Hey y'all, welcome back to the Thicc AF Podcast.
It's a new week.
This is Sarah.
I'm here with Emily.
Hey, hey, hey.
I did well.
I called you by your first name, not your last name.
Well, thank God.
About time.
So we are recording a little bit of an intro for an episode previously recorded.
It is a part two to our lovely guest, my man Brandon.
And so we're going to chat about a few things.
Getting prepped for the holidays.
Not really getting prepped.
We just want to talk about Fuck, Marry, Kill.
Wait, what?
What are we getting prepped for the holidays for?
It's almost the holidays.
It's almost my birthday.
And we're really just getting, we're not even getting prepped.
We're just like, I'm not prepped for anything.
Oh, I am.
I'm all done shopping.
You shopped for everyone?
Everybody.
Did you do it all online?
Yes.
So I have a problem because I have no idea what to get you for your birthday or for Christmas.
And you're like, oh my God, I'm so excited about.
And I'm like.
I tried to give her her present on Sunday.
No, no, that is not cool.
You can't give Christmas presents like two weeks in advance if you like know the person.
Like I mean, like we're going to see each other.
I know.
I just get excited.
She was being lazy.
Well, no, she was said, I don't want to move it to my new apartment, which is literally
in the same apartment complex.
It is, but it's still a box full of presents that I have to carry up there.
But mine is one present, not a box full.
I gave Melanie hers this weekend already.
And she opened it.
Yeah.
What if you gave it to me?
Is it wrapped?
In a bag because I don't know how to wrap.
Are you serious?
Swear to God, Brandon wrapped my dad's present yesterday.
Who raised you?
Sorry, Chuck and Connie and whoever else.
Donnie and Mitch.
But like my mom, my mom will not allow me to bring gift bags to her house.
Of course, Karen Johnson.
Her Christmas tree has a brand and it is, listen, it has color schemes and she doesn't
want it.
Also her dining room table for like Christmas and for Thanksgiving or anytime we're on the
dining room table, she doesn't want people bringing their like plastic or like aluminum
foil tins that they get, they're reusable tins from, you know, you get from Publix or
whatever.
Yeah.
And she's got it in dishes.
So her table is beautiful with her like crystal candle light.
No, my mom wraps presents.
And I mean, obviously I've been living down here back down here since 2008 and she usually
sends a box of stuff and she pre wraps it and packs the box and everything.
My sister learned how to wrap because she worked for like a retail store that was local
to where we grew up in high school.
And so she learned how to wrap and she's a beautiful rapper.
And we got my dad and Connie a shared gift this year.
I can't say what it is because maybe they'll listen to this before Christmas, who knows,
but there's a photo of it on the box.
And so last night when I was like packing some things, I was like, Brandon SOS, do you
know how to wrap?
And he was like, yeah, I know how to wrap.
And I was like, God, listen, I've been rapping since I was little and my brothers are always
like they'll bring their pile of gifts over to my parents' house.
They don't even live there anymore.
They've been doing this since I was probably two years old because my mom taught me how
to do it.
She was like, when I have children, they're my slaves.
They're not.
So she taught me how to rap when I was two.
But she but they will bring them over and they'll be like, Emily, wrap all these presents.
I have wrapped my own presents.
I'm not kidding.
Like when I was younger, so even now still my mom does numbers.
She doesn't put gift tags with names on them because when she was younger, you want to
know what she did, she took her presents, she would wrap her presents and she would
open them up and then rewrap them back.
Me and Jerry did that once.
It ruined Christmas.
We were so disappointed that Christmas because there's no secret anymore.
Exactly.
That's so sad.
I can't believe y'all did that.
That's hilarious.
I've never done that before.
But like my mom said she used to do that.
So she knows the trick.
So she puts numbers and it'll be like one she for and she'll get drunk when she does
the numbers and she'll do the numbers on different days or she used to.
She doesn't really get drunk anymore.
She like drinks like one drink and it'll be like after she does everything and she'll
be like, I had two sips and now like I'm going to bed by, but she's like, she'll forget the
numbers and she'll be like, oh God, oh God, I forgot who's number three.
And now she has like seven numbers.
She needs to just do it by children.
So Eric is number one, you're number two and Daniel's number three.
She can't do that because then we would know who we are.
She's doing numbers because she doesn't want us to know whose gift is what.
So we can't open them.
We can't just pick them out and be like, oh, this is for me.
We'd have to go through all of them and figure out who, which are number, which one is our
number.
Well, even better than that growing up really, I guess throughout the Christmases after
my parents got divorced and we came back down here for Christmas, we call my grandmother's
house the farm and we would go out to the farm and it was this old farmhouse that had
like one bedroom, a bathroom, and then a loft upstairs that had bunks built into the wall.
Now they've added onto it and all that jazz.
But when we were younger, my grandmother used to buy even just the Ziploc bags for like
your sandwiches and stuff.
And she would buy the ones that have like the, you know, photos, if you will, on the
outside, put a little bit of tissue paper around a present, put it in a Ziploc and throw
it over the balcony.
Wait, hold on, hold on.
The balcony?
Yeah.
Like with the loft where the bunks were, she would go upstairs, bring the presents up there.
She threw it a-
Yeah.
She would be like bombs away and like drop a bag.
Is this, what do you call her?
Grana?
Grana.
Yeah.
I love Grana.
I've never met Grana, but she sounds freaking cool.
Yeah.
It was like the most-
Bombs away.
Yeah.
I mean, she would just be like, all right, next one's coming.
And you know, right, like you would like ham and cheese on the front of the bag or whatever.
Sarah, Jerry, Amanda.
Oh, she put them in Ziploc bags?
Yes.
That's what I'm saying.
The ones that have like the paintings on the outside or whatever you will, like not just
the regular sandwich bags, but the Christmas themed ones.
Oh yeah.
I've never seen those.
Well, I mean, I don't know if they make them anymore.
Those are fancy AF.
She probably spent a lot of money on those back in the day.
I mean, they were damn Ziploc bags.
My mom won't even buy Ziploc bags.
She wants me to reuse my Ziploc bags because she said she's been green before green was
cool.
Okay, Karen.
I know.
That's what I said.
Her name is Karen.
I do have reusable Ziplocs, but I don't use them for everything.
Like I have the disposable ones too.
And anybody, y'all can come from me.
She gets mad at me because I'll be like throwing away a Ziploc bag.
She's like, you could use that for something else.
My mom will wash them out.
Oh my God.
That's freaking gross.
My mom will wash them out and hang them over the sink candle to dry out and reuse them.
Do you know how much it costs for one of those?
I mean, I get it.
Like it's helping the environment.
That's nice.
But like my mom's, I feel like my mom is more worried about like spending more money on
buying another one or something and not necessarily the environment maybe.
And it's like, okay, that costs like two cents.
Yeah, just two cents for that.
And maybe you should just like, the time it takes for me to like rinse this out cost me
$30 like my time.
Oh my gosh.
You know, so.
Whatever.
Well anyways, Brandon is a champ and he wrapped my dad and Connie's present for me.
Did he teach you while he... Hey, I need you to send me a picture of what it looks like
because I want to know if it's good wrapping.
It actually, he got nervous at one point.
I was like, you're right there.
He's like, I don't know.
I'm getting kind of nervous.
But no, it looks good.
It really does.
So we're going to have to look.
I think that this weekend we're going to have a gift wrapping teaching contest because if
you don't know how to wrap a present, I've been, my mom tells me that if I put something
in a bag... Emily, I do not care.
I don't want to learn.
For this weekend for Dirty Santa, I was like, am I going to put this in this box or should
I throw this box away and put it in a bag?
I was like, I should put it in a bag because it's easier for Dirty Santa because people
can just pull it out.
But I'm like, in my head I have this thing that is deeply ingrained in me of like, you're
tacky.
Also, there was a TV show.
This is Us, I think, where... Do you remember this episode?
I know you watched This is Us where the girl, the lady, they were like, oh, she's a single
mom and she came and she wrapped her present in newspaper.
Don't spoil it.
I haven't seen it.
This is an old episode.
I've only seen season one.
It's in season one.
It was a very long time ago.
It was a very long time ago for me too.
I haven't seen all of them either, but I'm not spoiling anything.
That's not a spoiler.
It's just some lady that comes over.
I think it's This is Us.
It might be a different show.
Somebody can tell me.
But all the ladies are like, oh, poor girl.
She got divorced and it was back in the day when you couldn't get divorced.
Thank God for divorce.
I feel so bad for that lady, but I also am like, thank God for you because you paved
the way for the rest of us, number one.
Number two-
On TV she did?
Not on TV, but that was model.
There were people that were like that and that's why they did this.
It's not fiction because it's fake science fiction.
It's regular fiction.
Anyway.
Where was I?
I was just talking about wrapping Charles' present.
I'm just baffled that you cannot wrap a present because I feel like-
I mean, I could if I had to, but it's not going to look great and I don't care.
That's wild to me.
I will go to the dollar store and I will buy 57 bags before I will sit there and try to
wrap a present.
That's so lazy.
I don't like wrapping.
I'm not good at it.
I don't like to do shit I'm not good at.
But listen, you could be good at it because you're good at everything that you try and
you know it.
Yeah.
You do.
You're good at everything.
You're just like me.
That is a compliment for you not for me.
No, I'm telling you are good at everything.
That's why I'm baffled that you don't know how to wrap a present.
Okay.
Can we drop it?
No.
I really want you to learn.
Okay.
But anyways, we will move on to the FMK and we'll continue this conversation later, but
I think that I might bring wrapping paper and do a birthday party slash dirty Santa
thing this weekend.
I think that I'm going to bring wrapping paper and see if we can have a Christmas present
wrapping contest.
No.
So, okay.
So do your FMK.
Okay.
Also known as?
Fuck, Mary Kill.
My first one, I'm taking it back to the jam bands because Kramp C, Emily hurt my feelings.
Oh, Lord.
So here we go.
Almond Brothers, widespread panic and government mule.
Mary Almond Brothers, fuck government mule and kill widespread panic.
I can't tell if you're doing that just to irritate me or if that is genuine.
I've never really gotten into the widespread panic thing.
Maybe I need to do that.
I'm going to do it for you.
I promise.
I'm going to start listening.
I'm going to learn how to wrap a present if you learn about widespread panic.
I will do that.
Okay.
All right.
Deal.
We got to fist bump that.
Make it explode.
Okay.
Oh my God.
What about you?
What is yours?
We know what yours is, but we don't know who your second tune.
We know your top.
I am marrying widespread panic.
I'm fucking Almond Brothers and I'm killing government mule.
I really do like government mule, but still that's my choice.
Okay.
You want me to go?
Yeah.
Absolutely.
Go ahead.
All right.
So my first one is we're going to do the 90s female country singers.
I was a little torn about who to put in this, but we're going to say Shania Twain, I don't
know, Faith Hill and the Dixie Chicks.
Oh God.
I was going to do like, so the Dixie Chicks is a group.
I was going to do like a single, but then I feel like Dixie Chicks is better than her.
I don't know if I would know them by name if you did a single.
So no, no, no, not them single, but I meant like a somebody.
I was going to do Leanne Rimes.
It will kill her.
Really?
I love Leanne Rimes.
Oh my God.
I love her.
Nope.
She's a home wrecker.
Is she?
Yeah.
Do you know?
You don't watch the housewives.
That's why you don't know this.
She is a home wrecker.
Is she a housewife?
No.
I mean, she wrecked the marriage of Brandi Glanville, who is a very, very, very hot mess
and sort of controversial human.
Do we know all of the story?
Or is it just hers and she's a hot mess?
No.
I mean, it is a whole many seasons storyline.
I didn't know this.
On Real Housewives of Beverly Hills.
Yes.
Wow.
But yeah, she's a home wrecker.
So kill her.
All right.
Home wrecker.
Bye.
Okay.
But we're doing Shania Twain, Faith Hill and Dixie Chicks.
Okay.
I'm going to marry Faith Hill because I think that she would just be like a faithful angel
of a spouse to have.
I'm fucking Shania Twain because she knows how to have fun.
And she's also an angel.
Absolutely.
And she's Canadian.
They're very nice.
I can't believe you're going to kill Dixie Chicks.
I am.
I don't really like them.
I never really liked them that much.
I mean.
I love them.
Kind of, but like I never get into that.
Excuse me.
I'm sorry.
They're not Dixie Chicks anymore.
They're not allowed to be.
Oh yeah.
They're the chicks.
Okay.
They're the chicks.
I'm sorry.
But why did the Dixie Chicks have to change their name, but Winn Dixie, the grocery store,
is still Winn Dixie?
Oh gosh.
I hate Winn Dixie anyway.
So it doesn't matter to me.
Like.
Okay.
Good.
I mean, I'm on the same page with you.
Why don't they have to change it?
I hate them.
Why did some people have to change their names?
You know what?
Grocery stores.
Publix, Winn Dixie and the Piggly Wiggly.
Oh, Piggly Wiggly.
Wait, hold on.
Depends on which Piggly Wiggly.
No, just pick.
Depends on which.
So if it's like the Piggly Wiggly and like Crestline.
Just pick your favorite Piggly Wiggly then and that's what you go off of.
Okay.
I like Piggly Wiggly and then I like, but I don't have one close to me.
You're fuck, marry and kill, ding dong.
I know.
I'm, oh, well I'm going to marry Publix because they are tried and true and they have a pharmacy
and that's where I go.
And if you go to their pharmacy, you can go to their pharmacy anywhere and they can transfer
and stuff like that.
Piggly Wiggly, I don't know if they can do that.
I don't even know if they have a pharmacy.
They probably do.
And I really like Piggly Wiggly, but so I'm going to say I'm going to, what was the other
one?
Winn Dixie.
Okay.
So I don't ever go to Winn Dixie.
So there's kill them and then I'm going to fuck Piggly Wiggly.
See I think I'm going to marry the Piggly Wiggly.
I'm going to fuck Publix and I'm going to kill Winn Dixie.
See I would have done that too, but like.
It was interchangeable.
I feel like because I use Publix a lot because it's close to me.
Yeah.
And, but you have a Publix close to you.
Where's a pig close to you?
Not by my parents' house.
Oh, but that's way far.
Not really.
It's by Lisa's.
Yeah.
That's far though.
Not for me.
Way further than the Publix.
That's literally you could walk to.
So.
I could walk, but I don't.
All right.
So did I do my Shania?
Did I say who I was going to?
No, you did not.
Okay.
So I am going to, you know what?
I might do the same as you, but I kind of like, this is a hard one.
I thought I was going to do.
I think I might marry Shania Twain because I feel like she is like sweet and sexy.
Yeah.
So was Faith Hill, but she's kind of like gone forever.
She's gone forever.
I haven't seen her in a long time.
She's like real like regimented.
I don't think she drinks alcohol.
So like you may want to kill her or fuck her and then be done because.
Yeah.
I think I might kill her.
Dixie chicks.
They're like pretty straight laced.
I'd fuck the Dixie chicks because that's three in one.
That's a foursome.
That would be weird though.
Is it, are any of them a lesbian?
Honestly, I do not know.
I don't either.
I think they were all married at one point.
I'm not sure.
But anyways, I like Dixie chicks.
I think they're cool.
I like their new album or I'm sorry, excuse me, the chicks, but everybody calls them the
Dixie chicks from back in the day.
So, and I honestly don't understand the reason for the name change, but.
Well.
I get it.
But I don't, it doesn't make sense.
I don't know.
I don't know the reason for the name change, but I get it.
I get it.
But I don't, to me, Dixie, that name, it's like, it's not a thing.
Anyways.
Okay.
I probably should cut that out.
Okay.
So do you have another one?
I know you did grocery stores, but don't you have one more?
Yeah, I do.
Okay.
We're going to go back to the men's on this one.
The men's?
Yeah.
Actors.
Okay.
Charlie Hunnam.
I have no idea who that is.
While you say the others, I'll look him up.
Okay.
Channing Tatum and Bradley Cooper.
Oh.
Oh, Charlie Hunnam.
He was in Sons of Anarchy, which is one of my all time favorite shows.
Okay.
So I never really got into that.
You need to watch it.
You'll thank yourself.
He's hot.
So.
He's delicious.
But who was, it was Bradley Cooper.
Channing Tatum.
He's an Alabamian.
I would probably fuck Bradley Cooper.
Marry Channing Tatum and kill Charlie Hunnam.
That's hateful.
I know, but like you picked three really good ones.
Yeah, I know.
And I know Bradley Cooper and Channing Tatum better than I do the others.
And I feel like Channing Tatum, he and his, I don't know if they're still together, but
I'm so old school with all my knowledge.
They have been divorced for years.
Listen, this is how bad I am about anything.
He has a new girlfriend and I think she's like remarried or something.
I'm the culture, I'm the worst.
Just blame it on the alcohol.
I don't know.
Not really.
It's just because I'm so busy and like honestly.
A glass of water.
You still aren't going to be able to know that.
I don't, these people that know so much about like celebrities, I'm like, do you not have
anything else better to do with your time?
Thank you.
How rude.
Well, it's not, but honestly I'm jealous of those people because I'm like, why am I working
until seven o'clock at night?
I know a lot of it.
When other people on their damn Facebooks or Instagram and Googling, I don't know.
How do you find out?
Are you watching like, oh, I had a roommate in college.
Her name was Kayla.
Hey Kayla, what's up?
She used to tell me, I'd be like, what are you doing?
She's like watching the news and it would be E news.
It was great.
She was so funny.
She was like, I'm just watching the news.
I do get E news notifications on my phone, but a lot of it comes from like obviously
Bravo and watching Real Housewives.
That's where that knowledge came from.
My mom and my sister and I will text if we see something come up or what, just send to
my sister and I more so on Instagram, just sharing stuff or whatever.
But I don't know, I like pop culture.
I'd be lying if I said I didn't.
I love it.
I think it's great, but the only time I hear of anything is when I listen.
Well it's every Monday through Wednesday now.
I listen to Howard Stern when I wake up in the morning.
And what time does that go off?
I mean my alarm, it goes off on my alarm every morning at whatever time at Howard Stern.
6.45.
Well, no, that does go.
So it's supposed to go off at like, they start at like six my time I think, but like, yeah.
I don't always listen to the whole thing.
That's very early in the morning for that.
I love, but it helps me wake up and they're like, they're the best.
The only thing that I do in the morning sometimes is if I'm in the shower, I'll ask Alexa to
play the news for me and I think that it's NPR.
Oh, well guess what?
They interviewed Lizzo on Monday.
NPR or Howard Stern?
Howard Stern.
And I want to listen to it so bad.
I turned it off because I was so tired because I don't know what I did on Sunday, but I think
I set it up for- You were at my house.
We were editing.
Oh, that's right.
We weren't up late.
We weren't up late, but I came home and I like, the next morning I like couldn't, I
like snoozed it until like 7.15 and I was like, oh, I can't listen to it.
And so I was like, I don't want to start it now and I'm going to go back and listen to
it.
But like, I'm really excited to listen to that.
All right.
Well, let us know what you find out then.
Yeah.
Because I think Liz, and he talked about it this morning again about how he learned some
stuff from Lizzo or something and I was like, oh, that's cute.
All right.
I'm excited to hear what it is.
She's cool.
Okay.
So my next FMK is, all right.
So these are going to be like interesting.
I'm nervous.
All right.
So the first one is Lil Dicky.
The second one is Weird Al Yankovic.
Oh my God.
How do you say that?
Yankovic?
I don't care.
Cause I was like, I'm killing him.
I don't even know.
I'm killing him.
I don't even need to know who the third one is.
The Lonely Island.
You know, knock it out like the SNL guy.
Isn't that a good one?
I'm fucking Lil Dicky just cause he's your boyfriend.
Then I'm a very lonely Island.
And you're going to kill weird out?
I'm gonna fuck your boyfriend all the while bitching about Leigh-Anne Rimes being a homewrecker.
I'm marrying little Dicky.
Little Dicky.
Excuse me.
Is it little Dicky or little Dicky?
I don't know.
I think you know the answer to that.
I'm fucking the lonely island because, you know, and then I'm killing Mary Delle.
But you know, that's it.
You weird owl.
Gross.
Okay.
So do we want to get into it now?
Yeah, let's get into it with Brandon and finish off our chat with him for part two.
Alright, you guys enjoy.
Alright, can I ask my next question?
Yes.
What do you think people most often don't understand about you?
My face.
I have a RBF pretty bad and then people always think that I'm always mad or upset about something,
which is the exact opposite.
Like I'm just like, I don't care.
I'm just like, whatever.
I think it's because you're monitoring, like you say your face doesn't ever look like.
Yeah.
He raises an eyebrow and makes weird faces.
I don't think you have an RBF though.
I think you make funny faces, but I think your voice is like what is makes people think
you're like, sometimes you'll say something.
I can't see your face.
And I'm like, is he for real?
I don't know.
No, he makes funny faces and raises his eyebrow.
He's very sarcastic and he does like sarcastic stuff a lot.
Your face is sarcastic.
My face is sarcastic.
And I've only met him like four times or something.
My face is sarcastic.
Yes.
I'm kind of curious, what did I say in the car the other day?
You're like, fuck man.
A lot of things.
It was great.
And I thought it was funny.
What did you say?
You said stuff back.
I don't even know how many times I've been in the car with you.
Was it?
Oh, this is when we went to the UAB game, right?
Well, wasn't I in the car with you another time?
And you were like, yeah, it wasn't when the UAB game.
I just would crack up because you would say something and it would just be real serious.
And everybody's kind of like, oh, is this about the lion?
The lion?
It's like, oh yeah.
What was his name?
At the zoo.
Yeah.
We were walking by that.
I was like, oh, there's the zoo.
I knew where the zoo was.
I know exactly where the zoo was.
Yeah, yeah.
Tell me about the, what's this lion thing?
So we were in the car.
We're heading up to the UAB basketball game.
And then Mason was just like, oh yeah, there's, no, I was sitting there going, I was like,
oh look, it's the Birmingham zoo.
I've never knew where it was.
I knew exactly where it was.
And then Mason was like, oh yeah, that's where they lost the lion.
I was like, oh my God, did they find it?
Oh yeah.
That was one of the things that you said.
I was like, oh my God.
But I knew that, but I feel like I was in a car.
That's just a dad joke.
I was somewhere with you before that car ride.
Because when I was in that car ride, I was like, oh, he's just being funny and that's
just how he is.
But the first time I got in the car with you, so yeah, so I thought that, I don't know who
we were with, but didn't we go somewhere else?
But we were in a car together?
Yeah.
I think it was a car or we were going somewhere.
Did y'all come to pick me up for something?
No, the first time you'd ever been over here was on Sunday, right?
Here at this place?
Yeah.
No, this is the first time I've ever been to your place.
No, I know, but to pick her up.
In the car?
Yes.
Yeah.
Mason and I were in the car together.
But we were on the way back.
Back from.
From UAB.
No.
We went to, did we go to Rosen DJ's or something?
He's never been there.
No.
Did we go to Santana's?
You were never in the car with me.
Well, maybe, I don't know where it was, but you were making some comments and I was like,
whoa.
And then I realized, I mean, I knew you were being sarcastic, but I was like, dang, this
is like bold for a newbie.
You know, like a newbie to the group.
Like that's kind of bold.
Were we just at Santana's?
Because it was like very sarcastic.
I was going to say it's like, cause the last few times it's been you, all of us at Santana's
the first time and then the second time.
And then we went to the UAB game.
That's the only times I've met you?
Yeah, I guess.
Yeah.
It's a launch party.
And then I think it was this past weekend.
And then.
Is it only three times?
It was Sunday and I went to the UAB game.
And then today's the number four.
Number four.
That's our fourth date, Brandon.
Let me jot this down real quick.
It's a triple date.
When we were in the car, I was like, I started cracking up when you said it.
Cause I was like, oh my God, this is hilarious.
I think it's funny, but like, I don't know.
When I first heard you be like sarcastic, I was like, I couldn't see your face for, that's
why I think we were in a car.
Or maybe you were in the car with me and he was on speaker phone or something.
Maybe that's what it was.
I don't know.
There's a high probability to that.
Yeah, but I couldn't see your face.
I was like, I don't know.
He is bold.
And then I thought it was funny.
That's what I'm saying.
Oh, I mean, but I can tell you're just like a sarcastic, you know what?
Maybe a whole.
What?
Oh, okay.
I don't know.
I don't know what it could be.
I'm like, I don't know.
I'm trying to get a cursing spelling bee.
One, one, one podcast.
That'd be hilarious.
What if, because like all those words are easy.
They're like three letter words.
Four letter words.
Why are you rolling your eyes?
I spelled ashtray wrong in the second grade spelling bee.
Did you spell it as s tray?
No, I s I forgot the h ashtray.
Tway.
Ashtray.
Ass-tray.
So it's A-S-tray.
Yeah.
No, wait.
Ass-tway.
Yeah.
You said tway, like T-W-A-Y.
I don't know.
Because you're a child, you had tway?
Yeah, I guess, but also fuck everybody in second grade for giving that to a child to
spell.
Jerks.
Well, honey, guess what?
When I was young, and you people cannot judge me for this because I did not know any better.
I grew up in Alabama, okay.
Where are we going with this?
I know.
But listen, so I was in Nashville one time with my family.
How hard on the pain are we going?
And we were staying at this really nice hotel.
It's like on a railroad track.
I forgot what it's called.
And I saw homeless people outside.
And I'm like a tiny little girl.
And I looked at my mom and dad and I'm like, look, mommy and daddy, it's the homos.
Look at the homos.
And I get like, and my mom and dad were like, what?
The what?
I was like the homos.
They were like, oh my God.
I meant to say hobo, but I thought it was home.
I thought it meant like a home.
Oh, like homeless home.
Oh, like, you know, like you put like, oh, at the end of stuff that you don't have, like
homo.
But I kept saying homo and they just like, they think it's like hilarious that I thought
that hobos were homos.
But also it's like really terrible at the same time.
I'm like, oh God.
I was the worst child.
I didn't mean it.
I didn't know any better.
OK, so.
All right.
So we.
Onto the next.
Yes.
Onto the next one.
Let's do this.
OK.
What one word would your family use to describe you?
I feel like that'd be two of them.
Bear or ADHD, even though it's an acronym.
Oh my God.
He was, I knew, I was thinking in my head, he already told us bear.
Or ADHD, which is an acronym.
And they describe you as ADHD.
Yeah.
You can't bear.
I don't think bear qualifies.
OK, fine.
I'm not really a bear.
I feel like you're like a comedian.
You're like laid back.
Laid back.
Smoking on.
Sipping on gin and juice.
Laid back with my mind on my money and my money on my mind.
That's how I feel about you.
I'm Snoop Dogg.
That's not Snoop Dogg though.
Yes, it is.
We did this the other day on that show thing and I won and everybody remember.
Yeah, but.
Oh, you weren't there.
You weren't there.
Yeah, but it was a good show.
I was like, oh, I'm going to be a comedian.
I'm going to be a comedian.
I'm going to be a comedian and everybody remember.
Oh, you weren't there.
You weren't there.
Yeah, but isn't it with Blues Travelers too?
Blues Travelers?
No.
We need to cut that out because that's embarrassing.
Or keep it in because that's embarrassing.
There is a version that's not.
It's not Blues Travelers.
Who is it?
I know what you're talking about, but yeah.
And it's not OAR either with Crazy Game of Poker.
It's something else.
Anyways.
All right.
So I'm going to ask the next one then.
Go.
All right.
You have to listen.
Okay.
Look at my face.
What's a lesson you learned from either your last relationship or just you learned from
any relationship in general that you want to, I guess, do differently or what have you
moving forward?
That's a lot.
I think that's the part where I'm, I told you.
I mean, like, I think that's what I've had a lot of shit relationships.
Some on my part, some on the other, the girls part.
Some on the Heather?
Heather.
The other.
Other.
I thought you said the Heather, like that was her, the girls name.
It sounded like that.
Yeah.
And I was like, dang, called out.
Okay.
But I think in the past relationships, I think it's always been about patience is a really
important one.
That you don't have a lot of?
No, I think I got a lot of patience.
Well, I do too.
That's why I'm asking.
Um, I think you need a lot of that going into a relationship because you may not always
agree with somebody and you need to be patient enough to, and then also communicate about
what it is that you're trying to explain to people.
And I know sometimes I come off pretty articulate, but then there's other times where I'm trying
to explain something and I have no idea how to express it.
And I am guilty of that many times in my life.
Or many years where I just try, I'm trying to talk to somebody and I'm trying to say
something and I just can't find the words.
Uh, so patience and communication is definitely huge.
We, you and I talk about that all the time.
And then also just openness and like entirely openness, like mentally, physically, and emotionally,
just be open about, just tell people what you're thinking and how you're feeling and
just be out with it.
And I think all those past relationships I've had, I've kind of got to the point where,
you know, over this past years, the last couple of years of between therapy and own personal
thinking and enlightenment or however you want to paint it, I've just kind of got to
the point where I just go like, this is what I want to do in my relationship now.
And this is how I want to move forward in my life as a person.
And you and I connect on that way.
And there's sometimes I try to do that with people at work or whatever the case may be.
And it doesn't work very well because some people, not everybody's open.
I agree with that.
Yeah.
I mean, that's totally fair.
And that's sad.
Cause there's sometimes you want to talk to people about stuff and they just don't want
to listen to you.
They just go, okay, cool.
Thanks.
And then they just turn around and walk away.
And I was like, man, I was trying to have a deep conversation.
Well, sometimes, okay.
So like, I felt like right now you were deep conversationing with us and I kind of picked
up my phone and it may have, yeah, I know.
And it may have come off as me not wanting, but I just picked it up really quick because
I got a text message and I read it.
And then I thought it might be important, but it wasn't important.
But I was listening to you.
That sucks.
Sometimes it, you may not think that other people want to like listen and have that conversation,
but maybe they, maybe they're coming off as sometimes people's vibes don't show what they're
actually like thinking, which I've, I've tried to get better at sometimes, you know, like
understanding that people, just because somebody has this like look on their face, but also
we as human beings need to get better as at showing that we like, instead of like being
like, okay, well my, maybe my vibe, the way that I look and the way that I present myself
in my body language doesn't look like that, but I am listening, but we need to get better
at like doing the body language that goes with it because it helps body language is
way better.
I mean, I think that I've, I'm sorry.
Well, what I was going to say is I think no offense, but I mean, this is also a huge distraction
and it is terrible.
And then not only is this a huge distraction, but this is also a great escape.
So here I am trying to have a deep conversation with you about something and how easy is it
for you to pick up or pull it out of your pocket and just fucking zone out while I'm
trying to talk to you about something like, Hey, your dog did this.
What's up?
And you're just like, whatever, you know, and what's being referenced right now is pulling
your phone out in the middle of a conversation.
Yeah.
I mean, that's not a dig at you.
I'm just saying like in reference.
No, no, no.
And I called myself out on that because I did that.
And Sarah used to do that a lot with our podcasting and I would like ask her a question and she'd
be like, like you did earlier.
And I'd be like, Sarah, you're not allowed to have your phone.
And she's done so good.
I'm like really applauding you right now.
Like round of applause because she has done so good at like realizing she does.
She takes good like constructive criticism.
Thank you.
Yeah.
Sometimes, sometimes it's not like constructive criticism.
I'm just like, Sarah, put your phone away.
Well, I mean, I appreciate that.
But like, I think it's one of those things where you and I are very open with each other
and that is just the friendship that we have.
And anytime that you tell me, you know, something like that, like I try to really soak it in
and make a point of being better about whatever it is that like I need to do different.
Yeah.
Because I'm not going to tell you something like dumb.
Like I'm not going to be like, hey, if you were like only did it once or something, I'd
be like, no, that's okay.
Yeah.
I think that's the other problem is what is this?
Catching vibes.
You know, like you're trying to have a conversation with her about something or whatever the case
may be, or you're trying to talk to somebody else at work or something.
And it was like, maybe they're just not vibing the same way.
Right.
And sometimes people have other things on their mind.
Yeah.
And especially at work.
Like sometimes I'll be in a meeting and I'll be like, like today that happened today, I
was in this meeting for this like training for the same.
And I was like, in my head, I kept telling me, telling myself, be present, be present,
be present.
Do not think about all these other things that you have to do when you really don't
need to be doing this.
You already know how to do this.
But I, and it was, it was helpful because I actually learned like some, I didn't learn
it at anything new, but I learned how this like new little organization works sort of.
So and I was able to ask questions and things like that.
But like it's, it's hard when you have a million things going on and being an adult, being
an adult sucks.
They told me, so I don't want to go back to like living in high school where I can't like
do what I want to do.
But I mean, it might be nice sometimes like for the, like, like six months out of the
year.
I think it's important to learn the things that can be helpful for you, whether it be
through therapy, self-development, self-reflection, whatever it is, or even like a review at work,
you know, constructive criticism is perfectly fine.
And sometimes you have to do that with yourself and that's one of the hardest things that
you have to do.
Yeah.
Check yourself.
Yeah, for sure.
I mean, I think as far as being in a new relationship, that is one thing that like I've definitely
had to do here as of late is either say what I'm feeling as far as like today, I was feeling
very overwhelmed and very anxious.
The moving situation, there's boxes all over my apartment.
My apartment has never looked like this before and it's killing me.
I hate it.
It's only because you haven't moved in like 15 years.
I know that.
I know.
But like it's really killing me.
Like it's my vibes are like all the time right now because I'm just over it.
I want to move.
I want to get done with.
I want to get back organized.
I want everything to be in its proper place.
And then, you know, I have Brandon staying with me sporadically and it's new.
Yeah.
And sometimes it's like overwhelming.
And then also this podcast is new and it's like we spent a lot of time doing this.
Well, hell yeah.
And then having him come tonight, I'm like, oh my God, what?
I'm like, ugh.
I don't know.
But why are you so like, don't you think this is going here?
I know.
But don't you think this has gone great?
Like, I think it's gone so well.
Like, haven't you learned new stuff about him?
Absolutely I have.
And but I also like sent a text message today because I felt myself being like disconnected
a little bit and like not my normal communicative self.
Yeah.
And I was like, I'm really sorry.
I'm being quiet today.
Here's how I'm feeling.
You know, whatever.
I'm going to talk through it and we're fine.
Well, that's nice that you do that.
I don't do that.
If somebody if I'm just being quiet, I'm like, I'm quiet because I'm quiet.
And like if somebody wants to know why I'm quiet, they can ask.
Well, what I loved about that text message was like her and I talked throughout the day
because, you know, we have different jobs and stuff.
But I mean, like, I never thought for a second that you were being quiet at all.
Like it was just like we were just doing.
I felt that in myself, though.
Yeah.
And I was so when she finally sent me a text message about like, hey, I'm sorry for being
disconnected or quiet and so on and so forth.
I'm just going through a lot.
And I just finally went, OK, well, what's going on?
Like talk to me.
And then she sends me this text about everything that's going on.
And I was just like, oh, OK.
And then, you know, we talked it out and all this other stuff.
And I was like, I'm right here.
So I was like, wherever you need, just let me know.
I was like, you need help moving.
Let's go.
You haven't asked me, but I'm here.
Let's do it.
Oh, no, I need all the help.
You haven't asked me either.
And I thought about that the other day when you were like, I can't go to whatever we were
going like Jessica asked us to go to the thing.
And you were like, I have to pack.
You said no.
You said I need to pack.
And I was like, oh, she just said she needed to pack.
So like that doesn't mean I was going to send a message back and be like, well, that didn't
mean you have to pack so you can still come.
Well, I did.
So I guess in full transparency to the people on the podcast, last Thursday, I flew up to
Philly for my company holiday party and I flew right back on Friday and Emily came over
on Friday night and we edited the podcast for what is will drop tomorrow, not this one.
And then Saturday, I mean, Brandon stayed that night and he went up and got went to
work and I just needed like a low key day.
So like I was very weird about like my day and I got up and I like made breakfast and
hung out for a little while.
And then I would pause like whatever show I was watching and pack a little bit or organize
and throw things away and like whatever, you know, compartmentalize like boxes and whatever.
But I just took my time doing it because that's how I needed to get it done that day.
Well, I felt like I needed that day too, because I feel like I've been go, go, go, go, go,
go, go.
Yes, you should say I know.
Did you see what I said?
I was like, I was supposed to stay home and do laundry and clean my house and watch the
second season of what's this show called with Big Mouth?
No, no.
Rick and Morty.
No, is that a second season?
No, they have a lot of seasons.
What's the show?
It's got Katherine Heigl in it.
Oh, Firefly Lane.
Seinfeld.
Oh my God.
Brandon, you're such a gem.
You're fired.
Is she not in that?
No.
Definitely not.
I think she was not born at that point.
Oh, that's Jason Alexander.
I was way off.
Oh my God.
Yeah.
So yeah, Firefly Lane.
I started it and then like halfway through the first episode tech.
I was like 10 minutes in Jessica sends that message and I'm like, I'll come.
Of course I will.
I immediately responded.
I had a little bit of FOMO and I was like, maybe I should just like get in the shower
and then I want to go or whatever.
And I was like, no, I'm not because I knew what I needed to do.
And I'm glad you did that.
I did what I mostly, I honestly, I got home by like five o'clock or six o'clock or something.
Wait, that's not the same thing.
That was for the game.
I know I didn't, I didn't get home till like midnight maybe or later.
Later.
Was it later?
Yeah.
Boo.
For sure.
All right.
Anyways, we only have two questions left.
Let's do this.
I think we skipped one though.
No, you skipped a couple.
We ended up going back to them.
I have no idea what the questions are.
We ended up going back to them.
So the last, one of the last two is already, look, can I say this?
What I told you?
We, it's already out there.
I already said it.
Yeah, but you can say it again.
Okay.
Well, anyways, I said that I told Sarah before she, after you met, before I met you.
No, wait, where was it?
It was not.
It was after y'all first met.
No, it wasn't.
Yes, it was.
It was after they, y'all first met.
It was, I said, I have a feeling, cause you guys had that whole like, we were at your
parents' house, remember?
And then we came back and that was after your first date and everything.
I wasn't there.
And I was like-
You said it after we met.
After you met, yes.
Okay.
After you met.
I said, okay.
After you first met and everything.
And I told Sarah, I was like, I don't know what conversation we were having, but she
told me something.
I don't know.
But I was like, I just got, I just had this feeling that this is it.
This is it for you.
And I have feelings.
I don't know.
I have good feelings.
And I think it is.
And I'm telling you, I don't know.
I'm not trying to say I have superpowers or anything, but I just have, I don't know what
to say.
You're empathic, is that what you're trying to say?
Possibly.
And people have told me that before.
But also, I don't know, I have good-
ESP.
I have a good read.
But I haven't even met you yet.
But I could tell-
That's what it was.
I had gone out with him, but you had not met him yet.
Okay.
Yeah.
And I was like, I don't know what you were going to do.
And I was like, Sarah, I can just tell you right now, I think based on the conversations,
she had been sharing some, not anything personal, she hadn't read your text messages, but this
is what girls do.
We talk about the new guys we're dating and stuff, and the things that she was sharing
with me, and the way that she was feeling and stuff like that.
And I was just like, I can just tell that she, this is it.
And I don't know about y'all, how y'all feel about it, but maybe it is, maybe it isn't.
We'll see how it goes.
And we'll see if I'm right.
If I am, dang.
Are you going to appreciate my wedding as well?
Sure.
I'm so going to start a company.
Oh shoot, I hit the lamp.
I'm going to start a company and we're going to like, but you have to be-
We should call it ride or die.
Ride or die.
Yeah.
Or like best friend versus life partner.
Life partner.
It's just the same thing.
But yeah.
So anyways.
Okay.
So we're going to do the life thing.
Are you mad?
Huh?
Are you mad?
Yeah.
Why are you mad?
Because you're not her best friend yet?
I don't care about being her best friend, but I mean, if I was to put somebody in a car
with me that was going to be my ride or die, she would be it.
I know.
I wouldn't even think twice about it.
But like I said, this is where we're different.
Listen, so do you, so Sarah has, and I don't know your past relationships and stuff.
Yeah.
And I'm not trying to get into Sarah's past relationships, but she's been burned sometimes.
Yeah, I know.
She's told me about them.
And it's been not great.
And we-
And she's had-
We still talk about that and I keep telling her, I was like, I'm not, I have no-
And I told her that.
I'm like, I told her, I'm like, she has had some bad ones and I have not met a lot of
them.
But I, and I haven't met any of them actually, have I?
Have I?
I don't think I've met any of them.
But this last dude, not you, obviously, the last dude, he was-
That's not even the worst.
Yeah.
He's not even the worst.
And he was bad.
Like it was, it was like toxic, like not good.
I think she just picked the wrong guys.
She finally found somebody that's good and I'm happy for her.
And she, but I don't think she realizes, she doesn't know how to, I don't know, maybe
I'm putting words and thoughts into you, but like-
No, I'm like, I want to hear what you have to say.
I'm sure.
I don't feel like you know how to, she's not, not know, she doesn't know how to, she knows
how to.
She isn't able to open up to you like that yet because it's so early and she needs some
time and it's going to take up and it's going to take a minute.
And I think y'all probably had conversations about this already.
And I think she gets very scared that she's going to get burned again.
And so-
We've had this conversation.
Yeah.
We've had this conversation.
And I am making this all up.
I haven't had this conversation with her at all.
No.
At all.
She hasn't.
I'm just making it up.
I don't know.
No, we've, we've had this-
This was, I mean, this was actually part of a text that I sent him today.
Yeah.
Really?
Okay.
Yeah.
And he sent that to me and I was like, I feel the exact same way, but I mean, like, what
did, I mean, I can't remember everything I said, but I was like, you know, it's like,
we've both gone through a lot or whatever, you know, we've talked about different things
in the past about it.
It's like, we've all gone through a lot and now we're in this point in our life right
now where I feel like we're both in good places and I feel like we're both mentally in good
places and emotionally.
And I feel like this is a good stuff for both of us.
You know, and then you say what you say, you know, usually you can agree with me.
And then, but we also fear that this is not, I say we were afraid of this, but not we're
afraid that this really is it.
And that's not a bad thing about it.
We just agree that we just both agree like this really is probably the both of us.
Yeah.
And it's scary to think that sometimes where it's just like,
it's scary to feel like this could be the great thing that we both think it is.
And then it not be, no, I wasn't even going to say that.
I was just going to say like, there's also a fear of the other shoe is going to drop
and it's going to be a shit storm.
And then where, what do you do?
But that's the thing is like you, Sarah, especially because I don't know how to let myself live
in the moment and 100% you need to, instead of being like, Oh no, he did this or something.
You'd be like, and that's a red flag or something.
Boom.
Oh my God.
I'm freaked out.
As she, I think that she, like you could say, you could, you could like, like poop in your
hand and not really.
Okay.
That was, that was, I don't know.
I'm so glad you brought this up.
You could do something.
All right.
Like poop in your hand.
No, poop in my hand.
I'm like, I don't know.
You could like do something really small.
You could like spill your drink.
Like poop in my hand?
Yes.
Like that's so small.
I hope that doesn't upset her.
You could like, you could like spill your drink or something.
And she would be like, Oh my God, he spills his drink.
I can't do this anymore.
But I think that's because she's scared that, and spilling your drink is a metaphor for
something else.
Like not a metaphor, but like, you know what I mean?
Like tea.
Yes.
Spill your tea.
No, not a tea.
No, that's not what I meant.
But she could, she would be like that and she needs to be talked down from the ledge
basically because she doesn't really, she does, she knows what she has, but she's scared
that she's going to get hurt.
But he's very good about allowing me with no judgment to voice my concerns, insecurities,
whatever.
Yes.
Which is why you need to stop freaking out so much.
I'm not freaking out.
So good.
I know this and, but that's, I'm happy that I can live in a Brandon.
Um, no, I think it's, it's just hard for me to live in this world where I am dating this
human that is very, very, very wonderful without feeling like the other shoe is going to dry
up and something is going to be terrible.
And I think even though I'm almost 35 years old, it's also scary to think that, and what
I think a lot of people would think is like a very short time period, even though we've
known each other for like over a year, that this could be, you know, my end all be all,
you know, and not in a negative way, but I think it's, it was me.
I think it's scary.
Did you fart?
No, my chair hit the table.
Jesus Christ.
No.
And like I said, we've had this conversation where it's like we, I agreed with you.
I just like, this is, I knew if I want to date with you, I would end up dating you.
I knew it.
And I told you, I was like, I knew that if we ended up dating, I would end up dating
you.
Like seriously.
And I think, but I think that that's one thing that like, I really appreciated about you
is even though we were in communication for a very long time, you did, you know, kind
of pump the brakes and put everything into perspective and be like, I don't know if I'm
staying here.
I don't know if I'm staying local and I don't want to, you know, do that to you or myself.
And I don't want to meet you and have something, you know, fantastic get started.
And then I have to go somewhere else.
No, I've told you that a couple of times.
Yeah.
And I was like, I don't want us to be dating.
And then it turns out there's this wonderful relationship starting or whatever it may be.
Yeah.
And then it's like, oh, by the way, I'm moving to Miami.
Thanks.
Yeah.
Cause I'm not living in Miami.
All right.
We have one, one question.
All right.
Yeah.
So I think that this is a good question.
I think we should do it.
Do you know your love language?
This is a Sarah thing.
And I don't, I can't remember mine, but I think I know what it is.
But do you know what it is?
Hold on, hold on.
He's smiling so big at me.
Does he even know what it is?
He doesn't know what it is.
We literally talked about this today.
I do talk about it today.
Sarah, what's my love language?
I have to...
No, you, I want you to tell me.
No, no, no.
Sarah knows because we literally just got done talking about this.
Did you take the test?
No.
Yeah.
But also at the same time, like my ex was really into it, which was really funny to
me because we had completely opposite love languages.
So, um...
Was her name Heather?
No.
No, no.
No, it's not.
Acts of service, physical touch.
You have three?
Yeah, everybody has three.
That's right, that's right.
You have two minors and one major.
I'm going to look minor.
I cannot believe I know this shit.
Hang on.
I don't know what third one is.
Gift giving, remember?
Yes.
Because I said if I ever brought you a tell you ride home.
Oh, yes.
Don't finish that sentence.
I'm going to look minor.
Don't finish that sentence.
I just left it at that.
Thank you.
But, but I ended up, I was like, these are my three love languages.
And I go, so I'm going to spoil you.
You're just going to have to fucking deal with it.
I have five.
Oh, well.
They're in, hold on.
These are old.
I don't think these are right.
There's like five or six.
Aren't there five love languages, period?
So, my first one, my top one is acts of service.
Minor words of affirmation.
And then, what's your next one?
You tell me all yours first.
Mine, my first one is words of affirmation.
My second, and this is what I need to receive, not what I give.
Oh, I don't know the difference.
Words of affirmation, acts of service, and physical touch.
But I feel like I'm good at giving acts of service and words of affirmation.
I feel like words of affirmation you're better at.
And gift giving.
I think I'm good at those.
You're good at gift giving.
If I were to place those, I would place, for you, I would place, what was the first one?
What was the other one that I said?
Words of affirmation, and then you would do gift giving, and then I would say acts of
service.
But okay, so my, no, maybe quality time, because you like to spend quality time.
Quality time's good.
I do like to, that's fair.
I like to spend quality time.
And my version of quality time can often be existing in the same space, even with no words.
Exactly.
And that's what I mean.
That's why I said that, because I feel like you like to hang out.
I think I like quality time.
I like to give and get quality time more than gift giving, maybe.
What is this?
How?
My dog keeps getting down here, even though there's a gate.
Cri-e-houdini.
She's like the hooney-dini dog.
Okay, so mine from, this is a long time ago, and I don't know if this is the right mine
or somebody else's, but I'm pretty sure this is right.
So it's acts of service, and it's like a score way above all the others.
Acts of service is my big one.
I feel like if you have time, because I feel like my time is very valuable, and if I give
my time to somebody else, that's a lot.
So I also feel like if somebody else were to like, having somebody help me do something
is like the freaking best thing that they could do.
Acts of service, quality time, then words of affirmation, and then physical touch, and
then receiving gifts are my list.
So acts of service is like 11 points, six points quality time, six points words of affirmation,
six points physical touch, and six points receiving gifts.
But most of the time, I've talked to guys who have been like, what's your love language?
And I tell them, and they're like, I'm like, what's yours?
They're like, physical touch is number one.
And I'm like, well, dang, because that's not going to match with me.
I think all guys just automatically assume that's what it is, and I can understand why,
because I'm one of them.
They want to be touched.
Because we want the physical touch, and we want to be able to, whatever the case may
be.
I honestly believe that, I mean, I know what I like to receive.
I like to receive physical touch, of course.
I like to receive quality time.
So I mean, like the times that you and I sit on the couch watching TV doing absolutely nothing.
I'm in my zone.
I'm in my happy space.
Oh, I'm good too.
100%.
I mean-
I'm in my happy place where I can just sit there with my girl, hang out, watch TV, and
hang out with the dog.
Just the three of us on the couch.
I'm loving it.
And then I think a lot of times that guys don't understand is how much words of affirmation
from our women is how important it is to us.
Her telling me she loves me is amazing, but then she tells me other things also, and it's
just like I love her even more.
And I think a lot of guys fail to acknowledge that.
How important it is for their girlfriend to go, I'm proud of you.
Thank you for everything you do.
I appreciate you.
I will fucking-
Well, sometimes maybe don't-
I will fucking kill anybody else playing for you.
Maybe that's not their love language.
You can say that to me.
I will give you the moon if I could.
She's good at that.
She's really good at that.
Yeah.
And I think that's-
I'm not as good at that.
And I feel like I need to be better.
I try to be better, but I don't feel like I'm very good at being like-
What?
Words of affirmation?
Yeah, words of affirmation.
I am a- I'm also- I feel like I do give acts of service.
You 1,000% give acts of service, and this is something that we have actually talked
about as- Well, and she may not even acknowledge this, but as far as the podcast goes, because
she will take the initiative to do research and do editing before I even say anything
about it.
And I, all the time, tell her, I don't think I do enough for this.
I don't think that-
She says that all the time, and I'm like, no, you're doing so much.
What are you doing?
She does the same thing to me.
She's like, I feel like you do so much, and I don't do any little- I was like, you do
so much for me in this relationship.
I think she's manipulating us into doing more for her.
Just kidding, she's not.
Well, I mean, she says that to me, and I tell her all the time.
I was like, no.
It's like, you're doing great.
We wouldn't do it if we thought you were not going to doing enough or not contributing,
then we wouldn't do it.
I mean, I feel like that.
I think it's-
I would be like, you would know.
You would see like a, there'd be animosity, kind of.
They'd be like, oh my God, why aren't you doing enough?
I think that's probably fair, but I think also that I just want to make sure that I'm
pulling my weight, and I think because sometimes I feel like I steamroll people, and just my-
I have a big personality, and I have a lot of opinions, and I think sometimes I seem
to steamroll people, and I don't want to feel like that I'm doing that with any of y'all,
and so I try to double, triple check in with you to make sure that you are getting what
you need from me, and it goes for both of you.
All right.
I need you right now to get down to do 50 pushups.
I'm just kidding.
I don't even know-
That ain't fucking happening.
I was like, I don't know if I can do 50 pushups.
You can do it on your knees if you want.
Girl, you couldn't do 50 pushups on your knees.
I bet you I could.
You want to try?
You want to do a-
No, I'm good.
You want to do a competition.
I bet you I can do 50 pushups on my knees.
I think this would be something for the Instagram.
All right.
So I do have one more thing.
Do you guys know what your Enneagram number is?
Yes.
12?
Yes.
100%.
That's it.
I don't know.
No, I'm a two wing three.
A two.
Interesting.
I thought you were a three wing two.
Also I thought you might possibly be an eight because I feel like you're more of an-
Don't put that shit on me.
You're more of an eight.
I have an eight.
What is this?
It's an Enneagram.
It's like a personality test.
You know like the Myers Briggs personality test?
Is it like the palm?
Not like reading your palm, no.
Oh, okay.
It's a little different.
You're a little lady and she's like-
You want to know what you can do tomorrow while I have all my meetings?
Take that test.
Go to the psychic?
No.
It only takes like five minutes.
It's not a psychic.
Are you joking?
The Enneagram test?
Yeah, it's really short.
No, it is not.
It's not that long.
Maybe 10 minutes.
Which Enneagram test are you taking?
I don't know.
Whatever Victoria told me to take.
She's a therapist.
Do I study?
No, it doesn't take that long.
No.
We do not study for it.
You answer questions honestly.
About your habits and things.
Like your personal habit.
Like how you are and what you think and things like that.
It's easy.
It's not a hard test.
Oh, no.
It's not a test.
It's just like a survey kind of thing.
Like how you feel this out and then we'll tell you what we think you are.
Like you're a part of this.
You know.
Is this like which Ninja Turtle you are?
Yes.
I love this.
It's like what are they called?
The Buzzfeed.
Okay, so listen, those quizzes have gotten so dumb.
Yeah.
Like I wish they would actually match the personality of the Ninja Turtle or of the
Gilmore girl or of the whoever you're trying to match.
Like the golden girl.
I can do Donatello and I'm like I am not Donatello.
I don't know why you guys can't tell.
Donatello?
I love Donatello.
Why do you all keep putting me in a color?
What color is Donatello?
Is he purple?
Yeah, he's a purple one.
I like purple Donatello.
Now we know why you said earlier if I tell you not to think about the color purple, what
are you going to think about?
Yeah, that's it.
That's how I peppered this into the podcast real quick.
Don't think about the color purple.
By the way, Donatello is six hours later.
Is it better to be a purple than a golden?
I don't know.
But the question is, what color do you like?
And it has all the colors of the Ninja Turtles there.
And it's like whichever one you pick, you get.
And then you answer all these stupid other questions.
Like, are you happy or sad?
And it's like so dumb and then you still get the one that you picked the color of.
Yeah.
I don't know.
So, okay.
That was good.
It was nice to meet you, Brandon.
I see you're tired.
So we can we can let you go.
But.
Oh, thanks.
Or you can stay.
We can stay and have a party.
Don't tell Sarah.
Hey, will you guys stay though?
I know it's tired time, but at least save our 20 minutes.
Yeah, let's wrap this up.
Okay.
So thanks for coming.
Thanks, babe, for being here.
Thank you so much.
Hey, you guys can find us.
He's probably going to break up with me.
After that, so stay tuned for that episode.
Yeah, stay tuned for that.
We are on Instagram, a thick podcast.
And you can find us anywhere where you can get your podcasts, download, listen, like,
give us a rating and a review and we'll see you next week.
Thank you so much.
Toodle-oo.
Mother truckers.
Sarah.
Love you.
ABCDEFG.
I have to go.
I don't know why it's so good.
I like it.
So good.