(Auto-generated)Welcome back, welcome back.
I'm WS Walker and this is the Laughing Matters Podcast.
And oh boy, do I have a fun one for you guys today.
This one's fresh off the presses, just thought of it the other day.
Totally new realization.
It was something I've known for a while to an extent, but like all the best stuff.
You kinda know it because it's true, but you never really examine it.
This is one of those cases.
Do you remember that scene in American Beauty?
I quote it all the time.
Lester Burnham gets on us to go to his boss's office and says, hey Lester, got a minute?
And he turns around and he goes, for you, Craig?
I've got five.
And it's just the snarkiest response.
But I offhandedly threw this line out to my best friend Martin, and we're watching something
together.
I had to pause, man, because I had this following thought run a whirlwind through
my head very shortly after saying it.
And luckily Martin was kind enough to wait while I jotted it down.
So we've kinda talked about a little bit of it before.
What are those three super important things that we give out to people?
Time, attention, and effort.
And you're typically giving them all three when you give them money that you work for.
And just like with money, we have this tendency to kind of budget it out, you know, even when
it comes to our time, our effort, and our attention.
So yes, we hand out time to people, but before we do, we make decisions on time budget per
person.
You know, there's a whole meeting that happens internally that goes, oh, okay, two and a
half minutes max, you know, and you've got the other board members.
We have those meetings, and then if that person goes over budget, then often there's a fierce
renegotiation that takes place.
I know you've had those.
I've had them in those moments where somebody is just, man, it's time for me to go.
And it occurred to me that a lot of people stick way too close to their initial budget
decisions.
And that way of living, of course, is in an opposite direction of real happiness.
Nobody gets to happiness alone.
And it's that connection that makes the happiness worthwhile.
And without that time, without that effort, without that attention, that connection withers.
And you don't think of them as much.
And I was sitting there explaining all of this out to Martin as I'm having this thought
process because I'm jotting it down and I'm explaining it to him so I know how to explain
it on the page.
Because for me, it's a very fluid understanding.
It takes some effort to make it understandable to everybody else who doesn't have access
to my entire file cabinet that I have.
You know, that everybody's got their own file cabinet.
You guys don't know where I've filed stuff or what stuff I've filed.
Anyways, it was while I was explaining all this to him, we actually, I think I stumbled
on it, but we had a good talk about how this is why we start with the smallest possible
increment.
Hey, you got a second?
And we're so cautious to move up the scale.
It takes so much more to move up to a minute.
People assume something just got way more serious and is going to require a budget meeting
when we move up to a minute.
But yeah, I just wanted to record an episode and say that I propose this to you, dear listener.
Be more present at the budget meetings.
Don't just yeah, yeah, yeah, sign the paper onto the next order of business.
I mean the you really want to better your company kind of there at the budget meetings.
And be more kind and be more generous than you've justified.
But deliberately try to help one person at a time when someone is in front of you.
Give them more time than you would normally give them.
Be generous because you have no idea how much more they show off of themselves when they
see that you are willing to believe in their company's product.
And remember when I said there were three main things that we give out?
Well, there's one I left out and that's love.
Because obviously give more of it than you've justified in the budget.
It's the only sane way to live out there.
If you actually want happiness, if you actually want the world to be better.
You know you can't see the outcome.
You know you don't get to be here for that.
We are all planting seeds in a garden that for the most part we do not get to see grow.
And the only sane way to live is to try to put the best you can out there for the rest
of them.
Because if you're doing for yourself at the end of this, guess who got all the benefits
of you?
Who did?
Oh, that guy went in the ground.
And chances are you're going to leave behind a wake of razor blades and land mines.
But if you helped people, if you gave them time, if you gave them confidence by spending
your effort and your attention on them, well then you leave behind a lot more that kept
going and kept going outward.
That doesn't always beget good, but man it is way more attractive to good than anything
else.
And that is it for today's episode.
I do want to take a second to say good grief guys.
Reach out to me.
It's willhelpmail at gmail.com.
Help me out here guys.
I would love to answer some questions.
I would love to get any kind of topic in here.
Because one of the best parts of this whole series of concepts that I put out in the book
is just the tendrils that it sent out into everything else.
It gave a new perspective on almost everything in my life.
And by way of that, it probably gave me a different perspective than you would get on
whatever you send me.
So please reach out to me.
Try me out.
Chances are it will go on the show.
Oh and yeah, I was going to propose a challenge a little bit later, but let's do it now.
Hey!
Send in a recording of yourself.
Asking a question.
It will go on the air.
I don't care what the question is.
I'm going to bleep you if you start cussing, but otherwise it's going out.
Do you have an opposing viewpoint?
Okay, awesome!
Oh my god, yes!
Please!
Because that means I haven't explained myself properly.
Or it means you've thought of something that I haven't.
Oh my goodness.
That's...
Either which way, I would love to talk about that.
Can you imagine how much fun that is for me to realize I'm wrong about something on the
air?
That would be amazing!
A little depressing on my end, but probably entertaining for you guys.
It's very rare that anybody debates these topics with me.
Usually the argument is born out of some kind of misunderstanding over what I said.
But if you do...
If you do have a...
Like a not...
Oh my god, if you read Herring through that...
One of my biggest pet peeves.
I want to say a debate, a conversation about it.
Because when you open yourself up to changing your mind about something, about taking something
in for what it is, emptying your cup, and then seeing if it's true or not...
That's a conversation to me.
We may have conflicting ideas, but I'm looking for where they meet first.
And then I'm looking to figure out why they conflict.
So hit me up, GoodHelpMail at gmail.com.
You can Facebook me.
That's facebook.com slash I could help.
And of course, as always, you can check out the Could Help show, amongst other things
that are now up there, related to the Laughing Matters Podcast at youtube.com slash could
help.
And as always, TheLaughingMatters.com, which has a new website coming.
Yay!
I designed it.
I'm excited.
I like it so far.
It's been interesting using a digital tablet for the first time.
I've always been a pen and paper kind of...
Yay!
So yeah, that's gonna be...
For a minute, that's gonna be my last plea for you guys to reach out.
Pretty pretty.
Oh so pretty.
I feel pretty and witty and please, reach out.
Alright.
So, to sum up, be good to them.
Be good for them.
And you're gonna do great.
I'm W.S.
Walker.
You're the fantastic you.
Be sweet.