Welcome to the Thicc AF Podcast, everyone.
Hey.
Hello, we're back.
My name is Emily.
And this is Sarah.
We're so happy to be here today, guys.
Can't wait to discover some more cool things about everybody.
So today, you know, we've got that FMK for you.
Otherwise known as Fuck Mary Kill because Cramsey doesn't like the F word.
Well, you know, it's just not good.
So my parents would be not proud.
I mean, I don't think mine are thrilled either, but it comes with the territory because now we've made it a part of things.
Yeah, I guess.
So and then we're going to talk about some, you know, some other things about like living with a boyfriend, girlfriend, partner.
And then also, like if you've ever created a Finsta and I didn't know what a Finsta was, but we'll get into that in a few minutes.
So Sarah's going to lead us off on that.
So anyways, how's it been going?
Going fantastical.
Good.
I'm so happy to be here with you tonight.
One of my favorite days of the week is hanging out with Sarah to record the podcast.
It really is.
It is my favorite day.
It's my favorite day.
And I think that we have like almost highs and lows because oh, no, my drink is so strong.
You should not look at my reactions.
I just we just went up and made a drink and we did.
We put this like we put makers mark and it's like I got a Walmart order a long time ago and they like sent me the wrong order.
And it had like a hundred of these like liter bottles of peach and peach and orange spritzer drinks.
And so we were trying to use them because I feel bad throwing away because you know, I'm hoarder ish.
No, you've tried to give them away a ton of times, but they've actually come in handy example tonight because we like a bourbon like I like water with a slice of orange.
Yeah. So I mean, it worked out perfectly.
Anyways, I was the bartender.
I made her drink a little strong because she lives here and she doesn't have to drive.
Yeah, but holy moly.
I took a sip and it's like, whoa, listen, I did not even do two full shots.
It was it was two full shots.
I think you put more and you were like, this is yours.
And then you did yours and it was the same amount.
And I was like, hold on a second.
This is not right.
Okay.
True.
Anyways, so all right.
So let's get into it.
Yeah. Okay.
So my fuck, Mary kill of the week is and I really have no idea what your answer is going to be.
So I'm kind of excited about it, but it's margarita dirty martini in an old fashioned.
Oh snap.
Right.
Oh, you know, okay.
So I am allergic to agave, according to the doctors, but I can drink like a Montezuma's revenge.
Martin, I mean, in margarita, you know, you never have more Montezuma.
No, thank God I have it.
Montezuma is basically like, correct me if I'm wrong, but even I went to Phil Sandoval's in Huntsville over the weekend and I saw Phil and he was like, oh yeah, you can have some Montezuma.
And I'm like, yeah, because it's like flavored vodka.
Basically, it doesn't have any agave in it.
Tequila.
Tequila. Yeah, I'm allergic.
So I'm allergic to the stuff that's inside of it.
So not technically tequila.
Anyway, but I love, love margaritas.
But I will, like, I learned a very hard way that I was allergic to.
I'm not anaphylactic.
Anyways, it's a long story on that whole thing, but I'm not supposed to drink agave and freaking love margaritas.
Love them so much.
I would, if I wasn't allergic, I wouldn't, I wouldn't, what was the other two?
Margarita, dirty martini, and old fashioned.
Oh, so I would, I would marry a margarita if I wasn't allergic to agave.
I said there's two answers.
Okay, give your first answer.
First answer is no agave.
And so kill agave or margarita.
Kill margarita.
Oh no, no, hold on.
But like, if I'm not allowed to have agave, I would kill it.
And then I would fuck dirty martini and marry old fashioned.
Okay.
And then if I am allowed to have agave or if it's an agave-free margarita, then I would marry margarita, kill, kill dirty martini.
I don't know, maybe not.
And, and fuck the old fashioned.
What do you think?
I love the hell out of a margarita also.
I am going to marry a margarita, fuck a dirty martini, and kill an old fashioned.
And I am a big bourbon girl, but an old fashioned is not my favorite bourbon drink.
That's why I was like, sorry.
It's not mine either.
That's why I was kind of hesitant to say that because I knew it would be a good one because I love bourbon.
I do. And it's similar.
So it's similar, but I don't like all the sugar.
Agreed.
I do like the sugar and there's something else that they put in there that I'm not a huge fan of, but I do like the makers mark or like a bourbon with soda water, like a fresh with an orange.
My favorite bourbon drink these days is like a Kentucky mule.
Okay.
So like a ginger beer with bourbon.
Ginger.
I will do ginger beer with everything.
Ginger beer with vodka, ginger beer with mezcal.
Love it.
Mezcal.
I don't even know.
I've heard of that.
Smoky tequila.
Oh yeah.
That's why I don't know.
Because I'm not allowed.
I don't know if it has agave or not.
Probably.
100% probably.
I'm pretty sure if it's not, doesn't have agave, it's not really tequila.
So good.
Yeah.
Mezcal.
Yeah, I've seen it.
I know what it is.
And then like I hear it, but like I don't think I've ever had it because yeah, I'm not supposed to.
So all right.
What's next?
What you got?
I will do an off the cuff, fuck, Mary kill.
All right.
Let's do it.
Love this.
I am going to do, hang on a second, Ryan Gosling.
Oh Lord.
I think that he should have been in that last one.
Yes.
I have heard that feedback as well.
So Ryan Gosling will do Miles Teller.
Who the hell is that?
From.
I'm going to look at him.
Top one Maverick.
I'll look him up.
And, um, Jude Law.
No, no, no.
Miles Teller is from something else.
What is he?
Oh, I love him.
Did you hear my last?
Jude Law.
Yeah.
Oh Lord.
Okay.
Gosh.
He was like the best in the holiday.
Shout out to Melanie.
She loves that movie and my mom.
Okay.
So Jude Law.
Oh, I can't.
Why don't you go first?
Can you go first this time?
That would be great.
Thanks.
I'm just saying like, I don't know.
I don't know much about these peeps, so I'm going to get some.
I am going to buck miles.
Teller.
Fug miles.
Teller.
Mary Ryan Gosling and killed Jude Law.
Yeah.
I'm thinking that my might be the same.
So miles Teller.
I didn't know.
I forgot about him.
What does he end that?
I love him.
War dogs.
But he's also in what else is he in?
Two nights.
The spider head movie with, um, with a freaking.
Chris Hemsworth.
It's good.
It's on Netflix.
All right.
So Ryan Gosling, I'm going to marry.
I think I have the same as you.
Jude Law.
I'm going to kill because I don't think he's a drug.
I don't know why everybody loves him so much.
He is so good in the holiday.
But he's a good actor, but he's not that.
I don't know.
That's why I killed him.
And he seems really small too.
Yeah.
I don't know.
And I'm a.
I'm a pretty big girl.
Like I'm not a tiny lady.
Like I hear you.
I'm short, but I'm thick AF.
Just saying.
You don't say.
You don't say girls.
So that Brian Gosling, I like a tall.
I mean, everybody likes tall, but like, honestly, I've dated short guys and I don't hate that.
I'm not opposed to a short guy.
Look at you with your big eyes.
See that's messed up.
Like, listen.
Sometimes it just depends.
It's just not for me.
So there I have dated some short guys and they like kissing is easier.
You don't have to stand up.
You're taller than me though.
You're a lot taller than me.
What are you?
Five seven, five eight.
What are you?
Which one?
My license says five eight.
OK, but what are you in real life?
Probably five seven.
OK, you're a liar.
My license says five four and I'm five three and a half or something like that.
Both liars.
Well, but you know, five three and a half is different than a whole inch.
I'm probably five seven.
I'm round.
I rounded up.
Yeah, me too.
No, you didn't.
You would.
You did.
Did you do it with that?
Did you do it with that bun on the top of your head?
That two inches?
I'm allowed to come over here and look ratchet.
No, I like your butt.
Oh my God.
Don't even turn this on me.
OK, so it is not about that.
So anyways, but what I'm feeling added an extra inch and a half or two.
I'm giving my buns some credit, man.
Thank you.
Bun, bun, bun, bun, bun, bun.
Yeah.
So anyways, yeah, I'm the same as you with that with that one.
You got any more FM case or are we moving on?
No, I think we can move along.
Let's move on.
You ready?
Yes.
All right.
What you got, girl?
So we're going to talk about what it's like or what it might be like or would you after
living alone for so long live with a partner again?
I think about this a lot, actually.
And I just it's very hard because and I've lived with other people before and I've had
roommates.
So, you know, going from first of all, going from a roommate to no roommate and then trying
to have a roommate again.
Right.
And in general, a roommate, you can't really like get mad like in a relationship and break
up with your roommate.
I mean, you can, but like you don't want to.
So it's different for a roommate and like a like a partner or like a boyfriend, girlfriend,
that type of thing.
But like it's still a roommate and you have to get used to their quirks and those things.
And so and then like, what if they have another animal?
I have four animals, three dogs and a cat.
And if they have another animal, that would be freaking crazy.
Also, whose house would we move to?
And my thing, I'm very selfish because I love my place, but I do I do want a bigger place.
But like, I don't want to get rid of my place because I love it so much.
And I just got it.
Yeah.
But it would be nice if it was like a bedroom or two more.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
And like some more storage or whatever.
I don't know.
For me, it's been really easy.
I've lived in the same place for the last like nine and a half years and it's a one bedroom
apartment and I have a hard no that nobody is moving into that apartment.
But I'm also moving out of it into a two bedroom.
But I'm not about to invite somebody else into that small space.
But would you move into somebody else's?
I think it depends on what like where they're living.
So I feel like it.
So this is me from the outside to another knowing you and only knowing you as best I
can.
Yeah.
I feel like you would succeed most if they moved in with you.
One hundred percent.
You would be like, hell no.
This is how I live and you need to come into my world and not like, oh no, I'm coming into
your world.
If you went into their world, you'd be like, uh, what am I supposed to do?
I mean, I think that's fair.
I want to give myself a little credit and say that I would absolutely compromise if
they came and lived in my space.
Like I'm not about to be like, oh, in your space, not in their space.
What about you living in their space?
So I don't think I would do it.
I think you're right about that.
I'm pretty right.
Yeah, I'm right.
I mean, I think that's fair, but I do think that I, I don't think that I would be territorial
enough, excuse me, to.
To be like, it's my way or the highway.
No, I wouldn't.
Well, not my way over the highway, but you would be, I think that you would be like the
wear in the pants.
I don't think, no, I don't feel comfortable saying that, that I would wear the pants.
I think in 10 years ago, absolutely.
I wanted to wear the pants.
Oh, 10 years ago, I was not wearing any pants.
I still don't want like, I didn't listen.
I didn't wear pants until you got here today.
I didn't wear any pants.
I worked like, I wore a tank top and panties all day today.
When I took the dogs out, I put a robe on.
You don't like to let me say that I'm bossy.
Like you try to not let me say that about myself.
Because I don't want you to, I don't want, because thoughts becomes words and words become
actions.
I don't want you to continue to think that you're bossy and then you continue to be bossy
if you don't want to be.
No.
And I have come a long way from being bossy and being a my way or the highway kind of
person.
And I was that way in my relationship back in the day and with my friends.
And I have figured out that I cannot be that way.
I have to be more conducive to the way that other people do things.
And I'm okay with that now.
You're still a little bit like that.
But I see it with me, like with me a lot.
Because we haven't known each other as long as some other people that we know.
And I feel like I know you, the newer you.
You know what I mean?
Yes.
I totally agree with you.
I think that's completely fair.
I mean, I've definitely learned how to compromise and I've definitely learned how to pick my
battles.
And I think that I am not going to put myself in that kind of situation of living together.
I did that a long time ago.
And I think I did it because I thought that it was like the next step in the relationship
and this was the way that it had to be.
And I don't feel that way anymore.
I don't think that I would live with anybody again without a commitment more so than we're
exclusively dating.
I see that.
And I agree with that.
I played the wife and the partner and whatever and I didn't get anything out of it.
I mean, it was an okay relationship, but I eventually found it necessary to leave and
I don't want to do that with the next person.
I agree with that.
I mean, I think that's great.
I think that's good.
And I think that's good that you found that out.
Well, I'll say this much.
My stepmom can give a big fat.
I told you so because when I wanted to move in with that person, she was like, Sarah,
you haven't even lived by yourself outside of the three semesters that I spent at SUNY
Cortland when I first went to college.
And she was like, you have no idea what it's like to live by yourself.
You need to figure that out first.
And I was like, I'm going to do this though.
And I did it and it didn't work out.
And now I feel the way that she, you know, predicted I would feel, which is I'm going
to do that with the next person when I'm in a committed relationship beyond we're exclusively
dating one another.
Yeah.
And I feel that kind of pain a little bit because so I was just graduating or like about
to graduate from undergrad and my rent was so expensive for me at that point.
Yeah.
And I had not found a job yet.
Like I was making $10 an hour working at a restaurant and like a fast casual restaurant
working like eight to five.
And then I did end up finding a job at like a sports medicine clinic.
And but I was still making like probably 10, $12 an hour at that point.
And I couldn't afford like I only could afford my apartment with my loans.
And so I had to tell my roommate, I was like, Hey, I can't afford it.
Cause my mom was like, you don't have student loans anymore, you're going to have to pay
for this.
And I couldn't afford it.
So I had to tell my roommate and I feel really bad because she had to get another, I had
to like sublease my place out and like she had to find a roommate and I think she hated
the girl and I feel, I feel like we kind of like our relationship kind of went downhill
from there.
But I mean, there was nothing I could do.
So at that point I was dating this guy and I moved in with him and he had a house and
his parents owned it and the rent was like $300 a month or something.
Why?
Like it was amazing.
Yeah.
And I mean, like I couldn't turn that down.
And so we, I had my own bedroom with all my furniture and I moved all my stuff in, but
you know, we were dating.
So like we, we shared a whole bedroom or whatever, but we ended up breaking up at one point.
I mean, it was a while after that, but, and I don't know how long it may have been a year,
may have been two years.
I don't know how long when we broke up and I was like, Oh my God, I need to move out
because he was like the next day bringing girls over.
Yeah.
Yes.
Like I was in my bedroom and he would have like girls over in his, in his room and I
could like hear them having sex.
Yeah.
That's hateful.
Yep.
Yeah.
And so I would sit out in the living room or in the kitchen in the dining room the next
morning and wait for the, excuse my language to go home.
And I'd be like, Hey, how's it going?
Like what the hell are you doing here?
But, um, but yeah, it was, it was really awkward.
And when I moved, I did that because of the money thing and my mom and dad, I don't remember
them saying much about it, but I do remember my little brother, Daniel, he was so upset
and he was like, you're not supposed to live with anybody before you get married.
And he went on this whole thing about it.
And Daniel, I'm going to tell you right now.
How do you feel?
How you feel now?
How you feel about it now?
I was going to say that.
I was pretty much, I mean, he has his own house.
He's selling it.
So, but yeah, so sorry, Daniel, I'm sorry.
I broke your heart.
He's probably like, well, it was you.
I'm sorry, Daniel, that I broke your heart about that.
But you know, I was poor.
Like I've been like, couldn't afford it.
And I didn't know where to live and rent's expensive.
I didn't want to have to move home.
That's that's my whole thing.
I totally get it.
I was living with a roommate that I met through Jessica and it did not go well.
We did like a seven month lease and it went well for the first seven months.
And then very quickly after we resigned for another 14 months, it went very downhill and
I decided that I was going to move out and I was adamant about it.
And I just said, you can either leave me on this lease and I will not pay a dime.
And if you can't afford it by yourself, then our credit, both of our credit will go to
shit or you can sign a roommate relinquish agreement and let me out of this lease.
And she signed it and I went and found the apartment that I'm still living in today because
it was what I could afford on like a $30,000 salary at the time.
And I've been there ever since and now I'm moving on up to a two bedroom.
Well, I'm just going to tell you right now that I would never move in with you because
you would hate me and we would not be friends ever again.
See, but unless it was me, I would probably be like, Sarah.
But like if you were like, why do you think that I just feel like you would be like mad
at me all the time.
But why?
I don't know because you're you're just the you're Sarah.
I think that like I would never like I don't think that like I just wouldn't want to live
with you.
Melanie says the same thing.
Y'all are breaking my heart.
I just think that you are I don't know if the word is stubborn or oh, I am that for
sure.
Or if it's like stubborn is more more than selfish, I guess, because you're not selfish.
You like are very giving and like you do things for everybody else.
But like maybe a little bit like.
I like things a particular a little bit.
But I am the same way.
But like also, I am not that it's not about to ruin your day, though.
Like it ruined my day.
Yeah.
See, I'm like, oh, whatever.
I was like anxiety and it was why we need Lexapro for all all peeps.
But look, I wasn't like that before.
But like Lexapro saved my life peeps.
Look, honestly, I haven't even I haven't even taken it that long.
But I know the difference.
Like there's a difference.
But but we still had a difference before I took it.
So but yeah, no, I don't I don't know.
I wouldn't want to live with you, but I also wouldn't want to live with a lot of other
people like no, I understand that.
And I I think you wouldn't want to live with me either.
So sorry, I didn't mean it interrupts you, but you wouldn't.
You'd be like, no, we can have two separate wings of a house and come.
Oh, look, if we had that, that would be freaking fun.
For sure.
I want all of our friends to have like like a compound.
Yeah, about it for so long.
We could be like like the what's that movie?
We're like, is it Sandra Bullock or is it?
It's one.
It's Jennifer Aniston and somebody and they go out to.
Yeah, I wonder less.
I love that movie and they go out there and like, I don't want to.
But we're not going to do that.
But like we're just we're not going to like have one person that has sex with everyone.
But except for me, just kidding.
Because I don't ever.
I know.
But listen, I don't have sex with anybody.
So I'm just saying it's true.
It's the truth.
OK, we'll just clear that up.
I'm just trying to say no, I totally get it.
It's probably the same with that guy.
He never had sex with anybody.
So he was like, I'm going to make a commune and so and tell everybody that I have to have
sex with their wives.
So after old dude that you lived with and broke up with, I don't know how long ago that
was or whatever.
But have you ever created a Finsta fake Instagram account?
No, no, because Instagram, honestly, like that was a long time ago.
I don't think Instagram was around at that point.
If it was, it wasn't.
Have you ever created one, though, since anybody you've ever dated or wherever to like stalk
them or somebody else?
No, but I will tell you a story about this one guy.
And it may be the same guy we're talking about, but it may not be.
So I don't know how, but me and my friend, one of my friends decided that he was doing
something bad and we created a fake.
I forgot what it's called.
It's called a shoot.
It's like a porn site, but for real people, it's called it's not it's not Madison.
It's not the Holly Madison.
Ashley Madison.
No, it's not Ashley Madison.
It's the other one I hang on.
Okay, so it's called adult friend finder dot com or something like that.
And honestly, I can't it's been so long.
It's been like over 10 years.
I think that this happened and I don't know how we figured out that he was on there.
So we found out that he or I did or I don't know if we both did found out that he had
an account and one day I got on there and he was on.
Is this your boyfriend?
This was my boyfriend.
Holy shit.
Okay.
And I get on there and I'm going to tell you I'm going to tell you the truth that you're
going to judge me after this.
Okay.
Yes, you will.
You're going to freaking judge me.
Okay, so I got on there and I talked to him and I because I had this fake profile and
I had like whatever picture I put on there and then we got on the webcam and he showed
himself jacking himself off and I got on there and I was like, what the hell, dude, did you
put your face on there and you were like, sir, I don't know.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I was like, what the hell?
Seriously, what are you doing?
Like, is this for real?
And this was back when like this was not like a like it was like internet was that much
of a thing I would judge you about?
No, it's because I'm pretty sure we stayed together after that for a little bit.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure.
I'm pretty sure we stayed together after that and but you know, whatever.
And I got what I got what I was served.
Is this the same guy from Christmas accident?
Yep.
Also the same guy I live with.
Oh, we had a lot of things.
We went through a lot together, honestly, though, like and there were some other things
that happen that you don't know about, like that kept us together.
So lessons learned, lessons learned.
I ended up seeing him at like a recently.
I haven't seen him in a long time.
I was with Rose and DJ.
It was like this year, I think.
I live in Birmingham.
Yeah, I think he lives in the same house.
I think his sister lives there.
Maybe now.
I don't know if she's moved out or not.
But I saw him and he had like I didn't recognize him.
He had a ponytail.
Wait, a ponytail?
Yeah, he had a ponytail.
It's like, well, maybe it was like a half.
It was like half up half down.
OK, my dad just got his haircut.
Oh, yeah.
And he is so proud of his haircut, his long hair, the whole thing.
He had not had his haircut since October of 2019 and he got it cut in October of this
year.
So three years he let his hair grow and he donated like I'm going to go.
Listen, don't hold me to it.
Either 17, somewhere between 17 and 22 inches of hair to Wigs for Kids.
Wigs for Kids.
I didn't know that was the thing.
I thought it was locks of love.
Yes, I don't know.
I don't know what made him make that choice, but he looks younger and handsome.
I mean, he's always handsome, my dad, but like he looks so good with his haircut.
It was long and scraggly before.
I saw pictures of it.
I didn't think it looked scraggly.
I thought it looked like really like straight and nice.
Well, yeah, his hair is a little curly.
Is it?
He used to keep it in a ponytail and when it was like in the in between stage and he
wore it down.
Between stage?
Yeah, between stage and he wore it down.
We told him one time that he looked like the undertaker and he was not happy.
Oh, poor guy.
You got that long hair.
He's like, yeah.
I tried to tell him before he went, he went and got his haircut by the same girl, Shelly,
who does my stepmom's hair and my hair.
We tried to tell him, I was like, go to the mail room.
I was like, they do like a hot towel on your face with like essential oils.
He was like, I don't want none of that.
Oh my God.
I want to go to the mail room and like they don't do this.
The stuff that they do with these men barber shops.
Yeah, they don't do it.
It's like they have like a bunch of women working there.
They're like in Hooters uniforms basically and they like massage you and give you a happy
ending essentially.
I do not think that is correct information.
I wish that that's how it works.
Our place we go and we talk and I'm like, can I just go and like, can I have a man cut
my hair?
That's not gay.
Do you know what I've seen on TikTok lately?
You can ask for a silent appointment.
Like if we're like working women or moms or something like that, that just like that's
their time away from either their job or their family or whatever they can go in and they
can ask for a silent appointment because that is just their do they put them in a room by
themselves?
No, but their stylist just doesn't talk to them.
What about the other people in the room?
Well, I mean, I hear all their conversations and then I start talking or like what if you
have a silent appointment and then you start talking?
Well that's because neither one of us have a problem having a conversation with a stranger.
Oh my God.
I know, but sometimes I don't want to have conversation and then I feel bad.
And I'm like, I want to be here and be quiet and it's I'm sure they're okay with it, but
I'm like, I feel bad not talking to them.
That's because you're the ultimate people pleaser.
Not really.
When it comes to feeling bad about talking to strangers.
Yeah, I'd call that people pleasing.
I don't feel bad about talking to strangers, but my hair stylist that does my hair every
time.
Yeah.
Why do you feel bad?
Do you?
You're paying for your time.
Would you not feel bad going to Shelly and not saying a word to her?
No, because me and Shelly are friends.
Exactly.
That I'm friends with my hair stylist.
But I don't need that.
If I needed that, Shelly would give it to me.
Okay.
That sounds like a good plan.
I mean, it's something to think about.
Yeah.
Something to give our listeners to think about.
Yeah.
If they want, if they've never heard of a silent appointment.
Think about it guys.
I need silent appointments.
Sometimes I need silent friend appointments.
Be here, but don't be here.
Listen, I had the same thing that I needed this weekend after I'd been out at my parents'
house.
Brandon and I got back to my house and he was like, all right, you take a shower.
Then I'll take a shower.
Then we'll go around our errands or whatever.
I needed to go to Home Goods and get shower bathroom stuff essentially for my guest bathroom
because I forgot now I have two bathrooms.
I was like, I can't go any, I need to sit down and just be quiet for a little while.
We sat down in the living room and he left me alone.
Twenty minutes later, I was like, okay, would you like to watch a movie or something for
right now?
I'm still not ready to get up and get moving.
Yeah.
I mean, that's awesome.
I think that's great that you guys have that because in the beginning of a relationship,
it's like, go, go, go, go, go.
Let's make everybody, let's just try to entertain the other person and let's be like, I don't
want to lose your interest.
Sometimes it's exhausting and it's like, oh my God, you're always here and I need my alone
time and you definitely need your alone time.
Even though she doesn't want her alone time, she doesn't ever want to be alone.
She wants something, but she needs her alone time.
You know what I mean?
Or silent time too.
She wants somebody to be there with your hand on her back, making sure you're there just
in case, but don't say a word and don't do anything.
Don't make any movements.
I mean, that was one of my favorite things about my friendship with Melanie when we were,
we are still best friends, but when we were neighbors, when we got together, it didn't
matter if I was at her house or she was at my house or whatever, but the majority of
the time our routine when we spent time together was watching, playing Jeopardy.
We would record Jeopardy and play old episodes of Jeopardy and we were terrible, but it was
fun.
Don't do it out loud.
Yes, absolutely.
And answer the question.
Dumb answers count for something.
But yeah, we would play Jeopardy and then we would just sit there on our phones sometimes
and not talk to each other.
We would let a show or a movie or something just play and we wouldn't talk to each other,
but we were still spending quality time together and we wanted to say something, we would say
it.
So hold on, hold on, hold on.
Go back to the Jeopardy thing.
You said dumb answers count.
You gave points for dumb answers?
No, no, no points for dumb answers.
Are you sure?
But there was no judgment for a dumb answer.
Oh, oh, oh.
Yeah.
Oh, good.
Yeah.
So that's the best way to do it.
Like if you don't have an answer, like you should have an answer even if you don't know
it.
Like if you're just like, I don't know, purple.
Like purple.
What is purple?
Yeah.
We didn't even make, we didn't even make each other say what is.
See, that's good.
Yeah.
That's nice.
You shout the answer.
Because you will lose if you don't do it.
Oh, I was the biggest loser of all because Melanie is really smart.
Yeah, she is pretty smart.
And with like literature and history and stuff.
Yes.
Screw you Melanie.
You're pretty and smart and like we don't, we love you, but we don't want to.
She's going to be.
You're hard to love because you're so smart and pretty.
True that.
And you have cute glasses.
The cutest glasses.
She's going to be a guest here soon.
Yeah.
What day?
Soon.
This month maybe.
The week before Christmas should be.
Yeah.
Christmas week.
We'll see.
Yeah.
All right.
So, so back to like relationships and all that stuff and like, you know, living with
somebody and, you know, figuring out that it wasn't right for you.
What do you think some, were there any red flags for you?
What type of relationship red flags did you have?
I would say as far as like living with somebody, the one person that I did live with and when
it was coming to an end, our relationship red flag was like not having meals together
anymore.
Like when we started doing our own separate thing for dinner, watching our own separate
shows in separate rooms, like we became roommates instead of partners.
So that's not a red flag.
That's like the end of your relationship.
So do you know of anything like that started up front that like, you know?
Yeah.
When I found some girl's tits on his phone in the beginning, I'm still stuck around.
Oh yeah.
100%.
Like what else?
Like, and what about other guys?
Any other guys?
Like big red flags.
Yeah.
I would say having like a relationship and an ex that still calls you and like bitches
at you about things that happened in your relationship.
Why are you talking to her?
You're dating me.
I don't understand that.
It doesn't make sense.
If you're not over it, then figure it out with her.
If you're over it, then quit answering her damn phone calls and text messages.
Well, did they have a good response for that?
Because I feel like we have some friends that have some situation like that where they feel
that same way, but there are relationships that may or may not.
They made it be a little different.
I mean, the response was basically also a red flag.
I did her dirty and I'm just trying to be nice to her now.
Oh yeah.
Sarah, where was I during this to tell you, hell no, H2O.
Girl, you are no.
What?
Yeah.
That is bad, Sarah.
That makes me really upset.
But listen, I've had the same type of stuff.
Listen, I don't want to be in that relationship anymore, so I'm glad it happened.
You're not going to be good old Brandon.
At least it's not named Brendan.
We're just going to say his name is Brandon and not Brendan.
Do you have any other red flags?
I'm going to think of one.
Maybe that they went to jail would be a red flag.
No, excuse me, prison.
Red flag, excuse me.
It wasn't jail, it was prison.
When their exes have blocked them on social media.
Oh Lord.
Oh wait, when their ex is still living in their house and they had to move out, but
they didn't really move out.
They're living in the basement.
And wait, what?
Wait.
It was a whole thing.
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
Hold on.
I'm sorry.
Is this information that is new to me right now?
No, it's not new, but it was technically like all the stuff was moved to the basement,
but then he was like living at, I think technically my house.
So bad.
That relationship was basically not quite over that.
Or like at the lake house where he, yeah, like, I don't know what the deal was, but
yeah, who knows?
How about if they have five different children from three different baby mamas?
One of the baby mamas ended up, nevermind, we won't talk about that.
Yeah, that's a red flag.
No, I'm waiting.
You want to hold the whole story?
One of the baby mamas sent me, and I won't get into it, but she sent my-
Is this the same person?
No.
No, no, no, different person.
Okay, that's what I thought.
No, different person.
So I thought we were going through all the peeps.
No, we are.
Yeah.
Or just like throwing them out there.
Yeah, yeah.
So he, one guy, he was a really nice dude.
He had like all these babies from lots of baby mamas.
And one of his baby mamas, his last recent baby mama sent me, well, so excuse me, hold
on.
One day I get a phone call from one of my really close friends, Mariella, I love you.
And she's like, hey, Emily, you need to check your Facebook because this girl sent me a
text or a message because she knows the girl, Mariella knows this guy that I was dating
because we hung out together.
And she's like, you need to check your message because this girl sent me a message saying,
hey, can you please tell Emily to check her messages on Facebook?
Because you know how on Facebook, if you-
You don't-
You don't have to check my Facebook, but second, if you don't get, if you don't, aren't friends
with the person, you get like a follow request or whatever.
Yeah.
And it's like, yeah, so it was way over there.
So I can get that out and read it to you.
It was basically telling you, me, I'm not going to read it.
Should I read it?
You can read it if you want.
Okay, hold on.
Okay.
So she sent me this message that says, hey, exclamation point, not creeping, just wanted
to make sure we are both sleeping with.
She says no and that you were a one-time thing, but I just wanted to make sure.
I don't want to continue having a sexual relationship with him if you or any of the other women
are as well.
I hope you understand and don't think this is a weird message.
It's happened before and I really don't want to fall for it again.
Thank you.
There's some things in here.
It looks like there might've been an emoji, but they were replaced with a square with
a question mark inside.
Oh, yeah.
And it says, please, I can't have him break my heart again, dot, dot, dot.
I won't say anything or that I messaged you.
I just need to know if he's telling me the truth.
And then she sent me another one and said, definitely meant to say, just wanted to make
sure we both are not.
And also this was all at like, this isn't 2016, by the way.
It was 2016, so it was six years ago.
Oh my God.
August 15th, 2016 at 5 0 7 a.m. and then 3 30.
Yeah, 3 36.
Well, she has like a hundred fucking kids.
Are they his kids?
Some of them are two of them are.
He is like twins with her.
But apparently, I don't know.
Did you reply?
Hell no.
I didn't even.
Is she still in my message requests?
Like, no, I do.
I really liked him and I thought he was a good guy.
But that to me is a red.
That's a red flag.
Oh, and I immediately I told I didn't tell him that.
And I feel bad doing this now on the Internet.
But like, I didn't tell him that that happened because I didn't want to cause drama between
him because that's his child's mother or his children's mother.
Like, you know, like and I just said, I just told him, hey, it's not going to work out
between us.
Let them deal with it.
And I'm sorry.
Why do you feel bad?
I don't feel bad for not telling him he was messing around on his baby mama.
He was not messing around on his baby mama.
They were not together.
So what do you think?
You think I should have said something to her?
No, I'm not saying you should have responded to her at all.
What you said to start this, you know, whole last couple seconds of this conversation was
you feel bad that you're saying this right now on the podcast as opposed to giving him
any sort of explanation.
The reason that I feel bad is because he has children with this girl, this woman, and I
don't want her their children to hear this.
That's that.
And because I don't want their relationship to suffer like if they have a mother father
child relationship, I don't want their children because like if you heard this from your parent
about your parents, I can understand that.
I mean, you don't have to say his name.
Nobody has said any names, but like you never know because people know who I am.
I mean, and those people know who I am.
I understand what you're saying.
I misinterpreted what you said about the feel bad.
I thought you meant you felt bad that you were saying the reason why for the first time
right now.
What do you mean the reason why?
You said you didn't give him a reason.
All you said was it's not going to work out.
I thought you meant that you felt bad because you're saying the reason for the very first
time right now.
I mean, that's the reason, but all I told him was like it's not going to work out between
us.
And that's all that really mattered at that point.
And it's because I didn't want to mess up anything between him and his baby mama.
And it's different when you have children with somebody and I don't know what their
relationship is.
But all I know is that I don't want to be in between all that.
I totally agree.
And it doesn't matter if I were to get in between it.
It doesn't matter.
It's not going to change anything.
Usually if I were to say something and get in a fight with them or him or her or try
to get in between it, it's just going to turn out crappy.
It's not going to be good.
No, I don't think you mishandled it in any capacity.
Yeah.
I just, you know, that's what I felt like was the best situation at the time.
I think you handled it correctly.
And he ended up actually, I think, and I don't know if I haven't seen him in a while, but
I think he ended up dating some other girl somewhere else for a little bit.
And then I'm pretty sure he's back with that, with his ex, the baby mama girl that sent
me the messages.
Well, sounds like it all worked out.
Yeah.
Worked out the way I needed to.
So I wish you guys luck.
You're a great guy.
No, onto the next for you.
A, B, C, D, E, F, D. Yes, for sure.
100%.
Onto the next for you though.
Onto the next.
Yeah.
Gotta get on that map, girl.
Honey.
I know you don't want to put the time and effort into it and I have totally been there
and I, I, I absolutely get it.
Will you swipe for me?
Like if I give you my account, will you just do it for me and like set up my dates?
Oh my God.
I would love it so much.
But they would probably, the thing is that they would, they would want to talk to you
and it wouldn't be me.
Stop it.
And they'd be like, this isn't the right person.
I'd be like.
We have the same sense of humor.
Sort of, but not really.
We're different in certain, in a lot of ways, but we're all so similar.
I don't know.
We can think on it for you.
I wish that you could hire, I could hire somebody to do that for me though.
You probably could.
Let's get on the good ones.
Yeah, but it's probably expensive as hell and I'm not rich.
So all our money is going into the podcast.
Yeah.
I would like to be rich.
Please let me be rich one day or, you know, honestly, I would like to make my own money,
but I wouldn't hate it if I had a sponsor for life.
And by life sponsor, she means sugar daddy.
She doesn't have sex with you.
No, I will.
If you're, if we have sexual compatibility and it's like one of those things and we're
like married and things like that, then yes.
Also, I would like to have a, if you're married to them.
Yes, they are.
No, they're still like sponsor.
If you don't have a job and like they're paying for you.
Yeah.
It's not a life sponsor.
You're married.
They're your partner.
It's still a sponsor.
No, I'm sorry.
But when you're married, the people will just say that it's just like literally like a person,
like adopting a child, same as a wife.
Stop it.
You're wild.
I can't with that.
Oh no, I'm just, I do not co-sign.
Oh, okay.
But I don't know why, why is it that like, you know, I can't like expand my circle to
like a better circle of like money wise, like I need my circle to go up and expand.
I'm so glad my circle started where it is because if you were like really poor.
Do you really want to be a socialite of Birmingham or something?
Hell yes.
No, God no.
That would be so fun.
Absolutely not.
Oh my God.
I feel like the socialites of Birmingham are going to like fancy dinners and then.
Who the hell are they anyways?
And then to Innisfree.
Orlando?
No, he's not a socialite.
But I love you.
I love Orlando too.
I feel like that's who you were referring to.
Because we call them, they're like all beautiful.
Who the hell are the socialites of Birmingham?
I don't even know.
It was just a reference.
I was like, are there any?
I don't even know who they are.
Like, no, you don't want to do that anyways.
We literally like to wear athleisure and do exactly what we're doing right now.
Yeah, but so do the socialites.
They like to wear athleisure.
But more expensive and better quality and feels better.
And they probably wear a new outfit every day.
I just did like vocal fry.
Have you ever done that before?
No, are you done?
No.
Are you done?
Yeah.
I'm going to keep going.
Vocal fry is the worst.
I hope I don't do it.
Do I do vocal fry?
No, you sing a lot during our episodes.
Oh, I'm so excited.
Why don't you go ahead and sing your favorite karaoke song?
Oh, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
All right.
So now that we have talked about red flags, why don't you tell me what you're looking
for in your next relationship?
Do you really think that I'm looking for our next relationship?
Why don't you tell me?
Well, you've got one, but like, dang it.
It's on you.
Why does it have to be?
So I don't know because I'm not really looking for a next relationship.
I think that's okay.
But like if someone were to come along, what are the qualities that you're looking for
in a partner?
Somebody that's easy to get along with.
Easy.
It's easy.
Everything's easy.
I don't have to work.
I mean, I do want to work.
I mean, I know I get it that relationships are work, but like I want it to be as easy
as possible and I don't want it to be fights all the time.
I don't want us to be things that you consider to be easy about a relationship.
I mean, like how I get along with other people, I feel like I feel like I'm easy going.
I probably piss people off sometimes, but like, I don't know.
I want it to be easy, like fun, like us to get along and them to be like wanting to do
the same things I want to do and like us.
Which are?
Oh, well, you know, like go to Dave Matthews band concerts.
Just kidding.
That's not it.
Drink beer at the bar, drink wine.
I also like to go to, I like plants.
I like, I have three dogs and a cat.
I would prefer, I don't mind if the other person has a dog, but sometimes I look at
and I think about like if the other person has a big dog and you know, cricket doesn't
really like, but like it would be fine if they got used to each other, but I would have
preferred and maybe either no dogs and they want dogs or like somebody that has like a
small dog.
Maybe that doesn't, that's not a, that's not a deal breaker.
Yeah.
That's not, there's no deal breakers really at this point, except for like, there are
some do, honestly, at this point, there's no deal breakers.
There are deal breakers, or some other thing.
Like there's a, yeah, there's a lot of things that are deal breakers, but they're not like
that type of deal breaker.
You know what I mean?
Like it's like a given deal breaker.
So that, and like, I want them to understand that I work from home and although I work
from home, I, it's not just because I work from home does not mean that I can do things
for them.
I can like go run errands during the day and like, I actually have to do my job when I'm
at home.
Like there's a lot of people that think, oh, you work from home so you can go, you can
take care of my kid.
Like, no, I can't.
No, that is not a thing.
Like I'm sorry, I have a job and I have to do it.
Things like that.
I don't know.
I would, I would like the person to be smart, like intelligent.
Hopefully.
Can carry a conversation with you.
Can have the hard conversations with you.
Doesn't get offended when I say things that I say.
Non-reactive.
Well, they should react a little bit, but like not offended.
Yeah, but not in a negative way.
Yeah, and they shouldn't like get their, I don't know.
Yeah.
Like I am sometimes I say, I say what's on my mind and I just like speak a lot and I
know my boss like tells me he's like, you just like have a, you're a direct communicator
or something like that.
And I'm like, Oh God, I don't know if that's good.
I mean, I feel like I'm a direct communicator.
You are like, I don't know how you are with your job, but you are 100% a direct communicator.
You are a whoa, holy crap.
Like you are going to tell people what you, yeah.
But I think there's a way to be tactful about it and there's nothing wrong with that.
I agree.
I am like that, but I think that within my like personal life, I've tried to be better
about and, and with my working life, I've tried to be much better about not being a
unit of BITCH, I guess.
Anyways, guys, that's all the time that we have for today.
Thank you so much for being here.
We had a great time.
You know, you can find us anywhere.
You get your podcasts, you know, give us a little like and a follow.
You know, if you like us, if not like us anyways, you can also send us an email at thick AF
podcast at gmail.com.
You want to send us any comments or tell us what you think we should talk about any ideas,
suggestions, things like that.
Thanks again, guys.
See you next time.
ABCDEFG, I have to go.