So, Sevatar won his duel because he cheated. He was the only one Sigismund didn't beat
because he doesn't shove sand in his eyes or something and then goes, I win! And it's
like, you didn't fight with honor.
So in the Sigismund book, it's because basically Sigismund is wondering why he's not winning,
because usually when he fights he's like, I can see the moment coming, like many steps
ahead and every time that happens Sevatar seems to like weirdly counter, he's like,
what was he, like psychic or something? And eventually Sevatar is about to lose, like
he feels he's about to lose it so he headbutts him. And so even though in the listings where
they say, because obviously they're all watching it around him, they say that Sevatar says
oh ha ha I won, but then he ends up, but then everyone around him basically says oh you
lost because you cheated. So he gets disqualified.
When Loken does it to Lucius, Lucius is the bad guy. When it gets done to Sevatar, or
when it gets done to-
Oh my gosh.
That's because we know what Lucius turns into.
Oh my gosh, this is so cringe. I'm so grumpy now. What the heck, I've never even heard
of this. Everyone harps on Lucius so much for that Loken duel.
Eli just leaves the Discord chat in frustration.
I'm gonna send brutal acts of violence very soon.
Hello everyone and welcome to another Lore Crimes Pub Quiz where one of us torments the
other three of us and then Hal gets victory at the end. We're gonna keep that streak going
with today's episode. Andy is gonna be quizzing us on none other than Sigismund of, I'll use
a couple chapters actually. He was a Legion, then a chapter, and quite the Space Marine.
And any more than that, I'm going to Sneeze.
Oh god.
He's gonna Sneeze.
Oh god, pardon me. It's even worse. I didn't Sneeze.
But yes, today, my nose hurting me aside, today is a quiz about Sigismund. I wanted
to say a couple of things, but I'm afraid that anything I say will end up as a question.
So I suppose I'll just pass it right on over to Andy to get the ball rolling a little bit.
Thank you very much Colin. So yes, today we are talking about the exemplar of the Imperial
Fists and the first chapter master of everyone's favorite lunatics, the Black Templars. It's
gonna be a fun one. Very much a fan favorite character. Everyone loves Sigismund. I do
find he's one of those characters where like, everyone likes him. But I don't know if everyone
like, I've never met anyone who's like, oh, Sigismund is my favorite character. It's more
like he's kind of like Vulcan in a way. Like a lot of people are like, oh, I really like
him but my favorite character is Dante or something like that. I don't know. But let's
go down the board. So first of all, let's start with, we'll go through, we won't pick
favorites. We'll go for alphabetical order. So Colin, what is your opinion on Sigismund
and how do you feel about him?
I think you summed it up pretty well. You know, I like him. But the kind of, the opinion
kind of stops there. It's like, yeah, I like him. He's cool. I think the reason for that,
you brought it up, how no one's like, yeah, he's my favorite. It's the same reason that
no one's like, favorite video game character is Doomguy. But there's also no one who dislikes
Doomguy. You know, yeah, he's awesome. He's great. He's a walking, talking, not really
talking, murder machine. It's great. It's fun to watch him do his thing. But not a lot
of personality. It starts and ends with violence.
Yes. And that's the way you want it in Warhammer 40,000.
Perfect. Just, you know, not the most interesting character.
What about you, Eli? Do you like Sigismund? Have you got good knowledge about Sigismund?
What's your opinion?
He is what they call a space marine.
He's cool. His little showdown in Warhawk or whatever was disappointing. That's about all
I remember. It was like a one paragraph fight, which was too bad. If even. But, you know,
it's fine.
Well, I hate to ask. Sorry, Hal, because you keep winning and I'm getting frustrated with
you. What's your knowledge on Sigismund and do you like him?
I've read parts. I read a few of the books that he kind of side characters in. My opinion of him
is he I like the idea that the best quote unquote space marine ever is just a normal
Imperial First dude. And it's not like all the advantages like so many others get like, better
psychers or space wolves just being unreasonably being chucked loads of W's and then still having
the L of the wolf thing. And then quite a few other just loads of other chapters and like legions
get like some weird genetic advantage. But yet, the best of all them is just normal old Sigismund
just because he's a normal well, he's not normal space marine, but you know, just the normal guy
is actually like the best fighter.
He's just really angry. He's just he's just an all the way up to 10 dexterity build, not much
charisma, not much, you know, it's just just decks, just slash slash, I'll cut you up mate.
I will counter to Eli actually, I because of his earlier stuff in certain books, I'm trying to
give away something like law knowledge there. The actual fight in Warhawk is I enjoyed that because
it's meant to show how far above he is the previous level. So even as much as brief as it was,
I remember trying to hunt for that particular part of the book. I remember going, Oh, wow, like, it
was that easy for him. And I didn't know that was kind of
I expected the other guy to put up a little bit more of a fight.
It's fun to see the other guy, we'll see can't mention yet. The other guy completely crumble in
the face of the the power he chose and it not being enough. I like Sigismund. He's not my
favorite, like many people said, but he's okay. It's cool. All right. Well, I know, we've just kind of
sorry, Colin. I wanted to ask you said he's he's he's just Dex build. Are you trying to say he's
baby's first from soft character? Yeah, basically. I mean, he's good at what he does. But you know,
we're kind of bashing Sigismund in his own episode. This is a bit weird.
This is also a public service announcement from Colin. If you if you are one of those people who
who only runs dexterity builds and souls games and Elden Ring, I hate you. Race big stick.
Invest in poise and resistance like everyone else. Resistance. Resistance is important.
But no, it isn't. Don't get it. Watch a video video.
All about the hit frames. It's about making the hit frames bigger.
So you don't get hit. It's Dark Souls 2. Yeah. Anyway, without further ado, are we all ready
to begin the beginner section of the pub quiz? Can I ask one question quick? He's a Colin.
Yes. What was the name of the king in Dark Souls 2? The one.
Dammit. Okay. I was going to get me lacking. Here's a cool Colin gets a half point for that.
Now I'm just joking. Yeah, we already a good boy. We are ready for Sigismund. We are ready.
Okay. Okey dokey. Well, here we go. Then question number one, Sigismund. And this is going to be
really easy. Start off. Okay. So don't worry. I've got you. Right. Sigismund was the first
chapter master of the Black Templar successor Legion. Always his unique rank, which is used
solely by the Black Templars chapter. Oh, starting off nice and easy. This could have tripped someone
up if they were weren't I didn't spell that right. Okay. This is where my spelling starts to actually
be my crutch. But an answer from how? Luckily, there's another character who's also of this
rank. So yeah, I should clarify this isn't a unique title. He only has this is just when you're in
charge of the Black Templars. What are you called? I have a weird question. Why is it the current,
you know what has not black armor? Coz Drip Drip is important. Drip is important. And
damn what anyone else says. He's chapter master. He gets to do what he gets to do what he wants.
How? God. That is true. If you're the chapter master, you're kind of the end all be all of
authority. Pure on Blackheart vibes there. Love that guy. He's he's a real one. That's what I
want to do on my turn of podcast. Oh, there we go. Anyways, why can't we defend the maelstrom that
costs money here on and we hate you. Thank you. Bye lords. I don't care who sends who they send. I
am not paying my taxes said here. Right. It's character. Everyone's answers are in. So it's
time for question number two. Sigismund is noted as the first to utter one of the most
uh shall we say popular lines in Warhammer history. What is the quote? Oh,
this isn't as difficult as you might think. It's think think of like the staple go to lines.
People say when when it's like oh it's a line from Warhammer 40,000. You'll probably get it.
Um it's very popular. Funny then is incredibly tempting but I don't want to throw just yet.
What are we talking about before we started? Throwing throw right?
What did we what what did we talk about before we started Colin?
How's gonna win anyways. More discussions about British cuisine and breakfast. Yeah.
I mean I basically just just for for full transparency to everyone listening. I basically
said to the other two in the chat. I'm going to be rooting for you to win this time because
Hal keeps winning and it makes his podium look sparklier than all of ours and that upsets me.
So I'm I'm gunning for him whenever I'm competing and when I'm quiz master I'm hoping he loses.
I'm just putting him there. Wow I'm literally being sabotaged. It'll be fine when you when like
we catch up but if you if you keep this lead of like five points ahead or whatever it is we
might kick you out of lore crowns. We gotta stop talking. Just read more lore crowns. I've got
Horace Hairsy bro. Oh man. Just jokes we love you really Hal. Here you go. Feel better.
Alright. Cyber kisses. I've had I've had all the answers in it's time for the third question.
The last question for the beginner section. During the Siege of Terror Sigismund would be the first
to bear a title of immense importance to his future chapter which denotes him as the mightiest
of the Imperium's warriors. What is the title? It's actually uh I know that I'm so sorry boys I
do know this one I think. It's actually a really if I meant to I might give a hint to someone but
if I think it's Malkador. No that's a different name but Dawn I think Dawn specifically is there
for that conversation. So what did they call him? Yeah which is a very it's a good scene actually
because it's a nice bringing together of uh Dawn and Sigismund since the beginning of the heresy
they've not been friends and it's been very sad for Sigismund. Why weren't they friends? I don't
want to say. It's not going to be involved in the system. Because Sigismund had in inadvertently
betrayed Dawn because he uh gave into some superstitions which an Astarte is not meant to
do because of good old imperial truth and Sigismund was feeling guilty he told Dawn that he had done
this act like he'd basically he'd defied an order of him or like kind of subverted an order of him
which Dawn at the time was like a bit weird but I don't get okay yeah and then Dawn found out the
truth why he did it and then Dawn disowned him and he actually like shouted to him and he takes a
sword and like plunges it into like you are not my son you're like oh daddy please. Dawn never
gets emotional so it's pretty like and I think if there's in that scene Sigismund literally starts
like shake and his like whole body goes numb he's like whoa. Yeah like imagine I'm sure we've all
had a moment in our lives where we've had like our dad tell us off for doing something stupid
but imagine your dad was a Primarchs like that's scary that's really scary very loud. I think I
think very loud. Strong words for a man without a pancreas I don't know. First of all it hasn't
gone anywhere you know the beta cells don't work second of all bravery is not stored in the pancreas
I misinterpreted your I thought your username was pancreas no bracket work so like you've got to
work because I'm commanding people to get back to work exactly when I consume sugar and my pancreas
releases insulin. Fuck you. You're the one who understands this reference. That's why we don't
have sugar for breakfast anyway. I hope your next endless space video bumps. We're vicious today.
How hilarious it would be if Colin you had merch and then it just the quote is one of them like
strength is stored in the palette strength is stored in the pancreas.
Anyway it's time it's it's now time for the results of the beginner section.
An interesting bunch of answers so we're going to go back to the first question which was let me
just scoot back up. So the first one was what was the unique rank for the master the first master
of the black Templars and thus the chapter master henceforth. Eli put high marshal Colin put high
marshal and so did everyone put high marshal so you all get a point well done. You've all got a
point. I might deserve less than that because I edited it to grand marshal. I put high marshal
first and then second guessed myself but I clearly shouldn't have. I saw that first so I'm willing to
let that slide because again I've not I've not looked at it since you've edited it. All right I
will take that kind of point. There you go. I literally looked at it and went oh notch that's a
point so yeah would have accepted dank marshal too. Would have accepted screaming bigot but oh well
anyway. Yeah not wrong. Anyway so question number two was an interesting one. Sigismund is noted as
the first to utter this famous line from Warhammer so we're going to go down the list. So starting
with so Eli put for the emperor for the emperor or the emperor protects which is I'm afraid
incorrect. Hal put for the emperor incorrect but Colin put there is only war which is correct.
He was speaking to Taric Torgaddon and Gett and um
Arveolaucon from the lunar wolves and he said in the far future there will be only war because he
didn't believe the space marines would ever find peace even this this is before the Horus heresy
even happened and he was like now mate we're going to be fighting forever what are you talking about
painting and making Lego shut up get your sword we're going to go to war. Oh my god I had that voice
act today as well. I know yeah. Oh the shame. And you know he's a real one dude. You know what's
really good about that now Colin's a point above how brilliant. Absolutely poppin. Oh
so question number three was during the siege of terror.
Sigismund would be given a unique title. Eli put emperor's champion.
Hal put emperor's champion and unfortunately Colin put the black sword which is incorrect it was
the emperor's champion was the title I was looking for. Black sword is what he was using wasn't it.
It was yes. So I see what you did there but um I'm afraid it's tripped you up. I thought I
thought I read somewhere that people started calling him that but I guess even if that is true
that's not a title that's just kind of something they started calling him. I mean it's interesting
with like when he became the high marshal he carried in the sword of the high marshal into
battle but he also had the black sword which he didn't use until he did his final battle.
But he was he was kind of known as oh the the black templar and the black sword but to a lesser
extent but his official title was the emperor's champion. So I'm afraid that means the scores on
the doors at the end of the first section the beginner section everyone has two points isn't
that interesting. In that case call me a call me a black templar because I'm about to be turned
into a screaming bigot if that was the only war question was totally intermediate bro I don't
know that was you haven't seen the intermediate section here don't say that it's also the most
famous warhammer quotes to the tagline of every book true yeah maybe true perhaps true. I was
trying to think who actually came up with for the emperor was that's jago seven no actually it was
a knight lord wasn't it. Is that one of those things that read origin like just for the emperor
that's not the emperor it's just yeah that's just something I know that was the emperor's children
that thing wasn't it. I don't I think everyone just said yeah I just say that I'm I'm sure there's
I'm sure there's a 500 page like wiki and the star wars or yeah on the star wars wiki that goes
into the exact person who first said just like the simulations and battle for him to
name character with 500 blocks each of the knobs on darth vader's suit do
brilliant okay moving swiftly on star wars legion is a good game sorry it wasn't I was
thinking of like glock it glock shit oh yeah can you explain that to people who don't know
what I'm talking about oh it's uh it's making fun of like star wars fans who see a character who
was like in a background scene of like revenge of the sith and only that and then he shows up
in something else and then they lose lose lose it which I guess to be fair is is is most every like
fan base to be fair when something like that happens it's just star wars has so much behind it
that like when you see someone like it happens all the time because there's so much star wars
I mean I know a lot of weird characters like do you know the the name of the little guy who's
always by jab of the hutside the little rodent guy is a name his name why am I saying that
his name is salacious crumb what no way no brother if you want the real question is do you know the
music the cantina band is playing I'm hand solo the genre is jizz
oh my gosh open your ears everyone here comes the anyway
anyway we haven't even got to the middle part yet and we're already on anyway
on sigismund's episode this is horrendous the heritage
anyway are we ready for the intermediate section before we delve deeper into the
gravity yes I'm ready to get copyright struck because I just hummed the cantina song
I'll just miss a strike in your house right now george lucas in the air strike the mouse is in my
house yeah anyway right um so elia you said it was intermediate you haven't here we go you're
you're in for a treat with these questions in the intermediate section so question number four
uh sigismund wrote a book of verses to extol his wisdom of the following three examples which is
the correct verse so the first one is you wield the emperor's will as your sword with it purge his
enemies second verse you carry the emperor's will as your torch with it destroy the shadows and the
third verse you carry the emperor's will as your shield with it endure the darkness um for brevity
if you want to say sword torch or shield that's probably the easiest way to send me the answer
this guy holy holy here we go I've got uh I've got oh that was very quick you've all sent your uh
results in it's the creeps that can only come with either knowing you're completely right or not
having any idea and just winging it yeah um okay here's another one uh question number five let
me just jot this down um it is rare for nastates to injure a primarch corswain of the dark angels
would impale conrad curse through the spine with his sword our fuza narik of the word bearers would
aid in the assassination of vulcan even though it didn't stick uh yet which primarch would sit
mark would sigismund injure as general that is that is the wrong one
I'm gonna say uh ferris manners because he hurt his feelings oh he hurt his feefees oh no ferris
manners got a lot of boys I miss you ferris we all miss ferris here's it is it raise your glass to
ferris everyone is there like um is that one possible answers in the quiz there's a possible
duel in front of ferris andy uh maybe okay then i'll shut my mouth shut your mouth hal stop winning
um okay it's now time for question number six now this one uh i think is is it going to be a tuffy
and it might be a guessy so i'll see how we go but uh for reference this is from sigismund's own book
uh for his appointment to the rank of first captain and leader of the templar brethren of the imperial
fists sigismund would be tested by facing his kin including a dreadnought in a trial of combat to
prove himself worthy how many templars did he defeat in battle oh i i will say it's i'm not gonna
it's not one of those answers where the number is like uh anything other than as it doesn't end with
anything other than a zero or a five let's say just so you're not gonna put like 71 it's like no
i'm gonna go divisibles by it ends in zero or it ends in five comments answered if you've been
drinking you can take a lot more people but you get either shut down really quickly or you'd have
you become unstoppable yeah it's like um it's like a fight there like a group fight and one guy who's
clearly the most wasted who started it gets knocked out first and then he has like a second wind and
he gets up again he didn't become i didn't hear no bell said sigismund you're not locked in here
with me locked in here with me um we have all the answers in so this is an interesting one um so
let's start with number four so question number four was sigismund wrote a book of verses i
mentioned he said uh you carry the emperor's sword or your or you carry the emperor's torch or shield
uh so elie put sword how's the second shield and uh yeah so this is from his verses and uh
colin also put sword so two swords and a shield and i'm afraid you're all incorrect it i wanted
to ask where you can change it is this toy you carry the emperor's will as your torch with it
destroy the shadows that's from the versus the sigismund because i don't i mean the shield one
makes more than i think the sword makes the most thematic sense yeah that's i was a sneaky i was
like torch is a bit too like vague i know they burn witches which is fun but it's like it's like
you know i azura by azura i'm the fan no no put that torch away get a sword like a real man like
now i'm gonna put a sword in the shield and then he dug blood i did think it was shield just because
it's imperial fist so they are the shield of terror like all that stuff i and obviously i think that's
actually been said by someone else i'm pretty sure like i am the shield in the darkness i mean i know
the grey knights they say um i am the tip of his spear i am the sword in his hand i am the shield
against the darkness etc very space marine-esque there's usually like a change of life i am the
coffee in his travel bag i am the compass in his apps in his phone so he doesn't get lost you know
that kind of saying tip of the spear second coolest cutscene in video game history oh that's true
very true lots of warthogs uh very fun um and question number five was uh it is rare for an
astartes to injure a primarch which primarch did uh did sigismund shank so to speak so starting off
with uh eli eli put sigismund wounded fulgrim in brackets in big bold letters sad uh how also put
fulgrim and collin put fulgrim i can confirm you all got that one correct uh during the siege of
terrarium the imperial fists were facing the emperor's children and then if i remember this
correctly fulgrim's just like wah ha ha ha i am having a great amount of time he just goes out
and like sigismund's just like driven his sword and his hip or something he's like get and he
like swaps him aside and it's like i just love the idea of sigismund just like charging in quietly
and just going and then yeah he's swatted away like a fly and then roguedorn's like he over
overestimates his his his skill outstrips his ability or something like that you're like oh
dawn oh he's gonna die and then the writer said no thanks and then all the ones who call and he
just you can't have you can't have dorn die because he dies later on does he or is he just
still out there building sand castles alpharius number two killed him i mean i mean he didn't
no dorn chainsawed alpharius is skulling let's let's not let's not pretend the alpha legion
maybe omega is still alive maybe yeah that's right buddy and maybe omegon is actually alpharius
because they swap their names we know them all i hope i hope alpha legion lore writers explode
it does make sense though no it doesn't no they swap it makes sense in the same way when i go
actually like when i don't i i hate that i hate the alpha legion
anyway um it's now and and number six was uh when being appointed as the leader of the templar
brethren how many templars uh did sigismund beat in combat so starting off again with eli eli put
uh a gif with will smith pointing out a 10 with gatorade on it so very cool gift but
uh i'm afraid 10 10 is real 10 is a bit low it's incorrect it's a bit low um
uh we'll go with colin next colin he put 50 a bit more but i'm afraid 50 is incorrect i'm afraid the
correct answer which how gave me was 200 templars what he fought 200 and one of them was a dreadnought
and he he basically like coup de grace ripped out bits of the dreadnought so it didn't function then
dawn was like yes that i think you're a good pick for first captain's like you think um which is
pretty cool um bit of an arbitrary number though that'll do you just like oh that'll divide you
and our 200s fun good old good old good old writing uh how to make a character look cool
and then he killed 500 bad guys and had all of the sex and then everyone and then the ladies
brought out their babies and they held them aloft and they cried and they threw rose petals and you
know it's like that when that kid at school is like oh i got in a fight the other day and the
guy was seven foot tall and um i i got him in a choke hold and then i threw him over my shoulder
and he was seven foot tall and then his dad came into the park and i punched him in the nuts and
he's like oh yeah you did mate did you oh very impressive i think um the two i think i'd heard
the 201 thing before because sigismund's like uh personal book i've had a little uh little read
through damn that's is cool he it does make him actually as much as we've all like crapped him a
bit earlier he actually does have some character to him so people who are listening are like oh man
it doesn't seem that impressive and to be fair he is like injured in the fight he doesn't just go like
jojo jojo's bizarre adventure and be like actually you fell into my trap and i beat all of you without
taking a like breaking a sweat like no he he gets like pretty badly wounded but he does it anyway
and that's pretty cool um so yeah with the intermediate section done scores on the doors
we have elai at three points colin at three points and hal is at four points he's getting away with
it we can't keep getting away with this i don't like sand it's coarse and rough and it gets
everywhere okay um if you for the last questions were tricky these are gonna break you oh good
oh god good this this is good good thank you thank you uh my disclosure is immeasurable and my days
were okay so it's time for question number seven are we ready yes okay so sigismund as a child
would live among a band of orphans during the era of the unification of god assaulted by a gang of
predatory raiders sigismund would defend the orphans using a metal bar what was the name of
the gang that assaulted them oh god okay this is not fair it isn't but it's my quiz
and to be fair i must say i said this earlier i don't know if i said this beforehand sigismund's
like a really cool character but lore wise it's kind of slim pickings like the minutia is kind
of all there is other than that it's like i could just say um what was the color of his armor you
know oh yellow and it's a bit obvious and you know he's one of those characters who has really cool
lore but he's only got a bit of it and oh god i've just seen how's answer so sorry um uh i don't
know what that means elai but i will try my best uh just waiting on colin i just full on let you
know i i went for funny because i actually don't know and please forgive us all if people are
listening at this point also please please give us names of the gang in the chat that will be
funny ones i went for a mediocre reference oh no i don't know what it means so i'm dreading
i'm saying oh well it's actually not that bad oh okay as long as i don't get caught i'm fine with it
oh no uh all done colin uh no i'm gonna change my answer to so we're sick with it
it's not right i'll shut up you're already winning yeah yeah i've really not given a serious
answer so just stick with your guns fortify the comment people even start okay i mentioned that
siege fortify siege fortify siege fortify anyway for the iron warriors fans get annoyed uh time for
question number eight so sigismund would be the sorry i said all two of them if portrayable has
100 fans i'm one of them has 20 fans i'm one of them for two i have zero fans i'm dead
now now that's bullying right we're gonna move on before we get people going like no
pud rubber's the coolest in the comments okay let's keep going that person isn't real
question number eight sigismund would be the youngest imperial fist of stardies to be inducted
into the templar brevran but what was the name of the weaponsmith of the templars who had meant to
him in his early years oh i will give a point for his name or his title oh god this is actually
like proper expert now because i don't have a single clue they don't call it expert for nothing
and i remember your alpha legion quiz to this day how so my vengeance was never stated that was
literally i know and it was the first one and you set the tone and now you get what you deserve
this is an expert question uh no is that your answer you like yes um okay i i like it
i'm thinking of a very let's see i say a very old film but some people watching this be like
i remember that when that came out uh colins but something else
oh dear i'll have i'm gonna save that so i can put it in the edit
right click he's already made a meme is he he's posted a meme version 2.0 came out today baby
oh no it's gonna be how what have you done you know the reference though right
oh god okay question nine let's get this over with uh question nine of the expert section
um sigismund's black sword is one of the most iconic weapons in the warhammer 40k setting
and there are words etched into its blade named after its his original power sword gifted by
roguel dawn for his appointment as first captain of the seventh legion what are the words on the
on the black sword so this is both what's actually inscribed on the side of the blade
but also the name of sigismund's sword before he got uh the black sword i think i remember
okay colin that'll do um
right okay this has been a very interesting uh i feel like i'm close i don't think i've got it
but i'm in the same ballpark i'm not just waiting on eli alcon's not even the same stadium god
okay you like everyone else is playing football i'm i'm i'm what i'm playing nba
playing nba 2k
okay right that game gonna actually get good never that's the whole point it used to be okay
where do i begin uh okay uh so results of the expert section so let's start off with question
seven uh what was the name of the gang uh that attacked sigismund and his band of orphans during
the unification of terror uh eli put the mr gang with a gif of the power rangers um the mr gang
or the mr gang mr gang it looks like to me that is more fun okie dokie um how put jizz gibblers
well done oh good i love that's that's that's the cantina band yeah oh dear and uh colin put phase
connect very good um sponsored by phase phase b of orphans apparently in the universe not actually
me i'm real life but don't see me shout out to all my phase connect fans out there
i'm representing your degeneracy i'm not angry i'm just disappointed you should really be used
to it by now no let me be clear this isn't about you specifically colin i mean all of you
how could i in any way possible be pleased with that answer i always put a giblet but i forgot
what a giblet is just like a like would you jib someone in a video game they just exploded
giblets are like when you're when you're harvesting a carcass they're like the bits of meat that aren't
like a breast or a fire isn't it a structure a giblet or something it's it's the stuff that
gets turned into hot dogs stuff like grinders yeah yeah enjoy your chicken testicles in a nice
battered shell like yum yum anyway come to mcdonald's for the finest great f meat
hashtag it is a restaurant we swear like no it's not all right question number eight uh
sigismund would be the youngest imperial fist of start he's to be inducted into the temple our
brevran what was the name of his mentor uh elai just put a gif of uh ryan gosling from blade runner
just rubbing his eyes with his hands and then screaming and getting up uh you're not ryan
gosling dude he's just like me for real for real just like me man how put i have nipples greg can
you milk me can you not even try it's from the film meet the parents and nothing to get that
oh my with ben stiller are you asking if i've seen a movie are you asking if i've seen a movie
true shout to people people in the chat right now can you mention please type the films you
think colin has seen because it won't be that many oh man dirty dancing and a lot of bullying
of colin today forest i've been told not to win and uh speaking of colin colin his answer was
david martinez uh which is incorrect uh the answer was chrome the fuck up
and then the gif of the chrome person saying chrome the fuck up yeah cyberpunk is out it updated
it's good now i swear wake the fuck up samurai correct answer was apius or api s the father of
dreadnoughts he was the first person in the imperial fist to be interred in a dreadnought
and he was the uh master of the smith of the templars for a long time he was the one who also
got like ganked during the 200 versus one beat him up that sigismund part took in is that when
they put him in the dreadnought or was he the dreadnought he was the dreadnought he was already
in a dreadnought he wasn't his mentor when he was a dreadnought but then during the great crusade
he was the first to get injured badly enough so he was known as the father of dreadnoughts which
is like a little little bit of imperial fists law just a little tidbit yeah totally knew that
he's not right i don't know when you turn not so than right then bjorn um so rounding off the
expert section we have sigismund's black sword has some words inscribed on the side what are
the words elie just put a gif of steve from minecraft two of them with the swords on their
groins arms in the air hacking away at each other so i don't know it was like it was like the fifth
gift when i looked up sword what how magical is that yeah i don't know what to say if i'm honest
uh this is a visual representation of the siege of terror here you go done is that like a minecraft
art version of a cockfight um empress children battle dome any well it's so profound and yet
oh i know i know what i'm looking at i don't know why i'm gonna go to colin next because
colin just put what is inscribed on the side of the sword racial slurs um which is in it's yeah
but it's it's incorrect but i see where he was going um unfortunately how got it right he put
imperator which is what's on the side of the sword that's the name of the sword roguedorn first gave
to sigismund before he got the black sword so you get a point how much to my honest annoyance
yes that was so sorry i'm so sorry i mean if you look at the model of him the forge world model
you can see it on his blade and and i think some of the artwork it's there as well i think it's
something like light of the emperor in latin or something like that um something like that very
cool um i just guess scores on the doors before we get to the last question is uh elie has three
points colin has three points and how has five over i want to apologize so over now uh i will say
we're coming up to the bonus and this bonus question has multiple points up for grabs right um
so i and here's the thing um there are to my knowledge there are five potential answers
so potentially guys you could beat hal assuming he doesn't get as many answers right as you guys do
um but with that said are we ready for the bonus question yes okay sigismund has bested many
venerated combatants in both jewels of honor and death list every name the starties of the rank of
captain or higher that sigismund has bested in combat name them gg gg yeah just give me the names
just give me the names damn this is actually very difficult um well my knowledge there's five
i can think of i don't uh
uh there's people in the siege things remember they have to be a captain or higher
well in an effort to distract hal uh would everyone like a would you rather question
yes so this this one's uh pretty simple uh would you rather uh live in chicago for a year
not that one uh or hang on i'm not done or you have to live in night city for a year uh
cyberpunk town uh but if you choose that one at the end of that year you get to bring whatever
augmentations you get back into the real world oh oh elia you go first night city but i wouldn't
have any augmentations baby no screw that i'm here in flesh i'm i'm either coming out looking
like rebecca from cyberpunk or looking like adam smasher oh what was the question again like would
you would you have augmentations from cyberpunk or no would you rather live in chicago for a year
or would you rather live in uh night city for a year but you get whatever augmentations you get
like night city i i'd live in chicago i'd be all right no i'm going to night city
i'm coming out chromed up i mean to be fair i did i did study uh at uh university of bedfordshire
in uk and i lived in a little town called luten for three years fun fact about luten in the uk
stabbing capital of the country so yeah hey damn i don't know i don't know turn down doesn't it
i don't know that's what he was doing before he became a warhammer channel
channel just evading knives like go away
um so i've had colin's answer i've had howe's answer let's have a look at these oh no you can't
put that guy how i'm not gonna accept that i know but uh right we're dead too i don't know their
name but that's as that's as best i can do i gave all the real answers they might be wrong but i
tried i just put one person called him because he's him he did that twice oh i know future gohan
just waiting on elie um just tally these up while i got a moment oh how oh no really getting on my
nerves these days i just i i read warhammer books almost as much as i think the issue is
colin and i the stuff that we know really well is the quizzes that we run
and then andy's quizzes are horse hairsy stuff that colin and i don't know
and then so we so we lose three out of four quizzes because the ones that we win are the ones that
we're running uh yeah what you're saying is that whenever howe wins for the next five
wins in a row he needs to donate his his win stud to one of you guys i understand completely
we do a tabletop quiz all tabletop questions yeah if you guys do uh one about yeah the tabletop i
will not win i'll just be like yeah that's what gave me my winning streak at the beginning
i need these table top questions back bro i infuriated i included i included a few table
top questions in my last one i did i did yeah they were bad tabletop questions because they
want the elder i've got all these i've got all the answers in um and it's been an interesting
round so uh without further ado um let's start with eli eli put khan the sons of horus guy who
gets his head chopped off in a millisecond in war warhawk lon lokan typhus sevetar erinor
sevetar eribus lol in brackets i'm just saying characters at this point maybe they are right um
i'll give you a point for khan i'll give you a point for eidolon but i can't give you a point
for the sons of horus guy who gets his head chopped off i cry bro he's like a side character
come on he's a side character but he's in loads of the books he's little horus it is little horus
is a little little horus axaman yeah i know a character from the horse it was a random guy
wasn't it i think there's no way it was a little horny i thought what setting are we talking about
because they all have names yeah in the siege of terror um axaman gets his hand cut off by
sigismund during a fight he runs away and then he gets um decked by lokan later on you know that's
not who i'm talking about that's not who i'm talking about no i know i know who elia is talking about and i
i thought of that guy too but i don't think he's a captain he doesn't have the name they do
nope warhammer is just as bad with the coluptial moments of star wars just not as many people know
about it was he a captain bro i don't he was he was like in charge of his truce oh were you talking
about the guy in charge of the um not the just air and the other ones the uh the reavers i think
i know he mean i'll have to search for his names uh but anyway how put sevatar khan sons of horus
guy eidolon iron hands baddie i'm only going to give you two for that so one for khan one for eidolon
and not so well i'm going to get into that uh and then colin said khan which is a point
lucas garrot lokun typhus i'm afraid none of those are correct i tried so sevatar
won his duel because he cheated he was the only one sigismund didn't beat because he he
doesn't he like shove sand in his eyes or something and then like goes i win it's like uh
you didn't fight with honor and so everyone was like sevatar won but he didn't win honorably
in the sigismund book it's because they've been fighting basically sigismund is wondering why
he's not winning because he's usually he when he fights he's like i can see the moment coming like
many steps ahead and every time that happens sevatar seems to like weirdly countery like
what was he like psychic or something as in like not as like he's has psychic powers yeah
doesn't and eventually um sevatar is about to lose like then he feels he's about to lose it so he
headbutts him and so even though the things where pass the one oh my gosh i'm so tilted right now
they say they say in because obviously they're all watching it around him they say that sevatar
says oh i won but then he ends up but then everyone around him he says oh you lost because you cheat
so he gets to score so sevatar gets when logan does it to lucas lucas is the bad guy when it
gets done the sevatar or when he gets done the oh my gosh that's because we know what lucas
you all know what lucas turns into oh my gosh this is so cringe i'm so grumpy now what the heck
i've never even heard of this everyone harps on lucas so much for that logan deal elia just leaves
the discord chat in frustration brutal acts of violence very soon
it's a weird one though it's the one where they say like technically sigismund won it because
sevatar got disqualified but then it's like if you ask the night lords they'd be like did you
really win if you won by technicality and it was first blood yes and so yeah if you're playing
it imagine if you're playing a wormatonament and then you get first place but then you had you were
like cheated with dice they would just go when they punch you in the face it's just like it just
like tilt the table up and then your pieces slide off the table like oh that's knocked out of the
game like what the no you idiot this is the whole scandal with the guy they think they put something
up his uh rectum to like cheat in the chest the chest the vibrating needle piece yeah yeah with um
the channel what's it i did a thing very good stuff great did you guys see the the warhammer
tournament that uh some guy was using weighted dice so we tried to flush him down the toilet
but it didn't work oh my gosh i feel bad for the people that had to grab them out of the toilet to
confirm they were weighted that's who i really feel bad for average warhammer competitive tournament
i can confirm they are heavy and now they are also i was gonna make another joke when you see
i think me me and elad did both put sevatar right is the consensus yeah that doesn't it's a no
content does it count well i'm i'm i was just guessing i didn't even know they fight i don't
know yeah and to be honest like if you both get it correct anyway it's not going to change your
score difference so yeah um but the ones i put down were yes khan is a pretty obvious one
eidolon sigismund like chucks him over a wall during the siege of gerry's like i'm winning and
then he just goes and he goes and he falls off and it's quite funny um i would have also accepted
horus axamand as mentioned i would have also accepted jubal khan the uh the master of the
hunt of the white scars because they had an honor jewel and he lost and everyone was really impressed
because they were like white scars are the coolest legion everyone's like i know right he's pretty
good and then the other one i would have had is in sigismund's book where roguel dawn and ferris
manus have a champion each for an honor jewel and the iron hand is called fos t h o s and he also
has bested yep he's just in it for one bit of a book and then he's gone and he has to abase
himself and be like i'm sorry ferris i am weak he's like you're you're damn right you're weak go in
your bedroom i want to rant about that because iron hands on the tabletop should have some of
that heresy era goodness they they use zwei hand as iron hands yeah which is so and they have like
their own special terminator called iron fathers where they're just essentially like robots they've
replaced so much themselves and they are whenever that people around them they are actually like
terrified just to be near him because they're like they're inhuman monsters oh god tabletop and they
and they give um she she barn can uh is it she barn khan they gave him a swine and he's like i'll
cut the front of axeman's face off and then he stitches it back on he's like guys do i still look
cute and the rest of the sons of whores like oh dear not so much horrors looking anymore yeah um
but it it has come to that fateful time everyone for the final results are we ready hit us yeah
okay in third place with a respectable four points we have colin well done colin
uh yeah i think you did pretty good um good good um it was it was a shame about the uh the black
sword instead of emperor's champion um if it had got that one you would have been tied with eli
because eli got five points but i'm afraid yet again how does one with seven points
oh yeah i think colin i'm crew should all take a trip to war amor world and break hal's kneecaps
you got the region first i think colin and i need to coordinate our quizzes so i'll do all the elder
quizzes and he'll do all the and i really don't be curious first hal i'm not that short
uh
i'm eye level with your kneecaps bro yeah bro like you're not helping yourselves against the
short kings we were playing and this is completely off topic but it's funny and short related in dnd
i was i don't remember the context but i was like um i'm i'm shorter than you i'm pretty sure
and the guys i was like no dude i'm like freakishly short i'm like down to your knees and i was like
how short are you i'm five four bro i'm five four in real life i'm five four
oh man
eli's also built like gotrick he's got trick he's canadian got trick just wind him up and let him
lose tandrick as we call them man even in class today i was telling my buddy because we were doing
our height and send him using land five four bro he's like five four no way like freak man come on
it's not that is it that hard to believe is there i wouldn't i wouldn't just use the size of your
biceps and he's like oh he's pretty he's like five four please shall i get you a box
oh you have no idea how many times it's been said to me oh every event ever i wouldn't go making
a canadian angry i know what they got up to in world war one yeah but apparently mfs don't know
about none of me vimmy ridge nobody if you live in the rash if you live in the rash be nicer to your
canadian tourists just throwing that out there you won't you're speaking french because of us
i mean technically my people helped found canada so i don't know he was the line of lineage and
we say a right all right hey yeah all right yeah hashtag shocking
and he's fine it's fine i'm not salty throw the tea in the harbor for this
oh me when i burn down the white house all right buddy it's our one win okay it's our one win
against the u.s i gotta take it i got a war of canadian independence with sir charles sir
general brock who was from guernsey who fought for canada there you go there's a war for
independence i think it's that one was it a war or was it like a scuffle
i i'm gonna have to google it there was no war of canadian depend what no there wasn't
you just asked nicely and they got it we're canadian
i only war in the capture of detroit uh
yeah was the war queen's and health's queenston heights that wasn't canadian independence
oh something like that i think it was negotiated like it was just yo can we have it like yeah sure
yeah after world war one we were after balling so hard in the war you know we we just got it
anyway that was a fun quiz wasn't it a long way from the jizz comments to them
we've been distancing ourselves all this time and you've brought it to me my head all day bro
oh my gosh uh well anyway hungry so enjoy the sigismund quiz i'm i'm ravenous
i'm hungry i mean i had fun uh i enjoyed that was a good quiz it was fun and i just wish i knew
more for his hair is the lord i don't want to read all the books so i like the i'm i'm listening to
xeno's books right now man yeah the law be popping though boys yeah i have read i've read like 20 of
them and that's like a quarter or a horse heresy is just marvel for warhammer and that makes me
i don't i don't like thinking about it it's ending though good yeah and it's time for 500 scouring
novels yeah give me old world not gonna happen buddies did you see that the old world models
that they've shown are the only new ones that we're getting no yep you're making that up
nope it's it's it's that's maybe i'm wrong but that's the information i have been told
they were doing keyslev what happened to that uh uh hey james maybe it's maybe just maybe it's
just for brittonia and tomb kings that that's the case but still there's a lot of old goofy looking
tomb kings just play middle earth bros just play middle earth everyone listening to this just go
play middle earth please it's buy more models actually don't because if gw starts paying
attention to it then they'll release new rules and ruin the game so maybe maybe we shouldn't
you know what i said don't buy it don't do it don't buy it use army with all that ranting though
so i want to say thank you guys so much for listening and for watching um obviously if you
want to is it any other subjects slash topics you want us to cover make sure you comment them below
because we will happily do them maybe we'll even do a tabletop fiend one next time because quite
a few of us uh do enjoy that the game and uh without being said hope you guys all enjoyed
um sorry for the jizz comments and we'll see you guys next time i'm not
uh peace farewell love you everyone
you