WEBVTT

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Hey there, pants people. David here, your dungeon

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master. Real quick, just wanted to touch base

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on some pretty cool things that are happening

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behind the zipper on our little show. Really

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soon here, we're going to do a, well, an unzipped

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episode. That's what we're calling it. Basically,

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we're going to talk shop, talk about the show,

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talk about the game, talk about our decisions

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and things we laughed at, things we had fun with,

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things that went off the rails, and hopefully

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answer some questions. So if you've got questions

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for us, please check out our Facebook at Fancy

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Pants. I don't fucking know how Facebook works.

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Yeah, just check out Fantasy Pants. Search Fantasy

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Pants on whatever social media site you use.

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Facebook and Twitter and Instagram. I don't know.

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That's all of them. We'll get a Discord soon.

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I like that one. Anyway, yeah, please, please,

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please send me your questions. I love to talk

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about the game like any big nerd does. And I

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want to be friends. I want to talk with you.

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So please, check us out. Welcome, folks, to another

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episode of Journeys Through the Radiant Citadel.

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Here we're going to talk about the world of Sipsunko,

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and more notably, the Valley of Zantini. Here

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we're going to see dense mountains, jungles,

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farms, and most notably, the Densing Night Market,

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known by tourists as the Dancing Market for its

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festive atmosphere and magical lights and the

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constantly moving, shifting tents. The population

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in the valley is primarily humans, orcs, kobolds,

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gnomes, and dragonborn. It is the home of many

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nature spirits, which hold a special place in

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the history of this world. You see, centuries

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ago, hordes of orcs invaders tried to attack

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from outside the valley. A hero, a sorcerer known

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as Fire Maymoon, climbed a great mountain known

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as the Aran Mountain and pleaded with the great

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spirits of the land at the top. There they formed

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a broken ring of jagged mountains that encircle

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and protect this valley, where it doesn't border

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the great and powerful Lynx River, sealing out

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their orcish hordes and protecting our lands

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for, well, for generations to come. This has

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been another episode of Journeys Through the

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Radiance at Hell. Stay safe out there, folks.

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Good timing. Yeah, I still don't understand how

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you timed that perfectly so many fucking times.

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It's so weird. It's so weird. Like, every fucking

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time. That was dumb luck. Perfect. That was me

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reaching the end of my note and being like, I

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didn't actually have a way to wrap this up. And

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then the song ends. And then I was kind of like,

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that did it for me. Great. Good. Makes me sound

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professional. So you're going to pull that map

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up for us, right? So we can see what you're talking

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about as far as rivers surrounding valleys and

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shit like that. Uh, actually not because you're

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on a different map now. Sorry. Cool. Great. Too

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late for that now because you're moving in towards

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a situation where last we left off a few minutes

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ago in this room. Last week for everybody else.

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You were all moving down the road, having a conversation

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about something stupid and you're cut off when

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you heard a voice up ahead, a female voice, but

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very rough. And I believe it said something to

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the effect of. Thieves! Criminals! You've ruined

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me! Scary. That was pretty good. What do you

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want to do about this? Can we see anything? No.

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You need to move up on the road a bit. Basically,

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the road curves ahead, and what you hear is just

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around the curve. But right now, the dense forestry

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is blocking your view of whatever is. the cause

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of this. Okay. Well, I'm interested in, I'm interested

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in getting eyes on the situation. Yeah. I'm going

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to, I'm going to immediately just kind of draw

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my rapier. Okay. And kind of scoot up a little

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quickly to kind of look around, look around the

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bend. So you guys, I think Chester's with me

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too, with his dagger ready. Yeah. I think he

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probably has a sling just because he's, he knows

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it's like, I mean, and we're not necessarily

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thinking that we're going to be attacked. We're

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thinking that we're about to help somebody. Yeah,

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makes a lot of sense. Well, if there are assailants

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on the road and somebody has been burgled, we

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don't know which direction they're going. They

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could be coming our direction. They could be

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going the opposite direction. Right. There's

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only one road. I'm thinking we should close quarters

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and get a little tighter. For sure. I definitely

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want to get visual. Absolutely. Move as a unit.

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You all move up as a unit. You kind of get to

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where you can sort of peek around some trees

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and get a view of the scene. And what you see

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first. is that there's a wagon, a lone wagon,

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resting in the middle of the road. You see no

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beast of burden that should be pulling it, though

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it's facing in your direction, where the beast

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would have been tethered. Nothing at the front.

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But you do see that it sort of pulled off to

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the side of the road just a little bit. And you

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see, I think, the last lingering remnants of

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a horde of what looks like small animals. What

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they are, I'll let you roll a perception check

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for me. You see these animals, basically a bunch

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of them just disappearing into the growth around,

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vanishing into the shadows between trees. Go

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ahead and roll your perception to see what else

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you notice here. Jules got a 14. Well, my passive

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perception is 9. Okay, that's very impressive.

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I rolled an 11. 11, okay. So, you said, how much?

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18. No, 14, sorry. 14. All I'll say for you,

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Jules, is what you see running into the woods

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looks like small creatures with thick, almost

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armor -looking scales, almost like a shell covering

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its back. It almost looks like a turtle for a

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half second, and you're like, no, no, that was

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definitely not a turtle. Too fast and too mammalian.

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Were those the tortoises that were ahead of us

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in line? I was going to ask. Is that a thing?

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We move faster than we know. Is there anybody

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else still on the road? Yes, you see there is

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an orcish woman with bright green skin and a

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purple tunic. She's pacing and running back and

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forth in front of the wagon and in front of a...

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Two other figures that are basically just kind

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of almost backing away from her. You see two

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different robed figures with tan skin, black

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hair. Probably like a man and a woman. They look

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like they have a decently... What's the word?

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Fine clothing? Like they have some decent upbringing.

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And the man's just like... This is preposterous.

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We did nothing wrong. It simply opened up its

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own accord. I swear. And the orc's just like,

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No! You released them! How will I make any money

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for my children now? Those were my livestock

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to sell at the market, and I have nothing! Nothing!

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You fools! You have to pay for this! You have

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to pay! Do you guys want to do anything? Well,

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Zebulon draws his bow and knocks an arrow, but...

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He's kind of going to defer to Emin Rath here.

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He's kind of looking to the luminary for guidance.

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He's not really sure how to handle this situation

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or even approach it. Nor am I, because I'm still

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assessing. I'm still assessing. I think I yell

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out, hold on a minute. Hold on a minute. What?

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What? Hold on. What's going on here? And you

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come out in the open. Yes, I walk out. And then

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Wrath steps out into the open, begins to move

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down the road towards this situation. You see

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these two robed, they're both humans, look over

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at you with these wide eyes. They're confused

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and terrified, they look like. And they almost

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look relieved as you're coming. And you look

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at the orcish woman, and she also looks quite

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relieved. Who are you, good sir? I am Eamon Wrath

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of the Silver Hills, and I'm here to say hi.

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I was having a peaceful walk. I was having a

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peaceful hike or a walk when we came upon your

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situation. What is going on here? I hear screams

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in the woods and... This never makes someone

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comfortable when they're hiking looking for peace

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and quiet. Everybody thinks that Leave No Trace

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has to do with fecal matter and bottle caps,

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but sometimes Leave No Trace can be sounds and

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sight. You know, if you wear a bright orange

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or if you're playing your instrument really loud.

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A couple of hiking dorks here in the show tonight,

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folks. There are all kinds of dorks in this world.

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Just throw that out there. I'm going to roll

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a history check on you real quick. Emonrath.

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That sounds familiar, but I don't recognize the

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name. It's nothing to you. It's nothing to you.

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It's not important. Well, what's important now

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is that these hooligans have released my... My

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notes. Released my notes! Now I can't find them.

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My turtle -looking creatures. My pangolins. I

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had a shipment of pangolin, 20 of them, to sell

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at the night market. They're very, very popular

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pets here, and many off -worlders like to take

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them with them, but now I have nothing to sell.

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How did they get them in the first place? They

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came upon my wagon and released them when I was

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off feeding them out. I don't understand why.

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We did no such thing, no. We just came by, and

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the car just opened of its own accord. They rushed

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out, and we were left with a... Pants over our

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ankles or something. That's a saying we have.

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I have a very, very similar saying. Yes, yes,

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I understand completely. Yes. Okay, where did

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they go? Did they fly? Did they walk? Where'd

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they go? They rushed everywhere into the woods.

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We'll never catch them now. Look, what has to

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happen is these folk need to pay me for what

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they did. And they refused, making up some lie

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about how it opened of its own accord, which

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is frankly ridiculous. You agree? Yes, sir. At

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this point, I want to do, what, a check on the...

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What do you want to check? Well, I want to check

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on the honesty or demeanor, character of the

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two people. That's an insight check? Insight

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check, yes. Yes, absolutely. Oh, my gosh. You

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just did a check of your own accord. This is

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great. Heck yes. So your insight's a plus one.

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Give me your roll. So, seven. Seven. Yeah, you're

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looking at them, and they look genuinely confused,

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the two humans. But you're not sure. And you

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guys, you're seeing this now. I think Jules wants

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in on that inside check, too. Okay, so you guys,

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I think you're there, and you're kind of looking,

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taking this in. You feel the presence of these

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three others walking with you move up beside

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you. So you said that there was a mount, but

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I don't see... It's in the woods! How did the

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mount get loose? It's not loose. I was taking

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it for a brief walk to let it breathe and eat.

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It was tired. And when I walked away from my

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wagon thinking it was safe, these fools came

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by and released everything. Can we see the mount?

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You cannot see the mount. Okay. So I think Zebulon

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maybe will walk in the direction that she pointed.

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Did she point? Towards the mount? She did not

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point. Do you want to roll a check to see if

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you can roll investigation? First of all, Jules,

00:12:44.610 --> 00:12:47.070
what did you roll for your insight? 14 for insight.

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The two humans seem genuinely confused. They

00:12:51.149 --> 00:12:52.889
seem genuinely confused and scared. They don't

00:12:52.889 --> 00:12:54.789
know what's going on. I'll roll investigation.

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Okay. So you can also roll survival for this,

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too. Following tracks. Let me check my stats.

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Well, you see, since my character is shit. My

00:13:05.970 --> 00:13:08.970
investigation is intelligence minus two. My survival

00:13:08.970 --> 00:13:11.730
is wisdom minus three. If given the choice, I'll

00:13:11.730 --> 00:13:14.330
roll investigation. Okay. If you don't mind.

00:13:14.509 --> 00:13:17.590
You can roll whatever you want. So that's a six.

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Minus two is four. I have no idea where the mount

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is. You're looking at it and you're like, my

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God, the mount just vanished. There's no tracks.

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It flew. Where's the mount? It's in the woods.

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I told you. So we have to explore. Do you want

00:13:36.409 --> 00:13:39.549
to roll? You can also roll that if you want to,

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Stomp. To do a bushwhack? Yeah, so let's roll

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that over. What does a four get me? Do I just

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pick a random direction and walk towards what

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I think is the direction the mount went? You

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literally have no clue. That's basically what

00:13:55.049 --> 00:13:58.389
you have. There's no direction. You just think

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the mount vanished because you can't see any

00:14:00.269 --> 00:14:03.309
tracks of the four. The mount is there somewhere.

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He just doesn't know which direction it went.

00:14:05.709 --> 00:14:07.990
But he's going to infer. He's going to infer.

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Everyone walks over the wagon and looks under

00:14:10.129 --> 00:14:13.289
the wagon like, hey, man, you there? Yeah, but

00:14:13.289 --> 00:14:14.990
what about the pangolins? I think, yeah, I think

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Jules and Chester have already started going

00:14:17.889 --> 00:14:21.629
into the woods. Okay. All right. So basically,

00:14:21.750 --> 00:14:24.090
the woods, you're basically on a purely southern

00:14:24.090 --> 00:14:25.590
track, so you can go to the east or the west.

00:14:25.889 --> 00:14:28.309
Which way do you want to go? Don't look at me.

00:14:28.350 --> 00:14:31.679
I'm under the fucking wagon. The wagon rolls

00:14:31.679 --> 00:14:34.679
over. That already happened. That's a natural

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one. We're going to go west because west is the

00:14:37.440 --> 00:14:40.679
best. Natural one, horses, every time. How about

00:14:40.679 --> 00:14:43.080
we go towards the town that we're headed to just

00:14:43.080 --> 00:14:44.720
because we don't want to waste too much time.

00:14:44.720 --> 00:14:46.639
We're just going to walk right by these fuckers.

00:14:47.200 --> 00:14:50.080
Whatever you want to do. You can do insight checks

00:14:50.080 --> 00:14:52.159
on anyone here. You can do more investigations.

00:14:52.700 --> 00:14:54.720
It's up to you. I'll make it a point that we're

00:14:54.720 --> 00:14:58.600
not going way the fuck down. We're just kind

00:14:58.600 --> 00:15:02.000
of... exploring a little further than the immediate

00:15:02.000 --> 00:15:03.799
sphere. All right. How about this? How about

00:15:03.799 --> 00:15:07.960
this? So Zebulon has no idea where this mount

00:15:07.960 --> 00:15:12.820
is because he's a fucking idiot. He's going to

00:15:12.820 --> 00:15:16.940
try an insight check on the lady who's riding

00:15:16.940 --> 00:15:20.440
the cart. Okay. So you're going to check the

00:15:20.440 --> 00:15:22.159
woods. You're kind of exploring around. Yep.

00:15:22.220 --> 00:15:24.139
You are going to do an insight check. I'm looking

00:15:24.139 --> 00:15:25.820
for pangolins. You're looking for pangolins.

00:15:25.820 --> 00:15:27.220
Okay. So you guys are all checking the woods.

00:15:27.340 --> 00:15:30.110
Yep. You guys can all roll survival or investigations,

00:15:30.309 --> 00:15:31.950
and you're doing insight. What'd you roll? My

00:15:31.950 --> 00:15:36.149
passive insight is seven. And I rolled lower

00:15:36.149 --> 00:15:37.570
than that. Get out of the adventure. What are

00:15:37.570 --> 00:15:40.389
you doing here? Dude. You're slowing us down.

00:15:42.110 --> 00:15:44.850
All right, so nothing happens. You look at her

00:15:44.850 --> 00:15:46.990
and, yeah, what's a seven? She looks like she's

00:15:46.990 --> 00:15:49.750
telling the truth. I'm not the DM. Yeah. Good.

00:15:52.230 --> 00:15:55.190
You guys can roll investigation or insight. Stomp.

00:15:55.830 --> 00:15:57.309
You're going to want to roll investigation here.

00:15:57.690 --> 00:16:02.289
That's a plus two. 16. 16. 18. 18. Okay, so you

00:16:02.289 --> 00:16:04.149
guys start looking around, and you look down

00:16:04.149 --> 00:16:06.870
at the ground, and you see there are very clear

00:16:06.870 --> 00:16:08.870
tracks, and you realize that Zebulon must be

00:16:08.870 --> 00:16:11.889
an idiot to have not seen them. Gasp. I mean,

00:16:11.909 --> 00:16:16.250
I'm pretty sure Jules already knew this. And

00:16:16.250 --> 00:16:18.909
you see these tracks are heading up. They're

00:16:18.909 --> 00:16:21.570
heading over to the west, straight into the woods,

00:16:21.590 --> 00:16:23.250
cutting straight into the woods up a ways. Hold

00:16:23.250 --> 00:16:25.779
on. Check her. Check her. Take this. Zebulon

00:16:25.779 --> 00:16:29.620
reaches through his pocket, pulls out the diamond

00:16:29.620 --> 00:16:33.200
recorder, and hands it to Chester. What am I

00:16:33.200 --> 00:16:35.480
doing with this? You might want this. All right.

00:16:35.600 --> 00:16:37.820
I mean, I don't know. I could sell it. Something

00:16:37.820 --> 00:16:40.120
really cool might happen. Chester, no. Oh, all

00:16:40.120 --> 00:16:42.100
right. No money. I'll keep my eye on the guy.

00:16:42.120 --> 00:16:44.840
No sell. How do I use this? He puts it up, and

00:16:44.840 --> 00:16:46.620
he just goes up to his eye, and he goes, record.

00:16:47.059 --> 00:16:49.080
And it's kind of like you see it shines for a

00:16:49.080 --> 00:16:52.220
brief second. Everything he's seeing is being

00:16:52.220 --> 00:16:54.759
recorded as he's looking at you guys. And I'm

00:16:54.759 --> 00:16:56.539
immediately going to go, no, no, no, no, no.

00:16:57.320 --> 00:16:59.139
That was your really good guess. Stop, and it

00:16:59.139 --> 00:17:01.399
cuts the recording. Yeah, so I'm just going to

00:17:01.399 --> 00:17:05.460
swat the diamond down from Chester's eye. To

00:17:05.460 --> 00:17:08.420
stop recording, can I just say stop recording?

00:17:08.660 --> 00:17:11.279
Just say stop. Stop. And you see the light just

00:17:11.279 --> 00:17:14.640
kind of dims on it. Oh, yeah, all right. I'll

00:17:14.640 --> 00:17:16.359
do it later. Yeah, but, like, what if we, I mean,

00:17:16.359 --> 00:17:18.710
this could be really cool. This could be good

00:17:18.710 --> 00:17:21.410
for us. We're looking for a, what, a penguin?

00:17:21.829 --> 00:17:24.970
A pangolin. A pangolin. Oh, a pangolin. We're

00:17:24.970 --> 00:17:26.289
looking for one of those. It's not that cool.

00:17:26.609 --> 00:17:29.390
I mean, sure, but I think there's a bunch of

00:17:29.390 --> 00:17:31.769
them. I guess. Yeah, we're going to wrangle up

00:17:31.769 --> 00:17:34.089
50. And there's a real luminary here. I mean,

00:17:34.089 --> 00:17:35.910
there is a real guy. Yeah, it could be good for

00:17:35.910 --> 00:17:38.250
us. I'll keep it on. Jules, if something cool

00:17:38.250 --> 00:17:41.390
happens, can I record? Jules, what if you take

00:17:41.390 --> 00:17:44.509
your hood and you pull it over your face? I'll

00:17:44.509 --> 00:17:45.849
try to get the back of your head. I've got some

00:17:45.849 --> 00:17:48.140
claws. I can poke some. Hold it in there for

00:17:48.140 --> 00:17:50.980
you like a mask. My hood is still on that goblin

00:17:50.980 --> 00:17:57.640
bastard. It's true. We left your beloved sack

00:17:57.640 --> 00:17:59.440
hood on the goblin. Do we have anything that

00:17:59.440 --> 00:18:02.359
we could use as a makeshift mask for Jules LaRoche?

00:18:02.519 --> 00:18:05.279
I don't know. Do you? No. Tell me. I don't know

00:18:05.279 --> 00:18:07.279
your pockets. No. At the end of that episode,

00:18:07.359 --> 00:18:10.960
I made it a pointed fact that I'm very aware

00:18:10.960 --> 00:18:14.319
that I just left my hood. Okay. Well, I have

00:18:14.319 --> 00:18:16.509
like basic. So I'm. Shit out of luck. Like starting

00:18:16.509 --> 00:18:20.130
adventure stuff. Like I have ball bearings and

00:18:20.130 --> 00:18:22.470
a crowbar. Those will work good for a disguise.

00:18:22.650 --> 00:18:25.690
No, they won't. Yeah, they'll work. I have rations

00:18:25.690 --> 00:18:27.990
for a day. You can smear rations on his face.

00:18:28.309 --> 00:18:30.490
I've got apparently 10 pounds of leather. How

00:18:30.490 --> 00:18:32.710
about a water ski? 10 pounds of leather? Why?

00:18:32.710 --> 00:18:34.190
Do you have any idea how many superhero masks

00:18:34.190 --> 00:18:36.390
we can make with 10 pounds of leather? That's

00:18:36.390 --> 00:18:39.089
a lot of leather. At least one. Sorry, it's my

00:18:39.089 --> 00:18:42.940
light armor. Oh, my God. That makes sense. Whoops.

00:18:44.440 --> 00:18:46.940
Minus one AC because we just used a pound of

00:18:46.940 --> 00:18:48.180
leather to make a mask for you. You just got

00:18:48.180 --> 00:18:50.660
your 10 pounds of leather up. It's like, that

00:18:50.660 --> 00:18:54.539
was leather armor. I thought it was hot at first.

00:18:54.579 --> 00:18:56.440
I'm like, what the fuck am I doing with 10 pounds

00:18:56.440 --> 00:18:59.180
of leather? You can't. All right, Cheshire. All

00:18:59.180 --> 00:19:02.059
right. You know what, Chesh? Forget about Jules,

00:19:02.180 --> 00:19:05.380
but... Never. What? I would never forget about

00:19:05.380 --> 00:19:07.259
Jules. Listen, listen. I love the guy. Listen.

00:19:07.400 --> 00:19:10.579
All right. With the recorder. Yeah. But if I

00:19:10.579 --> 00:19:14.359
do anything cool, just stay record. All right,

00:19:14.359 --> 00:19:16.680
shrimp. I got you. What are you calling shrimp?

00:19:16.940 --> 00:19:21.200
I'll keep my eye on you. All right. And with

00:19:21.200 --> 00:19:23.480
that, I mean, and then you very coolly stare

00:19:23.480 --> 00:19:26.420
at the orc and figure nothing out while everyone

00:19:26.420 --> 00:19:28.220
else. That orc is stone cold. You guys see a

00:19:28.220 --> 00:19:30.660
trail heading to the west, I think I said. You

00:19:30.660 --> 00:19:33.559
guys heading that way? To the valley? Into the

00:19:33.559 --> 00:19:35.160
woods. Just basically just moving right off the

00:19:35.160 --> 00:19:37.019
trail into the woods. I kind of think as we go,

00:19:37.200 --> 00:19:39.319
I don't know. You're staying there, aren't you?

00:19:39.630 --> 00:19:41.569
You've decided to stay. I think I'm canonically

00:19:41.569 --> 00:19:44.730
under the wagon. No, I mean, if you're decidedly

00:19:44.730 --> 00:19:46.130
staying there, then I'm not going to call out.

00:19:46.690 --> 00:19:51.130
Oh. My initial instinct is to call out Zeb. Come

00:19:51.130 --> 00:19:53.049
on, let's go. Okay, yeah, he can follow. Yeah.

00:19:53.650 --> 00:19:56.269
Zeb's going to follow. You guys start to move

00:19:56.269 --> 00:19:58.589
that direction, and the orc whirls on you, just

00:19:58.589 --> 00:20:01.150
like, where are you going? I'm going to find

00:20:01.150 --> 00:20:03.950
the penguins. No, what? Oh, wait, are you going

00:20:03.950 --> 00:20:05.970
for the mount or the small ones? The small ones

00:20:05.970 --> 00:20:08.089
got away. The mount, she led that way. Who are

00:20:08.089 --> 00:20:10.420
you looking for? Oh. Jules is going to try and

00:20:10.420 --> 00:20:12.279
recover the penguins. Oh, okay. So yeah, you're

00:20:12.279 --> 00:20:16.359
heading to the head and she's just, oh, uh, don't

00:20:16.359 --> 00:20:18.680
worry about that. Well, wait, you can't find

00:20:18.680 --> 00:20:20.059
them there. Well, you won't find them anywhere.

00:20:20.359 --> 00:20:23.119
Why is that? They, they're in the woods. They

00:20:23.119 --> 00:20:24.700
would have disappeared. You can't, you won't,

00:20:24.700 --> 00:20:28.740
I don't. I think, I think this, I think this

00:20:28.740 --> 00:20:31.940
warrants a new, this is a new insight check.

00:20:32.119 --> 00:20:34.420
Yep. This is new information, right? We can roll

00:20:34.420 --> 00:20:36.400
a whole new insight. We're taking this shit over.

00:20:36.599 --> 00:20:39.039
Okay, yeah. Roll an insight check. I'll allow

00:20:39.039 --> 00:20:42.380
it. Zebulon won't roll anything good. Actually,

00:20:42.559 --> 00:20:47.740
I rolled a 13. 16. 13? 13. Hang on a second.

00:20:49.579 --> 00:20:53.119
Strange things are afoot at the Circle K. Circle

00:20:53.119 --> 00:20:57.299
K. So, with a 13, Zebulon, you're just like,

00:20:57.460 --> 00:20:59.539
yeah, darn it. I guess you won't find them. She's

00:20:59.539 --> 00:21:03.440
right. Jules with a 16. You're seeing the sweat

00:21:03.440 --> 00:21:06.660
beating her head. You're seeing that she does

00:21:06.660 --> 00:21:08.880
not want you to go that way, and there's a reason

00:21:08.880 --> 00:21:12.500
for it. She's lying about something. I'm going

00:21:12.500 --> 00:21:15.480
to kind of stare right into her eyes. Is there

00:21:15.480 --> 00:21:20.460
a problem? Come on, guys, let's go check it out.

00:21:20.460 --> 00:21:24.880
Don't! Jules, we could just go that way. And

00:21:24.880 --> 00:21:27.500
Zebulon points the opposite direction, not realizing.

00:21:28.700 --> 00:21:32.119
No, Jules is on this now. Let's go. Something

00:21:32.119 --> 00:21:35.180
or someone is in trouble. I'm ready to roll.

00:21:36.380 --> 00:21:38.799
Okay, so she sees you all kind of like doing

00:21:38.799 --> 00:21:40.319
this. The two humans off to the side are like

00:21:40.319 --> 00:21:42.359
watching you with bewildered expressions. They're

00:21:42.359 --> 00:21:44.539
very hopeful. They realize something is happening

00:21:44.539 --> 00:21:47.059
here, and they were just scared. They're scared

00:21:47.059 --> 00:21:48.880
you're going to take her side, and they're just

00:21:48.880 --> 00:21:50.720
kind of watching, and she's just staring at you,

00:21:50.859 --> 00:21:55.359
and she just says, Zola! And he points to the

00:21:55.359 --> 00:21:57.960
air, and you just kind of see like the Star Wars

00:21:57.960 --> 00:22:00.940
Ranger comes alive. And all these pangolins start

00:22:00.940 --> 00:22:04.660
rushing back towards her and all just rush into

00:22:04.660 --> 00:22:08.119
her wagon. And you see they're just off in the

00:22:08.119 --> 00:22:09.700
woods a short ways, and they were all grouped

00:22:09.700 --> 00:22:11.220
together. And she just stares at him just like,

00:22:11.700 --> 00:22:16.660
so what gave us away? It doesn't matter. Ty,

00:22:16.900 --> 00:22:21.839
come on out now. The game's up. And you hear

00:22:21.839 --> 00:22:26.299
this crashing from the eastern side, the other

00:22:26.299 --> 00:22:30.630
side of the road, as this. A gigantic pangolin

00:22:30.630 --> 00:22:33.630
bursts out of the trees being ridden by this

00:22:33.630 --> 00:22:38.470
human man with a... The mount is a pangolin too?

00:22:38.710 --> 00:22:43.329
Holy fuck. That's cool. Ridden by a brown -skinned

00:22:43.329 --> 00:22:46.150
human with a rough aesthetic, patchy curly hair

00:22:46.150 --> 00:22:48.910
and an eye patch over one eye. He's got a scimitar

00:22:48.910 --> 00:22:52.269
up high. And she just looks at you and says,

00:22:52.809 --> 00:22:57.349
Well, looks like I gotta take care of ya. Sorry,

00:22:57.390 --> 00:23:01.349
nothing personal. Just business. I want you all

00:23:01.349 --> 00:23:05.230
to roll for initiative. Oh, God. I'm going to

00:23:05.230 --> 00:23:15.930
screw this lady up. Oh, my God. Freaking nat

00:23:15.930 --> 00:23:19.829
2 plus 3 is 5. 7. Well, you're ahead of Zebulon.

00:23:20.490 --> 00:23:23.529
Ooh, I love it. That's good. That's good stuff.

00:23:24.410 --> 00:23:27.910
That's good stuff. The fact that my orc gets

00:23:27.910 --> 00:23:32.190
to go first. Fuck. To hell with your orc. I forgot.

00:23:32.230 --> 00:23:35.730
I got to move you guys all much. You are heading

00:23:35.730 --> 00:23:38.789
down into the woods. So just for Claire's sake,

00:23:38.829 --> 00:23:42.049
these two humans are getting out of here. When

00:23:42.049 --> 00:23:43.329
this thing starts plundering through the woods,

00:23:43.430 --> 00:23:49.799
they just like run away. Jules. I'm going to

00:23:49.799 --> 00:23:51.799
put you about 10 feet away from the orc. You

00:23:51.799 --> 00:23:54.079
are staring her in the eye, as I remember. Chester

00:23:54.079 --> 00:23:56.119
by your side. Zebulon's moving with you guys,

00:23:56.140 --> 00:23:59.039
kind of behind. And I'm going to put Emonrath

00:23:59.039 --> 00:24:02.299
sort of leading down into the woods. So the farthest

00:24:02.299 --> 00:24:04.500
away, because he was leading the charge after

00:24:04.500 --> 00:24:07.680
these pangolin that were all right a few feet

00:24:07.680 --> 00:24:10.500
away from you in the woods, waiting for this

00:24:10.500 --> 00:24:14.500
scam to be complete. And this orcish woman is

00:24:14.500 --> 00:24:16.579
still staring you right in the eyes, Jules. And

00:24:16.579 --> 00:24:19.859
she just says, You could have just left. You

00:24:19.859 --> 00:24:21.779
could have moved on. They would have paid their

00:24:21.779 --> 00:24:23.720
due, and we would have gone on with our day,

00:24:23.779 --> 00:24:27.099
and no one had to get hurt. Oh, well. You're

00:24:27.099 --> 00:24:29.339
taking the names of hardworking people and dragging

00:24:29.339 --> 00:24:32.420
them through the mud. This is not how you make

00:24:32.420 --> 00:24:36.480
a buck. That's not honest. Honest? I'll tell

00:24:36.480 --> 00:24:37.599
you how to make work. We're going to make an

00:24:37.599 --> 00:24:39.980
honest buck. We're going to honestly cut you

00:24:39.980 --> 00:24:42.700
down and take what you have. Your friends look

00:24:42.700 --> 00:24:46.369
like they have money. Bring it on, bitch. And

00:24:46.369 --> 00:24:49.670
she just charges you and attacks. Here's what's

00:24:49.670 --> 00:24:52.089
going to happen here. Okay, there are 17 dice

00:24:52.089 --> 00:24:56.109
in my tray. Why are there 17? For the sound.

00:24:56.329 --> 00:25:01.970
Okay. His look down is just like, what? All right.

00:25:02.289 --> 00:25:05.789
What would happen if Stephen rolled 17 dice at

00:25:05.789 --> 00:25:08.210
the same time? So I, aggressive, I move up to

00:25:08.210 --> 00:25:12.210
you, and I'm going to. She just pulls this axe

00:25:12.210 --> 00:25:14.430
off of her battle axe from her belt and just.

00:25:14.859 --> 00:25:18.759
goes to cleave down at you, and rolls a natural

00:25:18.759 --> 00:25:25.440
two. Yeah, that hits. So you just say that, you're

00:25:25.440 --> 00:25:27.720
ready. She comes in swinging too fast, too hard,

00:25:27.819 --> 00:25:30.759
angry that you foiled her plans, and you just

00:25:30.759 --> 00:25:33.099
weave out of the way as she strikes down. You

00:25:33.099 --> 00:25:37.240
feel the air next to you just whistle as this

00:25:37.240 --> 00:25:39.599
axe blade almost takes you in the face. I'm just

00:25:39.599 --> 00:25:43.940
going to give a nice little step back. And as

00:25:43.940 --> 00:25:46.500
this happens, she steps up right beside you,

00:25:46.519 --> 00:25:49.579
and right beside her now is a very angry Chester,

00:25:49.640 --> 00:25:51.940
who just, Jules, look out! You little bitch!

00:25:52.180 --> 00:25:54.059
And what does he do? He's gone with his dagger.

00:25:54.700 --> 00:25:59.220
Chester. And this could be a 22. That's gonna

00:25:59.220 --> 00:26:02.140
hit! Oh my god. Fuck yeah, it's gonna hit. Alright,

00:26:02.160 --> 00:26:08.019
where's my d4? Right there. Damn. It's a 3. 3

00:26:08.019 --> 00:26:11.359
damage? Minimum damage. Minimum damage. And while

00:26:11.359 --> 00:26:12.920
Chester's doing that, Jules is going to say,

00:26:12.960 --> 00:26:16.539
it doesn't have to be like this. It doesn't have

00:26:16.539 --> 00:26:19.079
to be like this. We don't want to hurt you. We're

00:26:19.079 --> 00:26:23.319
just trying to get to the valley. Just want to

00:26:23.319 --> 00:26:28.000
get to the jinky night market. Yeah, so Chester

00:26:28.000 --> 00:26:29.400
comes in, just stabs. He probably goes right

00:26:29.400 --> 00:26:31.480
into her, like slices her arm. And she grabs

00:26:31.480 --> 00:26:34.440
it. Blood starts pouring between her fingers.

00:26:35.599 --> 00:26:39.279
And she just stares down at him. And she is mad.

00:26:40.029 --> 00:26:44.990
And you kind of hear this as the pangolin begins

00:26:44.990 --> 00:26:51.029
to charge across the way with this human still

00:26:51.029 --> 00:26:54.390
on its back. So that thing's pretty huge. What

00:26:54.390 --> 00:26:59.410
exactly is a pangolin? They're like armadillos.

00:26:59.890 --> 00:27:03.349
Sorry, sand shrew, I think. Well, I have a question.

00:27:03.450 --> 00:27:08.000
I mean, are these... Is the mount pangolin controlled

00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:12.359
by either the rider or the orc? Like if we take

00:27:12.359 --> 00:27:16.500
care of those two, is this mount? That's a good

00:27:16.500 --> 00:27:19.000
question. Out of character, I would guess that

00:27:19.000 --> 00:27:20.960
the rider is controlled. The rider is controlled.

00:27:21.039 --> 00:27:22.680
The rider has reins on it right now, but whether

00:27:22.680 --> 00:27:25.759
or not it's like bound into servitude by them,

00:27:25.839 --> 00:27:28.480
you're not sure. Okay. You did see the other

00:27:28.480 --> 00:27:30.220
pangolin were trained well enough to come back

00:27:30.220 --> 00:27:32.480
when called. Sure, sure. You can infer this one

00:27:32.480 --> 00:27:35.339
might be pretty well trained too. Right. And

00:27:35.339 --> 00:27:38.660
honestly, after seeing the orc get stabbed, this

00:27:38.660 --> 00:27:42.059
pangolin comes at Chester angrily. Huh. Yeah.

00:27:43.039 --> 00:27:46.859
It's going to attack. Attack who? Chester. Goddamn.

00:27:47.200 --> 00:27:50.140
Angrily. Yikes, that's not good. And it's an

00:27:50.140 --> 00:27:51.779
unnatural two. Good thing I have multi -attack.

00:27:55.019 --> 00:27:57.740
And it's a natural 20. Get out of town. It's

00:27:57.740 --> 00:28:02.059
a natural 20 on Chester. Oh, boy. Jesus Christ.

00:28:02.079 --> 00:28:04.559
It means double damage dice. Yeah. Chester might

00:28:04.559 --> 00:28:07.019
be down already. Yeah, for real. Chester's got,

00:28:07.099 --> 00:28:12.319
what, eight hit points? That's a lot of die.

00:28:14.859 --> 00:28:17.299
It's actually not as great as you think, but

00:28:17.299 --> 00:28:20.140
still pretty good. I rolled almost minimum damage.

00:28:20.440 --> 00:28:26.680
Okay. So it is ten damage on Chester. He is unconscious

00:28:26.680 --> 00:28:28.759
and dying. Oh, my God. No, no. He leveled up,

00:28:28.819 --> 00:28:31.680
right? Doesn't he have 11 now? He did. I don't

00:28:31.680 --> 00:28:35.019
know. You tell me. Not on the sheet? I don't

00:28:35.019 --> 00:28:37.680
know. You didn't fill it? No, I did. Yeah, it's

00:28:37.680 --> 00:28:39.680
a paper sheet. We've got to get him in D &D Beyond.

00:28:39.859 --> 00:28:42.220
That's 13. Oh, 13. That's 13. I thought it was

00:28:42.220 --> 00:28:44.400
crossed out to put three. No, no, sorry. It's

00:28:44.400 --> 00:28:46.960
13. Okay, no, he's not unconsciously dying. That

00:28:46.960 --> 00:28:49.779
is a really thick one. I thought he crossed that

00:28:49.779 --> 00:28:53.599
out after the last fight. Oh, no, no, no. I had

00:28:53.599 --> 00:28:56.559
the sheet. 13. Yeah, so he's 13. We need to get

00:28:56.559 --> 00:28:58.519
him in D &D Beyond. So remember that. Yeah, we

00:28:58.519 --> 00:29:03.119
do. Chester is now down to 3 HP. What was the

00:29:03.119 --> 00:29:05.779
damage? 10. 10, yeah. So it just comes up and

00:29:05.779 --> 00:29:08.559
breaks across. Almost minimum damage. Not great

00:29:08.559 --> 00:29:11.059
for me, but really good for Chester, who almost

00:29:11.059 --> 00:29:13.740
went down at the start of the fight. One attack.

00:29:14.019 --> 00:29:16.960
One attack. At pretty much minimum damage, almost

00:29:16.960 --> 00:29:21.220
took Chester out completely. Well, Jules, that's

00:29:21.220 --> 00:29:23.200
you. I knew you saw this pangolin hit your buddy.

00:29:24.000 --> 00:29:28.140
What are you going to do about it? I'm going

00:29:28.140 --> 00:29:31.079
to cast Dissonant Whispers on the pangolin. Interesting.

00:29:31.220 --> 00:29:33.759
Does that work on a creature with low intelligence?

00:29:33.960 --> 00:29:36.839
It doesn't say anything about intelligence. Yep.

00:29:36.940 --> 00:29:40.680
Wow. It says, I whisper a discordant melody that

00:29:40.680 --> 00:29:42.200
only one creature of your choice within range

00:29:42.200 --> 00:29:44.559
can hear. Racking it with terrible pain, you

00:29:44.559 --> 00:29:46.519
must make a wisdom saving throw. On a failed

00:29:46.519 --> 00:29:49.759
save, 3d6 psychic damage and must immediately

00:29:49.759 --> 00:29:52.579
use its reaction. 3d6 psychic damage. Must immediately

00:29:52.579 --> 00:29:56.299
use its reaction to move as far as its speed

00:29:56.299 --> 00:29:59.880
allows away from you. Oh my gosh. Nice. All right,

00:29:59.900 --> 00:30:06.440
making that save. Here we go. That is a, that

00:30:06.440 --> 00:30:12.599
is a, it's 10. Nope. Okay. Okay. Excellent. Roll

00:30:12.599 --> 00:30:16.980
me a 3d6. It's got a mounted guy on it. Oh, okay.

00:30:17.240 --> 00:30:19.339
She's going to scare it off. It's my guy. Is

00:30:19.339 --> 00:30:20.880
my guy going with it? Is the question I'm trying

00:30:20.880 --> 00:30:25.880
to figure out? 13. Oh, damn. Okay. That's pretty

00:30:25.880 --> 00:30:29.769
big damage. That's big damage. For 3d6? That's

00:30:29.769 --> 00:30:32.630
very big damage. Okay. You take a big chunk out

00:30:32.630 --> 00:30:35.450
of this pangolin and it like, what does it look

00:30:35.450 --> 00:30:38.009
like when you cast this? Do you like, I mean

00:30:38.009 --> 00:30:39.910
like, I guess, do you use your lute when you

00:30:39.910 --> 00:30:43.809
cast magic? You know, I think for this one, I'm

00:30:43.809 --> 00:30:46.049
going to stick out my hand and there's just going

00:30:46.049 --> 00:30:48.930
to be this white sparkly mist that comes out.

00:30:49.150 --> 00:30:53.930
But you hear like screams and shrieks coming

00:30:53.930 --> 00:30:59.119
from it. As it goes out and covers the pangolin.

00:30:59.660 --> 00:31:01.900
Okay. And the pangolin just, just, just kind

00:31:01.900 --> 00:31:04.579
of, I don't know what they sound like. And it

00:31:04.579 --> 00:31:06.859
just like, it just like stares around, just shaking

00:31:06.859 --> 00:31:10.380
its head wildly and turns around and bolts. And

00:31:10.380 --> 00:31:13.359
you see like blood starts running down, like

00:31:13.359 --> 00:31:15.119
from its nose, from its ears. It's just like

00:31:15.119 --> 00:31:18.299
screeching. It's a hefty amount of psych damage.

00:31:18.380 --> 00:31:19.859
And the mount on top, the guy on top is like,

00:31:19.940 --> 00:31:22.319
hey, who are you doing? Hey, no, stop, stop,

00:31:22.319 --> 00:31:24.839
stop, stop. As he's being pulled into the woods

00:31:24.839 --> 00:31:27.339
again, where they just came from. Yes. That's

00:31:27.339 --> 00:31:29.839
good. Yeah, that's down to one combatant if those

00:31:29.839 --> 00:31:31.319
two are running off. Here's the thing. They're

00:31:31.319 --> 00:31:35.200
running off, and that means that Chester and

00:31:35.200 --> 00:31:39.019
Zebulon and you, Jules, can use your action if

00:31:39.019 --> 00:31:42.279
you want to take AOOs. Oh! They're leaving your

00:31:42.279 --> 00:31:48.160
space. That's the rules. Yep. Jules is going

00:31:48.160 --> 00:31:50.599
to take one. Okay. And it's just melee, right?

00:31:51.240 --> 00:31:55.400
Yes. That is a nat 20. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my God.

00:31:55.700 --> 00:31:58.000
And it's going on the penguin, by the way. Oh,

00:31:58.000 --> 00:32:01.099
my gosh. Why not the orc? Not the orc? Yeah,

00:32:01.099 --> 00:32:03.539
the orc isn't moving. Yeah, that's just an...

00:32:03.539 --> 00:32:05.359
And the guy probably is too high up. I mean,

00:32:05.380 --> 00:32:06.700
he's technically... You could hit the guy, too.

00:32:06.799 --> 00:32:08.259
You could hit the bandit on top, too. I would

00:32:08.259 --> 00:32:10.720
imagine it probably relates somewhat to boxing

00:32:10.720 --> 00:32:13.799
stomp, where, like, if someone is getting out

00:32:13.799 --> 00:32:16.740
of your attack range... Then just... That makes

00:32:16.740 --> 00:32:18.819
them vulnerable. Gotcha, gotcha. So as they're

00:32:18.819 --> 00:32:21.599
leaving... You get that opportunity to attack

00:32:21.599 --> 00:32:23.180
them. Okay. That's a good way to look at it.

00:32:23.220 --> 00:32:26.000
I like that. All right, so roll me that natural

00:32:26.000 --> 00:32:32.380
20. I just did. No, the damage. The damage for

00:32:32.380 --> 00:32:38.039
the natural 20. I'll do mine after yours is resolved.

00:32:38.519 --> 00:32:41.960
How do we do crits? Two die rolls. Two die, yeah.

00:32:44.480 --> 00:32:50.890
That's eight. That's a crit two die for. Is it?

00:32:51.130 --> 00:32:53.710
It's just the better of the two. Or is it total?

00:32:53.930 --> 00:32:57.529
Total. Oh, fuck. 13. Yeah, and then you add the

00:32:57.529 --> 00:32:59.769
modifier after that. Just a single modifier.

00:32:59.970 --> 00:33:02.210
Yeah, I don't have a modifier for damage on my

00:33:02.210 --> 00:33:05.289
right here. It's not as beepy as I want it to

00:33:05.289 --> 00:33:10.210
be. Did not hit my AOL. Okay. And then you can

00:33:10.210 --> 00:33:12.670
roll for Chester as well. And you're not quite

00:33:12.670 --> 00:33:14.369
within five seconds. You don't get the AOL because

00:33:14.369 --> 00:33:17.680
you're kind of... Do you have a map? I do have

00:33:17.680 --> 00:33:19.259
a map. I'll show him on his round. Actually,

00:33:19.400 --> 00:33:24.460
no, this is 23 for Chester. 23 for Chester? Yeah,

00:33:25.400 --> 00:33:28.700
that hits. This is an armored thing with high

00:33:28.700 --> 00:33:31.559
AC. Stop it. So this would just be 2d4 plus 2

00:33:31.559 --> 00:33:36.660
then. If it's normally a d4 plus 2, then it's

00:33:36.660 --> 00:33:40.500
2d4 plus 2. Wait, he got a crit? Oh, no. Oh,

00:33:40.640 --> 00:33:44.130
no, you're right. So that's 6 damage. Oh, my

00:33:44.130 --> 00:33:46.289
God. Pangolin already looks pretty bad, as it

00:33:46.289 --> 00:33:50.769
just, like, turns and just, like, makes a pangolin

00:33:50.769 --> 00:33:52.289
sound. That's what they sound like. And it just,

00:33:52.329 --> 00:33:54.529
somewhere across the road, blood pouring out

00:33:54.529 --> 00:33:57.549
of it. This fucking, this pangolin did not hold

00:33:57.549 --> 00:34:00.029
itself as well as I thought. That's great for

00:34:00.029 --> 00:34:02.109
us. Yeah? It is great for you. And I didn't even

00:34:02.109 --> 00:34:04.369
use a button. Okay, I'm going to try an animal

00:34:04.369 --> 00:34:07.130
handling check to turn this thing around to charge

00:34:07.130 --> 00:34:09.309
it back into attack, because it's the bandit's

00:34:09.309 --> 00:34:11.610
turn. Actually, well, I can't, like, move, because

00:34:11.610 --> 00:34:14.030
it's... Get him out of there. Nope. You know

00:34:14.030 --> 00:34:15.550
what? All right. Pangolin moves all the way here.

00:34:15.590 --> 00:34:17.929
Bandit's actually going to jump off. Bandit realizes

00:34:17.929 --> 00:34:19.929
this is a lost cause, leaps off the pangolin,

00:34:20.030 --> 00:34:25.869
and is going to run at you. Uh -oh. And attack

00:34:25.869 --> 00:34:34.289
Jules. Attack Jules. It's a natural one. Oh,

00:34:34.309 --> 00:34:38.090
excellent. Critical failure. So that's bad. Yeah.

00:34:38.110 --> 00:34:42.369
It's so bad. He'd be worst. Okay. I mean, we

00:34:42.369 --> 00:34:43.670
don't really have, like, fumbles. We don't have

00:34:43.670 --> 00:34:46.550
fumbles. At least not yet. Maybe someday. At

00:34:46.550 --> 00:34:48.570
least for now, he certainly misses. He's still

00:34:48.570 --> 00:34:50.010
unsteady. He goes and, like, tries to attack,

00:34:50.090 --> 00:34:51.969
and he slips into some pangolin blood as he gets

00:34:51.969 --> 00:34:54.690
in the range and slides and wipes the air and

00:34:54.690 --> 00:34:56.889
almost takes off the ear of the orc next to him.

00:34:56.949 --> 00:34:59.050
So right now, the orc and the bandit are basically

00:34:59.050 --> 00:35:01.090
facing all of you grouped up together. The pangolin

00:35:01.090 --> 00:35:03.210
shot off into the woods and is currently running

00:35:03.210 --> 00:35:05.210
as fast as it can away. It probably isn't coming

00:35:05.210 --> 00:35:06.969
back. It's super injured. Now we're going to

00:35:06.969 --> 00:35:09.309
wipe up. You are wiping these guys. I thought

00:35:09.309 --> 00:35:14.400
I was going to get you. Well, that's the game,

00:35:14.400 --> 00:35:17.340
and the bandit sucks, and it is now Stump's turn.

00:35:17.780 --> 00:35:25.539
Oh. Emonrath. Emonrath is ready to roll. So here's

00:35:25.539 --> 00:35:26.840
you right here. You're 10 feet away from the

00:35:26.840 --> 00:35:28.679
bandit, 10 feet away from the orc. You got these

00:35:28.679 --> 00:35:30.000
guys in front of you, but you could still move

00:35:30.000 --> 00:35:31.780
up in their space, attack, and step back if you

00:35:31.780 --> 00:35:34.619
want, or you can move around to get next to the

00:35:34.619 --> 00:35:36.420
bandit and attack, whatever you want to do. I

00:35:36.420 --> 00:35:39.579
guess my question is, how's Chester doing? Chester's

00:35:39.579 --> 00:35:43.099
in rough shape. Yeah, but do I have an ability

00:35:43.099 --> 00:35:45.679
to help him? I don't believe you do. You don't

00:35:45.679 --> 00:35:50.400
have any healing on your side. You're just getting

00:35:50.400 --> 00:35:52.219
there, do some damage. You got utility, you got

00:35:52.219 --> 00:35:55.019
damage. The best way to help Chester is to get

00:35:55.019 --> 00:35:57.300
these guys out of a fight. We're going to rely

00:35:57.300 --> 00:36:00.820
on you for offense this time. Got it. I would

00:36:00.820 --> 00:36:05.039
like to cast a Zephyr Strike on me and go for

00:36:05.039 --> 00:36:10.360
the orc. So you guys just see like... I love

00:36:10.360 --> 00:36:11.300
this, too, because you're going to move through

00:36:11.300 --> 00:36:15.699
their spaces really smoothly and easily. Zebulon,

00:36:15.719 --> 00:36:17.460
you must be dorking out when you see Emonrath

00:36:17.460 --> 00:36:20.719
just cast this magic over himself. I think a

00:36:20.719 --> 00:36:23.360
light wind covered his body. You see his form

00:36:23.360 --> 00:36:25.420
almost become so hazy, like a heat wave. Oh,

00:36:25.440 --> 00:36:27.679
my God. He's doing it. He's doing it. You just

00:36:27.679 --> 00:36:30.980
kind of dance past Jules and Chester, easily

00:36:30.980 --> 00:36:33.059
sliding between them, sliding up next to the

00:36:33.059 --> 00:36:36.800
orc. In fact, you can get behind the orc. and

00:36:36.800 --> 00:36:40.320
give everyone a plus two bonus for flanking.

00:36:40.820 --> 00:36:42.599
You can give it to Jules. So if you want to do

00:36:42.599 --> 00:36:45.000
that, that's yours. But yeah, you're there. Do

00:36:45.000 --> 00:36:46.619
you want to attack? That was a bonus action.

00:36:47.500 --> 00:36:50.119
I do. Let's attack. That's going to be a d20

00:36:50.119 --> 00:36:56.659
roll. Rolled a four. Ooh, do you have a modifier?

00:36:58.469 --> 00:37:00.949
So that's going to miss. It's a plus four. So

00:37:00.949 --> 00:37:02.210
it's going to innate total. It's going to miss.

00:37:02.289 --> 00:37:04.710
But I will tell you with Zephyr Strike, once

00:37:04.710 --> 00:37:07.449
you can actually do a 1d8 damage for free, even

00:37:07.449 --> 00:37:10.010
when you miss. You only get to do it once. It's

00:37:10.010 --> 00:37:11.710
basically you just like swing in the wind. Once

00:37:11.710 --> 00:37:14.309
for the whole life of the spell? Yes. Gotcha.

00:37:14.449 --> 00:37:16.150
Yeah, but when you swing, it's like the wind

00:37:16.150 --> 00:37:18.070
comes off your blade and strikes anyway. So the

00:37:18.070 --> 00:37:20.869
orc like sort of moves it aside and dodges it.

00:37:20.909 --> 00:37:23.150
But do you want to use the wind attack? Or do

00:37:23.150 --> 00:37:25.269
you want to save it? Let's do it. Okay. Roll

00:37:25.269 --> 00:37:31.250
me this right here. Get a six. All right. Nice.

00:37:31.389 --> 00:37:34.730
I love this. So you guys watch free damage. You

00:37:34.730 --> 00:37:36.769
guys watch. It's so it's so samurai. You guys

00:37:36.769 --> 00:37:41.869
watch as like swings up right behind this orc

00:37:41.869 --> 00:37:43.630
and goes to like slut and the orc just kind of

00:37:43.630 --> 00:37:46.309
like parries the blow probably brings their axe

00:37:46.309 --> 00:37:48.889
up and kind of knocks to the side smiles and

00:37:48.889 --> 00:37:52.170
you guys see like this big. slit, like, open

00:37:52.170 --> 00:37:54.550
up on her body where the blade didn't touch.

00:37:54.610 --> 00:37:57.250
Like, right down her collarbone, down, like,

00:37:57.250 --> 00:37:59.789
to her chest, and just, like, burst with blood,

00:37:59.849 --> 00:38:02.489
and she just looks down at it in shock and looks

00:38:02.489 --> 00:38:05.849
up at Shu like, that didn't connect. She says,

00:38:05.969 --> 00:38:10.050
what? And, uh, that's your turn. You keep saying

00:38:10.050 --> 00:38:12.250
nerding out, and Zebulon is nerding out. He's

00:38:12.250 --> 00:38:15.690
like, you must have learned that from Ogin. This

00:38:15.690 --> 00:38:20.119
orc is nerding out over that one. Holy shit.

00:38:20.340 --> 00:38:23.219
Speaking of nerding out, Zebulon, that is your

00:38:23.219 --> 00:38:29.159
turn now. Zebulon is with this new rider. What

00:38:29.159 --> 00:38:32.659
race is the rider? The rider is human. Okay.

00:38:32.960 --> 00:38:39.059
Looks like he's a local subsunkin. Subsunkin?

00:38:39.980 --> 00:38:46.679
Subsunkin. So Zebulon and Emin are flanking this

00:38:46.679 --> 00:38:49.900
new human rider. You are. You are flanking the

00:38:49.900 --> 00:38:52.960
human. So yeah, the way it's set up, Emonrath

00:38:52.960 --> 00:38:54.579
is now making it so you're flanking the human

00:38:54.579 --> 00:38:57.460
and Jules, you're flanking the orc. Emonrath

00:38:57.460 --> 00:39:00.400
has perfectly strategically positioned himself

00:39:00.400 --> 00:39:04.039
to annihilate me. Yeah, which is fantastic. That's

00:39:04.039 --> 00:39:06.400
a plus two on everyone's rolls. Against everyone.

00:39:06.559 --> 00:39:09.079
Stomp is great at tic -tac -toe three in a row.

00:39:11.239 --> 00:39:14.340
So Zeb's going to take a swing at this new combatant,

00:39:14.380 --> 00:39:18.929
this new human rider. He's going to take... two

00:39:18.929 --> 00:39:22.489
swings with his sabers and because this human

00:39:22.489 --> 00:39:27.289
rider is also in melee with uh i think that's

00:39:27.289 --> 00:39:29.889
jewels or is that chester uh either way he's

00:39:29.889 --> 00:39:31.650
in melee with both so he's gonna get sneak attack

00:39:31.650 --> 00:39:34.449
damage on top of yeah yeah it's true so let me

00:39:34.449 --> 00:39:36.550
take uh i mean he's technically a melee within

00:39:36.550 --> 00:39:38.429
melee range of everybody he's in the middle of

00:39:38.429 --> 00:39:43.420
your like star Ooh, that first attack's only

00:39:43.420 --> 00:39:46.199
a nine, so I'm guessing that's not a hit. That

00:39:46.199 --> 00:39:47.880
is not going to be a hit. But he gets a second

00:39:47.880 --> 00:39:51.840
attack here. A second attack. That's only a 12.

00:39:52.679 --> 00:39:55.559
So, Zebulon, you're over there, and I think you're

00:39:55.559 --> 00:39:58.719
just like, you just saw how cool Eminrath was.

00:39:58.840 --> 00:40:01.389
You get a little overexcited. And just start

00:40:01.389 --> 00:40:03.150
swinging wildly at these two. Missed them both.

00:40:03.409 --> 00:40:07.030
And you just, yeah, barely. 12 was super, super,

00:40:07.070 --> 00:40:09.090
super, super close. Yeah. Where I think this

00:40:09.090 --> 00:40:11.110
guy just barely managed to, like, push his head

00:40:11.110 --> 00:40:12.210
out of the way. And you almost got, like, you

00:40:12.210 --> 00:40:14.590
know, a cut right on his face. And he, you know,

00:40:14.590 --> 00:40:17.130
slides out of it. But, yeah, you're just, you're

00:40:17.130 --> 00:40:19.610
hung up on how cool Menrath is. That's, yeah.

00:40:19.610 --> 00:40:21.550
You're, like, on the spot. You see he's across

00:40:21.550 --> 00:40:23.030
from you now. He's looking at you. And you're,

00:40:23.090 --> 00:40:25.710
like, oh, yeah, I got to be cool. And then you're

00:40:25.710 --> 00:40:29.099
just kind of, like, wop, wop. That's it. Focus.

00:40:29.659 --> 00:40:35.480
Focus. I'm sorry. I'm a rat. Don't you get it?

00:40:36.059 --> 00:40:39.380
No, I don't. Got more important things right

00:40:39.380 --> 00:40:41.579
now. Focus. Oh, my gosh. All right. I missed

00:40:41.579 --> 00:40:43.460
both strikes. What a bummer. I don't have any

00:40:43.460 --> 00:40:46.860
other moves. That's it for Zeb this round. All

00:40:46.860 --> 00:40:50.519
right. I have to. I have to. I have to do some

00:40:50.519 --> 00:40:55.159
stuff with this orc. I get gross. Stealth with

00:40:55.159 --> 00:40:59.360
the orc. Stuff. Not stealth. Stuff. Against Emonrath,

00:40:59.440 --> 00:41:01.460
because he attacked me. Emonrath, I'm coming

00:41:01.460 --> 00:41:04.739
for you now. Come at you hard and fast. Strong.

00:41:04.960 --> 00:41:09.400
Relax. Here we go. You're scary. Come at me.

00:41:09.400 --> 00:41:14.539
That's an iffy one. That is going to be a 13

00:41:14.539 --> 00:41:19.659
to hit. No, 14 to hit. Okay. And I have your

00:41:19.659 --> 00:41:22.949
AC. It's a 15. I know, you asked a good question.

00:41:23.269 --> 00:41:25.329
I looked at Stomp, and I was just like, oh, wait,

00:41:25.369 --> 00:41:27.989
hang on. Never mind. I have your sheet. I have

00:41:27.989 --> 00:41:33.050
the answer to that question. So, just, I think

00:41:33.050 --> 00:41:36.170
the axe comes down at Emonrath, and again, just,

00:41:36.230 --> 00:41:38.329
like, so cool, with the barest movement, you

00:41:38.329 --> 00:41:40.329
just kind of, like, barely slide out of the way.

00:41:40.369 --> 00:41:41.929
I think, like, maybe a little bit of your hair

00:41:41.929 --> 00:41:45.570
gets, like, nicked off at the very edges. But,

00:41:45.630 --> 00:41:48.670
yeah, this orc is furiously swinging. My goons

00:41:48.670 --> 00:41:54.300
are not holding. Up. It has Chester. Okay. Yeah.

00:41:55.019 --> 00:41:56.780
So wait, Chester's got flanking, right? On the

00:41:56.780 --> 00:41:59.619
orc? Chester is not flanking anyone, actually.

00:41:59.619 --> 00:42:02.260
He's the only one not flanking. He's right here

00:42:02.260 --> 00:42:05.099
in the middle. He's right in between Jules and

00:42:05.099 --> 00:42:07.980
Zebulon. Add a character. Chester also has 3

00:42:07.980 --> 00:42:10.800
HP. Yeah, he does. Could disengage. Get him out

00:42:10.800 --> 00:42:13.039
of there. Scary stuff. Scary stuff. Something

00:42:13.039 --> 00:42:16.280
to consider. I know. Jules, what do I do? He's

00:42:16.280 --> 00:42:18.619
looking at you like trying to... He's waiting

00:42:18.619 --> 00:42:21.179
for you to say so. Can he disappear again for

00:42:21.179 --> 00:42:27.780
a while, just for safety? Goddamn. We haven't

00:42:27.780 --> 00:42:30.760
gotten any damage on that human, have we? No.

00:42:31.039 --> 00:42:36.659
Not yet. No. It's a gamble. It's a gamble. He's

00:42:36.659 --> 00:42:39.239
going to disengage, and just for flavor, Jules

00:42:39.239 --> 00:42:40.519
is going to be like, Chester, step back for a

00:42:40.519 --> 00:42:42.840
minute. Step back. Get behind us. And I'm going

00:42:42.840 --> 00:42:44.880
to push Chester. All right, Jules. I'm going.

00:42:44.980 --> 00:42:47.719
Well, I'm pushing him kind of behind me. Okay.

00:42:47.760 --> 00:42:49.639
So you're just sliding. I'll say he goes right

00:42:49.639 --> 00:42:52.440
here. Basically diagonally behind you and away

00:42:52.440 --> 00:42:54.579
from everybody else. It's just the orc and this

00:42:54.579 --> 00:42:58.460
rider, right? Yes. Yeah. Okay. And you know that

00:42:58.460 --> 00:43:01.000
at this point, if the orc is to go after Chester,

00:43:01.119 --> 00:43:04.099
she's stepping. And she's stepping also out of

00:43:04.099 --> 00:43:06.320
M and Rath's range. So, like, bad stuff happens.

00:43:06.420 --> 00:43:09.800
They're getting AOs. AOs. So, yeah. Chester moves

00:43:09.800 --> 00:43:12.349
behind you. It's like. Get her, Jules! Get her!

00:43:13.130 --> 00:43:16.610
And with that, it is the pangolin's turn, and

00:43:16.610 --> 00:43:19.449
he screams and keeps running. Wait, can Chester

00:43:19.449 --> 00:43:22.349
pull out his sling? You know what? Actually,

00:43:22.469 --> 00:43:24.570
I'm not going to just keep running. I'm going

00:43:24.570 --> 00:43:25.909
to roll my check again, because I get to roll

00:43:25.909 --> 00:43:28.010
a check at the top of this round, right? To fight

00:43:28.010 --> 00:43:30.710
Dissonant Whispers? It doesn't say. Oh, so you

00:43:30.710 --> 00:43:33.469
can probably just blast one round then. So as

00:43:33.469 --> 00:43:36.289
the creature doesn't move on obviously dangerous

00:43:36.289 --> 00:43:39.679
grounds, let's fight Pit. On a successful save,

00:43:39.739 --> 00:43:42.300
I think you have to save. You might have to save

00:43:42.300 --> 00:43:47.559
every round. Okay, I'll save. It's not great.

00:43:47.639 --> 00:43:50.260
That is a five. Nope. Okay, so it just keeps

00:43:50.260 --> 00:43:53.000
running. All right, goodbye, Pangolin. It looks

00:43:53.000 --> 00:43:55.420
back like it really wanted to go back and make

00:43:55.420 --> 00:43:57.900
the fight more interesting, and then it was like,

00:43:58.019 --> 00:44:00.019
nah, nah, my will's not strong enough, and he

00:44:00.019 --> 00:44:02.539
just leaves. That's good. That's awesome. That's

00:44:02.539 --> 00:44:05.179
a good thing. Stumps up into the jungle. I was

00:44:05.179 --> 00:44:07.440
going to go after that Zebulon, but I won't.

00:44:08.219 --> 00:44:11.139
Who went off to pee again, I think. I'm pretty

00:44:11.139 --> 00:44:19.139
sure he just did. We need to keep a Steven pee

00:44:19.139 --> 00:44:22.739
counter for every episode. So that we can have

00:44:22.739 --> 00:44:25.820
contests to see who will guess right about how

00:44:25.820 --> 00:44:28.199
many times he goes pee. You should roll the limit.

00:44:29.760 --> 00:44:34.039
You can only do 11. You got to camel up, you

00:44:34.039 --> 00:44:36.519
know, for hiking and for tabletop. You got to

00:44:36.519 --> 00:44:40.400
camel up. That's right. Hydrate. Camel up. Hydrate

00:44:40.400 --> 00:44:45.280
hard. Oh, man. You know who's not hydrating hard?

00:44:46.119 --> 00:44:49.219
Your orc. Fucking Jules LaRoche. It's his turn.

00:44:49.900 --> 00:44:52.639
Jules, what do you want to do? I'm going for

00:44:52.639 --> 00:44:54.940
the orc. All right, go for the orc. I got that

00:44:54.940 --> 00:44:56.579
plus two, right? Get that plus two, and I hate

00:44:56.579 --> 00:45:01.369
it. So, question. Yeah. Buttons are pre... Yes,

00:45:01.429 --> 00:45:03.949
buttons are pre -roll. Okay. This fight's not

00:45:03.949 --> 00:45:05.690
over yet. This orc looks pretty tough. Pretty

00:45:05.690 --> 00:45:08.090
injured. Fuck. Pretty tough. I'm going to give

00:45:08.090 --> 00:45:10.369
you a damn button. Okay, I'll take that. I'll

00:45:10.369 --> 00:45:12.889
take that button. It's my own little mini victory

00:45:12.889 --> 00:45:16.389
here. I don't know. I'll see for a crit. See

00:45:16.389 --> 00:45:19.050
if you get a crit. Yeah, so I just got... What's

00:45:19.050 --> 00:45:22.789
my modifier? Yeah, so that's a 19. A 19 will

00:45:22.789 --> 00:45:25.570
hit. And a 13. Okay, well that 19's definitely

00:45:25.570 --> 00:45:26.929
going to hit. Go ahead and roll damage. Steven,

00:45:27.010 --> 00:45:38.199
how was your tinkle? Much needed. Gosh. That's

00:45:38.199 --> 00:45:41.840
a three. Three, okay. Your turn happened while

00:45:41.840 --> 00:45:44.739
you were gone. We skipped you. I'm just kidding.

00:45:45.000 --> 00:45:46.440
I was going to say, I'm pretty sure I was at

00:45:46.440 --> 00:45:49.420
the opposite end of the order. Yeah, that's true.

00:45:49.780 --> 00:45:52.659
Three damage on the order? Yep. Okay. I picked

00:45:52.659 --> 00:45:58.030
my timing wisely. I'm still up. All right. Time

00:45:58.030 --> 00:46:02.909
for my human to go. Pumped up bandit. What am

00:46:02.909 --> 00:46:04.510
I going to do with this guy? Let's see here.

00:46:05.530 --> 00:46:12.630
Yeah, I'm going to go for Zebulon here. I can't.

00:46:13.250 --> 00:46:16.090
Why? I've not rolled above a 10 once, I feel

00:46:16.090 --> 00:46:18.250
like. Except for one crit with minimum damage

00:46:18.250 --> 00:46:24.949
almost. Does an 11 hit Zebulon? It does not hit.

00:46:24.969 --> 00:46:29.019
Wow. This is shocking. Team Rocket's blasting

00:46:29.019 --> 00:46:33.360
off again. Emonrath, you're up. You're watching

00:46:33.360 --> 00:46:36.119
these flailing guys. You're within range of both

00:46:36.119 --> 00:46:39.460
the orc and the human, and you get flanking bonus

00:46:39.460 --> 00:46:42.739
on both of them. So you already used that spell,

00:46:42.800 --> 00:46:44.420
but you can still just go for straight normal

00:46:44.420 --> 00:46:46.980
attacks. Can I use that button for an attack?

00:46:47.320 --> 00:46:49.400
You can, yeah. Use that, and then you basically

00:46:49.400 --> 00:46:51.800
just roll twice, take the higher, and make sure

00:46:51.800 --> 00:46:55.059
you hit. Okay. I'm going to do that. I'm going

00:46:55.059 --> 00:46:57.820
to roll twice. It's a plus four on these attacks.

00:46:58.219 --> 00:47:01.079
Eagle, sir. Thank you, sir. Button back. Thank

00:47:01.079 --> 00:47:08.460
you, stump. First roll. It's a six. That won't

00:47:08.460 --> 00:47:11.260
work, but use that button. So roll again. Get

00:47:11.260 --> 00:47:13.920
that second roll. Exactly, yep. Here we go. Sweaty

00:47:13.920 --> 00:47:17.360
hands. Sweaty hands. Sweaty hands. Oh, I don't

00:47:17.360 --> 00:47:21.139
know about that. It looks like a 19 to me. It's

00:47:21.139 --> 00:47:26.599
a 19. That's going to hit. Nice button use right

00:47:26.599 --> 00:47:29.460
there. That's worth it. Who are you attacking?

00:47:30.260 --> 00:47:33.280
The orc. The orc, okay. Go ahead and roll this

00:47:33.280 --> 00:47:37.360
for damage. That's six plus two. That's eight

00:47:37.360 --> 00:47:40.159
damage total. Eight damage, okay. So what was

00:47:40.159 --> 00:47:42.780
left for the orc? I need you to do me a favor,

00:47:42.840 --> 00:47:44.989
actually, real quick. Okay, sure. Can you describe

00:47:44.989 --> 00:47:51.230
to me how you kill this orc? Yes! Well, let me

00:47:51.230 --> 00:47:54.090
tell you how I did this. I snuck through the

00:47:54.090 --> 00:47:56.809
barriers of individuals, and I pulled out my

00:47:56.809 --> 00:48:01.550
long blade, and just at one moment, when the

00:48:01.550 --> 00:48:05.590
slice through the neck, the prior slice of the

00:48:05.590 --> 00:48:09.829
neck happened, I come in behind, and I take my

00:48:09.829 --> 00:48:12.769
blade, and I swing it straight through the top.

00:48:12.829 --> 00:48:18.769
Oh, hell yeah. Hopefully trying to cut my adversary

00:48:18.769 --> 00:48:24.869
in half. We shall see. Yes. To finish this because

00:48:24.869 --> 00:48:31.730
I have to get to the valley. We have shit to

00:48:31.730 --> 00:48:33.809
do, so we're going to cut people in half until

00:48:33.809 --> 00:48:38.659
we get there. That's the intention. This orc

00:48:38.659 --> 00:48:40.900
was already, like, off guard with you. I mean,

00:48:40.920 --> 00:48:44.179
you just did some crazy shit last round, slicing

00:48:44.179 --> 00:48:46.420
her without even touching her with a blade. As

00:48:46.420 --> 00:48:48.380
you go into that, I think she's not sure how

00:48:48.380 --> 00:48:50.599
to guard against it. She, like, goes, and that's

00:48:50.599 --> 00:48:52.400
kind of, like, I think what that button is, is

00:48:52.400 --> 00:48:54.300
she, like, kind of goes to block, but she's almost,

00:48:54.360 --> 00:48:56.460
like, expecting some other phantom attack, and

00:48:56.460 --> 00:48:58.000
she, like, whirls her weapon around the wrong

00:48:58.000 --> 00:48:59.820
way. You see an opening, and in that instant,

00:48:59.860 --> 00:49:05.599
you go flying in for her torso, and... Cut right...

00:49:06.840 --> 00:49:09.099
Faked her out. And you see this, like, she just

00:49:09.099 --> 00:49:11.219
kind of looks at you and just is like, now I

00:49:11.219 --> 00:49:22.539
remember. And she just falls to the ground, gushing

00:49:22.539 --> 00:49:25.619
blood all over the road. Dies trying to roll

00:49:25.619 --> 00:49:31.059
her R's. I can't roll dice. I can't roll R's.

00:49:31.059 --> 00:49:34.989
I am not rolling anything tonight. That's brilliant.

00:49:36.289 --> 00:49:39.429
And with that, it's you, Zebulon. The orc is

00:49:39.429 --> 00:49:42.730
gone. Pangolin is gone. Just the human left.

00:49:42.789 --> 00:49:47.610
He's just like, uh, uh. He's looking around,

00:49:47.730 --> 00:49:49.510
doesn't know what to do. Weapon out, just like,

00:49:50.010 --> 00:49:52.929
get back. Yo, I'm warning you. All right, well,

00:49:53.130 --> 00:49:56.610
Zebulon's going to end this. Zebulon's going

00:49:56.610 --> 00:50:01.630
to take his two swings with both sabers at this

00:50:01.630 --> 00:50:04.730
human. I'm going to turn in my button, too. Oh,

00:50:04.750 --> 00:50:07.570
shit. I want to wreck this guy. Okay, give me

00:50:07.570 --> 00:50:09.989
that button. I'm not really playing nice here.

00:50:10.730 --> 00:50:13.590
I'll gladly take it. And he's within five feet,

00:50:13.690 --> 00:50:16.670
so if he hits, he gets sneak attack damage. So

00:50:16.670 --> 00:50:18.510
I'm going to roll twice for the first swing.

00:50:20.769 --> 00:50:24.829
Good thing, because that's a 12 plus five, so

00:50:24.829 --> 00:50:27.889
17 for the first strike. That hits. Good thing

00:50:27.889 --> 00:50:30.329
I rolled with advantage, because the first one

00:50:30.329 --> 00:50:35.079
was a two. Oh. That's one of my rolls. Ooh, second

00:50:35.079 --> 00:50:37.099
roll's a nat one. That one is not going to hit.

00:50:37.099 --> 00:50:39.539
Okay, that one does not. It actually negates

00:50:39.539 --> 00:50:42.139
your first roll. That isn't quite how it works.

00:50:42.179 --> 00:50:45.380
And you owe me three buttons. Oh, man. So what

00:50:45.380 --> 00:50:49.400
I'm going to do instead is roll my d8 plus three,

00:50:49.460 --> 00:50:51.420
and then I'm going to roll a d6 on top of that

00:50:51.420 --> 00:50:53.559
for sneak attack damage. Oh, shit. You roll your

00:50:53.559 --> 00:50:56.599
giant damage. So that's eight for the first die,

00:50:56.699 --> 00:51:00.010
five plus three. Eight damage total? For the

00:51:00.010 --> 00:51:02.590
first die. Then I have a D6. Should I roll the

00:51:02.590 --> 00:51:06.429
D6? Roll your D6. I think you're so cool. That's

00:51:06.429 --> 00:51:09.429
an extra three. I see you scratching out a lot

00:51:09.429 --> 00:51:11.969
of things. This is the bandit's HP. Currently.

00:51:12.250 --> 00:51:14.469
I see lots of numbers, but they're all scratched

00:51:14.469 --> 00:51:17.789
out. Yeah, there's a bunch of scribbles and numbers

00:51:17.789 --> 00:51:20.110
under the scribbles. Okay. Well, I scribbled

00:51:20.110 --> 00:51:21.369
those up so you wouldn't see the numbers. Anyway,

00:51:21.449 --> 00:51:23.670
the bandit had an 11, and you just rolled 11

00:51:23.670 --> 00:51:26.349
damage exactly. Oh, sweet. Excellent. Yeah, the

00:51:26.349 --> 00:51:28.269
bandit was not terribly strong because he was

00:51:28.269 --> 00:51:31.510
supposed to be riding a fucking pangolin. That

00:51:31.510 --> 00:51:34.369
didn't happen. So, yeah, how do you kill this

00:51:34.369 --> 00:51:37.230
guy? Perfectly killed this guy exactly in one

00:51:37.230 --> 00:51:39.650
attack. In the confusion of the fight, Zebulon

00:51:39.650 --> 00:51:43.630
just fully extends, stretches straight out, and

00:51:43.630 --> 00:51:47.510
just pokes this guy right in a soft spot and

00:51:47.510 --> 00:51:51.369
sends him to the ground. Okay. All right. This

00:51:51.369 --> 00:51:59.199
guy just, like, drops. Cringing. And just writhes

00:51:59.199 --> 00:52:02.519
on the ground and dies below your blade. Gross.

00:52:03.119 --> 00:52:06.260
And, you know, it's funny because in superhero

00:52:06.260 --> 00:52:09.679
stories, they usually don't murder everyone.

00:52:10.079 --> 00:52:11.440
I mean, you didn't really give me the option

00:52:11.440 --> 00:52:14.800
to like. Non -lethal exists. I mean, you don't

00:52:14.800 --> 00:52:15.980
have to use it. I'm just saying. I'm just putting

00:52:15.980 --> 00:52:18.409
it out there. I penalize non -lethal anyway,

00:52:18.590 --> 00:52:19.789
so you don't always want to use it. Yeah, right.

00:52:19.869 --> 00:52:22.269
I was going to say, like, it's way harder. It's

00:52:22.269 --> 00:52:23.909
harder. I just manage non -lethal. That's what

00:52:23.909 --> 00:52:26.849
I do, because it makes no sense. They were using

00:52:26.849 --> 00:52:28.869
lethal force, so we were using lethal force.

00:52:28.969 --> 00:52:31.230
I'm not judging you. I'm just pointing out a

00:52:31.230 --> 00:52:33.469
fact that usually Batman doesn't fucking stab

00:52:33.469 --> 00:52:35.289
people in the guts, in the kidneys, and watch

00:52:35.289 --> 00:52:37.309
them bleed out and scream on the ground while

00:52:37.309 --> 00:52:39.809
looking at them with soulless eyes that wonder,

00:52:39.889 --> 00:52:42.710
just wonder if maybe he's starting to enjoy it

00:52:42.710 --> 00:52:45.289
just a little. Hold on. Are you playing my character,

00:52:45.409 --> 00:52:49.380
or am I? If I were playing your character, there'd

00:52:49.380 --> 00:52:55.960
be a lot less blood on your hands. Anyway. Anyway,

00:52:56.099 --> 00:52:58.900
this guy drops. So Zebulon turns to the humans

00:52:58.900 --> 00:53:02.039
who are still on the map, or have they fled?

00:53:02.739 --> 00:53:06.460
They're still there. Did she steal anything from

00:53:06.460 --> 00:53:09.639
you? Are you folks okay? Oh, she was trying to

00:53:09.639 --> 00:53:12.320
blame us for that. It must have been some kind

00:53:12.320 --> 00:53:15.019
of car, and you saved us. We were going to fork

00:53:15.019 --> 00:53:18.139
over. We didn't know what to do, but when we

00:53:18.139 --> 00:53:19.480
saw you coming, we thought for sure you were

00:53:19.480 --> 00:53:22.179
going to take her side. But we didn't do anything.

00:53:22.219 --> 00:53:24.260
We swear, we came by, and the door just opened

00:53:24.260 --> 00:53:26.679
on its own, and the pangolins ran into the woods,

00:53:26.719 --> 00:53:28.280
and she came out screaming at us. Don't worry,

00:53:28.320 --> 00:53:30.440
don't worry, don't worry. We believe you. You

00:53:30.440 --> 00:53:32.579
don't have to convince us, okay? Luckily for

00:53:32.579 --> 00:53:40.900
you, we killed them in cold blood. Wow, you must

00:53:40.900 --> 00:53:43.420
be luminaries. Wicked. You must be luminaries.

00:53:43.420 --> 00:53:46.420
You must be the heroes. So compassionate. So

00:53:46.420 --> 00:53:51.360
wonderful. I see my next apprentices. Yeah, you

00:53:51.360 --> 00:53:53.360
got to see some cool stuff at the end there,

00:53:53.380 --> 00:53:56.280
Minrath. Simeon, you might have proved yourself

00:53:56.280 --> 00:53:58.679
in the eyes of this guy. Yeah, that's what I'm

00:53:58.679 --> 00:54:01.260
thinking. Did Chester get any of this on film?

00:54:01.900 --> 00:54:06.280
Fantasy film? Chester's like... Ah, shit. I was

00:54:06.280 --> 00:54:08.460
covered in blood. Sorry, I got stabbed right

00:54:08.460 --> 00:54:10.360
in the pocket it was in. Yes, sir. Yeah, I was

00:54:10.360 --> 00:54:12.079
trying to record it, and it's... In front of

00:54:12.079 --> 00:54:14.739
Eamon Rash. Are you serious? Yeah, all I got

00:54:14.739 --> 00:54:19.199
is red. I heard. You might hear it. This... This

00:54:19.199 --> 00:54:24.340
was my chance. Eamon, I'm so sorry. I... It's

00:54:24.340 --> 00:54:27.260
okay. It's okay. You actually remind me of when

00:54:27.260 --> 00:54:32.400
I was a wee little lad. Wow. Suckling upon the

00:54:32.400 --> 00:54:39.260
goats up on the silver mountains. I'm a little...

00:54:39.260 --> 00:54:43.219
When my world was turned upside down. I'm a little

00:54:43.219 --> 00:54:47.320
less excited about that part, but... I think

00:54:47.320 --> 00:54:50.619
Jules and Chester both turned around and... But

00:54:50.619 --> 00:54:54.400
I'm really glad that you were impressed. I think

00:54:54.400 --> 00:54:56.400
there's potential. I think there's potential.

00:54:56.840 --> 00:54:59.599
Are you okay? Is everybody... I mean, I'm very

00:54:59.599 --> 00:55:03.380
slashed. That reminds me, yeah. I'm going to

00:55:03.380 --> 00:55:05.420
cast Cure Wounds on Chester. All right, sweet.

00:55:05.929 --> 00:55:08.150
Good call. Good spell. I don't think I have any.

00:55:08.170 --> 00:55:12.150
What was it? 1d6? 1d8. 1d8? Modifier. Modifier,

00:55:12.190 --> 00:55:15.469
hell yeah. Which is just my charisma. That's

00:55:15.469 --> 00:55:17.050
really the only option we have for healing, so

00:55:17.050 --> 00:55:18.349
when or if we get to... It's four. Same as before.

00:55:18.449 --> 00:55:21.610
It's four. Literally the last time that I did

00:55:21.610 --> 00:55:23.869
Cure Wounds on Chester, it was that roll. Thanks

00:55:23.869 --> 00:55:26.730
again, 5 -0. It was four. Thanks again. Shut

00:55:26.730 --> 00:55:30.309
the fuck up, Chester. Sorry, Jules. But now you

00:55:30.309 --> 00:55:32.429
go and heal him. He's like, oh, thanks, Jules.

00:55:32.570 --> 00:55:34.989
I was losing a lot of blood there. That thing

00:55:34.989 --> 00:55:37.969
scratched me good. When or if we ever get to

00:55:37.969 --> 00:55:41.190
Sipsenko, we should pick up some potions. You

00:55:41.190 --> 00:55:43.389
are all in Sipsenko. You're just not at the Densing

00:55:43.389 --> 00:55:45.269
Night Market yet. The Densing Night Market, then.

00:55:45.349 --> 00:55:48.309
Fine. You're off with tourists like this, you

00:55:48.309 --> 00:55:51.869
know? I don't know. I've never been here, so...

00:55:51.869 --> 00:55:56.530
All right. Yeah, so you're... These two people

00:55:56.530 --> 00:55:58.630
actually start wandering over to you, and the

00:55:58.630 --> 00:56:01.150
wife kind of stays behind, almost like scared,

00:56:01.250 --> 00:56:03.010
covering her face, and there's a lot of gore

00:56:03.010 --> 00:56:06.250
and stuff, but the husband begins moving over

00:56:06.250 --> 00:56:08.590
to you, and he just looks at you like, you all,

00:56:08.750 --> 00:56:12.030
and you came to our rescue. You slayed these

00:56:12.030 --> 00:56:16.349
criminals. Are you, by chance, are you all luminaries?

00:56:16.869 --> 00:56:20.510
Well, I mean, he is. And Zeb points to him in

00:56:20.510 --> 00:56:27.469
wrath. Yes, yes, I am. You are? Yes. I feel like

00:56:27.469 --> 00:56:31.530
I know you. What's your handle, sir? My handle

00:56:31.530 --> 00:56:37.650
is eminrath. Ah, eminrath, yes. Perfect. I saw

00:56:37.650 --> 00:56:42.409
you on... The Citadel Network. What is the show

00:56:42.409 --> 00:56:47.210
I made up called again? Eminrath Hour? Smart

00:56:47.210 --> 00:56:51.030
and humble. Jewels. Jewels. Something jewels.

00:56:51.210 --> 00:56:54.340
Daily jewels. The Morning Jewel. Morning Jewel.

00:56:54.400 --> 00:56:55.960
I saw you on The Morning Jewel. That's the one.

00:56:56.179 --> 00:56:58.260
Yes, yes, yes. I always watch it and remember

00:56:58.260 --> 00:57:01.719
its name every day. It's a fun show. It's fun.

00:57:02.119 --> 00:57:08.780
With the host. You know. Foo Bon May. Foo Bon

00:57:08.780 --> 00:57:11.280
May. Hey, there you go. Actually, here's a little

00:57:11.280 --> 00:57:12.860
tidbit for you guys, and this is on purpose.

00:57:14.380 --> 00:57:16.440
She is the mother of another luminaire we've

00:57:16.440 --> 00:57:19.239
mentioned in the show, Foo Lilling, the teapot

00:57:19.239 --> 00:57:22.159
mage. Oh, dude. With like the coolest. Way to

00:57:22.159 --> 00:57:25.039
cast magic. Yeah. So that's why the Foo surname.

00:57:25.260 --> 00:57:26.559
You know, a freaking teapot. Are you kidding

00:57:26.559 --> 00:57:29.019
me? It's pretty cool. So cool. I like that one.

00:57:29.340 --> 00:57:32.639
So, yeah, so they're talking you up. And you

00:57:32.639 --> 00:57:35.139
two, I mean, you're heroes as well. You fought

00:57:35.139 --> 00:57:38.860
bravely. What's your name, sir? So we can spread

00:57:38.860 --> 00:57:40.960
tales of you back at the Citadel. And the name's

00:57:40.960 --> 00:57:45.050
Jules. Jules. Any surname? Just Jules. All right,

00:57:45.050 --> 00:57:47.110
Jules, yes. I mean, there might be a lot of those,

00:57:47.190 --> 00:57:51.050
but I'll make sure to spread it. Jules, the raggedy

00:57:51.050 --> 00:57:55.750
man. Raggedy Jules. All right. And you, child

00:57:55.750 --> 00:57:57.610
who got stabbed really hard and kind of fell

00:57:57.610 --> 00:57:59.750
out of the fight, what's your name? I'm Chester.

00:57:59.989 --> 00:58:04.530
All right. Chester, he's supposed to be the camera

00:58:04.530 --> 00:58:07.489
guy. Oh, so you're like a sidekick to these two

00:58:07.489 --> 00:58:10.750
non -luminaries. I mean, if you want to be reductive,

00:58:10.750 --> 00:58:14.440
yeah, I guess. I don't know. Sure? So, Chester,

00:58:14.619 --> 00:58:18.659
just this time. You know what, Zebulon? Get that

00:58:18.659 --> 00:58:21.019
diamond up. Why don't you record me doing something

00:58:21.019 --> 00:58:22.760
cool? Well, you don't do anything cool. Like

00:58:22.760 --> 00:58:27.780
this. And he flips you off. Oh, hang on. Let

00:58:27.780 --> 00:58:29.940
me get that on camera. Ah, here we go. Record.

00:58:30.260 --> 00:58:32.719
Yeah, got it. Now you figured it out, huh? Yeah.

00:58:33.460 --> 00:58:39.239
Is this new friendship already fracturing? It's

00:58:39.239 --> 00:58:41.460
just a unique dynamic. It's just a unique dynamic.

00:58:41.880 --> 00:58:44.380
They turn to you and they're like, so we want

00:58:44.380 --> 00:58:46.780
to spread your name across this island. You.

00:58:47.039 --> 00:58:48.860
We saw what you did there at the end. That was

00:58:48.860 --> 00:58:51.539
brilliant. What's your name, sir? Spreading tails,

00:58:51.719 --> 00:58:56.400
huh? Sir Dragon, you look familiar. Perhaps we

00:58:56.400 --> 00:59:02.139
know you from somewhere. Careful. Yes. You might

00:59:02.139 --> 00:59:06.000
know me. You certainly know me as Zebulon. Zebulon.

00:59:06.199 --> 00:59:11.110
But I think... From now on, maybe you'll know

00:59:11.110 --> 00:59:20.530
me as Zebulon Black. Zebulon Black. Zebulon.

00:59:22.269 --> 00:59:25.750
Zebulon Black. Hey, that sounds pretty cool,

00:59:25.769 --> 00:59:27.829
huh? I like the sound of that. You're coming

00:59:27.829 --> 00:59:32.250
into your own. Did you get that, Chester? I actually

00:59:32.250 --> 00:59:34.690
did. I was still flipping you off in camera,

00:59:34.769 --> 00:59:36.869
though. So the little finger's kind of covering

00:59:36.869 --> 00:59:39.119
your face a little. It's not so bad. It sounded

00:59:39.119 --> 00:59:42.619
pretty cool. Thank you. I don't think it's showing

00:59:42.619 --> 00:59:45.559
on the Crystal Network, though. It's kind of,

00:59:45.559 --> 00:59:48.179
I mean, it's a little adult theme now. It's kind

00:59:48.179 --> 00:59:50.000
of crude. If we blur out a middle finger, does

00:59:50.000 --> 00:59:52.460
it still showcase as a middle finger? I mean,

00:59:52.480 --> 00:59:54.119
people will still know. Yeah, right? It doesn't

00:59:54.119 --> 00:59:56.739
make any difference. That's what I figured. It's

00:59:56.739 --> 00:59:58.239
almost like there's no point in doing it at all.

00:59:58.300 --> 00:59:59.539
Right? Because everybody knows what's there.

00:59:59.679 --> 01:00:02.179
It makes sense. Oops. We can get the audio. Cut

01:00:02.179 --> 01:00:11.260
it. Put it in the trailer. We'll give it to Jeremy.

01:00:11.300 --> 01:00:13.079
He'll do something really cool. Give it to Jeremy.

01:00:15.940 --> 01:00:19.420
Yes. All right. So I don't want to drag this

01:00:19.420 --> 01:00:22.179
scene out any longer than it has to be. I mean,

01:00:22.199 --> 01:00:24.460
you finished my fight way too fast, so drag away.

01:00:24.820 --> 01:00:33.360
Well, my intention was to secure and search these

01:00:33.360 --> 01:00:37.340
brigands and then search their cargo. This is

01:00:37.340 --> 01:00:38.860
actually a very interesting situation, right?

01:00:39.320 --> 01:00:42.239
You go and look at their cargo. And in this wagon

01:00:42.239 --> 01:00:44.860
right now, all you see is just an empty wagon

01:00:44.860 --> 01:00:48.039
with, like, a bunch of, like, pangolin feed on

01:00:48.039 --> 01:00:49.639
the inside. And then you realize there's a bunch

01:00:49.639 --> 01:00:52.079
of pangolins, like, swarming all around the wagon,

01:00:52.139 --> 01:00:54.780
kind of looking at you with these sad, black,

01:00:54.780 --> 01:00:58.300
beady eyes and looking over at the people he

01:00:58.300 --> 01:01:00.320
just took out. And, like, they were criminals.

01:01:00.760 --> 01:01:04.659
These were their pets. So Zebulon's going to

01:01:04.659 --> 01:01:07.579
grab a bag of the feed and walk over to the two

01:01:07.579 --> 01:01:11.800
humans. And hand it to them. For them to take

01:01:11.800 --> 01:01:16.260
over care? So, I know that these pangolins were

01:01:16.260 --> 01:01:19.199
going to be used to rob you, but I think they're

01:01:19.199 --> 01:01:22.360
pretty innocent. They could probably use somebody

01:01:22.360 --> 01:01:28.960
good. Somebody like you. To watch out for them

01:01:28.960 --> 01:01:31.659
and care for them and maybe show them that...

01:01:31.960 --> 01:01:34.500
There's more to life than crime. I'm sorry. Are

01:01:34.500 --> 01:01:37.340
you trying to give me 20 pets? That's like asking

01:01:37.340 --> 01:01:39.400
someone to take 20 cats. Well, yeah, but look

01:01:39.400 --> 01:01:41.360
at all the feed that's here. You've known me

01:01:41.360 --> 01:01:44.380
for 30 seconds. Yeah, but you could... There's

01:01:44.380 --> 01:01:47.480
like at least a month. I have a whole life. Or

01:01:47.480 --> 01:01:50.320
two weeks. I might have a lot of kids. I don't.

01:01:50.440 --> 01:01:52.860
Honestly, we're actually extremely... Kids love

01:01:52.860 --> 01:01:55.340
pangolins. We're extremely lonely and we take

01:01:55.340 --> 01:01:58.079
these touristy trips to fill the void that our

01:01:58.079 --> 01:01:59.440
marriage... Aren't you going to the night market?

01:02:00.730 --> 01:02:02.690
Our marriage was shattered years ago and our

01:02:02.690 --> 01:02:04.769
daughter drowned. Joe, how about this? We've

01:02:04.769 --> 01:02:06.349
been searching desperately for something else

01:02:06.349 --> 01:02:08.070
to fill the void in our heart and we realize

01:02:08.070 --> 01:02:10.909
right now that 20 pangolins is the exact size

01:02:10.909 --> 01:02:13.190
of the void that is missing between us. Darling,

01:02:13.449 --> 01:02:16.510
I love you. And the wife's just like, I love

01:02:16.510 --> 01:02:18.929
you. And they just, they're like, I don't know.

01:02:19.670 --> 01:02:21.849
So hold on, hold on. Are they taking the pangolins?

01:02:21.889 --> 01:02:22.989
Because if they're not taking the pangolins,

01:02:23.070 --> 01:02:24.449
I think we could take them to the night market

01:02:24.449 --> 01:02:26.469
and sell them. That's true. I'm going to say

01:02:26.469 --> 01:02:27.610
they're not going to take the pangolins because

01:02:27.610 --> 01:02:29.619
that's a crazy ask. That was all non -canon.

01:02:29.619 --> 01:02:32.199
They just look at you like, I'm really sorry.

01:02:32.280 --> 01:02:35.579
I could take one or two, but we have no way to

01:02:35.579 --> 01:02:38.219
store these. I don't think they should be split

01:02:38.219 --> 01:02:41.460
up. I mean, look at them. They're all so attached

01:02:41.460 --> 01:02:45.199
and I assume valuable. They're actually generally

01:02:45.199 --> 01:02:47.699
considered to be like somewhat sacred here on

01:02:47.699 --> 01:02:50.780
Sbsunko. They're seen as... Oh, great. Yeah.

01:02:51.880 --> 01:02:54.579
We're just trying to give them away. Does Eamon

01:02:54.579 --> 01:02:57.719
have like a citadel card or anything like that?

01:02:57.780 --> 01:03:00.679
He can charge up a lifetime supply of food for

01:03:00.679 --> 01:03:03.380
these two? Like if you commit to taking these

01:03:03.380 --> 01:03:05.880
pangolins, then we will provide you with food.

01:03:06.139 --> 01:03:09.280
But in return, when we call you for service,

01:03:09.340 --> 01:03:13.199
you will have to come. In our service. Whether

01:03:13.199 --> 01:03:16.980
it be a fight to the death or something of a

01:03:16.980 --> 01:03:21.559
lesser. For 20 pangolins. Hey, you never know.

01:03:22.219 --> 01:03:27.289
Yo, Eamon. Eamon, I think that we could still,

01:03:27.429 --> 01:03:31.590
you and I, we can rope Jules into a two. We could

01:03:31.590 --> 01:03:34.530
take these pangolins to the night market and

01:03:34.530 --> 01:03:36.869
we could sell them. They'll go to good homes,

01:03:37.050 --> 01:03:41.289
I think. I mean, how do you make sure of that?

01:03:41.530 --> 01:03:43.829
Am I here? Am I in this conversation? Well, I

01:03:43.829 --> 01:03:46.929
mean, we would just sell them to, I don't know,

01:03:46.929 --> 01:03:51.289
Eamon knows people, right? No, I think we'd go

01:03:51.289 --> 01:03:54.719
to like a... place that sells pets. What do you

01:03:54.719 --> 01:03:57.340
think, Eamon? I think it's a good idea, but this

01:03:57.340 --> 01:04:00.539
is not my mission here, so I will rely upon you

01:04:00.539 --> 01:04:04.960
to form this mission, this sub -mission. It is

01:04:04.960 --> 01:04:08.900
important, but I will not be present as I have

01:04:08.900 --> 01:04:12.860
missions upon this island to partake upon and

01:04:12.860 --> 01:04:19.460
pursue. He's got bigger fish to fry. Than 20

01:04:19.460 --> 01:04:23.170
homeless pangolins, yeah. It makes sense. Jules

01:04:23.170 --> 01:04:25.269
is going to take one. You're going to take one?

01:04:25.329 --> 01:04:27.590
Okay, yeah. I'm going to put them up on my shoulder.

01:04:28.389 --> 01:04:30.469
So you walk over, you reach down and pick one

01:04:30.469 --> 01:04:34.449
of these guys up. Yep. They're sad, but they're

01:04:34.449 --> 01:04:37.389
generally kind of friendly. At first it's kind

01:04:37.389 --> 01:04:39.429
of shivering as you pick it up. It's like shaking

01:04:39.429 --> 01:04:41.030
in your hands. You put it on your shoulder and

01:04:41.030 --> 01:04:42.590
it's still shaking for a second. And then after

01:04:42.590 --> 01:04:44.869
a moment it sort of stops. And you feel it just

01:04:44.869 --> 01:04:47.530
kind of like shove itself, its head into your

01:04:47.530 --> 01:04:49.909
neck. And you kind of like rub. And then it kind

01:04:49.909 --> 01:04:53.570
of calms and lies down. I'm going to call you

01:04:53.570 --> 01:05:01.409
Jamal. Jamal the pangolin. He kind of looks like

01:05:01.409 --> 01:05:03.510
Jamal, doesn't he? Yeah, he does. Jamal's got

01:05:03.510 --> 01:05:05.969
that big schnoz, you know, like an anteater.

01:05:06.809 --> 01:05:09.250
That's kind of mean, Jules. Jamal's going to

01:05:09.250 --> 01:05:12.550
kick my ass over this. Probably. Oh, man. Probably.

01:05:12.829 --> 01:05:17.030
Oh, nuts. He's crazy. We're all a little bit

01:05:17.030 --> 01:05:21.170
crazy, Chester. Does Chester still have the recording

01:05:21.170 --> 01:05:27.190
diamond out? No. Chester! What? Oh, yeah, sorry.

01:05:27.389 --> 01:05:30.429
Record. Are you doing something cool? I think

01:05:30.429 --> 01:05:32.090
we're just looking at fucking pangolins. I didn't

01:05:32.090 --> 01:05:33.949
think we needed to record this. Jules stepped

01:05:33.949 --> 01:05:38.090
out of the frame. Sorry, Jules. So, with these

01:05:38.090 --> 01:05:40.210
pangolins behind him, Zebulon steps over to the

01:05:40.210 --> 01:05:44.590
humans and starts to grab one of their hands

01:05:44.590 --> 01:05:47.130
and tries to shake their hand. Staring at the

01:05:47.130 --> 01:05:50.300
camera, though. Yeah, exactly. Yes. He's staring

01:05:50.300 --> 01:05:52.820
straight at the camera while he's trying to shake.

01:05:52.880 --> 01:05:54.460
He would sort of be followed like, why are you

01:05:54.460 --> 01:05:56.760
not looking at what's happening? This is great.

01:05:56.940 --> 01:05:59.500
This is great. Just keep. How long do I have

01:05:59.500 --> 01:06:03.159
to do this for? This footage is going to get

01:06:03.159 --> 01:06:07.960
us in so much trouble. So much trouble. All right.

01:06:07.980 --> 01:06:10.139
That's good. That's enough, Chester. That's one.

01:06:10.280 --> 01:06:12.500
That's it. That's good. All right. Stop. Did

01:06:12.500 --> 01:06:14.340
you get the pangolins behind me? Were they real

01:06:14.340 --> 01:06:20.670
sad? I look pretty sad. Awesome. Yeah, I got,

01:06:20.690 --> 01:06:23.730
like, that dead guy's foot, too, so it kind of

01:06:23.730 --> 01:06:25.230
explains the story if you really pay attention.

01:06:26.929 --> 01:06:30.650
Well, are you guys, to the humans, Zebulons speaking,

01:06:30.889 --> 01:06:34.150
are you guys all set here? I think we're... Yes,

01:06:34.150 --> 01:06:36.630
we're heading back to the Citadel. We've had

01:06:36.630 --> 01:06:38.869
enough excitement for this little adventure.

01:06:39.269 --> 01:06:42.750
We're going back. There should be another ruby

01:06:42.750 --> 01:06:44.650
coming in tonight, so we're going to take that

01:06:44.650 --> 01:06:47.340
out. That's good. Good for you. We're going to

01:06:47.340 --> 01:06:49.460
keep. And Zebulon points the other direction.

01:06:49.559 --> 01:06:51.179
We're going to go that way. All right, well,

01:06:51.239 --> 01:06:53.599
enjoy the night market. It's incredible. We've

01:06:53.599 --> 01:06:56.019
been there a few times now, and it won't really

01:06:56.019 --> 01:06:58.519
start bustling until the sun sets, as they say.

01:06:58.659 --> 01:07:02.320
You see the laupop flowers gleaming in the mountains.

01:07:02.340 --> 01:07:05.780
You'll know the time. When the forest comes to

01:07:05.780 --> 01:07:09.059
light and life, you'll see the same in the night

01:07:09.059 --> 01:07:12.880
market. And the preferred spots to check out?

01:07:13.260 --> 01:07:17.139
Yes, there's the Zonggun Family Seafood. They're

01:07:17.139 --> 01:07:20.119
an excellent vendor of all seafood items. They're

01:07:20.119 --> 01:07:23.900
rather huge. And, of course, there's the Tien

01:07:23.900 --> 01:07:26.179
Mo Noodles. If you enjoy noodles, if you have

01:07:26.179 --> 01:07:28.960
a penchant for that, they're the best around.

01:07:29.500 --> 01:07:31.699
Other large franchises that are starting to branch

01:07:31.699 --> 01:07:35.579
out a little bit. Apart from that, oh, you know,

01:07:35.659 --> 01:07:39.460
actually, if I remember correctly, tonight they're

01:07:39.460 --> 01:07:42.159
actually running the market games. If you're

01:07:42.159 --> 01:07:44.889
interested in... checking those out. Oh, well,

01:07:44.949 --> 01:07:47.650
many of the sort of businesses here in the market,

01:07:47.710 --> 01:07:51.210
they try to set up these challenges for off -worlders

01:07:51.210 --> 01:07:53.309
who want to take part and essentially become

01:07:53.309 --> 01:07:55.670
part of the community by earning their place

01:07:55.670 --> 01:07:58.289
through exciting games. They'll usually have

01:07:58.289 --> 01:08:00.849
teams challenge each other in them. It's quite

01:08:00.849 --> 01:08:03.909
something. What kind of games? Well, let's see.

01:08:04.619 --> 01:08:06.880
It changes every time, but generally speaking,

01:08:07.079 --> 01:08:09.119
there might be the Battle Prawn Challenge. We

01:08:09.119 --> 01:08:10.940
always love watching the Battle Prawn Challenge.

01:08:11.639 --> 01:08:18.020
Or like Giant Shrimp Prawns? Oh, yes, yes. You

01:08:18.020 --> 01:08:19.819
have to beat them into submission and cook them.

01:08:20.279 --> 01:08:22.100
And you're battling another team for quality

01:08:22.100 --> 01:08:26.399
and speed. Oh, it is thrilling. There's the Spicy

01:08:26.399 --> 01:08:30.300
Pepper Challenge. That's a rough one. I hope

01:08:30.300 --> 01:08:32.420
you have a high constitution modifier, because

01:08:32.420 --> 01:08:36.520
that is... Oh, deadly if you don't. It sounds

01:08:36.520 --> 01:08:39.539
like we're starting to build a ramen challenge.

01:08:42.079 --> 01:08:46.039
Prawns and spicy peppers. Made for the market

01:08:46.039 --> 01:08:49.300
folk, you know, the owners. They like to basically

01:08:49.300 --> 01:08:51.239
host a challenge pertaining to their own stall.

01:08:51.460 --> 01:08:55.079
And if you pass them all, then, well, you're

01:08:55.079 --> 01:08:57.539
in for a treat. I mean, they'll treat you like

01:08:57.539 --> 01:08:59.180
one of them. A big bowl of ramen. Like some good

01:08:59.180 --> 01:09:05.569
deals. And that. I can't say where else there

01:09:05.569 --> 01:09:08.090
is, but please, you should check it out if you're

01:09:08.090 --> 01:09:10.630
there tonight. It's really quite exciting. Only

01:09:10.630 --> 01:09:12.550
happens once every couple months. Well, I don't

01:09:12.550 --> 01:09:15.369
know about you guys, but I'm starving. Sounds

01:09:15.369 --> 01:09:17.810
a little interesting. That they need reservations?

01:09:20.390 --> 01:09:22.029
Well, normally you have to sign up beforehand,

01:09:22.050 --> 01:09:24.550
but to be honest, the challenges aren't exactly

01:09:24.550 --> 01:09:26.850
pleasant. We don't usually see a lot of people

01:09:26.850 --> 01:09:28.729
signing up. Hopefully they actually run them

01:09:28.729 --> 01:09:31.270
tonight. Otherwise, locals have to fill the spots,

01:09:31.289 --> 01:09:33.609
and that's never as fun as seeing an off -world

01:09:33.609 --> 01:09:36.510
or a luminary. Well, he looks at you and says,

01:09:36.529 --> 01:09:38.729
a couple would -be luminaries, take them on.

01:09:39.750 --> 01:09:44.890
We certainly have built up an appetite for competition

01:09:44.890 --> 01:09:49.039
after slaughtering these highwaymen. What do

01:09:49.039 --> 01:09:52.939
you fellas think about throwing our names into

01:09:52.939 --> 01:09:56.859
the ring, competing in these night games? What

01:09:56.859 --> 01:10:01.659
about all these pangolins? These are gold. Are

01:10:01.659 --> 01:10:07.859
the pangolins coming to dinner? So Zebulon grabbed

01:10:07.859 --> 01:10:12.199
a sack of the pangolin feed and slung it over

01:10:12.199 --> 01:10:15.310
his shoulder. trying to coax the pangolins. Like

01:10:15.310 --> 01:10:17.909
cut a tiny hole so it's dropping bit by bit as

01:10:17.909 --> 01:10:19.329
you're walking and they're just following the

01:10:19.329 --> 01:10:21.090
line and it's like a horde of pangolin following

01:10:21.090 --> 01:10:24.550
you. I mean, yeah, I'm down with that. Me too.

01:10:24.850 --> 01:10:26.750
So you know about these games? I think these

01:10:26.750 --> 01:10:29.710
two older folk, they sort of bid you farewell.

01:10:29.850 --> 01:10:31.229
They're like, well, we really should be going.

01:10:31.449 --> 01:10:34.409
My darling wife, we need to get her somewhere

01:10:34.409 --> 01:10:37.789
we can sit down and calm her emotions. This has

01:10:37.789 --> 01:10:40.130
all been so much for her. She doesn't look well.

01:10:40.329 --> 01:10:44.220
Oh, no. Miss, please. Take a seat. It's okay.

01:10:44.579 --> 01:10:48.060
There's nowhere to sit. Yeah, I mean, there's

01:10:48.060 --> 01:10:50.939
in the wagon, but there's at least a little bit

01:10:50.939 --> 01:10:52.680
of blood. I'm too traumatized. We're going to

01:10:52.680 --> 01:10:56.920
leave now. And they leave. They take off down

01:10:56.920 --> 01:11:02.479
the path, and you are left, I guess, with this

01:11:02.479 --> 01:11:04.079
horde of pangolins you're going to string along

01:11:04.079 --> 01:11:07.779
with feed. Yes. I think that's fun enough. Sure,

01:11:07.920 --> 01:11:11.100
you poke a hole and you're... I take one, Zebulon

01:11:11.100 --> 01:11:13.439
takes them all. Yeah, you have one on your shoulder,

01:11:13.500 --> 01:11:15.659
still nuzzling against you. Zebulon, all the

01:11:15.659 --> 01:11:17.279
other ones are kind of like following you, nipping.

01:11:17.619 --> 01:11:19.520
It's going to be slow going, but hey, you know

01:11:19.520 --> 01:11:21.340
what? You have all day, apparently. So if you

01:11:21.340 --> 01:11:22.939
want to take your time and like move with this

01:11:22.939 --> 01:11:24.779
horde, they're going to be like nipping as they

01:11:24.779 --> 01:11:26.899
go at the ground. So it's, you know, not super

01:11:26.899 --> 01:11:30.380
fast, but yeah. So you guys start to move towards

01:11:30.380 --> 01:11:33.500
the town. And I think you know, Eminrath, that...

01:11:33.979 --> 01:11:37.260
Once you reach there, your duty is to continue.

01:11:37.340 --> 01:11:39.140
You might have to turn around, keep patrolling

01:11:39.140 --> 01:11:41.079
the highway, make sure this does not happen again,

01:11:41.220 --> 01:11:43.239
keep your eye on the town itself. So this might

01:11:43.239 --> 01:11:45.520
be pretty soon where you part ways with this

01:11:45.520 --> 01:11:48.199
wacky group of adventurers that you've met. Yes,

01:11:48.260 --> 01:11:52.420
it's anticipated. It was written before the times.

01:11:52.720 --> 01:11:57.800
Yes, it is what it is. You mean you're not going

01:11:57.800 --> 01:12:02.359
to eat hot chili peppers with us? I have high

01:12:02.359 --> 01:12:05.659
faith in you. Both of you, that you will do the

01:12:05.659 --> 01:12:08.659
right thing tonight. And those penguins will

01:12:08.659 --> 01:12:13.340
find a fine home. And we will meet again. Yes.

01:12:13.979 --> 01:12:16.960
Yes, and hopefully I'll have a blue ribbon at

01:12:16.960 --> 01:12:19.979
the hot pepper eating contest. And I think I

01:12:19.979 --> 01:12:22.039
can give you a run for your money there. Ooh,

01:12:22.560 --> 01:12:25.439
a challenger. A little friendly competition on

01:12:25.439 --> 01:12:29.939
top of the friendly competition. You're on, Jules

01:12:29.939 --> 01:12:37.890
Giroux. Last one there is a crusty toe. And with

01:12:37.890 --> 01:12:40.829
that... We're going to work on that. We're going

01:12:40.829 --> 01:12:42.970
to work on your expressions. With that, we are

01:12:42.970 --> 01:12:45.869
Zebulon. Last of theirs, a Krathiko or whatever.

01:12:45.949 --> 01:12:48.369
And you just start running down the road. You

01:12:48.369 --> 01:12:50.569
have this bad pangolin horde behind you. Juzelro

01:12:50.569 --> 01:12:52.949
just shaking his head or something. Chester's

01:12:52.949 --> 01:12:55.289
just like rolling his eyes, you know, flicking

01:12:55.289 --> 01:12:57.529
the diamond in the air. And then we're out to

01:12:57.529 --> 01:12:59.550
stand behind them, just looking cool, kind of

01:12:59.550 --> 01:13:02.550
staring down the way. I think we freeze frame

01:13:02.550 --> 01:13:05.270
on this moment. And we call it there.
