Hello. Hi. What are we talking about today? We're not talking about Cults are we? No.
Oh my god. Thank goodness because I'm not prepared for that. I know. I've been stuck
on this Carly Russell stuff like all week and I've been so excited. We're going to record
a Polz episode. I keep putting in the Polz. People do keep voting for it, but it's not
getting the most votes. But we do need to do major prep work for that before we can
talk about it. So it's coming. I just don't know when, but today we're going to talk about
things that you should know when you're 30s, but maybe you don't or things that you should
start thinking about and doing when you're in your 30s or things that you didn't think
about when you were in your 20s and now you have no choice but to think about now that
we're in our 30s. Or just things that like our parents should have taught us or like
high school should have taught us to do so that we can be good adults. Successful humans.
Maybe we've done them or maybe we haven't, but the things that we've learned. Before
we dig in, something funny happened right before we started to record. You tell me what
you did and I'll tell you what my reaction was because I'll tell you why it was anyways.
We're posting. So we were posting an episode and I looked at it and I was like, oh yeah,
by the way, I was like, I was looking on the thing and I was like, oh yeah, by the way,
I changed the logo to a different color. It's the same logo, but it has a different background.
It's got a white background. And I was like, oh yeah, I changed the logo on the posting
this week. I was testing it out to see what it looked like and I forgot to tell you about
it because I actually, honestly forgot that I put it on there. I had it in there and then
I forgot. But then-
The best part about it was, is I was wondering on my way over here because I was listening
to today's episode on my way and I was like, finally I had like closed and locked my phone
or whatever. So it gives you that preview of whatever's playing on your phone because
it was playing in my car. And I was like, what the fuck is this thing white for? And
then I was like, that's weird. I swear to God, I only changed my home computer stuff
to dark mode. And I was thinking, did everything just go into dark mode after what I did today?
Because I changed my browser, my Outlook, my OneNote. My team was already in dark mode,
but then I was like, how did this affect my phone? I was thinking that I was putting whatever,
I think I was listening on Spotify, that it turned the logo white because it was in dark
mode. That is not what happened. Emily just did it.
I just, yeah, I did it. I kind of thought it was cute, but like-
Oh, I don't think it's bad. No. It just threw me for a loop.
And I forgot about it and I'm like, oh shoot. But yeah, anyway, so there's a white logo
out there. It's just for the episode, not for like all the things. But you know, throwing
out some different logos there.
Yeah. We got to keep you all on your toes because Emily's keeping me on mine for sure.
All right. Let's jump. Oh, do you have fuck, marry, kill? Because I can think of one.
Go ahead. Okay.
I was thinking about it on the way over here and then I was like, I just, I don't know.
Firefighter, police officer, or an EMT?
You are, I am so fucking dead right now. I was literally going to say the same thing
and I was like, no, that's too close to home right now.
That's perfect.
I didn't have a third one, but I did have firefighter and police. And I was like, oh
my God. Okay. This is perfect. We have ESP tonight. Okay. I am going to marry an EMT
because oftentimes they're also firefighters and then they can, you know, hopefully save
my life or at least give me the Heimlich maneuver. You have no idea how many times-
You say all three can do those things. Well, I don't know. Well, anyways, but they can
also run a line if I need some fluids or something, you know, I'm just, just saying.
I got you.
Yeah. A save your life kind of dude, but this is hilarious. And then I think I'm going
to kill the police officer and I hate to say that, but like they get a bad rap across the
board and like, I just, that's all I'm going to say is they get a bad rap. So I'm going
to kill them and I'm going to fuck a firefighter and hopefully he's wearing them pants when
I do it.
Well, okay. So that's about par for the course for firefighters because they have a reputation
for being hoes in my opinion, at least. So, and I think that police officers have a bad
rap and I'm like kind of torn about this, but like I honestly, if, if it wasn't for,
for them getting a bad reputation because of all the stuff that's happened with police
officers or whatnot, I would, I'm going to marry the police officer because I'm pretty
sure the police officers make more money.
EMTs make like no money. And I'm like, okay, you're gonna have to have like 10 jobs to
be able to do, you know, whatever you're doing. Also, EMTs are usually younger. I think actually
maybe they're not, I don't know. And then I'm going to, what does that say? Marry the
police officer, kill the firefighter. Well, no, I'm not. I'm going to fuck the firefighter
because they like to fuck, you know what I mean? And I'm going to kill the EMT, even
though I do really like the EMT, but you know, sorry, you don't make enough money for me.
That's terrible. That's a terrible thing for me to judge them on. But also police officers
can like get you out of a ticket and EMT can't and a firefighter usually knows like basic
CPR. And I have like medical people in my family and I can like probably do all those
things that you want it. Like I can do like all that. So I don't need it.
Fair enough. Fair enough. All right. So I, so I can just start at it if we want. Just
go into it. Okay. You should start saving. And I think you should start saving before
you're in your thirties. You shouldn't start saving. Listen, it's very hard to save, especially
when you're not making money when you're in college and you don't like maybe you first
starting out, you don't have a good job. And it's like, I feel like I've been like catching
up my whole life. Like I like don't have good savings. Like I need to get more savings.
And then like as soon as I get the savings, then I'm like, okay, I'm going to buy a house
and use all my savings from my down payment. And then it's like, grab, I got to start over.
But like that and like saving for retirement is like a really big deal. Yeah. And nobody
really, I mean, they, some people do tell you, but like, it's not like really stressed
a lot. No. And I mean, whenever a company hires you, it's not their job to teach you,
you know, how to save for retirement. They give you what, whatever their benefits and
options are and you just pick something. We should be telling people to save for retirement
because you, we can't have everybody working when they're retired. Have you seen the new
things on the news where the old, the old people, oh my God, the senior citizens, like
90 years old people are like, uh, life cards they're getting, cause they can't get hired
anywhere else. And I saw this one lady, she was on, I don't know which channel it was,
but she was on there and she was like, yeah, I tried to get a job at McDonald's and they
told me and I'm like, dang, they're gonna get a lawsuit from this. They told me that
they couldn't hire her cause she was 90 years old, but she didn't say it like in a bad way.
She just said, yeah, they just said no. And maybe they didn't say those words. Well, that's
something, it would definitely be something that they could bring to the EEOC if they
had said you're too old. Right. Exactly. But so she is a lifeguard at like a splash pad
now. I can't, I think it's cool, but like, you know, sometimes you need to have a job
when you're old. Yeah. Absolutely. Um, especially if you don't save your health becomes considerably
more important. Well, your health is always important. Sure. But you don't bounce back
from things as easily when you're older. Yeah. So you should not get, not eat Cheetos and
go to third meal. I mean, fourth meal at Taco Bell every night when you're in your twenties
don't drink like the, don't drink like a bunch of like white Russians and like creamy drinks
and sugary drinks when you're younger, only drink vodka soda so that you stay skinny so
that you don't get fat. And cause you will not be able to lose it. Yes. That's the truth.
Because it's really bad for your health. Your ass will drop. Apparently. Okay. So according
to whatever lists Sarah got, it says that your ass will drop. And I sent her my, what
did I say? I said, honey, for the record, our asses have not dropped and they bang on
to, I'm pretty sure they've gotten bigger. Mine will never drop. My mom's is still up
there. My mom doesn't have one. No offense, Donnie, but, um, you'll gain speaking of,
you'll gain new respect for your parents. You're going to say you'll gain weight. No,
you'll gain a new respect for your parents. Yeah. Especially after you have kids, even
though we don't have kids, but like I see like how it is for other people with kids
and I'm like, dang, I see. I mean, I already see my parents differently than I used to.
And you know, I definitely respect them and their opinion and I involve them and stuff
that, you know, I didn't as like a teenager think that I would involve them in, you know?
Yeah. Well, I respect, there's a, I respect my parents more, but then there's also things
that I look back and I'm like, I can't believe you did that. Like now, now that I realize
I'm like, Oh my God. And, but I didn't think about it back then. Yeah. Um, you'll feel
hangovers the night before. Well, that's because we day drink now because we like to go to
bed at eight. Well, you got to pick one or the other. There, you cannot do both. You
cannot start at 11 a.m. And finish at four in the morning. Well, we do do that still
sometimes. I haven't done it in a very long time. Well, not four o'clock in the morning,
but like two o'clock. The only time I do it is with you. I don't know why it's always
with me. It's not, it shouldn't always be with me, but it's the truth I guess. It's
because we have so much fun. I can't stop. And speaking of, you'll wish you hadn't fallen
asleep with your makeup on. Oh my God. I do that all the time still. Girl, they say that
it ages your face seven years every time you sleep with your makeup on. Listen, honey.
The other day I was at the, um, what is that bar called? Uh, the Derby. Oh, I saw that.
And this lady was standing bar. She's 37 or not at the bar. We're standing in line for
the bathroom. She looks the same age as me. She's 37. I'm 35. She's like, well, I'm so
much older than you. I was like, no, you're not. And she's like, yes, I am. And I was
like arguing back and forth. I was like, I'm 35. I was like, well, how old are you? She
was like 37. I was like, well, I'm only two years younger than you. And she's like, oh,
and she pointed to these girls that look like they were about 18. She's like, I mean, I'm
assuming these girls were like 25 and I just assume that's how old you are. And I was like,
it's because I was wearing a t-shirt and leggings. I didn't get drunk. Like I feel like I look
younger. So yes, I was like, nope. I didn't know we were going like out like that. 100%.
That is something that I did not know was a concept in my twenties that I know now that
it is not a fashion show. Comfort is key. I've said this so many freaking times and
it, you can meet a man in a t-shirt and leggings at the bar if you so wish. It doesn't matter
because nobody really fucking cares. Speaking of meeting a man at the bar in my t-shirt
and leggings, I was wearing my, uh, pair ring. Where is it? You took it off. Well, because
I haven't been going, I've been in the house for two days. Okay. So I don't have it on.
I don't like, don't like wearing jewelry. Like I don't even, I have, I did have earrings
on because I had to, well, I did have, I had a zoom call. So I had to have those earrings
on. So, uh, I was at the bar and I got the first time in my entire life, a man slash
boy, I think he was a boy, bought me a drink and passed it through my friends, passed it
through Rose and Dana and like some other people pass it through them and was like,
I want it to be for that girl right there. Yeah. No, I, well, we'll go about, we won't
talk about that on public, but, but also then after that, the police officer who was working
that night, we won't mention his name. I did want him to come. I asked him if we could
enter, if I could phone interview him for the Carly Russell thing. Like not because
he doesn't know anything about it. It's not Hoover police department, but he was, I wanted
to like ask him about like what they, how they handle situations like that, like why
they didn't release it for four days. Things like that. Yeah. Anyway, so he also was like,
I like, I'm pretty sure I touched his taser accidentally and not the taser, like the real
taser and he was like, he liked me. He's still texting me sometimes. Okay. So anyways, Popo
liked me. I'm calling Popo and that was two, but nobody mentioned anything about the ring,
but I was in t-shirt and leggings and I had my ring on and that never happens to me. I
never get hit on ever. So I don't know if it was the leggings and it was the leggings
for the cop. He was like, he said, dope personality, dude. I didn't talk to them before they talked
to me. So they probably saw you. I know cause I'm cool. They saw you from the corner of
the eye and they said, no, he did say, he said, I don't, he was like, not a lot of girls,
not a lot of, I don't know if he said white girls, but I knew he meant it. Not a lot of
white girls like you are thick, natural thick like you, you know? Yeah. And I was like,
yeah, I know. I get it from my mama. Okay. So anyways, um, you'll find out who your friends
are. Well, yeah, I mean like, I don't think that has anything to do necessarily. Well,
maybe in your thirties because people start either getting married or having kids and
stuff like that. So I think that at that point in time, you know, when your friends start
getting married and having kids, like you do have to make more of an effort to keep
up with that friendship. So maybe, I mean, in that context, I was going to ask, I was
like, how do you find out who your friends are? Like, is it, it's because like the people
that want to make an effort to like hang out with you, you know, and make you a, not necessarily
a priority, but like make you like your relationship like happen. Sure. Like maybe they become
a different kind of friend where it's more of like an acquaintance type situation now
instead of like a you go grab dinner or like tech, you know, I'm sorry to say it, but you
can spend quality time texting a friend. That's true. Like in catching up that way. You just
do. So yeah. But anyways, you can't have everything. Yes, you can. Okay. I think we can. I don't
know. There's always going to be sacrifices to be made. Well, there are always sacrifices
to be made, but I think it's possible. I think everything is possible. And I stopped trying
to kill my buzz. Okay. Your buzz from your water. Right. Okay. No, my buzz on life. Um,
you can still take risks and make changes. Like there's no period in time where you just
have to stop doing those things. Doing what? They risk. Oh, and make, okay. So hold on.
You can still take, oh, I thought, okay. So it's not like you can still take risks and
make changes at the same time. I I'm confused. I think what they were saying is like just
because you like hit 30 doesn't mean that you have to be complacent in your life. Okay.
So it's, it's, you can still take risks and you can also still make changes, not you can
still be at risk. And make changes like because of the risks. I was getting confused on the
wording in that. I don't know what's going on with my head right now. Okay. I got you.
So like basically if you wanted to move somewhere, you could. That's making a change and a risk
at the same time. If you wanted to change like I did, I'm in my thirties and I changed
industries as far as my job goes. I mean my job title and what I actually do is, you know,
relatively the same. The concept is anyways, but I mean I made a change to a completely
different industry and I have no regrets. I'm ready to make a complete change to a different
industry called, um, socialite, no work. Um, I'll play, have a lot of money. Please help
me out. Go fund me. I sound so terrible. I do work really hard. You do work hard, but
I think that's why you say the things that you say because you know that you bust your
ass and this, the thought of that is fun time for you. Right. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. Um, travel
while you don't have too many ties, which like babies and yeah, I would, yeah, I would
assume like husbands that are going to be like, eh, you can't go on a girl's trip. Yeah.
Yeah. Oh, but you know what? Also don't marry somebody. This is another thing you should,
you should do. Don't marry somebody that's going to turn into that person that says that
you can't go and marry somebody that has their friend, their own friends and has you have
friends or their friends with your friends and they allow you to not like both of you
have, can be your own person and you don't have to be together at all. Gracefully independent
when you're gone. Exactly. And not bitch at you about it. Right. Um, sleep becomes increasingly
important, which we talked about. Sleep is always important. It is. And we talked about
it last week. My biggest fear being not sleeping and guess who hasn't slept very good in the
last two nights? This girl. And it's really annoying and super frustrating. Like I'm going
to have some vodka drinks when I go home so I can conk out tonight. Okay. I'm on board
with that. Maybe I should do that too. But, but then here comes this one. Start going
to sleep and waking up at the same time every day. Was that Michelle? What's her name? And
that face? Yes. Oh my God. You're reading my mind today. Like literally, did you see
my face? And I was like, I had that. I was like, going to say it after you finished.
I was like, you still look just like her. And you said it before I could say it. Oh,
you look just like you had that all. What's her name? Michelle Dubose or something? I
can't remember, but she is, she has some standups and she was also the assistant in always be
my maybe. And she's in the host of the circle. Oh, she was the host of the circle. Yeah.
Oh, that's what I already said. I really liked her. I forgot about her being the host of
the circle, but she is, has this new show called, what did I call it? Oh, it's down
with the thickness. And she, Sarah is like, they do so many like faces and the way that
they talk, like, cause she has like an, an accent, like a New York accent. I don't know
if it's New York, but she has a Northern accent or a different accent than Southern. And I
feel like she says stuff and I am just like, that is Sarah and like their faces have kind
of the same shape, but sort of, but not really. They're both very pretty and they both have
curly hair. And it's just like, I mean, her hair is a lot curlier than Sarah's, but, but
it's like, I like see her when I watch her, I'm like, I take it as a compliment because
I also think that she's very pretty and I think she's funny. So I'll take it any day.
She's hilarious. But my next one was going to be after I talked about having some vodka
drinks and going to bed was start going to sleep and waking up at the same time every
day. Yeah. I can't do that. I can't either. I did really good last night. So last night
I was editing and I was done by like nine 30. Normally it's like two o'clock in the
morning and I'm like, ah, there was a lot, you know, those things happen sometimes. Start
learning to be happy with what you have. That is, that is a really good thing. So like,
I have to wake up every day and be like, I'm, I'm very happy with that. I have, I mean,
sometimes I'm like, Oh my God, my house is a wreck, but like, I like to go out on my,
like, which I cannot technically allow to go on my balcony right now, but we're just
going to say, I like to look out the window on my balcony and be like, this is amazing.
I can't believe I have this. And look what you did. Look what you worked for and what
you got. And I did that with Rose and DJ. I should do that in the morning. You should,
I should wake up and just be thankful. Yeah. Thankful. I'm awake. Thankful that my dog
is awake or whatever. And look what you've worked for. You've worked so hard for all
these things that you have. Yeah. It's so true. Yeah. Yeah. Um, stop thinking you need
to satisfy everyone. That's a huge problem that I have. And I feel like you do as well.
And I think it's really important to make sure that you take care of yourself sometimes.
I have that problem, but I also have a problem with, with me, all me thinking I shouldn't
have to satisfy everyone, but in my body, I'm like, I need to satisfy everybody. But
I'm like, I shouldn't have to do this. So I get pissed off and I'll be like, no, I'm
not doing that. You know what I mean? Like, Oh, recently this has happened a lot lately.
And I'm like, I shouldn't have to defend myself either for some things that I, like if I'm
not going to do something, I shouldn't have to be like, well, this is why I shouldn't
have to defend myself. I should just be able to say no. Right. Yeah. So, um, start forgiving
yourself for your mistakes. And I think that's super important. And I think that if we learned
that early on, that it was, you know, okay to make mistakes, even ones of like major
magnitude that a lot of people in life would have very different attitudes because if we're
taught that it's like the end of the world when we fail at something or maybe don't do
something, you know, a hundred percent correct, you know, not necessarily failure, like of
a class or whatever, like that can give a kid anxiety big time. Well, that's how I feel
like my whole life. Like if I did something wrong and like, I felt, I felt, and maybe
it wasn't like that with guilt. I don't think that my parents aimed it at me or did it on
purpose, but like, I felt like it was the end of the world if something. Yeah. Absolutely.
But maybe that's why I'm so awesome. Yeah. I don't know. It could be bad or good. Um,
and then the last one of these is just, there's no one form of success. Um, and I agree with
that. I mean, self comparison, we've talked about it before, especially with social media.
It's definitely there, but I think we should all remind ourselves just like we talked about
being thankful in the morning. Remind yourself that you are your own success and whatever
it means to you or not what it means to somebody else. Yeah. Um, and then the last three that
I wrote down, they were how to buy a house, how to change a tire and how to change a diaper.
Yeah. Like, okay. If you don't know how to change a diaper yet, something wrong with
you. I mean, I haven't had to do it in a really long time, but like, it's not like goals.
Well, I know a lot of people that don't know how to do it. Oh yeah. And I, and people that
haven't had, and that's the thing. So like when I, when Daniel, um, my, my brothers,
both of my brothers started having kids, I didn't know what to do with the kid because
like my parents never really had like friends that had younger kids around me. And I had
a lot of other friends, a lot of my friends in high school had younger siblings. I just
had Daniel and he's like 18 months younger than me. So we didn't have a lot of like young
kids that we had to like take care of or like we went over to their house and their friends
were there with their baby, you know, they, those things. So I didn't get to like do the
babysitting thing. Um, and I didn't know what to do, like how to hold a baby. I don't know
how to do anything. I was like, Oh, when I saw babies, like, Oh God, I'm going to hurt
it. I mean, they're cute, whatever. But like, I didn't know what to do, but I learned and
I was like, I can't believe I never learned how to do this. Right. Um, and I feel like
when you first do it, you feel like you're, you know, Oh my gosh, this is, I don't know
if I'm doing, you know, but it's really not hard and you should know how to do it. Yeah,
for sure. And then changing a tire on your car, I learned how to do that. My dad made
me do it multiple times before I started driving. And the other day, my neighbor, she got a
flat tire and was like, Oh my God, I need to drive. She was going to drive her car on
the flat tire. That's like two words. I know. I said, no, no, no. She was driving off and
she wanted, I thought she, she wanted me to take her there. She was driving off in her
car to the place and I was like, Whoa, whoa, whoa. Running after her, like yelling, stop,
you're going to ruin your rim. Like you're going to ruin your tire. Like you're, you're
going to have to get a whole wheel. And she was like, Oh, and I'm like, yeah, like you
need to park it. And like there's wheels for a reason. I know. And I said, I'll change
it for you and how to do it. She's like, no, I have AAA for that. And I'm like, well, okay.
That makes, I mean, that's easier for me, but I will do it as well. Like if I were in
an area where AAA couldn't get to me for like a really long time or just couldn't get to
me period, then I would change the tire by myself, but I have AAA. I'm calling them first.
Right. I don't have AAA. I have, I'm sure my insurance, like if I called them or whatever,
I would send somebody, but yeah, I know that you should definitely know how to do that.
Look, I know how to do so many jacked up things when a car that breaks down because I had
to drive so many times with the car broken down. I like, I, and I'm pretty sure that
my car, my car that I have now is going to soon become, be coming to the age of when
it starts. Like it doesn't have a lot of miles on it, but it's like old, it looks like getting,
it's probably like four years old, but soon, cause time goes by very fast, especially gets
by faster when you get older. It's going to be to the point where it's going to be like
start breaking down again. And I drive my car until it's dead. Always. I don't know
why because I don't like want to go buy a car. I also don't want to have a car payment.
So that, and you should learn how to like budget and like buy, like learn the things
that you're supposed to do as an adult. Like if you want to buy a house, like those, my
parents didn't teach me anything. And then I asked them and they blow your, your realtor
will tell you my realtor didn't tell me anything unless I asked her, ask questions. That is
a big thing. Ask questions. Don't just like go through life, like assuming somebody's
going to tell you or Google it and assume that everything you read is right. Yeah. Don't
do that. But also learn what they teach you this. And I don't know if they teach you in
a high school or college, but they teach you this in something that there are certain references
on the internet and places that are correct and certain places that are not. Right. And
sometimes Buzzfeed is not most of the time, Buzzfeed all the time. Buzzfeed is not the
right answer, but we do use that a lot for our references just because it's funny. Well,
yeah, because we're using it in a comical way. So we're not trying to be factual. So
yeah, but yeah, that, and then also don't, you should, you should learn how to rescue
a dog and not have to keep it. Cause all of my friends have like 15 dogs each. Except
for me. Well, you have one, but yours is like five dogs compared to like my, all my dogs
together is the size of your dog. So, I don't know. We, we can cut this short today. Is
that why you're getting up, sitting up straight? Well, I'm uncomfortable. I'm uncomfortable.
I'm hungry and it has nothing to do with your chair or anything like that. No, I'm just
changing positions. She's hungry. So we gonna get out of here since we gave you a bonus
episode last week. Hey, if you haven't listened to it, check it out. It's actually really
good about Carly Russell. So love y'all. My bird, my bird cats coming in here. He's hungry
or something. I don't know. Oh shoot. Cricket said, yeah. Okay. All right. Thanks for joining
us this week. Y'all. You can find us on Instagram at thick AF podcast. Send us an email with
some topics or things that you want to discuss or, you know, tell us a dirty secret. We'll
read it online and we'll keep you anonymous. That would be fun. Um, you can find us anywhere
you find your podcast and we will catch you next time.
ABCDEFG. I have to go.