1
00:00:00,000 --> 00:00:04,080
I don't know if I want to hear this.

2
00:00:04,080 --> 00:00:05,280
You do want to hear this story.

3
00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:08,760
So as you know, and as the listeners may know,

4
00:00:08,760 --> 00:00:10,360
I spent the last week in New York.

5
00:00:10,360 --> 00:00:12,800
And one thing about me is I'm a theater kid to my core.

6
00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:15,680
You saw so many shows.

7
00:00:15,680 --> 00:00:19,000
So the thing is that I went in with the plan

8
00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:20,600
to see maybe one or two.

9
00:00:20,600 --> 00:00:23,040
It was like a week, and I had plans on the first

10
00:00:23,040 --> 00:00:25,520
and last days, like the full days that I was going to be

11
00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:27,840
there, and then I purposely left the ones in the middle

12
00:00:27,840 --> 00:00:28,680
very open.

13
00:00:28,680 --> 00:00:31,080
So because I was like, no plans.

14
00:00:31,080 --> 00:00:32,600
Normally, I plan down to the minute.

15
00:00:32,600 --> 00:00:34,160
But this time, I'm going to like chill.

16
00:00:34,160 --> 00:00:35,760
I'm going to hang out in Brooklyn,

17
00:00:35,760 --> 00:00:37,960
which is where I was staying, see my friends

18
00:00:37,960 --> 00:00:39,400
in the interim, whatever.

19
00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:43,320
And then I got there, and I thought

20
00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:45,040
about going to one on Monday, and I didn't end up

21
00:00:45,040 --> 00:00:45,760
being able to make it.

22
00:00:45,760 --> 00:00:47,360
And what was the first one that I saw?

23
00:00:47,360 --> 00:00:48,840
Oh, fucking shucked.

24
00:00:48,840 --> 00:00:50,520
I was going to say you was.

25
00:00:50,520 --> 00:00:52,080
I can't even keep track.

26
00:00:52,080 --> 00:00:53,480
It was a banger.

27
00:00:53,480 --> 00:00:55,560
I was like, yeah, let's see the corn musical.

28
00:00:55,560 --> 00:00:57,840
Because you can go to the TKTS booth

29
00:00:57,840 --> 00:01:00,760
and get very discounted tickets day of.

30
00:01:00,760 --> 00:01:02,400
So I was like, yeah, corn musical.

31
00:01:02,400 --> 00:01:03,360
I know nothing about it.

32
00:01:03,360 --> 00:01:05,880
I listened to a little bit of the soundtrack.

33
00:01:05,880 --> 00:01:07,120
Let's go.

34
00:01:07,120 --> 00:01:08,000
It hit.

35
00:01:08,000 --> 00:01:09,480
I don't know how to explain it.

36
00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:11,720
It made my heart so happy.

37
00:01:11,720 --> 00:01:14,600
And then it unlocked my little theater kid brain,

38
00:01:14,600 --> 00:01:19,200
and I was like, what if I just saw one per night?

39
00:01:19,200 --> 00:01:21,720
I did see one most nights.

40
00:01:21,720 --> 00:01:26,440
I didn't Monday or Thursday, but I did do a double show day

41
00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:33,440
on Wednesday, I believe, where I saw a matinee and an evening

42
00:01:33,440 --> 00:01:33,800
show.

43
00:01:33,800 --> 00:01:35,000
That takes care of it.

44
00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:37,240
That's an attention span.

45
00:01:37,240 --> 00:01:39,920
So I did see five shows in five days.

46
00:01:39,920 --> 00:01:41,880
Jesus.

47
00:01:41,880 --> 00:01:43,800
I think.

48
00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:46,080
Monday?

49
00:01:46,080 --> 00:01:47,200
Yeah, because I didn't see.

50
00:01:47,200 --> 00:01:48,480
No, I did see one on Saturday.

51
00:01:48,480 --> 00:01:49,040
Listen, I don't know.

52
00:01:49,040 --> 00:01:50,720
I think I saw five shows in five days.

53
00:01:50,720 --> 00:01:51,720
Because I didn't on the first day.

54
00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:52,320
That's what it was.

55
00:01:52,320 --> 00:01:53,160
I trust you.

56
00:01:53,160 --> 00:02:00,480
I was sitting next to my stack of eyeballs.

57
00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:04,800
The stack is larger than a KU exclusive room.

58
00:02:04,800 --> 00:02:08,000
Not the KU.

59
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,600
700 pages.

60
00:02:09,600 --> 00:02:10,600
Yeah, perhaps.

61
00:02:10,600 --> 00:02:11,600
Five shows in five days.

62
00:02:11,600 --> 00:02:13,160
But listen, that wasn't even that much for me.

63
00:02:13,160 --> 00:02:14,200
I could have seen more.

64
00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:15,200
You could have.

65
00:02:15,200 --> 00:02:16,800
There were other shows I wanted to see.

66
00:02:16,800 --> 00:02:18,520
Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked.

67
00:02:18,520 --> 00:02:23,520
I saw Parade, which was insane and very moving.

68
00:02:23,520 --> 00:02:26,320
And I don't necessarily recommend the soundtrack,

69
00:02:26,320 --> 00:02:29,560
because it's not one that I would just go listen to.

70
00:02:29,560 --> 00:02:32,800
But I would recommend looking up the story,

71
00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,720
because it's based on a true story of this really

72
00:02:35,720 --> 00:02:41,240
horrific anti-Semitism in the South in the early 1900s.

73
00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:41,760
And it's.

74
00:02:41,760 --> 00:02:44,920
I would not have guessed that from the title Parade.

75
00:02:44,920 --> 00:02:45,400
No.

76
00:02:45,400 --> 00:02:48,480
So it starts on a Confederate Day Parade.

77
00:02:48,480 --> 00:02:50,320
And that's the segue I see.

78
00:02:50,320 --> 00:02:51,880
I see where we're getting there.

79
00:02:51,880 --> 00:02:55,280
So you start with the Confederate Day Parade

80
00:02:55,280 --> 00:02:59,040
or whatever, and it opens with a young Confederate soldier

81
00:02:59,040 --> 00:03:01,600
singing this goodbye song to his little girl.

82
00:03:01,600 --> 00:03:04,240
Well, actually, let's back up a second.

83
00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:04,760
For context.

84
00:03:04,760 --> 00:03:06,480
Back up, baby, back up.

85
00:03:06,480 --> 00:03:08,520
Because I just have to address this really quickly.

86
00:03:08,520 --> 00:03:10,480
I was sitting in the third row in the middle,

87
00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:12,480
because it was a last minute thing.

88
00:03:12,480 --> 00:03:14,000
I was really cheap.

89
00:03:14,000 --> 00:03:15,280
They were like, you want good seats?

90
00:03:15,280 --> 00:03:16,360
And I was like, sure.

91
00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:18,200
And they put me in the third row.

92
00:03:18,200 --> 00:03:19,800
So I'm looking up at this.

93
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:23,480
And the thing about me is if it's an ensemble cast,

94
00:03:23,480 --> 00:03:25,200
I will find the hottest one.

95
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:28,360
I saw that.

96
00:03:28,360 --> 00:03:32,960
I still have a crush on the Watson in my.

97
00:03:32,960 --> 00:03:35,080
No, I was probably in eighth grade.

98
00:03:35,080 --> 00:03:38,480
Whoever played a Watson when I was in eighth grade

99
00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:41,560
at my high school, you were the light of my life.

100
00:03:41,560 --> 00:03:44,200
You could rock my world, whoever you were.

101
00:03:44,200 --> 00:03:44,800
I get that.

102
00:03:44,800 --> 00:03:46,560
It was so hot.

103
00:03:46,560 --> 00:03:49,840
That was also me watching King Arthur in Camelot.

104
00:03:49,840 --> 00:03:51,360
I was like, why is that man so fine?

105
00:03:51,360 --> 00:03:53,400
And then I met a theater major at the stage door.

106
00:03:53,400 --> 00:03:55,280
And she was like, why was Arthur so hot?

107
00:03:55,280 --> 00:03:58,080
And I was like, no, but for real, why was Arthur so hot?

108
00:03:58,080 --> 00:04:01,160
Anyway, back to Parade.

109
00:04:01,160 --> 00:04:03,440
There's a platform in the middle of the stage.

110
00:04:03,440 --> 00:04:05,240
And there's all these pews where people

111
00:04:05,240 --> 00:04:06,360
are facing the platform.

112
00:04:06,360 --> 00:04:07,760
And they're all standing there.

113
00:04:07,760 --> 00:04:09,520
And again, I'm in the third row.

114
00:04:09,520 --> 00:04:11,840
And I have this habit of fixating on the hottest

115
00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:13,600
ensemble member.

116
00:04:13,600 --> 00:04:17,680
The show opens with a young, hot, blonde guy

117
00:04:17,680 --> 00:04:21,320
stepping up onto the platform with a young, pretty girl.

118
00:04:21,320 --> 00:04:24,080
And they rip their clothes off and immediately

119
00:04:24,080 --> 00:04:27,160
drop to the ground and have simulated sex.

120
00:04:27,160 --> 00:04:31,280
So you're like, all right, kicking off strong.

121
00:04:31,280 --> 00:04:33,720
What is going on here?

122
00:04:33,720 --> 00:04:36,320
And then they get up, and he puts his shirt back on,

123
00:04:36,320 --> 00:04:37,520
and he sings a song.

124
00:04:37,520 --> 00:04:38,960
So this guy is fine.

125
00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:40,200
I'm like, who is this man?

126
00:04:40,200 --> 00:04:42,000
He goes on to play other various characters.

127
00:04:42,000 --> 00:04:44,640
You know it's bad when he's playing a Confederate soldier.

128
00:04:44,640 --> 00:04:47,480
And I was still like, OK, but I can make it work, right?

129
00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:48,760
I know he's acting.

130
00:04:48,760 --> 00:04:51,240
Obviously, this man is not actually a Confederate.

131
00:04:51,240 --> 00:04:54,240
But why was I into the Confederate soldier?

132
00:04:54,240 --> 00:04:57,280
Anyway, I looked him up after the show.

133
00:04:57,280 --> 00:05:01,720
He is, in fact, I think like 25, 26,

134
00:05:01,720 --> 00:05:05,680
and went to OU, which was a rival school at my college.

135
00:05:05,680 --> 00:05:07,120
The flags were red.

136
00:05:07,120 --> 00:05:08,760
But red was her favorite color.

137
00:05:08,760 --> 00:05:13,440
And I was like, but I was colorblind.

138
00:05:13,440 --> 00:05:15,280
OU is, in fact, their color is red.

139
00:05:17,640 --> 00:05:20,400
Anyway, so I'm in love with this man as a side note.

140
00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:21,800
That's not relevant to the story,

141
00:05:21,800 --> 00:05:24,800
except that it starts on a Confederate Day parade.

142
00:05:24,800 --> 00:05:26,880
Our main characters are this Jewish couple.

143
00:05:26,880 --> 00:05:29,880
And the wife is Southern, but the man, Leo Frank,

144
00:05:29,880 --> 00:05:32,920
who's the real guy who was the victim in all of this,

145
00:05:32,920 --> 00:05:38,200
is like a Jewish man from New York

146
00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:40,600
who had to move to Georgia for his job.

147
00:05:40,600 --> 00:05:41,920
And he hates it.

148
00:05:41,920 --> 00:05:44,160
And he's like, this is the worst.

149
00:05:44,160 --> 00:05:46,800
And she's like, Leo, why are you going to work today?

150
00:05:46,800 --> 00:05:48,480
Don't you know it's a holiday?

151
00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:49,920
It's Confederate Day.

152
00:05:49,920 --> 00:05:50,920
It's the whole parade.

153
00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:52,640
And he basically has a line where he's like,

154
00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:56,280
I've never understood why we celebrated losing a war.

155
00:05:56,280 --> 00:05:58,080
I mean, he's so real for that.

156
00:05:58,080 --> 00:05:59,520
And he is so real for that.

157
00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:02,960
This was a very long and roundabout segue into,

158
00:06:02,960 --> 00:06:04,440
that man was a Confederate.

159
00:06:04,440 --> 00:06:07,240
Stop.

160
00:06:07,240 --> 00:06:14,240
I remember reading Beautiful Creatures.

161
00:06:14,240 --> 00:06:16,960
I think I read two and a half books out of that trilogy

162
00:06:16,960 --> 00:06:19,480
or whatever the fuck it is.

163
00:06:19,480 --> 00:06:21,200
And in the first book, they were talking

164
00:06:21,200 --> 00:06:22,840
about the war of Northern aggression,

165
00:06:22,840 --> 00:06:25,120
which is the first time I'd ever heard of that.

166
00:06:25,120 --> 00:06:26,240
I was like, what?

167
00:06:26,240 --> 00:06:32,520
I mean, they were staunchly anti the Confederacy in that book.

168
00:06:32,520 --> 00:06:34,920
He was like, why is it called the war of Northern aggression?

169
00:06:34,920 --> 00:06:36,200
It was a whole thing.

170
00:06:36,200 --> 00:06:38,240
I had never heard of that because I grew up in Minnesota.

171
00:06:38,240 --> 00:06:40,080
Apparently, Minnesota has a Confederate flag

172
00:06:40,080 --> 00:06:43,240
that we stole from one of the Confederate states.

173
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,560
We want it in battle, and we won't give it back.

174
00:06:45,560 --> 00:06:47,480
They want it back, and we're like, no.

175
00:06:47,480 --> 00:06:48,160
OK, I love that.

176
00:06:48,160 --> 00:06:49,160
You can't have it.

177
00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:50,560
This is our Confederate flag now.

178
00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:53,040
Yeah, Governor Walt, he's like, no.

179
00:06:53,040 --> 00:06:55,680
He's a very nice man, but no, we will not give you.

180
00:06:55,680 --> 00:06:58,680
He's so British core of them.

181
00:06:58,680 --> 00:06:59,880
Oh, you want this thing back?

182
00:06:59,880 --> 00:07:00,640
Too bad.

183
00:07:00,640 --> 00:07:01,400
It's ours now.

184
00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:03,440
Because I don't know what state it was,

185
00:07:03,440 --> 00:07:04,840
but they're like, it's our history.

186
00:07:04,840 --> 00:07:06,680
And we're like, no, we beat you.

187
00:07:06,680 --> 00:07:08,160
It's our history.

188
00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:10,480
So we do have that going for us.

189
00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:11,440
Makes sense.

190
00:07:11,440 --> 00:07:13,080
That's all I know.

191
00:07:13,080 --> 00:07:19,480
So imagine our surprise, opening this book, this book,

192
00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:27,360
Texas Destiny by the radio, and finding out that, I mean,

193
00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:31,360
the stuff that we found out in this book, it was a lot.

194
00:07:31,360 --> 00:07:33,080
I get that he was a child.

195
00:07:33,080 --> 00:07:35,720
He didn't go into the war of his own volition,

196
00:07:35,720 --> 00:07:37,280
and he didn't want to be there.

197
00:07:37,280 --> 00:07:40,320
But there wasn't even a half-assed attempt at an,

198
00:07:40,320 --> 00:07:41,760
oh, I didn't even really understand

199
00:07:41,760 --> 00:07:42,960
what we were fighting for.

200
00:07:42,960 --> 00:07:45,120
And if I was a man, I would never have enlivened, blah,

201
00:07:45,120 --> 00:07:45,600
blah, blah.

202
00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:46,160
No.

203
00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:47,720
No.

204
00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:51,240
She, meanwhile, she's like, my dad owned slaves,

205
00:07:51,240 --> 00:07:52,320
our plantation.

206
00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:54,360
And when that Yankee took over, my mom and I

207
00:07:54,360 --> 00:07:55,880
moved into the slave quarters.

208
00:07:55,880 --> 00:07:58,720
And he's like, oh, how horrible that you had to endure this.

209
00:07:58,720 --> 00:08:00,560
And I'm like, what about the slaves

210
00:08:00,560 --> 00:08:03,440
who lived in said slave quarters?

211
00:08:03,440 --> 00:08:05,320
And there was nothing about them.

212
00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:06,240
Nothing.

213
00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:11,160
No mention of the enslaved people of the South, anywhere.

214
00:08:11,160 --> 00:08:13,480
Where did they go?

215
00:08:13,480 --> 00:08:13,960
No.

216
00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:15,360
You know they were out there.

217
00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:17,760
The majority of cowboys were black.

218
00:08:17,760 --> 00:08:20,160
I'm usually pretty good at separating.

219
00:08:20,160 --> 00:08:25,040
I read older historical romances as historical texts.

220
00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:27,600
I would not rate one from the 90s the same way

221
00:08:27,600 --> 00:08:29,800
that I would one that was written today.

222
00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:32,840
Even in the 90s, like, you know.

223
00:08:32,840 --> 00:08:34,880
We lost.

224
00:08:34,880 --> 00:08:37,000
I mean, I live in Texas, but I'm not a confederate.

225
00:08:37,000 --> 00:08:40,680
Caroline is a ghost.

226
00:08:40,680 --> 00:08:41,920
She was alive back then.

227
00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,280
The South lost, guys.

228
00:08:44,280 --> 00:08:47,280
They were bad.

229
00:08:47,280 --> 00:08:48,840
I don't know what to tell you.

230
00:08:48,840 --> 00:08:50,360
That's why I just don't.

231
00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:54,560
You could have not written that and written the same book.

232
00:08:54,560 --> 00:08:56,200
You could have just not.

233
00:08:56,200 --> 00:08:59,240
Yeah, it could have been not a war.

234
00:08:59,240 --> 00:09:03,400
We also have the Flame and the Flower, which I read the back

235
00:09:03,400 --> 00:09:04,600
of it.

236
00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:07,000
And I was like, wait, does that say plantation?

237
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:08,560
And it sure does say plantation.

238
00:09:08,560 --> 00:09:11,800
So I am scared for that part of my life.

239
00:09:11,800 --> 00:09:14,560
There have been several old ones that I bought because the step

240
00:09:14,560 --> 00:09:16,920
back was pretty thrifted, to be clear.

241
00:09:16,920 --> 00:09:19,320
I did not pay the author.

242
00:09:19,320 --> 00:09:23,120
But then read the back and was like, uh-oh.

243
00:09:23,120 --> 00:09:24,720
I'm not going to be reading that.

244
00:09:24,720 --> 00:09:29,160
I have to read the summary now, because I'm like, I cannot.

245
00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:31,560
No matter how the cover does not matter.

246
00:09:31,560 --> 00:09:33,040
I'm like, no, no, no, no, no.

247
00:09:33,040 --> 00:09:37,440
Well, that's why I will trust a historical Western written

248
00:09:37,440 --> 00:09:43,080
within the past five, maybe a little bit before years.

249
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:44,680
And there have been some really fun ones.

250
00:09:44,680 --> 00:09:48,400
But unless Beverly Jenkins wrote it,

251
00:09:48,400 --> 00:09:50,440
I'm not picking up an old school Western.

252
00:09:50,440 --> 00:09:54,200
Because this was not a safe time.

253
00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:56,640
And again, I'm normally pretty good at separating out

254
00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:59,640
historical romance, especially when we're in Regency or

255
00:09:59,640 --> 00:10:00,400
Victoria.

256
00:10:00,400 --> 00:10:03,560
It's not the place to explore colonialism and racism

257
00:10:03,560 --> 00:10:04,280
and all of that.

258
00:10:04,280 --> 00:10:05,720
That's just not what it's doing.

259
00:10:05,720 --> 00:10:08,160
So this is like a fictional version of the past,

260
00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:11,640
where unless it's like Adriana Herrera or somebody,

261
00:10:11,640 --> 00:10:13,640
we're just not really talking about that.

262
00:10:13,640 --> 00:10:16,080
Yes, in real life, the Dukes were bad guys.

263
00:10:16,080 --> 00:10:18,600
But that's not the focus.

264
00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:19,960
I can separate that out.

265
00:10:19,960 --> 00:10:21,040
But I started this book.

266
00:10:21,040 --> 00:10:22,600
Landlords are not sexy.

267
00:10:22,600 --> 00:10:25,320
No, no, no.

268
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:29,520
However, comma and or comma but.

269
00:10:29,520 --> 00:10:31,000
But this one, I started and was like,

270
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:33,200
I actually can't give this more than three stars.

271
00:10:33,200 --> 00:10:35,160
Because I literally, even when I would,

272
00:10:35,160 --> 00:10:37,320
I mean, I didn't like so many other things about it.

273
00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:39,440
But even during the parts that I would start to enjoy,

274
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:42,000
my brain would be like, this man was a Confederate.

275
00:10:42,000 --> 00:10:44,680
And I'd be like, well, fuck.

276
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:46,160
I can't read this.

277
00:10:46,160 --> 00:10:48,320
Because I've read the other two in the series as well.

278
00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:51,800
And at least this guy just fucking hated war.

279
00:10:51,800 --> 00:10:54,080
And he just did not like it.

280
00:10:54,080 --> 00:10:56,120
Not really to his credit.

281
00:10:56,120 --> 00:10:57,520
Because he didn't like it for the reason

282
00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:59,560
that you should not like it.

283
00:10:59,560 --> 00:11:01,320
He was like 13, though.

284
00:11:01,320 --> 00:11:03,360
Yeah, they were very small.

285
00:11:03,360 --> 00:11:04,760
But they were also very large.

286
00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:06,800
Like, it's a thing.

287
00:11:06,800 --> 00:11:07,960
Like.

288
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:10,480
I'm like, I also wouldn't want to walk into war now

289
00:11:10,480 --> 00:11:11,680
as an adult.

290
00:11:11,680 --> 00:11:12,840
No.

291
00:11:12,840 --> 00:11:14,680
There's another civil war.

292
00:11:14,680 --> 00:11:16,600
No.

293
00:11:16,600 --> 00:11:19,400
I mean, the ride that this series was,

294
00:11:19,400 --> 00:11:21,280
it just kept getting worse.

295
00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:23,160
It was like going to like Dante's leg,

296
00:11:23,160 --> 00:11:25,240
whatever levels of hell.

297
00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:26,360
Like.

298
00:11:26,360 --> 00:11:27,400
The Inferno.

299
00:11:27,400 --> 00:11:28,520
I was there.

300
00:11:28,520 --> 00:11:31,640
I was with Dan Brown and Tom Hanks.

301
00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:32,400
It was rare.

302
00:11:32,400 --> 00:11:33,320
I was there.

303
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:34,440
It was rare.

304
00:11:34,440 --> 00:11:35,560
I was there.

305
00:11:35,560 --> 00:11:38,280
I actually don't remember it all too well.

306
00:11:38,280 --> 00:11:41,800
I have kind of blocked it out from my memory.

307
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:44,440
I remember some parts of this book.

308
00:11:44,440 --> 00:11:47,960
And I remember the bad parts of the third book.

309
00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:49,960
Book two.

310
00:11:49,960 --> 00:11:51,080
Is book two Houston?

311
00:11:51,080 --> 00:11:52,160
I mean, Austin?

312
00:11:52,160 --> 00:11:52,800
No.

313
00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:53,800
It's the other one.

314
00:11:53,800 --> 00:11:54,520
This is.

315
00:11:54,520 --> 00:11:55,040
Dallas.

316
00:11:55,040 --> 00:11:55,760
Oh my god.

317
00:11:55,760 --> 00:11:58,400
I live in Texas.

318
00:11:58,400 --> 00:12:00,240
I was like, what other cities are there?

319
00:12:00,240 --> 00:12:02,120
San Antonio.

320
00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:05,200
Yes, this man is named San Antonio.

321
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:08,320
Well, since that actually means Saint Antonio.

322
00:12:08,320 --> 00:12:09,320
Saint Anthony.

323
00:12:09,320 --> 00:12:10,360
Could have been named Anthony.

324
00:12:10,360 --> 00:12:11,520
What even happened in that?

325
00:12:11,520 --> 00:12:12,480
I don't even know.

326
00:12:12,480 --> 00:12:14,240
I did think it was a funny bit when

327
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:15,760
he mentioned like his brothers are named

328
00:12:15,760 --> 00:12:16,880
after where they're born.

329
00:12:16,880 --> 00:12:17,840
And what's your name?

330
00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:20,080
The heroine was like, what would have happened

331
00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:23,040
if you'd been born in Galveston?

332
00:12:23,040 --> 00:12:24,960
He's like, I don't know, never thought about it.

333
00:12:24,960 --> 00:12:28,400
Which, by the way, is the most like male response.

334
00:12:28,400 --> 00:12:30,120
Specifically like straight men.

335
00:12:30,120 --> 00:12:31,240
You'll be like, well, what about this?

336
00:12:31,240 --> 00:12:32,720
And they're like, I don't know, didn't think about it.

337
00:12:32,720 --> 00:12:35,600
What do you mean you didn't think about it?

338
00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:36,560
Your name, what were the?

339
00:12:36,560 --> 00:12:39,640
So it was Houston, Austin.

340
00:12:39,640 --> 00:12:40,400
Dallas was the oldest.

341
00:12:40,400 --> 00:12:41,160
Dallas.

342
00:12:41,160 --> 00:12:43,000
Yeah.

343
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,200
Yeah, really, there's not much else that would be.

344
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:45,760
Oh, no.

345
00:12:45,760 --> 00:12:48,840
She found the three names that were.

346
00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:49,320
Fort Worth.

347
00:12:49,320 --> 00:12:50,680
The publisher wants book four.

348
00:12:50,680 --> 00:12:51,360
Absolutely not.

349
00:12:51,360 --> 00:12:51,880
El Paso.

350
00:12:51,880 --> 00:12:53,120
El Paso.

351
00:12:53,120 --> 00:12:55,760
No, I.

352
00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:57,920
Corpus Christi.

353
00:12:57,920 --> 00:13:02,200
You're just named after the body of Christ, it's fine.

354
00:13:02,200 --> 00:13:03,440
What do you have that book to?

355
00:13:03,440 --> 00:13:04,960
Actually, is that what Corpus Christi means?

356
00:13:04,960 --> 00:13:06,960
Not me not knowing if that's whatever.

357
00:13:06,960 --> 00:13:07,960
We just don't have to know about it.

358
00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:08,960
Bro, I don't know.

359
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:12,000
I am in not Texas.

360
00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,400
I have no clue.

361
00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:17,120
I can't even name like any geographical thing.

362
00:13:17,120 --> 00:13:18,320
I'm so bad.

363
00:13:18,320 --> 00:13:22,200
Well, I do have the advantage of living here.

364
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:23,040
You do.

365
00:13:23,040 --> 00:13:24,040
Well, is it an advantage?

366
00:13:24,040 --> 00:13:30,080
I'm reading the summary of book two and everything's coming back to me now.

367
00:13:30,080 --> 00:13:32,080
It's all coming back to me now.

368
00:13:32,080 --> 00:13:32,920
Yeah.

369
00:13:32,920 --> 00:13:34,880
What a not great time that was.

370
00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:40,520
I mean, there was like no part of me that wanted to read Dallas's book, even by the end of this one.

371
00:13:40,520 --> 00:13:43,440
Austin was literally the only character I cared about.

372
00:13:43,440 --> 00:13:45,200
Oh, he gets fucked up.

373
00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:46,880
I. You know what?

374
00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:50,680
Not to ask you, CK, ED up.

375
00:13:50,680 --> 00:13:58,320
It made me I mean, the worst, the worst time that a dog dies.

376
00:13:58,320 --> 00:14:00,040
Like, what?

377
00:14:00,040 --> 00:14:02,000
What about the dog?

378
00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,800
Oh, my God.

379
00:14:03,800 --> 00:14:09,280
Like, I mean, Beverly Jenkins has like the Cougar eat the villain.

380
00:14:09,280 --> 00:14:11,120
No, no.

381
00:14:11,120 --> 00:14:13,800
The Cougar eats the fucking dog.

382
00:14:13,800 --> 00:14:17,240
Like, you know, what world do I want to read that?

383
00:14:17,240 --> 00:14:19,360
Like, no, no.

384
00:14:19,360 --> 00:14:20,600
And it was also just shitty.

385
00:14:20,600 --> 00:14:23,120
It was so bad. It was not a good book.

386
00:14:23,120 --> 00:14:25,320
Sorry to anyone who likes these books.

387
00:14:25,320 --> 00:14:29,000
I, however, have the worst time for the lot.

388
00:14:29,000 --> 00:14:35,960
Like I. The only reason I gave this one three stars is because I was like, OK,

389
00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:39,640
I also gave Prisoner of My Desires.

390
00:14:39,640 --> 00:14:44,200
The Prisoner of My Desire was compelling enough of a read that even if I didn't

391
00:14:44,200 --> 00:14:49,240
like what was happening, I was invested and I wanted to know what was going to happen.

392
00:14:49,240 --> 00:14:50,680
Yeah. There were multiple times.

393
00:14:50,680 --> 00:14:54,600
Like the only reason I finished this one, I read most of it on a plane

394
00:14:54,600 --> 00:14:56,400
or the audiobook I listened to most of it.

395
00:14:56,400 --> 00:15:00,240
And then it took me days where I would listen to like a few chapters at night.

396
00:15:00,240 --> 00:15:04,320
So I was traveling and I I would get back late and like want to go to bed.

397
00:15:04,320 --> 00:15:06,440
But I was like, hang on, let me work on this book.

398
00:15:06,440 --> 00:15:09,120
But I didn't care about the ending.

399
00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:12,560
Because I was like, you're going to marry this man is what it was.

400
00:15:12,560 --> 00:15:16,480
The ending was not good because I actually I liked the first half.

401
00:15:16,480 --> 00:15:23,120
I thought that he was a very lonely, sad, strange little man.

402
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:28,160
And I enjoyed their whatever the fuck was happening

403
00:15:28,160 --> 00:15:30,720
when he like picked her up from that train station.

404
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:32,760
It felt very Kit McBride.

405
00:15:32,760 --> 00:15:37,720
And then she married his brother because he couldn't be like, no,

406
00:15:37,720 --> 00:15:39,360
maybe don't marry my brother.

407
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:40,960
I actually want to marry you.

408
00:15:40,960 --> 00:15:45,320
And I'm like, OK, this was a million steps too far.

409
00:15:45,320 --> 00:15:48,240
Like everything like convalescing into that.

410
00:15:48,240 --> 00:15:50,080
I was like, OK, no, no, no, no, no, no.

411
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:51,920
That. Yeah, I really can't.

412
00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:53,920
I don't even like.

413
00:15:54,360 --> 00:15:57,000
I mean, I really dislike when they're engaged to the.

414
00:15:57,000 --> 00:15:58,400
I can do it for a little while.

415
00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:00,960
It's not a great plot line for me.

416
00:16:00,960 --> 00:16:04,320
I can do it if it's handled fairly early on.

417
00:16:04,320 --> 00:16:07,080
Like I have read somewhere it's been OK.

418
00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:09,960
But I have also read a lot where I'm like, this is too long.

419
00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:12,200
I don't like it. I need out.

420
00:16:12,200 --> 00:16:13,280
That's what happened.

421
00:16:13,280 --> 00:16:17,160
I read The Prospectors Only Prospect and it was like a five star read

422
00:16:17,480 --> 00:16:19,800
until you got to the third act break up.

423
00:16:19,800 --> 00:16:22,960
And it was. It ruined the book for me.

424
00:16:23,120 --> 00:16:24,520
Like it brought it down to three stars.

425
00:16:24,520 --> 00:16:26,200
I will never reread that book.

426
00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:29,560
Like I have no like compunction to ever visit it again

427
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:34,160
because it was the most senseless, pointless, like I'm engaged

428
00:16:34,160 --> 00:16:37,720
or like mail order bride, technically engaged to the other brother,

429
00:16:37,720 --> 00:16:38,760
falls for the other one.

430
00:16:38,760 --> 00:16:44,400
And then like, oh, in some great act of, I don't know, like kindness,

431
00:16:44,400 --> 00:16:47,720
you just like, oh, yeah, go marry the other one that you have no relationship with.

432
00:16:47,720 --> 00:16:51,560
But you were technically like with them first because you wrote a letter.

433
00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:54,040
Like, no, no, no, no, no.

434
00:16:54,040 --> 00:16:57,960
Like, yeah, it's not my favorite plot line.

435
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:01,600
And it just it took.

436
00:17:01,600 --> 00:17:05,320
I mean, I mean, I guess Lorraine Heath will go that far.

437
00:17:05,360 --> 00:17:09,000
And she did. I mean, she will. But they got married.

438
00:17:10,040 --> 00:17:14,280
I even like it's the whole like speak now element of it all.

439
00:17:14,280 --> 00:17:17,960
Like he just said, but like the thing I can't even

440
00:17:17,960 --> 00:17:21,680
I don't even like when it gets that far, with the exception of like an island princess.

441
00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:26,280
And it was like the only book where that was like an actually like fun way to do it.

442
00:17:26,880 --> 00:17:29,280
Right. Any other time.

443
00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:31,400
And this is true of like movies. Yeah.

444
00:17:31,400 --> 00:17:35,520
Romcoms. I mean, if we get to the wedding, I'm like, it's too late now.

445
00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:37,880
You have lost your chance. Yeah.

446
00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:42,560
When the ratings that I felt at that plot line, I was like, absolutely not.

447
00:17:42,560 --> 00:17:44,120
You've gone way too far. Yeah.

448
00:17:44,120 --> 00:17:46,320
Oh, yeah. We could I handled this way before now.

449
00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:49,920
And it still could have had the drama of like you were engaged to somebody else

450
00:17:49,920 --> 00:17:51,240
and now you're calling it off.

451
00:17:51,240 --> 00:17:53,240
It just didn't have to happen at the wedding.

452
00:17:53,240 --> 00:17:55,400
And they didn't have to go through with it.

453
00:17:55,400 --> 00:17:57,200
It's married.

454
00:17:57,200 --> 00:18:01,360
What was the solution? Did it was it a divorce?

455
00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:05,480
Yeah. Yeah. They got like they annulled it because they hadn't had sex yet.

456
00:18:05,480 --> 00:18:06,960
Oh, that's right. OK. Yeah.

457
00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:11,520
But also, what a stupid like

458
00:18:12,320 --> 00:18:15,120
I was so angry.

459
00:18:15,120 --> 00:18:18,920
Like, again, like I enjoyed them on the road together,

460
00:18:18,920 --> 00:18:22,760
like all situations that like put them on the road again.

461
00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:25,240
They really were like all of the force proximity.

462
00:18:25,240 --> 00:18:27,080
There was a sexy snake bite.

463
00:18:27,080 --> 00:18:30,680
He had an eye patch like there.

464
00:18:30,680 --> 00:18:31,960
There were things.

465
00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:34,520
I didn't think the snake bite was sexy.

466
00:18:34,520 --> 00:18:36,240
He like sucked her. I thought it was sexy.

467
00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,760
I was like, you know what? Honestly, fair enough.

468
00:18:38,760 --> 00:18:41,320
I'd get bitten by a snake if it really like meant.

469
00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:46,440
For anybody who watched or is familiar with a very Potter musical.

470
00:18:48,040 --> 00:18:50,480
Yes. No. Was that a yes, you are familiar.

471
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:51,920
I think I've seen it. OK.

472
00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:57,080
Well, the knows the production company, Team StarKid, that put that on.

473
00:18:57,440 --> 00:18:59,600
I was a big fan of theirs for many years.

474
00:18:59,600 --> 00:19:02,880
And my production company in college started

475
00:19:02,880 --> 00:19:06,040
because we really wanted to do another show of theirs called The Trail to Oregon,

476
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:09,480
which is based on the video game.

477
00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:14,280
Yeah. So it was like an interactive musical where at the beginning it was like five.

478
00:19:17,120 --> 00:19:19,040
Five, six actors.

479
00:19:19,040 --> 00:19:21,040
One, two, three, four, five. Yeah. Six actors.

480
00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:22,480
Five family members.

481
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:25,200
One of the family members doubled as like one of the bad guys

482
00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:28,800
and one guy who played the villain and also literally every other character in the show.

483
00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:33,840
At the beginning of the show, audience members got to choose the family's names.

484
00:19:35,440 --> 00:19:39,760
And then at intermission, they voted which one of the family was going to die of dysentery.

485
00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:45,280
So I vote everyone in the series dies of dysentery.

486
00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:48,720
So I played the mom and the dad's an idiot.

487
00:19:48,720 --> 00:19:51,760
I was like the only I was the straight man, like the only logical person.

488
00:19:51,760 --> 00:19:59,120
And there is a scene where he had to seduce me into this child size Scooby Doo sleeping bag that we had.

489
00:20:00,320 --> 00:20:01,920
And I'm like, OK, fine.

490
00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:04,560
And as soon as I get in, I get bit by a snake.

491
00:20:04,560 --> 00:20:09,520
And we had this like stuffed snake that I would hold to my leg and I would scream and be like,

492
00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:11,200
it's a snake. Get it off, get it off.

493
00:20:11,200 --> 00:20:13,760
So he rips it off. And I'm like, you have to suck the poison out.

494
00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:17,040
And he like so first he has to like kiss his way up my leg.

495
00:20:17,040 --> 00:20:18,960
And I'm like, what the hell are you doing?

496
00:20:18,960 --> 00:20:20,960
And he's like, I don't know, is this working for you?

497
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:23,440
And I'm like, no, get the poison out of my leg.

498
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:25,920
And he being an idiot does suck the poison out.

499
00:20:25,920 --> 00:20:27,280
And I'm like, oh, thank you so much.

500
00:20:27,280 --> 00:20:27,920
You saved me.

501
00:20:27,920 --> 00:20:29,040
And then he swallows.

502
00:20:33,040 --> 00:20:37,360
And then he has like a hallucinatory song and we all think he's dead.

503
00:20:39,120 --> 00:20:44,320
And and that is all I could think of when he was doing that.

504
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:48,000
I was like, I'm not supposed to swallow it.

505
00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:52,240
I know he didn't, but I think it would have been more fun if he did, frankly.

506
00:20:52,240 --> 00:20:54,080
I actually can't tell you that he didn't.

507
00:20:54,080 --> 00:20:55,600
So honestly, this is my can.

508
00:20:55,600 --> 00:20:57,200
No, he was sucking and spitting.

509
00:20:57,200 --> 00:20:58,000
Oh, good for him.

510
00:20:58,560 --> 00:20:59,040
He's not.

511
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,480
Well, anyway, welcome to RopePancer TBR.

512
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:14,320
It's been 20 good minutes with your favorite host, Hannah.

513
00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:15,520
And I'm Caroline.

514
00:21:15,520 --> 00:21:25,440
Yeah, I I just know part of me wants to see the heroine marry.

515
00:21:25,440 --> 00:21:29,680
No, the brother, the hero, like fully married.

516
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:31,360
Like I just I don't.

517
00:21:31,360 --> 00:21:34,640
And it was like 60 percent like it was like there was still book left.

518
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:38,080
Like you still had to like deal with that stuff.

519
00:21:39,040 --> 00:21:42,960
Yeah, I just I don't I don't know.

520
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:44,000
I don't get it.

521
00:21:45,120 --> 00:21:46,240
I didn't like Dallas.

522
00:21:46,880 --> 00:21:50,240
I didn't like even the little like, oh, this is what actually happened.

523
00:21:50,240 --> 00:21:52,560
I was like, OK, and still don't like Dallas.

524
00:21:52,560 --> 00:21:53,200
No.

525
00:21:56,320 --> 00:21:59,840
I didn't dislike Houston except for the whole Confederacy thing.

526
00:21:59,840 --> 00:22:02,480
But I also didn't like Houston.

527
00:22:02,480 --> 00:22:03,840
It was a mark against him.

528
00:22:03,840 --> 00:22:05,840
Yeah, but I also didn't really like him.

529
00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:09,680
She was kind of annoying by the end of that book where I was like, duh.

530
00:22:11,200 --> 00:22:14,320
I mean, she was annoying towards the beginning, too, but I could kind of deal with it.

531
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:16,400
But then she just kind of kept going.

532
00:22:16,400 --> 00:22:18,960
And I hesitate to call heroines annoying, by the way,

533
00:22:18,960 --> 00:22:21,600
because I think they get called that way too frequently.

534
00:22:22,720 --> 00:22:25,680
But this one, I truly was like, I can't.

535
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:31,840
I didn't really care about their romance, if I'm being honest.

536
00:22:31,840 --> 00:22:36,560
Well, I like I get like I liked the first half and then it was just so long.

537
00:22:37,360 --> 00:22:40,400
Yeah, I think I like the first quarter.

538
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:43,360
I liked the setup and then I was like, OK, guys.

539
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:44,560
Yeah.

540
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:47,920
Well, because again, like the potential for like the mail order,

541
00:22:47,920 --> 00:22:52,640
Brad, like and like whatever to my brother and then like the other one like falls for.

542
00:22:53,440 --> 00:22:56,880
Like it can work, but this was just not an example.

543
00:22:56,880 --> 00:23:04,000
Unfortunately, I just I mean, like. I just.

544
00:23:04,960 --> 00:23:06,720
I'd like to see Amy Berry do it.

545
00:23:07,360 --> 00:23:09,680
I really know that's not the setup for Bo's book,

546
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:13,920
but I would like one who like the brother sends away for a mail order bride.

547
00:23:13,920 --> 00:23:16,640
Yeah, so that he's actually looking right.

548
00:23:16,640 --> 00:23:18,720
And she's one of the other brothers.

549
00:23:18,720 --> 00:23:19,840
I think it could work.

550
00:23:19,840 --> 00:23:21,600
There'd be zero confederacy.

551
00:23:21,600 --> 00:23:22,880
There would be zero confederacy.

552
00:23:22,880 --> 00:23:26,080
All the brides are like fun enough that I don't think it would be like,

553
00:23:26,080 --> 00:23:27,680
oh, no, this might ruin that relationship.

554
00:23:27,680 --> 00:23:29,920
I would love that for the missing twin.

555
00:23:30,560 --> 00:23:31,520
Oh, I.

556
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:31,760
Yeah.

557
00:23:32,720 --> 00:23:33,840
Because we're getting about the missing.

558
00:23:33,840 --> 00:23:34,240
Right.

559
00:23:34,240 --> 00:23:35,840
Because we've got no attachment.

560
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:40,560
We've got no like nothing besides like loving him because he's like part of kid or whatever.

561
00:23:40,560 --> 00:23:44,320
So like I would love him to be like, oh, yes, I want my little love story.

562
00:23:44,320 --> 00:23:47,440
And then to have something better than this book happened to him.

563
00:23:49,440 --> 00:23:50,960
Doesn't deserve this book.

564
00:23:50,960 --> 00:23:54,880
He's been, I don't know, separated from his family for years.

565
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:57,440
Presumed dead, gone through a lot of shit.

566
00:23:57,440 --> 00:23:59,440
I'm assuming he's got to be alive.

567
00:23:59,440 --> 00:24:00,560
We've been through this before.

568
00:24:00,560 --> 00:24:06,000
There is no way she keeps mentioning this long lost twin brother and he's not alive.

569
00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,880
I just I hope not the Chekhov's twin brother.

570
00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:14,240
Can you imagine the series ends?

571
00:24:14,240 --> 00:24:16,080
Oh, yeah, he's actually like we found his bum.

572
00:24:16,080 --> 00:24:17,120
We found his body.

573
00:24:17,120 --> 00:24:18,800
He was he was in the garden.

574
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:22,720
There's a record of him being buried in this random churchyard somewhere.

575
00:24:22,720 --> 00:24:25,280
Yeah, so I'm holding out hope for him.

576
00:24:25,280 --> 00:24:26,560
For a hero, if you will.

577
00:24:26,560 --> 00:24:28,320
For I'm holding out for a hero.

578
00:24:30,320 --> 00:24:35,600
And I need him to be what Houston was not.

579
00:24:36,640 --> 00:24:37,440
None of that.

580
00:24:37,440 --> 00:24:38,320
I mean, you're right.

581
00:24:38,320 --> 00:24:40,320
Like Austin, he had the potential.

582
00:24:41,040 --> 00:24:43,520
And then I mean, OK, spoilers.

583
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:45,680
We we know they're going to happen.

584
00:24:45,680 --> 00:24:47,680
So I don't know.

585
00:24:48,320 --> 00:24:49,920
Literally his book.

586
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:58,720
So he had that whatever girl that you kind of see in Book One and you see her also in Book Two, like the young love situation.

587
00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:00,400
Maybe you didn't see it in Book One.

588
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:02,240
I don't think I don't think so.

589
00:25:02,240 --> 00:25:03,040
Amazing.

590
00:25:03,040 --> 00:25:04,000
Fabulous.

591
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:05,280
So I don't remember.

592
00:25:05,280 --> 00:25:08,240
So he had like it was she was like a shopkeeper's daughter.

593
00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:09,760
Oh, yeah, I don't think we.

594
00:25:09,760 --> 00:25:10,320
Yeah, OK.

595
00:25:10,320 --> 00:25:11,520
So it must have been in Book Two.

596
00:25:11,520 --> 00:25:13,600
So he like had a little romance with her.

597
00:25:14,880 --> 00:25:17,120
You find out that they had like sex.

598
00:25:17,120 --> 00:25:27,680
And then on that night, the villain from Book Two, who was maybe part of the don't don't quote me on that.

599
00:25:27,680 --> 00:25:29,440
The villain was murdered.

600
00:25:29,440 --> 00:25:33,440
OK, so some some man who was a bad person was murdered.

601
00:25:33,440 --> 00:25:41,280
And Austin doesn't have an alibi because it would have meant ruining her reputation because they were fornicating under the stars.

602
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:51,520
And so he decides to go to jail for a cool five years rather than say, oh, yeah, I was canoodling with the shopkeeper's daughter.

603
00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:57,760
So he just goes to jail at the end of Book Two and you have to be OK with it.

604
00:25:57,760 --> 00:26:00,320
I was not. I was not OK with it.

605
00:26:00,320 --> 00:26:04,000
So then you open Book Three with this man.

606
00:26:04,000 --> 00:26:04,720
Now, he's a man.

607
00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:06,560
He's not a cute little fresh boy.

608
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:09,280
He's a he's a dirty boy.

609
00:26:09,280 --> 00:26:20,400
He's a dirty boy because he's been in jail and he's got a chip on his shoulder, rightfully so, but also of his own making because he voluntarily went to jail for murder that he didn't commit.

610
00:26:20,400 --> 00:26:29,360
And like he he's rightfully angry when she has married his best friend.

611
00:26:29,360 --> 00:26:33,120
And he's like, well, that was really shitty.

612
00:26:33,120 --> 00:26:38,560
So I'm going to go have a little emo walk on that emo journey of his.

613
00:26:38,560 --> 00:26:48,800
He stumbles upon this traumatic ass backstory of the heroine whose entire family was murdered in front of her.

614
00:26:48,800 --> 00:26:50,400
She was left for dead.

615
00:26:50,400 --> 00:26:51,840
She was shot.

616
00:26:51,840 --> 00:26:56,320
Her brother was strung up by the rafters, murdered in front of her.

617
00:26:56,320 --> 00:26:57,760
Her parents were shot.

618
00:26:57,760 --> 00:27:03,920
And she's just been living in this house with her dog trying to make the best of a terrible situation.

619
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:04,960
He comes in.

620
00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:06,800
They have sex.

621
00:27:06,800 --> 00:27:09,440
She's a virgin like they have like right away.

622
00:27:09,440 --> 00:27:17,440
She's like, wow, let me go have sex with this man who I actually probably can't even trust.

623
00:27:17,440 --> 00:27:18,480
But he looks right.

624
00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:20,000
So let's do it.

625
00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:21,760
And then she gets pregnant.

626
00:27:21,760 --> 00:27:25,920
Her dog gets eaten by a wildcat.

627
00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:30,320
They get married because she's pregnant.

628
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:38,960
And I have no clue why poor sweet little Austin had to have that because I hated him in that book.

629
00:27:38,960 --> 00:27:41,600
He was not a good person.

630
00:27:41,600 --> 00:27:47,200
Nothing about his journey was great or good.

631
00:27:47,200 --> 00:27:54,880
And she just, he just, it was like, what?

632
00:27:54,880 --> 00:27:58,480
And then her backstory was so traumatic.

633
00:27:58,480 --> 00:28:00,480
Like book two got sad.

634
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:02,720
Book two got really fucking sad by the end.

635
00:28:02,720 --> 00:28:07,520
Like, like my Goodreads thing is like, wow, when I said this was boring, I didn't mean

636
00:28:07,520 --> 00:28:09,760
for it to get this fucking sad.

637
00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:14,480
And then you go into book three and it's exponentially worse.

638
00:28:14,480 --> 00:28:17,520
So like, I just don't.

639
00:28:17,520 --> 00:28:21,440
I mean, is that, I mean, I just, I don't know.

640
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:22,720
I don't know why.

641
00:28:22,720 --> 00:28:24,480
Why?

642
00:28:24,480 --> 00:28:25,440
Why is my question.

643
00:28:25,440 --> 00:28:26,640
Why?

644
00:28:26,640 --> 00:28:28,240
You know?

645
00:28:28,240 --> 00:28:39,840
Like, poor Austin, the sweetest little boy.

646
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:42,480
I have no answers for you.

647
00:28:42,480 --> 00:28:43,920
Me neither.

648
00:28:43,920 --> 00:28:46,160
Me neither.

649
00:28:46,160 --> 00:28:50,560
I call me Ariel because I have no words.

650
00:28:50,560 --> 00:28:56,800
I got nothing.

651
00:28:56,800 --> 00:28:59,840
I right here in River City.

652
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:04,160
Is that a reference to something?

653
00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:05,160
Yes.

654
00:29:05,160 --> 00:29:06,160
Cool.

655
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:07,600
Music man, the music man.

656
00:29:07,600 --> 00:29:09,380
We've got trouble.

657
00:29:09,380 --> 00:29:10,680
Right here in River City.

658
00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:16,180
Well, we do have trouble right here in this podcast.

659
00:29:16,180 --> 00:29:19,720
I just, it just got consistently worse.

660
00:29:19,720 --> 00:29:22,080
And worse and worse.

661
00:29:22,080 --> 00:29:25,860
And like Lorraine Heath, you did this to me?

662
00:29:25,860 --> 00:29:27,860
Question mark.

663
00:29:28,140 --> 00:29:31,860
My Lorraine Heath of the Guerrilla Twinswap book?

664
00:29:32,300 --> 00:29:37,980
Of the once more my darling with a giant-ass dragon tattoo on his back book?

665
00:29:37,980 --> 00:29:39,980
You did this to him.

666
00:29:40,580 --> 00:29:41,860
Like what?

667
00:29:41,860 --> 00:29:46,060
I mean if there's one thing- I've only read the one- the Guerrilla Twinswap, so I-

668
00:29:46,180 --> 00:29:51,180
But I feel confident based on the summaries of the books of hers that I know if there's one thing

669
00:29:51,860 --> 00:29:54,420
Lorraine Heath will do, it's commit.

670
00:29:54,420 --> 00:29:56,420
It is commit.

671
00:29:56,420 --> 00:30:00,980
Yond the point where any other author going where no authors dare to go.

672
00:30:00,980 --> 00:30:02,980
This is uncharted waters.

673
00:30:02,980 --> 00:30:04,980
I'm not the hot kind.

674
00:30:04,980 --> 00:30:06,980
Not the hot kind?

675
00:30:06,980 --> 00:30:08,980
This is the- this is the

676
00:30:09,980 --> 00:30:13,180
Davy Jones locker kind. Like what?

677
00:30:13,180 --> 00:30:17,740
What? I...

678
00:30:20,340 --> 00:30:23,780
Like there was just- there was so much there, I think

679
00:30:25,220 --> 00:30:27,940
with the setup of that first novel.

680
00:30:29,300 --> 00:30:35,420
And then she was just like why don't I create the most toxic environment possible?

681
00:30:36,660 --> 00:30:38,460
And she did.

682
00:30:38,460 --> 00:30:40,460
She really did.

683
00:30:40,460 --> 00:30:42,100
She did.

684
00:30:42,100 --> 00:30:44,100
I mean just my like-

685
00:30:44,700 --> 00:30:46,700
my descent into hell

686
00:30:47,620 --> 00:30:49,620
was not great.

687
00:30:52,940 --> 00:30:57,220
When you said descent, I thought you meant descent like D-I-S-S.

688
00:30:57,220 --> 00:30:59,220
And like a-

689
00:30:59,620 --> 00:31:00,620
My descent.

690
00:31:00,620 --> 00:31:05,420
Just my descent and I was like true. I also would like to write a descent.

691
00:31:07,140 --> 00:31:09,140
Our descent as well.

692
00:31:09,140 --> 00:31:11,140
You know like the minority.

693
00:31:11,140 --> 00:31:13,860
Yeah, because honestly the majority. Let's look on Goodreads.

694
00:31:13,860 --> 00:31:18,460
3.99 out of 5.

695
00:31:18,460 --> 00:31:21,660
7,346 ratings.

696
00:31:21,660 --> 00:31:23,660
548 reviews.

697
00:31:25,060 --> 00:31:27,060
And...

698
00:31:28,260 --> 00:31:29,940
What?

699
00:31:29,940 --> 00:31:32,940
Our descent. This is our descent. You've heard it now.

700
00:31:32,940 --> 00:31:33,940
You've heard it.

701
00:31:33,940 --> 00:31:35,940
I didn't care for the romance.

702
00:31:35,940 --> 00:31:42,020
I feel like she somehow- we spent so much time with them on the trail and yet

703
00:31:42,020 --> 00:31:44,020
it was awful.

704
00:31:44,020 --> 00:31:47,020
I felt like I knew so little about-

705
00:31:47,020 --> 00:31:54,500
Yeah, because the second half could have been them getting to where they were supposed to go and actually getting to know each other.

706
00:31:55,100 --> 00:31:56,540
But it wasn't.

707
00:31:56,540 --> 00:32:02,380
Yeah, it almost felt like- I mean you know in books when they'll do like a time jump and the author is like

708
00:32:02,380 --> 00:32:06,700
they've talked so much and gotten to know each other and it's like well that's the part I wanted to read.

709
00:32:06,860 --> 00:32:11,060
She somehow gave us that but also didn't. Like I don't know- it was bizarre.

710
00:32:11,060 --> 00:32:17,780
I like- we got them talking a little bit, but I guess because Houston talked so little except when she was asking him questions like-

711
00:32:17,780 --> 00:32:19,300
Yeah.

712
00:32:19,300 --> 00:32:21,300
I felt like there was more

713
00:32:22,140 --> 00:32:24,140
like traveling and

714
00:32:25,180 --> 00:32:31,020
like other things going on where I like- I was like do you actually know each other? Like you told me you do but

715
00:32:31,020 --> 00:32:34,660
it doesn't really feel like it to me.

716
00:32:37,260 --> 00:32:39,980
Well, I just- I just can't abide a

717
00:32:41,100 --> 00:32:45,420
romance hero and heroin or just romance couple in general.

718
00:32:46,580 --> 00:32:51,180
Getting through over half of the book and then marry

719
00:32:52,140 --> 00:32:54,140
someone else and letting that happen.

720
00:32:55,620 --> 00:33:00,180
Like what- like bro, you don't deserve her. Like you don't-

721
00:33:00,180 --> 00:33:03,900
You don't deserve whatever ending you get that's happy

722
00:33:04,620 --> 00:33:11,500
because you let her marry someone else. You didn't jump on his back and rip out his hair. You didn't speak violence.

723
00:33:12,260 --> 00:33:14,260
You just- you didn't speak at all.

724
00:33:14,940 --> 00:33:16,940
Like I-

725
00:33:16,940 --> 00:33:18,940
I just- I-

726
00:33:19,860 --> 00:33:21,860
Yeah.

727
00:33:22,540 --> 00:33:24,540
I tried. I really did.

728
00:33:24,540 --> 00:33:25,820
Not that-

729
00:33:25,820 --> 00:33:30,500
Look speaking out only applies to women because men don't need to be speaking.

730
00:33:30,500 --> 00:33:31,220
That is true.

731
00:33:31,220 --> 00:33:34,420
However, I will say this was the exception or I was like-

732
00:33:34,420 --> 00:33:35,660
Yeah.

733
00:33:35,660 --> 00:33:38,180
My guy. You waited too long.

734
00:33:38,180 --> 00:33:46,860
Well, yeah, and then the Austin had the run-in with like the thieves who then stole the horse and he's like my- the horse died and then he's like oh that's sad.

735
00:33:47,340 --> 00:33:51,820
And I'm like, it was just- I was just like there's just so much like I don't need to deal with it.

736
00:33:53,060 --> 00:33:55,060
It's like I've been a wall.

737
00:33:55,060 --> 00:33:58,860
And it's not the hot chiseled ab kind of wall.

738
00:34:00,100 --> 00:34:02,900
It's just a brick wall. I've hit it.

739
00:34:03,460 --> 00:34:08,380
And I'm concussed and not particularly happy.

740
00:34:09,500 --> 00:34:11,500
I just-

741
00:34:11,500 --> 00:34:18,900
Yeah, honestly, I'm taking it down to two stars. I thought I did- like I was like I knew- but you're right.

742
00:34:19,660 --> 00:34:24,260
I could probably go back and re-Prisoner of my Desire and catch things that I didn't catch before

743
00:34:24,260 --> 00:34:28,380
and like maybe go further into the nuance of their relationship.

744
00:34:29,180 --> 00:34:31,180
This one, there's nothing.

745
00:34:31,940 --> 00:34:38,100
I even- like there were the parts where she would read his letters over and over and I was honestly kind of hoping for a like

746
00:34:38,860 --> 00:34:43,060
Cyrano situation where it was like, oh, Houston wrote all the letters the whole time.

747
00:34:43,060 --> 00:34:45,060
Yeah, that- mmm.

748
00:34:45,260 --> 00:34:50,580
I would have loved it. I would have eaten it up, but instead I'm like, oh no, they were just- they were just Dallas's letters.

749
00:34:50,580 --> 00:34:54,500
She just really liked Dallas's letters, so I don't really understand what we're doing here.

750
00:34:56,020 --> 00:35:01,540
Maybe Amy Berry read this book and was like, yo, fuck that, and then wrote it with Bride.

751
00:35:03,300 --> 00:35:08,900
She was like, I'm going to invent a mail-order bride situation that is so much more fun and romantic.

752
00:35:08,900 --> 00:35:13,780
And soft and sweet. Like, I just-

753
00:35:16,100 --> 00:35:19,700
Because I have- I have to assume this is a good one.

754
00:35:19,700 --> 00:35:21,700
I have to assume this would happen with a Crested Cole.

755
00:35:21,700 --> 00:35:23,700
And the prisoner might decide-

756
00:35:24,900 --> 00:35:30,020
I think she read that, but it was like, fuck that. Let's write something better and sexier.

757
00:35:31,380 --> 00:35:36,500
And she did. And Amy Berry did. Without any sex, might I add you?

758
00:35:37,540 --> 00:35:44,500
Like, I just- I might. I did. I do. Like, at what cost?

759
00:35:44,500 --> 00:35:50,500
Like, I've successfully blocked out like 80% of the series, but the 20% that's still there is persistent.

760
00:35:50,500 --> 00:35:52,500
Psychic damage, truly.

761
00:35:52,500 --> 00:35:54,500
Psychic damage.

762
00:35:54,500 --> 00:36:00,500
Every single time she was like, well, my father on the plantation, I was like, on the plantation?

763
00:36:00,500 --> 00:36:08,500
And she like used it as like an equal, like, trauma to some things.

764
00:36:08,500 --> 00:36:10,500
I mean, she did experience sim for real trauma.

765
00:36:10,500 --> 00:36:12,500
Yeah.

766
00:36:12,500 --> 00:36:18,500
And I'm not opposed to discussing the trauma that like, people in the South endured. However,

767
00:36:20,500 --> 00:36:28,500
I just- there were other people who had endured much worse trauma for much longer.

768
00:36:28,500 --> 00:36:34,500
But like, I guess we just don't have like, besides Beverly Jenkins, any real experience with this.

769
00:36:34,500 --> 00:36:42,500
I just was not expecting them not to be like staunchly anti-slavery.

770
00:36:42,500 --> 00:36:44,500
You know?

771
00:36:44,500 --> 00:36:46,500
That's why I avoid old school Western.

772
00:36:46,500 --> 00:36:48,500
Exactly.

773
00:36:48,500 --> 00:36:50,500
I mean, we needed to include one for the old school school of it all.

774
00:36:50,500 --> 00:36:54,500
And we're going to get probably another one with the flame in the flower.

775
00:36:54,500 --> 00:36:56,500
Sure.

776
00:36:56,500 --> 00:36:58,500
Because I mean, it's right on the-

777
00:36:58,500 --> 00:37:02,500
That back summary, when I read that, I was like, holy shit.

778
00:37:02,500 --> 00:37:04,500
It's rough.

779
00:37:04,500 --> 00:37:06,500
I mean, I am not.

780
00:37:06,500 --> 00:37:08,500
I mean-

781
00:37:08,500 --> 00:37:12,500
We knew going in. We're reading historic texts, right?

782
00:37:12,500 --> 00:37:18,500
I'm just so used to reading recent stuff that like, deals with it and like addresses it and like,

783
00:37:18,500 --> 00:37:22,500
opposes it on page.

784
00:37:22,500 --> 00:37:26,500
It just opposed the like, nuisance that freedom-

785
00:37:26,500 --> 00:37:28,500
It did oppose the nuisance.

786
00:37:28,500 --> 00:37:30,500
That freedom like, posed to them.

787
00:37:30,500 --> 00:37:34,500
But also just like, even if you had taken that out, I still didn't like this book.

788
00:37:34,500 --> 00:37:36,500
No.

789
00:37:36,500 --> 00:37:38,500
So I can't even be like, oh well, you know, mine is good.

790
00:37:38,500 --> 00:37:40,500
No.

791
00:37:40,500 --> 00:37:42,500
I just straight up didn't like it.

792
00:37:42,500 --> 00:37:48,500
And it made it worse because the whole time I would be like, I'm not rooting for you.

793
00:37:48,500 --> 00:37:50,500
Because like, I just-

794
00:37:50,500 --> 00:37:52,500
Not everyone deserves an AGA.

795
00:37:52,500 --> 00:37:54,500
No.

796
00:37:54,500 --> 00:37:58,500
Especially if you can't even stop a wedding for it.

797
00:37:58,500 --> 00:38:00,500
I-

798
00:38:00,500 --> 00:38:04,500
It just was such a-

799
00:38:04,500 --> 00:38:08,500
3.99% increase.

800
00:38:08,500 --> 00:38:12,500
Like, what book did they read?

801
00:38:12,500 --> 00:38:16,500
I don't know.

802
00:38:16,500 --> 00:38:22,500
Because truly, and I had already known because you had told me that it goes way too far in the third act.

803
00:38:22,500 --> 00:38:24,500
So I already knew they were going to get married.

804
00:38:24,500 --> 00:38:26,500
And somehow still, I was like-

805
00:38:26,500 --> 00:38:28,500
I cannot believe that they got married.

806
00:38:28,500 --> 00:38:30,500
Like, how do you come out of this?

807
00:38:30,500 --> 00:38:32,500
And it just took-

808
00:38:32,500 --> 00:38:38,500
I'm like, also like, Houston, where was your Speak Now era when we needed it?

809
00:38:38,500 --> 00:38:42,500
But also, Amelia, you know you're in love with this other guy.

810
00:38:42,500 --> 00:38:44,500
Like at a certain point, I don't know.

811
00:38:44,500 --> 00:38:46,500
She committed.

812
00:38:46,500 --> 00:38:48,500
She committed to the-

813
00:38:48,500 --> 00:38:52,500
I mean, she seriously was like, I'm going to marry somebody.

814
00:38:52,500 --> 00:38:54,500
Like, I'm here, I'm going to marry-

815
00:38:54,500 --> 00:38:56,500
But like, I don't know.

816
00:38:56,500 --> 00:39:00,500
I feel like she also just knows.

817
00:39:00,500 --> 00:39:02,500
Yeah.

818
00:39:02,500 --> 00:39:10,500
Because even in the second marrying off Morgan McBride, where it veered into a little bit too long and a little bit too random.

819
00:39:10,500 --> 00:39:14,500
She didn't marry him when he was being a dick.

820
00:39:14,500 --> 00:39:16,500
And she didn't settle.

821
00:39:16,500 --> 00:39:22,500
She went to go work in the town and made it for herself and was doing her thing.

822
00:39:22,500 --> 00:39:28,500
She just, in this one, just married the brother.

823
00:39:28,500 --> 00:39:30,500
And I'm like, I get that this is your whole-

824
00:39:30,500 --> 00:39:32,500
This is everything you have left.

825
00:39:32,500 --> 00:39:36,500
You're dedicating your dream to somebody, whatever.

826
00:39:36,500 --> 00:39:42,500
But like, I was just so annoyed with her for not standing up for her own-

827
00:39:42,500 --> 00:39:44,500
I mean, I guess to a certain extent she did.

828
00:39:44,500 --> 00:39:48,500
She was asking him to say something.

829
00:39:48,500 --> 00:39:50,500
But I-

830
00:39:50,500 --> 00:39:56,500
I respect that grind of being so stubborn that you're going to want to make him suffer.

831
00:39:56,500 --> 00:40:01,500
But I also don't respect that grind because it made me suffer.

832
00:40:01,500 --> 00:40:09,500
I just feel like before the wedding, for me to respect Amelia, I would have needed her to before the wedding go to Dallas and be like, I'm going to level with you.

833
00:40:09,500 --> 00:40:12,500
He didn't touch me, but I'm in love with your brother.

834
00:40:12,500 --> 00:40:21,500
The conversation that she and Dallas had before where he's like, you can go talk to him and do what you want to do, essentially.

835
00:40:21,500 --> 00:40:24,500
If he wants to marry you and you want to do that, I'll get the annulment, whatever.

836
00:40:24,500 --> 00:40:29,500
I would have liked that conversation even the night before the wedding or something.

837
00:40:29,500 --> 00:40:32,500
Where Amelia is like, fuck it.

838
00:40:32,500 --> 00:40:33,500
Whereas-

839
00:40:33,500 --> 00:40:34,500
I'm going to do what I want to do.

840
00:40:34,500 --> 00:40:37,500
I mean, we're using Kit McBride as like, I don't know-

841
00:40:37,500 --> 00:40:39,500
Because that was a good Western-

842
00:40:39,500 --> 00:40:43,500
Yeah, whereas Morgan in book one, it was a total joke to him.

843
00:40:43,500 --> 00:40:48,500
Flirting with Maddie, doing all of that was just a joke to set off Kit.

844
00:40:48,500 --> 00:40:50,500
He was never going to marry her.

845
00:40:50,500 --> 00:40:58,500
Obviously, she wasn't intended for him, which I guess is that kind of issue that we didn't have in that series, thank God.

846
00:40:58,500 --> 00:41:02,500
But it was just fun.

847
00:41:02,500 --> 00:41:04,500
And this wasn't fun.

848
00:41:04,500 --> 00:41:06,500
I mean, I don't think it was meant to be fun.

849
00:41:06,500 --> 00:41:07,500
It was meant to be angsty, but I didn't-

850
00:41:07,500 --> 00:41:08,500
I know.

851
00:41:08,500 --> 00:41:14,500
I like angst, but this was not angst that I felt was justified or enjoyable.

852
00:41:14,500 --> 00:41:24,500
I would have just loved for her to just be like Fiona and Shrek, get a cave, get a large piece of wood,

853
00:41:24,500 --> 00:41:30,500
put it in front of the cave door, maybe a little bit of a boulder, turn it into an ogre for a little bit,

854
00:41:30,500 --> 00:41:33,500
and be a little bit angry.

855
00:41:33,500 --> 00:41:35,500
And then that's the book.

856
00:41:35,500 --> 00:41:38,500
I don't know, she just married his brother.

857
00:41:38,500 --> 00:41:39,500
I mean, I get it.

858
00:41:39,500 --> 00:41:45,500
She was like, I'm here to marry somebody, and if you're not going to stand up for it, then fine, I'll go through with the plan to marry Dallas.

859
00:41:45,500 --> 00:41:46,500
But like-

860
00:41:46,500 --> 00:41:51,500
I mean, now that we're thinking, Shrek is just the better version of this, really.

861
00:41:51,500 --> 00:41:54,500
I mean, oh, you know what?

862
00:41:54,500 --> 00:41:56,500
If we're doing something.

863
00:41:56,500 --> 00:42:02,500
She wasn't- why is that literally the same plot line, except that Farquaad and Shrek aren't brothers?

864
00:42:02,500 --> 00:42:04,500
Because she was so determined.

865
00:42:04,500 --> 00:42:09,500
She's like, I'm going to fucking do this, because I've been stuck in this tower for my entire life, and I'm pissed off.

866
00:42:09,500 --> 00:42:11,500
And she- yeah.

867
00:42:11,500 --> 00:42:12,500
No, you're so right.

868
00:42:12,500 --> 00:42:13,500
Right?

869
00:42:13,500 --> 00:42:14,500
Okay.

870
00:42:14,500 --> 00:42:19,500
Guys, why would you read Texas Destiny when you could just watch Shrek?

871
00:42:19,500 --> 00:42:22,500
And it comes with a sick soundtrack, so like-

872
00:42:22,500 --> 00:42:24,500
An amazing soundtrack.

873
00:42:24,500 --> 00:42:29,500
I mean, I- that entire- they're making- I think they're making another Shrek more power to them.

874
00:42:29,500 --> 00:42:30,500
Another one?

875
00:42:29,500 --> 00:42:30,500
I know.

876
00:42:30,500 --> 00:42:34,500
I know the most recent- I don't think I saw either the last two.

877
00:42:34,500 --> 00:42:36,500
They slapped in different ways.

878
00:42:36,500 --> 00:42:46,500
They didn't slap like Shrek 1 or Shrek 2, but I'm always gonna- I'm always gonna pour one out for that green guy, you know?

879
00:42:46,500 --> 00:42:48,500
Not that green guy.

880
00:42:48,500 --> 00:42:49,500
Green guy.

881
00:42:49,500 --> 00:42:57,500
And really, stop this podcast, stop reading this book, and watch Shrek.

882
00:42:57,500 --> 00:43:01,500
It really will give you what you need to know, like she never- she doesn't go through with it.

883
00:43:01,500 --> 00:43:06,500
He gets a dragon, he gets through the window, he disrupts the wedding.

884
00:43:06,500 --> 00:43:10,500
Like, that's the kind of angst that we want with the whole wedding thing.

885
00:43:10,500 --> 00:43:11,500
It's true.

886
00:43:11,500 --> 00:43:12,500
You know?

887
00:43:12,500 --> 00:43:13,500
Like, it worked.

888
00:43:13,500 --> 00:43:16,500
I mean, they had the hallelujah scene.

889
00:43:16,500 --> 00:43:17,500
Like, there was-

890
00:43:17,500 --> 00:43:25,500
There's even one of the first of the medieval larkinsale, for My Lady's Heart, is also- it's not like he's bringing her to her husband.

891
00:43:25,500 --> 00:43:30,500
She's kind of trying to get away, but then she ends up kind of going back to the marriage that was kind of intended.

892
00:43:30,500 --> 00:43:38,500
So it's not strictly the same, but it is like she falls for this knight who's traveling with her, and then there's a potential husband at the end of it, but-

893
00:43:38,500 --> 00:43:40,500
There are ways to do this.

894
00:43:40,500 --> 00:43:41,500
It was delicious.

895
00:43:41,500 --> 00:43:49,500
That are delicious, that are parfait, layered, things like of the sort.

896
00:43:49,500 --> 00:43:50,500
Everybody likes parfait.

897
00:43:50,500 --> 00:43:51,500
Everybody likes parfait.

898
00:43:51,500 --> 00:43:52,500
And then there's-

899
00:43:52,500 --> 00:43:53,500
I'm making waffles.

900
00:43:53,500 --> 00:43:55,500
This is not waffles.

901
00:43:55,500 --> 00:43:57,500
This is like raisin bran.

902
00:43:57,500 --> 00:44:00,500
Why do you have to slander raisin bran?

903
00:44:00,500 --> 00:44:07,500
I love raisins, but raisin bran was the only one that I could think of that as not universally-

904
00:44:07,500 --> 00:44:08,500
Sure.

905
00:44:08,500 --> 00:44:09,500
Sure.

906
00:44:09,500 --> 00:44:10,500
It's not waffles.

907
00:44:10,500 --> 00:44:23,500
So yeah, really, Shrek is a cowboy, and you're better off with that than this.

908
00:44:23,500 --> 00:44:24,500
It's true.

909
00:44:24,500 --> 00:44:30,500
I just like, why would I read about this cowboy when I could read about Kent Randolph?

910
00:44:30,500 --> 00:44:31,500
Mm-hmm.

911
00:44:31,500 --> 00:44:33,500
I mean-

912
00:44:33,500 --> 00:44:37,500
The ultimate hottest cowboy, if I'm being honest.

913
00:44:37,500 --> 00:44:44,500
I don't even know how you even start that dialogue.

914
00:44:44,500 --> 00:44:48,500
Being like, this book or that book.

915
00:44:48,500 --> 00:44:49,500
You don't.

916
00:44:49,500 --> 00:44:52,500
And then you don't, because it's not a question.

917
00:44:52,500 --> 00:44:54,500
There's no question.

918
00:44:54,500 --> 00:44:55,500
It's just facts.

919
00:44:55,500 --> 00:44:56,500
No.

920
00:44:56,500 --> 00:44:58,500
Ice Spice said it's facts.

921
00:44:58,500 --> 00:44:59,500
It's facts.

922
00:44:59,500 --> 00:45:01,500
That is how I say facts.

923
00:45:01,500 --> 00:45:03,500
I go, facts.

924
00:45:03,500 --> 00:45:05,500
And I think of Ice Spice every single time.

925
00:45:05,500 --> 00:45:06,500
Facts.

926
00:45:06,500 --> 00:45:08,500
That is high comedy.

927
00:45:08,500 --> 00:45:10,500
Just like Shrek.

928
00:45:10,500 --> 00:45:12,500
Just like Shrek.

929
00:45:12,500 --> 00:45:15,500
Because the funniest thing you will ever watch is Shrek 2.

930
00:45:15,500 --> 00:45:16,500
I'm so sorry.

931
00:45:16,500 --> 00:45:18,500
I'm not wearing ladies underwear.

932
00:45:18,500 --> 00:45:20,500
He's wearing ladies underwear.

933
00:45:20,500 --> 00:45:22,500
Come on.

934
00:45:22,500 --> 00:45:24,500
Come on.

935
00:45:24,500 --> 00:45:25,500
You're right.

936
00:45:25,500 --> 00:45:26,500
I know.

937
00:45:26,500 --> 00:45:31,500
It was funny for me as a child because I was like, ha ha, he's wearing ladies underwear.

938
00:45:31,500 --> 00:45:34,500
And it's funny for me now because Nokia was wearing a thong.

939
00:45:34,500 --> 00:45:36,500
And then you learn so much more.

940
00:45:36,500 --> 00:45:37,500
I did not.

941
00:45:37,500 --> 00:45:41,500
The whole Bronco and the O.J. Simpson thing.

942
00:45:41,500 --> 00:45:43,500
I did not know that as a kid.

943
00:45:43,500 --> 00:45:47,500
And then I watched a whole Dateline documentary.

944
00:45:47,500 --> 00:45:49,500
And I watched Shrek 2.

945
00:45:49,500 --> 00:45:51,500
And I was like, oh my god.

946
00:45:51,500 --> 00:45:55,500
And I had none of those epiphanies during this book.

947
00:45:55,500 --> 00:45:58,500
I just had visceral anger.

948
00:45:58,500 --> 00:46:02,500
Absolutely no correlation.

949
00:46:02,500 --> 00:46:08,500
But really, if you need epiphanies, that's what Morgan McBride's book is for.

950
00:46:08,500 --> 00:46:09,500
Yeah.

951
00:46:09,500 --> 00:46:10,500
Like I.

952
00:46:10,500 --> 00:46:13,500
If you haven't read it, the heroine's name is epiphany.

953
00:46:13,500 --> 00:46:14,500
Stop.

954
00:46:14,500 --> 00:46:16,500
This entire book.

955
00:46:16,500 --> 00:46:19,500
Go spend nine hours of your life.

956
00:46:19,500 --> 00:46:31,500
I'm so genuinely like, why would you read this when you could read Michelle McClain's Westerns, the Gunslinger books, Beverly Jenkins or the McBride books?

957
00:46:31,500 --> 00:46:34,500
I just.

958
00:46:34,500 --> 00:46:36,500
There's also one I want to read.

959
00:46:36,500 --> 00:46:39,500
I think it's called They Ain't Proper.

960
00:46:39,500 --> 00:46:49,500
And it's another mail order bride, but it's a non-binary person who ends up like we're trying to order houseplants and a housewife turns up.

961
00:46:49,500 --> 00:46:51,500
I haven't read it.

962
00:46:51,500 --> 00:46:53,500
I just like saw it.

963
00:46:53,500 --> 00:46:54,500
No.

964
00:46:54,500 --> 00:46:57,500
But I was like, they ain't proper.

965
00:46:57,500 --> 00:46:58,500
Noted.

966
00:46:58,500 --> 00:47:00,500
Added to TBR.

967
00:47:00,500 --> 00:47:01,500
I think it's on KU.

968
00:47:01,500 --> 00:47:02,500
Maybe.

969
00:47:02,500 --> 00:47:03,500
I'm not sure.

970
00:47:03,500 --> 00:47:04,500
Sounds.

971
00:47:04,500 --> 00:47:06,500
It doesn't sound like a delightful time.

972
00:47:06,500 --> 00:47:07,500
Yeah.

973
00:47:07,500 --> 00:47:08,500
What did you call?

974
00:47:08,500 --> 00:47:09,500
They aren't.

975
00:47:09,500 --> 00:47:10,500
They ain't proper.

976
00:47:10,500 --> 00:47:13,500
I think is the title, although I could be wrong.

977
00:47:13,500 --> 00:47:15,500
By MB.

978
00:47:15,500 --> 00:47:17,500
Oh, it's this one.

979
00:47:17,500 --> 00:47:18,500
OK.

980
00:47:18,500 --> 00:47:25,500
I've definitely seen the cover published May 18th in twenty twenty three want to read it in that button.

981
00:47:25,500 --> 00:47:26,500
Nope.

982
00:47:25,500 --> 00:47:26,500
Didn't hit it.

983
00:47:26,500 --> 00:47:27,500
No, no.

984
00:47:27,500 --> 00:47:28,500
Wow.

985
00:47:28,500 --> 00:47:30,500
Oh, yeah.

986
00:47:30,500 --> 00:47:33,500
Temper tantrums, blow ups and meltdowns.

987
00:47:33,500 --> 00:47:35,500
Listeners do not quote us on this.

988
00:47:35,500 --> 00:47:37,500
We have not read the book, but sure have not.

989
00:47:37,500 --> 00:47:39,500
But we have read this one.

990
00:47:39,500 --> 00:47:40,500
Don't recommend that.

991
00:47:40,500 --> 00:47:41,500
So true.

992
00:47:41,500 --> 00:47:47,500
There's only so much to say when you only so much and they're Confederates.

993
00:47:47,500 --> 00:47:52,500
I mean, I guess is that like, what is the lesson that we've learned here?

994
00:47:52,500 --> 00:48:02,500
I think the lesson is normally men should not speak, but if she's going to marry your brother, maybe speak now.

995
00:48:02,500 --> 00:48:07,500
That's it.

996
00:48:07,500 --> 00:48:08,500
That's the only lesson I've got.

997
00:48:08,500 --> 00:48:11,500
Sometimes you do have to enter your speak now era.

998
00:48:11,500 --> 00:48:13,500
Like, that's the lesson.

999
00:48:13,500 --> 00:48:17,500
I don't know what else to tell you.

1000
00:48:17,500 --> 00:48:28,500
Like my cheeky ones before the book got bad were iPad stays on during sex, which none of those vibes were had.

1001
00:48:28,500 --> 00:48:30,500
Sorry to inform you.

1002
00:48:30,500 --> 00:48:33,500
Getting bit by a snake can be very sexy.

1003
00:48:33,500 --> 00:48:34,500
I thought so.

1004
00:48:34,500 --> 00:48:35,500
Caroline did not.

1005
00:48:35,500 --> 00:48:39,500
I mean, I could see the like tender at least.

1006
00:48:39,500 --> 00:48:42,500
At least you didn't have to pee on her leg like a jellyfish thing.

1007
00:48:42,500 --> 00:48:44,500
That's actually a myth.

1008
00:48:44,500 --> 00:48:47,500
Well, at least he didn't believe the myth.

1009
00:48:47,500 --> 00:48:48,500
That's true.

1010
00:48:48,500 --> 00:48:51,500
He on her leg anyway, and then had to lick it up.

1011
00:48:51,500 --> 00:48:55,500
Oh, oh, oh, I know.

1012
00:48:55,500 --> 00:48:59,500
Piss kink.

1013
00:48:59,500 --> 00:49:03,500
Um, I'm like looking at my notes.

1014
00:49:03,500 --> 00:49:07,500
So the things I liked, there were a few.

1015
00:49:07,500 --> 00:49:09,500
I will be fair.

1016
00:49:09,500 --> 00:49:14,500
I did like that.

1017
00:49:14,500 --> 00:49:18,500
No, I can't even find the things I liked.

1018
00:49:18,500 --> 00:49:21,500
I did like silence.

1019
00:49:21,500 --> 00:49:22,500
Okay.

1020
00:49:22,500 --> 00:49:24,500
He played checkers with his horse.

1021
00:49:24,500 --> 00:49:26,500
Oh, I forgot about that.

1022
00:49:26,500 --> 00:49:29,500
That was a great bit.

1023
00:49:29,500 --> 00:49:30,500
That was very cute.

1024
00:49:30,500 --> 00:49:31,500
That was great.

1025
00:49:31,500 --> 00:49:32,500
I did love that.

1026
00:49:32,500 --> 00:49:44,500
Um, I love how he was so angry at himself for like being able to see her through the tent when the flame and the candle was like lit because he could like see her shadow.

1027
00:49:44,500 --> 00:49:46,500
He was very ashamed.

1028
00:49:46,500 --> 00:49:47,500
It also very turned on.

1029
00:49:47,500 --> 00:49:52,500
I liked that he had only kissed one woman and had sex, I guess.

1030
00:49:52,500 --> 00:49:54,500
One woman, whatever.

1031
00:49:54,500 --> 00:49:56,500
Connachy McBride coated.

1032
00:49:56,500 --> 00:50:02,500
Um, the little girl kissing his wounds.

1033
00:50:02,500 --> 00:50:03,500
That was adorable.

1034
00:50:03,500 --> 00:50:04,500
That was adorable.

1035
00:50:04,500 --> 00:50:05,500
Yes.

1036
00:50:05,500 --> 00:50:06,500
Oh, you're right.

1037
00:50:06,500 --> 00:50:13,500
She single handedly one, one, um, that scene.

1038
00:50:13,500 --> 00:50:14,500
That was very cute.

1039
00:50:14,500 --> 00:50:15,500
I know.

1040
00:50:15,500 --> 00:50:17,500
She shaved him, not the little girl.

1041
00:50:17,500 --> 00:50:18,500
No.

1042
00:50:18,500 --> 00:50:21,500
Um, the heroine shaved the hero.

1043
00:50:21,500 --> 00:50:22,500
I did love that.

1044
00:50:22,500 --> 00:50:24,500
That was good for me.

1045
00:50:24,500 --> 00:50:32,500
So see, there were there were things that were like building to like my heart, like opening up and like spilling out onto my seat.

1046
00:50:32,500 --> 00:50:33,500
Wow.

1047
00:50:33,500 --> 00:50:35,500
That was an interesting metaphor.

1048
00:50:35,500 --> 00:50:36,500
Thank you.

1049
00:50:36,500 --> 00:50:38,500
Um, I'm a pinata.

1050
00:50:38,500 --> 00:50:42,500
Whack me with a stick and I'll give you something interesting.

1051
00:50:42,500 --> 00:50:49,500
Um, well, that's that's a.

1052
00:50:49,500 --> 00:50:54,500
Getting kinkier than I anticipated in this.

1053
00:50:54,500 --> 00:50:56,500
Uh, oh yeah.

1054
00:50:56,500 --> 00:51:05,500
Um, Houston did not tell, um, whatever her name is who I don't even know what this woman's name is.

1055
00:51:05,500 --> 00:51:07,500
Do you know Amelia?

1056
00:51:07,500 --> 00:51:08,500
Amelia.

1057
00:51:08,500 --> 00:51:09,500
Yes, you do know.

1058
00:51:09,500 --> 00:51:10,500
She does know listeners.

1059
00:51:10,500 --> 00:51:13,500
Um, Houston.

1060
00:51:13,500 --> 00:51:17,500
You didn't hear the exchange.

1061
00:51:17,500 --> 00:51:21,500
Houston did not tell her to purchase clothes.

1062
00:51:21,500 --> 00:51:23,500
That was all talus.

1063
00:51:23,500 --> 00:51:25,500
No other way around.

1064
00:51:25,500 --> 00:51:26,500
Oh, fuck.

1065
00:51:26,500 --> 00:51:31,500
Well, I even wrote it wrong in my notes and that was me just listening to this book.

1066
00:51:31,500 --> 00:51:35,500
So really am I to blame?

1067
00:51:35,500 --> 00:51:40,500
I had a one in three chance and I didn't get it.

1068
00:51:40,500 --> 00:51:53,500
But honestly, honestly, who would really remember?

1069
00:51:53,500 --> 00:52:01,500
I only remember Austin because he was so fucked over and fucked up and then fucked everything up himself.

1070
00:52:01,500 --> 00:52:04,500
Oh, wait.

1071
00:52:04,500 --> 00:52:05,500
No, I did write it right.

1072
00:52:05,500 --> 00:52:06,500
I'm just bad at reading.

1073
00:52:06,500 --> 00:52:09,500
Nice.

1074
00:52:09,500 --> 00:52:10,500
Yeah.

1075
00:52:10,500 --> 00:52:11,500
Cool.

1076
00:52:11,500 --> 00:52:21,500
It could be like sometimes it do be sometimes I'll read words and they are not the words that are actually on the page.

1077
00:52:21,500 --> 00:52:26,500
They are words that I made up and I'm like, oh, that changes the meaning of the sentence.

1078
00:52:26,500 --> 00:52:31,500
Now I did not clock it and I'll reread because I'm like, that was a really weird exchange.

1079
00:52:31,500 --> 00:52:33,500
And I'm like, oh, it was just me.

1080
00:52:33,500 --> 00:52:34,500
I'm really weird.

1081
00:52:34,500 --> 00:52:35,500
The book is normal.

1082
00:52:35,500 --> 00:52:44,500
See, I think I basically went through the things that I liked and then there's just all the hour and so that we didn't like.

1083
00:52:44,500 --> 00:52:45,500
I didn't like most of it.

1084
00:52:45,500 --> 00:52:46,500
Yeah.

1085
00:52:46,500 --> 00:52:47,500
Yeah.

1086
00:52:47,500 --> 00:52:50,500
The horse and the checkers was really.

1087
00:52:50,500 --> 00:52:56,500
Yeah, that was the main thing.

1088
00:52:56,500 --> 00:52:59,500
The horse playing checkers and the little girl kissing.

1089
00:52:59,500 --> 00:53:08,500
If that entire book could have just been that energy, you have a different story and also less Confederacy.

1090
00:53:08,500 --> 00:53:13,500
But alas, yeah, I would say like 100 percent less Confederacy.

1091
00:53:13,500 --> 00:53:14,500
I'd appreciate it.

1092
00:53:14,500 --> 00:53:15,500
I really would.

1093
00:53:15,500 --> 00:53:19,500
I should say 100 percent less pro Confederacy.

1094
00:53:19,500 --> 00:53:23,500
I wouldn't have minded the presence of it if they were anti.

1095
00:53:23,500 --> 00:53:24,500
Yeah.

1096
00:53:24,500 --> 00:53:27,500
Or we even could have just not addressed it.

1097
00:53:27,500 --> 00:53:35,500
Like we could have just like not said it post or like just not had it be so close to the Civil War.

1098
00:53:35,500 --> 00:53:40,500
Like, I just don't get like there could have been a different source of his trauma.

1099
00:53:40,500 --> 00:53:51,500
There's this like weird fascination whenever these things are written, because there are so many that you have to avoid and you have to like look to make sure that they they're not.

1100
00:53:51,500 --> 00:54:03,500
Well, I mean, I think is the old south is like the closest to this idea of like the Regency aristocratic classes that America has.

1101
00:54:03,500 --> 00:54:06,500
And so that's what their go to is that like.

1102
00:54:06,500 --> 00:54:12,500
But this isn't even that because we're not dealing with like Southern bells and that like stratified Southern society.

1103
00:54:12,500 --> 00:54:14,500
We're dealing with the frontier.

1104
00:54:14,500 --> 00:54:21,500
Unfortunately, deeply.

1105
00:54:21,500 --> 00:54:23,500
Just.

1106
00:54:23,500 --> 00:54:30,500
I mean, maybe the lesson all along is go watch Shrek instead.

1107
00:54:30,500 --> 00:54:35,500
I'm so serious.

1108
00:54:35,500 --> 00:54:40,500
There are there.

1109
00:54:40,500 --> 00:54:48,500
And honestly, then go watch Shrek, too, because that piano scene.

1110
00:54:48,500 --> 00:54:52,500
Is one of the greatest cinematic masterpieces.

1111
00:54:52,500 --> 00:54:53,500
It's true.

1112
00:54:53,500 --> 00:54:54,500
This day and age.

1113
00:54:54,500 --> 00:54:56,500
I cannot be said about this book.

1114
00:54:56,500 --> 00:55:01,500
Speaking of jokes that like were funny to me as a child, but are funnier now as an adult.

1115
00:55:01,500 --> 00:55:06,500
I quote the they don't even have dental all the time.

1116
00:55:06,500 --> 00:55:11,500
For some reason, that cracked me up as a kid, and I don't think I fully understood the joke.

1117
00:55:11,500 --> 00:55:17,500
I just thought it was like a funny exchange, but I've been quoting it for years and no one else in my family thinks it's like that funny of a bit.

1118
00:55:17,500 --> 00:55:20,500
But I think it's hysterical.

1119
00:55:20,500 --> 00:55:24,500
They don't even have dental.

1120
00:55:24,500 --> 00:55:29,500
We're from the Union.

1121
00:55:29,500 --> 00:55:30,500
They don't even have dental.

1122
00:55:30,500 --> 00:55:39,500
My favorite really obscure thing that no one else finds funny is that I'm a huge fan of the movie All the President's Men.

1123
00:55:39,500 --> 00:55:44,500
And I read also that book by Woodward and Bernstein.

1124
00:55:44,500 --> 00:55:56,500
But in the movie, there's a scene where one of the like the fall guys says something about like his wife and his kid and his dog and his cat.

1125
00:55:56,500 --> 00:56:01,500
Like I got a wife and a kid and a dog and a cat. Like that's why I can't like take down Nixon.

1126
00:56:01,500 --> 00:56:07,500
And I say it all the time. Like Hannah, go get the laundry. I have a wife and a kid and a dog and a cat.

1127
00:56:07,500 --> 00:56:11,500
Like I can't go get the laundry. I've got a wife and a kid and a dog and a cat.

1128
00:56:11,500 --> 00:56:13,500
I can't.

1129
00:56:13,500 --> 00:56:15,500
I'm a dog and a cat.

1130
00:56:15,500 --> 00:56:17,500
Like I can't do it.

1131
00:56:17,500 --> 00:56:19,500
And it stuck with me.

1132
00:56:19,500 --> 00:56:24,500
And then we watched it recently. My mom was like, that's where I'm like, yeah, that's where that's from.

1133
00:56:24,500 --> 00:56:26,500
I don't have a wife and a kid and a dog and a cat.

1134
00:56:26,500 --> 00:56:28,500
I have the dream.

1135
00:56:28,500 --> 00:56:32,500
They're like, oh, OK.

1136
00:56:32,500 --> 00:56:37,500
So that's my that's my dental.

1137
00:56:37,500 --> 00:56:40,500
God, those movies are just so amazing.

1138
00:56:40,500 --> 00:56:42,500
They're so clever. They're so smart.

1139
00:56:42,500 --> 00:56:46,500
And I will die on that hill.

1140
00:56:46,500 --> 00:56:49,500
Well, I really will.

1141
00:56:49,500 --> 00:56:52,500
That's it. That's how we're rounding it out, guys.

1142
00:56:52,500 --> 00:56:56,500
Yeah, that really is Shrek Shrek.

1143
00:56:56,500 --> 00:56:58,500
Mm hmm.

1144
00:56:58,500 --> 00:57:00,500
The episode was about Shrek all along, guys.

1145
00:57:00,500 --> 00:57:02,500
You didn't know.

1146
00:57:02,500 --> 00:57:06,500
As with every episode, we don't do it.

1147
00:57:06,500 --> 00:57:10,500
But I bet we could make a Shrek like analogy or something.

1148
00:57:10,500 --> 00:57:16,500
And everyone, we we we spare you Shrek.

1149
00:57:16,500 --> 00:57:18,500
Exactly.

1150
00:57:18,500 --> 00:57:20,500
OK.

1151
00:57:20,500 --> 00:57:24,500
Well, season one was six degrees from Nicholas Cage.

1152
00:57:24,500 --> 00:57:27,500
And now it's six degrees from Shrek.

1153
00:57:27,500 --> 00:57:30,500
We're bringing you the hot takes, guys.

1154
00:57:30,500 --> 00:57:34,500
You're always going to be six degrees from either Taylor Swift or Shrek.

1155
00:57:34,500 --> 00:57:37,500
Oh, you're going to be about one degree from Taylor Swift.

1156
00:57:37,500 --> 00:57:39,500
Let's be honest.

1157
00:57:39,500 --> 00:57:40,500
Zero degrees.

1158
00:57:40,500 --> 00:57:42,500
They don't even have dental.

1159
00:57:42,500 --> 00:57:46,500
Like, well, wow.

1160
00:57:46,500 --> 00:57:48,500
That's it. That's all I got.

1161
00:57:48,500 --> 00:57:55,500
Yeah, I just wish that we would have not had to read that book.

1162
00:57:55,500 --> 00:57:58,500
But alas, we did.

1163
00:57:58,500 --> 00:58:04,500
So hopefully, maybe you didn't read along with us and you were like, I'm just going to wait.

1164
00:58:04,500 --> 00:58:08,500
And then you listen to this, you're like, I'm just going to never.

1165
00:58:08,500 --> 00:58:10,500
And I support you.

1166
00:58:10,500 --> 00:58:13,500
And if you're like, wow, I think I'm still going to read it.

1167
00:58:13,500 --> 00:58:15,500
And then you read it and you hate it.

1168
00:58:15,500 --> 00:58:19,500
Well, told you so.

1169
00:58:19,500 --> 00:58:21,500
Booyah.

1170
00:58:21,500 --> 00:58:27,500
Or if you read book one, you're like, well, what if I also read books two and book three just to finish up a series?

1171
00:58:27,500 --> 00:58:29,500
And then you also hate it.

1172
00:58:29,500 --> 00:58:33,500
Also told you because like same.

1173
00:58:33,500 --> 00:58:34,500
But not great.

1174
00:58:34,500 --> 00:58:37,500
Worse, actually, just progressively worse.

1175
00:58:37,500 --> 00:58:39,500
Just bad all around.

1176
00:58:39,500 --> 00:58:45,500
So what a great note to leave you on.

1177
00:58:45,500 --> 00:58:47,500
It's not one of Caroline's actual musical notes.

1178
00:58:47,500 --> 00:58:49,500
It's just it doesn't deserve it.

1179
00:58:49,500 --> 00:58:51,500
No, it's just a don't read this book note.

1180
00:58:51,500 --> 00:58:58,500
And if you did read it, go watch Shrek instead to like cleanse your soul.

1181
00:58:58,500 --> 00:59:02,500
And with that, I don't think we have any announcements.

1182
00:59:02,500 --> 00:59:12,500
Next check our most recent newsletter for queer historical romance novella recommendations and a giveaway.

1183
00:59:12,500 --> 00:59:15,500
Did you say when that's ending in the newsletter?

1184
00:59:15,500 --> 00:59:16,500
I have no clue.

1185
00:59:16,500 --> 00:59:17,500
I believe I did.

1186
00:59:17,500 --> 00:59:19,500
It ends June 20th, a week.

1187
00:59:19,500 --> 00:59:25,500
I think I said in the newsletter, I definitely trust you.

1188
00:59:25,500 --> 00:59:28,500
So this episode that we're recording goes live on the 16th.

1189
00:59:28,500 --> 00:59:31,500
So you've got a few days to enter.

1190
00:59:31,500 --> 00:59:38,500
And stay tuned for more queer historical romance.

1191
00:59:38,500 --> 00:59:42,500
The secret lives of country gentlemen.

1192
00:59:42,500 --> 00:59:43,500
Yes.

1193
00:59:43,500 --> 00:59:44,500
And our TBR Tuesday.

1194
00:59:44,500 --> 00:59:46,500
Yes, that's going to be unhinged.

1195
00:59:46,500 --> 00:59:49,500
We're going to do our best, but it's going to be long.

1196
00:59:49,500 --> 00:59:54,500
So stay tuned for more queer recommendations.

1197
00:59:54,500 --> 01:00:04,500
And I think the next one of this old school school is dreaming of you by Lisa Clayton.

1198
01:00:04,500 --> 01:00:05,500
Oh, hell yeah.

1199
01:00:05,500 --> 01:00:06,500
I haven't read it.

1200
01:00:06,500 --> 01:00:09,500
Lisa, Lisa, don't let us down.

1201
01:00:09,500 --> 01:00:12,500
Lorraine, let us down.

1202
01:00:12,500 --> 01:00:14,500
Lisa, please don't.

1203
01:00:14,500 --> 01:00:15,500
No, no, no.

1204
01:00:15,500 --> 01:00:17,500
The next one is the proposition by Judith.

1205
01:00:17,500 --> 01:00:18,500
I'm Jesus.

1206
01:00:18,500 --> 01:00:19,500
Then dreaming of you.

1207
01:00:19,500 --> 01:00:22,500
Oh, what do you mean?

1208
01:00:22,500 --> 01:00:24,500
Oh, I've heard good things about Judith.

1209
01:00:24,500 --> 01:00:27,500
I know, but I just want to lose a claim.

1210
01:00:27,500 --> 01:00:28,500
That's not until mid July.

1211
01:00:28,500 --> 01:00:31,500
Why did I get that in my head?

1212
01:00:31,500 --> 01:00:33,500
Well, it is the next one.

1213
01:00:33,500 --> 01:00:34,500
But we still have the proposition.

1214
01:00:34,500 --> 01:00:38,500
I am so confused, which is nothing new.

1215
01:00:38,500 --> 01:00:40,500
But wow.

1216
01:00:40,500 --> 01:00:41,500
Okay.

1217
01:00:41,500 --> 01:00:42,500
Yeah, I'm wrong.

1218
01:00:42,500 --> 01:00:43,500
I know.

1219
01:00:43,500 --> 01:00:44,500
It's okay.

1220
01:00:44,500 --> 01:00:46,500
Dreaming of you is the proposition.

1221
01:00:46,500 --> 01:00:47,500
Okay.

1222
01:00:47,500 --> 01:00:48,500
Yeah.

1223
01:00:48,500 --> 01:00:49,500
Wow.

1224
01:00:49,500 --> 01:00:50,500
Okay.

1225
01:00:50,500 --> 01:00:54,500
Well, wild times are afoot.

1226
01:00:54,500 --> 01:00:57,500
Wild times have been afoot.

1227
01:00:57,500 --> 01:01:00,500
Trek has two feet.

1228
01:01:00,500 --> 01:01:02,500
This book has zero legs to stand on.

1229
01:01:02,500 --> 01:01:05,500
What kind of weird ass poem?

1230
01:01:05,500 --> 01:01:10,500
Spoken word bullshit.

1231
01:01:10,500 --> 01:01:12,500
I don't know.

1232
01:01:12,500 --> 01:01:17,500
Artists can't recreate their art, so I can't.

1233
01:01:17,500 --> 01:01:19,500
I'm so sorry for that.

1234
01:01:19,500 --> 01:01:20,500
Thank you.

1235
01:01:20,500 --> 01:01:24,500
I appreciate your condolences.

1236
01:01:24,500 --> 01:01:28,500
I have nothing else.

1237
01:01:28,500 --> 01:01:30,500
Enter your speak now era.

1238
01:01:30,500 --> 01:01:32,500
Go watch Trek.

1239
01:01:32,500 --> 01:01:36,500
Two main things to come away from this episode.

1240
01:01:36,500 --> 01:01:41,500
Come away with from this episode.

1241
01:01:41,500 --> 01:01:44,500
Okay.

1242
01:01:44,500 --> 01:01:46,500
Ciao, Bella.

1243
01:01:46,500 --> 01:01:48,500
Where the hell you been, Loka?

1244
01:01:48,500 --> 01:01:50,500
Twilight jar.

1245
01:01:50,500 --> 01:01:53,500
Give me the Twilight tax.

1246
01:01:53,500 --> 01:01:54,500
Twilight tax.

1247
01:01:54,500 --> 01:01:55,500
I will.

1248
01:01:55,500 --> 01:01:59,500
There's also been many Shrek taxes.

1249
01:01:59,500 --> 01:02:02,500
At this point, we are in Shrek debt.

1250
01:02:02,500 --> 01:02:04,500
We are in Shrek debt.

1251
01:02:04,500 --> 01:02:05,500
Shrek jail.

1252
01:02:05,500 --> 01:02:08,500
I'm not wearing ladies underwear.

1253
01:02:08,500 --> 01:02:18,500
It's a thong.