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at fantasypants .co. the losses. I know that.
I do. I felt the strain of it as well. So, from
the bottom of my heart, I just want to say, Jules
sucks! I'm serious about it. Jules sucks. I'm
just going to do a spotlight here. He just recently
returned from a wedding trip to Florida that
I did. We recorded last week. I basically left
immediately the day after that, morning after
that. So I have not prepped anything. Dude, I
knew what was happening the moment you had that
little pause. I'm like, ah, here it comes. Here
it comes. I love the visual, just thinking about
Oren sitting in his studio behind his desk, just
cackling to himself. Jules sucks, right? Full
belly lap, fall out of his chair. Oh, yeah, Jules
sucks. And speaking of people who suck, I was
going to grab some beer. You haven't killed him
yet. I was going to grab some beer for tonight.
I was going to grab my favorite beer, one called
Party in Your Mouth, the one singular palatable
beer made by our gracious employer and sponsor,
Reckless Brewing Company in Bethlehem, New Hampshire.
But guess what? Party in Your Mouth is still
not in stock. And the brewers to blame for this
travesty are right here in this very room, pants
people, the very gentlemen that stand before
me right now. So needless to say. I'll be adding
layer actions to this encounter. I've got some
for you. All you need to do is ask me. Well,
you didn't. Did you bring it? No, I didn't know
you wanted me to bring it. Well, you messed up.
Didn't I just bring you a four pack of that like
not long ago? No, I drank it. It's a good beer.
Yeah, no, but I'm saying I have proven that I
have a supply. I just need you to ask me. Well.
Also, it's a summer beer, David. A summer beer?
It's a summer beer. Where's your winter sour?
Yeah. Silence from the peanut gallery. You and
your IPAs. You know what that stands for? Idiot.
Peanut. Hang on. Ass. You can do it. You can
do it. You guys give me a second to go fix my
contacts. No. All right, get out of here. So
it's better off without you. And we're back.
We're back. Steven, you good? Okay, yeah. I'm
not crying. I just had a contact issue. You're
going to be crying. You can see all right? Yeah.
I want you to see fully what I'm going to do
to you tonight. We don't have a map. Yeah, there's
no map, David. See it with your brain. Hey, have
a little imagination up in here in the imaginary
show. The Imagination Station. Somebody out there
is going to get it. Never happened. There's always
somebody. I know the Imagination Station. Okay,
there you go. There's somebody. I'm going to
Imagination Station kicking your ass so hard,
David. Well, how about you Imagination Station
this? Oh, no. We're going to get sued by PBS.
Lowercase i, lowercase s. Jules, you feel this
effect coming over you, this feeling of something
trying to grab you, hold onto your heart, yanking
your very soul, and you feel Blanche's light.
This light just bursts out. I think we see in
the middle of this swirling glass shard, these
teacups broken, swarm around you, slashing and
cutting. Your blood is running down, dripping
onto the floor. In the middle of this, you just
burst a light. This creature before you screams
back. It's screaming. You can hear it kind of
go, starts to fade away. And all you hear now
is a wet gurgling. A sound of someone choking.
As it kind of stumbles back, you are freed from
this effect. And as the Gwishin before you stumbles,
you see something behind it. Not within this
shop. Really? Not here, physically, but there
is something looming over the creature, over
the shop, over everything. Something both far
away and everywhere around you. In this moment
of inspiration, this moment of light, you can
see, you can feel something that hates you, Jules,
so much. And even with your soul shielded from
supernatural fright, you feel your flesh break
out in a cold of goosebumps and the hairs of
your pompadour standing on end as this thing
sees you and hates you. And it's gone. You stand
here again, looking towards the Goetia, and you
hear a clattering of metal on wood. It is still
my turn. And so you see a crossbow bolt pops
out from the wound Chester made earlier. You
see that the white flesh right out of the open
wound begins to knit together and close in, as
if this creature is healing. Oh boy. Before you,
steam rises from the hot tea that trickles out
from the nearly closed crossbow wound, mingling
with the fading mist of your dissonant whisper's
effect. in the rising mist of the Goetian's very
presence. It was faint until now, but this room
has swiftly become lightly obscured by the whiteness.
This time, though, you remember everything that's
happening as you stand in this. And you would
note, Jules, I think Chester as well, that this
whiteness feels very reminiscent of the rattle
on God's breath. Very similar mist there. A voice
echoes through your mind. Something overlaying
that gurgling sound. There's no character to
this voice. Just an impression of words, almost
painful, like a scream reverberating through
your very skulls. I was a shop owner, proud and
proper. This place was my life and my legacy.
And that's my turn. Because you made me skip
the whole thing, basically. We can move to the
top of the round. And you hear a voice calling
her from a table, just, I'm sorry, this doesn't
make any sense. Kunan Chun like pokes out just
a little bit, sort of trying to unfurl a scroll,
rapidly trying to untie a tie on it. Before now,
she was mostly just moving teacups and creating
pools of tea on the ceiling. Little things, minor
haunts. This isn't her. I knew her in life. That
is why she was chosen as my practice. I am not
the one that wronged her, yet I can hold her
memory for the summon. They chose me because
she was not strong or dangerous. Something has
changed. The Gwishin. I can't help you fight,
but I can help you. And with a muttering of a
prayer as the scroll unfurls and begins to burst
to light, Kunon June casts Bless on all four
of you. Oh, nice. Hell yeah. Extra d4. I believe
saving throws and attacks. Yeah, that's going
to be huge. With that, as promised. Top of the
round. Layer. Action. I don't know. You hear
something. Like the sound of water pooling, squirting,
squelching. You look up to the ceiling and see
that on the ceiling, two pools of liquid, almost
like giant drops of water begin to drip down
from the sort of floorboards, the second floor.
Kind of creating these orbs that ripple and steam.
Hot. Amber liquid. And then you see these two
orbs burst into scalding hot jets blasting down
at two of you. So let's roll. Roll to see who
the hot tea hits? Yes, let's roll to see. So
we're going to d4. You're sick, David. You know
that? Blanche and Akio. Okay, great. God. I need
dexterity saving throws from both of you. Oh,
okay. Bladestorm gives plus to my con saving
throws, not my dex. So it's just that. But I
have my blast. Oh, yeah, baby. That's 19 on the
die, so that's 27. Oh, that's a pass. Is that
right? That is. Holy shit. That was for Blanche.
Okay. Then for... Akio. Let's see what we got
here. Akio was in bless too? Yes. He's going
to need it. 11. Fail for Akio. Pass for Blanche.
Blanche, you take 8 points of fire damage. Holy
fuck. On a pass? Akio takes 17 points. Oh no.
This jet. sits down uh it hits you blanche you
you actually you weave out of the way your blades
aren't active uh i think almost like your blade
shoots up and you see the jet almost curves around
the sort of magical almost sound humming energy
around it splashed up to the side of you as you
move away uh dancing away the ribbons sailing
but akio almost i think he's too worried for
you his eyes snap over to you as it's master
blade and he gets hit uh His body is scalded
by the burning liquid. Wow, and he's already
taken damage, so he's... Hold on, let me add
the... Because he took damage earlier. Yeah,
he's, like, halfway. Short rest, baby. Jesus
Christ. Do... Man, I want to know, like, how
much this thing was healing. You're in for a
bad time. Yeah. I will allow... I allow knowledge
checks for free. If you want to make a knowledge
check on your third, I'm down with that. I'll
say free action. You could be like, oh, let me
think about this for a while. I think it's supposed
to be an action. I don't like that because it's
like whether you know, either you know or you
don't. It's like if you know something, you shouldn't
need to take a while to be like, let me see.
I just want you to be able to roll it flat. I
don't care. Intelligence is already a stat that's
generally underutilized. I'd like to make it
Easier to use and better. Sure. And a lot of
those are going to come down to intelligence.
Anyway, that's top of the round. And it is my
swarm of glass. You thought I was done? I'm never
done. Jules LaRoche, I'm going to attack you
now. I'm going to miss completely. You're still
shining bright. Glass kind of trying to shoot
in. It's almost rebuffed, we'll just say, by
like this. I mean, you're like, your cloak is
moving around you, flowing, and kind of like
rebuffing some of it. It is a cloak protection,
so it's kind of helping. Hitting pieces that
come out your back. You're kind of holding, you
know, dodging the front, and it does not get
onto you. And I believe that's all I can do,
unfortunately. Oh, wait. I have advantage on
this, silly me. Yeah, still no. Blanche! Oh my
goodness. This is very bad. You've done very
well this first round, but this is a creature
that's quite strong. Yeah. I'm starting to feel
like we need to focus down the swarm first. It's
causing a lot of problems. So I had said that
I already went the 10 feet past Jules. I'm going
to go another 5 feet. so that I'm 15 feet away
from the swarm. And let's see. I'm going to cast
Lightning Lore at it. Ooh, okay. So out of Blanche's
free hand, a lash of lightning energy goes out
towards the swarm, and it needs to make a strength
save. Uh, no. Okay. No six. then it is pulled
10 feet in a straight line towards me. Like,
it's so cool, because it's not just one beam
pulling it. You just shoot out in this moment,
like, you seize. It's like an energy beam. Yeah,
you, like, catch the eyes, and, like, your lightning
cracks into all these tiny little fragments of
lightning that somehow grab all of them. Like,
this mind running these perfect calculations
in this singular moment to hit them all and yank
them all forward. It's so badass. And so that'll
be 2d8 damage. Lightning damage. Okay. Yikes.
Bad rolls. Just six damage. It all goes through,
though. Okay. And because of my extra attack
feat, now that I have one of my two attacks on
my turn can be a cantrip. So that was my cantrip.
So now that it's five feet in front of her, she's
going to swing with Ichigenka. That's... So cool.
Does this count as a... No. An item thing? It
wouldn't count. So the way I'm going to look
at Ichigenka, because I'm thinking about this,
and constructs versus items, the way I see it
is Ichigenka is really good at hitting something
that's standing still. Okay, like doors, I think
you've explained before. Yeah, if it's not moving,
you can take a brief second in swing to catch
it right at the weak point and immediately inflict
the ultimate damage on it. But if it is something
moving, you don't really get to have that opportunity.
Gotcha. All right, so let's see what we do for
just a regular old swing -a -roo. That's going
to be a... I mean, 21. So... D8 plus 6. I am
digging this track so much right now. Oh, I'm
glad I found this one. So that's 11 damage. 11
total? 11 total. Well, for each again. From a
slashing weapon. Yeah, slash. Still up, but looking
pretty bad. In fact, at this point, as you cut
this thing, your lightning bolt's pulling. A
lot of the dishes kind of disintegrate. Some
of them fall. You clatter into the ground, unmoving.
You slash the Igenka, getting this perfect arc,
like sweeping around jewels and catching a bunch
more. Glass shatters. This swarm looks much,
much weaker. Okay. You see there's only a few
left. It looks like this thing is not going to
be doing as much. at any rate. That's excellent.
And there was some confusion about whether or
not I had used Bladesong yet. We think maybe,
but just in case I hadn't, as a bonus action,
I'll use Bladesong. All right, so you used two
uses of Bladesong. No, no, stop. I just wanted
to say it, just in case, so there's no wedgie.
Pants people on the record. I'm just kidding.
You're fine. Keep being beautiful. Let's turn.
That's it for Blanche. That's going to be Chester.
Ugh. God. She has to. Whose voice I just cannot
do lately. My throat is just not having it. Hey.
Misdirection is still not on his sheet. I was
going to do that today. As I said. God damn it.
I have not had any time to prep. All right. Cool.
Whatever's on his sheet. Cool. I'll tell you.
So it's going to be plus one to his attack with
sling. Yep. And then if you do damage to 1d10
plus whatever. Yeah. It'll just be max damage
because he messed up. So that's a dirty 20. Nice.
What's his damage modifier with sling? Plus 3.
Okay, so 1d10 plus 4. And you're targeting the
swarm? Yes. Okay. And, yeah, if he misses, too,
you have the extra effect where you can use catapult
to launch back. So it's pretty cool. Yeah. Tricky
little weapon, that. 11. 11 damage on the swarm?
Uh -huh. Oh, man. Chester hits hard now. It's
so funny. He just looks out, lines up, fires
one. Just as a few glasses line up kind of exactly
in an arc. You see two paltry little pieces of
glass are swirling around you now. This thing
is almost entirely gone. Just two little jagged
shards swirling around you, Blanche. I mean,
can't something like this just come back from
another source? Are we wasting time and energy?
I hope not. Probably not. On this thing? Probably
not. That'd be crazy. Probably not. Hey, probably
not. Chester's done. Chester's done. All right,
fire's up. I'm your one -liner. I'm your cool,
lonely one -liner. Come on, come on. Think about
it. Think about it. I'm just kind of trying to
reload. Just trying to think of something cool
to say. Tea time's over. Shit. I'll have what
he's having. I'll have what he's having. Yeah,
it's good. Hey, Blanche. Akio. Okay. Oh, gosh.
Where's Akio? Oh, yeah. Akio went over to help
Jules. Yes, right next to you and Jules, basically.
Okay, sweet. Let's see if Akio can take this
swarm out. Okay. Move the five feet up closer.
It's sort of on your space. Yep. Now everyone's
kind of like, Chester's about 10 feet back from
you, Blanche. Jules, you're 10 feet back from
Blanche. Akio's five feet between the two of
you. And the Gwishin stands kind of facing Blanche
and Akio. All right. Let's see what we can do
here. First roll on the katana is not great,
but let's see. We do have a plus seven with this
katana. Okay. And then there's that for blast.
Oh, yeah. I think we got it. 14. 14 hits. Oh,
okay. Actually, it was 15, but okay, great. That
misses them. Trying to cheat in my house. So
that is D8 plus 4 slashing. Ooh, yeah, baby.
10. I had 1 HP left. Go ahead and describe. That's
great. Some overkill there with Akio. Akio, yeah,
he, with the blade in his mouth, slashes up just
as a piece of the teapot's about to hit. Blanche
and just slices it in half and they fall to the
floor. Attacking my master! You have no glass!
Get it! Yeah, I get it. Instead of glass, roof!
Okay, let's see. Akio's got 40 feet of movement.
Ooh. Getting up in there. And the Gwishin is
30 feet away? From you, 20 feet. Okay. So Akio
will move. Half of his movement there. Paws scraping
against the wood, splashing into the sort of
steaming liquid. Doesn't do damage, but that's
like lying before this equation where like he
is bubbling out of the wounds he has taken. Slides
up before it. What's he doing? Sliding in for
an attack? Yeah, he's got to go for his second
attack. I can't do it. I was thinking about Boofing
Blade, but can't do it since I already took the
first attack. That's true. oh baby yeah that's
17 on the die so um plus seven plus bless so
i think we got it you know i realize that boof
is like there's like a slang term for butt stuff
why would you say that he's a dog well it's because
if you put like stuff in your butt like drug
butt stuff yeah i don't think anybody thought
of that i've been told this who thought of that
uh me and my wife my wife thought of that actually
so she's the one that told me anyway uh did you
did you hit i wasn't paying attention hi post
let's think about butt stuff Yeah, definitely.
Yeah, definitely. Hell yeah. All right. Okay.
Sorry. A little distracted. Let me go for that.
Katana damage. Oh, no. Only five. Minimum katana
damage. Wow, that's... Then as a bonus action,
Akio is going to use his second wind to heal
1d10 plus six. That's a solid move. He needs
it. Especially being on the front line right
now. Okay, so that's 11 back for Akio. Not too
shab -a -roo. And Jules, you are freed from the
swarm. Single piece of glass rolls around Blanche
now. Your stalwart frontliners stand before you.
And beyond them, the Goetian. I really want to
do that. I really do. I have a fun new spell
that I really want to use, but it might just
be a dumb time to use it. Or it might be the
greatest time to use it. Who can say? I don't
know. I wonder what she'll do. David's acting
very shifty. I don't know what the spell is.
I don't like it. Steven seemed concerned that
it wouldn't work on me. I know, but that applies
to every single spell that I have. That's true.
That's true. That's very, very true. Anyone want
to roll knowledge checks here? Okay, can you
remind me? You can roll a check. Can you remind
me? what it did for Dissonant Whispers in terms
of its psychic damage? Psychic damage all went
through from what you saw. Oh, wait. Because
I made a mistake. I knew it. Wedgie knew it.
Okay, that's what I thought. A little bit of
Wedgie there. I'll keep the damage up. Okay.
Well, I'm not going to use that. You noticed
that since Whispers, Pelia shouldn't have gone
through, but it did anyway. And I don't feel
bad about asking that because it actually happened
in episode. I would have told you. Do you want
to tell them what it was? No, because I want
to save this one. It's a fun one. Okay. It's
a pretty fun one. Okay. Fuck. I really don't
have much to use or to do. You got some heals.
I should note also that Bane wouldn't have all
gone through, but... Chester's... No, not Bane.
Sorry. Hex. But Chester only rolled a 1, which
can't be halved. So he didn't actually change
his damage amount, but he would be halving that.
Necrotic. Where is Blanche at HP -wise? Blanche
is at 29. And where is Akio? Akio is at 33 out
of 53. Ooh. So Blanche is far worse. It's close,
but yeah, Blanche is a little worse off. If you're
curious, I'm doing pretty well. I'm actually
looking great. I really don't give a shit about
you. Blanche also has Beast AC, so it's kind
of like... That's true. I don't know which one's
the better one to heal. Because Jules is still
above half. Okay, let's do this. I'm going to
cast Bardic Inspiration onto Akio. Nice. That's
great. Blanche still has... Yeah, so I'm going
to put another DA up there. Because now that
I have so many ding -ding dice... And I'm sorry,
where did you say Akio was at? 33 out of 53.
Out of 53, okay. I'm trying to decide whether
I want to heal myself or Akio. I wonder what
you'll do. I know. Akio is right in front of
this thing. If this thing is to make any physical
attacks beyond Akio, it would have to leave.
Right, okay. His range. Cool. So then Jules will
cast a second level healing word onto Akio. Yeah,
buddy. And that is 2d4 plus 4. Seven. Ooh, hey,
that's not nothing. That's good. It's not nothing.
Not nothing, that's for sure. That might just
save that little dog's life. He's a big dog.
Is that your turn, Jules LaRoche? Yes. Then it's
my turn. Damn. That wound closes a little more.
And I'm going to... Let's see here. That didn't
work before. So I'm going to make two attacks.
On Akio. No! This is where it can get real bad.
Woof. Shut up, this is serious. Yeah, this is
serious time for serious Akio death. There's
a 14 hit. No. Okay. I do hit once, I'm guessing,
with a 20. Yeah, 20 hits. Okay, two attacks.
First one. will come down. You see as things
like hands reach out, long fingers, and little,
like, almost little orifices open at the edge
of these fingers in bits of scalding water. It's
going to run down the hands. It strikes out at
Akio, hoping to burn. Akio weaves out of the
first one, kind of parries it with a sword. No,
you! It grabs him by the neck with a second,
crushing down. He screams out as I do some damage.
And if I remember from last week, this thing
hits hard. Never actually had to hit you last
week. Something did a bunch of damage. Was it
the swarm? The swarm did pretty good. I rolled
max damage on it. This is 11 points of damage
from this attack on Akio. He's kind of bowing
down. Badger's thing's pushing him down. He's
standing strong. No! I am a proud disciple of
the Storm Eye! And that is, I believe, my entire
turn, right? Yes, okay. Top of the round, lair
action. God. Akio stands at one end of the room,
you guys are in the other, and you begin to feel
the floor shake a little bit. You hear wood standing
on end. You see the floorboards beneath your
feet begin to shift. almost like rising and weird
jagged patterns all the way across the floor.
This room has become difficult terrain. You see
the same on the stairs leading up. What? Which
means half movement if you're moving around this
room right now. Great. You're half movement.
This is my first time using layer actions in
this entire campaign, I believe. I think I was
going to use them with Ozen, and then Crispin
blew up the shrine, so it was no longer an active
layer, which is good because you would have died.
If that hadn't happened. But... It's true. But
now I'm doing them here. And I'm kind of excited.
It feels like a Gwishin thing. You know, you're
in the lair. You're in this thing's treasure
location. And it's powered up. That's all for
this one. Just difficult terrain. You see the
creature itself shifting its body, sort of moving
in strange ways. It seems it's not affecting
it at all. Okay. I think we got away easy with
that one. It's not too bad. That is my... Oh,
my swarm's gone. That is Blanche. Oh, wow. Okay.
That happened fast. So, you said... Or Kunon
Jun said that the way that the Gwishin were sated
was like somebody spoke about them, right? As
he kind of put it, he mentioned a few things.
He mentioned that he had to carry its... He had
to call upon its name and its memory. Okay. He
called upon this being, and he thought that by
just, like, acknowledging the good it had done,
he was able to, like, satiate it, and it didn't
work. He seems like he's panicking. This is not
working the way it should. It's like something
happened to the equation. He also mentioned that
he was called upon because he knew of her, but
was not the one that wronged her. So there's
deeper rules here, deeper mechanics. Okay. So
probably not something we're going to figure
out here and now, because I was thinking about
just calling out to him and being like, hey,
keep it up, I guess. Maybe not. Okay, so how
far away is Blanche from the Gwishin now? Blanche
is 20 feet. Okay, 20 feet. She will use 10 feet
of movement to step another 5 feet closer through
the difficult terrain. That's right. And I'm
going to rinse and repeat here. I'm going to
cast Lightning Roar again. Oh, nasty. Okay. 15
feet away. So, strength save. Strength save.
Gwishin can't be strong, right? Equations are
pretty strong. It is going to be a tricky one.
It's tweener. 13. Oh, yeah. Fail. Oh, really?
Yeah. Fail. Okay. 15. I'm sorry. I did math bad.
It's 15. It's 15. Okay. I did math bad. I did
math bad. Shit. I feel like I'm taking it back.
I was thinking about it and I was like, I did
the modifier again. I was like, wait. That doesn't
make sense. All right. Well, Blanche has the
30 feet of movement because she's in Bladesong,
so it's 40 total. So she has the movement to
get up in melee with the Gwishin and go in for
her second attack with Ichigenka. Yeah. 15 on
the die. So we're hitting. That's going to be...
I'm trying to decide, maybe I should just use
my Bardic now to get the extra damage. Because
with the plus nine and the Bless, it's going
to be tough to miss. So I don't know if I should
wait around for a miss to use my Bardic. Yeah,
you would get... Whatever the damage die roll,
or whatever the D8 roll is, it gets in lightning
damage or something? Yeah, it takes... If you
use that on the attack roll... then he'd have
to make a con save or take thunder damage equal
to the bardic. Okay. Yep, that's great. Let's
go ahead and do that. Or do I have to call it
before the damage roll? I feel like I probably
should. I don't know if I do. Yeah, it has to
be used on the attack roll. Okay. Oh, on the...
Yeah. Okay, well, I haven't rolled damage yet.
So, yeah, I'll use the bardic. So we'll get the
extra damage out here. Okay, so for Ichigenka
damage, That is 12. Not bad. Damn. So then con
save, or you take six thunder damage. 19 on the
die. Oh, yikes. Okay. There goes Blanche's bardic.
You just try to pull the lightning, and it just
rips itself free of the lightning in an instant.
One arm out. You come up and stab through it,
stretches that golden metal within you, pulses
through you, through the blade of your sword,
into the creature, and you see it just kind of
grits. Flexes. There's a feeling, like a tremor
that runs through it, and the body seems to not
react at all. This wide eye gets closer and closer
to you, growing, growing. You see a smile behind
that wet hair. I think I'm just going to end
Blanche's turn. I'm trying to decide if we need
to try to reason with this thing, but I don't
know. That's Chester. Jules, stay back. Let your
sidekick do his thing. You take a shot, but you
don't tell me to stand back. Natural one. Oh,
no. But that does mean he misses. Oh, that's
right. Yeah. So let's do this. He takes a step
forward. You see one shard of one of the tea
glasses that, like, land just below him. He kind
of takes a step forward to, like, you know, set
the shot up. And there's this, like. You see
a fragment of glass with this beautiful illustration
of a horse on it. Chester hits it, slips and
slides, goes falling backwards. The bolt shoots
out as he lands. He is prone. Oh, my God. But
as the bolt shoots out, goes, flies over the
Gweezing shoulder up the stairs. Do you want
to use? Yeah. Misdirections. Trick shot. Let's
use it. Oh, shit. This thing kind of weaves out
of the way and Blanchard kind of, you see his
neck spins. You hear a crack as his neck just
turns too quickly over to Chester. The smile
facing him. And Chester smiles back, snaps his
fingers, and you hear behind this thing a ping.
This ping sound. A bolt comes flying out from
behind. I roll a deck save with disadvantage.
Just barely fails. Wow. That was close. I was
like, oh, I think I passed that, but Dex is actually
not big. This thing smiles. Ping! A bolt comes
flying down, crashing right into this creature's
back with this incredible force. You hear bones
crack. He sprays out from behind. I think you
roll, if I'm right, 3d8. Holy shit. Dude, you
should just miss on purpose. Yeah, seriously.
For the catapult spell, as Chester... Blast it,
and he comes flying back. It's pretty cool. 3d8?
3d8 flat. So it's honestly up in the air if it's
more damage than his actual attack, which is
a 1d10 plus 4. Yeah, it's getting pretty... So
it's a d10 plus what? d10 plus 4. So 3d8 has
a higher chance. 3d8 has a much higher chance
of being much higher. Yeah. But he only has three
of these a day. And the first one is burned now.
You need this. 16. Oh my goodness. Bone snap.
screeches the same kind of gurgling breath, kind
of overtaking the screen. And Chester just cocks
the weapon. Jules looks down at Chester. Look
at you, trick shot. Trick shot? I like it. Hell
yeah. If you remember, that was on Andrew's list.
We liked the one way back. Chester's got a name.
Yeah, buddy. Luminary title, sidekick title.
Trick shot. That felt like the moment. That felt
great. That felt great. Yeah, that was big damage.
You know what? You know what? Take a button.
Whoa. I like it. Holy moly. Steven, he actually
handed me a button? Yeah. Oh, my God. Feeling
generous. Damn. It feels wrong. Maybe make some
party in your mouth, and you'll see one, Steven.
Damn it. Akio. Okie dokie. Gosh. Do I do Boofing
Blade or do I just go all in for some slashing
damage? Boof that Gleeson. Get in there. Well,
see, the thing is then Blanche is going to have
to step back to get out of range and take an
AOO. So I think we're in it now. Are you guys
being children? David keeps looking at me. He's
like, you know. Quit being gross. Okay. David,
you're taking it too far. I'm rolling for the...
Dropping my die. He boofed his die. Episode title,
Boof. I'm sorry. Boofing in the tea shop. Boofing
in the tea shop. Stupid. Oh my god. Okay, I'm
going to have to use my bardic on this one too,
I think. So that's... Oh, there we go. Wow, still
just barely a hit with 16. 16 hits? Yeah, 16
hits. And... Oh no, what did I... Oh, I only
rolled a 2 on the bardic, so... Con save for
the thunder damage. 14. I don't know what the
save is. It's probably your spell save, DC, Jeremy.
Wait, say that again? For the bardic inspiration.
Oh, for the damage? Yeah. For the additional
thunder damage? It's a DC 15. Oh, nice. That's
it. You got it. So you take two extra thunder
damage. Hey. Nice. That's damage. Yep. And then
the slashing damage, which is seven on the first
attack. And second attack with the katana. Oh,
baby. That's a 19 on the die, which means he's
got expanded crit range. Oh, shit. Yeah, the
sidekick crits on a 19 or 20. Okay, so 2d8 plus
4. Yeah. Ooh, 14. 14. Holy shit. Akio is unloading
on this thing. I mean, Paz just got scalded,
slapped down, stood strong, and then just fully
kind of breaks free of the grip and swing, swing
a critical. Where does he hit with that second
crit? He's going midsection, below the belt.
You know, quad area. Oh, going for a boof. Stop.
Again, just like tea starts dribbling, spraying
down. You hear just like water against the wood
of the bottom step spreading down across the
floor. This thing is gurgling in pain. Holy moly.
Holy moly. Holy moly. It doesn't matter anymore
because I already hit, but I'd like to have Akio
swing around into flanking with Blanche. Okay.
Hell yeah. I would have been really pissed if
I missed one of those attacks because I didn't
do that. That's Akio. That's Akio. And that's
Jules. Cool. So what? That was like one second
between Trickshot, Akio taking his turn, and
Jules? Yeah, everything was kind of happening
all at once. So cinematically, Jules had looked
down at Chester and said, look at you, Trickshot,
as this is happening with Akio. And then Jules
goes, watch this. A little one -upsmanship. And
Jules will put his hand down over the shard that
fucked up Chester with the horse on it. He will
use an action to animate it. Get a horse meat?
Animate it. And he will use the dancing item
stat block to send it flying 30 feet to the Gwishin.
And 30 feet ignores difficult terrain. It's flying
right over the floorboard. And it's a plus 7
to hit melee weapon attack. That's amazing. Dancing
items? Oh, it's your bardic! Oh my gosh, you're
a creation! That's so cool. Yup. It's your stuff.
In the air, this thing slides across. And it
rolled a natural one for its first attack. Oh
my goodness. It's another horse! Another horse
-shaped cup falls to the ceiling. Ding! Oh wait,
hold on, hold on. It says fly 30 feet and then
hover. Would that be bludgeoning damage if it
were to hit force damage Yeah, what's it look
like great? Is it similar? You're like you're
golden is like a golden kind of aura kind of
like your inspiration or what? What's it look
like? Oh, I hadn't thought about that. I just
thought about that. No, it's like that It's like
the dark blue and purple. Oh, that's so cool.
Yeah, I love it. Oh, yeah. Love it Hell yeah,
so how far was the Grecian from from where I
sent it from 30? It was 30 feet, exactly. Okay,
cool. Never mind. It can't move anymore. So now
it's like this thing has a little shard of glass
on one side, Blanche in front, Akio in back.
It's kind of looking around. Hell yeah. I love
it. And that is my turn. This thing looks pretty
beat up, but you see some of those wounds begin
to stretch, knit closed again. Oh. Okay. Yeah,
this is what we're going to do. This is what
we're going to do. You know what we're going
to do? We're going to do this. And we go up the
stairs. It leaves. Huh. Okay. You just see it
begins to, it's kind of, you know, its body stretches
backwards suddenly. Kind of like besides Akio.
I imagine the stairs are about 10 feet wide.
So it kind of like moves aside of Akio. Reaching
out like, like sort of weird extra style. You
have the legs up front, the arms in the back.
It's kind of moving upside down. And it kind
of just begins to crawl away up the steps. But
it does mean, Attack opportunities from Blanche
and Akio. I'll do Blanche's first. I could. What
about the shard? I could try to disengage here,
but that's something else I wanted to do. Ooh.
It can use its reaction on its own. The shard.
It gets its own reaction? It gets its own reaction.
It gets its own reaction. You know what? Yeah.
Take him. Nice. Take him. Well, Blanche rolled
a natural one for hers. Oh, shit. I'm glad that
I chose not to disengage. I'm glad you didn't
tell me. Oh, no. It's not great for Akio either.
I think I need to roll max on the blast. Blanche,
you're over there trying to make your A -O -O,
and that horse -shaped shard of glass comes flying
up, pings your weapon to the side accidentally
as it goes to hit. Well, I got 14, though. Did
we hit on 14 before? I think we hit on 14. You
did. Nice. Okay. Akio just barely with max on
the blast. Got his. So that's, let's see. Where's
my D8? Ooh. Nine. Nine damage? Okay. Nine damage
on the AOL. Nice. Now that tiny little teacup
gets its attack. Seven on the die. Plus seven.
Yeah. Yeah. That's great. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. Force
damage. Come on. It was cracked. Your butt's
cracked. Nine. Nice. Nine force damage. Nine.
Okay. That hurt. That hurt. Force damage too.
Okay. That really hurt. Boom. This thing, like
it's moving and this, I imagine the glass kind
of floats above it as moving and just. Jots down
through the stomach of this creature. Cuts through,
ripping down, sticking down into the top of the
steps as it moves over it and kind of peeling
itself out. Again, a gushing sort of wave of
teeth pours over it. Akio gets a strike in as
well, slashing down a leg as it moves. Blanche,
you're rebuffed by this shard. And you hear...
Horse shard. Holy shit, but this thing is gonna
vanish up the steps difficult terrain, but it's
able to move freely through them But 15 feet
and it vanishes into the darkness above you can
see up like where the steps fade into this black
hallway again There's a lightly obscuring mist
all around you so your perception checks are
actually lowered But this thing is gone into
the darkness. You do not see where it goes I'll
use my action to do something layer action no
You're going to love this one. Fuck. You're going
to really love this one. You see, on the other
side of the room, on the shelves, filled with
the now shattered teacups. Oh, come on. A number
of these shards begin to rise up and swirl together.
I told you. Oh, yeah, baby. There's another one.
It's going to use its full movement to move.
Let me think. Actually, the way the shop was
designed. I think it would be about 45 feet away,
so it would not actually be able to reach Jules
and Chester this round. Good. But I want it to
work. So the shards are all kind of moving. Slide
up towards it. Let me able to check. It is, I
think, 30 feet of movement. 40 feet, which would
be just outside your range. As Blanche and Akira
move these steps, these shards kind of... move
into the space between Blanche and Akio and Jules
and Chester. There's now this dancing sort of
wall storm of glass blocking our party off from
each other. And that's my turn with that. They
will now take the Tosspawn initiative following
that lair action. You gotta stop this thing.
Now you see how bad this is, and you know up
there somewhere it is healing. Yep, exactly.
Blanche, that's you. I'm so conflicted because
I want to go after this thing, but I'm afraid
to leave Jules alone with the swarm. Do you think
Jules can survive this if Blanche goes after
the Gwishin? Maybe. We'll find out. Okay. Find
out. I love it. I love it. We'll find out. So,
dungeoneering is not a skill in this game. But
what I'm asking for is like... What the hell?
Where are you going with this? Does Blanche have...
Like, she can't even see if there is a room at
the top of the stairs? Or... It's fully dark
where the stairs kind of... Because this room
we're in right now is very dim light. You're
just getting light from the windows. Up there,
it just leads into what looks like it might be
some kind of hallway. You're not too sure. It
might be an apartment complex or just an apartment
in general above this door. But you just see
full shadow. There's no light shining in from
up there. Just a little bit of light that kind
of filters down the top of the stairs and vanishes.
Okay. So it would be considered full dark at
the top. All right. I've got a crazy idea. Tell
me if this is going to work, David. All right.
All right. I picture Blanche having maybe some
contraption on her head where she like quickly
nods her head and her goggles switch. Or like,
you know, like the... Or like maybe they're each
like a monocle and it like switches from eyes
of minute seeing to the goggles of night. Can
we call that like an object interaction? Yeah,
because honestly speaking, I think you technically
can just have both those equipped at the same
time anyway. Which would be goofy as fuck. Which
would be goofy. So it's like, it's not like there's
a mechanical reason you wouldn't... Yeah, we're
just saying you always have them ready to go
because it makes sense. Now with 60 feet of dark
vision. What can Blanche see at the top of the
stairs? You're peeking at the top of the stairs,
and you can see where there is sort of a... Like
an archway or something? Here at the bottom,
you see the ceiling of what looks like a hallway.
You can see the edges of doors that are mostly
closed to one on each side at the very front
of it. And the room kind of, from where you are
now, you can just see it expands downwards. It's
about 10 feet wide. You don't know how long down
it is, but the two doors you see are about 5
feet down this hallway at the top. Okay. 15 feet
up to the top of the stairs. And so there was
five feet. I always get this like, okay, so Akio
was 10 feet away from me because there was a
five foot square in between us. He's not within
five feet. The other mind is rough. Akio is 10
feet away from me. Okay, damn. Oh, well, I guess
there's no reason why I can't use some of my
movement. So Blanche will use 10 feet of movement
to step forward five feet, grab a hold of Akio.
I don't know if this is going to work, but hold
on. What are you doing? And the ring of spell
storing on her hand begins to glow. What are
you doing? Oh, my God. And Blanche casts Dimension
Door. What? Dimension Door? You have that? Yes.
Oh, my gosh. So I want to cast it. and move us
in a, it says you can, it can be a place you
can see, one you can visualize, or one you can
describe by stating distance and direction. That's
really, really cool. So I'm going to describe
like a 45 degree upward angle. And you said it's
15 feet to the top of the stairs? Yep. I'm going
to go, what do you think, 35 feet? Or 40 feet?
Ooh. If there's a room at the top of the stairs,
Yeah. You know, I'm guessing, so if it's 25 feet.
Holy shit. All right, I'm going to say 35 feet,
final answer. Holy shit, okay. You step forward.
What's this look like? Describe it. The ring
of spell storing starts to glow and shake, and
then all of a sudden Blanche and Akio just blip
and disappear. Jules, you just see that from
behind the glass shards. They're gone. But it's
the Ring of Spell story, right? So that doesn't
break my concentration on the protection from
evil. Or did protection from evil even work on
the swarm? Or was that just on the Gwishin? Okay,
so. Yeah, it definitely was just on the Gwishin.
Gotcha. So you move up. That would put you 20
feet right into the hallway. 20 feet from the
top of the stairs. Perfect. You land in the hallway.
As you kind of land, you find that you are about
five feet away from the very end of the hall
where you see a small end table. It sits with
a vase with dead flowers. You see wallpaper sort
of peeling and decrepit. This house, as you're
standing here, looks like it's... then decaying
so quickly like the spirit of this place just
wants to die just let it all die the sagging
roof above you can again it's a light this is
a myth so everything around you is slightly obscured
by mist you're kind of looking at this and you
see what's close to you but everything else is
a little hard to make out with this whiteness
you realize that white sort of body of this thing
might be hard to see. But you see doors that
are mostly closed. A tiny bit of light from underneath
these doors, but it's almost pitch black in this
main hallway where very little of it's filtering
through. There are two doors about 15 feet away
from you at the start of the hall. And two doors
actually right beside you and Akio. You stand
between them. Okay, so four doors off the hall.
Four doors total off the hall. Okay. None of
them are open or all of them are open? All of
them are open to crack. Of course they are. Because
I'm an asshole. Yeah, for real. Now this thing
moved from the stairs up. You don't know how
far it could have gone. So how wide is the hallway?
Like how far are each of the doors from Blanche?
I still have 30 feet of movement left. Wow. The
hallway is 10 feet wide. So you have one that's
right beside you and one that's five feet away
from you. Okay. Like five feet and you're on
the door. Can I... push the first door open,
the one I'm closest to? Can I just push it open
from there? You're looking into this decrepit
bedroom. A small, just like, you know, single
person bed. Looks like it's sort of sagging.
You see a bookshelf covered with molded over
books. You see a window barred over with a little
bit of light filtering in so the space is somewhat
dimly lit. And a little bit of light filters
in the hallway around as you look in. You don't
see much of note. It's quaint. It's a cute room.
Looks like maybe once upon a time it was very
well treasured. There's a unicorn pattern on
the sort of bed sheets. Okay, so kids room probably.
Or like an old lady room, kind of. It's that
kind of unicorn pattern. Like, quilty, kind of
stuffy, little bowl of, you know, stale mints.
No, like, wet footprints, no horrifying grecian
in sight? Nothing that you see. Okay. Is this
still difficult terrain? No, that was only on
the first floor on the stairs. Okay, move the
five feet to the next door, push that open. Push
it open. Now you do see a child's room. Okay.
As it moves open, you can see like a similar,
you know, a smaller bed with dragon pattern on
it. You know, this establishment belonged to
Bi Su Min, who was the, this equation, she was
an older lady, and she had given it to her son,
Bi Chin He, who... Ruined it and actually as
you're looking into this child's room, you can
see like the dragon pattern on the bed You can
see a little toy stuffy. He looks like a room
that's been well -preserved You know the child
had grown but the room was kept as it was you
could hear in your mind again that reverberating
voice this shop was my everything and he Lost
it lost it in a game of chance. He ruined me
ruined me ruined me no character just Okay, so
if Blanche was 20 feet from the top of the stairs
and the hall is only 10 feet wide, with 25 feet
of movement, she should have enough movement
just to check the other two doors, right? Yes,
yeah. Let's keep both open. Yes, keep those two
doors open. Knock one open. Slides open. You
see a small little, almost like parlor, dining
area. Old sort of couch covered over in an old
quilt. You see, again, a little coffee table
with a tea set lying out. All covered in dust.
All looking sad. You kick the other one open
and you can see a small bathroom. It's an old
chamber pot room. Oh, shit. So I didn't see her
anywhere. You didn't see her anywhere. Not without
a different kind of check. And you already used
your actions this turn, but you have the place
to open up. Maybe Akio can see what you couldn't.
Did she leave footprints from, like, the top
of the stairs at all? Like, I'm thinking, like,
wet watermarks or something. Oh. Like a trail
to follow. Trying to decide how much to give
you because this would technically be some kind
of check. There should be some kind of, I mean,
there's wetness. I'll say this. There's wetness
at the top of the stairs sort of pooled out.
It looks like it's kind of running down the floorboards
though. You don't see any wetness in the rooms,
you know, if she did something or what, but you
see no wetness, no wet prints moving in, just
wetness sort of at the base of the stairs and
like sliding marks deeper down the hall. Okay.
Well, that's all, that's all her actions. So
that's, that's it for Blanche. Okay. Chester.
Okay, so... Totally forgot that Chester gets
two attacks. Oh, yeah! Shit! Yeah. Oh, no! Yeah.
Yeah. You know what? That's actually not a forget.
He cannot take two attacks with a crossbow. He'd
have to take a second attack with something else.
But, like, crossbows have a loading property,
which means you can only use them for one of
two attacks in a turn. So he could use a crossbow
and then whip out, like, something else's sling.
Okay, well, what about quick reload with this
swarm? What? Oh, quick reload, because you can
shoot... That lets you shoot two things at once,
right? I wouldn't really work on a swarm, because
a swarm is one creature. It's a good point. Actually,
quick reload also wouldn't work with a crossbow.
That's kind of a rough... It's a powerful weapon,
but it has some trade -offs. I'm just saying,
the extra attack says the archer can attack twice
instead of once, whenever they take the attack
action on their turn. We'll be able to check
it with... I mean, I'm all for you saying, no,
that's not what it means, but I'm just... That's
just what it says word for word. What do you
call multi -attack? It says extra attack. Extra
attack. Loading property, extra attack. Yeah,
there's actually a feat for crossbows that lets
you take two attacks. Chester would not have
that. Perhaps something he can get later on as
he loads up, though. Okay. So he only gets one
attack. But you can also do a second attack with
a different weapon. Sure. It just takes time
to reload. All right, well, he's going to go
with Misdirection anyway at the swarm. Okay.
Hell yeah. And that's going to be a 26. 26 will
hit? Oh, yeah, that'll hit. Lines up a shot,
sees a bunch at once, and boom, fires through.
That is 11. Not bad. A lot of 11s tonight. The
bolt just blasts through a bunch of glass, and
you see it strikes into the stairs just where
Blanche and Akio had just vanished from. Okay,
cool. And then, so where's this swarm in terms
of the stairs versus us? Imagine it 10 feet from
the stairs and 10 feet from you. Or just around
there. It's basically like, or 15 from the stairs,
10 from you. Okay. That five foot square. And
how far is the top of the stairs from us? Top
of the stairs would be 30 feet to the base of
the stairs from where you are. And then 15 more
feet, 45 feet. Okay. It's Jules after Chester,
right? It is. It's Akio and then Jules. It's
Akio and then Jules. Okay, cool. So after Chester
fires that shot, he's going to look up to Jules
and Jules will nod. Finally! Finally! Yes! Use
my slots. Use my slots. And Chester will Misty
Step. Yeah. Nice. Wow. He's so happy. As far
as he can go to the stairs up the stairs. 30
feet. Yeah, so he's at the base of the stairs.
Okay. He basically lands where his arrow just
struck. Like the crossbow. His hand is on the
bolt as he appears. And he's kind of behind Akio.
Akio is on top of the stairs now. He's at the
top of the stairs. Okay. We're still fine. Whatever.
You don't see Akio. Whatever. Cool. It is dark
up there though. He looks up into pure darkness.
And then he's going to move up the stairs. Okay.
It's half speed, so he gets... He's at 30 feet
still, so he's all the way up the top. Yeah.
Cool, so he's with Akio then. Akio's on the other
side of the hall as he comes up there and sees.
But he cannot see. He's safe currently. Okay.
That's fine. Seems like it. He just needs to
chill right there. Cool. He's at the top and
stands, and that's going to be Akio. Okay. Akio
wants to... He has keen hearing and smell. So
he has advantage on perception checks that rely
on hearing or smell. And the obscured mist wouldn't
actually affect that, would it? Because that
relies on sight. Akio can smell things out without
that. Damn, so he gets advantage and bypasses
the disadvantage. That's really, really good.
Oh, we didn't know there was disadvantage. There
would be substantial perception checks with the
light mist, but that actually wouldn't affect
Akio if he's trying to sniff out and is a dog.
It just makes sense. That's amazing. With all
the doors open, all the scents, everything he
can hear is all creeping towards Akio. He can
sort of feel it, smell it. Akio, I've lost her.
Can you locate it? Yes, master. Close his eyes.
First roll is a dirty 20. Let's see if I crit.
Nope. 19, so 20 with the plus one. Akio lets
the scents. Sensations wash over him. Smelling
the dust and the must of the rooms all around.
The light decaying scent of the flowers just
behind. He can smell you, Blanche. He can smell
your turtle musk. He can smell Chester as he
slides on top of the stairs. That sort of dirty,
sweaty smell. And it's off his floral shirt.
He can smell the lacquer on his crossbow. And
there is a scent, a pungent odor of tea, bitter,
bitter tea. A scent not coming from the rooms,
but coming from this very hallway in which you
stand. Huh. He hears Chester's feet as he lands
on top of the stairs. Whoa, hey, Blanche, Akio,
you up here? Hello? Looking into the darkness.
And then he hears. Light, wet steps coming from
down the hall, coming from the ceiling and the
wall, just above the staircase, just above Chester.
A gurgling. The sound, the sound of dripping
water. It's right on him. And he has no idea.
And we'll call it there.