I'm gonna start off, Korn, your honor. He sucks. The blood god is a bland deity.
He literally is a walking contradiction. He supposedly represents honor,
but yet his worshipers slaughter the weakened defenseless. How can one be honorable and yet
not care for when the blood flows? I'm sorry, that makes no sense. Slaneš targets elves. Cringe.
Leave them alone.
Hello everyone and welcome to another episode of the Versus series on lore crimes. Today
I'm proud to announce the return of the one and only Deadlyfs from the Dark Gods.
He's finally done being cringe on his honeymoon. We're happy to have him back. And
less fortunately, it is now Andy's turn to take a vacation. He is what you call a workaholic.
So the Rememberser will not be hindered this episode, but that's okay because it's a 2v2.
And since I'm once again not outnumbered 3 to 1, I'm much more confident filling this episode
with Eldar and Vtubers. So welcome everyone. Oh god. Welcome to hell. I had the perfect meme
prepared just for that moment. I didn't realize I might lose on the meme side of this. Oh god.
It's only one meme I saw today. You guys got the memes locked down, hell. If I can say anything
going into this, I would be wary of Eli. But I will not be partaking in this Versus. After the
last two, I brutalized Hal and Eli. It was a resounding Colin victory. I said Eli, Hal and
Andy. Eli has not been here yet. I goofed already. So it will be my turn to judge. And Hal will be
taking the corner in the blue corner. The Chaos Gods, the Ruinous Powers. I'm Lovecrafting Gods.
Oh my god. It's not going well. This is what happens when Andy is gone.
How will we... Let me restart. Eli will be defending the Ruinous Powers, the Chaos Gods,
the Great Four. I hope to hear a little bit of the horgrat, but I'm not getting my fingers crossed
over it. And Hal, as he said, because I completely flubbed who was who, will be defending in the red
corner the Lovecrafting Gods, Asshet, Cthulhu, Shub, you can't say that word. Yeah, I got the scour on that.
And and perhaps most devastatingly of all, Mr. HP Lovecraft's cat. I was gonna... No, I had that joke already.
He said it. He said it.
And how about we'll start with Eli, since you're defending the the Warhammer side of things and
this is a Warhammer channel. Why don't you go first? How do you feel about today's argument?
I feel pretty good. Like you said, this is a Warhammer channel. We're not going to let no
other universes in on this stuff. There's no way we're going to lose that, right? So
Chaos Brothers, stay winning. I love Talos. What? Talos one lost time. I do support Eli's fervor,
however, I have so far only been the non-Warhammer side. So I support the fervor, but I can't support
the substance. That being said, I'm always angry when I'm thinking about chaos and I'm hoping Eli,
you'll bring that energy to the table. Sounds good, buddy. Hell yeah. How almost? How? How
are you feeling? How passionate are you about this argument? How do you think Lovecraft's
going to do here? Well, I've just got the better arguments already. So, um, I don't, I honestly
don't even need to say anymore. That's literally it. I've got this. It's in the bag.
Well, it's quite the interesting battle here because on the one hand, Warhammer, the Chaos Gods,
obviously more familiar with our audience, but Cthulhu and all the Lovecraft fellas,
much, much more wider, broad cultural appeal. So who's going to win the niche nerds or the broad
nerds?
I have something funny to say and it did not come up. Nevermind. This is already bad.
Oh man. Well, we will figure this out later. In the meantime, gentlemen, are you both ready
for a nice clean, dirty metal? All right. Eli, I'm going to start the talk, uh, the timer now.
Uh, are you ready? Yes. All right. Your time begins now.
Thank you, sir. Let me tell you about the primordial truth, the natural way of the universe
and the beginning of all things that are holy. Uh, the four Chaos Gods were created by the
natural, let's remember natural emotions and actions of the people of the universe.
Slaanesh is a little bit different, but she's special. We'll talk about her later. Maybe they
fulfill your needs and they're perfect. They're perfect for you. No matter who you are. Uh, if
you're an angry guy, then you can find Mr. Corn, but also it's not all about being angry. Uh, he
can, you know, take your anger and shape it into something better. But we'll talk about that in a
little bit as well. I want to hear some fish stuff first. Um, each God gives you some unique,
wonderful blessings, we'll say, um, that are very, they're very powerful, very nice, but you don't
have to worship a single one either. You can pledge your allegiance to all four of them and broader,
because there's more than four. Spoiler alert. Uh, they watch you. They are pleased with their
servants and they will reward you for your service. Some of them go as far as even loving you. If we
have grandfather and Urgo here, his grandfather for a reason, because he truly loves his servants.
He brings you wonderful happiness and he will reward you greatly through all of your struggles.
We have corn who's strong. He's powerful are about all about martial pride slashes about perfection
and also love and joy and good times. And Zech is all about knowledge and the pursuit of knowledge
and sorcery and magic. If you're into that kind of thing, they have persevered throughout the 40 K
universe throughout the millennia. Unlike things like the old ones who have all died out, like the
fools they are, there were, they were false gods. One can say the Kitan, they didn't make it either,
but the chaos guys are still going strong. They're always going to be around. They're playing the
great game forever. Who doesn't like games overall chaos is a good time. We'll get into the needy
gritty in a little bit. I think I want to hear a fish man's arguments first. No, you're cutting
out early. You do a perhaps. All right. That's a quite some confidence from Eli on a on round one.
It was a, it was a solid, a nice introduction to the chaos gods, what they're about.
At least a couple of them, the big hitters and how, how would you like to follow this up?
Well, your time starts already. So your honor, I'm not here to talk about any Lovecraftian cats,
talk about Lovecraftian horror, also known as the Cthulhu mythos, which is home to a pantheon of
horrific, terrifying deities that are simple human notions of gods. And it just twists them into
monsters beyond comprehension. Our little minds cannot even fathom them, let alone even perceive
their true forms. Eli gave us a little introduction on these chaos gods, you know,
little old Nurgle corn, you know, a bloated overweight man, a dark night, a little hermaphrodite,
how can I even say the word hermaphrodite form. All these are simple, trivial designs that speak
to a human touch, they are human ideas. The Lovecraftian gods are a twisted bulging eyes,
mucus covered flesh, tentacles, little sprinkle of oceanic life and influence in there, all those
great like deep sea creatures. And I only have to point out the iconic, the main man, the actual
sort of poster boy Cthulhu himself. He is a mix of disgusting and badass in one form. And I'll say,
whilst I'm still here, feel of the ocean, that as a concept, by the way, is so badass and actually
relatable rather than, oh, corn is not terrifying. He's just he's more like, ah, you know, you scare
and it's kind of like the end comes with a big axe. The actual ocean, I bet everyone here is
terrified of the ocean, you know, sitting helplessly there. That is essentially the feeling of these
Lovecraftian gods. The Lovecraftian mythos, these old gods have existed long, long before humanity,
long before we were even primordial soup and will continue to live long after our species has faded
from memory. And the fact that they also do not even care about humans, the chaos gods want to
corrupt us, they need us, the Lovecraftian gods, they don't even at times acknowledge humanity
because they are literally a speck in the existence and the timeline of the Lovecraftian universe.
To even, yeah, I'm still going, to even come in contact with these deities, you will never
leave unscathed. The chaos gods can be fought, held at bay for 10,000 years at Cadia, held at bay.
And if I remember actually, isn't Slaanesh imprisoned within the age of sigma setting?
Is that right, Colin?
As a warhammer, as a warhammer.
Yeah, well, no, Slaanesh, a god got imprisoned. Hmm, that sucks.
I'm afraid it is just a warhammer argument. It is still valid.
And the, yeah, so, god, how powerful are they? The Lovecraftian deities can only be survived
for a time as madness will come for you in the end. You will never get past them unscathed.
All you can do is pray that you do not gain their simple attention, otherwise you are screwed.
Your honor, I speak of Yog-Sothoth. The mass of glowing orbs, eyes and tendrils.
It is an omniscient god, meaning it can see all of time and space at once.
And there's also no secret, no knowledge hidden from it.
Yog-Sothoth is the gate, the pathway to all knowledge in the universe.
It knows whatever will be, whatever has been.
He is what Zech wishes he could be, and for he knows absolutely everything.
Even Colin's favorite VTubers, may I point out.
Slightly difficult to say.
Excessively sleepy.
This one is called Shub-Hmmm. I can't quite say the name because YouTube, your honor.
This is an enormous mass of extruding black tentacles, slime-dripping mouths.
It has short writhing goat legs. It's actually terrifying rather than just whatever
nurgle or corn is meant to look like.
This is what Slenesh wishes it could be.
A goddess of fertility that puts she who thirsts in her place,
with an actual form that is terrifying, rather than just being like,
oh, it's slightly humanoid, or trying to impersonate the superior race, the Eldar.
Yes, we're being biased.
Small creatures are continuously spat forth from this horrific thing,
and they monsters flood the universe. Not the warp, the actual universe.
Your honor, I speak of Nyarlathotep, the crawling chaos.
He is the greatest manipulator the universe can ever see.
He has no true form, and he only allows humanity to continue to exist
because he finds it as an interesting playground.
He is basically what Zeench wishes it could be, and is in fact,
Zeench is a rip-off of Nyarlathotep, who is the superior deity,
because he can actually win, rather than just being like,
oh, I got fooled, or it's some better plan in the end.
Your honor, I also speak of Hastur, the king in yellow.
Yes, a creature that's so iconic, its imagery still influences modern 40k,
with good old Konstantin Valdor.
He is a torture of the mind, invading dreams.
He is a master of his own dimension, Carcosa.
And I will finish on the fact that Lovecraftian gods are actually terrifying,
and you would, even in your own mind, your dreams, you're not free from them.
The Chaos Gods have to find some way to get to you.
The Lovecraftian gods are there, no matter what you do, and I'll leave it there.
No matter what you do, and I'll leave it there.
Alright, just about six minutes on the dot.
Hell yeah.
So Hal had definitely quite the argument to bring up.
He used his full time allotted.
I imagine there could have been more coming, but I'm afraid six minutes-
Oh, I've got more.
I've got more.
I'm not shocked to hear it.
But that being said, there's something to be said for the quiet confidence of Eli's brevity in his section.
I'll say, Eli, do you want more time on the next section?
I don't mind you donating.
We'll see how long it takes to get through this.
Since he graciously used his time briefly, we will see.
If you run a little bit long, we can extend it just a bit, as you go.
No problem.
So one question, I'll just do a broad question, both of you can answer.
Eli, I'll have you go first since you went first.
What is the broad appeal of the Chaos Gods?
And what I mean by that is, how easy, I guess, for like Red Word, is it for their cults to form, right?
Like, I know cults are a very strong running theme of each of these powers.
How easy is it for Chaos Gods for them to get a sort of a foothold in the mortal realm in such a way,
and just other general meanings?
How easy, I guess, I guess a better way to put it is,
how easy is it for the Chaos Gods to interact with the material world?
Very easy, very easy.
All you need is one little gateway to the human mind and soul, and bam, there you go.
They could also have their emissaries of demons.
They appeal to so much of the human psyche, and fit all the niches and roles that somebody would need.
It's hard to not want to turn to the Chaos Gods in the universe of Warhammer 40,000,
because they're just the perfect answer to so many issues.
And you don't go insane the moment that you start worshipping them either, which is a plus, I'd say.
And you get actual benefits.
You know, they have dental and healthcare and time off and vacation days.
Interesting, interesting.
Hal, how about yourself?
How easy is it for the Lovecraftian gods to get a foothold on the material world?
I know from preconceived biases, I will admit, I feel like it is a little bit easier for the
Warhammer Chaos Gods to get their grubby little claws into the foothold.
But that could very much just be, I've read much more Warhammer than I have Lovecraftian lore.
So, Hal, how easily can they get in?
Well, Your Honor, the Lovecraftian deities are not even locked away.
He said you need a gate.
The Lovecraftian deities don't even need a gate because they are actually in the material universe.
They are alongside, oh, humans are alongside them, shall I say.
And to, I mean, if they even wanted to talk to humans, the Chaos Gods can't stop themselves.
They are literally creations that have to corrupt.
They have no free will in that way.
If the Lovecraftian deities wanted to talk to humans, all they have to do is simply invade
their mind and their dreams.
Many of them could even, they don't even have to look at them or be near them.
They could just will it to be and they could have the humans under their control.
They only like to form cults, even though the smaller ones do like to form cults through some effort.
The larger ones don't even have to.
They can literally just will it into being.
Interesting. Okay. That's quite the point in their favor.
Yeah.
So it looks like Lovecraftians may have a little bit of an easier time.
But from my, at least again, my understanding, the Chaos Gods are, they do have built-in appeals,
as it were, where you don't need to just be looking for power so you start worshiping Haster.
It would appear that the Chaos Gods have some built-in reasons where people would turn to them.
So it looks like they both have advantages and disadvantages, if I were to say so.
Now, are the contestants ready for round two?
Ready.
I am.
Eli, your time starts now.
Epic. So why don't we talk about the blessings and worship of the Chaos Gods, which by the way,
is of your own free will to decide to follow the Chaos Gods. You're not forced into it,
and they don't have to seize their way into your minds just to get you.
So let's start with Slaanesh. She is the goddess or god of pleasure and accomplishment.
She brings you upon the journey of perfection, of arts and beauty, attention to details.
If you're an artist and you're looking for some more skill, just head over to Slaanesh
and she'll hit you up. If you like VTubers, Slaanesh will give you all the VTubers you
could ever want to. You can even be a VTuber. Slaanesh will help you get there. She helps you
be who you want to be and to pursue whatever you want perfectly in a beautiful, incredible aspect.
For Zeench, he's the lord of knowledge and power and sorcery and future seeing.
If you want to change the future a little bit, you don't like a
cataclysmic event that might happen to your planet, you can see that.
You can get rid of it. Everyone will be happy. Thanks, Zeench.
He'll also give you knowledge if you want to, you know, learn about all your
favorite animes and VTubers and whatnot. You'll have everything you could ever dream of
to be with those wacky individuals. You can have power in government if you want to take over and
rule your planet. Zeench is your guy. He'll get you there through political intrigue and genius.
He can get you some cool wacky spells that could maybe even heal, you know, heal some plagues that
are going on. There's some Zeench and Miracle Overlap there. Yeah, I think Zeench is pretty
cool. He's a changer of ways, you know, change is inevitable and Zeench embodies that and, you know,
if you have some problem with change, you can hit up Zeench and he'll help you go with the ebb and
flow of time and change. Nergal is a representation of the beautiful way of life. There's nothing more
natural than Mr. Nergal himself representing the life cycle of... It's just natural. It's just purely
natural. If you want to go the, you know, normal guy route, I think Nergal is a perfect opportunity
for you. If you really like your garden, he can also bring you lots of life. He can bring you
yourself eternal life. That seems like a pretty nice reward to me. Eternal life and bliss in this
eternal life. You're always happy. You always feel good. You'll never come down with bad disease.
You'll never feel pain. He takes all the pain and hardships away and he loves you. He's grandfather
Nergal. I don't know of any other gods in any other fictional universe can quite love you as
much as Mr. Nergal. He also brings you a very nice sense of duty and a purpose in life to spread his
plagues and his word throughout the galaxy. You never have to have any existential dread of not
knowing what to do. Nergal is there for you. Then we have Khorne, finally. If you want strength,
if you want to be a good athlete, just hit up Khorne. He'll make you a good warrior. He'll give
you tons of muscles, tons of athletic technique and honor and courage. You defend the weak if
you're one of Khorne's. You get great physical might reward and you can push the injustices of
your world. Khorne's awesome. Then you have some minor guys like Hashut and the great horned rat
and Malice. They will bless you in different ways. Malice is a pretty spooky guy but if you just
you just love chaos, Malice is your guy. Hashut will help you make things and build things. You
can forge things and the great horned rat is just, you know, nobody hates on the great horned rat.
Yes, yes. Get all the warpstone you want, all the psychic abilities you want. He's your guy.
Let's look at their champions. We have Lucius the Eternal. He's a perfect swordsman who literally
lives forever. You can't kill him and even if you thought you could then the writers just make a
way for him to come back so it's fine. That's what you can expect when you get with Slynessh at the
epitome of it. We have Khorne. He's the greatest warrior to ever live. His kill count is in the
millions. We have Typhus. He's invincible and implacable. He has the great gifts of Nurgle.
Nobody can get this guy. We have Armin who serves her supreme who has magic beyond might and knowledge
beyond comprehension. The chaos gods really like you and they're appealing and they're not going to
force you to worship them. You'll just come to it yourself and you don't have to be crazy to do it.
All right. I did add a minute on to make it four minutes rather than three. I know since you
were nice and brief in your opening argument. So that was I think a strong round by Eli.
Hal, are you ready for your three minutes? I wish you could hear me crack my knuckles
because I'm ready. All right, your time starts now. I'm just going to get over the small point
of being forced to do it. People willingly go to the Lovecraftian gods because you do get boons.
I should have said that earlier. You get magic. You get immortality, things like that. If you
really want to turn into fish people and swim to the bottom of the ocean, that's one of the smaller
benefits. But your honor, I have come to speak of the Lovecraftian deities as these ancient
creatures that barely even acknowledge humanity. The chaos gods are the creations of psychic,
sorry, the psychic remnant of sentient life. They are enslaved to act with only within those
parameters that psychic life gives them. Korn can't choose to do anything else outside of that.
He has to fight. He has to spill blood. He's basically a slave and the Lovecraftian deities
are completely free. They are sentient beings that allow themselves to do whatever they want
with the power that defies even the chaos gods. And the chaos gods, essentially, all they do
is seek to destroy themselves. Once sentient life dies out, which they're desperately trying to kill,
the chaos gods die with them. They're basically self-destructive in the end. That's all they are.
They're essentially a residual force given a little bit of form and you have to rely, as a
chaos god, upon mortals to enter the material universe. They're not even in the correct
universe at the moment. They have to use others because they're not strong enough to actually
exist within the material universe without fading away. And Lovecraftian deities' power has no such
limitations and they would literally, as I say, a bit of a cheap shot, but they would literally
obliterate the chaos gods if it came down to a fight. I think Angron, with the act, the power of
Korn with him, managed to destroy one planet with a swing. The Lovecraftian deities don't even
necessarily have to move a finger to have the exact same effect. They literally just don't care
to do it because they have no reason to interact with ants like us. And I will speak of my last
ace card here. I speak of Azathoth. He is a deity whose form could not even be described because it
does not fit within the confines of human language. It's so far beyond what Korn, Zinch or Sonesh could
ever imagine. The entire universe is simply a dream of Azathoth and if he wanted to wipe out the
chaos gods, he could simply do it by waking up. He has no such limitations as, oh, I need to go
through a warp portal. I need to use a human. At any point, he literally just awakens and then with
a snap of his fingers, the entire universe. Elias said the writing staff could write Lucius better
and make him immortal. Azathoth would eliminate the writing staff, so therefore, they have no power.
That's the writing staff's power, not even the chaos gods' power. That's right, mine is better.
Alright. Quite another strong rebel from hell. Now, I actually have three questions this round.
A general one for each of you and then one specifically for the both of you. So, start
with the general one. Now, as I said last time and as we know, they both are quite fond of cults,
or at least the universes are quite fond of giving these guys cults for their main forms of worship.
Rather than how easy it is for them to get a foothold and create these cults, I would like to ask,
how difficult is it for these cults to do their business, as it were, in their respective universes?
So, Eli, how difficult is it for a chaos cult to start growing, get some power,
to expand and all that such? How severe are the consequences to being found out?
I think it depends on where you live, probably, but if you live in the right places, it's very easy.
If you live in the wrong places, it's fairly hard, but still possible. If you're in a hive city,
there's plenty of places to hide and do your worship. Or if you're just born into it, then easy
peasy, right? If it's a chaos-owned planet, then you don't really have to worry about it. Or if it's
far from the Imperium's view and governors don't really care, don't really pay attention, it's
pretty easy peasy. On planets like those, the punishments might not be as severe because you
probably will have the governor on your side by the time he finds out. Unfortunately, in places
where the Imperium is strongest, punishments can be quite severe because they just don't understand,
they're afraid of the primordial truth, they fear of the blessings they give because they know
what's better than the emperors. Ooh, spicy. I imagine a chaos cult that started on
Holy Terra would not get very far. Probably not.
Hell, turn it over to you. Lovecraftian stories take place in our own, I guess Warhammer,
tactically 40k also, takes place in our own world, just a little bit in the future.
Lovecraft's much more closer to home, that being said, so how easy is it for these cults to
get their foot in the door, get things rolling, and what happens when they're found out?
Well, they luckily, pretty much within most of the Lovecraftian stories, funny enough,
most of the cults either get birthed through simply dreams, so the chaos gods, the Lovecraftian gods
don't even have to have a medium or like a sacrifice or something working on behalf of
like a chaos god, they can literally just go, ah, I picked that one, or I hear that one begging for
my name, and again, most of the stuff in Lovecraftian horror, most of the cults are always successful
as well, like even if they get found out, they still manage to work their way through the
door, they still manage to win in the end, no matter which story you look at, most of the time
the cult has actually succeeded in their plans, where I think most chaos cults get crumped, or
the Inquisition comes and annihilates the entire planet, so basically, no matter what kind of plot
was going along, it just like ends in nil disaster, the Lovecraftian ones are actually successful.
Alright, alright, and how destructive is it usually when they're found out, that being said?
What do the mortal authorities respond with, generally?
Should I go first on that one?
I think.
No, I thought I was just asking you.
Oh, I can go first if you want.
Well, you said it, Eli, we kind of know how the Imperium usually responds to chaos cults,
the world is now an asteroid.
Well, luckily, because of the knowledge of the great Lovecraftian deities are so hidden away,
actually, the response to many of these cults is pretty lackluster, because they just don't know
how to respond to things that are so far beyond human comprehension, it's usually like a few
policemen who try and fumble their way through to try and tackle these cults, so the actual response
is pretty lackluster compared to an actual god being involved.
I see, I see. And now, good point, good point.
And now a question, a hardball for each of you. Eli, now, of course, both of these immensely
powerful alien pantheons do, at least in some ways, empower their worshippers.
With the Chaos Gods, though, and again, I admit some of this could be lacking of knowledge on my
part, but to my knowledge, Lovecraftian gods, while they don't necessarily care about their
worshippers, usually do not turn them into living soup, such as the Thousand Suns or Chaos Spawn,
when their worshippers are a bit too easy with their power. I mean, it was Magnus' fault,
Magnus did everything wrong. But I need you to ask, how can you defend such a thing where,
even if you love the Chaos Gods too much, they turn you into a Chaos Spawn or they punish you?
How are such things defensible? Well, you know, all things in moderation,
as we know, moderation is very healthy. But if you do it right, you get only the good stuff.
Even some of the bad stuff is not that bad most of the time. It's pretty rare that a dude gets
turned into a Chaos Spawn. You've got to mess up pretty astronomically. And most of the time,
if you go really for it, you'll get turned into a Demon Prince, which is pretty dang cool to me.
I don't think that's so bad. You know, if you mess up with Zaint, you might get a few extra
tentacles. But I mean, come on, like, what's wrong with that? You have more limbs now to do more
stuff. I don't see a big deal in that. Flesh might make you a little obsessed, but it's not always a
bad thing to be obsessed. You'll get really good at something if you're obsessed with it. And I
mean, Nergal has no downsides. Other people might think you're ugly and gross looking, but you're
happy. You don't see what they see. You know in the inside that you're a happy guy and that you're
beautiful to Nergal himself and you're pretty safe. I see. I see. Thank you, Wielon. That was a
succinct, a nice good answer. Hal, your hardball will be. If I were to list off all of the
Lovecraftian deities on the YouTube video, how quickly would I be cancelled? And how does this
affect the larger scale of the war? That's a very good point to be fair. Well, funny enough,
there's only probably one name that would probably slightly get you in trouble, but that has no
bearing on the actual power of the Lovecraftian deities. And in fact, these are just simply the
human names we assign them, because again, we don't even necessarily possess the capability to
say their true name or to utter it in their alien tongue. So technically, it's not really their
fault. It's actually YouTube's fault and humanity's fault because we're just so weak.
And racist. Yes. They don't care about race because everyone is just other to them.
HP Lovecraft, no. Not the cat. Leave the cat.
So that is some good points from everyone. Eli, I do like how you managed to sort of put out
an actually pretty good defense on the whole chaos spawning your soul thing. And Hal, I do like how
you pointed out that, again, they're so alien that what we call them is simply not even their true
names. It's just the closest we can come to comprehending that. That being said, it is still
something you need to keep in mind with the with the respective pantheons. The chaos gods can,
can at their whim, harshly punish you. And with the Lovecraftian universe, it's very racist.
It would appear that both of these universe, both of these deities have some pretty significant
built in weaknesses. Yes. Are you both ready for the assault round? I don't want to hear nice
argument. I want to hear just insults being thrown back and forth. Is everyone ready? I'm ready.
Eli, or Hal, I want you to imagine that if you don't bring out all the vitriol you have,
the sleeping god will wake and everything will just simply blue screen and end. Well, I'm not
going to bring up the spirit of HP Lovecraft, if you know what I mean. But I will get off.
And I just want to say I want some vitriol going and Eli, I want you to imagine that Endless Space
2 has just desync for the fifth time that night. Oh, no, no. Oh my gosh. You're gonna have to kill
Hal. Why would you do that? I'm booking a plane ticket right now. So are the contestants ready?
Yep. Yes. All right, Eli, your minute of hate starts now.
As you wish. Let's see. I'm not a big hater. We all know that, but I'll try my best. Why would
you worship these goofy freaking gods? There's literally no reason to think about them at all.
They're dicks. They don't care about you at all. And they make it that goofy ass looking fish people
for the slimy and ugly. Come on. You get nothing good out of that. What are these Lovecraftian
gods even going up against? They're so powerful and all, but they don't have an emperor of mankind
to go up against. There's just, what are they going to do from the 17th century? Oh, big deal.
The Chaos gods would have an issue with that. And we say they're so OP and they could take over the
universe, but they haven't yet. There must be some kind of reason that they have to sustain.
Maybe they're too scared of losing their little baby guys. Let's be honest. These guys kind of
sound like a little kid made them be like, my guy can do this and your guy can't do this. My guy is
OP and your guy's not OP. And that's just how it is. All I'm saying is I don't see a point of liking
these guys of being on their side. They're just goofy. You don't get cool Norse skins and Skaven
and Chaos Prismarines. There's no reason. They're ugly and they're goofy. Goofy. All right. They're
ugly. It is looking quite good. Hal, your turn. Your time starts now. I'm going to start off.
Corn, your honor. He sucks. The Blood God is a bland deity. He literally is a walking
contradiction. He supposedly represents honor, but yet his worshipers slaughter the weak and
defenseless. How can one be honorable and yet not care for when the blood flows? I'm sorry.
That makes no sense. Slanesh targets elves. Cringe. Leave them alone. Zinch, the changer of ways,
supposedly can see the future and yet at times he loses on purpose because he just has to for some
reason. You said why the Lovecrafting God's not taken over. They don't. They already have. There's
no one to fight because they already won. There's no one to challenge them. The Chaos Gods even
altogether still couldn't beat humanity during the Horus heresy. They had to have a puppet like
Horus who still couldn't beat the Emperor. Yeah, the Emperor actually won and beat all their armies.
Cadian took 10,000 years to get conquered. All the forces of Chaos. And it's like one thing.
And basically, they're all rip-offs of the Lovecrafting Gods anyway. They're pretty much all
rip-offs. All right. Hal definitely brought the vitriol for that round. I had better things to
rip apart, your honor. Interesting. Interesting. Just give me a moment to mentally review the
arguments. Are there any words between each other you'd like to say? It's a free-for-all
right now. I'm just trying to, while I collect and think on the arguments. Did the contestants
have anything they'd like to get off their chests? I thought it was really funny when he said they're
ugly. It's so true. Yeah. Chaos is beauty. Chaos is beauty. But that's the whole point. The problem
with them is they are so humanly meant to... Like Korn, obviously, was it like a Dark Knight or
whatever? It's meant to be human. Imagine to think that you're so important that your God looked
human. Like he has any need for what's between its legs, if you know what I mean. Like it has any
need for that. I thought it was funny that calling them ugly was hilarious. That was pretty funny.
You're ugly? I want to kill you? Give me $200. Yeah. Also, the Great Horned Rat, don't even call him
a Chaos God. He's better than the Pantheon. He's better than them. He doesn't deserve to be sullied
with the rest of Korn. You saved it. Korn was cool until the writers messed it up. He wasn't always
contradictory, I'm pretty sure. Yeah, but we don't have a GW writer moment. We don't have a Korn,
though. We have all of them have something interesting about Lovecraftian. All right.
I believe my mental calculations are completed. With round one, Eli gave us a nice little quick
summary of what they are. Went over the big Korn man, the big Nergal man. Good stuff. It was very
quick. The brevity was quite nice and it was a nice quiet confidence. Pardon me. I'm having a
nice Dr. Pepper, the best soda ever. We all know Warhammer stuff anyway. We know Warhammer,
if you're watching this. It was a nice succinct introduction. Hal, on the other hand, there's
also something to be said for filling the time up and making good use of the allotted time you have.
So both of those are commendable. Eli, second round. I do appreciate the...
what you had to bring to the table. Talk about how intrinsically the Chaos Gods connect to humanity.
Which, while yes, Hal, you have said that the Lovecraftian Gods don't need it, I don't at
least personally believe there's necessarily something inherently wrong with intrinsically
needing humanity in the setting of 40k. Where the Xenos are given one paragraph of lore for every
20 about the Ultramarine's tenth company first tactical... And how you had to write their laurels
and their purity cells properly. But that being said, again, it is undeniable that the
Lovecraftian deities and all that such and such just don't need us at the end of the day.
They'll be here long after we're gone. Which of course, that does give weaknesses to both.
Obviously the Chaos Gods are reliant on the mortal universe, but they also can get much,
at least I feel, much more benefits from the mortal universe than the Lovecraftian Gods can,
which is something to be said of both methods. And for the final round, both of you brought the
Vitriol. Eli did mention Warhammer Fantasy, and mentioning Warhammer Fantasy is quite simply the
easiest way for me to be on your side in a Warhammer argument. That's such a bribe. It's such a bribe.
Warhammer Fantasy acknowledged. Much appreciated. However, Hal, in the spirit of the anger section,
I do have to just flat out say, I think you brought a lot more Vitriol to the table,
and that's something I have to commend for the anger section.
Yeah, and I commented on Khorne as well. He did.
There's a whole diss of Khorne.
Speaking of bribery, he did also open up with Khorne sucks,
which is undeniably also a good way to bribe me. So it looks a nice bit of bribery and anger
about throughout the episode, which is highly appreciated. Whoever says hard work pays off,
bribery pays off. It's not it's who you know and how to fuck up. Official lore crimes life advice.
We don't stand by that. Please don't take that as gospel.
As gospel. I'm kidding. Please don't blame me when you try and bribe a cop and then get shot.
Also, Slaanesh targets elves, which is very cringe.
Lach. See the bribery still going.
Yeah, it's still I mean, I don't remember that.
But HP Lovecraft doesn't even have elves.
I know. He's older than Lord of the Rings.
That's uh, oh, that is uh, that is another good point.
I mean, they just I mean, the writers hate the elves. It's even worse having them.
That's true. The elves, the elves do get bullied in 40k, but they exist in the Warhammer setting.
So perhaps they're not related to Chaos Gods. So thank you.
Something to be said for both sides.
And with that, I have my decision.
Very hard to reach, honestly. I'm still not entirely sure.
So I would again, I just do want to say both of these arguments quite speak to me personally.
Whatever you might say from an unbiased point of view, I'm biased.
I don't so I mean, you're not getting an unbiased judgemanship.
Can comment below who you thought won as well.
Oh, of course, as always, the audience.
They will let us know.
I am one vote. You are many votes like the Tyranid Hivemind Superior.
Also, we've forgotten any good points. Be sure to comment below so we can use that for next time.
We'll look them over, maybe bring them up in the next versus for some bangers you guys left.
But my final vote, I'm afraid, needs to go to drumroll.
I can't hear anything.
I thought about banging on my desk.
I would ruin the microphones.
I'm afraid that I need to give it to Hal.
Oh, my God. I mean, such suspense that did.
Which one? Which was the deciding factor?
Was it the the Azathoth like it's all a dream and he could just wake up and then they're gone?
That's my strongest.
That is that is something that kind of I feel does quite significantly revolve around,
especially given that that's part of my defense for Talos.
Circling around like when you take out one guy and everything just kind of stops.
That is quite important, although I would like to say that though I think Hal won the debate.
It was very close in my mind.
I had a very hard time choosing.
And to the point where I was still debating on if I was going to save Eli one or not as I was,
it was leaving my mouth.
Oh, my God. Wow.
But that being said, if I had to choose between which of these two pantheons to worship,
I would probably pick the Chaos Gods.
That's why I believe Hal won the debate.
I would pick the Chaos Gods.
Yeah, I'd probably bet it's just to serve.
I think I think it's an end result of either is insanity.
It's just a matter of is it like the cool and sin or the
you get, you know, corn, I can cut a building in half with a flick of my wrist,
or is it I'm just insane and my brain is now mashed potatoes?
Or have you seen too much of the truth of the universe?
So to everyone, I see that mad.
Yeah, that's that is something I get.
I guess, you know, seems to be fair, it does kind of do that.
But seems also let's cast some pretty big fireballs.
So, yeah, that was a good point by Eli there.
Yeah, the boons, because my boons are like, they're kind of cool.
Like you can do some magic stuff, you can summon things and you can obviously gain
knowledge and immortality.
But then, I mean, you can't cut a building in half or like suddenly grow
mushrooms from your like foot or something and then just like waltz in and infect things,
you know, can't do that.
Which might not sound like much of a superpower, but whenever when you're
fighting suddenly develops Omega Ebola.
Perhaps better than you might think initially.
Fecal Jackson Pollock, the superpower.
Oh Christ.
But I hope everyone had a I hope you two had a nice good time, a nice good debate.
It was good.
And I hope the audience enjoyed listening.
As we said, let us know who you think won in the comments.
Let us know any points we might have missed to bring up any questions you might have.
Maybe we can see keep it going a little bit in the comments.
Remember that it took the Eldar 65 million years to finally make a Chaos God.
There's a humanity about five minutes.
So Eldar superiority.
Well, it sounds like we're just better at making Chaos Gods.
Yeah, I don't think that's something you want to be better at.
I'm just going to be honest with you.
Deadass, my guy.
Necrons are going to win in the end anyways.
That's the orcs clearly.
That's where most likely Tyranids.
It's not.
I hate it, but it will be turned it.
And of course, remember to hit that fancy smash that motherfucking like button.
What's this?
And hit that sub hit the bell ring the bell.
Hit the gritty on the way to the.
Remember hashtag free sleepy.
Lumi, if you're watching this, I would love to play Battlefleet Gothic with you.
I told you I was going to do it.
I missed whatever.
I missed Pakistan.
What's going on?
PPP.
Oh, my God.
And I.
Thank you all for coming.
We'll have a good time.
And yeah, have a good have a good one, everyone.
Take care.
Peace.
I love you.
Yeah.