have walk that you know, like someone saying like you don't have
vampires, we have vampires at home.
Unfortunately, this one is what vampires.
So originally, these are pretty much like much more bat like than compared to
what you would think of like Dracula.
And these are entirely just warp constructs, though.
Thank you, Mr Smith.
Well, this is both cringe and water based.
It's only cringe if you keep it.
I'm pretty good at space.
And so for what vampires themselves, they actually came about first of all
during the war in heaven, essentially when necrons and the elder and the old
ones around and they were messing up the galaxy and thanks to new law, they
actually created the old the chaos gods.
Thank you guys.
They make that change.
So back during the war in heaven, they actually created the old the chaos
gods in heaven.
The war used to be nice.
And then it suddenly wasn't it go.
I mean, people were littering and all that stuff.
And then I'm not littering.
Yeah, literally.
And then escalated to, you know, entire nations of I mean, was it when the
necrons were going around, they were and the Katana were just like free roaming.
Like suck entire planets dry of like ancient aliens that no many parking
tickets.
He was on it was obscene.
Unreal.
I did like that part in the way they mentioned like there are aliens that
existed and then they just like you'll never hear about them because the
necrons and the Katana killed them.
But essentially, it created such a term like a turmoil in the war that it
created its first kind of war creatures that are not necessarily chaos aligned.
These ones can be like, I think the second you win if everyone remembers
those things.
Oh, yeah.
Like new in ticks.
Well, they also created literal vampires.
And again, these like bat like creatures and what they do is they say, man, you
know, I like going to eat salad and I like having tofu in the weekends.
But there's a Wendy's out there and a taco and there's also a taco bell and
I'm ready to eviscerate.
So like the first ever war.
So hard to get in your balls.
I'm just saying, like I've never been to eat.
I understand I can go to Taco Bell here in the UK.
I don't think I can go to Wendy's, but like Colin, if I were to take like a
Wendy's, I don't know, burger and stuff it into a Taco Bell meal.
How much dysentery would I get?
I think that's how you get AIDS.
So, you know, all the creatures that were alive and then was the material
of a material universe, they all had like they had White Castle.
They had all the good stuff.
So we don't even have White Castle here in the UK.
In and out.
That's the best Gordon Ramsay.
So they these like bat like creatures essentially invaded into material
universe.
And what these guys suck is not blood, but essentially life force.
I'm not going to lie.
It like what Warhammer does a lot of times.
These creatures are mostly just a Warhammer rip off of something else.
Nowhere near as good as what like vampire counts.
But these ones are a little bit slightly different in their variation
because they just take life force and they often act as creatures where
they invade into like host.
Because obviously with most war creatures, they don't have a thing that
holds them into the universe.
So they need to host to basically take over their body and then they have
to keep jumping from hosts to essentially because they just drain life
forces that they do it.
This is probably you think like this goes relatively undetected and they
just would never know like it just kills a regular human every once in a
while.
It's not a problem except when it's not because it turns out they got a bit
of funny funny in them.
They a bit of a little bit of wastemen and they like to impersonate
powerful, the more powerful and the more impressive the person they are
more drawn to them.
I think it's probably because they people who live lavishly have better
life, more life energy, that stuff.
And so vampires are really hard to detect until the point where like they
like we have current politics in the way you were saying those it's like
imagining a vantage vampire just being like, it's the best blood there ever
is.
It's amazing.
I can't Conrad Van Carstein.
He's a great guy.
I love him.
They're all too skinny.
They are very detectable unless they often get like planetary governors or
like people of importance who they essentially that person starts to look
malnourished and something's wrong with them is because they got a literal
vampire demon thing in within them.
There's two main instances of when like an imperial governor was found to
have a vampire and they do sort of basically they literally take over the
bodies.
They're just doing what they want.
And they were essentially the Inquisition sent assassins straight after
it.
They were like, get that thing out of here.
Get off my table, scum.
Another one was when Black Templars essentially had the same problem.
They were sent to go wipe out one because these things can be incredibly
dangerous.
It doesn't say in law if like because there's only a slight problem problem,
which is they're like bat-like form.
It doesn't really explain if they're in their bat-like form or they can
transform into their bat-like form or that's just their true form.
But when they inhabit someone, they're essentially a parasite.
But this thing is essentially just is again, it isn't really like a
traditional undead vampire.
This thing is purely a spirit that is essentially a GW copy.
Why did I say that?
That being said, that's kind of my section a bit on ghosts and ghouls.
I think we have some donations.
Don't we?
Yes, we do.
We have 12 donations.
Let me just pop them on.
My eyes are so much first from Donkeyman USA for five buckaroos.
Eli, Colin and Colin.
Oh, no.
To be fair, counter argument.
Colin's bed is made.
Eli, what have you done?
What have you done?
That's the real Colin experience, dog.
I love how you interrogate.
The bed is made today.
Fuck you.
Oh, God.
No.
It's usually made.
From Tom Warren.
You guys want to read the next ones out?
Sure.
Let me give them a read.
I always have a stroke when I try and open the super chats and I don't know why.
I'm so funny.
It's on the main screen.
Oh, God.
Well, that's so much easier.
Yeah, I'll just put them up as we go.
Glass laughter.
Thank you for the two.
Colin should have made a costume of his bed.
Look, hindsight is 20-20 and I've wanted my damn thing.
All right.
People dressing up in bed sheets can be misinterpreted.
Yeah, we ain't going to go down that way.
I was considering taking a pillowcase and drawing a space marine face on it.
I was like, no, we know what that's coded as.
Let's not do that.
DJ Beast with a 10 AED.
We're going to figure out what that is eventually.
Eli got the same costume as me.
All right.
That's concerning.
H Meal Off with a 5 BGN.
Eli would rather buy a ball cap shave off the widow's beak.
Why did Davy Jones steal Sparrow's clothes?
That's the old green one, the year 20.
Oh, thank you very much.
Oh, yeah.
Colin should have dressed up as the strongest of the old world of Grail Knight.
Outside of Bretonnia, Colin has the correct opinion.
Why, thank you very much.
It's an airline.
You see more skin to let the thoughts in.
I'm going to take it.
I'll hold the finger for the 5CA.
Colin's Colin costume is so good.
He even.
How did you find a picture of that?
Well, you can see behind it.
It's like it's the stream yard.
It's from the Ultramarines episode.
I think he's in that bloody place.
DJ Beast, I think, has a bunch of backdrops about us on them so he can make memes.
So DJ Beast, you're a naughty scoundrel, but we love you.
He's a hero.
Speaking of naughty scoundrels, Eli, do you want to read the next row?
Yeah, sure.
H Meal Off, thank you for the two.
Bottom left is the third Mythbuster.
That's me, baby.
A little bit Jamie.
A little bit Jamie and thingy smashed together.
Quack damn you.
David Flaccoberry, I think you're the five.
Well done, Eli.
Just opened the stream without my glasses and wondered why Colin wasn't two screens.
Wow.
He really is uncanny, huh?
I shouldn't say that phrase. To be honest, when I opened the stream and we were like waiting for Eli, he joined in and we all went.
The fuck?
Oh, I see what he's done.
I see what he's done.
Doggy Man, you were saying that you were the two.
Get in the Wraith Construction, G.
I'll watch that show someday.
Don't.
Joseph Pollard, a member for six months.
Thank you.
Colin, wear a costume.
Is he scared?
He tried.
I'm not a part of this pagan filth.
Want to read the next one, pal?
Oh, I think that's it.
Is it?
Oh, yeah.
We read that one.
Oh, think about that one.
Mr. Mealough, how should keep the bandana for game this time?
Because they make Halloween.
That's a forehead.
It's just him coping with the lack of sales of lunch.
That's not going to last a year.
Come on.
He's got a lot on his mind.
Where did Colin get his horrific Halloween mask?
Guys, chill.
Chill, though.
Chill.
My eyes so bad.
We talk about watch it in the rain.
I can't remember which one to watch in the rain.
Is that the...
Watch it in the rain is the Warhammer horror story.
But honestly, I thought maybe I'll talk about it.
But realistically, everyone under the sun in the Warhammer community
who does lore that's horrific has done watch it in the rain.
So I thought, no, everyone else has done it.
There's plenty of content about it.
And if it was like the equivalent of like,
was it beating a dead horse?
That's all of Warhammer.
But that specifically is beating a dead horse with a dead horse.
It's double horsing.
Double horsing.
It's necrophilia.
Something's wrong with that.
It's what?
Well, no, what was I thinking of?
What goes through this guy's head?
What's the one where like you...
Like you've disturbed the remains of a dead body.
Not necrophilia.
Oh, my bad.
Is that something normal?
While you're drinking, Eli could be Vegeta.
He has the lack of hair and height needed.
And then rage, if you count the last debate, Caleb Collins for $5.
Thank you very much, Caleb.
How is that monetized?
YouTube just knows the real one when they see it.
I mean, I uploaded it and I was expecting to see flags
to know where to censor.
And then I was like, oh, no.
Okay.
I'll just re-upload it.
It's fine.
Cool.
So, rarest pep is notice how Colin gets excited when someone says
horse.
I don't know what he means by that.
That's what's doing to a dead body what Techless does to Colin, Hal.
I appreciate it.
Thank you.
Was it...
I think Colin, I think...
Did you have some scary ghosts slash things that you wanted to talk about?
I do.
I've got a mix today of things that are alive and not alive.
We got to keep things interesting.
I figured we start, you know, Halloween season, start with necromancy in Warhammer.
It's properly spooky, one could say.
The thing is, right, because let's just look at all the threats in Warhammer, right?
Fantasy.
Horse mention.
Okay.
Holy jack.
Why?
What is that profile picture?
It doesn't matter.
That is actually you.
Holy shit.
Bruh.
Literally him.
All the threats in Warhammer.
Look, Beastman, who cares?
Irrelevant.
Chaos, this is a problem.
But in fantasy, it's a problem that comes and goes.
You know, then an ever-chosen happens, it swamps down from the north,
and then it goes back away for a couple hundred years.
You don't got to worry about it that much.
A little bit, you know.
Cults still happen, but you can put it out of your mind for a bit, depending on where you live.
As long as you don't live in Keeslev or something.
But this, you know, for the sake of this scenario, you don't live in Keeslev.
Even then, you know, Keeslev beats Chaos.
They're good.
You know.
I'm gonna get to the Skaven later, so we'll save that.
What, the Dark Elves?
Don't live by a coast, and you're good.
Which, you know, most towns aren't by the coast in Warhammer.
You're good.
They're like gremlins.
Don't feed them after midnight, and don't get them wet.
Exactly.
And you'll find them with the Elder.
Yeah.
But Necromancy has a little bit of the awful of pretty much every other thing in the game.
And it's just every spirit Halloween sale coming at you at once.
For example, do you like zombies?
You think zombies are scary?
I think The Walking Dead is scary, but for different reasons,
because it's just an atrocious show.
Because they won't die.
It's scary that it kept going.
Are you aware that I watched every season?
I'm so sorry.
But I was at that point where I was like, I've started, so I'll finish.
And I was like, I shouldn't have finished.
I got to season like halfway into season four.
I was like, I'm done.
I'm good.
When they left the prison, I left the show.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's what happened to me.
Yeah, pretty much.
I mean, Negan was an interesting character.
But then his pivot to being a goodie is so unlikely and silly.
I was like, ah, I love Jeffery D. Morgan as much as everyone else.
And anything he's done is better.
But that doesn't mean it's good.
And that's a distinction we should make.
I loved him in Grey's Anatomy.
I loved him in Watchmen.
I loved him in everything he's been in.
But that doesn't necessarily mean that anything he's in is good.
I like you in The Walking Dead.
That doesn't make The Walking Dead good.
Exactly.
Especially when the zombies are going, Negan.
No, no, this is getting into fan fiction.
Stop that.
Stop that. Bad.
Bad Walking Dead.
Stop making more stuff.
You've had your time.
Now die like you should.
Or you're undead.
So you'll just live on and be forever as a shambling corpse.
So fitting for The Walking Dead is zombies are.
But Warhammer zombies are spookier.
If you get bit by one, you don't turn into a zombie
because it's just a corpse puppeted by magic.
The problem is you can't really get rid of them
because it's a corpse puppeted by magic.
And if you want to get rid of it, you've got to kill the necromancer doing it.
But the necromancer doing it presumably knows if he die.
He doesn't want to die to begin with.
So there's like a hundred zombies.
He can walk into a graveyard, walk out, and he's got an army.
Skeletons do.
You know, I've played Skyrim.
When you walk around a corner and there's a drogue or death lord,
there's a little bit of poop in my pants after that.
That's what necromancers do.
So what you're saying is like, I don't know, it was random film.
You know, Curse of the Black Pearl, random reference.
I don't know where I thought that.
It's like when the governor.
Stop believing in ghost stories.
Yeah.
Yeah, I know the governor starts like battling like the skeleton hand and the claw.
Oh, yeah.
Is it like that?
It's like that.
You know, you got to put a whole lot of work into really making sure it's dead if you want to do that.
But the problem is, one of the many problems is this is still a warhammer setting, you know,
fantasy or not.
It's really not hard to find unmarked graves of people.
So if necromancer just kind of walks long enough and just, I don't know, puts magical fields out or whatever,
he's got an army just from going through a walk through the empires, you know, just countryside.
It was probably 50 battles on that random spot in particular.
So by free army.
And it's really not a hard thing to do to get into necromancy is the thing as well.
It is an immediate way to damn your soul and the soul of everyone around you.
Yeah, I saw that.
That's great.
Don't do that.
Get that off the screen.
Mr. DJ Beast.
And even when necromancers are in charge, they're very still horrifying because they're death magic experts.
So he can just point at you and go, I'm going to I'm just going to suck your soul out.
Suck your soul out of your body.
Yeah, I did that wording on purpose.
What about it?
More of that notice.
Oh my God.
Just for the audiences out there, Raris Pepe has just delightfully said,
notice how how it gets exciting when poop is mentioned.
Thank you, rather.
Absolutely gassed.
And I'm glad you're I'm glad you're paying attention to notice.
But even if you don't find necromancy itself scary, right in Warhammer, a necromancer,
like I said, can throw every single costume and a spirit Halloween at you
because that's how the undead army works at Warhammer.
Ghosts, banshees, zombies, vampires.
Usually the vampires in charge of the necromancer, but they can do it.
So just by sheer volume, right, eventually they will throw something you're scared of at you.
They have a lot of options to pick from.
For some reason, the only thing that jumps into my mind was Randy and Safmar goes,
oh, no, it was a spooky ghost.
He's in that room with the ectoplasm everywhere.
Maybe that's what happened.
A necromancer came in and all over the place.
Especially with the Eldar, they're all degenerates anyway.
Oh, come on.
I don't know if anyone has this on their script, but there's a certain undead toad.
I don't know if Colin has that.
He's in a chair.
Oh, croak?
Yeah, I don't know if we wanted to...
That's not necromancy.
He just decided death didn't count.
It could happen to anyone, though.
Say if you stole some, I don't know, like Aztec-looking gold from the old ones,
and that kind of cursed you like a little bit.
I mean, it's a little bit.
A little bit, and you were just undead after that.
It's so, so, so annoying.
That's crazy.
It really is a pain.
Unfortunately...
Why are you unconvinced?
I don't think Warhammer fantasy...
I don't know.
When did Pirates of the Caribbean come out?
When did Luther Harkon come out?
I might have been about to say I don't think copying happened, but I think someone might have copied it.
It would also be a shame if, say you got the fifth installment in the franchise,
and they were like, we've run out of ideas.
So we need to circle back to what was that cool thing that we liked before?
Like, you know, the undead part?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Let's get that out again.
Jesus.
Oh, but...
And, spooky as it may sound,
ugh, but, and, spookiest of all is...
You know, anyone could be a necromancer.
It doesn't necessarily make you look like an old wrinkly ball sack of a human being.
It usually does, but consider this is equivalent to medieval Europe,
before bathing was really a thing.
They're gonna smell.
So, if you get a necromancer...
If someone's got that Horus hairline, you can kind of tell.
Horus hairline.
If someone's more than Warhammer, it's over.
You know, necromancy, your kindly neighbor can be one.
You'll never know until their puppets start eating you.
Although, the whole bald thing is like, you have Horus as the most optimal example,
but even Lufthuron, he had a full head of hair chaos instantly.
Chaos instantly bald.
Like, it's not even close.
It's like, if you're bald, you're an evil bugger.
Whereas Dante, who's like...
Dante, who's like, an epitome of light heroes,
not even like a buzz cut, long flowing box.
Hasn't fit in the helmet.
And, cave on strike.
Not the emo haircut, he's like, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Even Cardan Stronos, even though he's been lobotomized several times,
he's like, I've got hair, right?
Good man, robot man, good work.
The fulgurum still has pretty hair, still.
Yeah, well, he's still super duper evil.
Arguably the evilest.
He's got many handy hands, you know.
Well, Hal's winning the Who's Gringish.
Damn.
This is crazy.
Best day of fun.
I don't know, surprised.
Mine for a brief moment was 100% and then it subsided and I was like, yeah.
I drink Elspeth Von Draken's bath water.
Just wanted to read that one.
Real.
The thing, the last thing about Necromancy is that it's a real wide ranging scale, right?
At the bottom end of the scale, it's more sad than scary because it's some dude, you know,
he puts all his time figuring out, resurrects one single zombie who then falls apart,
and then a witch hunter shoots him in the brain.
Not, you know, not a real productive life.
The other end of the spectrum is Nagash, who is a god of the dead, invented it, and keeps
trying to build the halo rings because every single one of his BS plot stuff is what if
I killed everyone all at once?
And without fail, it's never shown that he just can't do this.
It's very much said he can do this.
He's such an inspiration.
I keep nuking him.
If I ever thought about giving up, I always think of Nagash because that man never gives up.
No, truly.
Also, he bleeds himself out of universe.
Look, I'm his top guy.
I can only the thankful, of course, but in the universe, he's horrifying.
You die, you go to him.
Like, at least in Age of Sigmar, unless you're...
This is one of those things where it sounds like there's a lot of ways to get out of it,
like, you know, ex-god has ex-clem on your soul.
But I think that's also one of those things where we know about a lot of those methods,
because those are the highlights.
If you're an average person in the universe, you're going to Nagash, and it's not a pleasant
afterlife.
Even before that, imagine being a dwarf and Nagash comes back.
Hey, where'd my god go?
Oh, he ate her.
And is now going to kill you, which sure enough, he did that to a lot of people.
He's a scary guy.
He's scary enough to make the chaos gods afraid.
Which, if that isn't, you know, then he's a skeleton.
So, I mean, what's what need more?
What?
Fuck!
What else do I need to say?
He's such a narcissist as well.
His character is so...
Unbelievable, because the dude has complete, like, just complete lack of, like, any decent...
He's the only character I've ever seen in anything in Warhammer, where, like, there's not a single
redeeming quality.
Not one.
Even Erebus is like a low-key, like, has probably one thing.
Nagash hasn't got a single thing.
He says faith.
Erebus has faith.
It's something.
Right?
Such as the power of Nagash.
He has faith in himself, man.
See, but that's something.
I guess Nagash has a whole lot of that.
He never back down, never what?
Never give up.
Look, look, he's the god of the dead.
It doesn't matter if you kill him.
It literally doesn't matter.
Where's he gonna go?
Back home?
Come back later.
Dude, the top guy.
I wish we had him in real life.
Nagash versus Malmhusein.
What a people-piping pro.
Oh my god.
That depends if the entrance is blocked by debris.
The entrance to the Black Pyramid blocked by debris.
Moving on swiftly from that one.
Oh my god.
To illustrate this next point, I, uh...
I've decided the best way to do it is to steal a narrative device from Isander and Coda.
So, not a script.
They haven't done fantasy.
So all the wording is original.
I like the idea they did.
So, you are John Empire Man.
You live in, you know...
Make it...
Just say German sounding gibberish.
That's the imperial town you live in.
Doesn't matter.
It's a, you know, medieval-ish Renaissance town.
Which for you means it's medieval times.
But there's fancier paintings hanging around the noble's house.
And, you know, life is...
Life is life.
You're a medieval peasant.
Could be better.
Could be a lot better.
But could be worse.
Medieval peasants actually didn't have the worst quality of life.
Not a good quality of life.
They definitely ate better than we did.
But it's...
That's a history rant for another time.
You know, you're a farmer, whatever.
And, you know, some things start going wrong, right?
But it's...
Nothing completely that ordinary, right?
Like...
There's a, you know, part of the harvest failed.
Like the crops must have gotten blight or something.
Like, they harvested, they were clearly like just bad.
That happens.
Like that's...
There's nothing necessarily magical or malevolent about that.
That's life.
Some livestock follow suit.
They get sick all of a sudden and die.
Again, this happens.
This is in modern times where you can get the cow doctor in.
Shit happens.
Then, you know, then...
Again, and...
More and more over the past few weeks,
caravans going in and out of the town
don't either arrive or make it where they're supposed to go.
Andy's seen something devious.
He slammed his desk.
DJ Beats is sending me memes again.
Oh, no.
I'm sorry.
That's a good one.
Also, I think I've just...
I've just seen evidence of an AI
Warhammer channel stealing my voice.
So there is that.
That sucks.
Sorry. Oh, damn.
Hell of a day for that.
Damn.
But...
The meme's gonna be shown.
I'll share the meme.
All right. Well, before I continue on, I want to see this.
It got quite the reaction out of Andy.
I don't...
I don't know if good is the word I would use
for what I'm about to see. I've got a bad feeling about this.
If you're gonna call me Obi-Wan Kenobi.
Yeah.
All I'm seeing is...
DJ Beats has compared me
to...
a boomer
guy. I don't even know
if he has a following or not.
But I'm like, I am too young to be
classified as a boomer. Please don't.
And it makes me sad.
But I think maybe I should just...
I should just accept
that this is where I am.
Just said it out.
Let me take a peep.
It should be in chat.
Let me just share it on the stream.
A small, weird
part of Lord, which is like... Oh, my God.
Oh, no. It might be devious, boys.
Looking at that
was horrid.
Fat Geralt. I love
Fat Geralt. Oh, my God.
Yeah.
Apparently, that's me.
Weird side tangent on one of those.
I just want to mention briefly
Lord Croak, who is literally like a
lizardman.
What is the deal?
For the audio, this is out there.
This is Andy.
This is Bro. What happened to Fat
Geralt? Bro looks like he's about
to meet his Discord kitten.
I don't even know what
that means.
We're too old for this, man.
Shout out to Lord Croak, though.
He was like a literal
god-tier mage of lizardmen.
The man is too...
Death claimed him, and then he
was literally like, nah.
And now his living ghost inhabits.
And I would say it's pretty terrifying.
Because what he can do on the battlefield is horrific.
Yeah, no. I mean...
Now I just had to really alert you.
I've never played that game.
I played the first one, and I thought it was kind of
meh. I thought Last of Us 1 was
mid, because you just press triangle when you go behind
enemies. And it's kind of mid.
Everyone's like, one is better than two.
One wasn't great.
Hot take.
Come at me.
Continue on.
Back to the thing.
You know, the caravans aren't
making it arriving, but again,
it's Warhammer. There's a lot of explanations.
You're...
John Imperialman is in a
somewhat remote town.
Could be bandits.
Could be beastmen. Could be a lot of things.
Some of those mundane, some of those scary.
But nothing that
particularly indicates your life
is about to get very, very, very
bad. And then...
And other things
like this can happen.
Town well water goes bad.
Again, million reasons that can happen.
Slowly but surely,
some things start happening that
aren't so mundane,
still bad, aren't so easily
explained away.
You keep swearing. You hear
like faint scratching
and skittering when it's
night. You're trying to sleep.
You hear a little rustling
under the floorboard, stuff like that.
You swear out of the corner of your eye.
You look. You can almost see hunched
over figures scurrying
about, running around, doing
whatever.
And it escalates. Again,
members of the town watch start
disappearing. Or maybe, you know,
some important figure, local
figure, just straight up assassinated.
And depending on
how close you are to the soon
to be end,
there's these weird little triangle symbols
dogged over the walls.
What the hell is that? You don't know
because out of everything the empire
educates its citizens on,
that's not one of them.
And
it gets worse and worse. There's even
less food. These horrible storms
are racking the place. Except now,
there's these weird glowing rocks
falling from the sky whenever the storm
happens. And when someone does
touch the rock, they turn
into a horrible mutant thing.
And then, right as
the town probably would have died off on its
own anyways,
the walls explode
and income pouring, thousands and
thousands of horrid ratmen
screaming for your death,
backed up by, I mean, look up what a health and
abomination is. Looking at that thing
is horrifying. That thing is
wrong.
Technology doesn't make
sense. Sometimes it blows up in their
face. Doesn't matter because another
hundred rats then line up behind
his body to take the weapon and
then shoot you anyways.
And let's say,
just for the sake of it, you manage
to escape this horrific fate
of a Skaven invasion.
You see everyone else getting
carted off. And let me tell you, there's a couple
there's all sorts of fates that await
someone captured by the Skaven. None of them
good.
Classic, you know, good old fashioned slavery.
There's one of them.
They might just eat you.
Always fun.
And if you're near the north and you're going
to be a clan molder, God help you.
I was going to say, with
Skaven,
one of the worst fates is like,
hey,
mice slash rats like cheese.
You're the cheese.
Yeah, you are the cheese.
You are the cheese now.
You're the cheese.
They might strap you to a
treadmill for all eternity to generate
electricity, because that's how they generate electricity.
They just get rats on a big hamster
wheel.
Then again, like I said, if you're going to clan molder,
you're going to see what happens.
What's the equivalent
of when a dark elder homunculus gets
bored? Human being legos.
You could literally just be
torsionwop stitched onto a massive
ginormous rat as like a
little like waving pair of hands.
You could literally be
grafted into something horrific.
Oh my God.
The reason for this, they wanted to see what would happen.
That's it.
They just do it.
Again, to
weirdly put a pause to spin on something you
shouldn't, at least they're willing to give something
a try. You at home,
you know what I mean?
You nasa.
You gave up before you even started.
Listen,
like Scriven
over there, he's willing to sew
an entire flock of humans
onto a carpet.
Rat man.
He's got the mindset.
And there's
two more
short steps in John Empire
Man's soon to be over life.
John Empire Man
flees to a neighboring town
after seeing everyone he's ever known and loved,
taken to some horrific fate,
God knows where, where he makes
it to a second town.
And then this process repeats all over.
And then John Empire Man
comes to the realization
that no matter where he goes on the planet,
there are always going to be
rats underneath his feet.
There is nowhere you can go.
There are, there's two places you can go.
But John Empire Man is
welcome in neither Ulthuan nor Athol
Loran, so there's nowhere he can go
that is safe from the rats.
And for the final
step in his journey, let's say
he makes it to some
important Imperial city,
Altdorf, Nuln, wherever, he goes
to the local witch hunter
order chapter house,
informs them of what he has seen,
that someone needs to know of the fate
of these two lost towns,
whereupon they thank him for his service,
inform him that the Skaven do not exist,
and then he is burned as a witch.
Because you do not talk about the Skaven in the Empire of Man.
They don't exist.
Why not?
Because if they don't...
I don't know, Andy, how about you?
No, but like, honestly,
why do they not rally people to fight the Skaven?
Are they just like, hey, this is such an overwhelming force,
don't acknowledge them, don't give them an inch,
they'll take a mile, is that the...
More or less, it's because...
Witch hunters are some of the most educated people in the Warhammer world,
bar none,
including the mages and the dwarf...
Alright, they do have the...
That's very rude.
They know about the Skaven,
and they're aware that if you ignore the Skaven,
they're mostly just going to kill each other,
because they're just the worst.
Whereas if some little rat got wind of the fact
that the Empire was mobilizing against them,
the Skaven would all go,
oh, God, the Man Things know we're here,
and they're going to try and kill us,
we got to get the jump on them.
So in your effort to attack the Skaven,
the fear is that you will instead cause the entire Underempire
to rise up and try and take you down.
They did try once, to be fair.
Well, twice, technically.
Because that was the end times as well.
But Godric and Felix were there.
Wasn't there one in Imperial history where it happened once,
and then...
That's how the Black Death in Warhammer fantasy happened.
They called it the Red Plague or something similar to that.
That was the second one the Skaven did in Bretonnia.
The first one was just the Black Death.
Oh, they did that, and then they're like afterwards.
Because it faded from living memory, didn't it, after that?
Yeah, it faded from living memory.
Which really makes me wonder how they justify
the name of Emperor Mandred Skaven Slayer.
Because as far as I know, he is just called that.
But the Skaven don't exist.
So what was he fighting?
In fact, for the last ten minutes,
I don't know what the hell Colin's been on about.
Didn't hear a single thing.
This way, Your Honor.
Because that eyeliner is blinding you from the truth.
In fact, I'm 45% blind in this eye, and I can't see this one.
That's... yeah.
Of course, the only happy ending for John Empire, man,
is if he talks to Victor Saltspire instead.
Who will then go off and kill ten trillion rat men.
And then just not progress.
And then do it all over again, because it never ends.
It is a vermin tide.
I should shag ma.
Is that all of your...
What?
Is that all of your, uh, chosen...
Those were mine.
The horror of the Skaven and good old necromancy.
We do have a few more donations, I believe,
than Eli is up.
A few more to go through here, boys, though.
Caleb Collins again.
Eli could be for Jeter.
Because of that lack of hair.
Same thing, though.
He has a lack of hair and height needed.
Oh, yeah, we did through that one, I think.
Thank you, though, Caleb.
It's a very important one, though.
It says, uh, shark borrower me 1074.
I wonder how Eli feels when he gets...
I can't say that out loud.
What did you mean by this?
What did you mean by this, shark borrower me?
What did he mean by this?
I think he was pretty clear with his question.
Where does this come from?
Is there an honest with it?
I can't say the word because YouTube will guess.
Ansi just...
No, it would not get you for that word.
Oh, OK.
You can say the word.
I'm sure.
You can say that word like, you know,
you pegged it down.
Maybe if we say it too much, it won't go.
It's going to sound weird, though.
It's pegged.
Ansi for the 20 Canadian bucks.
Thank you very much.
I don't know if there was anything to go along with that.
It wasn't there, but I appreciate that a lot.
Bunny cop, another regular.
Thank you, brother. He says, heard there was two Collins.
Pull the phone out to check.
I see two Collins, two bed, but zero Athena.
Athena is elsewhere right now.
I'm very sorry.
I need an Athena PNG.
Angry Homunculus for the two pounds,
says Necromancer's using Sonar
and Hussein's white.
I liked that one.
I'm going to be a free and warp stone.
Hey, the columns again. Thank you, brother.
What's worse, scaven breeders or to monkey lava?
It's gotta be the monkey lava every time.
Yeah, I'm on.
I'm going to breeders.
That's a government backed program.
That was the second one was just Hansu.
I'm going a little bit off.
True.
What?
That's that's crazy.
Like, ah,
Honsu's a little bit.
He's a lot. That was his wild ride.
I can't help.
Yeah, but like this
wild ride.
You kill you kill one guy
and you get rid of that.
Was a wild ride.
That wasn't a sponsor
thing. There's no funding
being given to the sponsor.
It was chaos.
Sponsored it.
I'm going by scale.
There's infinity.
I'm going to get rid of that first one.
Yeah.
Nolan Baker for the two bucks.
Is Collins pancreas a ghost or something else?
Wow.
It still works. Kind of.
The insulin part doesn't.
Hey, hey, 20, 20, 50.
This this shit, you know, medicine's me so far.
That shit going to be working.
We know it.
So please, please.
That stem cell study that came out of the
Yeah.
Five bucks chaos is reverse keeps.
So when you're talking about
always like
That's good.
Yeah.
For the four or five bucks.
It's sad attempts
at bringing something dead back.
Just like most people experience in with
relationships. Nagash has
the drip. How dare you lie?
Must have missed when it was
a talk about it.
For the five bucks. I recently heard about a time when
a corn bless some berserkers
to be immune to magic.
The Lord croak killed them with magic.
I love
That's got a lot of
He's just built
different.
Mr. Meehloff says, where were the skaven on
October the 7th?
I didn't
realize them.
Ed Claude.
Who's that?
What do you think made the first skaven?
Good question, actually.
There's several universe myths.
I don't think
it'll ever be said.
I don't think the old ones did.
No. The one called the doom of
Kavzar, I think it is, is like
the most
considered to be canon.
Yeah, that's the one like the bell tower.
But there's a couple other ones, depending
on who you ask. So you can
go look that up because there's a lot of them
and we don't have time to say them all right now.
Donkeyman USA is back.
Five bucks. In
quotation, horses are just elves with
hooves. That one
dwarf in Lord of the End.
That's pretty good.
I like that.
Horses are cool.
What?
Another one, Mr. Meehloff, wouldn't Eli's wife call the colts
when she sees Colin in her home?
We're aware.
I'd like to think I'm not such a
horrific being that, you know,
I was in Eli's house the first
thing you want to be to call the colts.
Mr. Meehloff again, he's being generous today. Colin is
Honsu's top guy.
I won't say that.
That's mean.
Jack in, I love spooky Warhammer.
Also, I'm gay.
Thanks again.
Glad to hear it man, good for you.
Indeed, constantly great presenters at that comment.
Enjoy being gay.
Eli, spooky, scary skeletons,
Eli, what have you brought to the table?
We have more Warhammer fantasy for us.
Big win for the boys.
We're talking about Heinrich Kimmler
and Krell, Lord of Undeath.
First of all, Heinrich Kimmler,
Sussus Amogus name.
They did not try very hard
with that one. It's like literally one letter off.
Two letters off.
The H-I
turned into a K-E.
Or H-E.
Yeah.
Well, these guys are
my favorite Warhammer fantasy duo.
Step aside, Godric and Felix.
The real OGs are in here right now.
Alright, I'm going to beat you.
We should do an expert,
be an expert on these guys someday.
It would give me an excuse to read that Godric and Felix book.
But Heinrich Kimmler is
the best living necromancer
in Warhammer fantasy because
Nagash isn't around at this point.
So he's not really alive.
Yeah, well yeah.
He's second only to Nagash
in Necromancy, which is pretty cool.
And he got into Necromancy
as a wee lad finding a very sketchy book
in his dad's
like shelf, in his locked shelf.
And ever since then he just freaking ran with it.
He went on a big crusade
reading all the knowledge on dark magic
that he could and destroying
entire covens of necromancers to get it.
He eventually would defeat and enthrall
a powerful group of liches
which gave him the name Lichmaster.
How he became so powerful so fast,
I don't know. I think he was like a book
in Nagash and he just got
he's just
he's just goaded.
He's naturally talented to do
evil.
For centuries, Heinrich
schemed and plotted throughout the whole
old world and eventually
he became the most powerful necromancer alive.
Easy. He tried
to involve
oh, sorry.
I have to read my notes
because I didn't write these very well apparently.
He's still ugly though.
Like, wouldn't you blend in better as a necromancer?
I don't say that. It doesn't have a bad boy.
It doesn't have a bad boy.
Wouldn't you blend in better as a necromancer?
If you were attractive?
Because people are just more unquestioning.
Yeah, but I think the more like
dark magic you touch the worse you look.
It does eventually like
wither your way because it's
basically death magic which
isn't inherently evil but still
can wither you a bit. Combined with
pure dark magic.
He looks like he scrapes his balls on the
pavement when he walks.
You know, he's just there
in his defense. He wasn't
always this old ugly guy.
Well, there is actually a reason why he's
There is, like, he's just old
too. Yeah.
I don't know how to tell you.
During this time, I think from what I can tell
he was actually like a young handsome lad.
As handsome as you can be
in these times.
So I think he was
a strapping young man while
defeating necromancers and raising the dead
and stuff. He would try
to do things that Nagash would like
to do with halo rings and
taking over the world.
But he was unfortunately
stopped by a group
of necromancers and vampires
who showed up to beat him up
because over the centuries he had wronged a lot of
these people and stole all their
dark knowledge and stuff.
So they all banded together.
I assume like dozens of necromancers
and vampires. And they
fought Heinrich who literally soloed
them by himself and
basically won. But then
this weird dark force that was with
him since he started kind of just
up and left all of a sudden and left him
as like empty husk. And so he took
all the magic that was left in him and
exploded basically and it killed everybody.
So he technically won.
But he left him as Darth Sidious
basically. Which actually
there is literally Star Wars references in his
backstory. I'm 100% sure.
This guy is just Darth Sidious.
But whatever.
Do it. Yeah.
For a while
he was this sad
homeless beggar just kind of wandering
around struggling to survive.
Old man. Sad fellow.
But eventually the dark power
came back to him and
would lead him to a burial site
with lots of runes, lots of protection.
Like magical protection.
And this was the burial site of Krell.
Who is freaking
so cool man.
But he would get to the
site and make a deal with the dark
gods and regain his power.
And he would raise this new companion
who is Krell. And Krell
was once a champion of Khorne.
One of the greatest champions of Khorne's ever lived.
He steezed on dwarves
in his time as a living.
But would eventually be killed obviously.
And then was resurrected by Nagash.
And he led Nagash's armies
and steezed on the dwarves again.
He actually won his part of the battle
between Nagash and Sigmar.
But obviously Nagash lost his battle
in that. And so
most of the armies crumbled. Krell
had to run away and flee with his
wights. And for a time they actually survived.
They would like rampage and
be terrorists all around
the right side.
Krell would go on his little crusade for a while.
And cause issues for the empire.
But eventually, unfortunately
at a frozen lake, I don't remember what it was called.
But he was caught by Sigmar
and him and his wights were defeated.
Krell was sealed away for centuries
until being found by Heinrich
himself. Krell
is an unstoppable force
in combat. He's basically invincible. He's
already tough in life and now he's literally
dead so he can't really be killed.
He's unkillable essentially.
He wields the black axe, which is a weapon
that sends black shards
into its victims heart once they are wounded
by it. So these little shards go in your
blood and go to your heart and kind of eat it.
Pretty nice.
Yeah, literally.
He's got the asbestos axe.
But
My bro literally is the
Senate. He is the Senate.
And
Krell's other
piece of
gear is the
armor of arrows
which makes him pretty much immune to magic
items. Cause whenever they go
towards it, it decays the enchantments on
the magic items. Easy peasy.
So anyways,
Heinrich raises Krell and
along with Krell, he raises all those wights who fought
beside him those centuries
ago, which are known as the Doom Legion
and they marched to war.
They went to Lamastel Abbey
in Bretonnia, which Heinrich
had tried to raid before.
But the maidens had placed
many holy wards and stuff making it very hard
to get through.
But this Abbey had lots of dark relics
and powerful necromancy things that he wanted to
take for himself.
Unfortunately, despite his great power
and vast legions, the wards of the Abbey
were too bright and powerful, which dampened his
powers and numbed his army.
So Krell and Heinrich fled, but Duke
Tankred would swear vengeance upon
them and the two would become rivals
and clash for many, many years to come.
And after all this time battling in
Bretonnia, Heinrich would come to hate them
almost as much as Cullen. They
were his main enemies. Good man.
Which they're also
your main enemy if you spawn as
Heinrich in total war.
Just like up in the Grey Mountains, I think.
But his next feat, which is pretty cool, I think, is he would infiltrate Athel Loren, which is not easy, by the way.
Most people who walk into Athel Loren
basically get lost instantly and then die.
But this was no problem to Mr. Heinrich, who could see through the deceptive magic very easily, as if it were child's play.
And he went to this burial site where all the intruders and whatever were kind of just throwing them buried in.
And he would raise this big army of barbarians there.
He headed to the Oak of Ages, but was ambushed by Dirthu,
big tree guy, if you're sure you'd recognize him, big tree guy with a sword.
But he almost beat Dirthu, he almost killed Dirthu.
But then Wood Elf reinforcements arrived and he had to leave.
He's very much, he has very bad bad guy-ism, where he's very powerful and he's very awesome, but he can't really achieve any of these grand plans because it would
there have to be Wood Elves to exist and Bretonnia still has to exist.
In fairness, walking into Athel Loren, killing like a thousand Wood Elves and then being able to leave is pretty good.
It's pretty badass, I think.
But these pale in comparisons to his very much deserved win that he did not win because he was in a Godric and Felix book.
But around this area of time though, he took on an apprentice necromancer who he then sent to infiltrate the Empire.
And his apprentice was named Danakin, which has to be, like, there's no way that's real.
Yeah, and Danakin would become the apprentice of a warrior priest of Sigmar.
What an interesting coincidence.
He has Anakin from Star Wars who was apprentice by the way.
Not just the men, but the women and the children.
The Apple War men, the Apple War women, and Apple War children.
He hates forests. He gets everywhere.
His feud with the Duke, or Duke Hancred, would eventually come to an end though where they had a final battle atop a massive bridge.
And it was going pretty well for Heinrich. He chose the bridge because you can't use cavalry on a bridge, really.
Easy peasy. He was beating the Bretonnias back, no problem.
Oh, and also, Krell and his wights went under the bridge through the freezing water to the other side to kill the Bretonnias over there, which was pretty cool.
The perk of being undead.
They were pretty much defeated, but then Mr. Hancred prays to the lady, prays to the lady, and the holy light comes and shines down on him and his knights.
And they all charge through the bridge, and you get through the entire army of undead to where Heinrich is.
And the only one who's able to intercept them on time is Krell.
Krell then 1v10s, or whatever the number was. Krell fights off the Duke and the knights at the same time, but is eventually pushed back and knocked off of the bridge by a hit from the Duke's Morningstar, unfortunately.
But still, he fought a Duke and probably Grey Knights, assuming. Maybe they weren't, but still pretty impressive, I think.
He would have won the 1v1, you know.
So the Duke alone gets to the Lichmaster and fights him. Heinrich's actually a pretty good duelist, despite being this old decrepit guy.
He's got a really sick sword and a cloak that lets him fly and become ethereal.
So he actually held his own pretty well, and he blasted the Duke with all this magic, but the Duke eventually got to him.
In the end, the Duke does a pretty much mortal wound to Heinrich, but he explodes and kind of disappears, and the Duke is left killed, and Heinrich is left running away as a ghost thing.
He takes a lot of damage a lot of the time, and he ends up being okay, because the dark magic kind of gets him together. It's pretty cool.
In the Vampire Counts episode, we talked about how Manfred took the Everchild. I forgot the elves' actual name.
Paliathra. Yeah. And Heinrich was a big part of that plan. In fact, he was probably the most important part of that plan.
He aided Manfred in stealing the Everchild in his plans to get Nagash back up and running.
But Heinrich didn't really stick around for that, because he doesn't want to be someone's lackey. He's too much of a G for that.
So his final, almost awesome act was to be in a Gottrick and Felix book. Poor fellow.
I've not read this book, I must admit. I'm very sad, but I do know the general story.
But hey, first of all, he's in a Gottrick and Felix book, and he survives, which is huge.
We're crazy. Yeah. We fight Gottrick and Felix even, and survives. Pretty good.
That's usually how you die. Yeah.
Well, he raises an army of 100,000 dead, and he takes the second most fortified castle in the Empire in six days.
He proceeds to it, and it's just easy peasy. He tricks the girl inside to let them in and stuff.
He would then attempt a ritual using the corpses and the nobles that he got within there to cause the entire Reikland to die, basically.
All the crops would wither away, all the water become poison, everyone would just die.
And he almost did it. He was this close. He had a whole court of wizards and stuff working with him.
But then Gottrick and Felix show up, and they do Gottrick and Felix things, unfortunately.
There. And again, giving Kemmler some credit.
Well, Krell, but there's no Krell without Kemmler.
He did hit Gottrick with the axe, and Gottrick looked over and was like, hey, I'm probably going to die.
I know how the axe works.
From what I can tell, Krell fought Gottrick and multiple slayers at the same time.
Pretty nice. I remember correctly, yes. I think it was Snorri.
Yeah, I think the little old nosebiter was there.
Krell is badass. Krell is freaking awesome.
Unfortunately, the plot of that book went swiftly nowhere.
Sad. Yeah. So yeah, then Gottrick and Felix show up.
They lose. Gottrick and the slayers kill Krell. Heinrich goes away and picks up Krell's remains.
And then he comes back because Krell's already dead. You can't really kill him.
But yeah, I think they're pretty cool characters. Heinrich is really cool.
I feel like he's never talked about, even though he's the most powerful Nickromancer in the old world.
As for the... Clap. I am...
We don't talk about the end times, okay? No end times or anything.
You know, Sigwald killed Krell, so...
Eli, I don't know if I missed you mention it, but Kemmler is Orhammer's first ever character.
Yeah, I saw that thumbnail.
Technically, I think Harry the Hammer was before him.
But this was before they gave him a name.
Yeah. So Kemmler is the first ever Orhammer character.
And I have his... I have his...
He's not put together, but I have his Chinese version right here.
And by Chinese I mean recast, but from China.
Anyways, I did write a little bit about their tabletop stuff, so I'll mention that.
What was the item of Nagash he was carrying, Colin, that Arkham was like, gimme?
And his staff.
It might have been his staff, but I don't remember. I'm sorry.
It's the reason he got clapped in the end times, isn't it?
And then Krell went on to go fight for Nagash.
I don't know if he...
Kemmler also went a bit insane and made deals with the Chaos Gods on top of it.
Yeah. Yeah.
Guy's a little cray cray.
But his warrior's pretty cool. I'll just mention that before I'm done.
Heinrich has the Chaos Tombblade, so it's a Chaos Sword, which is pretty neat.
And it immediately traps the soul of whoever he kills in battle
and allows him to reanimate them that instant as like, as graveyard.
So, or just powerful and dead in general.
So usually you can do that as like a zombie or something easy, but graveyard are pretty strong.
I like shock troops kind of, shock troop skeletons.
That's pretty cool.
On tabletop, it gave him plus two attacks.
And if he was leading the unit of skeletons or grave guards,
you could add more skeletons or graveyard, grave guard, if Kemmler killed somebody in close combat.
Pretty neat.
He has the Cloak of Mist and Shadow, which allowed him to become ethereal and fly,
which just gave him the option on tabletop to either fly or be ethereal that turn.
And ethereal meant you can only be wounded by magic weapons and nothing else.
And speaking of magic weapons, his skull staff is, has like the skull of a bird on top of it
that chatters to him whenever any magic is nearby, like about spells and sorcerers and wizards nearby.
And so he can't really, he can't really ever be caught off guard by an enemy magic user.
And it also helps him out with counter spells.
Yeah.
What are you saying?
On tabletop, on tabletop, it would mean all magic items within 12 inches of him would need to be declared.
Because I guess you didn't need to tell your opponent which guys had your magic items.
It's literally been 10 years since I played Warhammer Fantasy, but holy cow, I want to play it again.
And it gave him plus one to dispel magic.
Pretty nice.
Quail, on the other hand, the Black Axe gave him plus two strength, made him fight last,
and it caused D3 wounds if you, if you wounded, which back in those days, D3 wounds was a lot of wounds
because your characters only had two to four wounds most of the time.
That was a, that would have hurt to get hit with.
Yeah. So that would, if you rolled good, he would be insta-killing most like not high tier characters,
most like middle and low tier characters. Pretty cool.
And if you didn't get killed by that, you'd have to roll a dice at the beginning of each turn.
And if the dice roll was higher than the amount of wounds you had left, you take another wound.
So good odds you're going to be taking more wounds. So freaking cool.
His armor of borrows gave him a four plus save, which is fairly decent for Warhammer fantasy.
And if you wounded Krell with a magic weapon and then had him pass his save,
the magic weapon would become a regular weapon for the rest of the game and lose all of its abilities.
Pretty neat. I love Krell. Krell and Hamlich, kind of.
We need to do one more war war my fantasy. I'm so into it at the moment.
I mean, it's used to read that Godric and Felix books.
I think we have another round of donations, I think. Andy, just a next week before Andy rounds it off.
Donkeyman USA for the two bucks. Colin, bless Sigma, 10 hours win.
Soon. He has done some in the elect accounts quite a lot. Tom Warren for five bucks. Godric and Felix showed up.
Godric and Gotrick and Felix all over the place. Yeah, true.
Yes, sir. Gamath draws with two bucks. Bro is one in a crillion.
I like that.
Donkeyman USA for the five bucks. My metal 2000 edition of Thank All Model just arrived in the mail. Praise be.
Nice. The document in the hybrid. Yeah, he sent me pictures of it.
Isn't it? Yeah. It's given up on me. Andy, I believe we have a few last things to talk about for our Halloween special.
I wanted to talk about a few different things without dragging things on because we're already at like one hour 20.
So I'm just going to mention a couple of things. We've got three factions now for anyone interested tomorrow.
I am releasing a video on my channel on the Legion of the Damned, but I'm going to give you a quick primer tonight because.
Honestly, speaking, there's a lot we can get into the nitty gritty, nitty gritty, but like as it stands, here we are.
So the Legion of the Damned are the quintessential edgy Marines. They are undead Astartes.
It's flame wreathed black armor. They couldn't be more emo coded if you wanted.
But there are some discrepancies on their origins. So, for example.
Generally speaking, most people think they are descendants of the Firehawks, which is true.
We know for a fact that the Firehawks were given the Rapturous Rex, which was a big star fort.
It's not as big as the Phalanx, but it's massive. It's a star fort.
Sebastian IV gave it to them during the Age of Apostasy after they, the Imperial Pists, the Black Templars and the Soul Drinkers.
Killed the hell out of Goj Van Dyke and his men.
And they were like, hey, Firehawks, you're kind of a bunch of dickheads, but at least you do a good job. Have a big star fort.
We know for a fact the Legion of the Damned use that as their base for operations.
Now, here's the rub. While it's true that the Firehawks, who were very much all about, hey, we don't care about our allies,
like Colin, let's say you're a space marine chapter. I'm the Firehawks.
If you were like, hey, could you do me a favor?
You could say, hey, Andy, I've lost 100 men. I need reinforcements. Please send help.
Andy, I've lost 100 men. Send reinforcements.
Fuck you. I'm going to do my own thing. That's the Firehawks.
That's not very nice.
No, they were widely regarded as the high laws of terror and imperial authorities love them, but they're not nice people.
They are dicks. They would rather be like, I'll get a medal. You'll die. Screw you.
That's quite rude.
Yeah, even for space marines. However, because of the fact that the Legion of the Damned overwhelmingly has evidence that the Firehawks are now Legion of the Damned,
they now spend all their time trying to save space marines in dire circumstances.
Bear in mind, Legion of the Damned only appear during the absolute worst case scenario climactic moments of a battle.
Or any elder battle.
Anything. If the Imperium is going to suffer a catastrophic defeat, they spawn in.
And there are many interesting caveats.
So, for example, the first recorded moment we saw the Legion of the Damned was during the war in the Webway.
The Emperor was like, hey, loyalists, all you loyalists who died gracelessly, come at me. Come fight with me.
And Ferris Manus himself led them in a charge against the demons of the Warp.
Now, it's worth bearing in mind, yes, this may be the Legion of the Damned.
It's not like they weren't called the Legion of the Damned. They were just like a bunch of specters.
Yes, Ferris Manus is dead and he's very much about results over ethics.
And with the current way the Legion of the Damned fight, that also makes sense.
There are fan theories that maybe even to this day, the Legion of the Damned are led by Ferris Manus in the background
because their combat tactics reflect his methods of war.
So that said, that's all speculation.
All we know for certain is that the Legion of the Damned only appear when it is balls to the wall, absolute worst moment of all time.
So they were there during Abaddon, the Dyspoilers 13 Black Crusade.
They were first sighted during a... the first time they were sighted in the 40th millennium,
there was a bunch of corpses on a battlefield and the Inquisition, the audio Malleus, they saw this ship fleeing.
They're like, what the hell? And they went to have a look and they just found two coffins
and the coffins contained like decayed corpses in Ceramite, which was like burned black.
And then they had a look at the coffins like signatures and they're like, oh, this is a Firehawks chapter coffin.
And the Rapturous Wrecks where they're based seems to be the case.
And the Ordo Cronus are like, I'd give my life if I ever once got to see them in action.
Any space marine that sees them in action, they're like, wow, these guys are mental.
Like you can get shot by a melter bomb, you can get hit by a four sword.
Anything that would kill a Dreadnought, a Legion of the Damned shrugs off.
Because anytime they get hit by that is because any other thing they get hit by passes through them, like ghosty.
Like you go bang, bang, bang, it goes through them. They don't care.
But it's worth remembering that they have an affliction, a warp affliction, which results in the Pyromortis.
So to give you an idea, we know the Blood Angels have the Black Rage.
They go mental. In a similar vein, the Legion of the Damned, they get consumed by ethereal fire and it consumes their very soul.
So it's not just, oh, they're OP and they're annoying and it's like the cost of that is your very soul is consumed by the warp and no one will ever remember you lived.
And there are several pieces of information that regards that they use heresy pattern weapons.
They could be members of the Istvan 3 or 5 drop site massacre.
They could have members of the Calphatrocity, Remus Ventana during the Uriel Ventris books.
He was reborn as a member of the Legion of the Damned.
And he still had Ultramar Sigils on his armor, which is a rare case.
So some people are like, oh, maybe that was a one off because Honsu was attacking Calph in this example.
And so he was there at the exact right time at the exact right moment.
And they went, ah, Remus, come back. We need you.
And he was like, I'll be like a DLC Smash Bros.
Everyone's here. Like that could be the case.
There's no evidence he he joined the Legion of the Damned entire, but he definitely joined them for one moment.
I've got the best analogy I'm thinking of.
Because everyone here made it to the end of Naruto.
No, I know what happens, but.
Mike Guy, the eighth in a gate.
Does anyone know what I'm talking about?
Yeah, Mike Guy, Mike Guy, Mike, real one, eight in a gate.
Like just for the uninitiated, then she has a thing where he basically consumes his own life force
and then becomes like slightly red and on fire.
And then he basically he'll die within a minute.
But he is unbelievably good for that minute.
But my God, my dude, that rock so hard, by the way, people need to watch that fight.
I love Mike and Guy. Shut up.
Well, all I'm going to say is that
Legion of the Damned are a weird bunch because even to like people who survive their campaigns, they're happy that they didn't die.
But there are reports of like if Colin was a member of like the civilian populace.
OK, you'll get amnesia. I'm guaranteeing you won't remember them.
But until the day you die, you will forever smell in your nostrils the decaying flesh of their like chapter.
And you won't know why. It's like, oh,
and even the Orspex devices and Mechanicus scanning devices that try to like because the Legion of the Damned have a unique thing where they can just teleport wherever they want at any time through the warp, because they just they use the warp in its purity.
They don't use the Astronomicon. It's uniquely their thing.
The Ordo Cronus is like that'd be really useful if we can use this every time they've ever attempted to try and like figure out how they do this.
The machine spirits of the scanning device they use have like PTSD.
They forget everything and they don't work.
So only like Magos and amazing tech Marines can be like this Orspex is broken.
I can restore it. And even if they like repair them, they don't remember anything they've had to do with Legion of the Damned.
And that's partially because the Legion of the Damned is like, no, this is like a virus.
This is like an affliction. Something's wrong.
Yeah, we don't want this. We don't want you to have this.
Even when they fight alongside Space Marines are like, we don't want to infect you.
That's why we're like, we're in, we're out, we don't do any fanfare, because you could get infected. And that's a bad thing.
And they're all insane.
What's like, is it like a chalice or something or a skull?
They have their veteran sergeant has a crows ears that saps the soul out of the living.
And by doing so, he can restore wounded legions of the damned.
But it's like, even then they're sparing with the use of it because they're like, we don't we're cool.
We don't want you to be like me because it sucks.
It sucks. I'm insane and I'm undead, but I'm not quite undead and I might be aligned to chaos and it sucks.
But because I am so righteous in my fervence to the emperor, I'm not going to fall to chaos.
I'm going to use it against them. But you don't want to be me, bro.
You don't you don't know what you're getting into.
You couldn't be me.
Don't be like me. Don't do it. It's cringe. Stop.
It's not worth it.
That's kind of the Legion of the Damned. It's not worth it.
They look they are work is amazing for them, though.
Oh, my God. It's a criminal that they aren't on the tabletop anymore.
Yeah. Oh, my God.
I have some other examples of undead of star.
So if you'd like them, yes, I've only got two left.
So the other one is the iron hands.
I enhance criminally underrepresented during the the forty K law.
They have a bit of a boost in porous heresy.
But like so when you think I and and you think keys of hell.
Now, what are the keys of hell?
The keys of hell are a ancient piece of technology that predates the 30th
million, predates the Great Crusade that was retrieved from the iron hands.
Primark, Ferris Manus.
It's a forbidden piece of technology.
Which basically gives cybernetic resurrection.
So your toaster dies, your warranty expires.
He's a hell. It's alive.
But every time you make a batch of toast, it goes in the name.
Oh, it's fine. It's fine.
It is real. But your whole electronics want to murder you.
Yeah. And it's so bad that Ferris Manus didn't tell the mechanic us about this.
He was like, they don't need to know this is heresy.
But it could be useful.
So he locked this technology away and he basically said, if you're not an iron hand, you don't need to know about this.
And there's a story called Riven.
Not to be confused with the Riven Hound from the World Eaters.
But there's a story called Riven about Creus, who is part of the Crusader host, which are every single legion had an exemplar who stayed on terror during the heresy.
He was like, you're part of the Crusader host.
We're going to learn from you because you're kind of injured or you're too old to fight and blah, blah, blah.
And he went with an Imperial fist to find iron hands in order to fight Horus.
And he managed to go on a ship where they were like, oh, we're iron hands.
They were creepy as F.
And he's like, what the hell is going on?
And he found out they had like a gigantic fridge on their ship and they were all dead.
But they've been resurrected with the keys of hell.
And the end of the story is like the Imperial first captain.
He's like, brah, this is heresy.
We should go back to the we should go back to the throne world and tell people.
And was like, no, you don't understand our primarchs dead.
We were already damned.
Let's just give them what for before we die.
So he actually like sends him away.
He's like, no, you put me in chains.
I'm now shackling. He chains them up.
He's like, you're going to terror and telling them what we've done.
But I don't give a shit because I'm going to get my revenge on the sons of Horus.
And he leaves his undead iron hands to fight the sons of Horus because as an example,
I recently did a video on Cardan Stronos.
There's a faction called Hellfathers in Iron Hands lore.
Oh, yeah.
Everyone in the in everyone in the chapter has no idea what these guys are about.
They're just like they don't speak.
They stare at you uncannily all the time.
Just like strangely quiet like this.
For your listeners, he's staring directly into the soul of the audience.
Yeah, Colin, too.
Jesus Christ, that's close.
They just do that all day and they don't say a word.
And during Cardan Stronos's first book, the Eye of Medusa,
there's a point where he's confronted by Iron Father Christos and a Hellfather.
And he's like, you're not doing what you're supposed to be doing.
I'm going to kill all your brothers in Clay Stronos.
And he does. He kills most of them.
And the Hellfather shoots a bunch of them.
And then one of Clan of Ernie is like, brah, what are you doing?
I don't like how this is going.
And he shoots the Hellfather in the head and his head blows up.
That guy is then killed by the Hellfather for retaliatory volley from a headless Hellfather.
I should give you the idea of like, you don't mess with the Hellfathers because they have no emotions.
They just function. And even if you blow off their heads, they do not care.
And the whole story of the Riven is like, these are perfect enemies to the War Master and his forces
because they may be traitors, but they're not damned.
And it's like, we're dead and we don't give a shit. We'll kill you anyway.
And we don't care if we die because we're dead anyway.
You can't kill a dead man.
Exactly. The keys of Hell are pretty...
Like, Ferus Manus found the technology in the Sarkozen formulae and he sealed them away.
And he was like, I don't really want my sons to use this ever.
But they did because he was dead anyway.
And not being funny...
There it is.
But if you were an Iron Hand and you're like, my Primarch is dead.
He's practically at this point the only dead Primarch.
Like, Sanguinis is alive at this point.
Vulcan respawns like an MF.
And Corvus Corax is a bird so he keeps flying away.
Vulcan, cheated.
Cheated. You're the only Legion who has a dead Primarch.
Cheater or Loyalist. You're the only one who has a dead Primarch.
You go, F it. I'm just gonna go for it.
I'm just gonna die and I don't care.
Why wouldn't you at that point?
At that point it's just pride.
It's just like, I'm gonna turn the keys of Hell and I'm gonna become a specter of death.
You can kill me as many times as you want.
It doesn't matter because I'm gonna kill you anyway.
Every ten men you throw at me, you can kill me ten times.
I'll come back and I'll kill you.
That's the Iron Hands modus operandi and that's pretty creepy.
Wasn't even scary at part.
Technically inside the thing they're actually conscious but they're locked out of their body, isn't it?
I think most of them are like that.
They are technically in there but it's just like a fleeting consciousness.
And they literally are aware of the fact that they gave up their body and then someone else is in control.
Which is terrifying.
They kind of remind me a bit of an organic version of the Rubric Marines.
The Rubric Marines of the Thousand Seasons, they don't understand like, oh I'm dead.
The Iron Hands are like, I'm inhabiting a shell of Ceramite but I don't care because I have a job to do.
It's like edgy Rubric Marines.
It's like all is dust.
Yeah.
But I don't give a shh.
All is rust, if you will.
And this is good.
All is rust.
All is rust and I'm corroding you.
It's especially terrifying because even the Chaos Traitors have brotherhood.
Even they have something amongst them.
They were like, I stand with Abaddon because he's my boy and we've been fighting for a century.
And these guys literally don't, there's not a single shred of human.
They're like, I don't even care about the Emperor that much.
My dad's dead.
You'll die next.
That's the whole thing.
So come on.
Come get me.
Even Death can't kill me.
Come get me.
People are terrifying when they're near them.
Terrifying.
Yeah, they are unnerving.
Even Cardan Stronos, who is the current chapter master of the Iron Hands, when he first sees them, he's like,
We know about them.
Don't look at them.
Don't touch them.
Don't look at them particularly.
They're as creepy as F.
And the Eye of Medusa, where they have the Iron Council, where they all commune.
The Iron Hands are unique because they don't have a chapter master.
They have a war leader and they elect them.
And every time a battle by the war leader is won or lost, they go, shall we re-elect them as chapter master?
Or should we say someone else should do it?
And the Iron Council has been chapter master for over 300 years because the Iron Council is like, that's our guy, that's our guy, that's our guy.
Even when he lost, he lost against the Far Side enclaves.
And the Iron Council were like, nah, he's still great.
Reappoint him because he's amazing.
And literally him.
Yeah.
Their chamber is guarded by the Hell Fathers and they just stand there.
They don't talk and they just...
Oh, man. Give us Iron Hands tabletop things, please.
Oh, I beg for like to...
That's the Hell Fathers in a sinister manner.
I do have one last faction to talk about.
Sure. Not as fast.
It's a really niche one, but I thought it was really interesting.
So during the second Black Legion book, called Black Legion, there is a brief moment where Abaddon and friends are going through the warp and they encounter a warbound that's like the chaos mirror for the Legion of the Damned.
And they're called the Warp Ghosts.
Let's give you an idea.
They exist between life and death.
They have like a green aura.
Like when you see them, they project this like green glow.
And during M31, Iskandar Kion from the Thousand Sons who's part of the Black Legion, he defected.
He was like, they're futuristic, like they're more advanced than the Imperium, which is weird.
Like they're more technologically sophisticated than the Imperium in the 31st millennium.
They're not chaos aligned as such.
They're more like mercenaries, and no one knows where they come from.
They...
Even the Ordo Malleus is like, who the fuck are these guys? These gray armor, like they're carcaradone-esque, but without the pale skin.
They're just like a bunch of like chaos ghosts.
Like, what's with these guys? And they're like, I don't know.
And they are known as the Ferrymen of the Eye of Terror.
So whenever you go for the Eye of Terror, you can bargain with the Ferrymen.
Abaddon himself is like, oh, I want to form the Black Legion.
He gets confronted by the Ferrymen.
And they were like, you got to pay the toll.
You got to pay the toll to get in the kid's hole.
You got to pay the toll to get in.
Says the Ferryman.
They're this weird spectral chapter that exists outside of chaos.
They're not goodies. They're not loyalists.
But they are not chaos exactly.
They're weird.
And so Abaddon mysteriously has to offer them something.
And there's a whole thing where, like, he has a friend of his during his venture through the first book.
And he's talking to the appointed Seneschal of the Ghost Men, the warp ghosts.
And then the guy takes his helmet off.
And it's his friend. But he's several hundred years aged.
And it's like, hold on.
Your confidant has aged 200 plus maybe more years.
So they exist out of time.
And you sacrificed him earlier in the book. But he's aged a lot.
But is he really in a start? Because he's not really in a start.
He's but he is now.
And there's this weird mysteriousness where it's like they're so uncanny.
Even chaos is unsettled by them.
And they don't quite like them.
And they're mercenaries.
But that being said, they're known as the world breakers.
They were present during Abaddon the Spoilers first and 13th Black Crusades.
They are they have an extremely overpowered fleet, which neither chaos nor imperial nor
Xenos archives know where it comes from.
And they're weird.
Part of their charm is that they are overpowered, but they are hesitant to get involved.
And that's kind of the thing about the warp ghosts.
They are strange as heck.
And they are allied to no one specifically.
But Abaddon the Spoiler had to make.
They're only in one book. But like Abaddon has to sacrifice something to them, which doesn't really reveal properly.
And it's all like, is it winning the first Black Crusade?
I mean, they're there at the first one. They were there at the first team.
They're there. So they obviously have a stake in it.
But they're also like, hey, you're not above us.
Your chaos stuff, your imperial stuff is beneath us.
We don't care. The guy you were friends with, he's actually our leader now.
And we're now 200 plus years in the future from when you spoke to him like the other month.
Like, huh? They're weird as heck.
This is ADB writing.
And I think they're the spookiest action because they're like...
And remember, Black Legion is supposed to be a trilogy.
We've only got two. Where's the third book?
It will come one day. We'll get it.
Can we get the third one, please?
It's time for the Inari trilogy to finish.
We don't need to finish that one.
I read the Black Legion books when I was like 14.
That being said, though, is there any more donations in there that we all caught up?
Possibly.
DJ Beast says how moisturizes himself with frozen McDonald's grease.
That's crazy.
I'm not a fan of that.
Extra medium for the two bucks. The Legion of the Damned is just 40k stormcast.
I really hate that sentence.
I mean, I will say that when the Legion of the Damned dies, they die die.
They don't just die. Their soul gets burned to a crisp.
They're out.
They're gone.
Mr. Mealove again, he says, I was a boy on Kalth when law crimes attacks.
Man, Kalth really be getting it.
They just...
That's a Chiron quote.
Everyone's been bricking it on Reddit.
They're like, how is he 10,000 years old?
He's a gray shield.
Still doesn't beat I was there the day Horace shat himself.
There's a warmer book where the Inquisitor captured one of the Legion of the Damned.
It's called the Flames of Predition, I think.
I think it was an Ordo Chronos Inquisitor.
That's their whole thing.
The Ordo Chronos are like, if I die at 200 years old and I have one chance to see them in person, I'll die happy.
That's their whole thing.
Extra medium for the five bucks.
The Keys of Hell, aka just make Iron Hands a Necron faction, you cowards.
There's always quite a few artworks of people crossing over Iron Hands and Necrons things.
Maybe a cool team up.
Mr. Iron Headless Ferris wore some Necron stuff on his arms.
I don't think we prepared a question of the week, but if we think of one quickly for all the lovely, beautiful people...
Maybe hashtag spoopy?
Hashtag spooky.
What's the spookiest thing you see in Warhammer?
Maybe if you have to write a new piece of Warhammer lore, that's terrifying for someone else.
And obviously wrong answers, maybe.
Something terrifying when you made it up.
Hashtag spooky, though.
Thank you everyone who did the donations over the stream.
As you can tell, we'll probably not be dressing up like this most of the time.
There's a few more.
I will say though, if I get my costume when I get it the next stream, I'll wear it.
Sorry for not having the costume in time.
Maybe Colin will save his one for a special day.
Or maybe we'll all dress like a Warhammer lore crimes member, sorry.
That being said though, everyone, thank you guys so much for watching and listening.
If you did make it this far, obviously a like is very much appreciated.
Hope you enjoyed a little selection of our sort of things we like about Halloween-y, spooky stuff.
And we'll catch you guys on the next one.
Peace.
Bye.
Love you.
Bye bye.
Happy Halloween.
Yeah.
Bye.