Hey, fans, people. It's Jeremy. You all kick
ass. That's all I wanted to say. Enjoy the show.
Yes, I know, I know. Alarms are blaring, the
citadels' fences are activated, and yes, there
is an emergency happening in Diorama. I know.
From what we've gathered, a small clan of storm
giants have wandered into the capital city of
Calabay and are causing a bit of ruckus. We don't
know what they're after, and I'm sure there's
a perfectly reasonable reason that the local
party did not see this coming. More on that later.
And yes, I know. Storm giants, walking disasters,
unimaginable power, the stuff of pure nightmares.
I know. But listen, don't panic. Don't even sweat.
The shield -bearers are rallying as we speak,
and there are a number of celestials posted right
bang in Calipay. Everything is going to be fine.
On top of that, our sources tell me that everyone's
favorite heartthrob hero, Handsome Jai, just
departed on the Serpent and Jewel before news
broke of the attack. Surely, with Jai on the
scene as well, the matter will be settled shortly.
As we all know, when push comes to shove, he's
steady as stone. You just said a phrase really
interesting. What's that? I forgot what it was.
Bing bang. It was like the bang. Right bang on
Calipay. Yeah, right bang on Calipay. I like
highlighting Rune being different from Orin.
Like every past traumatic event that's happening,
Orin's been like empathetic and like right out
there and like feeling it. And Rune's just like,
nah, it's cool. Sweep it under the rug. Everything's
fine. Chill. It's all good. Yeah. Fuck you, Rune.
Keep on carrying on. So any fans of the Zelda
series out there might be aware of the Oracle
games. I'm wrapping up this thing. Hang on. Chill.
Give me that side -ass, Steven. We'll give you
some room. Oracle of Ages and Oracle of Seasons.
They were Zelda titles that released kind of
like Pokemon games, and they both came out simultaneously.
It was almost like a red version and a blue version.
But the difference between them and Pokemon games
is they are totally different games from each
other. And they combine story, and they both
sort of focus on different aspects of the classic
Zelda game formula. Ages was all about the puzzles,
and Seasons was all about the sort of combat
and the adventuring. So one of my first forays
into fantasy at all, gaming, fantasy, any of
that, was picking up Oracle of Ages for my Game
Boy Color when I was a wee lad. And to this day,
I will always, always love those titles. The
idea of splitting the focus and mastering the
two opposed sides of this, you know, this wonderful
franchise was always so damn enchanting to me.
And that has inspired this little idea of mine.
Up to this point in the show, I've leaned hard
on my preferred style of running this game. What
I and other podcast fans might refer to as the
Dimension 20 style, as among other things. Basically,
it's a system of pacing where every few episodes
of role play, we have a combat. And usually it's
kind of a big grand affair. It's a grid map.
We try to get all chunky with it. We push the
players. And we don't have a lot of combats.
But the ones that do happen, they're big story
ones. They matter. And this way, we have a pretty
free gameplay that transitions to pure chunk
when we hit the combat. You and chunky. Chunk.
It's been a week. That's my D &D comfort zone.
Right there. And we are throwing that comfort
out the window for a while because I want to
be a little crazy. You're nuts, David. These
next two arcs are going to be our fancy pants
Oracle games. Two entirely different arcs focused
on two entirely different aspects of what makes
D &D great. Things that I never really go whole
hog into and I'm a little nervous doing it like
this. The world of Senza will mostly be a pure
grid map dungeon crawl. In the world of Dialogon,
we played fully. in theater of the mind. And
I really hope this isn't going to be bad. I want
to get weird. I want to get weird. I like to
experiment sometimes, you know? Fingers crossed.
Fingers crossed. We want to see, at the end of
this, when we get to our next Unzipped, I really
want to hear you guys' takes on what you're going
to enjoy. Because I think, personally, I think
Steven Rodriguez here is going to hate Theater
of the Mind, and he's going to absolutely dig
the really chunky grid -based map. And I think
Jeremy Wolf is going to be the opposite. I think
you're going to take the Theater of the Mind
like a moth to a flame, and you're going to be
like, this big old grid map affair. You know,
where's my cool theater of the mind? Well put.
Well put. Thank you. I think you're right. I'm
trying to go into it with an open mind. Yeah,
you have to. That's in the name. But yeah, I'm
really excited for this because it's going to
be weird and uncomfortable in some ways. But
I don't know. This is going to be... Crazy. When
we get to the grid map, oh my gosh, just you
wait to see what Rochelle cooked up for us. It's
going to be a minute before we get to other party
because right now we have a situation to deal
with and it's insane. And I'm hoping tonight
we can hit the ground running and really show
off the strengths of Theater of the Mind where
we can have, you know, you're not limited to
a map. You're not looking down at one surface
and saying, this is why I have to use this area.
My players, you know, my characters can't really
leave this map even though realistically I can
do anything because it's a game about anything.
You know, you can't just walk off that map because
then me as a DM will be like, ah! But hey, whatever
you want. You're going in a situation where obviously
this town is under some kind of attack. You see
one storm giant reaching into the gemstone right
before you. You don't know what else is going
on out there. You can stand and fight with one
dude. You can run around. You can hide somewhere.
You can just book it. You can save lives, preserve
lives, kill lives. This is all you. There is
no map now. You make it. I think if you embrace
it, you're going to have a lot of fun. And I
know I'm going to have a lot of fun because I'm
not pulling any punches. Theater of the mind,
grid map, I don't care. I'm going to kill your
characters. This is the first time I really believe
it. Yeah. I'm going to look at the CR for Storm
Giant real quick. Oh, okay. What are my abilities
again? All right. Anyway, probably should start
the episode, huh? I'm scared. You guys want to
do this? No. Hell yeah. Let's do this. Why do
I have to do this? We open up on the inside of
Handsome Jai's lamp, witnessing a scene that
occurred just a few hours ago. Yeah, you thought
I was going to get into it, guys? Ha! Ha! Trick
to you again. I'm waving the red flag. I'm a
bull tamer. You see how shocked I am? He's shocked.
We look inside handsome Jai's lap. This is some
time back, some hours ago, just after Jules left.
He left Jai with a choice, a quest before him.
As we look upon the scene, we see the long bar
sits empty beneath its wide variety of bottles
and kegs, the walls of... of this place are are
those of stone not sort of translucent like we've
seen it sometimes before but just pure isolated
stone walls around this uh uh this lounge is
a place of near silence apart from the sounds
of sickness from handsome jai who sits upon a
long couch his head hanging over an ornate jar
mesmerized sits beside him or pale fingers rubbing
slow circles into his back She wears her white
fur robe, decorated as ever with the yellow and
purple eye insignias of her people. Her own true
eyes are softer than we've ever seen them before,
staring into the shaking form of the fifth -ranked
luminary. And she speaks softly, too. You must
sober quickly. Kargar gave you this sample to
try out for such an occasion. I know it is not
pleasant, but the Toctins will be gone soon enough,
Jai. You will be clean. I don't want them to
be... Don't talk, fool man. Just listen to me,
okay? Jules, he is right. Something terrible
is coming for all of us, and I think at this
time we all do our part to stop it. Remember
what Trace told us? That Runer Song's blackmail
has been destroyed, all of it. We are free now.
Free to fight back. Free to step into the light.
Maybe this can be the first step of many more.
Maybe it is time to make a change. Jai. I can't.
You will not be alone. I can be with you every
step of the way. We hear a long moment of silence.
And then... Why? Why are you so nice to me? I
tortured you when we first met. I thought you
were an enemy. So why are you still here? Mesmer
just shrugs. I suppose I have a thing for big
hero types. I'm no hero. Look at me. You are
a hero, Jai. You've just forgotten for a while.
You... You don't know me. You don't know the
things I've done. The hell I've seen on Taib.
I can still hear. And he sort of moves to stand
up, to push towards the bar, fingers splayed
out, reaching for something, anything, and Yara
stands with him. She chases him and wraps her
arms around him, and we see him freeze. She presses
her face into his back, and I stand frozen as
she speaks. You're right. I will not lie. I don't
know you. I don't know what you've done or how
hard it has been for you. She turns him slowly
around to face her. But I do see you, and I can
see the man you really are behind the pain. And
Jai, shaking unsteady, his eyes look down to
his feet. How? Because, fool boy. And pale fingers
lightly push his chin up until his eyes meet
Yara's, and he can see the tears running to the
lips of her smile. I have my eyes on you. And
we return to the moment, to sudden hell. You
stare at the translucent walls of handsome Jai's
lair of love, to the serpentine carpenter jewel
in absolute... chaos. People stampeding over
each other, frantically trying to move away from
the sole exit to the world outside. In the storm
giant, a 25 foot tall monstrosity grinning at
the display of mass fear. You can see specks
of fresh blood splattering his white beard and
indigo skin. The door to the jewel slams fully
open as the creature grunts with slight effort
and reaches his hand in. The smoke surrounds
him, and more chaos, crackling thunder, breaking
masonry, and so much desperate screaming echoes
in from the world outside. Faced with all of
this, I imagine you don't notice, as Mesmerize
appears from invisibility and steps up beside
you all inside the lamp, watching in horror.
This... this is... And the chaos surrounding
you all blurs as a lamp rises up above the crowd.
and surges towards the reaching giant. Handsome
Jai is moving. Above you, you see Jai slamming
down a potion. You see like crackles of lightning
inside a blue -tinted bottle. And you watch his
muscles bulge immensely, veins of pulsing blue
energy appearing, spreading an indigo tint to
his own skin as well. You see he flies with full
ferocity into the unprotected face of the giant,
his leg kicking out with force and knocking the
creature back from the exit. The giant, Jai,
and all of you inside the vessel tumble out from
the Conqueror Jewel and into the battlefield,
Kalapang, the capital of Dyalangan. Jai still
flies there, delivers a follow -up attack on
the giant, each pushing the surprised creature
a few enormous steps back. With each move, the
chaos around you becomes ever clearer. Now give
me a moment, I'm gonna... I got a lot of chaos
to describe. You ready for this? You ready for
this? Open up those minds for that theater. Raise
those curtains. Here is the scene. Smoke rises
from shattered buildings. Fragments of pale masonry
scattered all around the dirt streets. Flames
look up from the cracks and gaps and broken red
rooftops. One such roof of a long, single -story
tavern caves in as a storm giant crashes through
it, falling with a groan. More such creatures
dot your vision, rising above the squat cityscape.
You see a cluster of three of them to the southwest,
great swords flashing as they lock blades with
a group of celestials. One raises a hand, and
a bolt of lightning cracks to humming existence
in its grip. It throws it through one of the
celestials, a pari, its blue skin cracked in
bleeding light, and the bolt rips through the
angel, and you watch it vanish with a violent
burst of light and a short, Another group of
two, male and female, seem to move unobstructed
through the city to the east. They laugh together
as their blades sweep the streets and structures
below and rise, dripping with gore. More crashing,
more screaming sounds in the south, the sight
of the source of these blocked by the conquered
jewel behind you. And high above everything,
a very different struggle. Dark storm clouds
obscure the sky, pouring rain over the small
city. And flying amidst them, backlit by flashes
of lightning, we see a long serpentine form.
It's hard to make it out, well, from so far below,
but you see distinct piscean features. fins shining
with an array of color all along the body and
standing up upon the head. You see the silhouette
of a wide open mouth lined with razor teeth.
You can see this mouth working as a voice resounds
through the sky, booming as if magnified by the
storm. Save him! This creature is the spitting
image of the frozen god. Of the plains of Arnikek
that you saw in the ice of the, uh, uh, the,
the, the, what are the calm? Crap. The windless,
the windless sea, the calm lake. There's a name
for it. It was cool. Oh. Uh, the ancient Drakon
you saw then. That, that beast, however, the
one you saw frozen in the ice was impossibly
huge. An unimaginable existence. A true deific
presence. This creature above you, surely the
last Bakunawa, a descendant of the old serpents,
is still maybe a hundred feet long. Larger even
than Sholei in her draconic form, though far
more slender. As it moves, so too do the storm
clouds. It seems to command them just as the
bones of its great ancestors have been known
to do. Other lights, like shooting stars, move
to engage with the monster, and you count four
of them, flying from different angles to intercept.
More celestials. As you look up, one of them
seems to break away from the pursuit, launching
down in your direction. Jai drops to the middle
of the dirt street, facing the rising storm giant.
He looks much like the creature now. Glowing
blue eyes, white hair, muscles bulging and massive,
energy seems to crackle through his veins. You
see his voice has changed too, as he boons out
a command to have... Release! Immediately, a
mist of color wraps around the lot of you, and
you are transported forcibly out of the lamp
and into the fray. Appearing in the street before
Jai, the giant just beyond him. Just behind you,
the serpentine jewel yet looms. In a city of
structures that only rarely rise to a second
story, the conquered jewel dwarves everything
around. You stand now at the base of the ramp
to its closing door, 30 feet away from the edge
of the gem. And 30 feet ahead of you, the crumbled
tavern stretching out to either side. The giant
rises from the rumble, eyes locked, glaring at
Jai. West of that structure looks through the
ruins of some kind of store. The rain dampening
the smoke pouring from it, yet the light of fire
can be seen from deep within the broken walls
that telltale glow. Then Jai turns to you to
speak, ignoring the chaos behind, the wind whipping
at you all. Storm Giants! The Celestials and
local defenses are overwhelmed. The Shieldbearers
will be mobilizing, but too many will die before
the situation is under control. We need to spread
out! I'll take those two to the east. Salome,
Jules, Arhalon, Gabriela, and Yara Ivanka, Mesmerize,
all stand in the street. Is there anything you
want to say? As you see Jai is about to, like,
mobilize. I have two immediate thoughts. Yeah.
Hell yeah. There's probably a lot of thoughts.
One, this is probably stupid. It's probably nothing.
It's just a thought. Can handsome Jai... put
somebody in the lamp against their will? No.
Like a storm giant? He can't do that, unfortunately.
Okay. I think that's cool. Figured I'd ask. Figured
I'd ask. Secondly, I really want to get to this
serpent and get... We can probably get Paul's
location out of this thing. Where is he? We can
save him if you tell us where it is. Only one
person needs to go up and do that and get the
answer. My immediate thought was Salome to fly
up there because she's a celestial and she could
ask him that. Damn. Just a thought. I mean, imagine,
it could be anybody else if only Emonrath didn't
have the Rod of Flying. Shut up, you. But, I
mean, I imagine it's got to know where he is.
If he's saying save him, he's very connected
to this. That's wild. I didn't even, you said
that there are, you said there are four Celestials
up there fighting it and one was coming down
towards us, though? Yeah, you see four lights
moving to intercept one, some turn to move down
and probably saw this. one giant on just sort
of moving uh without resistance against the conquer
jewel and realized there was a more pressing
matter to to push towards or even her just asking
another celestial where's the boy sure you know
um i think we can get answers from that okay
so there's there's the um Fly guy in the sky.
Jai is heading towards. Two giants to the east.
Yeah, these two are not locked in any combat.
They're just freely murdering down the street.
And there are three in front of us now? There
are three to the northwest. I read southwest.
That direction. Basically, those three are locked
in a heavy combat with a number of celestials.
It looks like they're kind of distracted. Right
now, you see only one in front of you. Okay.
Okay. Gotcha. It's standing up from the crumbled
remains of this tavern where it was just, like,
knocked into. It looks somewhat hurt. You see
a bit of, like, a purplish blood running down
from its mouth where Jaya struck it. Gotcha.
It's wounded. But it more looks mad than anything.
So Salome will hear Jaya's cry to split up, and
she'll look to Jules and tell him, Jules, I will
not split from you unless... Unless it is what
you think is best, I will follow your lead. I
will say, there is a gravity, a crackling static
presence emanating from the creature before you.
Okay. You might recognize a feeling of sheer
dread. This is something unlike anything you've
faced before. Now, you don't need to fight it
straight. You could just leave. The world is
your oyster. Can I ask, what does Salome know
about storm giants? I'm particularly very interested
in if storm giants are immune or whatever to
either thunder or lightning damage. That's super
important for Salome to try to figure out. For
storm giants, you can give me history or arcana.
Yeah, make a check. This is like you recalling
any knowledge you have. Anyone can make this
check. Okay. Intelligence, of course, being mine.
What are we rolling? History? History or Arcana?
Arcana, okay. Can I affect them with my Thunder
or Lightning damage? With a two minus two, Salome
has never heard of a Storm Giant. Yeah, same
with a five plus one. Two is a dozen of shit.
Yeah, you know, if you just overcharge them,
right? It's kind of like, they're so lightning
-y, if you put more lightning in them, they'll
probably just explode. Great, cool. It's like
a battery, right? Makes sense, yeah, it's like
a battery. What is our plan, Jules? Jules is
not going to leave this thing. He's not going
to leave all these people to die. Jules is planning
on fighting. But he turns to Salome. Salome,
can you fly up there? See if anybody knows where
Paul is. She looks straight up and she studies
the battle happening in the sky, noting the celestials.
We just need a location, then come back down
here and we fight. I will do that. But I won't
leave you alone. I think, like, hearing this,
Jai is, he's like... Already sort of half flying
away, he's like up in the air moving, and he
kind of turns back to you. Again, his veins are
crackling with whatever that potion was. Just,
do not lose sight of our objective. We are luminaries,
all. He kind of looks to you, Jules, for a moment,
nods. More than that, we're soldiers. Save everyone
you can. Don't you worry. We're fighting. He
nods, smiles, and just goes to turn away, and
you hear... Mesmer, Yara just shout out, Jai!
He stops for one second, doesn't really look
back, but just halts for a moment as she calls
after him. I see you. And you see him rocket
off over the cityscape. As he moves away, as
Salome begins to make a move, imagine upwards,
as you turn to face this giant sees him go and
just, you will run from me. He turns away from
Jai, seeing him moving towards his own certain
doom, towards those other two giants, and looks
to the rest of you. I will break you all. You.
His eyes lock on you, Salome, as you begin to
move. You! Winged Cretan! Your kind do not belong
on our world! You appear here with your laws
and your demands! We will suffer no more! The
sacred serpent has come to see your reckoning.
We will not miss the fun. We have risen from
the tides to smash all of the small folk and
to tear the wings off of you little birds. For
Starbreaker! You hear another giant face weathered
with age, rising up short ways beyond the crushed
tavern to the north. its eyes, lock on to its
screaming kin, fly, you know, pluck away to you,
Salome. He begins to char, scramming out a war
cry of his own. For Pond Hill! Roll for initiative.
All right. Let's fuck these giants up. Damn,
you said roll for initiative before I said, hey,
can Jules cast a spell? I know, I was like, yeah.
Once you cast a spell, it's like, oh, you're
basically already going to initiative. Yeah,
yeah. Also, oh, shoot. Sidekicks? Sidekicks.
I haven't had my sheets yet. Oh, yeah. So who
gets which sidekick? Yeah, I just looked. I don't
have Arhalon. You're Arhalon? Do you want Arhalon
or Gabriella? I don't know if I want the responsibility
of playing your girlfriend. Yeah. All right.
You take Arhalon. Okay. Because you'll probably
be better playing him than I am. I have at least
one way that I could maybe, like, play. off of
Arhalon, so I'm kind of excited to try that.
We'll see if I get a chance. Roll your initiatives,
write them down, and I'm going to do some Phenamelin.
All right. Let me Phenamel some high kicks on
these sheets. What's Gabrielle's modifier? That's
a good question. Add a high kick. Spent so much
time on prep and didn't do the one most important
thing. All right. Got sheets back up. I'm going
to roll Arhalons. Yes. Arhalon roll. Who knew?
Varhalon resplendentness. I believe it's black.
We've heard from Zila in canon, like adamantine
armor. There's some art being made of Varhalon.
Actually, right now, tonight, probably getting
colored in. As we speak. As we speak. Astropathic
Art on Instagram. Check it out. Check her out.
Some insane new stuff dropped. A crazy John Franklin
picture that's currently on my iPhone background.
All over the Discord, too. Yes, all over the
Discord. Get them all saved in there. You want
some cool pictures of our characters to put on
your phones and tape up to your wall and whatever
weird stuff. And I'll be better about posting
them, too. Yes, hell yeah. Sorry. Anyway, we
were rolling sidekick sheets. Yeah. What was
Gabrielle's modifier for? Four. It's dex. Oh,
it's four. Okay. It is her dex. Cool. So I got
a 13 for Salome and a nine for Arhalon. I got
a six for Gabriela. Oof. And a three for Jules.
Oh, double oof. Jules rolled a natural one. Holy
crap. And he's got a plus two. For his initiative.
Ouchy mama. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You're like, Jules
is about to make a move, and he's just like,
horse of Gauss, what's that? All the trauma flashes
back, slows you down. No, fuck that. Gabriela
says, wait. Actually, stay close to me. And she
kind of puts a hand down. Watch out for that
horse. She's gone full, like a secret service
mode around you right now. Just crouched down
low, getting ready to fight. And with that. Oh,
boy. Vanishes. Hell yeah. And that's her turn.
And now it's going to be that storm giant, the
one incoming. There's one farther away. It's
going to take him a minute. You just see him.
You're going to hear the concert. He's charging
down the street. Boom, boom. Smashing through
structures, buildings like they're nothing. Just
full juggernauting over to you. There's one closer
to you that you've got to deal with. Tell me.
You're already taken to the sky. I'm going to
say you started flying. I'm not going to say
you're on the ground. I was going to say she's
in that cool. Like, superhero pose. Do you want
to be in that pose? I mean, just for the theatrics
of it, but not for the mechanics of it. You want
the cobblestone to explode when you jump up?
Yeah, exactly. Right. You told me, are you in
the air or are you on the ground? It's going
to decide what I do. Ooh. God damn it. I want
to be in the air. All right. You did the cool
thing. The ground's already exploded. Okay, cool.
There's rubble flying up on you. Crater beneath
her. And you're, boom. Full crater. So I... All
right, yeah. And you're, boom, zooming up. See,
you get into the theater of the mind. You can't
do craters on a grid map. Makes no sense. You're
locked in the air, and this creature you see
sees you there, grabs a piece of rubble from
the ground behind it, and full hooks it towards
you. Oh, awesome. Other hand grabs the second
one and hooks it as well. Oh, twice. Yeah, baby.
We caught you twice. What? You're in trouble.
Holy shit. You ready for this? No. You ready
for this? Still no. Hang on. I made a goof. I
only have one. I realized I pulled up, for some
reason, the 2025, 2024 Stormdry and Snap logs,
and I'm like, no, no, those are... I'm not balanced
in this game. I'm getting nerfed. I'm actively
getting nerfed right now. So we're going to zoop
back over to the right stone giant stat block
and now I'm going to beat you up. So here we
go. Here comes a rock. A single one. Not the
highest roll. Crap. Well, a 22 hit? I knew it
was going to be like... Yeah, 22 hits. Wonderful.
Alright, hang on, let me do a bunch of math.
So much math. There's a limit to how big my numbers
can get in my head. This is rolling. Is that
a D12? Turquoise die here. I haven't whipped
these guys out in a while, so this is pretty
fun. It fucking is a D12. I should have done
some Bardics while we were still in the game.
You just ran a fourth D12, I think. I'll just
add to that real fast. Stop. I can't survive
4D12. What the fuck? Okay. Hey, not too bad.
Okay. That is 37 points of bludgeoning damage.
You just go to move and this full boulder crashes
into you. You just feel this unimaginable pain,
this force ripping through. I imagine as you
get hit, Salome, almost like cracks form into
your body and light, like prismatic light begins
to flow out as you are sent that much closer
to your home plane, to being brought back to
the plane of Kameo, that outer world of light.
You feel this thing crash. against you. You were
sent sort of sprawling in the air, probably holding
your spot. In fact, you know what? You're in
the air. You just get by a rock. I need you to
roll for me something. I need you to roll for
me acrobatics or athletics. Your choice. You're
such a dick. To see if you're going to go with
the rock. A three. Fucking hell. You go to make
that move. You see that monster up ahead, Pong,
ill, moving. information you might need out of
your reach your hand outstretched and this pain
rips through you you feel bones cracking breaking
if that's how celestials work discord me if it's
not and you go tumbling back down to the ground
to the ground yeah fuck so We're fighting one
of these right now. There's a second one coming
towards us. There's two to the east. There's
three to the southwest. Jai's got those two.
And then there's still a boss monster in the
sky. Welcome to Chaos Land. Hey, you're using
that imagination really well. Are you scared?
Yeah. Boom, that's imagination, baby. That is
my turn, though, and that's going to be you,
Salome. The other one is going to take the turn.
gets closer and closer. Salome hits the ground
and rolls and rolls and rolls and finally catches
herself and looks towards the storm giant with
a hand up and casts a spell. And she calls out
to Arhalon. Arhalon, be the next hit. And she's
going to cast Guiding Bolt. On the frost, not
the frost giant, storm giant. Hell yeah. Oh,
that's a 18 with a plus nine. So like a million
and a half. That's going to hit. Okay, great.
So that's, let me see here. 4d6 radiant. Give
me that radiant. You see Arhalon is locked in.
He just hears these words, nods, positions himself
to move. And he's, those old shield bear instincts
fully kicking in. His orange eyes sort of locked
on this creature. Just 12. Just 12? Radiant.
Hey, 12 is not nothing. As this bolt slams into
it, you see it begins to light up around the
wound, almost drawing in Arhalon's attention.
His eyes sort of focus on that now. He looks
emboldened. Anything else you want to do? You
want to try flying again? Yeah, sorry. Yeah,
yeah. Movement. Yes. Chill. Less cool this time,
a little unsteady on her feet. Try to, maybe
it takes her two attempts to get off the ground
and try to move. Fly speed is somewhere around
here. It's the same as her walking speed, right?
Yes. Yes, so she'll try to fly 30 feet into the
sky. It'll take a number of, basically, moves
to reach that creature above. You see it's sort
of spinning around in the sky now. Before, it
was going one direction. Now it's turning. As
you see, those lights in the sky are locked against
it. Flashes of lights. Other guiding bolts being
thrown far above. You blast off again. Masonry
breaks. No, it's less cool this time. It's less
cool. A single rock moves a little bit. And Jeremy,
I just want to say that earlier when Salome said,
you know, I'll do this, but I'm not going to
leave you alone, I was going to cast a spell
that was going to leave a thing down there with
you, but plans changed. Yeah. So I'm leaving
Arhalon with you instead. Arhalon. It's pretty
cool, though, and it's actually... His turn.
Okay, that's great. Oh, boy. That's excellent.
Arhalon is going to run towards this giant and
take a swing with his flametongue sword. Are
you activating it? Yes. Oh, so it's a bonus action
before. Bonus action before you attack to just
get the thing going. And you see the blade will
ignite with full fire. The type of weapon used
by his father. A great sword wreathed in flame.
And I'm actually going to be rolling two d20s
because guiding bolt gives the next hit on that
target advantage. Oh, hell yeah. Oh, my gosh.
Oh, great. That's 24. 24 will hit. Okay, sweet.
He's also going to use his Searing Smite. Oh
my gosh! So the... You would hurt these poor
innocents! You would hurt my friends! Creature,
you will fall! And he flies in, sword coming.
So the base damage for the sword is 2d6 plus
4. This is going to get crazy. It's two more
d6 because of the flame tongue being active.
It is. And then it's two more d6 for the searing
smite. Oh, my gosh. So 6d6 plus 4. Got your bone
d6 around here somewhere? I... We paused to look
for the bone d6. And the consensus is I'm pretty
sure I have them at home. But... I did grab a
boatload of D6s from a boatload of our friends,
and I'm going to roll them. Oh, hell yeah. This
is going to be so ridiculous. 24. 24 damage.
24 fire damage. Holy crap. Okay. That's 66 plus
that modifier. Holy moly. He just slides in,
blazing sword ripping right into this creature's
chest, slicing through. It's like chain armor,
you know, hot, you know, smoldering gap in the
metal, and it roars out. Is that his turn? That's
it. Okay. And that is going to be Gabriela. Cool.
She's going to do what she does best. How tall
is this thing? This thing's 25 feet tall. 25
feet. Okay. Big boy. Gabriela, with her knowledge
of... Things. Would she know of a weak spot potentially
around his ankles or something? That's a tricky
one. Or is she quick enough to get behind him
and climb up? If you burn a step of the wind,
she could get behind. Because that would take
one movement to get behind him and one movement
basically to climb to the top. He's standing
next to the rubble of this building. I'll tell
you this. If you spend the extra movement and
beat an acrobatics roll to get up quickly. Athletics
or acrobatics, I'll allow. I will give her advantage
on her next attack because she'll be climbing
up to this behind this thing on his head and
you'll get flanking bonus because she'll be behind
it. Okay. I think that's cool. I kind of want
to do that. But if you feel that... Flank? Yeah.
If you feel the acrobatics check, though, she
can fall. Yeah. But she'll still be in flanking.
Yeah. It's true. All right. Very true. Let's
do it. Let's go for that. Hell yeah. Cool. Social
media move. You burn one key point, set for the
win. You see just, Jules, stay safe. And just...
Boom, she's already gone. Beeline across the
street moving so fast. I think she's still wearing
your, like, she bought new clothes, new dresses,
but she likes your outfit. She has that sort
of same sort of loose black clothing that seems
to blend into the sort of shadowy storm cloud.
She moves behind it. 11. I was only looking for
a 10. Oh, baby. It's not like climbing a fear
structure. It's rubble. So I imagine it's kind
of falling down. Anything lower, it's like a
thing would twist. She'd fall, but she just...
rebounding up this stuff. You're already costing
a ki point. So she stands upon one sort of flattened
piece of rubble, getting up to almost the back
of its neck. Actually, it probably wouldn't be
that high up. It's a single -story tavern, so
probably more like his spine. But as she moves
up there, take advantage of your attack. Cool.
Where's the armor covering? The armor would be
basically covering. It's shame -milled down.
So she could go for the neck. Yeah, she can jump
up. It looks like she can just barely reach the
neck with a pretty firm kick. Get some damage
in for this first one. Okay. That'll be the advantage.
Does she have any weapons? Because she does have
a melee weapon attack. That's just her punch.
That's just her punch. Okay, cool. Gabrielle
doesn't need weapons. She's got a key. Fair,
fair. That is going to be a 23 to hit. 23 will
hit. Holy shit. How is it that you don't have
Sensation? I have seen bigger foes. She hasn't.
That's going to be 10. 10 damage. Okay. You have
one more attack. You burned your bonus action.
That's what I was going to ask. Did that not
count as a bonus action? That movement with the
key point? The key point will. So you get one
more attack because you get two attacks normal.
But you won't be able to get your bonus action.
Get the third. Yeah. Okay. Cool. You guys are
turning on some new Ferraris. Characters we have
not seen since Saint -Étienne are running wild.
This one's going to be a 13. 13. Is that with
flanking? Oh, no, 15. 15 still misses. Fuck!
I'm sorry. It's always so funny. Goddamn. He
first cracks, and the thing, she turns to try
to hit it again. It's just like the shoulder
sort of flexes out of the way. Elbow comes and
almost takes her, and she kind of... bounce off
of it, lands firmly on top of this sort of like
flat piece of rubble, flattened out by his own
sort of body as he pressed onto it. Now she is
in position. Hell yeah. That is going to be Jules.
Sweet. Jules is going to look at over to the...
How far was Salome? Salome would be now 30 feet
up. And would you get knocked back? She would
be 10 feet behind you. 10 feet behind, 30 feet
down. So Jules is going to turn around, reach
out his hand, and he's going to use as an action,
animating performance, and grab the rock that
was used for Salome. Holy shit, yes! As a bonus
action. Oh my gosh. As a bonus action, first
he's going to cast Bardic Inspiration onto Salome.
Oh, baby! Okay. And if I'm reading this right,
double check it. I can still... With Bardic Inspiration,
if I'm using a bonus action for Bardic Inspiration,
I can still use a bonus action to command the
item as well. What? Just double check. I'm pretty
sure I read that right. Let me look at this.
Let me look at this shit. Yeah. Yeah. Except
in Jules on Google. What is wrong with me? Get
out of town. It didn't pull him up. It didn't
pull the character shape. What's wrong with Google?
It's under my bonus actions and actions. Actually,
hold on. Hold on. No, no. Where did I find it?
Hold on. Stand by. Okay. I found it. So this
bottom paragraph says, when you use your bardic
inspiration feature, you can command the item
as part of the same bonus action you use for
bardic inspiration. Once you animate an item
with this feature, you can't do it again until
you finish a long rest. Yeah. Damn. Okay, so
like the first turn when you aim an object. Yeah.
You can use the same bonus action to do bardic.
That's so cool. Yeah. So like I just imagine,
yeah, you just like. You go to animate this,
and that golden mode that shines towards Salome
splits and hits the rock that she leaves behind.
Salome, boom, gets a little ball around you,
and the rock behind gets it as well. Okay, cool.
Yeah, so actually that saves my action then.
It does? Yeah. Okay, I had it mixed around. I
was thinking I could still attack with the bonus
action by commanding it, but that still gives
me my action. It's using the bonus action to
animate it. So I still have an action. Cool.
Fuck yeah. Let's go with a tried and true. I'm
going to cast... Blindness, Deafness. Ooh, that's
a good one. Let's go for that one. I mean, it's
probably got a high con. Storm Giant? No. Yeah,
I'm going to use... Oh, that con is crazy. Sorry.
Crazy low. Crazy low con. That's a shitty con.
Okay. Cool. Yeah, it's gonna be third level.
Third level. Okay. It's gonna have to be high.
Okay. You ready for this? You ready for this?
Pass. What is it? 25. God damn it. I rolled really
good. God damn it. You just go to cast and I
think you see a dark shadow pass through the
eyes for a second and then almost like burst
away. That same sort of light blue shine in the
eyes just destroys your shadow. Eyes, pupil -less,
seem to turn and focus on you. Of course they
do. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Is that your turn? Do you
want to move? Right now, you are standing about
30 feet back from the giant. Arhalon is up in
its biz, and Gabrielle is right behind it. So
you are in a safe -ish location. Yeah. What's...
around me in terms of structure. Behind you is
the ramp up to the auroral diamond. You're kind
of staying in the middle of this dirt road. The
tavern kind of stands at a corner, so sort of
beyond that, on the west side is more dirt road.
On the east side, though, there is a building
that's sort of crackling, burning fire on it.
I may have got those mixed up. Let me double
check. Sorry, yeah. It looks like a store sort
of on the west side. On the east side, it looks
like there's a corner beyond that, like a long
sort of string of market stalls. Okay. So if
I were to go around to that building, I would
kind of start going around the side of the giant?
Yeah, yeah. If you want to go around to the building
up to the side. Yeah, he's going to make his
way to that building. Okay, so you bolt around
the side of the giant, around towards this building,
this store broken in, fire lighting it. As you
move closer, I want you to roll for me a perception
check. Oh, goddammit. In fact, what's your passive?
My passive is 16. Really? Yeah. Yeah. Holy shit.
I thought you had a negative. Oh, that's fine.
Okay, cool. As you go to move around it, Jules,
two things happen. The first, you move to the
side of the building and you hear screaming.
This screaming stands out from the rest because
it is muffled. Because it is sounds of people
screaming from inside the crush building from
where the fire seems to lick. As you take that
in, your eyes fall into the street beside you,
now sort of opened up, and you can see another
scream go up as this young, sort of teenage boy,
long bangs with dark hair, his eyes just like
is leaning over a body. Mom! Mom! And you see
a woman in a teal dress is lying beneath him,
or half her body is like... just completely cooked,
blackened wounds, smoking where a bolt of lightning
has seemed to rip through her flesh. Her left
arm, still wrapped in pale skin, still alive,
is pressed against her son's cheek, and you see
a trail of tears trickling down between the splayed
-out fingers, her mouth moving. You don't catch
words, but you do catch the moment when that
hand falls limp, the very instant when this woman
dies, and you feel that paddle. pressed into
your back, perhaps in your bag of holding. People
screaming, about to burn inside a building. A
woman who's just died in the arms of her son.
And you, Jules, with a choice to make. Is that
your turn? Yeah. Cool. One hell of a turn, Jules.
Yeah. Way up high, Bakunawa. moves down. Salome,
you're flying up, moving. This is the diva's
turn that is flying down to meet you. Much like
Hyronix, a very ivory white skin. You see this
one has long flowing hair, chiseled features,
huge massive chin. It's ridiculous. Sort of moving
down in the eyes, gleaming white light. Spools
of radiance seem to regard you and look surprised.
Give me a luck check, see if you recognize this
guy. D20, D100, I don't care. It's 50 -50. Yeah,
I just had to find my D20. Eleven and higher,
you got him. It's a two. You don't know him.
You know him, he seems to know you. Sister Salome,
what are you doing here? Quickly, what news?
There's no time. I don't... Everything's gone
mad. The creature, the dragon, it's gone. It's
insane. It's been attacking outer villages. It
came here. I don't know why it came here, but
the giants have followed. The city has fallen.
I don't know what to do. And you realize you're
a pari. You outrank this diva. You are a luminary.
You are a trusted of Atash. And you see this
figure is looking to you for guidance. What do
you know of the creature? Can it be? Stopped
here. Shit, that's bad. Yeah, it's pretty loud.
Yeah. All right, so I feel like because it's
an audio standpoint, I need to let the pants
people know that if you're hearing any buzzing
that comes up, our mic cables are starting to
go. They've been serving us well for over three
years now. Their life is about over. Mine went
last week, and now apparently Stephen's is. So
if you hear a buzz, I'm sorry. I can't do shit
about it right now. We'll get new cables. Buy
a sweatshirt. Yeah. That'll help. Yeah. Where
can I buy a sweatshirt at, Stephen? At fantasypants
.co, because .com was way too expensive. Buy
a sweatshirt. Save the podcast. All right. Let's
kill your... Monsters, dude. All right. I shouldn't
have said that. Get that music back. Yeah, where's
the music? You took it away. No, I didn't. It's
up. What? The fader's up, dude. Wait, what? Hang
on. It's at the bottom. It's right here. Wait,
but it's... The fader's up. Then why'd it go
away? I didn't turn it off. I don't know. I watched
you move it down. No, you're right. It turned
off, though, for some reason. What the hell?
I don't know. I don't know. Anyway, this creature
looks to you for guidance, but it's not your
turn, so don't say anything. Let's go back to
that. I already said a thing, though. What'd
you say? I can't remember. Oh, you told it. Oh,
what'd you ask? I was basically trying to get
its, like, perspective on if we can stop this
creature here with enough help. Oh, that's what
you said. Or, like, if it's, like, a god -like
thing. You know what I mean? Let me zim -zam
-zom right back into that. Oh, brothers are trying,
but I fear the creature is fast, and when it
moves into the sea, we cannot follow. I don't
know. We've tried before. It's... Is it immune
to lightning damage? I try to set a rule for
this. Give me a rule. You're rare in that you're
an actual storm aspect. There aren't a lot of
aspects like you, Salome. Most of them fall under
things like law or goodness or just general life.
Um, what's my roll here? Uh, I need you to roll
just luck. 50 -50. Oh, um, shit. I rolled a 10.
Okay, no. I don't know. What do we do? The people
are dying all around. We have failed our father.
We have failed Atash. Go down there and save
as many as you can. I'll do what I can up here.
Yes, sister. Yes. You see this creature? Wings
flap and it slides down. I think as you watch
him move down, Salma, as you turn and look back
and regard that creature, something begins to
click in your mind. In all the chaos you're only
now starting to realize in this moment of slight
calm as everything's just going mad around you,
you haven't felt the pull of the future. You
haven't had a vision. And usually it's like they're
almost always like, I imagine in your case it's
almost like when you stare too long at something
and see like an overlay of that object, right?
I imagine for you, you just halfway see this.
It's why we kind of described your intelligence
being so low. You're distracted and sort of vacant
because you're always seeing something. But your
eyes are clear right now. And they are focused
on the skies above. At first she thought it was
maybe just her. what I call initiative eyes,
where it's like serious business, but now that
she's been flying and time has passed and there
hasn't been any of that interference, she's realizing
it's something else. Hell yeah. Top of the round.
Yara makes a move you do not see. She is gone.
And the storm giant turns to strike back. Looking
quite hurt now after those attacks from Jai and
these follow -up attacks from Gabriela and Arhalon.
It's going to strike out. I think it's going
to go for Arhalon with a couple of sword swings.
So here we go. My first attack is a natural 20.
Don't. Fuck. Let me just do this to see how this
goes. This is going to be insane. Give me a second.
to roll some crazy damage here. Wait a minute.
Hold on. No, I've got adamantine armor. Oh, my
God! Oh, my God! He's immune to crits! He's immune
to crits! Whoa! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Oh, get nerfed,
nerd! Get fucking nerfed, dude! Oh, yeah. You
see this blow comes out of Arhalon. Why'd you
roll another one, dude? Because I'm rolling a
normal attack now. I made it rain for Arhalon,
man. Dude. Dude. For real. Holy shit. So, rather
than taking 12d6... plus a bunch of damage. He's
only going to take 66 plus a bunch of damage.
He takes, you see this weapon comes down and
you see there's a moment of like pause. Arlon
realizes he kind of, he went in with too much
righteous fury, stepped out of bound just a little
bit, was left kind of like with his leg out when
he should have been ready to like block this.
The sword with the parry doesn't quite make it
and the weapon comes down hard on him and catches
in the shoulder of his black gleaming plate.
Driving him down just a little, bit he takes
25 points of damage but he still stands beneath
the weight of this weapon it rises again comes
at him again this time with only a oof maybe
maybe 18 to hit um meets it beats it but He's
going to use a reaction and parry. Oh, shit!
Plus two to his AC. This time he's not going
to be taken off guard. The sword comes down again.
Arhalon, still recovering from that blow, brings
his greatsword up. Flaming tiny sword meets this
massive, gigantic, bent, heavy metal blade and
somehow turns it just enough for it to slide
to the side and smash into the dirt, sinking
deep. And Arhalon stands beside it, the dust
washing over him as the blade hits. Holy shit,
dude. See, you're driving that stab to the block.
Cool -ass move. That's crazy. Okay, that's that
giant. That's all he's got. There is another
giant, though. It's on the way. I'm really, really
nasty now. God damn it. Fuck. Yep. This other
creature, you see, begins to, like, move. He
hears the scream of rage from his kin. He says,
I'm coming! Take this! Reaches up towards the
sky, and you see a bolt of lightning flashes
down from just above, almost a small cloud forms
above you guys, crashing down on the storm giant,
his ally. But they are immune. But the creature
is... The creatures within range of the storm
giant are not immune, and so I want Arhalon and
Gabriella both to make dexterity saving throws.
And it's going to hurt a lot. Well, Gabriella
gets half damage. That's true. And she probably
will also pass the dex save. If she passes the
dex save, that's going to be incredible. Arhalon's
going to die now. Fucking hell. Yeah, he's got
a plus zero to dex. He needs to roll super high.
Let me start mapping incredibly hard for a second
here. Damn it. Just a 14. Oh. Shit. Nope. Never
mind. Okay. I have done the roll. Okay. I think
I might need to start transitioning to, like,
dice on a computer. I know you hate it, but my
god, these numbers are huge. Look at these damage.
You want to know how much damage you're taking?
Oh, yeah, give me your rolls. Never mind. Then
I'll tell you. Then I'll tell you. Yeah, Gabriela
got a 23. Holy shit! Gabriela takes literally
no damage. She sees the lightning coming, she
feels the air crackling, her hair stands up a
little bit, and you see she leaps back just in
time to get out of range, and this thing, boom,
blasts down. How's Arhalon doing over there?
You haven't told me what he took for damage,
so... Oh, what did you roll? Sorry, I wasn't
paying attention. Oh, oh, oh. It was a fail.
It was a fail. I think it was like 9 or 12 or
something. Arhalon takes 54 points of damage.
Get the fuck out! David. What? You can't. I just
did. I just did. How the fuck do we get out of
this? I mean, he's not after the next round.
There's a diva flying down on the way right now.
Arlon gets rocked. He's like staying tall. The
blade, the lightning strikes through. The blade
beside him where it lands sort of catches the
lightning bolt and it sort of crackles off. He's
like touching the side of it and it courses through
his body. And he has one hit point. What is this?
He took two hits. Still standing. Hey, still
standing. David literally created just a slaughter.
There's like six of these guys. Yeah. What the
fuck? The storm howls above. Arhalon barely stands.
Gabriela moves out of the way of the attack,
moves back in to engage Jules. You find yourself
caught between two difficult choices, many lives
on the line, and you can hear the screaming of
Arhalon. What will you do? Salome, your goal
lies in the sky, and yet your friend's screams
follow you as you move up. You've sent help towards
them, but will this diva be enough? Well... Guess
we'll have to wait a week to find out, won't
we? Because we'll call it there!