Hey guys, zipz up, get on our socials, Facebook,
Instagram, Discord, other ones, etc. Enjoy the
episode. The wind is crazy here. People are saying
this is just like what happened on Tythos before.
The shield -bearers have formed a perimeter around
us, and we are moving on to the Conquer Jewel.
My sister, she wasn't home when the warning came
in. Our parents are here, but I don't see Emi.
We don't know what's going on. We saw luminaries,
Jules Laroche and Blanche Trudeau, along with
a half -dragon, Cholet's son probably, flying
off into the storm towards the east. No one is
saying what their mission is. No one is saying
anything. Could it be that Ozen is here? That
he was always here? We just don't... Wait, the
clouds are breaking up. The storm seems to be...
Oh, Sage! Oh, Sage, what's happening? Whoa. What
is happening? What happened, gentlemen? I have
a guess. A giant turkey kaiju. You know what?
I'm not going to take that segue. Steven, why
a giant? I'm not taking it. Steven, why? Because
today is Thanksgiving. Oh my goodness. Because
we record. Hold on. Do you want to back up? No,
no. That's fine. That's it? That was good. Okay.
I thought you had other... We'll take a segue.
It was awful. Oh, I thought it was great. It
was wonderful. It was great. We should probably
fill in the pants people that we are recording
on Thanksgiving morning, but you guys are hearing
this like a week and a half later. Yes. We love
this podcast. We love the pants people so much
that we took the time out of our busy Thanksgivings
to get together and play some fantasy pants.
Oh, yeah. You know what? You know what? While
we're here, while it's Thanksgiving, before we
get to all the other stuff going on, we'll get
to that. We'll get to that. What are you guys
thankful for? Oh. Let's do our Thanksgiving thing.
Oh. I'll start. Okay. I will start. I'll tell
you this. I am thankful. for Rochelle, soundpukigirl
on Instagram, and in the Discord, who has come
in so, so clutch again for our little story.
I messaged her after last week. Actually, real
quick before it goes away forever, let's take
one last look at this map that Steven so rudely
blew up. We'll get to that. But look at this.
Oh, I don't have my laptop pulled up. Damn it.
Well, look at the full Shrine of Stars. Jeremy,
you can look at it. You're cool. Look at this
beautiful Shrine of Stars. We never really actually
talked about it last time. I know. The full picture,
the full image. Look at that last storm sanctum,
the floating sort of orb, storm orb. It's beautiful.
It's so cool. I meant to ask if that storm orb
was a Rochelle art or if she found something
to input into there because it looks... I mean,
it looks really, really cool. It's really, really
cool. It's ethereal and squiggly and shiny. Just
like overtaking the whole inner sanctum. It's
just cool. I love it. I love the inner sanctum.
It's just a simple place, but when you get there,
it's just like this glorious, very magical event
forever occurring in this one isolated space,
closed off from the world behind this grand shrine.
Like, oh, what a map. We've had four combats
on this map. Yeah, Jesus Christ. Although the
fifth one's going to be on a little different
map. Because after last week, I had to talk to
Rochelle. I had to be like, okay, we blew up
your map. Can I have a new one? And damn, did
she deliver. I'll show you guys later. These
are hand -drawn maps. So it's not like, okay,
yeah, let me just go change a few things on this
map. Well, I think she edited it and altered
it for me. But like, it's really cool. I don't
know if she like, just like. painted over her
like or drew over her like original version i'm
really she also wrecked it i'm actually curious
now if she like if she like blew up her version
too right or she has a copy somewhere the magic
of showbiz oh it's yeah so cool and and like
as amazing and cool as these maps are it doesn't
really hit you until you see them in person we
saw them at mountain mania last year at least
some of them rochelle brought her like map books
and man the tactile experience of like holding
them and looking at them is, is even cooler than,
than having them on roll 20, which is incredible.
And I am also very thankful for that. bring it
back to thanks. Bring it back to thanks. And
I will thank you, Pantsy people, to come check
out the Discord, look under Battle Maps, and
check out all of Rochelle's work in all its glory,
with all our tokens set, relive all the fantastic
combats we've had here in this show, all the
big moments right there in our Discord Battle
Maps. But back to thanks, back to thanks. Jeremy
Wolf, what are you thankful for? Hey, I'm thankful
for you guys. Oh my gosh. And the community that
we've built just so fucking organically. It's
been a great two years. It. And many more to
come. Yeah, here's to many more. Yeah, I'm thankful.
Yeah. Cheers, gentlemen. On top of the thanks
that you two have expressed, I don't want to
get too like, oh, yeah, our pants people, blah,
blah, blah. But in a sort of roundabout way,
I'm very thankful for the Spotify. end of year,
the rap thing that they do, or like it shows
us, you know, the listening time and the downloads
and blah, blah, blah. I think it's a really cool
and fun metric. We're able to see growth there
in a really fun way and share it with everybody.
And, you know, none of that would happen without,
you know, you wonderful listener who can hear
my voice right now. So thank you for making our
Spotify wrapped. Super interesting and fun and
cool. Look forward to it every year. Yeah. I
think we're about to be thankful for one more
thing, gentlemen. Because I've got a question.
I've got another burning question. What is in
that box? What's in the box? We've got a box!
Oh, it's been months. Baby, it's been a while.
Andrew, Hooli Forged, sent us this huge box.
And he said he's got something for everybody
in there. Oh my gosh. Let's crack this bad boy
open, huh? Let me go get my murder knife. Get
your Steven's murder knife. He always has one.
Alright, who's cutting this bad boy open? Steven,
murder knife. Alright, murder knife. It's too
far from me. I can't reach it. Okay, hold on.
Look at him. Wielding that knife like a real
pro. I mean, that blade is so damn old it probably
will do no damage. On his hands, I can. Okay,
the first thing I'm seeing is Wicked Grove hard
cider. Oh my goodness. Oh, it's full. The box
is full. Oh my goodness. Whoa, there's a bunch
of drinks in here. It is like sunrise. It is
so early in the day. And yeah, I'm feeling the
pressure. I'm feeling the pressure of going into
this thing. It's Thanksgiving. I'm sorry, guys,
but I will be drinking something here. I think
I have to as well. This has to be a David thing.
Here you go. Can I have the old bottle opener?
Yes. Give me this. Tell us what you got there.
This is Wicked Grove Hard Cider Crisp Apple.
Let me... Hold on, hold on. Just before you crack
it, there are other things. I want to at least
give you an option. I'm holding this one. Okay,
go for it. The bottle opener has chosen. Look
at it. It's poised. Yeah. Ready? Andrew's Hooli
Forge bottle opener opening cider from Andrew.
So poetic. I've got another one here. A 16 ounce
can of busky hard cider made with Virginia apples.
That's probably another David cider. Lindman's.
I feel like I've seen this brand before, right?
Have we even had this before, maybe? This is
a peach lambic. What? Something that David and
or Jeremy might enjoy. From Aslan Beer Co. Arctic
sauce, sour ale. Oh my goodness. With blue raspberry
flavor, cherry, lime, milk sugar, and vanilla.
I've been spoiled. You have been spoiled. Ooh,
and a Belgian triple here. Whoa. Whoa. Let me
see. That sounds tailored to old Mr. Rodriguez.
Yeah, I think I'm the only one who's a big Belgian
fan here. Yeah, it's imported from Belgium. This
is lovely. Holy smokes. Holy crap, Andrew. Now,
the trick question is, do I want to open a Belgian
triple at 9 .30 a .m.? The answer is maybe. Uh,
let's continue to see what, I think there's a,
uh, one of Andrew's potion. Oh, look at this
pink potion bottle. Oh my God. Just like the
other ones we've got. Oh, what is it? What is
it? The question is, who's it for? For ease of
reading. Like I can make out the words on the
spell scroll, but Andrew sent it to me. Oh, nice
as well. Yeah. Scroll here. Here's the scroll.
Oh yeah. I feel that paper. That's so cool. Okay.
The spell is called. polyamorous fog filter this
filter when smashed am i saying that right unleashes
a pink gaseous cloud in a 20 foot sphere okay
so not a spell but you know what i mean all creatures
in the cloud was make a charisma saving throw
or become enamored with each which each other
person in the cloud the dc say for this is equal
to 1d10 plus 12 The effect wears off after one
D6 days. Oh, my God. We saw the genre of our
show and was like, I want a different genre.
I want a very special episode. Not for the kiddos.
And there's a warning at the end. Drinking the
contents may cause romantic feelings towards
every person encountered for the next month.
Jesus. That is despicable. Someday. That is just
diabolical. Classic Andrew. Hey, give me that.
That's mine. Oh, no. I'm going to spike one of
your drinks with it. All right. There's a lot
of packing in here. Let me work through what
we got here. That's amazing. Oh, what's this?
I think that's just a bag. What's this? What's
this? Aha, paper. I thought there would be paper
somewhere in here. From Ember to Danny. Oh. What?
We've got a nice long note on the back that we
can read later. Yeah. And Danny gets a D20 dog
treat toy majigger mafinger. Oh, my. Holy hell.
Andrew sent us some treats. Oh, it's like a treat
dispenser. A treat dispenser. Exactly. So Danny
can roll for us. Oh, my God. If we ever want
to do a Danny roll. She is going to love all
of this. Wait, this is actually adorable. Oh,
okay. Read it, please. Read it while I open this
Belgian triple. I'm sorry. I'm just going to
do it. Hey, Fantasy Pants crew. I want to thank
you for all the happy times you have brought
to my dad. Since he has found your show, I have
seen him laugh more, smile more, and I've even
sat with him while he listens to his favorite
episodes when he gets the big sads. He likes
the one with the pangolins flooding the town
to the sound of these lights. My favorite is...
My favorite's the one where he goes, clarp, clarp,
clarp, clarp, clarp. Honestly, yeah, yeah. Did
it for you, Ember. Big dogs are so funny. Anyway,
I need to leave room for my message to Danny.
May your sticks never get stuck out of reach,
Ember. Thank you. Danny, you never get mail,
and that's not fair. With your looks, you could
be the star of this show. No one disagrees. so
you can join it and make d20 rolls too i've included
a toy just for you dogs rule cats drool okay
hang on well all right ember let's uh ember uh
cats are you know cats pee to my laptop multiple
times so you know what maybe you're right maybe
you're right oh that is so sweet yeah thank you
so much really really incredible that's amazing
such a lovely thing uh and this this triple is
delicious in just the way i need to start off
a debaucherous Thanksgiving holiday. And I have
opened up the Lambic. Oh, excellent. And honestly,
I'll tell you guys right now, you made the right
move opening up some alcohol because I'm going
to be very clear with you. Today... Oh, he likes
it. Oh, my God. It's so good. Sorry, David. You
were talking? Yeah. I'm going to give you nothing
else to be thankful for. Oh, God. Yeah. Before
we get into Smash territory, let's take a brief
pause so that I can... clean up the space and
get my my dice accoutrement out get ready for
death all right let's do it let's do it thank
you so much so you guys think are you ready are
you ready what happened i'm what's going on guys
i'm equipped with a drink and i'm ready to get
into it hell yeah it's time to answer some questions
but we'll get to that we'll get to that because
i got one more thing i want to do before we Get
back into Endemedia Res, back into our now. Flashback.
Oh. Flashback. It is sunset in the Preserve of
the Ancestors, and the fastened crystal walls
and ceiling that surrounds the Great Preserve
are burning with a beautiful orange glow. We
see Crispin and Dresden moving up a grassy hill
surrounded by similar rolling hills that mirror
the region around the town of Promise on the
world of God's Breath. Above and ahead of you
looms a being of connected, shining red gemstones,
their framework rising up high and splaying out.
Though no wind runs through your hair and fur,
the jasper pecan tree seems to sway in an easy,
constant dance. The sounds of tinkling gemstones
mingling with the deeper sound of distant thunder.
The two of you have gotten used to the pressure,
the gravity that these beings seem to exude,
and so as you come close, you are surprised to
find this hilltop holds a very light feeling.
A gemstone branch seems to wave to you as you
approach. Hey, if it isn't Crispin Dubois. Have
you been? This is like a very revered... Spirit,
right? Yeah, this is one of the Dracon spirits.
It's just a pecan tree now. This gemstone pecan.
You actually have known this one. When you became
a luminary some years ago, you met this being
as per tradition. You spoke to the pecan tree,
the incarnate of God's breath. So, quick, fun,
annoying language thing. Yeah. The original,
like, native word for... What you're saying is
pecan with a B. What? So the, like, Anglo version
should be pecan. Is that what you say to the
incarnate? Ooh. Are those your words? Oh, God.
Crispin says, I believe it's pronounced pecan.
Not that the tree said pecan. You said pecan.
I'm just going to go with that. The tree sort
of waves a branch down towards you like, I told
you last time, Crispin. You're my friend. And
my friends call me. That's my dracon name. A
pleasure. I was so glad to hear that show that
gave us the okay to really talk, man. It's such
a relief to not be held back by the vows. I'm
interested to hear what you have to say. Hmm.
Kind of a thunder slow. It's sort of almost like
this feeling of almost mulling things over. So,
I've been speaking to the other incarnates. We've
been planning out who will mentor you and on
what subject. You'll see each of us in time,
I think. Well, those of us that yet exist. I'm
sorry you cannot meet your own world's incarnate,
Dresden Kelly. He was alright. Still crazy to
think he was slain by a mortal. You should go
to the body while you are here. Pay your respects.
Though with the heart stone destroyed, there
is no will there any longer. Anywho, it sounds
like you just learned about the war from Bastat.
I'm sorry about him. That guy is dramatic. So
for my part, I'll tell you about the nature of
your power. This is more for Crispin's sake.
Though your abilities are not dissimilar, they
are far more limited. A minor boon. granted by
the magic that has been awakened in the fossil
fragment that lies buried in your flesh. Your
power is a static thing, a single wish fulfilled
and unchanging. Crispin, though, you are a true
Mazir Drakkar. I keep hearing that. Perhaps you
can better define it for me. Define. Yeah, man.
Speaker with spirit, speaker with serpent. It's
a strange word. In truth, it really should be
more like those who speak directly with the spirits
of the great serpents. Our old tongue is odd,
though. There's a lot said without saying a lot,
you know? That is quite a mouthful. Basically,
those of your abilities were prophets in the
old world. Our prophets. You were chosen by us,
granted power to serve your people in our stead
with our blessings. You might... Call them warlocks
in modern tongues, though that is a vast simplification
of a Mazir Drakon's role. They would represent
the people, but this gift could be weaponized
against the Drakon. We trusted in you all, and
so we did not fear you enough. But the mightiest
and most innately talented of the Mazir Drakon
were able to bring... reach out to our souls
directly, and pull upon our power even against
our wishes. This was a major factor that led
to the Great War. We incarnates aren't all sure
how your luck keeps springing up throughout the
world now. We think it may be our dead kin who
still cling to their roles as gods and protectors.
and occasionally choose heroes to serve in times
of dire need. They force a sort of hole in your
own soul that allows it to reach into their own.
You know what I'm saying, man? I don't wish to.
I don't wish to attack you with my powers. I
just want to know how to use them to save our
worlds. I'm not worried about me in particular.
Us incarnates are... Souls are firmly locked
away in our heart stones. Not really receptive
to your call. But the point of what I'm saying,
Crispin, is as you grow, your power will grow
with you. You can easily touch our power in small
ways, readings of the future, minor shaping of
your form and of the land around. When you really
connect with us, there is little that a Mazir
Drakon cannot do. Just brace yourself, buddy.
The ancient magic of the serpents can be... Now
then, back to the present. Back to the Shrine
of Storms. I think my former description was
an apt one. Playing tug -of -war with the power
of a god. And as you pull upon this power, crisp
and wishing for a miracle, something pulls back
hard. You feel a deep tearing, a guttural animal
scream reverberating through your connected soul,
a voice both silent yet loud enough to carry
across all of the worlds to those with the ability
to hear it. Dresden, you stand at the back of
this cavern, near the partitions of black stone
wall that form an entrance. You hear silence
outside, no rain, no wind, no chimes of warning.
But you are struck by the sudden sound of something
dropping hard onto a metal surface. Someone,
you realize, leaping onto the roof of the apparatus
of the crab right behind you at the opening to
this chamber. Crispin, you stand above the smooth
black fossil that protrudes from the earth in
the chamber's center. The orb of swirling storm
clouds, maybe 20 feet in diameter, suddenly compresses
itself, shrinking to the size of a marble. The
air goes deathly still, sound and breath stolen
away. A tremor runs through the earth, through
you. There's one last lingering will that presses
into you from the doomed soul of the Drakkon.
A will to protect. A will that you find yourself
channeling, shaking with it. It fills you, Crispin.
A power. A last miracle. Your mind instinctively
reaches out and you can feel your allies. Dresden,
what are your immediate thoughts and feelings
right now in this moment? I think for the first
time in a long time, Dresden feels a tinge of
genuine fear. I think while he's inside, he takes
his hands and braces them against each side of
the wall. Kind of plants his feet a little bit
and gets ready. For whatever's coming. Something's
coming. A surge. You already brace yourself.
You feel him. Crispin, do you protect him? Yeah,
absolutely. Yeah, whatever. A surge of something,
some power surrounds you, Drez. You can feel
it. A sort of disconnection from the air, from
the world outside. Crispin, you feel another
form, too. Outside of this chamber, somewhere
in the Court of Beauty. Shock from Akio. In an
overwhelming sense of joy. A single word in the
mind. Master! Do you protect him, too? Akio?
Yeah. You may protect him as well. Absolutely.
The same presence, like a tentacle reaching out.
One to Dresden, one to Akio, two helping hands,
two tentacles, and wrapping them, protecting
them. And then... A flash of light, blinding
bright. By the time you hear the roaring of the
wind, the breaking of stones, you are already
flying, flung through the air, bouncing in stone
that seems to rebound off the magical barrier
that surrounds you both. You crash and you roll,
licked by bolts of scattered lightning. You are
engulfed by the spreading light of pure magical
force. From your perspective, you do not see
the form of this light, a great serpentine shape
of light and force blasting through the shrine,
through the seaside cliff, roaring towards the
sky where the dark clouds have parted in a great
oh, revealing serene blue above. A rainbow arcs
around this form, shooting up from the shrine's
location, signaling an abrupt end to the storm
and the freeing of a god's very soul. Blanche
and Jules, they see this as the wind around them
dies, as they push more fervently towards their
goal. Arhalon, not far behind, sees this. His
teeth grit as his wings push ever stronger. Those
that surround the pearl -conquered Jules see
this. People screaming, shield -bearers bringing
shaking hands to weapons, some more elderly figures
dropping to their knees and bowing towards the
figure, humming a prayer as it vanishes into
the endless sky. But Crispin and Dresden see
none of this. For the two of you, the light simply
fades into darkness. Dresden, you open your eyes,
understanding immediately that only seconds have
passed. You see only shadowed, blurred images
resolving around you. One figure still standing,
moving a ways ahead of you. A voice muffled by
the sound of a continuous tone. That sort of
titanous effect you always hear in action movies.
There are big explosions and cool shit happens.
That was quite something. I could feel your pull,
Mr. Drakon. And so I pulled back hard. I think
we released the very soul of my kin. A mercy,
to be sure. Unfortunately, it seems you have
survived the blast. The world gains clarity.
The figure before you gains features. Black armor
trimmed with gold and dressed in cloth of dark
blue and gray. One eye, the mask of his Kabuto
helm, is covered by the start of a curving, lightning
-bolt -shaped horn, which protrudes through the
helm's top, curling above and into a crescent
moon shape. A silver beard cascades from the
bottom of the smiling mask. A simple black katana
rests sheathed at his waist. And you cannot mistake
this figure. In his prime, he was the number
two luminary, second only to Atash, stronger
than even the mighty pig man. Ozen Yoshikatsu,
the Storm Eye. Dresden, you realize you are in
the Court of Beauty again, on the eastern side,
your body laying only ten feet away from where
it drops into the ocean. The tile is cracked
and shattered all throughout the court, and covered
in chunks of stone rubble from the cliffside.
While the walls of the shrine yet stand, they
are heavily battered, and there is an energy
missing from them. They stand as the bones of
a corpse now, as if the very heart of this structure
was brutally carved out. And perhaps it was.
The innermost sanctum where you stood before
is gone. The effects of a massive rock slide
fills the space where it once stood, the sacred
location forever buried beneath the shattered
cliff that had loomed above. The apparatus of
the crab you see has been thrown from its place
as well and rests just west of the court center.
It looks heavily battered, two metal legs bent
and broken, yet it's still standing upright.
You turn, Dresden, to see the form of a giant
octopus splayed out twenty feet away from you,
ahead and to your right, near to where the steps
into the sanctum had been. Tentacles retract
slowly, almost tenderly. Crispin, you feel tired.
So tired. You're coming slowly aware of this
new scene as well, though you feel Ozen before
you see or hear. There is sensation from him,
both alien and familiar, much akin to the reaching,
desperate souls of the dead Drakkon. There is
a gravity to his presence, as if his very will
is pushing you down, not unlike standing before
one of the incarnates. Just during this, I'm
assuming there's going to be a monologue. Let
me know when or if Crispin can act. Okay, okay,
hell yeah. You're kind of just slowly coming
to. Yeah, yeah. Ozen stops moving, standing in
place just south of the court's center, about
35 feet away from you both, giving you time,
it seems, to recover yourselves. From the far
left of you both, also around 35 feet away from
Ozen, you can hear a high -pitched whining sound.
Akio, body shaking, pushes his muzzle into the
arms of an armored man, one of the shrine guard.
The guard's helmet has been thrown off, and you
can see a young, clean -shaven man with gentle
features. No! Suzaku, you can't! You owe me pets,
remember? Please! They weren't protected. No!
No, they didn't have my protection, yeah. Given
the contorted body, this warrior is clearly dead,
as are the five others strung around them. Akio
turns to Ozen, eyes red, running with tears.
Master Ozen! Your guard Please help them please
save them. Did you say that Crispin was like
20 feet away from Dresden, let me show you the
map. Oh, yes the updated match you on the map.
Yes, please Take a look at this That's terrifying.
Whoa, hold on. It's still loading, but I can
see lots of rocks. It's cracked off the tile.
Rubble fills the space. Sanctum is gone. The
whole Sanctum is gone. Everyone's just covered
in boulders. It always stands just south of the
court center. About 35 feet away from all of
you, kind of looking you all down. This is so
crisp and groggily sort of coming to. I hope,
still has the note in one of his tentacles. You're
protecting it. Shoved it in your little stupid
octopus mouth as you exploded. With his... I
think the octopus has 10 feet of reach. Oh, no.
15 feet of reach, actually. Holy moly. Holds
the note out towards Dresden and slowly crawls
in Dresden's direction to hand him the note.
As you start crawling, you see Akio still kind
of crying out. Ozen ignores him, his eye focused
wholly on you. Ah, so you did find what you were
looking for, dogs of Sholei. You see Akio's eyes
open wide, shocking his features as he turns
to look at you as well. Once I had realized what
had been left in the sanctum, I knew I would
need to keep a secret vigil over the shrine.
I couldn't very well pop in here and destroy
it myself. Not when anyone but the Keeper is
disallowed from the Soul Sanctum. And the Keeper
himself is known to be dead. Still, I had worried
the most clever among my adversaries would find
a way to get their eyes into the Sanctum. A concern
that seems to have been valid. It does pay to
take care. Though the fact that you are still
here likely means your findings have not yet
been reported. I had worried I could have been
too late, as conjuring the Soulstorm does take
some effort. But no harm done, though the entire
world must pay the price for your efforts. If
it is any consolation, not many others will truly
die, though I will absolutely need to kill you.
Akio, just... Master, what are you saying? And
Akio. It seems you battle alongside your master's
enemies now. That seems a very bad dog thing
to do. These two are agents of Speaker Sholey
Brass. They staged this entire thing, played
you for a fool in order to claim the shrine's
secrets. Will you tolerate their continued breath,
knowing what they've done? Dude, he just killed
all the shrine guards. They saved my life. They
helped me save the... The cat looks back, tail
dropping. The shrine guard heard. The shrine
guard failed utterly to protect my interests.
Their deaths were not unearned. You see Akio's
body just goes rigid. Eyes sort of locked down.
No. A shame still. At this point, Crispin, you
are... Just reaching Dresden, handing out the
note, the two of you stand together, kind of
get into your feet. Well, no reason to waste
any more time. I shan't be caught prattling on
like the villain of a fairy tale. For I fear
this is no fairy tale. And I am no villain. His
hand moves to his sword. Roll for initiative.
Oh, boy. Are we really rolling for initiative
against Ozen right now? I don't think we have
a choice. Oh, my God. Oh, my God is right. Am
I still rolling Akio's initiative? You can. There's
a caveat. Oh, no. What? Crispin rolled a one.
So did Dresden. Get the fuck out. Oh, my God.
Yeah. It's over. So with his modifier, Dresden
is a four. Five for Crispin. This is so bad.
It's over. Okay. Wow. And we'll call it there.
We're dead. Wow. Akio rolled a three. Plus three
is six. Oh my gosh. Okay. We're dead. This is
unbelievably bad. We're dead. Let me roll mine
now. Crispin's HP is so low. I also rolled really
low. I think everyone's just kind of like, from
the explosion, kind of on their, you know, legs
are kind of awkward. Even Ozen looks like he
wasn't fully untouched by it. But he was the
first one standing. His goes to his sword. And
even though I rolled low, it's still higher than
the rest of you. Ah, shit. Steven. I don't think
we would have had a chance to do this anyway
with the way that the scene was going, but Dresden
still does have a potion of greater healing.
Yeah, so does Crispin. I will say, you guys were...
I'll let you guys drink them. You guys had a
second there. You reached each other. You had
the note. Do you guys want to drink them? I can't
in wild shape. I don't have access to my items.
Oh, okay. Gotcha. Gotcha. Okay. But I mean, that
extra HP might be huge for you. Right. Dresden,
I'm at 35 out of 44. It's a bonus action to drink
it yourself and an action to give it to somebody
else. Yeah. I will say you could have done either
while he was talking. Crispin went up to you.
I'll give you the option. Do you think you should?
That's up to you. It's still max if I get up
there. It's higher than 35. Fuck. Yeah. Yeah.
I'll do that for right now until at least Jules
gets here. Do what for right now? Drink the Potion
of Greater Healing. Okay. Yeah. Okay. So 44 plus
4. I only need nine to get to full. It's better
than not having that nine. Right. I rolled a
four on the first one. That's plus four. That's
eight. Doesn't matter what I get on the next
one, so Dresden is back to full. Oh, you were
just getting far enough away to use tentacles,
right, Crispin? So you were 15 feet away from
Dresden, or were you all the way to Dresden?
No, I think the... I guess I can just stay, yeah,
15 feet. I just want to get within that reach.
I don't really have... No, I mean, if I had time
to get closer... Yeah, you can reposition yourselves
while he's talking. Okay, totally. I love the
image of you just kind of slowly sliding, kind
of regaining your strength. Dresden, you kind
of stand to wobbling feet. You take a potion,
you drink it, and you smash it on the ground
behind you. Okay. You guys stand together in
this moment. You have information that the worlds
need to know. Yet this figure is going to try
to silence you. What happens next will change
the worlds. You stand together, and Ozen goes
to draw his blade. My turn. Before that weapon
is fully drawn, the other hand presses against
the black plate armor on Ozen's chest. Words
are spoken, and his figure seems to distort.
to blur. God. His movements becoming exaggerated
in their sudden speed and bonus action. I have
waited for this. A subtle, almost muffled sound
like ringing metal cuts through the court, cuts
through the silence here. Ozen draws his katana,
a simple black blade, and the sound grows in
volume. You feel it now deep in your ears, in
your bones, your heart gripped and beating to
the song. And it is a song. One that may sound
very familiar to Dresden Kellig, who has previously
battled alongside Blanche Trudeau. Oh no. Oh.
The tip of his singing blade is pointed towards
you in challenge. Fuck. And then, with a nod,
Ozen blasts towards you in a blur with every
intent to see you dead. Let's go for Dresden.
Slide up beside the octopus while moving to you,
the warrior who has reached your feet. And with
haste active, I do get one free attack. So let's
see what I can do. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. 26 to
hit? Uh, yes. That hits. Wonderful. No, it's
not. One -handed, so only a D8, unfortunately.
But still 14 points of damage. Oh my god! There's
something else to this blade. Like a force wraps
around the actual blade itself and cuts so much
deeper than it should. Like a wave of just like...
Something cuts right through you, through your
armor. You feel blood running up beneath you
under your metal protection. As Ozen gets close,
I will say this. You notice there's been some
damage to his armor. Chinks and scratches. The
fabric over his chest is torn. His helmet seems
to have been dented. His mask bent in on the
right side. There's an ugly crease touching the
bottom of the lightning bolt horn that rises
from the mask. As he makes his sudden movements,
the helmet seems to kind of sway. Perhaps a broken
strap. Could Crispin tell the type of damage
that was just dealt? That was fully slashing
damage. Okay. Yes, it was like, you see it's
magical. There's a magical sort of, it's like
this blade is wrapped in pure magical energy.
Patrillo coming from Ozen, not from the blade
itself. That just rips into the OC strikes. But
it is all slashing damage. Okay. That is my turn.
That's going to be Akio. And here's the thing
with Akio. I was going to say, I was like, who's
controlling Akio? I told you last time, Dresden,
when you told Akio to trust you, that there would
be a persuasion check. It's time for that check.
Akio will not turn a blade on you. He can't.
You have saved his life. But he also cannot turn
a blade on Ozen. He is frozen in place, watching
on, tears dripping down the stone below, paws
shaking, claws skittering on the ground, Allies.
Do you want to let the dog roll for the dog?
No. No? No. I'm making a rule right now. This
is a charisma roll from Ozen. This is the baseline
you need to beat to get Akio to move against
this master. Okay. Okay. Akio, look around at
this carnage. Who caused this? Eyes wide, staring.
Unless you rolled really low. Oh no. My persuasion
is negative one. Oh my gosh. And I rolled a seven.
I rolled low. Not that low. Not that low. Akio's
will is broken, but this is a dog and his master.
How can he turn against him so callously, so
easily? He just looks, his eyes are like watching
as Ozen starts cutting into you. If he can do
this to his own guards, what makes you think
he wouldn't do this to you too? He has no allegiance
to you or anyone else in here. That is Akio's
turn, though. So now I'm going to take my legendary
action. Oh, here's what I'm going to do. I'm
going to use my legendary action to cast a cantrip.
Ozen's weapon becomes surrounded in a thunderous
force. Similar to what you've seen Akio do before.
Oh no. I'm casting Booming Blade. No. And I'm
striking out towards you, Tristan. Oh my god.
Ooh. Ooh. That might actually miss. What? That
is a really low roll. That's only going to be
a 17. Oh yeah, that misses. So yeah. Oh yeah.
Thunderous force. It's still around the bend.
It slices out towards you. You just kind of weave
back the sound of cracking. as you kind of just
barely managed to dodge this blade that sweeps
just above your helm. That's Crispin. Okay. Well,
I'm going to have to use my last instance of
rage. Being in octopus form, I can't cast Shillelagh
first, so I'll lose the plus one to hit and damage
for that, but I think it's going to be worth
it. So I get... Plus two on melee damage now.
So let's go in for that first tentacle strike.
17 to hit. 17 is a miss. You aren't flanking.
You could move to flank. He's only got 10 feet
of movement. I was going to move towards flanking.
Actually, yeah, that's 10 feet right there. So
he can't get there yet. Let me triple check.
Yeah, it's a... Plus five to hit. Wait a sec.
When did Dresden move over there? That was his
echo. No, I put you, you guys exploded. Oh, I
put you, I put you where you landed. Okay. I
see. I see. All right. All right. You don't want
to be where you were. You'd be dead. It's rocks.
Jeez. Yeah. And that was a, that was an above
average roll too. Yikes. Okay. It's going to
be really tough to hit this guy then. Yeah, I
mean, I know. He's a Bladesinger. He's a Bladesinger.
Yeah. With haste. Uh -huh. Active. Uh -huh. Okay,
so miss. I use my action and bonus action. You
just tackle, flashes out, and it's just like
you hit an afterimage, Ozen is standing sort
of five feet back. Oh, right, blur, yeah. And
then back again. Oh, wait, it's not blur, it's
haste? It's haste. Okay. It's haste. That's why
I got a second attack, an extra attack, because
I used my action and bonus action. Oh, boy. Okay.
That's going to be Dresden. Okay, sending stone
questions. Yes. Didn't one of us have a sending
stone? You have one to each other. Fuck. Yeah.
It was never specified that was changed. So,
what would it take for Dresden to be able to
locate the sending stone? Typically... Because
the way that this explosion looks, it looks like
it's still in this room. It very likely could
be. Right. I don't see how it would exit this
room. with the way the explosion happened. Usually
a perception or investigation check takes an
action in combat. So you could use that to look.
Although I have previously allowed bonus action
persuasion checks, things like that. So I guess
it's not crazy to let you do that as a bonus
action. Given the stakes you're up against, if
you're actually going to use, your bonus action
is very valuable, Dresden. If you'll burn your
bonus action, I'll give you that check to see
if you can find it. What do you think, Steven?
Because my intention with this is to call for
backup. Yeah. I mean, any call that we make isn't
going to get here in time. That was what I was
thinking. Exactly. The only reason you might
want to go for that is if you feel that this
is it and you want to get what information you
learned out. So this mission was not a waste.
All right. I'm going to hold off on that for
now. Okay. It doesn't seem like the appropriate
time to use it. Yeah. So... Yeah, Dresden is
just going to go in for an attack. If you step
over five feet, then you'll have flanking. Let's
do that then. Alright, attack number one. Okay.
With flanking. Holy shit. First one is a 25 to
hit. Nice. That actually hits. That actually
hits. Okay, so I'm guessing his AC is either
24 or 25. Jesus. Holy shit. You managed to actually
hit me? Oh my god. Seriously? Insane. You either
just hit it or it was like close. That's just
stupid. Alright, so let's roll damage on that
one first. I think like the boobling misses.
You slide to the side and this sort of perfect
motion you get underneath a moment of Ozen underestimated
you. Your tactics. You surround him. Tentacle's
around. I think he goes to move. Tentacle comes
up beside him. There's a slight opening. You
go in to strike. So with a plus five to hit,
the only way Crispin can hit is either by critting
or being in flanking. All right. So that was
a three on the die plus six. So that's nine damage.
Nine damage. So in question. As. Because this
is a little. That damage lands. Fuck. You see
reaction. That hand, free hand, kind of palm
out. You strike in and are repelled by a magical
force. Your weapon does not cleave. You know,
it's a lot less fun when you can do it. What
the fuck? Shield. It's actually not. It's not
even shield? Oh, Blanche doesn't have this ability
yet. Oh, God. What in the hell? I absorb all
that damage. What in the fucking hell? Oh, no.
But my reaction's gone. Oh, no. Oh, it's in just...
All right. Very well. This will be fun. We're
going again. Okay. Hey, you just got hit on the
25. God damn it. You can do it. I believe in
you. Natural one. Oh, no. What was the damage
type? It's piercing. Piercing, yeah. Sorry, I'm
a little hoarse. Yeah, I did it. And then as
a bonus action, second wind. Okay. 1d10 plus
6. You just feel that moment your weapon tries
to connect, and it does not go through. Fully
sort of absorb magical force, pushing your weapon
away. This is the invincible hero. Oh, it's Noshikatsu.
Stand before. You try to strike again. He blurs
out of the way. You miss. And so you take up
a stance. Breathe. Heal. I rolled an 8 plus 6,
so that's 14. So that negates the entirety of
the damage that Ozen first did to me. Hell yeah.
Okay. I'm going to... I'm fucking spent now.
Yikes. Legendary action. I'm going to move away
without provoking AoEs. No, AoOs. That's the
one. Yeah. I'm just going to slide. Over here.
To the north. He just basically kind of blurs
out of your way. He flies to the north. He's
standing on top of a large piece of stone. Weapon
still poised. Song still radiating off of him.
Ringing from the walls of this court. So far,
untouched. Ozen. Poised upon the stone. Kinda.
I think he sheathes his katana again, but he's
in a position where he's about to draw and launch,
lowers himself, looks to you, death in his single
eye. Now then, let's... His head tilts sharply
up. What? Because it's not Ozen's turn. Oh, God.
Blitz Trudeau. Okay, okay. Wait, it's Blanche's
turn? It's Blanche's turn. Oh my God. As this
is happening, as he looks up, as he's about to
strike down, you guys passed both of your checks
moving into it, which means I've regulated the
end of round one, the top of round two, essentially.
That was the system I had in mind there. Whoa.
So let's describe, first of all, what it looks
like. He looks up. What do Crispin and Dresden
see above as the rod of flying sails? And I'm
going to put you guys on the rod. I will say
at this point, you're flying over sort of the
central wall, maybe over the central tower into
this, into the field of battle. Describe what
your heroes see when they see your heroes. So,
of course, you know, it's Blanche and Jules both
gripping the broom of flying. And Blanche is
pissed. Like, this is obviously a bigger betrayal
even than John Franklin's previously. And her
face is twisted and contorted. But even in this...
Even in this scenario, I think it's hard for
her to drop the formality of screaming, Master
Ozen! As her feet slam into the ground. The broom
comes down. Where do you bring it down? Oh, I
get to choose? You choose. You have full -blown
movement speed, so you tell me where it goes
on this map. Okay. I'm going to go right in between.
Ooh. I'm going to go right in between the three
of them. So right now, holy shit, you land, he's
poised to attack, and you just drop down on the
brim. Jules, you're sailing on the brim as well,
so you are going with. Yeah, if you'll allow
it, I think Jules, I mean, he has no choice but
to land exactly where she lands. Yeah. But if
you'll allow it, he's going to take a few steps
back, kind of in between and a little behind
Dresden and Crispin. You just drop down just
before, hand perhaps on Crispin, or Dresden's
shoulder, perhaps it kind of gives you a nod.
A smile. Blanche, Ozen's eye takes you in. Ah,
so you've finally come. Far too late, my pupil.
Blanche, you size up your mentor. Now that you're
here, I will give you information you did not
have before. Blanche, you know Ozen better than
anybody. You know his strengths. You know his
weaknesses. He is a blade singer just like yourself.
He can use haste, just like yourself. Blanche's
tricks of just increasing your AC to a ridiculous
amount, he's got it too. Right, great. And others.
Ozen has an ability called Song of Defense. It's
a bladesinger ability that he can expend a spell
slot to absorb damage, essentially. More damage
to absorb based on how high the spell slot is.
It's a reaction. He can do it once a round. You
know, you've fought with Ozen before. He's trying
to teach you this. Burning away your magic to
blast away and repel attacks, essentially. Very,
very powerful defensive ability. He might seem
invincible, but you know one other thing about
Ozen. You know where he is weakest. He is not
the young man he once was. He's old. As such,
his constitution is not what it could have been,
what it used to be. He does not have a lot of
HP. He is a wizard. And to those of you who are
going to be like, actually, you can't use Bladesong
while wearing armor. I gave him a special trait
called Master of Defense. Which allows him to
use Bladesong while wearing armor. And if you
complain about that, turtle shells. All right.
It's actually the same defensive modifier. That's
racial. Yeah, well. Ozen's awesome. Prepare to
die. We'll give it to the second most powerful
luminary. So you realize here, this is not a
battle about... Like, HP, it's not huge. Right.
But getting a hit in is going to be hard. It's
going to take tactics. It's going to take teamwork.
Then that means there's only one answer. Oh,
shit. For her bonus action, Blanche will do her
own blade song. Two blades singing together,
two notes intertwined. Imagine Blanche's this
lighter tone, Ozen's this deeper sort of undertone
that seem to blend together in perfect harmony
as swords are raised towards each other. As she
activates that, she'll ask Ozen, are you going
to give me an explanation for all this? Or shall
I wait until... Until after. If there is an after.
Your only answer is Ozen deepens his stance,
preparing to pounce forward and strike. All right.
Blanche is going to cast haste as well. It's
so cool. At third level, which means I can add.
Oh, no, it doesn't at all. I thought I had an
upcast. No, it's just. At third level. Okay.
I was wondering. I was like, damn, what? Yeah.
I don't want that. No, I made a mistake. I made
a mistake. But I am still going to cast haste.
She'll cast haste on herself. Dude, fucking love
it. Full mirror match. It's the only... Oh, it's
so cool. Okay, so that's base AC. I'm going to
write that down. And I always forget. I think
on the turn she casts haste, does she get that
extra attack? You do. I took it. So you do. Okay,
that's great. So she'll... Step up towards Ozen
and go in for her first attack. Blade swings
out. His blade out of sheath swings out to meet
yours. Just 16. Blades meet. A note in the song
reverberates to the court. You owe me an explanation,
Ozen. Perhaps I'll give it to you once all your
allies are dead. I can't allow that. Is that
your turn? That's all she's got. Blade still
meeting as he stands just above you on this stone.
We pan behind Blanche Jules' hand on Dresden.
Share a nod. What do you do, Jules LaRoche? Oh,
no. Shit. Okay. So if Jules can't heal Crispin's
HP yet, right? He can. He'd heal the octopus
HP pool. Which is still useful, because right
now he's in a rage, so he's resistant to slashing
damage. Okay. So every hit point you heal, and
essentially right now is worth two hit points.
Okay. So Jules will, as a bonus action, cast
Bardic Inspiration onto Dresden. Excellent. Yeah,
yeah, onto Dresden. And then he is going to cast
Cure Wounds. Is Crispin pretty low? Yeah. Would
level 2 Cure Wounds help better than level 1?
I mean, for sure. Okay. Maybe I'll do level 3.
Yeah, you know what? Yeah, level 3. Yummy, yummy,
gimme, gimme. Level 3 Cure Wounds, so it's 3d8
plus 4. Ooh. So that's an additional 19. Wow,
nice. For Crispin. And I do believe that will
be Jules' turn. Is the rod... Just lingering
in place. What happened to the rod? Just out
of curiosity. Unless you have any other objections,
pardon me. I don't want to speak for Blanche,
what she would do, but I imagine she was so in
the zone that she just jumped off. Dude, I was
even going to say, like, I don't care, it's laying
around. I think Jules probably has it. Maybe
he's still mounted on it. You could be. Could
be. You could just fly around during the combat.
You just fly backwards after that, and you're
kind of like, yeah, you can fly. That's right,
because enhanceability is still... yes yes you're
like especially like you're fine you're you have
these like reflexes fluid movements okay as you
sort of swing backwards and it's kind of like
daring uh kind of wide or turn um how long does
enhanceability last one hour one hour so we're
still within that hour oh yeah absolutely okay
it's only been about 10 minutes since you reach
the world okay gotcha i just wanted to make sure
um hell yeah and so in this moment of just absolute
oppressive desperate fear this overwhelming,
invincible power staying before Crispin and Dresden.
We see appearing the ultimate tank, the ultimate
support landing down. I think we pan to Akio,
still watching with watery eyes. We see two eyes
taking in two scenes. We see on the top of this
sort of stone in the northeastern corner of the
court of discipline, two blades locked. Oh, Yoshikatsu
and Blanche Trudeau, their swords singing in
their forms, blurred with speed. In the other
eye, we see the giant octopus sort of wounds,
healing, jewels, loot glowing blue, resting upon
the... broom of flying, the rod of flying, healing
this figure. Dresden stands beside him, second
wind activated, body ready to go, weapon drawn.
And that's where we'll leave off for this episode
of Fantasy Pants, because we'll call it there!